#only to be disappointed that there is not some greater answer he missed

[raintemper]

I struggle to accept being a bug.

[actiasteeth]

ASKBOX MEME 058 / ARCANE S02E04-06

All prompts taken from season two of Arcane (2024). Adjust as needed.

04. PAINT THE TOWN BLUE

“I never expected this to go on so long.”

“I thought— I don’t know what I thought. Just… it wasn’t this.”

“They follow you. I follow you.”

“No, no. What are you doing? Show some effort.”

“All right, all right. I still think it’s a dumb idea. But I guess you won, and a deal’s a deal. I guess.”

“I thought I was rid of her for good, but, uh… you kind of remind me of her.”

“Did _____ put you up to this?”

“Keep their name out of your mouth.”

“Our moment will come. But you must be prepared.”

“She hides while you suffer. And yet you refuse to hand her over.”

“The blade cuts both ways.”

“Fearless child. You never shy.”

“Why is peace always the justification for violence?”

“Or maybe I underestimated you. Maybe you have the strength I do not. To forgive and trust in tomorrow.”

“My gaze isn’t averted.”

“Oh, spare me. I wouldn’t have hired you if you weren’t versed in the art of indulging your clients’ egos.”

“Even when she’s not here, she’s all anyone talks about.”

“But the writing’s on the wall. When you’re missing this long, you’re not coming back.”

“Can’t hurt to look, can it?”

“You could have warned me.”

“I told you, I’m not interested.”

“Do you know how much he sacrificed to protect you? He believed in your potential.”

“Stick your head in the dirt if you want. But this fantasy you’ve been living out here— It’s not gonna last forever.”

“Still giving me the silent treatment, huh?”

“It’s no secret we got history.”

“Like it or not, we’re in this mess together.”

“Okay, I get it. We’re playing that game, are we?”

“You know what you are.”

“Well, only leaves the fun option.”

“I’m gonna hate this, aren’t I?”

“Can we focus?”

05. BLISTERS AND BEDROCK

“I don’t wanna hear another word out of your mouth.”

“I’m not falling for another one of your tricks.”

“We both know that’s bullshit.”

“In my experience, only guilty men answer accusations with silence.”

“In my experience, no one in power is innocent.”

“This is your final chance. Tell me what you were planning.”

“You will rot in here.”

“I’d hoped they’d never come for you.”

“This is where I lost him.”

“Not even toxic. Pretty sure.”

“When are you gonna admit that this is just another one of your fantasies?”

“See what I mean? Delusional.”

“You wouldn’t last one second without all your ugly gadgets and chickenshit tricks.”

“Hey, kid. Still got all your insides?”

“Why’d you come get me? You don’t actually need my help. You haven’t for a long time.”

“No beast is more savage than man.”

“I trust you have terms.”

“I do like to disappoint her.”

“Why does anyone commit acts others deem unspeakable? For love.”

“I told myself what I did to you was for the greater good, that you deserved it. But the dirt was on both our hands.”

“He’s gonna kill you.”

“_____. I’d feared I wouldn’t have the chance to speak with you again.”

“I suppose this is somewhat beyond where we left off.”

“We have to end it, _____. We have to.”

“You seem different. Something happened.”

“I can’t let you leave.”

06. THE MESSAGE HIDDEN WITHIN THE PATTERN

“You filthy traitor.”

“You once told me all systems have limits.”

“He is worth the risk.”

“I will do all in my power. However, I have one condition.”

“Your talents can be used to build, instead of destroy.”

“”We”?”

“You've felt it, haven’t you? Your decline.”

“What I wouldn't give to glimpse the world through your eyes. To know what you know.”

“Knowledge is a paradox. The more one understands, the more one realizes the vastness of his ignorance.”

“Do you believe in fate, _____? Our paths carved before us, guided by an invisible hand?”

“Evolution has a destination. Not to combat nature, but to supersede it.”

“I will not sacrifice his humanity for your cause.”

“On the job, I see.”

“You can’t be here.”

“Then we’ll have to force his hand.”

“So much for happy reunions.”

“Had some time to think lately. Ever since you dropped into my life, it’s like I put on glasses. Except I can’t tell whether everything’s blurry or clear.”

“I owe you thanks. Your absence provided a vacuum I was able to fill.”

“You cause too many complications.”

“I have a plan. You’re not gonna like it.”

“Hope I was worth your time.”

“I won’t fail. I swear it.”

“That which inspires us to our greatest good is also the cause of our greatest evil.”

[dancingontheblades]

The Tale That Never Ends Chapter 3

The visa drama

Summary:

While Yuuri keeps practising in Japan, Viktor is pulling out all the stops to have his Yuuri by his side again. But the bureaucracy of his home country proves to be a greater challenge than becoming the five-time world champion.

Excerpt

Viktor’s home in the heart of Petrogradsky Island was as spacious as it was luxurious, and so was his wardrobe. In those nine months which he had been away, he had grown used to selecting from a smaller variety of clothes. But even then, he still frequently struggled to pick the pieces he really wanted to wear and either ended up feeling uncomfortable in something he hated or wearing his favourite clothes for days.

“I don’t remember owning so many clothes,” he muttered to himself as he stared at the orderly stacked T-shirts, long sleeves, sweaters, jeans, and chinos as well as the shirts, suits, and coats on hangers. Not to mention the two drawers of all sorts of shoes, starting at sandals and sneakers and ending at fine leather shoes and snow boots. “But apparently, I do.”

When he had moved to Japan, he had taken only his favourite clothes with him—and these had still forced him to declare extra cargo. His gaze wandered over Gucci suits, Hugo Boss shirts, and Armani shoes. He had not missed the things he had left behind.

“What do you think, Makkachin?” he asked his dog. “Shall I give a some of my clothes away or shall I buy a second wardrobe for Yuuri?”

On his bed, Makkachin opened a weary eye as if he wanted to say “what do I care for what kind of fake fur you wear as long as you smell like you?”

“You’re not helping,” Viktor said. “In one week, Yuuri will be here and he needs space for his clothes.” He stroked his chin. “Unless…”

He hurried to the rack with his suits and pulled out one he had received as a gift when he had endorsed Armani. “Makkachin! Do you think Yuuri would like this? It might be a bit too big, but even a mediocre tailor could fix this.”

Makkachin whined.

“No? Makkachin, you disappoint me. I think Yuuri would look hot in it. I…” He checked his phone. “Well, why don’t we just ask him? It’s almost time to call him anyway.” He opened Skype, swiped to Yuuri’s avatar and pressed call. “Let’s hope he’s awake.”

It took forty-seven seconds until Yuuri answered the call. “Viktor!” he panted. “You’re early.” His messy hair was in total chaos as if he had slept on it. Viktor found him exceptionally cute.

“Hi, Yuuri!” he said and waved at the camera. “I have a question and so I thought ‘why not call earlier?’”

“I was fighting with the printer and hit my head.”

“I’m sorry to hear that. Does it hurt?”

“Not really.”

“Excellent. I was searching my wardrobe for clothes that I could donate and found a few that would look cute on you.”

“Viktor!” Yuuri protested.

 Viktor held up the hanger with the Armani suit. “It’s a timeless piece and the seams are all French in case you are sensitive about such things. It’s lovely, isn’t it?”

“That’s a designer suit!” Yuuri breathed.

“Yes. Do you like it?”

“Yes. But no! I don’t want it!”

Most people that Viktor knew would rejoice at the opportunity to get an Armani suit for free. As this was Yuuri-the-pillow-thief, who had insisted that Viktor wore his coat during the Grand Prix Final short programme so that his scent would be all over it and who had scented his own bed with their lovemaking, Viktor had not expected him to turn such an offer down. “Why?” he asked. “Most of these clothes are basically new. I wore them once or twice at most.”

“I’m not the type for this kind of clothes.” There was a pale blur as Yuuri waved his hands. “It’s not that I don’t appreciate the gesture. I just don’t want to wear such expensive clothes. I’m not a charity cause!”

*~*~*~*

Read the full chapter here.

Cover illustration done by the talented @cosmiclion

[panelshowsource]

this was my first time seeing tim and also getting a chance to say a brief hello! (though, i’m not particularly keen on meeting celebs or comedians and rarely take the opportunity, tim just seemed so approachable and that "this really could be my only chance ever" feeling hit hard, so i did it!; that said, i am incredibly disappointed having missed richard osman's book signing last month, but now i’m digressing…) he seemed so, so chuffed at the show being sold out and people being so happy to see him, it made my heart happy 🥹 and, yes, totally polite! (and quite hairy?) i said this before, but one of the best things about nyc shows is watching artists brim with pride — nyc brings out the 15-year-old dreamer in them that they used to be, you can see the "holy shit i really did it" in their eyes... never gets old!!

(this is a follow-up to a question about which 3 comedians i’d want to have dinner with!)

i think people would typically approach this question one of two ways: you want to meet the people you really, really love no matter what or you want to meet the people you really, really want to know more about. those two things can overlap, but sometimes a person you adore has already shared so much, written so many books, created so much, done so many interviews and answered so many questions that you might feel it's a greater privilege to see behind the door of a fiercely private person instead, if forced to choose. stephen fry and simon amstell are great examples of people i've loved so long, respect so much, find endlessly funny and interesting and inspiring — but they've been so generous with their lives and thoughts that there are other comedians & writers i'd never know 1/100th as well even after a three-hour dinner and their undivided attention, and i may selfishly, desperately want to. i say "may" because i don't really blame anyone who would prefer to live in ignorance about their favourite comedians & writers and just enjoy them through their work. sometimes i think that's how i feel about victoria; she's so witty and so smart and represents so much of what i respect about women in her industry that i love her to bits, but because her opinions can be so strong and even acerbic i'm intimidated by the reality that we may clash in some of our ways of thinking — and, selfishly, i don't necessarily want to face that. anyways—

if we were having dinner all of us together, i think it'd be nice to pick 3 people who are friends and would have a lot to talk about amongst themselves — since i'd mostly be there as a voyeur, or to ask a question to spurn on more stories. there are also comedians i'd pick in this scenario because they'd do much better amongst their own kind than a one on one with a normie...

do you ever regret asking me these kinds of questions bc my answers are always so long and qualified and boring like i type this shit out thinking "who would ever read all this or care even half as much just list the fucking comedians" im so sorry for who i am

...like, really, someone like alex horne...he'll be much better in a group, with his friends to play off of...but fock he's kinda hard to fit in with my other faves...

OKAY

i think for a group dinner i'd enjoy so much seeing catherine tate, lee mack, and david tennant. how epic would be that? the oldest of friends, who used to be in a group on the circuit as kids, and the long-time colleagues and icons, who have ruled tv culture with their talent and their charisma; three open, warm people, all legends in their own rights, with endless stories, who may not otherwise show lower-key sides of themselves. i'd sit at that table forever, i think, learning about the comedy scene, the acting scene, television and movies, how the industry circles have overlapped and evolved and helped and hurt. i could sit at that table forever, i think.

as for one on one dinners, it's too difficult not to say david mitchell (is that so predictable ╥﹏╥ ), who is someone who feels close but far; i think — apart from his love of history — he's offered many more scratched surfaces than deep dives, and i deeply appreciate the spectrum of his career and interests. i couldn't keep him too long because i don't think he appreciates going on and on about himself, and i'm sure i couldn't be too interesting, but man what an experience that would be no matter if it was just a short tea! otherwise, i would say sean lock and...as a kind of wild card...richard osman. i think a lot of people will relate to sean, just wanting to see him again, just wanting a moment of his humanity, his great balance between accepting the harsh and coping what we can. richard is a strikingly fascinating person — the younger brother of a famous rockstar and a massive comedy nerd who went on to become one of the richest comedy tv producers and now a crime author? talk about containing multitudes. he's been around for so long but really hasn't given much of himself away — i'm so curious about his life! and he seems such a polite, gentle, intelligent, insightful person, i think the conversation would just be so enlightening!

as you can imagine i have about 15 other people i'd be dying dying dying to have dinner with but i stuck with the prompt!!! sorry i was so word vomit about it >.<

the thing is julian has 0% dad energy — what he has is INTENSE rich childfree aunt energy. she’s gonna come around for dinner once in a while and wear that fake smile around the kids that makes it very obvious she’s not into them but is happy for you and talk about her recent trip to paris and after about two hours she has to leave 1) to go to the theatre but mostly 2) for her own sanity. as for lucy and sam, i saw an amazing exchange (i think on tiktok?? idr) discussing the quite serious difference at the foundations of james acaster’s and sam campbell’s comedy, since they’re being often erroneously compared, and someone made a point that went more or less like this: “the basis of james’ comedy is the fact he is a deeply angry, self-loathing and mentally ill person. sam is just a toddler who has had way too many lollipops.” and…that’s it. older sister lucy and younger brother sam have had too many lollies — you can even find some in their hair 🍭🍭

well you know what i watched an episode of pointless where THIS FUCKING CLUE got 86!!!!!!!!!! 14 people didn’t get sheep!!!!!!!!!!!!!! so frankly i don’t trust this audience anyways!!!!

hahaha no i just threw it together for that ask post that’s why it’s so sloppy 😂 you can use it if you want!

BONK

aw anon that's so nice! like i said, someone else made that action and i would love to know who (well, i know their name is ana, but have never found their blog in all these years) — the whole community is built on sharing resources and tips! hope you're having fun :')

get out of here!!! these were so sweet. thank you so much. to echo my answer to the anon before these, it's a huge community effort and the people who rip this content are my heroes. i'm happy you have some resources to help you smile and laugh 🥹

—

WATCH LINKS MASTERPOST / FAQ / TAGS / ASK

[awlimagines]

Day Seven - Gustafa

“You can’t be serious,” Molly’s interruption was laced with displeasure. 

Gustafa’s eyes flicked from sharing his Starry Night plans with Griffin to the frowning blonde. When he invited you, you seemed excited about caroling with his friends in Mineral Town. At the men’s confused silence, Molly sighed and explained in greater detail, “Starry Night is supposed to be ro-man-tic. Traipsing through the mountain to sing with strangers in a different town isn’t romantic!” 

“Ah, well, I’m not sure Y/N would like to spend that kind of evening with-” 

“The reason they agreed was to spend time with you!” Molly composed herself from the outburst before gently adding, “C’mon, you have to have a better idea of what you’d like to do with Y/N. Caroling, and then what?” 

Gustafa spent the night second-guessing himself. Did you only agree to spend time with him? It was a battle to convince himself that what Molly said might be true. He almost found it easier to believe you didn’t have plans, but that couldn’t be right. You had befriended the whole valley in nearly a year. Surely, you had choices for Starry Night and still chose him. He finally decided he would try to extend your evening together. Gustafa just needed to find the perfect moment, and if he was wrong about your feelings… Well, it was probably time to move on elsewhere with his yurt. 

“Hey! You, uh- You look nice,” he faltered, admiring your winter ensemble. You didn't say anything if you noticed his words lacked easy eloquence. He felt like an awkward teenager with a crush all over again. His mind struggled to maintain a conversation with you and also plan how to confess his feelings to spend longer than caroling with a group of others. All too soon, you joined the rest of the group on the outskirts of Mineral Town. 

“Oooooh, is this Gustafa’s partner?” one of his friends called in greeting. 

“Um, no! We’re not like that,” you immediately responded. 

Was Gustafa mistaken in hearing disappointment in your voice with that answer? You kept your face carefully hidden from his, making his attempts to confirm unobtainable. It was better this way, he convinced himself. You deserved a better confession than in response to some light teasing from his friends. His attention soon diverted completely to straining to hear your voice amongst the others as the group traveled from house to house. 

“That was fun!” you gushed, stepping in his footprints in the snow falling on the mountain path back to Forget-Me-Not Valley. 

“Yeah! You should sing with me more. I loved getting to hear you tonight,” he warmly smiled.

Your face flushed at his words as you watched his back before you. He probably wasn’t blushing like you. It frustrated you that he could say such things nonchalantly. You missed him pausing as Gustafa turned to warn you of an icy patch the exact moment your foot hit it. His arms wrapped around you, pulling you close to steady you both on the slippery trail. Unsure if the thumping was his heart or yours as you clung to his chest, frozen in time. He wanted to stay suspended in time like this forever, but you were pulling away and muttering thanks all too soon. 

In the distance, the lights of houses in Forget-Me-Not valley twinkled through the early evening. Everyone’s evenings were just beginning, while his was ending with you. Gustafa felt disappointed at the thought, the cold night biting more. He began to feel desperate as the silence between you grew heavy, your steps changing from crunching gravel to echoing on the wooden bridge. 

“Do you want to-?”

“Would you like-?” 

Your words spilled out, tripping over each other as you spoke at the same time. Gustafa felt giddy, knowing you were also trying to extend your night together. It made it much easier to know you didn’t want things to stop. His fingers interlaced with your own as he gently pulled you toward him and his yurt, already confident in your answer.

“Would you like to come over? There are some songs I’d really enjoy singing to you.”

[traditional-with-a-twist]

lvii. Beauty and Her Beast

<<Previous || first arc || second arc || third arc || AO3 || Next>>

Kiki enters the hunting lodge eagerly, her step light and quick, head up, eyes alert.

She is looking for him.

The lady knight would never betray her dignity with excitement, but she has missed Mitsuhide — felt his absence keenly, an unaccustomed space at her side, an ache that has worsened in inverse proportion to the healing of her bone.

Her arm is functional again, regaining its old strength with training and with time.

Time has not healed their parting.

Anger subsided into melancholy, invisible to almost all beneath Kiki’s implacable calm.

Then followed this dull discontent, punctuated with bursts of hot vexation when something brought him to mind — a maneuver on the practice ground, a remark he might have made, a thought she might have shared … if only he had been there.

...

Sometimes she misses him so much, she wishes him gone forever.

Better the certainty of a final and irrevocable farewell than the vexatious hope, repeatedly disappointed.

Kiki took refuge from the strain by renouncing him — casting him off in her heart, declaring the self-exile banished.

She cannot oppose his choice; therefore she affirms it, finding reasons to justify it, embrace it, declare herself satisfied.

If he will go, then she will wish it so.

She won’t think of him, but when she does, she will be glad that he left.

...

At a stroke, his letter swept all that aside.

It had arrived by royal courier, a brief but painstaking thing — perfectly in keeping with the feelings she could easily imagine as animating him.

That mingled sense of shame and duty, peculiar to Mitsuhide, runs through it all. 

He disavows himself, writes as if to strike himself from the record with the very hand then pens it, yet never more clearly has he shown himself honorable in the humility of addressing himself to her.

...

She took it in at a glance, knowing at first only that he had asked for her. 

Annoyance evaporated; her heart lifted. A cloud passed from her countenance.

It had lingered so long that all had forgotten what she looked like without it.

...

A second read apprised her of the circumstances, and her elation turns to urgency.

Mitsuhide had not made the request on his own behalf — of course he had not. He thought of himself first, never.

Kiki had expected something serious when he wrote; he was not a man given to trivialities, nor one likely to disturb a still pond (no matter how much it needed weeding) unless spurred to it.

Still, this news outstripped all expectations.

It answered a mystery — what had become of her friends since Shirayuki’s letters had stopped coming, since it was quietly known that the recently declared heir to one of Clarines’s largest and most prosperous estates had gone missing.

The answer was plain: nothing good.

...

Keenness of purpose mingled with brightness of anticipation, of pain relieved. She presented herself to request leave.

The first prince did not press her for explanations. “You have served well, Lady Kiki, at a time when others might have expected a greater claim on your attendance.”

