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sweetkpopmusings · 3 months ago

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stray kids soulmate aus | b. chan <3

a/n: i was knocked out by a migraine for days and the main motivation for me to get better was so i could write this au :,-) i love sweet chan and this prompt in particular has been a favorite of mine my whole life !!! i hope you enjoy it <33 pics not mine~

content: fluff, soulmate au | wc: 1.8k | warnings: none really! some mentions of food | pairing: soulmate!chan x gn!reader | requests: open

soulmates meet in dreams every night, but your paths won’t cross in waking life until the time is right.

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

whenever chan had a rough day, he would crave sleep more desperately than on his worst insomniac nights. today was one of those days. he couldn’t say that it was a bad day, but they were nearing the end of the tour, so his emotions and physical exhaustion were running high. he rushed through his nighttime routine, aching to fall asleep and see your face. he knew that, even if it were brief, being with you would keep him from completely falling apart.

“it’s about time you showed up!” you teased, grinning at chan when he walked into the living room you two designed.

“i’m really sorry, y/n,” chan sighed, falling onto the sofa, “these last few shows have messed with my sleep schedule more than i expected. i feel so bad that i haven’t been around as much.”

your heart broke when you saw his frown, “chan, i’m not mad. please don’t feel bad. i just miss hanging out with you, and this is the only place i can do it. i’m grateful for any time we get together during your busy schedule!”

“y/n…” chan’s frown turned into an adorable pout, “that makes me feel even more guilty. you can’t be so nice and understanding!”

you laughed when he put his head in his hands. you wrapped him into a hug, appreciating the giggles that escaped his lips at the close contact.

“i miss you more,” chan mumbled against your clothing.

you shook your head, which, surprisingly, chan noticed, “don’t disagree with me! it’s true!”

chan smiled widely when he saw you laughing. he paused to enjoy the sound of your laughter. then, once your laughs quieted, he held both of your hands in his.

“i promise that i’ll rest a ton once i’m back from tour, okay? i’ll be on break for a while, so i’ll make sure i am at your beck and call every time you sleep. i’ll do everything i can to make it up to you, to make up for the lost time. i swear.”

the combination of his grasp and sincere gaze was almost overwhelming. chan always made promises with his full heart, and you knew that to be especially true right now.

“i believe you,” you smiled, which prompted chan’s shoulders to relax, “thank you, chan. you don’t have to make it up to me. but you do need to get some more rest. i don’t want to have to scold you to take care of yourself the first time we meet!”

“you’re going to anyway, no matter what i do,” chan teased, laughing hysterically at your glare.

you moved the conversation into lighter topics, soaking up his presence. though the visit was once again fleeting, you two enjoyed your time together. it was always healing to be with chan. whether you spent your dreams seeing the world or relaxing in a familiar space, you woke up feeling rested, all thanks to spending the night with your other half.

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

after chan returned from tour, both of you happily settled into your normal routine. he kept his promise of resting more, much to your delight. rather than having to rush conversations, you could enjoy each other’s company throughout the night, only parting when your alarm went off in the morning. it was easy, natural. of course, there were days when the sunlight hit your eyes and left you feeling empty because that action alone separated you from your person. most days though, you beamed with gratitude because chan was recovering from his strenuous tour and returning to the happy-go-lucky man you knew him to be.

last night’s dream was particularly wonderful. you and chan strolled around your favorite neighborhood while he told you all his favorite stories from tour. your heart always soared when you listened to the way he talked about seeing stays and joked about the antics he and the boys got up to while traveling. truly, the best part of it all was seeing him happy. the sparkle in his eyes and the upbeat tone of his voice were like a rush of sugar, the sweetest thing in the world. you confessed this to chan when a comfortable silence fell over you, and the last thing you heard before waking up was the sound of him giggling, highlighted by chan’s blushing skin.

perhaps it was chan’s sweetness that had you craving a treat as soon as you opened your eyes. stretching and soaking in the peacefulness of the late morning, you decided to go to your favorite bakery. it was the weekend, after all, and you wanted to do everything you could to maintain the happy mood chan put you in. after getting ready, you made your way to the bakery. the familiar route allowed your mind to wander, unsurprisingly to thoughts of your sweet soulmate.

the first dream you shared with chan was when you were six years old. you swung back and forth on the swingset in a quiet playground, covered nicely by the shade of a large tree. from beside you, a voice you had never heard before asked can i swing here too? you looked over, curious and unalarmed. when you saw the boy with curly brown hair smile shyly at you, you felt the tiniest of butterflies flutter in your stomach. you nodded, introducing yourself when he sat down on the swing next to you, i’m y/n. what’s your name? he grew more confident after hearing your voice, grinning charmingly as he said, i’m chan. it’s nice to meet you, y/n. you two watched the clouds float by, calling out the shapes you saw. in your childhood innocence and bravery, you suddenly asked, are you my soulmate? even as an adult, you could never forget the way chan’s ears turned bright red. how heartwarming it was for him to blush at the word “soulmate!” you didn’t need to hear him say yes, because the pink on his cheeks and the hopefulness in his eyes told you everything you needed to know. you wondered, heart pounding in your chest, if he’d look at you like that the first time he saw you in the real world.

the sound of the bakery door’s bell ringing snapped you out of your reverie. you inhaled the decadent smells of the shop, fresh baked warmth fit for a saturday. your lovestruck thoughts of chan could wait. you had business to attend to.

you greeted the employees, browsing the items on display. you took your time, selected your treats, and paid at the register. the place wasn’t too full, so you figured you could take a seat at a table near the window to appreciate the cozy ambience for a bit. you scanned for the closest empty table, nearly falling over when you locked eyes with someone.

well, not just someone. chan.

your mouth opened, but you couldn’t produce anything more than a few stammering syllables. chan’s eyes were wide with shock, quickly twinkling with happiness. soon, he started laughing. the sound bubbled out of him as though he were a child set free in a candy store, delighted beyond belief. you started laughing too. before people started to stare, chan waved you over to his table, pulling out a seat just for you.

“fancy seeing you here,” chan giggled through the cheesy line.

you rolled your eyes, smile never leaving your face, “don’t get me wrong. it is absolutely the best surprise in the world to see you here right now. but how does drinking a large coffee count as resting?”

chan lifted the coffee cup between you two, “oh this? i only got this because i couldn’t find a nap buddy anywhere. it looks like my luck might have changed though.”

he winked, making you blush and giggle like a teenager. not wanting to let him have all the fun, you grinned and replied, “i guess my first official duty as your soulmate is getting you to take a nap, isn’t it?”

now it was chan’s turn to blush. your body flooded with fondness, seeing the way his ears turned bright red at the word soulmate as it had when he first heard you say it. chan accepted your order when they called out your name, excitedly commenting on how good your taste was. the pep in his step was visible, though anyone who saw you would say that your pace matched his exactly. you two practically skipped the whole way back to your place, conversation flowing as though seeing each other was your plan all along.

“can we take a second to talk about how crazy this is? that we finally met? after all these years, we’ve been only a handful of miles away from each other, and we met today?”

chan’s expression was full of glee and disbelief, and you agreed with his sentiment fully, “they really aren’t lying when they say you won’t meet until the time is right,” you paused, reminding yourself that this moment was real, “i do think it’s ridiculous we’ve practically been neighbors this whole time though. no wonder it always felt strange when you were on tour.”

chan pouted, “don’t remind me…that’ll make me feel even worse about leaving…” then, a smile replaced his pout, “at least now we know that every time i come back from traveling, i’ll be coming home to you!”

you returned his smile, only looking away to unlock your door. you slipped off your shoes and made room for chan to come inside. while you’ve dreamt of chan your whole life, nothing was more surreal than seeing him in your home. he looked so much like he belonged there, as though he had been inhabiting the space for as long as you. yet you stood there, staring, unable to believe that your dream had finally come true.

“what are you staring at, mon rêve?” chan asked, smiling sweetly.

“it’s just…” you walked across the room, meeting him halfway, “i can’t believe you’re here.”

chan hummed in agreement. without another word, he intertwined your hands, looking at you intently. you led him to your favorite nap spot, adjusting it so everything was just right. instinctively, your bodies molded together, finding comfort in the shared embrace. mere seconds after thank you left chan’s lips, you both slipped into sleep, breaths falling into your natural harmony.

you weren’t sure how much time had passed when you opened your eyes. it was strange, almost unnerving, to wake up from a dream that did not include chan. before the panic or sadness could settle in, you looked over to the man in your arms. you stared in awe at his lips curling up ever so slightly, his hair in disarray, and his chest rising to the beat of the precious heart you belonged to. every little detail of chan was at your fingertips, and it was more beautiful than any dream you had ever had.

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

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python333 · 1 year ago

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HAI! i rlly like your platonic 141 fics and I'm wondering if we could get some more dad price and/or brother gaz sleepy cuddles? :3

stretched too thin — python333

— — — —

synopsis gaz notices you overworking yourself one night and decides to step in before you end up pulling an all-nighter.

relationships platonic!gaz & gn!reader.

characters gaz.

word count 2.05k

warnings 2nd person pov [you/yours/yourself], usage of pet names [love, darling], usage of c/n [code name/call sign].

note oh my god im so sorry i disappeared for like. a month. ill try my best to not be gone for more than a week at a time, but with all of my schoolwork and just over all stress ive been experiencing lately, i dont know if ill be able to get fics out every week :< ill try my best though! please accept this fic as an apology—its another big bro gaz one!! special shoutout to everyone else who has an older sibling thats very distant with them, you and me are in the same boat fr!! also, last thing—im thinking about making a discord server where i announce when fics are being written and published and stuff, but i dunno if yall would join or anything, so if u would pls lmk!!

You haven’t left your office in five hours.

Recently—just about two days ago—you finished up an assignment fairly quickly and, as a result, had to write a detailed report of said assignment. It went over the mission you’d gone on, and listed off every major detail you could think of, though because you just can’t give yourself a break you were constantly thinking of other details you might’ve missed even though there was little chance you’d missed anything.

The mission wasn’t anything too important, honestly. It was originally going to be a week-long camp-out reconnaissance by an enemy task force’s base, obtaining information on their schedule and what they did throughout the day and whatnot. However, only a day into the mission, the small squad of soldiers that had accompanied you saw another small military group observing the same group you’d been observing.

So, naturally, you observed them as well. Aren’t you just the best multi-tasker?

The task force eventually found out about the other group, just a day later, while your squad was still in the clear to continue your observations. So, your mission had quickly come to a close—but, because of the circumstances under which the mission had come to a close, you were required to write an extremely detailed report on the other group and the group you’d been observing.

It would be an understatement to say you were tired. You’re exhausted.

Between the non-stop writing, the coffee sitting on your desk that’s been microwaved five times and has been refilled thrice, and the uncomfortable chair you’ve sat in that you have yet to replace, you’re extremely exhausted. Your movements are sluggish, your fingers aren’t as swift on the keyboard of your computer as they usually are, and worst of all—you still have more to write.

Your eyes stung and felt dry, your hands felt like they were going to stop working completely at any moment, and you were overall just exhausted.

You look over at the clock on your desk, and it reads 02:28 AM, indicating that you would only have about four hours to sleep if you went to bed now. I’m too far into this report to stop now, You tell yourself, sighing as you blink slowly at your computer screen, If only my vision didn’t keep getting blurry…

Suddenly, you hear a knock at the door. Your eyebrows furrow together in confusion, and for a second you think you’re hallucinating until the knock sounds once more.

Reluctantly, with a voice raspy from not using it almost all day, you call out, “Come in!”

Your voice is softer and quieter than you’d like it to be, but it doesn’t matter too much to you at this moment—at least, not in your foggy mind that still begs you for sleep, even when you have far more of your report to finish.

The door opens with a creak, and in walks Gaz.

“Sarg,” He greets you, not bothering to close the door behind him as he walks up to your desk, “Pleasure to see you for the first time in, what… three days?”

“Two days and eighteen hours,” You correct him, taking a moment to crack your stiff knuckles, not taking your eyes off of your monitor, “And you know you don’t have to call me ‘sarg’ or ‘sergeant’ or anything. We’re the same rank.”

Gaz promptly ignores you, “Right, well, anything over a day is way too long for me to go without seeing you. Why’re you all cooped up in here on your computer?”

“‘Cause I need to write a report on my assignment,” You briefly explain, before lightly goading Gaz, “Not all of us need a shit ton of attention every day like you do.”

“Ehh,” Gaz theatrically makes a thinking face, before shrugging, “Not sure what you mean by ‘us’, but alright.”

“By ‘us’, I mean everyone but you.”

“Surely that doesn’t include you, right?”

“It does.”

Gaz gasps quietly at your reply, before dramatically responding, “Oh, you can’t be serious.”

“I absolutely can,” You hum, finally taking your eyes off of your computer screen to look up at Gaz, “Is it so hard for you to believe that I don’t need to talk to you every waking hour?”

“It is, actually,” Gaz scoffs, “Because I know that you do need to talk to me every waking hour.”

“Uh, no I don’t,” You childishly argue, raising an eyebrow at Gaz.

“Uh, yes you do,” Gaz immaturely argues back, crossing his arms, “Look me in the eyes and tell me that the past two days and eighteen hours haven’t been shit because I haven’t given you any attention.”

You open your mouth to form a response but quickly close it, realizing that yeah, actually, I kind of do crave his attention.

Fuck.

“You’re not the only person that gives me attention,” You point out, hoping to find some way to change the subject.

“Sure, but you like the attention I give you the most,” Gaz hums, leaning forward to rest his crossed arms on your desk opposite of where you sit.

“You don’t know that.”

“Then tell me that I’m wrong,” Gaz challenges you.

You narrow your eyes at him, glaring at him for a moment before sighing, “You suck.”

“Maybe I suck, but you look like you haven’t slept for the past week,” Gaz points out, “You look exhausted, by the way. And dehydrated. Actually, you just look like the human embodiment of a headache.”

“What the fuck?”

“I mean that in the most loving, non-offensive way possible.”

“You come into my office, accuse me of needing attention from you, then you insult me by calling me the human version of a headache?”

“It wasn’t an insult!” Gaz raises his hands in surrender, before sighing, “I’m being serious. You look dead, [c/n]. You need sleep.”

“What I need is to finish this report,” You huff out, beginning to turn your attention back to your computer, before Gaz’s hand is quickly placed on your chin and forces you to look back at him.

“No, what you need is some rest,” Gaz argues, more serious this time, taking his hand off of your chin—something you shouldn’t miss nearly as much as you do, the warmth of his hand fading far too quickly from your face—and bringing it back to rest on the desk.

“Maybe you need rest, Gaz.”

“Sure I do,” He shrugs, “But I’m only going to sleep if you do.”

You raise an eyebrow at him, “Really? You’re pulling that card?”

“I am.”

You stare at him for a moment, mentally weighing your options, before sighing and bringing your elbows up to the table so that you can place your forehead in your hands.

On one hand, if you stay in your office you can finish up your report before four and then go to sleep, and hope that you magically feel active even with just an hour or two of sleep in the morning. On the other hand, if you go to sleep now, so does Gaz, and then you both get more than just two hours of sleep.

After another moment of consideration, you huff out a frustrated breath and mutter, “Fine.”

Gaz smiles down at you and walks around your desk to your side of it, holding out a hand for you to grab to help yourself up from your chair and using his free hand to save your report and power off your monitor.

You take his hand and stand up, your legs a little weak and balance iffy from sitting down for so long, but within the next few minutes you’re sure you’ll be able to properly walk. You let go of his hand once you’re positive you won’t fall over, and once he sees that you’re able to walk, Gaz silently walks towards the door of your office. Just as quietly, you follow him.

He turns off the lights for you and lets you walk out of the office first, locking the door from the inside and closing it once you’re out. Once he’s done, he takes the lead again and you follow him down to his sleeping quarters. It’s not too long of a walk there, only two minutes at most.

Once you’re there, Gaz opens the door and lets you walk in first. Once you’re inside and Gaz has closed the door, you shrug off your camouflage patterned jacket and toe off your already loosened tan boots, leaving you in just your camouflage cargo pants and army green undershirt.

You look down at your pants with a frown, knowing from experience that sleeping in them was incredibly uncomfortable and left you regretting your whole existence the morning after, but before you could even look over at Gaz to tell him of your situation, you felt something being thrown at you.

You immediately turn your attention to the item that had been hurled at you—the item in question being a pair of gray sweatpants, some that would probably be a little bit looser than you’d prefer on your figure—and then look over at Gaz with a questioning look.

“Figured you wouldn’t wanna sleep in that,” Gaz shrugs, nodding to your cargo pants in response to your nonverbal confusion.

You hum in appreciation, not wanting to talk too much at the moment, instead waiting for Gaz to look away before slipping off your pants and replacing them with the sweatpants Gaz had thrown at you. The fit isn’t as uncomfortable as you thought they’d be—they’re loose and hang low on your hips, just like you thought they would, of course, but they don’t feel nearly as weird as you thought they would.

Once you’ve tightened the strings on the waist of the pants, you get into Gaz’s bed, pulling the covers up and over yourself. Gaz quickly settles into the bed next to you, quickly getting himself comfortable under the sheets, and pulling the covers up and over his shoulders in one swift movement.

He gets closer to you, so close that his chest presses against your back and you can feel the tip of his nose ghosting over the top of your head. He wraps one arm over your body to pull you impossibly closer to him, and his other arm snakes underneath the side of your body so that both of his arms are wrapped around you.

He hums contently and his thumb rubs small circles into your clothed stomach, the action—despite being small—causing your stomach to warm up almost immediately.

“Comfortable, darling?” Gaz asks quietly, pressing a soft kiss to the top of your head.

“Very,” You mumble back, trying to subtly lean your head back against Gaz in hopes of getting at least one more kiss. Noticing your efforts, he huffs out a small laugh and presses another gentle kiss right at the edge of your hairline before pressing one last one to your forehead.

Even with the comforting atmosphere, you can’t find it within yourself to fully relax, your body still tense and stiff underneath the blanket. Gaz, just like he did with your “subtle” movements, notices and frowns.

“Just sleep,” Gaz tiredly mumbles into the top of your head, “You have to get up in three hours. The sooner you sleep, the more sleep you get.”

You don’t respond, instead simply sighing and forcing your eyes closed. You do have to admit, it’s nice being able to actually close your eyes for something other than blinking, and closing your eyes for longer than half a second has made you realize that they were even drier than you thought they were.

Exhausted and ready to finally sleep, you eventually get to a point where you no longer need to force your eyes shut, and as a result, your whole body relaxes for the first time in almost six hours.

“G’night, love,” Gaz murmurs, feeling your body relax next to his. You hum in acknowledgment of his words, not finding the energy within yourself to properly respond, instead finding yourself drifting off into a deep sleep.

And if four hours later, Gaz wakes up and simply lies there, not waking you and instead letting you get some more sleep despite you having to be up soon, nobody has to know.

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sequinsmile-x · 2 years ago

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congrats on 500 followers! can i pls request 28: feeling for each other in the dark ?

Thank you <3

I hope you enjoy this!

Posting this now because I'm posting a smutty one later that I got carried away with (which I'm sure will surprise no one)

Details on how to submit a prompt can be found here, along with a list of ones that have already been requested

-x-

Words: 920

Read over on Ao3, or below the cut

She was furious at him.

The worst part was, he knew he deserved it. That his outburst at the precinct in front of the team and the local cops had been unnecessary, something he wishes he could have taken back the second he’d spoken harshly to her.

Everyone was on edge. More victims than there had been in a while, the unsub devolving at such a rate they were struggling to keep up. Emily had watched Aaron closely, concern for her husband mounting as he worked harder than anyone, staying late at the precinct and arriving early, as the weight of his own expectations threatened to crush him. She’d glowered at him when she arrived one morning, coffee in hand for each of them, to find he was wearing exactly what he had the day before. Confirming her suspicions when she woke up in an empty hotel room bed that he’d never joined her at all.

She’d spent the last few days making sure he ate and drank, lovingly switching out coffee for bottles of water throughout the day. Looking after him silently, something they always did for each other, so he could do what he needed to do.

She lasts until the fourth day they are there before she says something, watching him intently as he dismisses everyone else for the evening but makes no move to go back to the hotel himself. She asks if he’s going to, and his response is terse. His explanation that he was the boss and didn’t answer her said through his teeth. He only realises what he’s said when he sees the look on her face, a brief flash of hurt that only he could draw out of her before she nods tightly and leaves without further comment.

He ends up leaving the precinct a couple of hours after everyone else, exhaustion he’d never admit to deep in his bones. He flicks on the light in their hotel room, and he can’t help but smile at the sight of his wife, fast asleep and curled away from his side of the bed.

He gets ready for bed quickly, his gaze lingering on his reflection in the mirror as he brushes his teeth, the bags under his eyes clear to see even in the low light. He climbs into bed with her and switches the light off, plunging the room into darkness. The only sound in the room is Emily’s breathing, the slight snoring she’d always deny filling the space. He lets it relax him, and allows himself to bask in her presence in a way he hadn’t in days.

She was his solace, his cornerstone.

Guilt for how he had spoken to her fills his chest, his lungs stuffed full of it. He reaches out for her in the dark, his hand coming to rest on her shoulder, and he squeezes the joint gently. Trying to press his love into her skin, to let her know how much he loved her even in her sleep.

He leans over and kisses her forehead before he turns to roll away from her, determined to get some sleep, but she grabs his hand, feeling out for him in the dark as she snuggles into his side, wrapping herself around him like a vine.

“Hi,” she says, her voice cracking with sleep, a sound that was so familiar to him now he couldn’t imagine his life without it.”

“Hi,” he says, punctuating it with another kiss on her forehead, “Did I wake you up?” He asks quietly, and she nods against him. “Go back to sleep, love.”

“It’s ok,” she murmurs, tightening her hold on him. Throwing her arm and her leg over him and shifting closer, “I’m glad you’re here.”

“I thought you were angry at me,” he says, his lips against her temple as his hand sneaks under her t-shirt, his palm warm against her skin.

“I am,” she mumbles, her words slightly slurred, a sure sign she was still on the edge of sleep, “Very angry.”

He’s glad it’s dark, that there’s no way she would be able to look up and see the smile that spreads across his face at the slight petulance in her tone, knowing it would do nothing to make her any less annoyed.

“But…you still want to snuggle?” He asks, running his hand up and down her back, something he knew would slowly lull her to sleep.

She hums in response, sinking further into his side, “Yes.”

“It’s a shame people would never believe me if I told them how much of a snuggler you are.”

“You’d better not,” she mumbles, “I’ve got a reputation to uphold.”

Aaron kisses her hairline, taking the time to breathe in the scent of her. The smell of the shampoo that now lived in the caddy in his shower next to his. The lingering remnants of her perfume and something that was uniquely her invading his senses.

“Sweetheart?” He says quietly, and for a moment he thinks she’s fallen asleep, but she nods against him, a sound of acknowledgement in her throat, “I’m sorry. For earlier.”

