#or my marriage (other than the L&T getting tired of me)

[jimstares]

Athlete moaning below, feel free to use that "J" key...

I've played / done sports for a long time, as a result I've had all sorts of injuries, but yesterday was a new one. Groin Strain. Was out for a run, and suddenly bang, hurt to walk, hurt like hell when trying to run. Called it a day (thanks to the L&T @kjuw89 for driving to pick me up).

Before the duathlon season started, I had a series of goals and it's been a shit season from the start: Race 1 - I mistakenly registered for the triathlon instead of the duathlon, because I didn't swim (a duathlon is run, bike, run) I was DQ'd, no points. Race 2 - Skipped / DNS (this was a non-points race so didn't really matter and it was awesome to see Mel Brooks!) Race 3 - I am a hyper-preparer, quadruple checking everything, so I was pretty surprised when I pulled my bike off the truck and had a front flat. My morning plan did not include time to have a tube replaced, I barely made the time cut-off to finish my setup. Completely threw me off my game, finished 5th in my age group

And now I'm on IR (which admittedly I've always been a bit whiny about stretching back to my youth) less than a month before the last race of the season. Argh

[montanababe7]

Wrote this last year: A post that I am writing ✍️ from pain to refreshing clarity and wholeness through Jesus: I might be 37 in natural years; but in reality, I’ve had to be an old soul all my life.

I know there are folks out there who have grown tired. Exhausted and irritated even of hearing me speaking about me going zero contact with the woman who birthed me, go ministries international, my high school experience, cross roads college, the list is endless.

I’ve faced more traumas, heartbreaks, heartaches 💔 than most people know.

I’ve come to the conclusion that I honestly don’t even care anymore. I’m done letting those painful moments define me. Define who I am.

I’m tired of being written off by those who don’t have the slightest clue of what it’s like to be in my shoes for even one day.

Most assume. That I don’t have a care in the world. That nothing ever bothers me. I have had to learn to turn my emotions on and off. some would say this is not healthy or a good thing. For me. It’s been survival.

I’m done crying about the fact that my birth mother f’ked up my life while growing up. I’m done grieving the fact that I can’t allow that woman to have any relationship with Mike and I’s, children.

I’m trying so hard to turn my 🧠 off and just let myself feel something for once other than pain.

I’m still grieving my brother Josh Farnam’s 💀 d e a t h. I miss him. So much.

I’m done hating my mom. Or the fact that she single-handedly ruined my wedding day. She didn’t allow me to attend my little sister Kelli’s bachelorette or even attend the one my sister

Had planned for me. Not to mention, she had a p I s s po o r. Seamstress desecrate the most perfect wedding dress. The sleeves that were sewn on were not even.

Lest I remind you. My b of a mother also told me that she was betting that my husband and I, wouldn’t last for more than six months after he and I, got married.

Or the fact that my birth mother and her friend sandy were cursing mike and I‘s marriage. She one of my sil in confidence that according yo her. that I was never supposed to get married, have children, or ever have a life of my own. That I was supposed to remain by her side and be her own personal s l a v e forever.

For those of who you have a healthy mother daughter relationship with your mother. Be grateful.

It’ll be 2024 soon. Starting now. I’m ready to live my life with joy instead of pain. I can’t go back and erase what happened to me when I was younger or as a newly married bride.

What I can do though. Is move forward with my best 🦶in front of me. Not looking back at the past.

Grateful my husband has been there for me. He and I, are

Both overcomer of

So much traumas and pain.

Michael Wolf 🐺. You are a champion. I want you to know that and see that. You’ve help me to withstand and accomplish so much. We’re both healing ❤️‍🩹. Little by little. Moment by moment. Day by day.

Mikey. Baby. I want you to know that I cherish you and that I love you. The love that I

Have for

You will always be here.

We’ve seen Jesus do more

Miracles

In our lifetime far more

Than we have ever dreamed of.

The best days are ahead of us. Not behind us.

I love you. I honor you. I champion you.

I might be spitfire and 💅 at times. I can have my 🦞 out a lot. But my. Heart 💜. That heart that has been through the 💍 of

🔥 is yours alone.

You brought me out of the shell I was in. My birth mother was not right about something.

I was a 🐚 of myself while growing up.

You helped me to really live. You gave me a reason for living and you do every single day.

You are the reason Mike, our girls and I, go on each day.

You give me

Strength. You might not see it. On every moment. But. I adore you. I have

The biggest crush on you. I mean. Come on. When you wink 😉 at me. Oh baby. It takes my frickin breath away.

Yup. You are amazing.

This post was a rant that turned into a sappy love note 📝 and letter 🗒️ to you.

You are my happy place. I love you so much. Thank you for always having my back. Thank you for who you are.

I love love love love you 😘 💕 🥰 😍 Mike so very much.

Love,

Your Wife.

Jess

Jessica Wolf

[foxsoulcourt]

15 questions

(or the time I almost pasted a comment intended for Hunting, @roseforthethorns + Only_1_Truth's recent spicy 🌶🌶🌶 JB/Q/AT werewolf au instead of the questions to answer 👀😂)

Ty @bishybarnaby + @macontheweb for asking me to play! 💜

1. Are you named after anyone? Kind of. My mama's best friend's name was Laurie + she like the sound of it so she came up w/something similar. (Grateful my dad ix-nayed the Two Grandmother's Name idea because Patience Josephine is a l o t for one small human to shoulder.)

2. When was the last time you cried? Two nights ago during a rewatch of Madam Secretary s05 e16 The New Normal about climate change-related migrations. Before that got weepy while listening to a friend explain the complicated surgery + recovery protocol she's navigating.

3. Do you have kids? Yep, two 24 y.o. born 5 minutes apart. Very different in almost every way, currently living in two different states. Each are DeLiGhTfuL humans which makes being family a lot of fun. ~ Interestingly, this almost wasn't my story. I'm deeply grateful neither of my parents pushed marriage or kids onto my ideas for the future. I grew up knowing neither choice is for everyone, nor an indicator of a rich, full life, and well into my twenties I was utterly convinced neither were for me. ~ As life unfolded I did a shit-ton of therapy, decided to stick around this place + then later on met my person. We're well-matched in many great ways, so when things shifted inside both of us, our two came into the world. We intentionally raised + launched them aligned with our quirky values + interests which turned out to be a trickier design challenge than I anticipated. Worthy though! But, ummm, I'm STILL kinda tired, so if you choose to do the kid thing, please get more sleep than I did while you do it. Your future self will be grateful. Plus if you have ovaries, menopause is a w a y easier journey if you've been getting enough sleep beforehand. #adrenal fatigue is real

4. Do you use sarcasm? Occasionally I hint at it, but no. It makes me emotionally + physically squirm.

5. What is the first thing you notice about people? Hmmmm, intuitively I pick up how emotionally safe they are, both within themselves + how they're likely to interact with others. Next I notice what draws their eyes. Then I get curious about what they choose to wear + why. Sometimes it's the exact opposite sequence.

6. What is your eye color? Green

7. Scary movies or happy endings? Ha! Happy endings!!! CanNOT watch anything remotely scary.

8. Any special talents? After years + years of wondering WTAF, I realised I'm the human equivalent of a portable sanctuary. Not always (that would be aNnOyiNg for all involved!), but often there's something about how I listen + interact w/people that makes them feel safe enough to share something about themselves, an insight, or chitchat about A Real Thing. It happens literally a n y w h e r e. Yesterday it was w/a guy in the grocery store check out line.

9. Where were you born? Within a mile of a small beach in a formerly sleepy southern Californian town, USA; moved to the PNW when I was 12. West coast gal all the way.

10. What are your hobbies? Chopping vegetables while listening to old school jazz, reading, dinking around in the garden, going for walks to look at other people's gardens, evolving as a human being, making Mr FSC laugh so his eyes crinkle. Vague itch to pick up some sort of fabric art activities in 2023.

11. Do you have any pets? After the heart-break of nursing first one + then a second older man cat to the other side (see below), I've become an avid backyard bird watcher. This includes staring out the window at LoTs of little brown birds + talking to the neighbourhood crows.

12. What sports do you play/have you played? All my life I've been physically active, almost always outside the bounds of defined sports. In high school I swam + played on the badminton team and both were a total gas, but that was because we were a team of weirdos doing something fun together. Swimming, bike riding, hiking, sailing, skiing, dancing, walking - all of it - is for the joy of feeling my body in motion. I am so f*%ing grateful to my parents for leading by example in this way which, thankfully, I seem to have passed onto both of our kids.

13. How tall are you? 5′6" / 167 cm

14. Favorite subject in school? All of them. Seriously. I loved learning about the natural world which opened up into all.of.the.sciences. Loved learning mathematics even when it was moderately hard; stopped when it got really hard. Adored reading + writing, and then writing about what I read. Liked art + cooking + sewing (which was still taught at the time). Took Spanish + then went to Latin America to speak it. Enjoyed learning how to speak persuasively, up in front of other people. Reading this over I started laughing because it makes sense of my Uni experience! Spent a few years on a journey through most of these topics before I narrowed it down to History of Science. Which still covers almost all of them PLUS included the study of people + institutions! Grad school was focused on leadership development + how to navigate organisational change, which meant picking up organisational psychology to add into the mix.

15. Dream job? Having had s e v e r a l already + being in the 3rd act of life w/the need to make a bit more money, this is a f a s c i n a t i n g, topical + tender question. I've loved what I've done: waited tables; collaboratively created a customer service + accounting dept within a successful dot com start up within a major retailer; lay minister with teens in a queer positive church; parent; organisational change consultant. B u T, I've also experienced mental + physical exhaustion 3x. The last episode has been particularly challenging to recover from, so the question at hand is how to be moderate. I hear it's possible + have seen others achieve this goal. Recently started back up w/therapy to figure why it's been challenging for me thus far. Dream of dreams? Consultant designing + facilitating important conversations w/in organisations navigating changes in leadership styles between The Old Way + what's evolving. I'm pretty skilled at inter-generational dynamics which is a deal these days. Goal is to get paid handsomely enough for doing it part time. Stretch goal? Flesh out some scribbled notes pinned on the bulletin board >> write a couple of small square books about organisational change + Generation Flux + sTuFf.

Who else wants to play? If you're interested, @fuzzballsheltiepants, @pomponiaia, @christinefromsherwood, @anyawen, @merceyca, @leahlisabeth, @youreyestheyglow. I'm guessing any one of you will do this in 50% fewer words. 😉 Carrying forward bishy's caveat: this one is long and also personal, so feel free to nope out if you'd rather not!

Here are sweet Oscar + Mr Bingley, may they continue to rest in peace while nourishing the garden.

[rumblelibrary]

Have you ever thought about writing a continuation to Unofficial Meeting? I'm dying to know whether Laszlo earns the reader's forgiveness and if she accepts his proposal or not. Have a good day! 😚

Undisclosed Meeting [Dr Laszlo Kreizler x Fem!Reader]

Word count: 2k

Warnings: Laszlo self deprecating himself hard

A/N: how could I give up a chance to make my boy Laszlo happy? Thank you so much for requesting it, it really made me happy to have an old story requested. Here is the original story

“Are you even listening to me?”

Violet inquired as you blinked surprised and taken aback. She invited you over for an afternoon tea, but your mind kept wondering off to what happened between you and Laszlo. You haven’t seen him in over a month and to be honest you missed him. The first few days you were firm on your choice, he upset you and your family, he crossed your boundaries mindlessly.

But then you realised how he meant to ask your hand to your father, how he never meant for you to be hurting, he just wanted to make it official.

Your grandmother tried to talk you out of your anger but she didn’t managed to, it was over anyway. You upset each other, you closed that chapter.

If you have feelings for him that chapter is not closed, your grandmother told you but you tried to ignore it. You haven’t seen him in so long, not even at some event or where you’d usually expect him to be. He kept sending you flowers to you until the end of the previous month. That silly man, always hating to leave things halfway done.

“I am, I am just a bit tired” you said as she waved her hand 

“nonsense ” she said offering you to try some sweets while she stood up to call her maid and gather what she meant to show you “I’ll show you now the latest Paris fashion and you’ll have to wake up” 

She was your friend, she was sweet and she knew you were on a rough patch now and she did all in her power t keep you distracted.

“Charles stop it”

John’s voice rang through you ears as you stood up to see what was going on from the window facing the luscious back garden of the Moore residence. Little Charles was the spit image of his parents and an adventurer at heart, you could tell from the way he kept his father busy running after him.

You smiled as John gave up opening his arms in defeat.

“What I have to do?” He groaned making you chuckle as for a moment it looked like he was asking to God, but when you noticed that he was in fact talking to Dr Kreizler who was sitting on a bench. You codlin’t help but rest your eyes on him, he looked pale, tired like he wasn’t sleeping. He was like this during investigations but as far as you knew there was no one at the moment.

“Wat you have to do John? Let the boy be” he said as a tired smile crept onto his lips.

“Yes, he will break his skull in a second”

Laszlo shook his head looking at him “If you prevent him from doing anything he won’t never learn” he said as he spoke matter of factly but that tiredness in his voice was evident. You wondered what kept him up.

You wondered if t was your fault.

But then you saw the sweet look he had for the child as he picked a ball that was hiding behind his back to give it to him to play with.

He was so good with kids, it was incredible.

You knew it was his job, but the tenderness he showed with them was something you felt on your own skin as you used to be allowed to be part of that special round of people that got to see him being sweet.

You moved away from the window just in time for Violet to come back, her maids holding onto over twenty new items of clothing.

“V” you said to her as the use of that little nickname sparked already her attention “I have to ask you a favour”

It was dead in the evening when Laszlo got asked from Violet to meet a friend of hers with a child with various problems.

The symptoms she described didn’t really add up, they should be excluding each other. But no matter what he decided to go there. 

He usually was very firm about his privacy and the times he could meet or not patients, even though the secrecy of the hour would be typical of a wealthy family trying to hide some kind of a problem they judge as shameful, he also came to a point where work was all he got.

He missed you, everything reminded him of you. He hoped to see, he would be a liar if he didn’t admit to have handed a dollar or two to your maid to at least know how are you.

He didn’t mean to stalk you, he just wanted you happy and once more he was acting behind your back. But your maid told him you were fine and doing your business, so he stopped inquiring. He didn’t deserve you in the first place anyway, but how things ended really pained him, he really thought to be doing right and he really wanted to have a future with you, to have many what John has.

But what nonsense thinking about it now that it is all gone and by his own hand, he had nobody to blame but himself.

As he arrived to the building he got inside surprised not to find anyone at service but only an open door.

The instinct would have told him to go away, but he was reckless by now, he already lost what he cared the most.

Walking inside the candlelit hallway he was surprised to get to a large living room only to find you there.

The truth was that he stopped on his track to admire you. You were amazing, he adored you in any possible shape and form, everything from your clothing to your composure screamed for his eyes to be fixated onto you.

He took that moment to look at you, take in your image, last time you two spoke you were so upset and he didn’t want that to be the last image he had of you.

“I am more discreet than you when I have to do things in secret” you said and he smiled lightly

“You’re”

His admission, the tiredness of his look just paining you.

“Is this a house of your family?”

“Yes, it is my aunt’s but she is on some cruise with her husband”

He nodded quietly as he looked around moving closer to you, the candles around you making him feel like the moment was set in another time.

“You didn’t have to make an appointment to meet me”

“Well, I asked a friend for a favour, I could have paid Stevie to drive you here anyway” you answered, basically hinting him that your maid didn’t keep his little inquiring a secret between the two of you.

He nodded gulping down, he felt like he was naked in front of you, defenceless and anything you could attack him with would really hurt. 

“I though that after our last conversation we needed to speak alone and in a neutral ground, I attacked you and I know I moved past my means”

“Just like I did inquiring about your life without permission” he concluded for you, he kept thinking about that day over and over, he couldn’t take it out of his mind and he even thought it would be easy only because so many people hated him already, button you. He wished you’d never be one of them.

“Miss Y/L/N” the fact he used your last name showing how he was trying to prove you some respect, not using your first name like you’re somehow close, mostly because he doubts you’d wish him close at any time.

“All I have ever wanted was to be worth of you”

His words trembling, like snakes sliding onto your skin.

He opened his mouth to say something and he closed it as he stared somewhere away from you, he shook his head slowly. The pain visible through him.

“I am a despicable failure as a human being, I know it” he said as he rose his hand to invite your silence “I have spent my life trying to find a common language  to get through people, studying them ,making sure to be able to read human behaviour to allow myself the freedom of interaction. I am not a natural like John, I can’t just go on a group and charm my way through it and I knew, I knew from the moment you allowed me to be close to you that I would ruin it because I am such social wreck, because I can’t control myself or I can’t not follow the rules that I have been told are the right path to follow”

He let out a shaky breath as he looked down and then up at you, he was trying to hold back tears but the truth was that he cried for losing you, He cried for nights and days.

“I apologise once more, I wanted to do you right and I just overstepped you. I always admired you for your being independent and clever and I reduced you to an object with my insensitive behaviour. I always make myself strong from talking my way through people and I blindsided you when words were the most needed”

You looked at him as maybe for the first time he really throw away the mask, he really let himself speak up.

“I valued what you did for me” you blinked at him surprised, your head slightly falling on side to observe him.

He was going down the self deprecating himself hill, you could almost count how much time there was between him going down onto his arm topic. You know that was always his undisclosed weakness, how he hated it and saw himself as unlovable because imperfect.

“It is yes”

He looked at you with a frown not seeing what you mean.

“My answer for your question”

He frowned even more, what question? You could hear it resonate into his mind as he didn’t ask you anything, he came to you to apologise and…

And then he got it.

His eyes widened as he opened his mouth only to close it again.

No, he was probably misunderstanding, once more reading badly the situation.

You picked your left glove slowly taking it off to show him you were wearing his ring on your hand.

He stared at you, his hand hesitantly moving to pick yours bringing it up to his lips and resting a kiss over it, his hand holding yours as he stared up at you.

His wet eyes now unmistakable from cha closeness, the signs of his lack of sleep visible.

“In a marriage there shouldn’t be secrets, I tried to avoid something shameful for me when you allowed me to see every part of you” you admitted as you weren’t free from blame, you referred to pretend something wasn’t there rather than facing it.

He stared at you with shaky breath, as he licked his lips trying to find words.

