#optimism in hospitals

[bklynmusicnerd]

Heard the preview shows Spencer pissing Trina off again with his terrible life choices, and I have to say, for once, I'm grateful to Spencer's stupid life choices.

All of this arguing will be a good warmup for Trina's real showdown next week with her real nemesis, Cyrus.

[sidewalkchemistry]

I wish I knew it while I was in school, but fruit are the best study snacks. When I'm eating just pure fruit, my thoughts come through so much clearer. I don't feel like I'm busting my brain and running low on energy. I feel so powered up and inquisitive.

[brainrotallthewaydown1312]

i am not picky. i will sleep on the floor as long as you give me a pillow and a blanket. in a pinch I'll be okay with just a blanket. anything more is a luxury. you're already letting me stay in your home, that is so nice and not necessary. any accomodations you make for me are the extra mile at that point.

i understand that I am in the minority here. but I've had to couch surf to get away from my abusive family and I lived on a friend's couch for the whole pandemic as a guest and those taught me one thing. hospitality goes in both directions. as a host you should make your best efforts to make a guest physically and socially comfortable, but as a guest you should always be patient and understanding with the available accommodations. if that's a guest room, that's great. if it's a couch, that works. if your on the floor of a closet with a cover lead duvet, you can make it work. if you're the host and a couch or guest room is available or you are comfortable sharing your bed, maybe save the closet floor for when you are absolutely out of space otherwise. it goes both ways and as long as both people come to an agreement about arrangements and what makes sense, that is what matters

*minimum level of comfort = the bare minimum you excpect to get and if they can't provide this, you'd consider not staying over or would be unhappy about it. more is always appreciated but less is a no-go for you.

[xenmagmarketing]

Digital Advertising Companies in India: Transforming the Future of Marketing

In the digital age, businesses are rapidly evolving to meet the demands of an online-first audience. With India's internet penetration growing exponentially, digital advertising has become the cornerstone of modern marketing strategies. From startups to multinational corporations, everyone is leveraging digital advertising to maximize reach, engagement, and ROI. If you're searching for a comprehensive guide to digital advertising companies in India, you’ve come to the right place. At XENMAG, we explore the dynamic landscape of digital advertising and how the right agency can transform your business.

The Growth of Digital Advertising in India

India’s digital revolution has led to an unparalleled boom in online advertising. Factors contributing to this growth include:

Increased Internet Penetration: With over 700 million internet users, India is one of the largest online markets globally.

Affordable Smartphones: The proliferation of budget-friendly smartphones has made digital content accessible to even rural areas.

Social Media Engagement: Platforms like Instagram, Facebook, and YouTube are becoming prime advertising hubs.

Government Initiatives: Campaigns like Digital India have encouraged businesses to embrace online platforms.

The digital advertising industry in India is projected to grow at a compound annual growth rate (CAGR) of over 14% by 2025. This highlights the importance of partnering with innovative digital advertising companies to stay competitive.

Why Choose a Digital Advertising Company?

A professional digital advertising agency can:

Maximize ROI: Agencies optimize ad spend to ensure maximum returns.

Leverage Expertise: Professionals use advanced tools and strategies for precision targeting.

Stay Updated: They adapt quickly to ever-changing digital trends.

Save Time: Outsourcing marketing efforts allows businesses to focus on their core operations.

Top Services Offered by Digital Advertising Companies in India

Search Engine Optimization (SEO) SEO ensures your website ranks high on search engine results, driving organic traffic. With services like keyword optimization, on-page SEO, and backlink strategies, agencies improve visibility.

Pay-Per-Click (PPC) Advertising PPC campaigns deliver instant results. Google Ads, Facebook Ads, and Instagram promotions are popular formats.

Social Media Marketing (SMM) Companies create targeted campaigns on platforms like LinkedIn, Instagram, and Twitter to engage audiences and build brand loyalty.

Content Marketing Quality content is the backbone of digital campaigns. Agencies offer blog writing, video creation, and infographics that resonate with audiences.

Email Marketing Personalized email campaigns help nurture leads and retain customers.

Web Development and Design A user-friendly, aesthetically pleasing website is crucial for a strong digital presence.

Analytics and Reporting Data-driven insights ensure campaigns are continually optimized for better performance.

