#or realistically they probably wouldn’t even acknowledge it at all
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ninjaaa-go · 1 year ago
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I was just thinking that, if we do actually get amnesiac Jay, him eventually getting his memories back could be really interesting. Because obviously you’ve got all the great memories with his family and the people he loves, but at the same time just— the horrors. The guy has so much trauma piled up from over the years and I feel like that would be A Lot to have dumped on you all at once.
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darlingshane · 2 months ago
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I’d love to hear your thoughts on why Shane is the best character in TWD 😊
Cause he's my baby and he's hot and I love him and that's good enough of a reason 😂 
But if you want something more logical, perhaps for a lot of reasons people tend to overlook… First, something that always bugs me is how little acknowledge there is of him actually stepping into the role of a leader for months before Rick showed up. As far as I know, no one in that group stepped in like he did. For the few interactions we saw, everyone would come to him for answers, and while he wasn’t always very diplomatic, he had good survival instincts and kept the group safe for months. Perhaps staying at the quarry wouldn’t have worked in the long run, but it was a plan nonetheless. 
He was right most of the time. He figured out pretty quickly how things were after the infection, and adapted a new mindset. He had to make tough decisions nobody was ready for yet, and maybe he pushed too hard instead of giving people time to get into that same headspace. And we see in later seasons that almost everyone thinks in a similar way Shane did, they just have different approaches. 
and it keeps going under the cut...
I recently saw a timeline in a subreddit or somewhere else that said the events from season 1 and 2 happened in the span of 2 or 3 weeks and that's crazy to me. So they were seemingly doing good, and they found Rick, everyone automatically herd to him, and everything until that point didn’t really matter anymore. That really pisses me off that he was just killed a few weeks later because they couldn’t sit down and talk things over. All and that, and despite him being driven for his misplaced love for Lori, he was still loyal to Rick in his own way. Did he question Rick’s leadership? Yes, countless times. Did he also follow his lead every single time? Also yes.
Which leads me to my next point. He also kept Rick safe. In the hospital flashback, he went in and saw what was happening and amidst all the chaos he still tried to get him out. When he couldn't, he did the only thing he could, he locked the door and barricade it. Did he know that would keep him safe? Probably no. He had absolutely no idea, but he was driven by getting them all out, and when he couldn’t get him out, he did the best he could to get Lori and Carl out of town. If he hadn't lied about Rick, Lori wouldn’t have agreed to leave him behind. Again, tough situations led to hard decisions.
And one of the hardest decisions he made was killing Otis to save Carl. He didn’t murder him in cold blood, he was with him until the end, killing him wasn’t something that crossed his mind until the very last second when he had no choice. If he hadn’t, Carl wouldn’t have gotten the care he needed. BUT people tend to paint him as a murderer for shooting him in the leg. It wasn’t right, but it was the only way out at that moment. I recently revisited one of my fics and wrote that Shane sacrificed his soul to saved Carl that day and I still agree with that. I don’t think he purposely hurt someone before unless he was defending himself. And from that moment on, you could see it changed him and didn’t know how to deal with that, which led him to his own demise.
Was he an asshole sometimes? Yes. Did he do or say things in a way I didn’t agree with? Yes. Did I ever want to slap him? Many times. But there was something about him, compared to other antagonists later on the show, that made him more realistic to me. He wasn’t driven by wanting to be right all the time or even being the leader. His misguided love for Carl and Lori, was at its core the things that he cared the most about and that he wanted to protect at all costs. And while I cared for neither, I think it was beautiful of him. 
I can never watch his last moments. For me, he got the right idea at the beginning of season 2 when started considering leaving the group on his own. I wish he had done that, even if that meant leaving the show. 
I’m probably forgetting something here cause I haven’t rewatched in years, but I think that’s it. Like I’ve said, I didn’t pay much attention to him the first time around, I did agree with him most of the time, it was his manners that left a lot to be desired. It wasn’t until my love for Frank got me to go back and watch some of his previous performances that I got to see Shane in a new light. 
In conclusion, he’s still the best character to me, and everyone should love him like I do. Or not. More Shane for me if you don’t. 
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kimsmuse · 1 year ago
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yandere childhood friend ♡ !!
gender neutral!reader. 1.7k words. warnings for irrational obsession for the reader. i'm not sure what it is but the guy is very, very delusional. i'm not sure what to think of this piece, but this one goes out for 🤏🍷anon, i loved the yandere drummer you drew so much so i hope you like this :) !!
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“here,” you bring the flower to his face but he’s still annoyed. lately, he’s annoyed by almost everything, was teenage so bad? you wouldn’t know yet. your best friend is almost 2 years older than you and only holds the position because you've been practically be forced to get along with each other, courtesy of your family being great friends.
he scrunches up his face. “i'm allergic, you should know that.” he responds, not even looking up from his homework. “make me a paper bouquet, then we’ll see.”
the first time you realized that you liked your bestfriend was the first time that he realized that romance was not his cup of tea and with you? no way in hell. he hated the idea of cheesy romcoms and pop songs, it disgusted him and he made a point of making it obvious.
but you were young, just about 12 or something, and he was the only one close enough to fantasise about, so you did - doodled hearts around his initials and yours, “2gether 4ever ♡” and made it so obvious to the adults around you that they often teased you about it, much to your friend’s dismay.
and the crush was so strong that the moment you went home, you were on youtube, looking for ways to make a paper flower, and then piecing it all together.
“bed time, now,” your mother calls out and you proudly show off your paper bouquet to her, “is that for him?” she asks, amused at your efforts to be seen by your crush. you nod.
“aw, baby, as much as i love his mother as my bestfriend, that kid doesn’t deserve you,” she kisses your forehead.
yes, there were times when it felt like your heart was breaking into pieces or however those songs called it, when you saw him around school hanging out with other girls and not even acknowledging your presence. but when you went home and he excitedly told you about the new game he was playing, you fell all over again. besides, this is what happened in the music videos, right? there will be a day when he sees you like that too, when he’ll be long over this phase of shouting “ew, ew, ew,” when his parents kiss and be a more mature guy.
you did think that. but it was always in such a future tense that it never seemed realistic enough, it seemed far, far away. and when you actually reached that time period, your family had to move away, dad got a job somewhere else.
so you left that paper bouquet, (which quite frankly you didn’t have the courage to give it to him in fear that he might mock you that he told you to make it for him and you did? what a fool…) and a letter detailing your feelings for him.
but obviously it didn’t hold much depth, as you can imagine, a preteen detailing their infatuation.
but long after you were gone, your friend started to do something which he never thought he would do, ever. he was missing you.
he missed you when he came home from school and there was no one to talk to, or no one to taunt about how much he hated a particular thing and not have you judge him. it was just so awesome on how you had never judged him for anything, because he was sure if he kept on repeating on how much he hated taylor swift to some other girl in his grade, she'd probably have flipped him off, even if she, herself hated her. that was the level of repetitive he could get.
but he missed you, making those random cakes with your mother and you ran down to him to make him taste it first and he acted disgusted. “this is the worst, did you put in salt instead of sugar?” and you still had a smile on your face when you answered. “no, i just tasted it.”
he fiddled with the paper bouquet you left him for a long while after that, thinking about that afternoon and many others like that again and again. he could just… call you but his ego wouldn’t let him. and he was so disappointed over the fact that you were talking to his mother almost every other day, but you never asked for him?
it was hurtful.
but he couldn’t just ignore it. even when it was the only thing he wanted to do, ignore you, keep you out of his mind. but even when in high school he began going on dates and dances, he kept coming back to the paper flowers you left him.
he didn’t have any allergies. he was just messing with you. he never knew you'd actually do it. just like he never thought you'd actually leave, or that he'd ever miss you like this.
when he was out of the local college, he was sure that he was going to come to you, he knew the city where you lived through his parents' daily conversation at the dinner table. you were still in college, about an year or two remaining and he looked for jobs in your area.
when he found one, he was absolutely relieved. he told his parents it was one of the best opportunities in his career and it was, just not in his career, but it helped that the city you were in was quite famous and the job wasn’t bad either.
so when he finally takes your number from his mother and calls you.
he’s so delighted to hear your voice, even though it has changed a lot. and you’re happy too! you sound really happy when you say that you're excited to meet him.
and oh, you’re right, he never considered your angle on it, you must have missed him so much! oh, poor thing, the move must have been so harsh to you. maybe the reason you didn’t ask his mom to give him the call was because it'd simply hurt too much to talk to him without being near him. right? this had to be the only explanation.
so when he moves in and settles into his apwrtment, he calls you in the morning, and you give him a recommendation for a cafè nearby, “it’s a good one, i think you'll like it,”
see! you know him so well!
he arrives there a few minutes late, but you’re already there. oh, you still love him so well.
but midway through drinking overexpensive coffees and reminiscing the old times, he chokes on his drink.
he honestly thinks you’re kidding.
