#or scar I don’t really know anymore it was probably scar he’s the only guy I draw

[sandwichedbread]

I’ve been stuck with artblock all week and this is the only thing I have been able to draw

edit: i have checked the current day which is something i dont do often and turns out i am a liar it was not a week it was actually three days but thats basically a week i think

[fatuismooches]

I want to see each harbinger with a touchy lover/lover whose love language is physical affection 😭😭

Imagine the Harbingers when your love language is physical affection.

Pierro is learning to adjust. He probably doesn’t have the time or energy for large displays of affection. He’s already very exhausted from his heavy workload and life itself so lots of touching would be a lot for him. But let’s not forget this man is touch-starved. It wouldn’t be an overstatement to say you’re the only thing that brings him happiness in this corrupted world. After the fall of Khaenri’ah, he probably isolated himself from a lot of things in order to focus on furthering the Fatui. So since you are really the link that reminds him that even he has a fraction of humanity left, Pierro does crave your touch. Just differently than how you might show it. He would enjoy simple physical contact for an extended period of time if that makes sense. Like, not anything overbearing, but tiny. You can pull up a chair and nuzzle yourself into his arm and shoulder while he works. It won’t bother him. You can keep your hand on his thigh as you do your own thing. You can try to hold his hand hostage, but it won’t work for very long, though it’ll give him a tiny laugh. Though, once he’s finally out of the office and has free time (which is extremely rare) he won’t say no to lots of cuddles in bed. Truly the only way he can relax. You didn’t hear this from me but he enjoys a damn good massage. Just start rubbing his shoulders in the right places and he’ll be putty in your arms.

Dottore has grown to like it, enjoy it even, and you know what his favorite thing to do is? Initiate it himself first when he sees you approaching so he can catch you off guard and then tease you. Assuming you’ve been with him for centuries since the Akademiya, by now he would have become accustomed to your touch. Sometimes he doesn’t even react when you wrap your arms around his neck (he’s a busy man, you know? He can’t always pay attention to you despite how much you complain in his ear! Though the segments will happily fulfill that role for you.) Touching the scars on his face will always make him stiffen, Zandik will never get used to that even though they don’t hurt anymore. The best time to get touchy with him is when he’s sitting at his desk writing or whatever, since you can easily cuddle him on his lap. Though make sure you’re prepared for it, this is Il Dottore after all. As much as Dottore likes it when you try to challenge him with that intellectual mind of yours, he also loves it when you’re quiet. If you can make sure you stay still for the most part and quiet, his lap and chest are all yours. He might even forget you’re there since he gets so caught up in his work but don’t get surprised when he breaks his pens… and then accidentally touches your clothes with an ink-covered hand. And don’t blame him if you wake up with cramps and sores… it’s well worth it though!

Akademiya Zandik is the embodiment of “what the hell are you doing get away from me.” And literally, everyone knows this, he does have a notorious reputation after all. There was one time another student placed their hand on his shoulder and he physically recoiled and looked as if he just got burnt. Everyone makes sure not to bump into him in the hallways. Pretty much all of the physical contact he’s had was when he was beaten as a child, so he’s grown a hatred and discomfort for it. Zandik even despises brushing hands with the store clerks and merchants. He can’t fathom the fact that touch can be comforting and even healing. He can’t hope to understand the idea that hands are used to love, not only to hurt. So if your love language is physical affection, well… you’re going to have to hold off on your plans for a long time. I know it hurts, but be happy you managed to get into a relationship with this guy first. You persevered a lot, right? You’ll just have to persevere some more. It takes a long time for him to warm up to your touch, much less constant touchiness. And don’t push it. Be patient. The first time you two hold hands is monumental. In due time the two of you will be cuddling together after a long day of performing illegal experiments behind the Akademiya’s back. 

Columbina wholeheartedly enjoys it of course! She is an affectionate queen herself! Bina can easily sense you creeping up behind her to trap her in a hug, and she happily lets it happen. She will really just let you do what you want, and she loves how you two have the same love languages since it’s a win for everyone (minus the Harbingers, Pierro has to tell her to focus during the meetings and missions instead of clinging onto you.) It is funny to think that you two actually have schedules - first, you’re holding and pampering her, and then she holds and pampers you… yes, a very beneficial relationship, and no one is left out of the affection and love. If you want to hold hands for every activity, go ahead! Honestly, you two could glue your hands together and daily life wouldn’t be affected too much since that’s how it already is like… how cute. Though I hope you have good shoulder strength because Columbina will literally drop half her body over you for an extended period of time. Cuddles of course are heavenly, though more often than not, you two end up in a tangle of limbs and have fallen off the bed with the blankets, trying to separate. Oh and if you’re touching her wings? Make sure to be very gentle this time! (Otherwise, she may playfully bat you with them but accidentally put too much force into it and send you a good few feet away.)

Capitano is very confused at first but will go along with it happily. The tall and romantically awkward man doesn’t understand why you’re always insisting on holding or touching hands, but when you look so happy and smile so brightly, he could never refuse you. He doesn’t understand when you plop yourself on his lap out of nowhere, or when you cuddle into his chest, but he doesn’t dare move a muscle. He’s not even sure what a “love language” is in the first place until you mentioned it offhandedly once, and then the next day he’s reading a very detailed book about it in his private office. Capitano’s face is completely neutral but inside he’s secretly very touched and honored by your love language. Like, he knew you liked him, but this just solidifies how much you truly loved him. For some reason, he treats this as revolutionary news even though you two are married. Sometimes it doesn’t process that someone as lovely and amazing as you can love a monster like him. After acknowledging how much physical affection means to you he will open himself to you whenever he’s not busy. He will make sure you’re comfortable and cozy, because if you get cramps, or get too cold, or too hot, or whatever possible discomfort, he won’t forgive himself. Is he taking tips from the couple's advice book? Yes. Touch him all you want, he won’t be able to reciprocate very well other than a pat on the head and back or two but don’t worry, he’s learning.

Scaramouche will act like it’s the worst thing that’s ever been bestowed upon him… initially. Human touch is something that has a long, not-so-good history with him considering all his betrayals. Just the mere thought of it sickens him sometimes, he doesn’t think he could ever get used to it again. Though, the puppet has gone through many stages, many changes in his life, you being one of the major ones. A big change usually is accompanied by many small ripples in one’s life, and that is exactly what you do for him. If you’ve managed to make it to this point, a relationship with him, you two have probably touched a few times. But only a few. It is not something he’s accustomed to. So you will have to rein in your need to have your hands all over him and your desire for tons of smooches. Taking it slow with physical affection is key, but you will be rewarded. Scaramouche will slowly begin to tolerate your affection, behind closed doors, however. The only affection that happens in public is when he’s jealous and pulls you into his arms. Toleration turns to him internally begging for more, however, he will never voice that out loud. The Harbinger longs to feel you hold him from behind, as he mumbles curses and how you were so needy under his breath. He hopes that you’ll take matters into your own hands and kiss his cheeks so he doesn’t have to ask. He wishes for you to caress his chest, the place where his heart is vacant. In your arms, maybe it’s okay for Kunikuzushi to be the vulnerable and emotional puppet he wishes he wasn’t… But don’t get too cocky. He will still dodge your attempts at hugs and watch as you comedically trip over your own feet, and then walk away and softly smile at your whining and pouting behind his back.  

Wanderer already knows how this goes. After all, you have forgotten him, but he could never forget you. He has every part of you etched into his eternal memories, your touchy habits, your kisses, your hugs, how you always try to sneak some hand-holding in to see if he wouldn’t notice. And of course, some things never change. After you two have gotten together again, you still do the exact same affectionate touches as before, as if nothing has changed at all. But he has changed. He is no longer Scaramouche, or Kabukimono, or whatever names he had called himself before. Wanderer seldom complains or makes multiple comments about your affection, nor will he be begging for it frequently. Instead, he has a more neutral-positive take on your affection. When you need him and his touch, he will be there silently. And so he will let you drunkenly mumble into his shoulder and cling to him in the tavern, not caring if that Scribe and the other blonde boy are looking at him. He’ll let you give him a peck on the cheek as thanks for helping you shop even if the mercenary and village leader are chuckling at the sight. He’ll let you greet him with a great big hug even if Sumeru’s Archon smiles knowingly at the sight. Wanderer will let you indulge, for he thinks that you deserve at least that for everything he’s put you through.

Kabukimono is admittedly confused at first, but in no way declines your advances. Your touch makes him feel quite happy after all. But, is it normal for one to be so touchy with their partner? He has seen other couples display such affection, but you seem to provide it far more than the average person! Whether it’s just a mere brush of fingers stroking him or a hand on his thigh, you always seem to be touching him affectionately. The puppet wonders if there is any real meaning behind these lingering touches that he does not understand yet. Surely there must be, right? He knows that some humans have odd habits, as you would put it. But nope - it is simply “how you show love,” your words echoing throughout his mind. How you show love is through your soft and gentle touches, your rough tackling when you’re feeling devious, the playful pulling of his cheeks, and always finding an excuse to kiss him. And he can’t say that he dislikes it! Though, it leaves Kabukimono to wonder - how does he show love?

Sandrone has no clue what to do or make of the situation. Physical affection is something that she is really not familiar with, even if the relationship has been going on for a long time. And someone who is huge on it? Oh boy, you’re going to kill her. I bet once, her face probably got stained with grease or something since she works with machines a lot, and you moved to wipe it off and her face just turned completely blank and still. Just completely unmoving, her hands literally frozen in the position they were in as your fingers tenderly brushed against her cheek. You may or may not have broken Sandrone because for the first time in your life, you heard her stutter, and then she avoided you for the next few days. So, not good at all really, but then again not in a bad way. She won’t get mad at you exactly, but she will not respond or reciprocate because she genuinely doesn’t know how. It is a super strange feeling to her, liking someone else’s touch. Do try not to do it while she’s working, because she will get distracted and then mess up on her project, and then proceed to lose it and then go turn some poor souls into dolls to let off steam from how ill you make her feel. Will she ever get used to it or get better at reciprocating? Well, I’m sure you’ll be staying with her for a while, so you’ll find out down the line.

La Signora enjoys it to a normal extent. There are times when she will be possessive and demand that you shower her with complete and utter adoration which you happily agree to. Though there are times when she will have to decline your offer - she knows you are a needy lover, Signora teases, but she too has work to do. And how will she focus on her duties if you are constantly luring her attention to you instead of where it needs to be? Signora promises to give you what you want later. Though, you will be touching Rosalyne a lot more than you think. Why? Because you help her with her own routine. You will help her do or undo her hair, which means rubbing her scalp gently and combing her hair. (Be careful! She will get annoyed if you pull on it too hard.) You love doing her nails for her, because that means you get to hold her hand for a long time. Please, brush your fingers softly against her face as you adjust the black mask on her face. Please, trace along her collarbones as you put on the black neckpiece that runs down to her chest. Signora doesn’t particularly think much of your super affectionate nature, she just knows it’s a part of you and will even use it to her advantage. You give really good massages, she’s noticed.

Pantalone feels his smile grow every time you unabashedly touch him, because he too will be physically affectionate with no shame. I don’t think you’ll win against this man because he’s just that good. You’re kissing him? Well, now he’s got you trapped in his arms littering kisses all over your body. You’re hugging or holding his hand? Well, now you’re being held hostage by him because he’s not letting go for anything. Every single time you’re touchy with him he will turn it around on you and be the one caressing you instead. All with a damned teasing smile as if this doesn’t fluster him the tiniest bit. Pantalone is the kind of guy to have his hand on your thigh under the table at every chance he gets. He will have an arm linked around yours at every social gathering or party there is. He will have you on his lap while doing anything possible - in his office doing paperwork, reading a book, even merely having a regular conversation. I don’t know, he’ll tell you about Snezhnaya’s economy if you want. You get my point. So, in conclusion, he is really one of the best to have your hands all over, so long as you’re prepared to receive what you give.

Arlecchino doesn’t really know what to do… she didn’t even know it was possible for someone to be so touchy-feely. You cling to her more than the children do! She’s rather indifferent to it, she won’t reject it, but she won’t exactly encourage it either. She is a woman who likes her personal space, after all. Though at times she does enjoy your kisses and hugs, sometimes she just needs to be by herself, and your constant affection can be distracting… Though, Arlie does like it in moderate amounts. For example, coming home after long days to be pampered and kissed all over by you. As much as she looks unsettlingly composed and unaffected, even she feels the weight of her responsibilities sometimes. When you two finally have the time to cuddle she won’t be irritated at how you won’t let go, and will stroke your hair as you’re buried in her chest. All Arlecchino asks is that you don’t do it in public, because even the orphans are beginning to whisper about how “Father is oh so lovey-dovey and mushy-gushy with [Name]” and she really can’t deal with that right now. 

Childe is a cuddle bear himself, so expect to be evenly matched and also appreciated for your love language. Although Childe doesn’t really show it or acknowledge it himself, he is probably a bit touch-starved. That’s what falling into the Abyss and joining the Fatui as a kid does to you. So if you want to try and squeeze him to death affectionately, go ahead! He will be accepting the challenge and doing the same to you. If you have the need to always be holding his hand or gripping a piece of his clothing, he will let you. Even if you’re in the streets of Liyue, onlookers passing by, or in the privacy of your own home while he’s cooking (he will literally cook with one hand, don’t test him.) If you have the sudden urge to kiss him silly out of nowhere, by all means, he welcomes it. And he will reciprocate it ten times harder. He finds it rather adorable, to be honest. I’m sorry but he definitely tickles you as revenge if you glomp him too hard or something. It’s all in good fun though! Ajax is not one to waste your affectionate habits, whatever little time he has with you will be spent wholeheartedly loving you to the fullest.

[norman-fucking-reedus]

Okaay we’ve talked about Daryl with his daughter but lets talk about your pregnancy for a second..

I can imagine Daryl coming back late in the night, so tired and sore from a long day of work. You had only found out a few hours prior, and seeing the physical ache in his body you knew he could use some hopefully very good news.

“Hi there hunterman” You whispered, sliding his crossbow off his shoulders as he kicked his muddy boots off.

Daryl dropped his head down onto your shoulder, sighing heavily. “Hi”

A moment a silence passed, you simply combing your fingers through Daryl’s hair before gently guiding him to raise his head, eyes meeting yours.

“I have something to tell you” Daryl raised a brow, hands settling st your waist. “Not dyin’ are ya?” You giggled, shaking your head

Reaching for your back pocket, you pulled the test out and handed it to him, watching as he took it between his fingers with a confused gaze, which quickly turned into excitement.

“No way”

“Yes way. We’re gonna have a little Dixon”

Daryl wrapped his arms tightly around you, smile resting on his face until it slowly disappear, a set of tears following suit. He sniffled softly, and you raised your hands up to wipe his falling tears. “It’s okay, big guy.”

“Wha’ if m’not a good dad?” He whispered, and you rolled your eyes at him. “I wouldn’t have picked you if I didn’t think you’d be a perfect dad” You wrapped your arms around his neck, kissing him passionately as his arm circled your waist, a hand sliding up your shirt and caressing the skin.

When you start to go through hormone changes and start forming a bump, Daryl becomes super protective of you. Much so to the point that it annoys you but he doesn’t care, he’ll literally die before someone lays a finger on his woman.

He strictly forbids you from leaving the walls, telling everyone on watch duty to not let you out no matter how much you yell, which in fact, yelled at them a lot. He also refused to let you carry anything that looked just a hair too heavy.

“Nope. Nah. Give ‘ere girl.”

“I can carry it, Dixon”

“I’on care, give it ta me”

He’ll forcibly take the item out your hand, because simply how dare you have to even lift a finger with that baby inside you.

I also honestly feel like Daryl would be really scared to have sex during your pregnancy. Now if its pleasure that you want, Daryl has no probably eating you out till your eyes are rolling and his jaw is cramping.

“I dun’ wanna hurt tha baby”

“Hurt them how?”

“..With m’dick??”

I think about the scene from Big Mouth when Jay fucks his pillow and screams “My dick is right next to the baby’s head” That’s all i’m gonna say about that

Daryl makes sure to give you half of his food, and you don’t have a choice but to take it. (Unless the baby says otherwise) He purposely hunts extra food for that you can have more to eat, especially the further you get along.

By the time you’re about seven months and very undoubtedly pregnant, Daryl would murder anyone in cold blood if they even looked at you wrong.

Although you were crabby and yelled a lot, he was at your complete beck and call. Daryl could only loving stare at you when you complained over something, thinking about how gorgeous you were and how lucky he was that you were the mother of his child.

“Nothing fits right anymore! My shoes don’t even fit”

“Ya don’ need yer shoes if ya never leave”

“I never leave ‘cause you keep me locked here like a fucking prisoner”

“M’keepin my pretty girls safe”

Lots of his clothes have been sacrificed considering you’re literally busting out of yours, and something predatory washes over him seeing your belly prutrude through his shirts.

Birth is definitely hard and Daryl definitely passed out once or twice, but being the man he is he forced himself to pull through for you, and the scars from your nails dragging down his flesh will be a fond memory followed by the sweet sound of loud crying.

You know how much Daryl loves kids, and you’re exhausted from all the pushing, so it only makes sense that he gets first hold. You watch with a small smile as Siddiq guides Daryl to take his shirt off, watching the burly man nervously but eagerly (and carefully) take his newborn into his large hands.

In that moment, cradling his very own precious babygirl, it felt like you were the only three people on earth. Daryl couldn’t take his eyes off the wiggling bundle of life in his arms, rocking slowly in the chair as he burned the image of her tiny little face into his mind.

As you stared at him, you couldn’t help but think about how you really did pick the perfect dad. Daryl Dixon, a hard, strong, intimidating man fear by many, who was now sitting softly, gently and quietly with his daughter laying ontop his bare chest, a large hand keeping her secured. Already a major daddys girl.

The baby stage is easily Daryl’s favorite, and he definitely gets up in the middle of the night when she starts crying or fussing.

