#or pink anime characters in this case

[miraculousninja-345]

Had to deal with some real-world stuff, but I finally got around to finishing these girls and moving onto red!! I actually had to rework Sailor Moon because she was looking a bit wonky before 😅

[mariasont]

I'm so glad you love writing for bimbo reader x Hotch because i love READING them so much 💕

What about reader getting jealous a witness or unsub is flirting with Hotch? Kinda like how the prostitutes are always flirting with Reid but this time it's Hotch getting all awkward and reader misreading it and thinking he's interested back?

Love your stuff!

JEALOUSY, JEALOUSY - A.H

a/n: hi so im so glad you love bimbo reader 🫶🏼🫶🏼🫶🏼 that literally makes me so happy, thank you sm for requesting i hope you like that <3

masterlist

pairings: aaron hotchner x bimbo!assistant!reader

warnings: reader being jelly, kind of out of character for bimbo reader honestly, she’s also a little flustered in this fic which also feels out of character but i kind of like it idk lmk what yall think

wc: 1.2k

The space between her hand and Hotch's bicep was dangerously narrow. She was saying something--something that was way flirtier than the situation required. Matter of fact than any situation required. Your pink nails, the same shade as your favorite bubblegum lip gloss, dug into the flesh of your palm, your lips forming a tight line as you fought the green jealousy that bubbled up like champagne.

It was fine. You were fine.

Until it wasn't.

She flashed a smile at Hotch, one that was undeniably pretty which only served to make your blood boil a degree hotter.

She was stunning, black hair, red lips, perfect skin. You loved yourself, obviously, but it was not in your character to deny that this woman was gorgeous by nature and she was edgeding her chair closer to him.

"Thank you so much for your help today, Agent Hotchner." Her voice had climbed a few pitches in comparison than when she was talking privately with you. "Is it okay if I give you my number, just in case I think of anything else?"

"Of course." Hotch was smiling-- no beaming--at the woman, reaching into his pocket to grab his business card.

Your lashes fluttered up and down is disbelief, jealously rolling off of you in category nine waves. You folded your hands on top of your skirt, cleaning and unclenching until you started to lose feeling in your fingertips.

You're fine, just take a deep breath. Hotch was simply being polite. That's it. But the rationalized thoughts in your head did not match the quicksand feeling in your stomach.

Unfortunately for you, showing and expressing your feelings in an appropriate manner had always been a struggle. Articulating when things were bothering you was a foreign language to you. The other side to this was you had no logical reason to feel the way you did. He was your boss, and you were his assistant. He wasn't your boyfriend. But that fine distinction did nothing to dampen the primal impulse to reach across the desk and drag the woman by her hair. 

That was dramatic, really. It was unfair to project your ugly feelings onto her when in all honestly, in her position, you’d be doing the exact same.

As much as you loved your job and adored your boss, sometimes you wished you didn’t work for him so you could push the boundaries just a little bit when it came to flirting with him.

Thankfully, for the sake of your career, the woman gone before your rash instincts could manifest into action. You needed to get a grip and possibly go reapply your lipstick.

You spent the majority of the day, from that point, avoiding Hotch like the plague. You weren't quite equipped to sift through the emotional chaos brewing inside you, especially when your focus needed to be on getting your tasks done, not on who Hotch might be interested in. It didn't matter if he liked that woman. You could cope. Maybe.

When you did have to come into contact with him, you found yourself acting like a wounded animal. The sight of his face only served to replay that stupid smile he flashed at her. He was probably already in love, daydreaming about their shared life ahead. Their three kids, the white picket fence, maybe even a dog.

You flipped open your makeup mirror, dabbing powder on to your nose and forehead while mentally reminding yourself to pull it together and behave like the grown-up you were supposed to be.

No sooner had you left the bathroom had you crashed into something, legs betraying you as you lurched forward, nearly spiraling to the floor. Your hands shot out, closing around the nearest object which felt to be the lapels of a suit. 

Your gaze snapped into sharp focus. Yes, definitely the lapels of a suit, and not just any suit--It was Hotch's.

Fantastic.

You quickly retracted your hands, letting them hang limply by your sides as you took a cautious step backward.

His brows furrowed, lips tipping downward as he absently adjusted his watch. "You okay?"

"Peachy!”

That was too much.

You attempted to sidestep him, but he anticipated the move. His arm reached out with surprising speed, fastening around your wrist to keep you in place.

"Hey." It was funny how a single word in that deep voice of his was enough to make your heart beat a little faster. "You've been avoiding me all day. I don't want to pry, but if there's something I've done to upset you, I'd like to know so we can clear the air."

"What?" you responded too quickly, avoiding his gaze as your hand went to your neck. "Oh, no, no, it's not you, sir. I just... I think I might be catching a cold or something. Just feeling a bit woozy."

You were definitely coming down with something—it was a green, nasty disease that had your judgement in a clouded haze.

He smiled, making your heart go into overdrive. "You're a terrible liar."

"No idea what you mean." Your voice went up an octave too high. "But, um, there's a bunch of witnesses I need to follow up with. There's this one who was... really eager. Maybe she'd respond better to you?"

There was a pause before Hotch spoke, his voice low and certain. "I've seen many reactions from you, but jealousy? Is that what's happening here?"

You blinked rapidly, heat rising to your cheeks. "Jealous? That's... that's ridiculous."

"I'd like to think I know you better than that." He gave you a deadpan look. "You've been avoiding eye contact, you've been unusually quiet, and I didn't necessarily miss that look you gave her."

You swallowed hard, proving him right and looking anywhere but him as you fidgeted with the hem of your sleeve. 

"It's not... it's just, you know... I don't know, the smile you gave her, it seemed a bit unprofessional to me."

Your words tumbled out in a flustered rush, not capable of taking them back as you realized the absurdity of it all.

Hotch's eyes crinkled as he smiled. "Unprofessional? Did it look like I was flirting? Because that would be a first."

"No, I don't think you were flirting, not exactly." You should stop yourself while you're ahead. "But she was, and you didn't exactly shut it down."

Hotch's face was unreadable. "Honestly, I didn't even realize she was flirting with me. Even so, I'm curious—why would that bother you?"

"Well, I mean, I... It doesn't, not really. I just think we should all be focused, that's all," you managed, voice faltering as you tried to be convincing.

"I assure you, my focus is on all the right places," Hotch said, taking a step closer that almost felt invasive. His gaze dropped to your lips momentarily before snapping back up to your eyes.

"O-okay."

The closeness of him was sending your body into overdrive, the room suddenly feeling too small, his presence way too intense.