He saluted her with an elegant hand; she bowed.

“Consider this furlough a token of gratitude for your dedication.”

...

As Izana spoke, he passed Kki a sheaf of papers, which she slid into an unmarked satchel.

Some would be written in code; others were not.

A good many were useless: disconnected excerpts from unrelated reports, taken at random from their proper context.

One contained her instructions for the task she had agreed to undertake, should a plausible occasion arise for her to leave the capital.

...

“Do not press yourself,” urged the prince with his half-lidded smile. “It is only your due.”

...

Kiki rode hard, eating up the miles between her and the origin of that letter.

She weathered the barrage of memories that emerged from the trees along with the hunting lodge.

The brightness of that time had crystallized like a colored pane of glass — fragile, fragmented, yet brilliant in the light of memory.

If she tried to hold on to it, the edges cut into her. She could embrace it only from a distance, and that separation was its own wound.

Another time, the hurt might have penetrated more deeply, but not today.

Hope was her shield, her ward against the doubt and pain of the past.

...

Her first misgiving came when she found the stable empty.

A dozen explanations flicked through her mind, hastening to account for the incongruity. 

She settled on none of them, but let them hover around her thoughts like a curtain, a layer of obfuscation between herself and the dawning possibility that she refused to countenance.

...

Resolutely, she turned and entered the lodge.

Silence greeted her.

The sitting room, the hearth – empty. The coals smoldered; a pot hung on the hearth, but there was no one there.

Kiki stopped.

She looked, and she listened — straining for any trace of her partner-that-was.

Nothing below, so she ascended, unwilling to give up the search, to relinquish her hope.

...

Upstairs, dim candle light flickered under one door.

Kiki’s chest tightened painfully as her pulse accelerated.

She laid a hand on the latch and eased it open.

...

Inside, a solitary figure lay buried in blankets. A flush of red hair left no doubt as to her identity.

Again they were meeting in an in-between place, somewhere on the journey from one home to another.

Then Shirayuki had met them with a confidence alien to her predicament; now she looked scarcely larger than a child, her stillness a mute appeal.

Beside her, there was no one.

Kiki stopped.

Her heart sank.

As it fell, she hardened it, cutting off the shock of dismay before it could immiserate her. She looked and understood and willed herself to feel nothing.

...

“Kiki…”

The voice, delicate as a bird wing, recalled her to sensation.

The lady knight heard her friend’s call, and a gladness tangled with concern kindled in response.

She stepped quickly to the bedside and knelt down.

Shirayuki smiled at her. “You came.”

The tightness returned.

Yes, she had come — for nothing! cried her injured self, the tender core of every human, who all long to receive love where it is given.

...

For a moment, Kiki struggled with herself.

She met the impulse to lash out in pain, and she mastered it.

Coolness returned; she regarded the situation dispassionately and recognized that she had not been summoned without cause.

...

“Yes,” Kiki agreed. “I’m here.”

...

A smile illuminated Shirayuki’s face, restoring a glow of vitality to it.

Gratitude welled up in her.

As was Shirayuki’s way, she sought immediately to share her happiness.

“Mitsuhide—” she began, but Kiki’s face stopped her.

She faltered at the blank look that overtook her friend’s features, the smile vanishing into a void.

“He… he’s not…?”

...

“He has gone,” said Kiki, colorless.

“But… you’re here… How did you find us if…?”

“He sent for me,” came the reply, “and now he has gone.”

...

Shirayuki gazed at her in confusion and real sorrow.

‘Oh,’ she said softly. ‘Kiki, I’m so –’

Her friend rose, avoiding the hand stretched out in consolation.

...

“You must be hungry,” Kiki said quietly. “I will bring you something to eat.”

[actual-lea]

I HAVE FOUND THE ANSWER

So I spent a bit of extra time (one might say extra extra time since it was at half speed) backtracking to get some of the stuff I missed in making a beeline for where I thought Elminster would be, but yesterday I FINALLY started making forward progress again.

Gale was thrilled.

Much like before, I more or less headed straight for the place most likely to trigger any new developments in this very stupid saga, which is obviously Moonrise Towers. (and also if there was a chance I could do the rest of the Shadow-Cursed Lands stuff NOT at half speed, well. that might be nice.)

And just as I crossed the threshold into the Moonrise Towers area (as soon as the location name popped up on the screen)

IT FINALLY HAPPENED

The game grabbed me Gale by the scruff like a misbehaving cat and said "NO"

"YOU WILL PROCEED NO FURTHER"

After 2 turns of "Gale is Paralysed", he "withered away", and the party was transported to camp along with the now very dead Gale. I used a Scroll of Revivify, and who should suddenly pop into existence the moment Gale has 1 HP again but ol' Cheese Grandpa himself.

He launched right into the regular ol' Elminster dialogue, starting from "Gale, m'boy, I've come to address a most pressing matter. I'll speak as plainly as I can, forswearing the accustomed frills that decorate my speech." Everything from there was just the same as if I was meeting him right before entering the Shadow-Cursed Lands, until the end, after he stabilized the orb - the following line comes right after "It is done. Both charge and charm have been committed into your care."

"A shame that we did not cross paths sooner. The orb's thirst for magic is now quenched, yet it already inflicted some damage while you tried to forge ahead."

"The ill effects may linger, I'm afraid. Not enough to hamper your mission, I hope."

And sure enough, once that conversation ended, Gale had the condition Arcane Hunger once again - the first of the three levels (regular, Greater, and Severe), AND since the orb is all stable now, I don't even have the option to consume anything to get rid of this status (there's no "Gale can consume this item" for magic artefacts in the Tooltips anymore, and the Consume option is gone), so I think it's a permanent debuff.

I did a little reloading and experimenting to see what would happen when you trigger this event with each of the different stages of Arcane Hunger, and it looks like Gale will be stuck with (regular) Arcane Hunger afterwards if you start with either Greater or Severe beforehand. I didn't get the extra lines when starting with only regular Arcane Hunger though, and the debuff was gone after the conversation ended.

(Naturally this does mean that upon reloading the final time, in order to avoid the debuff, Gale just sorta quickly wolfed down a hat and a pair of boots while standing right outside Moonrise Towers. I wonder if any of the guards saw. I wonder whether that would be a successful intimidation tactic, or very much the opposite of a successful intimidation tactic.)

SO THERE YOU HAVE IT, the end of this silly, silly quest. I'm actually a little disappointed that I won't get to play the entire remainder of the game while constantly on the verge of exploding, but alas. I'm just glad I'm finally able to JOG AGAIN

(Incidentally I spent a good half hour yesterday walking around while Encumbered without even realizing it because the movement speed is the same lol lmao)

So who wants to hear about the stupid stupid way I'm playing Baldur's Gate 3?

I made it to Act 3 on my first (original character) playthrough like a week before Patch 5 came out, and after finding it absolutely unplayable (on the PS5) decided it was time to go ahead and start an origin character run for the funsies while waiting on the new patch to fix the Lag Hell. Naturally, I picked Gale. Since this was mostly just for fun/to hold me over until I could continue my other file, I decided it would be a nice time to see what happens if you just refuse to consume any magic items. Of course, if you are not playing as Gale and ignore his Orb Problem, he will apparently eventually leave your party, but what if you ARE Gale? I couldn't find an answer with a minimal amount of Googling SO

There are three stages to his Arcane Hunger, each of which give you increasingly debilitating debuffs: Arcane Hunger, Greater Arcane Hunger, and Severe Arcane Hunger. It seems the triggers for progressing to the next stage are the same as the triggers where he would start needing an item in my other file (i.e. that bridge next to the Blighted Village, entering the temple at the Goblin Camp, the Hag's Lair, etc.) which obviously makes sense. I figure with the amount of contingencies in this game for incredibly specific situations, surely there is some kind of unique dialog or fun cutscene that will play if I ignore the Arcane Hunger long enough and just play through the debuffs.

I played Act 1 completely normally, doing a lil quicksave every time I was about to Long Rest just in case the game gave me a cutscene of the big explosion upon waking up (I thought maybe it would be time-based, similar to the game over you get if Gale dies and you leave him for 3 days (? I think?) which does not seem to be the case). I made it through basically everything without anything odd happening besides the aforementioned debuffs. The Severe Arcane Hunger is where things get really sloggy, because Gale can only move at half speed.

I have been slowly trudging EVERYWHERE since the Goblin Camp.

I eventually started going out of my way to make sure I hit all the Arcane Hunger triggers I know about, to see what would happen, and the answer is nothing, aside from Gale occasionally reminding me that he's wracked with terrible pain.

So, surely, the game will certainly not let me into the Mountain Pass without SOMETHING happening, right?

WELL

That's surprising, but whatever, at least now I have the chance to see what happens if you go meet Elminster without having consumed any magic items,

Except

He wasn't there.

I went to the area in the Mountain Pass where the cutscene is supposed to start, and it just. Didn't happen. Nothing happened. I could walk right up to the entrance to the next area.

But SURELY, the game won't let me into the gotdamn Shadow-Cursed Lands without saying SOMETHING about the fact that the orb has been starving for several weeks at this point, right? The game isn't going to let me into Act Freaking 2 without at the very least giving me a game over to tell me I'm not allowed to do this and make me reload and actually feed this poor starving wizard, right?

RIGHT?

WELL

WELL

Here we are. I'm at the Last Light Inn, I'm at the Taco Bell, I'm at the combination Last Light Inn Taco Bell with a bag full of delicious Cheesy Gordita Magic Boots that I refuse to eat.

SO LIKE. How far does this go??? Am I gonna be able to infiltrate Moonrise Towers without ever speaking to Elminster? Am I gonna trudge all the way to Ketheric at half freaking speed and fight him with Disadvantage on everything?? Am I gonna make it all the way to goddang Baldur's Gate with a Netherese orb that is long overdue to explode???

Like I said, I did not find an answer on what happens if you do this on a Gale Origin playthrough, and at this point, I don't even want to, I just want to see how far I can take this.

I already know I'll have to do another normal Gale playthrough where I actually FEED HIM after this, because I'm sure I've missed out on a ton of dialogue and whatnot, especially from Tara who only ever has this to say when I speak with her in camp:

I am genuinely beginning to wonder if there is actually nothing in place to stop me from doing this. I am wondering what the dialogue options will look like when I get to the "Heart of the Absolute" where Gale would ordinarily want to blow himself up, if Elminster had ever shown up to tell him to do so. Maybe the devs just didn't bother, and figured that no one would be stupid and stubborn enough to play through the whole dang thing while so severely debuffed.

Joke's on them, Disadvantage means NOTHING to Magic Missile Machine Gale Dekarios.

[galacticwildfire]

Illicit Affairs | Obi-Wan Kenobi

Twelve

Obi-Wan Kenobi x Amidala!oc

Rhea Amidala meets Obi-Wan Kenobi when he and his master come to her younger sisters aid and he discovers the queen's sister was once a Jedi, expelled from the order for her unwillingness to forgo love and attachment. The two stranded together on Tatooine find common ground despite their differences, and above all a hope within the other for something greater than themselves.

He hopes for her to rejoin the order, while she hopes for him to leave, and both are left reeling from their illicit affair, until ten years later he is once again called to her sister's service and they are catapulted into each other's lives by a war that will set them on the same path of secrecy and tragedy.

Word count: 8.5k

Tags/warnings: sexual tension, angst, mentions of children and pregnancy, mentions of former substance abuse

A/N:

~

~

~

We return to the temple doing our worst to ignore that unbearable tension that leaves me wanting to repeat some very specific memories of that night together. Maker knows no one else has ever made me feel the things he did, emotionally and physically.

"So once we find Kamino in the archives we go and speak to the cloners," I say, trying to keep my mind on the mission at hand but it's hard when just the sight of him is enough to make me weak. "Try to find out who they're selling weapons to?"

"Precisely," he answers. "If it is the Separatists supporting these attempts they're contracting a bounty hunter to carry it out, and regardless of theories to get to the bottom of who exactly is ordering the attacks we need to get to the bounty hunter."

There's no point trying to get information from Dooku, he is too well guarded and inaccessible and he'd only lie, so we have to do this the long way. Even then, something in me doesn't want to admit it could be him, I don't want to believe my master would betray me so deeply. I can't.

"You know I once considered bounty hunting or at least something along those lines," I tell him and he blinks at me in surprise.

"Really?"

"When Padme's reign ended I found myself bored to death signing report after report and meeting with adviser after adviser. I wanted to be out in the field doing something," I say and he nods along smiling to himself knowingly. "Maker how I hate a desk job."

"I always did find it strange you found yourself in a life of public duty," he says and I realise he truly has kept tabs on me. "It never seemed to fit."

"It didn't," I laugh. "The palace still refers to my stint as Princess of Theed as a reign of terror."

"And now?" he asks me, able to sense easily I am not fulfilled by my life.

"Well, we're hunting a bounty hunter right now so I suppose I'll get a taste of it," I comment and he makes an amused sound as we enter the Jedi temple. "I miss fighting."

"Well my dear, I'm sure we're going to get one," he assures me as we wander into the archives  and begin looking through them for Kamino trying different spellings but nothing's coming up.

"That's odd," he says, continuing to type into the system with no avail.

"Quite odd," I agree and ask "Do you want me to get someone to check our archives on Naboo?"

"No it's alright, I'll call for assistance," he says and soon enough the Chief Librarian Jocasta comes over.

"Master Kenobi, and oh sweet Rhea," she remembers fondly and I'm certainly surprised anyone who knew me at fourteen would remember me as sweet. "I was very disappointed to hear the council voted against your return."

"Well so was I," I laugh awkwardly, Obi-Wan nodding in agreement, and tell her "I'm here on behalf of Naboo assisting Master Kenobi with some official business."

"We're looking for a planetary system called Kamino," he tells her. "It doesn't show up in the archive charts."

"Kamino," she ponders. "It's not a system I'm familiar with. Are you sure you have the right co-ordinates?"

"According to my information it should appear in this quadrant here," Obi-Wan says pointing at the hologram. "Just south of the Rishi Maze."

"I hate to say it, but it looks like the system you're searching for doesn't exist."

Obi-Wan and I share a look, feeling that something isn't right.

"Impossible," he says while I remember the ignorance of the Jedi well. "Perhaps the archives are incomplete."

"If an item does not appear in our records, it does not exist."

She leaves us to ponder this and we take one look at each other before each continuing to search for it and I make a transmission to the archives on Naboo.

"Hello this is General Amidala can I be put in contact with-"

"Rhea," a surprised voice says and my eyes widen realising it's my mother, having forgotten in between her busy life of being a house wife and trying to force me to be one she volunteers in the archives. It may be a harsh assessment but it's not without foundations. "Well, this is a surprise."

"Mom, hi," I say awkwardly, Obi-Wan looking over in equal surprise. "So I take it you're the volunteer archivist on duty then?"

"Yes honey I am," she says and pull my com away as I sigh, not wanting to speak with her right now. "Why are you calling?"

"I'm just on some business and was wondering if you could search something up for me."

"Oh what sort of business, for the senate?" she asks and I wonder if she's even aware of the attempt on Padme's life, from the news she'd have to be but I doubt Padme's told them anything more than the bare minimum, likely downplayed it as much as she can.

"Jedi business," I say putting her on speaker. "I'm working with the Jedi on this investigation for Padme."

"Oh how exciting," she says despite how absolutely morbid the situation is and I can't help but drag a hand over my face as the questions begin. "Are you working with that nice Jedi boy we met during the invasion?"

"I- yes," I stammer in surprise at that particular question, wondering how she can possibly still remember him, but he does have the habit of leaving an impression. "Obi-Wan is here."

"Hello," he chimes with a playful grin while she rattles on and I am quickly regretting this.

"He was a handsome boy, you should bring him home for dinner." Obi-Wan chuckles at that and playfully raises his eyebrows at me not knowing the half of it while I want to slam my head into the table. "It's past time you and your sister brought someone home to meet us."

"Yes Mom," I sigh while Obi-Wan has to stifle his laughter and he's lucky I can't look at him long enough without blushing to glare at him. "But look this is important, I need you to search for Kamino, it should be just south of the Rishi Maze."

There's a pause and some typing before she says "Yes, now what about it."

"Hello there," Obi-Wan says speaking up. "So it is there?"

"Of course it's there," she says and we share a confused look. "Is there a problem?"

"Not at all mom, thanks," I say, us realising something is quite wrong with the archives. "I'll be home for a visit soon hopefully."

"Lovely, now make sure you bring Obi-Wan," she says and I shake my head as I hang up.

"She knows my name," he says, impressed with himself. "I wasn't aware I made such an impression."

"Oh trust me she remembers any man I'm within six feet of. I can't talk to her without her trying to set me up with a husband," I tell him bitterly and explain. "My sister Sola has two kids now which kept her happy for a while but now she's onto me and Padme both about marrying and having children, much to her disappointment she hasn't been successful."

He tries to keep his voice light as he inquires "In all these years, you never found anyone to love?"

He's a sweet fool and so I tell him "My sweet Obi-Wan, you ruined all others for me."

Little did I know until I laid eyes on him again that my heart was always devoted entirely to him and he frowns, seeing for the first time that I'm right where he left me. Somehow time went on for everyone else, but not me. Still nineteen in my fantasy, in my dreams running back to him and begging him to leave with me. Running away together with no destination or plan.

I wonder if somehow he's still there too.

"But do you want it?" he asks me quietly. "Marriage, children?"

Now that's a question I've never truly asked myself, not when my family's tried to use it in an attempt to placate me, even if I've always known deep down I have a maternal instinct that's only grown stronger with the years, one I've tried to deny but it's become difficult. If I had refused Dooku's offer I may well have done what Sola did and have children on my own, I think I would have been happier for it. 

Still I lie.

"I don't know, I mean I'm nearly thirty, I should be thinking about it but-" He watches me quietly as I confess "Despite leaving the order to be free of the code, to be able to love, it seems I haven't."

But that's a lie.

I have loved, I've loved madly for a decade now. A love that left me knowing there would be no other because I could never imagine it with anyone but him.

And somehow I was just fine with that until now.

"You may as well rejoin the order," he remarks with a seriousness to his voice I don't expect and I try to laugh it off but he is being genuine.

"That didn't quite go to plan last time."

"You never know," he says, still with a glimmer of hope that breaks my heart. "You were Anakin's age last time, things are far different now and the council's seen it as well."

There's no arguing with that even if we both know it is utterly impossible and I look at him not knowing if I'll be able to walk away from him again. I'm not as strong as I was, not now I know the pain that awaits me in leaving him.

If I have learned anything in reuniting with him, it's that I will love him for the rest of my life no matter how hard I try not to.

And so I say something I never would have dreamed of before he came back into my life.

"Well, if you can convince them maybe I'll consider it," I say putting it into his hands with the comfort of knowing this time there is no hope for it, and he leans back in surprise, not daring to say anything that could make me change my mind as he takes the challenge on board.

"I'll see what I can do," he promises me, squeezing my hand and pain shoots through my heart knowing well it is just a dream. "Now, I want to take this issue with the archives to Master Yoda before we move on to Kamino."

I nod, finding it too strange for my liking as well and so we walk through the temple a reasonable distance apart until we come to find Yoda training a group of younglings and I can't help the smile it brings to my face and catch Obi-Wan watching me with a smile of his own.

Perhaps he knows the answer to his question better than I do.

"Younglings," Yoda says getting their attention. "Visitors we have."