I don’t think he’d put her down for a second, like you just won’t see Daryl without her hooked around his arm. He doesn’t bring her into the garage during bike repairs until shes older, not wanting to let his baby inhale toxic bike fumes.

Dog is her protector. Most dogs understand what babies are and how vulnerable to the world they are, so Daryl definitely trains Dog to stay by her side when he can’t be. Instead of sleeping on the couch Dog now sleeps right outside her crib.

On the one occasion when a group a raiders had started searching houses, yours having been one of the first, one of the men made the mistake of opening her door, Dog jumping swiftly into protective mode and clamping his canines into the mans leg.

When it comes to breastfeeding, I can imagine the extra lengths Daryl would go. He makes sure you have enough food and nutrients to produce, and totally massages your boobs when you complain about the soreness.

When she’s big enough to start wearing clothes rather than onesies, Daryl definitely finds lots of super cute girly stuff for her because well only the best for his girls. He spoils her totally rotten.

Maybe not completely, but y’know. Her first words end up being an adorably butchered version of Daryl’s name, one that makes him wanna cry and scream cause his daughters first words were his own name.

“Baryl!”

“Ohh good jobs mommas baby! That’s daddys name!”

“She- said- she said- she just- she”

“It’s okay, Baryl we all heard it”

｡･:*:･ﾟ★｡･:*:･ﾟ☆ ｡･:*:･ﾟ★

[nvvacanesworld]

gojo x reader 𓆩ᥫ᭡𓆪

Satoru x Reader !

Part 2 link here

tw-angst, hurt/no comfort, breakup, arguing, crying , swearing, GOJO IS MEAN :((( use of baby (as pet name) no curses,sorry if i missed anything let me know.

GOJO MASTER LIST!

Hot, Sweaty, and just uncomfortable. That’s how you would describe your situation right now being Sugurus house warming party.

The only reason you knew him and even were in this unfortunate position was because he was bestfriends with your boyfriend.

The famous Gojo Satoru. Women loved him, Men wanted to be him, and You? Couldn’t even fucking find him. Sitting in the kitchen on a barstool taking baby sips of your drink is where you found yourself after he left you when you guys walked in when Geto spotted him and called him over. Leaving you to fend for yourself

Things with you guys have been rocky for a while now. You didn’t know why ether. It was just like he stopped being your sweet boyfriend who courted you and just became some jackass you couldn’t even recognize.

Caught up in your own mind you didn’t notice the guy next to you trying to get your attention. Turning your head you your eyes catch one’s that look tired looking at you.

“I’m sorry did you say something?” you said to him. Letting your eyes wander you really take in his features. A big muscular frame with tussled black hair, green eyes that could make any man cower in fear, and a smirk on his face adorned by a scar on his lips

“Yea, s’just never seen you before do you know the host?”

Hesitant with your answer you finally replied “Sorta, his bestfriend is my boyfriend so i tagged along” pausing “i don’t know where he went though” casting your state downwards in shame. It really was pathetic, being here alone while he was out probably having so much fun.

They say speak of the devil and he shall appear. Just in that moment gojo waltzed into the kitchen like he owned it along with geto and some other douchebags you didn’t care to know. Walking right passed you too. You felt so small and invisible.

Turning around he finally noticed you sitting there.

“Oh shit hey baby where have you been? I haven’t seen you since we walked in i would’ve thought you went home” He said causing him and his friends to chuckle

Meeting his eyes “I’ve been here the whole time i couldn’t find you and this place is so big so…” you said sheepishly. “and you weren’t answering your text ether satoru” god you felt so pathetic having to say that to your own boyfriend. Like you were some hoe begging for his attention. I mean who has to remind there own boyfriend to check their fucking phone. You started to get upset.

“Damn” He said starching his next “My fault” .The chatter and laughter that once filled the room died down now leaving an awkward silence.

Getting tired of being here you got up from your seat. “Can we go home i don’t feel well” you said tugging at his sleeves.

You didn’t miss how he face fell to a look of disappointment and you would’ve felt bad if you weren’t in this situation but you didn’t care. You had been here for three hours and you just wanted to go to sleep.

Flashing a look at Geto it seemed he gave in. “I’ll catch you guys later”

——————————————���————————————————

the door slammed as you walked into you and gojo’s shared home, Or should you called it a house ? because home is where the heart is and there was no love in this shared space.

There used to be back when you moved in a year ago. You thought to yourself while walking to through the halls that led to the kitchen.

There you saw gojo sitting at the counter looking through some mail from this morning.

Your back turned to him going to the fridge you didn’t say anything to eachother. You didn’t want to speak to him right now. Not after he basically just forgot about you. It’s like he didn’t even want you there. It’s like he didn’t want you anywhere anymore. the tension in the air was thick until-

“Why were you acting like that back there?” not even looking up from the mail as he did it.

“What?” You were confused. If anything you should be asking him that question. Turning around to look at him you started at him going through the mail

“In the kitchen y/n, don’t play dumb. You were such a buzzkill” Finally relieving his issue with you.

For a while you just stared at him. You couldn’t believe he had a problem with you of all people. And for what?

“It’s like you were calling me out trying to paint me as a bad boyfriend”

“Because i said you weren’t answering your text?”

“You didn’t have to mention that. It’s like the whole room went silent after you did. You made everyone uncomfortable”

You couldn’t believe your ears. What the fuck was his problem

“maybe i wouldn’t have had to mention that if you answered your text Satoru, or i’ll do you one better, looked for me after you ditched me at the fucking door” your voice started to get louder. Just who did he think he was?

Groaning at what you said Satoru ran a hand down his face. Finally meeting your eyes.

“God y/n please don’t start. i cant enjoy myself now without you? huh? is that it? I don’t have to be glued to your hip 25/8”

 “Do you even realize what you did ? You left me alone Satoru! Alone, I don’t know everyone like you do.” Pausing tearing up you felt your voice start to crack “And it’s like you have been doing emotionally for ages, When’s the last time you did the thing you used to do? Like talking to me about my interests or even talking to me at all? It’s like you get home from work don’t even eat with me and go to sleep and do it all over again…do you even care about this fucking relationship?”

“Oh please don’t make this about you, i work and provide for us y/n, i can’t have time for you like i used to this new job doesn’t allow that” Dropping his mail and standing up “I wanted today to just be a day where i could finally get that stress from my job off my shoulders but here you are ‘bitchin, we’re you always so needy?”

Needy? Bitching? That’s how he sees me? You could basically feel your heart breaking at his harsh words.

“I’m not needy Satoru…i just need you to see me it’s like you don’t even care about us anymore” Tears were spilling down your flushed cheeks as you confessed what you’ve been feeling for what seems like eternity.

“You’re crying? y/n you’re being dramatic i’ve been busy with work of course i care about us how could you even say that?”

“I can say that because that’s how it feels being with you now, it’s like you don’t even care it’s like you’re a whole different person” Getting angrier you felt the need to vent out your frustrations. It was now or never. “The old Satoru would’ve never let us not talk, the old Satoru would’ve never called me needy or called me talking out my feelings “bitchin”, the old Satoru wouldn’t have left me in a kitchen alone for three hours while he did god knows what while ignoring his girlfriend” You yelled at him practically out of breathe by the time you were done.

But by the looks of it as you went in Satoru was getting sick of it. Slamming his hand on the island he spoke “God women what is your problem?” He seethed “ The old Satoru isn’t here anymore how about that”

Taken aback by his outburst you went to speak up but he beat you to it

“You know if i knew you were ‘gonna be this annoying i would’ve took Utahime up on her offer” He chuckled to no one in particular

You felt your blood run cold and your heart drop. What is he talking about ?

“What offer Satoru?” you croaked out

“You wouldn’t want to know”

You were done. You couldn’t live like this anymore you didn’t deserve to live like this anymore. When have you felt so weak?

“Then maybe you’re better off with her” You spat. Grabbing your coat you headed for the door.

He didn’t try to stop you. You don’t know why but that hurt more than anything that was or could’ve been said. Maybe because it told that it was really over.

But it also made you happy

Because it opened your eyes that there was no reason to stay.

AN: OKAYYYY SO that was my first time writing something i’m so sorry if it was bad. I feel like i was missing something maybe i should’ve been more descriptive.?? uhh idk let me know what you think REBLOGS AND FOLLOWS AND LIKE AND COMMENTS ARE APPRECIATED AND FEEL FREE TO LEAVE REQUESTS PLEASE !!!!! I NEED IDEAS ON WHAT TO WRITE NEXT :)

[hugsandchaos]

FELLOW PHANS, OH MY GOSH

Okay! Listen! Listen, okay?!

So reveal gone wrong, something happens, Danny ends up in an alternate universe where he never existed and Dash was good friends with his family since Jazz tutors him, messed around with some of their stuff, and became a Halfa. They were there, along with Kwan, so they know. And they’re helping him. Sure, this would be a good chance to study ghosts, but Dash’s health, physical and mental, comes first.

Danny’s been a Halfa for over a year at this point, so he’s experienced. Dash isn’t. He’s only been a halfa for a little over a month. He’s the one fighting off ghosts, until Danny comes along and handles it. Dash thought it was awesome and tried talking to him, but he just left.

And in school, Danny meets Sam and Tucker all over again. He also avoids Dash, which is kind of a bummer because this Dash is actually a great guy! He wants to welcome the new kid, too. He looks pretty freaked out, probably new to the town and could use some encouragement, but he keeps flinching and avoiding him.

Danny understands that this is an alternative universe. Clockwork knows him. But everything is just so weird. Dash is good, a halfa, and his parents aren’t hunting him? They’re helping him?? It’s so baffling to him, and it really hurts a part of him. Why couldn’t his own parents have been like that?

Also, Lancer worries for Danny because he’s always nervous about something and was practically falling asleep standing up when he transferred. Despite there being forms signed, he also can’t find any trace of his parents and Danny tenses up when he mentions them. He also gets really anxious when the Fentons are around or mention anything to do with ghost hunting.

The kid had a panic attack when there was a lightning storm and Lancer could’ve sworn he saw litchenberg scars on the back of his neck! He refuses school counseling because he “doesn’t trust therapists anymore”!

As you can imagine, Lancer’s questions are putting Danny under a lot of stress. More than necessary, yes, but he has no idea what’ll happen if his teacher finds out he’s on his own? How will they react to him living in an abandoned observatory just outside of town? Is he going to be forced somewhere else?

Bonus bits!

Dash has a fire core, as to be expected, but he doesn’t have ghost sense like Danny. Or he does? I’m still deciding.

We don’t see Vlad having any ghost sense, only Danny and Dan, and Frostbite said that his ghost sense was part of his ice powers.

On the other hand, we could say Dash suddenly feels uncomfortably hot when another ghost is nearby maybe?

He hasn’t unlocked his fire powers yet, but he’ll get there! He admires this new ghost who’s been helping him out, and actually handles the fights much better and quicker than him, and he wants to learn from him so badly.

Somehow, he hasn’t put two and two together yet, but Danny has.

Danny is scared of the Fentons. No one knows why. He just looks really put off by them and tries to leave as quickly as possible without being mean. He backs up when they approach and he stares at any new ghost hunting tech is in their hands.

Haven’t figured out Dash’s obsession yet. Maybe dogs? Or anything cartoonish? Again, still figuring it out.

Some of this might be subject to change, please remember that incase I make another post changing my mind about something. That’s all for now. Bye! 👋

[venuscrashed]

demon brothers x gn!ghosthunter!reader

i just started the game so please don’t come at me/ let me know if you guys want more of this au

warnings: based off phasmophobia, no pronouns used

Word count: about 600 in total

More Headcannons

Okay, now imagine the demon brothers with a ghost hunter reader. Who also happens to hunt demons, like in phasmophobia. They wouldn’t know your job at first but once you tell them you can only imagine their reactions.

Lucifer: He would obviously know your job from the start. Although, he was still a bit hesitant to accept you. He was cautious around you, always keeping a close eye on you. Whenever you would grab something he would stiffen but it wasn’t obvious. Later on he would be fine, even joke about it. “MC, is there any chance that you can do your ghost hunting thing on my brothers.” “If you don’t calm down I’ll have MC start an exorcism.” 

Mammon: Was literally like whaaat? Thinks it’s really cool, honestly. “Yeah! That's my human kicking ghost's butt.” Would somehow turn it into a money scheme. He would also cling onto you in haunted houses and such. “The Great Mammon ain’t scared. He’s protecting you because you’re not used to ghosts anymore.” Would totally tag along if you were to do some ghost haunting in Diavolo’s castle. “MC how do you use the glow stick?” “AHHHGHGHH it talked to me!” “Mammon it's a spirit box, it’s supposed to do that.”

Levi: If you stream it he would totally watch it. Would see you when you arrive and be like “OMD you’re that streamer that does ghost hunting!” Instantly becomes your number one fan. Would think you’re really brave considering he can’t talk to regular people. He hides and blushes whenever he sees you be brave…or see you in general. Plays phasmophobia with you, and is really good. He would be an expert at ghost chases and looping. One second into the house “It’s a Yurei. Let’s gag and go.” Becomes more of a professional then you.

Satan: When he first met you he felt some sort of nostalgia, like you two have crossed paths before. It isn’t until he sees your scar or necklace that his cult wears. It’s inevitable that you would come across satanic worshippers and be sacrificed, or be one. Asks you questions and even gives you tips. Gives you full permission to summon him if his cult members mess with you again. Would tag along on your ghost hunters and probably remember all of their traits. “It’s an Oni. The airball event tells me enough.”

Asmo: Again if you stream he would totally watch. Would totally brag about your guys' friendships. Would even post a pic of you two and caption it “Demon x Demon hunter: the best couple” if you two were dating. Would only tag along to act scared and hide behind you just so you can protect him and be brave. “Oh~ MC. It’s scary in here, the ghost keeps scaring me.” “Asmo you're literally a demon.”

Beel: Is like “oh.” He understands why you hunt ghosts but doesn’t really see the point. Would be like “I can protect you.” Would totally watch your streams while he eats, especially if they’re hours long. If he tags along he stays close to you so he can protect you. Would totally be the man in the van. He’s sitting there eating while watching the camera for dots. I feel like he would be good at motion sensors and para mic. Has good intuition to, “It’s the twins.” “Beel we haven't even been here for a minute.” “It reminds me of Belphie and me.”

Belphie: Would hate you more than he originally did. “Did Lucifer choose you to spite me?” Would complain about you for so long “But they’re dangerous.” Once he warms up to you he’ll joke about it. “Can you get rid of Lucifer with your demon experience.” IF he tagged along he would sleep in the van next to Beel. Maybe I would bring you the supplies but nothing past that. Don’t tell him you know but he plays your stream in the background to sleep. If he stays awake he is fully immersed into it and even laughs when you get scared.

[astronomodome]

It’s 3 AM and I’m stressed out so instead of doing boring things like sleeping I’m deciding whether or not I could beat each life series member in a physical fight (c! and cc!). Sorry about the violence idk why my brain thought of this. DISCLAIMER I don’t want to fight any of these people and I don’t wish any harm upon them I’m just delirious 👍 yayy

Rendog

c!: He’s just a guy with dog ears in canon so I wouldn’t be like suuuper fucked but I think I’d still lose. You know he turns up to jazzercise

cc!: Hasn’t he been through enough recently… could I win? Maybe. But I’d be a good sport about it and I’d expect him to do the same should he beat me

Grian

c!: Have you ever tried to fight a bird? Those things are scary. I got chased by a goose once and it was not fun. Yeah this ain’t happening

cc!: You know that one video of Grian demolishing that punching bag? That would be me. Do you want that for me? I don’t

Joel Smallishbeans

c!: I think I could but it would be really close and I’d have to go to the hospital immediately after. Not for fight wounds or anything I just would be worried he’d have given me rabies

cc!: I feel like I would have to fight him and Lizzie at the same time and I don’t think I could take that. Nothing can beat the power of love <3

Scott Smajor

c!: Nah I just lose and he’s judgmental about it too

cc!: LGBT infighting. I would probably lose

BigB

c!: he would win the psychic battle long before the physical battle could even begin

cc!: Man is yoked. I have died

Etho

c!: As soon as I walk up to him he teleports behind me and cuts me in half. Nothing personnel kid

cc!: Lost in the Canadian wilderness trying to track him down, I am mauled by a moose. My corpse becomes a nice meal for some wolves and I am slowly forgotten

Bdubs

c!: I could punt him with ease

cc!: I maybe could but would it really be worth it

Pearl

c!: Ripped apart by hounds so sad. I deserved it

cc!: I can’t afford to fly to Australia. Also even if I could I think she could just throw a bug at me and I would die from the 10,000 poisons that every Australian animal contains

Martyn Inthelittlewood

c!: I lied we’re not fighting I’m leading you out of the endless cycle of violence come with me

cc!: I feel like I would be overconfident going into it and then he would just deck me. Alternatively he could just recite mentally damaging lore facts at me until I fall over and die

Scar from Goodtimes

c!: He immediately engages me in a battle of wits that ends in me paying him to punch me in the face

cc!: I would concede immediately for moral reasons. Maybe we could lightsaber duel instead?

Impulse

c!: He would show up in like full netherite or something. Are these fights happening irl or in minecraft. Doesn’t matter. Either way I am gone. Reduced to ashes

cc!: That is a whole entire human being I think I’d punch him once and then apologize. It would not affect him at all. I don’t think he’d hurt me though

Tango

c!: I might have a chance but the fire hair thing might be a problem

cc!: I think it would somehow turn into a hockey match and given that I have only ice skated twice before and both times ended in me spraining my ankles real bad I don’t think my odds are looking great. He is bald though so there’s always hope

Cleo

c!: I am breakfast. She will eat me

cc!: I don’t think I’d even be able to get the fight set up I think they’d give me a fake address and leave it at that. And I would deserve it

Jimmy Solidarity

c!: We’re both rather pathetic and sad so I think in this case we would just adhere to rule of funny. Whether I win or lose depends on what’s funniest at the time

cc!: The GYM TEACHER?? No.

