#or well attempted dressage

[grison-in-space]

well, it's happened. at the ripe old age of four, Benton discovered he had a prey drive. he now believes that he is a mighty hunter and, faced with the loss of his quarry (another... possum? rabbit?) he has gone to stare out the missing plank in the back gate and shriek. prior to that he was circling the perimeter of the fence with glassy-eyed hope.

this is a new and horrible development, but at least pacing alarmedly around the perimeter prevents him from playing his other obsessive compulsive games like "Rattle A Pebble Against Your Teeth While Drooling Heavily" and "Dig Straight Down Into a Frisbee On The Ground" and his old great love, "Object Permanence: The Game." you know what, I'll take it. the newly awakened prey drive has also apparently overwritten Benton's terror of going outside on a summer's night (thanks, fireworks neighbors) so that he's actively resisting coming inside because he wants to hunt rabbits through the fence.

the one thing I also have to stress to you all is that Benton's actual hunting ability is very, very bad. All this got started when he identified that an adolescent opossum had moved in under our deck stairs, fixating on it for days, and eventually dug into its hidehole and evicted it. He had his teeth on that possum multiple times including an attempt at a death shake and as far as we can tell it played dead and we got him inside before it could wake up. He is awful at identifying mice and he gets so wound up that he starts traveling exclusively at a fast collected trot, like a dressage horse in heel. When he gets frustrated he screams like a toddler that fell down while trying to steal an entire pie. It is hilarious.

It's not that I intend to let him practice on the local wildlife, but I confess that his vigilance is not exactly keeping me up at night with concern over the possibility that he might succeed.

[tiny-cloud-dragon]

FF7: Random Bits 02 - Chapter 2

[Setting- Zack has just noticed the unwanted arrival of President Shinra's Military Inspector. A bit of mischief is in order.]

[Location – The training field, just past early morning. Zack's cheerful mood has just been sullied by the approach of a less than welcome guest.]

Zack slouched as he watched the Inspector cross the training grounds. Tall and whip-thin, the middle-aged man had a long, thin face that fortunately was just long enough to accommodate the deep frown it wore. Thinning brown hair somehow managed to just keep him from being labeled as 'bald'.

The fussy man looked quite displeased as he made his way across the field, walking with a high-stepping gait that he thought would protect his shiny dress shoes from dirt, dust, and other unsavory 'outside' substances. He carried a clipboard on which he made notes as he intermittently shook his head to himself in a dissatisfied manner, setting his wispy hair waving. Combined with his odd walk, it gave Zack the overall impression that he was being approached by a disgruntled dressage horse. 

Hey there, Inspector! Why the long face? was on the tip of Zack's tongue, but he settled for saying, in a voice oozing cheery helpfulness "Good morning, sir! Can I help you?"

"Yes! I am Inspector Percival Pinwinkle Baerbotamm-!" his words were abruptly drowned out by the catchy tune of "Barbie Girl" as Cloud brought the cadets through another circuit of the field. 

"What was that last bit?" Zack asked, raising his voice and cupping a hand to his ear.

"BAERBOTAMM!" Percival hollered in an attempt to be heard over Cloud shouting "I'm a blond bimbo girl!"

"Barebottom?"

"Baerbotamm!"

"Oh, Baerbotamm!"

"Yes, and that is not a regulation-!" The rest of Baerbotamm's indignant tirade was cut short by the column's next round, accompanied by "You can brush my hair!"

Oh, he's one of those 'by the book' types! Zack thought as he watched the man wince as the cadets shouted, "Undress me everywhere!". It was as if any deviation from the rules caused the man physical pain.

"THAT IS NOT A REGULATION CADENCE!",v the Inspector practically screamed into the sudden hush as the column moved on, and he found himself falling victim to what was known as the Inopportune Silence.

Usually native to crowded, noisy public places, the Inopportune Silence feeds on withering embarrassment. It prefers to stalk its victim in places like clubs, parties, restaurants, and the occasional construction site. Anywhere with noise and lots of people. The victim tries to converse over the offending sound and becomes comfortable speaking at a near lung-splitting scream. That is when the Inopportune Silence strikes. All background noise/music ceases, leaving the victim full-throated screaming into the void. The Silence then feasts on the victim's embarrassment.

Percival P. Baerbotamm went stiff with horrified mortification as his scream echoed across the training field, drawing the attention of every soul on the grounds. Windows banged open, officer's paused at their duties, and cadets gawked in curiosity.

"Could you repeat that? I'm not sure I heard you clearly." Zack said as the inspector visibly shrank in on himself at all the unwanted attention.

Inspector Baerbotamm recovered quickly, his embarrassment burning away under the heat of righteous indignation. "That is not an appropriate cadence befitting of a military establishment!" he sputtered, aggressively adjusting his cuffs and straightening his jacket in an attempt to appear authoritative, while his eyebrows did a strange little wiggle. 

"Says who?" Zack retorted in an infuriatingly patient tone as if he were indulging a small child. He suppressed a smile as the man winced once more as the cadets made another pass. Zack wondered what was up with the man's eyebrows.

"It's in the Regulations!"

"Is it? Well, maybe I need to take a look at what's listed," Zack replied cheerfully. He snapped his fingers, and a 1st Class SOLDIER was suddenly standing at his elbow, a book held reverently in his hands.

Hardbound in elegant dark gray starched linen, the cover was embossed with gold leaf letters spelling out the word REGULATIONS. Its air of officialness was somewhat spoiled by the assortment of sticky notes prolapsing randomly from between the pages.

Zack took the book and paged through it, muttering to himself, "Cadences, cadences...Ah! Here we are!" He ran a finger down the surprisingly long list. "Well, I don't see 'Barbie Girl' on the list..." he began in a disappointed tone.

The Inspector relaxed slightly from his state of perpetual tension, comforted by the orderly and  organized stability of The Rules. 

"But...I'm sure we can just add it to the list, right?" Zack said with glowing optimism, seemingly oblivious to the way Inspector Baerbotamm's body anxiously stiffened with a near audible snap! A twitch started in his right eyebrow and undulated  across to the other eyebrow where it made a return trip before it dissipated.

"Certainly not!" he gasped with an indignant shudder for the total disergard for The Rules . "Only Generals can make changes to the regulations! Any amendments must be submitted for their personal approval. And in this case, both Generals must give joint approval!"

Zack was quiet for a moment, his expression thoughtful. He pulled the zipper on his collar down a bit, partly because it was getting a little warm outside and partly to watch Mr. Baerbotamm wince at the blatant dress-code violation. For good measure, he reached down and undid the laces and zippers on his boots, pretending to shake out an annoying pebble. Percival winced again, and Zack wondered how the man was going to react when he found out that Cloud didn't wear boots at all.

"So, you're saying, Inspector Bare...Baerbotamm, that all I have to do is get the Generals' approval?" Zack asked.

"Correct, but I hardly think that either of them is going to appreciate you wasing their time for such a ridiculous request. The army is no place for that sort of tom-foolery!"

"Well," Zack continued, ignoring the insult to his favorite funny song "Since General Strife is busy at the moment, let's just ask General Fair, shall we?"

"But-!"

Zack stood to smart attention and ripped off a smart salute to the empty air in front of himself, adjusting his uniform so that his General and Master Elite rank insignia were clearly visible.

"Yo, General Fair, can we add a new marching cadence to the list?"

He made a sharp 180 in the opposite direction with a precision and efficiency that would have brought a tear of pride to the eye of even the most hardened Drill Instructor.

"Hmmm...what do we want to add?" Turn.

"Barbie Girl." Turn.

"Oh, we love that song! We'll get that update made, along with all the other amendments, and get the manual reprinted by the end of the week!" Turn.

"Thanks, my dude!" Zack said, snapping off another smart salute, " We'll just make a note in the master copy of the 'Big Book of Rules', so we don't forget!" He snapped his fingers once again, and the silent SOLDIER faded back into the foreground and produced a pen and a sticky note for Zack.

Percival stared in shock while Zack scribbled 'Barbie Girl' on the proffered square of paper and unceremoniously slapped it onto the page. 

"But...you can't just make up your own rules..." he quavered, ellipsising into distraught silence. He paled, aghast,  as he arrived at the sudden realization that 1) this young man in front of him was the General, 2) he had screamed at the General, and 3) he had just sassed the General.

Smiling benignly, Zack opened the book and pointed to the very first page. Percival Pinwinkle Baerbotamm looked down at the seemingly innocuous printing, dread nestling down in his bowels like a white-hot lead ball. His eyebrows pinched together as if trying to comfort one another.

The page read, in large, bold, authoritative letters:

Official Rules and Regulations of the Midgar Army

Owned and operated by 

General Zack Fair  and General Cloud Strife

The Three Main Rules:

RULE 1: Generals Zack Fair and Cloud Strife make The Rules.

RULE 2: All rules subject to change without notice.

RULE 3: For questions or complaints regarding any of The Rules, please refer to RULE 1.

"But, but, but," the Inspector stammered, cringing at the blasphemy of this, this disorganization. His mind recoiled from the very suggestion that rules and schedules were just things to be ignored so flippantly. 

Zack tapped his rank insignia, then directed the distressed man's attention to RULE 3. "It's just three simple rules, Inspector. I'm sure you'll have them memorized in no time!" he said brightly as he placed an arm around Percival's trembling shoulders in a manner that was somehow both friendly and mildly threatening. "Welcome to the army, Percy. Let's get started with the tour! 

[yourlocalghoulette]

Part One ~ Grand Opening

Series masterlist~ Main masterlist~ Meet the horsies~

w/c- 3k

warnings- eventual smut so MDNI, this chapter is pretty much fluff, language, reader has riding trauma but not explained in detail (yet), Joel is a softie for horses and Sarah, he's so sweet he'll make your teeth ache!

lmk if you want to be on the taglist!

horses used to be a favorite past time.

a place in your life where you could feel alive, feel comforted, feel free. an escape from reality. home.

happiness doesn't last forever, and you found that out quick. being the best in your hunter/jumper team didn't mean you had it good. hell, it made it worse. more stress, more demanding work, more pressure from trainers to hold up the team and win the gold medals. but one thing led to another, and after a few mentally and physically abusive trainers and a bad fall, you decided to quit.

quit the one thing that made you happy.

sometimes you wish you could go back in time, to when you were five and sat on a pony for the first time at the fair. your mom always smiled at the memory, saying she wished she could see that light in your eyes once more.

living in Austin, Texas, the land of cowboys, wasn't exactly helpful. horses were everywhere, from hunter barns to trail riding stables. although horses are practically shoved in your face in Texas, you've done pretty well with staying away from them. they bring back too many unpleasant memories.

little did you know that a tiny new stable across town would change your life forever.

