#or those who feel forced to conform for their safety

[nerdy-nonbinary]

Thinking about Inu-Oh… thinking about how Inu-Oh was ostracized from society from the moment he was born and made a game out of his ostracization but was at his happiest when he found acceptance in Tomoari…thinking about how Tomoari had a system in society which accepted him as a blind person but had no desire to remain in that system…thinking about how Inu-Oh only received “full” acceptance (safety from the emperor) when he disowned Tomoari and their work, and made that choice not because he cared about acceptance but because he wanted to save Tomoari’s life…thinking about how Tomoari refused to give up his creativity and was killed for it… thinking about how institutions in power don’t care whether marginalized people fight the system or succumb to it, we are all torn apart and our works forgotten in the end…

[ironyadays]

I'm just thinking about people who say Snow despises Katniss because he sees Lucy Gray in her...but what feels more painful to me is that Katniss (and Peeta to a certain degree) not only embodies the qualities that the capitol despises the most regarding the districts, but Snow can see so many people involved with those 10th hunger games tributes in her:

He sees Lamina looking at Marcus in pain and killing him out of sheer mercy in Katniss shooting Cato as a mercy kill.

He sees Reaper Ash's burial and defiance by giving his fellow districts a dignified death and sepulture when Katniss remained by Rue's side and decorated her grave with flowers.

He kind of sees Coral, albeit in a much more ironic way, this girl who was ruthless and embraced such violence with the purpose to protect herself and her district partner, the one she nurses back to health and refuses to leave behind, with the wish to have either one of them survive the games, only to realise it was all for nothing once she loses him and is about to die, when she loses her frail little sister at the hands of District 13.

He sees Sejanus standing for the revolution and fighting for others in detriment of his own safety, maybe not even taking the best judgement at times, in Katniss and not only her protection of Peeta, Rue, Mags, Wiress, but also her general place in the rebellion and restless pursuit of saving Peeta.

He sees Lucy Gray, who stood by Jessup's side until his last breath and refused to abandon him, that never conformed to what the capitol expected from her, and her long lasting and unbreakable heritage and print in Katniss' during the entire saga, but especially in the song that haunted him once as a reminder of the monster he truly is, and that came back to haunt him again in his downfall.

But most importantly, he sees himself, a man defined by his sense of survival, by his practicality and selfpreservation, in this less than 18 year old girl, and that's what terrifies him the most about that district 12 girl: the fact she forces him to confront that he caused so much pain out of a hunger that was never justified, that he could have made SO many things differently, and that most importantly, different to what he would try to say to himself, there was always another choice, and he might have not chosen the correct one every single time it came to deciding what path to take.

[velvetvexations]

I'm reading whipping girl right now and its a mess i feel like every other page she is making some declarative statement about non trans women and their experiences so far shes been wrong every time but she just said something about butches that makes my blood boil "In a world where masculinity is assumed to represent strength and power, those who are butch and boyish are able to contemplate their identities within the relative safety of those connotations. In contrast, those of us who are feminine are forced to define ourselves on our own terms and develop our own sense of self-worth." If she hadn't brought up butches I wouldn't be to upset a bit ticked but the fact that she specifically brings up butches just to say its feminine people who are forced to define themselves and their self worth which yeah feminine people do but so do butches butches i would say are some of the best example of masculine people defining themselves and their self worth like butch is a term to describe queer and gender non conforming masculinity but yeah sure butches never have to define themselves their identities or their self worth everyone is just jumping the gun to support them and their identity

It sounds like Julia Serano was really inexperienced with non-transfem perspectives, which is something she's recognized in multiple statements since. It's aggravating that in spite of this she's treated like the Philosopher-Queen of All Queer People.

[bloggingboutburgers]

cw: discussions of bullying and aphobia

Hearing aroace peoples' existential crises over their friends discussing crushes, as someone who was socially isolated and severly bullied for their whole childhood and most of their adolescence so had NO friendgroup until adulthood and NO community or inclusion in literally anything (and when it came to sex and romance the other kids explicitly considered my potential involvement in either to be impossible / laughible because of how "weird" they found me (my autistic traits before I even realised I'm autistic)), felt like starving while listening to someone else complain about the food they're actively eating.

Food intolerances and dislike of different foods (as metaphor for being aro/ace) ARE important and difficult to grapple with when you're expected to eat specific foods in specific proportions at different times - but man did it sting until I realised why I felt that way and gave myself a talking to since my trauma doesn't justify belittling the very real struggles of aroace people.

I guess since the choice between 'stay alone or conform' was never really a choice because I was rejected no matter how cis straight or allo I was it taught me to go "fuck it" and accept myself regardless of what other people do or say (which ironically has lead to me becoming dramatically popular all of a sudden at uni, which has been weird to get used to since I have literally no experience with any of this - platonic or otherwise - which did lead to some advantage being taken of me but f*ck it we ball ^^'). And I guess it's just been difficult understanding why anyone would care so much about whether they're "normal" or not? You really have nothing to gain from that, safety is not guaranteed in conformity so best to live aroace and damn all aphobes to hell if they have a problem with that.

It's a mindset I'll never understand and that's only ok now insofar as that lack of understanding no longer results in misplaced anger at people who, for a time, I had once considered spoilt, ungrateful and out of touch. Basically, I'm full of sh*t and to every aroace person reading this you deserve good friends that actually respect you for who you are and do not even TRY to get you to change your mind about sex or romance. Have a lovely day x

Sincerely,

An aggressive emotional support anon

I'm genuinely sorry for all the hardships you went through. I don't mean to equate at all, truthfully from reading you and considering I WAS asked some of those questions as a kid regardless (the "who's your crush" bullshit and whatnot), it definitely sounds like I had it less hard than you did, but... I was bullied in elementary school and middle school, also not necessarily because I was aroace (I don't know why it happened really, I don't know if anyone ever knows, I boil it down to... me being me and there being something fundamentally wrong with me ig), and I definitely also get some of those feelings of "oh boo hoo you call that struggle" boiling in me when people discuss their own past struggles sometimes, so... Yeah, every one person's experience is unique, but I can at the very least very much sympathize.