Skizzleman

c!: Why would I do that

cc!: :( I don’t want to do this anymore. I would lose also that is a whole ass adult man but I think he’d go easy on me so idk

Geminitay

c!: Lol. No.

cc!: I would be beaten instantly cause I’d feel bad about hurting her but honestly I don’t know why this would ever happen. We could be friends <3 sorry is that parasocial

Mumbo Jumbo

c!: I feel like he could outrun me but I could overpower him

cc!: Absolutely no chance, man could bike circles around me. I would be easily run over

Lizzie LDShadowlady

c!: Easily but I’d feel bad about it

cc!: Same as with Joel. I stand no chance against their combo attack

[tryingtofindava]

𝐃𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐉𝐞𝐟𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐊𝐢𝐥𝐥𝐞𝐫 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐜𝐚𝐧𝐨𝐧𝐬*ೃ༄

THE UNREALISTIC VERSION FOR THE DELUSIONAL GIRLYS

: ̗̀➛Back to source

Most definitely broke into your apartment with full hostile intentions of ‘putting you to sleep.’

Lmao

That didn’t happen.

When he broke in, you were so chill about it. Like- most people would be screaming n’ crying right about now.

He almost got convinced that it was a normal thing for you, murderers breaking into your apartment.

You sprayed Febreze in his eyes and he left.

Anywho, he can’t explain the exact reason why he’s became so interested in you.

You were just different.

But like, not in the ‘IM SO DIFFERENT’ way.

But don’t be too glad he let you live.

Bcs I swear this mf be following you about. Picking apart your entire being to see if you’re worth sparing. Which you were!!

You two most definitely started out with just being friends, he’s living with you rent free basically.

You fell first, he fell harder sorta thing going on.

When you two actually started dating. He was obsessed with you. Literally.

You gave him a key to your apartment so he didn’t have to use the window anymore.

That didn’t stop him. He still just uses your bedroom window.

Don’t question him about it though, he’s odd.

Won’t ever admit it, but he LOVES when you play with his hair.

Speaking of hair, if you have a pony tail in. He will 100% pull on it. GENTLY OFC!! He only tugs your hair hard when you’re sucking his-

Anywho.

He also likes scaring you out of nowhere. So be careful when you think you’re alone, you’re probably not.

He makes it very, very clear that you’re his. Tbh he thinks he has some sorta ownership over you.

His mouth scars are like, so, so infected. Every time they start to heal again he recuts them. So the chances are he probably leaves you to clean them.

This edge lord is a ass guy.

Like he slaps your ass randomly and if you even show any signs of annoyance, it makes him feel like he’s accomplished smth.

He’s got a god complex, make what you want with that information.

If he catches you staring OMD HE’LL GET SO COCKY.

“Like what you see, doll?”

You’ll never hear the end of it.

He’s not a big fan and of going out during the day he’s a nighttime type of dude, or in overly crowded or noisy places since he’s easily irritated, so dates aren’t really on the table for him.

And he’s not very normal looking… at least he’s hot.

But he’ll get you stuff! (he probably stole it.)

But it’s the thought that counts…!

He likes listening to your heartbeat. He likes knowing you are alive. (Again, don’t ask he’s odd.)

Mf loves winding you up, teasing you, random light touches. Anything to get you going really.

But he’ll get so pissy if you do the same thing to him.

His skin is CRUSTY. teach him about the wonders of moisturiser. I beg you.

He will randomly get very emotional, comfort him. Or try to if he lets you get close to him.

One time you woke up to him just staring at you. That was pretty fucking creepy.

But not surprising.

I mean, this dude literally stalks you n’ shit. To make sure you’re okay :)

You give him the affection and validation he craves. He’ll do anything to make sure that you’re alright.

He can’t lose you.

Not yet.

He’s still a serial killer, so he probably ups and leaves for a few days and when he comes back he won’t tell you shit. (Even though it’s really painfully obvious what he’s been up to.)

The relationship is probably a bitty toxic. He’s probably gaslit you AT LEAST once or twice.

He’s an obsessive sadist.

When he wants something, he’s gonna get it.

The relationship is about him. Him and his needs.

He still loves you dearly. But not like the normal person. He has his… own ways of showing his love.

If you could even call it that.

But he’s not below killing you if he has to.

✯.★*°•.°✯•.★*°°·.•°★•✯.★*°•.°✯•.★*°°·.•°★•

[frozenjokes]

Another Much Needed Follow Up About Love and Aromanticism, Where It’s Time We Cleared Things Up. Oh, And Mumbo Is Here Too.

this fic can be read on its own as a one shot, but I would recommend reading this first, as the context provides a little more insight on why the characters are reacting the way they do to each other

Over the course of a couple weeks very little changed. Mumbo spent the majority of his time planted in one place, anchored somewhat in the shallows so he could lift his head and listen to what the humans were doing on the days they came around. As much as it pained Mumbo to be so still so much of the time, it was a necessary evil if he ever wanted to heal, and he very much did. It didn’t matter how little he moved his tail at this point, anything he did would only result in his condition worsening.

If it wasn’t for Scar, he would have left a while ago. The humans didn’t come every day anymore, but they came often enough, and they certainly noticed Mumbo’s lack of activity. Grian tended towards keeping his distance, which didn’t bother Mumbo at all, but Scar really went out of his way to be there; sitting close (a gesture Mumbo was beginning to mind less), bringing him human trinkets to look at and play with (always exciting), but most importantly Scar brought food, and a lot of it at that; Mumbo wouldn’t have been able to stay without it. He often wondered where Scar got the many bags of fish he brought; it wasn’t all very fresh, so it was probably supplied from a human stockpile, but regardless, Mumbo was grateful. He wasn’t often in the best of moods and didn’t speak very much despite the fact he was sure Scar would have been ecstatic to talk with him, but he hoped regardless that Scar knew how deeply grateful he was.

Today, Scar and Grian were sitting on the shore together, shoulder to shoulder as they bent over one of their human activities. The first time Mumbo saw them drawing together, he had asked to see (saying ‘What’ over and over again seemed to have gained several different meanings over the weeks), but Scar had showed him that the paper they wrote on got ruined in the water, ripping easily, so it wasn’t something Mumbo could learn about personally. That was okay though, he was content to watch.

“Okay,” Scar began tapping the writing utensil (‘pencil’) to his lips, “Do we have anything to revise about the list this week? I don’t think very much new has happened.”

“Read it again, will you?”

“It’s right here in front of your face, do I really have to?”

“We’ve been over this Scar, I’m conditionally illiterate. Like right now, you got me up early and I’m tired and the words are so far away and I don’t want to. Also your handwriting is atrocious.”

“I’m tired too! It’s not my fault my fish guy needed me to show up at 6 AM.”

“You have a car, Scar. And a license.”

“Oh hey! Look at this cool list!” Scar directed Grian’s attention back to the paper, Grian only rolling his eyes before letting Scar continue. “Well, I won’t go into detail on my notes about what he eats because that’ll just bore you, but to put it simply, basically everything that’s got meat on it. Fish, shellfish, red meat, chicken, mostly just fish is what I’ve been giving him though, since I’m assuming that's what makes up most of his diet. Want to make sure he gets all the proper nutrients, you understand, you understand.”

“Uh huh.”

“As for ‘Likes,’ we’ve got fish, human stuff, Scar, Grian-”

“Scar first?” Grian cut his friend off with a raised eyebrow. Scar blinked several times before answering.

“What?”

“Scar, Grian. You put your name before mine.”

“Well this list wasn’t meant to be in order, but if it was, my name would absolutely go before yours.”

“What! No it wouldn’t. He likes us equally. Mumbo and I have a mutual understanding that we do not want to be anywhere near each other most of the time. We respect each other. From a distance.”

Scar smirked, throwing Mumbo an amused look as if he understood anything that was going on. “You know if you wanted to you could also bring him gifts and stuff. Nothing is stopping you. You could even bring him his fish if you wanted to, he wouldn’t know the difference. I wouldn’t care. There’s really nothing to be afraid of, especially now when he’s so docile like this.”

“I’m not afraid of Mumbo.”

“No?”

“If anything, he’s afraid of me, Scar. I got him in that net, I’ve gotten close to killing him a couple times- he knows it, Scar, he knows. He knows what’ll happen if he steps out of line, that’s what. I told him. I told him all about it.”

“Did you now,” Scar chuckled, nudging Grian playfully, “Well in that case, I’m definitely sure he likes me more. And I’m sure you’re perfectly content with being feared, but if you ever change your mind, I’d be happy to help.”

Grian huffed, “I won’t. Continue though.”

Scar lingered for a moment, a gentle fondness etched on his features before turning back to the paper, reading, “Well, he plays around with those vines and roots and things sometimes, he clearly is very curious, he likes to learn, and I think he likes birds, but he might just be staring at them because he wants to eat them. I put bugs in our ‘Neutral’ category since every time I try to give him a bug he just eats it, but I can’t tell if he just eats bugs or if he’s scared of them or something.”

“I highly doubt Mumbo is afraid of bugs. I doubt he cares.”

“Well, you never know! In ‘Dislikes’ we’ve got nets, sleeping bags, being touched, fighting- actually this isn't super related, but I really want to set up a Good and Bad system with him. A thumbs up thumbs down kind of situation. I was thinking about it all last night- we aren’t very good at communicating what we like or don’t like, and this feels like a good solution, but I’m not exactly sure how to tell him clearly what I’m trying to do. How would he know thumbs up means ‘good.’ And vice versa? Maybe bad would be easier to start with, but at the same time he kinda seems like a bite first ask questions later kinda guy.”

“Oh, that’s a good idea. Definitely start with thumbs up. With any luck he’ll understand that thumbs down is the opposite and you can go from there. I think you could probably associate the gesture with things Mumbo likes. The tape measure, fish- he knows smiling is a positive thing even if he doesn’t smile himself, and he knows what ‘yes’ means as well. With enough of that, I think he’ll grasp the meaning pretty quick.”

“I think so too,” Scar paused for a moment, thoughtful, “You know, this doesn’t just have to be a me effort. You could come and speak to him as well. He would know you’re putting in the effort if you wanted him to like you more.”

“He likes me plenty!” Grian switched from relaxed to exasperated on a dime, throwing up his hands as Scar laughed. “He likes me, Scar.”

“I know he likes you. But I also know he doesn’t have the full picture. He doesn’t know how much time you spend brainstorming how to teach him things, or how to relieve his stress, or worrying when he’s not feeling well. I just want him to know you aren’t as distant as he probably thinks, especially if it bothers you. If you wanted to get a little closer and help me with the ‘good’ and ‘bad’ gestures, that’d be a start.”

Grian was silent for a long time, brows creased tight above his eyes. “Maybe,” he said finally, almost quietly, “But not today. I’m too tired.”

“Yeah, me too,” Scar sighed, content, letting his head fall to rest on top of Grian’s, who squeaked, jumping so hard he accidentally jabbed at Scar’s chin with his shoulder. It must not have hurt though, because Scar didn’t seem to mind at all, unmoving. Slowly, Grian untensed, his head falling gently on Scar’s shoulder. Mumbo had a somewhat ridiculous pang of longing despite still holding a strong aversion to any human touch at all. They just looked so relaxed- anyone would wonder what it was like to be human. Though, while Scar closed his eyes, Grian didn’t quite look satisfied, something like conflict sitting across his features. He sat like that for a while, eyes moving, but not quite looking at anything at all, apparent restlessness building. Then he stopped. Closed his eyes. Opened them.

“Scar, are you aromantic or are you just fucking with me? Because I outright refuse to believe anyone is actually this clueless.”

Scar opened his eyes. Silence. “Uh oh.”

“Uh oh???” It was safe to say the two of them did not look relaxed anymore, Grian jerking away, “Scar, what does ‘uh oh’ mean. You can not just say ‘uh oh’ and nothing else.” Mumbo’s fins raised at the tone of his voice, but Mumbo cringed back when Grian whipped around to face him with an aggressive point. “No. You stay. Scar, I need you to say more right now.”

“I-Sleeping, I mean, we weren’t sleeping yet- but resting like- not friends? Not normal? Bdubs- I am going to strangle that man!”

“So you’re aromantic?” The words leapt off Grian’s tongue like an accusation, but he relaxed almost immediately after, sighing into his hands, “You’re aromantic. Okay. Good. Okay.”

“I- I mean I don’t love labels. I don’t really know, I don’t know much of anything at all, really. I’m sorry, Grian, I didn’t- did no one tell you I have a horrible track record for these things? Did you want me to ask you out? I still can.”

“Goodness, Scar, no! You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do, you’ve just been sending incredibly mixed signals and I needed to know what was going on with you before my head exploded and my brains went all over the place and poor Mumbo would have to witness that and we don’t want that, do we? We don’t want that. This is fine, though, we just need to work out some boundaries.”

“What if I did want to though? To ask you out?”

Grian stared. Scar stared back.

“You do not want to.”

“I’ll have you know, I like you plenty a lot! I like you all sorts of ways, and if you also like me, then that’s cool! I’ll tell ya, when I had my little politics phase, my campaign manager was this great guy, Bdubs, we’re still friends, too, have you met him? Anyway, he’s a pretty touchy guy as well and he convinced me all sorts of things were totally normal friend stuff. Oh, we had this great cushy chair in our office and it was only really meant for one person, but sometimes we’d both be so tired and just squeeze into it and it wasn’t any sort of comfortable at all, but in a way it kinda was. Like inside. You know?”

“Scar, do you actually want to ask me out or are you just saying that because you think that’s what I wanted.”

“Isn’t that what you wanted?”

“Not what I asked.”

“Well, Grian, it really doesn’t matter to me either way!” Scar gave Grian a big smile, like these words were the ones that would definitively solve their dispute, but the expression started to drop when Grian looked mortified. “Is..” Scar started, unsure now, “Something wrong?”

Mumbo had never seen such a wide range of emotions cross Grian’s face before his head dropped onto his knees with a soft thunk. “No. It’s fine.”

Scar stared for a long while, a gentle churning of thought moving behind his eyes. He relaxed, scooching to give Grian a little space before smiling again, the expression soft. “Can I tell you a story?”

“Sure, Scar.” Grian’s voice was muffled between his knees, and given his face was covered, Mumbo had no idea how he was feeling.

“So there was this one time in high school where I was good friends with this girl, and she was awesome, just the best, and we hung out like constantly, and y’know how people get sometimes all pushy asking about dating and stuff, but you also know high schoolers who can’t communicate if their life was on the line. So all my friends are like dude, you guys are literally dating, aren’t you? And I say no! I insist we’re not every time, I insist! Yes, we went out together often and we talked for hours and her family had some money troubles so a lot of the time I offered to pay, you know, normal stuff, it was normal, I promise, but one day I get this call, right? From one of her friends! And this girl just starts ripping into me, like, seriously! She’s telling me all this stuff I had no idea about- telling me my friend is so confused, that she doesn’t feel pretty around me, that I’m always trying to avoid intimacy- that I refused to kiss her! And I was like what, whoa there! No one has ever tried to kiss me! Why are we talking about kissing people? She thought we were dating, Grian.”

“I got that.”

“And then she dumped me! My first breakup, and I didn’t even know! I was kinda bummed, too, I had always kinda wanted to kiss someone, but I thought they’d tell me first! Y’know, that they wanted to. I would have been so ready! The worst part is I think my guy friends were trying to tell me we were dating, not just teasing me. They also thought it was funny though, so. Who knows.”

“Yeesh.”

“I know, right! And this other time in college there was this other girl- we had mutual friends and stuff and we were at a party and just absolutely wasted and she grabbed me by the collar and she said ‘SCAR,’ she yelled in my face, she said ‘I’ve been FLIRTING with you for WEEKS and YOU’VE been flirting BACK. ARE YOU GAY?’ And I said, drunk, ‘A little bit!’ And then we danced all night. It was awesome. She was so cool. That kinda stuff happened a lot in college, actually. Guys are a bit more direct, which I appreciate. I’m a little stupid, I need the extra help sometimes.”

Grian tensed where he was sitting, quiet for a short pause before speaking, “You’re not stupid, Scar.”

“I mean. A little bit.”

“No. You’re not stupid.”

Scar was silent for a long while, staring despite Grian’s head still being buried in his knees. “I don’t know about that.”

Grian lifted his head, shaking it ‘no.’ He blinked a couple times before shaking his head again, a little more forcefully. “I’m sorry I snapped at you. I shouldn’t have done that, I should’ve just talked to you like an adult and told you how I was feeling. Sometimes you’re just really confusing, and that’s not your fault, you just.. go about the world in a different way. And it’s not a bad way either, it’s not wrong. If people can’t communicate exactly how they’re feeling to you, that’s a them issue. You’re not stupid. I’m sorry I made you feel that way.”

“I didn’t mean to lead you on. I never meant to hurt you.”

“I know, Scar. I shouldn’t have said that.”

“I really thought we had some sort of understanding- and I did mean it when I said we could give this a shot. I like dating, Grian, I always have a lot of fun! I can be- I know I can be- I have trouble sometimes, I just ruin good things-”

“Scar, stop, please. I don’t want anything you don’t want. Period.”

Scar didn’t seem to know what to do with that, staring uselessly at his own hands before looking back up. “I want it, Grian,” he stressed, his arms trembling, but Grian only stared, lips gently parted.

They both looked.. So sad. Mumbo longed to help, to sing, to do something, but he was stuck outside of their world.

Grian extended his arms. “C’mere, buddy.”

Scar collapsed into them, shaking as he did. Grian didn’t move, rubbing slow circles on Scar’s back while he cried. There was a certain focus behind Grian’s eyes, a certain calm as he held his friend close, and Mumbo.. well, it was clear Grian didn’t need Mumbo’s help. So that was the power of human touch.

He’d have to learn it one day.

