#or they could js lay beside each other and look into each others' eyes

[escaping-peril12]

I am absolutely manifesting that Katsuki catches Izuku as he begins falling to the ground 😭🧡💚

[mxlti-fand0m-imaginess]

Insomniac // Tate Langdon

request: not sure if i already requested this butttt could you write tate langdon x reader w insomnia like him js comforting you n holding you in bed as you cry from exhaustion n frustration from not being able to sleep - or som along those lines of reader w insomnia? 💛

prompts: none

summary: no matter what you try, you just can't seem to fall asleep. your boyfriend, tate, tries his best to comfort you.

warnings: not proofread

word count: 512

a/n: i know this is shorter than what i usually write, but i've had some difficulty with motivation so i figured that i would at least try! i'm gonna do my best to write more. even though they might not be as long, i promise i will still put the same amount of effort it!

You groan in frustration as you roll onto your back, staring at the dark ceiling above you. It’s been hours of tossing and turning, hoping that you would eventually drift off to sleep. But the peaceful release of rest and dreams never came. It never does. Night after night you’d lie awake, wishing and praying to fall asleep for even a few minutes. Waiting and waiting for relief from this utter exhaustion that never seemed to come. 

Sometimes you were lucky, passing out from exhaustion after trying to fall asleep. You’d wake up in the morning still tired, but at least still able to function. However, with the way things were going tonight, it didn’t look like you were going to fall asleep anytime soon. You were completely drained, needing nothing more than a few hours of sleep. But despite how tired you were, you remained wide awake. And it just made you even more upset.

You sat up, reaching behind you to grab your pillow. Burying your face in it, you let out a frustrated scream. Before you realized it, tears were falling from your eyes. You clutched your pillow to your chest, sobbing in utter frustration and misery. Why were you like this? Why couldn’t you just fall asleep like everyone else did? Why did life feel the need to torture you so?

“Hey, what’s wrong? Why’re you crying?” a gentle voice from beside you said.

You didn’t even need to lift your head to know it was your boyfriend, Tate. You felt the bed dip beside you, a pair of comforting arms wrapping around you. He pulled the pillow out of your grip and you leaned against his chest, holding him tightly.

“Can’t sleep,” your voice muffled from your face being buried in his chest.

He frowned slightly, his hand rubbing your back softly. “Again? I’m sorry baby.”

You cried into his chest, all your pent up emotions spilling out. Tate didn’t mind. He didn’t say anything while you sobbed, just continuing to hold you as you let everything out. Your hands gripped the fabric of his sweater tightly, trying to ground yourself to him.

“Why am I like this? Why can’t I just fall asleep? It’s so easy for everyone else,” you whispered, voice shaking from your tears. 

“I don’t know, baby. I just wish I knew how to help you. It hurts me to see you suffer like this,” he replied, still holding you against him.

“You are helping, Tate. Just you being here helps. It makes me feel better. You make me feel better.”

He smiled, pressing a gentle kiss to your forehead. The two of you sat there in silence, just savoring each other's embrace. Soon, your grip on him loosened and your eyes grew heavy. Tate smiled down at you lovingly. He leaned back, laying down on your bed, pulling you down to rest on his chest, being careful to not move you too much.

Soft snores started emanating from you as you finally found the blissful release of sleep in your boyfriend’s arms. 

tags: @jamespotterslover @ahsxual @twinkiemaximoff @1800-fuckbitchesgetmoney @thatspookyagent @shadyspears @amourtentiaa @rottenstyx @tates-radio @hallecarey1 @im-verysad @tatesxthumbring @imaloserbabysowhydontyourailme @evilcr0ne @hocksetters @milly-louise @slut4kaiya @larawrrites

if your user is crossed out, it means i can't tag you!

[missblissy]

Human Alastor x reader playing Bowling? (Idk i just like that type of date hhaha) Maybe just them or maybe with friends

((>W>.............................. js I hate bowling. But I love you nonny, so for you..... I made this. ENJOY!! Sorry for the wait *cries*))

How goes bowling these days? Is that even still a thing? And why would anyone want to go bowling other than to drink? But no one drinks have the time... people just go for the pin and balls. Maybe it had to do with long and round phallic objects and balls rolling around. Regardless, your friends had dragged you to go bowling for whatever reason. And you decided to drag Alastor along because if you had to suffer, so did your boyfriend. It was also a bonus that he got along with your friends as well... some of them at least.

It was Charlie's idea mostly. She was someone who always wanted to go out and try new things. It was something she lived by apparently because this week's new activity was bowling at one of those dark neon allies with an arcade built-in. Charlie managed to talk her girlfriend, Vaggie, into coming too. Angel came because he also assumed there would be drinks but found out there wasn't a damn bar inside. You honestly had no idea how or why Husk was even there because he was completely and entirely miserable. If you had to guess it had something to do with you forcing Alastor to come.

Anyways, you and your little group of friends had found themselves staring down an alley with those silly little shoes on. Angel wouldn't wear his though, he wouldn't let their piss shade of yellow clash with his outfit.

You were sitting in plastic chairs next to Angel as you watched Charlie and Alastor go up next. You had two lanes so they went together. Angel sat next to you, he grabbed an arm behind you on the back of your chair and leaned in, "Five bucks says Allie gets the gutter," He whispered loud enough for Alastor to hear. You giggled as you saw your boyfriend's brow twitch and ignore the comment.

There was a second there that you were tempted to say something back to Angel but you were interrupted by the loud clash and computer saying "Strike!" You looked up and saw that Charlie was still holding her bowling ball. But walking away with a smirk on his face, Alastor's smug pride gleamed off him. The shock on everyone's face only made him boast to himself even more. When did Alastor find the time to get good at bowling.

As he sat down next to you, he threw Angel's arm away from you and replaced it with his own, though he was sure to wrap his fingers around your shoulder and bring you closer to him. He never liked Angel, and he was always so overly protective when it came to you anyways, so it wasn't welcomed that the boy was so close to you. Even if he was a guy. Competition is competition, it doesn't matter who they are, Alastor didn't like sharing you. Period.

"How... Did you do that?" You asked him.

Alastor shrugged and watched as Charlie threw her bowling ball right into the gutter, "I'm perfect at everything I do, dear." That was supposed to be satire.

Angel rolled his eyes and with a huff, he crossed his arms, "You can't fuck." He deadpanned.

Instincts kicked in and you ducked seconds before Alastor nearly climbed over you and punched Angel in the face. He missed and got him in the shoulder instead.

"Leave Alastor and his fuckless life alone," Husk said as he got up from his seat, "Some people are just better than the rest of us sexual deviants," He took his turn bowling soon after saying that. Vaggie went next as well. She choose to keep her mouth shut on all this.

But even Charlie had something to say, "Come on guys," She awkwardly waved her hands, trying to calm everyone down, "If you're going to fight take it outside this time. I don't want to get kicked out of another place of business..."

"He won't fight me, he'd know I'd deck him in the head and give 'em a one-two combo real quick like last time." Angel reminded everyone, and you all collectively remembered Angel clocked Alastor in the face at a bar after a heated argument. Alastor went out like a light and broke his nose on the way down. You looked at him and saw the little kink in his nose from that night.

You sighed and reached down into your pocket and pulled out your wallet. You grabbed a random twenty and handed it to Angel, "I'll give you this and two cigs if you go outside for ten minutes."

Angel gave you a snotty look, somewhat offended that you'd even offer such a thing. But he knitted his brows, snatched your twenty-dollar bill, and stole two cigarettes from the pack you left laying next to you on your seat, "I'm gonna find a bar on this fucking street- I'll be back later, losers."

You could still feel the rage simmer off Alastor even after Angel left. Though you didn't have time to say anything to him. It was your turn to go up. And now that Angel was gone, you didn't want to go up there and make a fool of yourself alone... Half your plan was to have Angel bowl next to you so that no one would notice how bad you were.

"Um-" You said as everyone waited for you to go, "I'd...uh... Um. I don't know hooow-" You were cut off as Alastor quickly got up and pulled you up with him.

He dragged you to the lane and got a bowling ball for you, "Hold this," He said. You noticed his anger from before had all but melted away. Alastor gave you a charming smile and stood beside you, "Copy me. Like when we dance."

You blinked at him a few times then did was he said. He held his hand up, pretending he had a ball. You copied him and did the same. He brought his hands to his chest, stepped forward, swung his arm back then forward again. You smiled at him and did the same, but you actually threw a ball. It rumbled down the lane and crashed into a couple pins. At least you didn't get the gutter.

"See? That easy," Alastor smiled at you. He place a hand on your arm and pressed a kiss on your cheek. He grabbed your hand in his and asked, "Do you want to see if they have any vending machines in the arcade? We can get some snacks?" Which was code for do you want to sneak away for a second?

"Sure," You quickly agreed while locking your fingers with his. The two of you scurried off with him. The second you were out of eyesight and safe behind a wall, Alastor gave you a more proper kiss.

He pulled away and asked, "Why did we come again?"

You shrugged, "Charlie asked." You simply said.

Alastor let out a huff then started walking with you towards the vending machines, "You can't really say no to someone like her..."

As you pulled out a few loose coins from your pocket and slipped them into the machine you laughed, "No, you can't." You both dearly loved your friendship with Charlie... But she could be a bit bossy sometimes.

The two of you collected an arm full of snacks and started walking back together, "Well, I say when we get home, we have a proper date."

You laughed and even lost a few snacks. You picked them up quickly and said, "You mean you cook us dinner and we watch a movie? That's not a proper date either, ya know."

Alastor smirked at you then nudged his arm into yours with a grin, "It is too because it'll be just us. Alone."

You rolled your eyes but still chuckled to yourself, "Alright, alright," You said, "What do you want to watch?"

He shrugged, "Don't care. I just want to make fried rice tonight."

You let out a huff of a laugh and passed out a snack to each of your friends while Alastor gave them a drink of some kind, "Fine. But I'm picking a TV show then because I just started watching something on Netflix."

"Aw, are you guys leaving?" Charlie asked with way too much sadness on her face.

"No, no-" You waved a hand slightly, "Alastor just doesn't think this is a proper date, so he has to make one up at home."

"What do you mean this isn't a proper date?" Vaggie threw a hand in the air, "All of us brought our partners! I mean- Angel left... So Husk is more like a third wheel at this point. This definitely counts as a group date or whatever."

"Call me old-fashioned, but you don't bring your friends on a date and there is no such thing as a group date," Alastor said as he cracked open a can of cola.

"What about a double date?" Husk asked from his seat while he tore open a bag of chips.

"This isn't a double date and even then those aren't real dates either. You're supposed to be somewhere nice, havea nice meal, share a few drinks. Share some stories and laughs with the one person you're interested in courting, then call it a night, done!" Alastor smiled to himself while everyone else collectively sighed. He was old-fashioned. (But you liked that about him.)

"This isn't 1955, Al. You can go on a date anywhere. Like here. What about going to the zoo? Could that be a date?" Vaggie asked.

Alastor thought about it, tapped a finger to his chin then gleefully said, "Nope! That's an outing!" Several people groaned but no one went on to feed into his banter.

You did hear Husk grumble under his breath "You need to go out to go on a date," But Alastor must have not heard it or choose to not say anything.

The rest of your night there wasn't that bad either. Angel did end up coming back, but not without his arms full of booze bottles of all kinds. They didn't serve drinks here but at least Angel was wise enough to buy some solo cups too. No one was really paying attention to the bowling anymore either. (You lost, not that you cared or anything.... You did.) Instead, you and your friends had gathered around in the arcade, drinking, laughing, playing games, and picking on each other harmlessly. You enjoyed every second of it, much to your surprise. Alastor did as well, though... He still insisted on his proper date once you got home.

[strangerfictions]

The Fight

 Request/ Prompt: so basically, I was tagged in the prompt in December by @1998--js​ and I knew I had to do it!

 Character A tilting Character B’s chin up to get a better look at their face and the evidence of the fight. A delicately thumbs away the streak of blood by B’s mouth, saying nothing as they examine it. After a brief pause, B’s heart skips a nervous beat as A looks them dead in the eyes. Their voice is quiet and tense, their anger barely restrained.

“Who did this to you?”

-  @whumpster-dumpster​

Summary: Rumors are spreading about you and Billy which leads to you both fighting. You have it out with the people who started it and Billy has to pick up the pieces.

Warnings: A bit of violence, lots of angst and fluff!

Words: 3416

A/N: So, I’ve been working on this for the past week or so and I am super happy with how it turned out. Thanks to @1995--js for tagging me in this prompt I loved it so much. Right now, things are very crazy since I’m back at college but requests are back open now for a limited time so if you have anything in mind send me an ask! I also want to thank everyone for 400 followers and for all the love on my shitty fics! Hope you enjoy this. Likes, reblogs and comments are all welcomed! Let me know if you would be interested in a part 2 of this!

 The Hargrove’s had moved in across the road almost a year ago and you still weren’t sure what to make of the California natives. You remember meeting the family for the first time and feeling very uneasy around Neil Hargrove. You would come to learn that you should follow your intuition a bit more.

Billy hadn’t left you alone since that day they turned up on your doorstep. Every day he would drop you home and you would talk about stupid stuff until you were both laughing at nothing. Of course, being friends with Billy had its up’s and downs. The first few weeks of your friendship a rumour spread around school that you were hooking up together which was far from the truth.

You both usually ended up arguing about a rumour every now and then and today was no different. You had brought up a rumour you heard being spread about you and Billy which made him snap at you about it like it was your fault it was being spread.

“Maybe if you weren’t such a fucking player you wouldn’t have rumours following you everywhere you go Hargrove but you seem to like that kind of attention so why would you even care” You hated that rumours followed the both of you just because you were friends. You both knew that Billy loved that kind of attention, but you didn’t enjoy it.

“So fucking what? Do you know how much trouble you cause me? I have been turned down by more girls around here because of you so I suggest you keep your mouth shut!” You were stunned by what he said but you were even more stunned that he was raising his voice.

“Pull over” You ask in a calm, steady voice.

“What?”

“Stop the fucking car Billy. I’m not putting up with you and your fucking shit anymore. If you want better chances with girls here it is. Don’t fucking talk to me until you respect me as a friend” As soon as the car came to a stop you get out slamming the door and walking down the path. You hear Billy’s car door open as you continue to walk away.

“Seriously Y/N? Get back in the car and stop being stubborn!” You walked towards your street throwing up the middle fingers at him as you left him standing beside his car.

You managed to get into your house before he passed you and once you were home you could finally let the emotions flow. Tears slipped down your face at a steady pace quickly but soon your sadness turned into anger as you paced around your room. Billy was one of your only friends except for Robin and so hearing him say things like that to you really hurt. You suddenly remember the party Billy had mentioned and you walk straight for the phone.

“Hey Robin! I’m going to that party tonight will you come please?...great come over here when your done…great see you in awhile!” You put down the phone and started to get ready waiting for Robin.  

After about an hour there is a knock on your bedroom door and Robins head peaks through the crack.

“Hey! Have you been crying?” Robin walks in placing her jacket on your bed.

“I had a massive fight with Billy over those fucking rumours going around about us. He said I get in the way of his hooking up!” You say dramatically as you apply some mascara to your lashes.

“Wow I mean that’s such a contradiction of what I saw today. He was with Tommy and Carol and he was having a pretty big fight with Tommy about spreading those rumours. I’m sure I heard him say that if he heard any more rumours about you that he would kill Tommy personally” You look up out of surprise almost blinding yourself with the mascara wand.

“Really?” You couldn’t believe it. Was Billy really going to lie about it all just to reclaim as much masculinity as possible?

“Yeah I mean it was pretty badass of him. I was going to call you later after work to tell you! It’s weird that he would lie though don’t you think?” Robin looked at you concerned as you cleaned up the mascara on the bridge of your nose.

“Yes, I do Robin but that’s Billy for you!”

You both finish up and walk to the party since it was only a few streets away. As soon as you get in all eyes are on you. You tug at the bottom of your dress suddenly feeling self-conscience. You spot Billy at the back of the room before Robin pulls you towards the kitchen to do shots.

You are on your fourth or fifth shot when you hear Tommy come into the kitchen.

“Well if it isn’t Billy’s little bitch!” You slam your shot glass down on the table hard smashing it in the process.

“What the fuck did you call me?” Robin is instantly trying to keep you back as you walk towards Tommy who’s suddenly looking very scared.

