#oops im midnight posting!
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jazzzzzzhands · 1 year ago
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I loved my sketches so much, i decided to finish them!
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the-clay-quarters · 7 months ago
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if you're still taking these--🎲 for theodore and grace (or anyone of your choice >:3)
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29. A kiss to the back of the hand. Tfw one of the people in Twitch's circle is? surprisingly polite? and put together? They hang out in pubs with zailor lunatics Where did they find this guy (The sentiment is mutual)
[Ask game]
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a-ko-ge · 1 year ago
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Hands up mr Koski! 🫡
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sargeantsarmy · 1 year ago
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Crying because I saw someone(a h a ckearney shipper) say that Max seems manipulative towards Laura in the prologue and their relationship is toxic, but like, bro Laura getting with the guy that locked her up for two months and can brutally kill her with no hesitation ISN’T toxic????
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lehaneisms · 2 years ago
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IT'S ONLY SEX!
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airenyah · 2 years ago
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on analyzing acting: ohm pawat as an example
attention: read my additions to this post first for some more context as it might help you understand a little better what i'm on about here...
ok so this post was born out of me wanting to give an example of what i mean by "actors perceiving something" bc you can see that really well in bad buddy ep 3 [3/4] in the music shop scene where they're hiding and pat smells pran. however, i realized i actually have a lot more to say on this moment and that i can also use it to try and showcase what i mean with "(having) thoughts"/"creating images" as well as what "directions" are supposed to be (i'm struggling the most with explaining directions in english lmao). i ended up having so much to say that it absolutely is worthy of its own post, so here it is
so this here is the moment in question that i'm going to analyze and i'm going to look at ohm specifically:
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[sorry for the image quality of this gif, i had to compromise it in order to get the file size down]
before i say anything, here's a little disclaimer: obviously i have absolutely no idea what was going on in ohm's head in that moment when he was shooting that take. so whenever i make a mention of a specific sentence that the actor or the character could be thinking it will be my very own interpretation of what i personally am seeing or getting out of it. there are many thoughts and emotions one can read out of an actor's performance (often multiple at once!) and there are many ways of putting all of this into words. i will try to keep everything as technical as possible but sometimes i do need to say what i think is going on in the actor's/character's head in order to explain my point
ok so let's go and break down some of the acting things that ohm is doing here
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[gif 1]
this is a wonderful example of an actor actually and actively perceiving something. at this point pat hasn't actively smelled pran yet, he hasn't reacted to that smell yet. in fact, up until this point pat is more focused on not being caught by chai. what ohm is doing here is showing us the process of going from "don't get caught" to "pran smells good af". and it starts right here. in order to do so, in order for this change of topic to work smoothly pat has to become aware of pran's smell first. and ohm is acting it out for us: he really is perceiving and noticing that smell as the actor and we can see the controls in his brain going "oh my nose is sensing something"
another thing i want to point out here is his "spielrichtung" (god i GOTTA figure out a word for this in english) aka this is where i talk about his "directions" even though it's difficult for me in english bc it sounds rather clunky. (for those who didn't read my original reblog where i talk about acting concepts: the literal translation of this german term is "direction of playing" or "direction of acting". this direction can refer to many things, such as where the focus is directed, or an action, a thought, etc...)
here in this moment ohm's directions are both downwards and very inwards. as in: his focus goes downwards to where the smell is entering his nose while his thoughts are very much directed inwards. this is a private moment for pat and ohm shows us this by acting towards the inside (ohm/pat is completely inside his own head in this moment) ("by acting towards the inside" – sorry, this sounds so clunky in english, i mean to say "indem er nach innen spielt")
alright, moving on. so in real life, once a person has perceived something and the brain has processed and determined it... what happens next? the person is going to react to it and have one or the other thought. in real life we go through a process of perceiving - processing - (re)acting and the same thing should happen in acting:
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[gif 2]
first ohm showed us that pat has perceived something, now ohm shows us that whatever pat has perceived causes some thoughts/feelings inside of pat
(quick side-note on his directions: he's still very much inwards in his direction, the private moment in his head is continuing. and despite his eyes going to the side, the focus of his actions is still directed downwards because again, that's where the smell is)
(edit: i had my mom read this post and on the topic of directions in gif 2 she pointed out that you can actually split it up in three directions even: everything is happening on the inside, then you have the sensory direction that is going downwards because that's where the smell is, while he's sending his thoughts sideways)
i can't read minds, nor can i time travel so i have absolutely no idea what thought was crossing ohm's mind in that exact moment, but it has to be something along the lines of "i gotta smell that again". ohm/pat has perceived the smell, he considers it for a moment and whatever he's thinking here leads to the next moment where pat smells pran on purpose (note: i do love how his head is subconsciously moving slightly down towards the source of the smell again even before he's actively taken the decision to sniff pran):
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[gif 3]
(edit: another thing that my mom said is that in gif 2 it's like his thoughts aren't quite focused yet, they're not quite formed, while in gif 3 his thoughts are very much focused. it's like his thoughts went from a subconscious level in gif 2 to a conscious level in gif 3. anatomically speaking you could even say that in gif 1 and 2 he percieves the smell emotionally and in gif 3 it goes over into a cognitive perception of the smell. because he percieves the smell subconsciously in the beginning and the very first thing that happens when you perceive a smell is that it goes to the emotional center of the brain. then the smell goes on to the cerebral cortex and only then you get the cognitive perception of the smell. ohm's performance here really is FLAWLESS. in the words of my mother, a trained nurse: "he plays that EXTREMELY WELL because you can analyze it anatomically even, and use his performance to showcase how the sense of smell works")
and now we have arrived at the point where pat is sniffing pran. what i really like about this is how subtle ohm portrays this. he doesn't stick his nose into nanon's back and we don't even see him breathe in. and yet we still know that pat is smelling pran here, all bc of ohm's body language where he moves his head down to the source of the smell and the thoughts that ohm is having in his head in that moment. you can just see that ohm is really and actively smelling something here. and by that i mean not only just the motion of him moving his head down, but rather that again he is actively perceiving a smell as his head is filled with thoughts (his thought process goes from something like "what was that smell" to "ok i'm smelling, i'm checking this out")
and now we're back to the point where we were earlier. once again our character is perceiving and processing something, our actor is acting it out for us and so what has to happen next? exactly, a reaction to the new information the character's brain has just processed:
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[gif 4]
and again we can see that ohm's head was filled with actual thoughts in that moment (probably something along the lines of "wow he smells really good" or "oh what a nice smell". and it looks kind of unexpected to me, as if there's also some surprise coming with it along the lines of "oh i wasn't expecting to like his smell so much" or "i didn't think he would smell this nice")
i keep going on and on about thoughts, and it's because that was hammered into me by my fave monologue teacher. he kept going on about "getting your thoughts straight" and "having thoughts" ("die gedanken haben") and whenever we students had no idea what to do with our bodies he'd tell us that if we know exactly what we're thinking in that moment we shouldn't worry about our body because our body will follow our thoughts automatically. we can see that beautifully in gif 2 where an underlying thought (and i don't necessarily mean thought as in an actual thought or sentence inside the mind, but thought kind of in the sense of an emotion or feeling, if that makes sense), anyway in gif 2 there's an underlying thought along the lines of "this smell is good i want to get close to it i want to keep smelling it" and ohm's/pat's head is already moving slightly downwards towards the smell before ohm/pat has taken a conscious decision to take a purposeful sniff. the power of thought y'all. thought is a powerful tool when it comes to acting. and it's really obvious when an actor is in no-thoughts-head-empty mode. unfortunately i don't have an example of a thought-less actor on hand, or i would show you. ok, that's a lie, actually. i do have some examples, but they either don't work as a tumblr post (once again i wish i could do this one acting analysis project i did with my uni friend with online people as well) orrrr i don't want to share them publicly bc i don't wanna hurt anyone's feelings and i want to avoid angry anons in my ask box or getting into arguments with random internet users (i quite like my quiet, peaceful tumblr life where i'm a nobody, thanks)
