#or just take any personality that i see in the wild
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jellybeanium124 · 2 days ago
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if you'll allow me to flaunt my psych minor for a second, I'd like to talk about epigenetics. there's studies that show that if you shock a rat when you let them taste a certain flavor, they will immediately become averse to that flavor. not surprising. what is surprising is that the rat's grandchildren, who have never been shocked when given that flavor, will also be averse to it and afraid of it and avoid it. there's also correlational evidence to suggest that the descendants of people who suffered through famine are more likely to put on weight and keep it on easier, even if they have never been through a famine themself.
trauma gets passed down. the kinds of trauma your parents, grandparents, and so-on lived through is still living in you. even if your parents were the most well-off, loving, best parents in the world, their trauma is still in you.
now if you'll allow me to take a slight turn here: there's a wild rabbit inside every jew.
my dad grew up being called "jew-boy." my mother had a coworker throw pennies at her at her job in the 2010s. and that's just two examples. they both grew up being harassed for being jewish. I wasn't. I'm incredibly lucky. the amount of antisemitism I've experienced in real life has been incredibly minimal. I didn't even hear anyone make an antisemitic joke in front of me until college.
and none of us were seriously persecuted. none of my grandparents were seriously persecuted. but even though nobody's broken my windows, nobody's beaten me in the streets, and I haven't been at any of those horrible protests in person, the fear is there. this deep seated, blood-pumping fear of the ancient jewish rabbit in me telling me to run. to run for dear life, to run as far as my legs can get me, as long as my heart keeps pumping and my lungs keep breathing.
we all feel this.
everyone feels this.
I called my mother yesterday. when I brought up this feeling she paused, and the silence said everything. she told me I wasn't alone. she feels it. my dad feels it. my brother feels it. my nana and grampa feel it. every jew you know, online, in real life, hell, even the famous ones, they feel it. the rabbit is inside us all, and the rabbit knows, because its brothers who didn't flee in the past were slaughtered.
the rabbit is leaping around my chest, all of our chests, chanting run run run run run run run.
I don't know if I can explain it to gentiles. I don't know if this makes sense to you. I don't know how to get across how crystal clear and deep and primal this fear is, and how much all of us are feeling the exact same fear, despite our different lives and different histories and the fact we're different people.
part of me wishes it didn't matter. that I didn't feel like I needed to get goyim to understand my specific cultural and ethnic experiences. because I don't feel like I need to deeply understand everyone else's. I am a white passing ashkenazi american jew, and I will never fully understand what it is like to be anything else. that doesn't dissolve my responsibility to educate myself and practice empathy, but it's ok. idk, maybe other people do desperately wish they could get people not in their specific group to deeply understand what it's like to be them. I imagine that feeling is universal. I guess, it's just like, the left is unified that everyone is a person, everyone is equal, everyone is human, except the jews. nobody is left out but the jews. everyone's word is believed, but the jews. and it makes me feel like I have to beg and plead with people to understand what being jewish means, because we're not included with everyone else. we're the enemy. and I want people to see we're not the enemy.
epigenetics.
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tammog · 3 days ago
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I agree with you, and also:
Even aside from this specifically - which is wild to say, endorsing and funding a genocide that is ongoing right now should be a dealbreaker for anyone - her campaign also:
Sent Bill Clinton to Michigan Arab communities where he told people Israeli soldiers HAD to kill civilians and that Israel had been there before Palestine.
Said she would take Republicans into her cabinet while the entire world can see that the right wing is a death cult.
Embraced Dick fucking Cheney's endorsement? When being endorsed by him is an insult even for a ton of liberals, which was honestly a little surprising for me - I had thought less of them.
And honestly picking the person that was out first in the last Dem primary without a new primary (didn't she get like <5% of the vote in the primary last time around?), with Biden not stepping back to let her be President and at least give her a chance to show she has chops (given that VPs in general do very little, and her statements during her VP-hood were also ass), and just immediately killing any momentum her campaign had across the political spectrum to try and get right-wing voters for some reason are just the biggest political blunders I have ever seen. This campaign was doomed, it's as if they tried to lose.
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lmao, libs are dealing with it well i see
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mllemaenad · 2 days ago
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I really do not understand why Varric is the one pursuing Solas. I mean, I understand the Doylist explanation – Varric is a beloved character who will now have featured in three separate games, as well as multiple novels and comics.
But the Watsonian explanation is not clicking. I did my homework. I sat down and read The Missing, but that did not help at all. In fact, I have now considered my Inquisitor and am completely confident that Dirthara Lavellan's plan for dealing with the Solas problem would absolutely not be "send the ageing viscount of Kirkwall on a months long wild goose chase, with the apparent end goal of ... talking Solas out of his plan".
First, I don't see why Varric would be the most likely person to be able to reach Solas. The Inquisitor herself seems the more reasonable option.
Second, Varric is viscount of Kirkwall, a city-state notorious for setting itself on fire if you take your eyes off it for five minutes. I appreciate Alistair had a few adventures in the graphic novels, and there was that time Maric got lost in the Deep Roads but ... broadly, heading up the "Stop Solas" taskforce is a whole separate responsibility that does not seem to be something you should allocate to a man who has the Worst City in Thedas to rule.
Third ... seriously, the plan is to find Solas and have a chat? That's it? It's clearly it. All through The Missing, they keep noting that they don't really know what they'll do if they actually stumble across Solas. And the backup plan, to which Harding occasionally alludes and at which Varric consistently baulks, is to stab Solas until he stops moving. That one ... also doesn't inspire much confidence.
At this point, I'm not sure what Solas's plan entails or exactly what the outcome will be. I'm not even 100% sure I'm opposed to it. I recognise that the narrative is telegraphing that this is bad but, eh, they say that about blood magic too, and my feelings on that are much more complicated.
Surely, instead of chasing Solas all over the map like a fantasy Where in the World is Carmen Sandiego?, we should be researching what his scheme entails, and potentially how to disrupt it. There have to be options other than this. We have a game series littered with elven scholars like Merrill, accomplished mages like Dorian or Morrigan, thoughtful rebels like Briala or Anders and ... we're ... not ... going to do anything with that?
In both Origins and Inquisition the set up established that there was a solid plan that unexpectedly failed: the Battle of Ostagar in the former and the Conclave in the latter. While I was not a fan of how many of its established plot lines Inquisition chose to just blow up instead of actually resolving, I at least understand how both scenarios led to a rag tag band who should never have been responsible for any of this saving the world. Dragon Age 2 was about the systematic failure of government in Kirkwall and, again, Hawke is forced to act as the people in power utterly refuse to do anything reasonable at all.
Here, my question is – why are we doing it like this now, before we have to?
Ah, well. Maybe it will become clear in time. I may look back on this post and laugh.
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lillypad-monopoly · 1 day ago
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Wild Life Episode 3 Thoughts
Sorry I don't have very good commentary this week. I was really busy and then life happened so I watched these POVs over the course of 6 days and didn't always take live notes.
The snail gimmick is iconic! Another amazing wildcard and a good Grian reference as well as being memey!