“what?” he wants you to repeat it again.
“i said, i’m not in love with you, my friend, i’ve moved on,”
the friend stings more than applying sanitizer on a cut, he swears. but it was just unbelievable, you were just running after him (not quite literally, pardon him, he’s a little delusional) begging for him (again, he’s delusional) to make him go on a date with you, with the last part being true. you did want him to go on a date with you, but you respected his decisions.
yes, you did have the worst and incredibly humiliating crush on your childhood friend, but it was just all that was in your opinion, a crush that started when you were 12 because he was the only one you hung out with and spent all your time with and so you were convinced, from ages 12 to 16 almost that this was the guy you’d marry and start a family with, you’d already picked out the names for them. but the problem was? he didn’t like you back.
your childhood friend had better things to do, like all teenage guys do, ofcourse, but he was always stuck with the feeling that he didn’t want you, he physically cringed when at joint dinner sometimes both of your parents would joke about you both dating, it was just something that was unimaginable for him at that point. only at that point though.
he was too busy going out on dates with random people, unbeknownst to how much he was hurting you (because in his defense, he was just a kid and he wasn’t quite sure how deep your feelings ran).
but now? why not now?
he had finally realized that it was you he liked, genuinely. And now you say this? It was absolutely heartless, did you not even stop to consider his feelings, even for once? Did the fact that you loved him before mean nothing to you?
“why don’t you love me anymore? or are you lying? to avenge your hopeless pining and me turning you away, is that it? please, talk to me. please.”
“it was a childhood crush, they eventually go away,” you don’t know what more he wants to say to you.
“but i… but you,”
“there are no but's here, if you came here looking for me because you’re realizing your feelings almost 8-9 years later then it's absurd because did you really think i would wait for you that long? i have a life now, i have a boyfriend and.. just grow up, you have a job here you should focus on that.”
you mentally made a note to stay the fuck away from this guy, because he was spewing some crazy, crazy shit. never in your wildest dreams did you ever think he would come back and be insistent on his feelings, it was all like a fever dream.
“am i that bad..?” he whispers softly, you look up at him, he has both of his hands on the table and his head hanging down. great, he's crying now. “i'm sorry i was so rude to you before.”
“look, it's fine, okay? we were both kids and i don't even hold it against you, i didn’t back then and i still don't. so go live your life and move on,”
you didn’t think you could bear to stay sitting there for a minute more, so you got up and went to the counter to pay and without a second glance, you left the cafè.
all the while, your childhood friend is still sitting there, not looking up.
“i.. i can’t do that,” and he looks up and wipes his tears, he didn’t come all the way here just to get disheartened so easily, did he?
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eerie-august · 7 days ago
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Theory time because I accidentally connected some dots (??) after reading E91 and I have no one to talk to about it —>
(No spoilers for fast pass, please if this theory is disproven in the next four episodes don’t spoil it)
Ever since episode 66 I have been wondering what exactly was the significance of Ashlyn’s dream, because the more you look at it the more obvious it becomes that it wasn’t a dream.
To sum up the episode:
After being drugged by Mr.Thomas, the next episode starts with Ashlyn being surrounded by her friends, most of which are playing video games. She falls asleep, and when she wakes up it’s dark and her friends are gone. She goes looking for them (acknowledging how strange the situation is) and finds them (including Logan) all inside a separate room. Before she can interact with them, a whisper catches her attention. She looks over to see a different Logan, one who is clearly hiding/peeking around a corner, warn her “that’s not us.” She looks back at her “friends,” all of which now have scary phantom faces. Then she wakes up in the lab in a panic and this “dream” is never mentioned again.
At first this comes off as a nightmare. Makes sense, Ashlyn was unconscious for a bit after a stressful event. Even the background of the chapter is grey and staticy, very indicative of a dream or flashback. However everything feels too linear, too real to be a dream. Ashlyn seems to be fully conscious, and a dream doesn’t explain why Logan specifically would be there to warn her about the phantom friends. I mean I love the guy but realistically if episode was completely irrelevant I fear he wouldn’t be in it.
Now I want to jump ahead to what Tyler and Aiden were talking about in E91. They both reveal they’ve been having dreams where a phantom version of themselves was trying to kill them.
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Coincidence? I sure hope not because that would ruin the theory.
If Aiden and Tyler have been experiencing these dreams because they died, then why would Ash be experiencing something similar?
To explain this I propose a theory: there is a hidden, dreamlike world in between the real world and the phantom dimension, which contains the phantomified versions of real people. Here they aren’t quite human, but not completely phantoms either. This is where Tyler and Aiden are going, and this is where Ash and Logan have visited. Why tho?
Before I go into that, I want to highlight some things said early on in E66.
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I think it’s safe to assume that the Logan who warns Ashlyn of her fake friends was the real Logan who was somehow in the dream with her.
And I suspect this wasn’t his first time in that realm, either. During their video game banter, Aiden complains of how good Logan is at the game. This doesn’t really matter, unless you take into account that fact that Logan supposedly hasn’t played before. The explanation? He has played it before.
Ashlyn does not realize her friends are phantoms, but Logan has (hence why he warns her from his hiding place). It appears that Logan has experienced this dream before, possibly so many times that he was able to master the “brand new” video game they were playing. It might work like a time loop, sending the kids though the same actions every time they visit.
Okay, so, if this is some third/subconscious dimension, then why are specifically Ashlyn and Logan the only ones experiencing this? I have a couple ideas:
1. It results after near-death or panic-inducing experience.
As far as we’re aware, Ashlyn only went to this “dimension” once, during the time she was being kidnapped. The drugs combined with her frantic fighting combined with her panic probably took a pretty big toll on her physical well being in addition to her mental. It makes sense that she might be in a weird headspace for a bit. As for Logan, I would like to point out that we are still missing crucial backstory details for his character. Maybe he experienced something when he was younger, or even at the start of the series that would cause him to go into panics resulting in dreaming about this “dimension.” Admittedly this theory has some problems.
- All of the kids have had many traumatizing experiences, why has Ashlyn only had this dream once?
- If Logan suffered from a traumatic event before being sucked into the rift in Savannah, why is he now experiencing this dream?
Theory 2: this dimension is where the kids go when they’re unconscious.
This one also has some major problems, but let me give the supporting evidence first. For starters, we’ve seen both Ash and Logan physically pass out within the Webtoon.
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Logan went night-night as early as E22, which gives him plenty of time to experience this dreamworld before Ash got there. I also want to point out that both of these occurrences were from actually passing out, and not just sleeping. If this theory is to work then it must be from forced unconsciousness. However the plotholes for this theory are strong.
- We also saw Ben and Taylor knocked out in the same episode as Ashlyn, and it doesn’t appear that they had the same dream.
- If Logan has had this dream enough times to memorize hidden crawlspaces in a game, then he probably needs to spend a lot of time unconscious. That’s not good for his brain
Theory 3: the dream occurs depending on damage sustained from the phantom dimension.
This one doesn’t explain why Ashlyn has only had this dream once and specifically during E66, but it does solve a few issues regarding the other’s lack of this dream.
As far as I’m aware, Ashlyn and Logan have been directly injured by phantoms while the others haven’t. I’m pretty sure. (I also want to point out that when being tested in the lab for a connection, Logan was the one chosen to be nicked by the phantom, continuing the pattern that he’s been hurt by them while others haven’t)
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Although not fatal, Logan sustained a pretty nasty scratch from a phantom in E22. It was so bad the scar existed in E32 and appeared in his shadow in E42. This implies it’s/he’s now heavily connected to the phantom dimension.
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Ashlyn was also scratched way back in E10, then again in E73. Both were minor but left a scar and occurred during emotionally charged times. I don’t understand why a scratch occurring in E10 could result in a dimension hop in E66, but it could work in combination with the other theories. Maybe by being injured by phantoms, Ash and Logan were both “marked” and introduced to this in between-world. Then in times of great emotional or physical stress they come back to this dream because the fabric between dimensions is thinning.