okay, now back to bad buddy and ohm:
in the other post where i talk about acting i mention that while my monologue teacher would talk a lot about thoughts, my mother instead likes to talk about "creating images". my mom likes to think of it as a flipbook where you have individual pictures that make a moving image when going from one picture to the next at speed. personally i think you can also think of it as individual panels of a comic book that together tell a narrative arch. if we look at the first part from this perspective, as if if were a comic, we can see that ohm provides the audience with these clear images:
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image 1: perceiving a smell, becoming aware of it, noticing it
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image 2: reacting to that first whiff, something along the lines of "is this pran's smell? i gotta smell pran. for science. to see if that nice smell is him"
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image 3: smelling on purpose, there is an aim to the action, it is motivated by thought and by what happened previously
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image 4: another reaction to the perceived smell, this time it's a realization and/or a conclusion (the realization could be something like "oh i like the way pran smells" and the conclusion would be "yes what i sensed earlier was in fact pran's smell")
in full:
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[gif 5]
it has only been three (3!!) seconds (yes i went and checked the duration of that clip on premiere pro) and ohm has already told us an entire story arc. god, i LOVE it when actors do actor things
alright, let's continue with part 2:
so now we get to the part where pran (nanon) comes in with an impatient "what now?" and pat (ohm) reacts
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[gif 6]
since ohm is a good actor he once again presents us with that split second where we can see that he was actively listening to nanon's line, we get to see the moment where pat's brain is processing pran's comment and comes up with a reply. once again ohm is acting this all out for us. this is also what helps make it look like everything is spontaneous: as if the character didn't know pran was gonna say something and what he was gonna say, even though the actor, having memorized the script and likely having discussed it with his co-star and/or the director, definitely knew about it
now let's look at his directions again before we move on to the next gif: he's still in inwards-mode, but pran's line distracts him and snaps him away from the downward focus and now it's going to the side instead, towards nanon/pran
remember what happens after the processing? that's right, a (re)action. pat reacts to pran's comment with the action of saying "you smell good"
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[gif 7]
what i find particularly interesting here are ohm's directions. before i sat down to gif these 10 seconds of scene i distinctively remembered ohm's spielrichtung (fuck it, i'm going with the german word bc "directions of playing" or "direction of acting" just doesn't sound right – quick german grammar lesson: spielrichtung = singular, just one single direction; spielrichtungen = plural, two or more directions) being very much towards the inside. and i had assumed that pran's comment would snap him out of it, that nanon's line would trigger a jump in his spielrichtung. but looking at it now? this... is not quite what i'm seeing. what i'm seeing instead is actually fascinating to me
you see, his actions and his line definitely have an outward focus, to the side where nanon is. however, it looks like that outward focus hasn't quite reached his eyes (it's in the way his eyes travel towards nanon, but they're not really focusing on anything in particular, he looks very distracted instead, as if his mind is somewhere else)
to reiterate: his words are traveling outwards while his eyes look like they're still in inwards-mode. outwards and inwards – two opposing sides. this creates conflict and it's exactly what makes me as a viewer sit up in curiosity and go "huh? what's this? what's going on here?" it fills me with a lot of questions about the character: why can't he snap out of it? did pran's smell really affect him this much? so much that his mind is still on it even when pran starts talking to him? why is it affecting him so much? what's going on inside him? aww does he have feelings? (yes. yes he does 🤭) it's these little subtle things that make me start caring about a character, that make me want to keep watching in order to find answers to my questions. (also! this would be an example of what i meant in the reblog from the other post when i talked about actor's showing conflicts that aren't in the plot/the script)
to be honest, i'd love to double check ohm's spielrichtungen during this line with my mom, but unfortunately it's gonna be another two weeks until i go home for semester break. because this is one of those moments where i realize that i still need to practice my acting analysis skills a lot, because to be quite honest i'm having a moment of is it just me or...? where i'm not entirely sure if i'm seeing this "right" (not that there's much of a right or wrong here...)
alright, moving on... once he finishes talking?
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[gif 8]
right before ohm says his next line he falls back into inwards-mode again and once again we see that there are actual thoughts going through his head. what those thoughts are exactly i can't say, but to me it comes across as if pat is reflecting his statement of "you smell good", it looks like pat is lost in thought about pran smelling good (to be honest? at the end of the day it doesn't actually matter what ohm's exact thought process was, the important thing is that he had one at all, because now i as a viewer get to have fun with interpreting it)
and now we're finally coming to the end of the sequence i've decided to analyze. after a short moment of reflection pat adds "you smell so damn good" and goes to sniff pran one last time
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[gif 9]
and what's ohm's acting choice here? this time he goes for an exaggerated sniff, he points his entire nose at pran and breathes in loudly (which we can't hear in a gif, of course, but we can definitely very clearly hear that sniff in the episode itself). and delights me very much because this sniff right here? in comparison to the ones in the beginning? is very much for show
the first two times pat/ohm smelled pran was very "quiet", rather small and subtle, and very much for himself. it was a private moment. this sniff now? it's loud, it's exaggerated, it's big with ohm bending his entire face down in order to almost shove his nose right into nanon's back. and of course he sniffs extra loudly, to make sure pran can hear it (and yes, i'm specifically referring to the character now, bc ofc nanon should hear the sniff, but more importantly pran should hear it bc pat is about to be a little shit to annoy him)
the reason why this big sniff delights me so much (especially with regard to how the scene continues after the excerpt that i have chosen for this analysis) goes away from the technical aspect of it and is much more about my own interpretation, but i'll tell you anyway: again, in the beginning it was a private moment, pat was smelling pran just for himself. but this causes him to fail to react to what pran just said about chai being gone now and that pat can get up. having that little story arc where pat notices pran's smell and goes to check it out causes pat to linger and that makes pran suspicious. pran more or less catches pat in his own private moment, and so pat turns sniffing pran into a full on show. "you smell good" he says, "do my laundry", he says. pat was nearly caught having feelings for pran (bc we all know this is why he's so affected by the smell) (fun fact: in german we have this idiom that goes "jemanden nicht riechen können" which translates to "not being able to smell someone". it means that you don't like someone and that's why you can't or rather don't want to smell this person. this idiom actually showcases how important the sense of smell is interpersonal relationships) pat was nearly caught and now he deflects. he gets annoying on purpose (by shoving his nose into pran's back and loudly insisting that he likes the smell) to keep pran from asking more questions, he jokingly demands that pran does his laundry bc obviously pat likes the smell of the detergent, it's definitely not the smell of pran that he likes, okay? yes, exactly, pat likes the detergent, not pran, and him sniffing pran definitely had a heterosexual reason and there were definitely no romantic feelings involved. that's the story pat is putting out into the world, that's the show he's pulling off here. ohm goes from quiet and inwards to loud and outwards (spielrichtungen!) and it just delights me because there is so much i can get out of it when it comes to my interpretation
alright, so i've now reached the end of my chosen excerpt and now that we've gone through the entire thing i just want to talk about one last thing: changes.
in the reblog of the other post i mention that when i analyze acting i look out for whether anything changes. (i didn't explicitly say it in that reblog, but it gets boring when an actor keeps doing the same thing over and over again). in the reblog specifically i take emotions as an example, but also make a note that changes can apply to things other than emotions as well. in this scene of bad buddy ohm provides us with a beautiful example of what changes look like when it comes to a specific action
in this 10 second excerpt that i have chosen, pat smells pran 3x in total:
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do you see how each time the action of pat smelling pran is different? each time when pat smells pran it's motivated by a different thought, each time there's a different reason behind it:
the first time is all about pat noticing the smell in the first place, becoming aware of it at all. at this point it's rather accidental: pat never made a decision of "i'm going to smell pran now". no, it just happens. he percieves the smell on an emotional level. sniff one is all about the thought of "oh, i'm sensing a smell".