Someone joked about them being soulbound to the snails and I'm praying for the return of a soulbond Wildcard so hard right now
I'm genuinely concerned Skizz and Jimmy won't make it to episode 5. I hope we get some more passive wildcards coming up or this is going to be a pretty short series (also I would like them to get some stuff done)
Grian freezing the game is the lore event ever. Watcher powers are real but also he's clearly fighting back against their agenda more this season (once again such angst potential here RE: Grian knowing the wildcards ahead of time)
Ren digging all those holes looking for their horse is literally the definition of insanity and it's hilarious
Martyn and Etho interacting is always interesting both because the anime skin boys are hanging out together and because they have literally opposite playstyles. Martyn is crazy reckless and Etho is soo careful.
WHY DO REN AND MARTYN HAVE A DOUBLE BED
I really want to know all the snail names, since not everybody died this ep
I love that we're kind of going back to "suggestions" again, what with Tango killing Skizz and Martyn making snails invisible just for kicks. It feels like 3L and it's so fun.
I was so excited for Bdubs angst hour only for him to change his mind and not feel bad about anything after all
Etho's monologue 😂. The reason the go for you early is because they see you as a threat, not because they think you're not tough OMG.
Etho don't die to a creeper in the life series challenge impossible
Watching PICS build a base was actually so refreshing. I love the snail gimmick very much but it was nice to watch a POV where they were actually doing some classic life series stuff
Scott predicting violence for the next ep is...concerning lol. I don't know what he's seeing that I'm not, but outside of wild card stuff it doesn't really feel like we're at that point just yet
Actually I wouldn't put it past Tango to go wild. I'm just not sure the other Tuff Guys will follow him
I will be quoting "He's coming and he has only violence in his heart" from now on thank you Scott
Joel saying they have no enemies is so funny. The reason you don't have any enemies is cause everyone is too scared to cross you 😂.
Gem being excited about her snail while everyone else panics is iconic I love her
Joel giving Skizz a PVP lesson is so funny because Skizz *can* PVP from what I recall (I haven't seen a lot of Skizz so I could be wrong here)
Jimmy blowing up the car in front of Joel, Gem and Etho is the definition of "history doesn't repeat itself, it rhymes"
Lizzie I love you but you need to turn down something on your texture pack because everything is so bright
Bdubs manufacturing Tuff Guy behavior killed me. All of the Tuff Guys are such wet cats I love them <3
I've never watched Empires, but the bit where Jimmy gets blown up by a creeper has such powerful older sister/younger brother energy that I think I might have to headcanon them as siblings now
Scar and Lizzie being in the caves for the introduction of the snails and trying to figure out what's going on feels like a horror movie premise. People mysteriously dying to snail related stuff, and then a mob that's not in the game shows up and looks similar to the other person you're with and is following you around...
Team Bam/The Bamboozlers are as chaotic and struggling as hard as I expected. I don't actually want Lizzie to loose her teammates because I want everybody in until the last session, but it would be really funny if she did.
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ellitx · 1 day ago
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Helloooow!
Your blog is like nectar to a starving hummingbird in the deseeeeert there is not enough Venti content on the fanfiction side of this fandom istg so THANK YOU for taking care of us Venti fans!
I read through quite a lot of your works (and Venti centered works in general) and I noticed a trend in all of the darlings either being reserved and shy / standoffish or being gentle and incredibly soft-spoken / naive.
No doubt about Venti actually falling for someone like that since opposites attract, but I was wondering if you could imagine him with a more confident and extroverted darling as well?
A type of darling that has a "so what if people will look on? Maybe they want to secretly join in on being silly, too!"- attitude and is non-flirtatiously playful / witty? And perhaps isn't as easily foiled or can see through people's intentions a little more clearly since she has experience with dealing with different personalities.
Someone who would pull all the other shy people into the dancing circle and is pretty good masking embarrassment / faking it until she makes it!
Would it aggravate Venti even more to get her flustered? Or is that a type of darling he wouldn't even bat an eye towards? What do you think?
Extroverted darling is the type who venti will enjoy having a drink with at the tavern
They’d get along pretty quick if darling is able to give the same energy as venti’s, though when it comes to romance, it would take some time for him to fall for them. If in a scenario, darling was the one who fell first, he’ll immediately notice but won’t say a word. He doesn’t want to presume but he does give flirtatious remarks
But if we’re speaking that he’s a yandere, he would enjoy another bright presence. He’d let you run wild and surprisingly he’s not very restrictive. He still wanted you to enjoy life and be yourself. The thing that makes it frightening for yan venti with an extroverted darling is, well, manipulating your feelings.
And if darling fell for him, he’d definitely take advantage of it. He didn’t missed you were throwing hints at him, but he’s feigning ignorance. He wants to hear you say it to him directly. Even if you joked that you love him or you want spend your life together with him, he’ll take that as a confession seriously and claiming you’re “officially” together.
What’s worse is that if you like drinking and you have low alcohol tolerance, he’ll take advantage of it as well. He puts on the bestest-best friend facade with you. Obviously he doesn’t do anything to you when you were getting to know him. Nothing of that sort you’d imagine.
If you get drunk, he’d carry you home and joked about not reaching his level. When you passed out the first time you were with him, you were on your guard. You woke up with the evening sky greeting you and jolting up immediately, you almost knocked Venti out.
He stayed with you throughout the night, accompanying you back to your home as you thanked him for watching over you. It became a norm for you both that either would pass out and the other would care for them. That’s why you prefer drinking with him. You’re guaranteed he’ll handle you if you want to get yourself drunk and have fun dancing at the tavern when he plays his music.
Everything he does are so normal you don’t even see anything malicious.
He’d bring you to the tavern for a drink, chatting on your way there. But upon entering, all seats were occupied. There must be a celebration and a lot of the knights were inside. You all searched from top to bottom for any vacant seats, but none can be found. You can’t go to cat’s tail because of his allergies, and you aren’t letting Venti steal a bottle. Otherwise, you’d be counted as his accomplice.
When one client finally left, he took the seat and you’re just there… standing. He arched his brow and asked you to sit. You’re baffled by his question until he patted his lap with an almost casual confidence, clearly unfazed by the bustling crowd around you.
You hesitated, feeling the heat rise to your cheeks. His suggestion was bold, to say the least, and though you were no stranger to his antics, this felt different. You quickly denied but he just sighed and propped his chin on his palm.
Why would you be so embarrassed? You’ve been friends for a long time and frequently flirting back and forth so how was this any different? Everyone in the town already knows how close you are with him. Even Diluc knows your frequent shenanigans with this bard.
His fingers drummed lightly on the wooden table, tapping in rhythm with the music playing nearby, waiting for you to move. The packed room left little space to move, making it clear that finding another seat was out of the question. Eventually, with a resigned sigh, you took a step closer, noticing the faintest glimmer of satisfaction across his face. He shifted, making room for you as his arms rested lightly at his sides, inviting yet unassuming.
You sat on his lap, trying to keep your composure as he adjusted to ensure you were comfortable. When he called the bartender and ordered your usual drinks, you looked away to hide your red face. Usually, you’d brush it off and come up with an excuse, but your mind was running in miles you couldn’t think clearly. You could feel his breath close to your shoulder, relaxing with you there, as if this was the most natural thing in the world.
The music grew louder, voices around you rising in cheer, but you found yourself catching his hand drifting over your thighs. At first you ignored it, thinking his hand was just there to rest. But when you felt his palm rubbing up and down your skin, your cheeks warmed up with your mouth agape.