"And just for the record," Hotch said over his shoulder as he turned to leave. "If I were to flirt, trust me, it would be with someone who already had all my attention."

taglist: @hotchhner @khxna @readergf @sarcasm-and-stiles @edencherries @aurorsworld @princess76179 @malindacath @freyy253 @broadwaytraaaaash

[makiquas]

Its Butchtober. Bear with me for a second as I rant about children's cartoon ships, butchphobia, the conditional acceptance of butches in sapphic spaces on the basis of desirability, and feeling erased as a butch kid.

It's so funny that I realised early on as a 2000-2010s teen/kid how a lot of so called "sapphics" of social media are really, really anti butch4butch, only by interacting with certain subsets of Catradora and Appledash haters. It may be flippant to connect butchphobia with children's cartoons, but you cannot deny it is there. We finally had two canon butch4butch and masc4masc lesbian animated ships. And the fandoms decided that the best possible reaction to this is to violently hate on the ships for bullshit reasons and write up masterdocs about how the butch character actually looks better with a femme character instead (in both cases–Rarity and Glimmer, who is arguably feminine but not femme, but that's a conversation for another day, how the SPOP fandom waters down gender identities for aesthetics).

This is not just about two cartoon ships; this mindset of seeing two masc lesbians and immediately going "actually they act like bros; but this BUTCHFEMME couple has real chemistry" comes off sounding really, really bad in 2024 when you have no idea how butch identity operates, outside of depicting us as pants-wearing sexually aggressive muscular women. Butches ARE bros, even the ones who kiss each other. Camaraderie and tomboyish swagger *is* a part of their life. It's not our fault you are too fanfic trope-pilled to read these interactions are sexless friendship bantering.

It's also quite concerning, given how there are only a handful of butch4butch books in the market, and almost all of them talk about the stigmatizing of relationships between two butches/studs/masc lesbians. There are many butch lesbians who themselves face internalized butchphobia because of societal standards and expectations of being turned into the "gallant" provider of femmes. Butch and femme are not always inherently complementary, butches can be attracted to other butches, there is no "natural order" model of lesbian/sapphic attraction and your thinly veiled butchphobia is really off-putting, given you guys don't seem to extend that same rhetoric to mascfemme ships like Korrasami or Caitvi, or femme-femme ships like Harlivy.

Here, I must mention relationships like Rei and Kaoru from Oniisama E, or Jess and Lupe from A League of Their Own, who have bucket loads of chemistry but still have some vehement antis only because both the lesbians are masculine. (What's funny is the new wave of lesbian Oniisama E fans are almost all Rei/Kaoru shippers despite the show putting them into two butchfemme pairings.) Something something to be butch4butch is to be failing the tests of palatability and desirability according to conventional models of societal norms. Forever.

Again, one may have valid reasons for disliking these fictional ships (what, I genuinely don't know). But it *is* weird that you guys can watch fifty white fem4fem sapphic shows in a year and read 100+ GL with the same feminine girlish blonde and brunette/pink haired archetype and not bat an eyelid, but conjure a world of made-up "platonic" dynamics just because you read every butch4butch interaction as fundamentally platonic.

A lot of you love to throw around Stone Butch Blues as a catchphrase to educate strangers on the internet about 1950s-70s blue-collar bar culture and USA butch femme history, but how many of you actually know that within the book itself, the lead character acts prejudiced and hates on another butch for being butch4butch? How many of you know that she apologizes to her friend at the end for her hateful remarks? Fun fact: when you ostracize a butch for not fitting into your butch-femme subculture aesthetic, you're no better than lesbiphobic bigots actually.

Anyway, here are some butch4butch resources if you are a baby butch4butch and feel alienated by these kinds of weird rhetoric in online and fandom queer spaces too:

Butch4Butch romance books

My Butch4Butch books masterdoc (**being updated regularly**)

Leo Wilder's Butch4Butch writing (18+)

Butch4Butch photography archive (insta)

Boyish² Butch4Butch yuri anthology (insta)

@milsae Butch4Butch artist (tumblr/insta)

This post is made by a trans masc butch of color. Terfs, racists, biphobes and radfems kindly do not derail or interact.

[picturejasper20]

Steven Universe as a character is someone who has been mischaracterized and flanderized over the years, to the point people who aren't into the fandom or haven't watched the show believe that mischaracterization to be a fact rather that a product that comes from memes and jokes

The truth is that Steven often fights in the series when it is needed, usually by fusing with someone else like Connie or Amethyst since he is still developing his powers in the original series. He doesn't cry when he has to fight back or defend himself, with exception if the person attacking is someone he considers a friend. Because, yes, for a 14-15 old teenager it isn't fun having to do something like that and it can be traumatic.

He also doesn't start to cry the moment someone refuses to change their mind or is being mean. He often isn't afraid to be sarcastic or call that person out. He didn't cry when Aquamarine mocked him in ¨Stuck Together¨ nor when Jasper didn't apologize for poofing Amethyst in ¨Crack the Whip¨

However, what we see is sometimes him blaming himself for not being able to help people that, more often than not, have been hurt by Rose Quartz, his mother, in some way. After Season 3, Steven fears a lot that he is going to become like Rose and he is going to hurt people the way like she did.

In general Steven deals with an Atlas complex in the show. He feels like he has to fix his mother mistakes and deal with ¨what she left behind¨ even when Rose wanted for him to be his own person as seen in the tape she left for him as it was revealed in the episode ¨Lion 4: The Alternate Ending¨.

Steven also defines his identity a lot for being to help other people and fix their problems. He believes that he has to be ¨useful¨ for others. So when he believes that he failed to help someone, that may lead him to think that he isn't living up to his ¨purpose¨ or that he is a failure as a person.

In reality, he isn't that much different from other hero protagonists from other animated shows. Those who are kind and emphatic and willing to listen to other people and give them a second chance if the person changes their ways. You probably like an animated show that has a protagonist like this. (Who was probably taken inspiration from Steven if the series came out after SU).

The main difference, i think, is that Steven goes a bit more than those protagonists do when it comes to listening to other people, understand their motivations and give them another chance if they regret their actions. A lot has to do with how he is aware that his enemies (usually gems) act the way the do because of the system they were born into rather ¨they are evil just because¨. He gets that their motivations come from the system that hurt them or lead them to believe that their actions are justified.

Another common mischaracterization is that Steven becomes super buddies with every person he helps...when this isn't always the case. There are some occasions that Steven shows discomfort around people who he has given a second chance. Just because he gives them a second chance doesn't mean that he immediately considers them close friends, maybe allies at best.

