#wildfirewildflower

[galacticwildfire]

found.

Twenty Four

Pairing: Kenobi!oc x Din Djarin

Summary: Satine and Obi-wan’s daughter fought in the war against the Empire and lost her faith when she lost Mandalore. Until she found him. A lone Mandalorian searching for a Jedi.

Warnings: TW for torture, severe ptsd, mention of past miscarriage, brief discussion of abortion. No fluff, only angst. Boba time. Missiles. Head injuries, burns, near death

Word Count: 7.4k

A/N: it gets worse before it gets better but I made a new moodboard

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Time itself comes to a standstill as we look upon one another but despite the years, despite going to Tatooine to hunt him down... nothing could have prepared me for this.

"You know why I have come," he tells me, his voice the only thing about him I recognise.

"You should be dead," I say, hand wrapped around the hilt of my saber.

"I should be after you left me for dead," he replies and I feel it, the anger, the betrayal that he should have seen coming. "But you never could do it could you?"

"Neither could you," I remind him, and despite every piece of reason in my head screaming otherwise, I feel safe in that security that he could never bring himself to ever truly hurt me, he just stood by as others did. "You don't scare me Boba."

Something in him almost softens, but only for a moment. "It is not fear I want to provoke, not anymore."

His words catch me off guard and leave me almost confused by the change of heart I feel in him, but I ignore it for the sake of self preservation.

"You look older," he says, as if we were meeting under normal circumstances.

"You look like shit," I tell him, trying to bite back the true horror at what I did to him.

"Getting struck down and devoured by a sarlaac does that," he says and gets to business as if we're negotiating in a messy divorce but there is little else that could be used to describe Boba and I. "I want my armour back."

"I want lots of things back, things you took from me," I tell him, Din emerging from cover with his blaster drawn since negotiations have been established. "But life isn't fair, is it?"

I eye the carved wooden weapons he has at his back, weapons I recognise as belonging to the sand people of Tatooine but it is surprisingly not violence he negotiates with.

"I have brought you a peace offering."

"A peace offering?" I repeat and actually laugh, feeling Din's alarm at the sound. "The only peace offering I would accept is Vader's head and unfortunately that is ashes on Endor."

Looking at him now I wonder what he knows if he's lived in isolation on Tatooine because he looks surprised by my revelation. "So you killed the bastard then?"

Now I'm the one in surprise as I scoff "Don't act like you wanted him dead."

"Of course I wanted him dead," he says and takes a step closer, a step that makes Din raise his blaster. "I'm not after you Mandalorian."

"You left me for dead," Din says and I see a look of satisfaction in Boba's eyes that stirs a new type of rage in me.

"Fair is fair," Boba says, ignoring him to speak to me. "I'd call it justice."

"Revenge you mean?"

"One and the same," he says, determined to hit every nerve he knows how. "That's what you said, isn't it princess?"

If this is how he wants to play, I'll play along perfectly.

"Yes." I take a step closer now, looking him dead in the eyes as I tell him. "It was both when I left you for dead."

"I could take revenge," he tells me, but fails to intimidate. "I certainly have enough reason to, but fortunately for you I am a changed man."

I laugh again, the type of unhinged only Boba Fett can make me after he put that madness in my brain and twisted it into what it is now. "Boba Fett? A changed man?"

He isn't amused and looks back towards his ship "I thought you may say that, so here is my peace offering. My armour for yours."

My face falls and I blink at him "What?"

He doesn't repeat himself. "You heard me."

I shake my head "My armour is on-"

"Was on Kalevala," he says and I go cold. "I'm the one who brought you there after Mandalore was destroyed remember? You took my armour from Tatooine, so I returned the favour. Still covered in blood and ashes on board my ship for the taking. You order the Mandalorian to get mine, and Fennec will get yours."

"Fennec?" Din exclaims and I look back at him in confusion until I sense an unfamiliar presence.

"You have a keen ear Mando," a woman says from up on the ridge armed with a rifle, a woman that Din certainly seems to know and I look at him, raising an eyebrow at the panic I feel from him.

"You were dead," he says and my eye goes back to Boba, able to read him in one glance and I should have known he'd never come to face me without an extra gun.

"I believe it is time for introductions," Boba says while I shake my head at him in warning. "Meet Fennec Shand, a sharpshooter I've brought to ensure this transaction goes smoothly."

"Fuck you," I say and order "Din if she moves kill her."

"So it's going to be that way then," Boba says, almost disappointed. "Alright then, your lover pulls that trigger and she'll unload onto that kid she's locked onto."

And there he is, the Boba Fett I know.

"You wouldn't dare," I breathe.

"I think we both know I would," he says but I know the kid is quite safe. "There does not have to be violence."

"Say the word and he's dead," Din says from behind me, both of us knowing the kid is safe behind that shield. 

"This is between her and I Mandalorian," Boba says, he knows his targets, he would know damn well the reputation Din has. "You shoot, Fennec shoots." He looks back at me now. "Your little green friend as quite the bounty on his head."

With those words, all decency is off the table.

"If you think you're going to come here to take my son away-"

"He's a little green to be yours," he says and a chill runs through my bones as he dares to say "But a son for a son seems fair to me."

Din reaches for me as I march forward but holds his position with his blaster trained on Fennec as I slap Boba hard, tears of rage burning in my eyes as I whisper "I hate you."

"I know you do princess," he says, his face may be barely recognisable but his eyes... the same damn eyes. "I'm not here to hurt you."

But I know him better than that.

"I don't believe you," I breathe and the moment my saber is at his neck his finger is on the trigger of his blaster. My match. My perfect adversary. "I will never believe a word you say again."

Still he insists "All I want is my armour."

"Liar," I say, searching his eyes. "You've followed me halfway across the galaxy for one thing only."

He entertains me. "And what's that princess?"

I can't bring myself to say it with Din standing so close but Boba knows. He always knows.

"Revenge," I say, if only to stir something else in his heart that is more bearable for me to feel. "For me."

I'm trembling as he touches my cheek with the barrel of his blaster, but not from fear, anything but fear, and I feel pure horror from Din that I haven't killed him for that simple touch alone.

"I did come for you," he tells me and I don't inch away from him as he leans closer as if nobody else is standing here. "On Tatooine I came for you, but not to harm you."

"Liar," I say again, fighting what I know is the truth. "Why else would you come if not for revenge?"

"I came to help you," he says, the coldness of his blaster on my cheek keeping me still as he asks "Do you really think I'd let you face an Imperial attack alone?"

I feel Din watching with a primal anger I've never felt from him and remind Boba "I wasn't alone and you left him there to die."

"If I didn't kill him he would have killed me," he argues, as if leaving him bleeding out for me to find was only a minor complication. "And I wasn't the one with the shiny beskar."

"No, you aren't," I say, finding a sick pleasure in taking from him the one thing he loves. "Because I have yours and once I put you back in the ground where you belong I'll melt it down and add it to my collection of trophies. Right beside Maul's saber on Kalevala." 

He ignores my threat to tell me "You're the only one who wants violence little one."

"I don't believe you."

