#oops actual syscourse

[raccoon-queer]

misinformation about DID/OSDD within the DID/OSDD community

no, I am not a psychologist. however, these things are untrue and they need to be acknowledged. this post is anti-endo. endos can reblog, but do not clown

"OSDD-1 can be polyfragmented"

I debunked this here, but in short: polyfragmented DID is a result of very severe trauma, and if your trauma was so severe that you developed pf-DID then you are going to have amnesia of some kind

"OSDD-1b means you have little amnesia"

I also debunked this one in an earlier post. the DSM-V OSDD-1b criteria* explicitly states that there is no dissociative amnesia whatsoever. if you have amnesia, then you do not have OSDD-1b

*specifically, the part of the DSM-V OSDD-1 criteria that is referred to as OSDD-1b within the community

the entire concept of emotional amnesia

emotional amnesia is simply dissociation from your emotions, which can occur in all kinds of disorders with dissociative aspects. there's nothing inherently wrong with the term emotional amnesia, but some people seem to be misunderstanding it. if your "emotional amnesia" involves losing memories, losing time, or extreme blurriness/distortion of memories, then that's probably not just emotional amnesia

[planetarymetals]

okay, this may be the only syscourse post i ever actually make, but i have a genuine question that i would like an answer for.

for context, i don't consider myself (nor our collective) to be entirely "pro" or "anti" endo; we just don't see the point in wasting time we could be using to work on ourselves policing another person's existence. we don't care if endos interact with us and we will still treat them with respect.

with that being said, i'm more than willing to listen to both sides here!

what is the big deal if endogenic systems "appropriate" our terminology, apps (i.e. simplyplural, pluralkit), etc.? why is it bad?

correction: oops! both of my examples are, in fact, pro endo,, that's on me! just apply that hypothetical to some other resource along the same lines. same gist. i do understand why people wouldn't want endogenic systems in spaces intended only for traumagenic systems, as we exist in two fundamentally different contexts and traumagenic-only spaces are likely to be discussing trauma related issues. that's perfectly reasonable and i agree we should each have our own spaces to ourselves within the plural community!

however, i argue that, by allowing others to use our (traumagenic) tools, we are destigmatizing our existence as trauma survivors and thus not immediately putting ourselves into danger by using those sorts of things publicly.

thanks in advance for any explanations! <3

[a-dragons-journal]

We're finally deciding to make a post about this.

So, some of you may recall a while back that I wrote a whole post about me calling myself "singlet+," with experiences very close to plurality, but nonetheless not quite plural. I've gone back and forth on questioning it multiple times, but kept coming to the conclusion that no, when I really quiet my own brain and reach out, there truly is nothing else there. It's just me.

...So it turns out I had completely misunderstood how monoconscious systems work, and if you happen to be monoconscious, trying to kill your own brain "making up" responses tends to also kill any headmates' responses. Oops.

We've been quiet about this for a little while now, because Viridian's not wanted to get a ton of attention while she was still getting her feet under her, but she's finally decided she's comfortable being public about her existence, so here we are. The only reason I'm making an announcement post is because I'm about to post an essay we co-wrote that will be very confusing if I don't, LMAO.

She can be found over at @/emerald-technologist, though things we co-write or that are relevant to both of us - which will be most actual essays, because of the fact that I'm (so far, at least, and we have no intention of trying to change it) always fronting and thus things basically always get at least some input from me - will probably end up posted or reblogged to both blogs, so.

Let's also just say this right off the bat: if you're gonna be pissy about origins, endogenic systems, or syscourse in general, take it to me, not to her. Anyone who tries to start shit with her will just be blocked on sight; she doesn't want to deal with that. I am usually happy to debate such things, as long as I have the energy; just take it up with me.

(Also, note that while I call her Viridian, she does prefer her surname, Caldwell, from strangers; she'll accept either and won't be offended if someone firstnames her, but it's a cultural thing for her.)

[sophieinwonderland]

So I saw a doc going around accusing me of being a dangerous person. Which, cool! I've been trying to get anti-endos to see me as a threat and I only see this as being helpful to that end.

Just because you tell people to not interact with someone you're accusing of being dangerous doesn't mean they'll actually listen. I view the notoriety as a positive.

That said, I started reading and it feels like it's largely a lot of nothing. Frankly, I'm pretty disappointed.

Before I get into that...

I barely know who you are, and had no idea you were writing this document. And even if I did, how would I know the specific contents of it to try to "soften the blow?"

That makes no sense!

But I actually wanted to cover their first piece of evidence, because wow! There is really, so much nothing there!

Let me try to summarize this incident because this gets a bit hard to follow.

The inciting incident

On December 5th, 2022, (according the doc, I don't have the date memorized) I responded to a post from a blog, referenced above as Halex...

After this, SAS (on the JustAnotherSyscourse blog) responded to my post.