He feels her smile against his neck and she removes her hand from his chest, aimlessly patting his cheek in the dark. He grabs her hand and kisses her palm, smiling against her skin.

“I know,” she replies, kissing his neck, “We’ll talk about it in the morning.”

He lowers their now linked hands to his chest, “Ok sweetheart, in the morning.”

-x-

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astronomy-two-worlds-apart · 2 years ago

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okay idk how to even begin explaining how stressed out i’ve been and how close i am to crying. well how much i’m crying now

i feel like such a failure i’m gonna fail probably a few classes and like. i just suck. two projects. one was due in school like physically and the other is due in less than 3 hours from typing this. i’ve had all afternoon and done nothing but sit on the couch and do nothing. my teachers already question my work ethic and i’ve been told it sucks by some teachers. like what am i doing.

i’ve been having sleep issues meaning i can’t sleep half the time and the other half of the time i’m in bed by 9. awake by 3 or 4 but still. what the hell.

i try to eat enough but jesus eating meals really sucks. it always feels like i’m eating too much food and i’m gonna be sick. i don’t usually have like stuff or time or want to eat throughout the day either. and like my mom keeps saying “oh you have to eat or you’re gonna get sick” which yes i know but i’m not not eating as a form of self harm im not eating in a i will be sick way.

which speaking of being sick i literally have so much anxiety over that lately. there’s flu strep covid and god knows what else going around and yes i wear a mask but it still stresses me out so much to think that i could get sick. there’s always people coughing and sneezing from being sick. like they’re out and then they come back still a little sick and it makes me paranoid.

and of course there’s more academic issues bc failing to turn in projects is only one of the concerns. i have to take 5 or 6 finals next week all in the span of two days. two fucking days for 6 different tests. about 4 different reviews that i have to start and complete before the testing days.

i have to go to the store for multiple things, so money spending when i know for a fact that’s something my parents are stressing over and the reason why i purposely avoided telling them about the band disney trip money payments and stuff until it was too late. so they wouldn’t worry about like 3000-4000 dollars going to that in the next 4 months. am i upset bc i don’t get to go to disney and it was a trip i really wanted to go on? yes but i also don’t want my parents having another thing to use against me if i fuck up so they don’t spend money and i can’t get blackmailed win win i guess.

oh and a christmas concert on tuesday. and no the music doesn’t sound good. he’s gonna call a surprise sectional probably monday after school after the dress rehearsal and then get pissed when people can’t make it. he’s lowkey an asshole for that too so everyone’s gonna be upset over that. and it’s his fault for passing out music two weeks before the concert knowing damn well there’s other stuff going on.

i keep accidentally ignoring all my friends and feel bad for telling myself “i don’t actually care. like yes to a certain extent i care about everything they’re saying bc they’re my friends but at the same time i don’t as much as i should.” i keep like almost sabotaging myself and my life and it’s such an issue.

holy shit. i’m tired. i just need to have a way to exist outside from society. people are tiring. living is exhausting and i’m not even doing it properly bc i keep purposely/subconsciously messing everything up. why is it all just like this.

#self harm mention #sick tw #ask to tag #vent

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queen-haq · 3 years ago

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Fic: A Woman Scorned - Part 16

Pairing: Billy Russo x Reader

Rating: R for language and smut.

Words: ~3100 words.

Summary: You’ve been sleeping with Billy Russo for a few months now. Knowing his aversion to emotional commitments, you’re satisfied with your clandestine arrangement until you catch him having dinner with Dinah Madani one night. Then it finally dawns on you. It’s not that he doesn’t want to commit, he just doesn’t want to commit to *you*.

Billy may think he knows you, but he has no idea what he’s just lost…

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10 Part 11 Part 12 Part 13 Part 14 Part 15

gif credit: @benbarnxs

Part 16

You were straddling Billy, riding him, your hips undulating atop his body. His fingers tightly gripped your waist, getting ready to take charge so you were underneath him, but you refused to submit. Instead you grabbed his hands and pinned it above his head. As you hovered above him, he arched up to kiss you but you shifted back, instead staring down at him intently. He growled at you before he rolled over unexpectedly, taking you along with him.

As he thrust into you, harder and rougher each time, you began to slide off the bed. In your new position, you caught sight of Adam on the floor. His corpse was wrapped up in a rug, only his head sticking out-

“Hey.” Billy pulled you up so you were now sitting across his lap, facing him. “Look at me. Only me.”

Only a few seconds ago he was biting you as you clawed at him, both of you desperate to possess each other. Your movements had been savage, animalistic even, but now Billy was kissing you languidly, his hand brushing the back of your hair while the other settled on the small of your back. You were directing the rhythm of the thrusts now, setting a slower pace so you could fully enjoy the feel of his cock stretching your insides oh-so-tantalizingly. Your forehead braced against his, you closed your eyes and lost yourself to the flood of emotions that overcame you.

***

It was after midnight. Billy had come home with you and both of you were in bed, you nestled against him while he spooned you from behind. Even though you were tired, you couldn’t sleep. Your brain was working overtime processing everything that happened in the last few hours. He stirred next to you, dropping a tender kiss on your bare shoulder.

“What’s wrong?” he murmured. You may have been fully alert but he sounded absolutely exhausted.

“Are you sure they’ll be thorough with the cleaning?”

“Yeah.” Throwing his arm over you, he covered your hand with his. “These guys are not amateurs. They know what they’re doing. There won’t be any traces of us left in that room.”

“And Adam’s body-”

“Will be disposed of.”

“But how do you know you can trust these guys? What’s stopping them from blackmailing-”

“’cause money talks, babe. That crew is very well paid.” He squeezed your palm. “I’ve used them in the past. No trouble yet.”

With his military career you were already aware of his violent past, but you also sensed he had a long hit list aside from that. When he’d realized your plans for Adam, he hadn’t been remotely shocked at the idea of you killing another person. In fact, as you stabbed Adam repeatedly, Billy had looked at you with such pride and reverence that it had left you breathless.

“What we did tonight, you know what that means, don’t you?”

His voice brought you out of your reverie. You exhaled a deep breath, drawing circles on his palm. “That we’re bad people.”

“No, we’re survivors. We take down anyone who gets in our way.”

“He didn’t come after you,” you reminded him. “You didn’t have to get involved.”

He turned you around to face him. “Nobody threatens you and gets to live after that.”

Your heart pounded in your chest. When he looked at you with such intensity, you were almost ready to believe anything.

He cradled your face, his thumb caressing your bottom lip. “We’re connected now. Forever. Because of tonight.”

You didn’t understand how his words could evoke such conflicting emotions within you. On one hand your stomach fluttered with excitement, he was saying things you’d wanted to hear for a long time, but then there was the fear. Doubt. Uncertainty. You forced a smile, hoping some levity would lighten the situation. “You make it sound like we’re married or something.”

Disgust flooded over his face. “Fuck, no. Marriages end. One day you’re bragging about being in love, next it’s all over. It’s not based on anything real. But we are.” He reached for your hand, which was resting on the pillow between you and him, and intertwined his fingers through yours. “I saw you tonight, the real you. And you saw me. No pretenses, no boundaries. And you didn’t run. You didn’t even flinch.”

“Neither did you.” You lifted your eyebrow. “You were rock hard.”

“I always am around you.”

His words made the heat rise in your cheeks, which he noticed right away. Giving you a teasing smile, he leaned in closer to give you a peck on the cheek. “Are you blushing?”

“Shut up.”

Billy’s eyes remained locked on you, simply staring at you with sleepy eyes. “I don’t like who I was when I thought I lost you. I couldn’t eat, couldn’t work. Every time I closed my eyes I imagined you fucking this other guy, kissing him. Even the thought of you talking to him made me want to burn it all down.”

Your heart ached at how tired he looked. Scooting closer, you started massaging his forehead. When he closed his eyes, you dropped a gentle kiss on each of his eyelids, the beauty mark just below his right eye, before snuggling him tightly in your arms. “Sleep, Billy.”

“You’ll be here when I wake up?” he murmured drowsily.

You smiled. “It is my apartment.”

He didn’t respond, already fast asleep. You tried to do the same but couldn’t; there were too many thoughts running around in your brain. You had assumed you’d feel guilty about taking a life; you didn’t. You remembered the vicious, contemptuous anger in Adam’s eyes when he’d held you at gunpoint, and how he’d threatened to kill others in your team, and all you felt was relief. Relief that he was dead and no longer a danger to you.

Billy stirred next to you, drawing your attention. You reached out to hold him, your touch feather-light so as not to wake him up. He looked calm and peaceful, unlike the haunted and distraught way he appeared earlier in the hotel room. It was still hard to digest that he’d been so unhinged at the thought of losing you. But the thing that resonated with you the most was that he hadn’t been able to hurt you despite all of the anger he’d felt. Growing up the way you had, you were always on alert for things to turn violent at any moment. One wrong comment or an innocent gesture - hell even a lone pair of sock on the floor - had the potential to trigger your father’s temper and turn things violent. During those moments his rage was uncontrollable, and as a result you always worried about how people reacted when they were furious. The fact that Billy hadn’t hit you even though he’d been completely enraged made you realize you were physically safe with him.

Maybe emotionally as well. For so long you’d had difficulty believing he could reciprocate your feelings yet you couldn’t ignore how devastated he’d been. Nor could you rationalize away his emotions. It still felt surreal but he did truly care about you, and the thought filled you with warmth and made your heart soar with happiness.

You brushed your lips against his, hoping Billy’s comforting presence next to you would help you relax. However, fifteen minutes later sleep still alluded you. Eventually you decided to do something useful and work instead. Carefully sliding out of bed so you didn’t disturb him, you tip-toed out of the bedroom. Immediately you felt the soreness in your body, an after effect of the rough sex you had with Billy in the hotel room earlier. Grabbing a nearby throw, you were soon nestled in your favourite spot on the chaise lounge, working away on your laptop.

An hour later you heard footsteps behind you and you turned around to find Billy yawning, clad in boxers, his hair all ruffled.

“Why aren’t you in bed?” he grumbled.

You scooted over to give him space to sit on the chaise but he seemed to have other ideas in mind as he took a seat behind you. You found yourself settled between his legs, your back nestled against his chest, as he caressed down the length of your arms.

“I couldn’t sleep. Figured I might as well do something useful.”

“What corporate shit are you working on?” he teased, playfully grabbing your laptop to look at your screen. You smacked his arm right away, shutting the screen and pushing the laptop away.

Billy purposely rubbed his face against the base of your neck and you started giggling at the sensation of his prickly beard on your bare skin. “Stop,” you whined. “It tickles.” you squealed loudly, trying to jump out of his arms but he held you in a tight grip.

Finally he stopped, and as you struggled to catch your breath, you slapped his arm playfully. “You’re such a jerk.”

He chuckled, hugging you tightly from behind. “That’s for ignoring all my calls since Tuesday.”

“I’m still not unblocking your number,” you retorted. His beard scraped along your shoulder, making you squeal again. “Okay, fine. Sorry!”

“Swear that you’re not gonna block me again.”

You turned around in his arms, resting on your knees as your arms looped around his neck. Smiling down at him, you nuzzled your nose with his. “Swear that you won’t act like an asshole again.”

“Can’t really do that.”

“Exactly.” He tucked your hair behind your ear. Butterflies fluttered in your stomach at the tender affection on his face, the warmth of his gaze spreading slow, languid heat throughout your body. “You should go back to bed. You still look tired.”

“I’ve had a rough week.”

You pouted your lips. “I know. I’m sorry.”

“Want to make it up to me?” he asked, cocking his eyebrow at you.

”How? By sucking you off?” you teased, running your fingers through his hair.

“Move in with me.”

Your hands stilled on him, finding it hard to breathe all of a sudden. At first you thought he was joking but the solemn expression on his face made you realize otherwise. You moved away, putting much needed distance between the two of you.

“That’s not funny, Billy.”

Maintaining a rigid posture on the chaise lounge, he shrugged his shoulders. “Not meant to be. I’m dead serious.”

“You know that’s ridiculous, right?”

“Why? ‘cause I wanna keep you safe?”

“The threat is gone. I took care of it.”

“We took care of it,” he said pointedly. “A threat which you didn’t even tell me about.”

“I explained that to you already.” Feeling defensive, you started pacing the floor. “You promised you’d have your guy stop tailing me.”

“Sure. As soon as I know you’re not gonna keep things from me again. You moving in will help with that.”

“So if I don’t move in, you’ll have me followed 24/7?” Anger surged through you, you were so furious you wanted to scream. “That’s fucking blackmail.”

“Relax. No need to be so dramatic about it.”

You grabbed the closest cushion you had and flung it at him, enraged by his patronising tone. “We barely know each other-”

“Are you fucking kidding me?” he interjected, finally moving to stand up. His eyes were pitch black, his jaw clenched. “You and I killed someone tonight! You took my hand, my knife, and we stabbed the bastard in the heart with it, together. We fucked while he drew his last breath and now you’re feeding me this bullshit?” He stormed towards you. “No! I’ve seen your darkness and you’ve seen mine. There’s no one else in this world that knows us better than we know each other.”

You shook your head, flabbergasted by his reaction. “This is insane. I can’t move in with you. We haven’t even gone out on a real date because you said I was boring!”

“If you believe that then you really are a fucking idiot!”

You stiffened, his words ringing in your ear. Fucking idiot. Something your father used to call you repeatedly, his tone full of hate and vitriol when he lashed out at you. It started with a fucking idiot then spiralled into bitch and whore and everything else hurtful under the sun. You swore to yourself you’d never accept being spoken to like that by another person yet here you were, being insulted again by someone who was supposed to care about you.

You retreated back from Billy, careful to keep your distance from him, and leveled him with a cold glance. “Don’t you ever talk to me like that again.”

Your voice may have been deceptively calm but there was a storm brewing inside you. You desperately needed some space. As you moved away from Billy and headed to the kitchen, he tried to block your path but you immediately pushed him away. “Don’t touch me!”

You quickly sidestepped past him and entered the kitchen, heading for the cabinet where you kept your bottle of whiskey. Pouring yourself a glass, you slowly sipped the liquid to soothe your frayed nerves and forget the memories Billy had just unleashed in you.

***

Even as the words left his mouth, Billy knew he’d made a mistake. He regretted what he said instantly, even more so when he realized how much the words had stung you. The last thing he wanted was to cause you pain but he couldn’t seem to help himself. The more he tried to hold on to you the more you slipped through his fingers.

After giving you a few minutes to calm down, he entered the kitchen behind you. You were standing in the opposite corner, drinking the hard stuff, which further signalled how shaken you were. Billy knew Scotch wasn’t something you enjoyed, you only drank it when you were messed up.

“I’m sorry,” he apologized. “I shouldn’t have said that. It won’t happen again. I swear.”

You didn’t acknowledge him, and it hurt like hell.

“When I think about you pulling away from me, it makes me lose my mind.” He swallowed audibly, desperately trying to get through to you. “I’m all in when it comes to us but it feels like you always have one foot out the door.” He took hesitant steps towards you while your eyes still remained on the countertop, refusing to meet his gaze. “I keep fucking up but I’ve never felt this way before. I don’t know what I’m doing. I just can’t lose you, Y/N.”

“I’m not built like you, Billy,” you finally spoke, turning to look at him. “I have doubts. I’m constantly dealing with insecurities. It takes me time to trust people, and I just can’t rush into things head-on.”

“And I’m someone who hustles. I go after everything I want with guns blazing. If I didn’t, I wouldn’t have Anvil.”

“But I’m not a thing, Billy. I’m a person, and you can’t push me into doing stuff I’m not ready for.”

He exhaled a resigned sigh. “I know. It’s ‘cause I get paranoid when it comes to you. You’re a closed book and you never tell me anything.” His eyes scanned yours, his stomach clenched with anxiety. “I don’t even know how you feel about me.” It was the first time he’d voiced that thought, something he didn’t even realize he felt until this very moment. You wanted him, that he knew, and you’d even confessed you loved him once but he didn’t really believe in that bullshit. What mattered to him was if you needed him as much as he did you. The idea of not having you in his life drove him insane, but did you feel the same way? He didn’t think so and it bothered the fuck out of him.

You set your glass down on the counter before reaching out to cradle his face, your soulful eyes meeting his emotional gaze. “I want to be with you, Billy. I like you so much that it scares me.”

Your words brought with them a tidal wave of relief that swept over him like a calm breeze. It was like he could breathe again. He pulled you close, his forehead against yours as he simply held you. “Don’t be scared, babe. I don’t bite.”

“That is a complete fucking lie,” you retorted. “I still have the marks from earlier to prove it.” Your smile faded again as you held his stare. “But I need you to be patient with me. You can’t bully me or get mad if I don’t want to rush into things.”

He nodded his head. “I won’t.”

“I’ve only ever had myself to rely on. And the thought of trusting you? Relying on you? It scares the hell out of me. Because there’s always a voice in my head that’s reminding me I need to go back to being alone when we end things.”

“I need to kill that voice.”

You chuckled, reaching out to loop your arms behind his back. “It shuts up eventually. It did in the hotel room when I saw how fucked up you were without me. That’s when it sunk in you actually do like me.”

“It took you that long to believe it?”

You gave him a sad smile. “Yeah. You did tell me I was boring.”

He groaned right away, regret washing over him. He should never have said those fucking words to you. “You’re not boring. You’re smart. And hot.” He kissed your left cheek. “And sweet. And funny. And mine.” Then the right cheek. “And when you lecture me about cybersecurity, I get so hard.”

“Whatever. You’re the one who wanted to know more about the topic,” you grumbled.

He grinned, giving you a tender peck on the lips. “I can listen to you talk for hours and hours-“

“Shut up.” You pressed your palm over his mouth.

Wrapping his arms around you, he lifted you off the ground and started carrying you back to the bedroom. “Forever actually, if you’re naked.”

“Not once have I lectured you naked.”

He dropped you on the bed. “Yeah, exactly. Time you start.” He jumped into bed, rubbing his beard on your face again as you started squealing.

A few minutes later you were both panting for air, staring up at the ceiling. “Just to make it clear, I’m not moving in,” you huffed through laboured breaths.

He turned to look at you, smirking. “Fine, but I’m taking you out tonight. Proper date and all.”

The most beautiful smile graced your face. “Yeah?”

“Yeah.” You were a ray of sunshine beaming up at him and Billy’s heart felt so full he worried it would explode. If he could, he’d freeze this moment forever.

Part 17

A/N - As always, your wonderful feedback is what keeps me inspired to write and post consistently. I was initially nervous about this chapter because the characters experience a gamut of emotions but it was necessary. I hope you like and enjoy this chapter. Feedback, as always, is very much appreciated and feeds my soul :)

Tag list:

@yourfavoritefruitybitch @voyevoda-thejoy @adreamemporium @queenmalhinewahine @gubleryum @galaxyjane @xceafh@maralisa124@tomhollandisabae @daybleedsintonightfa11 @lil-baby-nor @all-art-is-quite-useless @tanyaherondale @nashibirne @dour-trash @thetallassgirl @athenamikaelson @agent-jbarnes @primadonnasdream @aleksanderwh0r3 @elisemockingbird @nihilismworld @archisur@nemesis729 @lysawayne@kaqua @ladyblablabla @lemasonda@advictedtohim @24-martie @tarkanelima-blog @shinebrightlikeafanbase @krystal-clear1 @damalseer@dontjinx-it@darkishx @wanderlusting-about-life @thatguppienamedbae @happypepperdog @bat-revival @sassygirl25 @consulting–heroes @the-celestial-kitsune @mackaywhore @ablxssm @competitive-dust @red-head011 @exo-1204 @sunsetenigma @millieb-3199 @chatnain @licensedcheek @tinkertailor1212 @vertesalope @safetyhtom @acourtofglassandroses @eliwinchester-barnes @finnismyoriginalsin @weallhaveadestiny @beananacake @beauty-and-the-beast97 @smurfelle @fire-treasure-iii @charly-0 @kestrafagnor @pigwidgeonxo @damagelove @allegra-writes @pensandthings @jad3djay @batshitbarnes @kashimayuki @secretsthathauntus @odetostep @awesome-eccia @mackaywhore @stories-you-wont-hear @vvsdiamond28 @supernaturalcat7 @arieltwvdtohamflash @iknownoqueenbutthequeeninme @devs-stufff @ticosas @moodacheeks @myakai13 @carlywhomever @fvckthisbxtchup @its-evita-here @papapapadumb @talesfrommycell @bat-luna-cat @fific7 @elluvians @dailydoseofchoices @everythinghappens-love @papapapadumb @mylife-love-and-other-things @bigcreatorwombatdreamer @ancientbeing10 @natty2245 @stuckysavedmylive @kasslucilfer @simp-for-ben-barners @originaldeputycalzoneegg @bdffkierenwalker @kimoranelson03 @sadbi-hours @haushinka27 @haushinka27 @caylaxwrites @extraneousred @agentmstark @crazywitchkitty @its-an-idea-not-a-blog @partypoison00 @fictional-hooman @hoglady @helnicks @luckyfreakfishpeach @chiquitita18 @rachlovesactors @icecream50055 @doloreschanal @lupinsfavslytherin @swthxrry @wanderlusting-about-life @dreamer7black @leahnicole1219 @superawesomegeek @weallhaveadestiny @toxicenough @tiiffanym @dark-twisted-and-mechanical-mind @cap-just-said-language

#billy russo x reader #billy russo #ben barnes #the punisher #the punisher fanfiction #a woman scorned

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dreamescapeswriting · 4 years ago

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Stray Kids Reaction | Crying During An Argument [Request]

Stray Kids x GN!Reader

CHAN:

Chan walked through the door of his bedroom to find you fast asleep in his bed, while usually he would be pleased to see you laying there waiting for him tonight it only seemed to piss him off. He slammed the door behind him and walked into the living room, throwing himself onto the sofa to sleep instead.

"Channie?" You mumbled as you rubbed your eyes, coming out to see who was banging about, it was 3 am and he'd been home to the dorms late every night this week. Not that you had been there but the boys had been keeping you up to date on what your boyfriend got up to when you weren't around.

"What are you doing here? I told you I was busy this week," He grumbled as he laid flat on his chest, face squished between the pillows, you let out a yawn as you tried to speak.

"I told you I was coming, I text you. If you took the time to read your phone you would know," You joked playfully but it didn't land, Chan sat up and grumbled at you that he'd been too busy working to even think about his phone.

"I was joking Channie...Come to bed, I can help you relax...Give you a massage?" He continued to sit there staring at the floor as if he hadn't heard a word you said,

"Chan?"

"For fuck sake! Why are you always going on! I've just walked through the door! Give me a chance!" You cringed at his yelling, the boys were all asleep and if he continued he would wake them all up.

"Chan the boys are sleeping," You hissed at him not fancying the boys coming out to find the two of you fighting with one another over seemingly nothing since you had no idea what was bothering Chan so much lately. It just seemed as though he never wanted to be around you and when he did it was as if you weren't there, he would spend the whole time ignoring you.