"Kill me then," he says, calling my bluff. "We both know you can't do it."

A darkness settles over me, the same darkness that led to me being charged as a war criminal. "You have no idea what I am capable of."

"Then do it. Kill me. Do what you couldn't do on Tatooine." The heat of my saber at his neck does little to scare him as he taunts "Or have you started calling yourself a Jedi again?" My hand grips the hilt of my saber tight knowing one flick of my wrist is all it would take. "I remember when your daddy came to kill mine, but he couldn't do it either."

I blink at him in bewilderment "What?"

"I remember shooting at your father myself," he tells me, words he never has before, and I go cold as his own memories flash before my eyes. Cold rain and shots fired upon my father only to end in the flash of a purple saber and a beskar helmet rolling on coarse ground. "He was no match for a Mandalorian."

"Then how come he lived while yours lost his head," I hiss and he grabs me by my hair, holding me by the scalp with his blaster to my head. "Too soon?"

"Let her go!" Din orders, firing a warning shot only for Fennec to fire one back at Din and I smirk at the look of unbridled rage in Boba's eyes, living for the thrill of hitting him where it hurts. "Let her go or I drop you and Fennec!"

"This is between us," I tell Din, smiling as I taunt "I should have aimed for your neck, let your head roll in the sand just like your donors."

With those words he bares my throat, my hair in his fist as he brings his blaster from my head down to my stomach, knowing just where to hit me, but nothing can ever hurt me more than he already has. "You've become a cruel woman."

"Do you think I'm still that nineteen year old girl who cried and begged for you Boba?" I ask him and laugh again at the pain shooting through him, wanting him to suffer as I have. "You killed her that day on Cloud City. There's nothing left you can do to hurt me now."

"I can kill the kid," he threatens. "Like you killed our son."

"Our son?" I repeat numbly and feel Din's own horror as I tell him. "You mean the bloody tissue that was left on the floor of that cell after Vader tortured it out of me?" Boba's eyes go utterly cold now, finally realising it was not my doing. "It's for the better because I was never going to have any child of yours after what you did to me."

"Kyra," he begins, the emotion in his voice making me wince but I'm past apologies.

"It's too late for remorse Boba," I tell him, having no pity left for him and dig the knife deeper. "Everything you blamed me for is your own doing. Every betrayal you believed, none of it was ever real. It was all Vader screwing with your head like he did mine."

Finally after all these years I find myself absolved of my own guilt and see the horror in his eyes as he realises I never betrayed him and that the death of our love is his blood to bear.

His voice is uneven now "If I knew-"

"You would have what? Struck Vader down?" I ask as I push him off me and he doesn't try to push me back. "You were too weak."

"Says the one who's too weak to strike me down now," he says, but the fight is gone from his voice and filled with a quiet ache before he resorts to the one thing he can still hate me for. "Just like your father was."

I raise an eyebrow "You think I'm weak because I'm a Jedi?"

"I know you are."

I give a nod and turn my back on him, walking back towards Din as I raise my hand to choke the sniper up on the ridge and watch her reach for her throat as Boba finally panics. 

"Stop that!"

"No," I answer before channelling the strength of the force here and throwing her off the ledge into a nearby rockface. Din and Boba both jump back as she groans on the ground and I use the force to pull her rifle to me, handing it to Din as I return to his side. 

"Kyra," Din says quietly as he takes the rifle. "I owe Fennec, she is not our enemy." 

"Well he is," I reply and turn back to Boba. "I don't care what you've become, I don't care if you're sorry, not when I have to live with the consequences of what you did."

Boba looks at Fennec, finally realising just what his betrayal led me to become. "I thought you were above that."

"I was, but not after what Vader did to me," I say and I see the look of disbelief in his eye before his hand goes to his throat and that cold rage burns as I hold it tight. "Do you think I'm not capable of the things he was?"

"Then do it," he says, my fist closing around his throat. "If it's revenge you want take it, I won't stop you."

"Only one of us is leaving this planet alive," I tell him, even if every moral my father instilled in me screams against killing a man who is not fighting.

"Then why haven't you killed me yet?" he asks but just as I step forward with my saber in hand I feel it and realise the true enemy that's followed me isn't Boba Fett.

It's the Empire.

Slowly I turn my head back towards Boba, the memory of betrayal haunting me now and my saber hand's shaking as he puts his hands up "I didn't-"

Without warning I throw him to the ground and my saber is at his neck as I curse "You fucking traitor."

He knows there is nothing he could say for me to believe him and instead tells me "It's time to put your armour back on princess, we're in for a fight."

I look up at Din who stands there watching the Imperial ships entering the atmosphere "Kyra the kid-"

"The kid is safe," I promise Din and withdraw my saber and abandon Boba on the ground to go to him. "If it's Gideon we have the advantage you hear me?" 

"How?" he asks me. "It's the two of us against the Empire."

I look back at Boba on the ground and Fennec getting to her feet, if they didn't bring them here then they'll have no hesitation killing them. "No, it's not." I take his helmet in my hands as I tell him "We fight, the child is as safe as he can be up on that stone. Get your weapons, we aren't running."

"This is the way," he says and a shadow of a smile plays at my lips.

"This is the way."

I let him go with a press of my lips to his beskar cheek knowing damn well Boba's watching and march to his ship to get my armour. I navigate the familiar interior quickly to get to the storage compartment and much to my equal surprise and satisfaction find my biometric fingerprint still logged and draw a sharp breath as the compartment opens.

My armour as promised sits there, painted blood red and still coated in the ashes of Mandalore. 

For just a moment I still feel the rubble crushing me, I can still see the bodies of my people turned to dust after the bombing. I can still feel the ash in my lungs as my hand reached out through the rubble, red with radiation burns. I wanted to die and yet I couldn't help but fight for my life as the darkness closed in on me.

I can still feel Boba taking my hand and pulling me out. 

The sound of gunshots pulls me back and I take the painted beskar forged for my body, a lightweight unconventional design perfect for a Jedi. It's all muscle memory as I arm myself with it, the slimline armoured top that wraps around my collarbones leaving my arms bare, the red arm bands in substitute of pauldrons for the sake of mobility, my left bearing the symbol of the Jedi and the right my family's crest. The gauntlets attached to my fingerless red sleeves more lightweight than the typical Mandalorian's, the same with the rest of my armour. Boba brought all of it, not just the beskar but the rest of it I couldn't bear to touch after I'd stripped it from my body and so I make quick work of it, discarding my of Jedi styled clothes in favour of my complete armour since I doubt I'll get another chance to retake it.

Finally I hold the helmet in my hand and for the first time since the purge put it on and ready myself, transferring my saber to my armours utility belt that's still armed with my old blaster and make sure to put the kids ball in one of the pockets.

It feels right as I step out of the ship looking through a visor and raise my blaster to take out the nearby stormtroopers and feel Din's head snaps towards me at the sound of the shots and I can feel it, awe, and then I feel the fear of the stormtroopers as I ignite my saber.