You wanted to scold him, question what was he doing. As you turned to him and opened your mouth, Charles arrived with your drinks, placing the mugs on the table. Venti thanked him, leaving you a bit awkward when he grabbed his drink. You though he finally stopped, and you weren’t going to bother bringing it up to him— assuming it was just his gesture of concern for his best friend— but his hand returned between your thighs.
His fingertips brushed up against your inner thigh, gliding slowly up. You pushed his wrist, the slightest signal to stop and to avoid unnecessary commotion, but he just drank as his fingers ran close between your legs. You tugged his hand but instead he slipped his finger in yours, twining them in place. His eyes were focused straight ahead, expression completely neutral, and unfazed.
Your were so confused, trying to grasp what had gotten to him. Venti was forward, but not this forward. Maybe it’s a sort of gesture to calm you. You were pretty flustered back there when he offered his lap, and you already knew how touchy he was. But this didn’t seem like…
You grabbed your tankard and took a heavy gulp, pushing down any conflicting emotions. Sure, you like him and even joked having feelings for him, but that’s because you didn’t want to ruin your friendship.
He loves wine and jokes. He sings for every event and playfully flirts. And you? You love him. That sounds stupid but it's the truth. If only you could muster courage and confess to him. If only you could get on his good side to the extent where you two would have romantic kind of moment without the need for alcohol.
You asked Charles for another glass and you didn’t notice his hands crept under your shirt. You were too drunk to differentiate the sensations swarming over your skin. His fingers stroked along the sensitive curve of your stomach, the other arm firm around you as you glanced at him, he didn't seem bothered. His lips moved as if he was talking to you, but you couldn’t hear anything when the music was too loud and the knights were clamouring. You simply hummed, nodding along to whatever he was saying.
He offered you another glass and you accepted. The drink was stronger this time, or maybe you were finally feeling the weight of each glass catching up to you. The room swayed slightly as you raised the glass, taking another heavy gulp, the world beginning to blur.
You weren’t sure if it was the alcohol or the emotions you’d been trying so hard to drown that made the warmth creep into your cheeks, a sensation almost too intense to ignore. Somewhere deep down, you knew you were pushing past your limit, but here, with Venti’s laughter echoing somewhere beside you, it didn’t feel so bad.
He watched you carefully, concern crossing his usually carefree face as you reached for the next drink. His smile lingered, as he subtly moved closer, reaching out a steadying hand as you swayed again. The tavern lights glimmering above in dizzying patterns. You tried to flash him a reassuring smile, but a small giggle left your lips as you felt something ticklish on your stomach.
You were vaguely aware of his fingers brushing against you, grounding you just enough to stop the world from spinning. The voices in the tavern grew more distant, their laughter fading off. Somewhere along the way, you lost count of how many times you’d tried to quiet your thoughts. You leaned your head against his shoulder, watching his lips move, his voice softer, almost soothing, though you couldn’t make out the words. His breath brushed against your ear and you nodded absentmindedly.
The last thing you felt was Venti’s arms wrapping around you, his voice a quiet murmur lost to the noise as he carried you out of the tavern.
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punksyeet · 13 hours ago
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ᰔᩚ Distance ᰔᩚ
Plot: A glimpse into a day in the life of Gianna (OC) when her man is on the road.
Warning: Mature language & over-the-phone smut!
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It's 2pm and, since I had a heavy breakfast, I'm currently making a fruit bowl for lunch.
Josh always makes me these when he's home and not on the road, so I decided to make it to kinda bring me some comfort with him being gone.
For context, it's WrestleMania weekend, and he has a match tomorrow for the first night, as well as tonight for SmackDown, so he's been on the road a little extra lately.
Despite how proud I am of him, since a match against his twin brother has always been a dream for them both, it doesn't make me miss him any less.
As I finish chopping some pineapple, I throw the scraps away and hear my phone ding, signaling that I got a text message.
I wash my hands, tap on the screen, and smile as I read.
Joshua 🤍: Hi baby
My Lady ♥️: Hi lovebug <3
Joshua 🤍: How'd you sleep?
My Lady ♥️: Okay. Not nearly as good as I do when you're here.
Joshua 🤍: I know baby. Me too. But we'll be back together soon okay?
My Lady ♥️: Okay 🥲🫶🏽
Joshua 🤍: I miss you lots mama ❤️
My Lady ♥️: I miss you more 🤍
Joshua 🤍: Impossible
My Lady ♥️: Shh it's possible
Joshua 🤍: Hmm yeah? Prove it.
Smirking and raising an eyebrow, I send him some videos and pictures I took last night in my brand new lingerie.
I leave the audio on, which is filled with moans and me whimpering his name.
He'll definitely enjoy these.
My Lady ♥️: [Attachment: 2 videos, 3 images]
Joshua 🤍: Holy fuck
My Lady ♥️: I win 😏
Joshua 🤍: Damn right you do ma 😮‍💨
Joshua 🤍: When did you get that set?
My Lady ♥️: Yesterday at the mall. Do you like it?
Joshua 🤍: I love it baby. You look so sexy. I can't wait to see it on you in person when I get home.
My Lady ♥️: Thank you baby 🥹
Joshua 🤍: [Attachment: 1 image]
Joshua 🤍: Look what you do to me 👀
I'm practically drooling at the sight of his boner very visible in his black sweatpants.
I bite my lip before replying.
My Lady ♥️: Ugh I need that inside me right about now 😩
Joshua 🤍: Mmm soon enough baby ❤️
My Lady ♥️: I miss you so much :(
Joshua 🤍: I miss you too beautiful. And I love you. More than anything. 🫶🏽
My Lady ♥️: I love you too <3
Joshua 🤍: Alright I have a promo with Jon in a few so I gotta go fix this new issue I have in my pants. I'll call you later, okay?
My Lady ♥️: LOL sounds good baby. I'll be watching. 🤍
Joshua 🤍: I know you will babygirl ❤️
You loved "I know you will babygirl ❤️"
Ugh this man drives me crazy.
I set my phone down and continue making my fruit bowl.
Once I'm finished, I take everything out to the backyard and sit at the table.
I unlock my phone and open the kickoff show YouTube stream to my man's entrance music.
He's dressed in a blue YEET crop top, matching glasses, black sweatpants, white air forces, his silver Cuban link chain, and fan bracelets.
I pop a piece of watermelon in my mouth and smile, as he comes out onto the stage and the crowd goes wild.
He's so over with the crowd it's crazy.
I'm so happy for and proud of him. <3
A few minutes have gone by and the promo is coming to a close.
"Tomorrow night," he begins. "Jimmy and Jey. Tomorrow night we stand on business. Man, tomorrow night, you boutta catch this yeet-down."
The crowd follows up his quote with a "YEET!"
"And if you want Jimmy Uso to catch this yeet-down," he continues. "Then lemme hear you say YEET!"
The crowd, once again, answers him with "YEET!" and cheers as his music plays.
I smile and clap my hands, feeling extra proud of him.
I love Jon like a brother, but I just know my man has this match in the bag.
I decide to shoot him a quick little text:
Me: You killed that shit baby. So proud of you! 🥹🤍
I finish up my fruit and, as I'm washing out the bowl, my phone rings. I smile when I see it's from my best friend and Josh's sister in law, Trinity.