"I don't care! I'm sick of you always being around to check on me, you're always here, always breathing down the back of my neck. It's exhausting Y/n!" The boys had to have been awake by now but they weren't coming out of their rooms, you just stared at Chan waiting for him to finish his rant. You knew how stressful his life was and you always gave him space when he needed it, always forgiving him for yelling at you when things got bad but this was enough.

"I'm here to make sure my boyfriend doesn't overwork himself, to make sure he actually gets some sleep since he doesn't listen to his band members." You finally snapped, tears starting to gush out of your eyes as you told him how you were really feeling. You were angry at him for not taking care of himself and angry that he was taking his anger out on you and the boys who had told you about his outbursts with them all week.

"I gave you space when the boys said you were snapping at them, I figured tonight you would want some company." Chan looked at you as you spoke, his heart breaking into two pieces as he saw the tears rolling down your face. It was then that everything fell into place and he was the Chan you knew and loved. His arms wrapped around you without another word as he kissed the top of your head. Telling you how sorry he was over and over again until you accepted it and told him to go back to bed with you.

MINHO:

This fight had been going on far longer than you wanted it to, you didn't even want to be fighting with Minho because you knew he could stand his ground. Neither of you could remember what was going on in the fight, it had stared over something so small and petty that it no longer seemed important.

"Can't you see that I have a point?!" Minho yelled out as he turned around to look at you, your head was in your hands as you sat at the kitchen table. Shaking your head in answer to him,

"No, because I can't even remember what we're supposed to be fighting about." You mumbled, laying your head down against the wooden table wanting nothing more than for the fight to be over already.

"That's your problem! You always forget everything, every little thing! Because you just don't care." Your heart panged as you lifted up to stare back at your boyfriend with a blank stare wondering if he truly meant what he had just said to you,

"I don't care?" You couldn't believe what he was saying to you, your chest was starting to hurt as he said nothing to you until you shook your head, trying to urge him into saying something else.

"You don't, you don't care about anyone else but yourself." This only made your chest ache more as you stared at him, waiting for him to tell you that he was joking or that he wasn't being serious but it never came. He continued to stare back at you with a serious look on his face as if he believed it,

"That's it. Walk away like you do every time!" He yelled out as you began walking out of the kitchen but you scoffed at him, going into the living room and pulling out a box from your storage closet.

"If I don't care, what's all of this?" You dropped the box down onto the table and began pulling out all of the small items you'd kept over the years of being together with him. The ticket stub from your first date together, a photo of you both on your third date, and even a ramen packet from when you first cooked for him and the rest of the boys when you were first introduced to them.

"Don't you dare tell me I don't care about us!" You yelled out at him as you cried, you hadn't even noticed you'd been crying until you felt the tears rolling down your cheeks.

"Babe-"

"No. You look at me, and you tell me I don't care about our relationship when every day I'm doing everything I can to keep us going." Minho sighed as he pulled you into his chest, rubbing your lower back as you cried into his arms,

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said it, I was just angry at both of us...Fighting over something we can't remember." He whined as he brought you closer to him, sinking down onto the floor so that he could continue to hold you close to him as he apologised for what he had said.

CHANGBIN:

Changbin had been giving you the silent treatment all day and it was starting to bug you, you had done nothing wrong to warrant him not speaking to you.

"I thought you wanted to watch a movie tonight," You pouted at him as he walked into the shared apartment you had together and headed straight towards the bedroom instead of staying with you.

"Changbin!" You called out but he ignored you again and again, not even glancing over at you as he shut the bedroom door. You weren't going to stand for it, all day he'd been like this. Ever since you'd gotten to the dorms and the boys began talking with you, he'd began ignoring you.

"What's going on? I thought we were going to cuddle and watch a movie," You whined at him playfully,

"Why don't you ask Jisung to cuddle you!" He snapped out as he stared at you, his chest rising and falling quickly and you realised what his problem had been all day. Jisung had been a little clingy with you today but you put that down to him not seeing you for almost a month when you went home for a while.

"We're just friends," You sighed to Changbin, sitting down on the bed as you stared at him. This was the way it always was when it came to you hanging around with people, whenever Changbin saw them getting a little too friendly with you in a way he didn't like he would become this overly jealous boyfriend who had no need to be jealous.

"Tell him that, he didn't seem to think that when he had his arms draped around you the way he did...and you didn't exactly stop him Y/n," You rolled your eyes as you laid down on the bed not wanting to get into this fight with him, it was something that was overdone all of the time and something that didn't need to be spoken about. He knew that he was the only one you loved and it would always be that way,

"He's a friend,"

"He doesn't act like a friend! He acts like a lover." He continued to rant on about how Jisung shouldn't be able to wrap his arms around you like that, how it was Changbin's job and not Jisung's.

"Do you not trust me?" You finally questioned as you sat up, coming face to face with Changbin who was at the end of the bed staring back at you.

"Maybe I don't," You scoffed at the comment, saying nothing more as you got up from the bed and began to pack some of your clothes into a bag, not wanting to have the whole trust fight with him.

"Where are you going to go?" His voice was calmer now as he realised he'd upset you but you weren't going to speak to him, you were going to give him a taste of his own medicine by ignoring him the way he had ignored you all day.

"Y/n! You know I didn't mean it," He yelled out as he followed you down the stairs of your apartment and towards the front door, begging for you not to go but you were still walking out as he spoke to you.

"But you did, didn't you? You don't think you can trust me despite us being together for almost five years?" Tears were running down your face as you turned around to look at him, your eyes were bloodshot as you let the tears flow through your anger.

"I've been with you through everything, I've been there even when I was scared you would cheat on me but I stayed. I trusted you throughout every part of our relationship, all I'm asking for is the same trust!" You pleaded with him and he sighed, finally realising how much of an idiot he had been acting around you. He trusted you, of course, he did. He knew that he could trust you with his life if he needed to but he couldn't help but feel jealous when he saw someone else all over you.

"I do trust you...I just find it hard when he has his hands over you," You sighed at him and kissed his cheek, promising him that there was nothing that could come between you.

HYUNJIN:

It happened for the sixth time this week, Hyunjin ignored your texts and calls and you were starting to worry that something was wrong. You text Chan asked if Hyunjin was at the studios and if you could head over, Chan seemed relieved to hear from you and you headed over right away. Taking everybody some lunch since it was almost time for them to eat and you didn't know if they had something,

"I bought the food!" You called out as you walked into the dance studio to see Hyunjin, Jisung and Minho standing together all of them covered in sweat from the work out they had been doing. Hyunjin rolled his eyes as he saw you standing there but you thought you were seeing things and chose to ignore it,

"I left it with Chan and Changbin so you better run before they eat it all," You told the boys as Minho and Jisung scrambled towards the door, wanting to get something before the boys grabbed it all.

"You're not hungry?" You asked as you saw Hyunjin getting ready to dance again but he just nodded, ignoring you as he waited for you to leave the room but you weren't going to. You were going to get to the bottom of this silent treatment one way or another.

"What's going on? Are we okay?" You asked insecurely as you stared at him, waiting for some kind of explanation as to what his problem was lately.

"We're fine. I just need to practice. Can you leave?" He snapped angrily as he stared at the mirror, taking in a deep breath as he got ready but you just shook your head. Turning to leave when you stood your ground instead of walking away,

"No. Something is clearly going on. You're ignoring me, ignoring my texts and calls. All I want to do is spend some time with you." You whined but it wasn't met with an understanding Hyunjin as it normally was, he just started yelling at you.

"I don't have time to act like I'm happy to be around you! I don't have the energy to be around you right now!" You froze in place as you heard the words he was saying to you,

"You don't have to act to be around me! I thought you loved me, I thought you would be happy around me no matter what. I'm sorry I seem to bother you so much Hyunjin," You scoffed slamming the door as you stood your ground, wanting to know what else he thought of you now that he was spilling his guts.

"You know that's not what I meant. Fuck, you always take everything so literal." He groaned at you, running his hands through his hair as he stressed out,

"You just said you don't want to act happy around me, that you don't have the energy to be around me so how about I make things easier for you? I never come back? You'll never have to deal with me again." It wasn't until Hyunjin heard your voice crack that he knew you were crying, there were tears rolling down your face from how angry you felt about everything and he grabbed your hands.

"Y/n-"

"No, you clearly don't want to be in this relationship anymore. I'll do you the favour of ending things," You mumbled, snatching your hand away from him but he pulled you back into his chest. Staring down into your eyes as he nervously shook his head,

"I didn't mean it. I've been busy with dancing, writing and then we're getting told off by our manager for not being on time...I was just projecting my anger," He explained as he rubbed your lower back, kissing your forehead as he apologised over and over again for making you cry.

JISUNG:

Another date another night of Jisung sneaking out of the dorms to come and see you. He was panting heavily and sweating as he walked into your apartment staring at you with a giant smile on his face which faded quickly when he realised you weren't happy to see him standing there.

"You wouldn't have to sneak around like this if you just told the boys we were dating," You mumbled as you placed some popcorn into your mouth, staring at the TV screen as you watched the movie you'd put on.

"I can't tell the guys about us yet," Yet. That was what he always said whenever you brought up the topic of telling his friends about your relationship. He wasn't ready yet, it wasn't the right time yet, the boys didn't need to know yet. Every excuse he could give to you he would if it meant getting out of sharing you with the boys but it only made you grow anxious over time.

"Why? If you're that ashamed of us being together, why don't you just end things?" You snapped at him as he sat down next to you, you had enough of sneaking around. The point of your relationship was to be happy together and spending time together easily but his sneaking around and always being overly secretive with the boys lead to too much hassle.

"Ashamed? I'm not ashamed of you." He said calmly as he clearly didn't see that you were as angry about this as you were but you'd reached the breaking point. I t was getting exhausting having to pretend that you didn't know him whenever you would bump into one another in the JYP building.

"You act like it," You snapped harshly as you turned around to look at him, his eyes were wide and he put down the bowl of popcorn as he got up from the sofa.

"Is there something bothering you?" He questioned as he stared at you,

"Yes! I want you to tell the boys we're together. I'm sick of sneaking around and pretending I'm not in love with you whenever I see you at work," You thought it would be simple. The other boys were in relationships and they were happy for one another. What could possibly be the problem with Jisung telling them about you and him?

"But I'm not ready to tell them," He sighed as he felt as though he was going around in circles with you on the subject, he didn't see why you wanted to make it into a huge deal that the two of you were dating.

"You're not ready to tell them or you're not ready for people to know you're not on the market anymore," Your hand slapped over your mouth as you realised what you had said but it was no secret that Jisung flirted with everybody. You'd been working in the studios with Chan when you overheard Felix and Changbin talking about Jisung flirting with one of the stylists.

"What are you talking about?-"

"I hear about your stories, how you flirt with everyone at the studio, everyone tells me about it." You mumbled as you realised how crazy you sounded right now but you didn't care.

"Flirt with who? Why would I flirt with anybody?" You shook your head at him as you stared at him,

"It's the only thing that makes sense about not telling the guys or anybody else about us. You just do that so you have the freedom to flirt and be with whoever you want!" The way you suddenly raised your voice shocked Jisung, he'd never heard you yell at anybody before much less him.

"Babe-" He reached his hand out to you but you stepped away from him, begging him not to call you that right now.

"Please just go I've had enough of this, I've had enough of being your secret." You mumbled tiredly as you felt the tears begin to gush down your cheeks, getting so angry at the thought of him flirting or being with somebody else that you began crying but Jisung didn't move an inch until he took your hand in his. Walking towards the door of your apartment as he began dialling Chan's number into his phone, bringing it up to his ear as he shut and locked your apartment door.

"What's going on?" You questioned confused but he just told Chan he would be back soon and to have some food.

"I'm introducing you to the boys, I had no idea you felt this way." He looked at you nervously, reaching up to rub his thumb under your eyes to remove the tears.

"I don't want you to think I'm ashamed of you, or flirting with somebody else...I didn't tell the boys because I figured I could keep you to myself for a little while longer," He confessed as he leant forward to give you a small kiss on the lips. Smiling as you kissed him back,

"I'm sorry for-"

"Don't, I should be sorry for acting the way I did." He said as he cut you off, beginning to walk down the stairs of your apartment building.

FELIX:

As soon as you watched Felix hit the ground your whole body seemed to launch yourself at him, rushing to his side as you went to check that he was okay.

"Babe, you okay?" Your voice was strained as it came out panicked, checking over him as you run your hands over his elbow which he'd smashed onto the dance practice floor.

"I'm fine," He grumbled at you, snapping his arm away as he got up from the floor, moving away from you as he mumbled something about you being overprotective. You knew that you were protective of him but that was only because you didn't want anything dangerous to happen to him, Felix was the love of your life and seeing him hurt, hurt you.

"I was just watching out for you," You whispered, hurt that he seemed to be upset over something so seemingly insignificant.

"Well don't! You're constantly breathing down my neck and it's fucking annoying," You and Felix rarely fought and if you did it normally ended in you walking out, you hated confrontation and yelling but this time you weren't going to back down from it. You'd done nothing wrong to warrant being called annoying by Felix, all you did was try to make sure he was okay.

"You're overreacting, I just wanted to make sure you hadn't hurt yourself," You were calm with him, trying to make him see your reasoning but it only seemed to make him angrier, he grew red in the face as he turned to look at you.

"What are you? My parent?!" He cried out as he stared at you, clearly, it was something else that was bothering him and he was passing the blame onto you.

"I was making sure you didn't break a bone! The next time I'll just leave you to cry on the floor!" Felix was shocked at the sudden yelling coming from you, in all the years that you had been together he'd never once heard you yell at him or anybody else.

"You're constantly all over me! It's overbearing to have my partner constantly watching my every move!" He yelled out before he even processed what he was trying to say, he knew how sensitive you were to be called overbearing. Your ex had finished things between you because you were always checking in on them to make sure they were okay. Felix said nothing as he waited for you to say something but all you did was shake your head at him, tears rolling down your cheeks from the anger you were feeling. You had no idea how to process the feelings and they were coming out in form of tears instead.

"Babe-"

"No! You know what, if I'm that overbearing as a partner why don't you just leave me? Huh?" You snapped at him as you raised your eyebrows, having enough of this already,

"If I'm that bad to be with just end things! All I wanted to do was make sure you hadn't seriously injured yourself! I was trying to be a good partner but whatever, if you don't care and you want to get hurt-" You grabbed your bag from the floor and began storming out of the room,

"Then be my guest, but don't come crying to me when you hurt yourself and no one is around to help you." You tried to slam the door to make a dramatic exit but Felix grabbed the handle to stop you, bringing you into his arms as he pressed you against his chest. It was now that you realised he was also crying but not because he was angry but because he realised how much he'd upset you,

"I shouldn't have said what I said. I'm sorry," He whispered as he kissed the top of your head, kissing down to your lips.

"Let's go home. Have a shower and watch a movie." He whispered to you, holding onto you tightly so that you couldn't leave him,

"I'm just stressed with comebacks coming and the shows-" He was cut off when you leant up to kiss his lips softly,

"I'll stop being so over protective...I promise," You whispered to him as you kissed his cheek once again, tugging at his grasp so you could head home for the evening.

SEUNGMIN:

You and Seungmin had been living together for about six months and it had become an unspoken rule that you cleaned the home while he worked at the studios. It was just the way things worked since you were out of a job thanks to lockdown happening too suddenly, you enjoyed the cleaning and Seungmin enjoyed coming back to a clean home but this week was different. You'd been too sick with migraine to even think about moving out of bed and Seungmin had been so busy at the studios he'd barely noticed you not leaving your room. YOu were asleep when he got up for work and asleep when he came in late so he figured you were fine.

"Ugh! Fuck sake! Y/n!" You heard Suengmin scream as he entered the house, you groaned wrapping yourself in a blanket as you stood at the top of the stairs to see him. He'd walked through the door, tripping over the shoes that had been left on the floor instead of on the shoe rack,

"The house is a fucking pigsty!" He yelled out as he walked into the living room to see nothing had been done all week, the washing from Monday morning was still sitting on the floor in front of the machine and the dishes were beginning to take over the kitchen sides and table.

"I've been a little-"

"I'm so sick of coming home to a messy house!" You flinched at the way he yelled his voice but not because you were scared but because yelling only made your head feel worse.

"I've not been well, I was going to do it when I felt better," You mumbled, leaning your body against the wall to try and relax but it only seemed to make Seungmin angrier.

"You do nothing all week long! All I ask is that you make sure the house is tidy and I'm constantly coming home to a mess!" Seungmin continued to rant about how you didn't have a job and had nothing to do all day until you finally lost it. Snapping at him as you cried, tears rolling down your cheeks from the anger you were feeling towards him,

"I haven't been cleaning because I'm sick! If you were any kind of boyfriend you would have taken the chance to notice I've barely gotten out of bed in over a week because my head feels like it's being kicked in!" The sudden yell from you made Seungmin stumble back and take a real look at you for the first time that night, your hair was a mess, you looked like you hadn't slept right for days and you looked genuinely unwell and he filled with dread as he realised he hadn't even noticed until you said something.

"I've been so stressed about not having the house clean but I could barely get out of bed, Sungie." You whined as you collapsed onto the sofa in front of him not knowing what to say or do anymore, all you wanted to do was crawl into bed.

"Go, I'll clean up and I'll bring you something to eat. I'm not taking no for an answer," You didn't fight him back on it, you just lifted yourself up from the sofa and headed up to the bedroom.

An hour or two later the door to the bedroom opened and Seungmin appeared, carrying a tray with food and painkillers on.

"Lay back," He told you as he placed a damp-cold cloth on your head, making sure you were comfortable before he began getting the soup ready for you to eat,

"I'm sorry. I should have checked on you before now. I promise I'll start helping around the house too,"

JEONGIN:

The front door slammed against the wall as you walked into the apartment, laughter filled the air which only seemed to fuel your growing anger even more. Water was dripping onto the floor from your body as you kicked the door shut behind you, staring into the living room to see your boyfriend sitting there with all of his friends who had yet to notice you. Once Jeongin heard the door slam shut he turned around to see you standing there, you were drenched and kicking off your shoes as you held eye contact with him.

"Babe? You're all wet, and you're late home." He chuckled at something that Felix had said to him and you could feel yourself starting to lose your patience with him. Normally you were the kind and relaxed partner but tonight was too much even for you, you'd been stood up by your own boyfriend and now he was choosing to spend his evening gaming instead of with you.

"Do you have any idea what day it is?" The tone in our voice changed the read of the room as the game was shut off and the boys began to leave without a word to you or Jeongin who looked lost and confused. They could sense that there was a fight coming and none of them wanted to be in the way of the warpath when everything finally came out.

"Guys?!" They didn't answer Jeongin as the door shut and he was left staring at you, he was blushing a little as he tried to remember what day it was and what he could possibly be missing that would make you this angry at him.

"I was sitting inside for an hour and then I thought, maybe you just forgot and went to bed because you've had such a hard day," As you spoke to him you peeled off the wet jacket you were wearing and dropping it on the floor, ignoring the squelching sound it made as it hit the hardwood flooring.

"I figured you'd be in bed and I wouldn't be as mad at you for forgetting but what do I find when I walk into our house? My boyfriend, gaming instead of out with me on our two-year anniversary date," As soon as the words left your mouth Jeongin got up on his feet his eyes widening in fear, trying to walk over to you and apologise in any way that he could but you weren't going to stand for it. This time you'd had enough of his excuses of blaming things on being too tired, it wasn't an n excuse anymore when you'd given him reminders all week. Telling him how excited you were for your date on Friday, not to mention that it was the anniversary of the two of you first got together.

"I thought that was next week," He pleaded with you trying to get you to speak to him but you just walked up to the bathroom, not wanting to fight with him while you were dressed in wet clothes.

"Babe!" He called out but you shut and locked the door in his face, turning on the shower and radio so you wouldn't have to hear him yelling for you to open the door while you were showering.

When you emerged from the bathroom Jeongin was waiting for you on the edge of your bed, staring at you as he waited for you to speak first but you weren't going to. The silent treatment seemed like the best course of action so you kept your mouth shut, peeling back the covers and climbing inside and covering yourself up.

"That's it then? You're not even going to talk to me?" Jeongin snapped as he stared at you, turning the light on whenever you would turn it off.

"I'm tired." You lied as you laid there with your eyes shut, you weren't tired. Far from it. The thought of Jeongin not remembering your anniversary was bothering you more than it should have been meanwhile it didn't seem to bother him one bit.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean for it to happen. I thought that it was next week...You know I never would have stood you up-"

"But you would, this isn't the first time and it won't be the last so whatever," You rolled over on your side to face away from him but Jeongin wasn't going to let you get away with it,

"What do you mean it's not the first time?" You scoffed as if he didn't know.

"You ditch me all of the time to hang out with the boys. I'm used to it. I just thought tonight would be different." The room fell into an uncomfortable silence as Jeongin tried to remember the last time he cancelled on a date to hang out with the boys instead but he couldn't.

"I've never-" You sat up which cut him off, he could see the anger written across your face as you stared at him.

"The date we went on when you decided to meet my parents. I had to rearrange it seven times because the boys were doing something you just had to be included in." You stated as you angrily got out of the bed and placed your hands on your hips.

"I have friends Y/n! A life! I can't help it if things come up," Which was true but what bothered you more was that he had made plans with you first and then bailed on you.

"You can always rearrange with the guys, something like meeting my parents and our anniversaries are a one-time thing," You hoped that he was seeing where you were coming from with all of this but from the look on his face you could tell he hadn't gotten it. The angrier you got the more tears began to well up in your eyes but you didn't want to cry in front of him, he would think you were upset but you weren't. You were pissed off.

"Babe. I'm sorry, okay? I'll make it up to you." He soothed as he reached out to take your hand in his, dragging you onto the bed beside him as he wouldn't take no for an answer.

"I'll cancel my weekend plans, we'll spend the weekend together. Just the two of us," He promised as he kissed the top of your head over and over again.

Tagline: @taestannie @kneel-begyourpardon @minholuvs @sw33tnight @acciocriativity @that-anxious-bisexual

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marsbutterfly · 3 years ago

Note

Hi! I hope you're okay because I'm not, but nobody cares probably.

Hope you don't mind if I request you a Guardian Angel! Hanji x Female reader: reader's father is in heaven and he begs Hanji to go to visit his daughter because she's suffering for his death and wants someone to always be with her to love her as he loved her but now he can't because he passed away.

Unluckly it's a true story, if you'll write this I'll be so happy, but of course you don't have to do it if you don't want to.

Take care of yourself. Make sure you eat something and drink a lot of water <3

With You In This Life, And The Next

Summary: Grief is a strong, sometimes overwhelming emotion for people, mostly associated to the loss of a loved one.

Wattpad! | AO3! | Word Count: 4.1k | Warning: Parental Loss.

