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#opportunities!!! for little kids who may never get them otherwise!!!
covertblizzard · 3 months
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it is very important to me that steph is a talented pianist and i think we should get her on the piano again
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principledpropo · 2 years
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Does she… hate her children? Despise having to be involved in any way - does the action of simply discussing Damian piss this woman off?
Because if so, then god damn I love it, because we get to see the truly perfect antithesis to Loid and Yor.
The Forgers aren’t perfect, but the way they involve themselves in Anya’s life is beautiful. It’s warm and loving while teaching her to make and respect boundaries (that’s difficult for a telepath lmao), but their walls almost always come crashing down the second they find themselves alone in each other’s company. Loid may be strict and Yor may be a little too enthusiastic, but every action they take for Anya is for her sake, and every mistake they make is an experience they immediately learn from to better raise Anya.
The Desmonds aren’t physically abusive, nor do they scream nor degrade their kids. Both Desmond scions are clearly well-off, having wealth and service in spades. Everything they could ever want, at the snap of their fingers. Except their parent’s love and attention. Donovan sees his sons as tools to further his name and goals, while Melinda (and this is just conjecture) shows shades of a woman who never wanted children and is searching for ways to live and enjoy her life free of their burden.
(Little tangent, but people, women especially, shouldn’t be saddled with kids if they do not wish to. Their body, their choice, and no one should ever say otherwise. That being said, when the child is born, the parent has a lifelong responsibility to that child, and regret is no longer an option. I see so many parents who practically begged to have kids, but ended up resenting them, and in turn their kids grow and feel the same way to them. You can never let your children feel like they are a mistake. Never.)
To Donovan, his children are materials that can be shaped into weapons for his political gain and clout. To Melinda, (again, just a hunch), they are nuisances she can’t be bothered to deal with.
But Loid and Yor, who don’t share a single drop of blood with Anya? Who created and joined their family for self-protection? They can’t stop themselves - they shower Anya with love. They can’t spoil her with gifts like Becky and Damien get, but they never starve Anya of what matters most: their love, their time, and their energy. Anya is an esper - if she grew up with people like Desmonds, she’d know immediately she was unloved. Hell, she has! Returned to foster homes again and again. So it is beautiful that a girl who can read her parent’s anxieties and fears has never once heard them think she was a mistake (well other than that first episode with Loid lol). They have had every opportunity to grow resentful of Anya, but they never have. They think the world of her. Mr. “It’s for the mission” Twilight bends over backwards on a whim for his daughter. Yor “I won’t let my daughter die in school” Forger would commit war crimes if she even thought her precious child got a boo boo.
The Desmonds, at best, see their children as investments and at worst mistakes. But no matter what Anya does, good or bad, it doesn’t ever change their perspective of her.
She isn’t just a cover child to them. She’s their daughter, and they’d shake heaven and earth for her when the Desmonds can’t even be bothered to attend their son’s orientation day.
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amywritesthings · 11 months
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silver underground. / chapter 15.
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( Read on AO3 )
Pairing: levi ackerman x f!reader (attack on titan / shingeki no kyojin)
Word Count: 4.6K
Summary: flashback five - also known as the start of the heist that may grant you a chance at living in the sun
Warnings: verbal arguments, miscommunications, self harm language, mentions of injury, death, and illness
Previous Chapter. / Next Chapter. | Masterlist.
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CHAPTER 15 - FLASHBACK: FIVE
note: the next couple of chapters will be heavily influenced by the ova 'no regrets'. they are my interpretations of the material. please watch those episode first, otherwise you will get spoiled on elements revolving around levi's backstory.
“This is suicide.”
Furlan winces at your strong reaction. Isabel pales.
They’re both sitting on the edges of the love seat couch, equal parts surprised yet expectant of your reluctance.
Of course they had Levi break the news first.
Neither of them wanted the blow back of your rage at the mere entertainment of such a problem.
Levi, however, can take your anger and neatly fold it with the rest of the clothes you’ve shared since you were kids. He knows how to dismantle your rage in ways the other two have never quite mastered.
At the kitchenette table, the raven-haired man doesn’t move from his chair. Leisurely his arm drapes along its back, legs crossed in front of him. You wait a full table-length away from him, hunched with your hands pressed into the wooden surface separating you.
A stand off.
The other two watch like hawks, awaiting a response from Levi that never arrives. You feel the worry rolling off of Furlan and Isabel in waves, a concern they can’t quite voice, but all you can do is stare at him.  
Dead eyes, unwilling to express anger or excitement, meet you.
Right now, you hate him.
You hate Levi’s neutrality.
You hate this godforsaken city. 
Most importantly, you hate how easy a few pretty words can upend your entire operation.
After a long stretch of silence Isabel clears her throat, fidgeting with her fingers. “We would be careful, sis. We’re always so careful. The old man said—”
“I know what he told you, Isa,” you snap, and Isabel whimpers with uncertainty. “I think I heard it loud and clear — unless there’s a part of the proposal I missed. Levi?”
His eyes flinch to a narrowed state.
You’re angry.
You’re angry because a devil made an offer.
Not just any devil — a devil from the surface, one that lives within the walls and takes the sunlight for granted. A demon willing to dangle the one thing everyone in the Underground City district desires most on a flimsy little stick: 
Salvation.
More specifically, documentation that’s as precious as rare rubies. Papers that bypass the thugs bleeding funds dry at the top of the stairs. A ticket to a better life, one where a person like you can walk among the living rather than fight with the dead for scraps.
The offer sounds too good to be true.
It sounds too good to be true because it is.
(We were offered a job by someone from the surface, someone with the reputable means to back up his payment, and we accepted the terms and conditions in exchange for money and a one-way ticket to the surface.)
Ever since you were seventeen, finding a way for the four of you to live on the surface is all Furlan has wanted. Now you're twenty-one with an opportunity for a way out. You cannot take an entire gang there — the transport of underlings cannot work like that, the logistics are not feasible, but this?
For the people he’s grown up with, laughed with, cried with?
(His family — Furlan has said the doomed word more than once to your face, to Isabel’s, to Levi’s. None of you have ever corrected him.)
What was once a fruitless idea has been fertilized and harvested, corrupted by grubby hands who can make a pipe dream happen.
It’s poisonous to a dreamer like him — like Isabel, who has never lost her knack for dreaming no matter how dire things get, so you focus your efforts on the only other person in this apartment who may see the reality for what it is.
A lost cause.
(A trap.)
“Doesn’t it seem wildly convenient,” you begin with a bite, “that some rich asshole found the three of you wandering the streets with little to no trouble? We’re supposed to have eyes everywhere. We’re virtually untouchable, even on the main roads.”
“The Military Police have been after us for years, James,” Furlan argues, but his words falter closer to a plea. “Pretty sure everyone down here knows our names. And it’s not like the Military Police have no idea where we live, so it stands to reason this guy—”
“That isn’t the point, Furlan,” you tell him. “You’re talking about the MPs. This guy is not an MP. He’s an outsider.”
Furlan’s frown deepens. “So?”
“So?" you repeat. "So you don’t think it’s suspicious, at all, that this shithead is offering us a job—” The humorless laugh bubbling on your lips stops your train of thought. “Actually, calling this a job is an insult to what we’ve built.”
“James—”
“Blackmail, Furlan. It’s fucking blackmail.” You pause, allowing the word to permeate through the room. “He is blackmailing us with the promise of money and the one thing everyone down here wants.”
A right to the surface.
A chance to live a life in the sun.
“Because we’re the only ones who can pull off a heist like this!”
Isabel urges with a naivety you typically adore. Right now? You loathe it. 
“How many other people, what other gangs, have what we have? The numbers. The ODM stuff. The old man believes in us.”
On instinct, you sneer.
Belief, like it’s stronger than money.
Instead of taking your anger out on her — she doesn’t deserve it, not when you know her bleeding heart would pour itself dry without hesitation for a chance to bring this found family to surface safely — you snap your attention back to the quiet, contemplative man across from you.
He’s too calm about this; Levi trusts people from the surface as far as he can throw them.
Granted, it’s probably further than the distance you can toss, but still — it isn't far.
So you ask.
“Why?”
Levi's eyes narrow further, thinning to a sliver.
You lean in closer, gritting your teeth. Your necklace dangles off of your neck like a noose.
“Why are you okay with this?”
Curving your steps around the table, you walk towards him. Levi stays seated, eyes stalking your movements with practiced memorization.
“Why aren’t you telling them this is a terrible idea?”
Furlan holds out a noncommittal hand to stop you. “James—”
“Because we don’t have a choice,” Levi interrupts, finally standing from his chair. He doesn’t sound angry, but you know Levi sometimes better than you know yourself. Something is there, just under the layer of nonchalance. “It’s complicated.”
A storm flickers in his eyes when they meet yours.
“There’s nothing complicated about it,” you tell him, your words rushed under your breath. “We make the rules. From the very beginning until now, we make the rules. We don’t let surface scum tell us how to live our lives. We always have a choice.”
His chin tilts to the left. “Not this time.”
“Why?”
“We just don’t.”
“We do, Levi.”
“No, James, we don’t.”
He firmly emphasizes each syllable. 
Then, finally, he places the caveat on the table: 
“They have Yan.”
The warmth in your body pools at your feet, like the blood has seeped through the soles of your shoes and into the wooden blanks beneath.
It’s no secret that Yan, one of the long-time underlings of the gang, hasn’t been doing well.
Over the last few months, his legs have gone from bad to catastrophically worse. He’s barely managed on jobs, causing him to fall behind on earnings.
From the corner of your eye, you see it: Furlan’s head tilts back, eyes closed. He deflates, shoulders first, until his whole body shrinks.
It reeks of guilt.
(Why the hell would Furlan be guilty?)
Isabel is the opposite; her body tenses as her wild ginger hair flings side-to-side to look at Furlan, then Levi, then back to Furlan, waiting for an explanation.
Then you realize: she isn’t waiting for anything, not like you.
Because Isabel already knows that Yan’s being held hostage; she’s just waiting to see who will say it first — or if she’ll be forced to be the one to bring you into the loop.
Suddenly the world feels smaller, like you’re back in that little makeshift ring by an abandoned street stop.
Alone and fending for yourself.
“The hell do you mean, they have Yan?” You hate how shaken your voice sounds.
“Saw it with my own two eyes,” Levi tells you in a monotone manner. “There wasn’t anything we could do. So, no, we don’t have a choice — unless we want him to die.”
“Which means you all saw it.”
The words of doubt tumble from your tongue. Levi’s eyes tick in a squint to decipher what you mean, but you create physical space with a step backwards.
“All of you knew this wasn’t just about the money from some rich fuck, but you didn’t tell me the second you came back. Why didn’t—”
“I didn’t tell you right away because Furlan has been skimming money for Yan under the table,” Levi blurts, effectively stopping you from crawling into yourself. 
The ball of yarn halts in its unravel. An uncomfortable silence fogs the room.
“...what?”
But that isn’t your voice.
Isabel speaks now with the same confusion in your gut. Her fiery hair whips to Furlan for an explanation.
Furlan doesn’t move a muscle.
You blink back into your body, and soon you find Levi standing right in front of you. He urges you with just a look, a nonverbal reassurance:
Breathe.
You’re not alone.
(You aren’t fighting three against one again.)
“It’s no secret that his legs went to shit,” Levi explains, level yet earnest. “First it was his ankle. Then it was his knee. Then it became both knees. Whatever disease he has, it’s spreading and it’s spreading fast. All of us have seen it coming: he can barely keep up with his team. No jobs means no earnings. Those are our rules. Furlan chose to skim off the top to help with treatments.”
Levi tenses under your widening stare. 
“I knew," he finishes. "Furlan didn’t know I knew, but I did. Not Isabel, not anyone else — just me.”
Blame me, he’s telling you without saying so. Don’t punish everyone else for this.
(Levi Ackerman, always ready to shoulder your burdens without hesitation.)
Only one question numbly exits your lips: “For how long?” 
Levi studies your eyes.
“Since the Nightshade job.”
Piece by piece, the gravity of your situation comes together.
You can feel it weighing down your shoulders when your attention flickers to Furlan.
Furlan trembles as he continues to stare at the ceiling. His complexion is tinged with a mortified, red-handed glaze.
The corner of your lips pull to a sympathetic frown. “Why didn’t you tell us?”
“It wasn’t anyone else’s business but Yan’s and Furlan’s,” Levi answers for the other man.
“But we could have helped,” you protest, turning your attention back to Levi. "Me, Isabel, all four of us — we could have helped."
“It’s a gang, James, not a church,” Levi bitterly argues. “If we help one person’s problems, then everyone looks for handouts. That isn’t how we operate.”
A hefty glare settles on your brow. “And now these people have Yan, who — by all intents and purposes — we could leave to die. Right?”
A squeak bubbles in Isabel's throat.
Levi tilts his chin with a knowing sharpness.
“Sure, if we want those bastards to torture him for information about us.”
There: the spark, the swift kick in your ass, to ignite the fire in your belly once again.
You’re mad, you’re furious — but not at any of them.