G: Hey Trin!
T: Hey babygirl! How are you?
G: I'm good! Just finished watching the guys' promo. You?
T: Ugh me too girl. I'm nervous but, no matter who comes out on top, they're gonna kill it tomorrow.
I smile, nodding in agreement.
G: Agreed! So what's up with you?
T: Not much, girl. I actually called to invite you over. I'm feeling pretty lonely without Jon here and I'd imagine you're feeling the same way about Josh.
I let out a deep sigh.
G: Girl you have no idea.
She giggles.
T: Come over then! We can go in the pool, take some cute pictures, and spend some time together. That way we can keep them off our minds for a bit.
I smile and dry off the bowl.
G: Sounds like a plan girlfriend. I'll be over in about an hour or so.
She squeals and claps her hands.
T: Period! I'll see you soon babe!
We say our goodbyes and I head upstairs to shower and get ready.
I decide on a simple yellow cheeky bikini, throw a tube top and denim shorts over it, then head out.
—————————————————————————————————
I've been over at Trin's for a few hours now.
Our reason for hanging out has been quite the success: while I still miss Josh a ton, she's been keeping my mind off of it.
We decided to order in our favorite Chinese takeout and tune into SmackDown.
Specifically, Josh and his little brother Joseph aka Solo Sikoa’s match.
As my man is about to pin him, Jon comes running in from beside the ring, stopping the count.
I sigh and take a bite of my sesame chicken as Trin sucks her teeth. "He's so messy and for what?"
I shake my head letting out a soft giggle. "Girl that's your man. You're allowed to support him, I'll be okay."
She playfully shoves my arm and we share a laugh, before the crowd's cheering gets our attention and we turn back to the TV.
The camera pans to Cody Rhodes and Seth Rollins running out to the ring.
Eventually, they make it and fight off Jon and Solo, saving my man.
A soft smile appears on my face as Josh climbs to the top rope and delivers an Uso Splash to his twin.
"Girl," Trin says breathlessly, before taking a sip from her wine glass. "This rivalry got me all the way fucked up."
I nod in agreement. "Amen to that. Hopefully after tomorrow they can just hug it out and make up."
She nods and we share a laugh, then proceed to watch the rest of the show.
After another few hours of watching our favorite romcoms, eating, and sharing laughs, it's past midnight and I decide to head home.
"Alright boo," Trin says, leaning against my window once I'm in my car safely. "Drive safely and please text me once you get home."
"I will," I reply, and we share yet another hug through the window. "I love you."
"I love you too babygirl," she exclaims.
We say our goodbyes and I head off.
About 15 minutes into driving, my phone rings and reveals that Josh is FaceTiming me.
I smile, connect my phone to bluetooth, prop it up so that he can see me, and answer.
His gorgeous face pops up on my screen.
He seems to be laid in his hotel room bed, with his arm propped behind his head.
G: "Hi lovebug."
J: "Hey babygirl. Where you headed at this time of night?"
G: "Home. I was at Trin's place for a while. We had a pool day and watched the show together."
J: "Aw that sounds nice."
I smile while stopping at a red light and lift up my arms to stretch, yawning in the process.
He smiles, just sitting there watching me.
J: "Tired mama?"
G: "Exhausted. I can't wait to take a shower and sleep."
He lets out a chuckle.
J: "I bet. I wish I was there to help you relax."
G: "Me too baby. I miss you."
J: "I miss you more ma. But I'll be home before you know it."
I nod, giving him a soft smile and turning onto our block.
Soon enough, I park my car in our driveway and head into the house, locking the door behind me.
I shoot Trin a text while still on the phone with Josh:
Gigi 💗: Hey sis. I just made it home. 🤍
Trin 🥰🫶🏽: Good to hear girl. It was so good seeing you today. ❤️
Gigi 💗: Same here. Love you! 🫶🏽
Trin 🥰🫶🏽: Love you too! Sleep well. 🥰
You loved “Love you too! Sleep well. 🥰”
I smile and close my tabs, going back to the FaceTime with my man.
Assuming he's getting ready for a shower, he peels his shirt off, revealing his gorgeously toned torso and perfectly caramel colored tattooed skin.
Fuck I miss that body so badly.
He must've caught me lacking, because he smirks and raises an eyebrow.
J: "You like what you see, baby?"
I bite my lip, nodding.
G: "You know I do. I miss having that body all to myself every night."
J: "Who says you can't?"
I raise an eyebrow, clearly confused, before he continues.
** tiny smut warning! **
J: "Get those clothes off and lay down for me, mama."
I bite my lip and stare at the screen for a second as he sexily pulls down his sweats and boxers, allowing his dick to spring free.
I prop up my phone so that he can see me and slowly peel off my clothes as well.
He begins to get hard and strokes himself at the sight of my now naked body.
J: "Fuck baby. Your body...the things it does to me...you're so dangerous."
I sit on my knees and massage my breasts, sticking out my tongue and allowing my saliva to drip onto them.
J: "Good girl baby. Play with those tits for daddy. You know just what I like."
After a few minutes of this, we move onto my lower half.
"F-fuck daddy! Just like that!" I moan, my head thrown back, pumping my fingers in and out of my hole.
Josh moans along with me, stroking his now wet hand from the base to the tip of his dreamy dick, never taking his eyes off of me.
J: "I want you to cum for daddy. Let go. Can you do that for me?"
"U-uh huh," I reply, my fingers still at work, except now they're making rapid circles on my clit.
J: "Use your words for daddy, baby."
"Y-yes daddy!" I utter out in between moans, slowly but surely reaching my climax.
J: “Good girl.”
Just seconds later, I feel a pit in my stomach.
“D-daddy! I’m so fucking close!” I practically scream.
J: “Cum for daddy, baby. Gimme that shit.”
My body jerks as warm, white liquid pours out of me and onto the bed.
J: "Pick up your phone baby. Daddy wants to watch all that cum spill out of your pretty lil pussy."
I do as he says and, soon enough, I've made a huge mess all over our sheets.
And as if on cue, he hits his climax as well.
** smut over! **
"Fuck," I whisper breathlessly, laying back and panting like a nut job.
I can hear deep breaths coming through his side of the phone as well.
J: "You did so well for me baby. And once I get home, it's gonna be even sweeter."
I nod, my mouth still hanging open.
He chuckles and cleans up his mess, as I quickly change our sheets and get ready for my shower.
"I'm gonna get in the shower and hop in bed," I exclaim, my voice just above a whisper. "I'll call you in the morning?"
He nods. "Sounds good, mama. Go get some rest. I love you."
I give him a soft smile. "I love you too, baby. Good night."
We say our goodbyes and he even kisses me through the phone, causing me to giggle before we hang up.
I toss my phone aside and head into the bathroom.
I take a steaming hot everything shower, do my nighttime skin care, brush my teeth, all of that.
Once finished, I climb into bed and tuck myself under the covers.
I reach over and grab one of Josh's pillows from his side of the bed and snuggle it.
It smells heavenly - just like him.
The scent brings me automatic comfort, and within minutes, I drift off to sleep.
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nightwonder7 · 3 days ago
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NORTON GHOST AU.. NORTALICE PLESSS??
