#or just vote on which one would be funnier

[lildoodlenoodle]

Ok North Carolina Stingray situation -

Some details for those who haven’t been briefed:

- female stingray in a tank with no male sting rays to be seen

- she has not been around male stingrays in 8+ years

- there are multiple male white spotted bamboo sharks in this tank

- the female stingray becomes pregnant AND supposedly has “mating bites” from one of the sharks

- in an extremely rare process female sting rays can impregnate themselves, ‘nature finds a way’

- she will give birth within the next month to possibly at least 4 pups

- Her name is Charlotte

[amemoryofwot]

Introducing our beautiful Aes Sedai ….

Esnaem Tumblragoran :)

(For her first name say it out loud, and I’ll take an extreme liberty making “agoran” a Malkieri suffix much like “nhald” is Taraboner and “ghan” is Cairhien)

And thank you to the 750 (!) people who voted! Let’s break it down!

We’ve already voted her into Malkieri heritage from our previous poll. From the top of this poll she was solidly voted into the Grey Ajah. The Ajahs corresponding to a lesser vote percentage were at a disadvantage due to the meta game of trying to vote her evil, but I’m happy she settled into a slightly less represented Ajah. She was Black for a good chunk of the time which lead to some of my favourite tags:

Age was a little trickier to assign, keeping in mind her Malkieri heritage needs her to be at least say, 50 to 60. So that vote percentage of a total lifespan doesn’t really make sense, so I think easiest thing is just to move that decimal place and make her 96 years old.

Personality wise she’s haughty about half again as much as she is serene which, yknow, fits.

Strength in the Power was a bit challenging as you all know that RJ’s wack leveling system puts Lanfear at level 1 and the highest, so MORE votes would make her weaker in this regard. Helpfully, the Thirteenth Repository has a power level chart that fits better here. If we round her up to Level 8, it makes her powerful enough to travel and puts her on par with such channellers as Verin, Alviarin, Alanna, Annoura, Meidani, and Seonid.

We did it everyone, we voted her to be TWENTY FIVE percent tits. Leading again to another favourite tag.

We voted her into the 6.3 percentile for height, which correlates to about 4’11 and a quarter (the quarter is very important) for the average woman. I looked up general weight range for this height and went with 45kg, which means she’s about 11kg of boobs so uh. Yeah. I tried looking up weight of breast size which I don’t think is even really a thing but the chart I found capped out at 1.5kg per H cup breast. Idk like I said before short and stacked. Fun fact the last screenshot I have of the early poll results show it took over 75 votes before anybody started voting for height which to me was even funnier than the bosom sweep.

She’s got about 5% vote for angreal so let’s give her five angreal of her very own, perhaps even some Malkieri artifacts she is preserving.

She has 8.5% vote for Warders, which is a challenge considering she’s Grey. To keep with the Ajah rules perhaps she only has one officially bonded Warder, but is caretaking a gaggle of aging Malkieri soldiers that are joked to be her Warders.

Most importantly, she has been voted about 21 pillowfriends. Another fun fact this is a higher number than confirmed pillowfriends and lesbians in WoT (I counted something like 18 from the wiki) so girl gets around.

And there you have her, Esnaem Tumblragoran, gilf Malkieri Sister of the Grey Ajah

[b4tasquad]

omg you should do a niko fic where they meet during a video and he couldn’t stop flirting , which confused everyone since he doesn’t do it much in videos

Authors note: a small one til I finally find the time to write something between spending time with my family on vacay🤷‍♀️😪

Warnings: cussing ig

…

“Ladies first.” Once again the guys are left shocked as Niko continued to treat you like you were a saint, unfairly put in a room with immature adults. Chunkz and Aj looked baffled at each other as the taller boy puts his hand around the back of your seat, and leans closer to whisper something in your ear. In their many years of knowing and working with Niko, they had never witnessed him be so… flirty.

When you had initially been invited to a beta squad video, you were thrilled. Not only did you love their group dynamic, but you were also a really big fan of their content. You weren’t unknown, if your millions of followers had a say in it, but being recognized and asked to collab by some of the biggest people on the internet was humbling.

While you were often calm, collected and could socialize very easily, today was a little different. In a room of all very famous men, there was no such thing as arriving relaxed. You were terrified, akin a little girl starting a new school. Upon meeting them though, your worry was quickly washed away. They were incredibly nice while introducing themselves and had a comforting thing about them that instantly made you feel better.

The video you were filming was for one of their most known series and today it was ‘Guess the Influencer’ seeing as you were an influencer, guessing who had the same lifestyle as you wouldn’t be too hard. Or you had thought.

Niko watched with a teasing smile as you wondered who to vote out. To begin with, Aj who was sitting on the other side of the table was supposed to vote someone out, but as he got ready, Niko interrupted him.

“Y/n should go first.” When Aj threw him a look of both disbelief and spite, Niko continued, and you guessed it was to redeem himself. “Since she’s a guest and all.”

Aj hadn’t looked too thrilled, but just shrugged, ultimately not putting up a fight like he usually would. But now, as everyone awaited an answer, you wished he’d gone before you.

“Fuck I don’t know who to pick.” At your words, all of them let out a laugh, Kenny’s obviously being the loudest. “Shit.”

Like little school boys, the guys continue to giggle over your choice of words. Hearing you cuss shouldn’t have had them this appalled, it had become kind of like your trademark in the industry after all, but seeing it live made it all the more funnier. Niko who still chose to stay close to you, leaned even closer to you.

You kinda figured that he was flirting with you along the way. If his gaze and words didn’t make it clear, his urge to stay close to you did. First, you had tried to be professional, but as his efforts became more frequent you couldn’t help but submerge yourself in the feeling of being wanted. You weren’t dumb enough to pass up an opportunity to flirt with Niko Omilana of all people.

“I’m voting contestant 2” If the guys heard him, Niko knew they’d never let him live it down. One thing was flirting with someone, but being so blinded by desire to cheat was something he’d never hear the end of. So with that knowledge, the Omilana made sure they couldn’t hear.

To them, it just looked like he was saying more flirty things. “Niko stop distracting, Y/n.”

Chunkz took a hold of Niko’s neck, pulling him back to sit straight. With a grin, he let himself be pulled, hands raising in surrender as a little chuckle escaped his mouth. “My bad.” He didn’t hold any remorse at all.

His stare was hot on you as they all waited for an answer. From the contestants to the beta squad, everyone was eager to get to the voting part, and were waiting for you to start.

What had possessed you to say it, you didn’t know. But as you looked at Niko after your words left your lips, his smirk and cocky expression showed everything his mouth didn’t tell.

“I vote contestant 2.”