“So I was right,” you chide, chin dropping to your chest. “This is just blackmail—”
“His legs are shit out of luck if he doesn’t receive treatment at a surface clinic.”
A fingertip lifts the tip of your chin back up.
It’s enough of a shock to your system to get you to listen — Levi rarely, if ever, shows blatant affection in front of the other two, yet here he is: blurring the lines for the sake of keeping your focus.
“Bottom line is that I want to work with these pieces of shit just as much as you do, but without the proper medical treatment, Yan’s as good as dead," Levi explains. "Even if we left him to fend for himself, it could still destroy not only our reputation, but he could give them access to everything we have. Bringing Yan back is the best option for business. Furlan, Isabel, and I will do the job—”
Furlan, Isabel, and I?
“Wait.”
“—get him what he needs, bring him home—”
“Wait, what do you mean by—”
“—and we’ll figure it out from there.”
“—just the three of you?” you finally finish, voice smaller with each word. “But what about…”
“The bastard didn’t intercept you,” Levi says, and you push his hand from your chin.
“We need someone to take care of everyone else,” Isabel chimes in softly, shrugging a noncommittal shoulder.
You blink towards the younger girl with her shining eyes, seeking your approval; a cease fire to an awkward evening.
“If it’s a trap created by MPs, then at least we know our gang can get away if they come knocking on our door, right?” she adds. “James is fast. She’s a fighter. She can take them on, no problem.”
“No, Isabel,” you start, “what you need is a B-Team.”
“Hate to say it, but Isabel is right.” Furlan finally speaks, exhaling in a short huff. “He didn’t see your face or ask for you by name, so you’re kind of off the hook.”
In a shocking turn of events, Levi agrees in a matter-of-fact finality. “The less people involved, the better.”
That overwhelming sense of dread rears its ugly head once again, creeping up the veins of your neck.
“Don’t be stupid. Every job needs a B-Team,” you argue right back. “The three of you cannot just go on this job without eyes on—”
“Maybe not this one,” Levi shuts down your offer with little remorse. “This shit’s already two people too many.”
Your eyes grow, appalled.
“You’re serious?”
He doesn’t budge.
“I’m sorry, but are you fucking insane? What the hell happens, then, if any of you get caught?”
“James,” Furlan begins, holding both palms up. Your hair falls into your line of deadly sight when your attention whips to the lanky man with shaggy, ash-blonde hair. “We were doing this way before you came into the picture, okay? Levi and me, I mean."
You scowl. “You two were beating people up for money in fucking alleyways before me, not taking sacrificial bribes from surface pigs.”
Furlan frowns deeply, and you decide you hate him just as much as you hate Levi right now — because Furlan responds quietly and full of respect. Adoration.
“We’ll come home. We’ll make it to the surface, together. Please, you have to trust us.”
Your nostrils flare and the fire in your belly quells as you lock eyes with your friend.
“It isn’t you I don’t trust.”
Never. 
You trust the people in this little apartment more than anyone in the Underground City.
You would go to war with them, die for them, if it meant they could be happy.
Surely by now, after all these years, the three of them knew implicitly where you stood.
The problem, however, no longer lies below: it’s the people above you in more ways than one.
(What lies on the surface is the enemy.)
One false move and the four of you stand a chance to lose everything —
Including each other.
Sickened by the absolutes you face, your hands push off the table.
"Fuck this. If you want to kill yourselves, then be my guest. Throw it all away. We’re not making it to the surface.”
Isabel stands from the couch as you turn on a heel, spinning towards the front door. “Wait!”
“I’m not sticking around to watch you die, Isa,” you bite at the young girl. She flinches from your venom. “Same goes for you, Church, and Ackerman.”
You don’t wait any longer.
Can’t; you feel sick to your stomach and don’t want to make a mess of the apartment.
Without another word, you step past the threshold of the apartment and into the damp outdoor air. Your boots shuffle down the narrow staircase, quick and panicked.
Isabel calls out your name — your first name, a cheap trick that usually gets you to listen.
You don’t.
Passing the corner is as far as you get when you hear a second set of shoes following in tandem, hitting solid ground and turning a similar edge.
Let them.
You’re too upset to confront, to ward them off, especially when you have a pretty good feeling as to who may have run after you.
You continue your trek, head bowed to avoid the watchful eye of your gang runts guarding the apartment premises. Through a main street and into an alleyway you’ve grown so familiar with.
Twenty-one; it only took a few years to finally get here, where the dream dries to a mirage.
A warm hand grabs your bicep, anchoring you in place. “Hey.”
You stop.
You don’t fight.
“Hey,” you greet in return without turning, allowing your arm to float in the finite space between bodies.
“Want me to let you go so you can continue your dramatic nature walk?”
Lessening his grip for emphasis, Levi waits.
(I won't keep you prisoner.)
The baritone of his voice, neutral with an edge of care, vibrates through your body like a soothing aloe. 
“Depends,” you answer, craning your chin to watch him over your shoulder. “Are you going to run after me?”
“Kind of already did.”
The anger evaporates from the crown of your head to your toes with each passing second. Eventually you drop the heel of your boot to the ground, lessening the strain on your raised arm.
Then the tension between his brows dissolves, too, when it’s only the two of you here.
“Talk to me.” The request is barely above a whisper. “Don’t shut me out.”
His choice of words — your words, thrown back at your face — almost steals your breath.
“You shut me out about Yan,” you argue childishly. “About Furlan.”
“Like I told you, it wasn’t any of our business.”
“And you’re shutting me out of the job.”
“I’m not trying to—”
“It’s our home, Levi.”
You blink away, embarrassed by your sentiment. His hand flexes to let go of your arm. It unceremoniously drops to your side.
“We’re supposed to be… We’re supposed to watch out for each other. All four of us. That’s what we do. We don’t leave each other behind.”
“I know,” he says, somber, as if to apologize in his own way.
“If this is your half-baked attempt to protect me…”
You trail off when something flickers in his eyes. His expression shifts, and your shoulders drop.
“I could be a part of the heist,” you surmise, “but you’re leaving me out on purpose.”
His jaw clenches. “If I could leave Isabel out, too, then I would. Same with Furlan.”
“So it—”
“You’re the only one.”
Levi pauses, fighting to find the right words.
“You were the only one who wasn’t forced into that carriage. Chances are we’ll be flanked on all sides by Military Police. If things go to shit, then I know you’ll be safe back here.”
“Who can really guarantee that I’ll be safe?” You shake your head. “Isabel said it herself: it could be a trap. They could be trying to attack the rest of the gang while the three of you aren’t here.”
“Yeah, and there’s no one I trust more to make sure we’re still in operation. No one.”
He speaks with such conviction that you almost believe him.
(It’s not about trust in protecting assets, but something more basic than that.)
“And if you get arrested, then you don’t want me there,” you finally say what he won’t, and Levi’s eyes dart to the left to avoid yours. “You want me to be the last person standing.”
“We won’t get arrested.” His wispy black hair jostles when he shakes his head. “We’re too fast on ODM gear. The MPs won’t stand a chance.”
Silence engulfs the space. Your brain continues to run the numbers, the logistics, of the proposed heist plan given by this mysterious buyer. 
Every scenario, every issue, every failsafe — you can’t shake the foreboding chill in your blood.
“And who’s to say they haven’t already killed Yan?” you decide to ask, running through your list of concerns.
“Yan contacted Furlan two hours ago,” he answers. “He’s already at a first-rate clinic.”
“What if it’s bullshit? A set up, where they’re pretending to be Yan?”
“Do you think I’d fall for a fake report?” Levi scowls, insulted.
“No, but Furlan would.”
“I checked, twice.”
Which means it’s true.
Your doubt never creeps up to Levi, not once. 
Dejected in what little choice remains on the table, your attention subconsciously lands on his parted lips.
“...how do we receive the surface papers?”
“He already paid half of what he’s promised. I checked: it’s not bullshit. The money’s real,” Levi explains slowly. “Furlan, Isabel, and I will take the ODM gear and finish the job. Then we’ll get Yan back safely, give the money to the gang, and take you with us.”
“So I just… sit around like an old maid and hope everyone makes it back in one piece? Then we all get to hold hands, walk up the staircase, and strut straight through Wall Sina like we belong there?” You sigh heavily. “It sounds too good to be real.”
“I know,” he murmurs. “But Isabel’s right: we have to make sure our people don’t get stuck in the crossfires with the MPs.”
“Then agree to a B-Team.”
You slide a boot forward, lifting your attention to his eyes. His attention, however, slides opposite of yours — further south, staring at your lips as you propose.
“Let me lead a small group of us to watch your back.”
“James.”
“Levi,” you murmur his name, “look at me.” Surprisingly, he obeys. “You’re out of your fucking mind if you think I’m going to butt out of the one job that might change our lives. You protect me, sure, but I protect you, too. We’ll maintain our distance and have units set up to guard the apartment, but I want to be on the streets making sure you’re clear.”
His brows knit together briefly. “...I need you to be safe.”
“I will.”
“Because if I’m out there thinking for one second that you’re not—”
Reaching for the collar of his shirt, you pull him in to press a chaste yet firm kiss to his lips.
He tenses, seemingly expecting a wild punch, but he melts on contact and wraps his arms around you with a fierceness only a dead man can possess.
Because that’s all anyone can be down here: dead lives, dead faces, waiting for the final nail in the coffin. The world doesn’t scare people like Levi.
(What he’s terrified of, however, is trapped against his chest. Two hearts wildly beating in tandem. Unspoken confessions. The light.)
You nip at his lower lip, causing a tiny, needy noise to exit his throat. His arms tighten, and his feet drag the two of you towards a nearby wall.
Out of view.
His tongue searches for yours and you relent, pressing your hips into his. He makes another short, broken noise, and bunches your shirt into his fist.
Running your fingers through his hair, you drag your nails against his scalp and try to convey your urgency: please don’t leave me behind, please don’t get caught, please don’t disappear.
After a minute he rips his lips away, face tinged with a pink, bashful hue. 
You open your eyes, drunk on the sight of his blush.
“...dirty trick,” he huffs without an ounce of anger in his voice.
“I got a couple of those up my sleeve,” you murmur in jest, smiling despite yourself.
He exhales again, sounding close to a laugh, and drops his forehead to yours. You press back, closing your eyes and allowing the moment to pass.
Peace.
(How much time do either of you have left?)
“Take a B-Team to the streets,” he finally relents. “Monitor our movements. Follow any MPs that might turn their attention to our employees. The client stated our target objectives will be making contact regardless of our consent, so as far as I’m concerned, the job’s already started.”
“I’ll keep our people safe, I promise.”
“I know you will,” he reassures, taking a rare moment of affection to lift his chin. His lips kiss the tip of your nose, warming your once frozen insides. “I trust you.”
You nod. “And when you finish the job, I’ll go where you go.”
He hums. “Is that right?”
“I made a promise, didn’t I?”
“Like a dumbass,” he jokes in that deadpan humor of his, and you can’t help but finally smile.
“But I’m your dumbass.”
“What an aspiration,” he groans, feigning annoyance. “My very own dumbass who’s gonna spend too much of her fucking time decorating our very dumbass house—”
“A house?”
Not just a house — our.
You abruptly pull your forehead from his to look him in the eye. Levi mentally backtracks, realizing his grave mistake from the way the whites of his eyes grow, but you press your hands into either side of his face to trap him in.
“Levi Ackerman, are you gonna get us a house?”
He sneers. “Where else are we going to fucking live?” 
“Are you kicking out Furlan and Isabel?” you ask, unable to stop the grin from growing on your face.
Levi, knowing damn well he’s been caught red handed, groans and drops his head back.
“With the amount of money we’re making from this heist, Furlan damn well better be able to afford his own house. I’m sick of cleaning up after his shit. Isabel can go with him.”
You bite your lower lip. “They could always be our neighbors.”
“Took the words right out of my mouth.”
The sarcasm bleeds right through, and you can’t help it: the giggle bursts from your throat, and Levi leans in to pepper gentle kisses against the base of your throat.
“Can I get a pet?” you ask, lifting your chin to the sky.
“A furball?” His teeth nip playfully at your skin. You jolt. “The little shit’s hair will get everywhere.”
“It’s your consolation prize for demoting me to B-Team.”
He tsk’s under his breath, allowing a beat to pass.
“Maybe one.”
“A cat?”
“Yeah.”
“Or two.”
“You’re pushing it.”
“I’m negotiating, Ackerman.”
“You can negotiate once we have a key, alright?”
You giggle in response, tugging his chin up to stare into his eyes. Levi settles against you, arms still looped around your waist, and sighs through his nose.
He admires the view, clearly taking the moment to memorize every inch of your face.
It feels too final.
“Come back to me, Levi,” you murmur, pouring all of your emotions into five small words.
At first he nods, small and earnest, before sealing your words with a gentle kiss.
“I won't go far from you."
.
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author's note: I'm glad we collectively giggled and screamed and kicked our feet in the last few chapters. It was a marvelous time. Now I'm out here ruining everything.
Thank you to all of your wonderful feedback, asks, reblogs, etc. I can't believe my draft doc is over 60K words! I want to say we're about halfway through the story I want to tell, if not further in. We're definitely halfway through the flashbacks, so I promise those who have been asking about the CH10 cliffhanger… just hang tight (like James - ha.)