Meanwhile, Halex also told me to stop interacting with their posts.

So rather than respond any further to them in that thread, since I still wanted to continue the argument with SAS, I screenshotted SAS's reblog of my own post, and then just made a public response to that and that alone. A response that has no link to Halex, didn't show their name, and would not appear in their notifications.

It is not, in any way, shape or form, interacting the them.

At this point, Halex blew up at me and told me to "get out of their reblogs" as if they somehow own the reblogs of their posts.

Now, if you're smart and know anything about how Tumblr works, you would probably realize that getting that screenshot did not require me to go onto Halex's blog. I get the notification in my inbox that SAS replied to me (on the JustAnotherSyscourse blog), I click on that notification. I then screenshot only the parts posted by SAS.

In all of this...

When did I ever interact with Halex's post or blog after they told me not to?

I respect their boundary and didn't interact with them in this case. But telling me not to interact with SAS is a stupid boundary they don't get to make.

The "Block Evasion"

There seem to be three claims of me "block evading."

The first is the ridiculous one above where they seemed to think me screenshotting SAS was somehow interacting with them. I shouldn't need to go into how stupid that is again. (I can't even remember if I was blocked at that point by them. I don't think I was, but it's beside the point because I wasn't interacting with them.)

The second involved screenshotting their syscourse blog ("Oops") months later which had a "Sophie DNI" banner on it.

I saw the posts I screenshotted in the public tags because this systems was, in fact, really bad at blocking.

While I was blocked on the Halex blog, I was not on the the Oops blog. Even quotes in the document admits this:

And as far as I'm aware, there wasn't even anything linking the Oops blog to the Halex blog, so even if I knew that I was blocked on the Halex blog, I wouldn't have connected them at the time. I just saw them as separate blogs ran by completely separate people.

As far as I recall, I haven't interacted with this blog or screenshotted it since they actually blocked me.

The third accusation of block evading was this...

Where I reblogged a post from Cambrian that happened to be replying to their third blog.

Again, Tumblr doesn't allow you to reblog someone who you're blocked by. I couldn't view their blog to reblog from them directly, nor could I reblog a post if they were the OP. Cambrian, a system I follow, made a post. This system argued with them. Cambrian responded. And I reblogged Cambrian's response, in a post Cambrian was the OP of. Which I saw on Cambrian's blog. That I follow.

So to recap, the so-called "block evasion" was...

Screenshotting someone who was not the person who had me blocked. (If I was actually blocked at the time.)

Screenshotting someone's blog posting a banner with my name and avatar on it, which ALSO DIDN'T HAVE ME BLOCKED ON THAT BLOG!

Reblogging a mutual who I follow who happened to be talking to someone who had blocked me.

The last, I'll admit, is at least a bit of a gray area. But "you can't reblog posts from your mutuals if I'm talking to them" still feels like a pretty silly boundary to me.

So this whole part below... it's nonsense.

Yeah, of course I'm not going to respect a Sophie DNI banner.

It's a joke.

I don't care if they're upset or distressed. They could have just learned how to actually block people if it bothers them that much. Putting a target on someone by name with a banner you attach to all your posts isn't a "basic boundary."

Absolutely nothing about this is standard!

In my years on Tumblr, both before and after that incident, I've never seen anyone else make a "[specific person] DNI" banner with their name and avatar.

This isn't commonplace. Absolutely nobody does this.

And it was even more hilarious when I found out that this happened over an incident where they decided me interacting with someone else was breaking their boundaries.

Can we just talk about the hypocrisy for a moment?

So according to them, screenshotting SAS was somehow block evading Halex. Screenshotting OOPS was block evading them despite the fact that THEY DIDN'T EVEN HAVE ME BLOCKED ON THAT BLOG. Reblogging Cambrian was also block evading

All of these things, they'll pretend are block evading.

But again, all these boundaries are being treated as one-way.

The user who compiled this doc, who I won't name, has me blocked. But apparently sees no issue with going through my posts to compile a massive callout document about me.

Maybe their logic is that their own actions don't count because they blocked me instead of the other way around, but something tells me that if I had blocked them, it probably wouldn't stop them from mentioning me and screenshotting my posts.

I'm probably not done with this yet. There are so many terrible arguments and so much misinformation in that doc that I can mock and mine it for content for ages. But this is good for now.

[sssssaarn]

In relation to that essay I wrote about not being plural, I have found/heard of some terms that are pretty close to describing my experiences, but they all have their own problems for me, personally. I'm not researching very intensely into terms, and I am mainly sharing this for others who might find these terms better to describe themselves than I did!

Under the cut because it kind of got long, oops.

The first is polymind, the definition (from the official wiki page) is as follows: "people who are able to distinguish their subpersonalities so well to the point they are perceived as unique beings."