Leading Digital Advertising Companies in India

1. XENMAG : Your Digital Growth Partner

At XENMAG, we specialize in providing holistic digital marketing solutions tailored to your business needs. Whether it's increasing website traffic or boosting conversions, our team ensures you stay ahead in a competitive landscape.

Key Services:

SEO optimization

Social media advertising

Conversion rate optimization

Content creation and marketing

Data-driven analytics

2. WATConsult

A globally recognized agency, WATConsult focuses on delivering ROI-driven campaigns.

Strengths:

Integrated marketing solutions

Expertise in influencer marketing

3. Webchutney

Known for its creativity, Webchutney excels in crafting innovative campaigns for leading brands.

Specialties:

Viral marketing campaigns

Unique content strategies

4. Kinnect

Kinnect is one of India’s fastest-growing digital agencies, offering comprehensive marketing solutions.

Core Offerings:

Brand strategy

Social media amplification

5. Dentsu Webchutney

Dentsu Webchutney blends data and creativity to offer impactful digital advertising solutions.

Unique Selling Points:

Award-winning campaigns

Advanced analytics integration

6. Pinstorm

This agency is renowned for its performance-based marketing services.

Primary Services:

PPC campaigns

Search engine marketing

Choosing the Right Digital Advertising Company

When selecting an agency, consider the following factors:

Industry Experience Evaluate their past campaigns and client portfolio.

Customization Look for agencies that provide tailored strategies rather than one-size-fits-all solutions.

Transparency Ensure they offer clear pricing and regular performance reports.

Technology Adoption Advanced tools like AI and machine learning can significantly enhance campaign outcomes.

Customer Support Responsive customer service is crucial for addressing concerns promptly.

Why XENMAG is Your Ideal Choice

At XENMAG, we understand that every business has unique goals. Our strategies are designed to not only meet but exceed expectations. Here’s what sets us apart:

Customized Campaigns: We tailor every strategy to align with your business objectives.

Cutting-Edge Tools: From AI analytics to the latest ad platforms, we use state-of-the-art tools.

Expert Team: Our team consists of experienced professionals who are passionate about delivering results.

Proven Track Record: Our success stories speak for themselves.

Visit our Digital Marketing Agency page to learn how we can take your brand to new heights.

Future Trends in Digital Advertising

The digital advertising landscape is constantly evolving. Here are some trends to watch out for:

AI and Machine Learning: From predictive analytics to personalized ads, AI is revolutionizing campaigns.

Voice Search Optimization: With the rise of smart speakers, optimizing for voice search is becoming essential.

Video Marketing: Short-form videos on platforms like Instagram Reels and TikTok dominate user attention.

Programmatic Advertising: Automation ensures efficient and precise ad placements.

AR/VR Experiences: Augmented and virtual reality are creating immersive ad experiences.

Final Thoughts

Digital advertising is not just about placing ads online; it’s about creating meaningful connections with your audience. By partnering with a top-notch digital advertising company in India, businesses can unlock new growth opportunities and establish a robust online presence. Whether you’re a budding startup or an established enterprise, XENMAG is here to help you achieve your digital marketing goals.

Ready to make an impact? Visit XENMAG and transform your digital presence today!

[vigenrestaurantddmaustl]

Top Restaurant Website Essentials: Boost Your Online Presence with BYK Digital Discover the must-have features for successful restaurant websites with BYK Digital. From seamless online ordering to eye-catching design, learn how to elevate your restaurant's digital presence and attract more customers. Explore our expert tips and services tailored to meet the unique needs of the hospitality industry.

[townpostin]

Jharkhand CM Launches Health Worker Attendance Portal

New digital system aims to improve healthcare services across the state The portal will ensure daily attendance tracking and cross-verification for all health department staff. RANCHI – Jharkhand Chief Minister Hemant Soren inaugurated an "Attendance Portal" to monitor healthcare workers’ daily presence. The Chief Minister emphasized the government’s commitment to enhancing medical facilities. He…

[projectchampionz]

THE IMPACT OF OPTIMIZING HOSPITAL RESOURCE ALLOCATION AND COST MANAGEMENT STRATEGIES

THE IMPACT OF OPTIMIZING HOSPITAL RESOURCE ALLOCATION AND COST MANAGEMENT STRATEGIES ABSTRACT Background and Objectives: Hospitals today face significant challenges in managing limited resources and controlling costs, while still providing high-quality care to patients. Effective resource allocation and cost management strategies are critical for the long-term financial sustainability of…

[edifyingvoyagesflorida]

Transform your business with Edifying Voyages' proven search engine optimization services in Florida. Our dedicated team specializes in maximizing online presence, driving traffic, and boosting conversions. With years of experience in digital marketing, we guarantee results that surpass your expectations. Explore the power of SEO with us today!