They all come to a halt with their guns raised at me, shaking in their armour as I tilt my head to the side and the moment I raise my hand they're running back to their ship, the landing platform still lowered as they try to retreat and with a single hand, feeling the strength of the force more than I have in years, I bring the ship to a halt as they try to lift off. It's as I tap into the true richness of the force here on Tython I realise indeed the stories are true and I throw the ship into a nearby cliff face with a strength I've never wielded before.

The wreckage hits the ground with injured troopers straining for their weapons and I look back to see Boba and Din both standing there in a state of awe.

"Kill them!" I order and they quickly jump into action, gunning down the troopers on board the wreckage and I move past the bodies to get to the remains of the cockpit, still intact enough for me to make contact with their commander and know in my gut who it is. 

"This is Kyra Kryze," I say, ready to take him out. "You're troopers are dead Gideon."

"That may be, but not even you and your bounty hunters can save the child from me," he says and I hear Din yelling for me.

"Kyra!"

I emerge to see three more ships lowering onto the planet and just as I raise my hand I hear rockets, but not from the ship. I look back to see Boba standing there in his own armour now and watch as his rocket hits one of the ships which crashes down into the other, both burning wreckage now in the sky.

I feel Din's hand on my arm, tasting the bitterness in my mouth as I look at Boba and know he didn't bring the Empire here. 

"See princess, I did tell you," Boba says and I could kill him for the I told you so alone. 

"And like I told you, I'm not weak," I spit at him and then realise that was his intention all along, to rile me up. 

"You never were," he says and frustrated I look away from him back to Din who stands behind me with a gentle hand holding me in place, maker knows the only thing giving me peace right now.

"What's the plan general?" Din asks me, Boba and Fennec listening as I look at the final ship landing, but my gut tells me there are far more where it came from and we need to take them out.

"Kill them, no matter how many waves come we eliminate them," I decide, knowing the child is safe up on that rock. "If we don't Gideon will just send them after us again."

"Gideon?" Boba repeats, having missed that part when he was attacking Din. "Moff Gideon? I thought he was dead."

"So did we but you'd know that if you were actually helping me on Tatooine instead of stabbing someone," I retort and feel Din squeeze my arm to bring my back, knowing I need to be focused right now, and ask him "On Navarro what type of strength did he have?"

"Enough that he almost killed all of us," he answers and tells me "We aren't making it out unscathed."

"Retreatings no good if he can take us out with his ship, we're better to hold defensive positions until an opportunity presents itself," I say as Fennec reloads her rifle, remembering the Hoth situation. "We don't know what type of resources he's got and I'm not risking putting the kid in his sights."

"Call for backup?" Din asks knowing the connections I've got but none that can get here in time.

"We are the backup," Boba says and reminds me "We've faced worse than a few stormtroopers princess."

"This isn't right," I say, my gut screaming it at me. "It's too easy, if Gideon knows you're here he'd be sending more firepower than this."

It would be why Gideon waited so long to attack, Boba Fett would be one of the few people in this galaxy he would fear and rightfully so, which makes no sense he's sending mere ships of troopers against two of the most capable killers in the galaxy.

"Then let's take them out," Boba says as the ship lands and the four of us stand there ready to fight as the landing platform lowers and I tilt my head at the black of their armour.

Death troopers.

And there it is.

"Take cover," I order before they open fire and each and every movement of my saber is muscle memory led by the force, my father having been relentless in this particular training after the Clones wiped out most of the Jedi in order 66. He wasn't going to let me fall to a group of troopers with blasters.

Their armour is resistant enough the blasts reflected back don't kill them and hear their commander order "Kill the Jedi!"

And so I use the force to leap over head just as they roll grenades my way and cut through three troopers from behind as Din, Boba and Fennec fire on them from defensive positions but it's then as I look up to the stone my blood runs cold realising this is just a distraction.

Troopers unlike any I've ever seen descend towards the stone and just as I run forward I'm thrown to the ground by a missile that blows the Razor Crest to ashes. 

My ears ring as I take in the burning wreckage and feel Din pulling me to my feet, covering me from the Death Troopers fire as he pulls me back behind cover, checking me over to make sure I'm alright before quaking "The kid-"

"I've got him, cover me," I tell him and use my jetpack for the first time in years as I take off dodging the heavy fire from the Death Troopers to get to the stone only to begin losing altitude halfway as the broken down fuel runs out and I hit the ground running, reaching the stone at the same moment they do and I'm met with an onslaught from blaster cannons that I fight through only for the force shield to come down.

"No!" I yell out as I'm thrown into one of the pillars with a force I've never felt before by one of the troopers and get to my feet only to be faced with six of them, big hulking forces of metal standing between me and the child who looks at me with fear in his eyes.

They fire upon me, no doubt with programmed orders from Gideon to eliminate me personally. Reflecting the heavy fire I cut through the chest of the one who threw me and cut down the next through the middle only to be grabbed by the throat with a crushing pressure by another and raised up to see the child being taken and kick my feet against the troopers face, severing the hand holding my throat before cutting through its neck along with anothers before driving my saber through the chest of the fifth.

I rebound off the ground as the final trooper lifts off with the child and I swear I can hear Din calling my name, but just as I go to jump from the stone to take down the final trooper I see it far too late, the burning missile locked right onto me, and in the second before it impacts I raise my saber in a pure final instinct and there's a flash of blue.

Then nothing.

~

Din

The moment the missile enters the atmosphere I've abandoned my defensive position to run to her as if I have a chance in hell of making it there, there's flashes of yellow as she cuts through the troopers and I'm screaming her name into an empty void and she looks up the moment before it impacts. There's a flash of blue as the forceshield ignites only for the missile to blow the stone temple to nothing not even a second later.

The explosion causes me to fall back and I'm on my knees as I look up at the smouldering ruins, the world itself coming to a standstill as I grasp my blaster between my fingers, in one single moment my entire world gone.

So many moments I'd accepted my own death and I was never afraid, but that was until her and the child came along and suddenly I had everything to lose.

And now I've lost just that, my child, my riduur, my everything.

That is until I feel Boba Fett pulling me to my feet telling me "She's hard to kill, get up there and I'll follow the bastards."

"Come on," Fennec says pulling me along as if there would even be anything left of her after what that same missile did to the Razor Crest. "He'll follow the trooper, she's a Jedi isn't she?" Numbly I nod as she forces me to walk. "Then there's a chance."

"The kid-"

"He's following the kid," she repeats as we make our way up the mountain. "You can't save him but there's still a chance for her."

I'm sick to my stomach at the thought of what I'll find, her body blown to pieces or nothing at all, but as my weak knees take me up the hill they all but give out at the sight of her red figure face down in the ruins and I run forward, dropping to my knees as I take her in my arms.

"Kyra?" I quake as I hold her limp body, armour blackened from the impact and skin scorched but it's as I pull her helmet off and find blood running from her ears and nose I can't breathe. "Cyar'ika?"

Despite the heat radiating from the burns her body's cold, my thermal imaging unable to get a clear reading with the injuries and I'm cradling her head in my hand as I check her vital signs,  finding a pulse, drawing a shaking breath as I feel it beneath my fingers. She should be ashes, but I've seen the child perform even greater miracles than this.