I think a way it manifests in me is that I now have that compulsive, debilitating fear of being "othered" in any way, shape, or form, so I guess being aroace doesn't help my case. But at the same time... Well, like you brilliantly put it, when you're in a situation like that, no matter what you do, you won't be accepted anyway, and having that knowledge back then is probably also what lead me to figure myself out as aroace so early in life. Because I was treated as this much of an outsider, I ironically had that much room in my own head to form my own identity, far apart from others and the need to conform. Yeah, that identity may include a "piece of shit that doesn't deserve to be supported of part of a group" side that's been forced in, buried deep down and can't be erased, but... It also includes asexual and aromantic, and it's been cemented so hard from so early with such self-affirmation that later down the line, it saved me from a lot of stuff. I never had to force myself into a romantic or sexual relationship because I was undoubtably aroace – and people saw me as an outsider and an eyesore anyway. I spent years of being scared to go to school or out in the street every day, but later down the line, somehow, I feel it saved me from doing so many things I wouldn't have wanted to do.

...Bleh, sorry, didn't mean to turn this into me-me-me crap when you had the courage and sincerity of not only showing your experience, but finding the strength to show more love, understanding and support than a lot of people probably cared to give you for so long, despite all the pain you felt for so long. I guess I just wanna say... This take is definitely inspiring, so thank you on behalf of myself and others I'm sure, but also... I hope that, for yourself, you're also managing to own what you lived through in a way that allowed you to affirm yourself more strongly (it sounds like you are, I hope it IS the case), and most importantly, I hope you're in a much better place in your life now and you'll never have to return to that level of loneliness again.

[princesssarisa]

Snow White and domestic work

I have plenty of misgivings about Snow White (2025), but I do think some of the venom being hurled at it is slightly over the top.

For example, the way some people on the Internet have lost their minds over the trailer's one-second clip that shows Snow White dancing and singing "Whistle While You Work" while the dwarfs clean the house around her.

Suddenly everyone has decided that the new Snow White is nasty, lazy spoiled brat who forces the dwarfs to do the cleaning. And maybe she will be, for all I know. But maybe some people are jumping to conclusions: the clip in the trailer is barely a second long. I'm sure that in the full scene, Snow White will pitch in and do her share of the cleaning too. Secondly, it's nothing new for the dwarfs and Snow White to clean the house together. The 1955 West German film version has a long sequence where they do just that.

Obviously the Disney remake has made this change in the name of "feminism," and I can imagine it being handled in an annoying, ham-fisted way, which makes Snow White seem like an entitled brat who's unwilling to repay the dwarfs' kindness by working. But at the same time... isn't it slightly valid? Countless women are burdened by the fact that their husbands, boyfriends, or other male housemates view housework as "woman's work" and don't do their share. Statistics show that even women with full-time jobs still do most of the housework at home too. Is it really so bad for a family movie to speak out against this tradition and show male and female housemates doing their housework together?

Of course the backlash is all part of the current postmodern trend of defending traditionally feminine characters from all the detractors who label them "anti-feminist," and arguing that they really are positive, empowering role models. That's all well and good, but sometimes I think the defenses go too far – they sometimes seem to deny that there's anything outdated about these characters' portrayals, and cry "Internalized Misogyny," "Girlboss," "Not Like Other Girls," etc. any time a heroine rebels even slightly against gender conformity. Sometimes it feels as if postmodern feminism wants all women back in the kitchen.

I've written about this issue in Snow White before, but I'll do it again. Both of the above statements can be true:

(1) A heroine who cooks and cleans isn't "anti-feminist" in the least. These are essential chores, regardless of gender, and demeaning them does no good to anyone. In the case of Snow White, she doesn't just do domestic work because she's female. The dwarfs do her an immense kindness by letting her live with them, not only because she's another mouth to feed, but because she's a fugitive whom the country's evil and powerful Queen wants dead; as Grumpy points out in the Disney version, the dwarfs are risking their own safety by hiding her. It's only natural and right that she should repay them in some way, and since she has no money, the best thing she can give them is work. They dig in the mine all day, with little time to clean or cook too, so it makes sense that she should do those chores for them; it's a fair and reasonable division of labor, with the dwarfs as the breadwinners while Snow White takes care of the house, even if it is traditionally gendered. The fact that she's willing to work shows her good character, especially since she's a princess, yet humble enough to keep house for seven peasant dwarfs. And in the Disney version, cleaning and cooking are the chief skills she knows, because her stepmother has denied her a traditional royal upbringing and forced her to work as a scullery maid. Yet not only does she not let this oppression break her spirit, she turns it to her advantage by offering her domestic skills in exchange for a new home.

(2) Snow White's cleaning and cooking don't exist in a vacuum. By putting so much emphasis on the domestic work she does for the dwarfs, both the Brothers Grimm and Disney were portraying her as an ideal female by the patriarchal standards of their day. And those standards are outdated. Heroines of today shouldn't have to cook and clean to be considered role models. Nor should children be taught that cooking and cleaning are "woman's work," or that a girl who lives in a house full of men should automatically be the one who does all the housework. In a modern reimagining of Snow White, it's valid to want to downplay her domestic work, or to portray the dwarfs as helping her around the house – which they've already done in versions from as early as 1955.