[kimbapisnotsushi]

ojiro aran headcanons bc @luminouschaotic asked me if i had thoughts (which was. a while back) but i'm out of town for two weeks in a couple days and won't be on much so i wanted to get this done before then so LET'S GO!!

aran has like spidey-sense Chaos Instincts™️ honed by years of taking care of the miyas so much so that on his first day at inarizaki he feels a tingle down his spine and turns around just in time to catch akagi michinari falling out of a tree

aran, being the kind soul that he is, goes over to help. because if there's anything the miyas have taught him it's that if you don't intervene early on there WILL be even more severe consequences down the line than if you'd just helped them in the first place

it basically goes "hi i'm ojiro what do you need me to do and how much plausible deniability can i get from this"

don't worry akagi had just been get a paper airplane bc he might be a little shit but he's a little shit with morals who cares about the environment

he didn't get the airplane the branch broke before he could

akagi tells aran that he's going to try one more time and asks aran to stand under the tree so that aran can catch him if he falls again and aran's dreading the day akagi and the twins will finally meet

i actually think it WOULD be funny if kita and akagi had been childhood friends or something previously bc a) SOMEONE had to have been akagi's handle before high school and b) it just makes sense in my head

also i think a fundamental aspect of the shiratorizawa and inarizaki rivalry that we're overlooking is reon and aran bonding

like. they get it. they know what it's like. loving a place that does not always loves you back. having a home that does not always feel like a home. it can be hard, sometimes. but if there's one thing they agree on it's that their teams ALWAYS have their backs

(lev and liam my lovelies i have NOT forgotten about you)

also this just makes the whole "aran's irrational fear is tendou satori" a thousand times funnier

since it's established that aran references older pieces of media i like to think that means he sits down with like idk his grandparents probably and they watch all kinds of things together

sometimes the only other people who get aran's references are people who ALSO sit down and watch things with their grandparents (kuroo, kageyama, kita. . . )

the haikyuu club of good grandchildren . . .

anyways so that's how kita and aran become friends!!

oh my god . . . do you guys think his sister had those small kid puppy crushes on any of his friends . . . .

my vote is akagi or the miyas do you know how funny that would be

i think a bit that akagi does with aran is saying "oh my god this is just like [insert fictional media here]" when something (usually an Event™️ involving the miyas) happens and aran going "STOP SAYING THIS IS JUST LIKE [??] AND HELP ME"

when the third years graduate aran gives gin a gift and tells him not to open it until he gets home

when gin does open it he finds a booklet titled "how to survive the miyas: a comprehensive guide by ojiro aran" and it's at least a hundred pages long

the first page is an emergency contact list with the numbers of the miyas' parents, aran's parents, and every hospital/clinic within a fifteen-mile radius

definitely prefers a real newspaper to a digital one

i think the whole of the inarizaki third years are tech-averse tbh if you took them to one of those restaurants with the little robot servers with screens for faces they'd slow blink at it like really confused cats

this sucks especially for suna bc every time he gives his phone to one of them when he wants pictures of himself with someone or something they always come out blurry or too much exposure or some shit

i think aran and oomimi go hiking with each other on the weekends and are always pestering everyone else to go with them

they win when they promise everyone, yes, we can go out for brunch and boba after

(do the twins fall into a stream while trying to cross it? yes. did they still go to brunch afterwards, sopping wet? also yes. aran doesn't think he's ever laughed harder in his life.)

[lukkabloom]

Fun Facts abt the residents according to Ikevamp Radio (ヴァンなま) Part 1

Found a playlist of Ikevamp Radio that occurred multiple years ago so I decided to collect my findings about the residents in a list. I haven't seen anyone translate it or talk abt it so I decided to do it for a bit of fun. Anyways, here are episodes 1-3!!

Some quick things to note before:

Vincent/Aramaki Yoshihiko (Makki) is the MC, Sebas/Morishima Shuta (Morishi) is a guest (but he’s in every episode he might as well be the 2nd MC). They also have other people as guests in some episodes (other ikevamp VAs or others related to the game itself)

Episodes 1 & 2 occur before Ikevamp’s release

most of my findings are from a segment from the livestream where the residents (mainly Vincent and Sebas) talk to each other & ask each other questions about the lives while they spend some bonding time in the thermae. The segment's called "I love yu" which is a pun on "I love you" and yu (湯) which means "hot water" or "bath"

There are also other segments where the VAs draw based on a designated theme & the viewers vote on the best art (van Gogh's drawing section), and another one where the VAs read the summary of the game in their in-character voices (but the VAs interrupt and make it funnier & less romantic) called "Ikemen Vampire, a guidance for you" (I won't talk abt these sections much tho)

ALSO!! This is not a translation of the whole livestream, just bits and pieces of it. I don't have the time and energy to do that

Episode 1: feat. Leonardo's VA Tsuda Kenjiro

Question: Which historical figure/genius do you respect the most?

Napoleon: Oda Nobunaga

Mozart: Johann Sebastian Bach

Leonardo: Michelangelo (which I thought was interesting since real-life Leo and Michelangelo had some beef w each other)

Morishima (Sebas’s VA): Newton (bc of the apple & theory of universal gravitation), Edison

Tsuda (Leonardo’s VA): van Gogh

Aramaki (Vincent’s VA): Liu Bei, Zhao Yun (I think that's who he was talking abt? I'm not familiar much w/Chinese figures' names in jp---they're read differently in Eng)

The other VAs joke that Aramaki’s similar to Napo in the sense that they both admire soldiers/military commanders

Question: Favorite part of a woman’s body? (This sounds so wrong in both jp & eng)

Napoleon: from the neck to the shoulder, he's prob talking abt the shoulders to the neckline or vice versa（首から肩まで）

Mozart: voice (so he can understand what his partner’s thinking & feeling)

Leonardo: thighs (bc it’s soft & he likes lap pillows)

Tsuda said Leo’s a bit of a pampered/attention-seeking child (甘えん坊), and not an ore-sama (which he thought Leo would be), an unexpectedly cute reason considering how reliable Leo looks

Vincent gets a bit sad when he’s bathing alone

Leo can sing a song that he’s only heard once (as expected of a genius)

Sebas can be seen hanging the sheets outside from Vincent’s room

Leo’s unsatisfied that there’s only men in the mansion (this was before MC stumbled to the mansion)

Vincent doesn’t want women in the mansion bc he wouldn’t know how to act in front of them

Sebas thinks Leo is an expert in handling women, Leo is confused when he became one

Leo’s weak against Vincent’s pleas/suggestions (honestly who isn’t??)

Sebas thinks it’s impossible for a woman to stumble upon the mansion (foreshadowing)

Leo thinks that fate will play a trick on them, his mumbling confuses Vincent and Sebas (more foreshadowing)

Episode 2: feat. Jun, singer of Ikevamp theme song "Rouge"

Jun is a repairman who fixes things around the mansion… HE'S ALIVE IN THAT ERA???? (Idk if its canon)

He also sings “Rouge” while he works which means the song exists in the 20th century (again idk how much of this is canon)

Jun also sells milk in the mansion, acting as a different person as the repairman, although Sebas & Vincent are suspicious of him (he literally just enters the bath to sell milk to Vincent and Sebas lol)

Vincent and Sebas talk about MC, she has arrived @ the mansion

Vincent worries abt her since she is surrounded by vampires in an unfamiliar environment, but to Sebas, it looks like MC enjoys her life and is headstrong (aka Vincent is just nice to others, nothing new)

Vincent believes that Sebas is cool and can do anything, to which Sebas indirectly disagrees (he coughs)

Sebas is weak to Vincent’s innocent eyes (just like Leo from the previous episode, again, who isn't?)