[ennobletechnologies]

Effective Content Strategies for Healthcare

Healthcare Content Planning:

The healthcare industry, with its ever-evolving complexities, demands content that is meticulously planned and thoroughly researched. This planning ensures that the right message reaches the audience, resonating with their concerns and expectations. The essence of healthcare content planning lies in crafting narratives that not only inform but also connect with readers on a personal level.

Through digital mapping in healthcare communication, content creators can devise a roadmap that strategically places information, ensuring a coherent flow. This mapping takes into consideration the readers’ journey from being mere browsers to informed patients. Moreover, by leaning on data-driven insights, healthcare institutions can identify trends, understand patient behavior, and tailor content that hits the bull’s eye.

Medical Content Optimization

Let’s face it; medical jargon can be overwhelming. But optimizing content to be understandable and engaging for the layman is pivotal. It’s not just about diluting complex terms; it’s about presenting them in a context that’s relatable. Enhancing visual representation with diagrams, charts, and illustrations can provide clarity and enhance understanding. It’s like painting a picture with words and graphics, ensuring that the reader doesn’t get lost in translation.

Patient Education Strategies

Education is empowerment. In the context of healthcare, an informed patient is likely to make better health decisions. Using simplified language, devoid of heavy medical terminologies, can bridge the gap between practitioners and patients. Additionally, the integration of infographics, illustrations, and real-life patient stories serves as a robust mechanism to educate and inspire.

Healthcare SEO Tactics

The digital realm is bustling with information. For your healthcare content to stand out, it needs to be SEO-optimized. This involves integrating relevant medical keywords, ensuring content visibility on search engines. The power of user experience (UX) can’t be understated either. An engaging, user-friendly interface can significantly reduce bounce rates, making your content more appealing to the audience.

Hospital Content Marketing

Hospitals are more than just brick and mortar establishments providing healthcare services. They have stories to tell, experiences to share, and lives they’ve impacted. By crafting narratives that resonate with patients, hospitals can establish trust and loyalty. Integrating testimonials and reviews adds a layer of authenticity, emphasizing the significance of regular health checkups.

Medical Content Calendars

Regular engagement is the key. With medical content calendars, healthcare providers can schedule monthly health awareness campaigns, seasonal health tips, and reminders for regular screenings. This systematic approach ensures that there’s a constant flow of relevant content, keeping the audience informed and engaged.

Read More: https://ennobletechnologies.com/healthcare/healthcare-content-planning/

[anotherincorrectquotesblog]

A: Look on the bright side. If it fails, we will only sustain minor injuries - I’m talking three, maybe four months in the hospital. Maximum five.

[vonehospital]

Lifestyle Changes for Perfect Brain Health: Your Guide to Neurological Wellness

Explore our latest blog on Lifestyle Changes to Support Neurological Health. Dive deep into expert advice, exercises, diets, and mental stimulation tips. Join the Brain Health Revolution and transform your life today

[sleepinggardenias]

Sims 4 (!Base Game and GTW!) Hospital for PandaSama's Realistic Childbirth Mod

BUILD DETAILS

Willow Creek Hospital, Optimized for PandaSama's Realistic Childbirth Mod :)

vvv More Information and Download vvv

DOWNLOAD : HERE (Patreon, FREE)

vvv random little info vvv

I said when I made my First Hospital that I would make another using only base game, which I have finally done!

I typically like doing builds a lot more detailed, but my sim was in the middle of giving birth and I wanted to make the hospital as simple as possibly while still hopefully being somewhat aesthetically pleasing! This is only Base Game and the Required Get to Work so anyone who uses the mod can download. :)

Thank you for reading, have a lovely day <3

[xenmagmarketing]

Choosing the Right Digital Marketing Company in Jaipur: A Guide for Businesses

In today’s fast-paced digital era, having a strong online presence is not a luxury—it’s a necessity. Businesses in Jaipur, a city known for its vibrant culture and growing entrepreneurial ecosystem, are increasingly turning to digital strategies to stay ahead of the competition. Partnering with a digital marketing company in Jaipur can help your business achieve its goals, whether it’s boosting visibility, driving traffic, or increasing conversions.