“It was a joke Y/N” Tommy tries to defend himself as you walk closer to him Robin still struggling to hold you back. Before you know it, you have hit Tommy straight in the face connecting with the side of nose. Before you can think Carol is on top of you trying to pull at your hair and a fight breaks out between you both. You manage to get Carol to the ground straddling her and punching her in the face but before you could get anymore in you are being dragged away by Steve Harrington.

“Let go of me Harrington! I swear to God I will…” Before you can finish your sentence, Billy comes into view. As he looks up, he locks eyes with you seeing the mess you are in as Steve drags you away from the kitchen. You suddenly begin to feel pain in your face as Steve lets go of you and walks away mumbling something about an icepack.

Billy walks through the living room to where you are sitting on the sofa and without saying anything, he sits beside you. He tilts your chin up getting a better look at your face and the evidence of the fight. He delicately thumbs away the streak of blood on your bottom lip, saying nothing as he examines you. After a brief pause, your heart skips a nervous beat as Billy looks you dead in the eyes. His voice is quiet and tense, his anger barely restrained.

“Who did this to you?”

You couldn’t look at Billy you felt so stupid for getting so angry over what Tommy said. You didn’t think you just did which you never do. You always think about things before doing them. You did the thing that you were always telling Billy off for doing when he turned up at your window with blood all over his face.

“I may have punched Tommy for calling me your bitch and then Carol attacked me I just got so angry and since I was already angry it just happened which is so hypocritical of me because I’m always telling you to think before you punch someone and now instead of me picking up the pieces it’s you which it shouldn’t be because I’m still mad at you” It was clear to Billy that you were going into shock and adrenaline was the only thing keeping you from feeling the intense pain of your face.

By the time you had stopped talking Steve returned with a bag of ice and a shot of vodka to “help the pain levels”. You take them both graciously thanking him.

“I can’t tell if you are stupid or a real badass” You feel Billy stiffen beside you as you half-heartedly laugh at Steve’s joke. Robin comes up behind him with a first aid kit handing it to Billy without saying anything.

“I ruined your night, didn’t I ?” You look at Robin who has a slight smirk on her face

“No, it’s about time you stuck up for yourself. It was going to happen to them eventually it was just a countdown to see who it would turn out to be. Clean her up before bringing her home please!” Billy nods in agreement and you say goodbye to Steve and Robin. You are both left in silence as they walk away. Neither of you knowing what to say to each other.

“You’re very quiet Billy. Are you okay?” You look up at Billy who refuses to even acknowledge you are talking. He quickly stands up causing you to get a little dizzy. The realisation of a probable concussion setting in.

“Stay here. Don’t move I’ll be back to help you clean-up” With that Billy storms off towards the kitchen probably to see the lack of injuries on Carol and Tommy. You were never a big fighter, but you had learned how to defend yourself at a young age. That kind of thing never really leaves you and so you instinctually knew where and when to punch. You lay your head against the back of the sofa closing your eyes and slightly grunting at the sudden pain searing through the left-hand side of your face.

You wanted to access the damage but knew better than to get up without Billy. You could feel blood dripping down your face potentially from your eyebrow. Your scalp was beginning to tingle as your adrenaline wears off. From the way Carol had a grip on your hair you wouldn’t be surprised if you had a few bald patches.

“You really got them good!” You open your eyes to find Billy standing over you with an impressed look on his face.

“Probably not as good as Carol got me though my head is killing me” Billy chuckles deeply as you wince in pain.

“No seriously Carol has a split lip, a bloody nose which might be broken and two very swollen and bruised eyes and Tommy…well his nose is broken and is bleeding everywhere…it looks like a murder scene in there.” You can’t help but feel like Billy is exaggerating but you knew better than that. Billy would never exaggerate about the results of a fight.

“I just want to go to bed. Can you help me clean up first?” You try to stand up but almost fall back down. Billy instinctually wraps an arm around your waist before you have the chance to fall back onto the sofa. He carefully helps you up the stairs, first aid kit in hand. This wasn’t something Billy was used to. He was usually the one with cuts and bruises littering his face not you. He wasn’t even sure if he knew how to patch you up properly. You were the one with all that knowledge.

Once in the bathroom he helped you sit down on the edge of the bath while he opened the first aid kit to see what he could do to help you. You watched as he opened the green box confusion written all over his face.

“You need help, don’t you?” You asked as you tried to get comfortable on the side of the tub.

“No let me figure it out. You do this for me all the time it’s the least I can do for you this time round” You laugh as he pulls things out to inspect them before placing them back in the box.

“Billy I would rather not be sitting here all night. I promise this isn’t some sort of defeat on your half just let me talk you through it” Billy sighs nodding his head as he places the first aid kit on the windowsill above the toilet.

“Okay first get a facecloth and soak it in warm water so we can clean the blood off, then you will  need some sort of alcohol or antiseptic if there isn’t any get a bottle of vodka from downstairs.” With instructions in hand Billy begins to move quickly around the bathroom. He sits on the toilet in front of you and starts to clean your face gently trying not to hurt you.

Billy reaches behind him to look for the alcohol but realises there is none so has to go downstairs for some vodka. When he goes downstairs you decide you want to get a good look at the damage done. You stand up from the edge of the tub and steady yourself on the wall. You carefully walk to the mirror hanging over the sink. You begin to survey the cuts and bruises on your face carefully. You check to see if you have any bald spots but luckily it seems Carol didn’t pull too much out.

“Are you sure this will work?” You jump glancing behind you at Billy who is standing in the door of the bathroom holding a full bottle of vodka.

“Well if it doesn’t, I’m sure if I down half the bottle it will have a desired effect” You sit back on the edge of the tub while Billy soaks some cotton wool in the vodka. Sitting back on the toilet he brings the soaked cotton wool to the large cut on your bottom lip. Gently he presses it against the cut soaking it. Your reach up to Billy’s hand and pull it away slightly as you feel the effect of the alcohol.

“Sorry” You mumble as you take your hand away from his.

“It’s alright at least we know it’s working. Here…for moral support” Billy offers you his other hand and you graciously take it as he continues to gently dab at the few deep cuts on your face. Once Billy feels like your face is sufficiently soaked in vodka, he throws the cotton wool in the bin behind him.

“Now what?” he asks turning around looking at you for further instructions.

“I think they should be fine until I get home. Thanks.” You look up to find Billy’s blue eyes focused on you. Your heart skips a little as he raises his hand and tucks a strand of hair behind your ear.

“That’s alright princess. Come on lets get you home” Billy helps you up for the tub and you both walk to his car. As you walk past the kitchen you catch a glimpse of Tommy and Carol who are looking worse for wear than you.

“I did tell you that you got them good. Here I was thinking you were incapable of punching anything!” You feel Billy’s grip on your waist get a little tighter as both Carol and Tommy look up at you both. Despite the fact that you just got beaten up you feel safe. Safe because of the arm around your waist.

As you both walk to Billy’s car you begin to laugh. The realisation of the seriousness of the situation setting in. You knew it was the mixture of drink and adrenaline causing you to feel this way, but you felt on top of the world. Was this how Billy felt after he got into fights? You slide down into the front seat of the Camaro feeling the pain creeping in.

“Why did you lie to me this afternoon? You acted like I was such a bother to you which I probably am, but Robin told me she saw you fighting with Tommy earlier and warning him about spreading rumours about me…us. If you really thought I was that much of a nuisance, why would you even bother saying anything to them in the first place. I’m just really confused about it all Billy.” You slouch down in your seat as you hear Billy sigh from his side of the car.

“Fuck…fine okay you’re not a problem you never have been. It was easier to make you think that than tell you the actual truth okay!” You watch Billy’s hands tighten on the steering wheel his knuckles turning white. Without warning he pulls over and turns the engine off.

“I don’t want you to say anything okay. I just need you to listen to what I’m going to tell you because everything is fucked anyways so might as well tell you. If you don’t like what you hear I will bring you home and you will never have to talk to me again…Y/N Y/L/N…I like you a lot and I didn’t want to tell you because there is no way a girl like you wants to date a mess like me and plus I really like our friendship and I don’t want to ruin that. You hate me, now don’t you?” You couldn’t wrap you head around what Billy had said so you stay silent looking through the windscreen in front of you. After a few minutes of silence, the engine starts again, and Billy is driving towards your house.

“I don’t hate you. I just…I think I have a mild concussion and so I’m not sure what to say” You glance over at Billy who has turned very pale.

“Fine” Billy huffs as you pull up outside your house. He refuses to look at you as you turn towards him. You reach out and place a finger on his jaw turning his head towards you.

“I like you Billy, but I’m concussed and need time to think so less of the mood. Can you help me inside?” Billy nods jumping out of the car quickly running over to your side to help you out. He helps you up and wraps an arm around your waist steading you.

“I like your arm around my waist it makes me feel safe” The concussion really starting to take effect. Billy walks you towards your front door as he listens to you.

“I also really like that you came over to me as soon as you saw I was hurt and how you brushed your finger over my bottom lip that was really nice Billy. I like this side of you. I like to call it soft Billy.” Billy hums in approval as you both stop at the front door. You fish your keys out of your denim jacket and hand them to Billy who pushed them into the door opening it wide so you can both get in without it being awkward.

“Soft Billy? I kinda like that princess. Need help getting upstairs?” You nod as you rest your head against Billy’s shoulder. You both make it upstairs without any further injury. You remain quiet well aware you have said plenty. Billy walks you into your room and helps you sit on the edge of your bed.

“You okay now? Need anything else?” You shake your head as you take you denim jacket off and throw it on the ground beside your bed refusing to change before getting into bed. You pull the covers back and slip into bed awkwardly.

“I’m going to get some pain killers and water for the morning princess. I’ll be back in a few” Tiredness hits you hard and you close your eyes as Billy leaves your room. He knows your house like his own and so it takes him less than a minute to find some pain killers and a glass of water. By the time he gets back upstairs he finds you fast asleep. He places the glass of water on your bedside table along with the pills. He notices that your blanket isn’t all the way up and so he pulls it up over your shoulders and tucks you in. Placing a small kiss on your forehead.

“Night princess”

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Read Part Two Here!

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  @an-antisocial-writer @charmed-asylum @takemepedropascal​ @technolilly​ @multifandomgirl16​ @dreamin-of-dacre​ @1998--js​

[chocolatemillkk]

Intensity JS-wip

“We’re dating each other.” Y/N bursts into my room. “Okay? You’re my date.”

“Who-“

“Byron let me in,” she explains before I could ask my question.

“Why-“

“Long story or short?” She plops herself onto my bed and falls back, grabbing a pillow to scream into.

“Is that the short story?” I chuckle as I go back to folding my laundry.

“Long story it is. So you know how going back home for the holidays is always such a pain because my extended family is a pain in the-”

“Yeah-“ I try to get in but she cuts me off.

“And remember I’m always forced to face my ex-the one I dated for two bloody years and who dumped me for my cousin?”

“You’ve mentioned about a million tim-“

“So this year my mum invited that little bitch to ours for Christmas dinner because her parents are travelling the world or some shite and she has no one for Christmas dinner. But here’s the kicker! Turns out she’s still with my ex and they’re engaged now...”

I listen, amused at how fast Y/N zooms through her story. She’s equal parts angry, stressed, and already convinced I would say yes.

“So in order for me to keep the sliver of respect I still have, and not to look like a complete loser who hasn’t held a steady boyfriend since...well...since him. I need to bring a boyfriend home. I thought about bringing home a girlfriend just to freak everyone out-you know...but none of my friends were up for it. They already look at me weird because I do Youtube for a career but-“

“Y/N,” I push my clothes aside and jump onto the bed to push her down. She goes down with a shout and I kneel over her. “Shut up will you? I’ll bloody come as long as I’m back in London by Sunday.”

“Oh you will. Dinner’s Friday and we’re leaving right after!”

“You’re mad you know that?” I shake my head and she delivers a foot to my stomach. I lose my balance and come crashing down onto the bed beside her.

“You’ll see why I’m so mad when I take you home.” Y/N scrubs her eyes.

“I’ll finally ask your mum if she dropped you on your head as a child,” I say, pushing Y/N’s buttons even more. I get the desired response-a string of swear words before she bounces off the bed.

“Now I have to go look for a dress that’ll make me look uh-mazing,” Y/N pauses by my door. “And I’ll pick you up Friday at 3.”

“Alright,” I sit up in bed. “And Y/N?” She turns to look at me, her cheeks flushed and mind whirring, a million miles away. “I don’t think you’re a complete loser.”

I manage to pull her back to the present as she focuses on what I’d just said. She rolls her eyes and sticks up her middle finger before leaving but not before I see the smile grace her face. I lay back down on the bed with the same smile that she never failed to leave me with.

•••

Y/N and I were complicated but at the same time we weren’t. We’d met on New Year’s a few years back and after a flirty night we somehow decided to stay friends. Somewhere along the way we became inseperable. But sometimes I wondered what would have happened that night if I did work up the courage to kiss her like I wanted, or if I asked her out on a date the next time we met instead of asking her if she wanted to join the boys and I for brunch.

Y/N was fierce to the outside world but I knew the softer side of her. The one she allowed me to see after many vulnerable drunk conversations and road trips we often took alone. She was my partner in crime and I was lucky she’d picked me to talk to that New Year’s Eve.

I sit in the passenger’s seat of Y/N eco friendly car-a spot I was so familiar with the seat probably had an imprint in the shape of my bum. Christmas carols play softly through the stereo but I can’t focus because Y/N continues talking through them.

“So not quite a year but almost,” Y/N tries to get our fake history right.

“How about we say we made it official at last New Year’s so it’s easy to remember?” I suggest.

“Oh you’re genius,” she grins a toothy grin. “Yes-oh by the way Josh was telling me about the costumes you ordered for that video? When’s that happening?”

We get side tracked talking about work and by the time we pull up to Y/N’s childhood home, she’s less anxious but its not completely gone. I manage to get her out of the car and hold her her hand as we get to the front door. Her mum opens, trying to hide her shocked expression at my presence but reassuring me she has plenty of food. Y/N’s younger sister barely spares me a glance from her phone, already decided years ago that I was weird after walking in on Y/N and I trying to eat cupcakes without our hands (in all fairness it was for a video). Her dad welcomes me warmly and we’re all sat in the sitting room when the doorbell rings.

“Oh that’s probably Eve and Jim!” Y/N’s mum gets up to get the door.

“Wonderful,” Y/N glances at me and then says something to her sister which sets her off laughing.

Y/N •••

“Y/N,” my cousin sounds scandalized as she observes Joe. “Is this Joe?”

“Yeah,” Joe’s hand circles my waist answering before I could. “Nice to finally meet you.”

“I didn’t know you two were dating,” she eyes our posture and wraps her hands around Jim’s waist. Her fiance. Gross.

Jim greets Joe wearily and glances at me before deciding to concentrate on the Christmas tree. I’m better off without him, I remind myself. Eve and him were a better couple anyway. I had moved on to better things. He wasn’t even that great.

“Yeah we are,” I find my voice. “Joe and I. We’re...in love! Right?”

“Very much,” Joe smiles at me but his eyes are teasing me so I avoid looking into them in case I start laughing again. He made it very hard to stay serious.

“That’s so cute!” Eve says before moving on to greet my sister. I roll my eyes to Joe before we take our seats which happen to be right across from the vacant seats Eve and Jim were going to take. I’m grateful for Joe who wraps his arms around my shoulders and keeps me comforted until dinner. He knows exactly what to do and say to make it believable, even pecking my cheek when Eve asks our first date story which he pulls out of his arse. He deserved an Oscar. I would tell him after.

Joe •••

“So Jim,” I say halfway into dinner. He didn’t speak much but I wanted to know the guy who was Y/N’s firsts. He didn’t seem much her type but I figured there was more under the surface. “What are the plans for the wedding?”

“It’s a summer wedding,” he says slowly. “I thought autumn would be nice but Eve didn’t want to risk bad weather and whatnot.”

“Not just bad weather,” Eve cuts in and begins detailing her wedding plans which Y/N kicks me under the table for starting.

“You see you two going that way?” Jim asks me after a while as Eve continues to explain to Y/N her bridesmaid dress.

“Y/N and me?” I ask, caught off guard.

“Yeah,” Jim laughs, raising an eyebrow. “I can see the way you two look at each other. And she’s a great girl.”

“Yeah...you would know,” It’s easy to slip in my question. “She’s kind of close lipped about what happened with you two...?”