[addsalwayssick]

When Remus awoke, he felt an unfamiliar pain on his face. He was used to pain everyone else, but never really on his face. He looked his side, and his long term, and also goregous crush, Sirius Black, was asleep at his bed side.

Remus touched his face lightly, where the pain was and felt his heart rate spike because no, this could not be happening. He prided himself in the fact that his already ugly face didn’t have a scar, but there one was. He glanced at a sleeping Sirius, who had probably already seen the scar. Remus started to panic. Sirius probably already thought he was ugly, but now what would he think of Remus?

Remus felt himself choke, and knew he had to get out of that room with a knocked out Sirius. He slowly got out of the cot, and he walked quickly to his dorm, locking himself in the bathroom. He didn’t really know what time is was, but he knew that everyone would be at classes. Remus doesn’t know how long he sobbed. He just knows that there were guttural sobs coming from his gut, gasping noises as he thought about how Sirius wasn’t even gay, but thought he was ugly. Even when Sirius called him perfect and beautiful, he knew now that it wouldn’t even matter.

After maybe an hour or two, he wiped his teary eyes and faced the mirror. It was worse than he thought. The scar spanned from his eyebrow to his lip, causing Remus to let out another choked sob. He heard a soft knock on the door followed my a soft voice. “Remus? It’s Sirius,” Sirius spoke from the other side of the door.

“Go away,” Remus choked. His heart clenched painfully, because why did Sirius have to be nice to him?

“Did I do something?” Sirius asked, too soft and kind for what Remus knew he was thinking on the inside. “Remus please let me in.”

Remus breathed deeply, knowing Sirius would stay until Remus came out. He opened the door carefully, sliding back to the bathroom floor, hiding his face.

Sirius, who at only 14 years old, stood tall and proud, had such worry and fear in his eyes. Remus had never seen it before. He looked through his fingers at Sirius.

Sirius dropped to his knees to look at Remus. “Remus what happened?”

Remus slowly uncovered his face, showing the scar and exposing it to the cold air. “Oh Remus,” Sirius gasped.

Remus put his face back in his hands and sobbed. “Get out, get out, please get out,” Remus sobbed hard.

Sirius waited until Remus lifted his tear stained, red and puffy face to look at him. “I’m sorry, I know i’m ugly, please just go away.”

Sirius looked at him funnily. “Remus…”

“What?” Remus snapped.

Sirius didn’t answer, but instead kissed him softly on the lips. It only lasted maybe a second, if that, and Remus still believes it, even 60 years later when they’re old and gray, that it was the best day of his life.

“What?” Remus asked softly. Sirius grimaced.

“God, i’m sorry Remus. I know you’re not queer or whatever it’s called, but I just-“

Remus just hugged him and sobbed. “You don’t think i’m ugly?”

“Remus you’re the least ugly person i’ve ever seen. You’re beautiful”

Remus shook his head. “You’re lying.”

Sirius looked heartbroken at his accusation. “Remus, i’m not. You’re amazing. And even the scar looks sick- like you fought a dragon or something.”

Remus sobbed harder, but not because he was sad anymore. Remus really didn’t deserve Sirius. But everyday, until the day they died, Sirius reminded Remus of how much Sirius didn’t deserve Remus.

ugh sirius is such a pookie in this guys. forcing the tall strong pookie sirius agenda onto all of you (forcing all agendas onto you i’m a pathological liar boooooo) meow <3

[hazshit-hotel-hater]

Angel Dust Redesign! (7/7)

FINALLY I AM DONE WITH THE MAIN 7 FREAKS.

Depending how I feel I might throw in some bonuses but these guys are your only guarantees! Going to be posting the full lineup separately because I don’t want to clutter this post!!

God okay where to start. I was talking about them in Husk’s post so let’s go with that. Angel’s clothing restrictions are his necklace and shoes. I might go on a bit of a tangent with this so forgive me 💔

For the necklace let me get this out of the way: yes it is a BDSM thing! I’m terrified people are going to take this as me being a weirdo but please as an adult content creator give me some space to explain before anyone jumps on me and hits me with a metal pipe. The intentions behind symbolism matter HEAVILY. I am against Vivzie’s portrayal of Angel’s abuse and the chain/collar imagery because it is blatantly either her being incredibly uncreative or her inserting her kinks into her shows. I think it is completely fine to use suggestive items in this way as long as the intentions are clear and not just there for no reason.

I would’ve probably done something else like a corset as a restriction, but I’d like to stop being so shy about Angel’s actual job. He is a pornstar and removing that outward aspect of him is taking a big chunk of his character away. I need more people to acknowledge that Angel enjoys sex and actively wanted to explore this side of himself. With the slip chain however, I would also like to portray how things Angel enjoys in his job have been used against him and made him come to resent what he does when he is forced into it. I think thats a pretty understandable thing to show.

This is harder to explain but the gist of it is just don’t be afraid to acknowledge Angel’s job. It’s okay to use sexual things as metaphors. Have you heard any christian song ever/hj

Alright with that out of the way, with the shoes. Angel’s feet are a large insecurity and discomfort of his which already makes his shoes some sort of restriction on their own, however if controlled, they can be made to stumble forward, fall over, etc. I wanted to show how Angel has freedom to go mostly wherever he pleases, though once again, that free will can be taken away very quickly.

I hated his suit so all suiting is gone entirely. He’s supposed to look attractive or eye catching at the very least. I’ve also added back the outer fangs he had in my first redesign!

I am much happier with the new one in comparison to this old guy. I know it’s only a few months old but you can really see how differently I draw him and the details I pay attention to more like the shape of his hair. Aside from the old one! I wanted Angel himself to still keep the reddish pink to show wrath and destain being masked as lust, except now his clothing is actually the pinkish-purple lust colour and it covers more eye grabbing parts of his body like the chest, hands, hips, and so on.

I don’t think I’ve ever outwardly mentioned Angel having polycoria but he does and it’s probably my favourite feature to draw aside from his hair. About the hair and fur: Angel used to have spots and basic stripes before his contract with Valentino, where afterwards they began to curl into their cordiform shapes. Most physical overlord changes with hair and skin tend to not go away, so depending on who you make a contract with it’s either a fun perk or a sort of scar.

Once again, not sure if I will be continuing with anymore in this specific lineup, but if I do end up posting more of these I really hope you like those too! 💣

[g0g0at]

Malevolent part 48 spoilers live blog

Oooooh I’ve heard good things about this episode

Starting off strong with Arthur coughing his lungs up

BLOOD?! TUBERCULOSIS

Spooky hallwayyyyy

John is gonna take the lead this episode it seems

Ooooh more people?

Oh someone is speaking!

Kinda thought they would all have sewn lips

Who’s that?

This is more characters in one space at a time

Moreeeeeeee voicessss

Bro just straight up dying and these guys don’t bat an eye

Oooh ok so they’re all waiting

“Speaking of sick, who are you?”

Gerard? A vin- a what?

A WEEK??

So much for being late

Oooh I’m liking these voices

He sounds like s1 Arthur

Friendly Friar

I am gonna lose track of these characters so quick

Forgotten all their names already

Oh my god Arthur

There’s so much talking this is really different (not in a bad way)

Get a snack Arthur PLEASE

The witch?

Oh wait that guy is French

Spooky lady at the bottom of the stairs…

Slay the princess reference omg

I love this music

Who is this

This is making me think of the green knight

I actually do kinda need this layout refresher it’s hard to keep track

Hmmmm many characters to ask

Lengwood does not like him BHAHAHAH

EWWW

John is in support mode hehe

I do kinda like this character he’s interesting

Are they gonna get picked off one by one

“It’s only death” Arthur like “yes indeed, I died just the other day!”

I’m very curious about this Everard now

Hmmm well John and Arthur are seeking answers

Ah he knows… maybe

Ooh that’s ominous

Oooh someone is coming……….

Everard?

Modern… interesting

Oooh this is so ominous I’m loving this

“No issue navigating” interesting…

Something about the way he says consonants scratches my brain

Seems Arthur fits the Warren role well

Mmm an architect

“Short while” BEHHAHAHS that feels like a roast ngl

So we have a friar, warren, architect, doctor (?), anstronomer

These guys are gonna be a big help me thinks…

“Visions the others cannot comprehend” want a bet

Ooooh what will it be

Black stone teehee

“I am not affiliated with the order?” Order of the fallen star?

Yep

Arthur accidentally getting himself drawn into a cult smh

Tomorrow night… well that’ll be next episode I assume

Arthur is probably gonna try take it… maybe

Uh they can’t give him the ring from the order hmmm

Loving that they’re working with non verbal communication as apposed to IGNORING EACHOTHER

Uh oh…

Making note of the scars

Ngl Arthur that’s not the BEST excuse

Ah they’re stuck with eachother for a bit

Hope those walls are soundproof…

John was doing a description!

Mmm yeah I wonder what getting evolved with great ones would do to your faith…

Calling him a heathen HAHA

Arthur is back in the game YEAAAAH

Well maybe…

One of these guys is gonna get murdered FOR SURE

They’re going to pick eachother off

John needs to NOT sleep tonight he’s gonna need to play watch dog

Arthur admitting he’s not ok? Wow who’da thought. Character development!

Who’s moving around

“Sit” “it helps me think” I liked that little exchange idk

Why are you talking about football

He’s trying to get them to fight for it?

Mmmmm so it’s a test?

CALLLLLLLED IT

Murder mystery!!!

Who got murdered?

You think John suspects the power won’t work anymore?

It didn’t with the witch…

Or maybe he’s just nervous to go through it

Man they’re all pointing fingers smh

Ooooh it’s a who done it heheheh

RIP Lengwood

Friar might have done it but he could be a red herring

Well that’s a bloody murder you would get a little blood on you for that

These guys would not solve shit without Arthur

Common interest…

Ah ok order stuff

Devious devious

Ah the ring!!

Arthur can use their’s if necessary

Well shouldn’t you look at Lengwood’s corpse?

Yes yes

OH FUCK

You two need to get rid of that ring

ARTHUR YOU’RE MAKING YOURSELF LOOK SUSPICIOUS

AURGHHHHHH

Arthur has an alibi but you lot can’t hear him!

Friar answered way too quick

“Don’t you mean again” BHAHAHHAHA

John is reluctant to touch the body… does the power not work anymore..?

Ditch the ring!!! Ditch it!! You don’t need it!! Or hide it in your shoe or some shit

SHOE PUT IT IN YOUR SHOE

WHY DID HE JUST DUMP IT

Barnabus jumpscare

Why you grabbing him like that stop that

This guys is a bit creepy

These guys have a guilty before innocent thing

“He studies your face with a cleverness. It’s hidden slightly, behind the veneer of alcohol” nice line I like that

They’re gonna buddy up?

There’s gonna be a brawl or something

Arthur you’re toeing a dangerous line

Everard WANTS you guys to be picked off, he’s not a good alibi

“I’m excited for you to see” the dead body????

Cool chapel? Sounds like it could be?

Oh Lengword woods

“His body is sprawled upon the steps, face to the side in grotesque tableau of agony. His face wears a horrible scream.” Great imagery goddamn

No ring… damn

You guys are bad at investigating stuff

Yeah they’re gonna wanna check your bag probably

How would they explain away Yorick?? “Hey sorry yeah that’s just my severed head, he’s chill dw”

Why is Elia on body disposal duty

Bro is poking at Baranabus BHAHAHAH get FUCKED

Loving the non-verbal communication between these two

What IS Arthur doing

HE’S GONNA PLANT IT. Or something similar

Oh Arthur you sneaky SNEAKY bastard

Clever clever

Everard just dipped BAHHAHHA

I know this is just how Arthur is in his element but also he fits the Warren role

So much for touching the body…

Why do people keep asking him if he’s a good person

Kayne? Horig? Or maybe the KiY??

Omg wait maybe is it Horig…

He was taken to the dreamlands?? Maybe…

OH WHAT THE FUCK

Why’d he do that?

Horrifying imagery, love it

BAHAHA HE’S JUST FLOATING

Well you missed your opportunity

“All you worship the way I do” ehhh Arthur not so much

Dang Everard is a horrid host

So someone else might die overnight

Your alibi really ditched you BAHHAHA

So Barnabus did do it? Maybe

Oooooh black stone next episode!!

[glassartpeasants]

Calling To The Moon

Overhaul x F!Reader

Warnings: Child abuse, physical abuse, emotional abuse, death, slight gore, suicide, mentions and implications of self-harm, dead dove do not eat

A/N: This is probably the saddest shit I've ever written. I know I've said that before probably, but I'm serious this time. It took me a whole month nonstop to finish this. I wanted to make it perfect for you guys and just simply for myself. I'm very proud of this fic, and it took me so long to get it to the point where I was confident with the writing and editing. This fic is VERY long, and I mean VERY LONG. It was a whole 25 pages in Google Docs and has 9,603 words in it. I really hope you guys like and it would mean the world to me if you could tell me how I did. I hope you guys like it and enjoy <3

~~~

The atmosphere in the base has never been so cold. No matter what, every room and hall felt colder than the arctic sea. Both temperature and emotion wise. You’d ask your husband to turn up the heat, but he was always busy and seemingly never in a good mood. Which only added to the cold feeling. Summer or winter, it was always cold. Even colder when you’d guys have an argument.

Arguing with him was hell. He’d talk over you and say such hurtful things. Belittling you and ignoring whatever you had to say. In every argument, he stood victorious because you just wanted his horrible words to stop. He’d bring up things that he’d promise to never tell a soul. Yet there he was, using your past against you.

It feels like your chest is getting ripped open every time you do. The times he’d spit his venom when he wore his mask was terrifying. You could see a danger in his eyes, like how a lamb fears a wolf. You hated feeling this way. He was your husband. He shouldn’t be scaring you and threatening you. But here you were.

He never did it in front of other yakuza leaders, which is why you enjoyed the meetings so much. He'd act as lovingly as someone like him would during a meeting. These times would remind you of why you married him. How'd he act like he was proud being next to you. Telling you he loved you in ways only you both know. It was amazing while it lasted. The feeling of being wanted.

After 8 months of being married, though, he started to change.

He’d never sleep in the same bed as you anymore. You don’t know if he moved to a different room or if he slept in his office. You've searched your brain for anything but can't think of a single reason as to why he would just up a ditch you like that.

It really crushed your self-esteem. Having your once loving husband act like you were so disgusting. Looking at you like he does his enemies no matter what you wore or done. You tried wearing what used to be his favorite thing to see on you, but he completely ignored you. Acting as if you didn’t exist.

Then, he’d look at you with loving eyes that made you forget how he treated you only moments before. When that horrible mask and ugly jacket were off, he'd look at you like he did before you had the ring on your finger. It was times like this that kept you right by his side. No matter the horrible words his other side spilled.

But the mental toll was soon piling up, one small feather enough to make you crash down.

With the mental toll overflowing, it caused feelings you’ve tried so hard to bury to resurface. Times to before you met him. Parts of your life that you wish would burn away from your memories. But, the physical scars you carried only worsened it. You hated yourself, hated the loneliness that crushed you. Hated the way your past haunted you.

All these made your life unbearable. No matter what medication, no matter the ‘self-care’ people would recommend, nothing made you feel complete.

All your ‘friends’ left you as soon as they saw how dark you truly felt inside. They called you a ‘debbie downer.’ So no matter what, they left you to decay and continue their lives without you. You remember thinking that there was no point. No life in your light to scare away the darkness. Then, you met him, and everything changed.

But that was then. Now, you were feeling the darkness creep back inch by inch as you sat on the compound's couch.

The sterile scented environment contrasted greatly to the smell of tea in front of you. The only light was the moonlight shining through the windows. The room felt once again so cold. Hopelessness filled you as sleep still seemed so far away.

“You guys seem like such a happy family. I don’t see why all this happened.” The cop stood in front of the couch where you and your mother resided. You on the far right arm and her on the left. You desperately tried to put as much room as possible between the two of you.

“I'm sorry, officer. My daughter was just having an attention episode. Sorry to take your focus away from real problems.” Your mother’s response was smooth and calm, but you knew what hid behind them. Her stone mask always failed to deceive you, as you knew her best.

You were no fool. You knew she would severely punish you as soon as the officer left. It was just comical, really. How you were stuck in such a position in the first place. It happened only hours ago, yet it was still fresh in your mind like a burn wound. 

“Is this abuse, huh?!” The look in her eyes was so terrifying that you still see it in your nightmares. Her nails dug into the back of your neck, and you felt her nimble fingers squeezing your throat. Your heart seemed to stop at the reality that this was really happening. The way your mother held your throat as you went to pry it off. Although, it ended as soon as it started. She whipped her hands away from you and gave you one last death glare before stomping toward her room. 

Tears poured down your face as you took deep breaths, trying to gather the air that your lungs craved harshly. The feeling of her fingers still wrapped around your neck made the helplessness inside you explode as you started frantically searching for a bag.

The sunset illuminated the room as you managed to find a bag before shoving anything you could into it. Clothes, phone, charger, things that held emotional value, anything you could fit, you brought. 

Stepping out of your room and into the hallway, you feel scared. Worrying that you’ll turn the corner and see your mother standing there with that look in her eyes once more. But to your luck, she was nowhere to be seen. 

You turn towards the door and stare at the handle. It felt as if a strong force was holding your body still. Grabbing all the strength you could muster, you shakingly move your hand towards the door handle, opening it silently. Gently, you moved your feet out of the house and shut the door as quietly as you opened it. The wooden deck creaked below you as you tried to walk across it. Your heart beats in your ears as you bite your lip in anxiety. Being caught right now was something of nightmares. Yet, the sound of dirt crunching beneath your shoes made you let out a breath you didn’t know you were holding.

Then, you ran.

You ran down the driveway and onto the dirt road that held yours and many other houses. Your shoes crunched against the ground as dirt flew behind you as you ran as fast as your legs could carry you. The sound of rocks hitting the earth fell on deaf ears.

The trees surrounded you and cheered you on as the wind rustled their leaves. Cold air enveloped your body as your cursed yourself for not wearing a jacket, but it didn’t matter. How your body ran gave your body enough heat to survive for now. Adrenaline pumped through your veins, and all you could think of was running. To run till you collapsed or reached your grandparents only a few miles away. You’d finally be safe and wanted there.

The sun set faster than you imagined, and the once beautiful sky was soon replaced with stars that called you. Telling you to come visit them. That you’ll be safe there. The urge to reach for the stars was crushed as red and blue lights surrounded you and the trees. They hid the stars above you, and the feeling of loneliness once again encapsulated you. Tears threatened down your cheeks as you heard a man’s voice tell you to get in the car. Saying that he’s taking you home.

What was back there was no home to you.

You got into his car without a fuss despite the urge to fight. The way back to your hell was quiet as the cop said nothing to you. The back seat of his vehicle was cold and unwelcoming. Dread filled you as you pulled up to the place you had run from only hours before. The image of your mom standing on the deck haunts you as she waits for her ‘attention-seeking daughter’ to come home.

“Why are you crying?”  A light voice ripped you from your reflection of the past and brought you back to the present. With blurry eyes, you try to make out the voice that called out to you.

“I just had a moment. Sorry, you had to see that. I thought everyone was asleep.” Wiping your eyes, you blink away the remaining tears as you finally catch a glimpse of the man in front of you.

You’ve never seen him before.

“Who are you?” You couldn’t help but be suspicious. 

“My names Gushiken Taro. I just started today, so I’ve yet to meet everyone.”

“Oh, that makes sense. Well, my name is Chisaki (Y/N). It's a pleasure to have you here at the compound.” You sent him a welcoming smile. His voice seemed so young. From what you could actually see of him, he still looked like a teenager or had the body of one. 

“You must be Overhaul’s wife, I assume?” God, you hated that name. Ever since that name had left your husband's tongue, your life has been nothing but constant dread. 

“Yes, that's correct. May I ask how old you are?”

“Your much more friendly, I have to say. But I’ll be turning 19 in a few weeks.” You couldn’t hide the shock on your face. His age would be the same as…his.

“That's so young! How did you get caught up in the yakuza so young?” 

“It’s a long story, haha. But why is the leader's wife crying at midnight?” You didn’t know what to say, so you just answered his question. 

“I couldn’t sleep. I just…get emotional when I don’t sleep.”

“Understandable. I’d love to chat more, Mrs. Chisaki, but I must find my way out of this maze and back to the exit. It’s so late, and I must go home. It’s dark, so it may take a while.”

“I can help you to the exit.”

“Really? Are you sure?” Standing up, you grab your tea and hold a smile on your face.

“I’m sure everyone deserves to be helped.”

“Thank you very much. I shall follow you.” You nodded as you led him towards the exit, making small conversations along the way. A familiar feeling to protect slowly crawled back.