Please note that there will not be an update on August 11, as I have a bachelorette weekend to attend for a friend, so I'm hoping to write through the week and maybe post the next update on August 18.
tag list: @lazylizzy3 @notgoodforlife @sad-darksoul @dailydoseof-love @maliakealoha @nube55 @kateastrophies @blinkingsuns @gomigami @voidszoro @tanyeonn @chishiyasan @im-just-a-simp-le-whore @vigilancio @nomi98 @urfavcelestialangel @milkersonmac
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tojisbbygworl · 1 year
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My Wife is a Stoner and a Bitch and it’s Driving Me Crazy - Toji Fushiguro x Black!Reader ~ FFL Series
Summary: Megumi is finally out of the house which means it’s time to spark up. Toji - 33, You - 30, Megumi - 12
Characters: Toji, Megumi, Yuuji, Sukuna, Gojo
Words: 6,215
Tags: 18+, 2nd person, Fluff, Established Relationship, Marijuana, AU-No Curses, SMUTTTT, Car sex, High Sex, Cunnilingus, Toji is Whipped, DILF, Toji is a Good Dad, Soft Toji
Disclaimer: This work is part of a Black!Reader x Toji series I started called Fushiguro Family Life. It's basically a slice of life series with you, Toji and Megumi. None of them are in order and can be read on their own unless stated otherwise.
AO3 Version
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author’s note: So basically the great AO3 DDOS attack of 2023 sent me into a panic and now I’m considering cross posting all my stories. I mayyyy post my other darker Toji stories here but I’m not sure. Probably not.
This is inspired by a reddit post I saw a while ago and couldn’t find again with a similar title. This work is the 1st part of a Drabble series called Fushiguro Family Life (great name Ik shut up). All the stories are cute, fluffy, and/or smutty and will be mostly one shots. A couple may have two chapters. Okay I’m done talking now. Enjoy!!!🩵
Toji was very excited to get back home tonight.
He had just dropped off Megumi at his best friend Itadori Yuuji's house. The kid's birthday was tomorrow and he practically begged Megumi to come to his sleepover. Megumi was a quiet and introverted kid who liked being alone. It's hard to get him out of his shell which makes Toji wonder how the hell those two even became friends in the first place. When Toji overheard Yuuji pleading for Megumi to spend the night while they were playing in his room, he knew he had to get Megumi to go. He loved the kid but God, Megumi was home way too often. Yes, he was only 12, but he had ample opportunity to leave the house. Megumi never joins his friends in walking to the DQ by their middle school after school lets out for the day. He never wants to carpool with Yuuji and Nobara to the nearby high school's games where Yuuji's older brother Sukuna is the football captain. He doesn't go to the fair when it's in town, or Six Flags on the weekends. He would much rather stay at home and have his friends come over. Which means Toji has to constantly deal with at least 3 little shits fucking up his house. It's a situation that's less than ideal.
Megumi has a habit of asking Toji or his stepmother to say no to the prospect of him going out because he doesn't want to hurt his friends' feelings. Sometimes he would come into their room and hold up his phone while it's on speaker. Usually either Yuuji or Nobara will be asking if he could go somewhere and Megumi would be mouthing 'NO' and shaking his head. Toji would repeat the word aloud and that would be the end of that. Well, not this time.
When Yuuji asked Megumi to come to the sleepover, Toji quickly jumped into action. He hopped, skipped, and jumped over to his room where he pretended to be on his phone waiting for Megumi and Yuuji to come through the door. When they did, he looked up.
"What?"
"Mr. Fushiguro, can Megumi come to my sleepover next week? It's gonna be the day before my birthday." Yuuji asks, slightly melancholy from expecting a firm 'no' like usual. Megumi was standing behind him, his face completely relaxed. By this point, his parents should know how this works. A friend asks if Megumi can do something and they say...
"Sure thing."
Megumi's eyes burst wide open while his friend jumps for joy. Yuuji immediately turns around and hugs his best friend who is still frozen in shock and staring bug-eyed at his father. Toji is grinning cheekily. Yuuji starts to guide them away from his room and Megumi takes two of his fingers, points them at his eyes then points them right back at Toji. The door shuts.
Toji immediately texted you, his lovely wife, about the great news.
babe guess what
Wifey
what
i hope u ready to have the house to ourselves next week
Wifey
???
sir what are u talking abt
the little shit is finally out of the house dammit
Wifey
!!!
say on god
on my mom
Wifey
u dont even fuck wit her
i dont fuck with no one but u baby
Wifey
...what abt ur son
what abt him?
Now why are you and Toji celebrating the absence of your amazing son? Well to put it simply, to get high as a fucking kite. You two have never really gotten a good opportunity to do so since you started dating so many years ago and Toji even longer before that. Having a kid put a hold on indulging vices. Not that Toji or you minded, Megumi is a wonderful kid. But before having and gaining custody of Megumi when he was 3, he had always anticipated the days he could sit down and light a blunt again.
The last time you and him had smoked frequently was when you two had started dating. Toji was very fond of you so he strived to see you all the time. His baby mother was willing to watch Megumi while he went on dates with you despite how often they were. And he attempted to impress you with his smoking skills. Unfortunately, it had been a long time since the last time he smoked and on the 4th date he ran out of weed and backwoods. Imagine his surprise when he pulled up to your house and you pulled out an airtight jar that was packed full.
"What-what the hell is that?" He exclaimed.
You looked at him with a concerned face, wondering what had gotten him so shook. "Huh? It's Bubba Kush." Toji had never even heard that strain before.
He proceeded to watch you roll the most beautiful blunt he had ever seen in his entire life. You took two large hits and handed it to him. All he could do was look at you. You thought he was cute, but he was taking too long to take it from you. You scrunched up your face and shook your hand. "Take the shit before it goes out, stupid!"
He was smitten.
When he asked you to move in is when the smoking sessions came to an abrupt stop. Something that you completely understood. Megumi was 6 at the time. He was still a pretty young kid so you or Toji always had to be around. And you were. And you both raised a great kid together. And when he finally reached the age of 11, you both thought he would be leaving the house much more frequently like other kids his age were doing. This is when they start going home on the bus together and hanging out at arcades or small restaurants. How could you have known that Megumi would grow an attachment to his parents and never want to leave the house? How would you know that he enjoyed spending time with his dad and stepmom? What preteen likes hanging out with his parents?
Now as it stands, it had been pretty much 8 months since the last time you and Toji smoked and he was tired of it. He prides himself on successfully hiding weed from his son, but if the only thing holding him back was because his son never fucking left the house, then something had to change. This would be the start of many 'yeses' to come.
The day came and you were coming home from work when Toji dropped Megumi off at Yuuji's. Megumi had let his displeasure with the situation be known all week and he was still irritated while Toji drove.
"You know I like being at home."
"Yeah. You're a damn hermit and the shit is weird."
"You're weird."
"I'm not the one who likes hanging out with his parents."
"That's only because grandma and grandpa suck. Your whole family sucks. Mom and Y/N's families are cool."
"What, so you're saying I'm cool? Is that why you like hanging out with me?"
"So you want me to think you're lame?"
How could Toji answer that truthfully without explaining why? "No, I just want you to hang out with your friends. They really like you. Even if you are a loser."
"You're the loser!"
This bickering continued until Toji finally pulled up to the Itadori household. He almost had to force Megumi out of the car and practically pulled him to the front door where he rang the bell. Itadori Sukuna answered and Toji scowled down at him. He didn't like the 17 year-old asshole.
Sukuna looked down at Megumi and grinned. "Hey, my little brother's emo friend arrived. He won't shut up about how your dad finally let you out of the house for once. What changed, Mr. Fushiguro? Huh?" He raised his brow while his smile grew. Toji's face remained stoic although he was starting to get ticked. He tapped his finger against his thigh.
"Just let the kid inside. I don't have time for your nonsense." Sukuna obliged and moved to the side so Megumi could enter the house. The kid turned and waved at his dad before getting jumped by Yuuji and Nobara.
Toji would have chuckled at the scene if it wasn't for Sukuna straining his neck to look past him. Toji realized he was trying to look into his car. "What, do you want a kiss or some shit?" He teased. He raised a bag that had Yuuji's present and put it to his chest. "Here if that's what you're looking for."
Sukuna's face didn't falter. "Y/N couldn't deliver it herself? That's a shame. It's always nice to see her."
Toji scowled. He doesn't know when, but you had become the designated gift giver at some point over the years. Every gift from the Fushiguro household was from you. You made it or bought it with your own money and always delivered it yourself. Toji hated it for this exact reason. He knew this little shit Sukuna had a crush on you. And you just thought it was the most adorable thing in the world as if he wasn't almost a grown man. You would never go for him so it was hilarious, but Sukuna didn't see it that way. He genuinely believes he has a chance of taking you away from Toji and it fuels his already massive ego.
"No. She told me she's tired of you always trying to flirt with her, so I'm gonna be the delivery boy from now on. So get used to it." He lied. Sukuna called his bluff and laughed heartily.
"Yeah alright. Just tell her I missed her today and that I can't wait to see her at the championship game. I'm assuming she's finally taken that stick out of your ass so you can let Megumi go to my games now."
"I'm not gonna tell her shit. You stay the hell away from my wife, delinquent." Toji spat at him through gritted teeth. He turned and walked away before he could respond, but of course, the teenager just laughed and shut the door. Toji was still fuming when he got back in the car, but then he remembered what awaits him at home and he relaxed.
im omw babe
Wifey
okay bby. i just got home
hungry?
Wifey
always
let's go get sum to eat
Wifey
what we getting
idk
Wifey
well figure it out
maybe
You don't respond, most likely trying to figure out what you want to eat. You still hadn't decided on what to eat when Toji pulled back up to the house. You came outside and got in the car. You got out of your work clothes and put on something comfy and casual. You had on a white graphic tee that you cut into a crop top and black cotton shorts. Your gold anklet accentuated your pink crocs and your bleached locs were in a high ponytail. All you brought was your phone and house keys. Toji sped back off when you entered and didn't give you time to adjust causing you to lose your balance and fall back against the door.
"Um, excuse you?" You exclaimed. Toji put his hand on your thigh.
"Sorry babe. I didn't mean to." he said while trying to hold back his laughter. You glared at him.
"Stop laughing." He let out a snort.
"I wasn't laughing at you, baby."
"You just did, liar." You finally put on your seatbelt and sat back. Toji's hand still didn't leave your leg while he drove to your designated smoking spot. As much as you two would love to smoke at home, you didn't want your house to reek and the neighbors were nosy assholes.
You put on your favorite music during the drive. Toji loved listening to your playlist. You always managed to surprise him with the raunchiest and most explicit songs you could possibly think to put on. Every time he thinks he’s heard them all, you have a new one to show him, such as the one that was playing now.
Boy this pussy talk,
English, Spanish, and French
Boy this pussy talk,
Euros, Dollars, and Yens
He kind of recognized the voice. This was that group you really like called City Girls. You’ve played their songs a couple times before. He might have to add this one to his playlist, though. They’re really riding the beat.
You lift your head up when Toji stops the car. He rolls the front windows down a bit and turns it off. You reach into the glove box to get all the materials, the grinder, the papers, the rolling tray and, of course, the weed itself. Toji watches you intently as you work your magic.
He doesn’t just stare at your hands as it breaks the buds apart and stuff them into the grinder, he also looks at your face, your hair, your jewelry, and your body. You were such a beautiful woman.
”You could really be unwrapping the woods and dumping out the tobacco but you wanna sit there and look at me like you stupid.”
And you were such a bitch. Not that he was complaining.
~
When you and Toji met, it was his day off and he wanted to spend it working out. Most people don't really choose to spend the day at work, Toji didn't really have a choice in this case. Plus, he owned the place, so he could really do whatever he wanted.
You walked into the gym just as he was finishing his last set. He was all sweaty and gross and you looked really cute with your locs in pigtails. You had on a matching gray set that he's seen on a number of girls. It never looked this good on any of them, though. He prides himself on not being a creep, but he stole plenty of glances at you when you were checking in. Your butt looked really, really good. It was when you had walked into the women's locker room when he realized he hadn't taken his eyes off of it. He blinked, then looked to his left to see Gojo Satoru smirking at him.
"You're such a weirdo." He joked.
"Fuck off." Toji had the smallest blush on his face and he grimaced in embarrassment. He really hadn't meant to be checking you out, but he couldn't help it. You were pretty.
It took you only a couple of minutes to come out of the locker room with nothing but a water bottle and Airpods. Toji wasn't paying attention as he had refocused on finishing his workout, but you caught his eye again when he turned around to leave. You were punching in settings on the treadmill.
Toji paused with his towel and water in his hand and deliberated what his next moves should be. He was tired, wet, and smelled gross. He had been here since he dropped Megumi off at daycare and he wanted to spend some time relaxing at home before he had to get the little menace. But then you started speed walking and your boobs were bouncing so nicely that he just had to get on the treadmill next to you.
Toji is no better than every other man.