the second time is where the active decision to smell pran comes in. now he starts perceiving the smell on a cognitive level: this time pat is smelling pran on purpose, it's no longer accidental. pat has a reason to smell pran, he has a goal and it's to investigate that smell that he has just sensed. and as i've already said, he is in his own head and it's a private moment. his thoughts are kinda unfocused and he almost gets a little lost in these thoughts, in the smell. and it's a quiet, subtle action, he only slightly moves his head down to be a little closer to the source and get a better whiff, but that's it, no big loud breathing in, no exaggerated head bending. that sniff right here is for pat. that sniff is between pat and that smell, no one and nothing else. what ohm is doing here is creating a relation between pat and pran's smell
the third time the sniff also comes from an active decision. and again, it has a purpose behind it. this is also what happens in sniff no. 2, so in theory the same thing is happening twice, right? except no, bc the way ohm sniffs nanon for the 3rd time is completely different. while sniff no 2. was quiet and small, now sniff no. 3 is loud and big. it's exaggerated and it's for show. this sniff is no longer only between pat and pran's smell, no, now pran himself is involved too (whether pran likes it or not)
i've said it before and i'll say it again: i LOVE it when actors do actor things
alright, i really am done now. to be honest, i wish i had the time to go to my hometown and go through this whole analysis with my mom first before i post it. despite 3 full years of drama school and 2.5 years of intensely analyzing asian drama with my mom i still don't feel confident in the knowledge i've gained so far and i feel like i need someone with more experience to check my thoughts before i can go publish them for the whole internet to see. but i guess it's time for me to become a big girl that doesn't need to rely on her mommy's opinions. i guess it's because i feel like there is still so much more that i need to learn and there is so much more that i don't notice yet and so i'm afraid that what if what i'm saying is wrong? what if i'm talking bullshit here? but i guess it's time i trust the skills that i have gained so far. besides, when it comes to this there often isn't necessarily a right or wrong but rather a what do you see and how does that make you feel? so i'll go and post this anyway without having anyone look over it, because this is what i see right now at this point in time as i'm writing this. and if at some point in the future i realize i disagree i can always write an update (or another post)
all in all i had fun with this not so little analysis. and i hope you too had fun reading it <3
(edit: as you could already see from the previous edits, well, i actually did have my mom read this whole post at some point after all. she was very impressed and said my analysis is extremely well written. she had almost nothing to add. it's truly about time i start trusting my own skills fklslkkdlsf)
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jakowskis · 8 months ago
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Day 17 - Favorite kiss in the show? What was so special about it? If kisses don’t do it for you, were there any other scenes that stood out as particularly sexy and/or romantic?
ok ok listen… for as horny of a show as torchwood is, i think it does sexy pretty damn poorly. actually it’s the same way it does dark, like they just could Not do adult themes sufficiently lmao - the shit they did intentionally is not satisfactory at all, and they shit they didn’t mean to do is like 10x better. half of torchwood’s best dark moments are in the subtext, and literally all of its ‘sexier’ moments are in the non-explicit scenes. to me, a lot of the ‘sex appeal’ of this show is just the fact that everyone looks hot and everyone’s always eye-fucking each other. the moment people start sucking face i’m less impressed. but tbh i hate how sexuality is done in a lot of media, it’s always gaudy. then again, would it be torchwood if it weren’t excessive and camp? no. so ultimately i’m glad it is the way it is - but i’ll bitch anyway, because i must or i will die. obviously.
all that being said! there’s still some kisses i enjoy. i like most of the gwen and rhys kisses, eve and kai feel super authentic to me and there’s just such an easy chemistry and believability, and that translates to their kisses, too. they feel natural, they don’t go overboard with it, and they look nice. i have a tendency to make a face at kisses in shows dhfkjds and i never did with them. sharp contrast to jack’s kisses which tend to gross me out DFHDJK. yes jack and ianto swapping spit is iconic. no i dont want to see it. anyway i think my fav gwen and rhys kiss is, mm, between their wedding kiss and the one in meat where gwen’s staring at jack HFSDKF
my other fav kiss would probably be mary and tosh in the cafe in gbg, the way tosh smiles into it, it made me blush n go 🥺 in a ‘bi enby that still rmrs being a wlw’ way yknow. it’s just really sweet and lovely. equally sweet is the way diane kisses owen after he gives her the dress, i love that little moment. 
it’s not so much the kisses themselves but my favorite kissing scene is definitely the one in cyberwoman where it cuts between owen kissing gwen and jack kissing ianto. that was just so batshit to see for the first time ill never get over that fhsddfsk. like that was the first time it rlly hit me what i was in for. insane show. insane and iconic bastard show.
also love the moment where john kisses jack at the end of kkbb and it cuts to the whole team watching. oh i love you torchwood’s insane dynamics and their constant voyeurism of each other hrhghg. 
(and then bonus shout out to kisses that aren’t on the mouth, i love how torchwood does more platonic kisses. jack’s various forehead kisses are crucial to me. the sweet chasteness of owen kissing martha on the cheek in aditd. gwen kissing the team goodbye in something borrowed. ohh i love.)
most of those are more romantic… i didn’t find any of the kisses titilating, lol. torchwood’s sexiest moment to me will forever be owen tending to gwen’s wounds in countrycide. i’ll never get over the quiet intimacy of that scene. it’s sexier than everything else combined to me fdhkfj.
yknow what. can i say my fav torchwood kiss was john and burn kissing at dragon con 2013 FHDSJKFHDHFKSDJSK. that did smth for my sexuality ngl like that was like the precise moment i consciously realized i was attracted to burn. NOT IN A FUJOSHI WAY FSHDKJF I JUST. oh dont ask >_> hfdskjf IF U SEE THIS NO U DIDNTTT 🫵🫵🫵
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thecherrygod · 2 years ago
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Robot hdb and mechanic/technician kim pt 2, more serious this time
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@morphlingunderscore thank you for taking interest in this!!! originally i didn't have too many thoughts about it but.... Something shifted, and last night i couldn't stop thinking about it, sorry if it got a bit too long kdkdkgks i got more invested than i thought i would
Maybe he was made by Dora? As part of a prototype series of robots, i think hdb could be harrys model And maybe she even named harry just. Harry. Bc there was something about him, about how programming, that was faulty but made him special (the skills. They make him too human while not human enough) (also maybe part of his program knows he had a name but it got wiped too, and he is fixated on it, on having lost that. .... It could be kept as part of a letter in a compartment somewhere in his robotic body... Maybe even in his chest cavity... Maybe Kim finds it when having to fix something in there........ No concrete thoughts there, just a vague idea that I'm keeping here.)
At first this would be very interesting, getting herself attached to him (and i feel like it's also the thing that makes Kim so invested in him later down the line)
But. Things keep breaking, he has blackouts (maybe caused by overheating? Maybe the skills cause the overheating and/or short-circuiting?), He keeps messing up his tasks, and his system may not be fully capable of following the classic three laws of robotics all the way through. It gets exhausting, she has better projects to work on, others that can stop being prototypes, more worthy of time and resources, that will get recognition, and get her out of the place they're living in.
And so she leaves, and leaves her old lab and obsolete projects to gather dust never to be used again.
Kim, on the other hand, really just is a mechanic for the most part, but he can really work with any machine, and would know about programming and circuits and everything, having learned about this on his free time.
This interest starts properly after having moved from foster families a few times, and managing to get a mechanic to take him and teach him how it all works, getting his hands on an actual engine,tho hes always been interested even as a child, from what he could find in books.
He has his own garage now, and works on any machine you bring him, from cars to a microwave, anything that helps him pay the bills and allows him to work with things he enjoys. Also doing these kind of household appliance fixes makes him go out in search for any parts that he may need for his job, whatever's cheaper (por straight up free, of you know where to go)
I think that, like in canon, it's thanks to Kim that harry wakes up again. In this case maybe hes looking around for something and manages to shock harry in a way that his body starts right there and then? Idk too much about this kinda stuff and it's late. It could also be noise with enough vibration to make Harry's gears shift again. But as i said idk about machines I'm general nor if that makes sense/is possible)
The rest is basically this: harry helps Kim find parts, either that they can use on him or on other machines. He malfunctions more now bc both of the prevailing issues, the wipe out, and the passing of time, and Kim is willing to fix the parts he can, and understand the ones that seem to make no sense, and this, all this, new, can bring a change to Kim's monotonous life, spark something in him, also be confronted about some of his being stagnant by harry. Also the wipeout isn't a complete thing, this guy would realize Kim likes speedfreaks and would use himself as a radio to play it just to see him have a good time, for example. His skills still work with understanding humans (... Sometimes).
another way of doing this tho would be hay being made for the rcm (still Dora's creation imo). Faulty but good for all the same reasons + this robot will give you a ridiculous list of theories/keep track of evidence/of witnesses) alibis/the things that have no relation to the case you don't want him to remember but still does.