"Boba's on their tail," Fennec tells me. "He's locked onto the trooper."

"No!" I panic, stammering. "I don't want the child hurt!"

They're both alive, but they won't be for long.

"Abort pursuit, disengage!" Fennec orders. "Do not harm the child."

"Copy, I'll do a loose follow, see where they're headed." There's a pause before he asks "Is she alive?"

"Mando," Fennec says, unable to quite look at us as she asks "Is she alive?" I give a single weak nod and she confirms "She's alive but barely. Burns covering her body from the blast and severe head trauma, unconscious."

I'd never been truly afraid until right now as I hold her limp body in my arms, appearing dead in every way except for the slight pulse beneath my fingers and the slow rise and fall of her chest beneath the beskar but it's not strong enough.

The child is gone, I can't lose her with him.

"I can't do this alone," I tell her in Mando'a. I'd promised that I'd never let the Empire hurt her again and I broke that promise. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry I failed you. I failed both of you."

Her red hair is between my fingers, warmth seeping from her skull as I clutch her body to mine, trying to convince myself she's still alive, that she still has a chance.

"They're back," I hear Fett say over the com as I listen for her breath but can barely find it.

"Who?" Fennec asks as she comes over, kneeling down to take a look at her.

"The Empire," he answers, telling her what I already know. "They're back."

"That can't be, the Empire is under the jurisdiction of the New Republic."

"This isn't a spice dream, I can see the Imperial cruiser with my own eyes."

The issue of a few rogue warlords is entirely different to an armed and operational Imperial Cruiser. For a moment I hope that revelation would be enough to wake her up, but she's still out cold in my arms. 

"Fennec she needs help," I say quickly, unable to keep my voice from breaking.

"Boba doesn't have any plans on letting her die," Fennec says and I don't know if that makes me feel better or worse as she speaks into the com. "Get back down here, she needs medical treatment."

"I'm coming down."

"Come on," Fennec says and I lift her up, taking care to keep her head still and Fennec takes her helmet as we descend back down the mountain with only one way off this planet.

Despite the desperation I've heard enough to not trust him, knowing he turned her over to the Empire once before and I'll die before letting it happen again and when we approach his ship and he takes a step towards her I draw my blaster on him from beneath her legs "Touch her and you're dead."

"She isn't dead yet but she will be and if you kill me and try to steal my ship you won't get very far without my biometrics," he says, having anticipated this. "Do you want her to die?"

"She'd rather die before being given to the Empire," I say, knowing she'd never forgive me if I let Gideon get his hands on her. "And I'll die before letting them harm her."

"I didn't dig her out of the damn rubble on Mandalore to watch her die now," he mutters and my blaster hand shakes as he marches forward and puts a hand on her head, I only allow it when I see how his shakes as much as mine. "She needs a bacta tank."

"It's the outer rims," Fennec says. "Where-"

"I know a place," Fett says and speaks to me. "Something tells me neither of us are getting past the outer rims without being arrested by the New Republic. I can take her somewhere she'll be safe."

"Where?"

"Cloud city," he says, the name only vague to me. "Run by one of her rebel friends, Calrissian."

I look down at her knowing we don't have any time for questions but I still can't trust Boba Fett "You try anything-"

"Oh trust me she'll beat you to killing me when she wakes up when she realises where I've taken her," he assures me. "But neither of us are letting her die."

"Mando, if you want her to live you have to trust us," Fennec says and with no choice I head on board the ship, hardly even registering as Boba Fett enters with the beskar spear, all that's left of the Razor Crest.

The landing dock closes and they head into the cockpit without another word, leaving me there in the hold alone with her and it's then the chill truly settles into my bones. 

Only an hour ago we were in the cockpit of the Razorcrest, watching her holding Grogu as she told us the words we'd never heard before her, that she loves us. Words I'd never heard until she came into my life and made me realise I was something that could be loved. The light of my life, the only thing that truly mattered, her and the child, I had my entire future in the palm of my hand and now it's all gone.

I feel the tears in my eyes as I cradle her head and feel the dry blood in her hair, remembering in horror that she has a family outside of the child and I, that I'll have to tell them how she died while I stood helpless. 

"Come on cyar'ika," I plead with her, without her and the child there is nothing left to live for. I don't know how I ever lived without their love, a love that made me feel human for the first time since I was a child, a love I can never live without again. "Wake up, please."

But her body only grows colder, her skin blackened from the blast of the missile, wounds that a bacta tank can heal but I remember too well the head trauma that would have killed me if not for IG-11. My hand rests over her pulse, feeling it only growing weaker, her breathing slowing.

"Stay with me," I whisper, shaking as I hold her body and realise her chest is hardly rising. "Kyra?" The colour is gone from her cheeks, her skin turning a shade of grey and I'm yelling out "How long do we have left!"

Boba Fett comes down, helmetless now and looks upon her with an unreadable face "Less than an hour."

"We don't have that long," I insist. "Is there bacta-"

"The Hutts raided it for medicine and credits while I was in the Sarlacc," he answers and gives what could almost be called an attempt at assurance. "I've seen her in worse shape than this, she's tough, too stubborn to die like this that's for certain."

"Well she is dying!" I snap, slowly losing it with every missed beat of her pulse. "Isn't there anywhere closer?"

"If the Empires back then Cloud City is the only place I know for certain won't be doing business with them," he says and I look down at her. "Calrissian is a good enough man he wouldn't turn her away."

"Can you get a transmission to Leia?" I ask him knowing that she'd want her family to be there if she doesn't make it and he seems surprised by my request.

He scoffs "She's told you about that lot?"

"They're her family," I say and he just shakes his head. "They deserve to be there if she doesn't make it." It's then I remember where I'd heard of Cloud City from, Solo's transmission after we were attacked on Tatooine. "Can you contact Solo on the Millenium Falcon, he should be at Cloud City."

He looks at me more carefully now "You've met Solo and all the rest?"

"I know her family and she'd want them there," I say, unable to understand the questions and having no patience for them. "Can you contact them or not?"

He's silent for a moment in contemplation before saying "It's best I don't or they'll try to shoot me down."

I stare at him now incredulously at how he can be thinking about himself right now "Not if they know she's on board."

"Let's just say Solo and I have some history and they won't believe she let me live long enough to be in this situation," he says and despite my desperation I can't blame them if they know what I do. "We'll be there soon, I don't know what she's told you-"

"She'd told me enough," I say sharply, not caring for conversation right now.

He nods to himself before saying "We both love her Mandalorian, she isn't dying on my watch." He steps forward and I pull her closer to me, not wanting a man who hurt her and is comfortable enough laying hands on her how I just saw to touch her. "She's survived worse than this, if you've spent even a night with her you'd know that." 

The mention of her nightmares has me shaking at the thoughts of just what she's endured and the revelation I learned on that damned planet, that she was pregnant with this man's child and lost it in torture due to his betrayal.