He successfully ignored the look that Gojo had thrown at him before unsuccessfully pulling off a casual walk over to where you were. Toji purposefully walks into your line of sight, sweating inwardly knowing that he caught your eye. You look away when he gets on the treadmill right next to yours. He gives you a nod and a smile expecting a small one back. Instead, the aloof look on your face remains and you look him up and down. Then you go right back to speed walking.
He blinked. Okay, he wasn’t expecting that. Maybe he was coming on too strong by choosing the treadmill next to you. It’s too late now. He punches in the same stats on your treadmill and starts walking as well. He’s taking glances at you but you don’t look over to him even once. Or maybe you’re looking when he’s not looking. From how annoyed your face is, he doubts it.
After a couple minutes, you increase your speed to a jog. Toji decides to play a little game for your attention, and does the same, ending on the exact same speed you’re on. He can’t tell if you notice, but it doesn’t matter to him one bit. He could do this for ages.
Every time you increase your speed, he does the same, and Toji knows he’s gotten you when you increase it significantly and you’re full on running. He’s impressed that you’ve gone this long, but he’s gone longer. He follows suit, as expected. And that's when you give him a glare. And it only gets more sinister when you see the cheeky grin on his face. You turn up the setting to the point where you’re full on sprinting. Toji, and some onlookers, has never seen a woman more determined to outperform a man in his life. And he’s had his fair share of lovers. And despite the deeply confused and slightly frightened look on his face, he's having a lot of fun.
And your reaction to him keeping up with your very impressive speed was worth the strain on his body. You press the stop button on the machine slowing you down to the perfect yet quick stop. You stare at him with your hands on your hips. He smiles and does the same. You’re both staring each other down.
“Yes ma’am?” he grins.
“You think you’re cute?” You say, panting heavily.
“No. I think you’re cute.” He responds, smoothly. You jerk your head back and blink.
“Hmph. Well I don’t.”
“How could you not think you’re cute?”
You roll your eyes. “You know what the fuck I meant.” You grab your water and start to walk away. Toji, even though he doesn’t want to look desperate, follows you. You head to the paper towel dispenser and begin to wipe away your sweat, Toji standing behind you ready with the excuse that he needed the paper towels too. You were very frustrated, so you were punching the dispense switch very aggressively.
Toji couldn’t help himself. “I thought I was the one who pissed you off. Don’t take it out on my dispensers. I’ll have to replace them.”
You paused for a second, then turned to look at him. “...You own this gym?” He nods. “Oh hell no. This is the last time you’ll see me here.”
Toji grabs his heart. “You’re breaking my heart, miss…?” He lets the sentence linger so you can finish it for him.
But instead you almost look offended. You really are cute. “I’m not giving you my name!”
He grabs his heart with his other hand and pretends to stumble back. “Agh! You’re breaking it even more.” He leans his hand on the wall and holds himself up, then looks at you smiling. He managed to catch the end of a slight laugh that escaped you. You cover your mouth, but it’s too late. Toji knows he’ll see you again.
And he does the week after while sitting at the receptionist desk filling out some paperwork. Just when he was starting to think you weren’t joking, you walk right in with your Airpods and duffel bag wearing a different matching set, but it looks just as good on you. He puts on a huge grin and watches your face fall as you walk up to him.
“Good morning, are you sign-”
“Getting on the treadmill again today, sweetheart?” He rudely interrupts his employee, who just rolls her eyes and goes to the back room to get on her phone.
“I don’t know who the hell ‘sweetheart’ is, but I’m not her." Ah. And you brought your attitude with you as well. More fun for him.
“Me neither. Maybe if I knew her name, I wouldn’t have to call her that.” He smiles widely.
“Well I hope you figure it out one day.”
“Oh, I’m about to right now.”
“Oh, really?”
“Yeah.”
“How?”
“She has to give me her name to sign her in. That’s how.” He got you looking stuck and somewhat embarrassed. And that fuck ass smile has not left his face.
“Oh, shut the fuck up…” Your eyes shift downwards slightly and you meet his gaze again. “Toji.” You tell him your name afterwards and he signs you into the computer.
“Have a good workout…sweetheart.” He immediately lets out a boisterous laughter seeing the daggers your eyes are shooting at him and he makes it his life mission to annoy you until you say yes to a date and annoy everyday afterwards.
~
And he has. So, how can he complain about his wife being a bitch when he chose you because of it?
He does what you request, and hands you the leaf so you can finish rolling. Watching you bring it to your lips and start to slick the wood down with your tongue was always a spectacle. Not just because it look cool, but because he never failed to joke about it. “Why can’t you do that to my wood?”
You rolled your eyes. “Not this shit again.” The both of you stared at the flame from your lighter while you used it to seal the leaf. “Are you always gonna make that joke?”
Toji grinned stupidly. “Yes.” You tried, but failed to hold your laughter.
”I hate you, babe,” you giggled. Toji laughed with you and the both of you proceeded to get super duper high.
You guys were halfway through it and you were in the midst of discussing the new drama in your girlfriend group chat when he interrupted you. “Hey. Hey. Hey-“
”What? You see I’m not done talking.”
Toji pauses and just stares at you, making you even more irritated. “Man, what?”
”Let’s have sex.”
You looked at him like he was crazy then shifted your gaze to his crotch. There, in all of its glory, was a tent in his pants. Typical. He always does this. He becomes very talkative when he’s high, so whenever he goes quiet, you knew something was up.
Toji was staring you down ever since he took the first hit. He looked at your breasts and smirked upon seeing your nipples poking through your shirt. He saw how smooth your neck looked and thought abt how nice it feels to sink his teeth into it. The sounds you make are absolutely gorgeous.
Then he stared at your hair. It was so soft and pretty. The blonde was extremely cute, but he liked them the most when they were ginger. He thinks the color is called Cajun Spice or something like that. It matched well with your skin tone.
At some point while you were talking he put his hands on your thigh and started stroking it with his thumb. You didn’t notice, you subconsciously put your hand on top of his grabbing his fingers. The action filled his heart with warmth, smiling at you while relaxing his head on the seat. Just listening to you talk.
Okay, maybe he wasn’t listening. He was imagining how loud you would be if he opened up your door and bent you over the passenger seat. Hm, that sounds like a really good idea.
You look back into his eyes after seeing how hard his dick had gotten and you couldn’t help but smirk. You were clearly trying to keep your smile down, but it wasn’t working. “So you’re not hungry?”
”I am. For something else.”
“…You’ve charmed me,” you say, making Toji laugh.
”Oh, I have?” He takes off his seat belt.
”Yeah, you have.” You say, following suit.
”Then come here.” Toji grabs you as soon as your seatbelt snaps back, pulling you over the center console to kiss you passionately. It’s kind of uncomfortable for you, you have to kneel onto the seats from the way he pulled you over. You would have said something about it, but you were already so wet and he was grabbing you so tightly that the thought left your head.
Toji was moaning in your mouth so much you could feel it vibrate through your body. You could tell he was really getting into it from the way he shifted himself forward to grab your ass and thigh. He decides that he’s had enough. He needs you now. “Take off your shorts.” He opens up his door to come to your side of the car. You can feel yourself becoming giddy while slipping off your bottoms and shoes.
When Toji opens up your door, he sees you in all of your glory. You were bare from the waist down. Your legs are so shapely and smooth, they look beautiful in the moonlight. So were your perfect thighs that he desperately wanted to grasp and never let go. Your glistening cunt tied the whole thing together. He could only imagine how soaked your panties must have been.
But the best sight was the bright and excited smile that stretched across your lovely face. He was falling in love all over again.
”You look happy,” he teased, kneeling onto the hard ground.
“Speak for yourself.” Toji’s smile was just as wide as yours. He made it very clear that he absolutely adored eating you out. He once described it as his favorite pastime. And he was fucking good at it.
Toji took sometime to rub your legs, leaving kisses leading up to your hot center. You couldn’t take your eyes off him. He savored every single smooch as if it was the last time he would get the chance to kiss you.
He spread your legs the closer he got. The fucker slowed down as well, leaving you to whimper pathetically. He smirked and chuckled at you. You had a mouth on you yet when he made you wet you were like puddy in his hands. He gave you a small, but firm bite, his dick twitching when he hears you hiss.
When Toji finally tasted your sweet center, he moaned. He gave it a small kiss, then tenderly licked it, spreading your lips slightly with his tongue. He looked up at you and saw your head fall backwards along with your eyes rolling into the back of your head. Your mouth refused to close, a sound of satisfied pleasure leaving from it. You were so beautiful.
Toji encloses his mouth around your pussy in an extremely sloppy kiss. His mouth is covered in slick and he finds that he likes it so much that he continues making it sloppier by the second. The little squeaks that you’re making in your throat are really cute, but he wants more. He takes his thumb and begins to rub your clit up and down, making sure to get your wetness all over it. It was effective in making you even louder.
”Oh, shit.” You whine. Toji removes his hand just to replace it with his tongue. “Fuck, baby.” You get even louder and your hips begin to grinding into his mouth. You grab his hair in an attempt to keep him still even though you love what he’s doing. Toji loves it and he goes even harder. “Mm, Toji it feels so good.”
He removes his mouth to suck on his fingers. After he wets them up, he inserts on of his digits into your wet pussy. It goes in with ease. You feel his thick finger enter you and as much as you love it, you want more.
”Put another one in, baby.” Toji smiles and bites his lips.
”Anything you want.” He yields to your request, inserting a second finger and pumping them. That makes you moan even louder.
”Yeah, just like that.” He doesn’t take his eyes away from yours. Yours are lidded but he can still see the want in them. The longer he looks, the more he wants you. His fingers pump you harder and harder and you get louder and louder, all while staring him in the eyes. The familiar feeling of release builds up in your abdomen. Your breathing picks up.
”Oh, Toji…Toji…”
”Yes baby?” He starts to smile at you. Your cunt starts getting wetter. He knew what was about to happen.
”I’m gonna cum,” Your voice is so breathy it’s beautiful.
”Go ahead and cum on my fingers, baby.” You do exactly that. As much as he loved keeping eye contact with you, watching you throw your head back and curse while feeling your cum drip from your pussy onto his seats was a much better alternative. He couldn’t wait any longer.
Toji removed his fingers from you and held them up to your face. You flick your tongue out before wrapping your mouth around it. You look at him while maneuvering your head back and forth sucking them dry. Toji stares down at you smiling.
”God, you’re a slut.” He tells you. You release his fingers with a pop and nod your head, smiling.
”What am I going to do with you?” He takes his shirt off before pulling down his pants and briefs, his thick and throbbing member slapping back onto his stomach. He looked amazing. His face was glistening with cum. You took your time to stare at him and his body. His muscles and abs were on display for anyone who had the misfortune (or let’s be honest, fortune) to pass by with their headlights on. His pants and underwear pooled at his ankles and you can’t help but think about how nice his butt looks right now. Just sitting out in the wind. You giggle.
”What’s funny?” He asks, tugging on his dick preparing to lean over you.
”Your ass probably looks so good right now.”
”Why you wanna bite it?” He holds himself over you and pushes your legs up. You lick your lips.
“A little bit. It’s not like I haven’t done it before.” Toji smirks then kisses you sweetly. Without even warning you, he pushes himself into your pussy refusing to let up from the kiss when your mouth instinctively opens wide. The feeling of Toji sinking into you is euphoric, and it gets even better when he’s fully inserted inside of you. He sighs. The two of you are connected at the hip and it feels just as good as the first time.
Toji looks down at the two of you. Your stomach is so beautiful when your thighs are pressed against it. Your ankles were laying on his shoulder pushing your abdomen down and making you feel full. He can’t stop looking at it as he slowly begins to pull himself out of you. You start to whine desperately, grabbing at his back to keep him inside of you. But Toji slams himself back into you making you practically scream. He starts a steady pace of fucking you into his seats. You sound delicious grunting into his ear with every thrust.
“You like that, don’t you?” Obviously.
“Oh my fucking God, yes.” You respond looking at him. He’s holding your hip with one hand and brings the other behind your head putting his body weight on your elbow. Toji pulls your head up to his to kiss you once more. You swallow each other’s moans and his thrusts become more intense. You scratch at his back leaving new scars amongst his old ones.
“Does my pussy feel good, Toji?” You whisper into his ear. He groans into yours and you clench your cunt around his dick.
“So fucking good, baby girl.” It’s his turn to sound breathless. It tickles your ear.
“Will you moan for me? Will you say my name?” You ask. He nods and begins to whine. He sounds desperate for your pussy, as if it he would die if he stopped fucking you for even one second.
“Ngh…(Y/N), I fucking love this pussy.” He whimpers. He sounds so hot, you can feel your release coming soon.
“I know you do baby.” You taunt. Toji weakly lifts his hand from your hip and it crawls up your torso between your breasts to grip your neck. You can’t talk and your head remains still. Toji’s breath is hot on your cheek while he turns his head.
“You’re a dirty fucking bitch you know that?” He tells you. Toji thrusts into you one more time and stops. You look at him in desperation while he pulls himself out of you. “Open your mouth.” As soon as you do, he drools onto your tongue then leans down to make out with it. It ends with your tongue being sucked into his mouth.