If you’re a business owner in Jaipur, this guide will help you understand the benefits of hiring a digital marketing agency and how to select the right one for your needs.

Why Your Business Needs a Digital Marketing Company in Jaipur

Jaipur is witnessing rapid growth across various industries, and standing out in this competitive market requires strategic planning and execution. A digital marketing company in Jaipur offers a localized approach, blending expertise with a deep understanding of the city’s unique audience. Here’s why working with such a company is beneficial:

1. Localized Knowledge and Strategy

Unlike generic marketing efforts, a digital marketing agency in Jaipur understands the preferences, culture, and behavior of the local audience. This expertise translates into campaigns that are more relatable and impactful.

2. Expert Guidance

Digital marketing is a dynamic field with ever-changing trends. An experienced company stays updated with the latest techniques and tools to ensure your business stays ahead of competitors in Jaipur and beyond.

3. Measurable Results

With the right metrics and analytics, a digital marketing company in Jaipur ensures that every penny spent on marketing delivers measurable outcomes, from increased website traffic to higher sales conversions.

Services Offered by a Digital Marketing Company in Jaipur

Digital marketing encompasses a wide range of services designed to enhance your online presence and drive results. Here are the key offerings you can expect from a leading digital marketing company in Jaipur:

1. Search Engine Optimization (SEO)

A good digital marketing agency helps your website rank higher in search engine results, making it easier for potential customers to find you. This includes on-page and off-page optimization, keyword research, and technical audits.

2. Social Media Marketing

From Instagram to Facebook, social media platforms are essential for engaging with your audience. Agencies create tailored campaigns to build your brand’s presence and foster meaningful connections with your followers.

3. Content Marketing

High-quality content is essential for building trust with your audience. Blogs, articles, videos, and infographics help position your business as an industry leader.

4. Pay-Per-Click (PPC) Advertising

If you’re looking for quick results, PPC campaigns are the way to go. A reliable digital marketing company in Jaipur optimizes ad campaigns to ensure maximum ROI while minimizing costs.

5. Website Development and Design

Your website is often the first impression customers have of your business. Agencies ensure your site is not only aesthetically pleasing but also functional, mobile-responsive, and optimized for conversions.

Common Challenges Solved by a Digital Marketing Agency

Many businesses in Jaipur struggle with common challenges that hinder their growth. A digital marketing company in Jaipur offers tailored solutions to address these pain points:

1. Low Online Visibility

Even with a great product or service, it’s hard to succeed if your target audience can’t find you. SEO and PPC campaigns help boost your website’s visibility, ensuring you rank higher on search engines.

2. Poor Social Media Engagement

If your social media efforts aren’t yielding results, it may be time to rethink your strategy. Agencies specialize in creating engaging content and managing ad campaigns to attract and retain followers.

3. Limited Time and Resources

Running a business is time-consuming, and marketing may fall by the wayside. By outsourcing your marketing needs, you free up time to focus on your core operations while experts handle your digital presence.

4. Inconsistent Branding

A cohesive brand image is critical for customer trust and recognition. A digital marketing agency ensures your messaging is consistent across all platforms, from your website to social media profiles.

How to Choose the Best Digital Marketing Company in Jaipur

Selecting the right digital marketing partner is crucial for achieving your business goals. Here are some factors to consider:

1. Experience and Expertise

Look for a company with a proven track record in delivering results for businesses similar to yours. A seasoned digital marketing company in Jaipur will have the expertise to create strategies that work.

2. Customized Solutions

Every business is unique, and a one-size-fits-all approach rarely works. Ensure the agency offers personalized strategies tailored to your specific goals and challenges.

3. Transparency and Communication

Open communication and transparency in reporting are essential for building trust. Choose an agency that provides regular updates and involves you in the decision-making process.

4. Scalability

As your business grows, your marketing needs will evolve. A good agency should offer scalable services to accommodate your expanding requirements.

The Future of Digital Marketing in Jaipur

As Jaipur continues to grow as a commercial and technological hub, the demand for innovative digital marketing solutions will only increase. Businesses that invest in a digital marketing company in Jaipur today will be well-positioned to reap the rewards tomorrow.

From leveraging AI-driven tools to adopting omnichannel marketing strategies, digital marketing agencies are constantly evolving to meet the changing needs of businesses. By partnering with the right agency, your business can stay ahead of the curve and achieve sustainable growth.