“I love you Laszlo, I really want to be your wife”

His jaw trembled as the happiness rushed over him like electricity, his hand bringing yours over his heart beating so fast and hard that he felt it could explode.

“I love you Y/N” he whispered as you caressed his cheek with your right hand as he leaned down, still not daring to believe what was happening.

So you just did it, you leaned in closing the space between the two of you with a kiss.

The times were changed.

Women could accept wedding proposals without their father’s approval, men could cry for love and love words were made of truths and exposed weaknesses and not by the words of dusty poets. And with such strong ideals you could only imagine your life as set up for a greater kind of happiness with him.

Tagged @cazzyimagines @lieutenantn @handmaiden-of-mischief @thesunflowersutra @zemomybeloved @fictionlandslanddreams@charistory @greeneyedblondie44 @apparrio @hb8301 @whatawildone @rhymerhymerhyme  @thehuiabird @lilith-blackrose @unbeatablecurlgirl @obsidianlaszlo @alindeluce @zemosimp05 @baronesszemo-blackwood @nocapesdahling @everythingbeginsineternity-blog

[piedpiperslists]

JJK: Roommates AU

List of all Jungkook fics under 'Roommates' AU:

* s - contains smut

* Last updated: 17/09/2023

D R A B B L E S

[drabble] by joon-ahh Summary: “I fucking love you.” “Hang up, and tell me this when you’re sober.”

[drabble] by noteguk s camgirl!reader, PWP

[drabble] by ubemango s Summary: Where u catch roomie!JK watching Overwatch porn.

Ghostly Intervention by army-author Summary: The ghost that haunts our apartment is tired of watching our failed flirting attempts and has started leaving not-so-subtle hints for us to ‘just get together already!’

Give Me Back My Charger by hollyxqx Summary: Jungkook is a little shit.

Haste by yoonia college au Summary: “I wish I could hate you.”

“If you think I don’t feel anything for you, then you’re more stupid than I thought.” by gukyi friends to lovers

In the Frosty Air by gukyi college au Summary: Two weeks ago you and your roommate slept together. Which would be fine, if you knew you both felt the same about each other. But you don’t. And now it’s Christmas, and Jungkook is still gorgeous and gentle and wonderful and here, and and you don’t really know what to do about that.

Love Me Like You Do by joonsmoonluna friends to lovers Summary: Jungkook’s always been a little tongue tied around you, but it’s okay, ‘cause so do you.

More Than Friends by delightfulserendipity friends to lovers Summary: Your bestfriend is completely oblivious to your love for him, and you couldn’t be anymore obvious.

Ours by koostarcandy Summary: “Go on! Then leave!” + “How mad would you be if I kissed you?”

Red Carnations by persphonesorchid Summary: Jungkook makes you watch a horror that scared you.

Shirts and Staircases [pt2] by thejooncrew s college au Summary: Your shirt-stealing escapades come to an auspicious end when your best friend catches you in the act.

The Prettiest Sound by minisugakoobies s Summary: Jungkook's just heard the prettiest sound in the world.

Your Light [pt2] by hongcherry enemies to lovers Summary: Being stuck in the dark with your annoying roommate was not ideal, however, maybe it wasn’t so bad in the end.

O N E S H O T S

Anpanman by honeymoonjin s wc~6.6k / friends to lovers, fake dating Summary: Your best friend Jungkook finally convinces you to seek therapy for your failing mental health. The only catch? The one therapist that’s within your price range is an alternative marriage counsellor, Jung Hoseok, and the only way Jungkook managed to get you an appointment was by saying the two of you were married. Will couples counselling actually be useful for your wellbeing, or will something that runs much deeper rise to the surface instead?

As I Told You by eleventoes wc~9.7k / enemies to lovers Summary: Jeon Jungkook: junior, rising star quarterback, no.1 on the list of People You Cannot Stand. Also, your new roommate.

Bunnicula by baojinnie wc~5.2k / vampire!reader Summary: “Do I scare you?”

Caught Me by jeongi s wc~13.5k / enemies to lovers Summary: You hate your temporary roommate, Jungkook and it doesn’t help that he’s been catching you at the most inconvenient of times.

Cockblocked by mercurygguk s wc~15.8k / friends to lovers Summary: In which a pair of best friends are hopelessly in love with one another but they’re both too dumb to realize, even when everyone around them are dropping hints every five minutes. Or alternatively; “You’re an idiot for thinking I wouldn’t love you back.”

Cozy Thief by bratkook s wc~5.1k Summary: A rainstorm knocking out your power is the small push needed for confessions to come tumbling out.

Days to Morning Glory by sketchguk s wc~20.6k / aspiring rockstar!Jungkook, med student!reader, exes to lovers Summary: While you had lugged the baggage of your heartbreak and built a life for yourself in the city that never sleeps, Jeongguk had traveled the universe twice, living out of his suitcase before finally settling into the city of angels. But after five years, you both end up returning to your hometown, sharing a house that’s tainted with the memories of your past.

Don't Go by jkstompers wc~3.3k Summary: You and Jungkook were simply roommates, nothing more than that. No matter how much you wanted to get to know him, Jungkook always left before you were able to get any deeper than two weeks into his past.

Extra Cheese, Please! by vankoya wc~9.5k / friends to lovers Summary: Jeongguk dislikes three things: 1. Having his Overwatch marathon nights interrupted, 2. Dealing with drunk people while he is sober, and 3. Cheesy ramyeon. His best friend slash housemate slash insufferable crush is the drunk girl with an incessant craving for super cheesy ramyeon who interrupts his Overwatch marathon night, and ultimately proves that the aforementioned meal looks just as gross coming up than it does when it is first in the bowl. Luckily, there is always a silver lining. Even in the worst of situations.

Happy Birthday Loser by jungk0oksthighs s wc~8k / PWP Summary: After three years of simping over your roommate, you give him one hell of a birthday celebration.

He Loves You, He Loves You Not by yoonpobs s wc~2.7k / angst, roommate!Jungkook, FWB!Seokjin

Heartbreak Trials by dreamyjoons s wc~13.8k Summary: It all started with a bet: the one with the highest body count would get the most illustrious prize - Namjoon’s bedroom. For you and Jungkook, the race was on.

“I can tell you’re stressed, let me fix that.” by solarwonux s wc~3.2k / PWP

“I gotta make sure you get home safe.” by taetaespeaches wc~3k

(I Think) I'd Have a Heart Attack by euphorajeon wc~4.9k / college au Summary: Having feelings for your roommate is never not complicated, all awkward glances and (not-so) subtle avoidance. After weeks, you think you’ve buried them deep enough for your roommate not to notice. But Jeongguk digs deeper.

It Takes Two by junghelioseok s wc~29.8k / fake dating Summary: You don’t need retrospect to tell you that dating a coworker was a bad idea. Two months after your breakup, he seems to have moved on to someone new—and quite happily, if his social media is to be believed. Meanwhile, the only new thing in your life is your roommate, Jungkook, who seems nice enough. Just nice enough to coax into coming to your company’s annual holiday party, and more than handsome enough to show off a little bit. Or, as it turns out, a lot.

Lather, Rinse, Repeat by btsrunmylife s wc~3.5k Summary: Jeon “I’m too lazy to wash myself” Jungkook.

Laundry Day by jinjikook s wc~5k Summary: Jeongguk always pioneered one household chore: laundry. Now why he had such an affinity for it, you had no idea. That is, until you come home and he lost track of time, causing you to stumble upon him in the midst of something strange and yet altogether intriguing.

Let's Play: Dirty by jungkxook s wc~10k / enemies to lovers Summary: On today’s stream, watch as the king of gaming Jeon Jungkook gets totally pwned by some newbie player on Overwatch (he swears he was stream sniped)! To make matters worse, he can’t seem to focus anymore when you’re in the room but he promises that’s not because he’s in love with you or anything. Use code ‘jungkook’ on any game purchase through steam at checkout for 25% off so that Jungkook has something to feel better about!

Lucky, Lucky Girl by kth1fics s wc~6.1k / PWP Summary: The joy of Jungkook having a grand ol’ time with his own personal karaoke night causes you, his roommate, to grow more and more annoyed.

Magic-8 by whatifyoulivelikethat s wc~14.7k Summary: Jeon Jungkook wants to have sex. No one is surprised. But he has... reasons. Are they good reasons? Debatable. However, there's something in his way. A Magic-8 ball that seems to relish in cock-blocking him. Nah, it says. Hmph, well, guess what, ball? Like a criminal undercover, Jeon Jungkook is going to steal you and then there's no one and nothing to stop him from getting what he needs.

May 31 by jeonjeonggukenergy s wc~5k / college au Summary: On the last day of your senior year living together, you’re still fighting your feelings for your roommate Jungkook. Before you can fully move out and move on, he makes a pretty significant scheduling error. #and there was only one bed

Microwave (Mis)adventures by bymoonchild s wc~20k / enemies to lovers Summary: Out of all things to be afraid of, Jungkook, the seat-stealer of your 8am class and annoying housemate whom you despise with every fiber of your being, chooses to have a phobia of microwaves, but he loves buying microwaveable food – because come on, they’re irresistible – and you somehow find yourself getting dragged into his microwaves (mis)adventures. Cue chaos, sarcasm-laced banter and an unplanned romance.

* Obviously by ugh-yoongi wc~3.7k / secret relationship

Oh My God, They Were (Quarantined) Roommates by ot7always s wc~22.8k Summary: What do you do when you’re quarantined for months on end with Jeon Jungkook - S tier cuddler, workout robot, and thirst trap extraordinaire? Fuck him, you guess.

* Once the Thrill Expires by alphabetboyluvr s wc~5.8k / angst, FWB, college au Summary: Your housemate turned FWB takes another girl home after a night out.

Other Half by whatifyoulivelikethat s wc~6.5k / FWB Summary: A PS4 nearly kills you. Your ex-boyfriend’s best friend comes to live with you for a while. Your black towels become fodder for box-bleach gone wrong. You hand ends up on Jeon Jungkook’s morning wood. Your lunch is interrupted quite rudely. “Can I have the other half of the egg?” Now you’re thinking, none of this makes sense, what kind of stupid summary is this?

Perhaps Love by mangowillow wc~12.5k / friends to lovers Summary: For as long as you can remember, you have been in love with your childhood friend turned roommate, but Jeon Jungkook remains oblivious even when he comes to comfort and help you sleep every night.

Piquant by kth1 s wc~12k / vampire au Summary: Jungkook is your awesome roommate who also happens to be a vampire. There’s nothing wrong with that of course, even with the playful tactics he does to fluster you. Until you realize those quipping taunts meant more than he led on.

Proposals by pjxmin s wc~18.1k / friends to lovers, fake engagement au Summary: You and Jeongguk propose at restaurants to get free food, but somewhere along the way you start to fall for him.

Scenes of Misguided Magic by wwilloww s wc~2.3k / ft KTH, magic au Summary: Living with your two magic roommates means often exploding potions, spell mistakes, and strange ingredients. It doesn't mean sex magic. Except today it does.

Somnolent by forgottenpasta wc~3.5k Summary: After spending one night in bed with you, Jeongguk finds out he is unable to sleep unless you’re sleeping with him.

Sparkle by btsmosphere wc~2.5k Summary: Jungkook may have been planning a little something… a powercut is only a small barrier.

The Philosophy of Good Luck by kidguk s wc~7k / tattoo artist!Jungkook Summary: “You told me I looked good and that you needed to get a tattoo of my face” is not the explanation you wanted to hear from the tattoo artist that permanently etched the dumbest drunken request of your life onto your skin.

T W O S H O T S / S E R I E S

Blackout by jjungxkook s friends to lovers, college au Summary: Utility bills shooting up like this should be an international crime. Luckily, Jungkook has the perfect idea(s) to save up money and make your night sinfully unforgettable.

How to Get a Guy ² by taeshobipop s fuckboy!Jungkook, college au Summary: Star basketball player Jeon Jungkook has a reputation as the ultimate fuckboi. He’s loved by everyone. Everyone. And you would have followed suit if he had not broken all your strict Roommate Rules™ within the first week of his stay. Jungkook, on the other hand, thinks you’re absolutely bizarre. But there’s a silver lining — Mr. Fuckboi here knows basketball captain Min Yoongi, your dreadfully clueless crush. He strikes up a deal with you: he’ll teach you the ways of flirting if you lessen your load of rules (so Jungkook can continue perusing his way through the ladies on campus). Yet the longer Jungkook spends with you, the more he realizes that maybe he doesn’t want to be the campus fuckboi anymore. The problem is, how does he prove that to you?

Roommates by tayegi s best friend's brother

The Unbearable Lightness of Being... Something More by ggukcangetit s Summary: When your best friend, Namjoon, asks if a junior from his business ventures class can live with you till his lease comes through, you don’t think much about it. But one month with Jeon Jungkook proves to be extremely difficult because of how little the boy says but how much he seems to topple over without much effort.

[deluluass]

What bliss, domesticity.

for: @tink2kagome. i’m sorry it took me so long to work on ur pretty setter squad request T^T i’ll probably do like another one in the future! 

  & @lady-tokugawa-of-mikawa @belpomme @chaichai-the-weeb for being such lovely mutuals <3 <3 

Content warnings: rape/noncon; nsfw; yakuza/organized crime; gun mention; a lot of (non-sexual) food references in this one

  Jun’ichi Saikawa was obviously the kind of man who liked to laugh. Not unlike most people in their world. The kind who use their entire body when they do, announcing to the entire world with a bellowing “Ha Ha Ha!” how pleased they are with whatever’s going on in front of them.

  Which, in all honesty, was pretty admirable, that the old man could still do it considering how bored to tears Wataru was. 

  That it’s a humid afternoon didn’t help either. He could feel the sweat on his back even when the doors were already slid open, exhibiting a verdant garden filled with blossoms and shrub peonies. From his place he could see the school of koi swirling in the shallow pond, their scales iridescent under the warm rays of the sun. 

  “Didn’t know you were the funny sort, 'Kaashi!” Saikawa blurted out, the sake in his hand spilling to his fingers.

  This wasn’t Wataru’s first day on the job, but this is the first that he gets to do something this important. And with someone he highly respects, too. 

  So he gave his collar a light tug, steeling himself to endure as he tucked his legs further beneath him, and resorted to thinking about the many things he would absolutely surrender just to lie down on the warm mat. 

  His car, maybe.

  The brand new noise-cancelling headphones he bought, if pushed. 

  Wataru saw Akaashi nod.

  “I appreciate a joke every now and then,” he said.

  The larger man laughed again.

  “Here, here!” Saikawa thundered, snatching a tiny, yellow box from the maid who appeared as swiftly as she’d left. 

  “I heard you like sweets. Here,” he said, grinning as he handed it to Akaashi. “My youngest son just opened a cake shop. I know what you’re thinking, but who am I to say no, eh?”

  Akaashi passed the box to Wataru. 

  “Mind it for me, please,” he whispered.

  How unexpected. Akaashi-san has a sweet tooth.

  Huh. 

  That’s pretty neat. Wataru himself wasn’t partial to cakes, but he does love pudding. 

  “You are a good father, Jun’ichi-san,” Akaashi told him. 

  This time, Wataru didn’t bother suppressing a yawn as Saikawa fumbled for his phone, hiding it behind his hand as he stared at the birds chirping and hopping about outside.

  “Wanna see him? He’s much like you! Good head on his shoulders, that one.” 

  “I am honored, Jun’ichi-san,” Akaashi echoed back, peering down at the photos Saikawa showed him. 

  “He sends me a lot of these- uh,” Saikawa snorted, his nose reddened by the alcohol. “What do young people call it, the- pictures-”

  “Selfies?” Akaashi politely supplied. 

  “That’s the one! Look. Precious, ain’t he?”

  His earpiece crackled to life. 

  Konoha’s voice emerged from the static. 

  “We’re ready when you are,” his senior murmured. “Man, this is taking too long. Let’s get some burgers when we’re done.”

  “Akaashi-san,” Wataru croaked, feeling his cheeks heat up as he continued, “K-Komi-san and the others are waiting for you.”

  Saikawa perked up. “Ah, of course! Of course!” 

  He stumbled when he attempted to stand up. Akaashi was quick on his feet to assist him.

  “I knew I could count on you, son,” he muttered, patting Akaashi’s back. “Now, you tell Bokuto that what happened between us- it’s all in the past! All in the past! And if those bastards mess with him again, you tell him to run to old Jun’ichi!”

  Akaashi clasped Saikawa’s hand.

  “Thank you,” Akaashi said. “I’ll be sure to relay your sentiments to Bokuto-san.”

  “You do that, my boy.” Saikawa’s belly shook as he laughed. “Your generation’s a smart one, indeed. The in-fighting and wars, bah! All that trouble for nothing; that’s not your style. Your lot’s the future now!”

  Then, Akaashi stepped a few meters back and bowed. 

  Wataru followed behind him. 

  “We will be taking our leave,” Akaashi said. “It has been an illuminating talk, Jun’ichi-san.”

  The sound of the bamboo drip trickling water into another stalk permeated through the silence.

  It collapsed and clunked against a stone. 

  He heard the birds flutter away.

  When Wataru raised his head, Saikawa had already been lying face down on the floor. 

  And, of course, Wataru’s used to it: the crack of a gun muffled by a silencer. 

  He’s been practicing his entire life, after all. He actually doesn’t flinch anymore and Wataru thinks he should be proud of himself.

  It’s just that... how could someone who used to be there, suddenly...disappear? Saikawa was right in front of him a few minutes ago. Laughing and showing off photographs of his son. And now he’s...not.

  But, Saikawa didn’t disappear. Not really. 

  The blood seeping through the tatami is proof of it, but Wataru chooses not to look. In theory, he knows what a bullet through the skull looks like. He’d just rather not see today if what he’s taught reflects true in the real world. 

  Maybe some other time.

  “Wataru.” 

  Wataru flinched. “Y-yes?”

  Akaashi looked back at him. “The cake?”

  His body was still trembling and it took a lot of strength to not let it show in his hands when he gave it back to Akaashi, the box pleasantly yellow with doodles of doe-eyed eggs dancing along the handle. Unblemished, unlike Akaashi, who was sporting a splatter of blood along his cheek. 