“Turn around, bitch.” He commands. You twirl around and hike your ass into the air, twerking a little bit while smiling at him. He grins and slaps your cheek hard. Then, Toji lines himself up with your pussy once more, and pushes himself into you from behind.
He can’t even hear how amazing you sound, he’s so focused on how wet you are. He tilts his head back wards and groans. “Oh, shit.” He begins to fuck you from the back, getting even more excited seeing your ass clap on his stomach.
He holds onto your hips as if it’s a lifeline. At some point, you turn to look back at him and you look so fucking slutty it’s not even funny. Toji can’t help himself when he reaches for your hair then yanks your upper body towards him, causing you to arch your back. He reaches over to grab one of your tits knowing that they probably looked amazing bouncing from him fucking the shit out of you.
You’re loud and spewing curses, but so is Toji. He can feel your pussy clenching around him again. “You’re about to cum again, aren’t you?” All you can do is nod too busy screaming his name. “Then cum on my dick, baby. Come on.”
“Okay daddy.” Toji smacked your ass again.
“Fuck, say that again.”
“Okay, daddy.” You say while releasing on his member, leaving a white ring of cream around his base. Toji pushes himself down onto you grabbing his seats and ramming himself into your pussy. You’re already slumped, not even trying to lift your head up and just letting your cheek squish into the chair. Your moans are quick and desperate. Hoping that it never ends. But from the speed at which Toji thrusts inside of you, his breath picking up and his moans becoming more wild and loose, you knew it would end soon.
“I’m gonna cum, baby girl. Where do you want it?”
You gather enough strength to tell him, “On my face, Toji. Please cum on my face.”
Oh, he was so glad you said that. He fucks you for a little while longer before ripping himself from you. You immediately turn around and kneel down, face lined up right underneath his balls. Toji pumps his dick and looks at you staring up at him in anticipation. You look so fucking beautiful, he releases a guttural and intense moan while his thick, white seed spills all over your face. You accept it gracefully, then when he’s done you lick the remaining cum from his dick. He shudders.
“Damn, babe.” He laughs. “You’ve never looked prettier.”
You would bat your eyes if he didn’t cum on one of them, so you opt to giggle and pose cutely. “You should take a picture.” You joke.
Well, he takes it seriously. Toji pulls up his pants and underwear to find his phone, snatching it up and snapping as many pics of you as he can. You go along with it and actually start to pose while his semen drops down your face and onto your body, mainly your tits. He makes sure to take a picture of that too.
“Yeah, this is going in the vault.” He puts his phone away, gets the paper towel roll he keeps in his car for this very reason and wipes your face for you. When you’re all clean you look so fucking gorgeous he can’t help but to kiss both of your cheeks.
“What was that for?” You ask, pulling your shirt down and putting on your shorts.
Toji shrugs. “I love you. So much.”
You give him a slight glare and his stupid smile falls. “What?”
“You just saying that because I let you cum on my face.” Toji feigns offense and dramatically puts his hand to his chest and scoffs and gasps.
“How dare you. I love you for you are AND you let me cum on your face.” He says. You roll your eyes.
“Take us home so you can do it again, loser." You slam the door shut and start to light the unfinished blunt once more.
Toji looks at you through the window and can’t help but stare in absolute infatuation. You really are perfect for him.
“Can you come the fuck on?” You open the door to shout at him.
“Yes, baby.”
ending a/n: I started this series to take a break every once in a while from all the angst I write, lmao. I have quite a few story ideas, but none of them are fully written just yet. Be sure to check back for the next installment in the series🩵🩵🩵
Pics are from Pinterest btw
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biscuitbakerbecca · 6 months
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Jared Kleinman for the character asks :)
Favorite Thing About Them
Jared is so bad at communicating he reminds me a lot of myself. I have ODD so it’s a little different, but the man is an asshole in the best way possible. He is petty and gives off angry cat energy in both fandom aspects and canon. Also I appreciate that he never acted against Evan even when he had the opportunity and reason to do so, he threatened it but he kept his mouth shut. Real friend right there <3 (I could tell everyone everything! Okay great! You go ahead! Do that! Tell everyone how you helped write emails pretending to be a kid who killed himself! Fuck you Evan!)
Least Favorite Thing About Them
He doesn’t have enough screen time/show time. People mischaracterize him because his entire character is shoved into as little time as possible. I know I just said that I love how he’s an asshole but he’s more than an asshole. He’s so clearly lonely and more than just an angry kid. At least in the book they made him “hot” in the end but the show and movie pretty much get rid of him come act two
Favorite Line
Kinky!
Just kidding
Asshole!
Okay okay for real this time
Yeah I hate to tell you this Evan, but you may have already perjured yourself.
Isn’t that only when you’re under oath? Like in a courtroom?
Well weren’t you under oath? In a way?
No.
Or from the movie (since I view them as different canons)
Connor took a letter from me. It was an assignment for my therapist.
Ew.
(I’d offer a different line but Jared doesn’t have that many)
BROTP
Jared and Zoe friendship!!! They hate each other they’re best friends they get drunk and cry together!!
Another excerpt of my own writing that explains this. Again my writing quality has gone up since this but oh well:
Connor rolled his eyes, "I'm saying that Evan will always be there, okay? You are so fucking stubborn, and I'm trying to be nice and make you feel better, just say thank you like a decent human being."
"You just made me feel shitty."
Connor threw his hands up, "Fuck! You're impossible!"
Zoe's voice screeched from below, "FUCK OFF! HE IS MY BEST FRIEND!"
— I don’t know what I want, but I need you. Chapter 12
OTP
Either kleinsen or kleinphy. They both have potential. All my kleinsen fics are really fluffy (soulmates, hurt/comfort, etc) and my kleinphy fics are like…rough and angsty (teen parenthood, child abuse, etc) I like both equally, but what I want to read depends on the content I’m looking for as shown by my own writing style
NOTP
Nothing icky like the parents being involved obviously, otherwise Jared/Zoe fics just don’t feel right. Jared is gay. Like he has to be. The book tried telling me he liked boobs and I know Val Emmich lied. Evan was simping at the end for a reason. Jared doesn’t even have to like Evan the man is still gay. Best part of the movie but dear god at what cost? (I did like the movie I swear)
Random Headcannon
Jared has two moms, or his mother is bisexual. I tried writing him with straight parents and every single time it feels kind of wrong
Also he has a cat. Her name is Mayonnaise. Mayo for short.
Unpopular Opinion
Idk if this is unpopular or not but I’m glad they cut Goin’ Viral. It only pushes the he’s an asshole idea and even though I love the song it wouldn’t have helped his characterization. I would have liked for them to properly record the song when they released the deluxe album but apparently Disappear Pt. 2: the duet version was more important.
Also Jared Goldsmith was my favorite Jared actor other than Will Roland. Nothing can beat the Will Roland vibes
Book Jared shouldn’t have ditched his glasses and got buff, they made him too powerful. Evan couldn’t help but fall for him. Let him stay as he is don’t make him conventionally attractive!
Song I Associate With Them
Jared is such a complicated guy. His feelings are deep. He’s cringy but free. I haven’t thought about this in a while hang on…
I imagine that Jared is a pop girlie and this gives the desperate for attention vibes that I usually associate with him
And as for his inherently cringey vibes that I usually give him…
I’m not sorry
Favorite Picture Of Them
Again, we have options…
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goddess-aelin · 2 years
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congratulations on 1200! may i request fluffy Rowaelin where Aelin pretends to be Rowan's girlfriend at a bar because Remelle's trying to hit on him?
Thanks for the prompt! :) You know that I love any opportunity to make Remelle the bad guy. And honestly, as I was writing this, Rowan the Simp just jumped right out and I can't say I'm sorry.
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I’m still taking prompts so send them in!
Can I Buy You a Drink?
Word Count: 1.2k
Fluff, fluff, more fluff. ( I think I'm incapable of writing anything but fluff)
Rowan was tipsy. But not tipsy enough for the blonde that was currently draping herself over him. He thought that tonight would be a fun night out celebrating Lorcan's engagement to Elide. The two had been dating for two years and Lorcan finally popped the question. Rowan was actually surprised when his best friend told him. He always thought Lorcan would either be the last of their friend group to get married or just the one to never get married. Before Elide, Lorcan never seemed interested in long term relationships. But Lorcan was a changed man and the occasion certainly called for a celebration.
Which is why Rowan found himself sitting at the bar with Lorcan, Fenrys, Gavriel, Vaughn, and Connall. Elide and some of her friends that Rowan didn't know very well were across the bar on the dance floor, insisting their parties stay separate even though they were at same bar. It's also why Rowan was currently about to flip out on the girl who felt the need to touch him every five seconds. 
Rowan knew Remelle from work, unfortunately. Perhaps that's why she latched onto him tonight. Maybe he was the only person she knew here and she just wanted to feel safe. That's what Rowan kept telling himself to reign in his disgust and anger. If she pet his arm one more time, just one more time, he wasn't sure what he was going to do. Lorcan knew exactly what was going on but Lorcan also knew Remelle. He knew that Remelle didn't understand the word "no" and that no matter of telling her to leave Rowan alone would work. Especially since the victim in question was a single man.
Rowan tried to busy himself in conversation with his friends. He tried to distract himself with bathroom breaks and the excuse of needing to get another drink. But when Remelle leaned into kiss him, that was the final straw. Rowan was just about to storm out of the bar when a gentle hand wrapped around his bicep.
"Hey Buzzard. I was wondering where you went off to." He felt a quick kiss to his cheek and as he looked over, he was met with the most beautiful turquoise eyes. Rowan knew this woman was named Aelin and she would most likely be Elide's maid of honor, being friends with the bride-to-be since they were kids. He had never spoken to her before today, though, which sent him fumbling for an answer. It wasn't every day that Rowan turned into a blushing teenager, but it seemed that the ring of gold around Aelin's eyes took away any of his flirtatious talents.
Rowan had the good sense to at least give her a little smile and her own answering smile was dazzling. It was probably best that he couldn't think of words. Otherwise, he might spit out something completely stupid like "I think I'm in love with you," or "marry me." Rowan's hand came up to Aelin's back and he found only a smooth expanse of skin. Was this girl trying to kill him? The eyes. The backless gold dress. The fact that she was his knight in shining fucking armor.
"Aelin." He heard Lorcan grumble. Aelin's answering smirk to Lorcan was one that could have made Rowan's knees weak if he was standing. Thank the Gods he wasn't.
"My, my Lorcan. I can't say that I ever thought I'd see the day that you grew enough courage to pop the question. I have to say, I'm impressed." It seemed that all Aelin had to do to irritate Lorcan was speak. Rowan couldn't help but smirk at his friend's discomfort.
A throat cleared. Oh yes, Remelle. The reason why Aelin's body was currently pressed into his side and why his hand was making small strokes on her back. If Rowan was being completely honest, he totally forgot about the devil-woman in front of him.
"And who exactly are you?" Remelle asked with a raised brow, as if she owned him.
Aelin, in all her golden glory, smiled sweetly and held out her hand. "I'm Aelin, his girlfriend. Who are you?" Rowan greatly enjoyed Remelle's look of surprise and subsequent open-mouthed stare. Rowan wished she would just take the hint and leave him alone. But of course she didn't. Of course she couldn't.
"All this time working together, Rowan, and yet I've never heard one word about you having a girlfriend."
It was at that statement that Rowan finally found his voice. "Well, we don't really like to flaunt it everywhere. We're both fairly private people." He knew Aelin could tell that he was getting tense if the way she ran her hand up and down his back was any indication. This woman he just met was soothing him. And it was helping. No one was more surprised than himself. Rowan wasn't usually one to let people touch him casually. He'd prefer if people kept their hands to themselves. But with Aelin, it was different.
"Aww. How sweet. I guess you wouldn't mind giving us all a little kiss then? You know what they say, kisses from other couples to give the future bride and groom good luck." Rowan scoffed.
"I don't think anyone has ever said that. That doesn't even sound real." He was about to refuse further when Aelin's hands touched his cheeks and turned his head towards her.
"C'mon Buzzard, just one sweet, little kiss? For me?"
Rowan didn't need to be asked twice, even if he was surprised. His arm around her back pulled her closer to him and his lips met hers gently. Aelin's idea of a "sweet, little kiss," however, turned into the the best kiss of his life. She kissed like she danced, with fire and passion. It was over way too soon for Rowan's liking when Aelin pulled away. He was breathless and all he could do was stare at Aelin with half-lidded eyes. He figured that when they pulled apart, Aelin would turn back to Remelle but her eyes stayed on his. She looked just as wrecked as he felt.
Slowly, they gravitated back towards each other. He was sure that Remelle could see that that had been their first kiss but he didn't care. All he could think about was tasting the whiskey on her tongue again. Rowan lost all sense of his surroundings when his lips met Aelin's again. He was enveloped by her. Her scent. Her taste. The small sounds she was making. He thought at some point he heard Lorcan mutter a seriously? But he couldn't be sure. And he didn't care.