~~~

Despite being so close to another human being, your husband no less, you still felt so cold. You tried to ignore the goose bumps that littered your arms, but you still let out a shiver on accident. 

“Hey, Overhaul, your pretty wife over there is shivering. Why don’t you give her your jacket, huh? Take care of a special thing like her.” The gruff voice of an older man cut through the air. You saw the leader of the farthest clan looking at Kai with an eyebrow raised. His hair was white, and his skin wrinkled, giving you the impression of him being in his late 60s or early 70s. Reminding you of your own grandfather.

You were shocked, to say the least. No ones ever mentioned you in a meeting before. Well, not in the way where they asked your husband to do something for you in front of everyone. A warmth spread across your face as the feeling of happiness made a small smile appear on your face. It’s been a while since anyone, including your husband, has called you pretty or special. You felt appreciated even if it was by someone you didn’t know.

Shooting your husband a quick glance, he caught your eye before you saw a frown appear from behind his mask. You said nothing as you expected the air to continue to nip at your skin and you’d stay cold, but you were pleasantly surprised when you felt familiar purple feathers surround you and block your vision. The heat of his body that was once trapped in the coat now surrounded you. Snuggling up in the warm fabric, you send a kind smile to the old man who sat in the back. You felt like your husband's love surrounded you for the first time in months.

A flash of white appeared out of the corner of your eye. Moving your head slightly, you ignored the men around you talking. A familiar figure stood by the door. You send the man a subtle wave and smile at him. Your smile grew bigger when the man sent one back.

~~~

 You started walking back to your room, a skip in your step as your husband's jacket still hung on your form. His purple feathered hood surrounded your face and tickled your nose as his scent covered you. The smell felt safe and made you feel so sleepy. What you wouldn’t give to sleep with your husband's scent again. Feel as if he was actually lying next to you.

“(Y/N).” The stoic sound of your husband's voice broke you of your small fantasy. You knew what was gonna happen. He was probably going to ask for his jacket back and then degrade you. Taking a deep breath to build up your walls, you spin around to look at him, smiling as you try to show a confident front.

“Yes, love?” his shoes echoed against the walls as he moved closer towards you. You tried your best not to shake in anxiety, not knowing his next move.

“Give me my jacket.” You take it off and give it back without even batting an eye. The cold coming back to attack your uncovered skin.

“Anything else I can help you with-”

“I’m not letting you come to the meetings anymore.” You look at him, shocked, as you try to piece together what made him make such a harsh decision so quickly.

“What? Why?”

“Obviously, you're a distraction to the real tasks at hand. I don’t want people paying attention to you when there are more important things to focus on.” With such small words, you feel your walls start to crash.

“All he said was that I was cold! You didn’t have to give me your jacket. You could have continued talking.” He looked at you like you were some stupid little girl. A look you knew all too well.

“If you had a brain, you’d see that that’d be a bad choice. If I want money, I have to make them trust me.”

“Oh, so fake being nice to your wife is a way to get respect and people to trust you?” His sharp eyes turned to daggers as he looked at you.

“I don’t have time to talk to you. I’ve got more important things to do.”

“Good! Because I also have more important things to do than talking to you asshole.” You turn around to stomp away but feel a firm grip wrap around your wrist. He aggressively dragged you to your room before closing the door and making you face him. Your husband's golden eyes bore into your own. Despite the fear that infected your blood, you tried to hide it.

“Who do you think you are to talk to your superior like that.” His voice low, and the grip on your wrist turned bone-crushing.

“Superior?! Kai, your my husband! And let me go! You're hurting me!” His grip on your wrist only got tighter, and you felt a stinging sensation erupt from his fingertips as his gloves disintegrated in front of you.

“It’s Overhaul. Kai is dead.” Your eyes blew wide at his statement. Confusion wracked your body as you searched for an answer.

“Overhaul?! What the fuck are you talking about Kai-” A horrific pain shot through your arm that Kai so aggressively held. Tears spilled harshly down your face as you screamed in pain. Red liquid covers your body as you try to grab the now missing appendage. Searing pain causes you to lose your footing as your salty tears fall on the ground.

Then, the pain stopped.

Your body trembled as you felt your once missing arm now back where it should have been. The sensation of losing something so important still puzzled your body as you tried to grab a sense of what had just happened.

“It's Overhaul, don’t make me tell you again.” The sound of his footsteps leaving your room haunted you as the door closed. Your lungs seemingly couldn’t get enough air as you tried to gasp and heave at the horror of your husband doing something he promised never to do.

~~~

“What could you possibly be depressed about?! What made you so sad that had you scratching yourself with a pencil till you bleed! Fucking pathetic, doing it for attention, aren’t you? You wanna see real cuts?!” The way your mother grabbed your wrist had you wincing in pain as she put your hand on fresh yet scabbing cuts on her arms. Her eyes tearing into yours as she moved your hand across her skin, yelling at you the entire time.

“This is what real depression is! Not your pathetic attempt at attention seeking. God, your so useless! Not everything is about you! Have you ever thought about how I feel?!”

You didn’t know how she found out. You tried everything to keep what you were doing to yourself a secret. Cause you feared what would happen if she saw your freshly open wounds on your arms.

It was the only thing that made you feel better. It took away the pain you felt inside and moved it to where you decided to dig the graphite of your pencil into your skin. The pain it caused numbed the pain you felt inside. It gave you something else to pay attention to. Sometimes, you’d dig the pencil even deeper into your skin, feeling like you deserved the pain you were causing yourself and what you felt inside.

You deserved it, you deserved it, you deserved it repeated in your head as you cry into the dark of your room, scratching the barely healed scars on your arms. Looking up at the ceiling, wondering what you could do to make the pain disappear. You’d cry into your pillows as the feeling of those fresh cuts on your mother's arms still tingled against your fingertips. Dry blood smeared on them with small spots under your nails. Holding your hands together, you look outside at the moon, crying for it to take you away.

You could see the moon shining through the small bathroom window. You got an even greater view with the window being wide open. The crescent moon reminds you of cartoons you used to watch when you were young. 

Candles surrounded you as the lights were turned off to try and calm yourself down. To relieve the anxiety and fear that had been coursing through your veins ever since yesterday. The bath was so warm and inviting as it convinced you to stay longer. To ignore the pain that still ghosted your heart. You didn’t dare leave your bathroom or room, fearing what Kai-Overhaul, would do.

It was such a numbing feeling. Knowing your husband put his hands on you after promising he never would. Breaking a promise, he told you ‘he’d rather die than break.’

Obviously, it didn’t mean anything anymore.

Your heart constricted as you looked up to the moon, begging for answers. Asking what you’d done to deserve this? Asking what you could do to get rid of the numbing feeling that overtook you. To feel something other than emptiness. To escape these all too familiar feelings.

Just then. A shiny glint caught your eye at the rim of the tub.

~~~

The sound of the screaming kettle let you know your tea was finally ready. Grabbing your favorite tea cup, you walk towards the steaming kettle.

Putting your cup on the tray, you grab the kettle before pouring it over the strainer filled with green tea leaves you had already set up. The tea goes into the teapot underneath it. A smile on your face as these times were one of the only times that brought you any sort of happiness. This used to be your husband's favorite, and he quickly had you hooked on it. The smell filled the kitchen with a homey feeling.

You put the teapot on the tray and some tea snacks before you make your way to the living room, only to be stopped by crashing into something immediately. The sound of everything hitting the ground made you cover your ears.

“Oh shit, Mrs. Chisaki, I’m so sorry!” The familiar voice of Gushiken filled the kitchen.

“It's okay. Things happen. It was an accident.” Looking down, you see the tea everywhere, and the teapot shattered into seemingly millions of pieces. Alas, your teacup was nowhere to be found.

“I managed to save the cup, if that means anything.” The man hands you the still intact cup. A breath of relief left your lips as you held the cup tightly, afraid it might drop any second.

“Please, let me help clean up. It’s my fault for not saying I was approaching.” You let out a laugh as you set your teacup away before you crouch down to pick up the broken pieces of what was your least favorite pot anyways. As long as your cup was fine, you were okay.

Making piles of glass, you and him gently grabbed them and threw them away. Mopping up the spilled tea and throwing the tray away in fear of Overhaul throwing a tantrum.

“Hey, what happened to your arm? Did some of the glass get you?” Looking at your arm, you see your long-sleeved shirt exposing minor cuts along your arm. Freezing up, you quickly lie.

“Oh! I guess. I didn’t even notice.”

“Well, can I help wrap it up? My sister was a nurse, and she taught me a few things. It's my fault your hurt anyways.” guilt plagued your mind at his words.

“I…okay.”

~~~

You sat at the kitchen island and watched as Gushiken wrapped up your arms with care. Much kinder and soft than Overhaul has been with you in so long. A feeling filled your body as he tended your wounds. You felt cared for. Like you were worth something to someone.

“There, you should be okay. Just make sure to change it and keep it clean to avoid infection.”

“I will thank you so much, Gushiken.”

“Can I ask you a question? It's kinda personal, so you don’t have to answer it if you don’t want to.”

“Um, sure? What is it?”

“Why does Overhaul never have you around? He seemingly avoids you life your the plague, and every time your name gets brought up, his brows furrow in disdain.” It was a really personal question he asked, but you were surprised no one else had asked you it earlier. 

“I don’t know. I couldn’t tell you who the man you see before us now is. This man isn’t the man who used to treat me like I was worth more than any jewels he’d gain. He is no longer the man who called me beautiful every chance he could. He’s not the man that asked me to marry him.” Tears brimmed your eyelids as you did your best to avoid crying. You didn’t want to look all red-faced and red-eyed in front of Gushiken.

“I don’t understand. Did a switch just flip inside him? Was there a fight or something?” His confusion was shared as you didn’t understand your husband's reasons either.

“No. Just one day, instead of the black mask he used to always wear, he wore the one that now adorns his face. The one that causes fear to anyone that looks at it. Then, he seemingly turned into a whole other man.” You felt your throat constricting as you try to talk without hiccuping.

“I’m sorry, Mrs. Chisaki.” The remorse he expressed in his voice made your body shake as you lowered your head. He couldn’t see how affected you truly were by your husband's actions towards you. It wasn’t his problem that your husband changed.

“You should probably continue working. I don’t want you to get in trouble.” Your voice cracked as your lips tremble.

“But-”

“Please.” With a sigh, Gushiken got up from the stool he sat on.

“As you wish, Mrs. Chisaki. I hope you feel better soon.” His footsteps soon ran out of earshot as you simply looked at your knees. You could feel your tears fall on the clothing that covered them. Your problems were your own. Someone as young as him should just be worried about other things. You regret letting your emotions get the best of you and talking about it. 

Not wanting everyone else to see your tears, you get up from the stool and walk down the empty halls toward your room. Not looking up from the floor.

~~~

It was easier to fold laundry with music playing. It helped keep your mind out of all the negative thoughts that plagued it. You made your own little playlist that you liked to listen to during times like this. One specific song you always looked forward to. 

The song that played at your wedding that he danced with you to.

Speaking of said song, the familiar tune soon emitted from your phone. A smile spread on your face as you stopped folding laundry and started to dance along to the haunting melody. Imagining you weren’t dancing alone.

“You look gorgeous, my angel.” His words melted your heart as you looked at the man in front of you with love.

“And you look so handsome. I could stare into your eyes for eternity.” His gaze was so soft, and just being near him made you feel so calm. So safe. Knowing that as long as you were with him, he’d protect you till his dying breath.

“I don’t know how I got so lucky to find you. What did I do to deserve you?”

“I couldn’t imagine myself with another man. You're the only person that’ll forever have my heart.” Your heart thumped inside your chest as you felt him place his forehead against yours. His voice turned into a low hum as the tune matched the song that played around you. You couldn’t help but join along as you danced together, never wanting it to end.

“I’ll love you till my dying breath, my angel.”

“I’d walk around the world just to be with you. Through hell and high water, I’ll never stop loving you.”

The gorgeous melody that once played was soon replaced with another one. Your memory of so long ago tearing your heart in two. Memories of a better time where you were wanted, where you were loved. It haunted you like a ghost no matter what. His ghost haunted you, a ghost of who he used to be.

A ghost you’d still dance with if given the chance.

KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK

“Hello?” Who could be knocking? All the precepts were on missions, and Overhaul was in a meeting.

“(Y/N)? It’s me, Hari.”

“Come in.” The door opened with a creak, and a familiar masked man emerged.

“I just came to-”

“Take off the mask.”

“Huh?”

“Take off the fucking mask. I see it enough every day, no matter where I go. All I ask is to see the real face of a friend.” A second hesitation before he unclasped the mask to look at you. The face of an old friend finally back.

“You look so much more attractive and friendly without that dumb mask.” A chuckle left his lips as he smiled lightly at you. It reminded you of when you, Overhaul, and Hari would sit outside in the sun and enjoy each other's company. Talking about god knows what.

“I just came here to escort you to Overhaul’s meeting. Other Yakuza leaders have actually been worried about you.” Your eyes widen at his words.

“Really? Thats…nice. It’s been a while since someone has worried about me other than Gus-” You stop at your words, too concerned for his safety.

“Gushiken? Yeah, I’ve noticed you talking to him. But don’t worry, I won’t tell. I’m just happy you have someone to talk to. I’d be there, but-”

“It’s okay. I know ‘Overhaul’ has been running you ragged ever since he started his stupid ‘plan.’ I don’t blame you for not having enough energy. It’s stupid how he pushes his best friend around.” You walk towards Hari, ready to leave the room. Without a word, you feel Hari’s arms wrap around you. It’s been so long since you’ve felt someone's embrace. You hugged him back, happy to be next to an old friend.

“It may not mean much, but I care and worry about you too. Even if I don’t have the time to show it.” You could feel his heartbeat against your chest, but you embraced it.

“Thank you, Hari. That means so much more to me than you know.”

~~~

The meeting was almost over by the time you and Hari arrived. You didn’t worry too much about it, though, as Hari told you, it was still almost over when he went to collect you. With a gulp, you opened the door to see everyone looking at you. You force a smile as you wave to everyone and greet them.

“Ah, it’s so good to see you’re okay, Mrs. Chisaki. We were worried you had come down with something.” Your husband glanced at you before you lied.

“No need to fret. I’ve just been busy with things in the family. Mom’s getting old, and she needs someone to take care of her.” The term mom almost makes you puke in your throat. The thought of doing anything for that woman made your stomach churn.

“You have such a caring wife, Overhaul. I’m jealous.” With a chuckle, the old man speaks to your husband.

“Yes. I’m very proud and happy I married her. She’s truly an angel in disguise.” His words made your heart skip a beat. In pain or in love? You didn’t know. It might have been something to appease the other leaders. Yet, hearing him say such beautiful words about you had you struggle to hold back tears and not jump into his arms. Tell him that you loved him so. The urge was shoved deep down as he called the meeting over which everyone seemingly agreed.

With each leader that passed you, you gently smiled and thanked them for coming. They all sent a smile as well while they exited the room. With that last one leaving, your smile left, and you have your husband who still sat in his chair.