[sashasmenu]

on the topic of queer ppl and EDs, i think there can also be a lot of pressure on queer ppl to be thin/conventionally attractive from both inside and outside our communities.

a lot of negative stereotypes around queer people revolve around making fun of appearance, calling us fat, ugly, or cringe. a lot of people claim to be accepting of queer people, but will only accept queer people who look like models. they support celebrities and influencers like hunter schafer, ruby rose, or elliot page but get uncomfortable around regular queer people. these people don't seem to realise they have these biases, and convince themselves it's because of the regular queer people they meet being "cringe", "attention-seeking", or "weird", but it's obvious to an outsider that it's just looks-based prejudice. this especially impacts queer people who are also disabled, poc, etc.

people within our communities internalise these prejudices, often knowingly, and desperately try to conform to avoid discrimination. some people actively bully other queer people for not trying hard enough to conform. when the society around you will only even consider respecting you if you're thin, and even people in your might reject you for being fat, it's difficult not to feel immense pressure to fit the standards being forced on you.

it's an unspoken rule, but we live in a world where outward expressions of queerness, like masculine presentation on AFAB people and feminine presentation on AMAB people, are deemed inherently "ugly" and these transgressions from the norm are only forgiven if you're beautiful enough to make up for it. when conforming to the beauty standards can be the difference between being accepted and being a target, it takes a lot of reflection and strength, and often privilege and safety, to be able to break free from those ideals.

This is so well said and so important ❤️

Remember that recovery is here for all of you 🫶🏻

[kneelingshadowsalome]

Now… we all know König is the epitome of a comphet man. Sadly, he has suppressed his homoerotic feelings (this guy has bathed in comics filled with half nude barbarian warriors, be they men or women, since he was a teenager) and will never address his bisexuality in any way because he's fixed on the ideal of some het idyll.

GODDD YOU WRITE!!! toxic kön so well it's actually unbelievable like it's so "traumatized person's idea of love that they based almost entirely on the dynamics of their family". like in that "im going to do it right and im gonna perform this role so well and ill be happy"

probably even better for him if his gf also comes from an awful family since she's willing to try and make the shoe fit all the time no matter if she fits that, if her own needs come out and she can admit them to herself because nothing can compare to the euphoria she (or könig) feels when he comes back home from deployment, meeting her in the kitchen where she's preparing food for him. and the house is clean and almost quiet and she has her hair and makeup done, she's so dressed up you'd think they're having guests over

probably bc the ghosts of their families (the arguments the physical abuse the fear and desperation and hopelessness and false promises of love and safety) are those omnipresent guests lmao. in their head there's a weird voyeuristic need to show off the perfect het relationship even when no one is watching

cw: im getting weird about gender in this next lart

but i bet könig and his gf in this case would also probably get scared shitless when put into a position that is the opposite of gender conformity.... (?)

his beloved would hate being compared to anything masculine, he hates being percieved as anything feminine. gender non conformity is something they feel is tied to being in a nonhet relationship so they will avoid it at all costs.

being in a het relationship, a traditional one especially, creates some kind of invisible boundary that they feel they can't cross 99% of the time, can't be forced into that other role of their "opposite" no matter what they do because the performance of masculinity and femininity is there in every other aspect of their lives and it makes them feel safe

he is the perfect man, the perfect husband and she is his perfect wife, a woman that only belongs to him and nothing can go wrong

"probably bc the ghosts of their families (the arguments the physical abuse the fear and desperation and hopelessness and false promises of love and safety) are those omnipresent guests lmao. in their head there's a weird voyeuristic need to show off the perfect het relationship even when no one is watching"

This is perfection, this whole message and esp. the paragraph above is art and you're so right!

And your analysis got me thinking...

What if they sometimes stray to the edges of conformity, for example Engel raises her voice and finally snaps at him? König gets to see something unusual: a woman being strong and putting up some boundaries and standing her ground... And he doesn’t get mad, he actually gets intrigued (even aroused??) So he continues to push those boundaries again and more often, tries to carve out that reaction so different from how his mother behaved when he was a child.

Or when Engel sometimes gets to be on top and ride him while having a wicked little twinkle in her eyes? König gets to witness the blunt force of her lust, sees a glimpse of this woman who is comfortable in her sexuality while he’s lying there under her, seemingly vulnerable, as she takes him, uses his body for a change? Fuuuuck

Or how Engel feels in those rare moments when König is seconds away from crying, he's sniffling in her tits because of this or that trauma response or trigger, when König, this big, broad, controlling and protective giant is the one who needs protection and support?

She feels so out of her element and at the same time feels such a relief when the eternal masculine monument of power finally crumbles, even if just a little, and she gets to caress his head and soothe König during his breakdown.

Then back to their “preferred” gender roles they go, König clears his throat and Engel cooks another dinner, giggles in his lap while he treats her like a fragile little princess…

Gahh I want Engel to try on his hood and like choke him a little in bed or something while König looks up at her with the tiniest tinge of submissive adoration. Also, why can’t these two just be normal and work their way out of their stupid problems in a healthy way lol… (I wouldn’t have anything but wholesome fluff to write then would I!)