"Hello Master Obi-Wan," they all say in sync and my smile widens.

"Hello," Obi-Wan smiles at the younglings. "I'm sorry to disturb you, Master."

"What help can I be Obi-Wan?" Yoda asks as some of the younglings wave to me, and Obi-Wans question does indeed play on my mind. Kids, I never truly let myself dream of them and instinct used that maternal instinct in fostering Padme and her handmaidens, but seeing Obi-Wan with them makes me feel a desire I've never let myself have before. 

"We're looking for a planet described to me by an old friend," he tells Yoda. "We know it exists in other archives but the system doesn't show it on our archive maps."

"Mmm, lost a planet Master Obi-Wan has, how embarrassing," Yoda says and I laugh with the kids as he instructs the blinds to be closed and for them to gather around. Obi-Wan activates the map reader. "Clear your minds and locate Obi-Wan's wayward planet we will."

Stars fill the room and while Obi-Wan points to where the planet should be they circle around him, and he's never looked so beautiful as he does in this moment, so gentle and soft spoken with stars surrounding him.

"It ought to be here, but it isn't," Obi-Wan says and I have to consciously remind myself to conceal my feelings in the force. "Although gravity is pulling all the stars in this area towards this spot."

"Hmm, gravity's silhouette remains," Yoda ponders. "But the star and all the planets disappeared they have. How can this be?"

"They would have had to have been purposefully removed from the archives," I say, unable to find another explanation. "They appear on Naboo's archives but not on the temples."

"Mmm, General Amidala is right, erased from the archive memory it was," Yoda says and instructs "Go to the centre of gravity's pull and find your planet you will." Yoda walks us out of the room as the younglings go back to what they were doing. "The data must have been erased."

"But Master Yoda, who could empty information from the archives?" Obi-Wan asks. "That's impossible isn't it?"

"Dangerous and disturbing this puzzle is," Yoda says, something in my stomach churning as if I have a piece of it already. "Only a Jedi could have erased those files, but who and why, harder to answer. Meditate on this I will."

"Master," I say suddenly and he and Obi-Wan turn to me. "Is there any way you can see when these files were erased? They could have been missing for days or years and to know a timeframe would help us greatly if it's related to this case."

"Suspicions you have," Yoda says as Obi-Wans brows draw together. "Share, please do."

"If the Separatists are involved it also stands to reason Count Dooku is involved," I tread carefully, trusting my gut. "If there is something occurring on Kamino he is involved with could he have erased it from the archives before he left the order to cover his tracks? I know it sounds absurd but does it not make sense?"

Whatever schemes his master has, he took Maul's place after his death and at that time he was still very much welcome in the temple. If he was working with the Sith as long as ten years ago...

Yoda makes a contemplative sound and Obi-Wan nods along in agreement but keeps a careful eye on me. "That- that could be possible. He only truly became estranged from the order after Master Qui-Gons death, but the confederation was not formed until several years ago so it could not possibly be related to the plot against the senator."

This is something bigger, something far more dangerous than any of us could conceive. Well, anything they could conceive. 

"Of course, I only wanted to be certain," I say, having also learned in the past years the benefit of downplaying my own confidence in my theories to make myself less of a target, to be overlooked. 

"Meditate on this I will," Yoda continues. "Something darker afoot I suspect."

He returns to the younglings and Obi-Wan and I head outside to his transport.

"I think you may be right about the archives," he tells me. "It seems to be the only explanation we can find."

"But for now we must leave it in Yoda's hands," I say, not wanting to linger on the subject of Dooku. "Perhaps we'll discover more on Kamino."

He looks at me carefully. "You used to have so much anger for the council, now you willingly trust Master Yoda, what happened?"

"I got older, and hopefully wiser," I say, looking at the temple, somehow having become the opposite of what Dooku wanted. He sought to tame me, berated me for my poor habits I'd developed with substances and lack of control, instilled in me a disciplined that's allowed me to think with a clearer mind so he could work with me, and in doing so I've been able to work through my issues. Mostly. "I slowly learned there is no point harbouring anger, I became too tired of it to let it consume me anymore. Yes there are moments where it's appropriate but it's bitterness that leads to the mind and soul becoming twisted." He tilts his head towards me in surprise. "I've made peace with them Obi-Wan, I see no point in holding onto anger, I let it go a long time ago now."

The last words are a lie, but as long as he believes them it doesn't matter, and he nods, quietly impressed and rests his hand on my shoulder. "I may yet give Anakin to you to teach."

I laugh as he walks me out to the hanger. "Oh no that little maverick is all yours, I'll keep Padme, we may argue over politics but we always find our middle ground."

"Yes well, I definitely wouldn't want to get caught in the middle after seeing you two before we left," he says looking at his ship, a single seater starfighter. "I do hope they are alright."

"As do I," I sigh and look at him knowing we have a long journey ahead of us but feel confident in a way I haven't in a long time with him by my side. "But we're taking my ship."

He's almost offended "What's wrong with mine?" He gestures to it as he tells me "It is one of the finest starfighters made and it isn't even on the market considering it was commissioned by the Order."

"Yes Obi, your ship is impressive," I assure him but point out the obvious "But do you want me sitting on your lap all the way to Kamino? I wouldn't mind but it would be awfully impractical."

He flushes at missing that obvious complication and I raise a teasing eyebrow.

"Alright," he agrees after a moment of consideration. "Your ship it is."

"And I'm flying," I grin as I lead him back towards Padme's apartment.

"Well you can't be anywhere as bad as Anakin," he remarks. "I trust knowing you it's armed."

"Very much so," I assure him. "Hopefully we won't need it but you never know."

"I'd say it's safest to assume we will," he says, both of us knowing it will inevitably end in a fight and he's fretting. "Does your ship have-"

"It has everything your precious starfighter does," I chuckle as he follows after me, too caught up in his safety protocols to notice he'd fallen behind. "It's a transport ship so it even has a bed."

I mean it innocently to ensure him it's well fitted with necessities but he has to clear his throat. "Perhaps we'd get into less trouble trapped in a cockpit we can't move in."

"We'd find a way," I tease but look back to see he's actually nervous. "I promise not to seduce you into my bed while we're on a mission."

"While we're on a mission?" he repeats, nothing being said about afterwards.

"Let's just try to make it to Kamino and back without taking our clothes off and call it a victory," I say and somehow we both know that might be considerably more difficult than we'd like to admit and go against my better judgement in saying "Then we'll see if we're wiser than we were ten years ago."

I'm glad for the physical distance between us as he says "I dare say wisdom does not come with age."

The look in his eyes is enough to make me want to cross that dangerous line we walk.

"You're right, it doesn't." My throat is tight now as I say "Come on, let's go back to Padme's apartment and get ready to travel to the outer rims."

"Yes," he says and clears his throat. "We best get on with the mission."

When we reach it we come to the startling realisation we are alone with complete privacy, something we have not yet had. That is enough that he quickly tries to find an excuse to be elsewhere while I prepare to leave.

"Do you mind if I freshen up?" he asks referring to the shower, knowing we'll be gone for days at least. 

"Of course," I answer, trying not to stammer at the thought of him naked in the next room and realise I am no better than a padawan. "You can use the one in my rooms, the ensuite's attached to the bedroom."

He gives me a thankful nod and heads inside, no doubt to take a cold shower which is something I certainly need as well.

"Fuck," I find myself cursing once the door to my bedroom closes and drag a hand over my face, a habit I seem to be picking up from him and look at my ship on the helipad, knowing this is going to be significantly harder than I had hoped it would be.

~

Obi-Wan

I shut the door to her bedroom behind me, needing a moment without her to balance myself, to regain my senses before confining myself in a ship with her for hours at the very least. I can't say this current predicament isn't my own fault, initiating as much as reciprocating any advances.

All I want is to take her into my arms, for her to feel the words I can't bring myself to say, to selfishly cross yet another line I swear I won't. I loved her then, I loved her recklessly but this is different. It's just as reckless if not more so but the depth of these feelings is beyond alarming. I don't just want to kiss her I want to be consumed by her which is not the jedi way. I want to feel the very things I've spent years fighting and I feel powerless to stop myself. I know if I hold onto her for too long I won't be able to let go. There's an adoration for her that is there no matter how badly I try not to act on my feelings, something I've done a horrible job of doing.

How many times can we possibly say we love each other without saying the words? I feel them in every glance, every touch, every smile. That love that I'd forced into memory is more alive than it ever was, penetrating every defence and leaving me with no clue how to fight it. She walked away all those years ago, she did the hard part before but now... now I still hold onto the dream of bringing her back despite how impossible it is because some stubborn part of me refuses to give up hope that it is possible despite what few pieces of sense I have left telling me otherwise.

I was prepared to deal with the feelings I had ten years ago, I was never prepared for the ones that have come now as quickly as they did before and so strong I could break under the weight of them. It makes me wonder what the point is in pretending otherwise when we both know so painfully well how we feel. It makes me wonder what more possible damage could we do to one another if I went and kissed her, if I took her by the waist and made love to her here and now. 

I should be better than this, better than just a man. I am a Jedi, but in her presence that is all I am, just a man hopelessly in love with a woman I know I shouldn't love. 

And so again I ask what more damage can I do if I give in to what it is we're both consumed by and allow myself just one more night with her before we're forced to part once again.

Except that's just it, it wouldn't be just one night.

I know exactly what damage it would do now I can finally see how deeply our affair wounded her. I'd truly hoped no matter how badly it hurt she would fall in love again, marry, have children. Have a life where she could be loved how she deserves to be. She tells me she doesn't want that, but I see how she smiles at the younglings. I see through every lie she tells, to herself, to the council, to me.

Something went terribly wrong before Padme's assassination attempt, something that has left her afraid, too ashamed to tell me the truth. But it was when she lied to the council I realised she has had training these past years. She can lie and tell them it's her own self discipline but we both know she has little of that at the best of times, or at least she used to. 

She has changed in a way I recognise as being sculpted, refined, and know it was not just her own self discipline that did it.

Padme knows something, I saw it when they were fighting, I saw the panic in Rhea's eyes and Padme's quick change of subject when she remembered I was listening. I'm half tempted to attempt to contact her on Naboo without Rhea knowing, but I know if I did that it would only cause a fight, it's the reason I haven't pressed or asked questions she doesn't want me asking. 

Against my better judgement and own personal hesitance I let my eyes skim about her room. She's both too afraid and too stubborn to reveal what she is hiding, but after watching her lie to the council I need to know if she's been putting herself in danger in order to train herself or to receive training from another. The answer is clear in my mind, but I struggle to believe it, struggle to believe that despite her ideological beliefs she would go so far. At least without coming to me first.

But when I find her cloak thrown into one of the corners smelling of something burnt I can't deny it, not as I pick it up and find the blaster holes and glass splinters and what I swear have to be lightsaber burns like those I saw on her back. I felt little darkness from her, but much shame, guilt. At first I thought it was about us, but when I watched her fighting with Padme it was clear her separatist sympathies were far more than just sympathies.

I don't want to believe it, I don't want to believe what is so blindingly obvious, yet how can't I after her panic at the mere mention of Count Dooku, but what leaves me uneasy is the thought it was more than a mere acquaintance turned sour. 

One thing is for certain, she's become a brilliant liar who is very capable of concealing things in the force. Unfortunately her eyes reveal everything and yet I can't help but become lost in them every time they meet and all I want is to help her, but if she has gotten herself into a mess as deep as I am beginning to suspect... our feelings for one another will soon be the least of our worries.

I drape the cloak over her chair before I go to shower, she knows I have my suspicions and perhaps this could just provoke her into revealing the truth to me, but something tells me she won't and this, the lies... it is perhaps the only thing holding me back from giving into her and perhaps that's what has stopped me from confronting her until this mission is complete.

So when the time comes and the truth is revealed she'll give me a reason to be able to walk away.

If such a thing is still possible.

~

Rhea

I stand in the kitchen, noticing the long time it takes for me to hear the shower start and know he suspects something, I can feel it. We both know damn well I'm hiding something, but neither of us are going to be the first to acknowledge it. Not until the mission is complete.

Even now as I stand here alone, the first time I can think clearly now he isn't in front of me, I don't know how much of Dooku's teachings were the Jedi's and how much were the Sith's. He became the sith lords apprentice after Maul, was involved with him even while Qui-Gon was still alive. An apprentice for an apprentice. That was four years before he summoned me to Serenno, towards the end I knew he'd been corrupted by darkness, by power, but nothing like this. I could never have known he was already apprenticing for a sith lord years before he took me as his own apprentice. A sith who made it clear to him that if I don't play the part he wants I have to die.

It didn't matter if I told Padme about their army or not, they knew the risk of it was enough that if she didn't come to their side she would have to die but she'd already been attacked by then. I don't understand. I want it to make sense but not how it is. I want to believe they were empty threats and someone from the Republic is responsible for this, but the deeper we go the darker it gets.

I look down at the jumpsuit I wear and know if we face this bounty hunter I'll want to be better prepared for combat and so I walk into my bedroom since the shower in the ensuite is still going and delve into my wardrobe for the clothes I wear while training, tight leggings and form fitting top. I take off my belt that holds my saber and blaster and put it on the table only to see in horror the cloak I wore on Serenno draped over it.

That was why Obi-Wan took so long, he found it. If he didn't walk out and confront me immediately it means he still wants me to know that he knows, but that it is my turn to be honest and I will be but I am not starting a fight when my sister's life is in danger, not when we have to be able to work together to get to the bottom of this.

Whatever that may be.

But still it jars me enough that in my hurry to change I don't notice the shower turning off until the door opens, nor did I notice his clothes folded on the same damn chair as the cloak so I'm standing there half dressed in my undergarments when he walks out with a towel around his waist and absolutely nothing else, both of us immediately apologising the second we realise.

"Shit sorry!" I exclaim and avert my eyes out of respect and panic, having until now succeeded in remaining the bare minimum of professional in trying to not get him naked but thankfully he's just as awkward at having caught me in a state of half dress although it's nowhere near as much as him.

"Sorry I-"

"It's nothing you haven't seen before," I say waving off his concerns with my eyes still shut and ramble "I- I promise I was not trying to get you into bed I just thought I better change into something I can fight in."

"Of course," he says, both of us caught standing there awkwardly and he stammers "That's- that's a sensible decision."

I nod and open my eyes to find both of us flushed and in a mutual state of defeat in our attempts to not end up in this situation.

"Well," I say, trying to laugh it off. "Seems we failed to get to kamino and back without taking our clothes off."

"To our credit we did make it half an hour," he says but the humour disappears when he sees the scars on my body, faint white lines now but obvious enough to the trained eye and I curse silently. For just a moment he averts his gaze as if to pretend he didn't see it, but his concern overrules all else.

The permanent reminders from Dooku of what happens when I am not fast enough in a duel, not sharp enough in my reflexes. He never went easy on me, and so if I made a mistake he didn't stop himself as any other master would, he let me take the hit and suffer the consequences of failure.

A lesson quickly learned, and still I never put two and two together despite his methods and know I won't be able to convince Obi-Wan I never knew when the evidence is right here on my body. His face is serious as he steps forward and I can't meet his eye as his fingers trail along the worst of the scars, one that runs from my waist up along my spine. My eyes flutter closed at the touch of him but the tone of his voice strips away any pleasure that could come with it.

"This is a lightsaber burn."

He states it as a fact, not making an accusation but it's there, I know it is.

"It is," I swallow, my eyes opening up to the sight of his bare chest and knowing I am in a very vulnerable position I choose not to elaborate. I could lie, attempt to gaslight him into believing I had them the last time we were together, but we both know there is no skirting around this.

He stays patiently silent until my eyes finally meet his and suddenly I can't look away as they bore into me and he knows exactly what he's doing as his fingers trail along my spine and it's all I can do to bite back whatever noise comes from the back of my throat and he says slowly "I'm going to ask you this once and only once, how did you get these scars?"

Immediately I jump to deflection, lying to those I love second nature by now "It's not important now-"

"Rhea," he says, not having the patience for deflection and uses the voice he does with Anakin. "I'm not going to ask you again."

It's not until now I know how deeply Dooku has corrupted me with all the years of lies, making me into a liar by forcing me to deceive those I love time and time again. 

"We have a mission to complete Obi-Wan," I remind him, knowing the truth would only hinder it. "We should be focusing on that and nothing else."

He nods slowly as he steps away and I can feel his hesitance, but his frustration gets the better of him as he remarks "It's incredible how dutiful you are when it's convenient for you."

And there it is.

I warn him "Don't talk to me about duty when I've devoted my life to it."

"Well then we have an understanding," he says, a coldness between us now and says words I know he's been holding back. "And yet when it comes to your duty to protect your sister you're still lying to protect yourself first."

And like that all common decency is off the table as I step closer to him and challenge "And how dutiful would you be if I took off my clothes right now? I'm guessing not very."

His face changes at those words knowing it's the truth and he warns me "Now we both know just how that would end."

"Is it any different to how this ends regardless?" I ask him and know I've hit a nerve in both of us. "I think it's too late to pretend we're walking away from this bloodless."

"Do you think when I took this mission I wasn't prepared for you to destroy my life once again?" he asks me and I'm the one standing there speechless as he quickly realises he's misspoken. "I didn't mean it like that-"

"Destroy your life?" I repeat in disbelief. "What about my life!" I stick a finger into his chest as I finally let my anger loose after all these years of cursing his name "Do you think you didn't destroy mine!" 

He breathes in deeply as he takes my hand and tries to de-escalate. "Can we do this when we're dressed?"

"No," I say harshly, not letting him back out now as I rip my hand away. "You started this not me." He moves away from me now, not wanting to engage and I yell "Ten years I've spent trying to put my life back together, you don't get to stand there and pretend you were the only one who was hurt!"

"Well I was the only one prepared to fight!" he argues back, hitting me where it hurts. "You're the one who walked away."

 I laugh dangerously at those words "Do you think it was easy? Do you think it didn't kill me to walk away? Walking away was the most selfless thing I've done in my entire bloody life!" My hands shake now as I yell "I walked away so you wouldn't have to because I wasn't going to let you destroy your life for me!" He can't meet my eye now. "So don't you dare stand there and demand to know the things I've done in trying to repair mine!"

"Has it occurred to you Rhea that maybe I want to help you!" he says harshly, but won't resort to raising his voice. "That I know you're lying to everyone including yourself and just want you to be honest with me of all people after what we've been through."

"I don't owe you the truth," I bite defensively. "We don't owe each other anything."

"You're right," he says as he marches back over to me. "We don't owe each other anything, our past is just that. In the past."

Except it isn't.

"Is it?" I question as he follows me with every step backwards I take, knowing I have him caught now. 

"Yes," he insists and I see that look in his eye as I suddenly find my back against a wall, his body dangerously close to mine. "It is."

But I can't help myself as I challenge "Really?"

His hand is beside my head, leaning over me as he repeats with little conviction "Really."

And so I tilt my chin up towards his and ask "Who's lying now?"

He takes the bait and I gasp out as I feel his hand on my waist, the other reaching for my face, holding it in place as he leans down, beard scratching my cheek as he breathes my name "Rhea."

I look up at him, chest heaving, and whatever he sees makes him let go of me before he can take this any further and in an act of desperation I reach for him, grabbing onto his muscled arm to pull him back to me and drop the act as I plead with him "I need you to trust me Obi." His eyes are conflicted as they meet mine "I will tell you everything when the time is right I swear, but until then I need you to trust me." 