Conclusion

Choosing a digital marketing company in Jaipur is a critical step toward unlocking your business’s full potential. From increasing brand visibility to driving conversions, the right agency can help you achieve your goals efficiently and effectively.

At XENMAG, we specialize in crafting data-driven digital marketing strategies that deliver results. Whether you’re looking to improve your SEO rankings, run successful PPC campaigns, or build a strong social media presence, we’ve got you covered.

Visit XENMAG’s Digital Marketing Services to learn more about how we can help your business thrive in Jaipur’s competitive landscape.

Take the first step toward digital success with XENMAG—the trusted digital marketing company in Jaipur.

[nereidprinc3ss]

trolley problem

in which fem!reader has been gambling with her life and spencer reid is more than a little concerned

flangst, hurt/comfort warnings/tags: passive suicidal ideation from reader, she keeps risking her life, that really grinds Spencer’s gears, established relationship, existential dread, existential euphoria, lots of stuff about grief and death and self worth, not advocating for this, pretension from the author, blasphemy probably?, reader gets fuzzy from prescribed painkillers, arguing, hospital stuff, mention of sleep paralysis involving spiders, reader gets shot but she’s fineee, I pander to intro to philosophy takers, bau!reader, neurodivergent coded reader, if she’s not exactly like you I’m sorry, bean soup a/n: one day you’re in a writing slump literally the next you are in your notes app for six hours writing whatever the fuck this is but I think I love it even tho it’s weird and I hope u like it too!! btw this was gonna be called cotard's syndrome but then I never once talk abt cotard's but if u care that might be interesting context for the motif of not feeling human/alive, WC 3K

Spencer hasn’t spoken to you since the doctor left the room five minutes ago. 

The air is antiseptic as you take it deep into the hollows of your lungs and trap it there for a moment, trying to optimize oxygen intake without actually having to breathe very often. Hospital smell is as universal as it is suffocating. It reeks of everything but death—flowers, blood, bleach, vomit. A humiliating, desperate scramble to defy the very thing that defines mortality. It’s pathetic. It reminds you of the worst instances of failure and loss and denial in your life. It curdles your blood. Literally rots you from the inside out. 

You’ve had ample time to ponder that smell over the last few months because you keep ending up here, and some time ago you decided the institution of the hospital is inherently absurd. It’s stupid to think you could avoid the one absolute condition on your corporeal form: impermanence. It is the only thing that is promised, and people still waste their lives away running from it. It is the ultimate self-fulfilling prophecy. 

So around the time you acknowledged that hospitals are simply monuments to the self-importance of man, you gave up on trying too hard to preserve yourself. You’ve seen death too much and too often. You’ve tried staving it off with prayer and the miracles of modern medicine, and it never matters in the end because it’s all magical thinking anyway. All the wallowing and the bargaining and pleading never got you anywhere. 

You’ve accepted that from the moment you were born, you were marked for death. 

But you’re not a complete nihilist. You’re not even totally resigned to the abject certainty of death—because you’ve found a loophole.

Everyone has as many chances at escaping death as other people are willing to offer them at the cost of their own lives. Not many people are willing to make that trade—someone else’s life for their own—but you’ve decided you are. Because if not you, then who?

It’s not that you don’t see the value in your own life, as Spencer keeps making it sound. It’s just the opposite. You understand that you’ve got an extremely valuable resource, and you don’t just have to sit on it. There are things you can do. Choices you can make. Ways to defy death. 

Just… not yours. 

Or maybe you’re just in deep denial. 

Either way—this is a philosophy your boyfriend intentionally refuses to understand. He gets mad, or some kind of upset, every time you try to explain it. Usually he ends up leaving the room close to tears. You never feel good about it.

Right now he’s presumably trying to give you the silent treatment and not doing a very good job. 

“Stop holding your breath. Why are you—stop that.”

Spencer’s frowning, skin sallow and milk-blue under fluorescent lighting. Purple seeps from around his eyes like spilled wine on a white table cloth. Your stomach turns. 

“Sorry.”

He doesn’t tell you not to apologize. You don’t expect him to. 

“Why are you doing that? Does something hurt?”

Other than your entire bicep being on fire due to the 9 millimeter Luger it recently came into contact with?

“Not really. I just don’t like the smell of hospitals.”