[anaurysm98]

god dude im living through so much good material for an essay about opression of queer identities in young adults that ill write in 20 years omfgggg A guy sat down next to me last month and told me, straight faced, after making an Auschwitz joke, he wasn't one of those racists and that everyone is the same no matter the race background, et cetera, but that those faggots should get murdered. Not that they should die, mind you, murdered. You see, I live in, no fucking joke, one of the cities with the highest LGBTQIA+ murder rates in the fucking PLANET. I CANNOT be sure this dude is bluffing, even more considering this guy is a white, cishet man who vocally supports the Alt-Right Option© in our country's shitty, radicalized but still unequivocally neoliberal capitalist political system. I'm scared. Not just for my safety or others' safety, but that even if I try my hardest, he isn't even gonna get reprimanded for it. Not a slap on the wrist, not a word spoken harshly. While I get called a faggot, under mutters, behind my back. And like, I don't know if I can just "let this go". I've talked about it with our high school counselor, but relying upon a school that recieves so much of it's funding from far-right supporting parents, in such a hostile city, this stupid throe for an ounce of sympathy feels more like screaming into the void than legitimately contacting an authority. The system is so rigged against any meaningful change in this deeply, deeply lead poisoned status quo that I'm forced to feel hopeless and either conform or inevitably die.

[mueritos]

Goddddd I'm transmasc, but I'm terrified of actually coming out because I actually like my "female figure", if that makes sense. It seems like I was fed so much transmed and terf-y ideals when I was younger that now I can't feel okay with identifying as trans without hating my body. I want to be perceived more masculine, but I also feel like what I'm comfortable with using (pronouns, even though I use mostly neutral ones, traditionally fem or masc clothes, etc) shifts overtime, and I don't want to be defending the labels that I use all the time, especially because I don't want to do top or bottom surgery, or start T (lots of people, mostly online, have told me to just call myself genderfluid, but I don't feel comfortable with that, and I'm scared of being called a trender or something)

I'm sorry for the ramble but I'm so sick of this, maybe this is silly or maybe I'm being completely unreasonable, I don't know anymore. Maybe I shouldn't be worried about how others perceive me like that, but idk. You can ignore this, but I'd also like to hear your two cents on this if you'd be comfortable with it

hey friend :) theres absolutely nothing wrong with how youre feeling or how you want to shape your body and identity. lots of trans people don't medically transition for all sorts of reasons, whether because of lack of access or because they dont want to. while I do think the community that is entrenched in colonialist ideas of transmedicalism are a minority (many are very baby trans people or have aged out of transmedicalist ideas), it is a very real threat in the sense that unfortunate movements have a way of ebbing and flowing into popularity.

that being said, there are SO many trans people open and willing and happy to accept you into the community. it is not your fault many people will incorrectly expect you to conform to certain expectations of gender. a large part of freeing yourself from these expectations is choosing a community that walks alongside you, not one that gawks at you. at the same time, we are forced to conform in certain contexts to maintain safety and access to resources. this forceful conformation is not your fault either. people will forever make assumptions about you, but it is your choice on whether or not you will continue choosing your freedom. this is not fucking easy of course when you exist under white supremacist systems.

youre also allowed to love parts of yourself others may not like about themselves. its not ur problem they feel those feelings. ive had strange comments thrown my way when I discuss how i experience connection and pleasure with my body, sometimes from other trans people. once you start realizing people are coming at you with their own baggage, it becomes a little easier to free yourself from their burdens. again, this isnt very easy when youre marginalized and expected a lot, some of those expectations being you people please.

only you have the clearest image of who you want to be. take baby steps, build your confidence, and find your people. you'd be surprised what a small yet understanding community can do for your confidence.

anyway, i wish u luck ^-^ feel free to message me again if you'd like more thoughts or want to vent. you're allowed to be sick of this, forever and always, but invest in yourself and your communities.

[saintsenara]

*rolls up in sexy nurse costume* i have those crack ships you ordered, doctor! extra strength unhinged.

firenze/narcissa malfoy

augusta longbottom/piers polkiss

colin creevey/the bloody baron

oh, you thought you ate with these, anon, but they're hardly unhinged at all.

firenze/narcissa malfoy

i wonder what returning to the forest would be like for narcissa in the years after the end of the war? it's the site of probably the most pivotal decision she will ever have made in her life - one which saves her son, but kills her sister; one which sees her family lose its status, humiliated by the ministry clearing house after the battle and dependent on the goodwill of harry potter to stay out of prison, but which still enables them to survive as a trio.

i seem to write, whenever i'm asked about narcissa, that she's clearly someone whose life is dictated by conformity to conventions - especially ones relating both to her gender and to her social class. with the end of the war, the mask behind which she has lived for decades is no longer available to her, and a woman who is clearly quite fragmentary is going to find herself trying to piece back together a person who hasn't been seen in public since narcissa realised she'd have to make up for bellatrix and andromeda's defiance by being a porcelain-perfect wife and mother.

and returning to the forest is going to stir up the same feelings in firenze. he was driven out for also making a knife-edge decision of huge consequence - agreeing to abandon the usual centaur policy of indifference to human affairs and working for dumbledore as the war ramps up - and which also results in a victory which is tenuous: he's absolutely right to recognise that there's a time for being hands-off and the government in being in the control of a genocidal terrorist kingpin isn't one of them; but, in being right, he ends up an outcast from his community, living as a second-class citizen in a society in which even the good guys think of non-humans as less worthy than themselves.

so you've got your forest-based meet-cute. you've got your central couple striving to come to terms with who they really are. you've got two people whose lives have been dictated by conformity to a set of social standards who no longer have the safety of those standards available to them. you've got a woman whose whole family are named after stars and a man [who is also a horse] who knows how to read the skies.

tell me you don't ship it.

augusta longbottom/piers polkiss

i've seen harold and maude.

colin creevey/the bloody baron

if you were adjusting to life as a ghost, having been brutally killed in a battle you shouldn't even have been fighting in, who would you want to show you around as you learn the ropes?

a forever-fourteen-year-old girl who literally doesn't stop whining

the world's most pompous partially-beheaded man [also fond of whining]

a mysterious and rude young woman who won't stop going on about how hot the man whose forces killed you was when he was sixteen

a drunken monk who represents the least interesting house and who's probably really into "looking on the bright side" and "manifesting", even though he's dead

or

5. an intriguingly blood-stained [always sexy!] anglo-norman nobleman who would help you tackle the big questions about regret and remorse and who could keep peeves away from you.

we all know what decision we'd make.