In this case one of his faults could also be in fact his memory, and it being faulty enough it had an almost full cleaning could be from people trying to delete info from it and failing. Or him doing it himself so he feels like he still has a reason for not being discarded by the rcm. And kim could still be part of the rcm but both as a mechanic and a detective, or just mechanic, or just detective on paper but with the knowledge
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starry-bi-sky · 11 months ago
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OH ITS THE GUY! THAT GUY! MEME MAN. Okay!! Very informative, thank you! Wow yeah that is. Pretty similar to my thoughts in this characterization of Danny. Although I do lowkey hope that I didn’t make him look that extreme (in that I hope i didn’t make him seem like he’d be the kind of brother who’d trap damian in an illusion of him slaughtering people kinda way) but uh, if I did then - uh.
Whoops.
Not my intent, but I’d hate to make it sound like I’m backtracking if it does look that way. Especially since i meant for this post to be a prompt — i don’t wanna really clarify anything after the initial posting because prompts are all about interpretation unless anyone wants my interpretation of the au.
I just meant to make it appear as though he was (to summarize) harsh on Damian in his training and etc etc — although the whole thing with the assassins in Damian’s room and Danny not correcting Damian on that was intentional on his part. Like yeah, no, Danny definitely traumatized him lowkey intentionally made him think that he’d snuck into his room to attack him.
There are two things that Damian knows that he knows Father doesn’t.
He has an older brother
He was dead
(And a secret third thing: Damian was glad he was dead. They did not get along.)
Well. No, correction, they were two things that Damian knew that Father didn't. Past tense. Strange magic swirled through the air and created a mirage before his eyes, and immediately a scowl forms across his face.
The mirage shifts and shimmers like the light hitting a slowly turning prism, and then it settles into a memory. One that Damian does not recall. Like looking into a tv screen, it shows, faintly, a room, with most of the magic going into the image of a crib.
His mother was standing on one side, and next to her, standing on his tiptoes was a small five year old boy looking up at her. With dark hair and skin that was only few shades lighter brown than Damian's, the little boy's resemblance to Damian was undeniable.
However, his eyes were blue. Not green. Damian's scowl deepens, and he sinks back. "Danyal." He mutters, and feels eyes turn on to him.
Danyal Al Ghul. Damian's older brother. A prodigal swordsman like Damian, and five years his senior. He'd be fifteen if he was still alive. His memory of the last time he saw his brother was still clear in his mind.
(A sword to Danyal's neck. Stars were glittering through his window. Damian was five, Danyal ten. He is not sure why Danyal had snuck into his room, all he remembers is hearing a sound and on instinct reaching for his sword.)
(His brother had intercepted easily. But had not shoved the sword away. Moonlight hit his blue eyes, and Damian remembers seeing the pupils shrink to let the light in. His eyes looked almost silver.)
(His brother bares his teeth at him. Damian wants to slice his neck more than anything, and he bares his teeth back. "Good." Danyal says, his voice low in a hiss, "Your reflexes are good, little brother.")
("Of course they are," Damian remembers snarling, and presses the sword closer. But it does not budge. "I am an Al Ghul.")
(Something unrecognizable passes through his brother's eyes, and his mouth twists into something like a smile. "I know." He says, and tilts his head downwards at him. "And you will be great.")
(His brother shoves the sword back, causing Damian to stumble. And like the wind, he is gone.)
(The next morning, he goes on a mission with mother and a few others. Mother is the only one to return with Danyal's sword, and a red-eyed look in her eyes. Damian does not mourn. Now there's only one of them.)
"Momma." The little Danyal-mirage speaks, a furrow between his childlike brows as mother lowers a bundle into the crib. His blue eyes watch her, and lifts onto his toes to peer into the crib as she sets the baby down. "Who is this?"
Their mother's hand comes to rest along his back. "This is Damian, my son." She murmurs, voice low. "He is your little brother. Protect him well."
Damian scoffs internally -- not likely. He remembers every spar he ever had with Danyal, every harsh word and insult. His pushing, pushing, pushing for Damian to get up. To try again. Do it again. The only kindness he ever showed him was when his fingers bled. And even that was harsh, firm. Rolling gauze around his wrist and scolding him, telling him how to wield his weapon better.
(It was the same as everyone else, but somehow it hurt worse coming from his own brother.)
But he watches his older brother's youngest self tilt his head to the side, and then reach his chubby hand through the crib's bars. He runs small, blunt fingers over the baby's arm, and the baby jerks. Through the crib's bars, Damian sees himself grab Danyal's fingers.
And he scowls even deeper.
And Danyal's eyes... widen. He lets out a little gasp, and a small smile Damian's never seen him wear tilts at the corner of his mouth as he looks up at their mother. "Mother," he whispers, "he grabbed me!"
Damian... his scowl falters, for a moment.
He doesn't wait for a response, he looks back to the baby with sparking eyes. His expression melts like sugar as he bounces the finger being gripped tight by the small hand. "Hello, little brother." His brother says, voice its of usual firmness, but there's more fondness underlying it than Damian's ever heard. "My name is Danyal."
The mirage shifts before Damian can comprehend his older brother's voice. It shows the crib again, appearing as if a few days had passed. There is night lilting through the nearby window, and a creek of the door. The baby doesn't stir.
Danyal sneaks in, still wearing his training clothes and a sword strapped to his side. Damian's scowl returns, watching him creep over to the crib. Of course -- the last night he saw his brother wasn't the only time he'd snuck into his room.
Would he go so low as to attack an infant? Damian wonders, watching his brother cross the room to his crib. But while his fingers rest against the hilt, they never curl to unsheathe.
His brother peers into the crib again, and there it is again, that smile wider in the corner of his mouth. It's not a full one, but its as uninhibited as it gets. Dripping honey-sweet with awe. "You are so tiny." Danyal whispers, and pokes a finger back through the crib. It wriggles, then pokes Damian's cheek gently. "Was I as small as you when mother gave birth to me?"
There is no response from the baby. Not a coherent one anyways, the little thing snuffles and turns his head, mouth open to latch. Danyal stills, his eyes grow ever wider again.
Danyal says nothing else, just rests his cheek against the crib and watches the baby sleep in silence. The affection never leaves his young face.
Damian feels unsettled. Off-foot. This Danyal is foreign to him... He wonders what happened to have changed his brother's mind on him.
There's a scuffle, quiet, but there. Danyal picks up on it just as Damian does, and his head pricks up like a deer, head already turning away from the crib. The affection leaves his face, falling away like water into something serious. His blade is already slightly unsheathed.
Two assassins, belonging to grandfather, burst out of the shadows. Their swords swinging into the air and ready to strike.
Danyal kills them both, his back to the crib. It's not without struggle, and when the two assassins lay dead on the floor, the baby is wailing at the top of his lungs. Danyal has a laceration cleaving down diagonal of his cheek. It's close to his eye, just barely missed blinding him.
Damian never knew how he got that scar. He does now. (He doesn't know how to feel about it.)
His brother clutches his bleeding face, sheathing his sword as tears well up onto his face. But he turns towards the crib, and hurries over. "You're okay, you're okay, you're okay." He hushes rapidly, the League-drilled seriousness fallen away to reveal a panic-stricken five year old. He sticks one hand into the crib, the one not clutching anything, and grabs little Damian's hand.
Their mother comes bursting in that moment, and Danyal turns his head towards her. "Mother." He says, his voice cracks un-wantingly. Their mother steps over the bodies of the assassins easily. "They tried to kill Damian."
"But they did not." Talias says, kneeling down next to the crib to inspect Danyal's face and Damian's well-being. When she finds nothing of concern beyond the injury, she continues. "You killed them before they could, Danyal. Well done."
The mirage of his brother nods, his eyes teary and red.
Damian... is discomfited. he never thought Danyal would kill assassins for him. He would have thought his brother would sooner look the other way. The mirage shifts again, and it quickly shows time passing.
Danyal sits in Damian's nursery every night, after that. He lays at the foot of the crib with his sword, a pillow and a blanket with him. Some nights there is nothing but peace -- or as close to peace as a baby could achieve -- and some days assassins break in.
Danyal kills each one.