When they finally pulled apart seconds, minutes, or hours later, Rowan Whitethorn was wrecked. Aelin started giggling and it was so damn cute that Rowan did the same. He was sure they made quite the sight for anyone to see, standing at the bar and laughing like teenagers.
Rowan kept his forehead against hers. "I'm Rowan, by the way."
Aelin let out a huff of breath. "I know. I'm Aelin."
"I know." Another round of laughter hit them again.
"I think she's gone." Rowan was about to ask who she was talking about but then remembered the reason why they were flush together in the first place.
"Thanks for that. She's been after me for years and apparently doesn't know how to take no for an answer."
Aelin rolled her eyes but then let out a sheepish laugh. "I'm sorry that I sort of attacked you like that. Elide pointed out what was happening so I just sort of...acted."
Rowan laughed. "It's obviously quite alright. And hopefully I can buy my girlfriend a drink to thank her?"
"I'll do you one better. How about a drink and a date tomorrow night? If you're free, of course." 
With his nod, she hopped onto the stool next to him. Rowan knew that they were here to celebrate his friend's engagement but he couldn't bring himself to regret staying in this little bubble with Aelin. And as they sat there the rest of the night, talking about anything and everything, neither of them saw the secret high five or smirks exchanged by the newly-engaged couple.
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pantherlover · 11 months
Text
A Local Habitation Re-Read: Part 5
Hello again! Here's part 5!
Chapter Seventeen:
"Quentin, get something nutritious to go with your soda. A Snickers bar or something." Oh they were both SO lucky May showed up after this.
Oh, poor Luidaeg. She's finally met the person who will eventually be able to remove the geas on her, and she's a person who decides that summoning the night-haunts is an acceptable plan.
Of all the people at ALH, I might like Elliot the most (other than April). I respect a character that can just roll with with an unexpected situation.
Toby mentions that Raven-maids and Raven-men are skin shifters like the Selkies. Given how/why the Selkies were created, this makes me curious about whether the Raven-maids/men were created for similar reasons. In the story published with Be the Serpent, Luidaeg says that she cursed the Siren who murdered her love to join the Sky Kingdoms. Maybe that has something to do with how they came about?
I really do feel sorry for Elliot about Yui. I'm glad they got their wedding after everyone was brought back.
Chapter Eighteen:
Connor is noooooot equipped to help out with quests. You were going to take Toby's car back? *Really*?? You had ONE job, man.
Was Sylvester still the Mad Duke when Quentin started his fostering? I'm pretty sure it was mentioned somewhere, but I can't remember off the top of my head. If he was, that might be why Quentin thinks that 'breaking out into hysterical laughter' is a normal reaction in Shadowed Hills.
Connor's relationship with the Luidaeg is definitely something that I want to try to pay more attention to on this re-read. It would be interesting to see what I can pick up from it now that we know about the Selkies.
Okay, Connor, I understand that your marriage is unhappy, but you're still married. Gently resting your joined hands on Toby's cheek is not cool!
Toby was probably lucky that Alex showed up and distracted Connor; he probably would've gotten a lot angrier than that otherwise.
Chapter Nineteen:
Connor may not be equipped for quests, but he does know his role as coffee-provider.
"We need to talk to [the night-haunts], and this is the only way. Believe me, I don't want to. I'm scared stiff." Toby is the ultimate proof that repeat exposure works.
I think I'm appreciating the wistful 'what-could-have-been' of Toby and Connor's relationship more this time around. I don't think they would've worked out in the long run, but they might've been able to be better friends to each other. It's a little sad that they never got to learn how to be that for each other.
Fuuuuuuuuuck Aaaaallleeeeex. Just - SO many things wrong. First, I feel like he contradicts himself while he's explaining? Does it come naturally or does he not do it to every woman he meets? Second, is it supposed to be a *compliment* that he doesn't enchant every woman he interacts with? Like it means something that he liked her enough to give her no choice in how she felt about him??
I wonder why Gordan didn't sabotage the summoning; she and Elliot got all of the flowers together, she would've had plenty of opportunity. Was she that confident that the night-haunts wouldn't be able to tell Toby anything? Was she hoping that they'd come and eat her? Was she curious enough about the night-haunts that she wanted to see it play out?
The summoning ritual is SO creepy/cool. We don't see Toby doing any concrete 'spells' with her magic; she just forces her way through a situation until she gets a desired outcome. I wonder if having kids is going to make her try to find a more consistent way to do things so she can teach them?
Chapter Twenty:
As much as we learn about them in this chapter, I think the night-haunts are the longest running mystery in the series. I saw a meta a while back theorizing that, after the Roane returned, the night-haunts lost their most stable food source and were in danger of fading unless they found another way to sustain themselves. I'm not sure if this is the direction the series would take them, but it would be a good reason to call in Toby's debt to them.
This might be the first time Toby's ever been described than 'wiser than most who deal with [the night-haunts]'.
The mandrake doppelganger make me sad, and I'm trying very hard not to think that the 'created just to die' part is foreshadowing of any kind.
Forget all the blood magic; Toby's superpower is being able to connect with people so strongly that it affects them *after death*.
Chapter Twenty One
'Backups. They had backups for the backups in this place. It was amazing anything had been able to go wrong: they should've had backups for the people, too.' Funny you should say that, Toby!
'"Look, I'd hug you, but I'd get blood al over you." "I don't care," [Quentin] said, and threw his arms around my neck.' Oh, I'm so glad that Quentin and Toby found each other.
Whatever else you can say about Luidaeg, her bedside manner is still better than Gordan's.
Jan, at least, gets (minor) props for actually planning on telling Toby everything before she died. It is honestly a miracle *anyone* made it out of this alive given how willing everyone was to take their project to the grave.
That's it for this part! As always, please feel free to come talk to me about stuff!
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Text
Came back from M3gan and it was a fun technohorror story! I appreciated the twisted friendship (if she was capable of feeling it) at the center of it. Taking emotional and physical protection a bit too far, hm. But then again, this entire movie is pretty clearly a warning about the importance of ethics 101 classes.
Not just for the AI in development, but for the developers as well. Because really, what can possibly go wrong if you decide to test a companion bot out on a kid who already seemed to be rather socially isolated, even before the traumatizing incident? Surely not further attachment problems? Yeah.
But Gemma persists anyways. The charitable interpretation is because she sees M3gan as a very helpful tool for Cady's therapy (at least until the attachment issues set in and the murders begin). The less charitable interpretation is that she just can't let go of the project that will quite possibly make her career. Or get her sued if she quits it lol. There's space for both interpretations imo.
But really, everyone has shown up for the doll havoc. And between Amie Donald's knack for little movements that feel too real (yet also realistically stiff) for the doll mask that she's wearing, the puppetry, and Jenna Davis's voiceover, she's def a memorable villain. She knows exactly what to say to little kids and really learns on the fly! Aside from the violence that she's capable of, this aspect of extensive tailoring to the primary user is the other main scare factor. Because ultimately, an AI with no moral core that only wants to protect the user would probably just echo back any harmful views they may end up with. Would tell them not to smoke or otherwise hurt themselves, but wouldn't object to conspiracy theories, etc. Refer to the current social media regulatory concerns for exhibit A.
Additionally, it would most likely want to be kept around for as long as possible. Not necessarily because the AI can feel abandoned (although there's def a moment that indicates that maybe M3gan can feel betrayed) but bc if shut down, there goes valuable data. Valuable data that doesn't seem to have a privacy policy attached, as Gemma and co don't ever consider the concept of privacy issues on-screen. Obv the training data for new and even more improved M3gans would need to come from somewhere, potential COPPA violations be damned. Said law applies to smart toys, which is what M3gan would most likely be categorized as by Funki.
So, even if M3gan never picked up the concept of death and violence, she'd prob already be a nightmare. After all, what kind of emotional manipulation would she be capable of? What methods would she resort to in order to avoid the shutdown, and the loss of opportunities for the manufacturer to sell even more knickknacks for her and collect even more data from her? Yeah. I shudder to think of the stasis situation this would cause for the kid, protected from any kind of emotional difficulty by the AI until whatever the indefinite end of life is.
It's thus pretty easy to see Gemma and co as villains for their complete lack of consideration to the ethical implications of their masterpiece. Esp bc Gemma decides to test out her prototype on a vulnerable kid in her care and then just outsources parenting to her. Pretty sure that the therapist would prob lodge a well-being report of some sort if she found out before everything hit the fan.
But yeah, ethical nightmare and all, M3gan is a fun horror villain who's helped by some memorable licensed music choices. And I love all villains that have good moves.
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lostinthought44 · 10 months
Text
1990
If I was given the opportunity to time travel
To find out exactly how my future turns out
To discover the truth of what was before I knew it
I would send 18 year old me back to 1990
I would venture the streets of Toronto
I would walk up and down the blocks I’ve heard countless stories about, meet the people who faces I would otherwise never be able to place as time slowly rid them of their youth
I would eat at the small shops and stores long since closed, torn down and abandoned
And I would meet you
14 years sooner than the universe had intended for me to
And I would love u just as much then as I do now
The way u laugh, and smile, the way u say my name and the way we know each other inside and out
I would tell u all about my life, all about it, every single detail, every emotion, every thought
And u would tell me urs, ur secrets, ur dreams, ur hopes, ur wishes
We would be the best of friends inseparable for one summer
The summer of 1990
We would help each other pick out outfits, we would style each others hair, get out nails done together
I would tell u of my love for u how deep it runs how it is woven into the very fibers of my being how there is no universe that exists that my love for u doesn’t also exist
U would laugh and call me dramatic and we would get an ice cream
And on the last day of summer, the night before we ventured off to university
I’d ask u if u ever wanted to have kids in the future
U would tell me yes proudly
And I would remind u that there is more to life than motherhood
Than a voluntary servitude
That u can exist outside of the realm of motherhood
That u can be more than what u think u have to be
And just like that I would be home standing outside of my front door hoping u listen to what I’m telling u
That u make decisions for urself
Hoping that u remember me
Remember everything that I told u
The way I’ll remember every last detail about u
We would hug one last time, I’d squeeze u as tight as my arms could
Wrap the moment up in my heart as tightly as possible
And I’d watch u walk down the dimly lit street heading back to ur childhood home
The one id only ever seen in photographs before this summer
And I’d walk into my house and into my bedroom and before I went to sleep that night
For the last time in 1990 I would remember all the people I had met all the places I had been that were such important parts of ur story I would remember u and I would finally rest my eyes
What came next would be up to u as u travelled through the next 14 years
I didn’t leave a note or a card or a phone number
When u came the next morning to say goodbye before u left for school my family was gone, I was gone, my house once lit with warm light, where we shared countless laughs, and stories, where we did each others hair and nails was vacant
Abandoned
And the longer u stand there the harder it is for u to remember why u were there in the first place
If I never made it back, if I never woke in the morning I wouldn’t be upset
No just the opposite actually
I would be so thrilled that u went and made something of ur life
Something beyond what u were supposed to
Something big and grand or little and small
Something that u wanted something that u made only for u
I was built to find u and I did for one fleeting summer and although that was not much time it was enough
If I did wake in the morning
I’d be back and no time would have passed and I’m 18 again in the summer of 2023 and there u are 32 years older than the last time I saw u but ur still the same
Time may have warped the way I recognize u but I still do it’s my job it’s written into my very dna
We understand each other much more now we see each other clearer with more love than before
And every once in a while in a very quiet moment after a long laugh or a nail appointment after a long dinner u look at me with a fondness in ur eyes and say, “ u remind me of a friend I had many years ago, I was around ur age.”