“Really?” Jim glances at Y/N almost like she scared him. “That doesn’t sound like her.”

“Guess not,” I force a laugh. The truth was Y/N went on many rants about how unreliable men were and I knew that was due to Jim, she’d told me vaguely he broke up with her and started dating Eve a few weeks later. But never the details.

“We were young and-“ Jim hesitates and glances at Y/N and then back to me. “She was always a little intense you know? It was just...a little much for me.”

“I think she’s perfectly intense,” I feel myself getting defensive and Jim catches it too.

“Who’re you calling intense?” Y/N says at the same time, her eyes burning...well...intensely.

“Uhm,” Jim shakes his head. “Just talking to Joe-“

“You.” I say. “I was saying I loved your intensity.” Y/N stares at me suspiciously, trying to read whether I was lying or not. “It’s part of your charm.”

“Y/N’s charm is scaring everyone away,” her sister comments and Eve laughs.

“Shut up idiot,” Y/N stares daggers at her sister but she just shrugs.

“Well it’s sort of true,” Eve gloats. “In secondary everyone eventually stopped hanging out with you because you scared them all away.”

“Or maybe it’s because you always bitched about me to anyone who listened,” Y/N bites back but her voice shakes.

“Language,” Y/N’s dad warns.

“Well hey, I’m still here,” I interrupt and grab Y/N’s hand to hold, hoping to change the subject around.

“Yeah that’s cause you’re...weird. Like Y/N.” Her sister eyes me.

“Hey,” Y/N’s mum scolds everyone but I mouth a thanks to her sister and she rolls her eyes. She looked just like Y/N. “Let’s not have this conversation right now please. Eve your plate’s empty would you like seconds?”

“Yeah Eve,” Y/N spits. “Want some sloppy seconds?”

Eve’s mouth drops and Y/N’s parents scold her as her sister giggles.

“So mature,” Eve crosses her arms. “No reason to stay jealous Y/N.”

“Why would I be jealous of pathetic Jim over here.”

“Y/N!” Her mum scolds.

“Y/N you’re-“ Jim starts.

“Shut up!” Y/N cuts Jim off and I almost feel bad for him. “You don’t deserve to talk. Not to my face, in this house.”

“Well you better get over it,” Eve cuts in. “You’ll be seeing a lot of him since we’re getting married and all. He’ll be around for a while.”

“Lucky for you-no competition-your only other available cousin is underage.”

Y/N’s sister’s jaw drops and the table explodes around us. I figure Y/N had taken it too far but she’s already stomping away before I could reach for her. I leave the noisy table and find her exiting the front door. I grab her jacket and make my way outside.

“Do you still like him?” I ask after I hand her her coat. I don’t know why I ask. But it’s suddenly important for me to know.

“Ew gross, Sugg. I thought you knew me better.” Y/N glares at me.

“I do. I’m just wondering why you’re still upset after all these years. You don’t have feelings for him so-“

“I don’t know!” Y/N turns away from me. “I just hate seeing them together. It just hurts! It reminding me every time I do how I was such an idiot, it reminds me of the shitty time I had in secondary, and how Eve always wins at everything. Even my parents take her side over mine even though they clearly see everything she put me through! Jim dumped me because Eve talked bullshit about me all the time and complained to him constantly. He never minded I was so intense but suddenly he was scared away directly into her arms-“

“So fuck him!” I grab her shoulders.

“I already did!” The words fly out of Y/N’s mouth, and she tries to stay angry but her face cracks and suddenly she’s laughing. “Jesus he lost his v-card in the bedroom above from where he sits. I wonder how Eve feels about that.”

I laugh, relieved that Y/N had run out of her rage.

“Y/N,” I tell her. “You’re not scary or a loser. There’s nothing wrong with your job or you intensity. You’re perfect.”

“Is this where we kiss?” Y/N raises her eyebrow.

“No mistletoe,” I look above us.

She rolls her eyes but I glimpse a smile as she looks down. “Want to walk down to my old school? Where nobody liked me?”

“Yeah,” I button my coat and grab her hand. “I’ll beat up all the fake bullies.”

“You don’t have to hold my hand out here,” she looks down at our clasped hands.

“Keeps us warm,” I kiss her forehead and we’re off. She tells me stories from school and I imagine her here walking these streets as a kid. I finally get the full Y/N story by the time we reach the playground. We pause in front of the front entrance and she gazes up at the building. Suddenly, she turns to me and closes her arms around my shoulders, burying her face into my neck.

“I’m sorry for dragging you all the way out here for this shitshow and wasting your Friday.” She says close to my ear. I ignore the shiver that runs through me and wrap my arms around her waist.

“It was fun,” I tell her. “I liked the look on your cousin’s face when you asked her about your sloppy seconds.”

Y/N giggles into my neck before facing me. She grows serious as she scans my face this closely. “I never actually asked anyone else to be my fake date.”

“Hm.” I let the information sink in. “So you wanted to lure me out here all by myself.”

“Sort of,” a mischevious smile plays on her lips. “You got a history lesson out of it.”

“The only one worth paying attention to,” I say just as she tugs my sleeve and is off running towards the staircase leading into the building. She stops at the side, and stands there with her back against it.

“I never asked anyone to be my fake date because I wanted you by my side,” Y/N watches me intensely as she tells me what I already knew, but her confirmation gives me the only push I needed.

“Well,” I step forward, closing the distance between us and her breath catches as she looks up at me. “It’s good. I wouldn’t have wanted any other fake date to be able to do this.”

I lean down and her eyes are already fluttering close as I press my lips to hers and just like everything about her, it’s intense and passionate and entirely electric.

“Why haven’t we done that sooner,” she asks against my lips when we part but my senses are too jumbled to form a sentence. It didn’t matter we hadn’t done it sooner, I pull her into me to kiss her again, it was perfect the way

[tbr-agency]

too fast.

summary ⟶ Jackson and Chaeun had their last minute planned date before Chaeun leaves Korea for 5 months.

timeline ⟶ October 2019

characters : Ji Chaeun (The Bloody Roses), Wang Jackson (Got7)

❝ I can’t stop you, can’t I? ❞

Jackson sighs, for how many times he couldn’t keep track. 

He was in his girlfriend’s new shared house, in her own room, laying down on his girlfriend’s bed at the same time waiting for her to finish getting ready for their short last-minute planned date.

At the same time, he was admiring how aesthetic his girlfriends’ room was decorated. Everything was black and white, which is also his favorite color.

The bathroom door opens to reveal Chaeun wearing jeans and a normal white-shirt, her hair still wet. Jackson quickly sat up, going towards the dressing table.

“Baby, let me help you dry your hair. Sit down!” Jackson was already holding onto the hair-dryer without even hearing Chaeun’s response, his free hand grabbing onto Chaeun’s arm as he pulled her towards the chair of her dressing table.

Knowing it will be that last time that they will be seeing each other, Chaeun didn’t even protest as she just watches Jackson blow-drying her hair, his eyes were too focused as he looked to the mirror then towards her hair.

Chaeun still remembers the time when she had to tell him. She never felt so nervous when she had to tell Jackson that she would be leaving abroad. 

She was afraid of his reaction.

“5 months?” Jackson mumbled, his eyes moving as he read the letter of acceptance from CIA university. Chaeun watched him and his face visibly fell as he went pale.

Jackson looks away from the paper, it was obvious he was in a state of shock. He knew this is one of the thousands obstacles he is going to face if he is dating someone working under the law enforcement.

His eyes started to get teary, it was the exact feeling that he has to be away from his parents for the first time.

Chaeun immediately saw his eyes begin tearing as she quickly took the paper away from his hands, holding onto his hands tightly, peering onto his face. Chaeun couldn’t even get her words out, it would be insensitive of her to say it was only a few months.

“I can’t stop you, can’t I?” muttered Jackson, his eyes moving towards Chaeun. She could only sigh, looking away from him. 

“I will call you every night, I promise.” Chaeun reassured. 

Jackson wanted to protest, but he already made a promise to her, to each other that they have to trust each other, and so far they did. This was a huge obstacle for Jackson.

He let out a sigh, looking directly at her, letting out a small smile before planting a kiss on her cheeks.

“Yes please,”

“Oh my god. You look so pretty,” Jackson smiled widely as he looked at Chaeun with adoration through the mirror, earning a slight blush from her. She quickly stood up, facing him.

“Thank you.” Chaeun muttered, staring into his eyes and somehow, she felt sorrow. 

She never felt this way before. 

But ever since being in a relationship with Jackson, he clings onto her and whenever Chaeun jokingly refuses, he would find ways to be with her, holding onto her hand 24/7.

There was never a day that Chaeun wouldn’t laugh. Jackson would always tell her about his day, random and funny things that happened during the day. 

Chaeun loves to hear him rambling, ranting, telling her stories of his daily life because it was interesting to her and she finds Jackson adorable as she spends more time with him.

Jackson was like a happy pill to her and knowing that he wouldn’t be by her side, it would be the most boring 5 months she had to endure.

“Princess? Baby? Chaeunnie?” Jackson snapped his fingers in front of Chaeun as she was in a daze, earning a chuckle from him, his hands traveled to her face, pinching her cheeks.

Chaeun’s eyes moved towards him. 

“Right.. Sorry - c’mon! We’ll be late!” Chaeun let out a smile as she quickly grabbed her belongings, at the same time pulling Jackson along with her before they exited the house together.

Chaeun was on high alert whenever they were in public. 

She still reminds herself and sometimes to Jackson that they should keep PDA to a minimum since their relationship hasn’t been revealed, yet.

But Jackson will always have his way on holding onto Chaeun’s hands or holding onto her arms, locking them with his.

The couple decided to go to every shop, buying stuff for Chaeun since she is going abroad. 

But Chaeun would turn down some of his offers because the boy isn’t aware of the price. Even when Chaeun told him about how pricey it is, his usual replied would be “You are much more expensive than this,” and Chaeun can’t help but to sigh.

Chaeun has no choice but to go along with him after seeing him become sulky and pouty.

But Chaeun will speak up if it’s too much.

Thankfully, it was time for them to head towards the location where Got7 is filming for their new comeback music video. 

Ever since they step into the car, Jackson suddenly went quiet and Chaeun knows why he has become silent.

Her free hand traveled towards his hands, her thumb rubbing on top of his hand as if to cheer him up. Chaeun didn’t want him to be sad or upset, she didn’t want to see him like this as her last time being with him.

Jackson turned towards her, her eyes were focused on the road but she could see his changed expression on the corner of her eyes. His smile slowly widens, Chaeun feeling his fingers intertwining with hers.

As they reach the venue and the both of them getting out of the car, Jackson holds onto Chaeun’s hand as they went into the set to see JYP staffs getting ready as they were preparing the props for the venue and Chaeun saw some of the stylists carrying multiple of their designed clothes.

Chaeun turned towards Jackson as he was coolly sipping onto his coffee looking around the set. They had less than 30 minutes left before Jackson had to go in.

Jackson took out his phone as he began to take pictures of Chaeun, as he was making it really obvious.

“Jackson, what are you doing?” 

“I’m taking pictures of you. Just be yourself. It’s a candid style,” answered Jackson as his eyes were focused onto his phone while sipping onto his coffee.

Chaeun chuckled as she shook her head, grabbing on his arm as he dragged him to go into the venue, Jackson still taking pictures of her.

Once they entered the set, Chaeun looked at her watch, and it was time for Jackson to leave soon.

“Baby, don’t look.” Jackson voiced out as she looked up to see his eyes gazing onto her watch too. 

She could see him trying to hide his sad face. Chaeun instantly let her arm fall on her side, putting her right arm that has her watch at the back of hers.

Both of them were being silent for a minute and it broke by Jackson sighing and engulfing Chaeun into a tight hug.

“As much as I want you to be with me, I know this will be beneficial for you if you take the courses, you will get your master’s degree. I’m so proud of you, Chaeun-ah.” admired Jackson as his expression softens, his free hand cupping her cheeks.

Chaeun smiled warmly as she suddenly remembered something. 

Her hands went towards her jean pockets, earning curious looks from Jackson, seeing his girlfriend looking a little panicked.

Chaeun’s smile widened as she finally found what she was looking for. She took out the bracelet that she custom made for Jackson, as she showed it to him.

Jackson’s eyes widened as he looked towards Chaeun then pointing to himself.

“Is this for me?!” Jackson exclaimed and Chaeun nodded, grabbing his right hand as she quickly put on the bracelet for him. 

“It’s custom made because I wanted the design to be similar to my family. They are the initials of my parents and brother’s name.” Chaeun showed her wrist towards him, seeing 2 bracelets, that had different colors. 

It was obvious that one of them represents Jackson since it has the letter ‘JS’ on it and it was in colored black, while the other one has 3 initials and the color of the string is dark red. 

“Aww, baby. So sweet!” Jackson cooed, his hand clutching onto his heart dramatically and Chaeun rolled her eyes.

“Jackson! Please be in the stylist area now!” A voice called and both Jackson and Chaeun looked towards where it came from to see one of the staff looking a little frustrated.

Jackson turned towards Chaeun with a slight pout. 

“I’m not going to say goodbye because it isn’t.” Chaeun shrugged as she leaned towards Jackson for a hug. 

She can't help but giggle to feel Jackson’s heart beating a little too hard and fast.

Her eyes shifted towards him, as it then moves towards his lips and Chaeun decided to make the first move by crashing her lips towards his and to feel Jackson’s hand cupping to her cheeks, at the same time reacting to her kiss by leaning forward.

Chaeun quickly pulled away to see Jackson’s lip pouting and she was lucky to pull away before things escalated quickly and besides they are in public. 

She can't help but to chuckle, then letting out a smile.

“I’ll watch your comeback every day!” cheered Chaeun and Jackson nodded. 

“Text me again later,” Jackson reminded and Chaeun nodded, gesturing to go before he gets reprimanded by the staff. 

Jackson’s steps felt heavy, and he didn’t have the heart leave her behind knowing she was leaving Korea as soon as she stepped out of the location, in about a day.

“Jackson-ah!” Chaeun yelled and Jackson quickly turned behind, his eyes locked with hers.

“I love you!” Chaeun yelled as she waved her hands.

Jackson bit the bottom of his lips, as he slightly turned towards the staff who were somehow talking among themselves.

He decided to use this chance to run towards Chaeun as his hands automatically reaching for her cheeks, cupping it and it was his turn to crash his lips onto hers.

Chaeun’s eyes widen twice to feel that this time, the kiss was rough and needy. She knew exactly what Jackson was feeling as she followed Jackson along, letting Jackson’s tongue enter her mouth.

Jackson pulled away as he embraced her one last time. This time, it was a feeling of love and trust. 

Couldn’t bear to look at her face, Jackson walked away as he slightly looked towards her, waving at her.

For the first time, Chaeun smiled brightly even though her loved one walked away from her but she knows it was the only way before the feeling turns into longing.

masterlist : Got7 Bodyguard Au

[tnystrk-exe]

Home 9

Tony Stark X Reader

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 End

“You can’t just do those kinds of things, Tony!” Pepper seethed. Embarrassed and angry beyond compare.

She moved to walk away but Tony caught her by the elbow with a loose grip. “Pep, I’m sorry. We seriously crossed a line, I understand.” He could still taste your drink on his lips as he lied, “The kiss didn’t mean anything.”

His heart was still pumping full speed. Like the last time, you left him wanting so much more than you gave him. All he needed to do was to have you close for a while. To his disappointment that wasn’t in the cards. It all just felt more than one sided at times. You never picked up on his signals and if you did you seemed to just think it was a joke. So he sealed his fate away. “I’ll do anything to make it up to you.”

“Boundaries.”

“...Tell me what you want and I’ll make it happen.”

-

Things between you and Tony were more friendly since Christmas. It was weird. After years of your friendship being a certain way, it had been turned on it’s head. You missed him even when he was right in front of you. Still, as much as you wanted to, you couldn’t bring yourself to regret the kiss. His favorite scotch and the smell of his cologne were enough to make you dizzy at times.

Both of you were just a mess around each other to say the least.

He still went though his new processes. There weren’t anymore of your famous sleepovers, he’d always knock out on the couch or the room that was mostly reserved for Rhodey. The both of you stayed at arms length. He didn’t quite realize how much he’d miss how the smell of your perfume would stick to him after being with you or wiping off your annoyingly resilient lipstick from his cheek after visits. You’d miss your stolen moments when he’d come from no where and keep you close to him, refusing even the idea of letting you budge a millimeter or his gentle singing when a nightmare would keep you up at night.