Joel Miller adores horses. his life, heart, and soul, or at least some of it.

his daughter Sarah takes up most of his everything. she's his sun, moon, stars, and his rock ever since he woke up in an empty bed eleven years ago. well, the horses too. sometimes the only time he would feel grounded was when he was mounted up in the saddle. it's a strange comfort, knowing that you can trust the 1,000 pound animal with your life. most of the time, of course. he's had his fair share of accidents, as would anyone that's associated with horses.

after years of working double shifts for a contracting company with his brother Tommy, he finally saved enough money up to build his own riding barn.

he doesn't want to be like the showy, expensive barns that are found all over Austin, Texas. he wanted his barn to be a safe house, an escape from reality for whoever walked into his barn. he had grown up in the dressage barn his parents owned, and the toxicity among the members was palpable. everything was a competition.

Joel didn't like that at all. he thinks horses should be a man's best friend, not a ticket to a gold medal. which is why he is opening the new stable. he knows it won't compete with the larger barns around it but at least it will be a home to the few people that come to find it.

your mission to stay away from horses is hijacked when you get a call from your best friend, Sōl, while you're driving home from the coffee shop you work at.

"hey, girlie pop!" you answer the phone, jumping as her voice comes through the car speakers loudly.

"hey, babes!" you hear her cheery voice on the other side of the phone.

"Jesus, Sōl. you're connected to AirPlay and about made me cause an accident," you laugh, turning the car volume down. "what's up?"

"ok, you're not gonna like this," she starts out slowly.

"girl, just tell me," you sigh knowingly, hearing her attempted compelling tone of voice.

"I know you don't really want to be around horses anymore butttt there's a new barn opening in Leander and the grand opening sounds super fun. horse rides, food, and games. you wanna come with me?" she questions slyly, using her sweetest voice to convince you.

you let out a long sigh, running a hand over your face as you stop at a red light. "I don't know, babe. i...I haven't been around horses since...since like high school. I don't know if I'm ready for it."

"come on girl, it's gonna be a good time! and it's not like the other barns you rode at, or like Cedar Ridge." Sōl rides for Cedar Ridge, a large jumper barn outside of Austin, and is one of the best on the team. "listen. I'll send you the website and you can look at it, then decide. okay?" you can hear Sōl's grin through the speakers.

"fine. but it's only a maybe, okay, babe?" you let out an exasperated breath.

once you're back home and settled on the couch in your apartment with a bag of cheddar popcorn, you open the link Sōl texted you and scroll the website. the description catches your eye and you click on the read more button.

Sarah's Stables is a small, family-owned barn located just outside of Austin. our goal is to make people comfortable around horses and to bond with these amazing creatures. we aren't about competitions and gold metals at Sarah's Stables. we believe horses should be a second home, a place to rest your head. we also believe that the privilege of being around horses should be available to everyone, so we have affordable prices and volunteer-to-ride programs as well. come to our grand opening on July 26th!

below the paragraph is a picture of the owner, Joel with his daughter Sarah. you look closer to see that he is undeniably handsome. his dark brown eyes crinkled at the corners as he smiles widely in the photo. brown curls frame his forehead, streaked with a few silver hairs. his jawline is specked with salt-and-pepper scruff. his daughter is beautiful as well, with light brown skin and tight curly hair. you can see the resemblance in their eyes.

you sigh deeply. it doesn't look like the barns you're used to. it looks more relaxed, more fun. and it was only a small plus that the owner is easy on the eyes.

you give in and call Sōl. "i read the website. I'm in," you grin.

who knows, maybe it'll be good for you to see horses again.

July 26th dawns bright and early for Joel. he wakes up with a start to the sound of Sarah knocking on his door.

"Alarm!" she calls into his room.

"shit," he mutters, hitting the top of the beeping alarm with his palm. when he remembers what day it is, his hands turn clammy with nervousness. he glances at the alarm clock. 5:40; he has twenty minutes before he has to go to the barn to feed the horses. he rolls out of bed with a grunt, stretching his limbs. he throws on a worn t-shirt and a pair of jeans and walks downstairs.

he finds Sarah in the kitchen, scrambling eggs over the stove. "mornin', kiddo," he grunts, ruffling her hair as a small smile plays on his lips. "how'd you sleep?"

"i didn't," Sarah grins. "i was too excited and scared. scare-cited... scexcited...?"

"scare-cited sounds right to me," he chuckles, pouring coffee into a red mug.

"i was gonna make pancakes for the big day but you forgot to pick up mix. you're gonna have to settle for scrambled eggs," Sarah hands him a plate, grinning knowingly.

"Was I....I was. sorry, kiddo. I'll pick some up later. I've been a bit stressed lately, obviously." Joel sits down at the table and starts quickly eating the eggs. he picks something out of the eggs and holds it up to Sarah. "shell," he says gruffly.

Sarah grins widely with a mouthful of eggs. "calcium."

"lovely," Joel rolls his eyes. "well, i best be off to feed the horses. Uncle Tommy will be by in a few hours to pick you up. love you, kiddo." he plants a soft kiss on the top of her head before discarding his plate into the sink. he grabs his wallet and phone before sliding on his black Ariat boots.

"love you too, dad. good luck," Sarah sticks her tongue out as he slings his backpack over his shoulder.

the short drive to the barn is quiet, with Long, Long, Time by Linda Ronstadt crackling through the old truck radio. Joel pulls into the barn driveway just as the Texas sunshine starts peeking through the darkness, a sight he'll never get tired of. he can already hear the six horses banging against their stall doors from outside, impatient for their morning grain.

he fishes the door key out of his back pocket and opens the door. he's met with a chorus of snorts and nickers as the hungry horses wait impatiently for their grain.

"mornin', ya little glue sticks. you gonna behave well today?" he grins playfully, stopping at Whiskey's stall, the one-eyed, cinnamon-colored Tennessee Walker gelding. he pets the front of Whiskey's face gently, tracing the long white blaze that splits down his face. "guess what, little man? you get to give pony rides," Joel smiles, his eyes soft and full of admiration for this horse. he know Whiskey loves the kids. he's the sweetest horse, always giving you kisses and loving nudges. though he is missing one eye, his other is very expressive.

Joel parts with his favorite horse to go make feeds, scooping a variety of different grains and supplements into the six color-coded buckets.

once the feed is distributed and the horses are happily munching on their food, Joel gets to work. he sweeps the stall aisles clean of hay and manure, then shovels it into a wheelbarrow. while he's dumping it outside, he sees his younger brother Tommy's truck pulling into the driveway. When Tommy and Sarah come inside, Tommy grins, giving his brother a firm hug.

"Ain't this a sight for sore eyes," he whistles lowly. "it's okay big bro. we'll help you get ready."

Joel rolls his eyes. "fuck you."

"da-ad," Sarah grins. "that's a quarter in the swear jar!"

"you're right, kiddo, sorry," Joel mutters, shaking his head.

"alright, big bro, we gotta get to work," Tommy nudges Joel in the shoulder.

back at your apartment, you're awoken by the sun peeking through your floral-patterned curtains. you groan, shielding the light from your eyes with the back of your hand. you pick up your phone, glancing at the time. 10:23. shit. 40 minutes to get ready. a text notification pops up on your phone from Sōl 😜.

Sōl😜~ morning bb! u ready for today?? im picking you up at 11!

morning girlie! just woke up lol. I'll b ready for u! ~you

you turn on your morning playlist and climb out of bed and into the bathroom, where you dance to Take On Me by A-ha while brushing your teeth. you get dressed into faded blue bell bottoms and a yellow tank top with white flowers. you even pull out your blue cowboy boots that you'd stored away in your closet for so many years. you leave your hair down, knowing you'll probably have to wear a riding helmet later.

it's 11:05 when Sōl knocks on your door, and you answer it quickly. She squeals excitedly, pulling you in for a hug.

"babes, you look so goddamn cute! maybe there'll be some hot cowboy at this here grand opening," she smirks.

"as do you, babe! I know one's gonna be there for sure," you grin as you walk out with Sōl and into her car. "did you see the picture of the owner? whoo-ee."

Sōl nudges your shoulder across the center console. "told ya. this was meant to be."

the car ride is full of laughter, Disney songs, and off-key singing, and you finally pull up to the stables along with a few other cars. the barn is a quaint, white wooden structure with periwinkle blue trim around the open barn door and windows. yellow and white flowers hang from around the overhang over the entrance, where a big banner is posted that reads Sarah's Stables in curly cursive handwriting.

"this place is so cute! this Joel guy sure knows how to decorate," Sōl says approvingly, admiring the small concrete horse figurines standing guard outside the door.

you walk into the clean, homey barn to see Joel Miller in the flesh. God, he's even more handsome than he was in the picture.

"welcome in, darlin'!" Joel smiles warmly, shaking your hand. "the name's Joel. so glad to meet you."

you smile widely as you tell him his name. "I'm excited to be here. this place is gorgeous."

"why, thank you, darlin'," Joel grins proudly. he tries to push the thought of how pretty he thinks you are away. "do you ride?"

you bite your lip for a second before nodding. "used to. haven't really been around horses since high school."

"how come?" his dark brown eyes soften, studying your face. Sōl has ran off to see the horses at this point.

"I rode at a few hunter jumper barns on a high level," you explain. "you....probably know how those trainers can be. I didn't exactly want to go back after how they treated me."

Joel nods understandingly. "I know exactly how it is. my parents owned a dressage barn for my whole childhood. everyone's always after everyone's ass and trying to be better than the other and such. it wasn't a healthy environment for me as a kid." "dressage, huh? you seem more like a cowboy to me, Joel," you smile infectiously. "it's the accent, believe me. don't let it fool ya." he chuckles. "oh, there's some new guests. I gotta go introduce myself. there's pony rides, games and drinks outside through that door."