Okay I'll indulge fghdsjfkgsjka
Norton would be one of the ghosts who'd be more pessimistic about Alice at first. He had no faith in her solving their predicament and just wanted her to go away so they could be left in peace. And when the other ghosts agree to ask for her help (he was against this), he became reticent and tried to avoid her.
At first Alice respected his wishes of wanting to be left alone, but she couldn't help but wonder if there was something she had done to upset him because of the way he acted towards her. She wanted to resolve any issues that may be between them as they are practically living together for an undetermined amount of time. Otherwise things will just be uncomfortable all around. Unfortunately, Norton is one of the more stubborn ghosts and would act cold towards her and push her away. Still, Alice is curious about Norton. She doesn't know exactly why, but something about him seemed enticing in a way. Perhaps she could sense there was something more to him than this brick wall he presented as.
Norton could often be found outside alone in the forest near by or in the court yard. He seemed to prefer the open sky over the enclosed spaces in the manor. While outside he would just wander around, like he is searching for something, inspecting the rocks on the ground. Or he would lie sprawled out on the grass and stare at the sky. Alice had on several occasions tried to approach Norton when she sees him out and about alone, but as soon as she closes in on him, he would just give her this dead look and vanish before her eyes.
Once it becomes apparent that each ghost needs to resolve their trauma in order to lift the curse, they have no choice but to work together, much to Norton's dismay. He did NOT budge at first and tried avoiding her even more. I can picture this scenario where Alice keeps finding him again and again after he vanishes whenever she approaches him, and he becomes increasingly frustrated that she seems to know where he is every time (she had taken a mental note of all the spots he frequents and used that to track him down). It becomes this slow, wild chase until Norton is fed and tells her to leave him the heck alone. But Alice is insistent; working through this together will make it easier for the both of them. It needs to be done.
Norton begrudgingly agrees at last, and the two of them finally sit down to talk. He is uncooperative with her and gives her super vague, short and snarky answers to her inquiries. After hours of this, Alice finally has enough. "Please, Norton! I'm begging you!" "What you want me to do?" "Give me more to work with, for a start." "That's all I've got." "I don't believe that for a second. There's more to your story. The records-" "Then use those! Everything you need to know is already there." "Firstly, the records don't have the full picture. Secondly, you're the one who needs to remember, not me. That's why I need you to walk me through-" "You don't need anything!" "... I'm trying to help you. Why won't you let me?" "I never want your help to begin with!" "This isn't only about you, Norton. Everyone's affected by this entangled mess. Take some responsibility, please. I know this is hard for you. I want to understand, I really do. But you have to help me to do so." "..." "Maybe I'm not the right person for this, after all."
Alice would then leave Norton alone while the others berate him for ruining their chance of getting out of this place. He acts like he doesn't care, but deep down he feels really bad about it all. He wanted her off his back, and now that he finally got what he wanted, he wasn't so sure anymore. Especially seeing Alice's spirit so broken. While he tries to think of a way to rectify things, he finds Alice one night, sitting in the parlor in her night gown and staring out the window. She doesn't acknowledge him as he hesitantly approaches her and sits down next to her. Before he manages to say anything, she begins to share a personal memory with him without quite knowing why. Maybe it is her lack of sleep? Or her feeling of hopelessness. The memory is about how she was unable to help her parents when she was young, and that she thinks she is the reason why they died. She spent all her life as a journalist trying to help others in order to repent for this. But it looks like she is still as useless and unable to help others, in her words.
Norton listens intently and starts reflecting more over Alice and the time spent with her. He realises that she is nothing like what he thought she was. She might be just as broken as the rest of them, but she has a heart of gold, and she is honest and genuine; a breed of people he was not used to having around in his life and death. He reassures her that she is nothing of what she said she was, and that he was wrong about her. Slowly he opens up as well. Deep down he actually wants help, but is afraid to face it. She in turn reassures him that he doesn't have to face it alone and that she will help in every way she can. He just needs to be open for it.
They agree to try again; really try this time. But for the rest of the night, they just talk about everything and nothing. They talk until Alice falls asleep on the sofa. Norton stays with her for a while longer, studying her features in silence. He wished he could drape a blanket over her so she wouldn't be cold. He then beats himself up for even entertaining the idea that she is pretty. Eventually he leaves her in peace, but doesn't stray far away. They both feel better after this, and from there on out, their bond becomes stronger slowly over time.
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worth-this-and-more · 1 day ago
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it finally happened . . . i had a dream of oathbound
now, i am at my grandparent's house and my sleep has been very . . . interesting. so lo and behold this was something wild
spoiler warning just in case [spoilers for legendborn and bloodmarked, read at your own caution ;)]
now events in order;
there was some sort of a program going on
my friends were there, i don't remember exactly who but they all knew me and i knew them
this event was at school sort of building we were all in the corridors
i was sitting on the balcony with my legs flung onto it
i look at a tree and i say "woow bree would climb that"
someone tells me oathbound is released
i am gripped with a sudden fear
"tf you mean by that" i am handed an annotated copy of oathbound and I'm so furious you are so late they even had the time to draw hearts on bree sel nick's names
somehow my subconscious brain decided that book is going to be bree pov + third person pov, interesting
the sentence was something like "...no longer motionless. the wisps of aether still followed her but her eyes are now swirling silver. alice is awake." then the pretty legendborn divider and then "alice pulled out the gauntlets gillian gifted to her on the plane, trying to replicate them the way William taught bree to." (this is not exactly what it could've said and it's probably just me projecting but do you see the vision.)
i flipped through pages to find annotations
for nick they wrote "he is awakened" "he has asked the order to bring every member of the table together before taking any decision" "that is the law" (which now that i think of it may or may not be possible. but like okay cool theory ig.)
i flipped more pages and natasia was there and she said no to something and then i was fucking terrified so i went back to the first page
after this my dream has turned into something i do not think i should share so this is all ig??
this was wierd. i might put this in my "subconscious oathbound predictions" folder. but hey at least i had a legendborn dream that i remember.
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fizziepopangel · 1 day ago
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A Fizziepop Take: Let’s talk about the beginning of the end and what the last few episodes might mean for the next chapter of Stolitz
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Well hello, my lovely peoples! I feel like I haven’t written a Fizziepop Take in a good minute, and I know I'm putting my two cents in a lil late, but I am back and so ready to talk about everything that we’ve seen in the last few episodes because it has been wild…. So, you know the drill, let’s get into it.
So, if we wanna talk about the beginning of the end, we need to be honest with ourselves; the real beginning of the end of one of the fandom’s most beloved ships started back with the incident at Ozzie’s. If you've followed my takes for a while, you know I talk about this night a lot, but that is because this was a real turning point for the couple; the relationship has been strained ever since Blitz felt what he felt that night when Stolas pulled away from him in public when all eyes were on them. Ever since that exact moment, Blitz felt like he was being used and taken advantage of, and despite things going back to a kind of normal for them, those feelings just ended up festering and since our loveable little horse-loving imp doesn’t have a lot of healthy ways to process things and has already had it imbedded in his brain that he ain’t shit, I don’t think he ever fully processed what that night meant from any other angle than “he’s embarrassed to be seen with me”. What does this have to do with how things ended? I’m so glad you’ve asked! Since Blitz never fully processed the events of that night and therefore was only ever able to see it as a royal being embarrassed to be seen on a date with a lowly imp, Blitz didn’t get to see the sweeter side of being gifted an Asmodean Crystal by Stolas in “The Full Moon”. To Blitz, the crystal was more of a “you’re being let go” type of thing because Stolas essentially terminated their contract and since they had never talked about their relationship being anything but contractual, Blitz had no reason to believe that this was really anything but Stolas telling him that he was no longer needed by him.
