#optomize
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I exist. And for today. That certainty. Is enough.
#trans girl#transfem#shit post#shitpost#trans#dissasociation#depersonalization#derealization#trauma#childhood trauma#mental illnsss#optomism
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craigs existence doesn't JUST revolve around tweek yknow.... it also revolves around me accidentally letting him get eaten by the racist tentacle monster in TFBW three times.
#THE FIRST TIME IT HAPPENED I WAS TRAUMATIZED#I WAS LIKE 'there's one less fucker on the board than usua- WHERES CRAIG?!?!'#CRAIG NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO#south park#tfbw#craig tucker#i think there's a better character to optomize that battle but i stick with craig everytime out of tradition
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its officially winter break which means i need to fall into a 2 week hole of madly rereading one (1) fandom content and hitting post limit on tumblr about it. it’s been even between the main 3 all year so u choose tumblr -
#highkey most likely throam or aftg but the homestuck itch has been there for some time#this is a curate ur dash moment bc i will go insane#i still technically have 3 more animorphs books to read to be done but i’ve accepted thats not happening#also i was spending my time in optom school trying to get out of the academic annual calendar into the typical jan-dec annual calendar#but now i am clearly staying in academia so this time of year will always be The Middle to me#poll#mine.#jm
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hi sorry for the lack of literally anything ive been buried in Sandrock as you can imagine and i still havent unlocked the new Fang stuff and please do not spoil me i wanna be surprised and have the journey and then cry and make it into a self-indulgent comic!!!!! but anyways i wanted to get this out in the meantime before i go back into my cave to game!!!! this is (meant to be) a bridge between Push Forward and Cheery Picnic! so another prequel, i think next i'll go back to the main timeline (aka pick up where i left off after Painful Memory) cause im sure people would like the story and whatnot to actually continue and i do too!!! i just wanted to add some extra meat to early stuff i skipped over ANYWAYS ENJOY YAYYYY
#my time at sandrock#mtas oc#mtas builder#mtas fang#mtas x#mtas coco#mtas arvio#mtas a buncha people actually#sorry for the wildly differing shading here#as you can see i got experimental HAHAHA#trying to optomize my comic process to make it faster and easier but some pages wound up looking goofy/lazy oops#also experimented with spread/split pages#vani candy art#comic#fancomic#silly doodles#oc x canon#swans treasure
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why did our eye. doctor. place. whatever the fuck it's called. note down that we have high pressure in our eyes and 'ohhhh it might be glaucoma!! we should do tests!!' but not the fact that they confirmed it was not, in fact, glaucoma and instead just weirdly thick cornea
their pressure tests are awful by the way
#do you think oregon has better eye doctors#optome...something like that#ae can't remember what they're called :[
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I’ve fallen in love with a patient and now I’m being peer pressured to add him on Facebook 😅
#I’m not the optom so yes this is legal 😂#imagine having a crush at my big age#embarrassing#but I’ve also never been so immediately obsessed with someone since my ex 😂🤡#I should just do it!#it’s 2024 and I’m a strong independent woman!
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there are more than 130 people booked to come to the course tomorrow plus walkups and its supposed to be in the upper 90s and low 100s all day PLUS HUMIDITY and im working a double
#i might just kill myself#that sounds like hell#miserable just thinking about it#its going to be so bad#if one more person hits me with some stupid fucking optomism when i complain about my job i might just kill them#im in such a bad mood#there was a single family alone on the course for the entire last hour#how do you not feel bad making us stay#its hot and miserable and we are all being slow cooked#youre complainig about the heat and saying it must suck for us#yea if fucking does leave so i can go home#i hate my job#i want to cry and sleep forever and just stop#but i have a double tomorrow and friday and saturday and sunday and wednesday and thursday#cant wait to get home 8 hours before i need to get up for the next 9 hour shift
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You’re not alone. Finding a job has been hard for me as well. A lot of younger people are talking about it online as well. And it scares me because these were the easy jobs to get people were talking about. So if I can’t get hired at McDonald’s, then what happens when I try to get a bigger job?😭 Are we cooked?
I'm starting to feel like the answer is yes
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im fucking angry right now and you know WHAT?? you know fucking WHAT?? if they dont want me to be happy then being happy is an act of SPITE AND I AM A SPITEFUL BITCH. I AM GOING TO TAKE CARE OF MYSELF I AM GOING TO LOVE MYSELF EVEN IF YOU CANT. FUCK YOU. AND YOU GET TO WATCH MY JOY FROM THE SIDE KNOWING YOU COULDVE TAKEN PART IF YOU TRIED TO CARE.