"thanks," you stare after him as he walks away, admiring the way his broad shoulders fill out the sleeves of his navy blue t-shirt. you walk out the door Joel had directed you to, immediately spotting Sōl who is already talking up a storm with a tall, younger blonde man wearing a cowboy hat. you grab a sparkling raspberry lemonade can from the cooler and walk over to them.

"hey, girlie! bout time you made it out here," Sōl grins. "this is Chase. He rides at Cedar Ridge on my team."

he tips his hat to you as you politely tell him your name. you gently nudge Sōl's shoulder. "wanna go look around?"

"sure. see you later, cowboy," Sōl flashes a wink towards Chase, who blushes slightly.

you and Sōl walk the barn aisles, admiring the cleanliness of it. you inhale the mixture of horse, hay, and manure, an odd smell you always found oddly comforting. you take in your surroundings, admiring how beautiful the simplistic decorations are. you peek in the tack room, which is unsurprisingly clean and organized. each intricately stitched saddle sits on its own stand, polished to perfection.

"this place feels...different," you say thoughtfully, peeking into a stall and smiling at the sight of a little chestnut shetland pony.

"different how? awww, look at this cutie." she scrunches her nose up at the shetland, giving his muzzle a little boop.

"I don't know. it feels comforting....like home." you stroll down to the next stall to find a tall black percheron. the small handwritten sign on his stall reads that he's an 18 year old gelding named Amadeus, and he was rescued along with the Shetland from an animal hoarder.

"I see what you mean. feels a lot less fancy and...sterilized than the other barns we've ridden at."

"and the trainer is nicer," you say quietly, tracing the white star on Amadeus's forehead. Sōl raises a knowing eyebrow.

"is someone developing a crush?"

you shoot her a pointed look. "no....no. it's just... refreshing for it to feel like the owner actually cares."

"someone's developing a crush?"

your eyes widen as you hear Joel's voice behind you and you spin around to face him, a flustered expression on your face. "no one," you grin. "just Sōl being a bit of a menace." you try to laugh it off.

Joel smirks and looks over at Sōl who just shrugs innocently. "anyways, I wanted to talk to you before more people come. I'm in dire need of some extra help, having the barn just startin' up and such. you seem to know your stuff, and-" he gestures to Amadeus's calm expression as you pet him. "the horses seem to be relaxed around you."

you purse your lips, taking a deep breath. are you really ready for this? after so long not being around horses....no. you push that thought out of your mind. this place feels good. feels natural.

"of course. i...this opportunity will be good for me. I need to gain confidence around horses again." Joel's eyes crinkle as he smiles, obviously relieved.

"thank you so much, darlin'. you're truly a blessin'. I'll pay you of course. looking forward to see you around."

[softquietsteadylove]

Thena is at a tournament and the club decides to fly Gil there to just to keep an eye on Olympia in case she runs away again. Towards the end Thena spots him among the crowd

For the dressage one please 🖤🖤🖤🖤💖

Thena accepted the bouquet, waving to the crowd. It was just a formality, and one she did not enjoy. Winning competitions was why the club kept her, but she was never good at the publicity aspect of her job.

The pictures were being snapped loudly, camera flashes bombarding her eyes on the already blindingly sunny day. She tried not to squint though, having been told by Ajak and Sersi not to.

A hand waved at her from the crowd. It was one of many, but this one actually mattered.

Thena beamed, waving back a little more enthusiastically. She knew he would come.

Well, she hadn't exactly phrased it as a question when she had mentioned this particular tournament requiring travel. And she wanted him there to care for Olympia, since returning victors were allowed to bring in outside help for their horses.

Gil had readily agreed, even offered to pay for his flight, which she had assured him was not necessary. He was doing her a favour, and it would count as overtime for his work, too. And, perhaps, in the deepest recesses of her mind, it felt reassuring to have someone there who she actually knew.

She wouldn't say she was nervous for a competition ever, but the solitude could be stifling at times when it was just her and equestrian reporters and photographers. And they didn't even allow the horses to roam free while they were there!

"Thena, as the returning champion, what was your preparation for this tournament like?"

She did her best not to seem like she was scowling at the microphone shoved in her face. She also had to resist the urge to state that her method was the same for this tournament as all the others; train and aim to win.

"Olympia and I trained for the highest jumps possible," she answered carefully, remembering the media training she had received. "She's cared for exceedingly well at the club, so I'm lucky to have such a reliable partner when I'm out there."

Other riders never credited their horses properly, and it always pissed her off.

"The club must have top of the line care!"

She looked out at the stands again before leaning down to the microphone. "It's not the club. It's Gilgamesh--he works for the club, but he's the best at what he does, no matter where he is. He's the only one I entrust with my horse's care."

She could practically see him now, blushing and waving off her compliments with a modest smile.

Reporters scribbled down his name. Perhaps he would finally get even a shred of the recognition he deserved.

"Do you have any well wishes for your fellow competitors in other tournaments, Ikaris and Eros?"

"No." The crowd laughed, and she never knew why they did that. She wasn't joking. But it might get her out of here sooner.

"So, who's here with you today?"

She shifted the awkward bouquet in her arms again. The lights were becoming too much to bear. "No one."

"Don't you have a personal jockey to assist in tournaments?"

"No," she shook her head, starting to look around. She was hoping to get a glimpse of Gil again but there were too many cameras and microphones in the way. "I brought care of Olympia, but-"

"You registered yourself and a guest, it was assumed-"

"I think that's all the time I have," she smiled, attempting to be polite about needing out of the hornet's nest right that second. She clutched the flowers tighter. She didn't care if they got squished.

"Thena, wait!"

She left the winner's circle, attempting to navigate the flock by herself. She didn't remember the crowd for the last tournament being quite so claustrophobic.

"If you'll excuse us, Olympia needs tending to."

A firm but gentle hand reached in and pulled her out by the arm. She stumbled faintly but Gil made their way back to where Olympia was indeed waiting for them. She smiled, "you're a life saver."

"I get the feeling the media isn't really your thing," he chuckled, turning just so he could walk beside her outside the thickest part of the crowd. He even took the flowers for her, careful not to crush them (the way she had). "Congratulations, by the way."

"Thanks," she smiled, finally able to breathe easier now that she was walking with him. it almost felt like any other day when she could see him at the club. "And thank you, Gil, for being here."

"I'm happy to," he shrugged at her. "And seeing you compete was pretty impressive. I can see why they call you the Goddess of War."

Thena rolled her eyes, attempting to downplay the warmth building in her cheeks, "oh, stop. It's a silly nickname."

"It's a title," he corrected her with a chuckle. He opened the gate to Olympia's stall, letting her in first. "What do you think, girl?"

Olympia whinnied loudly, still full of adrenaline from their event. Her tail swished and flicked, although the braids in it for show were holding up well.

"Were you good for Gil?" Thena asked her trusty partner, whose nose bobbed excitedly in her hold. "I should hope so. Neither of us needs the embarrassment of you running off again."

Olympia's ear twitched. She didn't need to be reminded of that.

"That's what I thought," Thena murmured, although she ran her hand down Olympia's nose lovingly. Her other hand patted the laurel of flowers hung around the poor creature's neck as well. "Shall we get this off you?"

Gil did the honours, and Olympia obediently lowered her head to let him. The tournament assistants who had placed it on her had not gotten away with it so smoothly, getting nipped at by her at the time. But Gil patted her cheek, "that's better, huh? Roses aren't really your thing."

If she could, the mare would surely be rolling her eyes just like her rider.

"It's just tonight," Thena promised her, still holding her head and smoothing down her fur as Gil brushed her properly, if briefly. "We'll head home as soon as we can tomorrow."

Olympia huffed, but nudged Thena's whole upper body with her massive head. She, too, was ready to go home after all the excitement.

"Don't worry girl, I've got your dinner all prepped," Gil added, much to her delight. He chuckled as her ears perked and swivelled. "And I swiped some apples from the hotel breakfast for you."

Thena laughed faintly as well as he pulled two golden apples out of his jacket pockets. "Gil, the breakfast is free, you hardly needed to smuggle them here."

"Well, I didn't know how they felt about outside food here," he admitted, even glancing around them nervously. "But I wanted her to have a nice treat after all her hard work."

"No one would say anything to you, surely," she murmured, also looking around them. No one had better dare to say anything to him, rather. Or they would have her exchanging some words for which the club would definitely have to issue a formal apology.

"I'll come back after dinner," Gil promised as he patted Olympia's nose, moving alongside Thena to take their leave. "Bring her some oat cakes to make up for all the carbs she's burned."

Thena shook her head. The previous caretakers at the club could barely be argued into attending to Olympia just before they left club grounds right as dinner was served. Gil's devotion to going above and beyond for her horse never ceased to amaze her. "Heracles will be jealous you spoiled her like this."

"Well, that little shit can get spoiled too if he learns to behave."

Thena laughed, following Gil out of the stable. "They're holding a dinner for the victors, are you coming?"

"Oh," he blushed, squeezing her roses faintly, "I-I was just gonna get the hotel buffet again-"

"Nonsense," Thena discouraged. She pulled at her hair to release it from its painfully tight bun. "I invited you here, the least I can do is see to it that you get a proper meal out of it."

She didn't have to request he come with her. But in truth, she had wanted a familiar face when she was facing one of the biggest tournaments of her career. She had wanted his smile, and his familiar face, and his wave to be here.

The least she could do was take him to dinner.

[virtie333]

Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers. Let’s spread the self-love ❤

Thank you for the tag @ivystoryweaver!

This is going to be tough, because I love all my stuff. It's hard to pick favorites.

Naboo: When I first started writing Damerey, I stayed in the canonverse and wrote several stories in a series. This is my favorite. Angst, jealousy, space battles, a bit of mild smut (I got less and less mild as I continued writing). And of course a happy ending.

She Makes Him Laugh: More angst. I can't help it. I love it. This was a story that came into my head with such strength I had to get it down ASAP. Of course, it ended up longer than I had planned, but I really liked how it turned out.

The Invitation: A Modern AU Christmas Exchange fic. It was my first attempt at a short, smutty romance, and I love it. I come back to read this one a lot.

Blind Faith: This one was a labor of love, as it focused on my sport/hobby of choice: dressage. Rey in this story is very special, as well, and I did a lot of research to make sure her disability was honest and believable.