Though you were grateful nothing really changed for Ro. Everything that changed stayed strictly to the two of you.

-

“But daddy!” You heard the six year old complain, “You forgot my training wheels!”

“Sometimes you have to hit the ground running, Rugrat. That’s just the way things go.”  He tightened the last bolt on the bike and set it upright.

“No!” She stomped, crossing her arms over her chest. “Can’t make me!”

The two of you shared a look, as nicely behaved as she had been, recently it just took a turn with tantrums. She hadn’t been immune to them before, not by a long shot, but they happened a lot more frequently.

“Sweetheart, why don’t you just get on your bike and try?”

She chucked her helmet on to the ground and dropped to the floor with it, deciding a show would probably get her what she wanted. “Mommy and daddy don’t love me!”

“Hey, get up. You’re too big to be acting like that,” you scolded, over chants of ‘don’t love me.’

Tony grabbed Ro and set her back on her feet. “Listen to your mom. This isn’t something to freak out about anyway.”

She swatted her hand at Tony’s arm. “Leave me alone! I want my training wheels!”

“No. Now you don’t get to learn at all. Go to your room, no toys.”

“No sweets and you’re going to bed early,” Tony added in his punishments.

“I hate you!” She ran into the house slamming the door, another slam following soon after.

Tony dropped onto the picnic blanket beside you, “Whats gotten into her? I thought year two was the hard one.”

You shrugged, “Equally as frustrated, maybe it’s just a phase. Could just be upset you’re going away for a while.”

“Oh?” He raised a brow, popping a couple of blueberries into his mouth, “It’s my fault now?”

“I’m just trying to figure out what changed Tones,” you raised your hands in surrender.

“There’s also you taking more shifts than usual.”

“You’re one to talk about working...Okay, so we both need to pay her more attention,” you settled.

“Family vacation after I come back from New York? Us, Rhodey, and Pepper?”

“When Ro has one of her week breaks. I don’t want her missing too much school.”

“School,” He scoffed, “Just grab that weeks work and we’ll teach it to her.”

“No. You can teach her how to ride her bike.”

“You told her not today.”

You shrugged, “You’re going to be gone for a while. She just needed a punishment for hitting you and that’s the first thing I thought of.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah. Just give her a minute and let her calm down. But she shouldn’t get to have her toys or sweets after all and she should still go to bed early.”

“Whatever you say.”

You sighed, covering your face with your hands as you moved to lay down. His constant snark was wearing you down. “Tony, can you change it up? Even in the slightest? I’m trying to be civil here and you’re coming at me for no reason it seems like. At least tell me what I did wrong.”

“You didn’t do anything.”

Another clipped answer. You got up and went into the house. He was being annoying and you just needed time away. Checking up on Ro, she seemed to have fallen asleep after crying. Taking off her knee and elbow pads, you covered her up with a blanket. Going to the kitchen, you started to cook, needing something to do that was mindless and simple.

“ I thought we were having PB&Js for dinner?” He said, coming in after 30 or so minutes.

“If you still want to, be my guest. There’s chicken Alfredo if you want some,” You answered, absentmindedly twirling your fork in the noodles.

“Thanks.” He poured out some of his scotch, grabbing another cup, “You want some too?”

You scrunched your nose, “Don’t have the taste for that anymore.”

He made a confused face at you. “Since when? We used to always sneak this from Howard and you drink it every time you steal my drinks.”

“Want me to have a drink with you? Fine.” You went over and grabbed the rum. Pouring out your shot you downed it quickly. “There, we had a drink together.”

“I get it, I should just fucking go. Shouldn’t I?”

“You know where the door is, don’t you?”

“Well, when you’re showing it to me so damn graciously.”

“No. Don’t you even do that. You’re not allowed to make me feel like I’m the dick in this situation. I don’t know what the hell is up with you, but you’re not allowed to drag me through the dirt just cause.”

He looked like he didn’t know how to respond. “Look, I’m so-“

“I don’t wanna hear it Tony. You’re just going to say something and I’m going to forgive you. Let me be angry for a moment because I’m allowed to be. Why don’t you just go with Pepper to New York already and leave me alone for a while.”

He opened his mouth and closed it again.  Taking his time to figure out something to say that wouldn’t make you feel any better or angrier. “Okay. I’m going to work on the power source. It shouldn’t take that long maybe a few days plus some time for press. I...” Tony cleared his throat, “I’ll see you, YN.”

You nodded and turned your back on him. He’d see the angry tears threatening to fall or the crack in your voice when you spoke. The close of your front door broke you down easily. You missed your best friend. Nowadays he was just so snappy, you handled it as long as you could but there was so much a person can take.

“Mommy?” Ro said sleepily, rubbing at her eyes, “Why crying?”

You wiped your tears, composing yourself quickly. “Maybe a little bit.”

She frowned but walked over to hug your leg. “Is because I was bad? I’m sorry mommy.”

Picking her up, you kissed the top of her head. “Thank you for apologizing, sleepyhead. You didn’t make me cry.”

“Promise?” She asked, holding up her hooked pinkie finger.

“Promise.” You hooked your pinkie on hers. She pulled away and stood on top of the counter. After looking through the cabinets she came out with a couple of cookies. “You have a punishment baby. No sweets.”

Ro pouted, “I know. But you give me cookies to make me feel better.”

You laughed softly, “You’re sweet. Give me that cookie. You can eat both of those.”

She munched on her cookies happily. “Daddy’s in the garage? Working?”

“Sorry sweetheart,” you shook your head, “Something important came up and he had to leave the early.”

“Am I important?” She tried out the word.

“Of course you are.”

“Then daddy has to be home?”

“Of course he wants to,” you assured her, “You mean the world to your dad and I, but we still need to work. Maybe when daddy comes back we’ll spend sometime with him.”

“A lot.”

-

He tried to focus on work. Really these last bits to make the new building light up like a Christmas tree didn’t need as much mental power. He had been taking out his anger on you, not on purpose, it just happened that way. It didn’t sit well with him that everything between the two of you had seemed to change. There were years of set behavior he was having to change about himself. He wasn’t happy with the situation at all.

At least he could get some things out of his system before. Having you as close as he used to made him feel content enough to do what he needed. Now he realized it was completely unfair to Pepper. She made him feel as close to happy as he thought he could get. He hadn’t realized how dependent he had also been on you to feel that way.

He needed to make up his mind. Figure out his plan. This wasn’t healthy to keep pulling Pepper along and ignore the flashing red lights. Things wouldn’t change anytime soon, but at least he was thinking about it at all.

“You’re all good on this end. The rest is up to you.”

-

Pepper and Coluson has left hours ago, leaving him with a bunch of homework to finish. J.A.R.V.I.S. switched through reports about the Avengers while Tony read essays and theories about the field.

“Pause.” He day back in his chair, looking at everything on the screen. Getting up, he went to make himself a coffee. “J, be a dear and call YN won’t you. I have things I should say. ‘Sorry’ being one of them.”

“That’s ill advised, sir.”

“I know she said to leave her alone, but come on, I need a break.”

“Dr. LN is going to attempt to break a surgical record at the hospital. She needs to be well rested for her day.”

Tony stirred some sugar into his coffee before taking a drink. “What record is she beating?”

“Longest surgery. The current record is held by Dr. Conner. She needs to go over 23 hours 57 minutes.”

“Hmm,” he nodded considering the time, “She’ll knock that out of the park, easy. She handles Ro and I all the time. Where’s Ro going to be?”

“Ro asked Colonel Rhodes to pick her up after school to treat her for ice cream and a movie.”

Tony laughed, “R&R day? Sounds good. I guess no break then, let’s get back to work.”

-

“Mama don’t wanna go to school,” Ro whined, pulling the covers over herself. “Stay home today.”

“You know we can’t. I have a surgery today and you have a lot of things to learn too. Besides you promised Rhodey you’d go out with him after school. Can’t do that if you stay home.”

She peaked out of her blankets, “I can’t?”

“Uh huh. You know uncle Rhodey doesn’t like it when you stay home, unless you’re sick.”

“Daddy would let me stay home.”

“Then you can stay home when he’s around, for now let’s get you dressed. I need to be at the hospital as soon as I drop you off at school.”

“Can I wear my Captain America shirt and pancakes?”

“You got it.”

Getting Ro ready seemed like a mission and a half. She was fussy and still tired. “You and daddy don’t like me,” she decided as you brushed her hair.

“We love you,” you corrected, “What had dad and I told you about nonsense talk?”

“Uh huh! Not nonsense! You are always working. Aaron says that’s why you’re always at work, because you don’t like me,” she said, defiantly crossing her arms over her chest.

You finished up with her hair and kneeled down to her level. “That Aaron kid is a jerk. He’s the type of kid that likes making you feel bad about yourself. You’re right though, your dad and I could stand to cut back on work a bit. I’m sorry if you really do feel that way, but you do know how much you mean to us, right?”

She nodded, not looking completely convinced, “Can I talk with daddy?”

“Sure. We can try to call him. Go grab your backpack and lunchbox. You can call him on the way to school.”

Once you were in the car you dialed Tony and handed the phone off to Ro while it rang. She waited impatiently a couple of minutes before chucking the phone onto the car floor. “Say leave messages.”

“I’ll ask Rhodey to try again when he picks you up okay? He’s probably jus-“

“Busy, busy, busy.”

-

Between the Shakespear’s wet dream brothers, S.H.E.I.L.D., and the Capsicle’s constant jabs. Tony hadn’t had much time to check his phone. Still, when he had picked it up for a second he got to hear the message Ro left when she forgot to hang up. Adding to an already bad day. But he could make that up easily. Less time with the suits more time with the kid starting as soon as he got away from this other mess.

He just had to figure out what Fury was hiding and what Loki wanted. Couldn’t be that hard to solve with Loki locked up.

-

Okay, so now that he was carrying a nuke on his back, heading for a giant hole in the sky. He wasn’t sure he’d be around long enough to make it up to Ro. Good thing to know the last thing he did to her was disappoint.

“Sir, shall I try Miss Potts?”

Tony’s eyes flicked over to see the picture of Pepper on the side of the screen. “Call YN.”

-

Your phone vibrated in your assistant’s pocket.  Checking to see if the name was one of the ones you allowed to interrupt, he put the ear piece in for you and answered the call.

“Hello? Is everything okay?” You asked, expecting Rhodey’s voice.

“Always better when you’re around,” Tony greeted. “How’s the record going? Tired yet?

“Nah, I took some notes from you,” you joked, he didn’t sound urgent. A snip and clip there. “You’re going to have your hands full when you come home.”

“Can you tell her I’m sorry for disappointing her and that I love her.”

That was weird. “Tell her yourself. Rhodey’s calling you after she gets out of school.”

“I love you, too, YN. It’s been too long since I said that and you should know.”

“I love you,” you replied back instinctively, “Are you okay, Tony?”

Static.

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[ettavalois]

The Wildly Glorious And Extremely Chaotic Sexual Awakening Of A Red Headed Woman Who Is A Little Fearless Now

I think the moment I realized I wanted to

Surrender all of my willpower to you was the moment your alarm went off at 8:10 in the morning and it was the

Third Time I had slept in your bed.

My eyes shot open and you were still Unconscious beside me and our legs and arms had stayed wrapped in the same position all

Night.

And my eyes wandered around the room and I soaked up everything around me

Like the stickers on your desk and the books on your shelves and the posters on your walls

And I took all these pictures in my mind until I

Stared at you sleeping and felt you breathing on me

When I thought, Whoa

I want to be in this man’s life

Then I wondered if you might’ve been dreaming of me, like in a sweet, subconscious way or

Literally replaying the moment when I moaned your name and gripped your jaw with my

left hand around 1 AM

And decided I’d be happy with either one.

Because before you,

I’ll admit I was a complete and utter

repressed sick disillusioned nightmare.

I was born Plutonian

And trying on so many masks trying to be America’s Sweetheart just to cover up the fact that to the core I have always been

Possessive, and controlling

(So, so possessive)

Totally scared of commitment yet would dominate guys in every way and then they’d feel emasculated when they’d see I was

The One who was Wearing The Pants in every relationship

(And then they’d end it)

Manipulative, The Victim

Flighty but cried when the last boyfriend said he didn’t wanna fuck anymore

And maybe most importantly

Would gladly burn myself to the ground

(And anyone else I’ve kissed)

Just to start over, just to clear my slate

And ruin some more lives in the name of hopeless romantics with control issues

But honestly whenever you bite my thigh and pin my hands above my head I know that I

Would give you Complete And Absolute Control over my entire existence

Would fork it over

Just like that

While holding your hand.

I could make a list of things we do that have shattered my obsessive behaviors

Like post-sex PB&Js at two in the morning

And drinking 99 cent store peach tea from

the jug

You petting my hair and trying to get all the tangles out because Yeah, The Sex

And then just laying at the foot of your bed with No clothes on talking for hours on end about developmental traumas and you roasting me about astrology and making you laugh and kiss my face until we both realize

We are actually hand-made for each other

And that scares us.

Maybe I feel fearless with you

Because you are the most terrifying thing in my life and I know I’m what’s missing in

Yours

I’m just wondering how on earth you stripped away my shell and my layers and layers of

Cynicism and Judgement and every single defensive cell in my body

With you I’ve always been Real Me.

And with me you could always see the gears turning.

So, yeah, this is me letting you lead this thing

This is me sleeping over regularly

This is me watching you practice magic

And sharing your fuzzy blankets and climbing flights of stairs to your apartment and looking at you with a lump in my throat thinking, Whoa

I want to be in your life.

You say you love Casablanca Lilies

And suddenly I want to smell like them

Infinitely, indefinitely.

E.V.

[writingmi]

We're Now Married | Tom Holland x Reader (Part 1)

“You could still back out, you know,” Kenna, the eldest of your band, muttered. You nodded in acknowledgement at this. You knew this wasn’t one of your best decisions. The fact that you’re doing this alone and not with your band was a dangerous territory in itself. But you couldn’t pass up the chance to be in a world-wide show with an actor who is also known world-wide. “It’s not too late, (y/n).”

“You could still back out, you know,” Kenna, the eldest of your band, muttered. You nodded in acknowledgement at this. You knew this wasn’t one of your best decisions. The fact that you’re doing this alone and not with your band was a dangerous territory in itself. But you couldn’t pass up the chance to be in a world-wide show with an actor who is also known world-wide. “It’s not too late, (y/n).”

“I know, Kenna,” you grumbled. She was only looking out for you, you know that. That fact made it even harder for you to back out. You’re the youngest of the band, sure, but that doesn’t mean that you’re a kid. you’re already 20, for God’s sake!

“Don’t worry, Kenna,” your guitarist, Arabella, called out. Her brown hair was swaying back and forth as she walked towards the two of you. You couldn’t help but giggle a little when she almost bumped into one of the crew. She slid into her seat beside you and patted your head, grinning . “(Y/n)'s a wise girl and she can make decisions on her own.”

“I know that,” Kenna grumbled, pinching her nose. “I can’t help but worry.”

“All you do is worry,” Elyse slid into her seat, wrapping an arm around Kenna’s shoulder. You smiled at the two, loving how close the four of you had gotten in the past year. “Try and relax a little.”

“5 minutes till we start!” The producer called out, her voice ringing around the small cafe. It was small and cozy, and there were small plants hanging from the ceiling, giving the small cafe a green tint. This would have been a cafe you visited more often if you pursued college instead of stardom.

Rubbing your hands, you smiled at your members. They grinned back at you before bursting into a laugh.

“I can’t believe the youngest of Unisex is finally getting married!” Elise squealed, reaching over to pinch you cheek. This girl is hyper, you can’t help but chuckle at it.

All of you stopped laughing when a small rectangular box was given to you. It was pink with small hearts decorating it.

“What is it?” Kenna asked. “Is it a gift? Is there a ring inside?”

“It’s too early for that, Kenna,” you laughed. This was nerve-wracking and exciting at the same time. All you could hope was that your partner would be a nice man that you could get along well.

The producer was calling out some commands to the crew before he announced, “Settle! Action!”

“Okay, let’s open it,” Kenna said, clapping her hands. “In 3, 2, 1!”

“What’s in it?” You immediately asked, leaning on the table. Your stomach dropped when you saw that it was a phone and a small card. You didn’t know what you were expexting but it definitely wasn’t this.