The mirage shifts again, and it shows more memories of Danyal interacting with Damian during his youth too young for him to remember. His first steps, his first words.
"Danya." The small toddler of Damian says, arms reaching for Danyal.
A frown curls across Danyal's face, and pulls Damian into his lap. "No, no, little brother." He scolds, voice firm but.. softer. "It is Danyal, Damian. Danyal."
"Danya!"
Damian's brother sighs, but there is that same-small tilt at the corner of his mouth. A glimmer in his eyes. A glimmer... that Damian is finding he recognizes.
(He always thought his brother got that look in his eyes when he was mocking him. Was he wrong?)
The mirage shifts again, and this time it shows only mother and Danyal, alone. Danyal is older, taller. Seven, if Damian had to guess. Mother has a stern look on her face, her hands tight on his shoulders. "Damian will be starting training soon, my son."
Ah, then close to eight then. Training starts, always, at three years old. He watches Danyal nod, his expression mimicking their mother's. His arms are folded, always folded, behind his back, always neat.
"You can no longer have the relationship with your brother as you did before." Mother says.
Danyal's expression... falters. It shifts, it fluctuates. He looks surprised, thrown off. Like he isn't quite sure he heard what mother just said. His brows furrow. "What... do you mean, mother?"
"I mean what I said, Danyal." Mother says, stern, "Ra's will be keeping a closer eye on Damian now that he is of age to begin his training. He will not like if he sees you both getting along."
"I am sorry, my child. But your relationship with Damian ends here. You are rivals now, not brothers." In a cruel form a gentleness, mother raises her hand and tucks a stray curl out of Danyal's face.
Of course. Damian never had a relationship with his brother because of Grandfather. Of course. No, he's not feeling a little bitter. No. There's not an inner child that still, like a candleflame, wishes that he'd had a bond with his only flesh and blood.
Danyal is dead now. So it's not like it matters. He's happy about this.
Danyal frowns, and he steps back. He looks lost in thought. "We are still brothers, mother," he says, argues, and looks up to meet mother's eyes. "Let me train him, I will make sure he gets the skill he needs. If we must be rivals, then I will teach him how to defeat me. If he can defeat me, he can defeat anybody."
Their mother, and Damian, both blink in unison. Then mother smiles something sharp, calculated. She folds her hands behind her back. "Then do it. But you will make him hate you."
"...So be it."
Damian.... Damian is silent. His world axis has been tilted on its head. He is sliding, and sliding, and sliding down. Spinning. Many things click into place at once.
More memories from the mirage show. It shows Danyal training Damian. It shows their arguing, their bickering. It shows Danyal going to their mother to praise Damian and his skills, how fast he is picking up on the sword. How one day he will surpass even him.
It shows Danyal sitting outside Damian's bedroom door every night, listening in for anyone who dares to break in. His knees drawn to his chest, his sword at his side. Sometimes he sneaks in, sword drawn, when he hears a sound.
Some nights, Damian wakes up. He remembers those nights. Danyal standing over his bed with his sword unsheathed and tight at his side. He remembers the instant terror as he immediately reached for his own weapon.
His brother always scolded him for his lack of vigilance. That had he been anyone else, Damian would have had his neck cut. He would've been dead already. It only made Damian's hatred of him grow.
But he understands now. Because there were assassins in the room that Damian, four years old, three, did not notice. Not until later. He always assumed the attacks on him after Danyal's death had been because now there was a new heir to target.
It had been the only lesson he'd been even somewhat grateful for.
Then finally the mirage shimmers, and it shows Danyal, ten years old, in one of the training rooms, mid-spar with Mother. It's fast, sharp, impressive and like a blur. Damian is unsure if at ten which one of them was the better swordsman. Some of the assassins who have never met Danyal said Damian was, but the ones who had said it was Danyal. He'll never know.
In a lull in the fight, when their swords are crossed, mother speaks. "Ra's wants you and Damian to fight." She says, teeth grit into a deep scowl. The cross breaks and Danyal jumps back, he frowns.
"We have fought, mother." He says, and dives in first, swinging for mother's feet. Mother dodges, and slices at his arm. He swerves out of the way, twisting on his feet like a dance. "We are always fighting, doesn't he see our spars?"
"Not a spar like that, my son." Mother says, a snarl in her voice. She lunges, and Danyal blocks her blade. "A fight to the death. Father has grown tired of having two heirs."
That gets Danyal's attention -- or, more accurately, it distracts it. His eyes widen, and his sword lowers for a single moment. A mistake. "What?" Is all he gets out before mother has him on his back, her blade pressed to his throat.
He freezes. As does Damian. Danyal's brows furrow, then unfurrow, only to knot up again. "Mother, what do you mean a fight to the death?" He flips to his feet when mother removes the sword. She walks over to grab her water.
"Must I repeat myself, Danyal?" Mother snaps, rubbing her forehead before swigging from her canteen. "Father wants to find out which one of you is the stronger heir, and so you will fight to the death after your training in a few days."
Danyal's tan face loses a shade of color, he looks ashy. "There must be some mistake!" He exclaims, his arms gesturing out as he peers around mother. "There is a five year disparity between us, Damian has only just started training two years ago. It would be an unfair fight!"
"Do you think me unaware?" Mother whirls on him, and there is a grief-stricken look on her face. Like she is already mourning Damian's death. Damian feels ill. "Your skill is far beyond what Damian can accomplish right now, and there is nothing that I say that can convince Father otherwise."
Danyal wears an expression like he is scrambling for answers. A white knuckle grip on his weapon. There is a long silence, and his lower lip curls up. His throat bobs, he swallows. "Is there really nothing we can do?"
Mother makes a frustrated sound, pushing her loose hairs out of her face. "Not unless Father changes his mind, or I send one of you away. But Father would surely send someone to look for you or Damian."
"What if one of us faked our death?"
Mother stills. As does Damian. No, he thinks, stiff as a rod, no way. These mirages were lying, nothing but figments of an imagination. Of some quiet what-if that Damian had not yet stomped out.
Mother's expression shifts, and then turns contemplative. Danyal notices, and keeps pushing, he looks as hopeful as he could get beyond his usual unwavering, stone-like expression. "One of us could go to father--"
"No." Mother cuts off, voice sharp. Danyal wilts, confusion flittering across his face. Damian, from the corner of his eye, sees Father tense as stone. His white-slit eyes have not left the mirage. Nobody's has.
"Father will undoubtedly check there first, it would not be a good idea. You or Damian will have to go somewhere where he would not think to look. Someone unaffiliated with the League."
Danyal's face falls, shutters, and then closes up again into stone. Mother begins to pace, and Danyal's blue eyes follow her. "So a stranger?" He asks, and there is disgust lilting into his voice.
Mother nods, and she looks just as offput as Danyal.
The mirage of Damian's brother rolls his shoulders back. "Then I will do it, mother." He says, voice unwavering. There is a stubborn note behind it all, one that Damian recognizes. "I will fake my death, and Damian will stay here."
Mother's eyes turn sharp on him, and she stops in her spot. She pivots. "Are you sure?" She asks, eyebrow raising, "There is a chance you will never meet your Father if you leave. Nor will you see I or Damian again, if you do this."
Something like fear flickers across Danyal's face, eyes widening momentarily -- as if that very thought had not crossed his mind. But then it smooths over to sharp determination. He nods. "It would be the same for Damian if it was him instead. I will do it, Mother."
Damian feels ill again. Father has a strong set in his jaw, his teeth grinding.
Mother stares at Danyal, and then her expression softens. And like before, it is grieving. "In a few days time, I and another member of the League will be going on a mission to the American States. I will tell Father that you will accompany me, once there we will dispose of the other member and then orchestrate your death."
The American States. Danyal was here, in the country. He was out there somewhere -- but no this was fake. It had to be. Danyal was dead. A fool who got himself killed on a mission with mother and left the title of Heir to Damian.
Or maybe it had been his plan all along. His and mother's both.
...Was mother ever going to tell him?
The mirage of Danyal nods, sharp. Understanding. There is a gleam in his eyes that is not pride, it is tears. And when Mother leaves the room and leaves him alone, the stone-like expression on his face crumbles and falls.