Sebas breaks the 4th wall talking abt a popular romance game where you can fall in love w/vampire-turned historical figures

This is literally the beginning of how Sebas goes ooc (becomes weirder) throughout the series (is it even ooc if it’s basically approved by official??)

Sebas says that Theo is overprotective of Vincent, Vincent comments that he’s supposed to be the older one

they also introduce my fav segment (Can you tell me... your name?) where they have listeners vote on quotes they want the VAs to say, and they will say the line w/the listener’s names so it sounds like the VAs are speaking to them. Vincent's & the guest (if there is one) will have legit cool lines (like “(y/n), Don’t let go of me” or “(y/n), you’re the only one in my eyes”) but Sebas always has one funny line as one of his options (ex. “Hey, do you wanna have a takoyaki party?” or “Do you want to fry one more sanma?”) and every single time the weird line gets voted and ITS FUNNY AS HECK

Also in the same segment the viewers will sometimes submit funny names for the VAs (especially Sebas) to say & it adds to the laughs

Ex. for Sebas’s “Hey, do you wanna have a takoyaki party?” some viewers gave names of Anpanman characters (a children’s anime in Japan) so Sebas will literally say things like “Jam-ojisan, hey, do you wanna have a takoyaki party?”

There was also one whose name was Tako (octopus in japanese) so Sebas would say “Tako, do you wanna have a takoyaki party?” so he’s asking the octopus to have a takoyaki party where the octopus will be eaten (the irony as well as the dark underlying meaning behind it is very funny)

Also the way the other people are laughing while Sebas’s VA is trying to keep his cool is so hilarious

It’s predetermined and agreed upon the Ikevamp staff that Sebas (or Morishi) is willing to do/say weird things for the audience

This whole segment is a whole ride in and out of itself

Episode 3: feat. Leonardo’s VA Tsuda Kenjiro once again

Sebas once again breaks the 4th wall by referencing episode 1 of the show

Sebas teaches Leo the basics of manzai (a type of japanese comedy)

Leo says “Vannama” (the name of ikevamp radio) and “tendon” (the food and a manzai phrase)  in a weird accent further proving that he doesn’t understand Japanese (or maybe it's bc the two phrases are too specific idk)

Sebas tells Leo to ignore what he’s saying as he is saying metafictional expressions (メタ発言) basically how he is breaking the 4th wall, and Leo just accepts that as another one of Sebas’s quirks

Vincent comments that Leo’s very manly, Sebas further compliments him saying that Leo is a man amongst men

This episode has one of the funniest (imo) “Can you tell me… your name?” segments ever. Vincent and Leo’s VAs had amazing lines, but Sebas… oh gosh where do I even start. (ok Leo’s VA did say “Ushi (cow), wait for me by the bed,” and “Namamono (raw food), wait for me by the bed” & that was funny too but…)

One of the options for Sebas’s lines (and the one that was ultimately chosen to be said) was “Do you want to fry one more sanma (a type of seasonal fish eaten in fall)?” and the viewers got crazy with this one.

There were some legit names but most were for jokes, choosing names going along with the theme of fall foods and creatures (tuna, matsutake, karaage, grasshoppers, etc.)

There was “Akashiya, sanma mouipikki yaku?”(Akashiya, do you want to fry one more sanma?) which was the funniest one. Akashiya Sanma is a very famous Japanese comedian and it’s very genius of the viewer to connect the person with the food. I laughed straight for like 10 min when I first listened to this (I still laugh just remembering it. The double-entendre!!!)

Literally any episode with Tsuda is chaotic (this isn’t the last time where he shows up)

At the end of the episode, Vincent’s VA couldn’t stop laughing and messed up his lines multiple times (I don’t blame him everything is just so funny)

[youssefguedira]

luca marinelli character FIGHT: FINAL ROUND

it's been a fun ride. our final round is exactly what i expected it to be when this whole thing began, but truly where else could it have ended. it is, of course:

the RULES of this hypothetical fight are as follows:

weapons are BANNED.

re: nicky's immortality, within the constrains of the fight if primo managed to kill him then the fight would end and primo would win, even if nicky got better. essentially i want the immortality factor to have as little effect as possible (but he retains the 900 years of experience

outside help is not allowed. this is a one on one luca character only cage match.

take the above as guidelines only if you have a funnier hypothetical scenario but to keep this fair please vote based on who would win the fight. i think this is more evenly matched than one may think instinctually

ARGUMENTS can be found below the cut

i'll be honest these are difficult to divide into pro nicky vs pro primo arguments so here they are anyway and you can decide

"Nicky arguably wouldn't kill you unless you're a threat/have done something seriously bad, while Primo would probably kill you for cutting him off in traffic. He's killed people out of sheer annoyance and spite which is a thousand times more dangerous." - @goldheartedsky

"Nicky would not have needed two shots to stop Bertollini's car. Just saying." - @astrabear

"Primo junkies tend to dwell most on his physicality and malice (for good damn reason). But his cunning is what ultimately makes for winning ways. And yet, …how could he outmaneuver Nicky’s near millennia of sheer experience. That priestly powerhouse has seen it all. And yet, …Primo’s drive seems able to overrun every possible obstacle. Can he win on that white hot will? Or will another left hook like bicycles or phone phobias scupper his schemes? The only possible way to win this all is if he could manage to sway another Old Guardian to betrayal. To get the jump on Nicky (not that kind of jumping on) the surprise must come from within. No way Primo has that level of science or magic or whatever to sway one now. Nicky takes it and doesn't feel the least bit sad about it." - anon (really appreciate the level of thought put into this submission)

primo may strike first but nicky would retaliate and that would be the end of it

primo may have killed a lot of people but nicky has killed significantly more over the course of like 1000 years

and MY argument: i think primo could do it. i think primo could react with enough sheer speed and surprise factor that nicky would be caught off guard. but then again. this is nicolo di genova we're talking about here. ultimately i think they're fairly well matched under the above constraints. so.

[reddwarfpoll]

If, hypothetically, I were to do a bit poll* once the current episode poll finishes, would people be interested?

*The idea would be a poll where each match up consisted of two "bits" or sustained jokes (more than just one-liners; the board game scene in Samsara or the Deja Vu exchange in Future Echoes, for example) and people could vote for which they liked most/found funnier. These bits would be submitted by other people

[scaly-freaks]

pls dont laugh at me but...aegon and amara in a love island au but uk love island bc it was funnier

Why would I laugh? You're right. Our Love Island IS funnier. There's nothing like an Essex girl snapping gum as she points finger guns at a cheating man she met two hours ago and yells about how her heart is irretrievably broken.