El Halcón: My first Damerey Modern AU and still my favorite. Looking at it now, I think anyone who reads it will think 'Triple Frontier' or 'Narcos' inspired it, but I knew nothing of either of those pieces of media when I wrote this. I did not have Netflix!

I'm tired and super stressed, so I'm not going to tag anyone, but I have a lot of writer moots, so if you see this and think it looks fun, go for it!

[cmentary-drive]

Lore in progress, idk how to title this

Just blah blah blah proper name place name backstory stuff

There was this one girl in your high school, you kept eyeing her. Her style brought some of your attention to her, she looked as if she did ballet. She was one of those mean rich kids, so that's very likely. Luckily you never picked a bone with her and the two girls she always seemed to have around. 

You knew she was mean, often you supported a wall listening how the three of them always had something pissy to say about a group of four girls, honestly, you thought it was deserved. The quartet was loud, goofy and cringy, never shutting up as if they had some main character complex. Hearing the arguments between them all was some sort of entertainment, because Sabine usually had a point calling them out for their childiness as her two minions had her back. 

Such scenes had you wondering if she was actually friends with them. You never heard them talk outside those verbal fights and each break you saw her smoking outside of school, all alone. Nothing weird, you were there for the same reason, borrowed a cig from one another and walked away a few times, no other interactions with her at school whatsoever. You never had many on you, but it was that unspoken rule to return the favor back and forth, you knew how frustrating it was to be left hanging with no nic on a school day. While you always went for the lowest price, her were the good, expensive type. Cig is a cig, she never pointed the low quality of yours out, but hers just looked, smelled and tasted as if they were made of gold and saffron. 

During early teens both of you went to the same summer camp around Moorland Stables. Few times you landed on the same dressage training group as her, got shot eight few insults towards your riding skills. It wasn't that deep, the frustration was understandable, she just did and said what she had to, for you to attempt getting your shit together. 

For her it always looked as if she was a rider for a living, for you it was just a hobby and a way to kill some time during summer. 

One year, she just didn't appear at the camp, neither did she the next year and the year after that. You only saw her in school for few more years, but after graduation it was as if she vanished. Probably went to some private college or whatever spoiled kids do to get into adult life.

As for you, you couldn't bother to get a degree. Your parents worked a lot, you've rarely seen them. Usual form of communication was some cash on the dining table with a note aside - “for the groceries”.

You didn't mind their absence much, as a teen you never got along well - any conversation turned into shouting whether was it the mess your room became or you lack of belief towards your fathers religion. Throughout the months of failed theraphy and medicine having effects worse than powdered sugar the communication in this so called ‘family’ regressed to them just keeping you alive and taking on more shifts. 

It didn't last long, you worked a few part time jobs at once, one day you served coffee, another you fixed a bike or walked a neighbor's dog and watered their plants. A lot of tasks for your start in the adulthood. It wasn't necessary to be said, you didn't want to live with them, they didn't want you around either. As weeks passed in the rush of your working hours, you lived at your parents place and slowly raised your savings to get a place of your own. 

It would take some time to get there and you did your best to hurry the process. What you didn't expect to rush so quickly was your folks’ lifetime. 

Mid your shift at a local coffee shop you got a call - from the insurance company informing you about their passing. 

Both fear and relief flew through you like a river. No explanation about the circumstances of their death. 

You had to suck it up, it didn't upset you much, but it would be a lie to say it wasn't offsetting. Either way you had to make it to the end of your shift, you couldn't let your pay go to waste like that. 

As you didn't have much time to attempt any grieving, you stood through your entire lunch break by the back door with the cheapest cigarettes and processed whatever you remembered from the phone call. 

There was no sadness, or anger. As for a loss of supposedly close to you people, you didn't feel too much. More thinking than feeling the situation through - should you stay at their apartment? If you were to move out, where? Should you run a funeral? Give a speech during? Call other family members? A lot of questions and little answers. As little as remains of your cigarette pack. Ten minutes passed quickly and you had to return to work. 

Throughout the few weeks you handled many phone calls, signed a lot of papers you didn't care to read through. Your mother's cousin took care of all the arrangements luckily for you. They also kept the ashes remaining from after the burial, which you didn't even witness. Tight working schedule and lack of sentiment resulted in you not going to the funeral of your parents. 

Around a month later, which flashed by as you worked your ass of you found a letter by the main door of the cheap apartment you used to share with the recently deceased. 

“From: Esmeralda Holdsworth

      to Odette Nobledew”

As you got out of your uniform you sat upon the no longer shared table and opened the envelope. 

“Hello dear, I'm horribly sorry for your loss, 

I deeply grieve over my daughter's passing as well as her husband's. I'm sure it's a hard time for all of us asnd I write to you with my intentions of help. Your mother mentioned how you were saving for your own place. I know it's difficult to exist in the place holding so many memories - good and bad. I talk with the Moorland's and we found a nice cottage for you. We all believe Jorvik and Aideen can bring peace upon one's mind and soul. I know you've only visited us for summer, but maybe you could consider exploring this beautiful island and learn to love it as much as we do. 

 Hugs and condolences,

from your grandma and old friends.”

[astrea16]

F1 drivers as equestrian disciplines

—an important analysis from a horse girl at heart

If you don't know shit about horseback riding, that's honestly great and I hope you can learn a thing or two from my brainrot.

Charles Leclerc: Show jumping

What’s more iconic than a good old obstacle course with dozens of sponsors plastered every five feet? Aside from Il Predestinato’s very marketable image (Longines is actually a huge sponsor in the industry and they make watches, so,,) I feel like this discipline perfectly reflects his skills as a driver. His raw talent makes him a ferocious threat over the course of one lap and his intelligence is an incredible asset to calculate the best trajectory and angles of attack. Show jumping is thrilling, stressful, and makes you hold your breath until the very last second—just like a good qualifying lap. I feel like Charles would love the attention of doing victory laps around the arena with one fist in the air before spraying everyone with champagne.

Lewis Hamilton: Dressage

I actually had to rethink this one and wonder whether or not I’d picked this discipline because he was British, but I think my point still stands. This man lives for his sport and for the crowds, and I honestly think that as long as his ass is in a car he would drive laps around an empty track all day. Dressage is majestic, it’s prestigious, regal, and the epitome of elegance. This discipline accepts nothing less than excellence and the judges are notorious for being extremely picky, rarely ever giving the maximum score to a movement. It may not look as impressive as show jumping and its counterparts, but it is undeniably just as intense. The goal is to make it seem effortless, like the rider is dancing with their horse and everything else has stopped existing. And look—we all know Lewis is a fashion icon, that one person everyone can’t help but look at when they enter the room. That’s what dressage feels like. It’s classy, sophisticated, sometimes a little bit pretentious—in short, the one that lives under the spotlights. I also think it’s too big of a coincidence that Isabell Werth—the most successful dressage rider of all time—holds the Olympic record of seven gold medals in all equestrian disciplines.

(Also: Nico gets the same assignment ;))

Lando Norris: Show jumping

Something about this guy reminds me of that one friend at the stables that would be there every competition weekend and whose biggest dream was to participate in the Olympics. And yes, that applies to the entire grid, but it feels more prominent for Lando who’s younger and a bit less experienced than some of the older drivers. I don’t want to call it innocence (especially because it must be long gone after five years at McLaren) but there’s something about him that hits you right in the feels and reminds you about the dreams you gave up on. He’s got the drive of a winner and a fun energy that I think suits show jumping quite well. I feel like sponsors would adore him and try to put his face everywhere—probably in an attempt to refresh their image.

Max Verstappen: Eventing

Intense, unforgiving, and hella dangerous, eventing is the perfect discipline for thrill-seekers and people who dislike staying in the same daily grind. Which is funny because we’re talking about Max Verstappen, the guy who spends all of his days glued to his sim chair, but let me explain. The strenuous nature of eventing doesn’t necessarily come from the exercises themselves but from the way they are arranged one after the other with little time to rest in between. This equestrian triathlon often takes place over three days: one day for dressage, one day for cross-country, and one day for show jumping. The goal is to challenge the athletes’ resilience and stamina with various tests. The first one, dressage, determines the ability of the rider to keep their horse in control and perform a series of movements in a relaxed manner. Cross-country is a test of strength. The athletes have to power through an outdoor course of around thirty natural obstacles within a given time range, while making sure that they are saving energy for the third day. Finally, show jumping requires precision and fitness, which—combined with all of the other skills required by eventing—make this discipline the most complete and challenging of all, and therefore the most suitable to our reigning champion imo. As much as I would rather praise other drivers, Max genuinely seems like he never has a bad day and just… knocks it out of the park every single time. And trust me, that’s not something you see often in any kind of sport. Besides, I can easily picture him covered in water and mud, galloping through the forest like a cannonball.

Lance Stroll: Polo

Polo is expensive, classy, luxurious—what more is there to say? Lance would make a great polo player, as long as he’s got the team spirit and isn’t afraid to potentially lose his kneecaps.

Zhou Guanyu: Hunter

Hunter is basically the athleticism of show jumping mixed with the elegance of dressage. The horse/rider combination is judged on their style and technique, and that also comes down to presentation. Both athletes must look neat and well-groomed and have excellent manners throughout the competition. As opposed to show jumping, which can get quite… extravagant at times, hunter isn’t about being the fastest. It’s about who’s got the best equitation and achieves the cleanest performance possible, and that’s why I think Zhou would absolutely slay in this discipline. (Note that my judgement isn’t actually based on his abilities as a driver but rather on his incredible outfits which I KNOW is awfully subjective, but I never claimed to be right in the first place.)

BONUS

Sebastian Vettel

I think Sebastian could have had a career in show jumping before realizing that it wasn’t his thing at all and he retired to do endurance or some western discipline, before getting dragged back into the industry by Charles Leclerc who quickly became his protégé. Although Seb is no longer competing, he’s basically Charles’s mentor and has a ton of tricks up his sleeve from his time as an Olympic rider. He’s actively against horse racing and when he’s not busy coaching, he probably likes to run off somewhere more peaceful—like in a farm lost in the depths of the countryside.

[heartfledged]

A Deep Dive Into Avyra's Horses (AKA: you didn't want this detail for our threads but you're getting it anyway)

In any verse that takes place on earth, Avyra keeps several horses on her property, all are detailed below. All horses are trained to ride english or western, and all are trained for mounted shooting, trail riding, and hunting. Lines by Anonymous-Shrew and Tauriiga.