[kitkatopinions]

I kind of feel like it's funny when people hold RWBY and Blake/Yang up as some kind of super progressive height of gay representation that other media should learn from for a number of reasons, but the idea that "unlike other media, Bumblebee is never forced" is to me just.....

First of all

Like stop trying to throw other queer content that was fought for past insane amounts of censorship under the bus to try and make 'could've been way more queer from like day one' rwby look better. Like please tell me what queer romance in media you're talking about specifically, and explain why Bumblebee is inherently better.

But second of all..... We did watch the same show, right? "There's nothing forced about bumblebee-" Bro if you liked the scene where they kissed, more power to you. But the show writers literally decided to make the world around them randomly disregard like all other character conflicts and separate Blake and Yang from the group, putting them in a magical pocket dimension or something where their lives were in danger and the win conditions that would allow them to get out was them confessing their feelings for each other. There was literally "how do we take the next step" dialogue and then the two very awkwardly started forcing themselves to compliment each other (some of those compliments were straight up not true btw.) Prior to the kiss they started telepathically communicating with each other, somehow, and that was never explained or even treated as weird, and then the world around them conformed to their emotions enough to shove them together physically after shoving them together emotionally so that they could kiss, and sprouted flowers up around each other. And then that got them back to safety. And that whole time they were written to not even wonder what was happening to other characters or if they were safe. Again, this sort of thing did not happen to any of the other characters who needed to work out conflicts, not once in the whole season, despite the fact that we were led to believe it was a somewhat regular occurrence in Ever After that was supposed to happen with conflicts in general, and despite the fact that the whole reason the 'punderstorm' got created was because of a different conflict that didn't really get wholly addressed iirc. The 'punderstorm,' the bridge, the whole thing was pretty much just created so that the world and the writers could quite literally force Blake and Yang together on pain of death.

So it's cool that a lot of people really liked seeing the people they ship get together, but it's mind boggling that people saw it and thought "what a natural and completely non-forced way for them to get together! Other shows where people discuss past romantic histories or kiss after one person was worried about the other or have weddings or whatever need to learn from this super duper natural special gold standard of queer romance!"

Again, if other people liked it, great. And it was confirmation and rep so as bad as I might think it was done, every little bit helps to normalize queerness in media, so... Whatever. But like??? Idk why we're kidding ourselves here by calling it 'natural' or 'not forced.' The writers literally wrote the environment around Blake and Yang to force them to get together on threat of death. I couldn't think of any better example of a forced romance.

[soulkillerfm]

【 #### 𝚐𝚘𝚍𝚑𝚊𝚗𝚍_𝚜𝚎𝚌𝚘𝚗𝚍𝚍𝚒𝚜𝚌𝚒𝚙𝚕𝚎 ~~~𝟺𝟺𝟾𝟿𝟶 】

Identity:  UTP. Role:  The Second Disciple; The Fisherman.

They tell you to blend in, to conform, or on other days, they urge you to stand out, to be exceptional. As a child, it’s a paradox, impossible to understand who you should be in each fleeting moment, and more so, who they want you to become. But the truth, buried deep, was that they never truly wanted you at all. And so, in time, you grew weary of serving anyone, refusing to play their games, rejecting the very idea of bending to their will. At the Orphanage, they whispered your name with fear — you were the one who would fight the world. And so you did. A warrior, shaped not by their hands, but perhaps by forces unseen. You found purpose in the role you carved out of your own rebellion. Or perhaps, in darker moments, you wonder if it was a role they forced upon you from the start. Survival is a burden no child should carry, nor should the cold hands of cruelty, fear or hunger. Yet you learned to navigate it all, to rise above each challenge. You adapted, you endured, and you climbed, inch by inch, through the ranks. Giving when needed, but always taking more than what was offered. When the God Hand comes to you, it feels like fate. They named you the Second Disciple: The Fisherman, a title laced with irony, a mockery of the very faith so many clung to. But you did what you had always done — drawing in the "catch," the people you’d taken from time and again. Offering them deals they could never refuse. But this time, you weren’t alone. Now, there was power. And with it, finally, safety — a path you could carve in this heinous world. You would make them all pay.

𝙿𝚕𝚘𝚝 𝙿𝚛𝚘𝚖𝚙𝚝𝚜 & 𝚂𝚞𝚐𝚐𝚎𝚜𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗𝚜 【 ᴅᴇᴇᴍᴇᴅ ᴏᴘᴛɪᴏɴᴀʟ 】

1.  This position is yours by right, for you are truly the finest for the role. You will give everything, placing your very life on the line for the woman who saved you. When the day dawns and the conflict threatens her doorstep, you will rise as the soldier you’ve always aspired to be. Until then, you will remain ever at her side, steadfast and undistracted, a silent guardian in her unwavering light.

2. It’s hard to hold a heart when they’ve bruised it black and blue. Though there are glimmers of light, kind souls who wish for good, there are also those whose shadows swallow all in their path. They take the fragile — the children — and mold them into hollow shells, into creatures of fear and silence. But you, you are different. You stand as a beacon, determined to keep the light alive. To shield the innocent, to spare them from the crushing weight of the world’s darkness, and in doing so, to cast out even a small piece of that endless night.