  It’s surprisingly still cool to touch, too.

  “No, thank you,” he said, rejecting the handkerchief that Wataru offered. 

  From afar, Wataru could hear the faint melodies of an old love song being played by a car radio. No doubt Konoha’s doing. It followed them, growing louder the closer they walked back into the parking lot. The others bowed and sent gruff salutations along Akaashi’s way as they dragged bodies out of the Saikawa mansion. 

  (It was nauseating and Wataru wanted to pass out.)

  He pressed his nails harshly into the meat of his palm. 

  “A-Akaashi-san,” Wataru began. “I didn’t know that- that um, you liked... sweets.”

  Akaashi halted. 

  “No, I don’t,” he said, blinking. “But my wife does.”

  Wataru stared at him. 

  Akaashi went ahead. 

  He stayed that way— staring and wondering, until they stopped by the fast food restaurant that Konoha loved so much. Wataru couldn’t even finish his burger and fries. 

  By the time that they hit the freeway, Akaashi had already cleaned himself up and Wataru was still grappling with the word “wife.” 

  Of course he knows the man is married. 

  But, how, exactly, do you reconcile his reputation with the sight of him, every passing headlight sharpening his features, quietly humming along to Aki Yashiro? Who was longing for Shinjuku at night, the beauty of it, and oh, how wonderful it’d be, she said: a rendezvous with her lover, waiting for her under raining cherry blossoms. 

  Wataru figured that he was tired and starting to see things. 

  That small smile that graced Akaashi’s lips couldn't be real, either, especially those hands of his that held the box of cake like it’s worth more than gold.

He wasn't really particular when it comes to music. A song's a song, in Akaashi's opinion. Another form of noise that helps when the silence gets too overbearing. 

  But you, on the other hand, liked music. Listened to it the same way one eats their favorite food: memorizes the lyrics; goes out of your way to collect unearthed photographs and newspaper clippings that made the singer seem more human.

  You loved music— was probably the right way of putting it.

  Especially the old variety. He didn't get it at first. The sounds are dated; no one speaks in that language with that cadence anymore; the singer's probably dead.

  Well, Akaashi still doesn't get it, if he were to be honest. 

  Yet here he is. 

  His hands were wrapped around your waist, coaxing you into a slow— albeit clumsy, waltz.

  "Kei-kun!" you squeaked. "The dishes!"

  You dragged your slippers beneath you, struggling to wipe the suds off your hands. 

  "S-seriously, Kei-kun..!"

  Sure, he doesn’t fully understand what’s great about it, music. 

  Yet here he is. 

  Perhaps it’s because he immediately recognized the first few notes this time, that’s why he’s doing this. He didn’t even wait for the DJ to finish saying, “You’re still listening to Vintage F.M. Here’s a classic for you couples out there. Have a romantic night with Nat King Cole’s L-O-V-”

  Perhaps it’s because your cream stew tasted extra special that it made him shrug the fatigue off, giving in to the urge of pulling you close and taking your damp hand in his to sway and bob along the skipping bassline. Your bashful objections went in one ear and out the other.

  Sure, he’s not the type to do this, either, dancing. 

  Yet here he is. 

  Perhaps it’s because he knew that it’s your favorite song.

  Perhaps it’s just what marriage does to you.

  "Did you like the cake?" he whispered against your neck, inhaling the scent of cinnamon and the way your skin jumped as he did.

  Your breaths were shallow against his chest, but you managed a soft, “Yes, sweetheart. Thank you.”

  Akaashi caressed your back, kneading the tensed muscles as he huffed. 

  “Good,” he murmured, trembling. “Good girl. What a relief." 

  It was endearing, how offbeat the both of you were. A shame, though, considering that Nat King Cole’s fervently insisting on love; that it’s all that I can give to you; that it’s more than just a game for two. 

  So Akaashi makes up for his two left feet by joining in. He pressed his lips to your forehead. How strange, your presence in his life. What did he do to deserve you by his side, for this contentment that thaws away the chill?

  (He put a ring on your finger, is what he did. He deserves this.)

  “Two,” he droned, made giddy by the sparks in his belly, “in love can make it.”

  You looked at him, wide-eyed. 

  “Take my heart and please don’t break it.”

  He spun you around.

  “Oh my god, Kei-kun,” you gasped. “You can’t sing.”

  Akaashi’s aware of it all too well. He can’t carry a note; not him: the guy who’s had monotony ingrained in his very being. But that’s why he has you.

  A startled giggle left you as he guided you into a box step, the trumpet rising and falling over the strings. You stepped on him a few times, so he lifted you up, just so, and kicked off your slippers. Then, he set your feet atop his own. 

  He took you with him as he moved, waddling and careful not to hit his back against the countertop. It came as no revelation that both of you weren’t any better dancers even after this maneuver.

  Akaashi continued. Starting with L—

  “Is for the way you look at me.”

  “Stop, stop-” Your eyes crinkled at the sides. “You’re flat.”

  Akaashi persisted, anyway, taking your cheek to pepper kisses all over your face.

  “O is for the only one I see.”

  Your laugh was airy— light and buoyant all over the kitchen, like a fairy leaving stardust in its wake. Not gratingly booming nor demanding. After all, you weren’t the kind who felt the need for it: an audience to witness how pleased you are; how strong and powerful you are over everyone else. 

  Besides, your laugh was just for him. A private and intimate thing. And he was so lost in it that he almost forgot what’s been gnawing at him for the entire morning.

  Akaashi rested his chin on your shoulder, nuzzling the downy fabric of your dress as he gripped you by the hips. 

  “Where did you go earlier?” 

  The orchestra was in a joyous uproar, joining the rapid beating of your heart; the trumpet bright and clear, singing in harmony with the bass and saxophones and trombones, as Nat King Cole repeatedly guaranteed, as if an oath, that love was made for me and you. 

  Love was made for me and you.

  “I had to buy some groceries!” you piped up. “We ran out of ingredients. Sorry, I forgot to bring my phone with me. Oh, I have to run you a bath. I’ll tell you when it’s done, alright?”

  You broke away from him with a beaming grin, but Akaashi wanted to ask, despite the evidence of it before him. 

  “Are you happy?”

  It has already ended, the song. The DJ was signing off for the night.

  You nodded, playfully jabbing his arm with a fist. 

  “Of course,” you told him. “Why wouldn’t I be?”

  Perhaps it’s because you were never really good at pretense, no matter how much you hid behind needless noise. 

  Music. Laughter. Running water. 

  Akaashi sighed as he slumped down the nearest stool.

  Of course you’re happy. Why wouldn’t you be?

  After rubbing his eyes with clammy fingers, Akaashi fiddled them together beneath his temples. He released a heavy breath and fished for his phone in his pocket.

  He spoke after the first two rings. 

  “Wataru-san, I’m sorry for bothering you,” he said. “Can you do something for me?”

  His subordinate didn't ask him why, neither did he react when he'd stated his request. Akaashi knew, however, that the question was sitting in Wataru's clipped replies. The boy’s “yes, sir” and “understood, sir” were far too enthusiastic than normal.

  Akaashi didn’t mind, though, if he did ask. And despite that familiar pang of dread, Akaashi would answer him like the common— just like the average, everyday husband— with that characteristic, bordering on irksome pride that they have when they talk about their wives. 

  Why?

  “Well, Wataru-san,” Akaashi would answer. “Perhaps this is just what marriage does to you.”

The house was a house like any other.

  There was an old pickup truck parked outside the freshly painted gate, carrying crates of fruits and vegetables in its trunk. Along the bricked walls was an overgrowth of vines and ferns. It extended around the windows and crept up the balcony.

  A large Shiba ran outside and jumped to your lap as soon as it saw you by the driveway.

  Wataru heard Chiaki stir at the back of the car.

  “Pay up, asshole,” he grunted, waking a disheveled Ryota who’s still holding a half-bitten melon bread.

  His lackey cracked his neck and gave the scenery a cursory glance. “Could be a front.”

  Ryota grumbled and went back to sleep.

  “Idiot,” Chiaki clicked his tongue. “She traveled all the way to Miyagi just to give intel? And here? Of all places?”

  Three days. 

  They’ve tailed you for three days. Akaashi-san never said anything else, besides that within the week, while he’s gone and sealing deals in another country, there was a high likelihood of you folding and getting out of Tokyo. 

  To run right here. In Miyagi.

  He didn’t say why, really, but Wataru supposes it’s better that he didn’t. Because during the days of absolute, mind-crushing boredom, of watching some suburban wife go out for a morning walk, chat with her neighbors, and shop around the market, rinse and repeat, coming up with the Why had been their only salvation.

  The betting pool has two answers: cheater or snitch.

  Chiaki was insistent on the former, while Ryota stood by the latter. 

  And Wataru...Wataru could only watch, waiting with a bated breath as the door finally opened.

  “I bet it’s someone younger,” Chiaki said. “Usually is.”

  Seems that none of them were winning anything today.

  The man who emerged from the house was far older— who, oddly enough, resembled you. An  old woman soon followed behind him. Both of them looked at you as if they were witnessing a specter, or someone who's crawled back from the dead. An appropriate comparison, especially since they’re both wearing somber black clothes.

  It wasn’t his place to assume. Though he’s been promoted to a slightly higher position, it will never come close to the place that Keiji Akaashi occupies. Wataru knows all of these, but nothing was stopping him from putting the pieces together, no matter what little he has.

  They could only stare when all of you broke down into tears, locked in each other’s embrace as you knelt on the pavement. 

  Don’t let her stay too long.

  That had been one of Akaashi-san’s orders.

  So the three of them didn’t wait it out. By the time that the sun had set, Wataru had already stepped out of the car, taking Ryota with him. He made sure to remind the boy, just in case he’d forgotten.

  “Be gentle, alright?” Wataru reiterated.

  There hadn’t been any need for that, it turned out. 

  He’s sure you’ve never met before, but Wataru saw bitter understanding flash in your eyes when you caught them loitering in front of your house. Fear was there, too, of course. 

  Wataru was convinced that surely it’s a good thing. It saved everyone a lot of time, that way.

  You didn’t even say a word, only giving Wataru a stiff nod when he’d introduced himself, and remained like so on the ride back to Tokyo, with the strap of your handbag trapped by a clenched fist. Wataru didn’t try to initiate small talk; it felt unnecessary.

  It took a while for Wataru to realize that you also hadn’t bothered to change out of your pajamas, though he gave you a couple of minutes to say your farewells. 

  Pajamas, obscured now by a thick, gray coat. 

  Akaashi-san was right.

  You had no plans of coming home. Not tonight. Maybe not for a while.

  Wataru decided not to linger on it anymore. 

  He ignored the blank stare that pierced right through the rear-view mirror. And then, Wataru wondered, hand sweating in his pocket, what the three of them should have for dinner.

Thick chunks of pumpkin melted in your mouth with just the first spoonful of broth. 

  It'd been a while since the last time Akaashi cooked. So, more than anything, it was the sight of him setting plates and utensils that took you aback, greeting you with a, "Welcome home. You're just in time. Food's ready," his sleeves rolled to his elbows while donning your baby owl-printed apron. 

  The taste didn't. Surprise you, that is. He's a good cook. Unlike you, who only became marginally better one hundred burn scars later. 

  It also didn't surprise you that he flew back home at the drop of a hat. Even when he said he'd be gone for a week.

  "How is it?" Akaashi asked after chewing. "Took me a while to make it."

  It obviously did, you thought. When you arrived, Irma Thomas was already begging through the record player.

  "Do you need me, like I need you?" she implored, straight from the heart. "Look at me, I'm crying from holding you." 

  The last song on your favorite record. It was cheap and had the best from the artists you loved. 

  Etta James. Ella Fitzgerald. Aretha Franklin. The Mills Brothers. Bessie Smith. All in one vinyl.

  "Yeah," you replied, clearing your throat when you realized how hard it is to speak. "It's delicious."

  You looked back down to your bowl. The  tofu had gone untouched. Your food was still close to spilling to the brim, while Akaashi was almost finished with his, scrolling on his phone laid on the table.

  "So no one coaxed you into it," you heard him say, and that had ripped your eyes away from the broth like a bandage on an infected wound.

  Akaashi was holding your phone, reading the messages- his number was the only one there, as pealing bells resonated in the dining room. 

  "I'd think of all the things that I wanted of you," cried Irma Thomas. "To make me forget the pain that you caused."

  "I would've known if anyone else talked to you, anyway," he huffed, locking the screen before blowing steam off the morsel. 

  "You would," you conceded. The tofu was soft when you bit into it, sinking into your teeth.

  "I found that in our cabinet. Last time it was in the kitchen drawer, wasn't it?" Akaashi helped himself to a bowl of rice. "Don't leave it in stuffy places. What if you forget where you hid it and you won't know when I call?"

  "And I can no longer keep track of where you are for every moment of the day?" you could hear him say. Though he didn't; though all that could heard, besides the scraping of utensils, was Irma Thomas declaring:

  A fragile thing, like life. It just don't last so long.

  It could be for a minute or an hour. Or then again, from now.

  Your lips tightened with a grin. "I won't do it again, sweetheart," you said, spoon hanging limply in your hold.    

  He didn't need to say it. 

  That your phone has a tracker. That this house is still the same cage that it'd been before. That the only difference between then and now is that silver band on your finger.

  Akaashi’s blinked back at you as he sipped  what remained of the soup. You tried to do the same.

  The savory taste was cloying and it burned in your throat, so you didn't attempt to finish the bowl. It cut down to your heart, sinking heavily on your stomach, bile rising as the song came to a close.

  You gulped it down, though. You had to. And in the final moments, Irma Thompson told you what she really wanted. 

  "Make me forget," she said, "the pain that you'd caused."

  The chorus joined her. "Understanding is a great thing," she concluded. "If it comes from the heart."

  Akaashi was on his own phone this time. Most likely checking on the business that he left, judging by those furrowed brows and that long-suffering look in his eyes.   

  Fizzling noise came at the heels of the fading music. Then, it stopped. And there was nothing left anymore but silence.

  It's over now. Akaashi’s making a move to clean up. You were supposed to say, "That was a lovely dinner, honey." Or, you could tell him to sit down and watch a movie with you when he's done. 

  "I'll help you with the dishes," you wanted to say. 

  I'll help you with the dishes. It was so easy to say. 

  Instead, what came out of your mouth was a hushed call for his name.

  "Kei-kun," you repeated, brittle and weak and dry.  

  "I'm so sorry," you might've mouthed. 

  You could barely hear your own voice as you looked at him. Akaashi paused from tidying the table. 

  You're parched and a lot has happened today. Gathering the courage to take that first step out of the city had taken what little strength you had. The fear never left you. Seeing your old house almost ended you. 

  It should be physically impossible for you to still be able to cry. And yet there doesn't seem to be an end to your tears now, the same way your apologies unfurled in an embarrassingly infinite string.

  "Don't lock me inside here again," you whispered, clinging to him as he shushed you, wiping your cheeks with his thumbs as he helped you drink a glass of water.

  He carried you to your room and sat you down on the bed, right between his thighs. You sobbed into your hands, tears and snot on the sleeves of your pajama top.

  "I- I just wanted to see them. That's all. Just one day, Kei-kun. One day. I was gonna come back, I swear." 

  You're rambling. You're a madwoman pleading and bargaining with a stone-cold judge because playing house is the only thing keeping her alive. 

  And you messed that up you foolish, foolish girl.

  "Please don't hurt my family," you heaved. "They're all I have left."

  Akaashi doesn't speak, not for a while, but when he did, you bawled harder.

  "I can kill them all," he said, matter of factly. 

  It is true. Hearing him say it does not make it easier to take, though. 

  "I can hurt you the same way that you hurt me."

  Your neck strained as he tipped your chin towards him with a slender finger. 

  "I can break you," he muttered, not batting an eye.

  That, too, is true. You know it all too well. He said it with such serenity, still and undisturbed by the shaking of your head, because it goes without saying. 

  Except, you, too, know it. 

  When he is breaking. When he is falling apart.

  He smothered you, taking your entire body to curl against you, making himself small as he pressed his face on your back.

  "Yet- and yet I-" Akaashi sniffled. You felt your shirt dampen. "I've given you everything."

  When he finally brought his face close to yours, he looked so lost. Almost like a little boy who's on the verge of drowning,  clinging desperately onto a lifesaver and too shocked to shout for help. 

  You hated him all the more for it.

  "Each other," he said, snarling, almost, through tears as he grabbed your face with both hands. "That's all we have left, you hear? You and I. Husband and wife."

  He seized your jaw and turned it towards the vanity mirror.

  The room was dark save for the light in the hallway, peeking into the crack through the doorway. 

  But you could see yourself. And you could see your hand intertwined in his, your rings gleaming like muted starlights. 

  "We made a vow," he whispered, kissing your ring finger. 

  A detached part of you is astonished with how inescapable it is. Whether it be a reward or a punishment; a good day or a bad one.

  No matter what happens, you always end up like this, don't you? 

  Begging to him with your legs spread wide.

  You did as you'd always done when he began unbuttoning your top. 

  You go back to that autumn morning, when you first laid your eyes on him, a cup of coffee in his hand, and you thought that he had the prettiest face you'd ever seen.

  You go back to when he was just this really romantic guy who sent you flowers every day. There was a letter, every time. 

  Nothing too grandiose. Just short messages hoping that you'd have a great day ahead.

  He kissed your neck, wet smooches and long, flat-tongued licks dipping down your shoulder.

  He watched you through the mirror, his eyes a pair of darkened blues daring you to look away.

  Akaashi Keiji was your boyfriend, you told yourself. You dated him for quite some time before you married.

  Akaashi Keiji got along well with your father and doted on your mother. On Sundays, you visit them and they send you back to Tokyo with ripe watermelons. 

  Akaashi Keiji has never hurt you.

  The man tracing the hem of your bra, cupping your clothed tits and drawing lazy circles over nipples, however, did.

  (And he still will in future. He still is, right now.)

  This man is the real one. 

  And you have angered him, so he will not make this easy for you.

  "What did you promise me?" Akaashi whispered as he lightly bit the shell of your ear. "Or have you forgotten?"

  Of course, you haven't forgotten. You were chained to this very room when you made them, after all.

  "N-no, I remember," you said, catching your breath. "I remember, Kei-kun."