“Everyone except (Y/N) leave.” Your body went rigid as a lump fell in your throat. You look at Hari, and he simply shrugs. You felt him grab your hand and run his fingers over your knuckles before whispering, “You’ll be okay.”. He walked along with two other members that you couldn’t remember. When everyone was gone, you started to fiddle with your fingers to calm down.

“Overhaul is-”

“Shut up, I’m thinking.” You open your mouth to respond but close it just as quickly. 

“I don’t understand. Even without you, they worry about you rather than talk about the plan for a better society.” His brows furrowed as he stood up and walked towards you. Fear paralyzes your body as you watch him stop right in front of you. He moves his gloved hand to put the pad of his index finger underneath your chin. He moved your head up so you could look at one another in the eyes.

“What’s so special about you?” He looks at you with genuine confusion. It felt like it should have been more insulting. Your throat dries as his eyes pierce your soul.

“I don’t know.” Your voice small.

“Other than you being pure and quirkless. There's nothing special about you.” Those words echoed in your head as you remembered how those words would come out of a monster that haunted your past. 

“Then why marry me?” The words left your mouth before you could think. His eyes seemed to widen before going back to stone.

“I don’t know.” His words caused tears to fall from your eyes. They clung to your lashes, making the man in front of you one big blur.

“What happened to you? What happened to my husband? My angel?” His hand moved towards your cheek and wiped away your tears. But why? Why would he show such a display of affection after all this time? Despite all your questions, he remained silent as his gloved hand had yet to move from your cheek. You wanted to lean into it. To enjoy such a foreign touch from your husband. But you couldn’t.

“No…I can’t do this.” you turn away from his hand before running out of the room and away from his touch. You couldn’t handle it. So much time since his last loving touch that it now felt wrong. It wasn’t fair for him to play with your feelings like this. To treat you so horribly and then handle you with such care. It’s cruel.

~~~

“The moon looks so beautiful tonight.” Your voice cuts through the silence as you walk around the compound's roof. Once again, you couldn’t sleep, so what better way to pass the time than look at the moon?

Sitting on the very edge of the compound's walls, you look up to the moon with a blanket wrapped around you. Your heart beating loud enough to echo through your head as a wave of sadness washed over you.

“Everywhere I go, I always end up hurting. Every step of my life has brought me pain. I finally thought he would be the angel to pull me free.” Your lip quivers as you try to understand why.

“I ran away to free myself. I moved to another country, and misery still followed me. It’s like I can never escape. Like I was destined for pain and suffering.” the cold air whispered to you through the breeze, telling you something you couldn’t understand. 

“What other life did I live that caused this? Is there even a timeline where I can be truly happy?” The tears you’ve been holding back finally started to blur your vision.

“They always said things would get better. They promised. My grandparents, teachers, ‘friends,’ and doctors. They all told me to ‘give it time’ and ‘everything will be in your favor.’ I’m tired of waiting!” You clench your fists as you look up to the moon. You were so angry. All the emotions you’ve been bottling up soon turned into angry tears, the cracking of your voice evident as you try to speak.

“I…feel so stupid. For thinking he’d be the cure I needed. The person to chase away everything I tried to leave behind.” The sound of footprints made you freeze as you snapped your head to look behind you.

“Hari? H-How long have you been here?” Hiccups plague your voice even though you try to stop your tears.

“Long enough.” With a few more steps, he was sitting on the edge next to you. There was a few seconds of silence before he spoke.

“Do you wanna talk about it?”

“I wouldn’t want to burden you with my woes. You already got enough on your plate.”

“You could never bother me (Y/N).”

“...” Words seemed impossible as your heart beat against your ribs.

“How about where you used to live?”

“(Country Name). I came here when I was 18.” Such a small question, but you knew that he wanted to know why you were sobbing on the roof.

“Do you come up here often?”

“I’ve been coming more recently. The moon and stars always have comforted me.”

“They are beautiful. I can see why you would.” The silence was awkward, but you enjoyed his company regardless. 

“You’ve been bottling it up for a while, haven’t you? It’s okay. I understand. Talking about stuff like that is…hard.”

“There's not many therapists that want to work for the yakuza.” Hari let out a chuckle, and you couldn’t help but let one out as well. His laughter was always contagious. 

“Do you have any family? I heard grandparents but nothing else. You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to, though.”

“A brother and sister. I’ve never met my sister, but I grew up with my brother until…” Letting out a sharp exhale, you continue.

“Until he ran away. I was 17, and he was 14. I saw him go to bed, told him I loved him, and went to bed. The next morning, he was gone. He’s never contacted me, and even after all these years, I still can’t find him.” Your hands shake as you look at the ground below you.

“I’m sorry. Would there be a reason he’d just disappear?” It felt like a breath caught in your throat. You haven’t talked about her in so long. Your husband was the only one you told in deep detail about your childhood. Yet, when you look into Hari’s eyes, the care and concern that shine in them remind you of the day you told Kai. You’ve known Hari just as long as Kai, and if what he said earlier was true, then maybe you could get a small bit of the weight on your chest off. 

“My mother.” A deep breath left your lungs as you prepared yourself.

“My mother wasn’t known for her kindness. She had many problems. We’d be here till sunrise if I went into detail.”

“You can tell me whatever makes you comfortable. I promise.”

“Thank you, Hari…” You sent him a small smile as you continued.

“My father wasn’t in the picture, so it was just my mother. My grandparents as well but only visits with them. The house we lived in was on its last legs. Lots of spots were decaying, and we didn’t have the money to fix it. We didn’t have the money for food either. Many nights, my brother and I went hungry.” You glance at the man next to you, and a look of sadness is plastered on it.

“She brought a lot of strange people over. A lot we didn’t know. I didn’t trust any of them, so I ignored all of them and never let my brother out of my sight. Me and him were extremely close during this time, so his disappearance made it that much harder for me.” Tears spill down your cheeks, making them red as the cold air bit them.

“Everything was my fault. No matter what happened, I deserved the punishment and rage. Something so small could cause her to explode. Yet, I couldn’t let my brother be treated like I was, so any mistakes he made, I took the blame. I’m the big sister. My job was to protect and still…”

“No one was there to protect you.” His voice was soft as he stole the words from your mouth. You scooted closer to him just to enjoy his company more and enjoy the body heat he gave off. Knowing he was there calmed you. Your head grew heavy as you just gently placed your head on his shoulder.

“She called me many things. Things that you should never call a child. So many of her words still haunt me to this day. No matter what meds I took, I would still hear them like they were said seconds ago. Back then, I dealt with the pain by hurting myself. There were so many times I felt like I deserved it. Times where I’d cry myself to sleep, yet nothing I did soothed the pain I felt inside. It was like this till I ran away.” 

“I lived on the streets here for a long time. I truly felt hopeless. Worthless. There were so many days where I thought about taking my life. I was an outsider who only spoke basic Japanese. An outsider without a quirk.”

“Can’t imagine how hard it would’ve been. Especially with how people treat the quirkless. You’re very strong for pulling through what you went through. It’s very admirable.”

“You're just saying that.” You joke.

“I mean it.” A smile spread on your face as your heart started to calm down. 

“By some grace of god, I managed to get off my feet. I had a crummy apartment and a crummy job, but I was still thankful. Even though I was thankful, I still felt so…empty? Sad? Numb? Whatever it was, I wouldn’t wish it on anyone. My job only paid enough for bills, so like in childhood, many nights I went to bed without eating.” You bite your lips as you try to stop it from trembling.

“I made some ‘friends’ at work, but they didn’t last long. They didn’t want to hang out with someone as sad as me. No matter the meds I took, I never felt complete. I felt like I was still missing something. It was like that until…”

“Until?”

“Until I met Kai. We were grabbing the same cleaning product, and we ended up talking. You know what happens after that.”

“Yeah. You really had him by the throat for a long time.” You both laugh at the memory.

“When I told Kai about my past, he said nothing. Only held my hands. I somehow managed to gather up all my courage to show my scars. I was so afraid. Afraid he’d find me disgusting. A freak, but he told me that my scars didn’t matter. That I was perfect to him. I remember crying. I fell so in love with him at that moment that I knew that he was the one I wanted to be with for the rest of my life.”

“My favorite teacup was the teacup that I was drinking from when he proposed to me. He didn’t get on his knees cause we were in the garden, but he asked me to dance with him. He asked me to marry him while we danced, and I still remember his tone that day. I thought right then that finally, after struggling for so many years, I was going to be happy.” Harsh tears spill down your face as those beautiful memories play through your mind. Pain that there was no longer a connection that used to be.

“I’m so thankful your still Kurono Hari. I don’t know what i’d do if you weren’t.” You heard a gulp come from the man next to you. The feeling of his hand being hesitantly placed on top of yours made your heart skip a beat. Yet, you made no effort to stop him when he intertwined his fingers with yours.

~~~

The day felt a little lighter than others. You didn’t know why, but it was like a breath of fresh air. Talking to Hari a week ago managed to lighten your chest, but there was only so much that talking could do.

He’s been checking up on you so much more than before. He’d tell you good morning and goodnight no matter if he was running late. He managed to make time in his hellish schedule to talk and see you. It brought a smile to your face every time. He turned into a small light that you looked forward to seeing every day. Despite the sadness that still ate away at you, you were happy you had him to talk to.

While you were no chef, you wanted to make him something as a thank you. Which led you to where you are now. Drinking out of your favorite teacup while baking cookies. You hoped he liked chocolate chip.

“Something smells good. What are you making?” Spinning your head, you see Gushiken walking up to you. 

“Chocolate chip cookies.”

“What’s the occasion?”

“For a friend. Hope he likes them cause they’re the only cookies I know I can make well.” You both laugh before continuing.

“How’d you get so good?”

“It was my brother's favorite. I didn’t make it often. But when I did I took my time to memorize it.”

“Wow. Lucky him to have a kind sister.”

“I was lucky if I got past the dough stage. He’d always eat it. I’ll never understand how he didn’t get salmonella.” Gushiken laughed.

“You’d be the same age as him. Sometimes I see him in you.” You laugh to avoid the ache in your chest. It was true. Something about him reminded you of your brother. It could be his unusually happy personality. How he’d talk about his interests with such excitement. Not to mention he had the same hair color as him. That being said, you felt a familiar gut feeling to protect. To make sure no one would hurt him. It’s been so long since you’ve felt it so strongly.

“My sister was like you too. Funny huh? When I first saw you I thought you were her! Then again, it was almost pitch black…” Laughing, you continue stirring the dough, almost finished.

“Can you grab me the cookie cutters? They're in the bottom left drawer.” Sending you a thumbs up, Gushiken went digging through the drawer. Grabbing some parchment paper and flour, you lay it on the counter so it's ready to cut the dough.

“Found them!”

“Great, now wash your hands. I won’t be able to cut cookies all by myself.” That was a lie. You’ve done it before, but something inside you spoke before you thought. Maybe it was the hole in your heart that your brother left, trying to heal itself. Somehow, without seeing his face, the smile he wore managed to repair a small part.

The sound of water running and the rolling pin doing its job echoed throughout the kitchen.

“Alright! I’m done!” Excitement was evident in Gushiken's voice as he stood in front of the flattened cookie dough.

“Okay, I need you to cut as much as you can. I lost track of time, and dinner will be late if I don’t start now.” Without being told twice, He got right to work.

“What are you making for dinner?”

“Kani salad with some fruits and whatever drink. It’s one of Overhaul’s favorites, so I’m hoping it will calm him down some.”

“I hope so too. I’ve got a mission he's putting me on tomorrow. A first real mission! Not some lame patrol thing or something that leaves me stuck in the base!” A twinge of panic hit your chest at his words. A ‘new recruit’ only being here for five months and being placed on a mission? You couldn’t help but be suspicious and extremely worried. Missions are usually reserved for people who have been here long and have shown their worth. A sinking feeling boiled in your gut.

“Oh? Wow. Not many people get to go on missions this early here…especially not with someone as young as yourself.” You try to hide the uneasiness you feel inside. He didn’t need to see you start panicking. Maybe overhaul got him mixed up with another recruit. He’d been extremely overloaded with stress recently, so maybe he got something mixed up.

“Really?! So he must think I'm doing a great job! That’s perfect!”

“Yeah…perfect.”

~~~

The uneasy feeling never left since you last talked to Gushiken. You desperately wanted to tell him that he shouldn’t take the mission. But, he seemed so determined to prove his worth that you didn’t have the heart in you to crush it in front of him. Plus, it was definitely a misunderstanding. No way Overhaul would put him on a mission so early. 

You haven’t seen Gushiken since your guys talk. Which would have been 5 days after today. It really bothered you not knowing how it went or how it was going. You wanted to ask Overhaul, but he'd probably say it was none of your business like always. Maybe you could ask Hari? That’s if you can catch him. He’s even more busy than he was before! He says good morning, passing by you and running to his next task. How he hasn’t collapsed you’ll never know. 

“(Y/N)?” The sound of the door opening made you look sit up from your bed. Hari stood outside with his mask hidden in his pocket. A distressed face looked back at you.

“Oh Hari! What do you need? You seem upset?” You go to get up only to be stopped mid-action.

“I think you should sit down.” With your brows furrowed, you look at him before slowly sitting back down.

“What's going on?” Closing the door behind him, he hid something behind his back. Continuing to hide it until he sat next to you on the bed. He sent you another sorrowful look before pulling out a familiar mask from behind his back.

“I’m sorry (Y/N), but he’s not coming back.” Handing you the mask that should have concealed the face of Gushiken.

“I-I don’t understand…Where is he? This has to be a joke. A sick joke right?” You looked at Hari pleading that what he was implying was a lie.

“Please tell me it’s a joke, Hari.”

“I’m sorry. He’s not coming home.” Your heart stopped as you looked at the man in front of you with wide eyes. Tears soon pour down your face like a facet as you grip the mask tight. Begging this to be a horrible nightmare. You couldn’t have another important person to you ripped away without a second thought. You should have told him how you felt, tell him not to go on that stupid mission. Now he was gone, and you failed to protect someone you cared about once more.

“(Y/N) there's a random man on the couch again. He’s scary.” The sound of your little brother's voice broke through your slumber.

“Really? Hmm.” You struggle to understand why your mother allowed another random man into her home. Into a home she shared with her two children.

“Here, you can sleep with me. Does that sound good?” You sent a small smile to your brother. Without being told twice, your brother got into your bed. You felt the covers shift as he scooted closer to you. A quiet sigh left your lips as you held him in your arms. Making sure that he felt safe.

“I’ll always protect you. I’ll never let anyone hurt you.” The moonlight shone through your shades, giving your room a comforting glow. A feeling as if you were shielded by the cruel world outside your bedroom door.

“I promise, that I’ll protect you till my dying breath. As long as I’m alive, you’ll never need to fear.”

“Where is Overhaul?”

~~~

The sound of his office door bursting open and hitting the wall caused his thoughts to escape. He looked at the entrance and saw a fuming woman with angry tears rolling down her face. Her body shook as hatred flooded her eyes.

“What the hell is wrong with you?!” His words only seemed to fuel her rage as she stomped up to his desk.

“I could say the same! How could you send someone so young to go on such a dangerous mission?!”

“Ah, you must be talking about that recruit-”

“Gushiken Taro! That was his name!” You grit your teeth at your husband's words.

“He was an expendable. We needed a distraction for the mission.”

“He was a someone! He wasn’t just some pawn! He was someone who had his whole life in front of him, only for you to sniff it out!” Slamming the boy's mask on the desk. Getting up from his desk, he looked at you with annoyance. Clearly, you were taking this loss to personally, and that mask you held didn’t help.

“Give me that mask. It’s making you unreasonably upset.” Your husband reached out, only for you to jerk it away quickly.

“Don’t touch it!” A frown was evident from behind his mask as he tried again, yet failing.

“Damnit (Y/N)! Give me that fucking mask!” Taking off his glove, you held the mask tighter to your chest. You weren't gonna let him take away the last thing you had left of him.

“Give. It. To. Me. Now!” With another reach, you move your body to cover the body. As soon as his fingers touched your skin, a searing pain hit you. Every nerve explodes with excruciating pain. It felt as if every cell in your body was being pulled apart. The pain felt so long, yet it could have only been a few seconds before you felt your body quickly being put back together. 

Your body hit the ground with a loud thud. You threw up from the sheer shock, and you could see a small amount of blood even through your teary vision. The mask you had just held dear right next to the door.

“(Y/N) I-I..”

“You…killed me…” You saw him move closer to you, but you scoot away in fear, your back hitting the wall in the process. 

“Don’t come near me! Get away!” You cried in terror as your heartbeat echoed in your ears. 

“(Y/N) Please, I-”

“You really are a monster.” The man above you looked at you in shock. His golden eyes showing more emotion than you’ve ever seen since your wedding with him. You stood up as you hugged the wall, trying to get as far away from him as possible.

“It was an accident (Y/N), I promise!” You only shook your head as you looked into his eyes. 

“For all these years, months, and days, I told myself that you were my cure. That someday, the love of my life would come back to me. That one day, Overhaul would die, and Kai would come back.” Your voice shaky as the air in the office felt poisonous.

“But now…I see that I was a fool. A pathetic, weak fool who held onto false hopes. Trying to pick up the pieces of promises that you broke as you destroyed anything that got in the way of your plan. Destroying everything that the man I once knew would never think of doing. Even through that, I stuck beside you. Because I remember you telling me you’d love me till your dying breath. I was a fool to believe you. I was a fool…for thinking anyone could fall in love with me.” Your body shook violently as you struggled to get air in your lungs.