That being said...of all the AUs anyone's ever given me, this might just be the most fitting for Aegon I've ever read. He literally belongs there. He's short, he's pretty, he's loud, and he jokes about his cock like he's being paid for it. And now I am laughing. Anon, you're a fucking genius. Oh god, he would make a frat bro group immediately once he got there.

Amara would NOT choose him btw. She would probably go for a guy who's twice his height and has a deep, sexy South London twang, whereas Aegon's a fully gruff Northern drawl. I see her being the villa darling tbh, she's sweet, she doesn't try to take anyone's man, and she's usually the first one asking other people how they're doing and sorta kinda becomes the villa therapist.

Aegon would be trying his HARDEST to win her, but it's like watching that gif of the big guy beating on oblivious Spongebob. Amara is skipping around all happy and How are you, Egg-on Toast? Are you well? and his throat gets all closed up and he's like trying to come up with a flirty line which usually happens easily but not with her. And camera catches it EVERY TIME. It becomes a running gag for the audience. When it comes time for them to vote who goes on a date, the votes pour in for Aegon to go on a date with Amara, and she's a little 'eh' but he's CHUFFED. Then the entire country basically watches him bomb the date because he can't get a proper word out, and when being genuine doesn't work, he goes back to fuckboy Aegon and completely turns her off.

They don't really interact after that, but then Casa Amor happens, and Amara's so happy to get her man back but he walks in with a different girl entirely. And it's SSSSOOOOOOOO. Everyone thought they were gonna win the show but apparently not. And she's just sitting there smiling, but her ears are red, and her eyes are a little glossy and she keeps saying she's fine, she's fine, and then doesn't even yell at the guy for humiliating her. She doesn't have any other connections in the villa either, so on the next fire pit gathering, she's probably going to be kicked out as the only one without a partner.

BUT -

Aegon happily ditches his girl on the next vote and says he wants to keep Amara in the villa instead. AHKFJDHKFJHKJFHKDJFHJKHFG. You can never keep a boyfailure down.

p.s. Did i just accidentally reveal I've watched too much Love Island in my time?

[whoblewboobear]

In honor of my two current hyperfixations bumping up against each other, I'm gonna make them kiss. So starbreaker!Reality tv au.

In my heart of hearts I know Jace would fucking hate playing Survivor but Porter would love it. Jace would thrive on big brother and so would Porter, but Porter falls into the category of houseguests I usually hate which makes this 10% funnier when they form a night one alliance and make it all the way to final 3 just for Porter to go rogue and betray Jace, taking Lucilla to final 2 because he knows her track record is non-existent compared to him being a comp beast the entire season. On top of JacePorter being a duo, they're in a showmance that they are awful at hiding. Up until Porter's betrayal, he and Jace are basically fighting for their lives in the end game because they're a deadly combo when it comes to competitions.

Jace went in fully intended to lay low until mid game when he starts to comp out. Porter absolutely hates his strategy because throwing a comp is sacrilegious to him. Jace does not care. His social game is immaculate and it has to be because most of the house fucking hates Porter and wants him gone like YESTERDAY and someone has to keep him in the house if he's not winning. On a week where Porter is in danger of being backdoored, Jace wins Head of household and keeps him safe. They're absolutely fucking every night in the HoH room to the point where people don't even bother trying to meet with Jace when he's up there. They find him in the backyard when he's smoking to really talk game with him.

His biggest public allies outside of Porter are Corsica and Sandra Lynn, but he his other biggest ally is Zara. He runs all his info back to her. They move like ghosts inside that house. Only the fans watching live feeds know their alliance exists at all bc they're even too discreet to make the edit until Zara wins HoH and turns the house on its head. She loves Jace to death but she knows if she doesn't take the shot at Porter this week, they won't have a shot at sitting in the final two together. Her social game is just that much better than Jace's and she does end up double crossing him to put him on the block next to Gilear as a pawn. They have a very public fight because Jace was NOT looped in because she knew he'd hate it and find a way to talk her out of it. This is the big turning point that lands him and Porter on the outs of the house. Porter wins the veto and pulls Jace down. Terpsichore goes up next to Gilear who gets voted out unanimously. Everyone is surprised he even made it this far lbr.

Porter's in a 6 person all guys alliance, he goes rogue and ropes in two girls to make it a solid 8 at some point thinking they'll steam roll the early game but it doesn't last long because Jawbone, Digby, Gorthalax, Bill, and Pok form something stronger on the side and let the 8 implode.

After the season is over, Jace and Porter 100% go on the amazing race and work surprising well together but they do fight the ENTIRE time.

[web-novel-polls]

Silliest Pre-Isekai Death BONUS Poll

(This poll will have no impact on the tournament. It's just for fun)

["Anti-Propaganda" that attacks other characters is NOT allowed. Please only give reasons to vote FOR a character.]

Reinhardt from The Demon Prince Goes to the Academy

Cause of Death: High blood pressure from reading mean comments on his novel(s) :(

Submission:

He was a writer and his novels were SO shitty. Every novel had shallow characters, tons of plot holes, and it ended up with "and then meteor hits and everyone dies". The readers were, simply put, NOT happy. They constantly wrote stuff like "what the hell is going on in author's head?!?" "the author can't even do basic story telling i could rewrite it even without trying"

Reinhardt saw these comments and... dropped dead on spot. That's right. He died of haterz.

When he saw own body, plopped dead on keyboard before a screen with displayed haters, there was a grim reaper. Turns out, he pissed off SO many people and to such level, it amassed him bad karma to such degree he was going to go to hell

That's right, shitty writing is a SIN and he was NOT going to see the pearly gates of heaven

To atone for the greatest sin of being pisspoor writer, instead of going to hell, he was given other option, to live as a character in one of his novels. But, as said before, they were Bad. None had a happy ending. So he only could choose a lesser evil.

Which, turned out to be a character in an initial setting, meaning right under the siege.

Shen Qingqiu/Shen Yuan from the Scum Villain’s Self-Saving System

Submission 1: He died from reading this long running webnovel that he would faithfully pay for legally, abd then rip apart every little thing about it he didnt like. It was bad. He read the last chapter, and was so angry either he ate spoiled yogurt when he wasnt looking and died of food poisoning, or choked to death on a bun. Later he would meet the author who also isekaied into it, and then said author would say that he was a super fan.