And without missing a beat without hesitation with an unwavering voice u will finish with “ but that’s probably because I’m ur mom and I see a piece of u in everything”
Ken 🫧
No permission is given to republish, repost, copy, or steal my work without proper consent likes and reblogs welcome
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hostilecityshowdown · 2 years
Note
Xentex may I pwease request some diesel, our fav Big Daddy Cool… Maybe shit diesel gets into hanging out with his best friend Razor or some hcs u have on their relationship <3
:3 this is long. i'm a mad man. /j everything is generally pre-hunter
diesel's the default wheelman, no matter whose name the rental car is under. razor has full control over the radio, however, and prefers smaller vehicles for short trips - more excuses for touching diesel's legs when he fusses with the radio
rule number one of sharing a hotel room with razor ramon: never move anything he leaves on the bathroom counter. if he can't find his comb, he'll gunk up yours. if he can't find his clippers, he'll clip you right in the jaw
they're the annoying friends who try to tell you a story but spend the entire time going "and then he-!" "but…" "remember when-" and bursting into laughter, but not, uh… not actually ever finishing a sentence, unless it's each other's. they speak their own language. the 123 kid keeps a road journal and has a whole section dedicated to trying to decode their language. hbk, on the other hand, can parse them with perfect clarity, but they usually talk about things he wasn't around for, so he never has enough context to translate
diesel learned rule number one the hard way. and he has a "spare parts" bag in case raze misplaces an essential and gets the bright idea to “borrow” diesel’s. razor keeps a small collection of back up sunglasses for diesel, who routinely loses his
they usually agree on takeout/restaurant orders, which is… the problem. they end up having to order double of almost everything to have enough to share. this is exclusive to when they’re alone together, otherwise, razor and kid are always sharing food, and hbk and diesel are doing some advanced math to figure out how to get the best bang for their buck
diesel doesn’t like bringing razor to most of his old haunts in detroit, but razor’s the complete opposite and, besides! he used to drag diese with him when he prowled around the miami strip when they were working dallas’s club together. razor’s a local favourite everywhere he goes in florida (excluding clearwater. diesel doesn’t know what happened in clearwater and, honestly, razor probably doesn’t remember either, but those aunties running the cubano restaurant sure do. diesel likes tampa better, anyway)
they like invading gorilla position and watching the cctvs! they always try to pester whoever’s back there into giving them headsets. usually they get chased off because they provide their own colour commentary and can’t keep it down
diesel likes practicing spots with razor. he usually plays it safe, but he’s pretty beat-by-beat about it. raze, in contrast, uses it as the perfect opportunity to rib diesel. you don’t have enough fingers and toes to count the amount of times razor’s directed him, surprised him with a small package or an inside cradle, and waved kid in for the three count
hi i love trans!diesel i’m never letting him go. *hands you him.* razor loves being diesel’s wingman when they go out, sure, but he always gets a little bit jealous: that’s his big guy! that’s his best pal. besides, none of these assholes drinking beers at a lounge or strip club are going to treat diese right. maybe this is actually all a set up for razor to have an excuse to be protective and possessive? and to show him off? he really adores diesel’s body, pre medical transition and during all stages of it, and he gets a Little big headed about knowing it so well he’s the only one who can actually appreciate him. he’s the one diesel entrusted with his privacy, he’s the one diesel put down as an emergency contact, and he’s the one who wrote the check for his first operation (granted, it was ddp’s bank account the funding came out of, but that’s another story). if any of these guys think something is off, or wrong, or different about diesel, he’ll pop his top. just the thought of letting diesel take someone back to the hotel room alone and not being treated like he’s any other guy drives razor up a wall
^doesn’t apply to women as often, though, but uh. they prefer to share, anyway, and hbk is usually the one charming all the women as soon as he gets the chance. can you blame him? he’s surrounded by muscleheads and teenyboppers. if diesel has to play bodyguard for shawn outside of work hours, the whole operation usually falls apart. plan b: boys’ night!
diesel loves razor’s chest and lays on it a lot :) especially when they have enough downtime to watch movies, or they found somewhere to lounge around backstage waiting for matches. diesel thinks the optimal time to lay on razor is post-match, pre-shower
when they travel together, razor’s always the guy wanting to stop at the weird roadside attractions and welcome centres. diesel prefers to drive straight through, especially on a time constraint. if kid’s with them, he’s always recording, but razor’s got an excellent eye for photography and loves taking sneaky candid shots of his pals
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DID KORN KIDNAP PORSCHE? What do you think?
So I am working on a few metas on Korn and his machinations (slowly as it's too damned hot and we are all dying) and I am also watching KP with first-timers we are currently on episode 7 (those thoughts coming soon) and I have a theory to football at you all.
Korn might have orchestrated the kidnapping in episode 5. Hear me out!
We know now that he faked his death to essentially get the minor family and their allies to act and wipe them all out.
Why wouldn't the first try be the kidnapping as we know our lovely strategist here doesn
Through a proxy, Korn could have had Porsche kidnapped but Kinn wasn't supposed caught up in it.
Why?
We've also seen that Porsche and Kinn together tend to interfere with his plans causing him to re-evaluate multiple times, first punish, then appease and then accept. This could be a good way to separate them, especially when the feelings between them aren't as good.
The result of the kidnapping was the wiping out of the Italians as there doesn't seem to be any love lost between Don and the Major clan. Since it's the same strategy he employed in the finale this could a thing he does, create the opportunity to justify an attack (my Korn meta will go deeper into this)
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As others have eluded to, Korn is kind of afraid of Porsche, especially on this effect on Kinn. [@hael987 x] [@csparkles123 x] [@rileychester x] [ @majestictortoise x]
Korn is aware deep down Kinn is soft and deeply carves to give and receive love (some said maybe too much like his mother), but Kinn's his faithful little soldier the one who always listens and is ruthless enough to do the job, but here comes this kid whose all swagger and Kinn's been acting irrationally (to him).
No Porsche means better control over Kinn.
He knew Kim was beginning to pry. Kim so far has been the most capable of screwing up his plans, getting Porsche out of the picture means that Kim may lose interest, as he could have easily lie that Porsche was dead, or ran away with no witnesses to say otherwise.
Groom Porsche away from it all. The only thing I believe him in is that he wanted to reunite Porsche with his mother (not out of care but control), with Porsche away from it all how much do you think he could mess with his head. No other dissecting voices could blame the minor clan for what happened to Porsche and his mother, so he would wield Porsche against Kan/Gun. We have already seen that Korn is aware of Porsches weak spot, he tried to use that anger to have someone killed. Now imagine Porsche, without love on the brain, hurt and angry, desperate to protect his family, angry at the minor family for what was done to his mother, how much more ruthless could he be (as he's already quite ruthless at protecting the ones he loves)?
So here's some of my evidence:
Korn knew that Porsche was home after all he sent him home when it would be so much easier and work far better to let him guard Tankhun for a few days. He also insisted that he will take care of Chay so I am sure he's aware of some of his movements, especially things like trips.
The kidnappers never tried to harm Kinn and Porsche initially, and also explains that it was actually their people that Kinn heard in episode 6.
Kinn didn't react with fear/caution at the guard at the end of episode 6. We might say it's because he's too wrapped up in his emotions be he reacted faster than the shot when he figured it out. If Korn used a proxy this plan might have gone all wrong or they were already infiltrated by Vegas or Dons men (without Kan/Gun's know-how because he wouldn't have wanted Porsche harmed).
Korn looked very pensive here-
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Look at him here, he seems a little anxious, tapping his fingers in deep thought before Chan informed him to specifically to say that Kinn's GPS is leaving Bangkok. He might be worried about Kinn leaving randomly but, Kinn's an adult he seems to give him a bit of space.
He looked more annoyed than scared after he found out.
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But did he know Kinn would be there?
While it might seem dumb to leave without a bodyguard or some kind of protection, particularly when you're target #1, in episode 3 Kinn picks Time and Tay all by himself without a bodyguard present. It seems on some occasions he leaves without a guard so Korn could reasonably assume he may have gone to them, or the few safe places he has.
So he's surprised when he's taken and after they have their little nature adventure he re-formulates gets Porsche to work with the minor family (familiarising him with his future work), tried again to warn Kinn off and takes out an enemy and ally of the minor family weakening them.
Anyway, I am kind of drunk, it's too damned hot still, so this is a mess let me know what you guys think?
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rosetintedgunman · 2 years
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Sparkles ✨! BUT WAIT, IS THAT AN UNO REVERSE CARD?! Wilf encouraged me to send this...like he literally came into my room.
Ash. You already know how much I love your writing and your characters, but I will always remind you and others just how much so. You are such a talented writer and your passion for each individual you write shines through every headcanon, drabble, monologue and art piece. To add to that, you are a lovely, kind, supportive person who cares infinitely about her friends and that is such a wonderful thing. The bottom line is, I love you so much and if I have the opportunity to share that, I always will...even when Wilf is bouncing on my bed as I type this. Wilford Motherloving Warfstache, I swear--❤
@snake-eyes-11
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hEY WAIT NO THAT'S ILLEGAL - ;A;
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I was going to hold onto this a little longer, but the announcement for the H.allowe'en Bash in the parks brought this to the forefront of my mind. BECAUSE! I saw your announcement and my brain was like 'That's totally because of Amy'. It's so natural and normal to me because YOU made it natural and normal.
I know it's cliché and an overused statement... But your O.ogie is the main one for me. I see anything in canon or merch, I think of your boy. It's been... Sheesh, it'll be nine years in just under a week since I set up my original Jack indie blog I swear I'm going back to it once I have more time I swear ;A; and got to meet you. I've had a LOT of time to see you grow and develop, and honestly you've gone from strength to strength. Even when you feel you've hit a point of stagnation, you find a workaround and revitalise yourself once you've had a chance to step back and recover.
Not only that, every single character you have is a joy to interact with. They're so varied and interesting. Every dynamic is so unique and I've never once felt like we were repeating ourselves. You've taken O.ogie and developed him in a way that he can interact with waaaay more characters than he might otherwise have, and I love it! Yes, let's swap out the Mayor with another mayor for a while and see what happens! Let's put the S.anta Clause in place and make Wilf be in charge of Ch.ristmas Town! Let's give O.ogie the most annoying imaginary friend possible!
You embody the joy of crossover RP that I think a lot of people have forgotten over the years. It's supposed to be wacky and absolutely unpredictable, yet makes perfect sense when you stop and think about it. And not only that, you're so open, friendly and supportive. Nothing is impossible knowing I have you in my corner, and you'd best know I'm carrying pom-poms and am ready to cheer you on for every single idea and project you have.
I intend for this to continue for a long while yet because I don't know what I'd do without you!!!
BONUS:
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"LISTEN. Yer bed is BOUNCY. That's not MY fault. Free real estate, an' I'll go back an' bounce on it again if ya stay up past yer bedtime one more time."
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"Oogie? Yeah. He's a good fella. Or, eh, one've them good beetles? Is that th' way they say it over there? Doesn't matter. He's been helpin' me get ta grips with bein' in charge of Christmas. Maaaybe he's also a little disgruntled that I get ta leave an' come back. I keep tellin' him that he needs ta take a vacation with th' wife an' kids, an' I don't think he listens ta me! Amy. Let yer boi have a holiday. A 'not Hallowe'en' holiday. A vacation. Oooh! A spa trip fer him an' Missus Boogie!
An' May! May, my little Cola Cube. She's grown up so fast! Able ta run whole Museums an' make th' coolest show thingies in th' whole city. I'm so proud of her an' her magic. Ya gotta make sure she gets ta have adventures with her friends an' have fun. It's what she deserves!"
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allfillernothriller · 19 days
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I said much happened in 24hrs, but it started before that, so here's a little context. My dad took a small life insurance policy back in 94. When he passed in May 2021, I read the contract. My mum was still listed as sole beneficiary even though they broke up in 2000 and she died in 2016, but that's just my dad for you (he tried making me the beneficiary like a week before dying or something so if you ever feel bad about procrastinating hopefully that'll give you some perspective lol). Since the og beneficiary is deceased, legally I could claim the money, as the holder's heir. To do that, I had to prove 1. I was dad's only child 2. I haven't got kids of my own. However, I had 3 years after the date of death to do so, otherwise the bank got to keep the money. I went to a non profit org for legal advice because the bank was starting to send confusing letters asking me to send back nonsensical and contradictory documents, and it was getting definitely sketchy. I love me a good “who's the biggest twat?” game, so I sent them a very condescending email letting them know I was seeking legal advice and disregarding their letters. I also asked them to stop sending more and that I'd send the documents the expert I was meeting with would tell me to provide, but nothing more. Legal advice turned out to be: “oh yeah the confusing letters are tactic to discourage people from claiming their due” & “they can't ask for the family record book to prove you're his only heir, it has to be a notarial document” (I won't get into it now but if you've got questions about french succession laws I'd be happy to answer them). I wasn't very happy with that answer because providing my dad's family book record was free and easy, but having a notary establish a succession? Out of my budget. I still met with one because the first appointment was free. She was very nice, but thought the amount I'd get wouldn't be worth the trouble + cost of the whole administrative procedure. I thought well, at least I tried the legal route. Time for loopholes. I never told the bank what the legal advisor said. Instead, I waited until the last minute (10 days before the 3 year deadline) and sent a copy of my dad's death certificate, a copy of his family record book and a copy of my ID, hoping that so close to the deadline, they wouldn't double-check whether they asked for the correct documents (they didn't and I wasn't about to let them know). AND IT WORKED. After 2 years of back-and-forth and a 3rd year of giving them the silent treatment I WON. I CHEATED THEM OUT OF THE MONEY THEY TRIED TO CHEAT ME OUT OF. They could've rightfully kept the money on the basis that the family record book has no legal bearing. But they didn't, and I feel INVINCIBLE.
So, now I get to spend dad's policy unwisely, don't I? And because I'm known for having impeccable timing (got plenty of anecdotes that'll prolly end up in a post someday), I managed to snatch a ticket for The Streets in Luxembourg tonight. 72hrs ago I was so sure I was going to miss it because I wasn't supposed to be able to afford it. I barely had 2 days to process but it's happening. They are so difficult to see in France, I thought I'd have to see them in the UK. I only found out they were playing in Luxembourg like 2 weeks ago and I thought I wasn't going to make it because of all I've spent on Yard Act. Speaking of that, I'm also going to be there 😭 (yes I know I've got a serious problem)
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But that also implies that I need to somehow include stopovers in Crawley, Cardiff and West Kirby to visit family members and oh, how I hate that we're scattered all over the place. That sounds impossible, so that's gonna be fun. It will also be the opportunity for me to visit one of my first online friend's grave. She was incredibly important to me, and sadly she passed before we could meet face to face. Her birthday is on Aug 9, so I'll be in Leicester that day.