“You're so cruel. Telling me lies. Calling me horrible names. Hurting me. I-”

“Please (Y/N) forgive me-”

“No. Not anymore. I hate you, Overhaul, and I hate you, Kai Chisaki. I wish I never met you.” Without another word, you grabbed the mask by the door and ran out of the office. Your footsteps echo in the halls, along with your sobs.

~~~

Gushiken's favorite place in the entire compound was the cherry blossom that stood in the backyard. He said that he’d go there to relieve stress from the work day. Saying the falling petals were his worries leaving him as he’d look up to the bright blue sky.

Knowing that, you decided to bury what was left of him right beside the trunk. That way, he will always be at his favorite spot. Watching the petals fall from the beautiful tree and looking up at the sky for eternity. You could even see the other pretty flowers you planted on his grave from on top of the compound roof. 

Hari was out on a mission before you were able to give him his letter. You poured the rest of the love you had to give into the letter. You supposed it was for the best. It makes things easier for him later. You hate to leave him without answers, but…

A shaky breath left your lips as tears poured down your face. The wind blew them off your cheeks with each breeze. Its cold bite attacking your skin as your hair flowed slightly through the wind. The faint smell of cherry blossoms in bloom surrounded you.

Looking up at the night sky, you see the moon watching you from above. With trembling legs, you moved closer to the edge of the compound roof. You simply wished to get a better look. You reached your hand out as if to touch the moon. A smile appears on your tear-ridden face.

“Finally. After all these years, I can be with you, my dear friend.” With a final exhale of breath, you step over the haunting edge of the roof. For once, a sense of peace embraced you as gravity played its part and pulled you back down to the ground.

The moon and stars shined brighter as they danced around the new star in the sky, the long awaited friend of the moon.

[tojiscumdumpster]

CHAPTER FIVE - READER

⠀ ⠀ ⠀⠀ ⠀ ⠀⠀ ⠀ ⠀⠀ ⠀ ⠀✧ summary page

content warnings - vanilla smut.

 I’m sober enough to be grateful that it’s Saturday, but I’m hungover enough to wish I didn’t drink so damn much last night. Four cocktails and eight shots? I’m surprised I’m not a corpse right now. My head is throbbing, and my body still feels too sluggish to get out of bed. 

 What time is it? Eight? Nine? Who knows? What I do know is that I’m going to take it slow today.

 But even though I have the biggest headache right now, I can’t deny that last night was probably the best sleep I’ve had in a while. 

 It felt warm. Safe, like I was being protected and cared for. And I know damn well Mr. Don Julio was not responsible for that. 

 When I get drunk, I can sometimes remember bits and pieces of what happened the night before, in the next morning. I know I was at a bachelorette party. I saw Toji—

 Wait, I saw Toji. We snuck away into the utility closet to make out like two horny college kids and talked. But he said something that hurt my feelings, causing my whole over drinking fiasco.

 Then, some random guy who was hard on the eyes started dancing with me. I can’t remember much after that, but I’m sure he was a creep.

 Realistically, I do need to get up to start my day. I have a couple of errands to run, and I sort of promised Nanami that we would meet for lunch later. Why? I don’t know. Again, I don’t hate him. It’s just… I don’t know. 

 But when I tried to get up from bed, I felt like I was being held down by an arm. Rough yet soft grumbles pass through ears that scatter goosebumps across my core. 

 In a way, they sound therapeutic. Though, I’m still skeptical about who’s in my bed because I don’t remember hooking up with anyone, let alone allowing someone to sleep over. 

 However, the moment I looked up to see those dark, mid-length, raven locks. The distinctive scar on his lip. His soft rose-colored lips, I broke from his embrace and jumped away from him. 

 Did I…

 “Toji?” 

 He barely stirs, but my voice is enough to wake him up. “Hm?” 

 My mouth waters at the sight of him, laying in my bed, wearing only a tank top that bare his biceps, but leaves me with questions because of the scars that accompany his beautiful skin. And his briefs that shows his toned thighs and— fuck . His semi-hard dick print. 

 I should look away, I should. But it’s hard when the man you’ve been fantasizing about for the past week is laying in your bed, looking like that. 

 “A picture will last longer,” he rasps. That deep fucking husky voice that sounds even sexier in the morning. 

 Y/N. Focus. 

 Heat floods under my cheeks as I look away. “What are you doing here?”

 “Last night really fucked you up, didn’t it?” 

 “I… Did we… Did we-”

 “Have sex?” He finishes for me, and I nod. “No. I wouldn’t do that to anyone… Not to you.” His last words were filled with softness that made my heart skip a beat. 

  Why am I so drawn to this man?

 Toji continues, “You’re pretty fucking clingy when you’re drunk, though. I took you home and cleaned you up for bed and I saw-” He stops mid-sentence, causing me to raise my brow in curiosity.

 “You saw what?” He sits up and turns away from me. I notice a light crimson color forming across his face and spreading to his ears. “Toji Fushiguro, are you blushing? What did you see?”

 “Just drop it.”

 “Nope,” I countered, jumping on him to get his attention back to me. I’m now playfully straddling his lap, completely oblivious. 

 It's like my hangover washed over me the second I knew Toji was in my presence. He was my serotonin, and I didn’t even realize. 

 “Aren’t you supposed to be hungover? Where the hell did all this energy come from?” He asks. 

 “Suddenly I’m not hungover anymore because I’m more interested in what you saw-”

 “Naked,” he interjects. “I saw you naked. When I was looking for your oversized tee shirts, you took off your dress while my back was turned and… yeah.”

 “Oh…”

 All the energy I had come to a halt while zeroing in on Toji. Me, still straddling his lap, becomes lost in his expensive emerald-colored hues. They’re so sharp. So pretty. Those soft lines, forming around his eyes that come with age, suits him well. But you wouldn’t even be able to tell he was forty-two because his skin is so smooth.

 His eyelashes are dark and medium length. Brows straight and thin. Lips rosy and slightly plumped. Toji, who claims to be an indecent man, appears like a beautiful catalyst to me. 

 It’s true what he says about us barely knowing each other, even though it doesn’t feel like that because in such little time, my life feels safe with him. 

 “Y/N,” he whispers. He calls for me and when he does, I feel his erection growing against my pussy. 

 “I’m sorry.” I start to pull away, but he holds me in place.

 “It’ll go down. Don’t want you to feel pressured to have sex with me,” he assures.

 “Okay… what if I—” I begin rubbing my sex against his dick. 

 “Y/N.” This time his voice is hoarse when he says my name.

 My pace quickens and the added friction of his briefs acting as a barrier brings me more pleasure than I expected. I lick and kiss all over his neck to hear more of his husky groans. 

 “Tell me if you want me to stop, Toji,” I say barely above a whisper. “Do you want me to?”

 He grabs my hips and rolls me on him faster. “Fuck no.” 

 It’s not sex, but fuck, this feels so good. The material of his briefs has me feeling Toji like he is bare under me. Dry humping might be a virgin thing to do, however, it’s aiding me in a much needed orgasm. 

 I take one of Toji’s hands to hike up my shirt and squeeze my nipples, having me arch my back in pure bliss. He’s just so hard. I’m very tempted to pull him out and ride his dick, but I’m not ready for that yet. 

 Our moans continue to mingle the quicker we chase our release, and I feel myself soaking up his briefs. Embarrassment fills my emotions from how needy I sound, along with my whimpering. Toji forces our lips together to devour all my sounds of pleasure, biting and sucking on my bottom lip that he can’t get enough of. 

 My sudden change of movements from grinding on his cock to bouncing and rolling seems to have an effect on him, just as much as it does to me. 

 “Fuck, you’re going to make me bust in my fucking boxers like I never had pussy before, Y/N,” he admits. “Keep doing that.”

 “Maybe because you never had mine.”

 Something about my words had Toji growling and flipping me over, where he’s now above me. The look in his eyes is almost primal. No. It is primal. Hungry, craving to feast on me until I tap out. 

 Before I protest from his loss touch, his lips are back on me, and he dry fucks me as if he’s actually inside of my pussy. His hips snaps into mine while dragging his mouth across my face and neck. Toji continues to pinch my nipples underneath my shirt and I'm a whining mess. 

 “Toji, I’m about to come,” I cry. 

 “Why do you sound so fucking sweet? How are you going to sound when my cock is actually inside of you?” Too many questions where I’m too horny to form an answer. “You think you could take me, pretty girl?”

 “Yes.”

 He chuckles, showing mockery to my answer. “We’ll see.”

 Why did that laugh, those two words, trigger me to come? It hit me hard, and blurred my vision with the tears that pricked my eyes. Toji’s presence was enough serotonin, but this? Nothing or no one could possibly ruin my day after this. 

 I softly gasp for air and it’s as if he knew to kiss me with such eagerness to breathe all the life back into me. Holding him tightly, I wrap my legs around his waist to take his thrusts and swallow his harsh grunts. 

 “About to fucking come, Y/N,” he growls. 

 “So come.”

 He gives me a few more dry thrusts until the bed creaks and the headboard hits the wall before coming in his briefs. 

 Toji gives me a sloppy kiss, overpowering, and not giving me a chance to keep up with his moments. Coming down from our orgasms together is an experience I never expected to happen so soon, but it felt right to do it now. 

 I’m completely sober to remember this moment with Toji. 

 Our breaths are shallow and his forehead rests on mine. Soon, he slowly rises from me to look at the mess we, well, I made on his briefs.

 They’re drenched. While he pulls apart a string of my wetness connects to him that makes my cheeks warm and causes me to look away. I know I shouldn’t be embarrassed, but I am. 

 “You’re so… fucking wet.” His deep and raspy voice soothes me. I feel his hand grasping my chin to turn my face to him. “Beautiful.”

 “Not into the lovey dovey shit, huh?” I say, repeating the words he said to me last night. 

 He scratches the back of his neck. “Sorry about that. I didn’t mean to hurt your feelings. What you said was right, wanting to scare people away and shit.”

 I don’t want to interrupt his thoughts so I nod my head so he can continue.

 “I’m not good at relationships. Only been in one and, well… you know how that ended.”

 I stand on my knees to level with his eyes. “I’m not asking for a relationship from you. Not now, at least. Let’s just get to know each other.”

 He looks at me to consider my request, eyes wavering across my face. His hand goes to spring the tendril in my face, and I remember to curse myself later for now putting on my bonnet. 

 Toji takes his time to caress my face, line out my jaw, cuff my neck, and trace my collarbone. His touch is delicate yet burns through my skin. If I can feel this all day, I know I would be okay. 

 “Alright.”

 “Alright?” I repeat.

 He nods, giving me a half smile. “Alright.”

 Again, my arms are around his neck, and I pull him into a kiss for a few more minutes before I head out for the day. 

 Having lunch with my ex-fiancé, who is also my boss, is not how I wanted to spend my afternoon, but here I am anyway.

 After I spoke to Nanami this past Monday about potentially having dinner with him last night, it completely slipped my mind that I had a bachelorette party to attend. I’m rushing at five in the evening to grade tests for six different classes because my free period was used for a parent-teacher conference, and here comes Nanami coming in my classroom to see if we can still go to dinner. 

 I was honestly shocked that he had the nerve to ask me that question, like I want to spend my weekend grading papers. Unlike him, I like to enjoy my only two days off without thinking about work. 

 But when it comes to him? I’m sure he expected me to drop everything and accompany him to dinner. 

 Nanami stopped doing that for me, so why would I do that for him? 

 Anyways. 

 Because I wanted to see why he was so eager to talk to me, I decided to allow him to take me out to lunch today so we could talk. To see how things are going. His words, not mine.

 “How was the bachelorette party?” He queries, pulling me from my thoughts. 

 I sip on my sparkling water. “It was fun. Had too many drinks. So, I still feel a bit sluggish.”

 “I see. I know the martinis here are your favorite. Too bad you can’t drink any.”

 “Not unless you want me to puke everywhere.”

 Silence. 

 This is exactly what I was worried about. Is this why Nanami wanted to meet up? To have awkwardness while eating eggs and waffles? The chemistry. The love, at least, the love I had for him, died. A long time ago. This feels trivial. 

 “You brought me to one of the restaurants we used to go to together, you ordered my entire meal because you know me ever so well, and now we’re struggling to make small talk.” I come in hard with my accusations. “What did you want to talk about?”

 “I want us to try to make things work, Y/N.”

 I laugh. “That’s not happening. We tried twice. How many times do you need?”

 “Now? Just one. I know I haven’t been the best in our relationship, but these months without you made me realize there’s more important things in life,” he explains. “Memories. Marriage. Parenthood… I eventually want to build that with you if you allow me.”

 “If I allow you?” I mock. “That’s the thing, Ken. I never was opposed to any of that. You knew how much getting married and becoming a mother meant to me. I didn’t take away from you. You took that away from us.” 

 “I’m sorry.”

 I scoff. “Sorry for what? For staying late at work? For declining me sex? For having me to go to our friends get togethers alone? What exactly are you sorry for?”

 I attack Nanami with all these questions because it honestly fucking amazes me that he invited me to lunch to try to convince me to give another chance. 

 We were together for five years. Engaged for one. Problems began two years prior. I’ve been more than patient with Nanami. I was the only person to actually understand how he feels because I’m a freaking teacher. Work is hard on me, too. 

 But the difference is, I know how to keep it at school. Yeah, maybe I have my days when I have to grade at home. However, when it came to Nanami? I dropped the world for him…

 Why couldn’t he do that for me?

 I’m not going to cry over him in front of him. Not here. Not now, so this lunch needs to be cut short. 

 “I’m sure you’re sorry, Kento. Actually, I know you are,” I tell him. “I can’t act like we didn't share some amazing memories. The love you had for me when you were in our relationship was beautiful. You made me light.”

 “I still lov-”

 “But you also hurt me—badly.” I gather my things to leave him at the table, but before I do. I say one more thing to him. “I don’t think I forgave you yet. If you want to be friends, cool. Give me time for that. But romantically? There’s no chance for that anymore.”

 Nanami’s hand sits in lap, and if I know him like I think I do, they’re probably balled up in fists. I know his anger isn’t directed toward me, but at the reality of our demise. 

 “Okay… I understand. I’ll give you time, Y/N.”

 “Thank you.” I give him a solemn smile. “See you around, Ken. Take care of yourself.”

PREVIOUS CHAPTER | NEXT CHAPTER

discussion question #1 — we see both reader and toji becoming familiar with each other, and trying to figure out why they don't feel like strangers. based on their interactions, who do you think will fall in love first?

[unclewaynemunson]

Jumping on the Eddie’s-face-scar-bandwagon brought up by @little2nerdy in this post and carried on by @stevesbipanic in this post (TW for scar-related body image issues)

‘What’re you doing?’

Steve sees in the mirror how the door opens and Eddie walks into the room, sees how a frown appears on the guy’s face when he sees Steve standing there.

Because that’s all he is doing: he’s just standing there, in front of the mirror. Has been for probably ten minutes on end. Staring at himself. At the swollen skin around his neck, the red chunks of flesh in his sides, the claw mark on his shoulder that Steve knows stretches all the way over his back, where he can’t see it anymore.

‘Just lookin’,’ he says in response to Eddie’s question, still not really present with his thoughts, lost in painful reminiscence of what he once used to see when he looked in the mirror, before his whole upper body was torn apart and he got almost eaten alive in another dimension.

‘Don’t,’ Eddie simply says, his reflection enhancing in the mirror as he walks closer towards Steve.

Steve holds Eddie’s gaze through the mirror glass.

‘Sometimes I don’t even know who that dude is anymore,’ he confesses. ‘I hate it.’

‘You’re still hot as fuck,’ Eddie replies with a teasing smile around his lips.

They’ve been doing that for a while now, shooting all kinds of flirty remarks back and forth between the two of them. Usually, Eddie’s words easily set Steve on fire, but this time, he only scoffs in reaction.

He turns around to grab his turtleneck - a replacement for the once well-loved polos that accentuated body parts he can’t get himself to be proud of anymore - but Eddie takes his wrist to stop him.

‘I’m serious, man,’ Eddie says, the flirty smile replaced by something entirely different: an earnest look in his big eyes and a light shade of pink spreading over his cheeks.

But Steve shakes his head. He can’t do this, not after ten whole minutes of staring at himself in the mirror, taking in all the parts of himself that have been damaged beyond repair.

‘No need to lie to me, man,’ he says. ‘I’m fucking deformed or whatever.’

One of Eddie’s eyebrows arches up, disappearing underneath his messy bangs. ‘Deformed?’ he repeats.

‘I hate how I look now. It’s disgusting.’

And there’s this look in Eddie’s eyes, as if he’s trying not to tear up right there on the spot.

‘Don’t talk about yourself like that, Stevie,’ he says, softly. Then, he abruptly releases Steve’s wrist and, in a quick motion, pulls his own shirt over his head and oh. Now they’re standing there, in front of each other, shirtless, Eddie is shirtless, and Steve’s thoughts are getting increasingly incoherent with each passing millisecond.

‘You think this is ugly?’ Eddie asks, gesturing at his own chest, a weird kind of urgency to his voice. An entire color palette is blooming all over his pale skin: black tattoos, half eaten away and replaced by pink scars and teeth imprints, white lines of wobbly scar tissue, red claw marks, the green and yellow of almost-faded bruises, all crossing over each other and merging together like an intricate private landscape...

Steve shakes his head. No, he would never call any of that ugly. It shows bravery, it shows pain, it shows persistence - and yes, he has to admit, it’s kind of hot, too, somehow. It’s like a living work of art.

‘You think this looks disgusting?’ Eddie points towards his face now, to the big scar that’s stretched out on his cheek, across the corner of his mouth and over part of his chin. The scar that changed his whole face, his every expression - but that in no way took away the softness of his smiles.

Steve feels the overwhelming urge to press a kiss onto that scar in order to show Eddie exactly how much he does not think it looks disgusting. It’s the opposite of disgusting, really. It’s Eddie. A new kind of Eddie, but still Eddie. Changed but still the same. And he understands what Eddie is trying to tell him, now.

So he does it. He doesn’t even think about it, he just takes a single step forward and presses his lips to that scar, gently, as his left hand tangles itself into Eddie’s curls where he lets it rest against the side of Eddie’s neck.

He hears how Eddie’s breath catches, how something between an Oh! and a gasp escapes from his lips.

‘I can’t think of anything that looks further from disgusting,’ he mumbles against the damaged skin of Eddie’s cheek. And he means it.

[conron]

leon & ashley fic

hi hi! i love you leon kennedy thank god for him amirite? this is a platonic fic which i feel like tumblr needs more of lol (u guys r lowk freaks haha....) i see their relationship very brother sister coded so thats how i will write them.

tags: OG RE4 ASHLEY AND LEON!, although it probably wont change much if youve only seen the remake, dont let that stop you!, post re4, ashley is a cutie, re6 section at the end, I RETCONNED IT A BIT, the president in re6 is graham here, dont judge me, i didnt realize ok, out of character im sure, typos, bit of a character study on leon, religion mention!, hugs !!!, villain and violent, infant and innocent