This is not the first time that you have cried yourself to sleep. In fact, this has become a recurrent thing since your father passed away. Not only that, but the visits from your guardian angel have become less frequent than they used to be and Hanji refuses to explain to you why this is happening.

So you just hold tightly onto your pillow in a desperate attempt to muffle your cries. Your whole body shakes from the violent sobs and you scream into the surface in your hands, a pained sound coming from a wounded soul.

Every morning when you wake up, you feel the physical result of your grief: eyes puffed up and tender to the touch, nose sore from the number of times you had to wipe away the running snot, knuckles finally relaxing after holding onto your pillow so tightly throughout the night.

It’s an effort to get out of bed, but you do so because you know that’s exactly what your father would have wanted. You drag your body to the side and push the covers towards the left, freeing yourself from its grip.

The cold wind coming from the air conditioner hits your exposed legs and you shiver. Though freezing, you still do not care enough to turn it off. You push down on the mattress, trying to find a good setting so you can prop your body up.

You lift your ass off of the bed for a few seconds before falling right back down, in that moment you realize that you simply can’t do it. Your vision becomes blurry and you begin to hyperventilate, trembling hands finding their way to your face as you curse yourself.

Finally finding your grounding, you stand up. Though unstable, your legs support the weight of your body as you take a few steps toward the bathroom. It takes every bit of effort out of you and, by the time you get to the other room, you are exhausted.

Using the back of your wrist, you wipe away the raw tears that roll down your cheeks like waterfalls, though the more you brush them away, the more will come out. You have never felt so hopeless in your entire life.

Though his death has affected you in every possible way, you still force yourself to go to class. Your grades have dropped significantly as you can’t seem to focus on something else for long enough before becoming a teary-eyed mess.

When you stand up, your body immediately collapses back onto the bed and your head hits the wall. It glides down gently until it reaches your pillow and you bring your knees close to your chest, deciding that you would skip the first class of the day.

You reach for the space on the other side of your bed and pick up a material that was once wrapped tightly onto a ball. You hold onto the shirt that belonged to your father tightly, squeezing out the last few specks of the scent of his skin that remain on the fabric.

“Why am I so useless?” You ask, hoping that your guardian angel would come through the window with some answers but, unbeknownst to you, they were busy dealing with another problem revolving around you.

“Please, I’m begging you.” He screams, his fist pounding at the door with all his might. The tears in his eyes threatened to fall and everyone walking past could see that the man was clearly in distress.

“Sir, I have told you time and time again,” The angel standing in front of the gate says, looking down at some sort of clipboard, “You are not allowed to go down to visit someone.”

“But this is my daughter,” Your father cries out loud, his banging on the door intensifies as the portal to Earth changes color. The security guard can see it in his eyes that he is going to make a run for it as soon as the area is cleared and they stand up, hoping to stop him.

But they don’t have time to do so. Instead, a hand finds its way to his shoulders and he looks behind him at the creature.

“Archangel Barachiel,” the guard says, bowing to the angel in front of them. Though intimidated by the size of the archangel’s wings, your father still finds the courage to continue to make eye contact with them, “What are you doing here?”

“You don’t have to call me that anymore,” they express, their voice is soothing and a calm radiating from them so intensely that it could put any human to sleep in a second, “my name is now Hanji. It’s easier for the person I am protecting to pronounce and remember.”

“Yes, of course,” the angel with the smaller wings agrees, “I was simply trying to explain to this man who has just arrived that it is impossible for him to go back to Earth and see someone unless they are a guardian angel.”

“How do I become a guardian angel?” He eagerly asks, a hint of hope in his voice as he realizes he might be able to go down to Earth and see his daughter once again. The guard shoots him a dirty look and takes a step to the right, now standing exactly in front of him so he won’t be able to sneak past the opening of the gate.

“You have to be an angel for at least a couple hundred years until you even qualify to apply,” they roll their eyes, crossing their arms in front of their chest. When Hanji glares at them with a disapproving look on their face, the guard uncrosses their arms and lets them fall to the side of their body, head hanging low in shame.

“Please, can you help me go see my daughter?” The man begs, clutching onto the angel’s dress for dear God. He pleads for help with such desperation that the former archangel can’t help but feel bad for the creature before them.

“I can’t promise you anything, but I am willing to try,” Hanji responds with a smile, their hands touching your father’s as they remove his grip from their dress. “What’s her name?”

“y/n l/n,” he responds and Hanji immediately stops in their tracks, a blush quickly begins to rise and take over their cheeks, their entire body becoming hot to the touch as they look at the other angel in the room, who avoided their gaze at all costs.

“Oh,” they responded. The man’s eyes were still glued to their face, expecting an answer, “I know her.” They turn to the security angel who denies the man passage, "I'll take care of it."

While guiding the man towards a secluded location, the angel reaches for their pocket, Hanji pulls out a bundle of golden keys, the color perfectly matching the entrance gates of heaven, down to the bright silver light that emanates from it.

“Each tile on the floor represents a moment of her life, every day that passes, every core memory she develops, a new tile is automatically added to the collection.”

“What do the different colors mean?” Your father asks, kneeling down to look at a blue-colored one.

“There are three primary colors: blue, yellow, and red. The blue ones represent days of her life when she was sad. As you can see on the one you are currently looking at, that’s the day you left Earth.” Hanji explains, pointing at the tile and your father feels his non-beating heartbreaking. “That was one of the hardest days of her life.”

“Why did I have to leave?” He asks, his fingers gently going through the glass as he attempts to caress your face, desperation growing in his chest as he fails.

“When humans fulfill their objective in life, their time expires,” Hanji’s voice is quiet and soothing, they reach for his head and stroke the area gently, something they have done to you a thousand times before and they know it produces a comforting sensation. The man can’t help but nuzzle against the touch. “I know she misses you but you left behind a strong woman, who can take care of herself and has the biggest heart in the world.”

“How do you know my daughter again?” He inquires, using his thumb to wipe away a tear that falls down his cheek, he clears his throat in an attempt to hide the blockage that forms in the back of his throat as he thinks about you.

“Oh…” They say, placing their hand behind their neck while rubbing the area, “I’m her guardian angel.”

He squints for a second, the blush on Hanji’s face giving it away that there was something more to it than simply being your “guardian angel,” though he ponders if he should ask about it or keep quiet. Part of him wanted to make sure his little girl was being taken care of and the other part of him didn’t want to imagine his precious daughter having a significant other.

Ultimately, he decides to go for it, “Just her guardian angel?”

Hanji can feel their cheeks burn in embarrassment, they avert your father’s gaze at all costs but the man won’t give up, he needs to know if, after years worth of heartaches, you have finally found somebody who will take care of you no matter what.

The angel doesn’t know how to respond, words dying in the back of their throat until they finally find the courage necessary, “Well, we never made it official but I’m her partner.”

“You should make it official,” Your father encourages them, though he immediately turns his head back down to look at you. Their finger touches the glass as he points down at someone else, “Because someone just asked to kiss her.”

Hanji chokes on their own spit for a few seconds, rushing from one side of the room to the other as they look down to Earth. The imagery before them was so terrifying that they had to sit down on a chair beside the glass to regain their composure. They clear their throat after a while, placing one hand in front of their mouth to make it more dramatic.

“She wouldn’t kiss him,” Hanji tries to rest assured but in the spirit of messing with them, the man looks down at the glass once more and gasps.

“She’s kissing him right now!” He exclaims and the wind from Hanji’s wings hits the poor man in the face, it’s so intense that he ends up stumbling backward and nearly falling on his ass. The angel’s grip on the glass is so intense and the imagery before them is exactly what they had hoped for: You, pushing the man who tried to kiss you away as you make your way back to your house.

In response to their desperate actions, your father can’t help but let out a burst of heartfelt laughter, the first one since he had passed away.

“Don’t joke about that,” Hanji growls softly, “you scared the shit out of me.”

“Oh! I didn’t know angels could swear,”

“I mean, technically they can’t but I used to be an archangel, so the rules don’t really apply to me,”

“Would you tell me more stories of your time as an archangel?” The man asks, sitting beside the imagery of your crying face on the pillow while he pats the spot reserved for the angel. Hanji narrows their eyes and a smile takes over their lips, they take the spot next to him.

They bend their legs, bringing their knees closer to their chest as they move their lips around, thinking of what would be a good story to tell. After a few seconds, their face lights up and your father could nearly tell that a lightbulb just went on in their brain.

Hanji begins telling him the story of the Holy War, the tale of how angels and demons fought for over three thousand years after an archangel fell in love with a human but no ordinary one, a human who was bound to become an angel upon their death.

Envious, the demon king decided that he was the one who would have the girl and she would marry his eldest son in the hopes of becoming his successor. Needless to say, the Supreme Deity was unhappy upon realizing the girl’s fate was now left to chance and thus the war began.

Hundreds of thousands of angels, demons, and humans were killed in the conflict and unfortunately, one of the many casualties was said girl, who stood before her lover as they suffered one final attack from a nightly creature.

Saddened and angered by the death of their lover, the archangel went on a rampage, killing nearly the entire battalion of demons that marched the Earth on their way to Heaven. Filled with grief, they had to be forcefully removed from the battlefield and that was finally then that the two rulers understood that there could not be a balance without either of them.

As a gift for being the leader of the army of angels, the Supreme Deity decided to provide the archangel with a gift, “Eternal life” for the one they loved: once they were reborn, the archangel would spot her no matter where she was and finally, they would be able to live together.

Though it wouldn’t last for long, for the Demon King became enraged when finding out about the destiny of the two lovers, “That angel killed more than half of my army,” he said and the ground trembled, the skies of purgatory becoming darker than ever.

So, he decided he would make them pay for what they had done by distorting the blessing of his enemy. He turned it into “Eternal Reincarnation,” where the angel’s lover would constantly die in front of them and immediately be reborn into another vessel in close proximity.

The archangel spent the next seven hundred and sixteen years trying to break the curse, doing everything in their power but, with each reincarnation, another painful death came following. The human girl would endure the most horrible of tortures each time and never remember why.

“That’s quite a story,” your father says, placing his hand on Hanji's shoulder and he finally notices the tears that pool in their eyes, “was the curse ever lifted?” The angel doesn’t say anything at first, instead they simply shake their head.

“Not yet, though the Supreme Deity was able to make the curse a little less traumatizing,” they say.

“Like in sleeping beauty?” He asks and Hanji nods, a smile on their face as they remember how much you used to love that movie when you were a child.

“The human girl is now able to live through an entire lifespan without burning alive or being crushed by rocks,” Hanji explained, “She will suffer a natural death from old age, though…”

“She still must die in front of you - I mean, the angel,” he offers them a comforting smile, “Is she aware of the curse?”

“No, she has no memory of past lives but I have been her guardian angel throughout all versions of her that have ever lived.”

“I have more questions, is that ok?” He asks and Hanji nods, taking a seat on the floor next to the tile he is currently examining. “Does that mean that she isn’t really my daughter?”

“No, not at all!” The words burst out of Hanji’s mouth, it is something they don’t even need to think about, “That is your little girl. Every version of her is different, different parents and lives, but this one, this one is your daughter, you raised and shaped her into the person that she is. And if I may, this is my favorite version of her so far.”

“Did I do a good job?” He inquires and Hanji offers him a comforting smile of their own.

“You did an amazing job. The bond the two of you share is something that will forever be yours and hers. She may be a magical being but that is very much your little girl and that’s what she will always be.”

“Will she remember me in her next life?” Your father asks, trembling hands touching your face that reflects on the glass.

“I will make sure that she never forgets you,” Hanji says, “After all, you are the only one so far who I have allowed to enter this room. That in itself already means how important you are in her life.”

“So does that mean I won’t see my daughter here until you find a way to lift the curse?” Your father asks.

“That, unfortunately, is correct,” Hanji responds, clearing their throat while using the back of their hand to wipe their running nose. They rest their face on their knees, gazing away into nothing but their mind filled with all the scenarios in which they had to see you go.

“Well, that’s a bummer,” the man says, his eyes glued to the image of you leaving class in a hurry, rushing away from the ugly man who asked to kiss you not too long ago, “I miss her so much.”

“I’ll make you a promise,” the words fall from Hanji’s lips without a single thought behind them, their only intention was to be able to bring your father some comfort, “until I find a way to break this curse, I’ll give you a key so you can always access this room.”

“Really?” He inquires, thrilled.

“Yes,” the angel responds, “and if you go into different areas of the room, you’ll be able to see the different versions of her that have ever lived.”

“Thank you,” the man says, throwing his arms around Hanji and they smile, noticing that the last time they have seen your father so happy was the day you were born. This is the family you were meant to be with from the very first time you were ever born.

You sit on the chair before your desk, flipping a mechanical pencil around as you try your hardest to focus on the math equation in front of you. Nearly everything you knew about the world felt wrong and to live a life without a father is only torture, the only light recently has been Hanji.

A sigh escapes your lips as you close the notebook, defeat taking over your body the moment you realize that there is no point in trying so hard for something so insignificant. So you stand up with the book in your hand, only to let it go a few seconds later when you can’t find the necessary will to put it back in your backpack.

You begin making your way towards the bed, feet dragging behind your body until you reach the mattress where you throw yourself before curling into a small ball. The world feels like it has been moving too fast and there is nothing you can do about it.

Tears begin to pool in your eyes and the feeling in your chest eventually becomes too overwhelming to contain, so you allow the water to fall down your face onto the pillow. You bring your hand over to your face and eventually cover your mouth, suppressing the loud sobs that escape your body.

The sound of wings flapping together fills the air but you can’t stop yourself, the need to cry it out is stronger than the desire to run into Hanji’s embrace and that only adds a little bit more to your suffering. You never want them to feel like they aren’t loved but, at this moment, all you need is to be alone.

You sit up on the bed, using one hand to push down on the mattress and prop your body up while the other goes through your nose, wiping away the snot. After all, you still want to look as pretty as you can for your guardian angel.

They sit on the window, the dress lifting gently over their tight as they cross their legs, wings hanging out. The pale moonlight contrasts with their skin and it casts a shadow over their face, it’s a beautiful sight really, one that you could never get enough of.

“I missed you,” Hanji says quietly, you can feel the weight on your shoulders being lifted as their eyes meet yours. You find the courage to stand up, taking a few uncertain steps towards them.

“Why haven’t you come to visit in so long?” You ask, the tears returning to your eyes as you choke on your own words.

“I was with your father,” they say and you could feel as if your heart stopped beating for a millisecond. You trip over your own feet and land against Hanji’s chest, you grab a hold of the cloth of their dress just right above where their heart would be.

“You were?” The words fight to come out, your voice breaks halfway through the question and you feel a wave of nausea washing over you. Fighting the urge to keep what little food you had for dinner in, you swallow harshly. “Is he able to come to visit?”

Their face drops and an expression of pity takes over their features, they don’t need to say anything else for you to realize the answer and allow a simple “oh” to escape your vocal cords.

“He is, however, watching over you right now,” They reassure you and it does fill you with a bit of happiness to know that he is safe and, though he can’t come to Earth and see you, he is still watching over you. A part of him will always live on as long as you are alive.

You look out the window at the night sky and one particularly bright star catches your eyes, it causes your heart to sink in your chest but you smile nevertheless, blowing a kiss at it as you realize that that was a signal sent by your father that he is, in fact, with you at all times.

Before you have time to thank them, a determined look has already taken over Hanji’s brown eyes and you can’t help but be confused as to why they are looking at you that way, it was something new, though not at all bad.

“Let’s make this - us official,” Hanji eagerly says, grabbing a hold of your hands, “I want you to be mine and nobody else’s.”

“You’re ridiculous,” You respond, the serious expression on your face dissolving into something far lighter, “I’m already yours.”

“What about the ugly ass man that asked to kiss you tonight?” they ask in search of reassurance, the need in their voice hints towards desperation and you bring your hand up to their face, fingers brushing against the soft skin of their cheeks.

“I turned him down,” you reassure Hanji, the distance between your two bodies disappearing with every second that passes, “I want no one else other than you.”

“So you’ll be my girlfriend?” They ask, the panic in their voice fading away and you eagerly nod.

“A thousand times yes,” you flash them a smile, something they haven’t seen on your face since your father passed away. If anyone understands how strong grief can be, that someone would be Hanji, who has watched you die so many times.

With their strong arms, Hanji lifts you off of the ground, one hand holding onto your back while the other rests underneath your knees. Their wings support the weight of both of your bodies as they bring their lips closer to yours, coordinating their movements to make sure they won’t accidentally drop you on the ground.

Lips ghosting above yours before you close the distance between them, the warmth sensation their tongue provides you with awakens the butterflies in your stomach as they begin to fly all over your body, causing tingles to erupt from within your veins.

Without breaking the kiss apart, Hanji gently places you on the bed. Your hand goes through their hair and it accidentally gets stuck on all the knots but, lucky for you, the kiss doesn’t escalate, it remains the same: a gentle reminder of your love for each other.

The angel hops onto your bed right next to you, finally separating your lips. Though you yearn for more, you decide that being next to Hanji is enough for tonight.

“Would you tell me some stories of your time as an archangel?” You ask, nuzzling yourself on their shoulder while feeling as their arm wraps tightly around your waist, pulling you as close to their body as they possibly can. The soft sensation of their wings above you serves as a blanket while Hanji uses their feathers to go up and down on your hip, caressing the skin.

They smile, closing their eyes.

“Of course, baby.” “I will tell you as many stories as you would like.”

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honey-milk-depresso · 3 years ago

Note

please

this with malleus, azul, rook, and deuce

i’m begging you

Lmao sure- Sorry for the really late reply ;-;

TWST T-pose in front of them (2)

Malleus Draconia

You wanted to do it to see his reaction.

So..

you did.

Malleus was quietly looking out of Diasomnia's dorm window,

just minding his own business,

wondering what his precious s/o is doing

and then-

"Malleus."

Malleus turned around to see his s/o standing there...

doing-

a weird pose..?

"S/o?"

"I am t-posing to assert my dominance. And because I am the more dominant of us in this relationship we have created, I demand to have cuddles with you."

Malleus blinked in surprises,

before he chuckled softly,

rising from his chair and bringing you into his embrace,

gently stroking your hair.

He gazed at you.

"My little beastie, you surely are strange. It's quite endearing sometimes."

He rested a hand on your shoulder, guiding you to his room.

"Well then, shall we go to a more private area to cuddle, my dominant little beast?"

Azul Ashengrotto

Being Octavinelle's dorm leader ain't easy.

Especially while running Monstro Lounge and tackling with school.

You swear he's never got out of his seat until MIDNIGHT

M I D N I G H T

EXCUSE ME SIR-

I SLEEP AT UNGODLY HOURS BUT BECAUSE I’M DOING UNPRODUCTIVE, NONSENSICAL AND FUN SHIT

YOU’RE DOING PRODUCTIVE, TIME CONSUMING SHIT

YOU NEED A BREAK-

with the knowledge you have possessed in your world,

you know,

this is the right time to unleash it.

Walking up to Azul in his office who was still drowning himself with work on his desk.

You unleashed the beast.

“S/o, what are you doing?”

“Azul. I am T-posing to assert my dominance. And as the dominant one in this relationship, I demand you drop your work and sleep.”

Azul was slightly caught off guard,

but he ended up sighing, before he chuckled.

He stood up to ruffle your hair,

before placing a gentle kiss on your forehead.

“Alright, alright. I’ll sleep.”

Honestly, Azul,

you were the sub to begin with

JK JK BUT WE LOVE YOU-

Deuce Spade

During the Star Sending Event

Deuce put in a lot of hard work to make sure he’s got it.

He didn’t want to mess up,

and he wanted it to be perfect.

He’s the one in charge of sending the wishes after all!

Except with Trey, Idia and Ortho...but that’s not the point!!

He’s been putting his very best in this!

And he’s still not sleeping!

B R U H

BABY SLEEP-

So,

unleashing the knowledge

you have acquired from your world,

you went up to Deuce

and strut your very best T-pose..

“Um- S-s/o?? W-what are you doing??”

You cornered him to a wall, T-posing in front of him.

To be honest, you were already the dominant one in this relationship.

Comforting him and reassuring him he’s a changed man.

“I am T-posing to assert my dominance. And as the dominant one in this relationship, I demand you take off that outfit of yours and go to bed to cuddle with me.”

Deuce was so embarrassed-

his face was redder than Riddle’s hair-

SO FCKING CUTE-

I WANT-

I COULD EAT HIM-

Jk jk-

Unless 0-0

He hesitantly agreed,

you took him by the hand, and lead him to his dorm.

Honestly, I can’t tell who’s cuter in your relationship-

you or him? I don’t know~ <3

Rook Hunt

Hahaha

Being Vil’s henchman vice dorm leader of Pomefiore ain’t easy-

Honestly-

In general,

being Vice dorm leader isn’t an easy task.

Rook’s still smiling throughout the day.

But you can tell he’s getting kind of exhausted.

All the vice dorm work thrown at him, schoolwork, SO MUCH-

It’s quite fascinating and admirable that he’s still keeping a smile on his face.

No matter how tired he is.

But you are his s/o,

you ain’t letting YOUR MAN fake he’s not tired-

you WILL get him to

R E L A X

AND TAKE A BREATH

So-

It is time-

“Hm? Mon Cheri? What are you doing??”

“Rook, I am asserting my dominance. And as the dominant one in this relationship, I demand you take a break and stop faking you aren’t tired. You must relax with me, and ‘no’ is not an answer.”

Rook was slightly taken aback.

Looks like his s/o is very observant.

He knows you aren’t gullible,

but he didn’t expect you to notice detail.

He smiled, dramatically posing as he scooped you in his arms.

“Mon cheri! I’m so moved! Of course I will!”

You’re just so adorable!

#twst #twisted wonderland #rook hunt x reader #deuce spade x reader #azul ashengrotto x reader #malleus draconia x reader #malleus draconia #azul ashengrotto #rook hunt #deuce spade #twst headcanon #twisted wonderland headcanon #twisted wonderland x reader headcanon #twst x reader headcanon #twst x reader #twisted wonderland x reader

438 notes · View notes

dysfunctionalcrab · 4 years ago

Text

babysitter

pairing: georgenotfound x reader

pronouns: gender neutral

description: george is left to babysit your niece

warnings: mentions of a future family? just in case that makes you uncomfortable.

[y/n/n] - your nieces name

[y/s/n] - your siblings name (gender neutral too)

note: i’m not too sure about this imagine, please a like or reply if you actually enjoyed! - niss

you woke up to the sound of your alarm blasting your ear off, if you hadn’t turned it off right there you probably would have gone deaf.

george was sleeping like a baby beside you, you could hear his quiet snores. you were surprised he didn’t wake up to the sound of your ear-piercing alarm.

turning on your phone, you glanced at the time that read 12:30. you sighed in annoyance as you registered that you only had half an hour before you had to be on your way to university. so you got up and began your normal morning routine, brush your teeth, shower, have breakfast and finally get dressed. however, as you were packing your bag, almost ready to go, you received a notification from your [sibling]

[y/s/n]: we’re 5 minutes away!!!