Ara picked up the small card while you plucked the phone from the box, inspecting it a little. “To Mrs. (Y/n), your virtual marriage will be starting tomorrow!”

Elise and Kenna shrieked. You laugh at their antics. Sure, this was all acting and you can feel the cameras staring at you. But it was endearing when they can still act normal despite many eyes watching.

“I'm kind of guilty that I’m the one getting married first before you guys,” you admitted.

“You can give this to me, then,” Kenna said, grabbing the small box. The laughter didn’t die down and you could hear the small crew laughing along.

“I have a question,” raising her hand, Elise’s voice stopped the laughter. “What should we call him?”

Call him? They haven’t even met him and now they’re wondering what to call him?

“Brother-in-law!” Ara crowed.

“Brother-in-law?!” You repeated. That’s specific and awkward. “Why are you asking this anyway?”

“So that we know what to call him if we meet,” she answered, flipping her hair. “When we meet, I mean.”

“Anyway, let’s open the phone!” You set the phone at the center of the table so that everyone could see. When you opened the phone, there was only the messaging app in the middle of the screen.

“What do you wanna do? Do you want to text first?” Elise suggested, wriggling her eyebrows. You threw a napkin at her face, shaking your head lighty.

“She shouldn’t,” Kenna muttered to herself. You nodded. “Girls aren’t usually the ones who makes the first move.”

“But why isn’t he sending anything?” you moaned, arms stretching out on the table and laying down your head. The nervousness was getting to you and you want to get this over with. What’s more, you have to put up an act in which you’re excited to talk and meet with a total stranger.

“There isn’t anything to fret about,” Ara soothed, patting your head. She was the motherly kind of your group and she’s especially close to you. This is probably due to the fact that the both of you auditioned together for the studion. “They probably didn’t tell him anything so that’s why he hasn’t sent anything.”

You swiped around with the phone. You could feel the others’ stares around you and could hear someone chuckle in amusement. While they were talking and wondering about your partner, you debated on whether to pick up that phone and make the first move.

When you were little, your father told you that girls don’t take initiative when it comes to things like this. But right now, you wanted to say a small ‘Hello’ or send a wave but that would be too bold. Especially when this would be broad-casted worldwide and you wanted to look good for your father.

You jumped when a loud ‘Ping’ resounded and echoed around the room. “It’s here, it’s here, it’s here,” you muttered, standing up and rubbing your arms. All of you stared at Elise, waiting for her to read the text.

“What are you guys looking at?” she asked.

“Read it!”

“There is no text,” she laughed. You squint your eyes at her, sure that you just heard something. “I just wanted to make sure that the phone isn’t defective so I clicked around.”

All of you groaned. This was getting nowhere and the nerves are skyrocketing every second. What if your partner backed out? God, this was a waste of time that should've been spent practicing for your next album.

“Sorry, sorry, I’ll put it down now,” Ara apologized but not before laughing loudly every 5 seconds.

“But this person seems like he’s very careful,” Elise observed. Ths made everyone quiet down. You couldn’t help but glare playfully at her.

“Hey, don’t criticize my husband,” you said, slamming your fist down at the table. They stared at you wide-eyed and you fought the urge to break out a smile. This is all acting for the sake of the show.

“You guys haven’t even started yet,” Kenna argued. “You guys are starting tomorrow, you know. And we’re all sad right now because you’re getting married first.”

The playful atmosphere was back and all of you are now back to laughing and messing with each other. This js what you love about your group. No one takes anything personally because all of you are way past personally knowing each other. Everyone of you have memorized each other emotionally and mentally like the backs of your hands.

“Guys should be the one who makes the first move, you know,” you said. All this waiting was making you tired. And thirsty.

For about three minutes, the four ofyou were just goofing around. You can’t help but glance at the phone every now and again. You weren’t really an impatient type of kid but a guy shouldn’t make a woman wait, especially when he knows that a woman is waiting.

Another loud ‘Ping’ rang out and this time, you all held your breath as Kenna opened the phone. You could hear your heart beating loudly through your ears, or maybe that’s just the blood rushing. It was a little bit despicable, really, how you were waiting for a single text from a stranger.

“He just said ‘hello’,” Kenna announced. Wow. All of you were worrying and all you get was just one text. This reality show business is now getting funnier and funnier to you.

“What if you be straightforward?” Elise said, grabbing the phone. Now, they’re the one who’s texting him when you’re the wife. “‘Who are you?’”

“That’s a little bold, don’t you think?” you babbled. What if you were coming off too strong? God, this really isn’t helping with anything.

“Oh, he sent a pic!”

“This could be anyone!” you moaned. He was clever, you have to admit. Making the pic black and white and cropping out half of his face. Half of his face… you shook that thought out of your head. It couldn’t be. “What should I send?”

“I’ve got an idea,” Ara said. She was giving out instructions and poses for you, which you immediately followed. Now, this was familiar. Posing for pics wasn’t a problem for you and it was just a matter of time before you found the right angle and lighting. They had you transfer to another table and grab a random book out of the shelf that was at the corner. Their efforts in making you faceless was kind of witty and resourceful, you have to give them that.

“And… send!” Kenna announced. “Ugh, I’m so excited for tomorrow!”

“Oh, wait there’s another card,” you said, taking the card that was handed out to you from the cameraman. “Tomorrow is the day the both of you would meet. Prepare a small gift for your husband and enjoy a day together.

“I’m already a gift, aren’t I?” The members snickered at your suggestion. “Well, what do you suggest?”

“Let’s clean up now,” Kenna said. You groaned at her dismissal. A gift… it’s hard to think of one when you don’t know if the person would even like it.

“Is there any other girl like me?” You asked them.

“Well, no."

“That’s why!” You grinned. “I’m the best gift for him!”

Prologue

Part 1

Part 2

Tags are open!

[sweetpxsin]

Neighbor AU! Lai Guanlin [Requested]

Pairing: Lai Guanlin x Reader

Genre: Fluff// Neighbor! Au // Bulletpoint- scenarios

Requested:sorry i took too long to answer you back, i only saw your reply today. anyways, regarding the guanlin fluff, i was thinking about neighbor!au (can be idol!guanlin or not) hehe :”> thank you so much 💗💗💗💗💗

Summary/Extra:Guanlin moves into your neighborhood and is a lost puppy// I was debating whether to write it as a fic or a bulletpoint-scenario so it ended up kinda messy. I hope you enjoy tho!

•Alright so one day you were just minding your own business, ya know doing yo thang, scrolling through Instagram

•Till like noises from outside made you sit up in curiosity

•since your bed is like across the window you could kinda see some people were finally moving into the house to the left of yours

•but like ew neighbors and you laid back down cause that’s none of your business

•a couple minutes later your mom yells your name and you’re literally scrambling down the stairs

•”yes?”

•”say hi to our new neighbors.”

•you would have whined a little but she was making that face (you know the face where parents are like be normal or I will hit you and you will never hear the end of this type of face?)

•So you turned towards the family with your best smile and say ‘hi welcome to the neighborhood I hope you like it here. Oh and you can call me (y/n)’

•You should have seen how proud your mother was with your introduction but that’s not the point

•taking a quick glance at the family you spot a guy your age

•You mentally sigh because he is the most handsomest thing on planet earth you’ve ever seen  Well besides Jihoon who is your best friend but what he doesn’t know won't’ hurt him and your only interactions with him would probably be cringe neighbor stuff

•after the awkward introduction you sort of forgot about your new neighbors till you walked out of your house and noticed he wore a similar uniform to you

•You didn’t actually take a good look because you were more concerned in getting into class on time rather than being late

•and it didn’t cross your mind till you heard chatter about a new student being in your class

•you were actually interested in knowing if said student was your neighbor cause though he knew your name, you didn’t know his

•and before you knew it your mind was filled with questions about him

•soon  the bell rung signaling the beginning of school

•the teacher walked in and quieted the students to make some announcements before telling the student to enter the classroom

•once he entered the room he received loud response from the class

•he had a gummy smile the whole time

•”Hello, I’m Lai Guanlin from Taipei please take care of me.”

•The teacher thanked him and asked him to please take a seat

•as his eyes scanned the classroom for empty seats his eyes locked with yours before making his way to his desired seat

•You watched as he sat next to you and noticed how his smile got slightly wider and his first words to you were the cutest thing ever

•”Hi neighbor.”

• A little cringey but you still thought it was super cute just because of how happy he was

•However your interactions were cut short when the teacher called attention to the front board to start class

•You couldn’t help but pout a little wanting to know a little more about your neighbor whom you had just found out was from Taipei

•But the gesture didn’t go unnoticed by your one and only best friend

•He was quick to nudge you intrigued with the interactions exchanged from the both of you

•”You're totally into him.”

•”Be quiet Jihoon.” *elbows his tummy*

•”Deny it all you want (y/n)~”

•You rolled your eyes before sneaking a glance at Guanlin

•You were merely interested in all honesty not romantically but more in a friendly way  

•”Ohhohoho sneaking glances already?”

*Que another tummy elbow jab and Jihoon grunting in pain*

•ANYWAYS

•After homeroom you headed to your next class not really expecting to share any classes with Guanlin because you barely shared any classes with Jihoon

•But you were surprised to find the taller male by your side as you walked

•”Um (y/n) right?”

•”Yup!”

•He shot you another gummy smile before nervously scratching the back of his head

•”Do you know where classroom K307 is?”

•”...On the other side of the building…But I can walk you if you want,  I just have to tell the teacher ”

•”Please?”

•And that’s kinda how your day went, you walked Guanlin to his classes occasionally with a jealous Jihoon why ya’ll gonna make ma boy 3rd wheel

•By the end of the day both of you headed your separate ways… Well kind of Guanlin was picked up while you walked home

•Once you got home your mom instantly bombarded you with question

•”Did you know the neighbors son goes to your school?”

•”How is he? Is he nice? What’s his name?”

•You answered all her question before heading up to your room to do some homework

•after about a good amount of doing home working with a bit of getting side track you had finished your homework

•It was getting dark by now so you moved from your desk to your bed  and laid there, going through your phone lazily

•However you were soon interrupted with the sound of something hitting your window

•Getting up you walk to your window and find Guanlin smiling like a kid as he waved, halfway sticking out of his window

•You opened your window and mimicked his actions

•”What are you doing?”

•”I just wanted to say thanks for helping me get to my classes today!”

•You roll your eyes playfully unable to hide the smile playing on your lips

•”You couldn’t  have texted me?”

•”I-I don’t have your number!”

• You pulled your phone out of your pocket but was stopped mid way when your mom  suddenly called your name for dinner

•”Hey Guanlin I have to go right now I’ll talk to you later alright?”

•”W-wait can I-“

•”Bye Guanlin!”

•You quickly waved goodbye and shut the window before hurrying down the stairs

•once you got back to your room you glanced out your window and noticed the lights were off so you didn’t bother and went to bed

•the next day the idea completely slipped your mind till Guanlin had taken his seat next to yours

•”oh hey Guanlin about yesterday what were you going to ask me?”

•”oh that…*awkwardly clears throat* I was gonna ask if I could have your number… I-I MEaN OnLy iF YOu WAnT TO B-bUT yUO DoN’t HAve tO.”

•By the time he was done stumbling over his words you had already scribbled your digits on a piece of paper before handing it to him

•”Here.”

•”T-Thanks.”

•”But you can still talk to me via window it’s cute.”

•You shot Guanlin a smile in which he returned and your could've sworn you saw him blush a little

•but of course the cute moment was short lived before Jihoon’s voice creeped into your ear

•”Just date already.”

•*que you kicking his leg* bruh stop abusing this baby

•class soon started afterwards though so it’s not like Jihoon had really interrupted anything

•the day went on as normal with you occasionally helping Guanlin to his next class if he had forgotten and just so happened to see you along his way

•and this kind of carried on for a while till Guanlin has memorized his classrooms

•but that didn’t really stop the friendship from growing

•Guanlin and you still said hi when you passed each other in the halls

•had late night talks about stupid things whether it be over phone or via window

•if anything you could say he was becoming your second best friend

•One particular night Guanlin had hit your window multiple times with small pebbles till you finally opened your window

•”You know you could have texted instead of pelting little rocks at my window.”

•”I know but it’s fun!”

•He gave you his adorable gummy smile and of course you sighed in defeat

•”Of course it is. One day I hope it breaks.”

•”Hey!!”

•”I’m joking but whatsup?”

•”Your smart right?”

•”Decently why?”

•”Can you tutor me?”

•”oh omg is thee Lai Guanlin asking me to tutor thy?”

•”Yes. Now can you tutor me or naw????”

•”listen swaggy rapper keep the sass to yourself. But sure what do you need help in?”

•”everything”

•Your jaw literally dropped but you obliged and the studying session began the next day

•after class you and Guanlin had met up in the library to try and figure out where he needed help the most

•in all honesty he wasn’t bad he just took longer to grasp some concepts

•and this continued on for a while to the point studying at the school library went to studying in your room

•most of the time you guys would study but occasionally you two would mess around as in make jokes, poke fun at each other or watch videos

•every study session would usually end with your head on his shoulder with both of you laughing at dumb videos

•thought one day during study session you were a lot sleeper than  usual and ended up falling asleep

•Guanlin noticed and his face softened before he placed you in your bed and tucked you in before he quietly left

•when you woke up with Guanlin’s coat on the next day your guys friendship kinda deepened into something more for each of you

•I mean it was bound to happen you two basically spent every chance you had with each other js

•But of course both of you kept your feelings to yourself with subtle hits  

•like Guanlin would brush his hand against yours before holding it if you didn’t pull it away

•both of you would subtly complement each other and laugh even more at each other’s joke not matter how stupid they wer

•if someone didn’t know better they would have already thought both of you were dating

•ANYWAYS

•While Guanlin and you were hanging out Guanlin had told you he was going to be on a show called produce 101

•At first you thought he was joking because ITS FRiCkeN PRoDucE 101

•but when you realized he wasn’t you were really happy for him like genuinely happy for him

•okay maybe a little too excited for him like you were already imagining his audition and how he was going to do so amazing

•”okay but like your going to capture the hearts of the judges trust me.”

•”like their wigs will be snatched.”

•”okay but like you better still text me or I will kick you when you come back.

•anyways Guanlin was just happy how super supportive his best friend was

• When Guanlin finally left he felt confident asl But was still really nervous but kept thinking of you

•You were still so excited to see Guanlin on 101 so when the first episode dropped you literally stopped everything and told everyone to shut up

•OH AND YOU ALSO WERE ROOTING FOR JIHOON BUT THAT'S NOT THE POINT YOUR GUANLIN- wait what

•But after watching the first episode you kinda felt bad for Guanlin but continued to support him *and Jihoon*

•throughout the show you swore you never cried and screamed so much

•But you had fallen in love with the other trainees and their hardwork and dedication especially with Guanlin

•so when the last episode was coming up you were a literally wreck

•you became even more of a wreck when Guanlin’s parents had invited you to come watch the last stage live with them

•of course you said yes and when the day came it was literally so surreal

•Especially when Boa had started to announce the final line up

•you literally so nervous like you didn’t even know why

•BUT BITCH WHEN YOUR TWO BEST FRIENDS HAD MADE IT INTO THE FINAL LINEUP YOU BEST BELIEVE YOU WERE A CRYING MESS BUT IT WAS OUT OF HAPPINESS

•You had first found Jihoon though and hugged the crap out of him and literally yelled congratulation at him and told him how proud you were of him

•when you found Guanlin you both literally yelled each other’s name and you ran into his arm

•y’all hugged each other so tightly awww lil cutie

•Guanlin was so excited and in the moment that when he pulled back he had kissed you in the moment and cause he liked you

•Honestly you were super shocked but kissed back because heck you liked this boy a lot that’s an understatement

•when he pulled back you both were smiling little blushy nerds

•and your faces only got redder when the boys cheered the both of you

•Guanlin ended up pulling you flush against his chest in a hug,giggling like a child

•”you have no idea how badly I wanted to do that.”

•”oh?so you liked me back for a while?”

•”shut up I caught you staring when you introduced yourself cutie. You were in love at first sight~”

•”shoot caught red handed.”

•”I love you, you little nerd.”

•”I love you too s-swaggy rapper.”

[embhm]

Chapter 191: A JOURNEY OF LOVE

NO SPOILERS PLEASE!!! in the comments or anywhere on this account. We have not finished reading the novel. No copy/paste and all that other shenanigans either. Votes/likes/comments are highly appreciated.