"Rhea," he warns but his eyes betray him as I take his face in my hands and his breath catches in his throat, our bodies touching now as he holds me by the waist. 

"Trust me," I whisper, lips inches from his as I look up into his torn blue eyes. "Please."

I let him feel everything I do in that moment and his eyes fall shut, forehead falling against mine as he takes it in until finally he nods, placing his faith in me as he says "I trust you."

With those words my arms wrap around him and suddenly we're holding onto one another as for life itself and I bury my face in the crook of his neck, my hands grasping his bare back as he buries his fingers in my hair, clutching me to his bare body. The warmth of him is something I know I'll crave for years more, having almost forgotten it until now.

I press my lips to his collarbone and feel him sigh at the touch but as I press my eyes shut I feel tears in them. Not wanting this to end like before, not wanting to destroy each other again and so before this can go any further I pull back enough to press a chaste kiss to his cheek and tell him "I'll let you get dressed."

He opens his mouth as if to protest before his eyes meet mine and immediately he understands that pulling away is not by will, but mercy on us both. He nods in agreement and I force myself to let him go, picking up my shirt and walking out of the room before I can look back and kiss him in a way I can't undo.

I don't stop until I'm in the kitchen and pull the sleeveless shirt on, head in my hands as I lean on the bench and my eyes catch the bottle I used to poor us drinks after the last attack and feel the temptation for just a moment before cursing and walking away from it, my substance abuse being the one thing Dooku brutalised me for when I began my training and rightfully so. 

I fill cantinas with water and head to the ship, climbing inside and into the pilot's seat. It's a transport ship so it's spacious enough, and yet I know it is still too small for the two of us and our barely repressed emotions. Hell even the largest starship could never be large enough for us.

When Obi-Wan finally emerges he's dressed and his hair half dry, I open my mouth, not knowing if I should acknowledge what just happened but he speaks first, with a kind concern as he holds up my weapons belt that I'd forgotten in my haste to get out of that room.

"You might want this."

I give a pained smile as I take it. "Thank you."

He nods as he takes the co-pilots seat, eyes lingering on me before looking at the controls and asking "Are you ready for the coordinates?"

I nod and we set our course for Kamino.

~

Hours later we're travelling through the hyperspace lanes, having exhausted all topics of practical conversation regarding the mission our thoughts wander to just what Anakin and Padme are up to, using Anakin's own poorly concealed feelings to avoid our own.

"I'm sure he's behaving himself," I try to assure Obi-Wan. "I dare say Padme's grown tired of the obvious pining."

"Well, she'd certainly be fed up with his flirting," he guesses and criticises. "It is god awful too."

"It seems the master can't teach everything," I tease and quickly bring it back to Anakin before we tread down that carefully avoided path. "But I don't know, she always found it cute, and it's hardly like she allows that type of affection considering her station."

"So you aren't the only sister who terrifies any man who looks your way?" he says and I give a satisfied smile.

"Well I more so than her, she just prioritises her work above all else instead of deliberately brushing anyone off," I say, remembering that one senator, Rush Clovis. "And with Anakin she's too nice to be harsh, so either she'll let it keep going or try to let him down gently."

"I hope she lets him down as harshly as she has to considering he clearly doesn't have a lick of sense about him when it comes to your sister," he says and I roll my eyes at the blatant hypocrisy as he shakes his head. "If she gave him the chance he'd be that silly he'd be asking her to marry him."

I laugh, unable to imagine that. "That would be a sight, wouldn't it?"

"Don't even make me consider it," he groans, speaking frankly. "He doesn't even need a reason to break the code, he just does it, and if he did do something that stupid I don't even know what I could do aside from help him keep it secret."

I can understand trying to prevent Anakin from making the decisions he has but still, he's blinded to the fact they were not so different.

"We were prepared to keep a secret like that once too," I remind him gently, remembering it all too well not that either of us need the reminder.

His voice is quiet as he says "I know we were."

And the space is thick with tension again between us. At least we'd made it this far to Kamino without ending up here again.

I clear my throat "You know she's the one expecting me to do something as stupid as that now I'm alone with you."

He can't argue with her assessment but asks "How long has she known?"

From the way he says it I know immediately he's never breathed a word of us to another soul aside from answering the questions Anakin's had and is surprised I would.

"She knew something was going on at the time and after you left, well..." I don't need to finish and he nods, not needing me to explain the rest. "Like I said, she was afraid to tell me it was you who'd been assigned for a reason. She knew right from the start that you were my first love."

I know I wasn't his, but he was certainly mine. My first and only love.

The space between us becomes heavy and he looks over at me, a mere metre away at best in the cockpit, he looks at me conflicted before deciding to say "I- I'm sorry about what I said earlier."

I shake my head in dismissal "You don't need to-"

"I do," he says taking my hand in his. "I shouldn't have said what I did about you walking away. I- I know it hurt you as deeply as it hurt me. I know you've been in just as much pain as I have. It took me a long time to realise it and even now I don't want to believe I've been the cause of such pain."

"Obi-" I whisper but he's not finished. 

"When the shock passed I was thankful you walked away, because like you said, I would have walked away from the order if you'd let me." I swallow hard, him never having said those words so plainly before. Words that mean more than I love you ever could, words of a man willing to break from the order he had devoted himself to so he could be with me, the purest act of love he could commit. "You were strong enough to do what I couldn't in putting our duties first."

"And you've done incredible Obi," I tell him, squeezing his hand and his eyes soften. "I knew you would do right by Anakin and you have. I couldn't let you break that promise."

"I know," he says, both of us utterly vulnerable. "I know you did it because you cared for me too much to let me walk away from the order even if it meant breaking your own heart." He brings my hand to his lips and kisses it hard. "Still," he says, his voice gentle but desperate. "I want you to know Rhea that I really was prepared to fight for us."

I give him a sad smile. "I know, but I couldn't let you lose everything in that fight."

He returns my sad smile, tears in both our eyes. "You may not have been my first love darling, but maker knows not a day's gone by these past ten years that I haven't thought of you."

I blink at him in disbelief despite all we've confessed to one another. "Truly?"

"Truly," he says, letting me in that moment feel everything he does, the longing, the remorse, the devotion. "I meant what I said, that I'll never be able to look at a sunset without thinking of you, and those words are true to this day." With those words my composure breaks and tears slip down my cheek and he wipes them away, voice soft as he soothes me "No darling, don't cry."

"How can't I when you're here, telling me that you've been in as much agony as I have?" I reply and find myself confessing to him knowing there's only so much more destruction left for us to do to one another. "I loved you." Saying it so plainly brings pain to his eyes. "I loved you and I knew I could never find that love in anyone else. I didn't want to love anyone else. I still don't." I find myself wiping a tear from the corner of his eye and leave myself utterly vulnerable as I tell him. "What I said about marriage and kids, I lied, I-" 

His eyes search mine, realising there is something I haven't told him "Rhea?"

"For a moment I- I thought I was pregnant," I confide in him and watch his eyes change as he takes my face in his hand, tears still wetting my cheeks. "I wasn't, but for a moment..."

"Oh Rhea, darling," he whispers and brings his forehead to mine, trying to ease me before he confesses "For just a moment during those first few months of training Anakin when I believed I'd only fail him some selfish part of me hoped you'd come to me with the one duty more important than mine to him." I realise what he's saying and search his eyes, seeing the same scared boy I loved who was so uncertain of himself, of his capability to fulfil his masters wishes. "So I had a reason to leave that was more honourable than for the forbidden sin of having fallen in love."

"Obi-Wan," I breathe and we both know there is no escaping this unscathed as my heart breaks once again and he kisses away my tears as he did all those years ago until I whisper. "I don't want to let you go again."

"Neither do I darling," he promises me, kissing my palm as he asks "How is it a love so brief has endured so unwaveringly all these years?"

"I don't know," I say quietly, terrified as I ask him "What are we going to do?"

His brows draw together in contemplation, torn between every piece of sense he has and what he feels, unable to come to any conclusion except for one "I don't know, but it seems we're the ones we should be worrying about instead of Anakin and Padme."

"I think you're right," I chuckle tearfully and I can't help but look at his lips after trying so hard these past days not to. "Obi-Wan I-"

"I know," he says and I close my eyes as his lips skim over my cheek. "I know darling."

"Please," I whisper, not knowing what it is I'm asking for but he knows as his lips move down towards mine. "Obi-"

"Rhea," he breathes and every second is torturous as his lips brush against mine only for us to be torn apart by the blaring alarm sounding from the radar and he curses "Blast!"

Quickly I slam the alarm off and watch as Obi-Wan looks from the radar to what both of us were too occupied to notice. Kamino.

"There it is, right where it's supposed to be," he says breathlessly. "Our missing planet." 

He looks at our hands, torn between discipline and desire, his resolve momentarily lapsing as he leans forward without warning and kisses the corner of my mouth, quickly moving his lips to my forehead before I can kiss him back and we linger there for just a moment in the silence before he forces himself to pull away so I can descend into the atmosphere of Kamino.

Sitting there beside him with the ghost of his lips on mine I know that the dangerous line we've walked, we've certainly crossed it now.

[oferwood]

The dynamics between the Welsh and the English had always been strained, while some of the Welsh, like William, had no issue; William’s father and grandfather had always despised them. It was a generation-long, decades-long issue that could hardly be resolved, but to William’s father, he would be disappointed in seeing the man his son had become. “People in my village talk about Welsh independence, often saying that we’d be better off without English rule. Calling me English is as big of an insult as he could think of.” And while William agreed, he never thought he was smart enough to voice an opinion.

“You have avoided your own loss, Mr Thorpe,” William teased; an attempt to deflect was as good as any. The way the man described his adventures was something many would trade everything they had for. To experience a foreign land, immerse yourself in it, so it was something most only dreamed of. “You have been to, how many?” William asked, not really waiting for an answer. “Yet you don't have any stories that stick out?” He found it hard to believe; either the young lord-to-be had too many adventures to recall, or perhaps he barely got off the boat.

An idea sparked in William’s mind, but the only question that remained was how far he would go. Miss Juliet had all but declared him an enemy, and his position in this world was far more precarious than hers, as was the fortune of being born to the right family. “Lady Whistledown is a great source of knowledge, I’ve found, particularly earlier editions. I believe she comments on your family; maybe it would be best to read up, as to be prepared, of course.”

When the conversation shifted to his own expertise, William smiled. Apart from being with the one you loved, there was no greater pleasure than talking about one’s passions in life. “With a tame horse and a good tutor, you’ll be an expert in no time.” Well, not an expert, but the man would be in a better position. Nobles and the rich didn’t need to ride a horse, not when a carriage filled with their own comforts sufficed.

“Back-hun-ol yesty-nig?” Aware he had completely butchered the pronunciation, Tobias’ cheeks reddened at his sorry attempt at copying Williams words as if that would make him understand what they meant when in fact it had confused him even more. “Ah, selfish.” That garnered a nod and some understanding since he had been accused of that but wordlessly so. “Is being English so bad?” There was a lot of ignorance on that matter as he did not know the way some felt about his country. Not that Tobias felt any patriotic duty to it, it was more of a innocent ignorance on the matter.

Whenever someone was confronted by their sacrifice or felt it seemed that they felt that all over again. “So, you lost those things or maybe it could be a misplacement, and you can find them again?” Easy enough to say to someone else but if someone were to say the same to him then he knew he would dismiss it was a carefree ease. “More adventures than I can count,” he beamed with the memory. “Some tales more entertaining than others but for the most part, it was experiencing different countries with little adventure and more as tourist wanting to stay longer than permitted. It was always fun, though.” None of it he would change.

“Perhaps you have…” Tobias tease. “Maybe that start of one but do not worry, I’ll save the credit for myself to avoid extra casualties.” Any trouble and consequences he would more than happily claim it solely for himself. “How long do you suppose it would take? I rode a little before I left and I was a fairly good rider but it has been a long time away from it. Something you could help with?”

[lavendermin]

would you mind | childe

pairing | childe/reader

word count | 1.9k

genre | developing relationship, light smut, complicated feelings

If ever there was a force greater than the ancient winds of old Mondstadt, it was that harbinger from Snezhnaya. All it took was one afternoon during your shift for him to gain an interest in you—a fascination maybe.

The Fatui weren’t known for a good reputation in Liyue, and it only made you a bit uneasy knowing his high ranking—a cautious approach to a stranger in higher power. You couldn’t deny him and you didn’t dare show disrespect for subtle fear of consequence.

Rumors of people getting blackmailed—or worse— from getting tangled with the Fatui spread like wildfire in the harbor. Though they were baseless accusations, they didn’t stop from simmering in the back of your mind. The ‘what if’ was a damning point your mind made. Rumors didn’t come from nowhere around these parts.

Though Childe carried a sense of danger with him, there was something about him that kept your nerves manageable. The persona he carried was very impressionable, maybe even a little irritating at times. He was a persistent one.

“Mind if I join you for lunch?”

“Sir… I work here.” He knew this, too, yet he always arrived at the tea house with the same line. Still, you were quick to tend to him.

Childe hummed, eyes grinning with him as he happily plopped down at the table you swiftly offered him. “I’ll take that as an opportunity. The usual, please.”

Just treat him like a normal patron, was a personal mantra to get you through a shift at the tea house.

You were just lucky he was well-mannered. It made dealing with him easier. There was something about him that irked you, but at the end of the day he was polite and never forced a conversation if you were busy serving others.

“You don’t seem to talk much these days,” Childe notes as he swirls the remnants of his tea in its cup. It’s nearing closing time and you keep glancing over at the clock as he makes no move to leave. He sighs dramatically, “I miss our conversations.”

It’s playful, knowing full-well you hardly ever speak to avoid trouble from your boss. Maybe you would blame it on the exhaustion of a long shift, maybe put blame on lack of sleep. The comment, however, still makes you break seriousness and you erupt in an abrupt fit of laughter you quickly fight to quiet down. Luckily you’re closing by yourself tonight.

The sound is melodic, surprising Childe as a grin grows on his face. Though your back is turned as your shoulders shake from suppressed laughter, he can see the embarrassed red at the tips of your ears.

Oh, so you did find his company entertaining.

Your back straightens, and when you turn around you’re back to keeping him at a distance with an air of seriousness. Nothing more than work and patrons.

Childe leaves after wishing you a safe trip home and thanks for the wonderful service, as usual. The briskness of the cool night air keeps his mind intrigued once more with the mystery that surrounds you. Duty in Liyue was getting quite boring, and he decided to indulge in figuring you out.

“Would you mind if I joined you for a stroll?”

The familiar ginger hair strode up matching your pace. In the bustling crowd of the harbor, his presence sticks out like the cries of seagulls overhead. Maybe it’s your paranoia, but you swear people make an effort to move away from your little bubble he now infiltrated.

Still, he’s a harbinger.

So you nod quietly.

“I’m just running errands. It’s quite boring.” The way his eyes linger on yours for a second longer has you averting your gaze. The smile he wears… since when did it make your chest squeeze?

“I’m sure not as boring as some of the tasks I’m given,” he chuckles.

“Paperwork, I’m sure,” you guess idly. The vague smile he throws you has something about it that sends chills running down your spine.

“Something like that.”

The chuckle you give him is a little nervous. You aren’t sure what tasks he gets but you aren’t sure you’re willing to find out.

“Feel free to join me if you’d like, then.”

And for the rest of the day he patiently strolls around with you around the harbor through idle chatter. From dock to dock he follows, offering to pay the entire sum of anything on your errands list. The unlimited financial power he holds both terrifies and amazes you.

From then on, his company became frequent on your errand runs. Many shop keepers at first got anxious with a Fatui agent escorting you around, but his bright charisma won them over eventually. Business was business in the end, and his tendency to let the shopkeeper ‘keep the change’ won the favor of many.

You forgot when exactly you stopped trying to shake him off altogether. Perhaps you got too complacent since there was little you could do. Some days you even enjoyed his company. Childe was a good listener on days when you were a little more talkative, and he would always answer with utmost sincerity.

Yes, you looked forward to his little greeting and chance encounters on the harbor. Part of you hated the fact that you got so comfortable with him but the louder part of you was conflicted with bubbling feelings for the harbinger. For months on end you kept those feelings suppressed in the deepest parts of your heart.

And then the storm season hit.

“Mind some company?”

The water dripped down your face, soaked clothes clinging to your form as you stood under a tree near the outskirts of the harbor. Your eyes were wide, doe-like as you peered up at the familiar voice.

“Oh, sure.” Your eyes drift back to stare absentmindedly at the puddles rippling in the rain. “I was just waiting for the rain to let up a bit so I can make it back home.”

Childe hums, his usual charismatic smile bright on his face. It’s a little dangerous, and makes your heart race. Addicting.

“You know, at this rate you’ll get sick by the time you get home. I say we just make a run for it,” he offers with a devilish grin.

The frown you give him only further amuses him. “Run? Through the pouring rain?”

“Got any better ideas?”

You sigh, the sound of pattering rain filling the silence as you weigh your options.

“Fine. Okay.”

He grins, and you surrender to letting the harbinger have his way in the rain. Through the streets you both run, footsteps cutting through puddles and crowds of people with umbrellas. It’s thrilling and you can’t help but laugh at how fun running through the rain is. You both look like lovers that got caught in an unfortunate circumstance, and your chest wells up with feelings as you watch Childe pull you through crowds and street vendors.

The storm is raging outside, rain pattering on windows that rattle softly from the wind. It’s soaked you both to the bone by the time you arrive at your little flat. The room is quiet save for the rain that relentlessly knocks on the windows.

The quiet sound of panting fills the room as you both catch your breath from running through the rain, towels draped over your heads as you try to warm up.

“It’s pretty rough out there,” Childe notes, looking out the window. “Any longer out there and the wind might have picked you up before I did.”

It’s wordless—the way you join him by the window to look out at a grey city. You give a silent hum as you finish towel-drying your hair. The expression you wear is serious, aloof as you’re unreadable in your thoughts.

Childe is the first to speak, his voice soft and sincere—perhaps a little disappointed at your return to keeping him at arm’s length. “I’ll get going then. Glad you could make it home sa—“

It comes as a surprise—the sudden kiss you give him. Your small hands pull him down by his shirt collar to meet your lips in a rushed kiss. He’s quick to return the gesture, his lips curved in a smirk against yours.

You pull away breathless, face a little flushed. The frown you wear is adorable, a pout almost. “I hate that I like you.”

Childe is at your lips again, a breathy chuckle rumbling through his chest as he cages you against the wall. “And here I was thinking I’d never woo you, what with you not liking the Fatui and all.”

You cut him off with another kiss to hide the heat rising to your face. “Stop talking.”

He laughs wholeheartedly, his body against yours as you melt against his lips. It’s needy and rough. The sounds of your soft pants and little gasps are washed away by the rumbling thunder outside.

And through the storm, you spend the night. Childe feels like he’s won—gained one step closer to knowing more about you. He wanted to know all your faces, uncover all the mysteries and unknowns you held. And through the night, he learned of your sensitivities, the little noises you made, and the gestures that made your heart leap.

He had you around his finger. But perhaps the same could be said about him.

Early morning comes, the light barely coming through the window to illuminate the dark room. From under a mess of sheets you stir, body sore. Your fingers graze over the blooming markings on your chest and neck.

Beside you Childe sleeps soundly, his broad back dusted in light freckles and scratch marks. The way he hugs the pillow makes his sleeping face look almost kid-like in innocence. You’d never think he was a war machine for an archon.