A good example of this is the gif above of Steven's interactions with White Diamond in ¨Homeworld Bound¨. White Diamond touches Steven very close to where his gem is- which makes Steven distressed since in his battle again White, she ripped his gem out to prove that Pink was still ¨alive¨. In most of the episode Steven shows to be very uncomfortable around the Diamonds and Spinel, to some extent. They bring him bad memories, which is the main reason he has been doing everything to avoid going to them to ask for their help until this point in Steven Universe Future. He even almost accidentally hurts White's gem by smashing her head against a pillar when she lets him control her to talk to himself. This being result of a intrusive ¨vengeful¨ thought.

I wouldn't say that Steven hates the Diamonds,but- he doesn't want to be their friend neither and wants to avoid in general because he feels nervous and bad around them. It's something like ¨I'm glad that you are changing but i don't want to be associated with you. Please, i would appreciate if you kept your distance from me.¨ dynamic.

On last point, Steven is someone who usually pushes his feelings down in certain situations and buries them down, which has led him to have strong emotional outbursts in bad moments. He usually prefers to ignore his own problems and take priority on others. Again, this comes a lot from his desire to be useful and be needed, making him trying to ignore how he feels about certain people and pretend that he is doing fine.

This explains why we don't see him lash out that much to others in the original series, and, why he feels so frustrated and angry in Future, since all that anger and negative feelings can't no longer be ignored as they used to and they are having a negative impact in Steven's mental health. This, of course, isn't meant to be seen is a healthy coping mechanism. It is in fact potrayed as something pretty self-destructive for Steven, as a huge flaw of his, that over time he comes to learn that it isn't the best way for him to deal with his problems.

These are some of the most common misconceptions i have seen about Steven's character online. I could go in more depth with some of them but i think the points should be clear enough. This could be considered a general analysis of how Steven is as a character and how he operates, leaving aside more specific things that can be covered in other posts.

[14dayswithyou]

Meowdy Saint 😼

I got goth vibes and so does my AngelOC, Elodie. So it's funny to imagine this pink boy who is secretly an emo boy in disguise next to a wednesday addams esque babe lmao. Poor boy miscalculated, I like that there was an option to be like 'Oh I like that goth style' at the cafe.

But this raises a question! Would he drop the Ren persona and aesthetic if he realized it wasn't totally necessary?

⌞♥⌝ This has been answered multiple times in the past, but yes, he'd drop the light academia aesthetic if Angel wasn't into it! ^^

However, from a game dev standpoint, it'd be extremely difficult for me to include a bunch of types and aesthetics in hopes of making Ren's appearance feel more inclusive for everyone, so it's easier for me to say, "Oh, Angel likes this one anime character" and build the lore around that.

So, for those who like Ren's real appearance and would've preferred if he introduced himself as [REDACTED] (instead of his Haruko persona), I hear you!! ^^

But please understand that if that were the case, the 14DWY storyline would be a lot less interesting and would defeat the entire purpose of Ren's motives. A big part of his characterisation is that he's more than willing to alter every part of himself to become Angel's ideal type, and if their type happened to be [REDACTED], then it'd make the buildup to his reveal in Day ??? feel far less anticlimactic.

[byoldervine]

How To Always Have Writing Ideas…

For A New Story:

1. Keep a list. Any time you have one of those sudden bursts of inspiration in the middle of writing a separate story, don’t quit your current WIP or pretend you’ll ‘just remember it’, put it into a separate list. You can always go back to this later on

2. Writing prompts. Look them up, use random word generators, pick a random object you can see, whatever helps you come up with any idea at all. Write a few paragraphs. Can it evolve from there?

3. People watch. Go to a public place and make up backstories for the strangers you come across. That man in the hat is using it to hide his elf ears. That woman with the bright pink hair didn’t dye it, she’s secretly the main character of an anime trying to dodge all the tropes and cliches. That toddler is actually a guardian angel reincarnated to watch over their new baby sibling. What brings them to this place? Where did they come from? Where are they going next?

To Continue An Existing Story:

1. Act it out. Say the words aloud, act out what your characters are doing, get props or people to act off of if you need to. See what feels like the most natural progression of the moment

2. Coffee shop AU, or other substitutional one-shot. Good for establishing dynamics between two or more characters, or even just working out a lone character’s day-to-day. Just write a few paragraphs about your characters entering a coffee shop or similar appropriate establishment/ordinary location. What do they do? What do they order to eat/drink? What do they say to each other? How do they treat the staff and other customers? If all else fails, write what they do after they leave, as if it were an ordinary day for them

3. Rubber duck it. This is something programmers use to work out where they went wrong in their code, but I’ve found it can work for figuring out story stuff as well. What you do is get a rubber duck, or any other object of focus, and start explaining your problem to it out loud. In this case you can read your chapter to the duck, or even give it the full run-down of the plot so far. Warning; side effects may include getting frustrated that the problem was right in front of you and subsequently throwing the duck

For Both:

1. Writing graveyards. I talked a bit about them in a previous post, but writing graveyards are basically just the folder you store your deleted scenes in instead of yeeting them into the void. Reread those, see if they have anything you can recontextualise or repurpose

2. Combine ideas. My WIP Byoldervine is a combination of two separate plots I had that I realised I’d be able to combine - twice. I first realised I could put together my ‘angel and demon heroes protecting humans from a war between heaven and hell’ story and my ‘quest through the fantasy realm to find the ingredients to a cure for a dying god’ story into the same universe as two sides of the same story as a duology. Then I realised I could just remove a few characters, tweak a few plot points and mash them completely together into one book. Combining them works wonders and minimises worldbuilding

3. Go out with friends or family. I guarantee that the one time you’ll be flooded with inspiration is when you don’t have an opportunity to write it down

[ophanstears]

Undertale YELLOW ReImagined!

I wanted to put my own spin on how the cast of UTY would look in my style! :) I'm new to pixel art, and I had a blast trying it out! [Just to clarify, this is NOT an attempt to "fix" UTY's designs; I have immense respect for all the artists and developers working on UTY, and their work is incredible! I LOVE the cast, their animations, art and designs! This is all just for fun!] A ton more thoughts and comparison under the Read More! if you feel like reading a lot.

Flowey the Flower: I gave Flowey flushed, freckled cheeks and a tooth gap to make him look cuter and more approachable! Just a ruse, though - fluster him enough, and he might revert to that typical pale face and frown.

Clover: Clover is the iconic player character of the game so I changed as little as possible. I simply adjusted some colors and added details, including the adorable blush they have in a lot of promo art!

Dalv: I aimed to showcase Dalv's lightning powers through his design, so I gave him glowing horns and some subtle markings, including a pinkish nose. <3 While he’s originally based on Vlad, I added some minotaur elements because they really suit him. I Like in the original story, the minotaur trapped in a maze, unsure of what else is out there.

Martlet: I'll be honest, I saw some art of chubby Martlet and was inspired. To bring her passion for woodworking across, I gave her some tight but comfy overalls! She has some cool goggles that she always forgets to wear when flying - typical Martlet! Since a martlet is said to be a bird that never rests or settles, I gave her some cool glowly ghost legs! They're translucent!