This is about the extent of my thoughts but I do think I’m onto something. Let me know of any additions or contradictions to this theory
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cripplecharacters · 4 months ago
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I want to write more disabled characters but my story takes place in the 60s… so far it hasn’t been an issue because the disabilities included would historically either be undiagnosed, kept secret, belong to characters already at the fringes of society, etc
I really want a specific character to have Down’s syndrome but it’s not the sort of story that would at all be benefited from the inclusion of an institution. For personal reasons, I don’t want to touch that. I’ve been writing him with just undiagnosed autism that’s left him socially outcast from his peers. The most extreme his ableism gets is being seen as the local weird girl (as he’s a closeted trans man)
The story is decently realistic for what the queer and intersex characters would experience, imagining doing the same for disability feels bad… at least, to the level of ableism someone with Down’s syndrome would experience. His parents are notably shitty, rich, and care more about their reputation than their kids so I don’t see a way he wouldn’t get that treatment.
Is there a way I can still write this or similar characters without delving into heavy ableism? What are your thoughts on historical stories that ignore or downplay historical ableism?
Thanks, @interroblog
Hello asker,
I'll start first with a small note: It's better to write Down Syndrome as opposed to the possessive Down's Syndrome, since John Langdon Down didn't have DS.
So, with this story there is one general concern:
It feels strange to depict period-accurate intersexism and transphobia and homophobia as core parts of the story, but downplaying ableism when it's as period-accurate as the other -isms. In this case, it can definitely feel like you're glossing over a very relevant part of history that would have been part of your story. Yes, queer and intersex people have faced some really difficult things and still do. But the same is true for disabled people. Ignoring this can feel revisionist.
If you're going for a very realistic story, but you don't want to write ableism at all, it is probably better to just skip the DS aspect. People with DS have faced some truly intense ableism throughout history (and they still do), as people who have intellectual disability and facial and physical differences, two things that lead to some pretty intense ableism from many, many people. It's fine to not do this if you're not comfortable writing ableism, but again, intense ableism was widespread and common.
However, if the only thing holding you back is institutionalization: Not every single person with Down Syndrome was institutionalized. Yes, it was very common, and would probably be thought about, suggested, and even encouraged. But not everyone institutionalized their children with DS, for various reasons.
If you want him to still have that type of parents, perhaps the reason they don't institutionalize him is in fact for the benefit of their reputation. Maybe they want to be seen as 'saintly' for raising a visibly disabled child or something – still shitty, still caring about their reputation more than their actual kids, like you intended; there is just a different outcome.
Now, to my personal thoughts on historical stories that ignore or downplay ableism, as someone who loves historical fiction: It depends on how historically accurate the story in general both is and aims to be. But I don't like stories that completely ignore ableism, especially the more realistic they aim to be. It feels like glossing over history. Even modern stories that completely ignore ableism I don't like. I still recognize that downplaying historical ableism can be a useful tool for authors, especially for disabled authors' own comfort. And, also, while ableism was very common in the past, it doesn't mean every disabled person ever always faced the worst possible ableism ever.
Basically: you, and other authors, can acknowledge historical ableism accurately without making it the main point and focus of the story. But if your focus is a story specifically about discrimination, which it seems like it is, it feels irresponsible to gloss over an extremely common and pervasive form of discrimination.
Hope this helps,
– mod sparrow
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oglyndwr · 20 days ago
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I have so many head canons and a dormant tumblr account let’s fix that
What I think the raven boys would major in in university also I go to the uni that Maggie Stiefvater went to so that means I’m right duh (warning I acknowledge canon but also do with it as I please. This is not by choice it just happens in my brain.):
Gansey: Two possibilities here,, I mean… History is one of the obvious ones but I think he’d do Historic Preservation then work in museum curation. This is if he follows his own whims. More likely he’d follow after his dad but he would absolutely not be doing poli sci I see that everywhere it’s wrong everyone knows they make no money and if he’s following his dad then he’d listen to his dad who would be saying no absolutely not poli sci majors are liberals. He’d be doing pre-law then go into politics. Probably go to law school also. Honestly he’s smart enough to ace law school while also doing his nerd glyndower shit ‘on the side’ so I lean more pre law. Sometimes.
Adam: honestly I think it depends where he goes. Definitely Ivy duh (although let’s be so fr even with a scholarship realistically he would never be able to afford that… fantasy to the max American higher education is fucked up). He’d do something conventionally difficult and lucrative because duh, and he’d choose whichever one of those programs the college he chooses is known for. I can see him doing pre law with gansey, biomed, applied math, or Econ. I despise Econ myself but surprisingly find myself imaging him in that program more so than the others (except maybe pre law with gansey) because of his history with money; I think it would make sense that he’d go into that field since he’s been financially conscious from such a young age. Plus it might make him feel like he has more control over his own financial situation (trauma symptom or trauma coping? Who knows)
Ronan: pretty sure Ronan canonically does not go to college. For these purposes I throw this fact to the wind. Obvious choice might be agricultural science but I also throw that in an incinerator this time. Ronan would feel like he learned everything there is to know about farming from Niall and refuse to listen to his professors if they say anything contradictory to what Niall’s taught him (but really he just doesn’t want to taint Niall’s memory. Bittersweet so Ronan). On the test he’d circle the answer the professor is looking for then write in “wrong.” With a lengthy description of some Blackwood method his dad taught him (that probably actually is more environmentally conscious and efficient) with every other word being an insult to the professor or profanities. Also if this is a world where his magic is still valid… absolutely no way he’s majoring in a hard science he doesn’t need it he has fucking magic. He can dream a forest he can dream a harvest he doesn’t need to know slash and burn or whatever the fuck. Other obvious choice would be classics or Latin (is Latin even a major?) and like… yeah but too duh to be interesting to me. There are a few options I like to entertain. I feel like when his parents were alive they all played trad Irish instruments/music together, and Ronan might major in music performance. This seems most realistic to me because he wouldn’t have to study all that much and since it correlates with his love for Niall he’d be less likely to refuse to practice/study/go to class out of spite if a professor pissed him off (which I feel like he’d do in any other discipline). I also think he’d have started really young so he might not even have to practice that much, but he’d still practice a lot bc like I said, his love for Niall would be translated into his love for the instrument. As for the instrument itself, I’d like to say Irish bagpipes but secretly I imagine it’s fiddle (def ooc tho). I also think he’d be well versed in all of the instruments like at least know the notes even if he would need sheets (I imagine he’d be able to play virtually anything by ear on his primary instrument) like Concertina, accordion, whistle (god imagine squash song on a fucking tin whistle… he’d do that bit so much and it would be 100x more insufferable), maybe flute, DEF spoons but mostly for bits, etc. I think he’d also learn banjo but he’d play more folksy Appalachian music on that. Another major might be civil/environmental engineering or some other applied science but like.. I just do not see him caring about learning the foundational stuff,, especially in a classroom setting. He’d want to know the stuff you need to know to do the actual work and none of the other foundational math, theory, conceptual shit. He’d fail the physics pre req because he wouldn’t open a textbook with a gun to his head and wouldn’t be able to recite the fundamental theorem of calculus. He’d probably even know it or at least how to apply it practically, he just wouldn’t have it memorized in those terms yk?? Anyway, final decision music performance.