You push the sinking feeling away, and brush some hair out of his eyes. The featherlight kiss you place atop his head stirs him from his sleep.

“Mornin’. Here I thought you would be gone by now,” he mumbles groggily. With his tousled hair and sleepy smile, you find it incredibly difficult to feel annoyed.

“I live here.”

He chuckles at this, grabbing you by the waist and pulling you against him. You scramble to pull the blanket over your bare body and though he finds it amusing, he doesn’t comment on your shyness. “Would you mind if I stayed the morning, then? The rain isn’t letting up anytime soon.”

“That sounds like an awfully obvious lie,” you retort.

It’s hard to ignore the hardness that presses against your abdomen. The lack of shame on his content face irks you. Still, you don’t deny the way your body heats up once more.

“Your face is just so cute when you’re begging,” Childe teases, pressing kisses up your neck.

“Childe, sto—haah.”

In a swift motion, he has you straddling him. You can feel his hardness press against your ass, sending a shudder of anticipation through your body. The ache in your thighs tries to protest against the lust-driven haze clouding your judgement.

Childe’s hands are already massaging the soft flesh at your hips, hands waiting for permission. “What do you say, sweetheart? Another round if you can keep up?”

“Y–You have duties to tend to, don’t you?” you bring up meekly, eyes shut tight as he bites a sweet spot on your neck that hitches your breath. Slowly, your mind is losing itself, drunk on his attention again.

With a smirk against your skin, he answers simply, “They won’t mind my whereabouts in this weather.”

[writingtoforgetreality]

New World Order - TFATWS Rewrite Chapter One (Bucky Barnes x Reader)

[Marvel-Masterlist], [TFATWS Rewrite-Masterlist]

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Summary: You were an Avenger. That was how the world viewed you. Nobody else knew about your past & it was for the better. After all, you had Sam. You had Bucky. That had to be enough. At least for now.

Words: 6,214

Warnings: language, sarcasm, expect some sort of slow burn, there are hints already, this is a Bucky fic, which means that it'll focus on his scenes more, spoilers for TFATWS, (Y/E/C) = your eye color

If you like my work & wanna support me: a coffee would be highly appreciated ❤

You were no superhero. At least, you would never say you were one. Your past was filled with actions you regretted. None of it was your fault. It was not your decision to be the child of the leader of a HYDRA base. It was not your decision to grow up like a warrior. Fighting. Killing.

Your father was the bad guy. You knew that now. As a child, you did not see through his facade. How could you? He was your dad. Someone who was supposed to love you endlessly. Those years had shaped you. Into the person you were today.

Deep down, you wished there was a way to make you forget. Forget about your past. Forget about the pain. Forget about it all. Hell, you were a laboratory experiment. Those powers did not come from nowhere. No. They came from tons of needles, pumping a toxic serum into you veins. You should not even be alive anymore. Not by what now flowed through your body. Apparently, it was for your own good. That was how your dad put it. Absolute bullshit. Growing up isolated from the world, being trained to fight, to kill, daily. Your own good my ass. If it did one thing, then it ruined your damn life.

But at least you had powers, right? Blue flames you could control. Those blue flames that were hotter than anything else in this world. It took an awful lot of time to fully have control. Truthfully, you hated that part of you with every fiber of your being. It had been the cause of one too many deaths. You had been the cause. But weakness was not in your nature. If you did not show strength you would be a disappointment. Something you really did not want to be.

Bucky was the reason you got out of this life. He was the one to rescue you out of this hell hole. He was the one to show you an entirely different part of this world. And for that, you could never thank him enough. If it were not for Bucky, you would have gone insane ages ago. Who knew if you were still here today?

The Avengers were aware of your past. Of you being a part of HYDRA back in the days. Yet, you had never elaborated this any further. If there was one thing you were good at, it was keeping things to yourself. No need to burden others with your struggles. And you did struggle. Every single day. Because your mind was filled with memories. Memories you had tried to burn. Memories you wanted to erase. Memories of you being the bad guy. Just like your dad had been.

Your life changed when you were introduced to the Avengers. They did not trust you. Not right away. But during the fight with Thanos, the one after the Blip, you proved yourself to be worthy of their trust. Especially Steve. He had been there for you. When everyone else failed to believe in you. He was gone now. And it hurt like hell. Giving up was never an option. And the universe did not plan on giving you a break anytime soon. For now, you had to bury your feelings as deep as possible. Your focus should solely be on the new threats of this world. Threats, that seemed to increase daily.

“Bucky is an asshole.” you were on the phone with Sam & the fact that the super soldier had been ignoring him for a while did not leave a good feeling inside his chest.

“What a revelation.” sarcastic comments were part of your life. It was your way of coping with everything. Frankly, it worked. More or less. “Give him some time.”

“More time? No.” sighing loudly. “I have other things to focus on.” he was referring to the mission he was about to perform.

“You sure you’ll be fine on your own?” it was not like you did not believe in his abilities. Just, life had not been the same ever since billions of people came back.

“When have I ever not been?” you could think of a few times but Sam ended the call before you even had the chance to answer. Typical.

Luckily, Sam usually told you about his missions. And you were proud of him. You really were. The situation you found yourself in? With Bucky & him? Well, it was everything but good. Bucky called you. You called Sam. Sam called you. You called Bucky. A circle you kept alive. And it sucked to be their only way of communication. For now, though, both of them were too stubborn to change anything about it.

“Enjoying the Tunisian sun I hope?” whenever Sam went on a mission, you had him call you after it. Simply because he knew you worried.

“You know it.” in the far background you could hear him working on something.

“Is everyone alright? That trainee of yours? What’s his name again?”

“Torres.” he sighed, frustrated by your question. You had asked him about a million times & apparently, you still had no clue. Truth was, you just liked messing with him. “Redwing is hurt.”

“Naaaw, poor baby.” giggling slightly. That man cared more for a piece of tech than he should.

“Shut up.” okay, better not mess with Wilson if it came to Redwing. Got it.

“When are you coming back?” your voice turned serious again. Having him gone for so long did not stick right with you. Obviously, you knew he was doing it for the greater good. But still. “I swear to all the Gods, if you say when we’re done here…” mumbling quietly but loud enough for him to hear.

“When we’re finished here.” a chuckle could be heard from his side. By the way it sounded, you assumed Torres was laughing as well. Rolling your eyes at his antics. He could be such a child sometimes.

“Oh, fuck off, Wilson.”

“Hey, language!” Sam had fun. Yeah, you were the one cracking jokes all of the time but he could deliver, too.

“Okay, you know what? Bye. Text me when you’re back.” now, it was you who did not give him enough time to respond. After all, he would have clapped back with another snarky remark & you were not in the mood for it. At all.

“Steve represented the best in all of us. Courageous, righteous, hopeful. And he mastered posing stoically.” everyone chuckled at Sam’s description. Of him. Steve. Rhodey was standing right next to you. In that suit of his. The one that made him look way more approachable than you. No need for people to approach you. They did not know who you were before. And they sure as hell did not need to. It would turn things complicated. Humans did not like complicated. You did not like it. “The world has been forever changed. A few months ago, billions of people reappeared after five years away, sending the world into turmoil. We need new heroes. Ones suited for the times we’re in. Symbols are nothing without the women & men that give them meaning. And this thing…” he paused briefly, let out a short chuckle. The shield. “I don’t know if there’s ever been a greater symbol. But it’s more about the man who propped it up, & he’s gone. So, today we honor Steve’s legacy. But also, we look to the future. So, thank you, Captain America. But this belongs to you.” the crowd erupted into cheers. Applause was filling the room & you felt out of place. What was he doing? When Sam asked you to join him here today, he left out the fact that he wanted to give away the shield. The shield Steve had trusted him enough to own. And the people surrounding you? They…celebrated him for it? This entire speech was proof enough that Wilson was worthy of this job. So why the hell did he make that decision? Watching the shield being put into the showcase, you could hardly hold in the tears that formed at the corners of your (Y/E/C) eyes. Rhodey nudged you, sensing that something was wrong. Head hanging low, you ignored him, walking out of the room as fast as possible. If you stayed here any longer, Sam would have bruises for sure. Bruises caused by you. You would not risk that. Though, he kind of deserved it.

“Where’s (Y/N)?” Sam asked Rhodey when he finished with the press. You had told him you would wait here for him. There was no sign of you.

“Left a while ago.”

“What do you mean “Left a while ago.”? Did she say where she was heading?” why did you decide to leave? Had anything happened while he held his speech? All Rhodey could do was shrug. An explanation was not given by you. And he knew better than to ask.

“Take a walk?” Rhodey suggested, completely unaware to your weird behavior. The two of you were not that close. So he did not know you like Sam did. You were an adult, after all. If you wanted to go somewhere without asking someone first, then you were allowed to do that.

Disappointment was flooding through your body. Friends told each other stuff like that, right? So why did he keep it a secret that he planned on giving away the shield. With that action, he broke Steve’s trust & you were livid. If only Steve were here right now. You missed him. So much. Next time Sam met you, you could not promise anything. Because anger was all you felt. Anger & disappointment. Grief. But that one you could keep to yourself. At least for the time being. Shit. Bucky. One hundred percent did he watch Sam giving away the shield. Oh, he would be filled with hatred. Compared to that, you were only a small threat. Bucky was the one Wilson should keep an eye on. Well, he had been trying to get a hold of him. So far, without luck.

A gunshot blasting woke Bucky up from another night invaded by nightmares. His changed hair did not put his demons at bay. His look was different but there were some things he could never get rid of. His past. The past he dreaded as much as you did. Probably what you two had in common. Being part of HYDRA & all. His breathing was irregular & there was no way in hell he could go back to sleep. It was in the middle of the night & he hated himself for relying on someone else. But he would go insane if he did not call another person right now. If he did not call you. The only one who seemed to understand what he was going through. The only one who never judged him because of his nightmares. The only one who made him feel like he was a good person. Not the killer he once had been. When HYDRA controlled him. Back, when he was called “The Winter Soldier”. Would he ever move on from that? Grabbing his old phone, he did not overthink too long & dialed your number. One, he knew by heart. Because he had called you so many times. It stuck in his head.

“Buck? Is everything alright?” concern was present in your voice. Usually, when you got a call in the middle of the night, it was him. And you were fine with it. If he trusted you enough to help him with his demons, than you were more than happy to come to his aid. No matter the time.

“I-I…it’s just, ugh, I-“ still shaken up from his nightmare, you did not need him to finish his sentence. You had been in this exact situation so many times. You knew what he needed. Your presence. Your voice. Your comfort. You.

“I’ll be there in a few.” assuring him, you were already grabbing the stuff you needed & walked out of your apartment. Only one destination in mind. Him. “Do you need me to stay on the phone?” it was a simple question. A stupid one, too. Usually, he would not say a word until you were with him. But it felt right to ask him what he wanted you to do. Needed you to do. When he did not answer for a few moments, you guessed he only nodded, not realizing that you could not see his motions. Yet, he did not hang up. Neither did you. Your breathing was enough for him. At least until you were in his apartment.

Knocking softly, as to not wake his neighbors, the door opened almost immediately after. Squeaking ever so slightly. Taking in his appearance, you could tell that it had been a bad nightmare. No, not a nightmare. A memory. You knew that because it was the reason you woke up most nights as well. If it were not for him feeling miserable, you would have drooled by the sight of him. No shirt. Hair sticking around so beautifully. Eyes you could lose yourself in. But it was not the right timing. Besides, Bucky & you were just friends. That was it. Just friends. Though, you would lie if you said that you did not feel butterflies whenever he shot you one of his charming smiles. Whenever his body brushed against yours on accident. Yes, he did have that effect on you. Hell, that was not what he needed right now. Your feelings could be dealt with later on. Bucky was all who mattered now. There was no conversation. No words exchanged. It was enough for him if you were with him. A sign that he was not alone. That he still had you. Even after everything. Even after calling you, night after night, disturbing your own rest. Not that you got much to begin with but he did not need to know that. It had always been a mystery to him. Why you stuck around still. Though you had assured him thousands of times that you were in this for good. If he needed you, you were only one call away. And he appreciated you for it. More than he would ever like to admit. Friends. You were friends.

“So, Mr. Barnes, are you still having nightmares?” another session with Dr. Raynor. Another dreaded session. It was stupid to Bucky. But there was no way out of this. He had to. Seconds of silence went by before she spoke up again. “James, I asked you a question. Are you still having nightmares?” what kind of question was that? A stupid one. That was for sure.

“No.” simple, short. Sufficient. Not for his doctor, though.

“We’ve been doing this long enough that I can tell when you’re lying. Well, you seem a little off today. Did something happen recently?”

“No.” what an answer to move this session forward. Clearly, he was not in the mood to talk today. Not even you were able to get his mind off of things. Though, you definitely made his night easier.

“You’re a civilian now. With your history, the government needs to know that you’re not gonna…” her hand motioned stabbing. Awful action but who were you to judge? Bucky nodded with that look on his face that showed how completely done he was with this situation. Yet, she kept going. “It’s a condition of your pardon. So, tell me about your most recent nightmare.”

“I didn’t have a nightmare.” well, it was worth a try. After taking a deep breath, she grabbed the pencil, ready to start writing into that notebook of hers again. “Oh, come on. Really? You’re gonna do the notebook thing? Why? It’s passive aggressive.” looked like the two of them were going back to the roots.

“You don’t talk. I write.” Bucky sighed at that. He knew he would not get out of this.

“Okay. Okay. I crossed a name off the list of my amends yesterday. Don’t worry. I used all your three rules. Senator Atwood. She was a HYDRA pawn for years. Helped her get into office when I was the Winter Soldier. And after HYDRA disbanded, she continued to abuse the power I gave her.”

“So, rule number one, you can’t do anything illegal.”

“All I did was give some intel to the aide to convict her. And I wasn’t involved in anything else.”

“Rule number two?”

“What was rule number two?” his gaze drifting off, showing he thought about it deeply. How ironic.

“Nobody gets hurt. It’s a big one.”

“Then why isn’t it rule number one?” he did have a point there. No room left for arguing about that. “I didn’t hurt anybody. I promise.”

“And what about rule number three?” Bucky’s mouth opened, yet, nothing came out. “The whole point of making amends is to fulfil rule number three.”

“You know, you’re a cynic, Doc. Of course, I completed rule number three. I am James Bucky Barnes & you’re part of my efforts to make amends.” words followed by that smile of his. That smile everyone could tell was fake. Almost creepy. But efforts, right? It was all about the efforts.

“So, you did it all right, but it didn’t help with the nightmares.”

“Well, like I said, I didn’t have any.” Bucky Barnes, everyone. Still trying to fool his doctor.

“Look, one day, you’re gonna have to open up & understand that some people really do want to help you & that they can be trusted. People like (Y/N).” the mention of your name made his eyes snap up.

“I trust more people than her.” it sounded more like he tried to convince himself more than anyone else.

“Yeah? Give me your phone.” an order. Grabbing it out of his pocket to hand it over. A short look was enough. “You don’t have ten phone numbers on this thing. Oh, & you’ve been ignoring the texts from Sam. Look, you gotta nurture friendships. I am the only person you have called all week. That is so sad…Oh, that’s not right. You called (Y/N) last night. Anything you wanna tell me about that?” closing the flip phone, she threw it over to Bucky which he caught with ease.

“What? Do I need to justify calling a friend?” chuckling & shaking his head slightly, he brushed his hands over his thighs.

“If you call that friend at 3 am, then yes. Because you should sleep at that time. Except if you had a nightmare which you claimed that you didn’t.”

“We just talked. That’s all.” he thought that brushing it off as if it were nothing was enough to get her to shut up. Hell, he had brought you up during his sessions way too many times. After all, he still wanted the situation between you guys to be subtle.

“You’re alone.”

“A minute ago, you said I had (Y/N).” he tried arguing but his attempts failed.

“You’re a hundred years old. You have no history, no family…” right, pouring salt in the wounds. That usually worked.

“Are you lashing out at me, Doc? Because that’s really unprofessional, you know? When did that start? Yelling at your clients?” she seemed to have enough & again went for the little book next to her. “Oh, the notebook. That’s great.” sighing deeply, he braced himself to take her more seriously. “All right, give me a break. I’m trying, okay? This isn’t…This is new for me. I didn’t have a moment to deal with anything, you know? I had a little…calm in Wakanda. And other than that, I just went from one fight to another for 90 years.”

“So, now that you’ve stopped fighting, what do you want?” he had an answer in mind right away. Never ever would he say it out loud. It took him a second to reply. Because what he was about to say came in union with his first thought.

“Peace.”

“That is utter bullshit.” what a nice way to bad talk his answer. Maybe she was expecting something else from him. Maybe she knew the answer just as much as he did. The real answer.

“You’re a terrible shrink.”

“I was an excellent soldier, so I saw a lot of dead bodies, & I know how that can shut you down. And if you are alone…”

“Which I’m not because I have (Y/N).”

“…that is the quietest, most personal hell. And, James, it is very hard to escape. Look, I know that you have been through a lot, but you’ve got your mind back, you are being pardoned. I mean, these are good things. You’re free.”

“To do what?”

Wednesday. Bucky usually went to Izzy. Today, he asked you to join him & Yori. Why he wanted you there with them? No clue. But it was not often he asked you to go somewhere with him so you agreed on meeting them there.

“Take a look.” Yori was a cute, old man. Reading his newspaper like a good citizen. Bucky had yet to give you an explanation as to why you were here right now. But for now, you just sat next to him, quietly observing your surroundings. “Nobody made it past 90 this week.” it was funny, to see Bucky trying his hardest to sound interested. Like he understood.

“So young. Such a shame.” his words made you scoff. Apparently, once you hit the 100 mark, you turn into a sarcastic piece. If you were not one before. If you ever made it to 100? Only the Gods knew what would come after that. Most people called you a sarcastic asshole now. Could that be topped?

“You guys didn’t order the usual, huh? Feeling a little adventurous?” the woman behind the counter directed her words at the three of you.

“Um, actually, I’ve never been here before, so…” you chuckled to avoid the awkwardness that would sure as hell build if you kept quiet now.

“You should ask her out.” Yori leaned over to Bucky & you almost choked on your food at his words. Bucky asking her out? Her? Yeah, she was beautiful & all. But her? Really? Seemed like that Yori dude did not know Bucky as well as he claimed to. You, on the other hand, were aware that nothing good would come out if it. Besides, they would not even make a nice couple. Shit, were you jealous? Oh no. Glancing over at the man next to you, his face showed just how much he despised this idea. At least something.

“Mm-mmm…” shaking his head frantically, he shot you a quick look but before his eyes locked onto yours, your gaze fell down to your plate. Slightly embarrassed. Scared that, if he looked at you, he would notice something behind your look. Something more. Something, that you wanted to keep hidden. For everyone’s sake.

“He would like to take you out on a date.” oh fuck off, Yori. You had nothing against this man but he was pushing your buttons. Could he not see that Bucky was incredibly uncomfortable with the idea of going on a date? With her? “Maybe to bingo or a night of pinochle.” hiding your laugh behind one of your hands, you could not believe that he was serious. Bucky & bingo? Well, it was for old people so you guessed it fit quite well. Not with her, though. Oh no, you really were jealous.

“I’m really sorry about him.” Bucky apologized for his friend’s behavior. Yes, you were sorry for him, too.

“Why are you sorry?” of course, now the woman was flirting with him. It got better & better. Taking a deep breath, you tried to keep your emotions at bay. You could not lash out in the middle of this restaurant, after all. Even though you were this close to doing just that. Deep breaths, you got this. “I’m game.” sure she was.