  "Then say it," he said. "Look at me."

  You shivered as his palms swept over your  stomach; as he unfastened your bra, letting it fall down your arms.

  "Look at me when you say it."

  You felt your nipples harden, gooseprickles spread all over you, as the air hit your bare skin, cooling the sweat that made it glisten.

  "Please," he rasped.

  The eyes of the woman in the mirror was hooded, threatening to close as she puffed with each squeeze and caress to her tits, swiveling her hips against her husband’s crotch as he grinded into her. 

  "I will be happy," she said.

  Akaashi nuzzled your temple, using his rough fingers to tease your nipples just as he did, brushing them to and fro, then grazing the bumpy skin around until you're squeaking out his name. 

  And when he began pressing down on the stiff peaks with his thumbs, before rolling and pulling at them, the heels of his palm digging into your tits, you saw the woman claw at her husband's hair, a graceless affair that almost scratched his eye out, making him reach for both her arms to wrap them around his neck. 

  "I- I will..!" Her lips parted in a breathless scream and it was disgusting how lewd she appeared. "I will not run away!"

  The streak of tears on his cheeks touched yours when he kissed you. His lips were soft and warm, his wet tongue gliding in so slowly as he deepened the kiss with a throaty groan.

  His other hand crawled down to your soaked panties. You couldn't contain the mewl that left you.

  Both of you gasped and struggled to breathe again after you parted from each other.  

  "You understand, don't you?" he rasped.   

  Two of his fingers slid down your folds, only to slither back up, then down again, smearing your cunt with its own slick.

  But he never touched your swollen clit, even though it's throbbing and aching to be rubbed and the hard bulge sitting between your ass grew harder the more you squirmed in his hold, whimpering like a bitch in heat.  

  You heard your husband sigh, his hot breath tickling you when he said, "This isn't about you now."

Belly pushed into the edge of the dressing table, rattling and battering against the wall with each forceful thrust, and your leg perched atop it, made numb by Akaashi's grip on your thigh.

  That was the first thing that you could recall when you opened your eyes.

  But your entire body was screaming in pain, so you knew that everything else that happened last night would come back to you soon enough.

  The flesh had a memory of its own. 

  You sat up with a groan and you didn't have to see the marks to know.

  His teeth were still nipping at you, biting you until they drew blood, only to follow with an apologetic lapping of his tongue. 

  You could feel him beneath you, his hands clawing you down to him, palms kneading your ass cheeks as you bounced up and down on his cock.

  You could feel him above you, gripping your wrists not unlike the cuffs that once kept you shackled. He had your legs wrapped around his waist, pulling you close to him, filling you up with loads and loads of cum, squelching every time he sank down your weeping hole.

  And when your vision began to blur at the edges, he carried your body, mere seconds into fainting, to the dressing table. 

  The evidence of that stared back at you in shameful streaks and smudges, traces of your fingers on the mirror when he rammed your cunt from behind.

  "Are you happy?" Akaashi whispered.

  You don't know. 

  When he's just your husband who comes home to your arms and brings you sweets because he knows how much you love them; who dances with you in the kitchen and listens intently to you when you talk about that cute dog you saw at the park, were you happy, then?

  You don't know, but the woman in the mirror, in that moment, surely was.

  She even said, "Yes, yes, Kei-kun, right there, fuck me right there!"

  Her pupils were blown wide, eyes rolling almost over to the back of her head. And despite the cries that escaped her, there was a wide, dissipated smile on her lips,  spit trailing down her chin.

  "Look at you," Akaashi said, grunting when your walls tightened around his shaft. "You're clearly happy with me."

  "So why? Why'd you even think of leaving?" He rocked his hips, grinding his thick cock against that spot that had you holding onto the mirror. "Don't ever do that to me again." 

  You told him no, no, you won't run away again, but it didn't seem to placate his unease, nor his tears.

  "I'm so scared, everyday, that you'll leave me and- and- it feels like hell. I would rather die." 

  He kissed your nape as he huffed and said, "Because I don't know what I'll do without you."

  You never really understood why; what about you had caused him to single you out in the sea of people that had vied for his attention. Especially now as you looked at yourself in the mirror.

  There were dark circles under your eyes and Akaashi’s t-shirt was rumpled on your body, engulfing you whole with its size— a far cry from that lovely, dazzling bride that his best friend, Bokuto, had described you as on your wedding day. 

  But you’re aware, more than anyone, that Akaashi Keiji is the last person to care about appearances. 

  When he entered the room, carrying a tray in his hands, he gazed at that disheveled girl with eyebags big enough to be dragged around the same way he looked at her when he waited for her at the end of the aisle.

  “I made you pancakes,” he muttered, clearing his throat as he sat down beside you.

  You were tired so it didn’t dawn on you as quickly as it should that he made them the way you preferred. Four fluffy pieces stacked atop one another, sprinkled with powdered sugar, whipped cream and a smattering of berries on the side.

  He fiddled with his fingers when you only stared at it, so you immediately took the fork in your hand and sliced the pancake in half.

  “I’ll be taking some time off work,” Akaashi said as you took the food in your mouth. You only nodded, having noticed that he wasn’t wearing the usual bespoke suit as soon as he entered the room.

  You felt him near you; felt his hand, warm to touch, cup your face.

  “I didn’t mean to hurt you.” His eyes were misty and, this close, it seemed that he, too, wasn’t in a good shape. “So please-” Akaashi licked his chapped lips, “Please don’t go.”

  “I won’t,” you replied, giving him the smile that you knew he needed. “I promise.”

  Then, as you moved to kiss him on the cheek, the chains that tethered you to the bedpost clinked softly beneath the blanket, and you didn’t bother to keep the tears at the bay.

  Akaashi wiped them for you when you said that you loved him. And when he asked why, you only shrugged and told him that the pancakes were so sweet that they could make anyone cry. 

[lisinfleur]

Bedtime Secrets

The request:

Author’s Notes | I love sweet requests like this for our sweet prince. He deserves some happiness after all. Universe | Vikings Pairing | Ivar x Reader Info | Viking Age AU, requested by anon for 5CW Ivar II, posted for HTGI Event. Words | 1146 ⁑ Warnings: None

From the beginning, you thought that marriage would be a disaster. Not that he wasn't a blessed man, nor you had anything against his condition - as some would meanly say. But you could see he wasn't exactly planning to get married when your father brought the idea to the table where your fate was sealed beside king Ivar the Boneless from Kattegat.

"A pledge of allegiance and long bond," your father said. What better way to tell a king you trust him than offering him your best and bigger treasure?

Definitely not what you wanted for your life. Like all the other women of your age, you wanted to find somebody to love.

You weren't unaware of your condition: as a landlord's daughter, you knew your marriage would much probably be arranged to grant your people's best life, but you asked the gods many times that your marriage would come to join you to a man that would, at least, allow you to reach his heart.

How would you reach anything inside those cold and sharp blue eyes your father delivered you to?

Your marriage was poorly consummated the night it happened. Ivar was an occupied man. Tired from hanging with the Earls, Kings, and other guests of your marriage - which was absolutely bigger than you ever thought your party would be - he touched you a single time.

Nothing but seal the union the ring on your finger had represented.

But the gods decided to send him a message - or strike him right in the middle of his face: You fell pregnant with a single touch of his body. His seed grew roots in your womb from that single moment the two of you shared and then, you saw it change in his eyes.

He didn't become the most loving of the husbands, but his blues weren't that cold for you anymore.

As your father told you, Ivar was a man of his faith, and the idea of having a marriage visibly blessed by the gods was enough to warm his heart towards you.

You were spoiled and covered with the best through your whole pregnancy. You had servants all over you. Anything would stop to tend for your needs.

You never had really tried to approach your husband, afraid he would reject your feelings or make you feel silly for being so emotional. But his reaction to your pregnancy was changing it into you.

And when you gave birth to a beautiful little girl, your walls were completely crumbled by Ivar's teary eyes.

Watching your husband holding your little girl in his arms was the most tender moment you ever saw in your life. His kisses to her forehead, his words whispered to her ears, every single detail of him crushed the fear of your heart by showing he was so much more than his fame would speak about him.

He was ruthless in battle, but his hands were tender to touch your little girl's blankets. He could be a monster to his enemies, but he was the warm embrace your daughter would sleep so easily in.

Little every day, you discovered your husband was as much a loving man as he was a fierce warrior.

Perhaps your dreams became true before you could really notice.

Perhaps there was a chance for you to reach that man's heart.

Not the ruthless king, nor the fearless warrior, but the loving father you watched sitting beside your little one's crib, telling her stories, waving his hands, and making sounds just to get more giggles from your baby girl.

You'd been attracted by the growls in his voice and your baby's loud giggles. And your eyes watched as he told her stories from the gods, playing with his hands your daughter tried to reach for a while. Then the stories became calmer as the little one laid down, watching Ivar's movements from inside her crib.

Soon, he was whispering a low song. And you watched as your little girl embraced her blanket, falling asleep peacefully at the sound of his voice.

Ivar stayed there for a long while, caressing your little girl's face. His rough fingers marked by swords and daggers were so gentle when touching her face. His face, usually so hard, was so tranquil. And his eyes were placid lakes instead of those sharp blades of ice you remember seeing the first time you've seen each other.

Maybe there was space for you there. Perhaps your fear to approach was keeping you from reaching your dreams in his arms.

You dared.

Your steps entered the room slowly, and you sat beside Ivar, catching his eyes almost immediately.

His gentle touch reached your face. His fingers caressed your chin, sliding as you leaned your face into his warm palm.

"My beautiful wife," he mumbled.

Sweet words you had never heard from him, maybe because you never approached enough to hear him speak.

"You came into my life unwarned. I even thought it was a mistake to bring such a delicate treasure into my mess. But look how silly and wrong I was."

Your eyes found his. To your major surprise, his eyes were full of love, his touches were full of tenderness, and you saw yourself leaning into his arms, laying your head against his chest, feeling as Ivar embraced you warmly.

"You're my gift from the gods. And you brought joy into my life. I couldn't be more grateful."

You lifted your face and gently placed your lips over his, kissing him slowly, receiving a tender answer you never thought you would ever get from him so freely.

Smiling was almost inevitable.

"My loving husband," you mumbled. "I'm the lucky woman the gods chose to be by your side. I'm the one who's grateful over everything."

Your eyes watched his lips curling in a beautiful scene you'd seen so few times since you'd known each other.

Ivar was smiling at you, almost like a shy boy, flattered by your words.

"You're so humble, my queen. And it just makes you shine more in my eyes. Come," he said, getting up and holding you by the hand. "Let us close the hall and retire for this day. I wanna spoil my queen tonight and maybe make our joy even bigger, who knows?"

He was clearly saying he wanted to be with you.

To produce more children, which were the joy of his life.

Your heart filled with happiness, and it was your time to smile at him.

"Then may the gods bless me tonight, husband, so I can bring you more joy than you ever thought you could have."

You would remember to thank the gods for your blessings. Ivar was everything you could ever want and, in the end, your dreams couldn't really show you how good would it be to be loved like you were.

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[bored-mumma]

Thor Odinson - Fluff alphabet

MASTERLIST

A = Attractive. What do they find attractive about the other?

Thor found your bravery unbelievably attractive. It would never matter who you were up against, you always gave it your all and never ever backed down. He admired that about you. 

B = Baby. Do they want a family? Why/Why not?

He wouldn’t mind children. His entire life he had always yo-yo’d between wanting them or not but he believes now he’s finally made the decision to have them. Having a son or daughter to carry on the family name and to pass on his wisdom, it sounds like a dream.

C = Cuddle. How do they cuddle?

His arm beneath your head, you using it as a pillow. You would cuddle into his side as he uses his other hand to stroke shapes onto your skin. 

D = Dates. What are dates with them like?

Very, very rare. Thor wasn’t particularly keen on actual dates. You would more just spend your evenings together watching the telly or going for walks. Its very simple but rather intimate moments, although not technically dates.

E = Everything. You are my ____ (e.g. my life, my world…)

You are my reason to smile.

F = Feelings. When did they know they were falling in love?

It took Thor a little while to realise his feelings for you. He would love to admit it was love at first sight but it wasn’t. He always thought you were very good looking, very kind, very intelligent. But it did take Thor nearly a year to realise that he doesn’t just like spending time with you because you’re a good friend of his. He realised he could never stop thinking about you and when you said someone had asked you for a drink, a wave of jealousy went through him - Making him finally realise his love for you.

G = Gentle. Are they gentle? If so, how?

He’s always gentle with you. He knows his strength and will always be careful. Not just physically though but emotionally or verbally too. Even if Thor is extremely angry or upset, he’ll never yell at you. He’ll never speak harshly or say things he may regret. He’s a gentle giant.

H = Holding Hands. How do they like to hold hands?

Gently with your fingers intertwined. 

I = Impression. First impression/s?

He didn’t really notice you much. You were just another Stark employee hired to help the Avengers as much as possible. It wasn’t until the both of you had to work pretty closely for a mission that Thor really started to notice you.

J- Joker. Are they into pulling pranks?

Not particularly. He’ll joke around with you and have fun but actual pranks he’s not too keen. Probably a side effect of growing up with Loki as a brother.

K = Kiss. How do they kiss?

He usually gently holds your chin in his large hands, lifting your face to look at him. He’ll start off gently dragging his lips against yours but will quickly turn more needy.

L = Love. Who says ‘I love you’ first?

You did. You were always the more forward one in this relationship and had no problem admitting you were utterly in love with the God. At first, Thor was taken back at your vocalised love but it only took a moment for him to return it

M = Memory. What’s their favourite memory together?

When he brought you to Asgard to meet his family - more importantly, to meet his mother. He would never admit it but he was desperate for her approval. Which of course, she gave. Watching you and his mother happily chatting, speaking of your mutual admiration of Thor and of each other, made his heart swell with pride. 

N = Nickel. Do they spoil? Do they buy the person they love everything?

Not so much on Earth as he doesn’t have much money. But when you go to Asgard? oh my god. Everyday is a new outfit for you to wear with matching accessories and shoes. Everyday is a new bath scent for you. Everyday he’ll bring you books, flowers, food, art, jewels. You always try to return the favour but Thor is definitely the God of gift giving.

O = Orange. What colour reminds them of their other half?

Red. His signature colour that you started to wear a lot when you began dating seriously. Thor will always buy you some red roses or red earrings because the view of you wearing his colours is one he’ll dream of with a smile for the rest of his life.

P = Petnames. What petnames do they use?

My dear or my Darling are the most common.

Q = Quaint. What is their favourite non-modern thing?

Horse riding. It’s a very normal thing to do on Asgard  but on Midguard its a little less modern. 

R = Rainy Day

Thor loves the rain! He bought an extra large umbrella to hold for you both when you go for a rainy day walk. He finds them so peaceful and enjoys your company.

S = Sad. How do they cheer themselves/others up?

His sadness tends to turn into anger. When that happens he’ll throw himself into battles and take it out on anyone on the opposite side. You will always try to help him, to get him to talk. But sometimes you just need to allow him to get on with it in the way he deems fit.

T = Talking. What do they like to talk about?

He loves to learn about you and your culture. Not just that but loves just hearing about you in general. Every evening he’ll ask how your day was and unlike most people, he’s honestly interested in what you want to say.

U = Unencumbered. What helps them relax?

Thor adores you playing with his hair. He’ll sit on the floor with you sat on the chair behind him and rest his head on your thighs. Dragging your nails across his scalp, you’ll style, plait and play with it as it relaxes you too.

V = Vaunt. What do they like to show off? What are they proud of?

His history. There is nothing he loves more than telling people tales of the glorious battles he’s fought or of the amazing planets he’s visited. Tales you will never get tired of hearing.

W = Wedding. When, how, where do they propose?

He had planned the perfect proposal. He took Clint with him to find a ring - him being the only Avenger with a long, successful marriage. He planned a romantic day of your favourite things only to return home with your living room to be filled with your favourite flowers. That is when he would get down on one knee.

You however had other plans. Three days before the amazing day Thor had planned, you two were cuddling in bed when you looked up at him, saw the love in his eyes and decided right then and there to say. “I think we should get married.” Thors eyes widened as he grinned, a sign that you two were on the same page. “Will you marry me, Thor?”

X = Xylophone. What’s their song?

Falling - Harry Styles. 

Not that Thor will admit to many people he actually really adores that song.

Y = You. You are the ___ to my ___ (e.g. the cookies to my milk, the macaroni to my cheese)

You are the thunder to my lightening.

Z = Zebra. If they wanted a pet, what would they get?

Thor might want a cat but he really doesn’t care much. If you want one, go for it but he’ll never ask for one.

[ethanesimp]

LET ME GO // V. D. A.

Pairing: Servant! Victoria De Angelis x Royal GN! Reader

Summary: You're cornered into making a decision that won't only break your heart but Vic's too.

Request: Maybe something that makes me cry

Warnings: Angst, mentions of death threats and death, arranged marriage, swearing

Word Count: 3.1k

Masterlist // Taglist link in bio

Taglist: @superchrystaldrug @reputationdamiano @ethaneskin @dont-let-me-drown-in-you @bidet-and-legolas​

A/N: I hope this is sad enough nonnie and that you like it :) It's my first time writing for Vic so I hope y'all enjoy reading as much as I did writing it! And yess, we’re still continuing this angst fest :)

Love was a double-edged sword.

That was one of the first things you learned in your life. You’d see people in pain, crying and destroying themselves for it. It took you a long time to understand why one would do so much for a person, what was so special about them to sacrifice so much?

It took Victoria for you to fully understand. She was undoubtedly one of the most beautiful, energetic, and sweetest people you’d ever met. Those gorgeous blue eyes and endearing laugh made you fall head over heels for the girl you often saw around the castle ever since you were little. 

Ever since you shared your first kiss with her at the back of the stables while your friend Thomas looked out for guards, you knew your relationship was going to live on borrowed time but had always refused to dwell on the thought too much.

You were aware the circumstances you lived in were like a ticking time bomb stuck to your back. It was far too obvious and you’d be too naïve to think otherwise considering you were a member of royalty and the kingdom would eventually be your burden to carry. However, what you weren’t aware of was how easily things would fall apart or when, or how quickly. 