Blue: I also don’t think blue went to college in canon and this makes sense to me. However, let’s say she did. I’m not very concrete in these headcanons but I’m thinking studio art, fashion design, or maybe poetry/creative writing as my primary inclinations. Secondary: sociology? I think she’d be into that and have a lot to say in those classes. She cares a lot. Maybe gender/sexuality studies but I just personally don’t like that one so even though I see it in her I choose not to acknowledge or engage. I can see journalism, she’s got a quick tongue and is very passionate about social issues buuuut I think she might be too adversarial to do interviews. Like as soon as the person she’s interviewing or whatever says something she doesn’t agree with she wouldn’t be able to wait to write the scathing piece she’d just flame them right then and there boom interview over not enough content for an article. Also maybe environmental science (I can see her doing research in this field like knee deep in a river collecting samples to measure turbidity or some shit but it’s so interdisciplinary I don’t think she’d major in it.. but also I can see her being vegan and like one of those crazy British climate activists DISCLAIMER I’m absolutely not hating on this in fact I am an environmental science/physics double major who is also a vegan knee deep in rivers doing research on mineral accumulation in VA lmfao). I can sooooort of see her doing poli sci but also like no absolutely not she’s too anarchistic like she’d be fucking the system left and right then get kicked out or something (but also most poli sci majors I know are extreme leftists in the way I imagine she’d be… so…) Overall I think studio art or fashion design would be her thing and she’d also be a cool ass barista on campus that everyone is in love with
Noah: yeah yeah he’s dead but not in my heart he’s not. He’d be alive and doing aerospace engineering. Yes I know your eyes just bulged out of your head but hear me out. He’s so precious I feel like he was a dinosaur kid but like the kind where literally everything about his life was dinosaurs his pjs his books his room his birthday parties like you know the type. Then when he grew out of that at like 5 or 6 he became a space/planes kid. He’d make models of planes and there would be a bunch hanging from strings on his ceiling with a model of the solar system in the corner. He would never have grown out of this. In elementary and middle school he’d be in the gifted program and from my experience in the VA public school gifted program we did soooo many building projects that in hindsight were just fun engineering challenges for kids. I also headcanon him being good with numbers but don’t have an explanation for this.. maybe it’s because his first sentence had a number in it. Maybe I’m thinking of how he has to calculate dates or something? Whatever anyway he’d be the first kind in third grade to master their multiplication tables and teachers would love him because even though he’s hyperactive (ALIVE AND HYPERACTIVE THANK YOU) all of his special interests are sciencey and maybe he’s not paying attention to the class material but he’s explaining something he read in an astrophysics book to his seatmate so they wouldn’t be mad (this is me projecting because I was hyperactive but I would explain the entire plot of warrior cats to my seatmates and neither the teachers nor my classemates appreciated that ever… didn’t matter if I was first at multiplication warrior cats freak was immediate social isolation so I choose to live vicariously through my own fictional Noah czerny thank you very much). At Monmouth he’d make rockets and Ronan would paint them crudely and they’d fuck around launching them in fields coming up with dumb experiments and betting on them. Ronan would sometimes cheat by dreaming ones that don’t obey the laws of physics and Noah would secretly inspect them for hours in his room later trying to figure it out (but Ronan would only do this very rarely so Noah wouldn’t catch on). Then he’d go to college and obviously do aerospace engineering AND he’d excel because he already knows all there is to know about aerodynamics, propulsion, and flight mechanics. I am so sure of this I don’t even have alternate hypotheses. Also super random but I headcanon that Noah is Jewish and he him and Ronan lovingly rib a lot about catholic jew shit (guys as im writing this im realizing that I just want to be my fictional version of Noah someone be my sassy catholic Irish emo bestie please)
Ok that’s all thanks for listening
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waywardstation · 8 months ago
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WIP FRIDAY
I apologize for getting this out two days late, I’ve been busy with lots of packing and events! But I have a little reprieve, so I wanted to post another WIP; this one is from Heart Full, Bowl Empty.
BE AWARE THAT THIS SEGMENT INVOLVES A CONVERSATION REVOLVING AROUND UNWILLING BUT INTENTIONAL STARVATION. I know there are people who say they can’t read this fic because of themes like this, so be aware of this before reading this WIP!!
I included this snippet in today’s WIP because I have like three versions of the entire segment this snippet is from. I feel like it’s a really important segment with a really important conversation, and I’ve had a hard time balancing all the emotions the way I want to between Ingo and Akari, with frustration, sadness, anger, and empathy, to realistically get them to the resolution I want at the end of it.
The final version will probably only include a few parts from this particular segment.
Enjoy!!
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“I knew it! You’re doing it again!” Akari’s eyebrows scrunched, trying to understand through the frustration. “You said you wouldn’t!”
“Circumstances will improve soon.” Clearly done with the conversation, that was all Ingo said, but it was confession enough that he had fallen back on his word. Shame contaminated his voice, but if there was any regret, he hid it well.
“No, it won’t!” They were not even half-way through winter yet. “And you know it won’t!”
Ingo said nothing as the kits carefully moved around his slumped form, finding comfortable places to settle around him. She didn’t know if he intended to snuff the conversation out with angered silence, or if he was just too exhausted to care about arguing with her anymore. If it wasn’t for his small occasional signs of movement or acknowledgement, she’d think he was actually sleeping.
Akari carefully stepped into the nesting layers, moving to sit down next to Ingo. She settled with her back against the cavern wall, pulling her knees close as a few kits shuffled around to accommodate her. “You know I’m right.”
Huffing out an irritated sigh and nothing more, it didn’t seem like Ingo had any intentions to engage with her argument anymore.
“You couldn’t even pull yourself up over the ridge,” She prodded at him again, trying to motivate more conversation out of him. “I had to help you!”
“There are many, many factors that go into that.” A reluctant answer, perhaps a reflexive attempt to quell her worry; Ingo feebly rubbed his wrapped hand, almost as a display for his excuse.
“I’ve seen you do more when you’ve been hurt worse.” Akari retorted, a little softer now but still cold.
Ingo’s eyes remained closed, though his hardened expression implied that it came across as more accusatory than she’d intended. But perhaps it was precisely the time to be accusatory.
“Ingo, you’re so tired all the time now – you stopped coming to the training grounds because you just can’t make the trips all the time anymore! And you’re sleeping so much more than you used to, and it’s like you’re always hungry all the time, even though all I see you doing anymore is gathering food!” Akari’s voice grew more jagged as she continued to jab at him, entirely uninterrupted.
It was getting difficult. With Ingo’s tunic still sopping by the bucket, still somewhat red from the exhausted effort of washing out the blood, it could not hide the ribs that pressed out just a little bit more, or help fill out what the waistline had lost under the loosening belt. The abject dread of directly acknowledging that was too much.
“And- and look! You aren’t even willing to hold a conversation with me anymore, and I don’t know if it’s because you just won’t, or because you can’t!” The kits shifted uncomfortably as Akari retreated back into her own frustration instead. “People think you’re sick, Ingo! They’re asking me about you! What are you doing?”
The exhausted man remained where he laid in the nesting material, only moving his hands to rub at his face and sigh — a deep, forced sigh that swelled his side before releasing. Akari almost didn’t think he’d answer her, but with some effort, he propped himself up first onto his elbows, then slumped forward. The teen watched him run shaky fingers through his hair as he sat next to her.
“…I don’t know what I should do.” The guilt. The weary guilt cracked his voice and tore Akari’s anger down to heartache.
#ref for fic#BE AWARE THIS IS DISCUSSING INTENTIONAL BUT UNWILLING STARVATION#tw starvation#just in case#cause I know not everyone vibes with this story#and I’ll say it’s been weird myself returning to these segments I wrote months ago and re-reading them#AND TO BE MORE CAREFUL I talk about a personal situation sort of dealing with this below#a lot has happened in the timeframe of originally writing this and coming back to this#at the end of fall I got very very sick and it lasted well into February#I unwillingly shed thirty-five pounds because I could not eat#and I didn’t notice at all until I stopped and realized just how tight I had to make my work belt#even when family members pointed it out during the holidays when they’d hug me#it wasn’t until someone got very concerned and did something about it that I realized just how bad it was#I’m sure people remember when I mentioned I had gastritis#that’s what all this was I just never really went into detail about how bad it truely was here#so coming back and reading this segment specifically#having written it months before I went through any of this#felt really really weird and a little uncomfortable#I edited Akari’s accusations a little to fit my situation more about a month back#because I did not realize just how much more stuff like this would make you want to sleep#at least in my experience#but it’s been very very just#strange I guess coming back to this#it doesn’t make me want to not work on HFBE anymore it just feels very weird
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confusedgayscreeching · 6 months ago
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Hi! It’s been a while lol- I’m gonna try to get back to posting semi-regularly but I make no promises! I am currently feeling very frustrated about the arguments about Stolitz I’m seeing verywhere and I need to rant so here we are!
Okay so one thing I think a lot of people trip up with in analyzing this relationship is comparing them in the way of “who is worse.” To me that’s weird and not a realistic or productive way to talk about out this. They both suck in their own ways and it makes more sense to analyze how they effect each other and themselves rather than arguing over something so subjective, especially since even if we were able to come to a conclusion as a fandom about who is worse (which again is not possible to do objectively) it wouldn’t do anything or move the conversation forward at all.
