this kitchen fucking sucks. i have actual grievances but most fucking importantly the cabinets are in just the right position that i cant sit on the counter anywhere
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Hey, time for another one of these!
Last time I asked how everyone thinks time works in-universe for blaseball, and while I was planning on asking about how siestas work, I think enough people answered that too that I'm gonna skip to my next thought which is:
What are Umpires?
Again, some thoughts to get the ball rolling. (And again, I am disappointed by the character limit on polls >:T)
Umpires are humans. The ability to incinerate (or alternate/curse/quest) does not change this, and may be tied to their position. Any change in eye color is not symbolic of other changes.
Umpires look human. Perhaps they were at some point. Perhaps they are possessed. Perhaps they willingly gave up their humanity to the blaseball gods in exchange for their power to Rule. Perhaps their family cashes their checks, as the thing living among them has no need for things other than Splort.
Umpires are monsters. If they were ever human, opening the book was enough to change that. They are horrible, clawing, hungry things, fire barely contained by a black mask of Law. Given their established love of Blood, I would argue this is a surprisingly textual angle.
Consider also: Perhaps, werewolf-style, these things are changed by the presence/absence/nature of an eclipse?
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caleb: don't worry, I won't be in your apartment too long
zeke: no, what? no, baby, stay. don't go. please. you can stay on my couch forever if you want. i promise my cat will love you and i won't even leave raw meat on the counter to get funky while your here please don't leave ಥ_ಥ
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