Starlo: I revamped Starlo's cape by changing the patterns and adding tassels! I also removed the piece of wheat sticking to his hat because, honestly, I tend to forget to draw it. ^^* The inner fabric of his cape has a fun star pattern, tying into his previous obsession with space! And of course, big boots!

Ceroba: I made Ceroba a bit furry-like and taller, sort of to mirror Toriel! I wanted to give her a more traditional kimono with beautiful patterns, and I added eyebags to make her look a bit tired. She also has large paws now; I considered giving her sandals but ultimately decided against it.

Axis: To be honest I wanted to push his design even further but!!! Then it wouldn't be Axis anymore! :( I kept most of his original features but added some pink highlights. His antennae now have pointy tips, resembling bunny ears! I couldn’t resist the idea of a fox monster creating a bunny robot to apprehend humans - it’s just too cute! He's also taller now for intimidation factor and in case a larger human comes along.

And that's all! Thank you so much if you made it this far! More is to come soon! :) here is a wip!

I also have an AU in the works! And lots and lots of art!!!

[schrodinger-swriter]

The main cast of Hazbin hotel on Valentine's day

I know I may be a little late. I had to do some shopping today and hadn't had the motivation or time to get down and write until now! I apologize is some characters are given more writing than others... the truth is that I am bised for some characters or simply have more for them. :C

Regardless I hope you enjoy these, I likely won't do these large posts very often.

CHARLIE:

I hope you can forgive me for being a little short on Charlie's part, I had stated earlier what she would do for the holiday in an alphabet post! But to recap she makes you a mixtape with songs dedicated to you, songs made by her and songs she knows you like! The case is handmade too, covered in hearts as well as having a hand written note inside further expressing her affections for you. She would also give you some of your favorite candies! Expect to go out and do something fun and romantic too!

VAGGIE:

Much lower compared to her canon partner, Vaggie is not much of an enjoyer of the holiday. She keeps her thoughts to it to herself, though sometimes you might find her grumbling about all the pink and the red. She just doesn't enjoy the aesthetic all that much. However despite that she will still participate if she knows it will make her significant other happy! She would get you something small, like a stuffed animal and some flowers.

ANGEL DUST:

Respectfully stealing this idea from my mutual, but he already gets so many gifts and cards from his crazed horny fans. He hardly has the room for any more! Though.. he probably sells a lot of it for some extra cash, only keeping some of the candies. If you get him something, he probably wouldn't sell it. He's actually touched. In terms of what he does for you, he might treat you to a night full of him... in more ways than one if you're open to it. If you don't feel like going out he's fine with staying inside and watching some movies in his rooms... perhaps it's a deserved break after a rough day during the love season.

ALASTOR:

Similar to Vaggie, Alastor wouldn't do much. He understands the purpose of the holiday, but he simply. Does not care for it all that much. However I do rather enjoy the though of Alastor sending letters to his friends (Mimzy, Rosie, Niffty, ect). He even puts them in fancy envelopes and seals them with wax. How nice is that? If he can, he might even send a box of chocolates. Fingers, in Rosie's case. However, he doesn't do much to celebrate outside of that. That's assuming he sends anything at all, anyway.

SIR PENTIOUS:

He would go all out. He might even make a machine dedicated to you and gift it. He makes a mechanical heart that beats and gives it to you. He gives you all of the candy he can get his hands on, not exactly sure what you prefer. He takes you out for the night, to the nicest restaurant he can go to without getting jumped (because let's be honest... his days of trying to pick fights and climb to power has probably landed him with some enemies...). He's a total gentleman on the date, opening the door for you and pushing in your chair for you. Considering he's a little flustered that he is on a date with you, everything goes smoothly.

HUSKER:

He likes to stay in, but you can count that if you manage to get him to go out it's going to be a to a club or bar. Anywhere with alcohol. He'd much rather prefer a bar, since it's usually... lower in energy. He also isn't much of a Valentine's person, and he does show his disdain. He does tone down on talking negatively about the day around you, so there's that at least. A simple night in with an affirmation of love is enough for Husk.

NIFFTY:

She bakes you something and perhaps sews you something. A red throw pillow in the shape of a heart. Though you may have to tell her that's what you want because otherwise she's going to try something akin to the roach crown.... shivers... The baked goods are actually pretty good, and you'll be snacking on them for the rest of the week due to Niffty getting too excited and making too many. She will stab someone with a needle if they try to take one without asking you first.

LUCIFER:

He also goes all out, it might actually be a little overwhelming! He can conjure nearly anything he can think of, if his song was being literal! He wants to make sure you're loved, and that there's no possible way that you would ever think otherwise. Despite this he might rather stay inside, or maybe alter the home to look more fancy to make a mock dinner. Generally very sweet and you will be drowning in gifts from the second you wake up to the minute you go to sleep. He also makes you breakfast in bed.

[lala-blahblah]

Something is on the tip of my tongue about gender in Ace Attorney but I'm just not quite there yet... I'm coming at this from the original trilogy only, but there's this interplay about men being allowed to transcend the typical masculine roles. Take the emphasis on fathers for example. Edgeworth's father was his most important relationship, he appeared to be raising Edgeworth as a single parent as a mother is never mentioned. Then he gets adopted by Von Karma and again, no mother in the picture, but it isn't even commented on as odd or strange. The nuclear family is not emphasized, there isn't a single character who has one (Maya lost her mom and her dad left, Pearl was raised by her mother and by the community as a whole, Nick's family is never really mentioned). You instead have men as the sole caregiver and also a career man.

Nick is never feminized by the story in an undermining way (besides the comment about him having a pink phone when he showed Maya's voice recording as evidence) but his character traits are ones that are often associated with women. He is a caregiver, he watches over children and does well with them, he is in tune with the emotions of people around him. He is a protector but not in the physical sense which is much more common for men and seen as heroic. It is true that he often is a protector of young girls which does emphasize a paternal ideal, BUT he notably protects Edgeworth as well who is more of a typical masculine figure comparatively, at least in how he hides his emotions and is seen as more of an intellectual figure (BUT LET'S BE REAL he still has stuff going on). So it isn't all paternalistic, he just genuinely can save the entire world with his emotional intelligence. Like because he cared so deeply and openly he was able to protect Edgeworth in that case, so his caring nature is outright celebrated rather than poked fun at.