There are a few problems with it (for me, personally), those being that: 1. It has been tossed around in syscourse as a 'non-harmful alternative to endo', despite the original creator specifically saying it did not coin it to 'replace' anything, and also not having syscourse opinions.

2. Because of its involvement in syscourse, its definition has become less clear, with some even saying that it's for 'systems who just don't want to call themselves systems'. Ignoring the fact that labels are a completely personal choice + preference, and you should not force any one label onto anyone, I feel like if I called myself polymind it would incidentally give others the wrong first impression. (That being that I'm anti-endo, which I'm not.)

3. I wouldn't use the word '(sub)personalities' to refer to these beings in my mind. Because the 'characters' I have in my brain get very individualized based on how much I write about them, and so they're not my personalities, they're facets of my writing. Also, having them be called personalities just brings to mind 'multiple personality disorder', the older and widely considered offensive term for DID (before it got renamed to DID). (I am going to repeat that this is personal preference for me, and I am aware that the more widely used term in the community is 'minds', which I do like -- but it's more this specific word in the definition that I can't relate to.)

The second term is multiself, its definition (from the coining post) is this: "Multiself is an umbrella term for any singlet/singlet adjacent being that experiences multiple identities/selves."

This term actually fits me pretty accurately! Since I experience 'myself' through stories, and especially through characters, I tend to view myself through the lenses of characters, even if I don't necessarily identify as them. For example: Saarn is a character I identify as, whereas someone like, say, V1 from Ultrakill is a character I don't identify as but can see myself in in some ways. If I wrote a lot about V1, I would begin to be able to 'think' more like it.

The main problems I have with this term is that 1. It was coined by a radqu.eer. I do not want to get involved with that community whatsoever, but unfortunately even if you just use the identity and try to separate it from its origins, people will still make assumptions about you if you use it. I don't want to have to tag every post I make with 'antiradqu.eer multiself' because that honestly would just be a pain. I've also said this before but making a giant post (or DNI, or BYI) about my opinions would just take too long and would be a pain to update all the time. Plus, who would read all my opinions on increasingly niche discourses?

2. Because it is a much more recently coined term, and thus isn't popular, there isn't much of a community. The tag for multiself is mostly just coining posts -- which aren't necessarily bad! But there's just not a lot of actual discussion (like if you look into the polymind tag for example, you'll see a lot more discussion from others of their experience being polymind). This means that it would be harder for other beings to understand what multiself actually is, and more likely for beings to brush it off (similarly to polymind) as 'systems not wanting to call themselves systems'.

The third term is soulbonding, its definition (from this carrd) is: "Soulbonding is when a person, often after forming a strong connection to a fictional character or world, can communicate with characters in their mind."

And yeah, out of all three of these terms, this one is probably the most accurate! I would love to use it, but again, it does come with its own problems (I think 'baggage' would probably be better to call it, at this point, since most of my problems aren't even with the terms themselves but with people making assumptions about them).

1. It has sort of been absorbed into the plural community, despite there being evidence that not all soulbonders consider themselves plural. That's why I had to specify in my essay 'non-plural soulbonding'; otherwise, again, people would make assumptions.

2. Because of its absorption into the plural community, the actual soulbonding community itself has basically... Died. There are still people posting in the tags, of course, but there aren't any popular, active Discords or forums I could find. Mainly, it seems like most soulbonders stick to isolated parts of the web. This presents the same problem as multiself, where it can be harder to find or understand information about it, because no one is actually talking about it!

3. The term has gained a heavy spiritual connotation, as in "I'm literally communicating with this character that's in another world" or something similar to that. I'm not talking down to spiritual soulbonders (that'd be hypocritical of me), but it doesn't relate to how I see the characters from my writing. And I think the 'soul' part of 'soulbond' only adds to this connotation.

Out of all these terms, soulbonding is probably the one I'm most likely to use, even with all the misinformation or assumptions about it... But it would be and is exhausting to explain the same things over and over again. (Another reason why I wrote up my original essay, I was tired of saying "I'm not plural, even though I have some similar experiences to plurals, please stop recommending me to 'do more research' because I already have identified as a system and it didn't fit me".)

Then again... I guess dealing with misinformation around these terms wouldn't be much different from the misinformation already around alterhuman, otherkin, otherhearted, etcetera. Maybe I just need to get over myself.💀

Again, these are all personal opinions! If I accidentally got any information incorrect here, then please politely tell me, instead of sending hate, or whatever. Hate is not a very effective way to get people to listen to you.

[asexualautistic]

we’ve been mutuals for so long and i had no idea you were a system. hi, me too 👋👋

Hi!! Yes!! We are very much plural and don’t necessarily try to hide it but it doesn’t come up too much on this blog!

We have a lot of headmates, some are disordered/adaptive and some are just kinda… here for companionship or because we projected on a character too close to the sun.