[y/s/n]: thank you so much for agreeing to do this :)

fuck.

it completely slipped your mind. you had promised to take care of [y/n/n] for today, your 7 year old niece, while your [sibling] was at their job interview. regardless, you texted them a quick ‘no problem’ before rushing upstairs to wake up george.

he was still sleeping, but now he was completely hiding under the covers with one arm sticking out. you hated to interrupt his beauty sleep but this was more important. you began to shake him awake.

“babe,” you shook him

“wake up,”

“george,” you removed the covers off his face

“wake the fuck up!” you started poking his sides. usually, you would be a little less... harsh, but you were panicking.

finally the boy rose from his slumber, groaning and stretching all his limbs. he blinked a couple times before meeting your eyes

“good morning,” he said softly, as if he completely just disregarded your tone of desperation and worry.

you pulled him by his arm and he sat upright,

“you need to get up right now,” you told him

“what’s going on?” he questioned, clearly confused as you weren’t giving him any context

“you need to take care of [y/n/n] for today, i have classes today, and i need to leave in 5 minutes and [y/s/n] has a job interview and there’s nobody else to take care of her,” you rushed out all in once sentence.

“are you serious?” he narrowed his eyes at you. “you know how bad i am with kids, especially [y/n/n] , she hates me,”

that was partly true. unfortunately, your niece wasn’t exactly fond of george. ever since you even started dating,m, [y/n/n] acted cold towards your boyfriend, it only got worse when you moved in with him. she always refused to play a game if george was going to participate, or never accepted any high fives or hellos from him. you felt sympathy for george. this child despised him and now you were asking him to look after her.

“please, i’m begging you,” you looked at him with pleading eyes. his eyes softened up after recognising the urgency of the situation.

“fine,” he agreed. you sighed out of satisfaction that you didn’t have to stress out [y/s/n] over finding a new baby sitter.

“thank you so much,” you pressed a small kiss to his lips appreciatively.

right at that moment, you two heard the doorbell ring. you urged george to get ready as fast as he could while you went down stairs and greeted your [sibling] and your niece.

“auntie/uncle [y/n]!” [y/n/n] yelled as you opened the door, immediately rushing into your arms. she looked a lot taller than the last time you saw her

“how’s my favourite girl?” you picked her up and swung her, before placing a little kiss on her head

you gave your [sibling] a quick hug. they handed you a bag full of toys, teddies and colouring pens, along with a spare set of clothing just in case [y/n/n] got a little messy throughout the day. and some quick reminders about her favourite foods or how to get her stop crying. you’d looked after her before, so all of it was pretty familiar to you

“again, thank you so, so much, you have no idea how much you’re helping me.” they told you. your [sibling] gave [y/n/n] a kiss on the cheek and told her to be a ‘good and kind little girl’ before finally exiting the household.

george, at last, made his way down. wearing a decent pair of jeans and a hoodie, giving an awkward wave to [y/n/n]

you checked the time and knew you had to get going. you had to explain to her that uncle george was going to be the one looking after her today. and after one whole tantrum, you managed to convince her to be a good girl by promising to give her a big reward afterward.

finally, you kissed [y/n/n] and george a goodbye , then shut the front door behind you.

george and [y/n/n] stood opposite each other. there was an uncomfortable silence in the air. george felt so...he didn’t even know. what do you say to a child who hates you? [y/n/n] tightly clutched her bag of toys.

“so, [y/n/n],” george cleared his throat, he bent down to her level. “i hear you like toy story?”

[y/n/n] pouted “i don’t like you” she said, and stomped away.

george sighed. this was going to be a long day.

and it was.

it started off with [y/n/n] innocently using her colouring pens and drawing random things, you know, as children do. but when she ran out of paper, she made her way to your office, where all your uni work was. she grabbed the closest piece of paper that was sitting on your desk, deciding it was going to be the next canvas for her art. this paper just happened to be a very important assignment.

when george caught her in the act, he had to physically tear her away from your office, in defiance of all her kicking and screaming.

then, when george accidently left the door to your shared bedroom open. [y/n/n] waddled in without him noticing, she started playing with all of his devices. his computer, his microphone, and somehow she got a hold of his headphones, and took out the battery. george didn’t realise until he noticed the cover missing. he tried to ask her nicely where she threw the battery. but she insisted that she wasn’t going to give it back unless he stopped being ‘mean’

when lunch time rolled around, george put a pizza in the oven, he remembered clearly that [y/n/n] loved pizza, specifically pepperoni. nothing could go wrong here.

but when he called her to the kitchen so she could receive her lunch. she just stared blankly at the pizza, and then at him. she crossed her arms

“[y/n] usually makes a smiley face with the pepperoni”

george just felt all his will to live just disappear

coloured pens and toys were spread out all across the living room floor, [y/n/n] was sitting in front of the tv, george put on one of her favourite shows which thankfully distracted her for a bit, allowing him to relax. he pulled out his phone and texted you

to [y/n] <3 : help me please

to [y/n] <3: i cant take this anymore, i’m literally dying rn

to [y/n] <3: come home quick

he exhaled heavily, throwing his phone to the side. he was so exhausted.

[y/n/n] was roleplaying with her toys, making them move around and doing squeaky little voices. george smiled at the innocence

“purple bear doesn’t play with us anymore. princess giraffe, mr. george took her away from us,” she spoke in a high pitched voice

george’s ears perked up. how funny that she had a teddy named ‘mr. george’. curiously, he watched the little girl.

“koala george, is a meanie, he stole purple bear and now they don’t want to hang out with us!”

it didn’t take a genius to find out what [y/n/n] was displaying through her role playing teddies.

that was why she didn’t like george. before they got together, [y/n] mentioned they almost spent every weekend with [y/n/n], playing with her and having fun with her.

she felt abandoned by [y/n] and felt as if george had taken them away from her .

george felt at fault as he noticed the girls eyes started to water.

“does purple bear love us any more?” she continued to play.

george decided it was enough and he switched off the television. he joined [y/n/n] on the floor and grabbed the teddy that was supposedly ‘koala george’

“[y/n/n]” he spoke softly. the little girl looked up at him expectantly. he held up the teddy.

“is this supposed to be me?” he questioned her.

“that’s a koala bear,” she answered

“no-, [y/n/n],” he said. he thought about how to ask her, and just chose it was best to be flat out with the child,”

“did i steal auntie/uncle [y/n] away from you?”

the question took her by surprise. she gazed at him with big wide eyes. she thought about her answer and grabbed the purple bear, which was supposed to be you.

“they don’t play with me as much anymore, they’re always with you, because of you, they don’t love me anymore,” she pulled a face, it wasn’t angry, it wasn’t annoyed.

it was a genuinely sad face.

george was sure he physically felt a pang of guilt in his stomach. he never even comprehended the fact that a child could feel so rejected.

“listen... [y/n/n],” he said gently. he thought about his words. comforting someone wasn’t exactly his strongest point, particularly not a child who detested him “[y/n] will never stop loving you, okay? they love you very much, and i’m sorry you feel like i stole them ”

[y/n/n] continued to listen.

“but don’t forget that [y/n] has so much love to go around! look, they love you, and they love me, they love grandma and grandpa too! they will always love one another even if they can’t see each other often,”

[y/n/n] stayed silent. she fiddled with the purple teddy, folding its ears and patting its head. she loved that bear. it was actually gifted to her by you, when she was first born. she brought it to her chest and hugged it. george tried a different approach.

“listen, how about- this weekend, we can all go to the park together, and have a picnic. you, me, [y/n], and your parents too,”

she continued to just stay silent. george didn’t know what to expect, she was unpredictable, was she going to throw another hissy fit? or start to cry? he wasn’t sure

“can we also get ice cream?” she asked

george smiled and felt himself relax. thank god. “all the ice cream you want,” he told her

[y/n/n] stood up and giggled. like her whole entire mood did a whole fucking 180. “okay! let’s go play dress up now!”

———

7:45 pm. you finally arrived home. you were tired out of your mind. [y/s/n]’s interview was delayed by two hours and was currently half way back home, meaning you had enough time to spend with [y/n/n]

you unlocked the door, expecting to see a giant tsunami of toys and colouring pencils and pens, but what you saw was the most heart warming thing ever.

george was sleeping on the couch, his head resting on the armrest. he had a couple pink bows in his hair, his lips were painted a hot pink, he was wearing a couple sparky bracelets and a purple floral necklace.

in his lap, [y/n/n] rested her head, she was wearing a fairy costume with matching pink bows and sparkly bracelets.

you quickly snapped a photo of this wholesome moment. because, who wouldn’t? you spent a few minutes just watching the two sleep, they were probably just as tired as you.

moments like these made you really appreciate the people you had in your life. the people you love so dearly much.

you didn’t want to disrupt the ambience but you felt it was better for your [sibling] to collect your niece when she wasn’t covered in glitter and an overload of pink accessories.

you quietly woke george up,

“baby, wake up.” you shook him awake, gently. in a very different way than you did this morning. he opened his eyes. and immediately smiled upon seeing your face. you ran your thumb across his cheek

“it looks like you two had a lot of fun,” you teased.

he quietly chuckled. “she’s okay,” he told you. looking down at the little girl sleeping in his lap.

you slowly and carefully picked her up, removing any accessories you thought may seem uncomfortable to sleep in. she was a heavy sleeper.

you carried her upstairs, tucking her into you and george’s bed and placing a kiss upon her forehead. you turned back to george and rushed in for a bear hug

“thank you so much for doing that,” you said. “i love you so much, i know it probably wasn’t easy, she can be quite the handful,”

george chuckled. “handful is an understatement,”

“you’d better be willing to dress up like that with our own kids one day.” you stated, hugging him tighter.

his face broke out into a small smile, having thought of an image of you two playing with you future kids. he kissed top of your head and then your nose

“maybe one day”

———

masterlist

#georgenotfound imagines #georgenotfound x reader #georgenotfound #mcyt x reader #mcyt #georgenotfound imagine #mcyt imagines

570 notes · View notes

j-j-ehlby-writes · 3 years ago

Text

Almost (c.e.)

Pairing: Chris Evans x reader

Word Count: ~5.9k

Summary: You and Chris were set up on a blind date by your mutual friends. Sparks flew, but you never heard from him again. Two years later, you come face-to-face with him once more for their friends wedding.

Warnings: Some angst, swearing, not much else

A/N: This is a mixture of the movie “Life as We Know It” (mmm Daddy Josh Duhamel 🤤), a dating experience I had, and one scene from One Tree Hill. Enjoy.

My Masterlist

Two years ago…

My heart is pounding all the way to my ears. My hands are shaking under the table. My knee bounces uncontrollably as I wait.

I knew this was a bad idea. Why did I let her convince me to do this?

“You haven’t had a boyfriend for as long as I’ve known you.” My best friend so pointedly mentioned when we were out to lunch last week.

“What’s wrong with that?” I counter.

“I’ve known you for three and a half years.” She deadpans. Even without looking at her, I know she has her eyebrow raised at me and her lips are pursed.

“Your point?” I know she thinks my serious lack of companionship these past few years is wearing on me, but it’s been quite the opposite. Not being attached is freeing. I can do what I want when I want; I don’t have anyone to answer to. If I want to sleep until 3 on a Saturday, I’m going to do it. If I don’t want to socialize with anyone, I won’t. If I want to take a spontaneous road trip, I’m going to do it. My life is my own and that’s how I like it.

“I want my best friend to have someone to experience life with.”

My shoulders dropped, sighing in defeat. There was no way I was getting out of this conversation.

“I want you to be as happy as I am.” I see the love in her eyes as her mind goes to her boyfriend and their new relationship. They’ve only been together for a few months, but I know that this is it for her. She’s a smitten kitten and he is equally as infatuated with her. They’re sickeningly cute. “Which is why I think you need to meet one of his friends-”

“Lemme stop you right there,” I interrupt her, “I hate blind dates.”

“You’ve never been on one.”

“And there’s a reason for that.” She rolled her eyes at me. “They’re cliché, they’re awkward for both parties, and they never amount to anything, thus being a total waste of time.”

She sighed, “Ever the skeptic.”

“And don’t you forget it.”

“Regardless,” she continues, “I think you’ll really like this guy. He’s already expressed interest in you.”

Like that makes everything better. “Great so now I have to live up to his impossible expectations of me when I know absolutely nothing about him.” As if the idea of a blind date wasn’t bad enough, now it’s only a semi-blind date. There’s no doubt in my mind that she has hyped me up impossibly high, that’s what a best friend is for. However, when your confidence level is next to none and already skeptical of the pending meeting, there’s no way he’ll like who I am in reality.

“I can tell you anything you want to know about him.” She is bargaining with me. She really wants me to meet this guy. She wouldn’t be trying this hard if she didn’t believe we would hit it off.

“Well is he nice?” This was the only real question I had. If he isn’t kind then there’s really no future.

“Incredibly!” She continues to tell me of the many things he has done for a charity he started a few years ago and slowly but surely she was starting to convince me. If he was that generous then he has to have a good heart and therefore is a good man.

How bad could it be?

I check my phone, glancing at the time. Great, he’s late. That can’t be a good start.

Numerous reasons why popped into my head.

Reason one: he saw me and bolted.

Reason two: he got into an accident on the way here and he could be in the hospital.

Reason three: he changed his mind and decided to stand me up.

More and more played through my head as I sipped my drink.

By the time I was on my second drink, I was convinced he wasn’t showing up. I knew this was a ridiculous idea. I knew I shouldn’t have done this. I never should have listened to her.

I chugged the rest of my drink followed by some water before standing up to leave some cash. I was slightly humiliated for actually thinking this would be any different than all of my expectations.

My shoulder rammed into another as I turned to leave.

“Oh my, God, I’m so sorry!” A hand steadied me, gently grabbing the shoulder he ran into. “Are you okay?”

“My already small ego is a little bruised, but I think I’ll live.” I looked up to meet my assaulter’s eyes and immediately I froze.

Holy shit, it’s Chris Evans.

His piercing blue eyes were staring right at me, his concern was directed towards me. In all of his charming, ray of sunshine, bearded glory, he was here.

“I’m so sorry that I’m late. Traffic was insane over the bridge. I would have called but I don’t have your number.” He half-smirked but not in a cocky way. I’d seen him do it in interviews before. He could have come up with a lame excuse, but somehow I knew he was telling the truth.

“No, it’s okay. I understand completely.”

He sighed in relief, his gorgeous and perfect smile taking over his features. He looked down at the table and it disappeared. “Were you leaving?”

“Uh,” I stammered, “I was because I thought I was being stood up.”

“I feel awful. Please let me make it up to you. Let’s sit down, have a nice dinner, and get to know each other.”

I hesitate, now even more nervous than I was before.

As if sensing my hesitation, he decided to sweeten the pot a bit to persuade me, “We can even get dessert.”

I chuckle at his attempt. That’ll do it though. I sit back down with him following suit, finally starting our date.

We talked about everything. Anything and everything. No topic was off limits. Hours went by but it felt like minutes. We didn’t even know how long we’d been there until our waiter came to tell us that the restaurant was closed. We left and walked around the city until the night sky was giving way to the morning. He accompanied me back to my car, gave me the best hug I’ve ever received and a kiss on the cheek, promising we’ll get together again soon, and opening and closing my car door for me. I drove away with the biggest smile on my face and literal butterflies in my stomach. That was the best date I’d ever been on.

When I made it back to my apartment with the early morning rays peeking through my shades, I had a text message waiting for me from him. Just a simple good night, he had had an amazing time, and he couldn’t wait to see me again.

I fell asleep, hopeful. Hopeful that I would see him again, that this could maybe go somewhere. I don’t want to get ahead of myself, but it was hard not to. I hadn’t felt this way in an exceptionally long time. I haven’t been on this good of a date in equally as long. I can’t wait to see him again…

Present day...

I finally pull into the parking lot after an hour stuck in traffic. My 12-hour day at work today has taken a lot out of me. I’m exhausted, mentally and physically. Thankfully though, my 2-week-long vacation starts tomorrow. After that, I have fourteen days of no working, no getting up at the ass crack of dawn to be able to drive in miserable traffic, no dealing with difficult or boring co-workers. Just fourteen days of rest and relaxation, after the wedding of course.

My best friend and her fiancé are getting married on Saturday. I’ve watched them go through all of their highs and lows throughout the last few years and when he came to me telling me he planned on proposing, I couldn’t have been happier for them. He even asked me to secretly photograph the moment for her. She was more than surprised about everything.

Now their wedding is here and everyone couldn’t be more excited to celebrate them.

Tomorrow is their rehearsal dinner. The wedding party and their plus ones are all invited.

I walk into my apartment, immediately relieving myself from the confines of my shoes. A heavenly scent registers to me and I’m carried all the way to the kitchen. I see my sexy boyfriend standing at the stove with his back towards me.

“Hey babe,” he calls without turning around.

I hum, happily making my way towards him. I wrap my arms around his waist, placing a kiss on his back. “What is that unbelievable smell?”

He chuckles, vibrating through his chest. “Your favorite, of course.”

I hum again, “You spoil me, baby.”

He chuckles again, turning in my arms. His handsome face finally came into view. His gorgeous brown eyes look into mine as I get lost in his. For the past year, I’ve been the happiest I’ve been in a while. Since the day I met him, it was like everything fell into place. He’s sweet, ambitious, funny, kindhearted, passionate, and just overall the best man I had ever met. He makes me so happy…

Oh who am I kidding? He’s perfect. He is everything I ever wanted. If I made a list of all of the qualities I wanted in a husband, he would check off every single box.

But the feelings I have had for him over the last year are nothing compared to what I had in one night for him. I find myself wishing his eyes were bright blue instead of dark brown. I wish his arms were around me instead of the ones around me right now. The butterflies from that night have stayed dormant ever since.

I don’t know what happened after that night. I honestly thought we had a good time that night. Conversations flowed seamlessly. We made each other laugh so hard we had tears running down our faces. The physical connection was there- at first he had his arm around my shoulders as we walked around town, but as time went on he slowly moved lower around my waist, eventually intertwining our hands together until we arrived back at our cars. He even said that he wanted to see me again.

But I never heard from him again after that one text message. No call, no text, not even a message from my friend’s boyfriend. Nothing. I was disappointed beyond belief. I didn’t think he was that guy: the type to ditch someone without any explanation or goodbye. I thought I understood him to be a gentleman. Everything I had read about him pointed to him being one of the purest humans in the world. This was the opposite of all of that.

From that day on, I’ve loathed him. He gave me the perfect evening and then cut me off cold turkey from anything further. I have a three strike rule. His first: he was late. His second: he tricked me into liking him. His third: he lied to me. Three strikes and he’s out.

I have tried not to look back since. It’s not without its difficulties though since he’s literally everywhere. On magazine covers, in commercials, movie trailers, streaming services- he’s there. Why did he have to be such a successful actor? If he weren’t, it would make for forgetting him that much easier.

No closure. No answers. Nothing.

The rehearsal dinner went smoothly the next night which hopefully was foreshadowing for the big day itself.

A majority of us were standing around about to start when the doors loudly being opened drew everyone’s attention away from our milling about. A man stood in the middle of the doorway then strode in like he owned the place. The closer he got, the more the details of his face came into focus.

No. Freaking. Way.

I look toward my best friend. She looked like she wasn’t shocked he was late, but she knew he was coming. I creep up behind her and clear my throat. Instantly she cringed.

“Did you forget to tell me something?” I whisper to her.

She sends me an apologetic smile, “Well, I actually put off telling you ‘cause I didn’t know how you would react and then I meant to tell you last night but with the whole ‘I’m getting married in two days’ buzz took over and now the rehearsal is here-”

“Just please tell me I’m not walking in with him.” I beg.

She chuckles nervously before she escaped to go greet him with her fiancé.

I turn to her sister who is also one of my closest friends. “Did you know he was going to be a groomsman?”

The guilt written in her face tells me everything I need to know. “She made me promise not to tell you.”

I groan, “The loyalty level around here is staggeringly low.”

I head over to where my boyfriend is standing and take comfort in his arms before I have to deal with the man who broke my heart.

“Are you okay?” He asks a little confused by my actions.

I nod, “Just tired from last night.” He chuckles at the mention of the night before, squeezing me into his chest.

“Alright everyone! Time to get started.” The wedding coordinator beckons us all to the back entrance of the barn standing next to our corresponding wedding party member. I stand right in front of the Maid of Honor and Best Man. I kept my eyes forward focusing on anything but the guy who took his place next to me.

“It’s good to see you,” He murmurs to me over the instructions of the coordinator.

I scoff and roll my eyes. He has the nerve to say that to me after two years of silence. I imagined a million times what it would be like to see him again. I’d imagined a lot of screaming with possible hitting. Or I thought about the ever-effective, old fashioned silent treatment. He doesn’t deserve to know that our one night out together effected me so much and I’ve carried a rather large torch for him ever since. At the very moment, it will be the latter, but there’s no telling what tonight and tomorrow will bring.

“Now ladies, rest- don’t grab- your hand near the crook of his arm. Men, keep your arm at that angle with an open hand resting on your stomach- no fist. And don’t forget to smile- this is a happy day!” As quickly as he showed up, the coordinator was on to the bride and her father before either of us could register he was there.

I begrudgingly did as I was instructed, “resting” my hand on his bare forearm, holding a stand-in bouquet for the occasion in my other hand.

“Are you not going to talk to me?” He speaks again but I ignore him once more.

Thankfully that was when it was our turn to walk down the aisle. For the rest of the rehearsal, he didn’t get a chance to say anything else. As soon as we were done, I go straight for my boyfriend. I figured there’s no way he would approach me if I were with another man.

We all head to the restaurant afterwards to celebrate the last night before our friends begin their lives together as husband and wife. I keep my distance from Chris, always sticking close with my boyfriend.

The one moment I was alone was when I went to the bathroom. I thought for the few minutes I wouldn’t be in danger.

However I was wrong.

As soon as I step out an arm shot out in front of me. A very pale muscular arm.

“Are you seriously going to ignore me for the next two days?”

I duck under his arm fully planning on continuing what I set out to do.

“Y/N,” he grabs my arm, “will you please talk to me? What did I do to make you so mad at me?”

I whip around hopefully sending daggers his way. “Are you serious right now?”

“She finally speaks!” He exclaims.

“Because I cannot believe what I’m hearing. Like, I don’t think I heard you right.” All of the feelings I’ve been burying for two years were making their way up to the surface and I don’t think I can stop them. “We had a fantastic night. It was literally the best night of my life, it was the most comfortable with a guy that I had ever been. You made me laugh, you gave me butterflies, you helped me feel for the first time in years.” I try to swallow down the lump that was forming in my throat. “You told me you wanted to see me again. You made me excited for the future for once in my life… and then you took it away.”

With every second that passed, his expression got closer and closer to utter defeat: his shoulders slumped, his grip on my arm loosened, his jaw slowly unclenched, his eyebrows furrowed.