And the more physical characters are all women actually! I mean Franziska comes to mind of course who literally carries a weapon with her, and Pearl will slap Nick when she's really angry, meanwhile I don't think any of the men (besides the killers) take physical action? And Nick is actually repeatedly shown to be an emotional person who is a bit of a softy, like him crying in Mia's flashback case with him in college or in elementry school when he was falsely accused, but also when he tears up a little at Desiree DeLite telling him how she and Ron fell in love. IDK there's something so neat about that! And his whole character motivation to take care of and fix the people around him instead of focusing on himself is something I think you more frequently see examples of women dealing with due to gendered expectations, so that is also really interesting to see come from a male character. It's just really neat and I think there's something else there I just can't quite get at it. Maybe it's a work in translation thing? I don't interact with a lot of eastern media so maybe this is typical in anime and the like. I love it so much though, it is so refreshing. Because often the more emotional men are ones that need to be saved but he is both savior and someone with big feelings.

[alexanderwales]

A writing idea I've been mulling is that of internal contradictions vs external contradictions. It's very possible that this just boils down to "Man vs Nature" and "Man vs Self", but perhaps slightly more specific.

The idea is that we give a character everything they say they want, then they find that it's not all it's cracked up to be, and that there are two broad genres here. The classic example of this is the movie Big, where a kid wishes he was a grown up. He initially enjoys it, then had to deal with some adult bullshit, and goes back to being a kid. So the standard is:

I want [this] -> I get [this] -> it's initially good -> turns out it's not what I wanted (yet)

But in the case of Big, and a bunch of other movies like it, there's some hidden aspect of [this] that has revealed itself. The idea of [this] was a naïve one.

There's a different version, which is mostly the same, which goes like this:

I want [this] -> I get [this] -> wow did I not actually understand [this] -> turns out [this] is still good, but for different reasons than I thought

Or a slightly different version:

I want [this] -> I get [this] -> wow did I not understand [this] -> turns out that my very presence or effort was enough to make a new/better [this] that does get me what I initially wanted

So here are our three types, with some examples, to make sure that I understand what the hell I'm talking about. I am going to use "weeaboo goes to Japan" as my example, because I think it's funny, relatively inoffensive, and something I haven't seen done in a fiction context:

Return - A weeaboo goes to Japan, realizes that anime lied to him, has various adventures, and returns home, having changed and given up his weeaboo ways

Adaptation - A weeaboo goes to Japan, realizes that anime lied to him, has various adventures, and comes to appreciate Japan as it actually exists

Synthesis - A weeaboo goes to Japan, realizes that anime lied to him, had various adventures, and the people he's met enjoy and appreciate his infectious enthusiasm enough that he changes ... maybe just a small town, to be slightly more realistic

Internal Contradictions

A different approach, which I'm not sure I've ever seen, is one where we follow a path like this:

I want [this] -> I get [this] -> wait, it turns out that [this] is just fundamentally incoherent and in tension with itself, and in fact [this] does not and cannot exist

I hope you agree that this is different from any of the above. It's not a fiction that our protagonist gets disappointed about. It's that the protagonist gets everything he wanted, and finds out that's not actually what he wanted. So this is our new class:

4. Contradiction - A weeaboo goes to Japan, realizes the anime was real all along, meets some hot pink-haired girl who is very into him, is lauded by all the otaku that bow to his superior knowledge, finds that this is ultimately a shallow, hollow kind of life that he does not in reality enjoy.

If the central idea of external contradiction is "reality isn't like that", then the central idea of internal contradiction is "the idea falls apart under its own weight".

I think to do this, you have to really understand the idea and its own internal contradictions, and it needs to have internal contradictions. If someone gets the unrealistic thing that they always wanted, maybe they're just happy! Maybe the unrealistic thing could never exist in the real world, but can be found in a fantasy. No, for this idea to work, we need a fantasy that falls apart on its own, and not in a malevolent genie way where someone immediately says "well obviously I didn't mean it like that".

A guy who wants to be loved by everyone. He gets his wish, everyone loves him. Lots of options for what the internal contradiction is, and I think it depends on the nature of the fantasy, but "they love me but do not know me, so their love rings hollow" is a good example, and I'm not sure even a benevolent genie could fix that without creating more problems. "They love me and they know me perfectly" is, I think, also the kind of thing that people would freak out about, since they know all the bad stuff, the things that our protagonist wouldn't want people to know, that he glosses over about himself.

A guy wants his country to have perfect freedom of expression, but also wants dogmatic adherence to specific ideas. These cannot both exist, so the whole thing must tear itself apart and be rebuilt with compromise.

A guy wants a woman who is strong and independent and speaks her mind, and also a woman who goes along with whatever he wants. He wants her to be sexually adventurous and also virginal. This is a case of external contradiction, where such a woman does not exist in large quantities and is extremely unrealistic. But some formulations are also internal contradictions, depending on how the story is told.

There's something that these all have in common with each other, which is that there are at least two things which are in tension. Maybe you would even say that this tension makes them external to each other. But I think that this is something that's often true about human desire: we want things that are in tension with each other.

For this to work within a story, I think your protagonist has to be a bit of an absolutist, someone who isn't willing to compromise, because most of the examples I've been able to think of do have compromise solutions, where you give up a little of one thing and a little of the other and meet in the middle. Sometimes, this means acceptance.

I'm not entirely sold on this analysis. I think that it's hard to find examples I couldn't argue are some different kind of external contradiction, or a dumbass genie.

One of the examples I was thinking of was Click, where the protagonist wishes for (primarily) the ability to get through all the boring parts of life, and we see how this comes into conflict with his desire to be a father ... but isn't this an example of Return? He does, in fact, return to his life before he got the magical remote. So there's an obvious internal contradiction, but the film just says "actually, you would hate that, it wouldn't be like how you thought it was".

So I've felt like this post was half-baked, but it's been baking for what feels like months, sitting in drafts, and I cannot bake it anymore. Hopefully it does not fall apart under its own internal contradictions, because that would be quite the blunder.

[xjackjackx]

Hints towards future AVA characters

In case someone doesn't know, several hours ago Alan dropped a new newsletter as part of the free subscription you can get. Which included a new teaser for AVA:

Obviously, it's a Newgrounds page showing several animations. Out of curiosity and to see if we can get any lore, I checked Newgrounds to see which animations are real, and which were made up for AVA 11. This is the result:

To start out, the Reds. The ones we know are real videos up on Newgrounds. It's worth to note that the newest episode here is from December 2006. Not only does this prove this is a Victim origin, it also gives us a date on what's the earliest moment Victim could've escaped onto the Outernet, and proves it was just one month after Chosen's creation (Nov 2006). So here is some timeline-building.