While reading, if available, please read the footnotes at the end of the chapter for clarification.

THANK YOU SIENNA for translating this super long chapter!! <3

Note–> Sae: Should I force you to add a witty note?  Alec: Does it have to be witty? Just add yours! I liked your notes! 😝 Sae: Because it’s cute XD. [actually, it’s because I’m too lazy to write a proper one.] Also, JS! Look what you’ve done to me. T^T 

Translator: Sienna            Editor: Sae + Alec

As always, THANK YOU for reading and enjoying the start of a NEW ADVENTURE with our boys:

GU HAI & BAI LUO YIN

《你丫上瘾了》

Chapter 191: A JOURNEY OF LOVE

During the first day inside the dark and cold tunnel, Gu Yang secretly prayed that Gu Wei Ting would not discover his existence too early. In this way, not only would it give Gu Hai a bit more time to fight his way out but the two could also escape without any hindrance.

Once the second day arrived, Gu Yang found it slightly difficult to endure the harsh conditions. Simply put, this tunnel was not meant for a human being to stay in. For someone like Gu Yang, it felt like he was being cooked in pot of cold stew. If it was just a matter of it being the cold weather, then he could easily handle it. But, the main problem was the dampness. Since Gu Yang has sensitive skin, it took only about ten hours for the painful itches to form and spread throughout the surface of his body. When the itches became too unbearable, Gu Yang would frequently untie the rope around his wrists and scratch his skin to relieve himself. Nonetheless, even as he suffered, he still prayed to the Heaven that Gu Wei Ting would come down a little later. This way, Gu Hai could run a bit further.

When the third day finally rolled in, Gu Yang started to curse in anger.

Gu Wei Ting, you ruthless fascist! Gu Hai is your son! He’s been in the tunnel for eight days already!! Think about it, eight full days without eating, drinking or sleeping; don’t mention a human being, even Superman would die!! Even if you’re ready to punish your own family for justice, can’t you at least look at your son’s corpse? Don’t tell me that you want to save some expenses on cremation, so you resorted to directly burying your son down here like this, is that it?

With resentment, Gu Yang picked up the water bottle beside him but before he managed to take a sip, he discovered that it was already empty.

Gu Yang’s body had long been ridden with frostbites that seemed to have drilled into his bones, leaving him numb… Aside from his stomach, he has lost all feeling in all the other vital organs in his body. Even worse, the only food supply that could possibly keep him alive was also scarce.

With each passing minute, Gu Yang’s admiration towards Gu Hai increased to a whole new level. He couldn’t even start to imagine how Gu Hai could endure such a dreadful situation without any water for the past five days. Not only that, he was still able to walk properly after being pulled out of the tunnel!

What a fucking capable person!  

But when Gu Yang pondered on it a bit longer, there was something else that influenced him to be such a capable person.

Someone like Gu Hai was able to survive under these harsh conditions was purely due to an unprecedented sense of willpower and motivation that drove him forward. Inadvertently, it was worth it for him to endure all these hardships. But what the hell am I doing here? Is it for the sake of protecting their love? What does their love have to do with me? Haven’t I been against their relationship the entire time?

Poor, pitiful Gu Yang. Even after enduring this senseless torment for three days, he still doesn’t know why he let himself be reeled into it.

One hour…I’m going to give you only one more hour. If you don’t save me in an hour, I’ll!!… I’ll climb up by myself!

During this entire ordeal, there was one other person experiencing this torment with Gu Yang. This person was none other than Sun Jingwei. Every single night as he closed his eyes and allowed sleep to overtake him, he suffered from horrible nightmares. In these dreams, Gu Hai would struggle and cry out for help with tears–that have been mixed with dirt–rolling down his face.

For the last three days, Sun Jingwei’s complexion has gradually changed from a somewhat healthy wheat-colored tone into an unsightly sallow shade of brown. Unsurprisingly, even his spirit was subjected to an agonizing torment. His tolerance toward this cruel act has been completely destroyed, leaving behind only sympathy to riddle his mind. For him, nothing is more important than a human life. He would rather be demoted than look on without helping as a child lay dying beneath his room.

As a matter of fact, an hour before, Gu Yang had already prepared to climb out. However, his hands and feet were bound. During the past two days, he could untie the ropes with much ease. But unfortunately, he was met with complete disaster today. This time around, both his hands have already gone numb, and as a result, he couldn’t even summon an ounce of strength to tear at the rope. Nevertheless, it was also thanks to his inability to untie the ropes that the time was delayed, or else his efforts for the last two days would have been in vain.

Meanwhile, Sun Jingwei had removed the floorboard and proceeded to make his way into the tunnel.

In that moment, Gu Yang had already wriggled himself towards this opening of the tunnel. In turn, this would allow the unaware Sun Jingwei to have a much better chance of finding him. Once Sun Jingwei came close to where Gu Yang was laying, Gu Yang was suddenly frightened to the point that the hairs on his skin stood tall and it was not from the cold this time.

Where the hell did he come from? The opening of the tunnel is obliviously closed!

After his initial panic had settled, Gu Yang was suddenly dragged by a powerful force from the other opening of the tunnel. As soon as his eyes came into contact with the bright light, his entire body became rigid as stone.

Gu Hai, you bastard! I’ll fucking kill you!!! Why didn’t you tell me that there’s another opening right here? If you’ve told me earlier, I would have fucking escaped already!!!

After this realization, Gu Yang tried to calm his aching nerves from exploding. Since his face was covered with a thick layer of mud as dark as the night sky, it was hard to make out his features clearly. Due to this, Sun Jingwei mistook him as Gu Hai.

“Xiao Hai, I remember the day you went down, you weren’t tied up like this. This… why are you tied up now?” Sun Jingwei was about to untie the ropes around Gu Yang’s body but he was stopped in his tracks by just a few words from the person in front of him.

“Uncle Sun, it’s me, Gu Yang.”

Sun Jingwei’s expression went dull immediately. Then, as he carefully looked at the trussed up man once more, he finally realized that it really wasn’t Gu Hai.

“You……You……”

Gu Yang spoke first,  “Quick, call my uncle. I have something important to discuss with him.”

In less than a minute, Gu Wei Ting came bursting into the room.

Once Gu Yang saw Gu Wei Ting, his face that was drawn with great injustice like that of Dou E’s[1]pitiful situation, instantly looked as though he is ready to take down the opponent that appeared in front of him.

“Uncle, you have to find justice for me!” Gu Yang waved his hands and feet, intentionally showing Gu Wei Ting the ropes. “When I came to look for you that day, I had orignally wanted to try and persuade Gu Hai. But! Who would’ve thought the brat had such an evil scheme in mind! He tied me up and shoved me into the tunnel. If Uncle Sun didn’t pull me out in time, I would’ve died in the tunnel by now!”

After listening to Gu Yang’s explanation, Gu Wei Ting’s expression was simply drawn with a complete sense of loss. But no matter how furious he was, he must undo the ropes on Gu Yang’s body first.

“Didn’t you send me a message before you left that day?”

Gu Yang forced a bitter smile, “Gu Hai walked out of here wearing my clothes. Think about it, how could I have sent you that message?”

An image of a powerful and magnificent hurricane was engraved on Gu Wei Ting’s face like a live painting.

—

Two days ago, Bai Luo Yin and Gu Hai diligently loaded their cars with food and clothes. Under Bai Han Qi’s earnest and attentive gaze, they officially set out together on a journey of elopement.

Bai Han Qi watched, seemingly lost in thought, as the shadows of the two cars gradually disappeared into the distance.

“Hey, I don’t really know if doing this is for their own good or will it harm them instead…..” Aunt Zou’s face was filled with anxiety when she expressed her concern.

Hearing those words, Bai Han Qi laughed thoughtlessly, “We’ll just give it a try. Not preparing might turn out to be a good thing.”

“Try it out?” Aunt Zou suddenly pinched Bai Han Qi’s cheek, “Is there any father out there like you? You’re carelessly treating your son’s youth like an experiment! What if it fails, who will take responsibility and compensate for it?”

“In life, there’s no direct path that will genuinely lead to true success or complete failure. Every single step taken is a meaningful experience. Walking on a crooked path isn’t necessarily a bad thing. And at the same time, walking on the correct path the entire time isn’t necessarily a good thing either.”

“That seems reasonable enough……” Aunt Zou’s brows rose as she shot Bai Han Qi a side glance.

Bai Han Qi laughed mischievously, “Of course it is. For young people like them, traveling the world is not a bad thing. Who on earth hasn’t done a few absurd or idiotic things during their lifetime?! Just look at such an honest and well-behaved man like me. When I was young, I still managed to do one or two groundbreaking things by myself.”

“What groundbreaking things?” Aunt Zou asked.

“At that time, my parents were completely against my marriage with Jiang Yuan, but I was bold enough to follow my dreams. They also used all means possible to obstruct our marriage. Let me tell you, they even threatened to disown me. Despite it all, I refused to compromise with them. It’s our love, so why should other people have a decision in it?!!” Bai Han Qi’s expression was packed with pride and dignity.

“And then what happened?” Aunt Zou asked intentionally.

Bai Han Qi’s shoulders collapsed as he answered, “After that, we divorced…”

“From your words, isn’t it clear that this was a bad decision then?” Aunt Zou’s voice carried a hint of anger, “But you still allowed them to leave!”

“With that said, if I hadn’t divorced Jiang Yuan at that time, would I have been able to remarry again? Would I have met you?”

Aunt Zou was rendered speechless, “…”

Having said that, Bai Han Qi became even more pleased with himself, “That’s why everything has its own advantages and disadvantage. The key is knowing at what given time do you measure its worth. I am a man who has faith in life. I believe that in your life, there exists a meeting with another person that is carefully planned by the Heavens. When the time comes, you will encounter such a person, a kind person possibly. But at times, you will also encounter some disasters. Honestly, for those kinds of matter, even if you want to avoid them, you can’t…”

Aunt Zou heaved a heavy sigh, “It’s such a pity. Yin Zi’s homeroom teacher called us yesterday. I was told that Yin Zi achieved brilliant results in every competition he participated in. Because of this, the school is considering giving him a recommendation for a university without him having to take the entrance examination. They also mentioned that Yin Zi should return to school and decide on this matter as soon as possible.”

“Huh?” Bai Han Qi’s complexion paled, “When did this happen? Why didn’t you tell me earlier?”

“I’ve told you already. I explained it to you last night. You even said ‘yeah’ to me.”

Bai Han Qi suddenly hit his forehead, “Oh no, I must’ve fallen asleep already at that time.”

“You regret it now?” Aunt Zou asked.

“……How can that be?” Bai Han Qi laughed awkwardly, while maintaining his ‘wise man’ like’ image, “This was a decision that I made after carefully thinking it all through. How can I simply go back on my words?!”

Aunt Zou merely nodded her head in response and said, “Well, let’s go home then.”

As Bai Han Qi turned around and began to walk, a subtle thought floated into his mind, but at that time, he didn’t voice it so as to avoid it. After feeling stifled for a while, he couldn’t help but to ask. “Did that teacher say which university they want to recommend him to?”

There was moment of silence before Aunt Zou replied, still somewhat hesitant, “It should be Qinghua University. In anycase, if it’s not Qinghua University, then it’s Beijing University.”[2]

At the mention of those two universities, Bai Han Qi’s tense body immediately twirled at full speed. Within just seconds, his clumsy legs rushed off in the direction that Gu Hai and Bai Luo Yin had driven away in. He shouted at the top of his lungs, hoping that maybe his voice would be heard. “SON! My brilliant son……”

Meanwhile, Aunt Zou hastily ran after him. With just a few large strides, she was able to grab hold of him. With a flustered and exasperated expression, she scolded him, “Why are you chasing after him now, huh? They are long gone!.”

A mask of distress settled cozily on Bai Han Qi’s fine face.

Sighing yet again, Aunt Zou resorted to dragging Bai Han Qi back, “Enough. Just accept your fate. This is also a part of Heaven’s plan. You won’t be able to catch up to them.”

Bai Han Qi gritted his teeth, “The Heavens are really despicable!”

—

On the road, Gu Hai and Bai Luo Yin drove in separate cars. Surprisingly, neither of them showed any sign of fear in having to escape in the middle of a difficult situation, or of having to be far away from their families. Instead, what hovered over them was the fresh and brilliant color of youth. Perhaps this brilliance occurred after they had experienced all those tribulations along with the immense pressure that they have endured to get this far. So now that they are finally free, they suddenly discovered that being alive is truly a beauty that should be held at the highest degree.

Rather than confining yourself in a cage, which doesn’t only harm you but also others, it is better to escape and enjoy the freedom and happiness to your heart’s content.

In their mind, this is only one of the many journeys that they will both take in their life together. Why not take advantage of their youth and go crazy while living to the fullest?!

Once they arrived at a desolate countryside bordering the mountain range, the two cars gradually slowed down before coming to a complete stop.

“Do you want to take a leak?” Gu Hai asked.

Bai Luo Yin nodded his head.

Finding that simple gesture rather lovable, Gu Hai grinned at him, “Then, let’s go together.”

Bai Luo Yin easily pushed Gu Hai to the side, “You better keep your distance from me.”

Instead of complying to those words, Gu Hai simply took out his huge cock; all the while, a wide and bright smile spread across his face.

Sighing, Bai Luo Yin grabbed Gu Hai’s body and turned him to the other side so that both of them were standing back to back.

“That won’t do!” Gu Hai cried out as he quickly turned his body back, “If I face that side, it’s going against the wind! Do you want me to piss all over myself?”

Bai Luo Yin’s shoulders quivered happily.

It has been a long time since Gu Hai had last seen Bai Luo Yin smile or laugh. The beauty that those smiles held was so radiant that the sight of it caused his heart to throb just a bit faster. As if captured by the moment, Gu Hai couldn’t restrain his eyes from drawing towards Bai Luo Yin’s seemingly dazzling face. His gaze trailed from the other boy’s face, then down a glance, then up a glance and back down again, lower and lower his stare went……

Bai Luo Yin cleared his throat, “Hey bro, you’re pissing on your hand.”

Pulled back from his daze, Gu Hai hastily look down.

“Where? My hands are dry.”

Meanwhile, Bai Luo Yin merely smiled without saying anything.

Gu Hai knew without being told that he was being fooled. So, as Bai Luo Yin fixed his pants, Gu Hai deliberately groped his round and plump butt cheeks a few times. Surprisingly, there was no retort.

After they finished settling their business, Bai Luo Yin–who loves being neat and clean–took out a bottle of water to pour it for Gu Hai to wash his hands.

“What a waste!” Gu Hai complained. Ever since he came out of the tunnel, he had notably adopted a great habit of conserving water.

Once their hands were cleaned, the two leaned against the car for a smoke.

While taking a look around the area Gu Hai asked, “Do you recognize this road?”

Without bothering to look, Bai Luo Yin simply shook his head, “I don’t recognize anything. This is the first time I traveled out this far.”

“Don’t tell me, you’ve never left Beijing before?”

“If you asked me this question two months ago, that’s what I’d definitely say. Unfortunately for you, I took a trip to Tianjin a while ago.”

“You went to Tianjin?” Gu Hai had not even an ounce of interest as he spoke, “What were you doing in Tianjin??”

“I went there with You Qi.”

Hearing those words, a hint of bitter jealousy began to saturate the air around them. Gu Hai lightly brushed away his cigarette butt while mocking Bai Luo Yin, “So, you’ve eloped with him before?”

Although he knew that Gu Hai said those words out of spite, Bai Luo Yin’s face still sank. Then he faintly said,  “Believe it or not, I’ll drive the car back right now?”

Noting the sudden change in his complexion and his voice, Gu Hai chuckled for a moment. He faced Bai Luo Yin and inched closer before taking a bite of his chin. The scent of the cigarette wafted along his chin then into his breath, mingling with the scent of weeds and wild flowers. Combined together, they gave off a natural and unruly sense of excitement.

“Hurry up and decide. Where should our first stop be?” Gu Hai asked with one last pinch of Bai Luo Yin’s cheek.

Instead of helping, Bai Luo Yin made things even more difficult for Gu Hai, “I can’t think of anything in such a short time.”

Gu Hai contemplated for a while before speaking, “How about this? I have a trick.”

In the height of their youth, Bai Luo Yin watched on blankly as Gu Hai took off his shoe and threw it up in the air. Then with a thud, the shoe landed on the ground.