“Wow.” really? Bucky was impressed? By this? Oh come on, why would he settle for less when he could have so, so much more. But it was not your decision. He was not yours. You did not own him. Neither did you make the decisions for him.

“Tomorrow night, then?” Yori leaned over the counter.

“Tomorrow night’s great.” she replied with a bright smile.

“Hey, I just remembered something.” you spoke up all of a sudden. Bucky’s eyes met yours now & he saw that you were uncomfortable. Though, he could not pinpoint why. “Um, I-I need to go. See you, Buck. Bye guys.” sprinting out of the restaurant, you hoped nobody would follow you. Not in the mood to deal with anyone right now. All you wanted was to be alone right now. Your mind the only one keeping you company. But your mind was not really the kindest to you. Not in this particular moment. So what? Bucky had a date. You knew that would happen sooner or later. He was a good looking man. More importantly, you just wanted him to be happy. Genuinely happy.

Fucking great. Who could you talk to? You still were not done being mad at Sam. And now you were mad at Bucky for something he did not even do. He sort of did. He could have said no. If he really did not want to, he could have said no. Bucky was enough of a man to speak his mind, you knew that. Maybe he did want to go on a date with her. What was her name again? Not that you cared too much. But still. Blinking away the tears that had formed at the corners of your eyes, you kept on walking. Without a real destination. You were stupid. Friends. Why could you not accept this? Usually, you would call Steve in such a situation. Or even Tony. But it was too late now. They were not here anymore. You had to deal with that sooner or later. Whether you liked it or not. Contemplating calling Sam, you eyed your phone carefully. One more button. But nope. The anger was bigger than the need to talk to someone. Stubborn you. Wilson could make you feel better. But you would most likely end up yelling at him. And you knew you would regret your words later on. So might as well stay silent for the time being. Until you calmed down enough.

It was 10 pm. Date time for Bucky. That same restaurant. Being the gentleman that we was, he even brought her flowers. Like it used to be back in the 40s.

“Well, if that’s not the most adorably old-fashioned thing anyone’s ever done.” Bucky felt lost. In her company. “Grab a seat, I’ll be done in a few.”

“Okay.” he could up & leave. It would not be too late. All he knew was that it felt wrong.

“So, have you dated much since half the fish in the sea came back?”

“Not really. I, um…tried the whole online dating thing. (Y/N), the girl who was here with me yesterday, she set up a profile for me because I didn’t understand a single thing.” laughing at the memory, he thought back to when he called you to ask you for a favor. How you laughed at him for wanting to try this whole bullshit. “It’s pretty crazy. A lot of weird pictures.”

“What kind of weird?”

“I mean, tiger photos? Half the time I don’t even know what I’m looking at. It’s…It’s a lot. When I showed (Y/N), she simply said that this was what I signed up for.”

“You sound like my dad.” definitely something a man did not want to hear while on a date. On the other hand, he did not even want this to be a date. “Wait. How old are you?

“A hundred & six.” only he could make it sound so casually. Like it was the most normal thing on this planet. Both laughed at his words. Simply because it was so absurd.

“What’s up with your big gloves?” a sensitive topic she just touched.

“I, um, have, uh…poor circulation.” sure thing.

“Hmm…Hey, what is it about this (Y/N) girl & you?” his eyes widened at her question. What was she getting at?

“She’s my friend. Why?” his dumbfounded expression made her chuckle.

“A friend, huh?”

“Um, yeah.”

“You sure about that?” an eyebrow raised. A questioning stare was sent his way.

“Why does everyone think I don’t have friends?” throwing his head back in frustration, he let out a long sigh.

“It’s not that.” she stopped briefly, thinking about her next words carefully. “Just, you guys seem pretty close.”

“Well, we’ve known each other for years.” he reasoned, gesturing with his hands to bring his point across.

“Yeah? And the looks you’re shooting each other when the other one’s not looking?”

“What are you talking about?”

“You two aren’t really subtle about this, you know?” she wiped the counter & did not even look at Bucky. He, on the other hand, started sweating.

“Subtle about what?”

“Oh, come on. Who are you kidding? I don’t even know why you’re here right now.”

“Because Yori set you & me up on a date.”

“And why did you agree?” she crossed her arms over her chest, waiting for an explanation from the man in front of her.

“I-I don’t know.” he responded truthfully. Because he thought it to be polite? Because Yori was the one who suggested it? Honestly, he was not sure.

“That’s what I thought. Look, you’re a nice guy & all but…just, listen to your heart from time to time. It’s late. You should head out. See you.” she turned around & walked further into the restaurant. Leaving Bucky alone with his thoughts. It was clear what she intended. Did not mean that it made this entire situation any easier. Bucky left without another word. Fresh air would help him think straight.

Your phone rang & you sighed when you checked who decided to annoy you. Bucky. Of course. But wait. Should he not be on his date right now? Did something go wrong? Not that you wanted it to but if you were entirely honest, you would not be mad about it either.

“Hi Buck. What’s up?”

“I need your help with something.” there was no hesitation in his voice. Just him being straight forward.

“Please don’t tell me you need help on how to get the girl.” it was your way to lighten the mood. You did that because you could tell that he was incredibly serious. Usually, this was never a good sign.

“Can I send you an address? Can you meet me there as soon as possible?” his voice was low, deep.

“Um, sure thing. But just to set things clear…I won’t join in on your fun, Buck. That’s between you & her.” again, sarcasm was your way of coping with emotions. Though, it was not the right time to use it right now. His next words were proof enough. You should not mess with him. Not in this moment.

“Can you be serious for a second?” he raised his voice a little. It was not much but it was enough to leave you confused. Bucky was not the person to yell at you. Especially not like this.

“I’m sorry…Um, yeah, tell me where & I’ll get there as fast as I can.” gulping down, you waited for him to give you more information.

Arriving at an unfamiliar building, you could make out Bucky’s form in front of it. Why would he want to meet you here? Where was his date?

“Buck?” your voice barely above a whisper. The night sky only illuminated by the moon that shone brightly. Providing just a tiny bit of light. Enough, to let you notice your surroundings.

“Thanks for coming.” you could tell that he was stressed, tough, you were not sure why.

“Is everything alright? Because I swear, if that woman did anyth-“

“No, she didn’t. Promise.” his warm smile was encouraging enough. It was clear that he was not lying to you. “Just…didn’t work out. But that’s not why you’re here.”

“Okay?”

“My last nightmare. Do you remember?” nodding for him to continue. “How I killed that innocent man?”

“It wasn’t you, Buck. You were being controlled.” touching his shoulder softly, squeezing it to reassure him.

“Whatever…That guy, it was Yori’s son. I want to, need to, apologize. Even though the apology comes way too late.” you nodded at him, your eyes meeting his briefly. Now you knew why he called you. He did not want to do this alone. No. He wanted you by his side. To support him through it. Entering the building together, Bucky led you to the apartment Yori lived in. His hand raised to knock on the door. Surprisingly, he did not waste any time. He wanted to get this over with. Understandingly so. No words were exchanged. You being here, with him, that was more than enough.

“Hey, what are you doing here?” Yori opened the door, his face showed confusion by the appearance of you two. “How was the date?” you could not help but roll your eyes at the old man in front of you. Looking at Bucky, you were worried when you saw him having an internal conversation with himself. Mouth opening & closing again. No words coming out. Risking a look inside the apartment, you noticed a small picture frame with who you assumed to be his son. The one Bucky killed. No. The one the Winter Soldier killed.

“It was…It was good.” Bucky mumbled.

“Bullshit.” you followed after. None of them heard you, though. Luckily.

“Forgot I owed you for lunch.” Bucky handed him money. If you were not mistaken, this was not a form of apologizing. He had a hard time, though, that much was obvious. Afterwards, Bucky turned around & walked away without another word. Which left you alone with a confused looking Yori.

“I’m sorry for the disturbance, sir. Have a good night.” plastering on the sweetest smile you could offer, you followed Bucky outside. Jogging to keep up with the super soldier.

Back outside, you saw Bucky holding his little notebook in his hands. You knew about it. Because you were the only person he talked to when it came to his therapy sessions. A look over his shoulder could tell that his eyes were trained on the name being circled. His body was tense. That was not what he planned.

“It’s okay, Bucky.” your hand stroked over his lower back in a comforting way. Your forehead rested against his shoulder, hoping, that it would ease him a little. You could feel him calm down at your touch. “Give yourself some time.” you mumbled quietly, knowing he could hear you clearly due to the calm night. You just hoped that he would not beat himself up too much. Not more than he already did.

You were back in your own apartment. Still no words from Sam. But that was nothing new. Sometimes, he would go radio silent for a few days but after that, he would always check in with you. Maybe he figured that you were mad at him. For giving away the shield & all. And he probably was busy with work. The work he did with Torres. If he needed your help, he would call you for sure. Your TV got your attention again. Something told you to watch closely. So you did.

“Unrest, in the wake of recent events, has left us vulnerable. Every day Americans feel it. While we love heroes who put their lives on the line to defend Earth, we also need a hero to defend this country. We need a real person who embodies America’s greatest values. We need someone to inspire us again, someone who can be a symbol for all of us. So, on behalf of the Department of Defense & our Commander-in-Chief, it is with great honor that we announce here today that the United States of America has a new hero. Join me in welcoming your new Captain America.” the crowd cheered loudly & someone walked through the door. You could not believe what was happening. Please, this had to be a bad dream. When would you wake up form this hell? A man, wearing his suit, holding his shield, greeted the people. Looking at your hands, you could see small, blue sparks forming at the tips of your fingers. That only ever happened when you had no control over your emotions. Right now, you were everything but in control. Of course he had to wink at the camera like the sick person he was.

“Oh, you’ve got to be kidding me…” breathing out lowly, you put your head into your hands, completely ignoring the sparks there. You did not feel them anyway. If you ever met this son of a bitch it would not end well for him. And the next time you would meet Wilson? Fingers crossed he could deal with your angry & disappointed self. Because you were seething.

~to be continued~

Next Chapter

Published (04/02/2021) by Cathy

Tags: @taina-eny​, @tanyaherondale​, @cool-ultra-nerd​, @toribentleyva, @buckyandlokirunmylife​, @annadier​, @howlongtillidie​, @mizz-kraziii, @theetherealbloom​, @millenniumloki​, @marvelbros-oneshots​, @ajbwasnthere, @bilesxbilinskixlahey​, @mystictimetravelcolor​, @dbrees256​, @sxpxrnxturxl, @dreamydreamerwriting​, @dolllstyles​, @angelicastiel​, @prettysbliss, @infinitelyforgotten​, @sweetserendipity65​, @lilystilinskicullen​, @partypoisonsblog, @btdsprayberry, @sarai-ibn-la-ahad​, @deamus-liv​, @simplybarnes​, @sethcohenluvr (let me know if you wanna be tagged <3)

[cannibalvillains]

Wiping some stray specks of blood from his arm, Sukuna took his dear time as he made his way up to where the curse user resided. The carnage down below gradually grew smaller, insignificant like grains of sand, with every step he took towards the sky. Truth to be told, he'd initially been impressed by the world that had presented itself to him when witnessing it all through the brat's eyes. However, once he'd learnt to take control and tested the boundaries of this new humanity, he was disappointed to find it crumbled just as easily as the old one. The only difference laid in the spectacle. Greater buildings, bigger crowds, more noise. Nevertheless it still felt like he was missing something.

Like a greeting, a gust of wind blew over the rooftop when Sukuna reached his destination. He had to squint to make out the other man standing closer by the edge. His ever-present grin always carried a sense that he was up to something sinister. What exactly had never quite mattered to the king of curses, as long as it had allowed his own freedom. And so Sukuna answered with an uncommitted stare, neither smiling nor quite frowning as he crossed his arms and angled his head to take him in.

" Not bored. Just taking a break. Trying to see what they'll do and if they find a way to make it more interesting. " Perhaps, they could even impress him. However Sukuna doubted it as much as he hoped for it.

He paid no mind to the photographic device that had captured Kenjaku's attention, instead approaching the edge to watch the spectacle from a distance. The city below them laid obscured by smoke, unravelled by the people underneath moving about like ants. The noises of the slaughter mixed with desperate pleas for help echoed from the small machine to paint an all too familiar image for the king. He didn't need to watch the video to know what happened. "I prefer the humans of my time. These ones break too easily and their fighting capabilities leave much to be desired. They have forgotten too much over the centuries."

[  TOP OF THE WORLD  ] ( either with Kenjaku and Sukuna; or with Geto and Gojo, your pick )

SETTINGS WITH POTENTIAL : accepting

[  TOP OF THE WORLD  ]:     one of the muses finds the other on the roof-top in the middle of the night. neither of them want to sleep, and so they sit together for the remainder of the night until the sun comes up, content to sit and talk and exist with each other.

From the top floor of a high-rise skyscraper, one might be tricked to believe the expanse of buildings they see to be endless. It's that age old sense of awe bestowed upon humanity by things of gargantuan sizes; a reminiscence that beckons the cunning mind to peer beyond and wonder — is it a clue to set a compass for their expectations? Does it mean that if a beast born of their collective duhka manifests in this world, it will be a creature that towers far above those buildings men pour their sweat and tears into building, all for the sake of a fantasy to touch the sky? A creature so large it will force the perspective of their own puny size in the grand scheme of things?

Humorous. When even Gods possess the humility to understand the confines of one's own limits, there are no boundaries to the human hubris. Humans are but the spritz of paint from a brush painting into the celestial — and it is they who hold the handle.

The proverbial rope to herd humanity into its inevitable evolution has been tossed; lambs ripe and ready for the slaughter. And Kenjaku can witness it all from the comfort of a small screen - that is miniscule in size, yet so, so important.

Happenstance had brought them to the rooftop. But it was a place that inspired one to stay, especially with the gorgeous sight of hoisted barries and the smell of blood and war heavy in the air. Reminders of times past. Donning the monk's kasaya with dark locks swept with each passing breeze, Kenjaku's frame fit perfectly into a scene unearthed from forbidden history books.

The Golden Age is nay.

And speaking of which-- someone's residuals tickled their nose and their head snapped around sharply. A frown replaces the everlasting smile momentarily as the body of one Suguru Geto reacts strongly to the King's presence; shivers, gritting teeth, fists inadvertedly clenching all until Sukuna's aura has well settled around the mastermind's own. Violet eyes creep over a heaved shoulder as Kenjaku reprograms mundane reflexes with the same grace as strings dance around the puppeteer's fingers.

The unpleasant look melts from their visage, giving way to that everlasting smirk.

❝ I will admit, you are the last one I would expect to find up here at a time like this. Don't tell me you're bored already, Sukuna. ❞

With that, they turn back to the phone at hand. There's a pause, filled only by distant echoes of souls being ripped from their shell. And then, another, uglier sound; like nails on a chalkboard, the sorcerer gargles a laugh.

❝ Call me sentimental— but I will miss the humans of this age. They might be a pitiful bunch, but they are very reliable. ❞ No matter what comes next, he doubts it's going to be as pliant. Unless absorbed. Or sliced and diced. Or— Kenjaku cuts his own thread of thought before it unravels into endless possibilities. The unbothered look returns upon their features when lifting the phone screen to where their unexpected company may witness the gruesome footage.

So ready to be at each other's throats given the slightest opportunity. Faintly, Kenjaku recalls Jogo's rants about humankind being a blight on earth; but they never really cared about the moral aspect of it. Creation has no morality attached to it.

[wannabe-fic-writer]

Natasha Romanoff x Reader : Let’s Get Away

Summary: It’s due time for Natasha to take a break.

Genre: Fluff

Request: Yes / No

Word Count: 3,899

“ty mne ne doveryayesh’?” - “do you trust me?”

* * * * * *

The other side of the bed is cold when you wake up, void of the body that had been keeping you warm at night.

Sleepy eyes scan the room and even though you know she’s gone again, you still feel disappointed to find her combat suit missing from the closet. 

Knowing that your worry for her isn’t going to allow you to go back to sleep, you toss the covers away from your body and trudge out of bed. After brushing your teeth, you grab the first aid kit and head to the common room.

Two and a half cups of tea and a partially burnt bagel later, you hear the tell tale sound of Natasha coming home. 

Not only does FRIDAY announce her arrival, Natasha herself lets out a pain induced groan.

Having known your fiancé for more than ten years, you can even hear the difference in her footsteps, the way her feet shuffle across the floor instead of her usually confident strut. She’s exhausted, bruised and beaten, but not in the least bit ready to admit to needing a break. 

It’s dead silent between the two of you. 

Natasha was really hoping you’d still be asleep, most nights she’d been able to slip back into bed without you noticing, until you saw the fresh scars and bruises in the morning. 

Tonight is different though, and she can tell. In the way you quietly rise from the couch and walk over to her, the way you sigh when taking her hand in yours and seeing her newly bruised knuckles, the way you aren’t able to look her in the eyes even after you’ve pulled her to sit down and start to tend to her wounds.

Every touch is soft, some could say overly delicate. You touch her as if one wrong brush of the alcohol soaked cotton will hurt her or break her completely. You know it won’t, she’s the Black Widow for Christ sake, she’s had far worse injuries than these and her pain tolerance is high, that doesn’t stop you from being gentle with her.

Even though the atmosphere is tense, Natasha can’t help but to remember that this is exactly how you were with her when you’d begun to develop feelings for her. 

Being a medic at S.H.I.E.L.D since before she was recruited meant you weren’t new to dealing with the injuries of the agents that came through. When she was brought to you the first time, with a gunshot wound to her thigh, you were the perfect picture of calm, cool, and collected. While you weren’t aggressive or rough with her, there was a noticeable difference in her first visit and how you would later treat her.

Despite her incredible skill, Natasha ended up taking a lot of trips to the med bay, all of which lead to you two getting closer. Which in turn lead to the development of your feelings for each other. Each one, she felt you becoming softer with her, she started to see the worry in your eyes when she would come in. There was something about the way you treated her as if she wasn’t invincible that drew her to you, she was always the badass Black Widow to majority of the people she knew, it was a breath of fresh air to have someone treat her like she’s just Natasha. 

Natasha sighs heavily,“ I’m sorry.” She mumbles, but you hear it in the quiet of the compound. 

For a moment she thinks you’re pissed at her, what with the lack of a quick reply. In reality you’re just focusing on pulling the tiny shard of glass out of her knuckle, cleaning, and wrapping it. 

Once you’re done, you set everything you’d used to the side, opting out of painkillers since it won’t do much to her enhanced dna anyway. 

“What exactly are you apologizing for?” You ask softly, finally looking up into her eyes. It surprises you to see the amount of guilt in her eyes that you do. A frown forms on your face. 

“I-” she swallows, breathing heavily,“ I don’t mean to worry you so much.” That guilt in her eyes mixes with a troubled expression and it breaks your heart. 

“Then why keep going out there?” You turn to face her completely, legs folding as you play with your fingers.“ If you keep it up the NYPD are gonna be out of jobs.” You try to tease, hoping a little joke will take that look off her face.

God you hate seeing anything other than a smile on her face.

Natasha shakes her head and the tears that spring into her eyes after her prolonged silence takes your breath away.“ I don’t know what I am outside of being an Avenger,” she confesses. When a tear escapes, you reach up and swipe it away, leaving your thumb there to caress her cheek.“ There’s always been a mission, a threat, a purpose.”