3. You are more than mere might and terror; you possess a hunger for the divine, for moments of sanctity and ethereal grace. When you choose to guard such rare and precious things, it’s not your fault if men become daring and provoke your wrath. From your new perch, you provide for the hands that feed is your sole duty. Still you devour from those you find unworthy, your presence is felt, always aligned with your own personal sense of righteousness. You like the benefits that come with being deemed a monster, another whisper in single digit, something that isn't quite tangible.

𝙲𝚘𝚗𝚗𝚎𝚌𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗𝚜

THE FIRST DISCIPLE   The mother you never had, a testament to those rare lights that pierce even the darkest moments. Finding each other was nothing short of a miracle, and at times, you question if you deserve someone so good, so unshakably loyal. Your affection is never simple, often unspoken, felt deeply but rarely expressed. The Tax Collector is the one who found you, who gave you a new life — but back then, she wore a different face. Older. Still beautiful. More refined. You miss the person she once was, but even in this new form, she remains. And that, you realize, is all that truly matters.

THE THIRD DISCIPLE   You hold a deep-seated resentment toward both church and state. Religion never shielded you from the horrors of your childhood. Yet, you understand the role of The Preacher, even if your exchanges with him are laced with what you call "play." But beneath the surface of those words, everyone knows there’s a lingering spite. It’s a game, perhaps, but one woven with the threads of bitterness and unresolved scars.

THE FOURTH DISCIPLE  Once, you thought yourself in love — if that’s even the right word. You’re not sure it fits, not sure it ever did. Perhaps in the moment, it felt clearer, but now, it’s a distant memory, like a ghost you no longer fear. Whether you still feel that love is less important than the lingering question: have you forgiven them for pulling you close? For everyone knows, love isn’t made for the powerful. When you stand at the top, it’s all too easy to reach for things you know are within your grasp — yet love, true love, slips through your fingers like sand. But more than anything, it makes you weak. When they were "killed", the pain felt like too much. You know The Thief will be brought back into someone new. The feelings that linger in you make you feel disgusted with yourself. It cannot be your problem any longer.

THE FIFTH DISCIPLE   There’s a certain lightness in The Lamb, a carefree joy that tugs a smile from you, even as it burrows under your skin. You, who have never known the comfort of being "at ease," who’ve survived by moving moment to moment, day by day — it stirs something like envy within you. And yet, despite that small flicker of green, you find yourself captivated, unable to look away from the ease with which they navigate a world that never let you rest.

Suggested FC: Claudia Doumit Alternate Suggestions: None Former Appearance: N/A Current Status: Open

THESE SPECIFIC ROLES WILL HAVE A MORE IN DEPTH APPLICATION PROCESS !

[sarucane]

OFMD Spiral Parallels 38: Mad Devil Blackbeard

Intro: What I love most about how season 2 builds on season 1 of OFMD is the spiral narrative structure. Ground is repeatedly and explicitly re-trod from season 1 to season 2, but in season 2 everything goes deeper than season 1. Meanings are shuffled, emotions are stronger and truer, and transformation is showcased above everything. The first season plucks certain notes, then the second season plucks the same ones--but louder, and then it weaves them together to create a symphony.

---

Ed's core problem (he thinks) at the beginning of season 1 is that his image is more powerful than he is. It outrages him how inaccurate images are compared to who he actually is, and he feels trapped in something fundamentally inauthentic. He's not a devil, he's a man just like everyone else.

And then in season 2, his raiding outfit is a clear copy of that original illustration. He even references the caption:

And sandwiched in between this image and Ed's self-introduction as the devil is this.

Izzy demands that Ed conform to this image of Blackbeard. It's a more realistic image, but it's an image infected by death and destruction. There's a skull in his hand--and behind him, a ship is about to crack up on the rocks because it's heading right for a lighthouse. This print references Ed's deepest anxieties: his fear that all he'll ever be is the kraken, his pain at losing the safety of the lighthouse he and Stede made themselves into.

Instead of distancing himself from it, he embraces Izzy's demand that he forget the pain, and tries try to overcome his anxieties by drowning in them. By becoming the "scariest thing I ever saw--the kraken."

But all he has is charcoal and ink, and it smears easily.

And this is all about death, really. Chasing it indirectly, then directly, because he can't just be Blackbeard anymore. When Ed's beard grows back in, it's still gray. It doesn't actually matter how he feels about "Blackbeard," whether he wants the image to be true or not: it just doesn't match, and he can't force himself to be that. It's just a picture.

But there's something else about this imaginary uber-pirate devil that doesn't matter. Because that print that Izzy demanded Ed conform to appears one more time.

That image represents despair, the binding of Ed to death and monstrousness. And Stede, bless him, looks at it and crosses out "dead" to circle "alive." It's both an implicit acceptance of the image--Stede sees this and still loves Ed, despite its direct references to the things that Ed fears make him "unloveable"--and a rejection of it, Stede creating a small act of defiance against what's happened to Ed and how he's drowning in death.

Prints on paper, ink and charcoal--those are dead things. People are alive.

[iselsis]

The Point of Love Triangles

It's en vogue to hate on love triangles right now, and while a good deal of the criticism is deserved, I think people are missing the point of what a love triangle is meant for. A love triangle when used correctly is an extremely useful tool to show a character's growth, personality, and values.

The most important thing you can understand: a love triangle is the physical manifestation of a metaphysical crossroads and the focal character must make the choice. A question has been asked, and it must be answered. The focal character (the one everyone wants) can't go back to their old life, and now they're forced to make a decision on who they want to be going forward. The paths they can take (and the consequences of those paths) are shown by their love interests.