Submission 2: died from choking on a bao lmao loser (affectionate) and then tripped on some wires and extra-died by electrocuting himself

Submission 3: Okay it gets a bit complicated here but. There are a few versions of how it happened. In the first he is reading shitty Web novel and gets so fucking angry at the ending that he just spontaneously combusts and isekai's into the scum villain in the very novel he was flaming. In the second be chokes on a bao (while flaming the novel's ending) and dies, again isekai'ing into the scum villain. The only fact that makes the second death funnier is that the novel he is reading is a heterosexual harem collecting story that is slowly changed into gay fantasy romance through the events of SVSSS's plot, which makes the "choking on balls to death" thing so fucking much funnier

Shang Qinghua from The Scum Villain’s Self-Saving System

Submission: Got too excited roasting a hater which lead to him spilling his noodles which led to him electrocuting himself. All because he was making fun of mr.Peerless Cucumber's masochistic attachment to his novel

[dustofthedailylife]

currently brainrotting about college au Cyno, would love to hear your thoughts on this?

Aaah, I'm finally getting to this ask, sorry for taking a while sjkdjks (exams had me in a vice grip)!

College AU! Cyno

One word: student council president! (okay that's three words but we'll ignore that)

He was voted pretty much unanimously because he just exudes authority.

This also leads to a lot of people steering clear of him because they don't want to run into any trouble.

Most people think staying on his good side is for the best. Even if that means not talking to him at all.

To be fair, he does seem very intimidating and unapproachable.

But in reality, he is quite the opposite.

The cool kid who wears black hoodies and sneakers all the time. Maybe has some pins of his favorite bands on his backpack and always carries around a gym bag as well.

Although he isn't in any sports clubs. Because the gym bag does not contain sports clothes but... cards. Yes. Cards.

Because much to everyone's surprise he joined the TCG club and soon turned out to be some prodigy when it comes to card games.

His collection is massive!!

Thanks to him they even won the biggest nationwide TCG tournament raking in a big cash price for your college.

Students who've seen him play say he's like switched out - albeit still serious, but in a different way.

He considers only a couple of people very close friends and only around them he drops that almost intimidating aura.

His friends insist he often jokes around and is very laid-back in private - hard to imagine really, but everyone who is close to him says so.

On rare occasions, that side of his shows through in class as well. He cracks puns - much to the dismay of the professor who can only shake their head and sigh before moving on.

Due to his reputation you, too, were intimidated by him. Especially when he turned out to be your deskmate in your math course.

That was until he dropped "Why does the math book look so sad?"

You just shrugged and told him you have no clue, which he promptly answered with "Because it has so many problems."

Honestly, you didn't know whether to laugh or cry because of how bad the pun was.

Eventually, you started to grow closer to him and quickly learned that he is in fact as laid back as his friends say. Albeit a laid-back but still stern behavior.

Which in all honesty? It makes his jokes funnier because he presents them so dry and dead serious you can't help but wheeze.

[fountainpenguin]

Riddle watches New Wish - Post #7

"A Dinosaur in Dimmadelphia" - Full moon in the title card!

Hazel's parents are really engaged in having fun. I'm a little curious as to where this is going, since if we follow the OG lore, Hazel should lose Cosmo and Wanda once she's no longer miserable. I'm curious if they're going to push that direction or retire that bit of lore.

Also, C and W kind of snuck in under the radar and are retired otherwise, so Jorgen probably won't ride them as hard as he used to.

SLKDJF- It's a WHAT?

Obtuse Rubber Goose - 2001 B.C.

Of course she's more into the rocks.

/sweats at the billboard for Atlantis Condos even though it's painted in a mural. Cosmo... (Also I love the dinos by the water coolers in that image).

Man, this is a playground for both Cosmo AND Wanda's destructive histories!

I have feelings about the Fairlysaurus. I question nothing.

They're so cute.

The unfortunate thing about this show is that Whisper can tell me some scientists believe dinosaurs wore top hats and had electricity and unfortunately that's 100% possible in this world.

I like how Hazel's creature-hunting dad listens to Whispers Fred's podcast. That's gonna go well.

I like how Cosmo and Wanda can understand dinosaurs. She would be the type to understand them and wipe them out of existence anyway.

Confirmed 10k-year vacation through time!!

Hazel wishing "I wish people weren't afraid of dinosaurs" after bringing one to the future is one of the funniest things I've ever heard. Welp, that solves that.

sldkfj, Wanda proudly talking about the comet that wipes out dinosaur life as if she didn't personally launch that comet.

"If I can't send [the dinosaur] home, I'll do the next best thing: Get him a job!" - I changed my mind, that's even funnier. Hazel, why?

I love the background hills:

I like the implication that people are totally ready to accept the dinosaur as an actor because they're no longer afraid of him, so he can stroll in and not only are they unafraid, they also don't question it. Yeah, that sounds about right.

This vibe is very funny since Timmy usually tried keeping his wishes under wraps. Hazel's just been changing her surroundings and people play along.

I like that Whispers Fred and the museum guy had a bet about dinosaurs having electricity and the museum guy just sighs and pays it. Yeah, okay.

... Do I know that screaming man? Why does he sound familiar? Is he from "T.U.F.F. Puppy?" I know him... Is it Meerkat, my beloved?

-> I looked it up and Meerkat's VA is Daran Norris (Cosmo's VA). So... Yes, it was probably him using a Meerkat-adjacent voice, SKLSDJF.

Mystery mayor...

Is that #1 Dad in the crowd? Where is your baby?

SKLDFJS we're keeping the dinosaur. Okay.

"Fearless" time! - This title card has SPOT-ON Cosmo and Wanda in their old designs. Nice!

Did Hazel share a room with her brother, hence the bunk bed?

I like how Hazel's wardrobe is filled with identical outfits just like Timmy's closet used to be.

I like how the movies are also in 2D animation style.

Dev loves staring at Hazel and judging her in the background, doesn't he?

The kid on the voting poster reminds me of Imaginary Gary.

Note to self, include a trigger warning for this episode if I recommend it to anyone who doesn't like horror. It's no "Dark Harvest" or what-not, but they do a good job of making it creepy to kids, but... whoa.

I like the idea of Jasmine's fears coming to life as separate people outside her body, which is different than when Timmy wished he was fearless and became numb.

Hazel wishing for a Hazel stand-in to hold her place in class was smart. She and Chloe would be friends.

sldkjf, bug spray with the cockroach from "Wanda's Day Off" on it.

The plot about Jasmine having to be the one to face her fears is clever. Also, Hazel implied she has to avoid revealing magic, so it looks like she did get the basic rules explained (and they're still in play in this spin-off).

Wait, why is the girl who was reading "Shakespeare for Mimes" afraid of clowns?

I'm glad the crowns make metallic sounds when they fall since they're magnetic in the OG series.

OH SNAP- Hazel getting called out for "trying to make this friendship into what she had with her brother." That's rough, kid. Forcing Hazel to face her fears is a clever way to introduce her insecurities to the audience. I like it.

The list of champions on the school's wall goes up as far as 2019, and we can't be THAT far in the future since there aren't others.