not beta read we die like....... resident evil side charracters....?

...

Her hands have a box in between her manicured nails. They’re clear but groomed to perfection and he looks from the box to her face. He’s…. a little confused. 

“It’s not my birthday,” He chimes in with a light smirk tugging at his lips. Brown eyes roll at him and his shitty one liner before she takes one of his hands in hers. They’re soft to the touch against his rough and calloused ones. Untouched and the scars from being kidnapped slowly fading to the back of her mind. He can see the metal banded bracelet adorning her wrist that he had to see every time he pulled her along when she was too scared to move. Turning his wrist so his palm faced up, she placed the box in his hand. 

“I don’t even know when your birthday is,” Her voice is unamused and it makes a grin be pulled to his lips. And she sure as hell won’t be finding out now. 

It was something that seemed a little too delicate for his hands that held grenade launchers and rifles. A box from plush hands that have scraped by with death from the minds of evil people. 

“It’s a gift,” Her voice says with a small smile. The same one she’d give when grinning at him when he shot down another B.O.W, “for saving me.” 

It makes his eyes widen as he looks down at the box. It’s black and wrapped in velvet on every facet of it. Her hand leaves his and the warmth of someone who’s less scarred than he is leaves his touch. He looks back up at her with something growing in his chest. 

“You… you really didn’t have to, Ashley.” Muttering under his breath as the wind blows past them. The leaves from the trees are changing seasons and falling around them. He can hear the sound of other people her age conversing about college and he finds that he can’t remember how it feels to be that young anymore. 

“It’s my job. Getting you home safe is the only thing that matters.” He continues as he tries to give back the gift. She’s the president’s daughter, of course he had to save her. So she doesn’t need to repay him because that already came in his paycheck. The repayance was bucking her off the jetski for a little laugh when he knew they were safe. 

Of course, she doesn’t accept this. Because this is Ashley Graham. Brown eyes and short platinum blonde hair. Invisible freckles across her cheeks and nose. The girl who would yell out his name every time something went wrong. Who never failed to comply with his orders so she stayed alive. Who wrapped her arms around him every time they found one another again. 

Of course, because she’s a young woman who’s so stubborn that she got kidnapped again when he saved her. 

“Come on, Leon.” A sigh leaves her lips and he quirks a small grin at her annoyance. “You saved my life like 3 times.” 

… 

That was very true. Actually, he’d argue that it was more times than that. But he doesn’t speak these thoughts to the woman, lest she start to strangle him in aggravation. His eyes look back from hers and stare down at the box again. His fingertips slowly grazing the felt, she laughed and said-

“Well at least open it. I’m making you take it no matter what.”

He scoffs slightly to the air, a little laugh hiding under it. His fingerless gloves cover most of his hand but he can still feel the soft felt. Creasing underneath the pressure as he slowly opens the box. His eyes are greeted with a necklace. Glittering shiny to his eyes and he already knows it has to be the most expensive thing he owns now. 

That isn’t the only thing that catches his eye. Planted in the box, the base holding it as if it was shaped for it. It was a shining cross. The actual cross was a bit small, about the size of half his pinky. It was encrusted with white gems that he’s sure, individually, would be enough to buy a house in this economy. The chain is secure and if he pulled, even with all his strength, he knew it wouldn't break. 

His head turns back up to meet Ashley's smiling face. She stands in her school uniform, her sweater vest pulled taut around her body. An orange scarf adoring her neck as well. 

“Well? What do you think, Leon?”

…

He stays quiet as he looks back down at the necklace. The cross adorns the corner of his eye as the gems glitter secrets into his ears. 

“I’m sorry, I’m not religious.”

Ashley’s eyes turn to ones of confusion before her hands place on her hips. She seems annoyed with him, something he was accustomed to for the few grueling days in Spain. 

“That is not what it’s about, Leon.”

“Then what’s the summary? Two sticks and a chain?”

She rolls her eyes again. It’s not that religion is really a problem, he mostly just wants to mess with her a little. Although, after being kidnapped by a religious group and infected with a virus that made her cough up blood; he’s surprised she’s still religious. 

From under her scarf, she holds up her own necklace. Glimmering under her soft smile at him. 

“Look, we’re matching.” 

She flashes a toothy smile at him as the necklace that is almost one to one with his swings from side to side. And suddenly he feels oddly shy. He was used to orders he had to follow and guns that made his hands shake when he held them for too long.  A little out of his depth for a gift that obviously had a lot of thought put into it. 

(And a lot of money…)

“C’mon Ashley, I can’t accept this…” He mutters as he closes the box, hiding away the innocent gift that he knows he doesn’t really deserve. Not really. Not when it was just his job that he saved her. Not when she got hurt under his watch, snatched away from his grasp over and over again. Forced to be kept away in cramped spaces with eyes of disgusting people staring at her. 

He doesn’t deserve this when she went through all of that. 

He doesn’t deserve a lot of things anymore. 

Not really. 

But her dainty hands cover his. Warmth blooming from her fingertips and watering his cold and rough ones. He looks from the box to her face and the way she smiled softly looking at his gloved hands. Something very soft in front of him. Something he’s afraid he doesn’t understand anymore. 

“When I was kidnapped, I prayed for God to save me. I’m pretty sure my nails made my hands bleed because of how hard I was praying.” The light wind carries her voice to his attentive ears. And her hands may be smaller than his and softer, but they grip his tightly. Sure of herself.

“And God didn’t save me.” She mutters, a little bitterly. Her smile turned downward at her own words. Gritting her teeth before she remembers something. As if something quelled the frustration at her disillusion with her own religion. A smile replaced her lips as she looked up at him. 

“But you did.” 

He feels his heart tremble and shake in the hands of a woman who was 7 years younger than him. Eyes who have not seen the extent of bioterrorism nightmares. Eyes that have been kidnapped and traumatized in their own way. Her smile, he feels, is undeserved. Something so grateful and sweet. HIs eyes widen slightly and he can’t even open his mouth to say a retort. 

“You did… and like-! I get how stupid that sounds…” She trails off as she looks away, her hands start shaking with the same tremor his heart is feeling and he feels a sudden urge to wrap her in his arms. 

“But I was so scared, Leon… I thought… I was gonna die alone. Or you know…” Her voice leaves empty to the possibilities that could have happened. The possibility that every woman was afraid of happening to her. She didn’t know she was supposed to be released back to America like some lab experiment. She didn’t know anything. 

The brown in her eyes swirl with tears before she stares at their hands that are on top of one another. Her lips not moving as she’s sure she doesn’t need to say more. Not needing to. Not when he understands so thoroughly. Those big brown eyes softening as she slowly descends to one knee. Bowing her head down with a little giggle. His lips cannot muster a smile at her. Only stares with a certain sadness in his eyes. 

“Thank you, Leon.” 

Her voice says through the wind and the blowing leaves. They blow past her face and get a little tangled in her short platinum blonde hair. Her smile makes her eyes crinkle, her teeth flashing white up at him. She looks younger than she really is, childish and grinning up at him as if she was a little kid. His lips purse a frown. 

“You’re my hero.” 

Her hand clutches his as he stands before her, forcing his fingers to curl around the box. On her knee as if she was a knight bowing to the royalty she was sent to protect. Switching the roles they were in when they were trapped in Spain. The setting sun glowing a brilliant golden on her visible freckles as he stares down at her. His own eyes drowning in a feeling that makes his chest ache and ache. 

When she stands, she rubs the back of her neck and laughs about how that was a little embarrassing. The moment has passed but it leaves a dull ache in his body that he hides with a cross of his arms. Rolling his eyes as he mutters, “think about how I feel…” 

This makes her roll her eyes as well as she knocks her hand against his arm. He hides his mixed emotions behind a small snarky smile as they walk next to the trees at her university. Their shoes crunching on the grass and leaves as her voice complains about menial things. He listens, of course he does. With his gloved fingers tucked within his pockets and small comments replying to her words. 

And when it’s been long enough, they stop and she smiles at him. A smile he’s familiar with. They hug and she smells like apples and cinnamon sugar. Her hair smells like the season as the strands tickle the side of his face.

He smells like mint and sweat, a small lingering scent of alcohol that she smells. It’s inevitable as she buries her face in his chest where he’s wearing his jacket. She laughs, looks up at him and says he's nasty, that he reeks of sweat and alcohol. An over exaggeration of course. This rolls right off of him as he reminds her that she jumped down a trash chute with him. 

And they laugh, carefree with no looming threat of death over them. Not concerned with saving their lives. He messes with her hair and he knocks away the hand that tries to mess up his. He bids her goodbye when she sees her friends. Her face glowing as she gives him one more hug and he smiles ruefully as she runs to her friends in the same big brown boots she was wearing when he saved her. 

For a moment, he allows himself to watch her walk away. Surrounded by people who care about her and that are making her roll her eyes at the moment. She gives one last look to him before she grins and gives a little wave at him.

He stands alone, the wind blowing through his hair as his own hand raises to give his own half hearted wave at her. Her friends sneak glances at him, poking at her side. She rolls her eyes as she turns away and walks away from where he can protect her. They disappear and he lets out a sigh as he stares up at the swirling colors of the sky. The small velvet box tucked away safely in his jacket pocket. 

When he gets home and sits at his desk, it is only then he really looks at the necklace. Sinking into the plush material as his fingers hold up the cross. Matching with hers. His, now that he really looks at it, is a bit darker. Has a bit more intricate designs around the cross. A little bigger than hers. His eyebrows furrow as he holds it in his hand and wonders what to do. 

He wonders if he should give it back or maybe donate it, it would definitely be a great idea for his financial situation. But then he thinks back to her grinning up at him and he feels a sharp pain in his chest. She decided to get him this and he was thinking about throwing it away? She got him this to show how grateful she was for him. Something he was not used to at all. 

(And he cares about her.) 

So he takes it with grace because Ashley Graham is one of the only people he can really really care about. He lost contact with Manuela a long time ago and Sherry is lost to the years, he can’t afford thinking about her. He took that risk to protect her, working with the government. 

Putting himself through that torture that he despised so heavily.

His job was too unforgiving for such luxuries to think about such things though. To love people he can’t even lay eyes upon. To focus on people who are no longer in his life. 

So he clasps the reliable chain around his neck and he feels the responsibility he feels materialize on his neck. It does not pull him down or drown him though, secure around his neck. Settling on his chest as he sighs once again and clutches at the cross. Closing his eyes as he fingers with the diamonds and gems that cover it. Encrusting it with magic that suffices to drive his every movement. 

He treats it gently at first, taking it off to shower and leaving it at home when he’s assigned missions. Though, he ends up just wearing it everywhere. Too exhausted to remove it one day and it stays when he showers. He’s worried it will rust but it doesn’t even when he wears it multiple times in the shower or when he works out. 

He texts her about it and she replies a few hours later, “that’s what you get when you’re the president’s daughter!” with a touch too many emoticons. He smiles down at his phone as his other hand fidgets with the necklace. Okay, he’ll wear it everywhere if he can then. 

So he does. 

Tucked under his shirt on assignment, away from hands that will rip it off of him. Out in the open when he goes to work, even being asked by one of his co-workers if he’s religious. His eyes are pulled down to the necklace that he received two years before. By a woman who’s 22 now, who’s going to graduate college soon and threatened him if he didn’t attend. He lamely shrugs at the co-worker he cannot even remember the name of and replies that he isn’t, turning away and leaving the office. 

The president sometimes sees the necklace when Leon forgets to tuck it away and Leon schools his poker face when the president is staring at him. His hands getting clammy from being folded in front of him, assigned to bodyguard during a dinner party the aging man was at. 

“My daughter has a similar one.” The man says with a kind smile as he looks at Leon and his stony expression. His eyes crinkle with understanding and Leon feels the suspicion crawling up his back that he knows who really paid for it. Finally, the president turned away from the man who was standing still behind his chair at the dinner party. Leon lets out a silent relieved breath as he carefully reaches up to tuck the necklace away from view. 

More years pass and he drinks more, keeping a flask in his jacket pocket for emergencies. Ashley sees him sneak a sip at her graduation and she pulls on his cheek with her manicured nails. She’s unimpressed and the regular look, concerned for him. He quirks up a smile as he puts it away. His eyes seeing her in her graduation gown and cap, her face seems to have aged a little more. Still baby faced though and its something that has him let out a little laugh. 

He’s 29 now, a little more jaded. A little more tired. She eyes the bags under his eyes as she waves over her photographer. He scoffs a little at the fact she has her own photographer at the graduation and raises his eyebrow.

His hands resting inside the new leather jacket he bought, sweating a little because of the sun above them. Spring seems to suit Ashley just as well as fall did. Her face gleaming as she tells the photographer to take a picture of them. 

She passes her diploma to one of her other bodyguards and gives Leon a mischievous smile. Before he can quip at her, she unzips his jacket and reaches over the collar of his button up. Her fingers pulling a cross necklace from under his shirt, something that glitters under the sun. Her laugh is overpowering as she smiles up at him. 

“You’re wearing it!” She says, as if she was surprised. He doesn’t know why she is. Of course he has it on.

(He doesn’t tell her that he wears it everyday. That he fidgets with it when he’s nervous. That when everything gets a little difficult, he clasps onto it tight and remembers every reason to do what he does.) 

“Don’t have any other jewelry,” He says with an easy going smirk, hiding the emotional attachment he has for the gift given to him two years before. Although it was true, he really doesn’t have any other jewelry. This makes her roll her eyes as she turns to the camera and reaches under the collar of her own gown. Pulling out the matching piece to his as his eyes widen. 

“Hold it up,” Her voice says as she turns to meet his eyes. Life in her eyes and a future head of her. His mind goes blank as he can only see Ashley in her gown and cap. Flickering to an orange sleeveless sweater and teary brown eyes. 

“Let’s take a picture!” She says before she mouths something to the photographer. But he doesn’t focus on that, a realization dawning on him as he watches her. Reaching up to clutch at the cross before bringing it up robotically. 

This is the life he saved. 

This is the future he protected. 

He has no other time to relent on this before she tells him to smile. So they stand side by side, her fingers holding hers up to the camera. He copies her before quirking up a lazy smile at the camera. A smile he’s practiced to perfection. 

The photographer takes the picture but for some reason doesn’t stop. His eyes swirl in confusion before he feels arms wrapped around him. Ashley’s cap has fallen to the ground as his eyes adjust to the weight on him. Her face buried in his chest as his eyes see the overgrown brunette roots of her platinum blonde hair he was used to. 

His arms automatically wrap around her as he scoffs out a smile. Genuine as Ashley stands wrapped around her. He doesn’t hear the flash and sound of the camera, too focused on the woman before him. Chuckling as he ruffles her hair, messing her hair up on the day of her graduation in the name of affection only he can give to her. 

A gasp resounds as she looks up at him, her face offended but her eyes relaxed and satisfied. He quickly steps out of her grasp before she can mess up his hair. He realizes he’s laughing as he picks up her cap and throws it lazily back on her head. She huffs as if she’s annoyed. 

They smile at each other as other graduates bustle around them, looking for their families. Loud as joy is in the air and the sun shines down on them. Eventually, she goes back to her friends and father. He follows behind as he is tasked with protecting the president and his daughter at this event. 

He doesn’t smile when he’s mailed blown up pictures of himself and Ashley a few weeks later. Definitely doesn’t clutch tight onto his matching cross when he sees the genuine smile on his face when the photographer captures her impromptu hug. He doesn’t frame them, why would he? 

And another thing, he does not cry when he comes home from an awful mission to clutch tight onto a framed picture of himself and a blonde woman holding up matching necklaces. 

So even if he’s not religious, he carries the worn out cross. Wearing it everywhere. Even though it’s lost precious gems and diamonds over the years because of overuse. Because Ashley got him it.

It was his one physical representation of his efforts. Medals meant nothing. Handshakes and fake smiles at ceremonies don't matter. Something he fiddles with in his down time means more than grandiose speeches stroking his ego. 

Something that reminds him of why he’s doing any of this.

I want to save people. 

He remembers his younger self saying as he curled up in a ball at his parent's funeral. 

He remembers being carried away by a man in a blue uniform, clinging onto the material. Hushed whispers trying to be kept from his ears and a strong voice telling him it’ll be okay. 

He thinks of people who have been in his arms. Smiling at him with tears and gratitude. Battered and having lost the air of innocence in their eyes.

He feels his heart constrict and want to wrap around these people. Holding tight to the only reality he knows and it’s protecting the not so innocent light in their eyes. 

Sure, people love to tell him that he likes playing the hero. They assume he loves feeling the praise of saving another human life.  He can only think of someone shivering and terrified. Scared that something out there will harm them.

It’s a cross that gives him solace in the neverending hardships of his career. To give him something to touch other than the cool material of another pistol. 

He may not believe in God but he believes in the lives that he saves. 

And when Helena and him stare down at the president’s dead body, her eyes turn to him as his breath picks up. His hand reaching into his shirt and clutching onto something she cannot see. His other hand searches for his phone as he clumsily clicks on it, the only words from his mouth come out ragged. Repeating a name that she’s heard before. 

He sounds terrified. 

(The only thing Helena can compare it to is when her sister got lost when she was younger. Helena searched for hours through tears, desperation seeped into every bone.) 

Ashley, Ashley, Ashley-