Listening to the way she says it, you know what she actually means to say. She had a purpose. The fact that the Avengers dismantling has left her feeling so lost wasn’t something you knew. It affected her hugely. Tony and Clint both stepping away to be with their families, Thor switching over to the Guardians, Bruce going back to do whatever he had been doing after Thanos’ snap, and Steve choosing to go back to be with Peggy only to return and pass the Captain America mantle to Sam.

If you were in Natasha’s position there’s no way you wouldn’t be affected by that. Everyone was moving on, everyone seemed to have their purpose outside of the Avengers, everyone left her behind. 

You take a deep breath, tilting your head to catch her eyes,“ not knowing what to do is hard,” you see her shoulders drop at your words, as if she’s relieved to hear that you understand.“ But it doesn’t mean you don’t know who you are.”

That makes her freeze, eyebrows furrowing in confusion. Her head tilts to draw her gaze from the floor to your face.

“Nat, honey, you were an Avenger. And I know what that means to you. But being an Avenger was only part of who you are.” A gentle smile forms on your lips at just the thought of how extraordinary this woman is.“ You’re a loyal friend, an incredible aunt, a hero,” she chuckles softly at that,“ and you are the most amazing fiancé.”

Soft green eyes bore into yours, tears brimming her eyes again but for a different reason all together.“ I love you so much.” She says, turning to press a kiss to your palm. 

Pulling your hand away, you open your arms to her and she happily obliges to your invitation for a cuddle. A grunt of pain escapes her when she twists to lay between your legs, her body freezing up for a second, before she nearly slumps into you. 

Her back presses into your front, your arms circling her waist. You press a soft, lingering kiss to her temple and she laces her fingers with yours, taking in a deep calming breath. 

“The last few years have been hectic, and even before all of that, it seemed like we never slowed down,” you tighten your hold on her,“ but right now, we don’t have those kinds of threats looming over our heads.”

“You’re saying I should stop.” 

With a frown, you shake your head and lean over to look her in the eye,“ no, god no. I told you, a hero is part of who you are. What kind of fiancé would I be if I told you to stop doing what you were meant to do? Not a very good one right?” She answers with a nod and a chuckle.“ nor would I be a good fiancé if I let you keep going without telling you to take a break.”

As if her body picks up on that phrase alone, a long, loud, yawn leaves her lips. You can’t help but smile at how cute she looks, her nose all scrunched, eyes shut. The second the yawn ends she blinks back the tired tears and snuggles closer. 

She says something but it’s muffled by another yawn and by the time that one ends, her eyes are shut, and she’s fast asleep. 

* * * * * *

When Natasha wakes up in the morning, she’s in bed and she’s alone. 

The emptiness of the space beside her does something to her heart and she can’t help but wonder if you got this feeling whenever you woke up and she was gone. 

Some of that guilt from last night creeps back up and she groans, turning to bury her face into your pillow. While your scent usually calms her down, now it only serves in reminding her of just how dumb she feels. 

You’ve always been the most understanding and loving with her, more than anyone she’s known. Just like last night proved, you’ve always known that saving people even though it put her in danger was what she was meant to do. You knew how important it was for her to clean her ledger, you even understood when she went to Russia for months to shut down the Red Room and make amends with her family. 

The second she came back you didn’t have to ask if she’d done what she set out to do, you could just tell and it translated through the following days. You took even greater care of her just to ensure that she was truly okay both physically and emotionally.

After all of that, after all you’ve done for her, she’s still making you worry by throwing herself into danger she doesn’t have to be involved in. Somehow you even understand that.

This time she groans, squeezing the pillow as frustrated tears pool in her eyes. 

“That does not sound like someone who’s having a good morning.” Your teasing voice hits Natasha’s ears and through her frustration she can’t help but roll her eyes. Then moving to sit up, resting her back against the headboard.“ Wh-what’s wrong? Does something hurt?”

You rush to her side, hands and eyes instantly starting to roam her body for any signs of injury worse than what you found last night. 

“I-I’m fine, physically.” That just makes your frown deepen.“ I just realized I’m the worst fiancé in the world.”

Figuring this has to do with last night, you climb over her legs and sit beside her.“ As your fiancé I think I’m the one to determine whether that’s true or not.” She raises an eyebrow at you and you know to drop all the teasing.“ Okay okay. Why do you feel that you’re the worst?”

“Aren’t you tired of me?” She turns to look at you directly.“ I’ve always been in danger and you’ve understood and now I’ve been blatantly throwing myself head first into danger and yet you still understand?”

You cock your head to the side with love in your eyes.“ I’m far from tired of you Romanoff. Am I fond of the idea of you being beaten up and shot at, no. But I love you and I know you’re more than capable of handling yourself. And I’m going to worry about you because that comes with loving you. You could work with puppies, or babies, or I don’t know what a safe job is, either way, I’d still worry about you.”

A sigh falls from her lips,“ that makes me feel a little better.”

“I know how you can make it up to me.” Hopeful eyes look back at you.“ Get your cute little ass out of bed, get ready, and meet me out front.” You smack a kiss to her cheek before hopping out of bed, leaving Natasha to watch you nearly bounce away in excitement. 

Curiosity is the main driving force in Natasha’s actions. She does in fact get out of bed, taking a much needed hot shower afterwards and changing into a pair black stretch pants and one of your sweatshirts.

The last thing she’s expecting when she meets you outside is to find you leaning against a very new looking silver sports car. It being a convertible allows her to see the red leather interior. 

“Is that my sweater?” You ask, brows pinched together with a finger pointed at her chest. 

“We’re getting married medovyy, what's yours is mine.” A sweet smile hits her lips. You weren’t going to ask her to change anyway cause you love seeing her in your clothes, but had you been considering it, that smile would’ve done you in.

Humming, you shake your head,“ that aside. Let’s go.” You reach back to grab the handle and pull the door open for your fiancé. 

“Go where?” She takes a hesitant step forward.

You smirk, reaching up to cup her cheek and ghost your lips over hers,“ ty mne ne doveryayesh'?” You whisper.

Dammit she’s a sucker for you speaking Russian. Had she known when you started learning in your first years of dating that it would become a weakness, she would’ve stopped you. You already had a hold on her, that just made it tighter.

It’s why she nods, seemingly in a trance. Only easing into the seat after you’ve given her a proper kiss.

The door shuts after her and you round the car, jumping over the door and into the driver’s seat. You look over at her,“ I’ve always wanted to do that.” You say giddily, before clicking your seatbelt into place.

With a shake of her head, she puts her seatbelt on as well, and gets comfortable in her seat.

“The final destination is a surprise, but you can know that we’re going to that little diner you love so much in Greenwich.”

She can’t help but smile at you. She couldn’t get more lucky if she tried. 

“One last thing,” you reach across her lap to the glove compartment, pulling it open and retrieving two pairs of sunglasses. Setting them in your lap, you lean towards her and reach up, fingers deftly combing the braid from her hair, and then you slip the glasses onto her face. 

Winking at her, you slip your own pair on and start the car. It purrs to life and right before you pull away from the compound, you flick the radio on. 

The quiet that settles over the two of you is full of contentment. Music plays softly as Natasha holds your free hand in hers, fingers occasionally playing with the engagement ring on your finger. 

That feeling remains as you open the door for her and escort her into the diner. You let her slide into the booth first and she takes your hand and tugs you down into the seat beside her. 

An amused smile plays on your lips that makes the redhead give you a look, her eyebrow raised at you.“ What?” She asks.

“Nothing I just-” you chuckle shortly,“ I remember a time when you’d only let me sit across from you. I could hold your hand but sitting next to you, that was a no. Wasn’t until a year after we made things official that you let me sit next to you. I couldn’t help but wonder if that meant I was special.”

Her finger presses into the side of your jaw and she gently turns your head to face her,“ you are special. Especially to me.” And then she kisses you so sweetly you think it might give you a cavity. 

Your breakfast date passes with flirty remarks, quietly spoken affections, and soft kisses between bites of food and sips of tea and coffee. After which you settle the bill and head back out to the convertible. 

The next destination is unknown to Natasha but, unlike usual, she finds herself excited about the unknown. It’s an odd feeling but she welcomes it, letting herself feel free of worrying about what’s next. And you revel in seeing her like that. 

Sending an occasional glance in her direction just to watch her long red tresses flow with the wind, to smile softly at the way she shuts her eyes and let’s the breeze caress her skin, and to chuckle when her hand raises to create a wave against the wind. 

More than ten years you’ve known her, majority of which you’ve had the privilege of calling her yours. If there’s one thing being with her has taught you, through every obstacle you two faced together be it arguing about if tea was better than coffee to the many many life threatening missions she’s been on, it’s that moments like these were precious. 

There’s never any way of telling when the next world or universe threatening event will occur, if it’ll be the one to take Natasha away from you, so it became abundantly important that you get these chances to bask in being with her. 

Your thoughts lead you to subconsciously taking her hand in yours, raising it to press your lips against the back.

Natasha smiles. She swears your lips feel like rose petals. Nothing compares to your kisses. 

“I love you,” you say blissfully. 

Nothing except that.

“I love you too,” she squeezes your hand. 

The look of excitement that lights across your face makes her eyebrows raise. It’s not the same as the usual look you get when hearing her say those words, your expression is usually softer. Which is why she follows your line of sight when you look away from her.

Her eyes are met with the view of a beautiful lake house and she quickly snaps her gaze back to you. 

“You’ve given the NYPD a break these past couple of months, I think you’re in need of one.” A wink finishes your statement and she surges forward, hands on your face to pull you into a searing kiss. It expresses her love for you more than words ever could.

With the cutest most beautiful smile you’ve ever laid eyes on, she throws her door open and excitedly tells you to come on. And you’re more than happy to follow. 

Leaving the bags you secretly packed in the trunk, you accept Natasha’s outstretched hand, and allow her to guide you around the grounds. 

The view of the lake and everything beyond looks even better than the pictures let on. For a last minute trip to Jersey, this was considerably good.

Despite how tempting it is to stroll down the dock and hold Natasha in your arms like the clichés you read about, you save that for later, instead following the still curiously excited redhead towards the house. 

In one action you scoop your fiancé up into your arms after having unlocked the back door. Her arms wrap around your neck and she raises her eyebrows at you in question.

“Figured I could get some practice.” Your teasing tone is back, your words bringing a coy smile to her lips.

“Are you still excited?” She asks as you step into the house, careful to not bang her head on the door.“ I know we’ve pushed it off a few times.” 

You gingerly set her down.

Postponing the wedding was never due to a lack of wanting to be married. 

The first plan was thrown out the window when Lagos happened and the team fell apart. Neither of you were sure about getting married while on the run, your family no longer around. But you’d found yourselves in the city of love, completely taken by the atmosphere, and decided that there was no need to wait. Then Thanos came. Losing half of your family to his homicidal plan hit you both incredibly hard.

Three and a half years it took for you both to realize that maybe you couldn’t get everyone back, which also made you appreciate that through everything you’ve always had each other. While there was nothing you could do about the past, you had a say over your present and you wanted to spend as much of that as wives as you could. Only for Scott Lang to show up in the midst of planning with the idea of the Time Heist.

All of that happened, you got everyone back and were blessed with your family again. So when things settled you both got back to planning. A year and six months after the final battle against Thanos, where Thor “went for the head”, you were finally a mere two months away from making the woman that is the love of your life your wife. 

“Am I excited to become a Romanoff?” Your question trails off with a pondering gaze to the ceiling. Natasha’s eyebrows pinch together at your need to think about it and seeing her frown makes you laugh.“ After three failed attempts I think it’s safe to say I’m pretty damn excited.”

The redhead smacks your arm in annoyance at your constantly playful behavior and you wrap your arms around her waist, laughing once again.“ You’re incorrigible.”

“Oh absolutely,” you wink,“ but I think that’s one of the many things you love about me.”

Her eyes narrow and her lips press together in a thin line, a hum of uncertainty leaving her lips. That makes your jaw drop and this time Natasha laughs. When she raises a brow at you, you nod in understanding. 

A beat of silence passes before you both set off to do something, Natasha offering to make tea and you go to grab the luggage from the car. Taking both straight to the bedroom before going back to join Natasha. 

She raises the cup of tea to her lips, eyes focused on the view outside the window. You slip behind her and wrap your arms around her waist, resting your chin on her shoulder and looking out the window as well. 

You know something’s on her mind but you’d learned a long time ago to let her open up herself as opposed to prying.

“Do you think everyone will be able to make it?” She finally speaks up.

Biting your lip in thought, you take a deep breath,“ I think everyone is going to try their best to be here but things come up. Everyone has RSVP'd so they want to be there that’s for sure.” You’re taken aback when you turn and find those green eyes staring back at you.

The most intense emotions swirl in those angel eyes.

“I know I keep saying it but, I love you, so much.” Her free hand raises to rest on your cheek. 

“And I, you my love.”

Adjusting herself back into your hold completely, she returns her gaze to the lake.“ Thank you for this trip as well.”

“I figured if I brought you out here I could get lucky.” 

That statement seems to be the straw that breaks the camel's back. Natasha slips from your grasp and heads towards the back door.“ Wait no, I’m sorry. I meant to say that I did it cause I love you and I wanted to spend time with you!” You call after her, only for her to continue to walk away. 

For the rest of this trip, Natasha knows you’re going to continue to be a pain in her ass but she also knows that for every annoying and teasing comment, there are ten times as many affirmations of love and whispers of sweet nothings. 

You whisked her away to give her the break she so greatly needs and deserves and you plan to make sure she enjoys it in full.

* * * * * *

Taglist: @owloftheshadows

[sweetwolfcupcake]

Allurement: Waves

Yandere Namjoon x Reader

The scantily-leaved trees held on to the last of their dying offspring. But the west-winds seemed to be unbothered, trying to tear away those leaves from the branches as the rest, hued in dull to bright shades of nature danced along on the ground.

And a few crushed beneath (Y/N)'s shoes, it would have been a fun activity: crushing dried leaves under her shoes. But she was rushing towards the car waiting for her.

"So quick!" Park Jimin, as sweet and polite as the man could be, was no less a sassy hellion if he required to be. And of all, he loved to sass around her the best. But most of the time, he did have a good reason to.

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry. I woke up late." (Y/N) was quick to apologise, as she passed him a sheepish smile while taking a seat beside him.

"You are lucky that I like you, besides, we can always drive a bit faster, or take the shortcut? So do put on your seatbelt." he smiled at her before the car roared to life and the wheels came to life and the car went off.

It had not been too long since she had begun working under Mr Kim as his secretary, temporary secretary. About three months or so. But the previous autumn, when he had put forth the proposal of giving her the job, it did not feel long ago, while in reality. it had been a year, a whole, complete revolution of the earth around the Sun and there she was, riding with Jimin to her workplace- the Kim Group of Companies' headquarters, where the respected young CEO sat and operated from.

And within a year, nothing seemed to have changed, the water of life seemed to be stagnant. But she could feel the change, deep, greater changes like upheaval in the ocean, the waves, gigantic, monstrous, terrifying. Threatening to drown her. There was so much that had changed.

Park Jimin was a great company and an excellent friend. She had found out soon after the bond of friendship had been established between the two.

Kim Namjoon was an excellent boss and that, her job as his secretary, as reasonably draining, had so much to learn from. She admired Miss Choi for her efficiency, (Y/N) had so much more to learn, both from her job as well as her employer.

And she also discovered, gradually of course, that behind the all too sophisticated, groomed gentleman laid a clumsy gentle giant who would often burn his fingers trying to make himself a cup of coffee, or even trying to pass on hot food and drinks to her. And it was devastatingly endearing.

But most of all, (Y/N) had learnt that her mother was dying. The illness was eating her mother away, chipping away her health and endurance and there was nothing (Y/N) could do about it, nothing could prevent the inevitable. So she made peace with the fact, even though she knew that deep within, she was dreading the day her mother's sunken eyes would close for eternity. But she came to accept the fact that her mother could not be saved. All she could do was to make peace with the tragedy of life, that lied within the shortness of it.

So on the surface, (Y/N)'s life was calm and stable as a lake, yet the giant waves of changing wind terrified her under the same surface.

----

"You have a meeting with the lead investors this morning, the files and reports have been arranged at your desk." she listed off from her phone gifted by the company. It was not the day's schedule, a day in Kim Namjoon's life was nothing if it could not be defined as 'busy', it was the first half of a typical Monday morning in the company.

As soon as she was done, which was rather quickly, she placed a cup of steaming brew in front of her employer- double expresso with two cubes of sugar- just the way he liked it. Mr Kim smiled at her appreciatively. It was one of the many things she liked about him and admired. He never took his employees for granted, he had never failed to let her know that he appreciated her efforts to keep his day running smoothly and sorting things out for him.

"Thank you (Y/N), I hope you had your share of morning booster as well?" she nodded with a faint smile playing on her lips before handing off the files to him as she began to brief him regarding the topics and issues he and the company had been working on.

The projects and the required consumptions and stock- price data. It was not every day that the investors would gather at the conference room, but since a new project at hand was to begin, a meeting with the investors was required.

"Well, the reports look good (Y/N), did Mr Min mail you the required files?"

"Yes, the deal was explained there. He would be presenting along with you, it is regarding the profit margin and how the chances of loss and risk are low this time," she explained, to which he nodded

"Yes, and I require you to be with me in this meeting."

"Of course I will be with you, Sir, I am your secretary."

"No, I mean sit beside me, you won't be standing behind as you have been. And I expect all your focus on the presentation, okay? There is so much you would be learning from this." she gave him an obedient nod with a small smile.

She did not intend to disappoint him at any cost. Mr Kim was her role model, she looked up to him. Given, that she despised the spotlight and the position of CEO was not for her, but she was found herself to be a perfect fit for the position of secretary.  Despite how demanding her job could get, Mr Kim was an excellent boss and mentor. He was at ease, most of the time. At most, she had seen his eyes grow cold and jaws clenched, perhaps only twice, that too if something went seriously downhill. It was a sliver of what might be laying under the controlled and calm persona. He was a human too after all.

She made her way towards her desk as soon as the briefing was over. Mr Kim's office was massive, and he did not wish to waste time on having to ring her to come to his office, thus he had a desk for her arranged in his office itself. It was kind of a mini-open office, her boss and her working under the same roof, no barriers between them, she could approach him anytime she wanted to and he did not need a phone anymore to summon her.

They had settled into a routine like that. She would begin her day by bringing him his much-needed cup of coffee and listing the first half of his morning schedule, then she could begin with her works of arranging files, stacking reports, sending emails, scanning through and replying to the mails, researching on the potential business partners, making and answering phone calls, deciding and listing appointment and other project-related materials those were deemed necessary by Mr Kim.

And all the months of working under him had been able to provide her with a unique perspective of him. There were so many things she would have never been able to discover otherwise, for instance, the fact that he loved crabs- not on his plate- but on his palms as he would gently cradle those tiny creatures whenever he would come across them. He even owned a crab, a pet crab. She would not have known had he not rambled off regarding his love for crabs while he had ordered gourmet food for them when she was required to stay some extra hours, which was a frequent occurrence. The workload could be a bit too much for him to handle, besides, those extra hours consisted far less of work one would expect and more of them talking, she had finally been able to let him enter her comfort zone, she would be damned if she had not. He had been exceptionally generous to her, he was kind and approachable, time and again he had proved it, both as a superior as well as a person.