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Now, we as the audience know what the real intention behind the crystal was, and I think Stolas put it beautifully when he tried to explain it to Blitz when he gifted him the crystal….. but I don’t think that words really do much for Blitz in most instances, let alone in the long term. Blitz is more of an “actions speak louder than words” type of imp, but here’s the thing about that: for this saying to be true, actions must be consistent. Because, yes, actions do speak louder than words, but if that action is only done here and there, it doesn’t always show what it should. In terms of the end of Stolitz as we know it, Stolas isn’t the only one who’s actions matter, and unfortunately, I’m not talking about just Blitz’s actions. Being that Blitz has been abused (probably way more than we’ve even seen), those actions matter. Abuse of any sort does a lot more damage to the victim than we sometimes realize, and because of that, it can do a lot of damage in how a person looks at things like relationships and love…. And given the transactional nature of their relationship, and the fact that Stolas hadn’t consistently been a genuine partner to Blitz outside of the bedroom, his reaction to the crystal honestly makes a lot of sense. First, he treats it like an elaborate role play, because sex is the only love language he’s consistently known in their relationship, then when he realizes that it’s a serious conversation, he’s pissed rather than grateful…. Is his anger perhaps a little misplaced? Probably, but the feelings are all real. Blitz does feel used and discarded by Stolas, something he’s obviously felt before since we see in his bad trip in "Truth Seekers" that he feels very much chained to the prince by the design of their relationship, and the fact that Stolas doesn't give him much time to really sit with what’s just happened between them after handing him an out of their relationship doesn’t help…. And then we see the panic when Blitz realizes that unlike what he’s used to, Stolas isn’t going to match his anger, he’s just going to remove himself from the situation and let that be the end of it….
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This brings us to the events of “Apology Tour”. I actually really loved this episode despite the fact that my favorite couple literally just called it quits the episode before. We see the aftermath of what happened the night of the full moon, and we see the way both men start to grieve the relationship they had in their own ways, which I would argue is the true end of the relationship since this is where we see both men really accepting that they are no longer a thing the way they were before. We see Stolas taking all his eggs out of the Blitz basket and actually letting himself be happy with someone else, even if that happy is only gonna be for the night… And we see Blitz realizing that he not only truly loved Stolas more than he had wanted to admit, but we see him start trying to let go of what he had with the man despite the point of the episode being that he hadn’t really been ready to in the beginning…. Unfortunately, Blitz letting go leads to his spiral which we see in “Ghostfuckers”, and we see him get himself into a rough spot with his little found family; working Loona into exhaustion burning owl figurines as a form of therapy, not paying M&M while also fucking away all of I.M.P’s money, and using the job they get in this episode as a chance to just roleplay as someone who wasn’t him and therefore wasn’t going through what he was…Really, Blitz did go into a deep, rather dark place, and I suspect that he might be there for a while when it comes to love, which leads us to the big question….
What does this all mean for the fan favorite ship? Will Stolitz really be endgame if we just watched them break up the way they did? 
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If you ask me, a humble Tumbr blogger who probably cares way too much about fictional demons, I honestly don’t think this hiatus will really affect the ship too negatively. The time apart may be just what Stolas and Blitz need. Both of these men have trauma they need to start working through individually, and while having a support system can be a helluva help when you’re reopening old wounds to try to get them to heal properly (hehe, see what i did there?), I don’t think either of them is really in a place emotionally to be the best support they can be for the other while they both individually try to do that. Stolas also needs time to learn who he is as a person considering he went from being a baby prince to being engaged, then straight from being engaged to being married, then married with a kid, and directly after that, he jumped into bed with Blitz and just proceeded to place everything he had in that "relationship"… He never really considered anything outside of loveless marriage with an abusive cunt or amazing sex and *hopefully* love with an old childhood “friend”. I think he needs some time to be alone and live just for himself as much as he can as a Goetia, and I don’t think he could have done that with Blitz right now, at least not fully. Vivzie is a smart woman, and she does a lot of things in her shows very intentionally, so I do think that she is setting the pair up for a happier, healthier relationship down the line and I think once they come together again and have more experiences apart from each other, we’re probably gonna get a sort of happy ending for the pair, or at least the start of a new beginning for them.
I’d love to hear what everyone else thinks, because as you all know, this is just a simple Fizziepop Take and anything can happen in the Helluverse, but my take definitely makes me excited for the next episode because I for one cannot wait to see what Vivzie has in store for us next.
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esmeriandreamer · 2 days ago
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Okay, this post made me think a lot about characterisation in Epic, so I hope you don't mind me putting in my two cents and rambling a bit.
First thing I feel like a lot of people in the fandom forget; these characters are all flawed, they each have their good sides and bad sides, and that is GOOD writing.
Examples;
Eurylochus is strongminded, but also very prone to skepticism, to the point that he loses trust in his captain and dooms them all in 'Mutiny'.
Polites is an optimist, but prone to being too trusting, which nearly makes him and Ody eat lotus fruit, and also makes his final thought before being crushed by a cyclops be "Greet the world with open arms".
Circe is a caring and powerful queen, but past trauma is clearly making her see all men the same way and making rash choices like turning the crew into pigs, to avoid the possiblity that her nymphs and her would be killed/violated by them.
Poseidon has his reasons to hate Odysseus, he blinded his son and basically gave him the middle finger after all, but this god waited near Ithica's coast doing practically nothing for YEARS because he had beef with one (1) mortal.
And of course, Odysseus is a clever man, but he is driven by emotions (or lack thereof), and he'd destroy anything and anyone in his path to his goal, no matter the terrible cost.
Calypso is very much the same, at least in this version of the story. What she did isn't right of course, but like she says in NSFLY, she has been alone for a hundred/hundreds of years, so of course she'd practically imprint on the first person she's seen in so many years. Doesn't make her actions right, it just explains them. She is flawed, like any other character in this musical.
But I think there is one key reason why so many people are hating her so intensely. The fanworks. Now, I am not saying that fanfic authors are to blame, but if you look at it objectively, there are clear differences between Calypso in Epic and Calypso in Epic fanfic.
Calypso in the musical is a clingy and overbearing goddess, but the worst she canonically does is:
Claim Odysseus is now hers
Emotionally manipulating him by a; using phrases from his loved ones while he's having a mental breakdown, and b; saying that while she probably came on too strong, she's not sorry for loving him.
That's.. basically all that she does in the songs. Even the whole "you can't leave" thing is because there's a spell/magic keeping them BOTH stuck in paradise, making the island stay unknown. Of course, things are implied, but it's never explicitly stated that she does anything worse than basically love-bomb Ody for 7 years.
Now, fanartists have of course taken these implications and ran wild with them. Which is exactly what fanfiction is about, I fully support taking a thread of story and weaving a new one with it. But it has introduced some concepts that just.. aren't canon to Jay's story.