"If you loved her you wouldn't have betrayed her," I say knowing the man he is, that we aren't so dissimilar. Knowing the lives men like him and I lead and just what she is in comparison to all that bloodshed. "If you loved her you would have died before letting the Empire lay one hand on her."

"Vader promised me if I got her to become his apprentice he would spare her," he reveals to me. "The moment she landed on that planet she'd sealed her fate, I'd tried to keep her away but the moment her ship was reported I went there to protect her and struck the deal. Her precious family were about to die and I wasn't going to let her suffer the same fate."

"And so you turned her over for torture with a blaster at her back," I say remembering the words she told me and feel my own blaster beside me on the floor within reach, checking her pulse and finding it even weaker.

"I did," he says and eyes me as he says "It's clear you haven't known her very long so let me enlighten you. I'd been by her side since she was nineteen, I watched her take back Mandalore from the Empire and I watched her lose it because she was too damn stubborn to realise her precious rebellion would spit her right back out the moment they were finished with her." I'm silent now, remembering Chandrila. "And from what I've heard that's exactly what they did, charged her as a war criminal and left her to Moff Gideon on Tatooine."

My head snaps back towards him at the mention of that night "You left me for dead after beating Cobb Vanth within an inch of his life trying to find us."

"You would have done the same if you'd seen me first," he dismisses and goes on. "I've been dealing with the aftermath of her decisions for almost a decade now. She's as tough as they come but she's got a weak heart. She's pretty enough to make any man forget themselves but there's only so many times you can stop her from ruining herself in the name of being a hero. Hell I pulled her out of the ruins of Mandalore after she tried killing herself when she had to live with the consequences of her decisions. She's her own worst enemy and I'm warning you now Mandalorian no man escapes from her unscathed."

The length of their history makes me still and I begin to realise there's a reason she didn't kill him on sight and with her dying in her arms the last thing I want is to doubt where her heart lies. 

"I know her past," I say stiffly, but it's never scared me until now. 

"Do you?" he questions. "Are you aware you've been shacking up with a suicidal sadist who's spent her enter life pretending to be something she's not? Don't let her pretty face fool you, she's a cruel woman who let me spend five years believing she'd rid herself of our child out of pure spite before leaving me for dead."

His words do nothing but make me want to reach for my blaster "Do you love her or hate her, make up your mind." 

"Love and hate, it's all the same to her as you'll come to learn," he says and I look down at her face, unable to see anything but the woman I love. "She'll want to kill me when she eventually wakes up but she won't do it. She can't. The last night together before she left me for dead she spent beating me until she turned to words to try to provoke me into hurting her to fulfil whatever sick satisfaction it gave her before pushing me into bed. She's a twisted woman, always has been. Whatever she's told you I did to her it was nothing she didn't allow, hell you saw it. She has a way of bringing out the worst in a man, forcing it to the surface."

"Why are you telling me this?" I stammer, panicking the weaker her breathing grows while he stands there like she's not dying.

"So you can run before it's too late."

I scoff now, realising what his play is "So you can have her?"

"I've loved her through all of these years, and no matter what we always found our way back to one another," he tells me and stops before heading back to the cockpit. "You seem like a good man, you love her, but she isn't the woman you think she is."

With her dying in my arms his words change nothing. "We'll see."

He's almost amused "You will see."

He leaves us and I look down at her, the woman I love, a woman who in so many ways is still as much of a mystery to me as she was when I first laid eyes on her. Whoever she was, I saw glimpses of her today that left me shocked, glimpses I'd never seen before that leave me wondering how much of the truth this man is telling me.

But it doesn't matter, not now, not when I could lose her. I trust her with my life, with the child's life, and that is more important than anything that he could ever tell me, not when I have my own past I try to forget. Not when our child is gone and I need her with me to take him back.

True desperation takes hold of me as her lips turn a shade of blue and I hold her face, afraid to move her without knowing the extent of her head injury, clinging to the faint beat of her pulse that is the only thing keeping the last shred of my sanity from breaking.

"Wake up," I plead with her, if there is one thing Fett is right about it's that she's too stubborn to die like this at the Empire's hands. "We need to protect Grogu, he needs us." Still she lays unconscious and my voice breaks "I need you."

When I was dying I had her and the child by my side, I would have died in peace having felt her lips on mine knowing there was someone to mourn me, to raise the child. I may be here, but she would not die in peace knowing the child is in danger, knowing he was taken by the Empire as she was when she was just a child. 

As I died the only regret I had was that I had not had more time with her, I would have died a happy man if she opened her eyes to look upon my face when she kissed me and so with shaking hands I lift my helmet now and put it aside to look upon her with my own eyes. If she were to wake now I would have no regrets if only to feel her warm and alive in my arms.

"I love you," I tell her, knowing I might never get to say them again. "I can't- I can't go back to how it was before you and the kid. I can't." I'm choking back a sob as I fight tears, something I didn't realise I was still capable of. "Please, stay with me. Stay with me cyar'ika."

I kiss her cold head, feeling my tears wet her skin as I once felt hers wet mine. I thought I was gone, but she saved me.

I might not be able to wield the force to bring her back from the brink of death, I may be just a man begging the woman he loves to stay with him but that is enough. It has to be.

I'm not letting her die.

[starwarsficnetwork]

Din Djarin Writers

Banner by the lovely @theywhowriteandknowthings

Writers! Tag us or use the hashtag #starwarsficnetwork to be featured! But please have your age/age range in your bio. If you’d like to be removed, send us a dm!

*will be updated regularly*

Listed in alphabetical order:

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@againstacecilia

@atinylittlepain

@babygirlispunk

@beecastle

@beskarandblasters

@concussed-to-pieces

@cool-iguana

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[the-force-awakens]

Thank you for the recommendation!! It's hard finding Poe centric blogs on here.

I was gonna dm you a question about your gifs but tumblr is telling me I can't because we're not mutuals (rude tumblr) so I'll ask you here. Would you be okay with me using one of your gifts for my header? /nf. I promise I'd give you credits if you were comfortable with it, but it's totally fine if you're not.

I also just posted my first bit of writing for Poe and I'm kinda nervous.

I feel like I just keep rambling on in your inbox about whatever thought lands in my head (pls lmk if it gets annoying)

- @happybeepshere

It is, it's very hard! It kind of baffles me when he's one of the main characters of the saga, but you just....can't seem to ever find anything focused on him (or solely him, I'm all for ships but it's definitely hard to find nonromantic creations for him). That said, here's some blogs that love on him (they're all multifandom tho! so keep it in mind): @leiakenobi, @nowritingonthewall, @cal-kestis, @wildfirewildflower, @aimmyarrowshigh, @ladybokatankryze, @karmas, and i'd be remiss not to mention @hermitmoss who is also my qp partner, they don't often post about the sequels (mostly swtor and pt) but they've made me some lovely poe graphics & fics in the past <3 And these blogs aren't active anymore but I occasionally peruse @dailypoedameron (which i actually used to mod way back when i was a teenager, good fucking god I've been down bad for this man for so much of my life) and @dailydameron. You'll mostly find tfa-era stuff and a trickle of immediately pre-release tlj stuff on those <3

I'm sure there's plenty more blogs out there but I'm uh. a hermit.