I'm going to illustrate with the classic love triangle: the new girl, the bad boy, and the good boy. Of course, it doesn't matter the genders of the characters or how many potential love interests there are, but this makes it easier to explain.

The New Girl (focal character) is thrown into a new world. The "New World" spectrum goes from literal (space travel/teleportation/pulled through time) to the figurative (new job/growing up/new school/rebuilding a broken life) with plenty of grey area in between (hidden secret society/new country/war). The New Girl is out of her depth and confused in this new world, and she's faced with dilemmas and decisions she'd never faced before. In a more life-focused world, this might mean choosing whether or not to play the power games everyone else in the office plays, choosing to leave a friend group she doesn't like or confront the others about what she doesn't like, choosing whether or not to go to parties where there are drugs and alcohol, choosing whether or not to stick up to a bully who is targeting her or someone else, choosing whether to follow her passion for the arts or the safe route of a stable job, etc. In a more action-oriented world, this might mean choosing whether or not she's willing to kill and for what, choosing to fight when she could choose to be safe, choosing forgiveness over revenge, choosing whether or not to use morally corrupt means to get power for what she thinks is a good cause, etc.

The two love interests should have contrasting answers to that question. This is why she can't choose between them: it's not that she isn't sure whose abs she likes more. She can't decide between them because she can't decide which answer is the right one. This does not mean that one of the love interests has to be evil/abusive.

The Bad Boy represents power. He doesn't follow the rules he doesn't want to, he's intense, he's persecuted by society, and he doesn't cave to social pressure. He wears his moral code on his sleeve, whether that's good or bad: he'll threaten violence on a bully, disrespect authority figures he thinks are wrong, and confidently advocate for what he wants. He puts his money where his mouth is and is willing to suffer for what he thinks is right, detention, write ups, physical pain. He wasn't just born this way: his strength comes from deep wounds and old hurt. He was weak once, and he knows the suffering that causes, and now he wants to keep anyone else from suffering the same way again. He doesn't just protect the New Girl, he empowers her. If the New Girl is being bullied, mistreated by an authority figure, forced to conform by her parents, wants to pursue a riskier life path, wants to protect people, or wants revenge, this attitude can look very attractive. Long term, though, this kind of personality can lead to difficulty getting/keeping a job, unnecessary trouble with authority figures, stubborn refusal to compromise/not realizing the other person feels railroaded, etc.

The Good Boy represents safety. He follows the regulations of society, he's laid back, he's diplomatic, and he's better attuned to how other people feel. Being law abiding doesn't mean he would follow bad rules, but he buttons his shirt, straightens his tie, and walks on the crosswalk only when the light says he can. He cares what people think and feel, and he tries to be something that they like. He can be susceptible to peer pressure, participating in activities he doesn't really like because he wants to make people happy, and bending the truth to avoid ruffling feathers. He also picks up on little things people like and remembers: he found out when New Girl's birthday is and brings her favorite coffee (he read her order on a receipt she dropped) and a cake pop (strawberry, to match the earrings she wears), he runs ahead to open doors for everyone (not just women/New Girl), he stays after a party to help clean up, and he's good at picking on things that bother people and steering the conversation away from those things. He's kind, stable, and sticks to what he knows works. If the New Girl struggles with anger issues or impulsivity, comes from a chaotic home life, wants peace and a steady life after the conflict, needs to learn forgiveness, or needs to learn to overcome a prejudice, the Good Boy shows what she could learn to be. He comes with downsides too, though: he avoids conflict, he can struggle to take a firm side because he can see both sides, he might value societal acceptance over defending the New Girl in a questionable decision, and his long-term goals might mean the main character would have to give up her wilder side.

Who the New Girl chooses isn't just her choosing a partner. It's her choosing a life and a set of values. This is why it's very important that she makes a choice. If you don't want her to end up with a love interest, keep in mind that rejecting both suitors will seem to the reader like she's rejecting both paths. Maybe she is rejecting both paths and forging her own path, but it will be hard to have her choose one of the two paths and but also reject the love interest who represents that path without undermining your message and her character arc.

Framing the whole love triangle around the moral ideals the characters represent makes plotting the whole story easier.

You know your New Girl needs to have a reason to like the Bad Boy, so she's persistently targeted by a bully and he not only defends her but builds her confidence and skill so she can defend herself.

You know your New Girl needs a reason to like the Good Boy, so he talks her out of trouble with an authority she offended and gives her a few tips on how to use tact and charm to her advantage.

You know you need a sweet scene with both, so you have Good Boy notice that she's been upset all day when no one else did, ask her about it when they're alone, let her be vulnerable, and comfort her.

For Bad Boy's sweet scene, she patches him up after he jumps into a fight to protect her, and when she says that she's not worth it and he shouldn't have gotten hurt just because she was too weak, he tells her that she is worth it and that she's stronger than she knows.

You need to show how both the love interests change her and how she changes them too.

New Girl in the beginning might harshly judge someone for their religion, social class, personality, or background because she's been mistreated by that person or by people like them before or because her side is in conflict with that side. After learning the value of gentleness and kindness from Good Boy, New Girl changes her mind and is kind/merciful to someone she previously disliked. After learning the value of protecting others, she defends that person from someone else.

New Girl might confront Bad Boy about how he hides his pain and feelings behind a mask of strength, which prompts him to share with her something he's never shared with anyone before: a secret passion like painting or music, fears he's always tried to hide, scars with a tragic background, etc.