I try to stay out of syscourse though but if you want our opinions on that you can dm us! (though as a rule of thumb we are usually anti exclusionism on… most things)

We also casually kin, it used to not be so casual and we used to run a semi-popular kin askblog but i forget the url oops. Then we realized most of our kin were actually headmates. oopsie :p

But yeah! We are Hell Brain System and The Ark (sub)System!

Feel free to send asks or dm us about our system, this goes out to anyone who’s curious we love talking about it!!

[sinretrograde]

The thing I'm having trouble with is mainly that our system is seemingly never "stable" and there's always changes, a new member forms but nope actually it was an existing member who's "presence" morphed into something else with a new identity entirely, nope actually I lied that was a new member but they just blended together soon after the new forming, did you think you knew who you were nope nevermind bc your sense of self just rapidly changed again

It's like I'll never be able to carve out my own space and my own sense of being in the world because I'll always be changing, by the time I feel comfortable saying here I am and this is me then oops nope nevermind you are now actually two or more guys smoothed into one and now you'll have to reckon with that and what it means for your sense of identity and individuality...

...

I read a post once that said something along the lines of "being a system isn't actually being multiple people in one body, it's being less than one person, a fragment of a person, never feeling whole"

And while it was in the context of syscourse and trauma vs endo, that line stuck with me because that's truly how I feel about this whole... everything...

And I'm jealous, I'm extremely jealous, of those who can seemingly draw lines in the sand and who feel comfortable having names and hobbies and friends and their own spaces and their own lives and sharing that life with their other system members in a positive way

But I just feel so lonely, even with the ability to talk with my fellow system members (and even then, through the shifting of our identities around like sand in waves, often times it just goes full silent for a month or two and then their voices start to show up again, it's a small comfort and idk how singlets deal with being alone in their head, it's scary)

I feel so isolated from the real world, I'm so disconnected from everyone, I've faced nothing but criticism for the rapid changes in our hobbies, interests and stuff like that from people who are supposed to be our friends, no real support from them, I've learned to keep everything to myself and that ends up including this struggle with parsing my own identity in the face of a shifting wave of names and personalities and I just get lost and then overwhelmed and I feel like I'm drowning...

At first system discovery, we really could manage it, there was only ever like 3 or 5 guys at once, and they didn't seem to change much, and they were distinct and easy to know when we were ourselves vs someone else in our system, and it helped, it worked out for the most part even through some doubts and difficulties... now it's so hard to tell what I'm even thinking, and I feel like I SHOULD be happy, if this is integrated or whatever, but I just feel like I'm keep loosing myself over and over again...

I feel like less than a person

[boxedforyourdemise]

So I was in an argument in a good anti endo server I'm in aaaaaand... Can't believe I have to say this but

Polyfragmented OSDD CAN exist. We are polyfrag. We have met other polyfrag OSDD systems. OSDD is NOT just "DID lite". It is not any less severe nor is there necessarily any less dissociation. OSDD systems aren't just confused DID systems. We are medically recognized as an OSDD system.

There are sources saying it is possible but I beg you to find a source that doesn't that isn't cherry picked. Scales don't count.

Aaaandd some sources (tw for ra/mind control for the second one)

https://scholarsbank.uoregon.edu/xmlui/bitstream/handle/1794/1276/Diss_1_1_2_OCR_rev.pdf

[thecirculararchive]

Radical Inclusiveness Can Be Harmful To Yourself

I don’t even want to talk about how radical inclusiveness harms others - the paradox of tolerance has been discussed. I want to talk a little about my experiences being radically inclusive and what I’m only just now starting to work through now that I have therapy and a new community.

Radical inclusiveness is not welcoming.

This seems counter intuitive, I know, but it’s true. Being radically inclusive inherently means you’re going to exclude others. And getting into those radically inclusive spaces may seem easy at first - just say you support everyone!! - but then you need to stay that way, and support everyone (so long as they’re the everyone that everyone agrees with.)

When I first joined the radically inclusive pro-endo community, I often agreed with anti-endos as well. An anti-endo would say something like “fuck terfs.” Uh. Duh? I would reblog it. And .5 seconds later, I would get an ask asking if I was anti-endo, or informing me that that person was anti-endo. I could never simply agree with someone. (Note; this is also a problem in the anti-endo community, and I’m not trying to say it isn’t. But this problem was VERY big when I was pro-endo, and how as an anti-endo, I haven’t gotten a single message about reblogging from pro-endo blogs). The community welcomed “me” - but only the “me” that was ONLY pro-endo.

Radical inclusiveness is lonely.