“You were late,” I hold up one finger, “You tricked me,” two fingers,” “You lied to me.” Three fingers were up and in front of his face for emphasis. “Three strikes and you’re out.”

I back away from him, having nothing more I wanted to say. As soon as I turned the corner, I felt liberated… for about five seconds. When that passed, devastation hit. For the last two years, I’ve held out hope- I tried not to- but I did, that maybe someday something could happen between us. That maybe, just maybe, we could pick up where we left off that night.

Now that the moment of confrontation has come and gone, I feel all the hope fade away. All of those possibilities I pictured have left the building. Being with him is no longer an option. I have my boyfriend who makes me happy, who gives me everything I could possibly want.

The rest of the night went on without another incident. Chris kept his distance. However, I could feel his eyes on me for every second that passed as we sat at the table. It was a relief when we finally left and could retreat back to our hotel rooms for the night. The bride and I got to stay in a suite that we’ll all be getting ready in in the morning. They wanted to uphold the “not seeing each other the night before the wedding,” even though they’ve lived with each other for a year and a half now.

On the wedding day, everything went according to plan. Everyone was on time to hair and make-up, pictures went flawlessly, the weather cooperated with everything, Chris didn’t attempt to talk to me at all- it was a perfect day to watch two people who love each other commit to the other for the rest of their lives.

But then came the reception. That’s when I knew apparently all bets would be off. The ceremony was over. Niceties would wear off as more and more alcohol is consumed. I was not looking forward to it.

We make our ridiculous entrances and take our seats at the head table. We eat then speeches were made. Lots of laughs were had as the Best Man dished on stories he had with the groom growing up, a few tears were shed at her sister’s after recounting the moment the bride knew he was the man of her dreams- overall I’d say they were a success.

Again, I felt his eyes on me, burning holes in the side of my head from the other side of the groom for the entire dining portion of the evening. I kept myself from glancing in his direction, instead focusing on the conversations with the bride’s sister next to me and my boyfriend who is across the way- anything not to meet his eyes.

Finally the DJ announces it was time for all to convene on the dancefloor after the specialty dances. I immediately see my boyfriend start to stand, knowing he’d been ready for this all night. I’d been looking forward to dancing with him all night as well, I even removed my shoes in anticipation. As I stand up, a hand is held out in front of me. I knew whose hand it was. I remember staring at it as he would rub his lips on our date. The strength of it as it intertwined with mine as we walked down the streets of our town, the safeness I felt as he squeezed it if he detected I was getting anxious around a group of people and I needed the reassurance. I knew that hand well, unfortunately.

“Dance with me?” He nearly whispers in my ear. I didn’t realize he was that close until I could feel said whisper on my neck. I contain the shiver that runs down my spine at how husky his voice is. God I’ve missed that…

No! I will not be enchanted by him again. He does not deserve me.

I exhale the breath I was holding, it comes out a lot harsher than I expected. “No, thank you.” I turn away from him, but his hand gently grabs my arm stopping me from going any further.

He whispers again, “He’s not good enough for you,” before walking away.

I’m frozen in place. I glare at his retreating back as he makes his way over to the bar. My mouth hangs open in disbelief. How dare he… How fucking dare he assume anything about me or my relationship. He doesn’t know anything about what our relationship is like. My boyfriend treats me so well, spoils me even though I know I don’t deserve it. He listens to me, he cares about me, and he makes me laugh until I cry- he’s everything I’ve wanted in a man. Chris is the one who had his chance and subsequently blew it. He has no right to judge or even comment on my relationship when he knows absolutely nothing about it.

I hurriedly make my way to my awaiting boyfriend and pull him onto the crowded dancefloor. “You okay?” He asks me, “Did he say something to upset you?”

“Nothing worth repeating.” All I wanted to do was forget about him and his irrelevant feelings towards my relationship…

…Except I couldn’t. His words rattled me. Does he see something I don’t? He told me on our date that he’s an excellent judge of character so he wouldn’t say something like that unless he got a bad feeling, right? Either that or he said it just to get under my skin and force me to talk to him. No matter the reason I hate him for it because my pride won’t let it stand.

I spot him leaning against the bar, staring directly at the two of us over the rim of his glass. His perfect eyebrow quirks up at the eye contact, that sets my blood to boiling. He thinks he’s so smug. I wish I could just slap that stupid hidden smirk right off his perfect face…

Following a few dances, I mutter something about him going to dance with the bride to my boyfriend before exiting the dancefloor. I rush out of the barn, away from the crowd needing some air from his suffocating gaze. I find a little lit area that’s perfect for pictures. There are rectangular hay bales set together as a makeshift U-shaped bench with some low watt bulbs strung up above between two poles. It would be serene if I weren’t already on edge.

After taking a few deep breaths, I finally feel like I can speak without yelling. “You had no right.”

I didn’t have to turn around to know he followed me out here. It’s exactly what I wanted him to do, just like it was his intention to get under my skin. As much as I wished to avoid this conversation it seems that we can’t go on without it. We may tear each other apart in the process, but this is my chance for closure. This is my only opportunity to get the answers I’ve been needing to move on for the past two years. Two years of wondering what went wrong after the most perfect date I’ve ever been on with an equally perfect man has been eating at my heart and mind. I hated always wondering “what if” or “what would I be doing right now if I were with him” especially when I started dating my boyfriend. I had no answers as to why those questions could not be. I thought with time I’d stop asking them, thinking I’d never see the man again. He’s a big movie star, why would he wonder about a woman he went on one date with?

As I expected, his deep baritone voice comes behind me, but his words do little to ease my nerves. In fact they set them off even more so than before. “I’m sorry.”

I scoff at his half-hearted apology, knowing he doesn’t mean it at all. “Oh bite me, Christopher.” I turn around to face him. God he looks even better out here. The subtle gold glow from the lights are complimenting his skin tone, they make his baby blues shine which just frustrates me more.

“Please, Y/N,-” He takes a step closer to me, but I won’t have that.

“No,” I take a step back keeping the needed distance between us for fear I may strangle him. “I don’t want to hear any of your bullshit excuses. You had no right to pass judgment on a relationship that you know absolutely nothing about.”

He slips his hands into the pockets of his dress pants. “Oh, I’ve seen enough.”

“Really?” I jut my hip out, resting my hand on it. “In the two days you’ve been here, you think you’ve got us all figured out?”

“Yes,” he answers with conviction.

My shaking hands clench into fists, trying my damnedest not to lose control. I entangle them into my hair as best as I can without ruining the work the hairstylist did this morning before running them down my face. He has some nerve.

“We had one night. One night! One nearly perfect night together and suddenly that makes you an expert on what is good for me?”

“I wouldn’t say ‘an expert’-”

“I wouldn’t say anything!” I interrupt, “I never heard from you again. Now after two years, you come in here acting like you know anything about me or my relationship? Who do you think you are?”

“A man who made a mistake!” He snaps.

There was a long pause. I never expected to hear that from him. All these years I wanted to think the worst of him for leaving me hanging like that. He got my hopes up, thinking we may have a future together only for them to come crashing back down to Earth when he never contacted me again. I wondered and wondered if maybe I read the signals wrong. Maybe I took his flirting as more than it was. Maybe the small gestures like his arm around my shoulders, on the small of my back, or the hand holding were only him being friendly. I wracked my brain going over every single detail of the night to try and pinpoint a reason for him not to have called me afterwards. I found nothing, which was equally as frustrating.

“Alright, I made a mistake.” He moves to sit on one of the hay bales. He rests his elbows on his knees and buries his head in his hands, letting out a huge sigh. “God I wanted everything with you.”

Once again, I’m frozen by his words. He what? But that doesn’t make sense. His words and his actions don’t line up- how could that be?

He removes his hands from his face, staring at the grass. “After that night, I wanted it all. I wanted to settle down, get the house with a white picket fence in the suburbs, carry you through the threshold after our wedding day, bring our children home from the hospital, watch them grow until we’re old and gray. I wanted everything.”

My heart aches. All of that was exactly what I wanted, especially with him. I could feel the tears building behind my eyes, my heart breaking mourning the loss of what we could have had by now if he had only said something.

I also find my anger growing as well. If he felt all of that, why did he not contact me again? Why did he give me hope that our night out together could have been the start of something good and then taken it away just as quickly?

“But?” There had to be a “but” coming after his statement. Clearly something stopped him from pursuing the possibility of “us,” destroying any future we could have had.

He sighs, “but…” he finally looks up at me with more emotion in his eyes than I was expecting. There was contemplation, confusion, honesty, agony…

I look away. In an instant I knew what he was about to say. It makes complete sense. He was at the height of his career, shooting movie after movie all around the world for a majority of the year. How would he have had time to have a relationship mixed in with that? He couldn’t.

“Your career was more important,” I interject, “I get it. I do.” I couldn’t fault him for choosing work over someone he just met, no matter how much he claims to have liked me right off the bat. He was going to be busy. We probably wouldn’t have had a lot of time to see each other. It’s not like I could give up my career to follow him. Besides even if I could have, he wouldn’t want that. He said so himself. He wanted someone who was independent; who could do their own thing and not be enveloped in his crazy life.

He stands up and steps closer to me, “no, that wasn’t it. I promise you that wasn’t it.”

There’s that word. Promise. He promised we’d see each other again soon after our night together. But he broke that.

“Then what was it?” My voice cracks at the end. I can feel my reserves slipping the more he speaks. I didn’t realize how much I missed his voice until now. I haven’t seen any of the movies he’s been in the last few years. I have him and his hashtag blocked on all social media platforms so I don’t see anything of his on any of my timelines. My other friends think I don’t like him (only my best friend and her now husband know about our date). To hear it again brings back all of the good memories we made together in that short night and all of the emotions I’ve been holding back since. “I have been wracking my brain for years wondering what went wrong after that.”

“I got scared,” he finally admits the truth. “I got scared of how much I liked you and how much I wanted to protect you.”

“From what?”

“From me,” he casts his gaze down at his hands as he fidgets with them, “and my life. I didn’t want to subject you to the chaos that is my life. I know what my fans would do to you if we were in a relationship, I was trying to protect you from all of the ugly that being with me comes with.”

So that’s what he was afraid of? He was afraid our relationship would inevitably end exactly like his last one? His “fans” were horrible to her. They sent death threats to her and her family members, always commenting negatively on her social media pages all because she was dating him. I remember reading about it right after it happened. I knew that side of his fandom was toxic. But did I care? No. Did I think I couldn’t handle it? I honestly don’t know, but would I have been willing to deal with it for him? Yes. I would have given up anything to be with him. That’s precisely why he did what he did. He didn’t want me giving anything up for him because he knows I’d be giving up any semblance of privacy I had if I were in a public relationship with him.

If I had known these were the reasons why he ghosted me, I would have been broken hearted but I would have understood. Hell, I probably would have fallen more in love with him if I knew that, not fallen in loathe.

He continues, “I thought that if I never contacted you again, you could move on”- he clears his throat-“and find someone better than me who could give you the normal life you deserve. Which as much as I wish I couldn’t, I see that you have…” he pauses as if deciding whether he should keep speaking. When I don’t stop him, he does, “But I can’t help feeling like that could have been me.”

My slightly shaky hands cover his fidgeting ones. His hand moves until he’s intertwining our fingers together, palms touching. They fit perfectly together as if they were each other’s missing puzzle piece. His thumbs stroke mine sending warmth down my arms all the way down to my toes. The sparks I felt back then return with full force. He leans down, pressing his forehead against mine. My heart is beating out of my chest, I wouldn’t be surprised if he didn’t feel it in some way.

I feel my heart break in my chest. My lip quivers and the tears threaten to make themselves known. My only saving grace is the fact that he can’t see my face. I may lose it completely if he did.

His breath is coming out equally as shaky between us, he squeezes my hands as if he doesn’t want me to let go. Believe me, I don’t want to. I bring one of our interlocked hands up to my lips. I kiss the back of his hand because I can’t kiss him where I want to. I pull back just enough to see his beautiful baby blues that could have any woman in the world swoon. They were terribly bloodshot right now but that only made them more tragically breathtaking. I tear one of my hands out of his and bring it to his cheek. He leans into it, a tear drops into the crevices between the contact.

The barely above whisper that came out was all I could muster without having a total breakdown because he’s right. It could have been him. We could have been something great. We could have built a life together. We could have had it all. And it broke my heart into a million pieces knowing all of this could have been avoided if life had handed both of us different lives.

“It almost was.”

~*~

Taglist: @the-marvel-wars @elusive-beauty @drakesfiance @im-a-slut-for-an-accent @fantasy-is-my-reality @princess-evans-addict

#almost #Chris Evans #christopher robert evans #christopher evans #chris evans x reader #chris evans imagine #chris evans drabble #chris evans oneshot #chris evans x female reader #chris evans x you #chris evans x y/n #jj ehlby writes

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hoodieofholland · 4 years ago

Note

Here is an ideia for a smut concept: Tom as been very stressed with work and one day he and the reader are going at it and he can't come and feels really bad and embaressed and the reader makes him feel better about it. Write it only if you feel comfortable about it of course. I love your fics by the way.

A/n: loved this concept so much, hope you like it. Got a bit long again lol ❤️ thanks for your comment :)

Masterlist Request/tell me your thoughts on this!!

NSFW content bellow

Warnings: smut, dirty talk, fingering (f rec), cockwarming, bit of angst, unprotected sex (pls use protection!!)

"Tom, I'm putting your bag in the car, okay? Have you got everything you need?", you shout as you crossed the corridor of you and Tom's bedroom with his bag in your hand. Both of you were in your way to the studios, Tom has been shooting Spider-Man 3 for a while now. With busy schedules, you two barely had the the time neither the energy to spend some time alone, so whenever you had a break from your work, you'd take the opportunity to make him company in his work. Right now, you were running out of time to make it to the studios in the right time, as you and Tom drifted in deep sleep and almost lost your time.

Tom didn't answer from the bedroom, and you decide to pop your head through the open door to check on him. "Hey, did you hear- Tom?"

You look at you boyfriend, who's currently sitting on the edge of your bed, elbows prompted over his knees and staring at the floor with nothing but a sad expression on his face.

"Tom? Is everything alright?" You ask softly as you drop the bag on the floor and make your way to him.

He glanced back at you with a sorry look, eyes dropping to the floor again as you kneel down and touch his thigh. "What's going on, baby? What happened?"

He sighed, brushing his hand over his face and pulling his hair a little. "I don't think- I don't think I can go today, y/n".

Confused, you furrow and straight your back to take a better look at him.

"How come?", you put your hand on his forehead as to check his temperature, a worried look on your face. "Are you sick? You feeling something-"

"No, darling, it's not that", he sighs impatiently. "I'm sorry, it's just that... I don't feel good, y'know? I'm tired. Like, really exhausted".

You blink a few times, trying to catch what he was saying, though you already new what it was all about.

You've seen Tom work really hard throughout the last three years, filming and being involved with a lot of projects. You always felt so proud of him, but at same time worried about how overwhelmed he might feel. You simply knew this day could come, and now there were you, taking a seat beside him and brushing his hair out of his face to reassure him.

"You've been working a lot, Tom". You say in a low and careful voice. "It's absolutely understandable that you feel tired".

Tom sighs and throws his body back on the mattress.

"Okay, I just need to... take a large cup of tea. Do you think you can get me, love? I promise I'll be down in five minutes, I don't think they'd be truly mad if I got twenty minutes later-"

"No, Tom", you sigh, climbing up on bed to lay beside him. Resting a hand over his chest, you look up at him. "You're not going today, okay? We staying home and taking a break".

Tom scoffed. "I can't just skip job, y/n", he sighed.

"Tom, be honest with me" you propped your elbow on the mattress and support your head on your hand. "We were about to head out for, like, half an hour ago and you can't seem to get out of bed yet. You're tired, it's fine. I'll call the team and tell them that you don't feel so good".

Tom grimaces and rub his hand over his cheeks. "That's not professional of me. I- I have a contract, I have people that are counting on me- I have you here, and it wasn't even your job to follow and help me while I'm working, but you're still here and I feel so stupid for being such a pussy and not being able to-"

"Thomas Stanley", you say sternly, lifting your body to sit on bed. "Don't you dare saying it again. Baby, you're so hardworking. There's no doubt in anyone's head about how dedicated you are and how strenuous you get with everything you're involved with. But you're human, Tom, and you're exhausted. There's no need to be ashamed of it".

Tom sniffs, pressing his nose with two fingers as he tries to gather his composure. He wasn't feeling like easing himself about it and you could feel it by the way he closed his eyes tightly.

"Okay, that's what is going to happen", you say, getting up from bed and clapping your hands together with determination. "I'm gonna call the directors, gonna say that you don't feel good and tell them you're sorry about it, but that they'll need to postpone the filming. Then I'm gonna run you a bath just how you like it and we're gonna order dinner, maybe some pizza. What do you think?"

Tom gumbled, feeling vexed that he couldn't argue with you, because you were right - there was no way he could go to work today. He knew if he tried to, he'd do a shitty job and feel even worse that he'd need to waste everyone's time again to redo it.

So he silently nodded, and you give him a small softly smile.

After calling the studio and telling them about Tom, you filled the bathtub with a warm water and his favorite bubbles.

When everything was ready, you called him out from the bathroom and reassured him some more, kissing his cheek as you gave him time to undress and get in the tub.

"I'm not getting in here without you", he stated, pulling his shirt off his head, a kind smile on his face. You bite your lips as you watch he taking his jeans off, his white boxers beautifully on display for you.

"It's supposed that you relax there. It's gonna be tighter if I get in with you, and you won't be able to spread out".

Tom snorts and gives you a smug smile. In no time, he grabs your waist and pulls you closer to his chest. "No way I'm buying that, love", then his feature turns goofy all of a sudden. "C'mon, I need you there with me. Hold you real tight so I can relax a little, eh?"

You laugh at his attempt and end up giving up, shoving his chest playfully to pull him away enough to take out your clothes.

Tom gets rid of his boxers, entering the bathtub next. Whilst, you are taking off your jeans. "You still coming?", he teases, eyeing you shamelessly. "Hurry up, darling, the water is amazing".

You poke your tongue out and giggle when get completely naked, testing the water temperature before entering it slowly. When you were about to sit in the opposite seat, in front of Tom, he shook his head and took your hand, signaling for you to come closer. “You’re too far. C’mere”.

Narrowing your eyes in a little protest, you did as he asked, not being able to turn down the offer to sit with your back pressed against his chest.

“You were supposed to be relaxed, Tom”.

“Well”, he wrapped his arms around you, hugging your body in the most comfy way possible. “How am I supposed to relax when my girl is right on the other side and not this close to me? See? Much better now”, he lowered his head to rest in the crock of you neck and you giggle for the tingle his breathe sent over your wet skin.

“You relaxed now?” You ask as your hands play dismissively with the bubbles in the water.

“Yeah”. He takes a few seconds to answer, and when he does, you can’t seem to believe in his words.

You turn your head to look at him, a furrow on your face. “Tom...”, you say in a concerned yet stern tone. “What’s up?”

He sighs and lifts his head from your neck. Chewing on his lips lightly, he looks at you. “I still feel kinda guilty. I mean, I was supposed to be working right now, and instead I’m taking a bath with you... It kinda of- embarrass me”, he confess, lowing his eyes to the water, a light pink flush on his cheeks.

You pout, feeling bad that he was still with that thought on his mind. Turning your body just enough to hold his face on your hands, you caress a finger on the smooth skin of his cheeks. “Tom, you shouldn’t be embarrassed for taking care of yourself. You’re just taking a day off, it’s not that big of a deal. No one would want you to have a breakdown in order to get work done, alright? Look at me”, you ask softly and he does so. “I’m so fucking proud of you, my love. Should never doubt that”.

His face lightens up a bit and you smile. “Okay?”

His eyes wander through your face, a bright shine on it as he seems to save every part of it. “Yeah. Thank you, darling”.

“Alright”, you smile wider. “Now, if you mind, I’d like to enjoy my bath”.

He laughs and holds you tighter, pressing his forehead to yours. “What would I do without you, my sweet girl?”

“Probably not much”, you joke, and he chuckles.

His voice is low and his face is centimeters away from yours. Two of his slender fingers rest on you chin as he brings you closer. “C’mere”.

It’s a matter of seconds until your lips as touching in a slow, sweet and soft kiss. It’s calming and relaxing, and you feel yourself melting in his arms. Tom parts his lips, and so do you, allowing his tongue to enter your mouth and touch yours seductively. Your hand goes straight to his neck, fingers curling up in his hair to bring him closer, deepening the kiss.

When he pulls away, his hands are on your waist, smoothing the bare skin. “Love you so much, darling”, he murmurs. “You’re just fucking perfect”.

You smile before bringing him to kiss you again. “Love you too, Tommy. So, so much”.

His lips are a little rougher now, tongues waging a battle as both of you get eager with the touching. You can feel his member pressed against your back getting hard, just in perfect sync with your pulsing heat, starting to claim for some sort of attention.

"Shit, that's relaxing", he says through kisses and you giggle, turning your body around to have a better angle. "Love these lips".

"Yeah?", you whimper as his mouth traces a new path, slowly going down your neck.

"Yeah" he breaths over the wet spot on your sensitive skin, and you shudder. "Love kissing your neck too. The way you get all excited 'bout it. Love how you get goosebumps over it. Always so responsive to me".

"You make me feel good, Tommy" you breath out, eyes closed as you enjoyed the moment.

His lips stops right on the edge of your shoulder, biting it slightly as a smirk makes its way to his face. When he's facing you again, you can tell his eyes are darker.

"Wanna make me relax, love?" He asks, voice husky. You nod once, fingers tightening on his hair.

"Tell me what can I do, Tommy?" You ask lowly, brushing your nose over his, though you knew the answer already.

Tom brings one hand to lay flat on your ass, squeezing it, while the other rested on your back. The tip of his tongue traces a wet path over your lower lip. "Ride me, darling, would you? Wanna feel you around me, this close".

"Mmm", you bite your lip to refrain a moan as you nod. You turn your body completely now, facing him, legs positioned to straddle him. He was hard already, his length pressed against his abs, the tip red and needy for you.

Tom's hand slides down your side from your back to your core, feeling your wetness and you buck your hips against his slender fingers. "Gonna prepare you for me, love".

He presses two fingers over your clit, rubbing it delicately in smooth circles as he watched your face draw all the pleasure. Though the feeling of him collecting your arousal to lead his fingers through your slit was already overtaking, you knew you wanted something else, so you touched his arm and pulled it away from you, taking his cock on your free hand.

"I want you now, baby. No foreplay".

He smirks lazily and helps you straighten your back, as you pumped him a few times, thumb caressing his tip and spreading the pre-cum. He growls, and you can see the veins on his neck outlining with the pleasure.