Yes, I'd be fine with that! It always makes me happy to see people using my gifs for their headers! My only caveat is I do request that gifs made specifically for someone else (i.e gifsets made for birthdays! it'll say in the caption) not be used, but everything else? up for grabs. I appreciate you asking for permission!

Oh no, definitely not annoying. I've had tumbleweeds going on in my askbox for literally ages, I've missed having people rambling away in my inbox! Especially, you know, when it happens to be about the literal light of my life.

[yelena-bellova]

Thank you! I'm looking for fandom blogs, GOT, Star Wars, Marvel, Celebrities, Queer Content (this one would be really cool), etc! 👀 Love your blog!!

Sure! As far as GOT and queer blogs, I don’t belong to either so I’m not very helpful there, but some of the blogs I follow are multi-fandom/belong to queer individuals!

Marvel: @womenofmcu @coulsons-band @marv-el-spot

Star Wars: (some are general, some are character specific): @calkestis @dindjarindiaries @dilf-din @allthingskenobi @anakinobiwans @wildfirewildflower @sabines-wrens @mandobi @dameronology @roguecassians @dindaddjarin @rebel-ahsoka

Here’s a couple multi-fandom blogs I follow and interact with quite a bit who are absolutely lovely 💞 @lacebird @theresebelivet @yenfers

As far as celebrities, if you tell me which ones you’re interested in, I can def recommend some blogs!

[galacticwildfire]

My ao3 is wildfirewildflower and my wattpad is wildfirexwildflower

Either one of those is better to follow than here for fanfic purposes since I always post new updates there first and that way you can be notified of new chapters since tumblr doesn't like taglists or oc stories

i'm working on a pinterest too since I love moodboards, I also have a youtube where I post edits and occasional fanfiction trailers that is also wildfirewildflower

To help connect more OC fanfiction creators REBLOG this post with your other platforms

AO3, Wattpad, Pinterest, etc.

[acyplakov]

#WildfireWildflower #LanaDelRey #Music ❤️🎶 https://www.instagram.com/p/ChJAQanuexP/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[powerderp]

Me, well I like the fire too.

As a fire poppy

seed I watch as it all burns;

I will yet blossom.

[galacticwildfire]

found.

Twenty Three

Pairing: Kenobi!oc x Din Djarin

Summary: Satine and Obi-wan’s daughter fought in the war against the Empire and lost her faith when she lost Mandalore. Until she found him. A lone Mandalorian searching for a Jedi.

Warnings: TW for torture, severe ptsd, mention of past miscarriage and intimate violence in the flashback. This one gets pretty dark in places and will for the next few chapters. But there is fluff and some smut amongst the angst.

Word Count: 7.8k

A/N: okay this was originally 10k words so I cut it off at the start of the interaction which means next chapter is going to be the definition of female rage and is already half written. My apologies for making everyone wait so long but it is back and next chapter will follow soon where shit will truly hit the fan.

ALSO I have gone back and rewritten from chapter 20 onwards, everything is the same but just fleshed out with more smut so enjoy

~

~

~

I was heaving on the floor of the cell on Cloud City, blood surrounding me, screaming into oblivion as if the pain in my heart was enough to kill me, to spare me. Screaming in rage in the slightest chance he could hear me. My bloodstained hand hovered over the burning brand on my ribs, heat pulsing from it but my mind, it was my mind Vader had picked apart.

Desperately I threw myself against the door of the cell as if I could break it down, as if my pain alone could give me the strength of Vader but I was no Skywalker. I was a broken girl with a planet of glass for a home and no one to protect me. 

In my fit of madness it felt as if the world was ending and with each slam of my body against the metal I heard the bombs dropping over Mandalore, felt them shake the ground beneath me and waited for the burning world to collapse down upon me and this time finally end me so I could die with my people. 

After what could have been minutes or hours I finally heard the door's seal break from the outside and raised a bruised and broken hand, reaching for what I thought would be Vader's saber to die if only to lay one strike down upon him, but instead I found her.

"Leia?" I gasped out and collapsed then and there as she took me in her arms. There was one person left to protect me after all."I didn't know- I didn't-"

What part I meant, I didn't know. All I knew was I'd been betrayed.

"Kyra?" she whispered in horror clutching me to her until I cried out from the contact to the burning brand, blood from my hands now staining her white suit. "What did Vader do to you?"

I'm gasping as I wake, struggling against the weight of Din in the tiny sleeping compartment, not realising where I am as I break it open and throw myself down onto the floor of the ship, looking up at the lights but no shocks rack my body and no blows come. Terrified tears stain my cheeks as he gets on his knees in front of me, repeating my name cautiously until he reaches for my face to bring me back to where we truly are.

"Kyra?" his voice quakes as I struggle for breath, hand reaching for my throat still gasping for breath and he pulls me into his arms, my head in the crook of his neck as I grasp his cloak for something to hold onto, to convince my mind and body that I'm safe. "You're safe, you're safe cyar'ika."

His voice trembles and I'm shaking violently as he rocks me in his arms and I don't know how long we're there on the floor until I can bear to look at him and he holds my face in his hands, not needing to ask, knowing enough by now to know what haunts me.

"You're safe," he tells me again, thumb caressing my cheek as I look down at my hands, finding them clean of blood even if I can still feel its warmth. "Kyra?" I shake my head, inching away from his touch. "Kyra, it's me, you're safe."

And yet my mind is twisted and its wires damaged enough I still sit there for moments more trying to connect what I see with the fear in my mind, trying to rationalise it, trying to tell myself there is no danger and therefore I should not be afraid.

On undamaged minds that may work, but not mine.

"Din?" I finally whisper, my mind finally equating his touch with calm, with safety, and I let him take me back into his arms as slowly I ground myself in him. 

"I've got you cyar'ika," he promises me, trying to hide how deeply I've scared him. "I've got you. I'll never let anyone hurt you again."

I wish I could believe that, for just a moment I almost do.

"The Empire," I begin as he takes my shaking hands in his own. "They aren't gone."

He slowly shakes his head. "No, they aren't."

I nod numbly and tell him "I want them gone, for good, no matter the cost."

A cost the Republic is not prepared to face, the cost of mercy.

But they never showed me mercy.

"We will start with Moff Gideon," he tells me, giving me something to hold onto as he rests his forehead on mine. "We'll kill anyone we have to. We'll do whatever it takes no matter the cost to keep you and the child safe."

His promise echoes through the empty chambers of my broken mind, reminding me of my purpose. To keep the child safe. Exhausted and wanting to forget everything but his touch I shut my eyes and do what I've always done, what I did when I was just a child captured by the empire, tell myself it was just a bad dream, a bad dream that never happened.

But it did.

~

I wake to the child nuzzling into me, still resting in Din's arms in the middle of the ship with a blanket wrapped over me, everything numb. But for the child's sake I take him in my arms and try to smile, and feel in the child a pain not so dissimilar to my own, a dark pain, a fear. But even more blinding is his compassion as he reaches out to try to ease my own pain, the compassion that makes a Jedi.