You’d already spent three years of pure bliss next to Victoria, sneaking around the castle and stealing moments and memories only the two of you knew about. You couldn’t deny that you’d always longed for more, to be able to show all your love for her in public and ask her to rule the kingdom by your side, but no amount of dreaming or wondering about what if’s would ever make your situation any different.

Six words were all it took for your bubble of denial to finally burst. Those six little words kept on repeating inside your head over and over again as you held Victoria in your arms. Her pretty eyes were looking into yours and a sad smile adorned her face as you brushed her hair back with your fingers. You could see the tears in her eyes and knew she could see yours, but neither of you dared to comment on it yet.

It was a delicate subject and neither of you wanted to talk first in fear of triggering an argument, even if you were both aware it was coming soon and there was no way to stop it. So you just sat there together in complete silence. The only thing that could be heard was the sporadic sounds of the window creaking because of the wind and the soft crack of wood burning on the large fireplace. 

You placed a soft peck on her lips and caressed her cheek delicately with your thumb, also removing the tears from her rosy cheeks. You pressed your forehead against hers and tightly closed your eyes as you smelled the sweet scent of flowers that hung in the air because of the small flowers woven into her light hair. 

Her arms were tightly wrapped around your body as if she was afraid that you’d suddenly vanish in the form of smoke and would slip from her fingers. You held her closer as a form of reassurance and sighed when you felt her once quiet sobs turn so violent they’d shake her whole body. 

“I’m sorry,” You mumbled and rubbed circles on her exposed back. You wanted nothing more than to take away all the pain she felt and let her know things would be alright, but you didn’t want to lie to her either, “I’m so sorry you had to see all that amore.”

She shook her head and buried her face against your chest as she cried harder. Victoria had always been so strong, so unbreakable, yet those six little words had just broken her and her heart into a thousand pieces. 

You’re getting married tomorrow. No questions. 

You’d been set to marry the heir of a nearby kingdom ever since you were a little kid, promised away to the other royal in exchange for resources to save a dying kingdom and they’d told you all about it in front of your friends… and your girlfriend. 

Your father had made you meet them right in front of her. The young royal, ignorant to your situation, had even gone as far as to kiss both your cheeks and quickly peck your lips. You had all been so taken aback by it, but no one commented on it because it would look suspicious. 

Even though all you wanted to do was take Victoria and run as far away as your legs would take you, the conversation you’d had with your father just minutes before the announcement stopped you from even trying. 

He looked exasperated, angry. You’d tried to browse your mind for anything you’d done wrong as of late but couldn’t come up with anything. There was no reason for him to be as mad as he seemed. 

“I seem so stupid to you, don’t I? You ungrateful child,” He’d spoken, tone sharp and voice laced with venom. You had flinched at how harsh his words sounded, still clueless as to what he was talking about, “I could put up with you not giving a shit about the Kingdom that will soon be yours because you’d have to stop that childish behavior of yours. But sneaking around with a maid’s daughter? That’s just ludicrous!”

Your heart fell to your stomach right then and there. He knew.

“I have tried so much, given you every single thing you wanted to hopefully get you to listen, but I’m tired of playing nice. You’re getting married tomorrow. No questions. And don’t you dare try and run away unless you want all her friends and family killed the second you step foot out of this castle.”

 She thankfully hadn’t heard your father’s words and you weren’t planning on telling her a thing. You knew for sure that if she’d heard, you would’ve already lost her. She had always been one to stand up against things that were wrong, and that time wouldn’t have been an exception. Unfortunately, your father was anything but lenient and you had no doubt that if she even thought of raising her voice at him things would end in chaos. 

“This is so unfair,” She murmured against your chest as more sobs escaped her lips. You stroked her head gently and nodded, “I know it is, I know.”

Then, she raised her head and looked at you with excited eyes as she wiped her tears away. She had an idea and you had a feeling you wouldn’t like it, “Let’s run away, Y/N. Right now. I have an aunt who lives far away in a kingdom where they will never find us! And we can be happy.”

Your gaze softened at her words. There was nothing you wanted more than to run away with Victoria, far from your parents and the responsibilities you’d been born into. You would’ve tried it too had your father not threatened to kill her family and friends if you did so. But you weren’t going to say a thing. 

“Victoria… We can’t- I can’t,” Her smile fell the moment she heard your words. She pulled away and left your embrace, making you instantly miss the warmth of her body pressed against yours.

Victoria sat down next to you, her eyes focused on yours as if she were trying to read your mind, “What do you mean you can’t? This hasn’t been the first time we’ve talked about it and you’ve always agreed to do it if we ever needed it, which we do now. What’s changed?” 

You had to look away after hearing just how hurt she sounded. You didn’t want to see her cry again because you knew you’d end up telling her every single thing your father told you. Anything would’ve been better than having to tell her, so you decided to say something that would not only break her heart but yours too, “I just can’t, okay? Vic, we were being childish! I cannot just flee the kingdom and expect no consequences. That was a stupid idea that would never work. I need to serve my duty, not run off with some servant’s daughter and forget all about my responsibilities here!”

She moved even further away from you. Victoria didn’t even try to hide the hurt caused by your words, “Oh, okay. I get it now,” She nodded and laughed bitterly as she turned around and gathered all the clothes that had previously been scattered all over the room, ”All this time I’ve been nothing but a fool...

“You know, when this all started between us, my friends kept telling me you were just using me for your amusement,” Victoria spoke. Her tone almost made you flinch because it just had as much venom laced in it as your father’s had earlier that day, “I never believed it, you know? I thought you loved me! But no, you’re just as hungry for power as all those fucking bastards, and I was nothing more than just your little game.” 

Her words felt like agonizingly painful stabs to the heart. You didn’t give a shit about power, about the kingdom, about anything but her. However, you weren’t selfish enough to be driven by your desire to be with her, a desire that was almost a need at that point. At least not after knowing everything that was on the line. Her family… her friends, friends who had become your own too. 

Oh how much you wanted to cave in. You wanted to reach out to her and wrap your arms around her frame while you told her just how sorry you were, how much you didn’t mean those words. But you stayed quiet instead and listened to her insults, took them in, and tried your hardest not to flinch or shed a tear, as much as it hurt to do so.

You didn’t stop her either when she ran out the door, tired from crying and screaming at you. Instead, you waited until she harshly shut the door behind her to finally cry. You cried and cried for what seemed like an eternity, got up from the bed, and tore the room to pieces out of pure frustration and hatred to both the universe and your parents for doing this to you. 

It felt like everything was moving in slow motion as you smashed the mirror to pieces with your shoe and tore off the blue wallpaper from the walls. Then, with weak knees and a heavy heart, you slid down the wall and sat on the floor.  You pressed your forehead to your knees and placed your hands over your face as you cried some more. 

Eventually, you fell asleep, exhausted from all the crying and heartbreak you were feeling, wanting nothing but for it to stop. Not too far away, Victoria was being held in the arms of her best friend, who held her while she cried and fell apart in his embrace. No one who was with the two knew what to say. Contrary to what Victoria had said in an attempt to hurt you, all her friends believed you were head over heels for her. Everyone knew you’d do every single thing she asked, but they had all been proven wrong. 

─────────༺♡༺─────────

There was an instant the next morning when you woke up, everything still foggy, where you forgot everything that had gone down the day before. You should’ve held onto those seconds tighter, but your brain didn’t let you as it brought back all the memories from the previous night like violent waves breaking into the shore, so painfully you had to hold your head with your hands.

When a servant walked in, he didn’t question the broken glass scattered all over the wooden floor, neither did he comment on the bare walls and the fact that you looked terrible. He didn’t because he was one of Victoria’s closest friends, Damiano. He silently pieced the story together in his mind and felt his heart break for his two dear friends.

He’d once described you two as a melody. A beautiful one that seemed to flow smoothly and left everyone around them speechless because the force in it was something that no one ever expected from such a quiet-sounding and delicate piece. You loved each other with everything you had, kissed each other like that time would be the last, and now, when you needed all that power and force, you weren’t using it. It made him sad and he couldn’t help but compare you two to an instrument that had gotten out of tune during an important solo. 

Minutes before entering the room, he’d been ready to lash out at you for breaking his sister’s heart, but the mere sight of you made him reconsider. Especially when you looked at him with red eyes and tear-stained cheeks. You looked into his eyes with so much panic and desperation as you spoke up, voice hoarse and barely inaudible, “I’m so sorry.”

He crouched down to your level and didn’t hesitate to wrap his arms around your body and hold you like he’d held Victoria the night before. Damiano, for the first time in a while, was out of words to say. He wanted to understand what had happened because Victoria had been so distraught the night before that her words had come out in, mostly, incoherent mumbles that not even Thomas or Ethan could catch. 

“What happened Y/N?” He asked in the sweetest, most delicate voice he could muster. It caught him off-guard how you started crying even harder at his question and gripped the collar of his shirt so tightly he was afraid of getting choked by a heartbroken you.

After a few sniffles, you spoke up. Thankfully, your words were much clearer than Victoria’s had been, “I fucked up, Damiano. That’s what happened,” You hiccuped, “I’m nothing but a coward. When my father threatened to kill her family I just stood there looking so fucking stupid. I just nodded along to everything he was saying.”

Damiano’s brown eyes opened wide as he processed your words, “He did what?” You brought a hand to your face and pulled at your hair in frustration at the realization that you had let those words slip. No one was supposed to know, especially not the person who was so close to her that he was basically her brother.

But the secret you’d tried so hard to hide was now out and it felt like a breath of fresh air after being close to suffocating, so you told him everything. All the words spilled out of your mouth and you didn’t even try to stop them. In fact, the exact opposite thing happened and you told him everything with as much detail as possible to the point where a little movie seemed to be playing inside your head.

He didn’t say a word until you finished talking. By that point, you had already calmed down enough to only sniff every once in a while, which was nothing compared to how distraught and shaken up you’d been minutes earlier. That’s when it dawned on him that the only thing you needed was to talk, it also explained why Victoria had been so heartbroken. She didn’t know about it…

It was like you were able to hear his thoughts, because the moment he opened his mouth to speak, you interrupted him, “No. I cannot tell Vic and neither can you. I know you love her just as much as I do and you know how she’d take this… Look, I can live happily if I know she’s out there, safe. How would I ever live with myself if she was gone and it was all my fault?”

His heart broke at your words, but he truly had no clue what he could ever say to make you feel any better, so the only thing he did was hold you closer and let you cry some more.

-

He eventually had to leave before another servant walked in to help you get ready for ‘the big day’. The other servant didn’t question the looks of your room either and stayed quiet as they helped you into the outfit that had been selected for you to wear to the wedding. You almost wanted to chuckle, you had no choice on who’d be there at the altar by your side and it seemed like you had no choice in what you’d be wearing either.

To anyone who’d seen you walk down the halls of the castle would’ve easily mistaken your frown for nothing more than being nervous at the thought of getting married. Hell, Damiano had even told you that a rumor had spread around the castle quickly after everyone found out about you being engaged. 

It was, apparently, no secret to any of the servants that you were seeing someone. Anyone who didn’t know any better had thought it had been the other royal you were set to marry. That you’d spend blissful hours sneaking around the castle, eager to finally unite and live together forever. They weren’t exactly wrong. You did wish for that with everything you had, but not for the person who was already anxiously waiting at the altar for you to walk in.

No. You wanted all that with the blond-haired girl that sat at the very back, with her hair neatly braided back and a few flowers adding a pop of color to her head. You almost wanted to chuckle when you saw she wasn’t wearing a dress. Ever since you were little kids and she’d started working around the castle, she’d begged your father to let her wear a pair of jeans instead of the skirts maids would wear. He hadn’t seen it as a huge deal and ever since he allowed her to do so, you’d never seen her in a skirt, ever, much less a dress. 

As you stood at the altar, you often looked for her in the crowd. Thankfully enough, she’d stayed with her eyes glued to the floor for most of the ceremony and hadn’t caught you staring, not once. Everything that followed seemed to happen so quickly you spaced out over most of it. It hurt, but Damiano’s reassuring smiles and just looking at Victoria gave you enough strength to keep the tears in.

You never thought that’s how your life would go, but you were thankful because at least she’d be safe. She’d have the chance to find someone else and fall in love one day. You only hoped that eventually, when many years had passed, Damiano would tell her all of the truth and maybe, just maybe, she’d find it in herself to forgive you for it all. 

[hotkoyo]

SFW Howie Alphabet Headcanons

Author's Note: When will my husband come home from war?

Disclaimer: These headcanons are based on how I imagine Howie to be based on the game. You don't have to agree with what I say here as everyone is free to have their own ideas.

𝄥 𝄞 ── 𝄇

A = Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?)

VERY affectionate. I honestly feel like he grew up surrounded with so much love and now he’s just overflowing with it. Howie is all about showing his love through warm hugs, having his arm around you, swinging your hands as you walk, head pats, you name it. Another one, in my opinion, is words of affirmation. He'd tell you how much you matter to him through words, like quoting lines from his favorite movies and saying "I love you" before you both go to sleep.

B = Best friend (What would they be like as a best friend? How would the friendship start?)

Affectionate. Lots of play fighting and cuddling during movie sessions. Singing to Disney songs at the top of your lungs. You guys make friendship bracelets for each other (and he never takes off his). Definitely one of those dudes who drive their best friend everywhere.

C = Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?)

If it’s not apparent already, this dude is a giant golden retriever and he lives for the cuddles. He is born to cuddle, baby. Due to his size, it’s natural that he ends up as a big spoon more often than not but he definitely loves the moments he gets to be the small spoon.

D = Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?)

So domestic, even when you guys just started dating. It’s easy to imagine yourself settling down with someone as warm and comforting as Howie. He would love to settle down and build a home with you and you guys love having conversations about your dream house and how your life would be like in five, ten years. He’s alright at cooking in general but can cook some amazing Chinese dishes that his mom taught him.

E = Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)

It would be hard for him to get out of a relationship, to be completely honest. He’s one of those people who easily gets attachment issues and finds it hard to move on from a relationship. If he really has to be the one to end the relationship, he would want to talk it out with you and try to end your relationship on a good note. I feel like he’s one of those people who really values respect, even when things aren’t working out anymore between you two.

F = Fiance(e) (How do they feel about commitment? How quick would they want to get married?)

Howie is a hopeless romantic and while he does have his insecurities, I feel like he would really love to commit to someone. In terms of marriage, it really depends on you. I don’t think his career would hinder him much when it comes to popping the question, to be honest. If he feels like he’s comfortable enough with the relationship and sees that you are, too, I think he’d propose to you when he feels like the time is right.

G = Gentle (How gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)

Howie is a textbook example of a gentle giant. He knows he’s strong so physically, he knows when to hold back a bit. Emotionally, it’s canon that he’s a soft and caring boy through and through and he would never hurt you on purpose.

H = Hugs (Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?)

Ugh, he LOVES hugs. It’s canon that the Yan fam is really good with hugs so if you need a pick-me-up, he’s your man. Whenever you guys are alone, he acts like an overgrown koala because he can’t get enough of hugging you. If hot chocolate is a hug, it’s what Howie’s would feel like. Warm, familiar, and comforting.

I = I love you (How fast do they say the L-word?)

He knows he loves you when he does but holds back a lot in fear of coming off too strong. If he feels that you feel the same, then he would say it pretty quickly into the relationship or during a spur of a moment. If it seems that you need more time, he would hold back just so that you wouldn't feel uncomfortable.

J = Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What do they do when they’re jealous?)

He’s the type who’s less jealous and more insecure. His jealousy isn’t going to make him act rashly and put you on the spot. It’s slow and creeping and you might not notice at first because of how well he conceals it but it becomes apparent by the way he starts to act distant.

K = Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?)

Warm and gentle. His kisses make you feel so safe and loved and he likes to take the time to show you how he feels through the gesture. He loves to kiss you everywhere but his favorite places to kiss you are your nose and temples.

Also, kiss him on the forehead and he’d melt into a puddle. Another one of his hotspots is at the back of his neck. Kiss him there and watch him sputter as he tries to gain back his bearings.

L = Little ones (How are they around children?)

He loves kids, kids love him. He humors the kids a lot and is a great impersonator so prepare yourself for some improvised skits in front of the kiddos. Can’t say no to the kids, though, so you might have to step in from time to time. Kids treat him like a human jungle gym. Which he actually is.

M = Morning (How are mornings spent with them?)

I definitely see him as a morning person. Also, he’s so fit that you can’t tell me he doesn’t workout every single morning. Probably goes on an early jog and is one of those people who seems so chipper even if it's only seven in the morning.

N = Night (How are nights spent with them?)

Have you seen actors with their stage makeup on? There’s no way Howie’s skin stays so smooth and supple without some form of skincare routine. Has his own skincare routine and loves doing it with you together in front of the mirror (while making faces at you). After a good skincare session, he'll sit on the couch or in bed with you cuddled up to him as he reads scripts from his new upcoming projects.

O = Open (When would they start revealing things about themselves? Do they say everything all at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?)

Depending on how much he trusts you, it could be sooner or later. The thing with him is that he keeps things bottled up to himself. It’s hard and it’s tiring and the moment he feels safe with you, the dam breaks and he starts to reveal things about himself.

P = Patience (How easily angered are they?)

It’s definitely hard to annoy Howie and even harder to provoke him. He has the patience of a saint and unless something is very wrong, you can always find him just chillin lol.

Q = Quizzes (How much would they remember about you? Do they remember every little detail you mention in passing, or do they kind of forget everything?)

He’s quite sentimental so he definitely remembers your relationship milestones. He remembers a lot of small things about you; like how you like your cereal and your best friend’s name from high school. Some of the details can be fuzzy at times but he tries!

R = Remember (What is their favorite moment in your relationship?)

Canonically: The moment you said yes when he asked to be your boyfriend at Luca’s "sister's wedding".

Headcanon: The time you both visited his family in Chicago for the holidays. You were walking home from dinner when the snowfall turned into a snowstorm. It was terribly cold and windy but you both kept on laughing at the situation and you looked so gorgeous with snow stuck to your hair under the waning streetlight that he didn’t even care that he's freezing his butt off.

S = Security (How protective are they? How would they protect you? How would they like to be protected?)

Isn’t too protective in the traditional sense because he knows you can take care of yourself. More protective of how you feel because of his words and actions so he’s careful in what he says and how he says them because he doesn’t want to hurt your feelings. Highkey loves to be protected tho. Thinks it's kinda hot.