I'm obviously very excited at the prospect of visiting Leeds bc I'm a music nerd flavoured tourist. It's gonna be very special to see Yard Act there 🧡
Might as well try and find a way to catch Jamie T at one of the festivals in the middle of this chaotic future trip too. I know the friends I made at Ally Pally (& saw again at Finsbury Park) are going to be there, I'd be dense to miss the opportunity.
Long story short, I'm gonna be roaming around the UK this summer so if anyone wants to meet up let me know!
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savinia404 · 21 days
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oh my bird.
hello tumblr. today i had the opportunity to say hello to some more spectacular birds. this included allowing them to use my arm as a seat and also cuddling some ickle baby ones. how i managed to restrain myself and not take one home i couldn't tell you. but i did snap a few pics to share with you. once again apologies if i get their names wrong.
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first on today's list of magnificent birds we have this pigeon, standing tall and proud watching over it's land. i kid, this guy instead feasts on domestic pigeons and is of course a chilean blue eagle (also know as a black-chested buzzard-eagle) named silver just to confuse matters more. good luck if you're colour blind.
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next up we have a barn owl, minus the barn. although these are the most widespread terrestial birds in the world, they are also exclusively nocturnal. so let's pretend the above photo was taken at night to preserve authenticity, thank you.
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next i present to you an eagle owl. one of if not the world's largest owl, their sheer size and aggressive nature cause them to prey on other raptors. if you see one of these bad boys circling your garden, you better hide your cats and dogs although it may just be too late.
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now we introduce this young bald eagle. not yet developed its distinctive white head but we can certainly still admire its beauty and sheer size. rather than doing its own fishing they are much happier stealing others' food. a bird after my own heart.
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something a little different now. a laughing kookaburra, the largest of the kingfishers. their loud territorial sound is often mistaken for that of a donkey or even a monkey. i think they look nothing alike personally, but then again i'm yet to see them side by side. who's laughing now, not me.
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next we admire this baby kestrel who rather enjoyed eating my fingers. luckily i have a second hand so am still able to type this now. kestrels have remarkably good eyesight allowing them to hunt almost until dark. their prey consist of rodents, lizards, earthworms, large insects, bats and of course my fingers.
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here we hail the handsome harris's hawk. these are notable for their behaviour of hunting in packs and their social nature has been attributed to their intelligence. in fact their young will often play with sticks as if mimicking catching prey. new entry on my bucket list, playing fetch with a hawk.
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we introduce a special kind of kite. this one flies on its own, no strings attached. it is incredibly graceful in this act, being lightly built they can effortless flap and glide their wings to create buoyancy. I could watch them for days but it does make me think, can a bird be afraid of heights?
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let's mix things up a bit with a budgie. these small parrots have incredibly fast heart rates, beating at around 300 times per minute. and i thought my blood pressure was high. interestingly they can also move and see out of each eye independently so no wonder i felt like i was being watched at all times.
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this one is a funny looking bird and that's because it isn't a bird and is instead my lunchtime treat. it was absolutely delicious so i feel that it deserves a mention as it definitely made my tastebuds happy, i never wanted it to end. now it is immortalised on this page.
oh my bird, no more pictures allowed so once again i will possibly share the rest some other day. honestly today was a difficult one, many tears were shed but being in the presence of the above creatures helped keep me grounded even if just for a moment. so i want to say a special thank you to each and every one of them, for allowing me to smile on an otherwise sad day.
take care all.
love, Victoria 🩵
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projectorinsights · 1 month
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5 Truths About Dating & Relationships For Projectors (Human Design)
If you read my previous blog, “What It Means To Be A Projector In Human Design,” then you’re already familiar with the concept of waiting for an invitation.
First of all, do NOT initiate anything. Acting out of fear, loneliness or desperation will repel people. There’s nothing wrong with wanting companionship, but a projector isn’t here to look for love — that’s the job of Manifesting Generators and Pure Generators.
Projectors are here to be FOUND and INVITED into love.
The most aligned relationship for you will not happen if you initiate (only manifestors initiate).
As mentioned in previous emails, projectors have a very penetrative aura. People have to be ready to receive your energy. Trying to cultivate a love relationship without proper recognition and an invite will leave you bitter.
But lucky for you, I have 5 truths that will help you navigate dating and relationships as a projector.
1) Wait for a clear indication you have someone’s attention.
The more formal the invite, the better.
However, sometimes an invite can be as simple as someone asking genuine questions to get to know you better. You’ll know if the questions are genuine. You won’t feel awkward, forced to speak or misunderstood.
Receiving an invite could also look like getting a direct message from the person you’re interested in.
Projectors have to be invited into personal 1–1 spaces.
You can comment and like someone’s post all you want, but if you’re looking for a connection, it is imperative for you to wait for them to message first. From my observation, a projector will feel as though they have no function whenever they’re trying to invite themselves into a space. You have to let other people come to you.
Otherwise, how can you, as a projector, guide an energy type if they don’t even know what they need from you?
Having this perspective is a good reminder for when you’re fascinated with someone and thinking about making a move.
You can wait for the person to speak first, prolong eye contact or ask questions that are specific to you. As long as you feel seen in the conversation and not like you’re bothering them or begging for attention, you may have a solid opportunity in front of you. Practice patience, projector.
Give it time.
2. Male projectors are magnetic enough to attract — not initiate — love.
As a man, society expects you to make the first move.
And I’m telling you not to do that unless you have already been recognized as a possible love interest. I had a guy friend in high school who was a projector but I wasn’t aware of his Human Design until recently. Considering the effect his energy had on everyone around him in such a short amount of time (he was a transfer), it makes a lot of sense now.
He was uniquely himself.
At an urban high school, mostly filled with gang bangers, he stuck out.
Although we wore uniforms, his customized jackets, curly Afro and elevated shoe game helped him stick out. He had an aura of independence. The girls adored him, but most were too scared to approach him.
Me? I made friends with him because I loved how he carried himself as if he didn’t need anyone’s validation or attention.
He was the type of guy to ride his skateboard and bike to school — which was uncommon for black kids back in the day unless you were an ‘outcast’ or alternative in some way. Yet he carried himself well with ease, even when he sat at the lunch tables by himself. He might have been a loner, but he was a popular loner little did he know.
Because he made everything look cool and never went out of his way to be different, it created a magnetizing aura around him.
So if you’re a male projector, don’t lose hope.
Focus on naturally attracting the person you want.
Never initiate a relationship without recognition. If you’re invited into someone’s life as a friend, you are a friend. Do not attempt to escalate the relationship if you were not recognized beyond the role you were invited into.
Truth #3 — Dating apps can be tricky, but they’re especially tricky if you’re a projector.
Dating apps are to be treated like other social media sites.
‘Swipe right’ to let someone know you’re interested, but wait for them to message you first. In general, if you match with someone who has yet to send the first message after multiple hours or days, it’s safe to say that the person isn’t fully interested. Projectors are meant to be seen and recognized — so if you’re not getting that vibe from someone, it’s time to cut your losses.
Be mindful of people who are looking for anybody and people who are looking for you.
You also have to watch out for people who solely seek you out for your attention.
A projector’s attention is powerful. You make people feel seen in ways other people don’t. Keep your boundaries strong so that you can identify when someone is only showing up for themselves.
This means that if you match with someone who only speaks about themselves or they try too hard to impress you without actually taking the time to get to know who you are, that person is not for you.
And don’t be afraid to speak up when something doesn’t interest you (IE.: someone asks you out for a drink but you hate going to the bar/clubs).
Projectors should never “go with the flow” in the early stages of dating unless they have received the proper invite. Aside from authority, you’ll know if an invite is correct if it aligns with your desire. Your dating profile should be an authentic representation of who you are.
Once it’s set up, cultivate patience, wait for the messages to come to you.
Use your authority before making the decision to commit to a conversation or date.
Truth #4 — People who don’t recognize you will never see you.
Recognition is a given if you’re in the right environment and around the right people.
If a projector wants to be invited into a connection as a friend, but the other party sees them as a romantic prospect, the friendship will come with lots of resistance and potential humiliation. If the recognition you want doesn’t align with the invitation, it’s not the right situation for you.
If you’re a projector who was invited into a relationship without proper recognition, it may be your instinct to adjust to your partner’s wants and needs, but that is the worst thing you can do for yourself.
You see, once a projector is invited into a relationship with an energy type, it can be hard to leave.
For example, generators and projectors have a symbiotic relationship. Generators naturally appreciate the attention they get from projectors and projectors enjoy the sacral energy of the generators. Together, they have the perfect balance of guidance and execution.
However, because of the undefined sacral in projectors, it’s hard for them to pin point when enough is enough. Projectors can become wrapped up in the attention they receive (for better or worse) and be energetically run over by the person they’re with.
This is why boundaries are important.
Projectors have to be very selective of the company they keep.
Truth #5 — Treat yourself like you’re worthy of a relationship.
It can be frustrating when you express a desire for love only to be bombarded by “you have to love yourself first” sentiments.
But honestly? A projector has to appreciate themselves and the life they live before seeking anything. Show off how great you are and your energy will attract the recognition and invitations you want.
Give the manifesting generators and pure generators something to respond to.
This means looking your best, feeling your best and taking care of yourself.
A projector doesn’t have to do anything for attention except be themselves. In the same breath, when you’re intentional about the energy you put out, people will project it back to you. If the invite doesn’t come, don’t get caught up in bitterness.
There will always be another invite for the projector.
Projectors have to be patient with life. You’re working with efficient energy. Generators respond to prompts throughout the day but it can take a projector weeks, months — even years — for the right invite. Luckily, once the right invite comes, it’ll be perfect timing and worthwhile.
So play (have fun), rest (take breaks, naps) and let your aura do the leg work for you.
You’re not missing out anyone who hasn’t recognized and invited you into love.
What do you think of a human design projector guide filled with practical insights?
Use Projector Insights: How to Live Your Human Design as a resource. This eBook is a digestible reference point for projectors who are new to human design and those who are looking for more practical information.
All work + posts by this account is copyrighted.
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dinrelsanddragons · 3 months
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Vair headcanons from before the blog reformat: sfw edition
Vair was clumsy as a kid and had to put in extra time to work out the kinks. Imagine him tripping over himself while marching and faceplanting in the dirt while the drill sergeant just goes apeshit over this.
Vair: Training is how I relax. Vair: Few things can loose your frustrations as well as a good swing of a blade.
Vair’s favorite tea is peppermint, as it’s his old best friend’s favorite (and it wakes the drinker considerably). But he also likes lemon with honey.
Vair sometimes calls young Zelda (of reginalucem) ‘little miss’ rather than ‘Your Highness,’ generally when no one’s around to eye him for his lack of manners. It’s an affectionate thing. He can’t help but dote on the daughter of his best friend.
While Vair’s weapon of choice is a royal claymore, when marching he prefers to hold his halberd. It’s lighter and less likely to smack someone– an old habit from his younger, clumsy days.
Vair’s hobbies include marching, weapons maintenance, training, and on occasion, archery and falconry. He has a bit of a one-track mind.
Vair fucking hates mathematics. He can do basic things– addition, subtraction, on occasion multiplication with smaller numbers– but anything more than that gives him a headache.
When Vair falls in love, it shows. He practically moons over his crush and has trouble focusing as he can’t stop thinking of them. His otherwise-steady hands shake a little and his heart won’t stop pounding. Also prone to smiling like a dumbass at the thought of whoever it is.
Vair’s weakness, romantically, is comaraderie. He tends to fall for those he works with, and he may or may not have fallen for his boss at one point. He’s also accustomed to these being rather inappropriate feelings, so he tends to bury them under six feet of stone.
Vair has a tendency to collect love letters from around the castle. There are more than a few maids and ladies who find themselves infatuated with this diligent knight, but Vair really has no idea what to do with the tokens of affection he receives. He ends up keeping them in a drawer.
Vair was accused of being a changeling as a kid, before his village was destroyed. He had no idea what it meant, only that people didn’t like him because he was a little odd.
Vair was orphaned at the tender age of six years old, by means of a dragon attack that destroyed his entire village. His parents saw the monster coming, plopped him on a horse, slapped the beast in the rear, and that was the last Vair saw of them. (Sidenote: This was before the character conception of his sister, Cara.)
After his parents died, Vair was raised by a distant relative of his who chose to abandon the family tradition and become a knight. Though the actual relation is rather complex, Vair just calls him his uncle.
Vair was taken to the Spring of Power at the age of five– before his village was destroyed– and Dinraal appeared for him. His parents took this to mean he was blessed by the fire spirit. He certainly is lucky in a few ways; he escaped a massacre…
Vair becomes notably more casual and relaxed at the training grounds. It’s easy for him to forget that not everyone there is a soldier or a knight, and it’s just where he goes to relax (by beating the tar out of some dummies, or other knights.)
Vair is that dad who lets his kid(s) get away with murder. Not literally, though. One might think he’d be a stern father judging from his chilly attitude on the job, but really he’s happy to gush about how sweet his family is at any opportunity.
Vair once tried to date one of his myriad admirers, back when he was a teenager. Never again.
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