Blame shifting and villainizing characters because you relate to one more or understand one more might make you feel good but it doesn’t actually contribute to the conversation. They both do fucked up things at different points and they both suck sometimes, but to me it makes more sense and is more interesting to look at how they both effect each other and their psychology, especially because trying to assign morality to any actions in a show like this is redundant and misses the point- looking at it from an outside lens and saying “x is bad so they are bad” doesn’t mean anything within the context of the show or the relationship and it never has.
I know a lot of us love these characters and/or relate heavily to them but starting arguments online because someone suggests your poor little meow meow possibly isn’t perfect is genuinely just dumb and doesn’t move the conversation forward at all, nor does it help us resolve or continue the conversation in a satisfying way.
This show and these characters are fucked up. They’re meant to be fucked up. They do awful things that can’t be justified and that’s just the point. When you make it a competition it doesn’t do anything for anyone and all you end up doing is invalidating other people’s feelings and opinions whether you mean to or not.
We all need to try to be more neutral and just acknowledge why each character might feel a certain way without feeling the need to justify that feeling or make them a martyr. Just like with people in real life a character’s emotions are just their emotions, they don’t need to be justified or have an arguable reason for feeling that way, feelings are valid no matter what, and what matters is how they handle those feelings.
Idk about anyone else but one of the reasons I fell in love with Hazbin hotel and helliva boss is because they’re all awful and irredeemable but they’re still sentient beings who are written in a way that shows they still deserve empathy and love, the show isn’t trying to force these characters to justify their existence by being good and that’s beautiful because the idea that human decency is conditional is far too prevalent.
Idk this will probably seem preachy and long winded but it just feels silly and disingenuous to try to talk about right/wrong with these characters or this show in general, especially considering that it ignores the more emotional inner reasons for why these characters act the way they do, which is so much more interesting to explore.
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phantom-of-the-keurig · 11 months ago
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“It’s problematic to think the clones who were isolated on an actual water planet with no outside contact and trained with the intention to be military assets wouldn’t have a complete and total understanding of sex how dare you assume th-”
Baby if you didn’t grow up in the abstinence only hell scape that is the Bible Belt you can just say that 😮‍💨
If your public high school sex ed and health class didn’t include a single module about anatomy or health but mostly involved a local preacher stopping by to warn you of the dangers of carnal relations and your senior year class of less than 150 students had 10 teen pregnancies alone and STDS ran rampant because no one knew how to fuck safely-
Of all the nonsense in Star Wars, from music called Jizz to Droopy McCool releasing a vanilla scent, the clones not knowing how to fuck, who they want to fuck, or even what it really means to fuck, is probably one of the most realistic takes in canon. Does that make you uncomfortable? Good! It should! Because that’s the entire point!!! It’s really shitty that this entire population of sentients were never considered human enough to be taught basic shit that civilians learn, because they were not viewed as people they were republic military property oh my god how smooth brained are you??
I get it, fanon can be goofy. But there’s this awfully suspicious correlation between y’all that hate the fandom at large and pee at the slightest thing yet refuse to acknowledge the uncomfortable and sad realities of clones and their military + isolated upbringing and the implications of what that would mean for them when tossed out into the galaxy
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forgottenfourr · 1 year ago
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i saw you in a dream - university smau
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chapter eleven - not off the hook
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word count: 656
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a/n: tbh i have been awake for 43 hours so this shit has not been proof read. so if it doesn't make any sense i will fix it once i wake up from my slumber.
it has come to my attention that a lot of you probably think i am female. i am not. i am male. gay man. homosexual. blue green pride flag. trans flag too. my pronouns are he/xe and i’m a dude :)
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jeongin’s pov:
being emotionally vulnerable is something he never lets himself be. it doesn’t matter if it’s with his family or a professional therapist. he doesn’t do it. so now that he’s come to a head with felix, his best friend, he feels like he is going to bust at the seams at the thought of explaining everything to him.
though felix is a complete and utter asshole for what he did, jeongin feels like he is partly to blame. in felix’s eyes, his behavior the other day wasn’t much different from how he and his friends usually act. jeongin is sure that if felix truly did know just how serious the situation was, he wouldn’t have spilled it to everyone and furthermore breaking jeongin’s trust.
he could feel his breath hitch in his throat as he heard the front door of his apartment click open. his freckled blue hair friend weakly making his way through the door, his usual sunshine demeanor clouded and dazed. even though he tried his best to hide it, guilt and sadness was evident on felix’s face, pinging jeongin in the heart.
one thing felix isn’t is, and never will be, is a bad person. that is something jeongin is 100% sure of. there is not a single bad bone or intention in his body. not even if he tried. jeongin always admired that about him.
that’s why it is almost impossible to stay mad at him. there was no malice or hatred behind felix’s actions.
the air in the apartment was still and almost chilling. even on a warm day like today.
“hi” felix says, almost inaudible.
“hey lix,” there is a smile laced in jeongin’s tone. causing felix to turn to face him almost instantly. the familiar nickname making him feel once again comfortable in his own home.
there is a brief shared moment between them. a collective acknowledgment that things were going to be okay.
“aye-“ felix begins to call out, guilt straining through his voice. but his words became muffled in jeongin’s shoulder and he gets wrapped into a tight hug.
jeongin isn’t one for physical affection so the embrace is taken fully after felix’s initial shock.
felix breaks the hug.
“ayen i am so fucking sorry i didn’t realize how serious it was and i never met to hurt you.-“
“lix.” jeongin tries to cut his best friend off.
felix continues to ramble on. “if i knew i would’ve never said anything in the first place and-“
“FELIX.” jeongin calls out again, admittedly way louder than he was meaning.
felix stopped talking.
“i know you and i know you didn’t mean any harm.” jeongin says in a reassuring tone and felix finds himself releasing a breath he wasn’t aware he was holding in.
“you fucked up big time. but you’re aware of it.” he takes a deep breath, mentally preparing himself for the emotional vulnerability he knew had to come. “but i don’t blame you for it. well i do. but you didn’t know anything other than what i let you know. and that wasn’t much. if i was in your shoes, i’m sure i wouldn’t have taken what i said seriously at all. because frankly, it sounds ridiculous.”
felix finds himself chuckling at jeongin’s words. “yeah, it’s not everyday your best friend tells you that he has strangely realistic dreams and simultaneously has fallen for the person who has been showing up in them.”
jeongin could feel the tips of his ears warm at felix’s statement. he really did sound insane.
“oh fuck off would you?” jeongin says in a teasing and fake annoyed tone. felix just gives him a deadpanned expression before breaking into a smile.
“for the record though,” jeongin adds on. “you’re not off the hook. you’re doing my apartment chores for the rest of the week.” felix groans in response, dramatically throwing himself on the couch.
it was impossible to stay upset with felix.
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girl4music · 3 months ago
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WayHaught’s intimacy/off-screen sex/make out/representation/whatever you want to call it scene.
Some WEARP fans that have watched and reviewed the special have said that the scene feels forced or a little too convenient. I know exactly what they mean by that. First of all - the direction of it is literally in your face. There’s no artistic nuance as far as the direction and framing of it goes. The soundstage is purposefully erotic. It’s meant to be what it’s meant to be. Sex. And the portrayal… well, it’s typical DomKat chemistry, for sure, but it doesn’t feel like it’s their choreography. It feels like this time - it was all the showrunner’s choice. Which isn’t necessarily a bad thing. It’s just not what we’re used to as veterans in engaging with WEARP when it comes to the way DomKat themselves portray WayHaught’s physical intimacy. It usually looks and feels a lot more natural and improvised. This wasn’t so it didn’t feel as organic as I’m used to seeing it being.
It was still a realistic and authentic portrayal of WLW intimacy. It just didn’t look or feel like WayHaught’s specifically because it didn’t look or feel like DomKat. I mean I could be entirely wrong about that. Maybe this is just how both actors being settled into and fully embracing and comfortable with their queerness are. I’m just saying that it didn’t look or feel that way to me. However, what I did pick up to counteract that about the intimacy scene which was absolutely a return to form for WayHaught - that I always really love - was what caused it to happen in the scene itself. It was emotional intimacy and a useful and effective way to convey and develop on their narrative. It was, to me, a beautifully written acknowledgement and communication of both Waverly and Nicole’s feelings, desires, intentions, ambitions in that Waverly has just received acceptance and validation from Nicole that they could part ways for awhile in order for her to do what she wants to do in Egypt with Jeremy and in how Nicole confesses to her her tendency to delay or stifle Waverly’s potential because she doesn’t want to be without her and because her own personal desires and ambitions include and require Waverly to be around - to be home, with her as partners. I actually really like that this was how their physical intimacy came about. That it wasn’t just made into a scene for the sake of it even though Emily likely did think about that part first because she always makes representation a priority.