You’d think that a community centered on accepting everyone would be more positive. But every second of every day, it was just more exclusionary practices. It was pushing every single person away from you that didn’t share the radical inclusive motto. I was a genuine traumagenic system in endogenic spaces, praying to find someone like me who was also struggling. But there was this narrative that Endogenics biggest struggle was Being Oppressed by Sysmeds, and while I absolutely agree that the behavior I saw from anti-endos while I was radically inclusive was abbhorant… I also was so alone. I was struggling to even keep afloat. I was suicidal, depressed, and half of the time convinced I was losing my mind. And I tried to never show that - because struggling wasn’t part of the Positivity of Radical Inclusiveness. It’s not Good to be seen Struggling because Radical Inclusiveness is Good. ):

Radical Inclusiveness causes you to agree with things you never would’ve agreed with.

I have never agreed with system hopping or system resets. The sound of them is scary, and even when I was pro-endo, I sort of thought they were bullshit bit sounded just like the sort of bullshit That Bitch (my derogatory name for one of my abusers) would’ve said to me during her manipulation of our system. But back when I was pro-endo, I absolutely agreed with it - because not agreeing with it felt like I was going to lose my support system. If I didn’t agree with the majority of Rad Inclus., then I was going to be even more lonely, even more isolated. And that’s why I even started to do the next part.

Radical inclusiveness makes you disagree with things you agree with, or worse, makes you deny your own experiences.

I remember an anti-endo and myself discussing trauma, and how you need trauma before the age of 9 to be a system. And I said, direct quote here, “I need a better answer to make this hatred believable and viable.” Note: this anti-endo was kind, considerate, and answered my genuine questions, despite me being a bit of an aggressive pro-endo. They didn’t antagonize me. They just let it drop. And there I was, ignoring the one thing I love (sources) because… I was radicalized. I disagreed with valid sources and claims because… it was what I needed to do to remain unconditionally loved.

And my last point (at least for now - there’s so much more but it’s late and I’m tired, and this topic is draining):

Radical Inclusiveness Can (Re)Traumatize You.

You’ve seen me mention unconditional love a few times on this blog (and even this post) by now. The reason I mention it is because that’s my main trauma. I grew up in an overbearing household, where love was conditional. I was in an abusive relationship, where love was conditional. And then, I came into radically inclusive spaces… where love is conditional.

I was supported - but only when I agreed. Only when I followed what others wanted me to say. And that’s why I did it. My trauma led to me craving that feeling of safety, and welcoming, and love. It’s part of why I seek validation so much from friends. If someone dislikes me - hates me even - then I’m doing something wrong, and need to change everything about myself to fix it. And that’s what I did, day after day, when I was involved in pro-endo syscourse.

Today, I spoke with my therapist about Endogenics. This was after an anti-endo Re triggered all these emotions I had, and after I had a few flashback moments to trauma I had gotten during my radically inclusive phase. And I had a bit of an epiphany.

I am traumatized by the conditional love of radical inclusion.

I have been sent so much hate Mail. I check my inbox in the morning to see not if I have hate mail, but how much. I have been called a sysmed more times than I can count by now. And… this blog is neutral. I’ve just been reblogging more anti-endo things because… anti-endos are actually showing me unconditional love. They’re showing me and telling me that the harassment I’ve faced, from both sides, wasn’t okay. They’re telling me my opinions are valid, despite my past. They’re telling me my opinions are valid, even when my opinions are not shared by the majority.

And that’s something I never got. Lately, pro-endos have shown me how they treat someone who used to be one of them. Someone who doesn’t fit a standard model of traumagenic-ness. I still don’t. But you have treated me like shit lately. And there are so many more NOT radically inclusive people that AREN’T treating me like shit.

This is a ramble by now. I just want to close with this; I have never been more glad to no longer be radically inclusive. I have people now. A support system (ha, puns.)

I am happier now than I ever was when pretending to be happy for pros.

[nightfallsystem-moved]

Nightfallsystem - Main blog. Plural System. cringe asf autistic and chronic pain haver. giant isopod enthusiast.

READ MY DNI AT THE BOTTOM OF THIS POST!!!

IF I FOLLOW U / REBLOG FROM U RANDOMLY / ACT LIKE WE'RE MUTUALS U PROBABLY FOLLOWED/INTERACTED ON MY BLOG @qiekz OR @qiekzart

‼️hi guys if ur reading this during october 2023 plz check out @qiekzart rn im doing a thing ✨✨

Check out my etsy plzzz :333 i post adoptables !!

My name is Qiekz, my pronouns are it/its, please use my actual preferred pronouns. For your DNI purposes please know I'm 14 ^_^ also no nsfw interaction or you will fucking die!! im also learning japanese! (please send help.... im dying..... grahh.. ive gone too far to quit its kind of my curse now.)

what to expect from this blog? random shit, this is my personal blog. there may be vents and rants (tagged as #vent and #rant respectively) there may be random shit there will be so many reblogs.

i try to add ids when i can into the alt text, though i have chronic pain so sometimes im too tired to, sorry

Special interests: Giant isopods, Yugioh 💀💀

interests: TBHK, manga and anime, servals, marine animals, suicide boy (critical of it...), made in abyss, (critical of it...) , japanese language ,, ... i forgor

FEEL FREE (i encourage you to!) TAG ME IN SHIT ABOUT MY INTERESTS!!! esp yugioh im really autistic about it o my god

#autistic about this thing tag <- will be me tagging shit im really autistic about!!

not really in discourse anymore other than transgender stuff so if you try to drag me into discourse ill drag you into the pits of hell. i fucking hate syscourse so much.