Their eyes simultaneously traveled downward. The shoe pointed west.

“Okay, we’ll go that way then.”

In the end, Bai Luo Yin merely stared at Gu Hai, at loss for words, “……”

—-

Translator’s Note:

[1] Dou’e: the main female character from Chuzhou in a play (The Injustice to Dou E) written by Guan Hanqing. The story tells about a poor, innocent woman who was wronged, accused of killing, and tortured before she was sentenced to death. Before her execution, she swore that her innocence would be proven if three events occurred after she died, which were: her blood will spill on her clothes but it will not drip onto the ground, heavy snowfall will occur in the middle of the summer and the snow will cover her body, and Chuzou will experience drought for three years. The three events happened after Dou E’s death. Years later, when her spirit appeared before her father, her father reinvestigated her case and her innocence was brought to light. Then, the people who were involved in wronging her received their due punishments.

[2] Qinghua University and Peking University are two of the best academic institutions in China, both located in Beijing.

—-

Are you Addicted?

Original Novel by Chai Ji Dan

We, the translators and editors, DO NOT own any of this novel’s content.

[chocolatemillkk]

Right Decision (JS)

A/N: Just something I wrote a while back and since it was one of the few imagines actually completed I’ll just post it up. :)

I look at myself in the mirror, not actually seeing my reflection as my mind wanders to a million other thoughts. It was probably quite early. I hadn’t actually checked the time when I slipped out of bed but the sky outside was still dark-no hint of a rising sun. Way too early to be up.

But I just couldn’t fall back asleep when I woke up and adjusted to my surroundings. My anxious heart and overthinking mind kept battling until I had to get up and splash my face with cold water, telling them both to shut up.

I glance under the mirror to the products-very different than mine-that litter the sink. The dark-coloured “manly” hair products, shaving cream on the shelf, fancy lotions and I smile at the bath bombs. Joe was always going on about how he needed a good bath. I glance at the wide bathtub behind me and sigh, resting the weight of my body against the sink.

It had been months of friendship, shifting to flirting, slowly becoming annoying to everyone else who knew the both of us. “When are you two getting together?” Everyone always asked, usually in a frustrated tone. It only made Joe and I laugh though, secretly happy to take our sweet time falling together. The flirting and the teasing was fun-neither of us denied that. But then last week, in a surprise gesture he’d formally asked me out and last night was the dinner date we were both stupidly nervous for. The conversation felt too formal, the food tasted like sawdust, and we were holding our breath until the end. It was only once we’d come back to Joe’s, in our familiar place, that we began to relax and laugh about the tense dinner.

“I was almost scared that asking you on a date was the wrong move,” Joe laughed over a beer. The two of us had settled outside on his balcony. “It was a terrible dinner.”

“Awful.” I agreed. “I think we put too much pressure on it.”

“I think everybody put too much pressure. My hands were shaking-did you see them?”

“No,” I laughed. “I definitely would have poked fun at you if I had seen them.”

“I bet you would,” Joe scowled jokingly before he stretched his leg out towards me. I slapped it away, not wanting his big toe in my face.

“But anyway,” Joe had finally said after we’d fallen silent. His serious tone made my heart race, especially as he placed his bottle onto the floor to free his hands. My eyes stayed fixed on his as he slid closer. “Now that all the shite’s been cleared away, I know I made the right decision.”

“How would you know for sure,” I challenged. “When you haven’t even kissed me yet?”

Joe raised an eyebrow, impressed by my forwardness. His hands came up to stroke my cheek, “Guess I’ll have to just,” he guided my face towards him. “Make sure.” He muttered before he kissed me.

I had to remember to close my eyes because I was shocked despite the lead-up. But as soon as I relaxed, instinct took over and I was pushing into him to take it further. And in no time, we’d taken it the furthest it could go.

“Definitely the right decision,” Joe had grinned afterwards. We lay in bed facing each other, unable to keep the grins off of our faces.

“I’m still not too sure,” I teased which led to a play fight, Joe making sure I paid for the comment by tickling me until I couldn’t breathe.

But now at an ungodly hour, standing in front of his bathroom mirror, my head is reeling with all the highs and lows and all the emotions last night created. I touch my lips and smile, this was a first for me. This high I felt, a rushing emotion that inflated my chest with a certain happiness every time I thought about him. About us...I wasn’t certain, but I was pretty sure I was totally head over heels in love with him.

With one last glance in the mirror, I close the light and walk back to bed. I check my phone for the time and I’m glad to see I still had plenty of time to lay sleeping beside Joe.

I slide between the sheets, staring at the ceiling and listening to the sounds of Joe’s flat around me. I don’t realise I’d waken him until he shifts towards me and his arms wrap around my waist.

“Where’d you go?” He mumbles sleepily into my neck.

“Bathroom-I was putting hair dye in your conditioner,” I smile.

“I knew it was too good to be true,” his voice rumbles beside me. I turn to him, suddenly knowing for certain now that I loved him. Or I could love him and I will. Did everything he say have to sound so damn perfect?

“Go back to sleep,” I whisper, kissing his nose.

“Mhm,” he agrees, his warm hand creeping up my shirt to rest on my back. “Sleep.”

I stroke his slightly stubbled cheek, enjoying my chance to admire him this close. But he soon grabs my hand away and holds it between us, his eyes remaining closed. My heart swells. How did I get so lucky, I think, as I drift off to sleep myself. Things were always heading in this direction in an obvious way to everyone-even us. But I never imagined just how right it would feel until now. It was most definitely and without a doubt the right decision.

[chocolatemillkk]

Bathroom Floor (JS)

A/N: an old request of a tired Strictly Joe mixed with something from my own head. Also why does it feel weird to now write things based on him...

It was one of those weeks that felt like a Thursday on a Monday and now that it was actually Thursday, Joe was knackered. Practice had run late again and it was past one in the morning by the time his key turned in the lock and he dropped his bag by the front door. He wondered whether his girlfriend was home but her worn in slip-ons near his own shoes answer his question.

Skipping a snack of any sort, Joe grabs a bottle of water and quietly makes his way upstairs to run a bath. His body wanted to skip the bath, crying out for sleep instead, but he’d already made that mistake in week 2 and he wasn’t about to wake up incredibly sore tomorrow.

As Joe moves to his closet, he eyes your sleeping figure; you’re curled up on your side and the duvet has slipped off half of your body revealing your odd position. Joe bites back a laugh, knowing how often you kicked the blankets off in your sleep-there were a few times he’d woken up to a kick in the stomach from a sleeping Y/N.

As quietly as possible, Joe passes by the bed and stops for a second just to see his girlfriend’s face. It had been two whole days of not seeing each other after a whole year and a half of going out. You were nearing the end of your residency and your random schedules made it hard to see each other but throw in his late nights practicing and it meant no quality time together.

Joe reaches out to brush back a strand of your h/c hair. She was so beautiful, he thought before slipping out of the room.

The bath is almost full by the time Joe gets to it so he strips off and eases into the warmth of the tub.

•••

You're not quite awake when you hear the floorboard near the door that was known for creaking. You blamed it on that one time an angry Caspar tackled Joe to the floor there after a prank gone wrong.

Was it morning already, you wonder. You were still so tired after a full eighteen hour shift at the hospital; you wanted more sleep.

But Joe must be in bed.

This thought gets you to crack your eye and turn to Joe's side of the bed but it's empty-never been slept in. You bolt upright and reach for your phone immediately thinking of the worst scenarios but your alarm illuminates the time before you get to it: 1:54am-you had only been sleeping a couple hours. Joe's side was perfectly done because he hadn't gone to bed in the first place.

You lay your head back down and close your eyes, sighing as your beating heart goes back to normal. This week was way too long-longer because you'd barely seen Joe. And you were so very tired. You missed evenings with Joe but you were so proud of how far he'd come with dancing-you didn’t mind the weird schedule if it came with the price of Joe’s happiness.

A low humming catches your attenion as you begin to relax and you open your eyes again, turning your head to notice the faint warm light on the floorboards. And now that you were conscious of it-it did smell like vanilla. Joe must be home in the bath.

This thought alone convinces your tired body out of the comfortable bed it lay in to get a glimpse of your boyfriend. But not before you wrapped yourself in a furry blanket and slipped on your house slippers.

The door to the bath is ajar and Joe doesn't notice as you silently push it the rest of the way open but he catches your reflection in the mirror as you walk in and jerks his head your way.

"Shit you scared me," he chuckles when he sees it’s just a tired-looking Y/N.

"Sorry," you say softly. You shuffle to the tub and Joe reaches for your hand that dangles at your side.

"Did I wake you?" He asks, concerned that he'd potentially interrupted your sleep.

"Nah," you fold your knees and sit cross-legged on the floor beside the tub. The tiles were cold so you wrap your blanket tighter around you. "I just wanted to see your face."

Joe dips his hands into the bath’s foamy bubbles and creates a white beard for himself. "Here it is."

"Christmas is still a month away Santa Claus," you laugh at his silliness. Even with the tired bags under both your eyes, there was still time for play.

You swipe some of the bubbles off and blow them back into his face. He grabs your hand once it's empty and kisses your knuckles.

"I've missed you too." He kisses your hand again and you feel fluttering in your stomach as he smiles at you. Joe had a way of looking at you so tenderly, like you were a fragile thing he coveted and it always made you as nervous as the first time you saw him. The truth, however, was the complete opposite. You-your love for each other...you two were made of strong stuff. No matter how complicated your hours got as you chased your dreams and Joe chased his, you two were always with each other. Nothing fragile or breakable about that.

"How was practice?" You cover your yawn with the blanket. "How're you getting on?"

"We nearly nailed it! Just a bit more practicing," Joe comes alive as he talks about practice. "Can't tell you specific bits though-I can't wait for you to see it all on Saturday."

"Me too," you squeeze Joe's hand. “I’m oddly nervous.” You'd finally managed to get the Saturday evening off and you were going to watch Joe live for the first time since he started. Joe normally sent you clips of practice to watch during the week to catch you up on what he was up to but this week he refused to show you anything so as not to spoil the final performance. "But mostly I’m excited to see you in all your dancing glory up on the stage! Finally get to celebrate with you on time."

"Well we celebrate only if we make it to the next round." Joe says and the way his eyebrows scrunchle you can tell it was stressing him out.

"You're definitely making it," you trace out his brows to smooth the worry out. Tracing your finger down his nose you say, "You work way too hard not to make it-"

"So does everybody el-"

"Hey," you cut him off. "Don't doubt it."

You lean forward and kiss him, not realising how you missed even the solidness of Joe. And even though your hair gets wet as he tangles his soapy fingers into it and the corner of the blanket soaks into the tub, you hold the embrace for as long as you can.

"I'm so proud of you," you whisper as your forehead rests against his. "You've accomplished so much and I'm so proud."

"And I'm really proud of you," Joe deflects the praise humbly. "You've only got two more weeks of insane hours!"

"Just take the bloody praise without flipping it back on me will you?" You smile before pecking his lips.

"Touché," Joe flicks bubbles onto your nose.

You laugh and push him away, sitting back down on the floor but he grabs your hand and holds it to his slick chest. His thumb strokes the ridges of your knuckles and you settle against the side of the porcelain tub, your head laying on the edge. The two of you stay silent as you gaze at each other in the dim lighting, your arms running the length of the space between you two as you hold onto each other, both marvelling at how you got so lucky without saying a single thing. The dim lighting adds to the ambience of the night, the scented candles warming the room, and the gentle music playing from the speakers does the trick-lulling your eyelids closed.

Joe watches as you fight the sleep and slowly give in to it, your head resting against the side of the tub and the blanket wrapped tightly around you. He knew you'd just had a long shift and how normal it was for you to fall asleep right about anywhere-but this was new.

Joe stealthily reaches for his phone with his other hand and takes a picture for his collection of Y/N-sleeping-in-random-places. So far, there were over fourty photos.

Finally relaxing his own shoulders, Joe closes his eyes and allows his muscles to soak into the warmth of the water-minus the one hand still holding onto yours. He smiles to himself at what the two must look like. But he knows he would take any moments with you in your hectic lives, even if it was the simple act of holding hands just to feel close to each other. Even if that meant one of you sat on the bathroom floor while the other was submerged in water.

When the bath water eventually turns lukewarm, Joe sits up and moves your hand to your lap. He steps around you carefully to finish his nighttime routine. After tying his robe, he kneels to where you still slump, surprisingly in deep sleep.

"Y/N love," Joe tucks your hair behind your ear. You don't even budge so Joe shakes your shoulder. You mumbles something that sounds like go away and he can't help but laugh.

"You know I could put your hand in the water and then go away and you'd probably pee your pants," Joe tells you as he gets one arm under your knees instead and lifts you.

"Piss off," you mumble against his chest.

"Now you're awake," Joe shakes his head as he carries you to bed. "You just pulled the oldest trick in the book on me.”

You’re too tired to respond but a small smile tugs at your lips. It's mischievous and childlike, Joe observes. God, he loved this woman.

"Should've left you on the floor," Joe continues as he places you gently into bed and pulls the covers over your body. He settles in next to you, pulling you closer to his body because he'd missed the feeling. The way your solidness grounded him.

"I love you," Joe whispers into your ear, 3 words he never tired of telling you. You hum back, too tired to say the actual words-but hoping he understood it was tired talk for I love you too. With the way he tightens his grip around your waist, however, you were certain he understood it perfectly.

[chocolatemillkk]

Ski Trip (JS)

Request: Hey love, can you do one with Joe where you're with him and the boys skiing in Austria. You and the boys jokingly tease Joe for not being able to ski as he keeps falling over and getting frustrated. Then later on that night you're all out drinking and Joe gets completely smashed, he's talking gibberish and being silly with the boys. But then once you're back at the hotel he's all cute with you ☺ x

"Man down!" Josh shouts as we watch Joe from the bottom of the slope. "Again!"

You shake your head, unable to keep the laugh from coming out of you. You felt bad that Joe was trying so hard to get the hang of the slopes but each time he would lose his balance and go sliding on his face. This was probably the first time you had picked up on a skill faster than he had but it was cute seeing him so flustered.

"How did you get the hang of it so quick?" Joe asks later, winded and frustrated again.

"I'm a natural," You wink at him knowing it would just annoy him further.

"You've only gone once before!" Joe whines.

"Y/N is made for the snow," Caspar comments from behind you. You were from Montreal-a city in Canada known for its snow-so the running joke between the boys and you was that you were born from the snow and lived in it for the first eighteen years of your life. Until you moved to London, that is.

"You don't have the skiing technique," You make up.

"Yeah his posture is all wrong," Caspar joins in.

"I try!" Joe exclaims, taking your teasing seriously. "I do everything they taught but I keep falling down. I don't understand how you do it!"

You look to Joe and shrug, "I just have that...je ne sais quoi."

Joe groans and walks ahead as Caspar and you share a laugh. Later as you all warm up, you snuggle next to Joe and rest your head on his shoulder.

"You'll get the hang of it babe," you reassure him.

"No I won't!" Joe says. "I look like a joke out there."

"At least you're making people laugh," Josh says and we all groan at the bad joke.

"That's almost as bad as Joe's last trip down-sorry." Josh corrects himself which gets the boys laughing. You felt bad for Joe so you give him a kiss on the cheek but he stays seated with his arms crossed.

"Lighten up babe," you whisper to him. "You'll get it next time."

Jack is the one who initiates the trek to the nearby pub and even though you really just wanted to have a warm night in, you're pressured to come along.

By the time you get your second drink, Joe's already finishing his third and most of the boys have reached the tipsy stage of drunk. Joe keeps tugging at Caspar's hoodie strings, trying to tie them around his head. You bite back a smile and turn to Josh who's trying to figure out the song playing at the bar. Your only option for conversation was Jack.

"Do you see that girl?" Jack suddenly asks. Or maybe not. You look to where he not-so-subtly points to a girl sitting near the back. "She's cute."

"She's taken," you tell him.

"No she's sitting alone," he looks back at her. "Maybe I should-"

"Jack," you rest your hand on his arm. "She's watching the guy at the bar order drinks. She's with him."

It takes a moment for Jack to see it. When he turns around, he looks embarassed.

"What I wouldn't do to have you around when I'm at clubs in London," Jack rests his hand on top of yours. "You don't know how many times I've been threatened just for talking to some bloke's girl."

"Jack actually did get knocked out that one time," Josh says to his phone.

"Only once?" You ask. "I'm surprised it hasn't been more."