At that, he gets stony again. Like, Medusa stony. You feel a tightening in your chest that has nothing to do with a lack of air. His arms are crossed. A silk lined blazer drapes over your lap, and you wonder if he’s cold in just that white button up. It’s translucent in this light, like onion skin, or maybe something less organic—the folds and wrinkles look like fabric, but lots of things look like something they aren’t. In the Pietá, Jesus lounges dead on his mother’s lap, his cheek pressed to her arm like either of them have warm flesh, and her skirts drape from her knees and fall to the ground in delicate folds just like Spencer’s jacket and looking at pictures of it you swear you could find comfort there too—but if you wanted to make space for yourself next to Jesus you’d have to do it with a chisel and mallet. You’re starting to think that’s what it’s going to take with Spencer, as well. 

“So stop walking into active gunfire. You’ll spend a lot less time here.”

Every deep sigh (of which there have been several) calcifies you further. Ironically, you never feel less alive than you do in a hospital. 

“I didn’t walk into active g—”

“I’m not debating it with you. It’s not a discussion.”

“So you’re just going to be pissed at me for the rest of forever? I mean, if it’s not a discussion—what are you gonna do? Break up with me?”

You feel yourself dripping poison in the well. Even as you say it. As his head tilts toward you slowly and intently from his spot against the wall, and his warning gaze is cold and unforgiving and weighs 3.35 tons.

“Don’t.”

“Don’t what? Talk?”

“Don’t try and manipulate me by implying that there are no options between permissiveness and dumping you!”

“I’m not manipulating you. And I don’t need your permission to do anything.” 

The first part is an incredulous scoff as well as a blatant lie. You are manipulating him. Chisel and all. At least, you were trying to. It clearly doesn’t work very well. His jaw clenches.  

“Is this worth it to you? Fighting with me like we’re children solely so you don’t have to take accountability?”

“Accountability for what? I made a choice. I don’t regret it. You’re upset because I did my job.”

A beat. 

Silence always makes you feel the gravity of your words. 

“Do you believe that?”

His voice softens so much, so quickly, it splinters down the middle. 

You’ve never been known for your light touch. For someone who sees eviscerated bodies nearly every day, and prides herself on her evolved understanding of mortality, you often forget other people are not, in fact, impenetrable marble—they are flesh and blood and bone, and you’ve splattered yourself in the evidence of that. 

“What?” You murmur. You easily turn timid, when you’re afraid you’ve been too heavy-handed. Spencer’s seen you sob over the birds who hit the windowpane and never reappeared from the shrubbery—their delicate wings, their little beaks—he didn’t mean to, Spencer, and now he’s dead! He’s seen you spend forty minutes catching a spider with a cup and an envelope rather than smush it, even though you have reoccurring episodes of sleep paralysis wherein a giant arachnid is sitting on your chest, hissing and clacking its pincers. He knows you are, at your core, kind and good. 

It’s a little scary for someone to know that about you. It’s a little scary when you see your own vulnerability reflected in their eyes and the way they speak to you, the way you see it in him now. 

“Do you believe that the choices you make regarding your safety don’t concern me at all?”

“They’re… my choices to make,” you whisper, but you’re less sure than you were a minute ago. 

“I’m not talking about that—I’m talking about how it feels like you are trying to kill yourself every time we’re in the field.” His voice shakes. You swallow. “You have been hospitalized for four serious injuries sustained on the job in the past five months. Every time I bring it up, you—you talk about life like it’s optional for you. Like you’re not only willing to give it up but are actively looking to throw yourself in harm’s way every chance you get. You think that doesn’t terrify me?”

There’s a small chip in the paint on the wall next to him roughly the shape of Africa. 

“It’s not like that. I’m… I’m just having an unlucky streak.”

He snaps. 

“Luck isn’t going to get between you and a bullet. Ever.”

“It’s my job, Spencer.”

“No. It is a risk of the job. Not a defining feature or requirement. But you keep running toward gunfire like you have a quota to meet.”

“Spencer, I’m not doing it at you. I’m not trying to get myself hurt.”

“Well it doesn’t really feel like you’re trying to avoid it, either,” he shoots back immediately, and you feel the anguish radiating from him until it lodges in your own chest, like it was always yours. Maybe it was. 

You want to make it better, but you don’t know how, and even if you did, he’s pushing off the wall and crossing the room toward the door. 