Now, the Purples. I looked through Newgrounds, and couldn't find any animation or game to match these searches. They could be real, or they could be made by Alan for AVA. Here's a list for anyone who wants to help:

1 - Bathroom

2 - Alfred Pokingstick

3 - An American Action Movie (which shows up twice for some reason)

4 - Deep Creatures: The Game

5 - Build Me Up Buttercup

6 - Coldplay - Yellow

7 - Daft Punk Collab

8 - Dead Dude

9 - Crimson Pistols

10 - Bad Flash Kills

And to end things off, the Blues. Animations that were very likely created purely for AVA and might be important characters in AVA 11. The list is:

1 - Mitsi. She(?) seems to have long hair, so we might get the second female stick in the whole series behind Pink.

2 - Silly Steven. He looks EXACTLY like the sticks at the beginning of The Box, so he's very likely lore important.

3 - The Shepard. It's worth to note the previous teaser showed a bunch of sheep, so if he's been teased twice then he's likely very important.

... they're all going to fucking die in Dark's internet rampage won't they.

[longsufferingcritic]

The Light Fury: A Needlessly Thorough Character Design Analysis

Let me start by admitting I'd actually quite like the Light Fury's design if only it were completely removed from the context of HTTYD. If I saw the piece of concept art below in a freelance artist's portfolio, I'd think it's wonderful; same with a lot of the fanart I've seen. And for the record, I also have a soft spot for SilkWings from the Wings of Fire series and Skydancers from Flight Rising, so it's not like I expect every dragon design to be spiky and ferocious-looking.

But in the HTTYD films specifically, dragons being spiky and ferocious-looking is consistently a key part of the art direction, so the Light Fury looks extremely out of place compared to literally all the other dragons. Toothless was always somewhat sleeker and more mammal-ish than the other dragon species, true, but not to such a jarring extent. Unlike the rest of her kind (Toothless included), the Light Fury has completely smooth skin with no textured scales or spikes; all her features (even her teeth!) are completely rounded with no pointy or rough edges; her wings are shaped more like a seabird's than a bat's; her tail fins are distinctly heart-shaped; and she literally has pink glitter on her hide, for fuck's sake. Juxtaposed to the films' art style for every other dragon species, she sticks out like a sore thumb, hardly even resembling a dragon at all -- more like an alien invader from Planet Gender Roles.

…Yeah, about that. In the art book the filmmakers explicitly stated that they didn't want her to look reptilian like other dragons, because she's a feeeeemaaaaale and therefore has to look like one. Never mind the fact that the other female dragons in the films like Stormfly and Meatlug have never had that issue.

So let me be blunt: the Light Fury's visual design is misogynistic. She is designed with the sole purpose of being "feminine" and "pretty" as a male character's love interest, and on top of defying the films' art direction just to make her more conventionally beautiful, her design checks off the majority of the clichés used to impose human gender stereotypes onto animated female animals: lighter color, blue eyes, heavily rounded features, smaller paws/claws and nose/snout, less cartoony exaggeration, and an inexplicable smoothness in the way she is drawn/rendered. (Once you're consciously aware of those clichés, you'll start noticing them in nearly every animated animal film, so HTTYD is far from unique in that regard… but that just makes this widespread pattern in Hollywood all the more concerning.)

All these design choices are also counterproductive to her supposed narrative purpose of being the "wild and untamed" foil to the "domesticated" Toothless -- if that's the case, shouldn't she look more reptilian and ferocious, not less? Many of her traits like big blue eyes and a short rounded snout are actually associated with domestication, so shouldn't she resemble a wild animal instead? Nah, gender roles are clearly the priority here.

And no, despite the popular fan theories, the filmmakers have never confirmed or even hinted that the Light Fury is aquatic or based off belugas. The head of character animation has stated that the design was largely inspired by snow leopards as a contrast to Toothless having been inspired by black panthers; this is more evident in a piece of early concept art which depicts her as pale gray with a dappled pattern, but she ultimately ended up being pure iridescent white, very far removed from the most recognizable features of snow leopards. Reportedly this was because leopard spots look too much like scars, and scars are obviously unbecoming of a giiiiirl dragon… you can't make this shit up!

Axolotls were also cited as an influence, which would explain the smooth skin and unbroken dorsal sail, but the extreme smoothness still grossly clashes with the rest of the films' dragon designs and her own supposed personality so I don't think that actually justifies it. It's also worth noting that axolotl features are much more apparent in the below piece of concept art, with gill-like head appendages and cleft wings to match, but those didn't make it into the final design either, because I guess anything even slightly pointy-looking isn't "female" enough. (Terns were the final cited inspiration, which purportedly explains why her wings couldn't have a batty shape like literally every other dragon in the films.)

As I've said before, if they just wanted to have the black/white contrast for the night/day yin/yang motif (which isn't necessarily a bad idea on its own) the least they could do is still make the Light Fury look properly dragon-like even with white scales. There have been tons of fanmade drawings and edits of what that might look like, as well as examples of well-designed white dragons both in the films themselves (Valka's Bewilderbeast) and other media (Queen Snowfall my beloved).

So why does this all matter? Is a crappy design really that important? I'd argue yes, because despite many fans looking at the franchise through rose-tinted glasses, HTTYD has never treated its female characters particularly well, and the Light Fury is the most obvious/egregious culmination of that. In addition to the sexist tropes in her visual design, she exists for the sole purpose of being Toothless's beautiful love interest and "call of the wild" to separate him from his human best friend, with no depth to her character -- "Why is she so wild/aggressive to humans?" and "How has Grimmel's cruelty affected her?" are just two examples of basic character development points the film is uninterested in exploring -- and almost no screen time to herself. She doesn't even get a canon name, supposedly because she's just so wild, but all three of her children get names despite being equally wild so that's just a cop-out. (And even if she would never live with humans, Berkians could have still referred to her by a nickname, since real wild animals are often nicknamed by the locals who see them or the zoologists who study them -- shoutout to my favorite California Condor, 1099 "Yarrow".)

This is all part of widespread misogynistic patterns in fiction: animated films designing female animals with human gender stereotypes in mind, and fiction in general constantly mistreating and neglecting female characters. I love the HTTYD films so much, but at the same time, there are some aspects that legitimately warrant criticism, and misogyny is definitely one of them… and the Light Fury exemplifies that better than anything.

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

I don't know but couldn't that maybe the reason twst gave Leona the feminine version of the name instead of the masculine version is because of the Japanese pronunciation is easier for Leona? (I have no clue about japanese pronunciation but sometimes I feel they find some names in English hard to pronunce in Japanese)

[Referencing this post and this post!]

I don’t think it’s a matter of difficulty in pronunciation; Twisted Wonderland has far more complex names (like Leona’s surname) and words for the VAs to say. Merely slapping on an extra sound (-a) at the end of a name doesn’t drastically make the difficulty spike in most cases, Japanese or not. (If anything, the r/l sound starting off his name is the most complex of the sounds in his name; vowels by comparison are easy.)