I close my eyes and feel flashes of sabers and blasters and hold the child a little tighter, feeling something is terribly wrong, or will be. Something more immediate than the nightmares that haunt us both.

"Kyra?" I hear Din ask, more than in tune with my expressions by now. "What is it?"

"Can you take the kid up to the cockpit, I need to meditate," I tell him and feel surprise at my own words, despite being a Jedi I could count the number of times I've meditated in the last year on one hand despite how devoted I once was to it.

"Alright," he says uncomfortably, not wanting to leave me alone, but somehow pulls me out of that darkness with one silly question "Is that a Jedi thing?"

"Yeah," I say, laughing softly as I wipe tears from the corners of my eyes. "Yeah it is."

Before he lets me go he squeezes my hand tight and says "If you need me, get me."

He has never treated me like glass, and now is no exception despite how badly I know he doesn't want to let me out of his sight. I'm thankful for it.

"I will," I tell him and watch as he lifts the kid up, able to find some joy in the sight before they disappear up into the cockpit and I'm left to contemplate what these dreams coming back mean.

I cannot remember the last time my nightmares had me in such a state. I remember Lando's concern when I'd wake in similar states not knowing where I was and trying to escape, how he'd call Leia trying to get me help with little luck. It is the first time Din has truly seen it, I know it's left him more shaken than he'd admit.

The closer we get to the planet the worse this feeling of doom is, perhaps it's being in close proximity to a place the force is so strong while in such a state, perhaps it's a warning.

Either way, there is a nagging paranoia in me that from experience can only be two things. The Empire and Boba Fett and so I try to rationalise before I jump to conclusions.

If Boba's been living in poverty on Tatooine as all but a ghost for this many years it is safe to say he wouldn't even have the capabilities to follow us, but still, I'm remembering parts of dreams I thought I'd long blacked out and so I force myself to sit in a meditative state to uncover what they are trying to tell me. Luke would probably drop dead from shock if he could actually see me meditating to work through my problems. I hardly remember the girl who managed to train Luke to be the Jedi he is, it's past time I found her again.

Yet my subconscious forces me to remember many events I'd rather not touch until it takes me to those early days with Boba, back before I ever feared him. When I'd found him weeks after my parents deaths, a man who captivated me as no other had, hired help I was stupid enough to not let go. I was one of the only people to ever tell him no when he refused my offer to join me, and most certainly the only one to live, and sure enough we found a price he accepted. 

In the early days there was little fighting between us, it was something built on mystery and a curiosity to learn more of one another, and then a deep respect. Captivating by this stranger in a time when I found myself growing ever more estranged from my aunt for my methods that she found either too pacifist or too extreme, her faith in me was little despite the strong front we put on. I found myself leaning on him as a trusted advisor to guide me through troubles with Mandalorians who resembled him more than myself, even if he was a clone to all others he still upheld our creed and significantly more credits than he did before he met me.

Long days on Mandalore fighting and mourning, days when I found myself struggling to hold what power I could and was somehow under the illusion I had power over this deadly man and mistakenly thought I was the one to seduce him in the dangerous game we played. I don't know how many times he asked me if it was what I wanted that very first time, leaving no room for me to regret it when he warned me of exactly what he was before he ever touched me. I all but begged him too, wanting to feel like a woman instead of a broken child, but I was too young to even begin to comprehend what I was getting myself into. 

But at nineteen you truly do believe you are sure of what you want, and he knew he was the only man I trusted. At some point before it fell apart that very first time he truly respected me when he watched me wield the Darksaber to defeat men twice my age and size who challenged me for it. Like that one of Vizsla who I sent back into exile after I defeated him in combat before all the clans for the crimes he had committed against my mother alongside Death Watch that final time when I was sixteen and struck Maul down.

That was the moment I gained the respect of the people, a respect Boba told me I'd thrown away by leaving Bo-Katan as regent to return to the Rebellion. 

Little did I know it was that very moment I returned to the Rebellion I'd lost whatever real love was between us. That was the moment we found ourselves on opposite sides of the war as he turned to the Empire to fill his pockets.

Every dark thing inside of me he brought out, and I was powerless to stop him as he turned my rage into something that haunts me to this day. It haunts me when I know at some point Vader put credits in his hand to bring me to him and I wonder for just how long before Cloud City he was trying to seduce me to the Empire's side so I'd go willingly. 

To this day I still don't know what were lies, all I knew was that despite everyone he'd done, he loved me and I him.

"You can claim you're better than me, doing what you do for the greater good, except you're lying," Boba told me that last night together. "You don't care about the greater good or honour, you do what you do because you want revenge. You kill because you like it. You have a cruel streak in you, princess. Deep down you are just as ruthless as I am."

I hated how safe I always felt with him even though I should have been terrified, because he was the only person in the galaxy who I could show the worst of me and he wouldn't even blink an eye. Even on Tatooine when I was Jabba's prisoner. Because the worst of me was only a fraction of the worst of him. "If I'm a killer then what are you? A masochist? A traitor? You are a man without honour Boba Fett."

Those last words struck a nerve. "You can pretend all you want. But you aren't a good person. You aren't a hero." He had me backed up against the wall of his room that Jabba's guards had thrown me into as a personal thank you for giving him Han. Jabba's gift to Boba. "Do you really think they'll love you once they know everything you've done?" His hand was around my throat as burning tears slipped down my cheeks. Not to choke me, but to keep me still as he revealed "Do they know you're the one who led me straight to Solo? That I incinerated your friend Skywalkers aunt and uncle?" I shook beneath his touch. "That you knew all along he was Vaders and lied to him, to everyone." But it was when his blaster pressed against my exposed stomach I knew that he knew. "To me."

"I lied to you?" I repeated dangerously, now in pure disbelief at the words I heard. "I?" I pushed him off of me then, my voice raising to a scream of pure rage as I shoved him again into the opposite wall. "I lied to you? All you ever did was lie!" 

"I never lied to you princess, I told you exactly what I was," he said as my hand itched for a blade. "You just never wanted to hear the truth." He stepped back towards me, telling me the words that were the truth. "You are not an innocent, you are not a victim, you are the one who never listened when I warned you of what I was and what would happen."

It was the truth, and yet it didn't make him an innocent either.

"Look at it," I told and slapped him across the face before I grabbed it and pulled his eyes down to the brand Vader left on me. "He left it just for you." He shut his eyed like a coward as I hissed. "Turns out he doesn't like his little bitch fucking his targets."

He pulls my hand back, and I'm smiling knowing I've hit him where it hurts. "I'm no one's bitch."

"You were mine," I remind him, knowing he was once my hired blaster. "A shiny bar of beskar and you're owned by anyone."

He grabbed me by the chain around my throat. "And you're the one in chains now princess so tell me how that's worked out for you? No home, no family, no one to love you that won't soon be dead. No one but me."

I slammed him back into the wall, reaching for any weapon within reach I could get my hands on "You fuck-"

"Hate me all you want princess, you love me."