I did worry where this plot was going, so I'm glad Hazel opted not to watch scary movies and instead pick something her friend wanted to do too :)

[most-tragic-character-tournament]

You know what would be really big for Nov 5th and a pogger move by you?? If you want to lay down the law and truly make this unforgettable, simply disqualify the poll itself. Neither character wins, neither character loses. They get to sit in the time out corner. The Fields of Asphodel. Blorbo purgatory. (Or you pair them together as one team bracket, which is ALSO hilarious and equivalent to forcing one huge "this is our get along shirt" on both fandoms.) You hold so much power right now as referee. Your next move will be joked about and referenced for years to come. We still talk about 2020. About Todoroki VS Miette after the fanart of Todoroki making multiple accounts to vote for Miette and the BNHA fandom was like "yeah you know what. so true." and there was peace in the lands. For such a historic poll, a simple win and lose and moving on is a little too plain, don't you think? it's forgettable, and plants a seed of bitterness as that one anon said. I'M definitely going to be telling my English teachers about this poll if I ever have to read Antigone. Especially with Nov 5th of the Destiel Putin Touya Reveal Election Dance Night of Supernatural S4 coming up. It can be a nice little prequel to it. In the way Ash Ketchum Becoming World Champion is a little sequel to it. Internet sandwich. I'm not the only one thinking about the Even More Hilarious Options here right?? Counting on you, OP to truly make this THE single most unexpected poll to date. Nobody would have done a dual disqualification OR the get-long-shirt option in response to this much feuding. You'd be one of a kind, truly, and preserving So Much Peace in fandom and irl. (Lowkey hoping for the 2nd option bc I think its even funnier, and that we everyone gets to see this through to the end.)

Okokokok so this got sent hours before I decided what to do and it got lost in the draft-sauce. Posting for anon to get it back!!! and also it’s just funny

[lordkingsmith]

As Autumn King is shaping more and more into a king haggard with the power of the unicorn when she’s a unicorn to back up his damage-aka going through people and relationships of every kind and experiences of every kind trying to find something to make him happy-and with a collection of victims to back that up; it would make sense, at least it does in my head, for Autumn King to have a son.

The prince, to keep with “this might become a video game” theme is both Prince Lir and The Red Bull for the continuation of last unicorn comparisons.

The king got himself a wife, a good fairy queen wife, and thus had a son. Realized they couldn’t make him happy and began just. Not being good dad. Eventually son becomes the first resident of the forest and does what his father asks. Namely guard dog duties. Wife essentially divorced him.

Name of the game is taking everything the king’s ever loved however briefly. So. I have ideas the two brothers Waylon and Al, could be his love interest. The problem is I don’t know which one would be funnier.

The older one named after Waylan, the guy the king is in love with who absolutely doesn’t reciprocate or want to be there, or Al. The kid who set the Autumn King’s house on fire. On one hand you’ve got bragging rights over the situation (“you couldn’t get a Waylon without trickery and mind control and mine asked me out to the movies! Willingly! HA!”) or dating the one that set the king’s house on fire and is waiting to be asked to do it again. Aka using the fact the king is afraid of a 22 year old with matches.

For me mentally the most this changes is interactions, not huge plot points

The reason I’m making it a vote is it’s got a tie among my friends. Two points for Al, two for Waylon. Even one point either way in the next 24 hours will help me a lot lol

[lukkabloom]

Fun facts abt residents according to Ikevamp Radio (ヴァンなま) Part 3

Continuing down the line with episodes 8-10!! These are getting longer bc it's getting more and more chaotic and funny

Episode 8: Makki and Morishi in Vincent and Sebas cosplay!!!!

Morishi (referring to Makki’s amazing cosplay) “I can’t destroy the atmosphere of the game (so I have to look good)… well I kinda already did (destroy it) but…” (the 2nd sentences refers to the fact he says weird things in his “I love yu” segment)

Another thing the two did that was cute—Morishi: does driving motion w/his hands Makki: “You don't see taxi drivers so handsome like you. I would be your customer anytime”

Morishi: “Maybe I should become a driver? Haha”

Also!! Makki: “Is Vincent cute?" Morishi: “Yes, Vincent’s cute. Makki’s cute too”

“I love yu” segment coming up!! Sebas starts out by saying “Sigh. Baths are really nice. It’s so nice that I can forget about the fact that I wasn’t nominated in the ever-so popular Ikemen series election (this was during the Ikemen election of 2018)

Also when Vincent enters the bath, Sebas is like “well, well. If it isn’t Master Vincent, whose route was just released and is gaining popularity by the minute.” (This episode celebrated Vincent’s jp route release) and then continues “Congratulations on your route release” to which Vincent’s confused. And then Sebas coughs and says “please don’t mind me”

Vincent likes oden, thanks Sebas for always cooking delicious food

Sebas stops breathing for a sec, then says “Ugh! As expected of a route-released character. So bright!”

Vincent’s worried abt Sebas’s weird attitude, Sebas reassures him that everything’s fine

The two bathe together so much now that it’s almost like a routine

MC is sick in this episode? Sebas brought her okayu (porridge), she happily accepted

Vincent wants to make her porridge as well, asking Sebas if he should put ginger, tabasco, or habanero to warm up her body. Sebas says “she will probably explode if you do that”

Saddened, Vincent proposes to peel apples, Sebas answers “Nononononono. It’s dangerous.”

Vincent: “It’ll be fine. I’ve actually gotten better at cooking. I can make scrambled eggs now”

Theo used to look after Vincent when he’s gotten sick

Sebas gave Vincent chocolates for valentine’s?? It was chocolate in the shape of a sunflower bouquet??? (how is that possible to make???) For Napoleon, Sebas gave him chocolate in a shape of a horse, Leo was given a chocolate in a shape of cigarettes (that’s kinda funny bc in Japan there are these snacks called Choco Cigarettes which are basically that)

Sebas gave Isaac apple-shaped chocolates, who, according to Sebas, made a weird face upon receiving it

Vincent’s in awe, reaffirming his theory that Sebas can do anything

So Sebas confirms that he only gave the gifts to the residents nominated for the Ikemen series popularity poll (Napo, Leo, Isaac, and Vincent—idk who the last person is) and wishes luck to Vincent (Vincent’s just confused but is like “I’ll do my best, I guess?”)

A new segment of the show called “van Gogh and Sebas and sometimes you!!” Where the viewers can vote on the situation they’d like to be in, and Morishi and Makki will act it out as Vincent and Sebas. The chosen situation was “where you are feeling down, and Vincent and Sebas try to make you laugh by doing funny things” and OMG the things they do are FUNNY AS HECK (aka very ooc), they just scream “yeaaaaaahhhhh!!!”