This also doesn’t explain why other characters have names usually perceived as feminine in the west (Lilia, Jade, etc.)—though I’d like to point out that the -a at the end of names usually indicates femininity in romance languages like Italian. It doesn’t carry the same connotation in Japanese, so maybe the -a at the end wasn’t intentionally meant to convey femininity.

I guess it’s just a design choice the team went with?? There doesn’t need to be a deep reason for it.

We don’t necessarily equate irl logic to fictional characters though! So even if men have longer lashes than women in the real world, our brain doesn’t overlay that over this silly cartoon or anime character.

A lot of this also has to do with socialization and what you’re exposed to growing up. A TON of media—especially in the west—has certain visual indicators for femme characters. For example, the color pink, bows, makeup, curvier bodies, boobs, long hair, fancier designs, etc. See the images below:

We’re more likely to base our understanding of fictional characters’ gender identities based on other media we have consumed. This is especially true the more unrealistic the fictional character is. Like, I doubt many are seeing an anthro rabbit and comparing her lashes to those of their actual guys they know irl.

With Japanese culture now blowing up in recent years, a lot more “normies” are getting into it. And what is the kind of media normies are used to seeing and basing their judgement on prior to getting into anime?? That’s right, the very same cartoons and such that instilled those “femme indicators” in them. Even within preexisting anime fans, we tend to assume long lashes + makeup indicates a female character, an effeminate or pretty boy, or even queer-coded.

[kezzamjam]

Mane Six Redesign! 🌟 + Finalized Cutie Mark Redesigns!

these ponies are the only things keeping me sane during this insane time guys! hope they can help u too if you’re having a tough time^^

Some notes about their designs below if you’re interested! :D

Finally redesigned their cutiemarks! I wanted them to be as intricate as their cutie mark story! I tried to make them match my style as well, cause the originals didn’t really fit too well in my interpretations. these will probably be the ones i use from now on!

Twilight of course has her iconic blunt cut, I think the ponytail suits her straight to the point, sarcastic but loving and fun personality in the first season! her hair will slowly start to loosen into a low tied back ponytail as she learns the magic of friendship :’) if you saw my Older Mane Six Redesigns you can see what I mean! She also has birthmarks around her chest and horn! While marks are seen in Pegasi usually, they are seen in Unicorns in rare cases. When she becomes an Alicorn, creatures mistakenly think she was born a Pegasus.

I feel like Applejack, in her traditional country girl style would have a longer mane than originally! I gave her Pear Butter’s hair texture, and though she doesn’t really know how to maintain it, she keeps it long in honor of her mother. But! she does keep it braided to keep it out of the way. Vitiligo bc I think it would be common among Earth Ponies, supposedly mirroring the way sun dances on the soil.It also is what causes her freckles! Also, I made her hair similar to the shape of a bitten apple! I think it rly suits her as the CORE (pun intended) apple! :p

Fluttershy!! Shorter mane/tied up bc the animals always try to claw and tangle themselves in it. Her silhouette is meant to juxtapose Dash’s, despite their similar design choices! (ie similar length manes, tails, both pegasus ofc) this is to really emphasize the fact that Pegasi come in so many varieties! When people say she should have just been an Earth Pony makes me so sad, bc that’s the whole point! She isn’t your typical pegasus but we love her for it! Multiple pink shades in her mane to mirror Celestia, as many ponies later point out her likeness to her— I also think it’s an interesting point of what exactly is the beauty standard in Equestria! Fluttershy has often been remarked as very beautiful, and I’d like to think her similarity to the Princess is part of that. She also has hoof marks on her! All pegasi do and in rare cases, they relate directly to their future cutie mark!

RARITY MY DIVA !!!! Ofc had to give her the most luxurious mane of all. She has a curly hair type, and is arguably the only one of the Mane Six who knows how to properly care for her hair type 😭 don’t worry! she teaches her friends and it’s wonderful (i wonder who i mentioned earlier that rly needs her help…. 💎🍎…..) I wanted her to invoke the feeling of the original myths of unicorns, with their lankiness and long, flowing white coats. She was actually my first redesign all the way back in august, and the only one i haven’t changed! I love her more than anything.

Pinkie Pie was lowk the hardest for me because of her monotonous color palette 😭 but I didn’t want to change it bc she is simply!!! iconic!!!! I enjoy the designs of the original mane six and just wanted to alter elements of the designs rather then entirely recreate the characters from the ground up. She has very tight coily hair (my poc queen 🤞🤞) and decorates it with her favorite confetti! and sometimes frosting >< Gave her highlights to better see the shapes in her mane. And ofc gave her more blue accents! I think it’s so understated that she has two iconic colors in her palette and no one takes about it

And finally, Rainbow Dash! Dashie was so much fun bc I had such a clear vision for her. I wanted that sweet lightning bolt motif, both cause I think she would have a cut specifically for dazzling up her flying skills, but also to mirror AJ’s hair motifs! (for u appledashies out the ;3) and also because they’re always head to head, but rly they go hoof in hoof together and compliment their softer friends so well. Dash’s scars on her wings are from her first sonic rainboom! She was very lucky to have it heal stinger than before, and was the only filly to ever do so. Her Pegasi hoof marks are actually very plain, which is why she tattooed over them! she had them done is the same style of her cutie mark, and actually got one of her hoof wings tattooed white too. Speaking of her cutie mark, I wanted it to feel like the sonic rainboom really left an impression on her physically, dancing on her coat, forever with her :) it also, to dash’s enjoyment, is rad as heck!!

thank u for reading if u made it this far, and I can’t wait to draw these designs some more!!! x3

[metafurrikitty]

i've never liked how pokemon always looked the same except for some cases in the anime where they needed characters to not get confused. like realistically wouldn't they have a slight variety of patterns, hues, eye colors, fluff levels??

anyway i decided to make edits of the eeveelutions because this was bothering me. i also wrote headcanons i have about them so here it is

eevee's can come in darker or lighter shades of brown, and have a variety of cream and/or dark brown markings including spots, stripes, and points. some species of eevee have cream tufts of fur in their ears. the length and thickness of their fur can vary depending on their climate. they can also have lop ears. depending on what they evolve into, all of these traits can carry over into their eeveelution.

vaporeons may have a dorsal fin on its tail depending on its species and where its from. certain climates require faster or easier turns in the water, which results in them evolving this additional fin. they may also have fins on their forearms and legs. despite them being sort of blubber-y, vaporeons can appear fluffier if they are from a colder environment. of all patterns, they most often have spots and stripes like a tiger shark. they can have purple, pink, or blue eyes. when a lop eared eevee evolves into a vaporeon, their ear-like fins are lower.