In the Epic canon, it's never stated that Calypso rapes Odysseus. It's never stated that she does any weird magic things to have her way with him, or keep him from leaving her. That is only a thing in the fanfictions I've seen, and something I've included in my own private writing too.
Calypso is manipulative, yes, but she isn't the same evil temptress from Homer's story. She's just a wellwritten antagonist character. A character the audience is expected to dislike, as she keeps the protaganist from going home, and yet, she still manages to tug at your heartstrings.
And that is a GOOD THING in storytelling. Flawed heroes, sympathetic villians, unreliable narrators, those make stories compelling. You're technically not supposed to look at any character and either love them unconditionally or hate them with all your being. Nuance is so, SO important while interacting with stories.
Calypso, Nuance and Misogyny
Whoop-dee-scoop I'm mad at people on TikTok again. Yippee.
I love Not Sorry For Loving You. It does so much for Calypso's characterization in this musical. And I'm tired of seeing people blatantly ignoring that.
"This is emotional manipulation!!" "She's a narcissist!" "She's not actually apologizing to Ody!"
Y'all are fucking insufferable (/lh). Yes, what Calypso did to Odysseus is bad. I am not going to say it isn't. Forcing a man to be with you is bad. But a character doing bad things doesn't mean that you can brush off everything she says under "bad woman bad".
Here's the second verse of NSFLY (via LyricFind on Google)
Let me speak I spent my whole life here Was cast away when I was young Alone for a hundred years I had no friends but the sky and sun So when you washed ashore I thought for sure that you were my dream come true I thought I knew
This contextualizes her actions. Not excuses, but explains why she did what she did.
Calypso was banished to her island because she's Atlas' daughter and not much else from what I've gathered. And she's telling the audience that she's spent more or less her entire life completely alone. Of-fucking-course she's gonna be overly/unhealthily attached to the first other person she's seen in the last hundred years or so. She finally has someone to talk to. And ignoring that nuance is not fair to her character.
There's also the simple truth that Homer didn't write EPIC. He wrote The Odyssey, which EPIC is based on, but Jorge's the one that actually wrote EPIC, meaning that this is Jorge's version of Calypso, which is clearly more humanized/sympathetic than Homer's.
Speaking of the original Odyssey, if you've gotten this far you might be wondering why I put misogyny in the title. The answer's simple:
Homer was a misogynist. So were most all men in Ancient Greece.
As I'm sure a good chunk of people in this fandom know, Ancient Greece… wasn't kind to their women. When one of the healthiest marriages in the mythos starts with the woman being kidnapped, it's hard to argue anything else. And surprise to no one, this also affected the written versions of the myths, including Homer's works.
The original Calypso is no exception. She's an evil temptress who's only motive for being evil is being rejected sexually. There was nothing else to her character. In fact, every woman in Greco-Roman mythology is either "evil typically temptress mwah-ha-ha" or "I have absolutely no agency whatsoever"
On the flip-side, the version of Calypso that Jorge's written is more three-dimensional than that (well, as much as she can be with only two songs). So effectively, in brushing off the context given to her character because "well she's evil so…" is in my humble opinion, reinforcing the misogyny that was woven into her that modern retellings are trying to remove from her character.
Anyway, it's almost midnight. I'm tired. Thanks for reading to the end, and goodnight.
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i-am-church-the-cat · 7 months ago
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I didn’t want to hijack the person’s post bc I don’t care what they think but I am a defensive bitch so we’re talking about this
Logan and Oscar met when they were 13/14. The next year they were on the same karting team together but didn’t race each other directly. This would be the last time they don’t race each other until 2019 when Logan moved up to F3 and Oscar was still in Formula Renault. They had a championship battle in F4 and F3, they were teammates in 2020, they haven’t raced each other since then which has been the biggest gap since they’ve known each other.
That still doesn’t mean they’re friends though. You know what does? Them literally saying they are.
Oscar saying “I’m quite close with Logan Sargeant” on that podcast. The Miami GP 2023 post. Them playing paddle together. Logan in that interview where they asked about “Loscar.” Now the podcast episode.
They aren’t forced to be around each other, if anything they’re so busy they don’t have time to hang out, yet they still seek each other out when they have the opportunity. Obviously we don’t know anything about their personal lives but at the very least we know they’re friends?? Not brocedes level of friends, maybe lestappen level of friends cause I don’t think they’re actual friends either, definitely not galex level of friends but that can also be attributed to the fact they don’t talk about themselves a lot, compared to Alex or George who post everything about their lives.
Like, have you ever seen them interact? They’re chilling they’re casual but they are friends. Whatever you think about their dynamic they are at least that.
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aerithisms · 6 months ago
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rotating the pub scene from 73 yards in my mind i think there is so much being said there about wales and welsh/english tension that is so interesting and is going so under discussed
#blahs#dw#dw spoilers#the whole thing about castles in wales being english torture centres. much to unpack#i think it's easy for most viewers to watch it and see that the characters are taking the piss and write it off#but what's interesting about it is i think rtd is basing that on real exaggerations of oppression by welsh people#most castles in wales WERE built by the english and they WERE designed to oppress the welsh. except that was like 800 years ago#and some people use this as an example of welsh oppression /now/ when it's like. not relevant to modern wales really#and 'torture chambers' is a wild exaggeration that dangerously tries to compare wales to much more recent human rights violations#i think rtd is trying to caution against a romanticised or sensationalised narrative of old wales that certain welsh nationalists have#this is also what he's doing with roger ap gwilliam#i keep seeing people say his character is 'just nukes' and i'm not gonna pretend it's The most complex politics ever#but it's also not just nukes. it's about specific political tensions and attitudes in wales.#rtd's viewpoint reminds me a lot of my dad#my dad's a proud welshman he's a native speaker he grew up in a welsh speaking community#but he doesn't really care about old welsh history about llewelyn ap gruffydd or owain glyndwr or anything like that#he doesn't see it as relevant. to him what's important is modern wales and the tensions of the 20th century#i'd wager rtd probably feels the same#and what with doctor who being produced in wales being rtd's doing i think he's enthusiastic about collaborating with england#rather than being like. isolationist about it. (that's the wrong word but i can't think of a better one)#WHICH INCIDENTALLY ties the political strand of the episode with the personal strand about ruby#who is also dealing with a self-fulfilling sense of isolation#anyway i think this episode is about wales in a very significant way. we need more welsh people writing think pieces about it#honest to god i don't think any analysis of it that doesn't talk about its welshness is quite Getting It
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jonny-b-meowborn · 1 year ago
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Ohhhh god I got the motel scene everyone stay calm <- will never have a normal reaction to this scene
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nylongenesis · 5 months ago
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Im just rambling my heart out rn bc im like this but listen hear me out. I think Tim is aromantic. hot take I know but as an aro person maybe its just me but I see a lot of myself in his flirty chatter and playful gestures. In my head he does it as affection, as a way to stretch his wings and engage in a bit of fun banter, and of course, to get what he needs. I inherently see his tendency to draw the eye of people in order to obtain information as a gesture rather detached from the inherent concept of romanticism. it displays a nature in which one understands romance and appeal on a surface level, but does not feel it themselves. I think he likes traditionally romantic stuff. He calls himself a hopeless romantic. He kisses his friends on the cheeks and he treats Sasha as a lover would treat their spouse but they are not dating and both of them know this. He spends passionate nights with people and leaves feeling satisfied. But if you confessed romantic interest in him he would give you a horrifically awkward, apologetic look and let you down easy. I think he was devastated by the realization in his youth. I think beneath all his affection and smiles and toying remarks he knows he will never truly be able to have the romantic relationship he always dreamed of having, because what he desires simply does not exist. I think he indulges in the little things- passing glances, playful flirts, romantic comedies, nights on the town, to taste what he cannot have- and even moreso, to enjoy what he *can* have. To enjoy the fact he can do so comfortably, openly, without concern for what it may look like or if it's really romantic or not. Perhaps he has grown to be happy with the way he lives. Perhaps he is content to be in his lovely queerplatonic relationship. Perhaps he distantly wishes he could be a better partner because he knows he will never meet the standard. I think he loves so strongly, so powerfully, that it simply is not something that could fall into romance. It just isn't. But he loves all the same. He loves so passionately, like a fire, but it is not romance. it is simply love. Tl;dr personal hc is that tim is romance-positive aro (unless it comes to romance aimed at him) and is bisexual. Bc we need more alloaro rep. and more romance-positive aro rep. And i see myself in him.