In the script they were given it literally just says “YEAAAAHHHHH!!!” and everything else was adlib

So next up in the “van Gogh’s drawing section” instead of drawing, they made paper-clay dolls of their characters and… well it was interesting to say the least. I recommend just watching the livestream itself for the experience

The two asked the audience if they even wanted the paper-clay dolls, and they were surprised by the “yes”s 

Anyways my fav segment!!! “Can you tell me… your name?” This one was even funnier by the fact that the camera continued to be focused on the Vincent and Sebas clay dolls while the two said their amazing lines. Well, it was supposed to be like that but there were so many voices of laughter and the two VAs couldn’t take it seriously so the camera zoomed out to their faces

Vincent’s line was “The wind here’s a bit too cool, so come here.” Most were serious names, but the last one was “Sebas, the wind here’s a bit too cool, so come here,” and Morishi just entered into the camera frame (it was zoomed into Makki while he was saying his lines)

Sebas’s chosen line was “Woosh! I have seen the inside of your skirt! (しゃっ！スカートの中いただきました)” (idk even know how to translate it, basically Sebas saw your undies from under your skirt when the wind blew too hard) the facial expression Morishi has while saying this line is so funny

There was “Yoshihiko, woosh! I have seen the inside of your skirt!” Makki replies, “I don’t wear one lol”

Episode 9: feat. Leonardo’s VA Tsuda Kenjiro once again once more

Tsuda stumbled on his line when introducing himself. He went “Leonar—aahhhhh” (he was trying to say something like "The voice of Leonardo da Vinci, Tsuda Kenjiro or smth")

They did a poll bc they were curious on the ages of the audience (0.8% were elementary schoolers, 3.3% middle school, 4.6% high, 13.3% college/university, 78% adult/workers) they think the children are watching by themselves, not w/their parents/guardians (they need to make the show available for all ages)

Very random but there’s a segment (that I never talk abt that’s been existing since the 1st episode) called “Motivation! Energy! Suzuki!” (やる気！元気！鈴木！) where a self-proclaimed low-level Cybird employee Suzuki-san introduces events and gachas happening @ the time of the livestream (you can tell why I skip this section. It doesn’t really apply now) Anyways, so she uses her phone during this segment so the VAs can pull on gachas and listen to voice lines in featured cards, and when her phone went back to her lock screen (accidentally) it showed Mozart’s drawing of Vincent from Vincent’s pre-route release and I thought it was neat

So to the thermae skit!!! This is probably one of my fav thermae skit episodes bc it’s so chaotic

Just like usual, Leo and Sebas sing the song whenever they are a part of the thermae episode (the same song from episodes 1 & 3)

Vincent notices that Leo and Sebas are acting a bit weird, the two join Vincent in the bath to talk about it

Leo asks what Vincent thinks of when he says “spring,” Vincent says that spring reminds him of cherry blossoms and he loves them

Leo thinks of the word “farewell” when thinking of spring, then tells Vincent that he has something to inform him

Leo’s planning to leave the mansion, Vincent’s confused asks him if he fought w/Comte

Sebas urges Vincent to be calm and let Leo continue. Leo describes that has a life-long dream of wanting to be a basketball player (I’m not even sure if basketball even exists during this time??)

Vincent is confused, but Leo continues “I know it’s not like me to say that. Besides, no one has ever heard of a basketball player who's a vampire. So I tried to give up. But nothing I do will let me forget about it!” 

Vincent: “Forget about what?”

Leo: “The sound of a basketball bouncing off the floor!” (Sebas: “dun, dun, dun, dun, dun" <- that's the sound of a basketball hitting the floor) Leo: “It’s almost as if god is telling me to not give up on my real dream”  (Sebas: “dun, dun, dun, dun, dun. Ando-sensei, I want to play basketball.  [←What reference is this idk] dun, dun, dun, dun, dun")

Leo: “So I’ve finally made up my mind. I’ve decided to leave the mansion and go to the Americas.”

Vincent is confused, and during this time, Sebas starts “I’m sorry to interrupt while you are deep in thought, but I also have something to tell you, Master Vincent”

Vincent: “Wait, you’re not going to say that you’ll be leaving the mansion too, right?”

Sebas: “It’s exactly that.” Vincent: “N-no way.”

(So apparently Sebas has been working in the mansion for 3 years?? I’m guessing MC is here rn so… idk more new info ig)

Sebas: “I’ve been really wondering what it means to come face-to-face with others… And my conclusion has led me to… wrestling.” (Vincent's confused even more)

Sebas: “In the sport called wrestling, you face an opponent without any gear. It is the ultimate definition of coming face-to-face (literally) with other’s bodies.”

(IT JUST GETS FUNNIER FROM HERE) 

Leo: “The two of us, in 2020, desire to compete in the Olympics held in Japan.” Sebas: “I believe my goal is to shoulder the Japanese flag (日の丸).”

Leo & Sebas: “(Master) Vincent. The two of us will be leaving this mansion!”

Vincent: “So… you’ve already made your decision. Then, I can’t stop you. Honestly, I’m a little—no. I’ll miss you a lot. I thought of you two like family.”

Leo & Sebas: “F-family…”

Vincent: “But! I shouldn’t do anything like stopping you from achieving your dreams, right? I-I’ll be watching over the two of—”

Sebas: “Ahhh! Stop!”

Vincent: “... ‘Stop?’”

Sebas: “My chest is hurting so much, I can’t continue doing this! Master Leonardo!”

Leo: “Ooooii, Sebas! Do it properly til the very end....”

Leo reveals that April 1st that’s coming up soon, aka, April Fool’s and everything that they stated previously was a lie. Sebas apologizes, willing to do anything to seek forgiveness from Vincent

Vincent is relieved, saying he can’t be angry at the two bc the happiness he feels from being able to spend more time w/the two overpowers the feeling of anger.

Sebas says phrases like “viewers” and “broadcast” confusing Vincent, but Leo tells him not to worry since it’s Sebas’s usual “meta-fictional expression/breaking the 4th wall”

Afterwards, Vincent says “I forgot to tell you two something. Actually, I’m not a big fan of baths because they’re too hot.”

Leo & Sebas: “EEEEHhhhhhhh!!”

Vincent: “It's a lie. Sorry. I wanted to tell one. Haha. To be honest, I really like baths!”

(I can’t believe I translated almost the whole skit that took so much time. I hope I don’t do that again... I will do it again)

“Can you tell me… your name?” segment comin up!!! Dang Leo’s line “Come here, closer.” his VA has such a good voice I’m swooning

Sebas’s line “Do you want to eat dried squid (atarime)?” Is just so random?? Like usually his lines are funny but at least related to the season or holiday at the time of the broadcast, but you can literally eat dried squid any time of year.

Anyways onto the names being called. There was “Atarime, do you want to eat dried squid?” and “Makki, do you want to eat dried squid?” w/Makki quietly replying “yes, yes.” There was also Tsuda-san and oyaji (dad).

Episode 10: for the first time in this radio the VAs are doing it in front of an audience

(Idk why this link looks a bit weird)

They do this episode in their cosplay which looks amazing as usual

Morishi had Vincent’s Drama CD, and wanted both Vincent and Makki to sign it, addressed to him. Also wanted Makki to draw both Morishi and Makki’s face on it (Makki did all that)

Makki said that Morishi is slowly eating at Sebas's character (basically Sebas turning into Morishi himself)

The return of the “van Gogh and Sebas and something you!!” segment!!! Lmao all the situation descriptions are so long. The chosen situation was “Protecting you from a suddenly-appearing enemy. However, Vincent and Sebas can’t decide who will hold them back, instead arguing against each other” One of the choices was the one they did last time, and Makki was like “pls don’t choose that one” (the one where they try to make you laugh)

Vincent: “We can’t hold them back. Let’s divide the work. One of us will take her (MC) and run away while the other holds back the opponent.”