If i am not speaking and another system member is, the post will be tagged as "- [name]". I tag common triggers, flashing lights and eyestrain, etc, these will be tagged as "TW [topic]". also JSYK i block a fuck ton of people so like, yeah, I block anyone for any reason I want. I will also not unblock you. unless youre liek my friend or smth.

We have so many fictives sooo,, source list: TBHK, Omori, OneShot, Wolf Song the Movie (yknow, that one on youtube.), yugioh..... </3 .. sourcemates r cool to interact n stuff feel free to send an ask im just shy...

anon hate MUST be original no lame "kys" or "[slur]". i will judge you. try better. try harder. get good. if you send anon hate i will judge it and rate it out of 10 so please try your best.

i am weirdo fictionkin heres the list: hooni from suicide boy yayy,, faputa from made in abyss ( I FUCKING HATE THE SORUCE FOR BEING SO WEIRD OMFG AHGHH),, jolteon from pokemon. . im weird and fuckd up . much prefer if u dont rlly seperate me from me in sources. cuz i just am me. sorry. ig. just refer to me as me . thank you

I am critical of all of my interests!!

or more just i hate them agh just be normal omfgggg crying sobbing

if you wanna avoid a common trigger its most likely tagged #tw [topic]. i also tag eyestrain and flashing lights but usually i just tag it as "#eyestrain" or "#flashing". tbh i unfortunately cant be trusted to remember to tag any other specific trigger because of bad memory. i wont tag reclaimed slurs but i will tag slurs used in a mean way

Please do not DM me unless you actually really need to. Send me an ask if you want to DM me and specify that you want it answered privately if you want. but i AM UNCOMFY WITH DMS. unless we're friends or i DMed you first. otherwise i place a curse on you I MUCH prefer asks over DMs

Sideblog list

@omori-addict

@oops-all-traumacore (TW TRAUMACORE)

@sunnymogai (inactive)

@hellhoundmutt (inactive)

@sunnymogai2 (inactive)

@qiekz (EYESTRAIN + FLASHING TW please block if you are affected by that please)

@qiekzart

@tsukasabrainrot

alter blog 4 tasma:

@tazmahell

@tazmaboxed

DNI:

Anti plural, pluralphobe, anti endo, sysmed, against created alters/etc, "dont believe in systems",

Proship, condone or support posting any sexual stuff that includes a child, lolicon/shotacon/etc, someone purposely meant to look like a child, cub.

LGBTQphobic, transmed, transphobe/homophobe/biphobe/panphobe/etc, 'super straight'/variants, anti-ace inclusion, anti-aro inclusion, anti a-spec inclusion, aphobes, anti mspec lesbian/gay/etc, stelliophobic, anti lesboy/turigirl/etc, anti any good faith queer identity, anti neopronouns, anti xenogender, anti mogai.

Ableist, support autism speaks, think "narc abuse" is a thing/demonise people with any disorder including NPD, infantalise people with disorders/disabilities/etc, post/support on subreddits like r/fakedisordercringe or r/systemscringe, use the term "Aspergers" / describe urself as an "aspie" (Hans Asperger was a nazi who killed many disabled people, so shut the fuck up.)

Racist, cultural appropriators.

Radqueers, trans-id/transX, transrace/trace (not adoptee term), support the term transplural, pro-contact/contact-complex/contact-neutral for harmful paraphillia, sway people away from getting help for harmful paraphillia, MAP/Pedo/zoo/necro. (also transspecies is ok if its not used in a transX way)

Fujoshi/variants. fetishize mlm/wlw, etc.

Against traumacore / vent art.

Have minors on ur DNI (no offense im just a minor lol), NSFW-Focused blog

Post stolen art (includes AI images) / trace art without consent

other stuff is im neutral on factkin or kff tbh. and i think id rather stay neutral on tulpas as a term. i just dont fucking care. i dont involve myself in syscourse anymore, i might post more endogenic positivity later but id rather not due to the rampant harassment and infighting in the system community.