His brother, ten years old, curls up his lip in an ugly way. It wobbles as the tears in his eyes do, and he brings up his hand to slam it over his mouth. And sinks to his knees, a yell-like sob muffled behind the skin.
His brother, ten years old, looks smaller than Damian remembers him being, and cries.
Damian has never seen Danyal cry. Not once in the mirage of memories, nor in his own.
The memory holds for a minute, and then disappears. And no new one shows up. The magic is gone, and it leaves a silence in its wake. Heavy, staticky, and full of revelations.
So there are two things that Damian knows that his Father now knows too.
He has an older brother
His older brother is alive.
(And a new secret third thing: Damian wasn't sure how to feel about it.)
#i love word vomits! i do it all the time just look at this post and my posts about crime alley kid danny#and my post about the missed potential of danyal al ghul#i’ll be lowkey mortified if i made it look like danny is a brocon because oops!!! that wasnt my intention! sorry!!#but im 99% sure you more meant that danny was encouraging damian to hate him in training as the itachi-ness#not the brocon ness.#but also im lowkey chuffed that you mentioned the whole ‘danny is encouraging damian to hate him’ thing#mostly bc i love when people notice things in my writing. i puff up like a bird#damian’s opinion on danny gets all over the place in this prompt and thats my faulu#fault for writing this at midnight last night but i hope that in the end it comes off as#‘i hate him but now i’ve learned new things about him that explain things and now i’m kinda conflicted’#it doesnt take away the fact that yk. danny traumatized him but there’s potential for improvement there#a glimmer of ‘hey maybe something can be salvaged here?’#danny’s whole thing with damian comes from a place of concern over his wellbeing and safety but yk.#considering this is the LOA we’re talking about. of course it doesn’t come out that way and its intentional on danny’s part too#my interpretation would be that if danny hadn’t been told he couldn’t be seen as close to damian he would’ve been nicer to him#still pr stern about his training but he’d be as lenient as a fellow child could be#damian wouldn’t’ve have thought he’d want to kill him thats for sure#but that’s a what if and me babbling sO#thank you for the explanation! i did indeed ask for it so thank you for the word vomit
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adoresia · 1 year ago
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✦˚₊ TRUST ME I GOT NOTHING FOR YOU OTHER THAN LOVE…
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Pairing : E42 Miles Morales x Fem!Reader
Synopsis : Miles finds it hard to open up to you about whats going on in his life, after a little persuading he finally tells you about whats bothering him so much.
Sierra speaks : FIRST OF ALL… thank you guys so much for all the love on my last fic it means so much to me🫶🏾🥹 it took so long for me to build up the courage to start posting… Here is another fic i had in my notes to make you guys happy! I litterally have a bunch of fics and fic ideas stored for myself and now..im sharing them with you!🥳 enjoy!! also this is a little longer than i had planned…
Warnings ❕: Miles almost crying 🥹, rubbish spanish, heavly suggestive (oops), kissing, cussing, teasing???.
Listen too’s :
YALL BETTER LISTEN TO THE SONGS I PAIR WITH THESE FICS ISTG.
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You leaned on the railing on your balcony, eyes fixated on Miles’s tall figure walking back and forth outside your apartment complex.
It was well pass midnight and the street lights were the only thing illuminating the darkness of your Brooklyn neighbourhood.
He was by himself smoking a blunt. He knew you hated when he smoked so he attempted to keep it from you, however this time he couldn’t really hold himself back.
Life was dragging him through the dirt right now, with the passing of his father and the pressure of being prowler on his back, you could almost mistake Miles for being mute. A part of his life had been ripped away.
And you couldn’t blame him.
It was a struggle for him to open up to you, and despite being together for almost a year, he still struggled to talk to you, to fully open up to you. And even though you welcomed him into your life with open arms, he still did not feel complete. Nothing could replace what he had lost.
Before Miles had found himself outside the both of you were cuddling. With Miles laid between both of your legs, his head rested on your chest while you massaged his scalp with your nails.
Since his arrival he had not uttered a word to you apart from :
“hey baby, ima just stay here from a bit if thats okay.”
He hugged you tight, even tighter than ever before. You could tell something was up, but you let him go at his own pace, weather he wanted to tell you about it or not he knew you would always be there for him.
So here you both lay in silence on your bed, your sheets draped over the both of you. It was like that for an hour. Miles fiddling with the hem of your bra staring at your desk chair.
He blinked like 20 times in the last hour, you could tell he was lost in his thoughts. He looked so over it, and it pained you that there was nothing you could do to help him liven up a little. You kept assuring yourself that it would be temporary. Seeing Miles sad made you sad.
But as the minuted went by Miles stay lost in his sunken thoughts. You couldn’t bare watch him in this state for any longer, even if it meant you had to push him a little.
“What’s wrong hermoso? i’ve never seen you so…down.”
“Nada, Mami. just... thinking.”
“About what papa? sabes que puedes decirme cualquier cosa.”
Miles responded with a hum, not bothering to open his mouth again as it was smushed against your cleavage. The familiar sound of silence re-entered the room, theres nothing else you could say.
“Ima go outside for a bit baby, ill be back.”
He lifted himself off of you so suddenly, sliding on his shoes and giving you a peck on the top of your head without even giving you time to process.
“Where are you going? do you want me to come with-“
“No. I’ll only be a few seconds chiquita.”
“but.”
There were no ‘buts’ he had already shut your door before you could bombard him with questions. Instead your mind filled with them.
Did you push him away? Did you ask too much? say, too much?
Thats how you found yourself staring down at him in the middle of the night, worried. His puffer jacket stay thrown on your desk chair, he had not even thought about bringing it with him, knowing it was quite cold outside. Was he really that desperate to leave? to leave you?
You took a deep breath and decided it was about time you went down for him. You picked up your hoodie, or rather his hoodie; one you stole from him when you went over to his place, sliding into it like a huge blanket.
You put on your slides and grabbed his puffer jacket. Leaving your phone behind.
Pressing on the exit button of your apartment complex you stepped outside. Making sure to put a block on the door so it wouldn’t close, trapping you outside.
You walked towards him almost tip toeing so he couldn’t hear you. You came to a stop behind him watching the smoke blow away with the wind while he brought his arm down beside him, blunt in hand.
“I know your there ma.”
“…”
he laughed looking over his shoulder, you smiled handing him his puffer.
“Its so cold out here even this hoodie isn’t doing me justice, put your jacket on Milo.”
He took his jacket from your hands holding it to his side, seemingly unfazed by your words and the cold.
“Not as an accessory, miles. Put it on. Please.”
“You’re shivering ma, you look like you need it more than i do.”
And instead he places each of the arm holes over your shoulder. You gave up, there was no point in convincing him, and anyways you were still cold even with his giant hoodie on. Goosebumps laddered on your thighs because of your extra short- shorts.
“Hand me the blunt at least. You know i don’t like when you smoke.”
You held your hand out so he could replace the cold air blowing over your palm with the wrapped blunt.
“Yeah im sorry. I’ll try to stop.”
“Sorry doesn’t mean anything if your not gonna change.”
“I know ma. I promise I’ll try.”
“Good.” You stood in-front of him, squinting your eyes.
“Where yo glasses?”
“Inside.”
“Why didn’t you bring them?”
“Because i wasn’t thinking about that at the time. Which actually beings me to why i’m here. I’m worried about you, Miles. You won’t talk to me and if you let these feelings bottle up inside you it won’t…end well.”
“What your gonna break up with me if i dont talk?”
“No… i meant-“
“Then i don’t need to talk. As long as i have you with me theres no need to worry.”
Silence filled the atmosphere between you two again. Miles could sense your disappointment. He let a moment go by watching you huff as you gave up trying to figure out whats wrong with him. You started to make your way back to your apartment before he stopped you with his words.
“Its Ma.”
You spun yourself around to face his back.
“mhmmm.” you signalled for him to continue, walking towards him.
“I aint never seen her this down since dad passed. Her job is taking every single ounce of energy and happiness out of her, she leaves at like 6 in the morning to come home at God knows what time during the night and falls asleep on the couch. She doesn’t have time to even get anything to eat before she has to get up again the next morning to go to work. I can count on my fingers the amount of words she’s said to me this whole week. And last night…”
He came to an abrupt stop, bringing his pointer finger and thumb up to the inner part of his eyes trying to stop himself from crying in front of you.