“Where are you going?” You call, a little too desperately for your liking. 

“You need to eat something.”

Which translates roughly to he’s pissed and upset and he needs to leave the room. You’ve done this song and dance before. 

However, food and an absence of him are contenders for the absolute last two things you want right now. 

“Spencer, please don’t—”

But the door is already whooshing closed. 

You stare at the grey and white checkered floor. Light bounces off the waxen reflection—some sort of parallel universe you can’t reach, perhaps. The whole room is desaturated. A mechanical humming threatens to drive you insane. It doesn’t feel like a place for living humans. You’re not convinced you are one. 

When he comes back, maybe ten minutes later, nothing’s moved at all. In fact you’re not even sure you’ve been breathing. 

The door closes as quietly as it opens. 

This time, wordlessly, Spencer comes to you. You see his shoes first—his serious adult shoes. You wish he was wearing his Converse. 

Then you see the bottle of apple juice he’s cracking open for you. Blue lid. Same kind you always get. 

“You didn’t bring food.”

“You wouldn’t have eaten it.”

Fair enough. 

You take the bottle with your good arm and sip shallowly—all that adrenaline and the subsequent interpersonal strife has left you nauseous. The drink is too sweet. It clashes with the tang of metal in your mouth. 

Still, you drink enough to satisfy him, and then you’re tossing his jacket aside before balancing the bottle between your thighs so you can screw the lid back on. He doesn’t go back to the couch or his spot on the wall. 

Spencer doesn’t pull away when you lean into him, but it does take him a moment to reciprocate. You’re still grateful all the same when he cradles the back of your head to his stomach like you’re made of porcelain. 

“I don’t think you understand how upset I am,” he says quietly. 

Only Spencer Reid could be furious with you and still hold you like this. 

“I’m sorry,” you murmur. 

“That’s not good enough. You need to stop risking your life like that.”

He doesn’t get it. Your brows flutter as they try to furrow but even holding that expression saps you. Maybe the pain meds are finally kicking in. 

“I just wanna help people.”

“That doesn’t explain to me or justify your urge to do it at the cost of your own life. We all want to help people, angel. The whole team. That’s why we do what we do. But we don’t run into shootouts. We don’t split off and provoke people with guns when we’re unarmed and unprepared.”

“But it worked. She got away.” You feel a spark of fulfillment at the memory of Gloria Sanchez in JJ’s arms just before the ambulance doors had slammed you into your first cage of the night. 

“We don’t know if he was going to kill her. He might not’ve fired at all if you didn’t go running toward him. That wasn’t strategic, it was reckless and irresponsible and you know that. I know you do. So something else is going on.”

The pressure in your nose that usually precipitates tears comes as a surprise. 

“I just—if that’s how I can save someone, why shouldn’t I, you know? Why do they have less of a right to live than I do just because they’ve been deprived of the choice? If I have a choice, and they don’t, I should choose to… to help them. That’s my job.”

For a long moment, you listen to your own breath, muffled by Spencer’s shirt, and the mechanical humming, and something dripping, and the low, buzzy chatter of nurses far down the hallway.

When Spencer next speaks you get the sense he’s holding a lot back. His voice is taut enough it wavers slightly. Taut enough that if he weren’t speaking so quietly he might be yelling. It’s like pinpricks all over your body—not enough to hurt, but enough to make sure you’re paying attention. 

“You can’t help anyone if you’re dead. Do you understand me?”

And yes, in theory, you do. But that doesn’t negate your original point. It only takes one life or death moment for you to utilize the most valuable resource you have. What happens after is no longer your concern. 

“On the psych evals you helped develop it asks if you think it’s appropriate to sacrifice the one to save the many. The answer is supposed to be no. If you say yes you get flagged. The FBI frowns upon… lever-pullers. And that’s exactly what I’m doing if I let one person die when I could’ve potentially saved them.”

“Protecting your own life is not pulling the lever. What you’re doing isn’t smart or morally righteous. You’re just throwing yourself across the tracks, too. If you were to fail a psych eval right now it would be because you’re passively suicidal. And you know what? The FBI also tends to frown upon self-immolative delusions of grandeur and girls who like to play sacrificial lamb.”

“’M not a… sacrificial lamb…”

“No,” Spencer agrees quietly, stroking your hair. “You’re not.”