His grip on your ass gets more firm and you smile smugly as you position his cock right in your entrance. You brush it from your folds to your clit, teasing both of you a bit, before sinking down on him slowly. Tom closes his eyes at the sensation of your walls holding him tightly, coursing by every bit of his length that enters you.

You moan as soon as you feel him completely inside of you, walls adjusting to the stretch he gave you. Tom brings you closer, your boobs now pressed against his chest as both of you breath heavily.

“Shit”, he says. “So tight”, with the feeling of his teeth sinking on the skin of your shoulder, you buck your hips forward, to create some kind of friction, but Tom stops you right there. “Can we stay like this for a while?”

You look at him, hands grabbing his hair softly. “You don’t want me to move?”, you bite your lips when he nods, hands caressing your back up and down.

“Yeah. Wanna feel close to you and just-“ he breaths sharply and a deep groan comes through his throat at the feeling of your involuntary clenching, “just take it slow. Fuck, you’re gonna make it hard for me”.

You giggle and press your forehead to his. “I’ll behave”, you let out a heavy sigh. “You feel so good inside me. So deep”.

Tom takes the moment to kiss you, tongue slowly invading your mouth, in a messed way, as both of you released grunts and whines for the feeling of having each other so connected.

"You're so good to me, darling", he says when you pull apart, thumb tracing your puffy lips. You shudder at the feeling of his cock throbbing inside of you, closing your eyes briefly. "My gorgeous girl, taking such good care of me. Feels so snug around me, love".

You pant, biting hard in your lip as you find it extremely difficult not to move when your pussy clench at the sound of his words.

"Tommy, can't take it-" you breath out.

He squeezes your ass firmly, assaulting your neck with sloppy kisses. “Just a little more, pretty girl. Know you can”.

You moan when his lips connect with the sensitive skin bellow your ear.

“Shit”, you throw your head back. “Please, Tom”.

You can feel his smug smirk against your skin and want to slap him for that, but all is forgotten when he say, “It’s okay, darling, you can move now”.

You take it as your sign to move your hips up slowly, the friction getting more intense from the previous position. Your walls are sensitive, you can feel the wetness making it easier for you to move. “Fuck” you curse, gripping on his shoulders for dear life.

Tom tugged at your waist, helping you to stead a pace, when you sink down on him again. You started slow, just how you two felt like. His hands kept running on your skin, his mouth was glue to your ears, whispering motivating words to you.

“You’re so beautiful, riding me like this”

“Taking me so well”

“Gonna make me cum so hard”

His words were your fuel, and his touching ignited a fire inside of you. Soon, you were bouncing on top of him, water splashing everywhere, but you couldn’t care less about the mess on the floor. All you could focus about was the pleasure on Tom’s face, the way he gripped tight on your waist every time you swirled your hips and the need you had to chase your release.

“Fuck, Tom, I’m so close”, you moaned, hiding your face in the crock of your neck. You were growing tired, but still managed to keep moving. Noticing that you slowed down, Tom holds your hip and starts to buck his to meet with yours, his tip brushing on a special spot inside of you.

Your breathes were heavy, the sounds of the water among with skin slapping were all too much for you to take. Your rigid nipples were brushing against his toned chest, making you feel him everywhere. You moaned his name, clenching as your legs trembled. You knew you couldn’t last much longer.

“That’s it, baby” Tom panted, mouth on your ear as he bites your lobe. “C’mon, cum on my cock”.

And as easy as his command, you fell apart. The shocks ran through your body as Tom still pounded in you, chasing his release, following right after yours. Your walls clenched around him, riding both of you out of the recent orgasm.

A panting mess, the two of you stayed still, hugged tight on each other’s arms, catching your breath. You feel his length softening inside of you, and when you climb out of him, you feel his cum dripping out of your pussy too.

Tom had that light pink on his cheek, from the effort, and a beautiful brightness on his eyes. You smiled at him, who did the same and stretched his arms to reach you, holding your body just like when you entered the bathtub.

As he kissed the top of your head, you could hear his breathing still heavy and relaxed into his arms. After a few minutes of silence, just enjoying each other’s warmth, Tom speaks.

“Thank you, darling”, his words were soft, just like the brushing of the tip of his fingers on your face. “I mean, not for this”, he chuckled, and then sighed. “But for really taking care of me. You’re always so understanding”.

You turn your head and give him a sweet smile, full of the love you shared with the man of your life. “That’s because I love you, Tommy. And you don’t have to thank me for that”.

“I love you too, sweetheart. A lot”. He pressed a kiss to your lips.

Turning your soft smile into a smirk, you add, “Are you feeling more relaxed now, though?”

He laughs and kiss your cheek. “Absolutely”, licking his lips, he watches you with bight eyes. “But I’d love to repeat the relaxation session”.

…………………

Taglist: (add yourself to my taglist here)

@pinkrockstar19 @onyourgoddamnleft @spideyspeaches @miraclesoflove @zspideyy

#tom x reader #tom holland #tom holland blurbs #tom holland imagines #tom holland fic #tom holland smut #request #anon #boyfriend!tom #Tom smut

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basilly · 4 years ago

Text

no song without you || irl!karl x reader

moments throughout your relationship with karl <3

note: this is a song fic for the lovely @b3l0v3ds ! please check nyx out, she’s amazing <3

song: no song without you by HONNE

pronouns: they/them

lyrics in bold

edited by: @notphilosopherstudentblog

Ooh, I'd be nothing without you Ooh, there'd be no song without you, without you

the music softly played from the speakers as you and karl swayed back and forth, karl’s hands on your hip and yours on his shoulders. the stars illuminated the sky, the only other light coming from the lights hung from the flowered gazebo.

"i don’t know what i’d do without you.”

you stared into his beautiful slate gray eyes, his staring right back with so much love and adoration. you wanted this moment to last forever, etched in your memory.

When I'm down and out And feel like there is nothing left for me You save me

dropping your head into your hands, you couldn’t help but groan. you were exhausted, the clock ticking each passing second, the face reading a late 3 am. you were drowning in work and you felt like it would never end. taking a deep breath, you picked up your pen to begin writing once more.

a soft knock brought you out of your focused, yet exhausted, trance. karl pushed open the door, accidentally hitting the crinkled paper bag of fast food against the door. walking towards you and setting the bag on the table, he could only express lots of concern. taking his hands to rub against your tense shoulders, he presses a soft kiss to your head.

“hey love, you should eat and take a break. i know you’ve been working hard and i’m proud of you, but you need a break.”

karl was your saviour in hard times, no matter when or where.

Ooh, I feel nothing without you Ooh, there'd be no song without you, without you

you rolled over in the soft cotton sheets once more, sheets that couldn’t replace the warmth of your missing boyfriend. karl had gone on a quick trip with the mr. beast crew and would be back in a couple days, but without his presence, sleeping became impossible. you wanted nothing more than karl’s arms wrapped around your torso as you fell into a deep sleep.

as if he could sense your discomfort, your phone lit up, displaying karl’s contact photo on a call.

“hey karl” “oh- did i wake you up love?” “no, i can’t sleep” “i’m sorry im not there to hold you- i wanted to call and say goodnight.” “karl?” “yea?” “can you tell me about your day until i fall asleep? its hard without you.” “of course :)”

that night you fell into a comfortable slumber, karl’s voice lulling you to sleep.

When I got into a fight, and you stood right up for me You save me, you save me

“y/n you’re being an awful friend- i needed you and you were gone” “don’t you dare call y/n that- they’ve done nothing but support you and they have their own life too. they’re not required to be there at your beck and call- especially when you never support them.”

karl held you in his arms, allowing the tears to spill from his face. pulling back, karl tries to meet your eyes. gently wiping away your tears, karl rests his hands on your cheeks, forcing your eyes to meet his.

“you’re a wonderful person, don’t let anyone tell you different.”

When I worry about some stupid shit You always reassure me You save me

insecurities bit into your conscience like a hungry monster. you couldn’t help it, there were so many stunning individuals that karl could’ve chose instead of yourself. the same question would flash across your mind, “why me?”

staring at yourself in the mirror, you nitpicked every inch of yourself. picked out the tiniest details, slowly hating your own reflection more and more.

karl felt something was off, you had spent a long time in the bathroom, longer than usual. walking up to the bathroom, he startles you by making a small thump against the door frame.

“y/n- what are you doing?”

you could only avoid his gaze, crossing your arms across your body. karl noticed this move, confused.

“k-karl, why me?” “what?” “i look so- boring. i’m nothing special and-”

karl rushed forward to cradle your face and pressed his lips against yours, effectively shutting you up. then he started planting small feather-light kisses all over your face.

“you are so so gorgeous, y/n, i love you, for you. no matter what you look like. whether straight out of bed, messy hair, disheveled, or all dressed up in your best clothes. i’m sorry i haven’t been able to show you how perfect you are, but you will and always will be perfect to me. no one compares to you.”

the tears eventually fall, but the ends of your lips curl up into a grateful smile, karl will always be there.

Ooh, I'd be nothing without you Ooh, there'd be no song without you, without you

an: yikes,, first attempt and idk how to feel abt it

taglist: @salinesoot @bozowrites @big-gay-nerd-420 @somemothgoingferal @kai-was-here @xoxothornbudoxox @nitejade @truthfulsyncerity @forutheworld @losingvienna @luluwinchester @cr0wbonezz-wr1ting-inc @dreamiewrites @a-simp-for-block-people @dysfunctionalcrab @ella-ivanov @akasuki @brainsanalysis @bioluminescentfrog @momo-has-a-gun @korylyzed @etherealexsistence @sleepysoupi @notgeoreg @ialexabsuniverse @disastrousdream @inniterhq @bugthegremlin @spoonz @god1ngs @sabinanotfound @stuffforreferences @crybabyjabby @twitchchatvroom @mack4676 @esylwen @notphilosopherstudentblog @oh-mcyt @dirty-candie @ohhonk

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comfortwriting · 4 years ago

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A Triwizard Baby Part 4 - F.W

Masterlist, Requesting Rules, Writing Prompt Masterlist

Fred Weasley x Fem Reader

Part 4 of my ‘Triwizard Baby’ mini-series, please read Parts 1, 2, and 3 if you haven’t already. Want to be tagged? Let me know!

Warnings: Swearing, Mention vomiting, and food/eating.

"Girls" you sighed, watching them finally stop jumping on their beds and dropping their pillows "There's something I need to tell you."

You and Angelina shared a glance, she knew and so did you - you were finally ready, to tell the truth. Hiding this - hiding the truth about you and Fred had caused you enough pain, and the longer you decided to hide this, the worse the pain would get.

"What is it?" Katie asked, already concerned, no longer giggly or excitable.

Staring and picking at your fingernails, you finally looked each of your friends in the eyes, your heart thumping in your chest with each breath.

"I'm ready to tell you" you sighed again "who the father is."

They all stayed silent except Matt's little sister, "who is it?" she asked quietly.

"Fred," you blurted out, unable to hide his name for much longer "Fred Weasley is the father."

"I've told you" Fred hissed "don't bloody speak to me!" he stormed in front of George, stamping his feet, furious his backstabbing brother would dare to even speak to him.

Fred was exhausted from sleeping in the room of requirement alone and no one to talk to, he was pissed off with his brother, frustrated that you weren't his and that everyone around him avoided him as if he had a curse. For the first time in his life, he left as if he had run out of luck.

George grabbed him by the arm "Freddie, please-"

"No!" Fred shoved George's grip off him "You're jealous, you always have been."

George opened his mouth to speak, but couldn't get a word in.

"You always have been, every girl I've been with, you've chased after when I'm done with them. You can't stand the fact I fucked her, and you've rubbed it in my face that you've knocked her up!" Fred's voice cracked "And I told you, I loved her!"

"Fred, I-"

"Do me a favour, Georgie, don't speak a word to me at the baby shower, unless you want a crib smashed against your stupid head!"

"Keep those eyes closed!" Angelina grinned, her hands covering your eyes as she walked you through the rented restaurant covered in banners, balloons, a buffet table and presents.

"I am!" you smirked, feeling slightly nervous, smelling the mouth-watering fruit juices and pies.

"Okay," Angelina smiled, removing her hands "open in three, two, one!"

Opening your eyes you looked across the huge room, your friends were all huddled together with party poppers, yelling "Surprise!" and pulling the string, confetti shooting across the room, Fred sat alone across the room, trying his hardest to show support and be happy for you, but his heartbreak was breaking through his persona better than he thought.

You were bombarded with presents for you and the baby: the new crib, clothes, socks, bottles, nappies, monitors, teddy bears, and blankets - you unwrapped everything which brought the biggest smile to your face and tears of happiness to your eyes.

Everyone made bets on whether you would have a girl or a boy, what time and day they would be born on, and how long the labour would be. Even you had to admit, you were having a good time and for the first time in a while, the smile on your face was genuine, not forced.

After hours of present opening, games, bets, and food, you and the girls cleaned up the confetti, empty plates and scrunched up wrapping paper. Fred slowly approached you and tapped you on the shoulder, turning around to look at him, your heart pained.

Tell him, everyone knows but him, just tell him!

"Freddie-"

"Y/N, can I have a moment?" he murmured.

The girls looked at the two of you standing in the middle of the room, they exchanged looks and nodded, leaving to give you both some privacy.

"I wanted to give this to you in private," Fred said softly, handing you a large faux dragon scale photo album "I ran out of time to wrap it, was up all night finishing it."

You stared down at the photo album and opened it, your heartbreaking with each turn of the page. Pictures of you and Fred throughout the years, followed by his little notes of when and where the picture was taken until you flicked to the empty pages, you stared up at him.

Tell him, now is a perfect time-

"Fred, please-"

"The blank pages are to fill with pictures of us and the baby," he said softly "that's if the father won't mind."

George entered the room again, not knowing his brother was still there.

"Y/N, I was thinking-" he stopped in his tracks, looking at his brother's face dropping.

"Congratulations, again." Fred walked away, pushing past his brother and out the door.

"They are Braxton Hicks, my dear." Madame Pomfrey waved her hand, helping you to your feet in the hospital wing.

Your hand rested on your bump "I'm sorry, what?"

After your little moment with Fred, your womb contracted and relaxed, disturbing your baby, causing it to lash out and kick against your tummy in discomfort from the contractions. You were frightened and sure you were going into labour and George rushed you to the hospital wing.

"Is she going to be okay?" George asked nervously.

"False labour pains" she replied "and if you go to the tournament tonight you'll be experiencing more of them!" she stressed.

"I can assure you I won't be doing backflips," you grumbled, "surely it will be safer for me if I sit down."

Madame Pomfrey held her nose up in the air, feeling slightly defeated "I can't stop you from going, but as long as you're sitting down and surrounded by a responsible group of friends, I don't see why you can't go."

"I'll take good care of her, I swear."

"Your brother couldn't!" Madame Pomfrey hissed "she's in this mess because of him, and I better not see you two back in here until that baby is ready!"

The loud band played along as everyone got seated high up in the stands, the girls on your left, and George on your right, you held onto his hand, still on edge from the sudden Braxton Hicks. You rested your head against his shoulder, Fred stared at the back of your head, his hands bunched into fists, regretting his decision to sit towards the back.

Everyone was on the edge of their seats, Fleur had failed, Krum evidently had too - now - it was between Cedric and Harry, the champion being a Hogwarts student was certain, but still, undecided whether that champion would belong to Hufflepuff or Gryffindor, like many others in the stands, your fingers and toes were crossed for Harry taking the win.

Out of nowhere, Cedric came stumbling out of the maze, covered in dirt, sweat, and blood, his shirt sticking to him and his hair ruffled, scratches across his delicate face. He crouched down, clearly out of breath, but so startled and shaken up that he was shaking and green in the face.

The crowd jumped to their feet, cheering for Harry and Gryffindor, holding their red banners and waving their flags in the air whilst Syltherin scowled and hid their faces in their hands.

"We need to go and see if he's alright!" Angelina panicked hearing Cho shriek, the girls got on their feet and hurried down the stairs, running out to Cedric who was now on his hands and knees on the grass, throwing up.

"Well, are you coming!?" Angelina asked George, holding out her hand.

George looked at you, he didn't want to leave you on your own and you knew it.

"Go," you reassured him "I'll be okay."

You watched Cedric gain the courage to speak, you tried to lip read but he was too far away for you to even make out a single word, but whatever he had said panicked the cheering girls and proud lads because now they were muttering, whispering and all appeared to be frightened and anxious, no longer in the mood to celebrate Harry's win.

Katie who didn't leave you behind shot a scowl at Fred who continued to stare at you, she moved closer to you whilst Angelina and George hurried back, horror across their faces.

"What's happened?" you panicked.

"It's Harry" George frowned "The cup, it was a portkey and he's gone, Cedric said-"

Angelina nudged George with her elbow, glaring at him and shaking her head "not now, George."

"No, what is it?" you demanded.

Just as George announced the news that the dark lord had returned, you felt major discomfort and a dull ache in your back and lower abdomen, along with the pressure that increased in your pelvic, you gripped onto your bump and winced.

"George!" you panicked "It's happening!"

The father of your baby watched as you went into labour, Katie and Angelina helped you to your feet as George hurried over to Madame Pomfrey, everyone around you started to panic and gave you all the room you needed to evacuate safely back into the hospital wing - the one place you didn't want to end up twice in one day.

Leaving you behind, George stared up at Fred who was sat as still as a statute, if you weren't going to tell him, George had to, he wouldn't allow his brother to miss the birth of his child.

George stumbled over to his brother and shook him angrily "I don't want to bloody argue but listen to me!"

"George, I told you-"

"You're the dad, alright!" George yelled, "She's having your baby, you need to get to the hospital wing now!"

"What are you on about?" Fred argued, not believing the word "are you seriously-"

"Think back to the party when you played truth or dare! Think for Merlin's sake!"

Fred shut his mouth and suddenly, his world began to spin so fast his heart could've stopped.

“I want you.” you breathed, pulling away from the kiss “I want you to fuck me like you do everyone else.”

“I want you too” Fred replied, taking your hand and fleeing from the party.

“Are you ready, Y/N?” Fred asked, pulling away from your breasts.

“Yes,” you breathed out, slurring slightly “I’m ready Freddie.”

The memories suddenly flashed before his eyes, the sight of your naked body beneath his, the two of you climaxing, Fred pulling out and falling into your arms, only to wake up the next morning in an empty bed that smelled of your hair and perfume. It reminded Fred that he had forgotten to put a condom on, George wasn't lying, he is the father of your child.

Fred's eye widened and he bolted from his brother, shoving everyone aside and sprinting for his life to the hospital wing, no one and nothing could stop him now.

The doors of the hospital wing swung open, laying in your bed, tears rolled down your face as the contractions worsened, Madame Pomfrey urging you to keep pushing. Fred pulls out a chair and sits beside you, holding your hand, comforting you, kissing your forehead and encouraging you.

You opened your mouth to speak: you wanted to say sorry, to tell him you loved him, you wanted to explain everything all at once, but you were unable to - the pain increasing, causing you to scream out, tears rolling down your face.

"Almost there Y/N, you're crowning!" Madame Pomfrey announced.

Fred planted another kiss on your sweaty forehead "keep pushing sweetheart," he said softly "you're doing so bloody well!"

Within a few moments, the sound of your babies cries rang out through the hospital wing, Madame Pomfrey placed the baby in your arms, encouraging you to sit back and relax - but you couldn't you still had the urge to push.

"I need to push again, "you cried, gritting your teeth "I'm not done!"

Madame Pomfrey's mouth dropped, causing her to take the baby from your arms and handing the newborn to Fred.

"What's going on?" Fred panicked, gripping onto his child, already feeling the protectiveness kick in.

"There's another baby..."

"She's having twins?!"

Fred held the elder newborn in his arms whilst the younger and smaller newborn rested in yours, both of them just like their father; a full head of ginger hair.

"They're yours." you croaked, your. throat sore from all the screaming and crying.

Fred smiled, tears forming in his eyes as he rocked the baby in his arms "I know, they look just like me... their hairs..."

"I'm so sorry, Freddie, I didn't tell you because... because I didn't know what to do, you're my best friend and I've had feelings for you since the beginning and I felt as if you didn't feel the same, I thought that me forcing a child upon you would... would ruin what we had."

"Of course I feel the same," Fred replied "I just didn't know if you did."

The two of you went silent for a moment, the twins sleeping - they were exhausted from being brought into the world earlier than expected.

"Do you still feel the same?" you asked Fred, staring into his pride-filled brown eyes.

He nodded "Yeah, do you?"

Everything you had ever wanted finally arrived, the children you were carrying - so eager and excited to meet, and the man of your dreams, finally on the same page as you - who had been in love with you for all this time.

You looked down at the baby in your arms and then back up at Fred, "I do too."

"Shall we have a fresh start?" Fred smiled "As parents and that."

You broke out into a light laugh and smiled "I'd like that, Freddie. I'd like that a lot."

There was another silence, it felt as if the world was sleeping.

"So, when can we make another one?" Fred winked.

"When we graduate from Hogwarts!-"

"Next year?" he raised an eyebrow.

"You didn't let me finish! We need to graduate, get stable jobs and have a house with enough room!"

"So next year then?" Fred smirked, still cradling the baby.

Your furrowed your brows, unsure whether or not he was bluffing.

"Okay then, since you're all confident, let's make a bet." You smirked back.

"If I win, we make another baby, if you win... we get married," Fred said softly as the baby opened his eyes and let out a cry.

"Alright," you agreed, taking your baby from Fred, trying to breastfeed "but what is your obsession with making another one?" you asked, "we've just had twins!"

Mr and Mrs Weasley were slowly approaching the hospital wing, George following not far behind.

"Yeah, which I've only just found out are mine!"

The hospital wing doors opened, Molly and Arthur standing in the doorway, staring at you, their son, and their grandchildren.

taglist: Taglist: @amourtentiaa @horrorxweasley @alwaysnforeverfangirl@reeophidian @inglourious-imagines @sebby-staan @onlyfreds@pandaxnienke @xmalfoyweasleyx @manuosorioh@cosmiccomicloverqueen @the-romanian-is-bae @fhhsposts@cavalinhox @purple-vodka-99 @simpforweasleys2@dracoismybabey @statellitespidey @xuminghaosworld @michael-loves-chickens @simpforweasleys2 @freddie-weaselbee @itsnottlilly

#fred weasley #fred weasley x reader #fred weasley fanfiction #fred weasley x you #fred weasley imagine #george weasley #george wealsey x reader #george wealsey imagine #george weasley fanfiction #George Weasley one shot #harry potter fanfiction #Harry Potter fanfic #harry potter #weasley twins #the marauders #Remus Lupin x reader #Sirius black x reader #draco x you #draco x reader

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toomanystoriessolittletime · 4 years ago

Text

Going Back Home

Summary: Claire never thought she would be back in the town she grew up in. But after her fiancé broke off their engagement, leaving her 5 months pregnant and alone she found herself calling Frankie Morales in the middle of the night, one of her childhood friends who insisted that she booked the next flight out. Trying to fix her life with a little help from her friends she would find out soon that going back would be the best decision she ever made.