"Windsong"

Registered Name: Melody of the Wind Barn Name: Windsong Sex: Gelding Age: 17 years Breed: Arctic Draft Height: 20 hands Phenotype: Silver dapple tobiano Disciplines: Reining (retired), light draft work Blurb: The oldest horse on the property, Windsong is fairly tried and true, steady in nature. He was diagnosed with congenital cataracts at around the age of ten, which slowly took his sight until he became totally blind after about five years. Despite his blindness, he is still sound, and can be ridden on trails or for leisure. He is well trained and responsive to voice commands, as well as seat aids. His lack of sight doesn't slow him down and he is still eager to please.

"Obi"

Registered Name: Whispering Obsidian Barn Name: Obi Sex: Stallion Age: 5 years Breed: Classic Alfkak Height: 18 hands Phenotype: Dapple grey on black Disciplines: Classical and contemporary dressage, working equitation Blurb: Obi is a difficult to entertain youngster of a horse. He is polite on the ground around people and other horses (including mares) but can get bored and restless under saddle with repetitive work. He is curious and not easily frightened, and requires enrichment and puzzles to keep his mind active when not being worked.

"Fireball"

Registered Name: Shot of Fireball Barn Name: Fireball Sex: Mare Age: 13 years Breed: Australian warmblood Height: 16.3 hands Phenotype: Sooty seal bay (hidden splash) Disciplines: Showjumping, xc, dressage Blurb: Fireball is a well trained, all-around mare. There isn't much she won't attempt, and she does keep her rider safe. However, she has a large stride and power, which can be intimidating for a beginner rider. She is the leader of the herd and acts like it around other horses, being the first to demand pets or food in the pasture. She's smart and can easily manipulate a rider's shape to make her do the least work possible.

"Sorrel"

Registered Name: Garden Sorrel Barn Name: Sorrel Sex: Mare Age: 12 years Breed: American mustang Height: 16.1 hands Phenotype: Sooty buckskin with tiger eye Disciplines: Reining, sorting Blurb: Sorrel can be difficult to handle on the ground, and under saddle she is still in training. She is stocky and thick maned, characteristic of a wild mustang. She has spirit and a general distrust of people, which is being worked on with the promise of treats and a gentle touch. She is intelligent and quick to learn, but still has bouts of wild spirit. She was originally captured in Wyoming.

"Robin"

Registered Name: Robin's Spring Barn Name: Robin Sex: Mare Age: 7 years Breed: Arabian Height: 14 hands Phenotype: Chestnut Disciplines: Reining, endurance Blurb: Robin is the smallest of Avyra's horses. She is hotheaded and easy to startle. It can be difficult to sit her flights, and she doesn't like standing still for very long. She has fast gaits and tends to be quite talkative, especially if away from the herd.

[ellieauthor]

15 Questions | 15 People

Rules: Answer these 15 Questions, then Tag 15 People

tagged by the wonderful @eggbagelsjr !!

have never participated in a Tumblr Thing, I'm sure someone will let me know if I'm doing it wrong lmao

Are you named after anyone? no bUT I was going to have a different middle name until my mother realized that (government first name + intended middle name) was also the brand of maternity underwear the hospital used so she panic changed it while in labor. which is not the question asked, but is a story I don't get to tell very often so

When was the last time you cried?  I cry about everything bc any strong emotion (sadness! happiness! anger! hatred! frustration! fear! severe boredom! overstimulation! etc etc) triggers a teary reaction. and (somehow) even more embarrassingly, the answer is this morning, while writing a gift fic for a Valentine's day fest.

Do you have kids? hard no, hard never. or, well. hard probably never, anyways.

Do you use sarcasm a lot? less so than I used to I feel like????? but still not....no

What’s the first thing you notice about people? how they....interact with other people?? or make people feel?? like if someone is really inclusive in a group setting, or attentive, or going out of their way to make someone else feel uncomfortable, thats always how I remember people I meet

What’s your eye colour? hazel or green or something

Scary movies or happy ending? no scary movies bc I don't love gore visuals or jump scares but I will read anything dark or happy or angsty pending mood!

Any special talents? just uhhhhhh the attempt at writing thing

Where were you born? London, whilst my parents did a couple years of Living Abroad

What are your hobbies? will try anything once, will probably not ever finish it. but that first like 42% of learning any new skill is fucking thrilling

Do you have any pets? one dog, I love her endlessly. I tell her every morning that the day she dies my life is over. it's a v healthy dynamic.

What sports do you play/have you played? ?oh god. lacrosse! field hockey! soccer! softball! distance running! plus dance stuff at a v young age and also lots and lots and lots of horse stuff. only stuck with dressage through college tho, everything else petered out sometime in highschool

How tall are you? 5'4 apparently, after living 30 years believing myself to be 5'2 on a Tall Day

Favourite subject at school? English in hs, rhetoric and logic classes in undergrad, organizational behavior in grad school

Dream job? do not dream of labor etc etc

I don't think I know 15 people on here. I don't even think I know 15 people in...general...?

I think @rattlebag and @katsiperennial Tumblr on occasion?? and also likely lots of people I've forgotten bc I'm generally bad at memory related things. anyone who wants in please feel free!!!!!!

[overhorsed]

I'm helping out a friend who is struggling to ride her horse regularly (not going into too much detail because not my horse and not my life) (ironic when I, also, struggle to ride my horse regularly) so now I'm also riding T, a black thoroughbred gelding, 2-3 times a week. (It is easier to ride T because she agists somewhere with an indoor and outdoor arena under lights).

Our rides to date:

1 (Sunday afternoon): Friend had already lunged and ridden him, so it was a quick ride to just get a feel for his buttons. He tried to duck out of the circle I was riding and head back to the mounting block but I stopped him - ugly moment but he didn't try it again. Steering felt wonky - I didn't realise how much I control F's outside shoulder with the rein, whereas this dude just ran though it. Attempted leg yield and felt like I was trying to move a brick wall but did get him somewhat working on the bit and called it quits as a reward for him. Felt like a messy ride but Friend was happy for me to keep riding him.

2 (Monday night): The next evening after the first ride. Took a dressage whip out with me and did some groundwork first to remind him that leg pressure can be a lateral request and not just a speed button. Found he's actually very sensitive to the whip, on the ground and under saddle. (Not to sound like I beat my own horse, but I will sometimes press the whip - not even tap it - on F's shoulder to remind him not to fall out/in.) T started out very speedy, wanting to run off at trot, but settled to working nicely quicker than the first ride. Did get some leg yields and spirals although he wasn't a fan of turning on the fore while standing still and I didn't push it. Of course it started raining right at that point he stopped rushing so we only did a few circles each way and quit before we both soaked.

3 (Saturday night): Not sure if he'd been ridden since Monday. Settled to work a lot quicker and I tried a canter, where he got quite strong. He got a baked cinnamon treat after the ride - good review.

4 (Monday night): Honestly I was Not Feeling It but I pushed through and rode, although later than I wanted. I'd noticed that T was very sluggish walking up from the paddock which I loathe, especially at night in the dark and cold. Made it clear I expected him to Keep Up, even if he had to trot to catch up, and had a much more pleasant walk up to the stable as a result. Also the light above his assigned grooming stall is out so grooming and tacking up with the head torch as well - yay. Braved the indoor for the first time - I'm not intimidated by the arena, just the etiquette of opening the gates in case someone is riding in there. T was very forward again and didn't settle well, which might have been the indoor or might have been the fact that I keep pulling him out of the paddock and bringing him up to the stables alone. I know I'm asking a fair bit from him. Got some slightly better work then walked on a long rein for a while because even that had him very sweaty. I think he might have gone better after the loose rein break but unfortunately I was out of time and had to get off. Forgot to bring a treat so I gave him the end of my strawberry muesli bar which prompted a lot of head bobbing but he still looked for more!

[prettypurpleponies]

I love my pony so so much. It sometimes feels like an overwhelming amount of time, buts always fun and calming and I just really like her and I’m so glad I bought a horse. Even though my time and money budget are stretching to the max it’s well worth it.

Thursday 5/25 - just a basic ride after work. Trot circles and some good canter work. Did diagonal poles with attempted lead changes

Friday - 5/26 had a jumping lesson. Other people were having worse days so I felt like I didn’t get to go all that much, but we still worked on some things. ALSO at the flat the trainer said my position was looking so much better both at the trot and canter 😊😊😊 it even got said multiple times. I’ve been really focusing on it and it helps to finally have a saddle that really fits too. Both physically but also so much less mental head space.

And then the jumping went pretty well with just small form corrections minus a large oxer to bending line. It made me a little nervous so I would just freeze before the jump instead of squeezing for take off so the good girl pony would squash in another step but still go over. Many ugly tries and then the jump after was also rough because the turn was bad because the jump and landing was bad. BUT on our last turn I actually squeezed and it was BEAUTIFUL and I was so pleased. I can get the hood canter up to jump I just need to remember to actually ask her to jump it. Sergio and most of the lesson horses I rode in California were experienced enough that they didn’t really care, but Luna would like me to tell her when to jump. She has some jumping experience but only like a year or two l. Before that she was a dressage pony.

I asked the trainer what to sign up for the show next weekend and she said 0.7-0.75s so that’s what we’re doing! We’ve been doing it well in lessons at the height but it is like a real jump for her. Where if I set her up for failure she has to give me real heroics to bail me out. She usually will but not always. But here’s hoping to goes well!

Sunday 5/28 - chill riding with trot circles and then just cantering on the rail. Worked in extending and collecting the canter. I can collect it okay but have a harder time getting back extended without doing dumb shit with my body. I like to wave my upper body for forward which is not really helpful. Ended with some sitting no stirrup work.

Dressage lesson tomorrow and then show on Friday!

Still need to figure out her mane. I gave it a wee trim today but I think I will braid for the show. I like her long and wild mane too much to really trim it

[yvesdot]

yves.’s Free to Read Fiction

UPDATE: I NOW HAVE A SET, FILTERABLE PAGE!

I do not have a set, filterable page for this yet because it's just such a massive undertaking, but here's a non-exhaustive list for now of everything I’ve written that’s free to read and does not require any context to understand. That means if you’ve never read my work and don’t know where to start, you can start right here! 