T = Try (How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)

Puts a lot of effort in his career, obviously. Howie is always so passionate and ambitious when it comes to being a top actor. Relationship-wise, he’s a simp. Dates are mostly casual with him but he puts extra time and effort in choosing or making gifts. All the extra and expensive bits goes into your anniversary dates.

U = Ugly (What would be some bad habits of theirs?)

A lot of times, he leaves his wet, sweaty workout shirts at the corner of the room and somehow always forgets no matter how many times you’ve scolded him. Sometimes doesn’t close or tie snack packages properly so when it's your turn to eat them, they’re often stale. A terrible snorer when he’s had a long day on set.

V = Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?)

Quite concerned. He likes to highlight the nice parts of his body through the clothes he choose to wear and tries to follow a healthy diet in general. He worked hard for his body and as much as embarrassing as it is to admit, he loves to show off and be admired for it (especially by you).

W = Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?)

A strong believer that every person is complete and whole on their own. He believes that every person is their own and just because you love someone, it doesn't mean that your life must revolve around that person. Even so, he is a romantic. So even if he knows that he's complete without you, he does prefer to have you by his side.

X = Xtra (A random headcanon for them.)

He can play the piano really well. Aside from dance lessons, his parents put aside a lot of money to sign him up for piano classes when he was younger. Now, he plays them whenever he’s deep in thought and it’s always relaxing to hear him play.

Y = Yuck (What are some things they wouldn’t like, either in general or in a partner?)

In general, Howie doesn’t like broccoli. Keep those away from him. Please. When it comes to partners, Howie stays away from people who make him feel less. Basically people who put him down for being who he is and liking the things he likes. Narcissists, if you will.

Z = Zzz (What is a sleep habits of theirs?)

He’s a snuggler and he nuzzles into your side a lot when he sleeps. Whether you get too warm is your problem because this dude is Strong™ and won’t let you push him aside that easily. And, God, I hate to say this but he’s definitely a snorer. Not all the time but when he’s really tired.... let’s just say you won’t be getting a decent sleep.

[saudade-mayari]

💜 Happy 500 Luna! Can I please have Kakashi x Reader + some night bliss scenario? You know, that moment when you both can't sleep at 3am, and it's just... Peaceful and safe (sfw or not - I'll leave it to you 😌). I'm so proud of you, you're an amazing author, you deserve all love. I hope we'll see your 1k milestone soon ♥️

3am Midnight Bliss

♡ Warnings: Kakashi x fem!reader, domestic fluffs, suggestive content and nsfw on the last part, 18+ content, minors please dni

The nightfall’s calming and peaceful dim light shining across the windows of his apartment was hypnotizing, the moon was full and shown with a brilliance between the tall evergreens and slow rising of buildings in Konoha. It was all good, almost perfect if you could say so. The reconstruction of Konoha had come better than expected, his hard work of being the base pillar of the Land of Fire and ensuring that the village will enter a new state of technology was all worth it. His restless nights of meeting various investors, councilmen, and fellow Kages totally paid its price, truly a diligent man.

Your eyes opened wide by the sudden actions of Kakashi, the way he wrapped his arms around you is filled with longing and passion. It’s been a while since he actually stayed in his own house, been a while since both of you had laid each other down and talk about life. Indeed being the Hokage took all his time but you understand, he may not ‘love’ the responsibility of being the supreme leader of the Land of Fire but never did Kakashi once slacked off or put the village in a tight situation. He loves the village and the people and he’s willing to protect it at all cost. That’s one thing you are sure about. You wrapped your small arms around his body while your legs clinging to his hips, finally noticing you are also awake.

“Can’t sleep?” You muttered between his arms. Kakashi’s eyes somehow glittered in happiness, missing your touch and your voice whenever he’s out on serious Kage works. He gave out a not-so-tired nod then kissed your head while giving you another tight hug. You smiled between his arms, it felt peaceful. It’s not what you and Kakashi had grown up with. You are both 2-war veterans and seeing every corner of the world in a peaceful state is almost a dream for him.

“It’s so different now.” He said, stroking every strand of hair that covers your face. You smiled, both of you are thinking the same thoughts. It was almost unbelievable. You kissed his chest.

“It really is. It’s so calming.” You answered while looking at his face. Appreciating his little beauty mark, his well-defined jaw, his fair skin, eyes, the scarred cheek that made him look so perfect, and the classic silver hair of Kakashi. “It’s all thanks to Naruto and the rest. I haven’t even done anything as their Hokage.” He answered. This rarely happens, pillow talks weren’t usually on Kakashi’s master plans and schedules since he became the Hokage. He needed rest and you always ensure he’ll get enough strength for the next day. It’s the very least you could do for him.

“You’re a great Hokage, love. You did a lot for the village even before you’ve become the Hokage. Don’t downgrade yourself too much.”

Kakashi hugged you tighter. Once again smelling the flowery scent that he had always love. His calming complex, his home. “Really? I think you’re just flattering me.” You gave out a small chuckle on his response, clearly joking but you know how low his confidence had become ever since he took the title of Sixth Hokage.

“You established many things already. Many things wouldn’t be possible if it weren’t you sitting on the chair as Sixth Hokage.” You assured him but Kakashi gave out a sigh. Despite the peace, there were still many things bothering him. You’ve been his wife for almost 3 years now and every single sigh and flickers on his eyes are so obvious to what’s bothering him. He was even amazed at how much you were able to read him as he does.

“Kakashi love… Tell me. What’s bothering you”

“I wish we were born a little later, Obito and Rin wouldn’t have to go through such pain. I feel so guilty living this kind of peace when they’re not here. Anymore. I don’t even deserve this.”

You sat down, stared at those dark orbs now filled with sadness and regret. You cupped his face to force him to look at you. Obito and Rin. The memoirs that always tattoed in our hearts. The very reason why Kakashi had turned out to be a great man is because of the ideals they all shared as a team.

“Kakashi. Do you think they’re going to be happy seeing you like that? You don’t regret marrying me aren’t you?”

“No. Of course not! I love you.”

You smiled at him then kissed the tip of his nose. “Then let’s live for them okay? And besides… You gotta live for another buddy this time.”

Kakashi stood up, gave you a reassuring smile then held your shoulders, slightly shocked by your sudden remarks. Seeing him on his tank top while his mask freely hanging on his neck and those unruly silver locks made you chuckle are completely far from the broad man they see on an everyday basis. Yep, the Sixth Hokage.

“y/n- Are you-”

Answering with a nod, tears started building up in his dark orbs. The feeling of love. Marriage and parenthood. It was almost unbelievable for Kakashi. His grip on your shoulders gradually tightened and started looking up at the room’s ceiling, clearly trying to suppress his tears from completely falling.

“We’ve been trying right…When did you-... I-”

“Three months. Sakura disclosed this morning. I was about to announce later but I think today’s the right moment to say..”

Kakashi did not take his time already, in a matter of time your lips suddenly crushed to his. It was not lust, not the type of hunger you usually do. It was different. Gratitude and Happiness. Love and warmth. It was so emotional.

You wrapped his arms around his neck to pull him closer, both of you were once again laid down on the soft mattress of the bed, slightly making the thick comforter out of place. Your foreheads and the tip of your noses are pressing to each other. Both of your tears are now falling, feeling extremely euphoric and everything in between.

“I love you. Let’s live for them and for our kid Kakashi.”

And before he entered his tongue to yours, Kakashi rubbed your belly then goes back to kissing your cheeks with tears still falling. He’s going to be a father. The one that scared him the most but little did he know the excitement of forming a family with you would be this emotional.

“I love you too, thank you for everything y/n.”

Kakashi never took his time removing your clothes but it was still steady and slow. His moves were delicate and careful. He could smell your arousal. He knew that you’re turned on. He parted your folds only to find that you’re core is invitingly wet. He massaged it carefully, looking at you while your lips part from the moans around the four corners of the room.

“Kakashi… I need you…”

“My wife is so needy, as you wish love.”

He placed his shaft at your entrance and nudged its way in. You gave out a pleasuring gasped as you tried to adjust to his overwhelming length. Once he was completely inside you, Kakashi started thrusting slow and steadily. Your hips met his every thrust, making you raise your legs to circle around his waist. This only allowed him to move into your body much closer. Kakashi had kept kissing you to prevent you from screaming. He knew that he wouldn't last long. He increased the pace and when he couldn't hold back any longer, he gave out soft grunts and moans alongside his climax. Praising how much lucky he is to have you as his wife. Before closing your eyes Kakashi passionately kissed your lips then held your 3 month belly.

“I can’t believe we’re going to be family y/n. I’ll do my best to be the father our little baby deserves.”

“We will, love. I know it.”

Requests for 500 followers event status: CLOSED

Event Masterlist

[cathrrrine]

The Devil's In The Details

Originally from my AO3

SPN X MCU - Steve Rogers x Winchester!Reader

© Cover by Marveled.

Chapter 1 - Elevator Doors

“Well, I don’t think it works that way Tony.” You laughed, standing in front of the quinjet as you waited for the others to disembark.

“You owe me a favour, you know.” He scoffed playfully. “Maybe he’ll convince you.” His gaze shifted to a figure behind you.

“Who-“

“Mommy!” The little voice you recognised all too well surprised you. When you turned around to see the owner of the voice looking up to you with the biggest smile you’ve ever seen, you couldn’t help but reciprocate the act.

“Hey, bud!” You grinned, picking your little boy up from where he stood. You carried him on your hip, with your arms wrapped around him lovingly.

Tony smirked, patting you on the back in a friendly way and ruffling the little boy’s hair before he left to find Pepper, knowing you’ve forgotten all about your conversation with him earlier.

“Where’s your daddy?”

“He’s right here.” The man you loved walked just seconds after your son did. “Hey, mama.”

“Hey, Cap.” You leaned over to kiss him. You had just gotten home from a mission. It wasn’t unusual for you to be greeted by your small family almost immediately after you came back. It was the same for your boyfriend, Steve Rogers.

“How are you?” Steve asked, his blue eyes meeting yours.

“Fine. I’m unscratched if that’s what you’re asking. And the mission went well too.” You walked alongside him as you carried your son. The three of you made your way outside the hangar, Steve knowing you well enough to know you were on the hunt for some food.

“Did momma catch some bad guys today?” Your three year old son, James, asked. He wasn’t that exposed to what your job entailed, but you and Steve had give him a small idea of it. You figured he was too young to know that his parents were basically killers, so you resorted to telling him, quote and unquote, that you caught bad guys for a living. It wasn’t a lie, technically.

“Yes, my little pumpkin.” You kissed his nose. “Momma caught a lo-o-o-t of bad guys.” You said, dragging the word ‘lot’, which made him giggle.

Minutes later you were sat in the kitchen, munching on a cookie with a glass of iced tea in your hand as you watched Steve cook for you. He was more of the chef in your relationship, the last time you tried to make anything other than breakfast, it didn’t end so well. Ever since then, he made lunch and dinner while you handled breakfast. That is, whenever the both of you had time to sit down and eat together.

“There you go.” He set the plate down in front of you, a big goofy smile plastered across his face.

“Oh, Steve. This is why I love you.” You almost moaned at the sight of food in front of you, the delicious smell filling your nostrils and exciting your taste buds.

“Really? You love me for my cooking and not for my gorgeous blue eyes?” He mocked, “Or maybe my handsome face?”

“Nope. Just your cooking.” You said albeit a little distractedly as you chowed down on your meal.

“Damn. Not even my abs?”

“I guess I can make an exception.” You shrugged, playing along.

“Harsh. Did you hear that James? Your mom only loves daddy for my cooking.”

“But I love your cooking too daddy.” James looked to him innocently with wide eyes.

“Really?” Steve pretended to be shocked, putting a hand over his mouth. “Oh wow! Thank you James!“

It made both of them laugh, and your chest swelled with warmth and love just by looking at them. Not once have you taken this for granted, everyday you woke up praising whatever God that made it possible for you to live a life this great. Sure, it had it’s ups and downs, but with your family in front of you...everything in the world seemed right.

You would die for your son and for your boyfriend. Though the both of you had been living like a married couple, you weren’t actually one. You had the conversation with him, and he knew you weren’t ready for that kind of title yet. Even though it didn’t make sense, because you were committed to him and this life. You only had eyes for him and only him...but something about the word ‘marriage’ and ‘husband and wife’ opened up a pocket of fear inside of you.

But that didn’t matter, at least for now. The sound of Steve and James laughing and giggling like idiots brought you out of your thoughts.

Nothing could ruin how perfect this is right now, you thought.

But little did you know.

——

“Alright, let me hop in the shower and get changed into something less...nasty.” You said to Steve, motioning to your uniform catsuit.

“I wouldn’t say nasty is the right word for it.” He winked.

“Careful, Rogers. You could get me pregnant again with that look in the blink of an eye.”

“It’s not so bad. I wouldn’t mind another one, look at him, he’s so cute.” He cooed at the fast-asleep James.

“Don’t wake him up.” You whispered, reaching over to tuck the little boy’s hair out of his face.

The both of you were walking towards the elevator, with your son fast asleep in Steve’s arms. After you ate, you and Steve talked for a while as you loaded the dishes and cleaned the kitchen. Apparently, his giggle fit with his dad was enough to tire him out. Your little boy fell asleep in his chair before he made it to his bed.

“Miss L/N.” FRIDAY’s voice echoed through the room. You weren’t so scared it would wake James up, he was used to the A.I. Plus, he was a heavy sleeper.

“Yes, FRIDAY?”

“There two young men here to see you.”

You shared a look with Steve, confusion painted all over your faces.

“Who is it?” You asked her, but it was too late. Before she could answer, the elevator doors opened right in front of you and revealed the two people you’d least expect to see today, or ever for that matter.

“Y/N, are those your...” Steve trailed off, watching you as you made wordless eye contact with your long lost brothers.

“Sam. Dean.”

“Y/N. We need to talk to you.”

[montanababe7]

Wrote this last year: A post that I am writing ✍️ from pain to refreshing clarity and wholeness through Jesus: I might be 37 in natural years; but in reality, I’ve had to be an old soul all my life.

I know there are folks out there who have grown tired. Exhausted and irritated even of hearing me speaking about me going zero contact with the woman who birthed me, go ministries international, my high school experience, cross roads college, the list is endless.

I’ve faced more traumas, heartbreaks, heartaches 💔 than most people know.

I’ve come to the conclusion that I honestly don’t even care anymore. I’m done letting those painful moments define me. Define who I am.

I’m tired of being written off by those who don’t have the slightest clue of what it’s like to be in my shoes for even one day.

Most assume. That I don’t have a care in the world. That nothing ever bothers me. I have had to learn to turn my emotions on and off. some would say this is not healthy or a good thing. For me. It’s been survival.

I’m done crying about the fact that my birth mother f’ked up my life while growing up. I’m done grieving the fact that I can’t allow that woman to have any relationship with Mike and I’s, children.

I’m trying so hard to turn my 🧠 off and just let myself feel something for once other than pain.

I’m still grieving my brother Josh Farnam’s 💀 d e a t h. I miss him. So much.

I’m done hating my mom. Or the fact that she single-handedly ruined my wedding day. She didn’t allow me to attend my little sister Kelli’s bachelorette or even attend the one my sister

Had planned for me. Not to mention, she had a p I s s po o r. Seamstress desecrate the most perfect wedding dress. The sleeves that were sewn on were not even.

Lest I remind you. My b of a mother also told me that she was betting that my husband and I, wouldn’t last for more than six months after he and I, got married.

Or the fact that my birth mother and her friend sandy were cursing mike and I‘s marriage. She one of my sil in confidence that according yo her. that I was never supposed to get married, have children, or ever have a life of my own. That I was supposed to remain by her side and be her own personal s l a v e forever.

For those of who you have a healthy mother daughter relationship with your mother. Be grateful.

It’ll be 2024 soon. Starting now. I’m ready to live my life with joy instead of pain. I can’t go back and erase what happened to me when I was younger or as a newly married bride.

What I can do though. Is move forward with my best 🦶in front of me. Not looking back at the past.

Grateful my husband has been there for me. He and I, are

Both overcomer of

So much traumas and pain.

Michael Wolf 🐺. You are a champion. I want you to know that and see that. You’ve help me to withstand and accomplish so much. We’re both healing ❤️‍🩹. Little by little. Moment by moment. Day by day.

Mikey. Baby. I want you to know that I cherish you and that I love you. The love that I

Have for

You will always be here.

We’ve seen Jesus do more

Miracles

In our lifetime far more

Than we have ever dreamed of.

The best days are ahead of us. Not behind us.

I love you. I honor you. I champion you.

I might be spitfire and 💅 at times. I can have my 🦞 out a lot. But my. Heart 💜. That heart that has been through the 💍 of

🔥 is yours alone.

You brought me out of the shell I was in. My birth mother was not right about something.

I was a 🐚 of myself while growing up.

You helped me to really live. You gave me a reason for living and you do every single day.

You are the reason Mike-our girls and I, go on each day.

You give me

Strength. You might not see it. On every moment. But. I adore you. I have

The biggest crush on you. I mean. Come on. When you wink 😉 at me. Oh baby. It takes my frickin breath away.

Yup. You are amazing.

This post was a rant that turned into a sappy love note 📝 and letter 🗒️ to you.

You are my happy place. I love you so much. Thank you for always having my back. Thank you for who you are.

I love love love love you 😘 💕 🥰 😍 Mike so very much.

Love,

Your Wife.

Jess

Jessica Wolf

[eyoricka]

Movie and lyrics Promt

here is a list of prompts for Thomas I made based on movie quotes. I would love to write them, so feel free. You can ask for fluff, angst and now even smut, tho the smuts will be posted on my other account dedicated to them (@sluttyercobra ). If you have any ideas or have a specific scenario in my mind, feel free to tell me.

I'll write each prompt only once, and the ones already used will be highlighted.

Things I don't write : anything related to SA, pregnancy loss, abusive relationship. For the smuts I won't write anything with underage partner, non-consensual sex, age regression.

I also added a list of prompt based on lyrics (also for Thomas). Those are prompts that have posted in August but flopped so I am hoping to get request this time around ☺️

Movie Quotes

A) “Why did you call me at the office today?”