New Girl might confront Good Boy when he chooses not to get involved in an argument she needs his backup in. He justifies himself by saying that he can do more good by staying in the good graces of the person she was arguing with, but she calls it cowardice. He takes this to heart and apologizes, and later does defend her in another confrontation.

If you want her to date both love interests before making a decision, you have her head a little ways down one path before coming to another crossroad and needing to decide whether to continue down that path or change her mind and go the other way.

For instance, she dates Good Boy, but when she goes to a high society party with him, she's disgusted by how fake everyone is and by the mask he puts on to blend in with them. New Girl has to decide if she values the connections and power that these social games can bring her or if she values living authentically at all times more.

Maybe she dates Bad Boy, but his rules don't apply to me attitude gets them both arrested and nearly charged with a crime. Worse, he doesn't seem to regret anything other than getting caught and starts planning to try the same thing again. New Girl has to decide if she wants to be someone who lives a truly high-risk life with the real consequences that could bring or if she wants to play things safer.

Maybe she dates both, breaks up with both, and then one or both of them makes a choice too. Remember, the focal character is a crossroads for the love interest too. Both of the love interests should change as people, not because "she can change him <3" but because they are dynamic characters just as capable of moral reflection and development as she is. Will the Bad Boy learn to deal with painful emotions with trying to hide behind anger? Will the Good Boy choose New Girl and the boldness she represents to him over social status with fake people?

You can also:

Add more love interests so long as those love interests also represent their own moral choice

Replace either love interest with a friend (make the New Girl choose between one friend or another, make her choose between a love interest or a friend group, etc.)

Replace either love interest with a job

Replace either love interest with a parent (make the New Girl choose between the values/culture of her family and the values/culture of a love interest)

[bread-and-roses-too]

I appreciate that there's been a pushback to pure choice feminism, it's important to acknowledge that no decision exists in a void. However, I worry when I see bullying towards women who conform to patriarchal standards in places that are considered "safe" for women, namely the west. I feel like things are neatly categorized into "feminist" and "unfeminist", so I want to remind people of something very important:

It is not "unfeminist" to conform to the patriarchy for safety reasons.

There may be a variety of reasons why being non-conforming to the patriarchy might be dangerous. Some women are required to wear certain dress in order to keep their jobs, like high heels or skirts. Losing a job can lead to a variety of safety concerns. In the same way, women in general are well aware of the fact that wearing makeup and nice, gender-conforming clothes makes you more likely to pass a job interview. Some women, like intersex women, trans women, and women of color, are more commonly targeted by accusations of being "fake" women and are more likely to face violence related to those accusations. They may go out of their way to conform to gendered standards of dress and action to avoid unsafe situations. There are also certain locations where not conforming to patriarchal gender standards is grounds for verbal or physical harassment. I live in a pretty Trumpy, confederate-flag-laden area, but people here tend to keep to themselves and not openly point out or threaten deviants to the "norm". This isn't the case everywhere in the U.S., and certainly not across the world. There are also highly religious areas and families where abuse might happen under the guise of "discipline" to women who stand up to traditional gender roles.

There are women in all of these situations who choose to fight the patriarchy, and those women are incredibly brave. In my personal opinion, acting as though this choice is obvious, safe, or even required belittles how much these women are putting themselves through. Fighting the patriarchy is neverending, it's tough, it can be dangerous. Honor those who fight and respect those who aren't in a place to take that risk.

If you're in a situation where it's unsafe for you to be yourself outside the patriarchy, I see you. You should not be silenced because of your desire or need for self-protection. Proclaiming, even if it has to be anonymously, that you're being forced against your will to conform to the patriarchy is so incredibly important for people to hear. There is a misconception, even among feminists, that the worst of misogyny is over in the global west. Your voice matters, sometimes more than the voices of those of us who are in safer areas less affected by misogyny. I hope one day we can help you find safety and peace.

[apaprocky]

A huge hit for freedom and democracy.

I often ask myself: How did Hitler’s rise to power even occur? Surely people are smart enough to recognize the telltale signs of vitriol and hate. Intelligent enough to understand the big-picture consequences of a leader with an agenda centered around apartheid. A leader whose policies will not only affect them but also their children, and anyone close enough to be touched by it.

The American Dream, it seems, has been confused for a nightmare—a nightmare better known as a fundamentalist free-for-all. No-fault divorce wasn’t even initiated until 1969; anything before that was considered the fault of the woman. Our grandmothers were beaten into submission and forced to stay, cheated on, humiliated, and still they had to march forward with their heads held high. Women couldn’t even have their own bank accounts until the Equal Credit Opportunity Act passed in 1974. Before then, the husband controlled the finances, and women had nothing.

I come from one of the first generations of women who didn’t grow up feeling the weight of gender roles and the pressure of societal conformity around our ankles and necks. I grew up believing anything was possible, that my potential was limitless, and that my gender wasn’t an obstacle stopping me from achieving the things I wanted to.

It wasn’t until I was much older that I began to notice the deeply embedded signs of misogyny around me. My generation of women was fortunate enough to be sheltered from the harsher realities those who came before us faced. We were allowed a certain blind naivety, an illusion of safety that our predecessors were not. We know what freedom is like; we’ve tasted it, and the thought that we may lose it saddens me to my core.

Hopefully, I am wrong. Perhaps we can look at the next four years as a minor setback—a detour, not a defeat. I know that one day a woman will be seen for her credentials, her achievements, and not the role society has set out for her. One day, a woman will be appreciated for her character and the wisdom she imparts, not vilified for her body parts. That day, sadly, is not today. It is not tomorrow. But it is ahead of us. We just have to be patient.

- my final thoughts on this election with a heavy heart and a glass full of Tito’s