"Oi what's this," Joe joins in, pointing between Jack and you. Your hands still rest on one another's.

"Y/N just told Jack she needs a man who can ski," Josh teases.

"What?" Joe looks at you. "What's that?"

"Aw Joe, it's alright. You can move in with me." Caspar claps Joe on the shoulder.

You slide your hand out from Jack's and laugh. "Caspar you're sleeping with Josh."

"I don't mind," Josh pipes in which gets us all to laugh.

"I love this song!" Joe's distracted as an old song plays from the speakers. "Jack remember that time we-"

"Oh mate how could I forget," Jack and Joe seem to have an inside joke as they don't even let the other finish. They begin belting out the song and you all eventually join in.

You decide to stay seated as the evening goes on; you were content just watching Joe goof off with his mates and get progressively drunk. It begins with him belting songs and it moves on to him telling his friends about all the dance moves he can do and doing a terrible imitation of them. Joe was going to have a tough time tomorrow morning.

"Boys," you say as the clock reads 10. "I don't mean to end the party early but skiing is exhausting and I really need a warm bath."

"That sounds so perfect," Jack agrees.

"Let's go home!" Joe shouts.

"Let's go," Caspar seconds it. So you put your bulky coats back on and make the trek through the snow. Halfway through Josh's lanky body loses balance and tips forward into the snow. Joe decides to jump on top of him and Jack joins as Caspar films it.

Soon after, Joe tries to lift you up but the snow coming up to his calves and his intoxicated state tips the two of you over into the snow.

"Ugh, Joe!" You whine as you try to get up.

"You love the snow!" He reminds you. Just as you get up and manage to brush the snow off your bum, Joe tugs at your hand and you fall back down on top of him.

"You're so annoying," you tell him jokingly.

"Shut up and c'mere," he gives you a dopey smile as his gloved hand pulls your face down to his. You kiss him in the snow until a spray it hits the two of you.

"Your room is literally five minutes away," Josh calls out from a few steps away. Caspar stands beside you, the person behind the spray of snow.

"I'm gonna get you!" Joe shouts as you rush off of him and he scoops up loose snow to toss at Caspar. Suddenly snow is flying everywhere and you rush out towards Josh who walks ahead.

"I'm going to get a moment of peace with you," you tell him.

"Where'd you get that idea?" Josh asks as his arm comes down and releases what feels like a tonne of snow all over your head. It gets into the crack between your hood and your back.

"Josh!" You push him over but he barely moves so you gather snow to throw back at him but he's run off laughing so you just throw it in his general direction. You were cold and wet at this point and the orange light of the hotel looked like paradise.

As soon as you step into your hotel room you strip down to your sports bra and tights. You even debate skipping the hot bath for sleep as you fall into the soft covers.

"I don't think you've ever undressed that quickly for me," Joe laughs. He still stands by the door fumbling with his coat.

"Those clothes were wet and uncomfortable," you say. "I'm exhausted. You and your friends are a handful when you're all drunk. I've forgotten that."

"Aw sorry love," Joe makes his way towards you. "Should I run you your bath?"

"I'm too lazy now," you mumble, your eyes beginning to drift close as you hear the bath turn on. Suddenly you jerk up as cold hands sting your stomach.

"That's cold!" You yell and Joe jumps back, stumbling into the wall behind him.

"Y/N i'm sorry," he gushes. "My hands take bloody ages to warm up."

"Come here," you laugh, reaching out to hold his hand in yours. He stands in front of you as you clasp them and give them a kiss.

"Why have you still got your coat on?" You ask him.

"It's stuck," he tugs at the zipper that stays in place.

"Let me see," you stand up and tug at the zipper, trying to remove the fabric that's got stuck.

"I'm glad you came on the trip," Joe says suddenly, leaning forward to rest his forehead on yours.

"Yeah," you agree. You give the zipper another tug and it lowers slightly. "I didn't think the boys wanted a girl around but they said they don't mind."

"They love you," Joe says with conviction. "They don't mind."

"Good," with one last tug you get the zipper down and Joe steps out of his coat. He leaps onto the bed with a blissful sigh. You lay beside him and nuzzle your cold nose into his warm neck.

"That tickles," Joe chuckles. He turns to his side to look at you through half-lidded eyes as he cups your face. "You looked unbelievably hot out there when you were coming down the slopes towards me."

"Did I?" You found it cute when Joe got really mush-y with his feelings when he got drunk.

"Yeah. I told Caspar 'that's my girl' but he said 'that's my girl too' so I pushed him into the snow."

You laugh and bury your face back into Joe's neck. "Caspar and I were friends long before you and I knew one another." You tell him.

"You're still my girl," Joe says. He lifts your face to his and leaves a sloppy kiss on your mouth. The next moment, however, Joe scrambles off the bed and tugs your hand up. You get up, following him to the bathroom. He presents you the bathtub still filling with water as if he'd built it himself for you.

"A bath," Joe says proudly.

"Thank you love," you lean into him.

"That's for both of us," Joe tells you.

"Is it?" You ask as you bend down and try to take your tights off. Joe's eyes wander over your body and he pulls you towards him as soon as you finish tugging them off your ankle.

"You're beautiful," he mumbles as his lips go to yours again. His drunk hands fumble with your sports bra but it's too difficult so he gives up, opting to remove his own clothing instead. You chuckle at the small attention span Joe seemed to have at the moment.

"This feels amazing," Joe says as you take off the rest of your clothes and join him in the bathtub. The water sways back and forth but it soothes your tired muscles. You snuggle into Joe's chest as his hands-which were finally warm, encircle your waist. His lips leave kisses down your neck and over your shoulders.

"I love you," Joe mumbles against them.

"I love you too," you look to him. "Whether you can ski or not."

Joe shakes his head, "I'll be the best skiier these ski slopes have ever seen tomorrow." With every word Joe's pronounciation gets worse. He was adorable when he was like this, you thought.

To keep him happy, you nod seriously as you relax back into him, "Of course babe. Tomorrow you'll be the best."

[chocolatemillkk]

Baby Steps (JS)

Request 1: y/n is more of a thick girl, and one day buttercream squad comes over and joke about y/n weight and she always felt insecure about that so she stopped eating and started to work out really hard, nearly passing out and then joe finds about that...sometime later the buttercream squad comes over and she's afraid to spend time with them and joe says something like eat and then you can go, and boys are confused and then y/n and joe have argument...

Request 2: could you do a joe imagine where you meet the butter creams for the first time and they make you feel really insecure and you go home and joe has a go at them for being horrible

These two were similar-one more specific than the other so I've just combined them. Alsooo this could be a sensitive topic so a tw for anyone dealing w issues mentioned above! 💙

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Are you sure she can borrow a shirt?

The one line circles my mind over and over as I up the speed on the treadmill. I was never self conscious about my weight around Joe, he treated me like he would anybody else. And he only ever called me beautiful. But it was when his friends came over a few weeks ago, I'd decided to join them all. Joe and I had been dating for over a year but I rarely spent time with his friends. Joe mentioned something about me borrowing something of his if I wanted to have an early night and one of the boys made a comment low enough that Joe didn't hear but whether they intended or not-I had.

If Joe's not planning on wearing it anymore, somebody else had responded but by then my vision was too blurry to catch who said it.

My heart rate goes faster and faster as I pump my legs to keep up on the treadmill. There was a reason I didn't want to meet my boyfriend's friends but he thought it was long overdue.

Are you sure she can borrow a shirt?

I grab a salad in a cafe nearby and ride the tube to work. I drink three coffees-all black of course and the morning's negativity begin to wear off. I was in control; I was working out and eating very little which meant nobody could make fun of me soon.

My phone dings with a message on my way home from work. Joe's snapped me a picture of dinner's ingredients and my stomach churns at the sight of the carbs he's planning on loading it with. Are you sure she can borrow a shirt?

Y/N: I don't know if I can make it. I lie to my boyfriend. Well, I didn't actually know if I could make myself eat. Not exactly a lie, I reason with myself.

Joe: I can come over in the evening with a tupperware if you want?

I couldn't say no to that so I tell him yes. I enter my empty flat and decide to get some work done but as I sit in from of my screen I begin to feel nauseous. I grab a glass of water but the feeling creeps back up again. I should lie down.

I don't hear Joe enter but he rushes to me when he arrives. "Y/N, are you not well?"

My eyes flutter open to see the concern on my boyfriend's face so I quickly put a brave face on. "I was just taking a nap I'm alright." I sit up and grab the bags in his hand.

"I've bought dessert too in case you haven't had anything to eat." He follows me into the small kitchen.

"Oh I had a bite earlier maybe I'll have some later." I kiss him thanks but he pulls me back to him.

"You sure you alright? You've been acting funny the past few weeks." He makes sure I'm looking at him but I put on my biggest smile.

"Never been better," I say. I'd been working out twice a day and keeping my calories low. I was doing great.

Joe's continues to watch me intensely before kissing me tenderly. "I love you you know that?"

"I do," I laugh. "I love you but you know that."

"It's nice to be reminded," he says against my lips as he kisses me again. "If you're not too busy the boys are going out for drinks. You want to join?"

If Joe's not planning on wearing it anymore

"No I'm really busy," I say. "Maybe next time?" So Joe leaves to hang out and I finish up work before working out one last time. Before bed I make sure to toss the dessert, I didn't want it to tempt me.

•••

All throughout the week I decline Joe's offer to eat out or to go for drinks but on Sunday I have no excuse left. After the gym I head to Joe's place where he's prepared breakfast but after the first few bites I feel bloated so I stick to the coffee.

"Is it not good?" Joe asks me during breakfast.

"No it's amazing, I'm just not that hungry." I say. My guilty conscious nudges me, I was lying to Joe so much but I had to. He wouldn't understand.

"You're not...have you been eating?" Joe sounds hesitant but he holds my hand across the table.

"Yeah of course!" I put a piece of toast in my mouth to prove my point.

"You don't look so well," he says quietly.

"What's that mean?" I demand. I looked the best I had in ages, why didn't he like it?

"I just mean you don't look like you're well," Joe pleads but I shake him off and I stand up quickly. Too quickly. The blood rushes to my head and my knees buckle as my vision swims in black and I faint.

When I come to I'm on Joe's couch and he's pacing back and forth. I try to sit up but my head spins so I lay back down. "Y/N," Joe sits beside me. "What are you thinking?"

"I don't want to talk about it," I turn my head away but Joe goes on.

"Y/N listen to me. What you're doing isn't healthy! Don't think I haven't noticed your excuses and your salads and all the times you're at the gym! I understand if you want to get fit for yourself but what you're doing right now is not healthy do you not see?"

"You don't understand," I whisper.

"I do!" Joe jumps up. "I know what you're doing but I want you to understand it's not right, love! It hurts me to see you putting yourself through this unhealthy diet! You're beautiful Y/N I love you the way you are you don't need to starve yourself!"

"I do!" I lash out. "Don't you see the way people always look at us! They eye me thinking 'poor Joe why's he going out with somebody like that?' Don't you hear the things other people-even your friends say about me? You're perfect and toned and I'm flabby and just..." And without meaning to I begin crying. All the pressure I've put on myself finally hits and soon Joe has wrapped me up and is holding me close.

"I'm sorry you've felt this way," he tells me after I've calmed down. "Talk to me. And you need to take care of yourself. I love you just the way you are. I wish you would love yourself the same," Joe says to me as if reassuring the thoughts I'd just been having. "Promise me you'll try. Take it easy with baby steps. I don't want to lose you."

I look at Joe and he has tears in his eyes which mirror mine. I didn't want to lose him too. "I promise I'll try," I say and he kisses my forehead.

•••

It's hard at first, my stomach heaves at more than a few bites and my mind keeps whispering bad thoughts but because I promised Joe I try to eat a little bit at each meal. It becomes a thing between Joe and I for me to snap him my meals or boomerang me eating them and he joins in and sends them himself. But I do sometimes skip meals and I can tell Joe is still worried. Yet throughout the week I continue getting texts asking me if I ate and the gentle reminders help me. I continue going to the gym but I begin to feel better with the portions I take.

A few weeks later Joe invites me to his for an end-of-the-summer get together with his friends and I want so badly to say no but I'm forced to come. I dress in a long sleeved dress that comes to my knees and make sure to feel nice so any comments I can try to deflect. But as soon as I get to his flat I freeze outside the door, unable to open the it.

Are you sure she can borrow a shirt?

My heart races. Deep breaths. I reach for the door but it swings open.

"Oh, Y/N! Hey!" Caspar leans in for a hug. "Sorry just need to step out I forgot to get the beer."

I make my way in, butterflies working up a storm inside my stomach and my lungs restricting, making it harder to breathe. Suddenly a hand grabs my arm and I know by the shape of it it's Joe.

"Hey love, glad you came." He kisses me on the cheek.

"Yeah, here." I hand him the bottle of rosé I brought.

"You look gorgeous," Joe admires me and I'm suddenly embarassed for my earlier doubts. He kisses me more passionately this time and I get lost in it until I remember his friends were in the other room.

"I should go say hello," I laugh, wiping the lipstick from Joe's mouth. He pouts but we walk in anyway.

"Oh Y/N is here," one of Joe's friends calls out. "We were wondering when you'd show!"

"Hey," I wave at everybody who asks how I am.

"Y/N brought rosé, Jack will be seeing the bottom of this bottle." Joe jokes and all the boys laugh. The attention shifts and I let out a sigh. I was in the clear.

Everyone slowly relaxes, mostly me, after the alcohol runs freely and I get more comfortable with the boys. I only pick at the foods Joe's ordered in, drinking a few beers instead and I can feel Joe keeping an eye on me.

"You should get something in you if you're planning on drinking any more," Joe whispers to me once we've all gathered in front of his projector, scrolling through our phones with conversation scattered about.

"I'm fine," I say curtly. I didn't want Joe to bring it up, not in front of his friends.

"You're gonna throw up later and be hungover for days at the rate you're going," he says a little more aggressively.

"Don't worry." I say quietly and turn back to Jack who was addressing everyone.

"...and we should check out that new club in central," Jack calls out. Most of the boys are ready to go but Joe reminds them they said they'd help clean up after the mess they made when Josh dared Mikey and Conor to have a drinking contest.

I get up to clear away the table of bottles but Joe grabs my hand. He speaks low enough so only the two of us hear. "You have to eat something or you're not going out to drink more."

"So what?" I whisper but it must be louder than intended because a few of the boys look our way.

"Don't be difficult," Joe pushes me over to the side of the room. He leans in closer, "I'm not letting you go out if you don't eat something. I don't want to go over this again love."

"You're being a downer Joe," I cross my arms over my chest.

"Y/N if you don't eat something we're staying home," Joe raises his voice, unbothered if his friends hear anymore.

"What's happening?" Someone asks.

"Nothing! I'm talking to her," Joe says angrily.

"Don't treat me like a bloody child!" I say louder than a whisper. "I'm perfectly fine going!"

"Y/N I'm saying it because I care and you know that! Skipping meals is not healthy!"

"No! You're suffocating me! And why don't you just tell everyone some more!" I yell. I couldn't believe he'd said that out loud. I push past Joe and leave the room-why did anything I do seem wrong!? I start to cry and I definitely did not want his friends to see.

"Y/N!" Joe calls after me but I make my way out.

"How long..." I hear one of his friends ask and the embarassment washes over me in waves. I already felt so insecure in front of them and now this! The tears roll over and down my cheeks and I'm sobbing by the time I get to the bus stop.

My phone begins ringing but I silence it. I hated arguing with Joe and I didn't want to talk.

"Y/N!" A voice yells out from the top of the street. "Hold on!"

Joe's tint frame gets larger as he comes closer, out of breath. "Y/N I'm sorry."

"I hate arguing with you," I tell him.

"Me too," he pulls me in as soon as he reaches me. "I'm sorry I said that in front of my friends. I shouldn't have."

"It's okay," I say. "It's just easier said than done."

"I know," he rubs my back. "I want you to get better I'm sorry if I'm too pushy."

"Hey!" A shout from afar has us looking towards Joe's house. All his friends have gathered in a group. "We're all grabbing a bite then hitting the club. Are you two lovebirds joining?"

I can't stop the smile on my face. They were being understanding, they hadn't made fun of me. I'm relieved. I look to Joe and he's looking back at me for an answer.

"Yes!" I shout back and so Joe and I begin heading back towards them, hands looped together. Baby steps, I think. I had to get better with baby steps.