“I had nothing to do. I wanted to hear your voice.”

In the mood for love

B) “I can’t remember anything without you”

Eternal sunshine of the spotless mind

C) „ I want you.”

“I want you too.”

“Forever.”

“Forever. There is no life without you.“

Mister nobody

D) “Do you ever miss your regular life?”

Dallas buyer club

E) „You two had a nice friendship.”

“Yeah...”

Call Me By Your Name

F) “I love your hands, they are so gentle.”

Two lovers

G) “ I just don't think I have what you're looking for.”

“I think you do, actually.”

“What makes you think so?”

“That smile for one thing.”

Velvet Goldmine

H) „What, you really believe that? That everything's fated?”

Before sunset

I) “Truth is: I’m just an idiot who has been extravagantly unlucky”

3000 years of longing

J) “I'm tired. I don't want to hurt anymore and for some reason when I'm with you, it just hurts the both of us.”

Everything, everywhere, all at once

K) „ I've always loved you.”

“And I have always known.”

Cleopatra

L) " Can you dance?"

"A little. The cha-cha-cha."

Mamma Roma

M) “See me. See me now”

Dracula

N) “You are not the man I know”

Annette

O) „ Confucius said, "Marriage is a bottomless pit of sorrow that makes you forget who you are."”

„ He did not.”

Palm Springs

P) “You shouldn't treat me like a dog! You were just amusing yourself.”

Maurice

Q) „ What are you thinking?”

„ I'm thinking how happy I am.”

The Unbearable Lightness of Being

R) „ It's not meant to hurt you.”

„ It does.”

Out of Africa

S) “I tried.”

“And the more you tried, the more I wanted you.”

Interview with a vampire

T) “I loved her so. And she knew what I did. She knew all the fucking stupid things I'd done. But the love... was stronger than anything you can think of. “

Magnolia

Lyrics:

1) You can't read my mind, so read my lips

2) You got what you been asking for

3) Bet I know what you're up to

4 )You just pretend there isn't a problem

5) I wish I could believe you'd never wrong me

6) I got kinda drunk and told her that I liked her

7) Say the word, your wish is my command

8) I think I'm falling and there's nothing I can do

9) I miss seeing the red on your face when I made you blush

10) I can't do this alone

11) Baby if you let me I won’t hesitate

12) I've never met anyone / Quite like you before

13) It was good what we did yesterday

14) However far away I will always love you

15) I can't decide / If I love you more at morning / Or I love you more at night

16) I wish I weren’t single now

17) Your eyes told me, "Girl, come ride me"

18) I didn't know that you were lonely

19) What have I gotta do to make you love me?

20) No teasing, you waited long enough

[i-am-distressed]

RIDE ALONG: Part 1

Prologue-Part 2

Warnings: none

You thanked the officer that held the door open for you, nodding to one you recognized as ‘Nanami’ as you made your way to your destination, Captain Yaga’s office. When you committed the misdemeanor, you were 3 days away from starting your first day as a rookie for the Tokyo Metropolitan Police Department. When you punched your ex, a few of the higher ups deemed your actions as ‘inappropriate’ and ‘out of line’, and they put your admission into the unit on ‘pause’ while they figured out what to do with you, but they weren’t the ones who decided what would happen to you.

It was the man who would hopefully be your new boss, Masamichi Yaga. The Chief, who apparently trained Yaga first hand, decided whatever he decides will be best, so this is your one shot to get this right. The other new recruits were starting today, so they put you on a ‘3 day probation to think about what you did’. You walked up the flight of stairs, letting your eyes wander as you did. The station was in nice condition. It had been remodeled a few years ago, so it was really sleek and new looking. It had an open concept layout, and most every room had plenty of windows in it, keeping the station open and light. It was much different from the 30+ year old academy you had spent that past 5 months training in, where every time you stepped into daylight your eyes spent a good 5 minutes adjusting to seeing an adequate amount of light. Already, this was a promising change, you just needed to not screw this up any worse than you already did.

You got to the top of the stairs and proceeded down the hallway the dispatcher you ran into had directed you to, Miwa? She was nice, much better than the other 2 girls who were sitting at their desks throwing balled up pieces of paper into a far off trash can. Walking down the hallway you found the second floor was much more closed off and professional than the first. It had more closed doors and private offices, not surprising since you saw a few doors with ‘Sergeant’ and ‘Lieutenant’ on them. You got to the end and stopped when you found the door that had ‘Captain Masamichi Yaga’.

You stopped taking a deep breath before you squared your shoulders and knocked. Just before you did, you heard the captain talking to someone, you didn’t recognize the voice, but it was clear it belonged to a man. “Come in.” You turned the knob before stepping in the door. “Go ahead and close the door, please have a seat.” Yaga motioned over to the second chair he had sitting in front of his desk, diagonal to the chair the unknown man was sitting in. You nodded as you closed the door, making your way to sit in the chair, keeping a professional posture and a steadfast expression.

“I don’t believe either of you have met before, no?” You looked over at the man. He had pinkish hair with a dark undercut, his eyes were dark red and sharp, even with how lazy his gaze seemed, it was intense. You could feel his eyes wandering you, not in a creepy perverted way, but in a scrutinizing judging way. And to be honest, you couldn’t tell which one would tick you off more. Beyond having hair that was definitely too long to be within regulation, he was also covered in tattoos. Maybe he was a C.I? “Never seen her in my life, can I go?”

Your eyebrow raised as you turned back to look at the captain, who had an almost visible tick mark appearing on his forehead. “No.” Sighing the man leaned back in the chair, crossing his notably muscular arms over his chest. You couldn’t tell since he was sitting down, but you guessed he was in the 6’0 range, probably taller. He was very fit, that much was for sure. And he definitely was no professional, that much was also for sure. Whereas you came in wearing a very nicely fitting pair of slacks and a silk button up, he came in wearing a tight white t-shirt and dark wash jeans, he was wearing what looked like a black flannel over his shirt, it being left open and the sleeves rolled up. It definitely didn’t meet the uniform standards, but it didn’t exactly look bad either.

Yaga cleared his throat and you directed your attention back to him. “I’m sure you’re aware of the possible consequences of your actions, yes? Your record shows good grades, good conduct, and overall a spotless record. Nevertheless, what you did could get you in serious trouble a few years down the line, you’re lucky he didn’t decide to press any charges. I should tell you to go find another career, since it’s clear you don’t process emotions well.” You looked down at that, your arms had crossed over your chest and you held your tongue, he had a point.

“But, My wife happened to be there, and when I confided in her on what to do about the situation, she told me if I treasure my marriage I should show you some mercy. Our daughter was cheated on, so I can’t say I hate what you did. In light of that, a punishment is still in order,” He paused to lean on his elbows, gaze serious, and honestly intimidating as he stayed quiet for a moment.

"For the next 3 months, You, Y/n L/n will be doing a sort of probationary trial with this man sitting in front of me." The man's head shot up, his crimson eyes wide open as his face contorted into a scowl. "Yeah, no, she won't be. I don't take passengers." Yaga sat up, his glasses casting a menacing gleam, "If you'd like to keep your job, Corporal, you will be." The ‘corporal’ in question ‘tsk’d’ before sinking back into the leather chair, leg crossing lazily over the other as his hand gripped his bicep. He was muscular alright…

”Ms. L/n, this is Corporal Ryomen Sukuna, he’s just recently been taken off of suspension and is in a probationary period of his own. If at the end of these 3 months the two of you are deemed fit for duty, you will proceed on with your careers with no problem.” You looked over at the man, his red eyes finding your e/c ones as he raised an eyebrow, your own narrowing slightly at him before you smartly returned your gaze towards Yaga. “Do I make myself clear?” You both responded with ‘yes sir’ and he dismissed you.

You both stood from the chairs, him grabbing the badge that was slid over the desk while you made your way to the door. “Your first day is tomorrow, don’t be late,” Yaga turned to Sukuna, “I hope you understand, it doesn’t matter how good of a cop you are, this is your last chance, mess this up and you're done. Please cooperate.” Your eyebrows raised at that before you felt yourself cringe, great, the ‘probation officer’ they assigned you was some kind of delinquent? You opened the door and stepped out, Sukuna passing by you without a word, going his own way as you sighed, shutting the door and making your way back out of the station.

On your way to the front desk to sign out, you heard your name being called. “HEY! Y/N!” You stopped and turned, finding two of the new recruits who had graduated with you, Yuji Itadori and Megumi Fushiguro. They were nice, and good at what they did, so you were happy when you heard they’d be going to the same unit as you. You watched as Fushiguro smacked Itadori upside the head, “We’re inside, idiot.”

Your lip tugged up at that, watching as Itadori rubbed his head with a pout before turning to you, giving you one of his smiles. “Anyway, what did the Captain say? Are you gonna be able to continue with us?” You nodded as a small smile made its way to your face, “With conditions, yes.” Fushiguro nodded as Itadori gave you a thumbs up and ‘nice!’, “You’re lucky you didn’t get cut, the higher ups can be really cut throat when they want to be, i’d watch my back.” You nodded at Fushiguro, remembering the stories your dad had told you about people being let go for trivial things, although back then it was mostly family politics.

Fushiguro was from the Zen’in family, who was known for being exemplary cops, and had a strong presence in the station. From what you knew, there were at least 5 of them in this unit alone. “I will, they’re letting me join, but for 3 months i’ll be doing a probationary trial with one of the corporals.” Fushiguro nodded at that, Itadori’s eyes lighting up, “Which one did you get? We get assigned our T.O’s (training officers) tomorrow.” You felt your eye twitch as you thought back to the disrespectful and presumably problematic individual you had just met.

“Ryomen Sukuna. From what I know he just got back from suspension, so this is a punishment for him too.” Your eyes narrowed in confusion when Itadori’s widened in shock, “wAIT!? Does he have hair like mine?” You nodded, “Tattoos??” You nodded again, “Really bad attitude and terrible social skills-” “I think she gets it, what’s your point Itadori?” You almost laughed at how tired Fushiguro looked, despite being friends all throughout high school, and going to the academy together.

“Dude...her probation officer is my cousin Ryomen.” You watched as Fushiguro’s eyes now widened, his lips fighting a smile as he turned around, grabbing the collar of Itadori’s uniform as he dragged him off with a wave, “Good luck then, you’re gonna need it!” Your mouth opened to reply before you decided against it, just shaking your head and finally making your way to the front desk. ‘Ryomen Sukuna...I’ll ask dad about him later, I swear i’ve heard it before..’

**20 minutes ago in Yaga’s office before you arrived**

“Corporal, please have a seat.” Sukuna walked in, sitting down on the chair and bringing his elbows up on the arm rests, hands clasping together in front of his mouth. Sukuna had been on a 2 month suspension after yet another misdemeanor. The only reason he hasn’t been fired is because he’s truly good at what he does, and the department really doesn’t want to let him go but…”You’re aware of how we handle discipline in this department. So tell me how it is you’ve been dealt 7 out of the 8 disciplinary actions and you still have yet to change?”

The department had a sort of system for disciplining it’s cops. 1. A verbal warning (which Sukuna had ignored), 2. A written warning (Sukuna had thrown away), 3. Performance Improvement Plan (He had on multiple occasions ditched his supervising adviser), 4. Temporary Pay cut (He practically lived at the station, it didn’t phase him much), 5. Loss of privileges (see #4), 6. Suspension (recently completed), 7. Demotion (...up until 2 months ago it was Sergeant Ryomen Sukuna…) and 8. Termination. He could handle everything else but...termination meant he was done, and he was anything but.

“I told you captain, it’s not me who needs to change, the departments way too stuck up.” Yaga took a breath before he sighed, leaning back in his swivel chair, “I know the higher ups don’t always act accordingly, but they’re still your higher ups, and I can only defend your job beyond so many offenses.” Sukuna glared at the ground as his arms crossed against his broad chest. *Knock knock* “Come in”

TAGLIST: @alohablue 💙

[cherienymphe]

Protect & Serve III (Steve Rogers x Reader)

WARNINGS: Cop!Steve, mentions of abuse, violence, STALKING, HARASSMENT, eventual KIDNAPPING/NON-CON

IF ANY OF THIS OFFENDS YOU, PLEASE DNI

➥ {page breaks done by @whimsicalrogers}

summary:  escaping an ugly past, you have no choice but to return home. While much has remained the same, Officer Rogers is a new addition who has won over the hearts of the town in your absence. And no one believes you when you start to see him for who he really is

~

The man behind the counter welcomed you with a warm smile as you approached. Maybe he could sense your uneasiness as you hesitantly placed your hands on the counter, looking at him with a nervous smile.

“Hi,” you quietly greeted. “Um… I need a gun.”

The brunette chuckled, blue eyes filled with mirth as he eyed you.

“No kidding,” he replied, gesturing around to the rest of the gun and hunting and supplies store.

“Right,” you chuckled. “I just… I need something small and easy to handle.”

You bit your lip, and his face slowly grew solemn as he ran his eyes over you.

“You don’t look like a hunting kind of gal,” he quietly insinuated.

You shook your head.

“No.”

He nodded in understanding before inhaling as he straightened, turning to eye the wall behind him. He paced, eyes roaming over the assortment of guns, and you took the time to look around. Never in your life did you imagine yourself in a place like this, but you were tired of being a sitting duck in someone else’s twisted games. You’d been through that once already…

“Here…”

You turned, eyes falling to the small gun in his hand as he neared the counter again. It was small enough to throw into your purse or hide in your car, whenever you got a license, and it looked easy enough to operate. It was perfect.

“I want this one,” you told him.

“Figured you would. It’s a Ruger LC9. It’s a 9mm caliber semi-automatic. Super simple to operate and will still get the job done,” he murmured.

He showed you how to load it, turning the magazine over and going over its features. You nodded as you followed along and grabbed your wallet without hesitation. He eyed you again as he took your cash.

“You talk to the police?”

“For what?” you wondered.

“For whatever’s got a girl like you buying a gun on a Monday morning,” he explained.

You sighed.

“Yeah, I’ve talked to them, but since no crime has been committed, there isn’t much they can do. I refuse to just sit around and wait for someone to hurt me. I’m done with that,” you told him.

He nodded and stuck his hand out.

“The name’s Clint. If you have any questions or…need to come back here, you know how to find me.”

You shook his hand and threw him a grateful smile.

“Thanks.”

The weapon felt so heavy in your purse, and even though the safety was on, you were careful in placing the bag in your car. The ride home was spent stewing over your thoughts. There was too much that you had to consider, and instead of spending the rest of the summer making lesson plans for when school started back, you were worrying about some stranger stalking your house at night.

Here you were doing the cops’ job for them.

That thought drew your mind to Officer Rogers, and you clenched your jaw. There was a time when you gave people the benefit of the doubt, but after your marriage, you couldn’t afford to do that anymore. How glad you were to be wary of the blond cop from the beginning.

His behavior had officially crossed questionable and dove straight into terrifying. You feared to imagine what would have happened had you accepted his proposal for dinner. You didn’t understand his behavior…not one bit. Was he punishing you for turning him down? Surely, that couldn’t be it. It seemed so…silly. Childish even.

Wanda had stated that just about every woman in town had been trying to lock down the man since he moved here. You could believe it. You’d have to be hard of seeing to deny how attractive he was, and coupled with his profession, you could definitely see why he was popular with the women in town. He was a seemingly kind man with the face of an angel, sworn to protect those in need. He was like something out of a cheesy romance novel.

You knew better though.

You’d been on the receiving end of his gaslighting tactics, his nicely veiled threats, and his wandering hands. The real kicker about his behavior though, was that he hadn’t done anything concrete enough to go to anyone with. None of what he did was objectively outright enough to report him with. Wanda had already asked you if you’d misunderstood his quip about your past abuse. You could just imagine anyone else’s face when you told them of how he brushed your waist and held your hand. ‘Oh, the horror!’ they’d say.

You hid your gun in your nightstand as soon as you got inside of your house. You hoped that you wouldn’t have to use it. You’d never been the type to resort to violence, but your ex-husband had changed all of that. If the cops wouldn’t do their job and protect you, without an incentive, then you’d do it yourself.

Hours later, you did just that.

You were half asleep anyway, having been going in and out of consciousness all night. The noise had come from the front of your yard this time, and you peeled your eyes open, slowly blinking as you heard it again. You had swiftly flicked the switch on your lamp and slipped your hand into your drawer to grab the weapon you’d bought.

You licked your lips, slowly sitting up. You looked down, making sure that the safety was off just before exiting your room. It was quiet outside as you quietly crept downstairs. You felt silly, standing in your living room in your oversized t-shirt, both hands on this toy-sized gun. You glanced at all of the windows, and when you didn’t see anything, you crept into the kitchen.

The silence made you nervous because you knew he was still out there. You turned towards the window and didn’t see anyone through the curtain. You weren’t convinced though, and you remained still. Sure enough, a bulky silhouette came into view as they glided past the kitchen. With wide eyes, you raised your arms, the gunshot making your ears ring as glass shattered.

You watched as he clutched his arm before taking off, a deep grunt traveling through the broken window. Hurriedly, you ran after him, throwing the door open before sprinting outside. Your yard was empty, and you had your gun raised before you as you paced the yard, spinning around. It was quiet…empty of anyone else it seemed.

They were gone, but fortunately, you knew that you’d hit them. You were just about to lower your weapon when you had a thought. With wide eyes, you ran back into the house. You were quick in grabbing your phone from upstairs before sprinting back outside. You turned the flashlight on as you neared the grass just below your window.

There, before you, were a few spots of blood, and hope bloomed in your chest. You let out a chuckle, feeling confident for the first time in a while. You put the safety back on the gun and laid it on the kitchen counter as soon as you were back inside. You grabbed a paper towel, stepping back out into the cool night air. You were wiping up the blood with the napkin when red and blue flashes suddenly filled your vision.

You stood and turned, watching as a police cruiser parked along your curb. The cop who stepped out was familiar to you, but it wasn’t the last person you wanted to see. Bucky strode across your yard to approach you, a less than enthusiastic look on his face.

“We got a call about gunshots. They listed your residence as the source,” he said as soon as he was close enough.

Your lips parted, and you glanced away. The blue-eyed man sighed at that.

“Ms. Y/L/N,” he admonished.