He let his bottom lip fall letting out a sigh.
“Its okay Milo, you don’t have to finish the rest if you don’t want to. It’s just you and me bonito you can cry, déjalo salir.”
Still with your reassurance he refused to let you see him in this state, but was unable to control the single tear that threatened to drop.
You wiped both his eyes with the pads of your thumb until there was no tears left on his face or his waterline.
“Milo, you don’t have to act all big nd tuff around me. Everyone cries yknow?” you looked up at him while wrapping your arms around him.
“You are so good to me mi amor, ion deserve you.”
“Corny. But i know.” you smiled closing your eyes in his embrace.
he laughed breathily before giving you a kiss to your forehead.
He held your hand turning his head signaling for you both to go back inside.
“It’s low-key getting a bit cold now. I think the only thing keeping me warm was that weed.”
He looked at the now smushed up ball what remained from his blunt. Before eyeing you up and down.
“Cmon lets go, not even these two layers are keeping me warm.”
You pulled on his arm directing him back inside the apartment complex.
Once you got to your door you scrambled everywhere for your keys. Your short pockets, Jacket pockets, hoodie pockets, shit you even checked your afro. Before you thought back to when you grabbed Miles’s jacket and left the room while your keys sat still on your desk.
“Fuck. were locked out.”
“You for real?”
“Nah im just pretending i left the keys inside so we can stay out here in the cold.” you rolled your eyes, thinking maybe that wouldn’t he a bad idea as long as you were with Miles.
He leaned against the wall next to your apartment door pulling you in for a hug. You wrapped your arms around his torso and laid your head on his chest, the beat of his heart ringing in your ears.
His lips hovered over your head before placing gentle kisses on your scalp.
“How many kisses are you gonna give me Milo.”
“You want me to stop?”
“No..” You smiled to yourself.
“Then stop complaining.”
Lifting his hand from your waist Miles cupped your chin lifting it up so that your eyes would lay on his. His pupil fell to your lips and then back to your eyes. You knew what was up.
“No.”
“Fuck you mean ‘No’.”
Miles mimicked you while you laughed at him, he looked at you unamused.
“Im joking Milo, kiss me.”
“No.”
“FUCK YOU MEAN NO?”
Now it was Miles’s turn to laugh, although you didn’t find it funny a smile still crept up on your face as you narrowed your eyes at him and pondered.
His laugh reminded you of him 2 years ago, when he had a softer personality, happily striding to you or anyone around him with a proud smile on his face, you missed it. And you know he did too.
You stood up still leaning on him but on the tip of your toes. You wrapped your hand around his nape and pulled him in for a well anticipated kiss.
Your lips locked with his, coming together like a jigsaw puzzle. For a moment you envisioned kissing Miles for the first time a year ago, how he didn’t see you coming when you pecked him on the lips. And how he pulled you back kissing you desperately with deep desire.
You lifted up your other arm and wrapped it around his neck while you played with the tip of his braids. Miles wondered his hands down from underneath your shirt to just under your ass. His fingers pushed gently against your skin shooting tingles throughout your body.
At this point your knees were getting weak as your head swayed against his, your mind went into a haze as the heat from the kiss sent you into a bliss. You felt Miles tug on your bottom lip granting himself access to your mouth.
Both your heads sped up the pace bobbing over eachother in sync, Miles feeling insatiable lifted you up to sit on his hips as he turned you both around. You now leaned back on the wall while he rubbed the bottom of your thighs still insatiably kissing you.
Your eyebrows furrowed with pleasure until he pulled away, you both stared into eachothers narrowed eyes breathing heavily.
“Fuck if we were inside right now, the things i’d do to you mami.”
“Break down the door if your that desperate.”
His head fell into your chest as he chuckled. You laid your head on top of his for a while before he let you down.
You both sat outside your apartment door, you on top of miles in a fetal position. Your coat draped over the two of you (barley) as he stroked your forehead with his thumb.
“Te quiero mucho ma, hasta la luna y de regreso.”
He whispered before placing another kiss on your forehead.
“hmm? whatchu say Milo?”
“Nada mami, cierra tus ojos.”
Extrs :
— Yeah your keys were inside, but so were your parents😭 so when your mom opened the door that morning to head of to work the both of you lay there snoring, with your arms wrapped around eachother.
— When you took Miles’s blunt you tried a little yourself 🤫
“Ma.. what are you-”
*heavy coughing*
“so im not allowed but you are-?”
“sh. i was just seeing what the hype was all about *cough* I-I feel like im dying”
Miles just laughs at you.
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remyfire · 7 months ago
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remy help, im writing my first mash fic and idk anyone who watches the show so idk who else to ask. do u know how the hell post op shifts work?? like is there a surgeon in there all the time? how long are shifts/how often do they trade off? i figure if anyone would know, itd be you (ps i love ur work and thank u <3)
This is so sweet omg and I'm excited to read your fic!! If you're comfortable when it's done, lemme know that it's posted so I can come read it :D
Honestly I do a lot of my own writing about it based on context clues rather than any firm, clear knowledge!! In my fics, I usually make the shifts around like 8 hours long, one surgeon on the midnight post-op shift because it's usually quieter, one relieves them in the morning, one relieves them in the afternoon, etc. After big pushes, I usually put two in there at a time because there's so much to monitor, but also that's what their very well-trained nurses are for. We know that there are two surgical shifts—they'll say over the loudspeaker for both surgical shifts to report to the helipad when there's a push—and also that there is a surgeon 'on call,' so I'm not sure if the surgical shift relates to post-op, relates to a surgeon being on call for those 12 hours to come scrub up if they get like just three or four casualties who come in, or what. I play pretty fast and loose with it and also smudge the edges of the scene rather than getting very specific with the details fhkdfsd
We see several scenes where during mealtimes, all of the surgeons are eating together, so I often assume that if it's slow during mealtime, they can go grab a bite as long as they're listening to be called back in if there's an emergency. But we also know that in Merchant of Korea, Charles asks BJ to close his last patient for him so Charles can go get a bite to eat before his post-op shift, which BJ points out isn't protocol, so I might be wrong about mealtimes. They get at least one day completely off medical duties because I vaguely remember someone complaining once that they had to go do something I think in post-op or surgery on their day off.
But yeah, for simplicity's sake (and often the convenience of having the Swamp occupied only by two of them oop), I usually have one in there at all times except for meals, and if there's two—say, after a really big push—then usually I have one focusing on paperwork while the other is more actively rotating among the beds. But they have so many really amazing nurses that monitor the patients much closer and just generally keep the doctors updated, then take orders based on that, so I feel like they pull a lot of weight when a doctor needs to step out for one reason or another too.
This has probably not been helpful at all. Anyone with more concrete information is welcome to weigh in because it's probably better assistance than my "I go by vibes based on what best assists my plot at the time."
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good-beans · 11 months ago
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HI reusing this post but I'm going to hop on in like 20 minutes if anyone wants to come draw with us :3
Interest check/scheduling poll :)
Earlier I mentioned that I wanted to get braver and start chatting more with the online pals. It's become an official new year's resolution, so here we go: I'm going to set up a little discord server where we can chill and do art together!! You don't have to do art, but it'll be open for everyone to stream their screen so it'll feel like An Event rather than just an awkward phone call, haha. You don't even have to talk, you can just vibe. I'm not quite confident enough to do games yet, but I want to work my way to that 👍
If this was something others were interested in, I was wondering what times work for people. I'm making it a poll for ease, but feel free to reply if there's more detail. My schedule's pretty free so I can work with you guys. I'll try out a few different times as we go! I'm setting the poll for a week but I'll probably reach a conclusion in just a few days.