I shall add more as I find it, and the side stories section will expand. Please reblorb with your favorites; mine are marked with an herb. Contest winners or finalists get a trophy. Stories featured in Something’s Not Right, my published book, get a flag 🏴.

Flash Fiction (under 1K)

After the Funeral 

121, realistic fiction; hist-aesthetic; horror

After the funeral, she asked to go to the pond...

IF YOU ARE MADE OF LIGHT.

462, fantasy; romance

As I understand it, Betty Westenra is going to save the world.

Homecoming (realistic fiction)

500, realistic fiction

Prompt: The alpha female in the cool kids crew enters the super secret teacher’s lounge.

The Lover Rises From The Abyss

282, horror

Orpheus and Eurydice meet Izanagi and Izanami.

A Single Cog in a Very Large, Extremely Dispassionate, Stupidly Proper Machine (low fantasy)🏴

845, fantasy

What happens when you pay your seers minimum wage.

Short Stories (under 10K)

Something Weird I Heard About Rebecca 

1.7K, realistic/speculative fiction; vampires

Rebecca is more interested in becoming a vampire than a woman.

Practical Applications

2K, realistic fiction; romance

At Clairmouth, you are either a Tanner student or an Ocean student– and you’re very insistent about your choice, because the two of them can’t seem to agree on anything. Timothy, who missed the memo, is in both classes. Chaos ensues.

The Hands and the Mouth 🏆🏴

2K, fantasy; romance

A classic fantasy chase story featuring two gay boys and a little twist. A personal favorite of the Beta Reader’s.

Dressage 🌿

2.5K, realistic fiction

A story about getting locked in the Sanrio-Claire’s-BtSSB store with your dysphoria.

A Fruit Platter of Unintended Consequences 

1.7K, science fiction; robots

When Annet’s mother steps out for the week, Annet takes the chance to socialize with the family’s housebot, Percique. Percique, having been warned, is well-prepared to argue her way out of being seen as a human, but Annet won’t give up that easily.

codename: violet 🌿

2.8K, realistic fiction

A trans girl famous on an Internet confessions site faces a hacker hoping to expose her biggest secret.

World Got Smaller 🌿🏆

3K, realistic fiction

Charlie, a closeted trans woman, goes undercover as the glamorous Portia in order to save face by posing as her own fake girlfriend in front of her ex and his new date.

Bride & Groom  🌿🏆

1.5K, realistic fiction

Unrequited butch high school crushes, all grown up.

as you were  🌿

1K, science fiction; romance

Friends-to-lovers transgender pining... in space!

Exhaustively 🌿

9K, fantasy; paranormal

A harrowed college student creates a golem to help with her schoolwork... and some other old scars.

Galactic April

3K, science fantasy; romance

A space waitress falls for a lion-lady she is totally inadequately attempting to serve.

The Traveler Wife 🌿🏆

1.7K, science fiction

A Black lesbian in space reflects on her decision to leave home—and her lover—very far behind. For fans of the Twin Paradox.

Novels

See: projects page.

The Summer of Katie (Ch1)

teen, realistic fiction

Thomasina Anderson wants this year’s awkward family vacation by the lake to be just like it always is, but she knows it won’t be easy to keep the peace while being her (bisexual?! she’s still in shock) self… and trying to befriend Katie, the guest who’s just begun her transition.

Forest Castles (Ch1-2) 🌿

YA, fantasy; romance

Senior year’s been bad enough before Eliza gets kidnapped by a sentient forest. She doesn’t care about the evil queen or the magic bartering system; don’t these people know she’s got college acceptances to check?! Red, an untrustworthy runaway, offers to help Eliza get home, but his totally-not-a-boyfriend, Avner, wants her to stay–and the more time passes, the less Eliza trusts herself to decide.

Sometimes it Happens (Ch1) 🌿

adult, realistic fiction; romance

Fifteen years ago, Elle’s boyfriend left town–and Elle–without so much as an explanation. Today, Ephraim has returned with a child: Bren. Bren is clever, quiet, quick, and almost exactly fifteen years old.

Side Stories

Your Father's Son 🌿

3K, KAY, realistic fiction

little!Kay quotes Hamlet at Constantine, and he plays along.

Miscellany

KAY original drabbles

These are not canon, but seeing as the first chapter of KAY isn’t publicly available yet, if you’re interested in the project, it’s where I’d start. It is where I started, actually, when I was first brainstorming these two (and that nasty old man they cart around with them). 

ko-fi | Patreon | all writing | book

[leiascully]

Fic: Citius, Altius, Fortius (MSR, T)

This ficlet is dedicated to the commercial about the adopted Paralympian that makes me sniffly every time.  I don’t even know what they’re advertising.  All credit to AAVE for the “hip” slang Mulder uses and basically all cutting-edge words in American English.

The Olympic theme was more of a suggestion than a fanfare, but Scully still leaned forward and turned the volume down a few more notches.  She could feel Mulder giving her that crinkly-eyed smile.  She knew the remote worked just fine over the distance between the tv and the couch, but it felt like it worked better when she leaned.  It was like Jackson and his video games, a sympathetic movement.

“I don’t want to wake Gracie,” she said.

“Good plan,” Mulder said, and put his arm comfortably around her shoulders as she leaned back.  Jackson snorted and looked away, but peeked back at them to check in.  Scully was glad she was there for him, the Ginger from his journals, she and Mulder solid presences in his life, bracketed by the ghosts of his adoptive parents.

“I didn’t think you two would buy into all this jingoistic shit,” Jackson said.

“We are still employed by the United States federal government,” Scully pointed out.

“They’re basically our coworkers when it comes to repping the flag,” Mulder said laconically.  “Gotta respect the hustle.  Besides, compared to a lot of national anthems, ours kinda slaps.”

Jackson winced, predictably, at Mulder’s attempt to use slang.  Scully sensed Mulder mentally adding a few tallies to his side of the imaginary scoreboard.  It was all so sweetly familiar, a song she hummed in her dreams.

“Still,” Jackson said.  “It’s all so fuckin’ rah-rah America.  I thought you knew better.  Like you said, you work for the government.  You know all the shit they pull.”

“For two weeks every two years, I support the finest athletes that wealth, health, grueling training, and the opportunities inherent in living in the country possessing the world’s largest economy can produce,” Mulder said, a trace of irony audible in his voice.  “And also anyone competing against Russia.”

“It’s a distraction from all the shitty things happening in the world,” Jackson said.

“It’s a damn good one,” Mulder countered.  “At least they’re not supersoldiers.”

“Some of them might be,” Jackson grumbled.

“Those abs,” Mulder said, sounding a little mournful.  He patted his stomach.  “I should have gone for the upgrade when I had the chance.”

“When I was little,” Scully said slowly, “my mother would tell me that the prowess of Olympic athletes was proof that God loved us.  She said that their bodies were miracles.  I don’t think about it exactly the same way now, but there is something almost holy about that quest to go farther and faster than anyone else ever has.  In a sense, we fly without wings.  We climb higher than we thought we could.  We run faster and farther than early humans imagined.  We lift heavier burdens.  We test our nerve and our resolve in feats of endurance.  We subject our bodies to almost-unbearable forces and conditions.  We test the laws of physics, twisting in the air or gliding over the ice.  For a moment, we defy expectation, gravity, and in a sense, mortality.  The athletes of the Olympics show us the potential of the human body and the human spirit in a way that our daily lives don’t, and we feel like we are there with them as we perch on the edges of our seats, our bodies echoing their movements as if we could lend them our strength.  It’s possible that sometimes a distraction is a welcome respite.  For a short time, the world is focused on something other than war.  Many of the results may be predictable, but astonishing things happen and we learn to expect the unexpected.  Athletes from nations and peoples that have been overlooked and exploited dazzle us.  A runner falls and someone pulls them up.  Someone may shatter their leg and because of that tragedy, someone else realizes their lifelong dream.  The Olympics are a microcosm of our own attempts to strive for perfection, a supercondensed spectacle that reminds us of all our potential.  In pitting us against the people of other nations, the Olympics somehow unite us in the pursuit of a singular goal, reached by various paths: a gold medal, and the accolades of an awestruck world.”

“I love it when you give a dissertation on everyday life,” Mulder murmured, kissing under her ear.

“A spectacle that displaces the people who are already the most fucked-over,” Jackson said, but there was a little less disdain in his words.  “A profit machine for corporations and a propaganda outlet for governments.  It’s a slippery slope from athletic superiority to eugenics.  Only the strong survive.”

“George Orwell said that athletic competitions were essentially a proxy for war games,” Mulder told her.  She craned her head to look at him.

“I thought you liked the Olympics.”

“I do,” he said, “but Jack has a point.”

“Hell yeah, I do,” Jackson said.

“I wasn’t saying the Olympics are perfect,” Scully argued.  “Just that they could be perceived as creating a net good.”

The broadcast cut to commercial, sentimental strings music welling quietly from the speakers.  Mulder looked away, rubbing at his eyes.  Jackson chuckled.

“It’s that easy, huh?” he said.  “All they need to get into your psyche is footage of someone winning something and some sad music, maybe a Morgan Freeman voiceover.”

“Wait until you get old,” Mulder said.  “Then you’ll be welling up at every Visa commercial.  These ads are designed by experts in psychological warfare.  The Olympic mindgames.”

“They remind us of you,” Scully told Jackson.  “You weren’t supposed to exist.  You weren’t supposed to survive.  And here you are, capable of things your father and I could never have dreamed of.”

“Whatever,” Jackson muttered, looking away and definitely not dabbing his face on the shoulder of his t-shirt.

Scully settled back into the couch.  Grace would be waking up soon - she wasn’t an Olympic-level napper - but until then, she had a moment to enjoy the half-scripted pageantry of the Games, savoring the bittersweet combination of impossible victories and unpredictable defeats.  It wasn’t unlike her own life, in a way: she’d accomplished things she’d never imagined, uncovered truths too painful to endure, run up against her own limits over and over and overcome them all to be sitting here, in her comfortable home, with her stalwart partner, dragged back from the dead, and their miraculous children.  The glint in Jackson’s eyes as he argued with Mulder was more precious to her than any medal; the sound of Grace’s sleepy sighs stirred her heart more than any anthem.  She stood atop the podium of her destiny.