like the domestic cats that they resemble, espeons have a wide variety of purple hues and patterns. they also have many different shapes of forehead gems, sometimes even being a heart. people speculate horoscopes for the shape of an espeons forehead gem in relation to their personalities, but none of it is professor oak approved. their tail can be split at diffurent points from the base of the tail to the very end of it. on rare occasions, an espeon will have two tails or one tail that is ever so slightly split at the end. an espeons eyes can be purple, pink, or blue. when a lop eared eevee evolves into espeon, it is not very noticeable as espeons ears are more cat-like as compared to the rest of the eeveelutions.

flareons can grow a lot of head fur, which is fun to cut into different haircuts. in the wild, a flareon will simply burn the extra hair off if it gets too long. (unsure of this since that would mean it is not fireproof, but whatever) they can have lots of patterns as well, especially point patterns and stripes. their orange and yellow coat can vary in darkness and hue as well, and although blue is most common, their eyes can be lots of different colors.

umbreons have the longest canines of all the eeveelutions, and sometimes they can be big enough to poke out from their mouths when closed. an umbreons rings also vary a lot, and can be anywhere on their bodies as long as they are symmetrical. they can also sometimes have freckles in the same color as their rings. even though they are black, they can have patterns that are visible in the light, including stripes, spots and points. their eyes can be red, brown, orange, or pink. umbreons sometimes grow a hyena-like mane along its head and back.

sylveons can have any number of bows on any part of their bodies, though the most typical places are at the base of the tail, the front or back of the neck, the ears, and the top of the head. multiple ribbons can grow from a sylveon's bow, and they can be all kinds of lengths at rest. the ribbon colors of pink, blue and cyan can be in any different order. they can have pink markings including stripes, spots and points. a sylveons widows peak can dip very low or not at all. their eyes can be blue, pink or purple.

jolteons can sometimes have longer tails depending on their species. the size of the spines on their back also varies a lot, and they can grow as the jolteon gets older. they most often have orange stripes, but can also have spots and points. they will have white markings sometimes, too. sometimes they have markings in the shape of a lightning bolt. a jolteons eyes can be purple, pink, or red.

leafeons can grow lots of sprouts all over their bodies, and will usually have more the older they get. they can also grow flowers of many kinds, which will bloom and wilt with the seasons like normal. it doesn't hurt the leafeon to pick their flowers or trim their leaves, but it is reccommended to leave their sprouts alone unless they get excessively long as they help the leafeon photosynthesize. spots of brown or light greenish colors can appear on a leafeons leaves. they can also have stripes, spots, or points. they can have any shade of brown or green eyes, as well as blue on rare occassions.

lastly, glaceons vary a lot in their fur thickness depending on the fur it inherits from its eevee form. they don't require long fur as they don't need to stay warm, so its really only a vestigal leftover trait from needing to stay warm when it was an eevee. a glaceons "bangs" can be diffurent in shape and size. the same hard, thick ice that they are made from can sometimes appear on other parts of glaceons body, clinging to its fur like makeshift armor. if the ice is broken it does not hurt the glaceon. they too can have all kinds of patterns, including stripes, spots and points. they will often have diamond shaped patterns. their eyes can only be blue or brown.

somewhat inspired by @belamew

that's all. might add more to this :pp

[noideasforausername]

crumpled letter.

description: sirius black x literally whoever (self-insert or existing character, anything works)

word count: 0.7k

warnings: angst? (basically all I write is angst are we even surprised at this point)

───────────

Sirius was used to being on the receiving end of an absurd number of letters – written confessions – on the regular. It had been admittedly entertaining at first, grown rapidly concerning and ended up becoming quite bothersome. By his sixth year, he’d taken the habit of simply throwing them away: the dizzying shades of pink an eyesore, particularly first thing in the morning.  

Blue, black, red and occasionally gold ink, all conveying one clear message through their various deviations from the boring “I like you” (that is, of course, with one singular and minuscule heart over each individual i). 

That particular morning, things were about as outwardly ordinary as possible: the nauseatingly colourful pile dropped next to Sirius’ goblet a testament to this statement.  

It seemed that the owls’ brief period of strike was over – for Hogwarts had seen this rare phenomenon earlier that year, the animals having reached abnormally high levels of annoyance with the repetitive act of carrying the garish mail to a less-than-grateful black-haired student. 

Sirius had half a mind to leave them there. Maybe that would give his faceless – and nameless in some cases – admirers a hint. But he didn’t. Instead, he crumpled them all up with a flick of his wand, a motion he knew by heart, and stuffed them in his pocket (the waiting room before they’d inevitably find their home in the depths of the nearest trash can.)

Amongst them, a white envelope. One so ordinary it should have stood out from the pile. Black ink on a standard piece of parchment.

 

“Here it goes. I have tried writing this with flourish and charm, but this is my last piece of parchment and I fear I will chicken out if I do not send this now. 

I’m aware the chances of you reading this are slim. Perhaps that’s why I decided to write you in the first place. But I have tried everything. And being a small speck in the sandstorm that causes that frown to appear on your forehead every morning seemed a fair price to pay.  

Let me start, or better yet continue, by clarifying one thing: this is not a love letter. I am not writing to beg for a chance of your eyes meeting mine in anything more than a passing coincidence. Instead, I hope that this will end up at the bottom of your pocket, and that the rage I hold will burn a hole right through that expensive black silk, setting the rest of the letters aflame and silencing the voices you crush daily with the barest swish of the wrist. 

You, Sirius Orion Black, are infuriating. Your face is irksome. Your grin is positively maddening. The curve of your cheekbones, the angle of your jawline, the glint in your eyes, the way you so effortlessly carry yourself – as if taking up space is what you were born to do. I’ve come to believe that you are taunting me indirectly.  

And I wish you would stop. Or maybe what’s even more aggravating is that I can’t picture a life in which you do. It is unfair, that we are unable to look at the sun for too long without being blinded, and yet no matter how long my eyes rest on you, my vision stays intact.  

I have made it my mission to ignore you. But not only has this proven impossible, my stubborn nature has blown this situation out of proportions, resulting in a pair of invisible, unmovable binoculars that constantly seek you out having replaced my eyes.  

I have no explanation, no enchantment ever recorded matches the effect you seem to have on me. This slow, torturous, pit in my stomach knowing that somewhere between these walls, your chest is rising and falling in rhythm with my own.  

I have many more insults to throw your way, but I am running out of paper. All that to say, though you may believe you dispose only of devoted admirers, there is someone in this very castle whose life has been thrown off its axis for no apparent reason other than your very existence. I hope that getting this off my chest and sending it your way will break this unbearable cycle. If not, this is my formal way of telling you to fuck off Sirius Black. Fuck off and put my life back the way it was.”