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The effects of Kim Kardashian on the perception of brown people's race needs to be studied because I just had my Turkish uber driver clock me as Indian at 7.48 am while I was wearing a kn95 mask. Meanwhile my coworker who I worked with for 3 straight years thought i was Southern European. And she was Italian?
#WHAT#i also have a white first name so like??? it wasnt that#unless hes very well versed in uncommon indian last names its the only explanation#and it was unprompted too i was like so haha have a busy shift so far#and he was like INDIAN 😃🫵 - WHAT PART?#its so funny too cause whenever i tell the coworker story everyones like ehhh i guess you look kind of ambiguous to non-europeans#and then i drop the italian bomb in the chat and theyre like oh wait WHAT#and we're all as confused as each other again#then again we did work at an optom so maybe the simplest explanation is the actual one: she had terrible eyesoght
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I made of her pieces.
Threads that remain.
Woven from nostalgia’s sand.
Stolen by pain.
I am not her.
She didn’t get to be.
But through my eyes.
Lives her memory.
I am woven of her.
I am woven of dreams.
All the hollow shell.
Wished it could be.
I am alive.
I am me.
I’m just sad.
A world so bright.
She’ll never get to see.
#trans girl#transfem#poem#poetry#healing#mental illnsss#depersonalization#dissasociation#derealization#sense of self#optomism#philosophy#trans
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liushen for the ask game? or bingliushen if u have that already
LiuShen yes. Sorry I'm new so idk whether there's a specific shen usually attributed to this ship name. I'm assuming shen yuan though??? (Either Shen Yuan or Shen Jiu honestly.... I just love liu qingge so like.... I'm gonna be Favorable to any ship with him in it. )
Liu qingge & shen yuan my preferred dynamic is canon man .... stupid bricks for brains jock realizes he has feelings after his prickly, nerdy senior gives him the tiniest scrap of affection, but that nerd is even denser than Liu qingge so neither of them notice.
Man I love unrequited ships so much...... like. Guard dog Liu qingge would throw his life away for this oblivious emotional black hole of a man who gets gold in the mental gymnastics for how far back he has to bend to justify his first thought upon seeing the war God being "[a face] as beautiful as a fine woman's" ((what the fuck shen yuan)) like....... fuckin sucks that it takes literally trying to merge realms together for shen yuan to realise his feelings Liu qingge never had a chance!!! :(
I love the Concept of Liu qingge forever on the cusp of realizing he loves this fool of a man but just. Never thinking about it. For whatever reason. Just. What would it matter anyways, no need to put effort into that when he could track down a massive beast and fight that instead, and if shen qingqiu could use some of the spare parts, well. That's just a bonus.
Anyways. I think they'd also be cute together I just love angst ahaha.
I think a fun AU for LiuShen would be... ugh I'm torn. Witcher au though. Liu Qingge as the Witcher in question but he just follows scholar Shen Qingqiu around because Shen Qingqiu wants to record a bestiary from life and Liu Qingge is like. Yes. Completely normal behavior.
But also.... maybe a werewolf au where Shen Yuan finds an abnormally large dog in a huge bit of trouble and jumps in to help... accidentally jumping into an urban fantasy magical realism underworld of supernatural creatures and making himself a target of powerful enemies. The big dog turns out to be a werewolf who is (of course) liu qingge who ends up staying close to shen yuan's side to pay him back and also protect him.
I think either would work well with them haha, plenty of opportunity for them to be dense about each other.
#shipping ask game#svsss#i guess haha#i'll draw a picture for one of the aus tomorrow sleepy now.#also! anon!!#youre full of optomism... my ask box is bare.#binghe isnt my favorite character but liubingshen is cute#i like liubing rivalry a lot#really something about liu being The Best and then meeting The Actual Best#and them both being so [smashes two rocks together] about it
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I know canon wants me to belive Obito was Kushina’s favorite
But i instead choose to belive that Obito or Rin is Minato’s favorite and Kakashi is Kushina’s favorite
#listen LISTEN#i know some people think Kakashi is Minato’s fav#but a core memory for Kakashi is ‘Minato-sensei’s disappointed look’ and i think that means Minato was tired of Kakashi#he wanted to help but he had no idea how because he was a kid being given a kid to train and he had no idea what he was doing.#i think Minato liked Obito’s optomism and Rin’s kindness and determination to get her team mates to work together#but he was tired of Kakashi and lost with no idea what to do to help#but Kakashi was also his only surviving student so of course he still cared about him
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in many ways working night shift sucks but at least im not workimf two jobs
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#MFY#Textile#Textiles#Tekstil#Wholesale#Toptan#Optom#Oптовая#Knitwear#Трикотаж#Triko#Sweater#Свитер#Kazak
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