[sysmedsaresexist]

We aren't active on syscourse tumblr anymore, or sysblr in general (just follow a few blogs we like or consider friends), so could you summarize the whole Weskcourse thing?? Who are they, what happened? Also, are you JAS? (I assume the acronym is Just-Another-Syscourse but one can never be too certain! - Prime

UHM, yeah... I can do a dirty, barebones type thing, it's been a week of stuff

Yeah, I'm JAS, justanothersyscourse

- I got put on a blocklist with a couple others, and someone who shouldn't have been on it (this someone was replaced three times with more people who shouldn't have been on it when they received pushback)

- I reblogged the blocklist with a meme because blocklists are dumb, and we ended up going back and forth about whether blocklists were any good and how they were maliciously putting people on it (the last person put on the list was DEFINITELY put there maliciously because of a post they THOUGHT was vagueing them). The blocklist and all arguments are now deleted from OPs blog, but still on mine if anyone wants to go back and check

- weskcourse jumped into this entire argument randomly with this cryptic shit about how I ruined their life three years ago by breaking their DNI (I wasn't on tumblr then, but I was also apparently LISTED in this DNI??), and then I, APPARENTLY, refused multiple requests to take down this post, and blocked all their accounts so they couldn't "bother" me anymore

- I (shockingly) gently (clearly I have trouble with that) explained that I had no idea who they were, or what I might have done, and I have only ever had two people blocked, and I very frequently engage with people who ask me to change or remove posts to figure it out, but if they could show me the post, I would own up to it and apologize

- They changed the timeline to under two years ago, and provided a post I had made about a screenshotted DNI. It's here if you want to scroll, but it was a completely normal DNI with no identifiable features, and it really wasn't anything even interesting? The last point was, "DNI if you think alters can't have disabilities the body doesn't," and I posted it with, "What kind of disabilities?"

(their current DNI was the exact opposite of all other points, for example, the original was DNI pro ship, and weskcourse's current DNI listed them as being pro ship and pro non contact, etc)

EDIT: I did own up to the post and apologize, in case anyone is wondering

- after the post, I received an anon saying, "no, I remember this, you said mean stuff to me about using the word 'cripple'", which immediately jogged my memory, and I pointed out that THAT was from a completely different blog, in regards to the post-- they were mixing me up oops-all-syscourse (not to be confused with the new blog, oopsallsyscourse), and I provided screenshots of the back and forth THEY had been doing about alters with disabilities

- weskcourse then explained (despite the above) that my post had lead their stalker to them, despite it being actually pretty tame and having no identifiable information

- said stalker then randomly showed up in all this professing their love and devotion to me and threatening to leak weskcourse's info

- stalker posted his IP, which was fake-- it's a private IP anyone can use to login and adjust the settings to their router, so that was dumb

- stalker then posted an address that doesn't exist in Canada's postal code database, which weskcourse immediately reblogged with, essentially, "yeah, that's my address" and then started telling everyone and their mother to kill themselves

- stalker started sending me ask after weird yandere ask and I'm rolling my eyes

- when it was pointed out that the IP was fake, the stalker blog immediately disappeared, and it's up for debate whether it was reported and removed, or the person deleted

- another blog VAGUELY and strangely involved in this (not sure if they want to be mentioned, but it raises eyebrows based on the above) received an anon with the stalker's Discord About Me, but never posted it.

- now this random 3 day old blog, ALSO has that about me, and these random chats with everyone in weskcourse's life, and claims to share a server with stalker

- Stalker then tried to join MY server but was instabanned before anyone even told me it had happened

- I made a vague post about cops and weskcourse deleted

The end

[justanothersyscourse]

nervous to reblog this on our main blog but here's my experience with endos

for a while before we started questioning osdd we were on this site called quotev. there were a fair few systems on the site and generally no endos so when i was beginning to accept that i was a system i didn't have much interaction with that community, except the one time we went to cancel an alleged endo system for purposely triggering people. (a lot of cancel culture on there. makes me wish i could break away from it, but anyway!)

but generally it was all did/osdd systems over there (though its a very minor heavy community and people diagnose each other without much research and i feel like some of them are experiencing something that feels like did/osdd but isn't, but i can't see in their minds, so i'm not going to go and try to f//keclaim them.)

so when i first got onto system tumblr I was actually shocked to see the number of endo systems and all the syscourse because the only communities id been in were all asserting that "trauma is the only way you can get a system", with only a tiny bit of opposition so it was really strange to me to see the prevalence of endos over here.

anyway i managed to mostly avoid the endo stuff as a baby system (thats probably not an actual term oops) but i sometimes run across the syscourse over here n the number of people ive had to block to feel safe... gosh

HOW DID I MISS THIS?? I’m sorry, Anon! 

In response to this post.

I’ve actually never heard of that site, maybe I’ll poke around a bit, see what’s going on. Tumblr was also MY first introduction to “endogenic” systems, and I was... floored, to say the least, to see the things being said. 

BABY SYSTEM IS ALSO A TERM I’VE USED BEFORE LOL

I’m glad you’re managing good self-care by blocking blogs, and I’m so, so glad you shared. Thank you so much <3

[antirealisation]

Dang it, we were planning for Thomas to go to the voice-hearing group today, but, discussions of exotrauma and then now that syscourse post I’m very clearly vaguing, I’m here kinda settled into front. >:/

(Weird feelings about one of us potentially showing up More Often than the other and thus becoming The Main One to them. We sure don’t think too highly of singlets, huh? :V)

But liiiike, sheesh, I’m defensive about the term “exotrauma” and people who use it.