Also - as I mentioned in a previous post - I also really like how Waverly’s top came off but Nicole’s didn’t because I genuinely felt that was in respect to Kat being pregnant. Just as I feel it was also in respect to Kat being pregnant that that intimacy scene didn’t go on any longer than was necessary to convey the intention of the scene and so they wouldn’t be left in the awkward position of representing a full-on WLW sex scene because I have no idea how they could without making Kat feel extremely uncomfortable as much as the fans probably wanted and wished for it to happen in and at that moment. Emily thought of Kat.
And forgive me for being blatantly gay and a pervert, but I could not fucking take my eyes off Dom there so obviously, that was also a factor why I love the scene. But I mean, I was pretty much staring at Dom every time they were on screen throughout the entire thing. I cannot believe how much more visually attractive I find the character Waverly with a butch presentation. So yeah, that contributed a whole lot too. I won’t lie. I’m a red blooded queer woman. Fucking sue me 💁‍♀️
All in all though, I was satisfied with what we got for that scene given the 90-minute timeframe restriction and the fact that they had to hide or cover Kat’s belly. I do feel the choreography could have looked and felt more natural to DomKat’s chemistry but it’s no big deal. I’m happy I got a well-written scene regardless.
There’s certainly been much worse WLW representation of physical intimacy in TV art/entertainment. I think what we got was pretty good.
It’s just not what we’re used to getting. That’s all.
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trippinsorrows · 4 days ago
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You do something that I feel like a lot of fic writers do which is acknowledge racism characters have to deal with.
Roman with his family in lyte is really good bc when I read about his struggles from both sides I thought that was really cool
Or in this ask ( https://www.tumblr.com/trippinsorrows/770611757088686080/i-like-that-you-described-wherever-they-live-as) I feel like most writers wouldn’t have thought to acknowledge that these kids although rich and powerful would still have to deal with racism. Probably less than most people bc of their parents but still it doesn’t shield them grom everything
It’s really refreshing
thank you so much! 🥺🥺🥺 i've experienced racial trauma both personally and professionally, and living in this world as a woman of color means i'm always naturally, sadly, going to have these fucked up experiences. thus, i want the characters who look like me to be shows as also having these experiences, even if heavy, they're real.
when i write, i like to immerse real world shit. i like to write realistic shit, even in an unrealistic mafia au fic like 'looking through your eyes.' racism is real. oppression is real. it exists in all universes. and people don't wanna talk about it, but i will. even in fics.
that's also why i love writing people who look like me for people who look like me. because we deserve to be seen and so do our experiences. ❤️
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amenemisa · 2 years ago
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Aaah! Mushroomfields and their fictions! Their fictions always make me feel better and worse!
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I drew this drawing one or two week ago after reading their fiction about reincarnation again. -and i will read it again... who loves pain? me?? nopeee(!)- Then I couldn't help but paint and here it is. Hmm I have to say that I actually drew this drawing entirely on their fiction, so they were totally my muse. But as a result, i played around with a thing or two myself, so at this point I can say that i went a little bit out of the original text they wrote. There was no such information about the outfit Fukuzawa was wearing but I like to see Fukuzawa like this. And Mori by Mushroomfields didn't get the job done with a single finger grip, hehe. Anyway! Long story short, my muse was definitely Mushroomfields and what I'm drawing here outlines the scene in their fiction, but what I'm drawing is far from the scene in that fiction. Ehm... thank you for listening to the turmoil in my mind, and I strongly suggest you read their fiction. I'll leave a short excerpt here for you~
<Fukuzawa stood in utter boredom amongst the crowd of dressed up guests filling the ballroom, filled with too many enemy organisations that Fukuzawa was throughly sick conversing to as though they wouldn’t all pull a gun on one another the moment this night of a truce was over. It felt fickle, something Fukuzawa didn’t like to indulge in when he was nothing if not a realist. Yet, there was one man amongst them all, one enemy somewhere in the crowd that Fukuzawa would be more than happy to indulge. It showed.
When finally Mori had come to rescue him from his circle of small talk. The younger man passed Fukuzawa’s conversing circle, his body coming close enough for their shoulder’s to brush, and his eyes didn’t dare look to Fukuzawa, the two not even giving away a hint of acknowledgment to the other as Mori ghosted by. But, hidden from view of any possible prying eyes, Fukuzawa felt Mori’s pointer finger touch his palm hanging by his side, the other tracing a slow line from Fukuzawa’s pinkie all the way up to his wrist, teasingly tempting in the way Mori knew Fukuzawa would follow.
Mori continued walking by until Fukuzawa watched from the corner of his eye as the younger left outside the large door’s of the ballroom, before he cleared his throat. The circle stopped idly talking for a moment to direct their attention to Fukuzawa as he nodded once to them all, gracefully placing his half drunken Champaign glass on a waiter’s tray passing by.
“If you’ll excuse me,” Fukuzawa regarded, before turning on his heel and swiftly locating his way through the crowd until he reached the ballroom’s doors. Just like that, in one simple touch he was chasing after Mori like two opposite ends of a magnet compelled towards each other.>
And yes I'll probably be on the exam when this is posted on my tumblr, wish me luck~
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amyyythestarry · 1 year ago
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Who do you think gave Amane his bruises?
Y’know I’ve been pondering on this for so long. Like I just don’t know really, I have my small little theory so I’ll share it.
I have no idea what was up with his parents during his middle school days ( Last middle school days ), I’ve heard theories that maybe Amane’s parents were absent, and I can see why they think that. He was probably one of those quiet kids that nobody payed much attention to so I don’t think he was bullied.
AND TSUKASA, ever since that ‘Tsukasa SA’s Amane’ theory went viral I just deny any theories saying Tsukasa maybe hurt Amane. I’m traumatized ok 😭.
BUT, I’m trying to be realistic here and say that, maybe, just maybe Tsukasa did cause the injuries. But maybe not on only his account.
When speaking of his ‘abuser’ Amane was really forgiving about the situation, he said that he didn’t care and that he’d put aside all of the violence.
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I don’t think he would have said this about anyone else for hurting him. It has to be someone he’s close to, someone he cares about, loves, and cherishes. And I’m pretty sure the only person he feels that way about back then was his only sibling.
But it’s also confusing to think that it would be Tsukasa because of how he acts around Amane. He doesn’t act violent or anything. Tsukasa can be violent though, like with Mitsuba, or apparitions and whoever poses as a threat I guess, but he’s never been even a little bit violent with Amane.
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This is just a way that Tsukasa shows affection. He wanted Amane to see the stars, and probably wasn’t aware that he was pinching Amane cheeks too hard.
He’s really cute like that y’know. I believe sometimes he can just innocently, accidentally, hurt someone by being intrigued curious and excited. He’s very non-self aware.
So using the term non-self aware is what I actually imagine him to be most times. Not knowing he’s doing bad things to people, probably until someone tells him he is. Like when Sakura told him to be gentler to girls seeing how he was with Nene the first time.
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He looked a little absent there at first, didn’t he? Even while he was about to bash her head he was looking forward. When she stopped him from feeding Mitsuba he just sat there for a minute. Maybe not even acknowledging what he was doing? Just doing it. Like a reflex? Then stops what he’s doing, carries her like a gentleman, apologizes and puts her to sleep so she wouldn’t have to see him shove a bird heart down Mitsuba’s throat ( At least he listened to Sakura ).
I imagine he just came back to his senses when he realized he was about to hurt Nene. Like his brain told him “Hey dude, I need you to stop dissociating, you’re about to become really misogynistic if you don’t gain some self control” ( Lol ).
But yeah. Maybe that stuff happens to him on a daily basis, like he’s not fully aware and mentally there but he’s physically there.
If he was actually the one to cause harm to Amane when they were human, I could see that dissociating thing being the case.
ALSO, he has that wish granting supernatural in him! Like they’re one and everything, being present in the the same body.
I think that supernatural may also be the reason of the abusive Tsukasa back when he was alive ( If he was abusive to Amane ).
Maybe it was like that cartoon ghost possession rep where the character possessed by the ghost switches up every now and then because the ghost is apart of them too.
Him randomly dissociating, not feeling like he’s in his own body and accidentally hurting his twin brother, then coming back to his senses and realizing what he’s doing. I could see that.