Time converter because I'm in EST lol
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evelili · 1 year ago
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I just finished your Magnum Opus, and it was super great. I especially loved the Pinkie chapter (which surprised me because she’s my least favorite character!). Anyway, do you have any mlp fic recommendations?
oh boy do i have a list for you, strap in!
if you read my magnum opus writeup, you may have seen i mentioned three authors that dragged me back into mlp. if you're interested in sciset (and what's probably the most popular eqg fic on the entire site), Long Road to Friendship by Albi is a longfic that started after the first eqg movie and is a rlly lighthearted read. i don't normally care for OCs but gosh if i dont accept Albi's version of trixie's parents as canon in my heart haha. if you're interested in pony adventure fic, i also rlly liked Sunset of Time, another rlly well done longfic ive carried in my brain since i first read it xd
the second author, Monochromatic, aka the raritwi authority aka someone who has a GREAT taste in editors, has written three of the most formative longfic ive ever read: The Enchanted Library, its sequel The Enchanted Kingdom, and Crimson Lips which i unfortunately can no longer link since she's taken it down, but i believe you can still buy physically through PFP if you wanted to take a gamble on it (it would be a very good gamble). apart from her longfic though i also adore some of her shorter works, including but not limited to The Choices We Make, a really interesting Pinkie study that's definitely shaped how i view her, Your Own Worst Enemy, which is just. peak rarity content, and Injuring Eternity, which while being one of her older works still has certain passages that wreck me emotionally on sight.
and the third author responsible for my magnum opus is the one and only Aragon, who i can not only recommend for his fics but ALSO for his blog posts and comics (see the comic index on his profile for links to all of them, as well as this amazing blogpost about his neighbour that is just peak comedy). he's also the writer responsible for the banger longfic Crime and Funishment which absolutely defined my writing aspirations for a few years and is the definition of comedy if you looked it up in my heart, as well as In Hindsight, yet another banger rarity fic, and Love Is In Doom which is just bloody, silly, stupid fun (and has sunset shimmer in it)
and then if we want to talk fics i love written by other authors, Sleepless Knights by r5h has my favourite brand of scitwi written right into the margins, Administrative Angel by horizon has one of the most amazing endings to an opening chapter ive ever read AND an amazing celestia, The Best Night Ever by Capn_Chryssalid is a fandom classic with a groundhog day twist on the gala episode from s1, Side by Side by Krickis is a feel-good rarijack oneshot w a focus on lgbt (specifically trans) themes, Wax Earplugs by Reedhoarse has a dysfunctional mess of an adagio dazzle that i adore, Merge Request by FanOfMostEverything has all the scitwi/midnight shenanigans you could ask for wrapped up in the relatable content of github hell, Guppy Love by PaulAsaran is a rarijack longfic with an incredibly realistic setting and an interpretation of mermaids that i love so much, Doused Flame by heartlessons has me handshaking on the "sopping wet pathetic relatable guy" flash sentry interpretation that won me over recently, 80 Days 'Til the World's Farthest Shore by Cynewulf feels like reading a professionally published short story (and i mean that in the best of ways, it's enthralling), and finally if you'll allow me to be self-centred a bit i also am very proud of my two oneshots Heartstrings and Something About Midnights if you wanted to check em out too xd
oops long post!! im not sorry for it, i hope you can find something in here that catches your fancy (or even all of it haha), there's soooo many incredible fics in the fandom it floors me every day that i can read all these incredible works for free!!!
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mossycoffee · 6 months ago
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•┈••✦ ❤ ✦••┈•
July 9th
Its currently midnight for me so, good evening.
I decided that I missed my red hair too much to live on. I had red hair for a couple of months but I was getting annoyed on the upkeep. So I dyed it back to dark brown. So last night I impulsively made up my mind and I went and bought color remover, cause my hair was already fried from bleach, I got two things of hair dye. I got a dark red and a kinda lighter red so i could mix them and stuff. The color remover actually worked amazing! but when i washed out my hair i noticed a couple spots that I wanted to fix before applying the red, but i was 11pm on a Monday so of course nothing was open. I ended up going to a 24-hour CVS and all they really had was "color oops" so i got it and then when my friend and I got home we started applying it. I wish I could explain the smell that it had. Literally rotten eggs. So while i was applying it my friend looked up why & she said that 80% of the posts were people asking why they couldn't get the smell out of their hair. The moment she read that i stopped and i washed that shit out. But i guess it was too late for me because the smell was there, no matter how many time i washed it, no matter how many products i put in my hair. The smell was still there. So the next morning, I went and got another box of color remover and smacked that shit on there and it got rid of the smell thank god, and i got my hair to a decent base color. My hair is now BRIGHT red which i kinda wanted a darker red, but i also dont hate it. Im not sure if im going to dye it again and try and get it darker or if i should just vibe with what i have for a while.
Im finally getting back into playing video games too :D its been so long. Me and my BF bought the new xbox and he pays for game pass so i mass downloaded a bunch of stuff, and I've been playing more games on my PC too.
I feel like my brain is so foggy and literally nothing is actually there so i dont really have anything to post right now but thinsg could change lol.
I hope everyone has an amazing day i love you all <3
•┈••✦ ❤ ✦••┈•
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i got a tad too silly a wrote treebark at midnight oops
i’ve shared some with my friend and now i wanna post it here teehee
(also i originally mistook lutes to look like flutes so there’s a tiny chance you might see lute in here 😭)
Martyn thumbed the instrument that faintly stuck out of his armour. The pad of his finger met a cool, flaky surface while he firmly pressed against each key that he could reach. Nimble fingers wrapped around the rod, only squeezing.
It was bestowed to Martyn from Ren; simply on a lazy afternoon warmed by fireflies. The two cleared chests from the past in search of resources. As Martyn tidied his own area, separating his junk from a few emeralds, he had turned to see Ren’s hands cupping something.
Somethin’ from me mother,” he recalled before Martyn could ask, cornflowers eyes still settled on it. Despite his sharp nails, the man almost cradled it to his chest.
“A trinket, I suppose. She always urged me to do anything but read all day.” A soft chuckle. “She despised the tragedies I read. Too solemn for her liking.”
Martyn studied it from where he stood. “A bit old, don’t you think, my liege? What do you suppose we do with it?”
Ren hummed. He then held it out of towards the other. “You should keep it.”
Martyn blinked. As sharp his brain was moving, his syrup filled mouth couldn’t seem to follow.
Ren still held out the flute.
“Er…” Words. “Are you sure, my king? You’ve had it for years, a-and you probably want to hand it to someone else. I’m sure BigB would appreciate it.”
“I’m quite positive in this decision,” Ren confirmed. “What’s a better idea than to give it to someone trustworthy.”
“But—“
“Please,” Ren said, a twinge less soft and more…Martyn couldn’t put a word on it. Demanding? Pleading?
“You swore an oath to protect my life. The least I can do is show me gratitude to me favorite hand.”
Martyn’s hand reached for the instrument. “What other hand do you have, my liege?” he quipped. 
Ren hummed once more. “Exactly. You’re me first and only.”
Martyn took the flute.
Though the metal tinted brown with age and a few notes wheezed as they were played, Martyn promised his king that he’d make good use of it. 
Every now and then (which was more often than he’d admit aloud) he would feel a part of it. It grown to become a way to ground himself, he guessed. A reminder of who he was really with.
im boutta write a flower husbands cameo chat 🤞 and my writing mix is pretty neat today so i’m locked and loaded
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chirpychippie · 4 months ago
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oops i just realised your name won't be censored in this, i'm sorry about that
also sorry incase of some other stuff-
it's midnight for me so technically sept 9th and i'm gonna show and hope it's taken well
i think i drew it one of the day(s) when i colored the blue haired me's ><
also
i've been so worried all day and night
one thing i'm worried about:
what if you were around and noticed i deleted a long comment on your side on insta? well- it wasn't a bad ramble, i did delete it though because i also worry about my associations lke c0ugh sundays cOugh bothering you-? i know i'm easily impressionable(?) or attached in certain ways and i do worry about stressing you those ways ;-;-;-;-;" also around the time i said that i got 2-3 angsty sounding notifs that i was like 'o shit is this a spiritual sign right now or??? ;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;' i would further elaborate on that if you wanted)
anyways i have screenshots of my rambly deleted post if interested
it mentions embarassing myself, outside of us, here on tumblr so i feel too EEK to show it here for now
i got back to thinking i should wait for you to approach so that's what i've been trying to do and then today happens and i've been losing it and i am sorry if you or others are upset in relation to us or not, whatever potential reasons, i'm sorry for stressful stuff
i'm so close to asking if you're around and stuff im
but
i don't wanna mess up
what if you aren't and etc etc, worriesssss
.
.
mon, sept, 9-9-24
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