Just, calling it “exotrauma” has led to seeking out way more help than years of “these are fake imaginary memories that I can’t be having, that are less important than anything happening to the body, that aren’t symptoms of anything addressable I’m just inherently this broken.” I dunno why that’s a hard thing for people to see? “Oh, I think this is actually a form of trauma” -> “Maybe I should... stop ignoring it and actually treat it like trauma, oops.”

[solipsistful]

"dissociative voices are inside the head; psychotic ones are outside" continues to be one of those things that sound So Nice And Simple, doesn't it? Clear Proof of a Real Difference between diagnostic categories --

and also no goddamn empirical backing, with actual extensive studies coming to the conclusion that, based on the phenomenology of the voices alone, there is no real clear way to differentiate between voices in the diagnosed-psychotic vs diagnosed-dissociative (vs non-clinical) lmfao oops

(ooone daaaay there will be a study that lays out its data in such a way as to conclusively indicate that yes some people without trauma report those "characterful voices" too (most research further divides only based on diagnosis v. non-clinical, not trauma history). not that it'll matter as a syscourse argument, but it'd still be nice to see.)

- Ace

[thecirculararchive]

(same anon as before)

I think some people tend to get very aggressive about arguments they're emotionally invested in. And ofc internet anynonimity makes it easier to be nasty, especially if people are used to being in an echo chamber. Though ofc that doesn't justify harrassment in the slightest. The things you say get me to challenge and examine my own viewpoints, and that's healthy and constructive.

Idk i'm not good with words, i just wanted to express that I appreciate your blog and what you do with it. I'm sorry you get the amount of hate that you do. But your blog cultivates a meet-in-the-middle space that's harder to find within syscourse. It's good for the community.

I hope you're taking care of yourself.

Hello again!!! Yeah we’re taking care of ourselves. The hate Mail and constant discussion of us in gags we frequent is very hard and we actually stepped away for a bit there! A nice nap (that lasted… THREE HOURS? Oops!!!!) and a switch later, and we’re well enough to be back!

[sophieinwonderland]

the majority of anti-endos I have seen actually support the idea that Endogenics could exist.

I feel like this is trying to sanitize anti-endo beliefs. I've seen way too many anti-endos repeating the lies that it's scientifically impossible to experience multiple people in one body with DID/OSDD. I've seen too many claim that the only way to be "plural" (a term coined by non-DID/OSDD systems specifically to differentiate them from DID/OSDD systems) is to have DID or OSDD.

@oops-all-syscourse reblogged this sanitization of anti-endo beliefs, and then immediately undermined that with the following ask:

And I'm not asking you to answer for someone else's posts. I just want to make it clear that your observations don't seem to be representative of the majority of anti-endo systems I've seen.

This idea that anti-endos are just insulted by the labels we call ourselves is nonsense. Maybe it's true in some cases, but the vast majority that I've seen hold the above opinion. This idea that we wouldn't be harassed and attacked if we just changed what we call ourselves is a nice fantasy, but it's just that. It's a fantasy.

Again, non-DID/OSDD systems created the term "plural" just to have anti-endos not only take the term but tell us that we aren't allowed to use it anymore. The terms we call ourselves might add fuel the fire, but from everything I've seen, anti-endos hate us because we exist in public, no matter what we call ourselves.

I wanted to address a common claim I see from Endogenics.

“By saying we’re actually traumagenic systems, you’re telling us we are liars and you’re telling us our experiences are wrong; that we are not experiencing what we are experiencing.”

No. We aren’t.

1. Lying takes forethought and planning. It takes purposeful action to decide to lie. There are some people arguing that Endogenics are liars, but the majority of anti-endos I have seen actually support the idea that Endogenics could exist. They also simply support Occam’s Razor.

2. While you are not lying to describe your experiences, you can be misinformed. You can use incorrect terminology - such as the “integration” vs “fusion” debate, if we’re looking for an intracommunity discourse. This is what the majority of anti-endos seek to correct and offer advice on.

3. In this disorder, what you’re experiencing… may actually not be what you’re experiencing. We experienced an “alter death,” but it wasn’t that. It was dormancy. I was so mad to hear “you didn’t experience alter death” because I felt like I had - but acknowledging the truth was so vitally important to healing. It helped me understand my experiences to know the proper terminology, because it finally gave me hope and guides of how to improve my mental health. “Alters go dormant and that’s okay” was a very different mentality than “alters can die and are gone forever.” That’s just one specific example of something that happens all the time.

I just wanted to explain this a little. My students are back from lunch so I need to go, but you can have a little syscourse, as a treat.