Since Amane is his older brother, Amane forgives Tsukasa for the random outburst. Or maybe he notices something is wrong?
Whatever the case might be, I hope in this arc we can at least see more of the Yugi twins’ backstory, especially more of Tsukasa POV.
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tiniestbee · 1 year ago
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Make Me
Daichi liked the little things in life; a nice dinner with his old teammates, a kiss goodbye before he left the house, and of course, the vivid recollections of you sobbing as he forced another orgasm out of you with his tongue and fingers before he had you absolutely wrecked on his cock.
Or, Daichi is a pleasure dom and no one can change my mind.
tags : not sfw, pwp, reader insert, afab reader, attempted bratting by reader, daddy kink, feminine nicknames used for reader(darling, princess, sweet girl), established relationship, established dom/sub relationship, overstimulation, forced orgasm, multiple orgasms, stop light system, mention of safewords(not used), aged up characters, not canon compliant, author does not use y/n
a/n : originally posted to AO3 on 9/5/20. vaguely self shipy in terms of reader's height, but otherwise it should be fairly neutral. also, is this realistic? probably not. was it hot when I wrote it? absolutely. this was the first explicit fic I posted to AO3, and also the first I've posted to Tumblr since crossposting, so if you notice a tag I should have included, please let me know, and thanks so much for reading!
minors, ageless, and blank blogs DNI, you will be blocked!
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Normally, Daichi wouldn’t bat an eye at your antics; twirling around in a too short skirt you picked out just for him, brushing up against him while he worked on dinner and rambling a mile a minute. But when you started getting mouthy, asking him “why should I?” and “can’t you do it?”, his patience started wearing thin. It wasn’t until you dropped this particular bomb, however, that he finally snapped.
“Darling,” Daichi sighed, “I’m going to need you to be a little quieter for me until I get this done. Can you do that for me?”
“I dunno. Why don’t you make me.”
Daichi all but froze, arching an eyebrow even though you couldn’t see it, and finished chopping the vegetables you’d need for dinner. That done, he put them into tupperware, studiously ignoring you for the time being, and set them in the fridge. You couldn’t help squirming while you waited for him to acknowledge you, thinking you had probably gone a little too far and maybe regretting it just a little.
“Oh, don’t get all shy now. Get over here,” He ordered, leaning back against the island while you made your way over, trying to fake a confidence you didn’t really feel. Throwing your arms around his waist, you shot him what you hoped was a blinding smile, pressing as close as you could into his chest.
“Yes Daddy?” You knew what it would do; you were already too far in to back out now, might as well enjoy the ride. Grabbing you by the upper arms, he spun you around and pinned you to the counter, hands flat on either side of you. It happened so fast you almost couldn’t react, breath caught in your throat as he pressed his forehead to yours, eyes squeezed shut while he attempted to steady his breath. Opening his eyes, he smirked down at you, straightening up until it felt like he was towering over you.
“Fine. You wanna play? Let’s play.” It was like a switch had flipped, and he was a whole other person standing in front of you. He reached down to grab the backs of your thighs and hoisted you up onto the island, pressing his mouth to the base of your neck to suck and bite little marks into the skin. His hands slid up your thighs and under your panties, fingers hooking into the edges and pulling until they fell to the floor on their own.
His target freed, he moved back to fall to his knees, pushing your skirt up to reveal your pussy, wet and waiting. Wasting no time, he took each thigh in a bruising grip and licked a thick line up the center until he reached your clit, closing his lips around it when he did. You couldn’t help the jolt of your body when the heat of his tongue touched you, a shiver shooting up your spine.
As annoyed as you knew he was, he was surprisingly gentle, fingertip shaped bruises notwithstanding. You couldn’t help a giggle when his tongue swiped across your opening and his brows furrowed, clearly not expecting the liquid already seeping out to stain your skin. The giggle quickly morphed into a moan when he slid his index finger in, down to the knuckle in one slow glide. If you didn’t know any better, you’d think Daichi was smirking down there.
He started a slow rhythm in and out, focusing his tongue on and around your clit to get you warmed up, thoughts of how best to get you sobbing on his cock as quickly as possible warring with how much he wanted to wring as many orgasms out of you with his mouth as he could. Shrugging internally, he decided he’d make you come as many times as it took to make you cry, then go from there.
With that in mind, he started eating you like a man starved to try and get you to orgasm as quickly as possible, carefully pressing in a second finger when he felt you were ready for it. With the extra stretch and added stimulation, it took only a few thrusts and you were gone, crying out and clenching around his fingers while he worked you through it. When he looked up at you, tongue still dragging over your clit even as the aftershocks began to fade, the glint in his eyes let you know you were in for a long night.
It felt like he knelt between your legs for hours, bringing you to orgasm over and over until you could barely think straight, and when he asked if you wanted him to stop, you’d say no, but when he asked if you wanted to come again, you’d say no too. After his most recent inquiry, he sat back on his heels to give you a bit of a breather, rubbing his hands up and down your thighs to let you know he hadn’t left. Leaning his forehead on the edge of the counter, he figured now was the time to get you on his cock, tears be damned. He’d get you crying one way or another.
You had laid back on the island somewhere between orgasms four and six, maybe 20 minutes ago, maybe an hour, you weren’t sure, finally letting the built up tears spill over and leak down your temples and into your sweat soaked hair. Your whole body felt wrung out and sore, but nowhere more so than your swollen, sensitive clit. Even the slightest brush of your thighs sent a shock up your spine.
Daichi called your name to get your attention, watching you slowly sit up with a soft smile. Instead of answering, you merely cocked your head and looked down at him, making grabby hands in his direction. After searching your eyes to confirm you were still there with him, he chuckled and gathered you into his arms for a hug, one arm around your waist and one hand stroking your hair.
“How’re we feeling, princess?” Again forgoing words, you just nodded into his chest, humming a little tiredly. You felt really good, honestly. Somehow both tense all over and utterly relaxed, something only Daichi could manage to make you feel. Letting out a good natured huff, he carefully separated your limbs and held you at arms length, eyebrow raised. “I need your color.”
“Green Daddy. I’m green,” you answered, making eye contact to reassure him that yes, you were there, everything was good, you were fine. He still hesitated a moment, squeezing your upper arms a bit before he let go.
“You know I have to ask. I’ll be right back. Daddy’s gonna take real good care of you, alright?” He didn’t wait for an answer, not really expecting one, and disappeared into your shared room. He exited fairly soon after, one hand behind his back like he was hiding something from you. Nothing could scare you at this point, what could it possibly be? Opening one of the drawers below you, he dropped the object in and closed it back, giving you an innocent smile.
“You’re ridiculous,” You laughed, pulling him in for your first kiss since he’d pinned you to the counter a good hour or two prior. Daichi wasted no time in tilting his head and licking at the seam of your lips, teeth catching on your bottom lip when they opened. Otherwise he kept it slow, just deep enough to keep your attention while he stepped closer and dropped his hands to his jeans, popping the button and lowering the fly. Hooking his thumbs in the waistband of his boxers, he shoved them both down just far enough to pull his dick free.
One hand gave himself a cursory stroke or two then just gripped it at the base, groaning into your mouth when it felt better than he expected. You couldn’t hold back a choked gasp when Daichi reached his hand down between your thighs, carefully avoiding the swollen nub as he trailed his fingers up and down, occasionally dipping a fingertip into your slick pussy to tease. You weren’t sure how much more you could handle, but safewording out never crossed your mind. Daichi would take care of you. He always did.
Finally breaking your kiss, he moved back, tapping your thigh and gesturing for you to get off the counter. Thinking he meant for you to get on your knees, you did as he asked, starting to kneel when his hand gripped your arm to stop you. He appreciated the thought of course, and maybe were this a regular day he would have you choke on it, but he had plans, so that would have to wait.
“Just turn around, love,” he explained, guiding you to face the island and gently pushing you until you were bent over it. You reached back and flipped your skirt up to expose your butt, shaking your hips as you looked back at him over your shoulder and absolutely beaming when he brought his free hand up to rub his face. “You’ll be the death of me, you know.”
Daichi pressed up against you and leaned down, your back to his chest, to press kisses down your neck and across your shoulders, sneaking his hand between you to circle your clit in earnest. Your body jolted underneath him, desperate to get away with nowhere to go, pinned between him and the counter again. A high whine forced itself out of your throat when he didn’t let up, squirming even as you felt the heat stirring low in your stomach.