“What other choice did I have? None of you can do anything until I get hurt, and why would I wait around for that? The state doesn’t require a license to keep one on my property. It was self-defense,” you defended.

He frowned at that, running his eyes over you, alarmed.

“What was self-defense?” he slowly questioned.

You shoved the napkin at him, and his eyes widened.

“I shot him…Officer Barnes. I know I did! I got him in the arm, and now you have his blood, his DNA! You can test it, see if there’s a match in the system-.”

“Woah, woah, woah,” he said, attempting to calm you down.

You hadn’t realized that you were talking so fast, and you apologized.

“Here,” you said, turning to walk into your house.

He followed you, watching as you put the bloody napkin into a Ziplock bag before handing it to him. He gingerly took it, eyeing it before heaving a sigh.

“Well…the evidence is pretty damning. We’ll test it as soon as possible,” he eventually said.

Sighing in relief, you nodded. You watched as he leaned against the wall, crossing his arms over his chest as he studied you. There was a twinkle in his blue eyes, and it struck you how much like Steve’s they were.

“Ms. Y/L/N…is there anyone who’d want to hurt you? Anyone at all?”

You opened your mouth to reply in the negative when you suddenly froze. Familiar blond hair and blue eyes came to mind, and you blinked, a realization falling over you.

“Killian,” you murmured as if just remembering him.

“Sorry?”

You shook your head, eyes meeting Bucky’s again.

“M-my ex-husband. He’s the only one I can think of…”

“I assume it ended badly?”

“That’s an understatement,” you scoffed. “He was advised by his lawyers to go through with the divorce when I filed. It wasn’t his choice, at all, but it was in his best interest.”

The other man simply stared at you.

“He wasn’t…a good man. Not at all. I wish I could say all of it was verbal and psychological, but I had no choice but to come clean when I landed in the hospital. It wasn’t looking good for him and refusing to go through with the divorce would make him look worse,” you explained.

Bucky sharply inhaled, nodding.

“I see…”

“I…can’t believe that I’d never considered him before. He has money, but I’d never thought he’d find me so quickly,” you murmured.

Bucky made his way to the door, and you followed.

“I’ll get this down to the station. You be careful with that gun,” he advised, and you nodded. “Have a good night.”

And for the first time in weeks, you did.

“You look well rested,” Wanda complimented, bringing your plate to you.

You returned her smile with a genuine one of your own.

“I feel well rested. Hopeful, actually,” you replied.

“That’s good! So I take it things are a lot better at your place, now?”

“They will be,” you cheerily said, digging into your food.

“I’m glad to hear it, and what great timing too. It seems like Steve might be out of commission for a few days,” she told you. “So, it won’t be him responding to any 911 calls.”

You blinked up at her. You couldn’t care less about the blond cop in any way, and the information actually filled you with relief, but your curiosity got the better of you.

“Why?”

“He was shot,” was her simple response.

However, it made you feel anything but simple. You almost dropped your fork as you eyed her, brows furrowing as your heart dropped to your stomach.

“…what?”

“Yeah, in the arm…”

It felt like someone took a knife to your chest.

“…the word is that he was involved in a hunting accident.”

You forced yourself to swallow, mind whirling.

“When?”

She hummed, thinking.

“The day before yesterday, I believe,” she answered.

You wanted to be relieved at that, that it wasn’t last night, but…it all seemed too coincidental. No…there was no way. The thought alone made you want to be sick.

“How…awful,” you whispered.

“I know,” she pouted. “I’m baking him a cake tonight. Figured I’d head up to his house to deliver it to him.”

You pressed your lips together, trying, and failing, to talk yourself out of what you were about to do. You knew that you were paranoid, you’d never deny that, but you owed it to yourself. If only to quell your fears. You had to see…

“Uh…when are you heading over?”

“Probably in the morning,” she said just before welcoming some customers in.

“Can I come with? I’d like to check in on him too…”

She looked at you with a sly smile, and you grimaced.

“Growing on you, is he?”

“Hardly,” you scoffed. “It’s just… He’s always entertaining my concerns, responding to every call I’ve made. I feel like the least I can do is check on him, you know?”

She nodded, buying your lie.

“That’s really sweet of you. I’ll swing by your house around 8,” she said. “He lives pretty far out, so it’ll take about 45 minutes to get there.”

You nodded, and she left to go deal with some customers.

You swallowed, appetite lost, and you pushed your plate away. Your paranoia was really getting the best of you because a part of you actually believed that the person you shot last night was Officer Rogers. It was the most outlandish thing to think. The man was an officer of the law, and even though he proved that he didn’t deserve that title, there was a pretty big gap in between some creepy touches and a full-blown stalker.

You knew how it would sound if you voiced your fears to Wanda. People hunted around here all the time, hunting cabins forever common. It was perfectly believable, but…it seemed too coincidental. Besides, you figured there was no harm in seeing for yourself just to put your fears to rest. However, a small voice in your head wondered what you would do if you didn’t put them to rest at all, but only increased them?

What if you only confirmed your suspicions?

This plagued you all throughout the night and well into the morning when Wanda pulled into your yard. You locked up your house and hurried to her car, goosebumps rising on your flesh from the cool early morning air.

“So how far does he live?” you asked as soon as you were in the car.

“Do you remember where Dr. Banner lived before he left town?”

You nodded.

“Past that,” she replied, and you blinked.

“Why so far out?” you wondered.

“Steve likes his privacy. Plus, he’s really a nature kind of guy. Homebody too. I know our town is no New York, but even it gets a bit too much for him sometimes,” she explained.

“Being secluded in a big house with Steve Rogers, out in the woods, sounds like something most women would be interested in. He definitely strikes me as the type to want kids and the whole nine, so why hasn’t he ever taken any offers? You said it yourself that he’s had plenty…”

You were beginning to realize that you didn’t know much about this man, at all. It seemed strange that someone like him hadn’t dated anyone in 6 years. You already knew that there was definitely something wrong with him, but could there be more? Like making you feel unsafe in your own home more?

“I don’t know,” she hummed. “He did have a short thing with Peggy when he first got here-.”

“Peggy? I could see that,” you said to yourself, wondering what had happened.

Wanda answered your unspoken question.

“Yeah, it didn’t last very long though,” she sighed. “She left as soon as it ended. I never did find out what happened exactly, but she was just gone one day. House emptied of everything, and her car was gone. I guess it ended pretty badly. Steve never talks about it.”

You frowned at that. You’d known Peggy growing up, and that didn’t seem like her. Unlike you, she was never the type to just take off. But so many years had passed. Steve came to town about 4 years after you left, and a lot could happen in 4 years. People could change, and you supposed that’s what had happened.

The rest of the car ride was filled with idle talk about things that had happened in the years. Wanda told you about her boyfriend, Vis. He’d move here about two years ago, and he apparently made her very happy. She’d been lonely ever since her brother Pietro had moved away not long after you did, and Vis apparently made her smile more.

Eventually the topic somehow came back to Steve...and Bucky and Sam.

“His name is James, but everyone calls him Bucky. Him and Sam were roommates in college and just remained that way ever since. They both moved down here about…4 years ago? They’re all like 3 peas in a pod, like brothers…”

Sam was Officer Wilson. You’d seen him in passing a few times, usually with Bucky. He seemed nice enough.

“I wouldn’t be surprised if one, or both, of them was up here already,” she said, taking a left into the trees.

The driveway was paved and long, curving every which way before it eventually straightened out. You realized that the car was going up an incline, and thick trees surrounded you on both sides. When Wanda said that he liked his privacy, she wasn’t exaggerating. The seclusion of it all could be considered peaceful if you ignored who lived here.

She pulled up in front of a nice two-story house, the light blue paint standing out amongst the dark trees. You had the small cake in one hand while you closed the car door with the other. You admired the scenery as you followed her. It was beautiful, there was no denying that, but the battered woman in you couldn’t help but to think how easy it would be to get away with anything. If you screamed, nobody would hear you.

You followed her around the side of the house towards the back deck, and with a start, you realized that the hill that the house sat on led down to a rather large lake. Fog hovered over the water in the early morning, and your lips parted at the sight, eyes running over the thick trees on the other side.

“Pretty, isn’t it?”

“Yeah,” you murmured.

“He had it built before he officially moved down here. I don’t blame him for spending all of his free time at home. Who’d want to leave this?”

She knocked on the backdoor, and your nerves spiked as you realized that you would soon be coming face to face with the erasure of your fears…or something that would only worsen them. It took a few minutes before you heard him approaching the door. A greeting was already on his lips when he opened it, but it died when his eyes landed on you.

“Wanda…and Ms. Y/L/N. Come on in,” he greeted, stepping back.

“Hey, Steve. I wanted to bring that cake by before I had to go to work,” she said with a smile.

You followed her inside and shuddered when your shoulder grazed Steve’s chest.

“Y/N wanted to check on you too, make sure you’re alright,” Wanda added.

You looked at him with a small smile, noticing the long-sleeved shirt he had on.

“It’s the least I can do after responding to all of my calls,” you told him.

He returned the smile, but it didn’t reach his eyes.

“I appreciate that,” he whispered. “You can just put it on the counter.”

He gestured to the kitchen, with his right arm you noted, and you followed his instruction. You could hear him and Wanda talking in the living room while you slid the plate on the granite countertop. You glanced around, noting how homey it looked. You weren’t sure why that surprised you.

“Rough night?” you heard Wanda ask him as soon as you reentered the living room

Your eyes followed as she gestured to the several empty beer cans on the tv stand. Steve chuckled, placing his right hand on his hip, the left hanging limply at his side.

“Hardly. Sam and Buck came by last night. We just got into a few beers, watching some game that was on,” he replied.

You licked your lips.

“How’s your arm? Wanda told me it was a hunting accident…”

His gaze met yours, and the corner of his lip quirked up into a small smirk. He gestured to his arm, his left one, and relief filled you as he spoke.

“Yeah, Sam and I got a little careless out there. It’s just a graze, but nothing to worry your pretty little head about,” he responded.

Wanda chuckled at that while you fought not to sneer. You were just thankful that you’d put your fears to bed. The man you’d shot last night, you’d gotten him in his right arm. Steve was injured in his left, and you allowed yourself to breathe now.

“Can I use your bathroom?” you suddenly asked him.

“Yeah, sure! Just down the hall there,” he told you, gesturing behind him.

You thanked him and walked past him, Wanda’s voice reaching your ears as she asked him something. You went for the first door on your right, hand on the handle, when you were startled by a presence.

You looked up as Steve placed his hand on the small of your back, eyes widening as he pushed you along. His fingers pressed into your waist, and you shrunk in on yourself, a frown covering your features at his close proximity.

“Not that one,” he quietly told you. “That’s the basement.”

Your eyes met his now, and you quickly looked away at the intensity there.

“This one’s the bathroom,” he continued, opening a door, and flicking on the light for you.

You murmured a quiet ‘thanks’, flinching when he squeezed your hip one last time before returning to the living room. Your jaw clenched. He may not have been a stalker, but he was still a creep.

“I... I don’t understand. How long does it take to test some blood?”

The policewoman before you pursed her lips, arms resting on her desk.

“It can take up to a few days-.”

“Which it has been.”

“Yes, but the sample has to be sent to a lab, and we have to wait for the results,” she explained. “I understand your concern…”

“Do you?” you mumbled.

She chuckled, green eyes sparkling with mirth.

“I do. Why do you think I have the job I have anyway? I like being able to protect myself and other people,” she told you. “There was a time when I wasn’t able to…”

You sighed, glancing around the busy station. It was empty of a certain blond cop, and you were happy.

“I’m sorry. You’re right. You’re also a woman, so there’s no doubt that you definitely understand what I’m feeling. I just…I have to know who this person is. I don’t feel safe in my own house.”

“I know,” she replied. “Steve talks about you a lot.”

Your heart skipped a beat at that, face falling.

“…he does?”

She hummed.

“He wishes that he could do more,” she said. “He worries about you. Of course, with this blood sample, I imagine he’ll be doing a lot more worrying. This is proof that someone is out there every night, messing with you.”

“Do you think this will be enough to convince your boss to let someone stakeout my house?”

She mulled it over, humming.

“You know what? It might be. I’ll definitely bring it up,” she replied, and hope bloomed within you.

You fidgeted in your seat, worrying your lip, and she frowned.

“Was there anything else you wanted to discuss?” she asked.

Her tone of voice told you that she knew you did, so you figured it was best to just come right out and say it.

“If you are able to get someone to watch my house at night…can it not be Officer Rogers?”

Her frown deepened, and she ran her eyes over you. She leaned in, a red strand grazing the side of her face as she studied.

“Now why would you request that?”

You didn’t feel like you had a valid reason to give her, not one that she’d believe anyway. Steve was a town favorite, so you had to come up with something that would make her listen to you.

“You and Officer Rogers are friends, right? You care about him?”

“Of course,” she said, urging you to continue.

“I know that he worries about me, and that’s why I think someone else should be assigned to this. If it gets approved, of course. I just worry that lines may start to blur…”

She straightened up at that.

“How do you mean?”

You let out a soft sigh.

“He did ask me to dinner a while back, and seeing as I only recently got divorced, I refused. I’m just not ready, and I know that he understands and has no problem waiting, but…”

You chuckled.

“He’s just so sweet. I still feel so bad about it, and I don’t want to make this any harder on him. Until I’m ready, I don’t want to give him the wrong idea. I think it’d be best for everyone if an objective pair of eyes were on this. Especially for his sake…”

She hummed, nodding in understanding.

“No, Ms. Y/L/N, that’s perfectly reasonable. I’m glad to hear that Steve is finally trying to get back into the dating pool though,” she said, standing, and you followed her lead. “It took him long enough.”

You simply threw her a smile.

“Well, thank you for listening to me, and please, call me as soon as those lab results come back.”

“I will,” she promised.

Your shoulders felt lighter as you stepped out of the police station. Soon, you could find out who was tormenting you and they’d be locked up. In addition, you wouldn’t have to deal with Steve for a while…or ever again. You could finally breathe again. Soon you’d have nothing at all to deal with aside from lesson plans, and bratty kids were nothing in comparison to this.

As you neared your yard, you realized, with disappointment, that you would be eating your words. A sleek black car was parked on the curb, and it took a minute for you to realize that it belonged to Steve. You’d just seen him a few days ago, so you were unsure why he was paying you a visit. Apprehension filled you as you parked.

He was already out of his car and slowly making his way towards you when you stepped out of your own. You sent him a tense smile, standing beside your driver’s door as you eyed him.

“Ms. Y/L/N,” he greeted.

“Officer Rogers.”

“I came by to thank you for the cake,” he told you.

“Oh,” you said with a frown, shaking your head. “There’s no need. Wanda made it. I just carried it in the house.”

You brushed past him, nearing your house, and you could hear him following.

“Still. It was very thoughtful of you to come by and check on me. Especially considering the night you had before…”

You paused and turned to look at him, brows furrowed. He had one foot on your steps while you stood on the porch, neat blond hair pushed away from his face.

“…sorry?”

“Bucky. He told me about what happened,” he explained.

“Ah,” you softly said.

You shouldn’t have been surprised. Wanda did say they were like brothers, after all.

“I confess that’s partially why I’m here. I wanted to see how you were fairing. That must have been terrifying for you,” he admitted, blue eyes inquiring as they drank you in.

You glanced down.

“Yeah…it was, but…I didn’t have much of a choice,” you said, looking at him. “I know you all are just doing your job, and I suppose I can’t blame you for that, but… I couldn’t just sit around and wait for someone to hurt me.”

He hummed, eyeing you.

“So do you know who it is?”

You shook your head.

“No, but I did get some of his blood. I talked to Officer Romanoff today, and she said that the lab results should be in any day, now,” you repeated what she had told you.

He nodded, making his way onto your porch now, and you stumbled back.

“Look, if you need-.”

“Officer Rogers,” you boldly interrupted, giving him pause.

His blue eyes were focused entirely on you as you swallowed, determined to put an end to this.

“Um… I have something to say…”

He straightened up, crossing his arms over his chest as he stared you down, waiting for you to continue. Your tongue darted out to swipe over your bottom lip, and you took a deep breath.

“I’ve always tried to give people the benefit of the doubt. Always, but…since my ex-husband, I don’t think I can really afford to do that anymore. For my own sake…”

Steve’s eyes had darkened, and you fought to hold his gaze.

“Your behavior makes me uncomfortable…and I want to say that perhaps you aren’t aware of it, but I don’t believe that. I think you know how you make me feel.”

You watched as he looked down his nose at you, jaw clenching and eyes hard, and you forced yourself to continue.

“If I offended you…or hurt you when I turned you down, that wasn’t my intention. Believe me, that was the farthest thing from my mind, and I don’t appreciate you acting so inappropriately towards me for it.”

His chest heaved with his deep breath, and you watched the way his cheek poked out, probably from his tongue. Satisfied with yourself, you took a step back.

“That’s all I had to say,” you finished, turning to go inside.

“Ms. Y/L/N, wait,” he finally spoke, reaching for your arm.

“Officer Rogers, please! I-.”

Your words were cut off by his loud grunt, pain lacing his tone. You had reached out to push him away, not liking the way he’d grabbed you. You frowned, chest clenching, feeling like someone had dropped a bucket of ice water over you as you watched him clutch his arm…his right arm.

He had reached for your right arm with his right hand, and in retaliation, you’d turned and pushed your left hand against…his right arm. Realization hit you, and your eyes widened as you looked at him with different eyes. Eyes filled with a fear unlike any other you’d ever experienced.

You stumbled back, heart dropping into your stomach as his gaze finally met yours. He opened his mouth to speak, but you were already rushing inside, locking the door behind you just as his fist banged against it.

“No,” you whispered to yourself, shaking your head.

He didn’t knock again, and you moved to the side, watching his silhouette through the curtains. It was getting late, the setting sun casting shadows everywhere, and feeling like you were going to be sick, you noted that the shape looked awfully familiar. He just stood there for a painful amount of time before eventually taking a step back and leaving altogether.

You placed your hand on your couch, struggling to stand. It was no use. You collapsed to the floor on your knees, taking your table and lamp with you, the fragile décor shattering upon impact with the floor. You pressed your hand to your forehead, entire body trembling as you realized what your subconscious had always suspected.

Officer Steve Rogers was the one tormenting you every night.

 ~

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