She leaned her head on Mulder’s shoulder and watched the marathon swimmers cut through the water, one stroke after another, keeping themselves afloat for hours. She understood their exhaustion.  She understood their triumph.

“I like the dressage,” Jackson said unexpectedly.  “It looks like mind control if you do it right.  I’m not, like, asking for a pony.  I just think it’s cool.”

“I knew we could find some common ground,” Mulder said.  “What’s your opinion on medals for horses?”

“Horse-sized medals,” Jackson said immediately.  “Bankrupt the IOC.”

“That’s your son,” Scully told him.

“No denying it,” Mulder said in a smug voice.  The broadcast changed to gymnastics and they all sat forward, watching in awed silence, as history was made.

[softquietsteadylove]

Gil watches Thena train with Olympia and is very impressed and happy to see the deeply bond between rider and horse. For the dressage au

Thena groaned as she hit the ground flat on her back. It happened to the best of anyone--falls happened, it was part of the sport. But it had been a long time since she had fallen. She blinked up at the sky.

Olympia whinnied loudly, rearing up on her back legs and trotting around in a full circle to check on her rider.

"I'm okay, I'm okay," Thena attempted to assure the mare making an embarrassing amount of fuss over the very small incident. She sat herself up, patting Olympia's massive snout nosing her cheek. "Hey, it's fine, easy."

Olympia cantered on the spot, not convinced.

Thena sighed. Before Olympia started braying like a mule and drawing a crowd, she picked herself up, dusting off her backside first. "Hey, look at me."

Olympia finally calmed, letting Thena hold her nose and somewhat cross her eyes to try and see her. She nudged Thena again, letting her lips and tongue assess her well being in their own way.

Thena laughed, leaning away from Olympia's affection. "I suppose you're fine, then. It is a rather high jump."

They both cast a glance over at the hurdle that had resulted in the fall for both of them. Olympia looked back at her, her tail twitching in response to the implication that she couldn't handle it.

She smiled; her mare was stubborn, and proud. Olympia didn't stop when she was training for something. She was of the same mind, of course, but neither of them were as young as they once were. She ran her hand over Olympia's side, looking for signs of pain. "You're sure?"

Olympia bobbed her head, already shifting in her position to try and get Thena up in the saddle again.

"Yes, yes, you impatient thing," Thena shook her head as she got her foot up first and then launched herself up again. The insides of her thighs were aching. "Last run today, girl."

Olympia immediately trotted back over to her starting position.

Thena eyed the hurdle. Olympia wasn't going to let up, and in all honesty, she wanted to prove to themselves that they could do it, too. She patted the side of Olympia's neck. "Ready."

Olympia took off in a run. She was hungry for it, and nothing would stop her.

Thena breathed evenly, leaning forward and gripping the reins. "That's my girl."

Olympia took the jump head on, launching herself up and over the bar. Her back legs soared over this time, her hooves nowhere near clipping it again. She startled a little upon landing, but she proudly continued on, shaking her head with glee.

"That's my girl!" Thena cheered for her, hugging Olympia's neck from atop her back as they circled the ring. She buried her nose in the soft white hair of her mane, inhaling, horse-smell and all.

Olympia strutted, oozing pride. She whinnied, all but laughing at anyone watching in a taunt for them to try what she had just accomplished.

"Okay, you," Thena laughed, running her hands over Olympia's fur. She gave her sides a squeeze with her thighs, "let's get you home."

Olympia happily slowed to a stop back at the mount, settling in soon enough.

Thena dismounted, sighing as soon as she was on her feet again. Her legs were aching and she was definitely going to have to do some stretching. She ran her hands down Olympia's mane again. "You did great. You know that."

She did; the horse shook her head, her ears flicking. She knew very well.

Thena bent her head to Olympia's, closing her eyes the way she had done all Olympia's life since she was a foal. "That's my girl."

If Olympia could speak, she would surely be returning the sentiment, bending her neck in the semblance of embracing Thena in return.

"Come on," she said gently, stepping down and preparing to lead Olympia back to the stables. She startled, turning and seeing Gil walking over to them, clapping. She blushed.

"I wasn't sure you were gonna make that last jump, but wow!" he beamed at them as he put his hands on his hips. "You were right, she could do it."

Olympia neighed at him loudly. Of course she could!

"I know, girl, I know, I shouldn't have doubted you," he appeased his favourite mare's ego. He looked back at Thena, holding out his hand like a gentleman to a princess.

She laughed at it, but her fatigue convinced her of it and she accepted his hand down the steps. Her other hand held Olympia's reins. "How long have you been-"

"Since your fall," he confessed with a wince. She pursed her lips but he rushed to explain. "I was worried! I was going to go out and help but, well, you and Olympia seemed to have it under control."

She had to smile at that. It was gallant of him to run out to help her, of course, and she would expect nothing less from the sweet Gilgamesh. But he was right, she had it in hand, and Olympia likely would have denied him, anyway.

Unruly and impetuous and at times immature, she could be, but Olympia was nothing if not protective of Thena ever since growing bigger than her.

"Are you okay?" he asked anyway, frowning and eyeing her dragging her feet.

"I'll be fine after a hot bath, or a cold one," she sighed, and he nodded his understanding. Horses were hard work in any form of their care. She tilted her head at him. "It's a little late for you to be here, isn't it?"

"Well," he shrugged, but she kept staring. He offered a sheepish - guilty - smile. "I heard you were still at it, so I didn't wanna close everything up until you were done--just in case!"

She sighed again. He really was far, far too sweet. "I appreciate that, Gil, but you have a long enough day already, do you not?"

He shrugged again.

She was ready to argue with him more, but Olympia tugged at her. They were at her stall already.

"Oh, s-sorry, girl," Thena blinked, letting go of the reins and reaching to remove the bridle from her girl's mouth. "You've earned quite a spa treatment."

Gil lingered at the entrance. "I can give you a hand, if you like. At least get you some buckets, the brushes and stuff?"

Thena looked at Olympia. Usually her 'spa treatments' after a tough day of training were their thing--a girls' night, in a way. But Olympia was nothing if not fond of the club caretaker. She was beginning to think Olympia had somewhat of a crush on dear Gil. "Well?"

Olympia bobbed her head happily, her tail whipping around behind her.

Thena looked over her shoulder at Gil in his overalls. His t-shirt under them was liable to get positively soaked from Olympia's 'shower'. "Are you certain you want to take part in this?"

He laughed, though, leaning off the gate. "I'll get her manicure set!"

Referring to the care kit he would use to scrub and clean her hooves.

Thena looked back at Olympia, who she could swear was eyeing her a certain kind of way. She pursed her lips at her young mare, "I am beginning to think you prefer his company to mine."

Whatever Olympia had to say was lost in her way of laughing at her rider.

[suspiciousmammal]

Have I ever told you guys about the oldest german show jumping competition? It's been going since 1920! The Deutsches Spring- und Dressurderby or german jumping and dressage derby is probably among the more well-known horse related events in Germany.

That sounds pretty boring so far, but I wouldn't be writing about this if it didn't take a weird turn soon! Let's start with dressage.

While the initial test is nothing more than a regular dressage test, the riders that qualify for the final round don’t just get to ride their own horses. No, additionally they have to ride a test with their opponent’s horses. I’m assuming that there’s no real reason for this other than to cause chaos for public amusement.

But sticking the country’s best dressage riders on strange horses and watching them go isn’t the most interesting thing about this competition. On the show jumping side of things, you have a course that’s regarded as one of the most difficult ones you can find in Germany.

The jumps are traditionally made out of natural wood, which is something you’d expect to see in a XC course! The most notable combination of the derby is the infamous “wall”:

It’s essentially an artificial hill in the middle of a showjumping arena. Approaching the “wall”, you’d see something that’s reminiscent of some xc combinations. But the back end of this hill just drops straight down. A 3 meter drop, followed closely by another 1.50m jump.

The course hasn’t been changed since the competition was first held. It’s insanely difficult (13 years passed before someone managed to get a flawless round!).

The show jumping part of the derby has come under fire quite a few times, as the organizers and riders have been accused of endangering their animals just to put up a show.

If you’re interested in seeing how riders and horses deal with this particular combination, here’s a youtube video showing all the attempts made in 2015.

[whump-whump-baby]

So your Fictional Universe has Horses in it

Alternatively: People Ride Horses in Your Fic, and you’re Not Sure What to Do About It

horse rider/owner and baby writer here, throwing you an infodump that will maybe help with the whole ‘There’s a Horse in the Background here but I Don’t Know What to Do With it’ thing I sometimes see in writing!

Inside this infodump: Horse riding, horse care, horse tack (equipment), falling off a horse (and what usually gets injured), horse lingo, and behaviour.

1. Tame that beast (aka, riding the horse)

a couple things here: Getting on the horse, getting off, steering, etc

Honestly, I’m only including this part because I find that a lot of people skip past the whole ‘getting on the horse’ bit and I find it hilarious. It’s not a weird thing but it can be weird to describe. I get it!

Getting On

Experienced riders will always mount from the left side of the horse. It's a weird tradition that doesn’t really make sense anymore, but it’s still followed because most don’t really see a reason to change it. It supposedly dates back to medieval times and has something to do with where a sword would traditionally be hung on a person’s hip- mounting (Putting your foot in the stirrup, grabbing up high on the saddle, pulling yourself up and over while using your foot in the stirrup to help yourself) from the left means you wouldn’t accidentally poke your horse with your sheath. Not sure if this story has any validity to it, but we all still follow the left rule unless we’re specifically getting a horse used to mounting from the other side for whatever reason.

Getting off

I have a bone to pick with this. Nobody gets off their horse by swinging a leg in front of themselves, over the horse’s neck in front of them, and hopping down facing away from their horse. It’s not the safest bet to attempt because 1. It actually requires a lot of hip strength to swing your leg like that without kicking your poor horse in the neck, and 2. It doesn’t give you a legitimate way to hold onto your horse after dismounting, which is inherently unsafe. Even if you are in possession of The World’s Best Behaved Horse Ever, you always want to be holding onto the reins. Riders usually dismount by leaning forward, swinging a leg behind them and over the horse’s butt, pivoting sideways on their stomach, and sliding down off the horse- keeping a hand on the rein and one on the saddle to slow their descent. That way you always have a hand on your wild beast, who may decide at any given time that the nearby grass is more important than standing still for your dismount. Plus, swinging a leg like that is basically impossible in saddles that feature a saddle horn, like a western saddle.