“Daiichiii,” You cried, your legs twitching as the feeling teetered between pain and pleasure, too much and just enough. You had a feeling, likely a correct one, that he was trying to get one more out of you before he finally fucked you. How he could wait so long when he was rock hard and leaking, if the dampness on the back of your thigh was any indication, was beyond you. Your hands fluttered uselessly at your sides, curling and relaxing on thin air, until you stretched forward and grabbed the other side of the island, knuckles going pale from the pressure.
“Please, I don’t know if I can, I don’t, it hurts,” Your rambling devolved into meaningless sounds, the occasional yelp breaking the stream when he pressed a little too hard or moved too quickly. Body flushed from head to toe, you felt like you were on fire, a white hot ball condensing inside you that was egged on by the edge of pain.
Daichi could tell you were close by the way your muscles were tensing, and your moans had taken on a desperate tone, breaking off halfway through more often than not. Keeping his pace steady, he kissed his way back up your shoulder to the base of your neck and bit down, just hard enough to leave marks. The pain sent electricity down your spine and you came with a bitten off shout, mouth hung open as tears rolled down your cheeks and your muscles seized. Satisfied, he drew back, kissed the red indents left by his teeth and eased the pressure on your clit but kept the same pace, waiting until the initial shock died down to let your muscles relax.
“There’s my girl. I knew you had it in you,” He soothed, retracting his hand from underneath you to rub both hands up and down your sides, letting you come down in your own time. Once you had relaxed enough to lay mostly flat on the counter once more, he reached down to grab himself, rubbing his cockhead up and down your slick center while he waited. “Color?” He questioned once more, putting the slightest bit of pressure on your entrance as he passed it, not enough to slide in but enough that your pussy clenched every time he did.
You gave yourself a moment to think about the answer, which was unnecessary really, but for the sake of honoring the question, you did anyway. Tears aside, you felt pretty decent. Nothing hurt too badly, the stiffness in your fingers aside, you still knew where you were and who you were with, even if time had ceased to matter well before your third climax of the evening. So you answered green, a little hoarse from the crying but otherwise clear. Daichi let out a sigh of relief at your answer and tilted his hips forward, pushing until the head made it past the initial resistance with a little pop that caused a tiny jolt of your hips.
“Fuck, I forget how much I love your pussy sometimes,” He mumbled into your shoulder, pressing a final kiss into the skin before straightening up, letting out a weak laugh when you squeezed around him. You flushed at the words but couldn’t help the smile they caused. Daichi could dirty talk with the best of them, but somehow he very rarely swore. He hated how endearing you found it.
He cut your train of thought off in the best way possible, by starting a slow press into you, the same painfully steady pace from tip to base, until he bottomed out with a deep moan. Fully sheathed within you, his hands moved to your hips, holding you down until your hip bones ached from the pressure. It was a good ache though, one that meant you would bruise.
Your breath came out shuddering from the tears still leaking down your face, every single movement he made heightened by how sensitive you were. Shifting on your toes, you arched your back a little to let him slip just that last bit more in and groaned quietly, feeling like the head was pressed right up against your cervix. Your walls fluttered weakly around him as you acclimated to his size, still a little surprised you weren’t used to it by now. Relaxing your grip on the counter’s edge to spread your fingers a little, you let your hands lay flat on the counter before letting out a deep breath.
“You can move. I’m alright.”
Daichi needed no further encouragement, immediately drawing his hips back and thrusting forward, the sharp sound of skin on skin echoing around the room. Like in most things, he was steady but unrelenting; every thrust measured but giving you the full length of his cock again and again. The feel of him dragging against your insides was enough to cause a fresh wave of tears, keeping you from paying much attention at all to what else Daichi was doing until something cold and hard pressed directly onto your clit.
Daichi pressed the on button and the vibrations assaulting your swollen peak threatened to overwhelm you instantly, a scream ripped from your throat as the sensations finally registered. It was absolutely too much, you were sure you were going to fall apart right then and there. Every muscle in your lower body tensed, your pussy included, clenched so tight around his cock Daichi almost struggled to keep moving. He stopped moving when he was fully inside you once more, curling himself over your tight form to press his mouth to your ear, trying to sooth you as best he could.
“You’re okay, I promise. You can give me another, I know you can,” He murmured, giving a few experimental half thrusts before settling on slowly grinding against you, every shift sparking heat inside you. For some reason, that’s what did it; breaking down into sobs as you came so hard your vision spotted. Your hips started moving of their own accord, twitching back to try and push Daichi ever deeper then up to get away from the vibrator before starting over again, everything feeling like it was all too much. He didn’t stop his hips or remove the vibrator, all the while whispering sweet nothings in your ear, moving his free hand up your body to thumb away what tears he could reach.
Finally, just when it seemed like Daichi might leave you suspended in limbo between orgasm and let down, he clicked the vibrator off and you sprawled out on the counter like someone had cut your strings. It felt like you came forever, and even when the initial wave faded, aftershocks traveled up and down your entire body for a good minute after, each one causing you to clench around Daichi’s still achingly hard cock. You had the wherewithal to feel bad about that for a moment or two, before he was pulling out and helping you upright.
“I’m so proud of you, my sweet girl.” You hummed at the praise, wrapping your arms around his neck to keep yourself standing. Your whole body felt like it was shaking, your legs from the now released tension and your chest as you tried to settle your breathing now that the tears had abated. Bending his knees, Daichi scooped you up and carried you to the bedroom, setting you down on the bed with a chaste kiss before disappearing into the bathroom. You flopped back onto the pillows as soon as he let you go, wriggling until you were comfortable and waiting, eyes half closed, for him to return.
He did not too long after, soft shorts slung low on his hips and a warm washcloth in hand. He pressed one knee into the bed and leaned over you, carefully wiping your face before moving to the rest of you. He made sure to clean off any lingering wetness before tossing the cloth and crawling onto the bed. Flipping the covers back, he slid down into the sheets and beckoned you closer, an offer which you took gladly.Throwing your leg up over his hips, you laid your head on his chest and flopped your free arm over his stomach.
“That was good. Thanks Daddy.” Daichi grinned at the slur to your words, pressing a kiss to the top of your head as your breathing deepened with sleep almost instantly. He should be the one thanking you, for putting up with him and his obnoxious need to have his mouth on you, but that could wait. Pulling the covers up and over the two of you, he murmured your name and pressed his nose to your hair, holding you close as he too descended into sleep.
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watermelonsloth · 1 year ago
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Here’s something that would’ve been interesting for Boruto to be about: intergenerational conflict and resentment.
I’m sure the majority of people reading this at least know what I’m talking about, that being when older generations insult, degrade, and infantilize the younger generations. Boomers calling people snowflakes, people constantly mentioning the “tide pod challenge” to insult Gen Z, etc. It’s when older generations are resentful of children growing up in better times than them or when the different generations just don’t understand each other. This is already touched on a little in the Boruto series, but I’m talking about it being a major theme, so all of that conflict would be amped up to ten.
Granted, this wouldn’t work unless characters from Naruto that were already emotionally attached to are less than perfect parents (this is perfectly fine writing wise, even realistic, but I know a lot of people had problems with it). In fact, the Naruto characters, although not outright villains, would probably be similar to antagonists. Boruto’s generation would want to be taken seriously and be seen as ninja while the older generations would look at them like “kid, you haven’t been to war once and you’ve barely experienced conflict. you don’t know what the word ninja means.” Ideally, this would have a healthy mix of both sides of the conflict (like Naruto looking at Boruto’s screw-ups and becoming doubtful about leaving problems in his hands while Boruto feels like Naruto is magnifying minor mistakes).
I think this would work because:
It continues the theme of breaking the cycle of hatred through understanding because intergenerational resentment is a kind of cycle of hatred
The series would acknowledge that the Naruto characters went through a lot of trauma and screwed up things at a young age
The characters get to acknowledge all the crap they went through and get the chance to work through some of it on screen
It wouldn't be too far off from Boruto and Sarada’s desires to be treated as their own people rather than the son of Naruto and daughter of Sasuke
It would immediately give the next gen a shared relatable and sympathetic motivation
Naruto’s gen (or at least the most prevalent characters from it) could go through an arc about progressing the world without resentment and learning to accept that even without intense pain or trauma children can grow mature, competent adults. This could also play off of the idea of the will of fire.
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