Sebas: “A very smart decision. In that case, Master Vincent, I’ll leave everything to you here.” takes you away

Vincent: “Eh? Sebas? Isn’t it typically the opposite?”  Sebas: “Eh?”  Vincent: “It looks like we need to have a discussion”

Vincent: “Hey, strong opponent,”  Sebas & Vincent: “wait a moment!”

Vincent’s reasons as to why Sebas should stay is bc Sebas can do anything, so he should be able to hold back the enemy.

Sebas: “Master Vincent, you have more hit points (hp) than me” (since when was this a RPG??)

Vincent: “But above my hp, it says I’m poisoned”   Sebas: “but you only lose 1 health for each poison damage. I’m paralyzed, so—” Vincent: “You’re paralyzed?” Sebas: “and I’m cursed, so I should get away first”

Vincent: “But see, I don’t have any gear equipped.” Sebas: points to Vincent's scarf “But you have your scarf”

Vincent: points to Sebas’s vest “But this jacket here—it gives 100 defense, right?”   Sebas: “I got it. I’ll just take it off” Sebas takes off his outer jacket

Vincent: “Wait, Sebas…”  Sebas: “And then, finally—” Vincent: grabs Sebas's inner jacket “you’re wearing two jackets?”

The discussion was going nowhere, so they decided to end with rock-paper-scissors. Sebas won against Vincent. Vincent: “Sebas escaped, but I’ll do anything for her.” (he says this thrice, showing how salty he is)

Makki said this happens in a parallel world, different from the typical ikevamp period

Thermae episode coming up!! Aka they become idols!!

MC looked tired recently, from overworking and stress, so Sebas came up with an ultimate plan named “I want to make her happy! So we will become idols!”

Vincent doesn’t know what an idol is, Sebas describes it as someone who can sing and dance and make others happy. Vincent’s not sure if they can be something as amazing as that

Sebas: “With your pretty face, dignified personality, and angelic smile, you have all the attributes of an idol”

Vincent: “Sebas too, works hard all the time, and both your personality and appearance is very cool.” Sebas: “thank you for the compliment. Recently, I’ve been feeling that one of my charm points, my coolness, has been challenged.” (It's prob bc you're so weird in these skits, Sebas!!)

Sebas creates rules to become an idol. “Rule #1: an idol’s introduction must be catchy!” Vincent can’t think of one on the spot, so Sebas pre-made one for him. 

Sebas: “Hii! I come from Japan. I’m known as Sebas, aka Sebastian. My job as a butler is always done in a relaxed manner—” Vincent: “Relaxed!” Sebas: “controlling everyone with a cool stare—” Vincent: “Control!” Sebas: “I always understand my position. I keep my emotions in check—” Vincent: “Check!” (Vincent’s chanting Sebas’s words btw) Sebas: “But for tonight, I can express my feelings.”

Anyways it’s Vincent’s turn. Vincent: "Hai! From Groot Zundert, I’m everyone’s angel, Vincent! My hair texture is fluffy!” Sebas: “fluffy!” (Sebas is chanting now) Vincent: “My mood is fluffy!”   Sebas: “fluffy!”  Vincent: “I want to surround you fluffily (?), help you relax with my angelic aura! But… (he suddenly gets serious) don’t forget that I’m actually a man.”

(Both Sebas & Vincent’s lines are supposed to rhyme but my tiny brain doesn’t form great words to do that so you’ll get the literal translation here :PP)

Vincent says he’s embarrassed from doing that, and feels his face getting hot. Sebas says they should get going to the next page of the idol adventure

Vincent’s like “We’re striving to be idols, right? By the time we get there, I feel like she will have recovered…” Sebas: “...” Vincent: “You didn’t realize that, Sebas? You must really like her…” Sebas: “It seems like it…”

They decide to visit her instead after the bath to make her feel better and help her improve

Also I really wasn’t expecting so many ppl to be interested in this??? Anyways I finished all the episodes so as I promised the next parts will be coming out in the next two days :))

[mylittleredgirl]

voyager high school au

i feel like we as a species are really missing an important angle on this much-abused trope.

usually high school aus take our current, fully developed characters and de-age them into teenage equivalents (tuvok is captain of the chess team, harry is in all AP classes but is somehow a freshman forever, seven demolishes at quiz bowl and "steals" the class president's prom date at the last minute because she hasn't realized that lesbianism is an option, etc).

however, if you have to send them to high school, i think it would be much funnier if we imagine them as they canonically were as teens.

--

janeway is an admiral's daughter who stormed off after losing a tennis match and dramatically walked home like 5 miles in the rain. you just know that if she got a 98 out of 100 on a project (still solidly an A+!) she would go up after class to argue the two point deduction. she might actually be the class president, but idk if the other kids are happy about it.

chakotay is a sullen, angsty kid who hates his dad, hates his tribe, and just wants to go to junior college and never set foot on the rez again. so many internalized things to unpack. this boy is a mess

Passion Punk™️ tuvok canonically got kicked out of the house for saying that everything his dad believes in fuckin sucks

b'elanna also thinks her culture of origin fuckin sucks. child of ugly divorce, regularly suspended for brawling. she may have gotten sent to klingon religious school to scare her straight at one point? i gotta look that up but i'm pretty sure it happened

like janeway, tom is also an admiral's kid. everyone says he has sooooo much potential but he spends all his time crying in his room and reading jules verne

seven is in a massively abusive cult. this one's not funny at all ☹️

harry is the best adjusted out of everyone. great relationship with his parents, probably has had the same girlfriend since eighth grade (who is also well-adjusted). youth orchestra. early decision to harvard. i typed out "voted most likely to succeed," but that's definitely wrong, because it would be tom out of nepotism or janeway out of grit (and nepotism). if it were a category though, teenage harry would be voted "most likely to just have a nice life."

kes is the smartest kid in her grade but you would never know it because she just hangs out with the hippie kids in the woods behind the school, eating moss off trees and planning to run away from home

all we really know about neelix's pre-war childhood is that he had a huge loving family. i'm extrapolating here from the skills and attitude he has as an adult, but when i transpose this into a modern high school AU, i imagine his parents running the local diner and letting all of neelix's loser friends (see the rest of this list) eat there for free.

the doctor sprang into being as an adult so i'm not sure what to do here. you could argue that he was kind of a canonical teenager in season one, in which case he's that autistic kid who everyone remembers showing up to kindergarten with a briefcase and a full suit, having already memorized A thru G in the world book. somehow you never really see him anywhere except on school grounds. this year's special interest is opera.

vorik is also there.