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iliveinprocrasti-nationn · 2 years ago
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i’m so frustrated with people’s lack of common sense about wildlife. if you’re interacting with wildlife, you’re not having your disney princess moment. you’re not forming a magical bond. that’s a wild animal who is potentially terrified; maybe it’s curious if it’s young enough, but that just means you should minimise interactions as much as possible to make sure that animal lives a normal life. if your kid comes in holding a wild animal, don’t pick up your fucking phone to videotape it. bring the animal back outside and educate your kid to leave animals alone. you know what happens when you take in wildlife as a “pet”? either you keep it and do damage because even though it’s “tame” it’s a wild animal who is in no way meant to live in that setting unless it’s being kept by a trained and licensed rehabber who knows the housing and feeding requirements (and even then i’ve seen some who are keeping animals irresponsibility), or it ends up at a wildlife rehab when you inevitably harm it enough that you don’t know what to do, or when no vets see you, or when the animal becomes too aggressive for you to handle. and then we either figure out how to rehabilitate an animal whose temperament and/or body you have massively damaged or we euthanise it because the damage is too extensive. start treating wildlife like wild animals rather than a dog or cat. they’re not pets, they’re not domesticated, leave them alone and let them live happy lives as they’re supposed to.
#saw a video of someone’s kid bringing in a baby raccoon and holding it to her chest. what the FUCK are you thinking#‘it’s mine now it’s my pet’ and everyone in the comments is going ‘you heard her that’s her pet now’. fuck all the way off#not only does that harm the animal but that makes it very possible for animals to spread diseases to you or your actual pets#not to mention parasites and fleas#there was one the other day of someone getting a rabbit out of a skate park which is good thanks for helping it. but then the person spent#another 5 or 10 minutes interacting with it and petting it. that’s not a pet store bunny that’s a wild animal and it’s absolutely terrified#im not saying learn body language and temperament and shit for a bunch of different animals im saying have some common sense and leave#wildlife alone. look but don’t touch. if an animal looks to be in distress then contact a local wildlife rehab or any rehab at all and ask#for advice. if there’s a rehab near you then see if you can bring the animal in#if you try to do that shit yourself you can do irreparable damage#it’s all fun and games and ‘oh im keeping it as a pet’ until the animal is malformed and has broken bones and infected wounds or is so#aggressive that it’s taking chunks out of people with no warning#‘this wild animal andomly attacked someone for no reason!’ you see how it’s overweight? people have probably been feeding it and when that#person didn’t have food it jumped on them#someone’s gonna do this shit with a ‘sick bird they plan to nurse back to health’ and get fucking bird flu#im just tired i haven’t been working with wildlife for a year and am going to study wildlife and work with them for the rest of my life for#this shit to keep happening. i know it will but im just tired of seeing it over and over again#my post#y’all can rb if you want im just pissed and on my soapbox
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mutalune · 5 months ago
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hey siri how do I stop feeling gutwrenchingly anxious in the guilt way for using the treatment methods available to me to not be in constant misery
#starlight personal#it’s very bizarre to have my life going objectively well - work is good! personal life is good! family is good!#and still be very mentally ill and feel like I’m faking it even though I know damn well I ain’t scream-sobbing every couple of days alone in#my apartment for attention because What Attention??? my cat????? Bug is never moved by my tears she cares only for string and wires#like I know that cannabis has been immensely helpful to getting me to fucking sleep on a regular schedule and that’s integral to -#my functioning and I know that having emergency klonopin in the event of a total breakout is helpful#and I KNOW that my PMDD and depression and anxiety are very treatment resistant and ketamine is the only thing that’s provided any -#meaningful relief and logically I know I’m not abusing any of these#I’m getting a promotion at work I still go out to see friends regularly I have hobbies I have a girlfriend (??? Wild right)#like clearly these things are working because i’m better now than i was for years leading up to now#SO LIKE. DON’T STOP USING THE THINGS THAT HELP. LOGICALLY THIS MEANS THESE ARE GOOD FOR ME#I always roll my eyes when ppl go off their meds b/c they’re feeling better like babes that’s what the meds are meant to do#if you stop taking them you stop feeling better - but it’s REALLY HARD to get past the cultural conditioning#the feeling that ‘but I can white knuckle my way through this I can force myself to live without’ like WHY BITCH#WE DON’T HAVE TO LIVE WITHOUT#AND ALSO. WE’RE STILL GENERALLY MISERABLE BRO. EVEN WITH OUR LIFE IN A BETTER PLACE!!!#DO YOU NOT THINK THIS MEANS THAT WE SHOULD USE WHAT WE KNOW WORKS TO BE LESS MISERABLE#basically it’s really hard to not feel like a loser when the only things that help are ‘fun’ drugs like weed and psychedelics#I feel like I’m being a hedonistic reprobate which 1) is actually kinda cool now that I wrote it out#2) @ myself were not a good enough liar-faker that every medical professional we see wouldn’t pick up on that if that was our motivation#time to remind myself that it’s arrogant to think I could trick many trained professionals without actively trying tbh#that generally helps me get out of my self-pitying ‘ohhhhh I’m awful and lazy and bad and abusing substances’ spiral#to be very mentally ill on main it is weirdly reassuring to be like ‘just as my fanon interpretation of obi wan kinda hates himself but is -#practical enough to take care of himself even when it makes him cringe and want to scratch his face off; I too am aware that self-care is -#radical and punk and In Fact Necessary to beat back the dark and live in the light with hope so yes even though I doubt and -#feel squiggly and guilty about it I’m not going to NOT prioritize my health and well-being b/c self-hatred and self-denial benefits no one’#thank you inner obi wan i love projecting my issues onto you mwah mwah mwah smooches for my favorite boy!!!!!#and smooches for me I’m going to be proud of myself gosh darn it even if I have to fake it at first#see I wouldn’t be able to be nice to myself like this if I hadn’t been doing ketamine treatment for a year IT WORKS BRO KEEP IT UP#SCHEDULE THE DAMN APPOINTMENT AND CLEAN YOUR BONG
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