It’s a little hard to see in this photo, but Geralt’s saddle definitely has some kind of high pommel to it- so he’d most likely dismount the normal way. It’s just easier!

If you tried to dismount like that in this western saddle you would definitely bruise something.

In this saddle (a Dressage saddle) you could probably pull it off.. but why?? All that struggle just to slide down on your butt and land funny, sprawled away from your horse. It’s just not worth it.

Steering and Etc.

Believe it or not, most steering movement actually comes from the rider’s weight in the saddle than their grip on the reins. If we’re looking at this from the realm of something like The Witcher (which is probably going to be my go-to media example because it’s still pretty recent) a relaxed turn is going to look like Geralt isn’t doing too much with his upper body, because he’d be weighting his seat bones in the saddle. Despite his saddle looking a little bulky, Roach could definitely feel it and respond accordingly- horses are pretty sensitive little friends and can feel most of what you’re doing up there, including looking down. (Protip, if you’re learning to ride horses, don’t look down- it’ll unbalance your upper body and make you pitch forward, unbalancing your horse and making yourself more likely to fall off)

A good way to have a character look experienced with riding is to describe someone relaxed but upright, shoulders back, hands closed but relaxed on the reins. They don’t have to be bolt upright, but at ease. A good way to describe a character with little to no riding experience would be to describe them as tense, probably hunching forward a little; hands too high or low and reins too long. See the lovely photos below:

A Dressage rider: she’s looking pretty evenly balanced, is sitting tall but not bolt upright, hands are low, elbows relaxed. Wonderful!

A Beginner: Absolutely no hate to beginners! We all have to start somewhere, But there’s definitely a difference in body language between this rider and our dressage rider. (Side note: PLEASE always wear a helmet on a horse, especially if you’re a beginner, good grief)

2. Horse Care

I don’t think too much needs to be said here, but there’s a couple things that are worth noting.

Grooming

Most horses love a good brushing. They’ll even lean into it if you find an itchy spot!

 If your character has a ton of experience, grooming their horse makes a lovely backdrop for conversations. Riders usually brush their horses before and after riding, to remove dirt and mud and sweat. Manes and tails are brushed if you want to be detail oriented, and feet should always be picked out (A good chance for Character B to oogle Character A’s butt, if thats the kind of story you’re writing) to remove dirt and stones. 

When Not Riding

Your furry partner-in-crime should be untacked and eating grass somewhere. Untacked means all gear removed and put away for the day- in stories like The Witcher, tied to a tree branch or a rest area in a halter is fine. As a horse person it wouldn’t make sense to leave their tack on all night- you’d leave it nearby, but not on them. If your characters are just pausing for a break or something, it’s totally ok- but done for the day? Nah. Let your pony be naked.

Injuries

Horses, like most prey animals, will hide injuries and illness until they physically can’t anymore. Small cuts and scrapes, dependent on where they are, will probably not give a physical response unless you manipulate them somehow (cleaning, applying antibiotics, etc). A horse may show discomfort by a number of signs, but if it really hurts your horse will probably shy away from your touch or may lash out at your hands to keep you from touching it. Signs of discomfort can be pinning their ears back against their head (aka Ow Ow OW, DON’T TOUCH IT, I’m UPSET) to straight up trying to run from you if they think you’re going to attempt to touch it (a more severe reaction for a more severe wound, like a deep cut/laceration/puncture etc). If a horse is in very dire straits you might get no reaction at all- your horse might be hanging its head low, not really responding to your voice or touch, appearing bleary eyed or dull eyed or sleepy. Generally that kind of severe behavior change is considered Very Very Bad and definitely grounds to call a vet for, especially if there’s no sign of physical injury.

3. Horse Tack (Equipment!)

Here’s a quick rundown of horse tack.

All these pieces make up the bridle, reins included.

*Side note- Bits are not cruel, and riders choosing to use them with their horses are not abusive. Bits are a tool riders use to communicate with their horses and there are hundreds of metal finishes, textures, shapes and sizes to fit a horse with a bit that makes them happy and keeps them comfortable. There are some horses who refuse to take bits, and their owners usually turn to a bitless bridle to keep them comfortable- however this is not “kinder” just because of the lack of bit. These bridles are just designed to exert gentle pressure to tell the horse to slow or stop instead of the gentle pressure on the bit. Different horses prefer different things, and none of these things are harmful to the horse if used properly and with care.

This is a diagram of a close contact or Hunter saddle, but the terminology generally applies to all different kinds of saddles. Girths are considered their own piece of tack and not as a part of the saddle. 

Riders who are riding consistently usually at least wipe their tack down with a wet cloth after finishing with it for the day. Because tack is almost always leather, well cared for leather lasts a lot longer if cared for. This is also a great thing to have a character talk over in a fic- have them clean tack while having a hard conversation, or maybe show how quick and not-great of a job they do on their tack if they’re angry or trying to get away from another character closeby. Lots of opportunities! (If you really want to get detailed, cleaning usually looks like: a damp cloth to wipe dirt off and then rubbing a leather conditioner into the tack, which may smell lovely or a little weird depending on the brand)

4. Falling off

I see you, whump writers. (and I love you.)

So You Want your Character to Fall Off:

Falling off is rarely graceful. It can be caused by anything from an unexpected trip to your horse spooking at something, to a jump taken at the wrong spot/speed/angle... opportunities are endless. I have fallen off my horse at the walk because he startled at a dog and I slipped to the side, and I have fallen off over jumps, because my horse actively tried to get me off, or because I just wasn’t paying attention and Oops, how’d I get in the dirt? Generally if you’re looking for a reason for your character to fall off, they are endless. If the one at fault is the horse common reasons are the rider becoming unseated and slipping back/forward/sideways by the horse startling (at legitimately anything sometimes, depending on the horse.. let your imagination go wild!) changing speed or direction suddenly. All of these things will affect how your character comes off and how they’ll hit dirt with what body part. IE- pitching forward will probably land you on the top of your shoulders, if you’re lucky- if not, you’ll land on your head. Most people will land on the tops of their shoulders as the instinct to protect their head kicks in, but sometimes gravity is a bitch. It happens.

This is where experience comes in, too- Experienced riders will usually react quicker and will try to save themselves, either grabbing onto their horse’s mane or neck or even just keeping a death grip on the reins as adrenaline kicks in- all of which keeps your upper body higher than your lower and can lead to landing on your bum/side/feet instead of your head. Beginner or inexperienced riders might not react that quickly and end up landing roughly. This is not to say that more experienced riders will always come out less injured than beginners, but that experienced riders sense of self preservation will kick in faster frankly just because they’ve fallen off more. This is also why you see more beginners breaking arms in riding accidents- as you learn to ride you are taught (if you were taught like I was) to NEVER throw your arms out to catch yourself during a fall- it’s more likely that you will land on top of your straight arm and give yourself a wicked compound break. Your instinct changes from trying to save yourself to trying everything you can to staying in your saddle. Self preservation is a wonderful thing!

If Your Character is Sick/Already Injured:

The motion of the horse, even in walk, is going to make them feel worse- especially any injury to the lower stomach area. That’s where the body absorbs most of the motion from the horse’s gaits, especially in the hips/lower abdomen. So if Character A has a stab wound in his stomach and Character B has gotten them into the saddle to bring them to help.... Character A is gonna be in some pretty decent pain until they can dismount. For head injuries the same motion might make them dizzy or nauseous. But, good news! If your character slumps forward completely while keeping their arms on either side of the horse’s neck, they will probably manage to stay in the saddle for a decent amount of time. Their lower body and leg (hopefully still in the stirrups) will keep them in the saddle unless jostled out of it. (This, of course, only making sense if the saddle in question doesn’t have a horn, because otherwise your character won’t be able to slump forward far at all. )If they manage to slip off the horse in this position, they’re going to land head/chest/upper body first, especially if only semi-conscious due to previous injuries. 

If dealing with any other injuries, getting on the horse might be nicer than walking but will definitely not keep anything still- any motion the horse makes will make the rider’s body move and jostle the injury, no matter where the injury is.

5. Wrapping it up: Horse Lingo and Behaviour

Horse terms are easy to find and but a google search away, but here’s some of the main terms:

Gaits: A horse’s movement. Walk, trot, canter and gallop with gallop being the fastest.

Aids: what riders use to communicate with the horse. This includes your hand (on the reins) your leg (squeezing to ask for gaits) and your voice.

(Riders talk to their horses! all the time. Even if just to say good boy/girl. Commonly we say things like hoooh, whoa, easy, no, etc. Sometimes just talking to your nervous horse helps calm them down)

Green horse: Inexperienced horse, usually new to being ridden, usually young.

Mare: Female Horse.

Stallion: Male horse, not neutered. Stallions can have a reputation for being hotheaded and sometimes hard to handle, but not all are like that.

Gelding: Male horse, neutered. Most people who have male horses will refer to them as geldings on paperwork.

Pony: a small horse. Not a baby horse. Just smaller.

Colt: Baby male.

Filly: Baby female.

You can probably use google for anything else without concern that you’re using a term that's unnatural.

Behaviour

My rule of thumb for writing behaviour is this: If it seems like a disney dog in a movie would do it........ it’s safe to say a horse wouldn’t. Writing a horse like a disney dog is too unnatural and will definitely make any horse people reading your story give an eye roll.

An example:

Your character has just dismounted their horse after a long ride.

A horse would: maybe sniff your pockets for treats (especially if you had some before you got on) stand next to you as you talked to someone, try to rub their head on you (scratches!! especially if they’re sweaty) maybe perk up at something in the distance if distracted enough

A horse would not: Shake their head at you, whinny at you, prance around and “smile” at you... roll their eyes at something you said... point like Lassie at something in the distance... etc. 

Horses definitely have personalities! They can be affectionate and snuggly, nervous or brave, flighty or stoic... but they don’t emote the same way a cartoon character would. The best example i’ve seen of horse interaction in media would probably be the horses in Disney’s Brave. If you pay attention to the way horses interact with each other and react to events in the movie, it’s pretty spot on!

Follow your gut. You can still have a horse with a personality, but if it feels too cartoony, it probably is!

This is a great infographic that explains body language as well.

I hope this helps anyone who wants to include more horse interaction in their writing!