And you can’t react to the fragility in his voice, or the content of his words, and the fact that when he says it he means something different—you can’t do anything about it. You can only catalogue it. You can only know that he loves you, and feel a little guilty about it.

Some time passes. You don’t know how long he remains standing so you can doze against him. He does not smell like the hospital. He’s the antidote for whatever grief they distill from widows and orphans before aerosolizing it through the whole place. 

“Baby?” He asks eventually. You know the lilt of it. He’s been thinking. 

“Hm?”

He hesitates. 

“Can we talk about you maybe taking some time off of work?”

“You heard the boss,” you mumble. “I can’t come in for at least a week.”

“I mean beyond that.”

You intend to respond, but by the time you open your mouth you’ve lost the prompt in all the brain fog. 

“You’re so comfy,” you murmur dreamily. “Thank you for being mad at me.”

If he responds, you miss it. 

You’re imagining the bed waiting for you at home, once the doctor is done observing you—warm, neatly made. Blankets woven with soft fibers. A mattress that will sink under your weight. You think of Spencer, who’s shaping himself to you, Spencer, who intentionally inhales when you exhale at night to make room for the rise and fall of your chest against his. You think of the imprint of his buttons on your cheek. You are both flesh and blood and bone. 

Strange, pill-induced half dreams and visions and memories take over. You’re in that alleyway again. That man fires. You don’t blink or scream or feel. 

Just before the bullet makes contact you’re standing in front of the Pietá. It’s massive. Spencer is there, too, holding your hand. 

You can’t actually see him, only, you know he’s there. You feel his warmth, his presence, when he leans over to whisper in your ear. The way you know him goes beyond sight. 

The Pietá—meaning the pity, in English—is 6’7” and six feet wide. It weighs 6,700 pounds. Michelangelo had to quarry the block of marble himself. He was only 25 when he finished. The Basilica keeps it behind bulletproof glass. 

Jesus and Mary behind bullet proof glass. 

God. Who’d try to kill Jesus a third time? He’s already dead. 

Besides—they’re both made of stone. Bullets would probably just ping right off of them. Or maybe they’d shatter just like you did. 

Probably not though. You’re not actually made of marble. You’ve no idea what it feels like to be a statue and get shot at. You sure know how it feels as a human, though—and it feels like shit. You don’t really know why you keep doing it. None of your reasons are good enough for Spencer, and he’s, generally speaking, pretty smart about some things. 

Maybe you’re tired of being human.

Maybe you’re tired of sleeping on your arm funny and waking up to a hand in your bed that doesn’t feel like yours and remembering all the hands you’ve held moments before they couldn’t hold yours back. Or tired of those moments where you are being held and it’s so unbelievably perfect and then someone has to let go, or when someone you love hugs you goodbye and you realize that there will always be a final I love you, or simply getting older and watching potential life paths fall away like rotten fruit to the ground. Maybe life is sometimes so good it hurts and you can’t bear it. So you tempt fate. You walk a tightrope because even if you fall and it can’t ever feel good again—at least it can’t hurt either. At least you won’t lose anymore. 

And yet. 

It does feel good, sometimes. Sort of often, actually. Even when it’s awful. 

Dead Jesus and Mary, with their marble skin and their bulletproof glass and their holiness and their virginity and all the other things they have that you don’t. Nobody can hurt them anymore. Not ever. 

Maybe that’s something you envy.

But you doubt they’ve ever been so terribly, wonderfully alive as you’ve been, or as comfortable as you are like this, leaning into Spencer’s warmth and his softness, in the hospital, or the Vatican, or your dreams. Your bicep was ruined but it’s healing. You are capable of ruin and rebirth in the same lifetime. In the same day, in the same hour. 

You doubt that in 520 years, behind bulletproof glass and unyielding, eternally flawless skin, they’ve ever felt as invincible as you do now. 

You doubt they ever could. 

[jennamoran]

I got home from the hospital after a knee incident to discover that apparently the wireless Internet had been specifically routing through my knee, which has actually sent me down this huge rabbit hole of how basically knees are the natural environment of electromagnetic waves due to the meniscusal resonance amplification but it wasn't until like 2014 that the first Verizon scientists were able to break people's knees open to figure out how to optimize this affinity for practical effect. These days obviously the Internet can resonate off of any human ligament but the knee internal protocol is still built into every system at the lower levels, which is why you get incidents like this even when all the rest of my wireless resonance chambers are fundamentally intact