Pairing: Frankie Morales x Claire Beck

wordcount: 3.1k

Warnings: more or less unplanned pregnancy, break up, mentions of sexual encounters

A/N: I am a weak weak person so here it is, a chaptered fic. I will try to update this weekly, but no promises. Rating will go up later. I'm attempting slow burn. Let's see how slow lol Let me know what you think. Reblogs are, as always, appreciated 💙

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Even Though most of her happiest memories were connected with this town, the town she spent most of her life in, Claire never thought she actually would be back here. And certainly not pregnant and all by herself.

It wasn’t that she had been unhappy here. Claire just always wanted something… bigger. Something more. Something exciting. After her parents died and most of her friends moved away, there was nothing holding her back. Well, that wasn’t true. Frankie and Santiago were there. But only when they weren’t overseas or god knows where, which left her with her dream of being a journalist in a small town where she had no chance to ever make it.

She still remembered Santi’s face when she announced that it was her turn to leave just before they were about to be gone for months again. She had gotten a job in New York and thought for days about what to do until she took the job. That was eight years ago and they hadn’t seen each other in person since then.

Yet when she called Frankie three days ago in tears, it was like no time had passed. She wanted to call Santiago first, but she knew him. If she had told him what happened to her he would have gotten into his car and gotten to her, no matter if it took 3 straight days. No, she had called Frankie. He had listened to her for hours until he made her promise to book the next flight out.

When the fuck did her life become such a shit show?

Only a week ago, she had the dream job, was engaged and 5 months pregnant.

Claire was happy. Until her fiance came back from a work trip and suddenly announced that he wanted nothing to do with the child and moved out within days, leaving her on her own. Not even his phone number was working and she wasn’t gonna show up at his work. She wasn’t that desperate. She should have seen it coming. John never planned to have kids. But when Clarie found out that she was pregnant he had already asked her to marry him and maybe he was too proud to end the engagement back then. Thinking back maybe this was the reason he stayed. Because a part of him wanted to spend his life with her. They didn’t fight. He just moved out, told her that he would take care financially of her and the child, but that he didn’t want to be a father.

The first days she was just numb. Trying to wrap her mind around the fact that the man she thought she would spend the rest of her life with, left her while she was pregnant with a child they didn’t plan but that she loved without a doubt. That was what kept her going. Her little bean. Claire would do anything to protect her little girl.

The guys to this day called her bean. She found herself thinking more of them since John left. Even without seeing them in the last years, they still stayed in contact. Not a week went by where she didn’t receive a letter. They had a group chat that was only used when they were at home and the bachelor was on. Cause fuck did they all hate that show but they watched it anyways.

Claire was okay with the whole suddenly being on her own thing, until she felt her baby move for the first time and turned in her bed to wake her fiance, finding the side empty and cold. For one tiny moment, she had forgotten that she was alone in a city where she had only a couple of friends who were his friends rather than hers. She had always had a hard time finding friends. That probably wouldn’t change.

Sucking her bottom lip in, she rested one hand on her belly as she waited for her luggage to arrive. She slept almost through the entire flight. Claire had gotten rid of the last eight years of her life in the last 48 hours. She wanted to start fresh. She needed a fresh start. Even if she had no idea how to deal with all of this on her own.

A woman next to her helped her get her suitcases on the cart, noticing that Claire was on her own. Pushing the cart through security she saw Frankie as soon as the door opened and next to him Ben, Will and Santiago who all smiled at her, while she felt the first tears escaping her eyes.

She had met Ben and Will only a couple times, they were living an hour away, but they became part of the group immediately. Once upon a time her childhood best friend, Leah, was in that group too. Claire hadn’t thought of Leah in a long time. She had died in a car accident almost 12 years ago.

Arms pulled her in a warm embrace and even after years of not seeing each other for such a long time, she still noticed Frankie’s scent.

“We got you,” he whispered, kissing her hair. She sobbed once before she was pulled into Santi’s arms.

“Look at you,” he smiled before he looked down at her belly.

“And look at you?” he smiled and leaned down.

“Hello, this is your favorite Uncle speaking,” he winked, bending down to speak directly to her belly, making her chuckle.

“Oh please, we all know I’m gonna be the favorite, hey bean,” Will hugged her.

“Don’t listen to them baby girl, we know they're all gonna spoil you rotten,” she grinned, letting Ben kiss her cheek.

“So you’re staying?” Frankie asked and you nodded.

“I already called some realtors. I wanna get this over as quickly as possible. Already sold everything back in New York,” Claire said, looking at the two men who formed most of her teenage years.

“Okay. Let’s get you out of this airport first. You okay to stay with Frankie? He has the biggest house,” Santiago asked, pushing the cart as you slowly walked towards the exit with Ben’s arm around her shoulder.

“Uh… I don’t wanna impose. I could just take a room…”

“Fuck no. Stay at my place. It’s my Pa’s old ranch. I’m renovating it.”

“What? No way!” she said surprised but Frankie only nodded.

“Yeah after Liz and South America I needed something to keep me busy. Also needed more space for Elena,” he explained. A small smile sneaked to Claire’s face.

“I still can’t believe you’re a dad Frankie.”

“Can’t believe you gonna be a mom. Fuck we’re really adults now, huh?” he winked and Claire sighed.

“Certainly didn’t plan it that way. Or planned it at all,” she said sadly before she shook her head as if to get rid of the sad thoughts clouding her mind.

“I meant it, Claire. We got you. We are bored most times anyways.”

“Hey speak for yourself, Fish. I got a business,” Santi said.

“Yeah. Yeah. Me too. But after work you’re either drunk or after some pussy so?” Ben grinned, making her chuckle.

“So still no ladies in your life, boys?” Claire asked as they reached what definitely was Frankie’s truck. It had his company name on it. “Morales gardening”

“Nope. But now that you’re here we could finally….” Will started only for Claire to look away in disgust, making them all laugh.

“You ready to become a Daddy, Will?” she asked, her hands both on her belly.

“Uhm… of course?” he answered and she chuckled.

“That’s what I thought,” she patted his cheek.

“Come on. Let’s get you to bed. You must be exhausted,” Frankie said and opened the door for her.

“We’ll see you tomorrow for the BBQ,” they all waved. She waved back, letting Frankie help her inside before he closed the door behind her and hopped into the driver’s seat.

“BBQ?” she asked.

“Can’t blame the folks from wanting to welcome you, bean,” he winked.

“What folks?”

“Ya know. Folks. You gonna see,” he looked at Claire. He felt better now that she was here. Frankie had missed her these last years, the couple of calls throughout hadn’t nearly been enough. And when she called two days ago in tears… He would have gotten the chopper and flown over but he couldn’t risk it. He had to be on good behaviour to be able to keep seeing his daughter.

“I missed you, Francisco,” she whispered.

“Missed you too, Bean.”

The sun was already setting when Frankie drove down a familiar path. Claire had spent countless days on this ranch when she was younger.

“How is your Dad doing?” she asked softly and Frankie sighed as he killed the engine in front of the house.

“I fucking hate that I can’t take care of him on my own, but he’s hanging in there.”

“I’d like to visit him if you’re okay with that,” she reached over squeezing his hand and he looked at her with a small smile.

“I bet he would love that.”

“And I’m sure he would have wanted it this way, Francisco. You know your dad. He wouldn’t have wanted you to drop everything for him. Don’t be too hard on yourself,” she said quietly.

“Damn I really missed you Bean,” he shook his head.

“Missed you too,” she let her head fall against his shoulder.

Claire didn’t really have eyes for the house, all she wanted was to go to sleep.

“I finished the guest room this morning for you,” Frankie said, setting one of her suitcases down as he opened the door.

“Please tell me you didn’t work overnight to finish this,” she sighed looking at him. He was rubbing the back of his head, pulling the cap he was always wearing down and avoiding her eyes.

Knowingly she shook her head, but couldn’t help the smile sneaking to her face.

“I won’t say it. But please don’t touch the walls, they might still be wet,” he said and she chuckled.

“Okay. Bathroom is over there. The shower isn’t working yet but you’re welcome to use mine. Will is coming over to take a look and make this one work. Other than that if you need anything just ask. Until you found a place this is your home.”

“You really didn’t have to do this, Frankie,” she said quietly, feeling overwhelmed by all of this. So many things had changed in such a short amount of time for her and she only now seemed to realize that she was indeed about to be a single mom.

“I wanted to. You’re… You don’t deserve to be treated like this. So let us help you, okay?” he said softly and she nodded but avoided his eyes.

“Okay. Go to sleep. My room is down the hallway if you need anything,” he stepped closer, kissing her forehead and for one tiny moment, she felt like the 15 year old teenager again who was crushing on Frankie Morales.

“Good night, Francisco,” she smiled.

“Good night, bean,” he whispered before he turned around and closed the door behind him.

Claire looked around, in awe of the room, the bed looking so inviting to her. Sighing she walked over to the window, knowing she would be able to see the whole property during the day. Crossing her arms in front of her she closed her eyes, listening to the sounds of nature that she had no idea she had missed living in the city for all these years. She felt a fluttering in her belly, her hand wandering down to feel a kick.

“We’ll be happy here, I promise,” she vowed, rubbing over her belly.

She didn’t want to disturb Frankie, even though she could hear the TV running so she just washed herself at the sink before she put her Pajamas on and sat down on the bed. She would unpack tomorrow. For now she had to sleep.

The sun wasn’t even up when Claire woke up. She turned in bed, propping herself up so she could look out the window and watch the sunrise. She had to make a plan. A plan that included finding a house, a doctor and help. Though help would be her smallest problem. She already looked at houses in the area and it didn’t look good. If she had more time she would buy the house just down this road, but there was no way the house would be ready before her due date. She would ask Santi for help. He had a lot of connections through his business. Though Frankie too. Claire knew that he had a little gardening company since he lost his pilot’s license. He never really talked about it, but then again, they didn’t talk that much. She knew that he had some problems with drugs in the past, but that he has been clean for almost two years and was doing better. She also knew that there was a lot more to this story then he had told her. Maybe they would have time to talk. To really talk. Groaning to herself, her quiet and peaceful morning was interrupted by her bladder. Time to start the day.

For a minute she wondered if she could risk sneaking into Frankie’s room to take a shower when she heard music playing. Grabbing her bathrobe and toiletries she opened the door and walked down. Now being really awake she had time to take in the house. It seemed like there still was a lot to do. The walls were still unpainted, the floors still old, though she could see he already started with the floor the closer she got to the kitchen.

Frankie was sitting at the kitchen island, a cup of coffee in front of him as the radio quietly played in the background. He had a serious case of bed hair and she smiled to herself. He hadn’t noticed her yet and she found herself thinking back to all the times she had thought that maybe there was something more in between them than friendship. And maybe there was at one point a long time ago. But that was before he joined the military. She might be selfish for it, but she couldn’t be in a relationship where her partner was gone all the time. She needed someone to be there. Even Though there had been times in the past she had found herself asking if maybe she should have risked it.

Instead she had slept with Santiago.

Yeah, that was a big fuck up. Well it was also a pretty good fuck but it was just once and they definitely were better off as friends. She still didn’t know if Frankie knew. Not that she had to explain herself. Frankie always knew what effect he had on the women around him, and he sure as hell took advantage of it. And now she felt nothing more than love for him. As a friend, nothing more.

“Good Morning,” she said quietly and Frankie turned his head, yawning at her.

Chuckling she walked over taking in the kitchen, setting her toiletries down.

“You weren’t kidding when you say you were still renovating,” she sat down next to him. He got up from his seat walking over to fix her a mug of tea.

“Still hooked on Strawberry tea, I hope?” he asked and she nodded, surprised that he remembered.

“Yeah. Though the kitchen and living room are supposed to be finished by the end of next week. So sorry for the noise in the next couple days,” he walked over and set down the mug of tea in front of her.

“Hey it’s your house. I’m just thankful you let me stay.”

“Of course. Couldn’t let you stay in the dumpster motel in this town,” he winked. She took a sip of the tea and it was perfect.

“So what are you planning for today?” he asked.

“I probably should start looking into houses. I’m kind of on a timetable here,” she rested one hand on her belly and Frankie followed her movement.

“Yeah. I think Pope already called someone for some houses. It’s not looking good.”

“Yeah I thought so. Everything I found on the internet was in really bad shape,” she sighed.

“It’s gonna work out. And if you don’t find something, you’re welcome to stay. The place is big enough,” he shrugged and Claire laughed quietly.

“Yeah I bet you can’t wait to live with a hormonal pregnant woman and then with a newborn,” she joked.

“I lived with Pope. Nothing can be worse and…”

“And?” she asked.

“I already lived with a hormonal pregnant woman. It’s not that bad,” he shrugged with a small smile. She looked at him with a small smile on her face.

“You say that now. Wait till I’m craving your mug cake at 3am now that I’m living with you,” she joked. Frankie laughed.

“Wow I haven’t had one of those in at least 10 years.”

“Well then it’s about time.”

“Yeah,” he sighed, looking at Claire. She looked more relaxed today, like she had a good night’s sleep and he was thankful he put in an overnight to finish the guest room for her. She deserved to relax. When she told him that she not only was pregnant but dumped by her fiance Frankie was furious, yet at the same time he already decided that he would take care of her and help her with everything she needed. It was the least he could do.

Even though they grew apart in the last years, she still was one of his best friends.

“Okay. I’m gonna go take a shower. I got to drive out to check on a project. You gonna be okay here for a while?” Frankie asked. Claire nodded, grabbing her mug of tea.

“Just tell me when you’re going out so I can take a shower,” she said.

“Thank you, Frankie,” she whispered when she stopped next to him and softly kissed his cheek, before she walked down the hallway. Frankie looked after her with a soft smile before he got up to get ready to head out.

Next chapter

#my writing #going back home #frankie morales #francisco morales #frankie morales x ofc #pedro pascal #fanfiction #fanfic #fan fiction #fan fic #frankie morales fanfiction

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jeongvision · 4 years ago

Text

bandaids

synopsis. in the midst of finals season, where routine takes over your lifestyle, you find solace in the voice of your most important person that always seem to know when you’re at your breaking point.

pairing. boyfriend! kim doyoung ✗ student! fem! reader

genre. fluff, angst, slice of life, hurt/comfort, college au, non idol au, established relationship au

word count. 1.8k words

warnings. cursing, mentions of anxiety, depictions of a mental breakdown

song. bandaids by keshi

author’s note. after looking at my calendar, it has come to my attention that it’s that time of the year: finals season. i just want to let all of you know that you are doing a great job. you made it this far and i’m proud of you. i promise you, you will get through this. hopefully this could give comfort in the midst of your studies. love you all.

friends of flowers fragile silence stand beside you stop your crying

If there is one thing that all college students could agree on, it’s that finals seasons are the absolute worst thing to ever go through in college. You’re constantly spending every night at the library with your eyes glued onto your textbooks, your brain rushing to keep up in retaining all the pertinent information needed for your exams. You’re devoting hours onto your laptop with your fingers typing away on your keyboard, internet tabs and pages cluttering your screen as you rush to reach the minimum page count required for your courses.

So many times you have declined all your friends’ requests for study dates or a simple get-together because you just don’t have the luxury to. As much as you’d love to take a break from your studies, you feel like you’re running out of time. It has gotten to the point where your boyfriend has to remind you every now and then to take breaks as he gets concerned for your well-being. And just when you thought you were done with one exam or assignment, you look back on your planner only to find out that there’s more to complete. It’s like your pile just doesn’t seem to lessen with each passing day, your mentality on the brink of collapse.

Just where is the end to all of this?

You are currently perched over your desk, packets of case studies splayed out on top of your corrections textbook. Your laptop screen shines bright at the corner, documents filled with infinitesimal texts and numbers. To your right lies your essential oil diffuser, planted right on your nightstand with fumes of aroma wafting through the air. You took your best friend’s suggestion in purchasing an aromatherapy diffuser to help relieve some stress you’ve accumulated from your studies. Lavender should help out, she said. But to your dismay, you don’t feel a single ounce of it lifting from your shoulders. Forcing your brain to believe its effective properties only puts your head more into a strain.

That’s when you felt a sharp pain rip through your skull. ‘Great,’ you groaned to yourself, ‘another fucking headache.’ You dropped your pen on your notebook and rubbed your fatigued eyes, the pressure from your fingertips massaging away. “God, I can’t wait for this semester to be over with already.”

Crossing your arms, you found your phone lying in the middle of your bed. You forgot that you left it on ‘do not disturb’, finally realizing why you didn’t hear your phone ring in the past few hours. You grabbed your phone off your bed. 2:58 am, it reads. Unlocking your phone, you skimmed through your notifications, your fingers swiftly responding to certain messages cluttered up in your phone until you reached to this one particular conversation:

hey babe (sent by doie <3, 11:01pm)

hope you’re eating your meals and drinking water (sent by doie <3, 11:01pm)

just want to let you know that i’m proud of you (sent by doie <3, 11:02pm)

always am and always will (sent by doie <3, 11:02pm)

love you (sent by doie <3, 11:02pm)

You could feel a smile blooming on your lips. It has been a while since you’ve seen Doyoung, let alone hear his voice. Is it too late to call him? ‘He might be sleeping,’ you thought to yourself. ‘Should I?’ Biting your lip, you mustered up the courage and decided to call him. Placing your phone against your ear, you awaited his call. The sound reverberates through your eardrums, the anticipation of having your call picked up diminishing with each passing ring. And just when you were about to give up, the tune stops short on its last ring.

“Hello?” a deep voice croaks.

You softly smile at the sound of his voice. “Hey,” you whispered. “Did I… wake you up?”

“No, no.” You hear him shuffling on his end, to what you could assume to be from his movements in his bed sheets. “Not at all, baby.” You couldn’t help but let out a giggle, touched over the fact he’s easing your guilt of awakening him from his much-needed slumber. “What’s wrong? You need something?”

You shrugged your shoulders, a habit you’ve developed when talking on the phone with someone. “No, not really.” You run your fingers through your hair before rubbing the nape of your neck. “I just missed you, that’s all.”

He lets out a tired chuckle. “I missed you, too.”

You hum a little, “How are your finals?”

He scoffs. “Shit.”

“Not surprised,” you giggled. “You only have one more left, right?”

“Yeah. Chem 4. After that, I’m ready to sleep for a whole week straight.”

“Can I join you in your sleeping session?”

“You most certainly can.”

You both shared a laugh, your mind finally distracted from the strenuous documents that resided on top of your desk. “I call dibs on being the small spoon.”

He chortles. “You’re funny.”

“Hey! It’s only fair.”

“That’s what you said when you ate my share of fries the other week.”

His voice was much livelier than before, fully awakened from his rest now. You missed the jolly feeling you’d get when you talked to him. All those days and nights spent by his side where nothing else mattered in the world except for your boyfriend, whispering loving affirmations to you just like always. You really did miss him, and you can’t wait for this semester to be over to spend quality time with him again.

“Hey, y/n?” he called out.

“Hm?”

“You know that all I ever ask of you is to be honest with me?”

Your smile drops. You know where this is going, and frankly, you’re not sure if you’re ready to have this conversation again. Time after time, he would start a conversation with that question followed by his ongoing concerns wrapped in his mind. Sometimes he would ask for your second opinion, but most of the time they were diverted to you, his forever lover. And you knew this time, this is going to be about you.

Your free hand fiddled with the ends of your finger as you chew on your lip again, your eyes peering down to your lap.

“... yes,” you murmured.

You could hear your heart beating through your ears, the silence deafening the space that encompassed you around. Neither one of you uttered a sound to the other, too afraid to whisper through the thick tension planted in the air. Outside your dorm, there are muffled footsteps fading in and out by your door, most likely from your dorm neighbors coming back from another one of their library sessions. He lets out a soft sigh on his end, not one filled with annoyance, but filled with worry, his attention all focused onto you.

“... are you okay?”

And just like that, you felt the dam inside you crumble to ashes. The mask that you’ve held from the past few weeks is finally dissolving, the facade released from its shackles. Weeks of putting up a front, telling yourself that everything is okay, is now coming to end. ‘I’m fine,’ you would say to yourself. ‘This is nothing, I can handle this myself.’

Oh but darling, there’s only so much you could take in. Not everyone is perfect, and not everyone is indestructible. May we all be human, for we laugh, cry, smile, frown, scream, shout, cheer.

Tears burned through your eyelids, blurring your line of vision as you tried to hold yourself together. You shakily let out a sigh. “.... no,” your voice cracks. Another deep sigh, and you felt a tear drip down your cheek. “I’m… I’m tired, Doyoung.” More tears cascade down your cheeks, bringing your sleeves up to wipe them away with each drop. “I’m exhausted, Doyoung. I’m tired.. of all of this. I’m—”

With the phone still pressed against your ear, you sobbed into the night, finally pouring all your boxed-in emotions out to your lover. You cried out your frustrations, your anger, your desolace. Long have your soul been used to routine that you forgot what warmth felt like. To be cared for, watched for, and loved for.

Your sleeves soaked up all your tears, your eyelids certainly swollen from the sudden rush. You take even breaths, calming yourself down from your breakdown. Throughout your cries, never once did Doyoung strayed away from you, ears firmly pressed against his ear. He took in all, every last drop to mitigate the cold shell you’ve developed over time. He said nothing, only offering his presence as a sort of comfort to you for the time being. Once silence took over, all your tears spent, that’s when he spoke up.

“You did well, y/n.”

You breathing hitches for a moment, heart skipping a beat from his words.

“I’m so, so proud of you, y/n. You made it this far into the semester and for that, I’m proud of you.”

And alas, your smile returns. Minuscule it may be, but it’s more than what you could ask for. The feeling of having your shoulders lifted from your burdens made you feel like you could fly again, soar up in the clouds. Your best friend certainly knows how to cheer you up the most.

“Sorry about all of that,” you chuckled.

“Don’t be sorry.”

You shook your head. “No, I am. You literally just heard me have a breakdown and cry with snots all over the place—”

“I don’t give a damn about all of that, y/n.” There’s a slight shuffle on his end. “I love you for you, and that’s never going to change. I will love you at your lowest, and I will love you at your highest. Even when you feel like there’s no hope left in this world, I will bring you back to earth and hold you and remind you that you are hope.”

Just when you thought you had no more tears left in your system, you could feel the waterworks starting again. You bite down on your lower lip, desperately holding it in as love overcomes you.

“You did well, y/n. Only two more finals to go and you’re finally free.”

You wipe away the stray tear that befallen on your cheek. “Thank you, Doyoung. Really.”

“Now go out there and kick some ass for me, alright? Show those professors who’s the boss around here.”

You giggled. With your two fingers on your temple, you did an informal salute. “Yes, sir.”

“That’s my girl.”

Let this be a reminder to you, to all, that there will always be one person that will love you at your lowest, and will always be there to help pick you back up.

i’m afraid that bandaids are no good for heartache not okay, so tell me when your world is falling down

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