He was warm, gentle and funny, unintentionally funny. Especially when he would break his glasses more than once a month, it would be a miracle if his AirPods would not be lost within the first week of purchase. And while his constant misplacement of files and other such important documents had managed to make her purse her lips in annoyance more than once. The warm, dimpled sheepish smile had did not allow the annoyance to remain. Because even if he would be exhausted after a day's of overwhelming work, he would not forget to wish her good night before they left the office, because even if she would be a bit late with her coffee, he never threw a fit like one would expect the boss to do. And because despite his busy schedule, he would manage to inquire about her mother's health.

Mr Kim was different. He was everything any woman would crave for and desire. And despite not being the one with shallow indulgence, she had found herself falling for her employer. It did not happen overnight. It was a gradual process, like sleep.

(L/N)(Y/N) was in love with Kim Namjoon, her boss, the heir of the legendary Kim Group of Companies.

And it had been so easy to fall in love with that man. Despite her previous reservations. And she was well-aware that the love would go tragically unreciprocated. They were worlds apart in more than one ways, the social gap, the economic gap, the professional. Everything laid in front of her to see, understand and accept the fact that her love for Kim Namjoon could not bridge the distance between the moon and a mere earthly admirer. To him, she would be many of the faceless women waiting for his attention and thronging around him if he came to know about her newfound feelings. And she did not want that to happen. She did not wish to ruin the sweet, friendly professional bond she had established with him.

And yet, she could not help the bittersweet blooms in her heart every time she would see him smile. Because she knew that sooner or later, he would be having a much warmer smile, eyes shining with love and adoration for a woman who would own his heart. It was impossible for a man like Kim Namjoon to remain single for long, he was the country's most eligible bachelor after all. Or perhaps he already had someone special in his heart, a secret lover perhaps. The mere thought dimmed her mood and often made her shoulders slump.

Of all the massive, daunting waves threatening to crash upon her, her newfound romantic attachment to her employer was the most terrifying one. Because she knew that wave would come crashing down and drown her. And that single wave against all others frightened her the most because it threatened to cause upheaval on the calm surface of her life and become the cause of her ultimate demise.

****

Taglist(Kindly remind me later if I missed anyone)- @whatpageisthis @amoc94 @theresa-nam-nam-me @dearbambideer @casualminiaturetimemachine @njrwifey @kpopisnicee @illnevertrustmyselfagain @potterbrooke @luvaffaire @bighitfics @mochimochipie @vixenwerr

[miraculouspenta]

Different Limits

Original Idea by @jinx-jade​​

Thanks to @moonlitceleste​ for beta reading :D

'What have I done,' Damian thought. Dick was lying on the floor with an arm that was clearly broken. He had surprised Damian with a hug from behind, triggering his instinct to attack. Damian had reacted by twisting his arm, resulting with Dick being on the floor. Jason entered the door when he heard Dick’s shriek of pain. "WHAT THE F*CK, DAMIAN!" he shouted when he saw Dick. His whole family had scolded him, Bruce had benched him for a whole two months, and Alfred had given him a disappointed stare.

Damian couldn't stand it. Not anymore.

He snapped.

He had tried, he really had.

But it was never enough.

As the heir to the Demon's Head, attacking at unknown touch has been burned into him. Touch had always meant danger. It was second nature to him now. Unfortunately, his family did not know nor do they understand. Two years of constant reminders that he had done terrible things. Two years of constant reminders that he was merely a killing machine. Two years of greater expectations, both in standard and amount. He had enough.

Damian said goodbye to his pets and ran.

After a good hour of running, he dropped into an alley and cried.

In his vulnerable state, he didn't see a man creep up. A man holding a gun. The unknown adult was planning to kidnap the boy, but as soon as his hands reached Damian, he reacted. He flipped the man over his shoulder like what he did to Dick earlier. But in his state, it didn't affect much. The man pulled out a knife and stabbed him in his side. It ended the fight.

The kidnapper ended up running away, leaving a heavily injured Damian to slowly watch the world as his vision turned black.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Marinette, who had just finished some business with Superman, decided to take a walk in Gotham before going home. Along the way, she spotted a boy covered in blood as she crossed an alleyway. He was already unconscious, and Marinette knew she couldn't just leave him there. So she opened a portal and went through it and carried the boy in her hands. She laid him down in her spare room and left to get her medical supplies.

Approximately six hours later, the boy woke up. His eyes scanned the room as he tried to up and leave. Limping, he tried to head to the window. "Hi sweetie, you need to calm down," Marinette’s soft voice said as she walked slowly to the boy., "You should be resting; moving might agitate your injuries." The boy just stared at her. Marinette stood up slowly and walked over. "May I?" she asked, reaching for his hand. When he nodded, she carefully took his hand and led him to the bed. Once there, she helped Damian into a comfortable position. "Do you have anyone you can call?" she questioned. When he didn't answer, she simply nodded her head and asked him what he would like to eat.

Damian ended up staying for three weeks because Marinette refused to let him leave until he was fully healed. The twelve year old grew closer to the woman. Once healed, he confessed that he has nowhere to stay. Marinette took the information in stride and told him he was more than welcome to stay with her. And stay he did.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Living with Marinette was incredible. Unlike his grandfather and his father, she didn't place any expectations on him. At one point, he slipped and called her mom. Damian had froze after he said that, scared of how she would react. It ended up with Marinette asking him whether or not he would mind her adopting him. Damian happily agreed and they soon got the paperwork done. (Chloe is conveniently Marinette’s lawyer). Damian wore the Dupain-Cheng name with pride. As Grand Guardian, Marinette took it upon herself to teach Damian magic. Starting with glamour, they covered the basics of magic.

Two weeks after the adoption, while reading the daily news, Damian came across an article on the front page.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The Daily Planet

BREAKING NEWS!!

Not more than six weeks ago, twelve year old Damian Wayne was reported missing. The only biological child of Bruce Wayne was suspected to have ran away for an unknown reason. He was last seen running to his room before he left. “Maybe I was a little too harsh,” Bruce Wayne admitted, “But this isn’t the first time I had to ground him because he wasn’t able to control his strength.” The young boy had somehow managed to flip Richard John Grayson, Bruce Wayne’s eldest, when he had surprised him with a hug. “Damian and I may not get along, but that doesn’t mean I don’t care,” Tim Drake, co-CEO of Wayne Enterprises said.

Damian Wayne is a tan boy with dark hair and striking green eyes. He weighs around 90 lbs at 4’9 ft tall. Currently, he is twelve years old. Multiple search parties have been launched. I myself know Damian personally from all the times he has visited my son. If you find the boy, please contact xx-xxx-xxx-xxx and we will get to you as soon as possible.

- Clark Kent

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

After reading, Damian had a breakdown. Marinette rushed in when she heard the sobs of her child. She didn’t say anything and instead she approached slowly wrapping him in her arms. She let him cry as she rubbed his back and once he calmed down, he told her his story and why he left.

“All these new expectations were just overwhelming,” he said, “‘No killing’, ‘justice not vengeance’—it’s like they were expecting me to turn back. I never wanted to hurt them, but it’s something that is a reflex now. It’s not easy to let go of a habit.” Marinette was silent throughout his whole rant. She knew how terrible Ra’s and Talia were but that didn’t make it better. She knew the Batman could be cold, but the fact that he didn’t listen and try to understand infuriated her.

“Ra’s and Talia should know not to mess with me, but if I ever see your father I can and will punch him,” she growled. Damian smiled as he nuzzled into his mother’s chest.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Three years passed. Damian and Marinette’s bond grew stronger while the search parties grew hopeless. The Justice League was also involved; so were the Titans and the Young Justice. They concluded that Damian was either dead or hiding really well. The former option was discarded when Zatara and Zatanna had almost managed to track him, but unfortunately the spell suddenly shattered when it was nearing.

Desperate, the batfamily decided to reach out to the Grand Guardian of the Miraculous. Imagine their surprise when they saw Damian on their way to her house. When they ran to him, Damian, now fifteen, went into an alley and disappeared. They rushed to Marinette’s house and knocked. They heard hard breathing and a gentle voice trying to calm the other party down. Leaning towards the door, Dick found that it was unlocked and tumbled in.

What they saw was Damian kneeling on the floor crying in the middle of a breakdown and Marinette trying to soothe him. “Out,” Marinette glared. The boys obeyed and waited anxiously. The person that they had been searching for was under the protection of the Guardian all this time. It made sense why even both Zatara and Zatanna couldn’t track him down.

An hour later, Marinette opened the door telling them to come in and wait. She took some water and placed them on her coffee table saying that Damian was taking a shower. As soon as she sat down the boys began to fire questions. They stopped after a good fifteen minutes and noticing that Marinette wasn’t saying anything. “I know why Damian ran away, yes, but it is not my place to say. I can ask him later, and I will not say anything without his permission. But I will say this,” Marinette said, voice colder than ice, “You f*cked up.” Marinette stood up to check on Damian. “By the way,” she stopped for a moment, “I adopted him three years ago.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Damian ended up being the one to tell them everything. Everything from why he ran away to why he decided to stay. The Waynes felt bad; they hadn’t even bothered thinking about his perspective. Looking back, Jason and Bruce realized what Damian had said about the League was true. “I’m- We’re sorry Damian,” Dick apologized. “Are you willing to come back?”

“No,” he said. The Waynes were visibly saddened.

“But I am willing to start over.”

1445 words

I had tons of fun writing this fic, hope you guys like it

~Leen

@animegirlweeb @battybatbat @crystalangelluna @dorkus-minimus @galaxylightmoon  @iglowinggemma28  @insane-fangirl-of-everything  @jayjayspixiepop​ @jjmjjktth​ @karukofox21​ @lunathealphafemale​ @megaafangirl​ @miraculouslydumb​ @myazael​ @nickristus-dreamer​ @our-preciousss​ @samiamack​ @sh31bin0​ @user00000003​ @waffleyunsure​

[issaxcharlie]

We say we're friends, we play pretend (2/2 )You're more to me, we're everything

PART 1 HERE

Pairing: Charlie Gillespie x Fem reader

Summary: Charlie and Y/N were best friends and a couple as teens, after their breakup they meet again 4 years later on JATP and have to work together. Will they be able to recover more than their friendship?

If Charlie knew anything in life, it was that he had to take things carefully. Especially with such strong feelings involved. In general, when you like someone, the least you want is for that person to see you as a friend, but particularly for them, recovering their friendship bond was the most important step.

“You were so cute!” Tori and Owen are looking at photos of the guitarist's childhood on his phone. A photo of little Charlie in a suit grinning from ear to ear while holding a girl as if he is spinning her around shows up.

That memory is one of his favorites. He was always a very loved boy with many friends, but in the case of girls he was not the most popular. His best friend on the other hand was, at least for him, the most beautiful girl he had ever seen and boys were always around her. He knew he needed to find a partner for the dance so that she wouldn't feel guilty or he wouldn't feel humiliated by not having someone to go with.

However, he was rejected, quite a few times. He didn’t want to say anything about the dance to his best friend that week because he knew that she would stay home with him without hesitation. But that day half an hour before, he arrived in a suit and flowers for her, so at least he could have a picture of such an important moment with the person he loves the most, and he was the one surprised.

“It was about time Char, we have to take about 30 pictures before we go. Mom bought you a tie so we can match." She is up and down looking for one of her shoes, not even turning to see her friend who doesn’t know if he understood correctly.

At that moment she finally turns to see him and runs for a hug, Charlie barely had time to raise his arm with the flowers.

“You look so handsome, and the flowers are perfect. Best partner ever, I love you so much C! I’ll be ready in a second.”

She had planned to go with him from the beginning, and thought it was an implicit pact. That realization made Charlie's heart beat a lot faster that day. No matter how many people invited her, she wanted to go with him. He spent the night with his favorite person dancing and singing, feeling grateful for her, this light who always chooses him of all people.

“I looked pretty good in those clothes.” Y/N says as she and Madison sit at the table.

“You always look amazing, but yeah that night was special.” It's also the night that he realized that he was feeling more than friendship for his best friend, but this is not the time to talk about it.

He decides to continue preparing his waffles, than even though it already has like 5 ingredients, it seems something is missing.

Y/N blushes a little and smiles. “Here, handsome.” She hands him a can of pringles that she grabbed from the cafeteria when she saw him making eggo’s.

“Perfect, Y/N Y/L teaching everyone why she's my soulmate.” Everyone at the table begins to complain about what they qualify as the most disgusting thing they have ever seen, while the former couple smiles happily as they secretly link their legs under the table and continue their breakfast.

Little details like that one, or as removing all the products that she would take with milk from her hands because she seems to forget every morning that she is allergic can make a difference.

“You are 22 years old and you are still as careless as when we were children, I do not understand how you have survived these 4 years."

“You were always the one who cared about it and kept me safe, I guess unconsciously having you close my brain says, ‘no worries, Char will take care of it.’ So I’m sorry, I'll be more careful.”

A seriously ill 10-year Y/N on the way to the hospital invaded Charlie's mind, whom quickly shook off the bad memory.

“It’s all good, bright star.”

“What did you say?” Madison asks.

“Bright star. I know Kenny calls her ‘golden star’, but he’s the copycat. I've been calling her like that all my life.”

Y/N just smiles, enjoying the moment. She had not heard those words from his lips for years, and honestly Kenny also calling her a star even If it was sweet, made her remember Charles practically every day, and that didn’t help at all to get over the guitarist.

“You are my brightest burning star.” Madison replies, looking at Charlie with amusement in her eyes.

At that moment the actor understands what is going through his co-star's head and panics.

“So this queen is the one who has you so inspired, I should have realized it before.”

“She’s always my inspiration, period.” Y/N starts to laugh while blushing, and Madison’s attention falls completely on her.

“And I guess ‘Bright’ is a coincidence? And rise through the night, you and I, We will fight to shine together...Bright forever.” The songwriter wants to disappear at that precise moment while everyone turns to see her as if she had a third eye on her forehead.

“But you wrote bright long before you even knew Charlie was part of the proyect.” Owen adds, smirking.

“If you are asking me if I draw inspiration from the people I love, to write... the answer is yes. And yes, of course I love him.” How is it possible for the guitarist to slow things down when she says things like that in front of everyone? All he wants right now is to kiss her. This discovery means that despite the time she still had him in mind, the song cannot have been written for long. Hope is flooding his body.

“Ok but they inspiring each other is the sweetest thing in the world, goals right there.” Tori adds excited, her friends blushing.

All those teasing moments helped them to be more transparent with their feelings, hugging, touching, and basically staying close each time they finished their work obligations, almost as if they were afraid that the other would disappear or as if they were trying to make up for lost time.

“We need a lot more energy, especially from Charlie. Luke lives for music, nothing can give him more joy than being on stage."

"They have been working for 17 hours straight and at least 15 attempts with this musical." Paul tries to reason with Kenny mid-recording of Now or Never, which still does not come out as the director was expecting.

“What was in the recording studio that is not here now? I thought they would show an even greater energy than there after they stepped on stage."

They both turn to each other, as if the light had been turned on at the same time, and Paul takes his phone.

A few minutes later Y/N walks on set, Sunset Curve smiles upon seeing her.

“I wanted to make sure that we are fulfilling the vision of our beloved songwriter. Let's not disappoint her, okay? Let's try it one more time." Kenny shouts before starting to record again.

Instantly the energy is seen a thousand times higher, Charlie more radiant than ever, while Y/N replicates his energy behind the cameras, flooding him with sass and attitude. The young singer also motivates her now friends and unknowingly gave Sunset Curve that extra thing they needed to finally achieve the perfect performance. Kenny and Paul doing a fist bump behind the screens.

Soon their chemistry and energy turned into open conversation. The way they made everyone on set cry the first time they practiced Unsaid Emily or how connected and dreamy they were while dancing to Perfect Harmony when Madison wasn't on set.

But they still weren’t together, at least officialy.

If Charlie was honest, the fear of throwing himself all over and losing her again terrified him. The industry they love so much and decided to work in doesn't let having a relationship be easy, and if things go wrong again, they don't know if it might be possible to fix it again. It was basically a leap of faith.

Nonetheless, he knows he's willing, but what about her?

That morning he enters the set overwhelmed with his situation when he sees an even more overwhelmed Y/N walk by without even turning around, almost running to the recording studio.

“I advise you to give her some space for a few hours. Let's say she’s going to have a pretty difficult day."

"Why? What happened?" Jeremy asks as he and Owen stand next to the director.

“She got a call from the people at Netflix, they have already approved almost all the music except ‘Stand Tall’, the closing song, and her favorite. They will come in an hour to hear her presentation and convince them that it is good enough."

At that moment Charlie has an idea. There is no way that he will leave her alone, if he has the opportunity to help her he will do it and he’ll drag along all the people he needs to achieve it.

"Kenny, do you happen to have the music sheets for the song?"

“Don’t tell me-” Owen tries to ask but Charlie interrumpts him.

“Yes, let’s get to work boys.”

An hour later Y/N is freaking out, and she can't help but wish Charlie was around. Of all the days he could choose to disappear, he chose today.

She walks towards the auditorium, where to her surprise way more people than she expected are present, including most of the cast. But there is no sign of her lover boy anywhere.

Now or never. She takes a deep breath and start playing the keyboard. Her voice is the only thing that accompanies the keys. Everything is going as planned, but she can't help but feel distracted, nervous, and overwhelmed.

She is about to give up this fight internally when a drum before the second verse gives her the strength to continue singing, Owen smiles and winks at her to give her some peace of mind, and just a few seconds later Jeremy begins to accompany them with the bass. She knows whose idea it is and she just waits for him to come out from wherever he is hidden.

"I’m going out of my mind, Whatever happens, even if I'm the last standing I’ma stand tall, I’ma stand tall." His voice finishes waking her up and she accompanies him in the chorus, their chemistry electrifying everyone until every single person is standing, the cast supporting, dancing and clapping while the couple continues to focus on each other, separating out of obligation every so often but taking the opportunity to sing along with Jeremy and Owen who were doing an amazing job too, impacting with their solos.

The song ends and the boys disappear while Y/N talks to the people who came to evaluate her work, who finally approve the last song on the soundtrack that she has been working on for so long and to which she put all her soul.

The very second people outside the cast leave, Y/N looks for who has always been the boy of her life, the one who has proven that even though the years go by, they only need a few seconds to be themselves again, to be everything again. And as soon as she finds him hanging around only with the other 3 members of JATP she runs and jumps on him, entwining her legs at his hips and hugging him from the neck with all her strength, he immediately secures her by putting his arms around her waist.

“Thank you, thank you, thank you!”

The band starts screaming “Kiss, kiss, kiss, kiss!” hoping that one of the two will already dare to take the next step, and Y/N stamps her lips against Charlie's, who reacts almost automatically and kisses her back hard, deciding quickly this is the happiest moment of his life. He finally got the girl, or with what just happened, her fierce girl got him.

Hours later both are in Y/N's apartment curled up on a sofa, enjoying being together again.

“Yes, that sexy, beautiful, adorable and talented man is my boyfriend, Charlie Gillespie.”

Charlie chuckles at her random declaration. “What was that?”

“I’m practicing, and I wanted to say it aloud. I’m just so happy right now.”

His heart melts, she’s the most beautiful thing in the world. His brightest burning star.

His girlfriend doesn't give him time to reply, devouring his lips again. After all, she has four years to recover, and as always, he is more than willing to help her.

Thank you so much for reading!

NEXT PART HERE

Tag list:

@siennanoelle01

@reblogserpent

@kiss-themoongoodbye

@writerinlearning

@rachelle3musicals