"No," I lied, hating myself because it was true. "How can I after you fucking left me to Vader, after you betrayed me!"

"No more than you betrayed me," he said as if I had a choice, as if I wasn't screaming on the floor of that cell on Cloud City and it was then as I reached for his blaster he grabbed me again, throwing me back and pinning my wrists to the wall. "You took my chance to be a good man from me, to be a father-"

Tears burned in my eyes and I realised the greatest cruelty I could inflict upon him was to let him believe whatever Vader told him and I stopped fighting then as I looked him in the eye. "And I would do it again."

He held me by the throat and I watched seething as he dragged his blaster along my exposed body, the same blaster he'd used countless times to do such unholy things to me, and I didn't look away as he pressed it into my stomach.

He was deadly silent, finger over the trigger as I searched his cold eyes and felt the things he never learned to hide from a person like me. 

"I know you Boba Fett," I told him, I might have been the only person in the galaxy who did. "I know you love me." Finally his fist closed around my throat to prove to both of us that he didn't but I hardly blinked as he held it tight, enough to constrict my airways but still unable to bring himself to truly hurt me and somehow that made it worse. "Don't be a coward now, you could choke me to death and still would never come close to inflicting the pain Vader did."

"You were my target," he told me, digging the knife deeper with his words since he couldn't bring himself to do it physically. "From the moment you returned to the rebellion. You were my target when I dug you out of the rubble on Mandalore, every night together was all to get the information I was paid to bring to Vader, but you knew that didn't you?" I didn't give him an answer, I couldn't even give myself one as he tapped his blaster against my cheek. "And you let me do it because you loved me."

I could have used the force to pull the trigger, to end this as I begged him to do half a year before. For my blood to be on his hands, the blood of the woman he loved. It would have been cruelly poetic, but I was too bitter to die before seeing the end of the empire.

"How?" I finally asked him as I searched his heart and mind, finding such strong love twisted with darkness, finding the same in mine own heart and that darkness was what I could not forgive. "How could you do this to someone you love?"

"This was never love," he told me, seeing what I couldn't but his heart- he could not hide it from me, not from a Jedi.

"Liar," I breathed, smiling at the hate in his eyes, his lips hovering just above mine. "If it wasn't we would have killed each other a hundred times over by now."

"Kyra."

I jump at the sound Din's voice, pulled from the meditative state that's reminded me of why I don't meditate. I wanted clarity not pain, and I certainly don't have the time to unravel years of torture before I can figure out what the immediate danger at hand is.

"Are you alright?"

I nod stiffly, composing myself but still Boba's words haunt me amongst much else. 

"I'm just thinking, that's all."

"About the nightmare?" he asks and comes over to me, sitting down in front of where I am and takes my hands in his. "We're raising a child together ner karta, there isn't anything you can't tell me."

But there is. There is so much I haven't been able to speak a word of to anyone. Not even Leia after she found me there a bleeding mess on the floor but she knew. Her and Lando both saw me there, Lando in all these years has never once dared to mention what he saw and Leia... we held each other all through that night, not having to speak a word of what we'd both lost.

"Sometimes I dream of the war," I tell him, not going into detail. "More often than not they turn into nightmares." 

"But not like that," he says and gently presses "All these nights we've spent in the same room, I've never seen you like that."

I swallow hard and tell him just enough "In my nightmare I was trying to break out of a cell and when I woke I didn't know where I was."

He nods slowly, thumb running over the side of my hand, gently calming me but the only interpretation I can find of those dreams is that something is coming and I can't afford to let myself end up trapped and helpless again. I need to heed Boba's words instead of pretending I am not what he knows me to be. I never fought out of the goodness of my heart as a Jedi should, it was a search for justice that quickly turned to revenge. 

The time of pretending I am a peaceful person is over, I've trained Luke and Leia, I did my duty to them in resisting those violent urges to keep them from being tempted by darkness. I will fight darkness until the day I die instead of surrendering to it, but I can't deny my Mandalorian nature.

"My mother Satine, she was the most staunch pacifist in the galaxy," I tell him and realise how little I've told him of her. "She watched Mandalore be destroyed by civil wars before either of us were born, her father was killed during the last of them. I never knew him but he was a follower of the old ways, a warrior. It was him who taught Bo-Katan the way, and her who taught me. It was at the end of these wars your people were exiled to the moons of Mandalore."

"Concordia," he reveals and suddenly it all makes sense. "My people were of Concordia, it was there we lived before the purge."

"And that was the divide that almost got her killed more times than I can count," I tell him while he listens carefully. "She believed that the moment we commit to fighting we've already lost and that was the ideology that kept Mandalore neutral until the Empire decided otherwise and she did her part, playing along in order to protect her people until she couldn't." It's then an old guilt surfaces, a wound Boba would always tear open to be cruel. "All because her daughter was a Jedi. I had worked with the Rebellion for three years at that point, since the last time Death Watch tried to kill her, and so when she surrendered and was taken to Vader Leia and I tried to rescue her. By the time I found her Vader had tortured her to the point her body had all but given out, and her last words to me, the greatest pacifist to ever live, were that Mandalore's fate was in my hands now and to never stop fighting."

He's silent in contemplation of my words until he says "And you've never stopped. Even now you're still fighting the Empire."

"But what if I'm fighting the wrong battle?" I ask him finally, trying to find some meaning in these nightmares. "What if running around the outer rims fighting Imperial remnants is the wrong battle, one I've been fighting since the moment the war ended. What if the battle I should be fighting right now is for Mandalore? What if fighting the Empire to keep ourselves safe isn't enough?"

"Then I'll stand behind you," he swears to me but cautiously asks "What's brought this on?"

"I want Moff Gideon dead, I want my enemies to burn," I confess to him, that violent streak I've tried to hide baring itself. "I don't want to just hide away with Grogu living the reclusive life of a Jedi. I want justice, I want the one thing a Jedi shouldn't which is revenge."

He tilts his head towards me and I can feel the concern as he takes my hand "Then when we kill Moff Gideon we will find other Mandalorians, the fight for Mandalore is not lost unless you say it is."

I look at him and ask a careful question "I know you have the same ruthless streak that I do Din. You're a bounty hunter, I'm a soldier. We're both killers." He's quiet, not knowing where I'm going with this but all I know is that I need him to see the parts of myself I don't know how to love myself, to prove to myself Boba's words aren't true, that there will be no one to love me but him. "We might fight for peace, but that doesn't mean we aren't killers all the same."

"I know what I am," he tells me, voice rough. "Before the child, I was a cold-blooded killer, a bounty hunter, but I thought you hated that."

"No," I say quickly, immediately separating what Din is from what Boba was and realise "I'd be lying to you if I said I ever did. You said that you were never a hero like I was but I was never a hero Din, I never did the things I did for the greater good. I did them because like Ahsoka said, I had my mothers passion for justice but more than that I wanted revenge for the things the Empire had taken for me and to protect what I feared losing. I could never admit it because that is not the way of the Jedi."

"But it is the way of the Mandalorian," he says and I look down at our joined hands. "If you think that for even a moment that seeing that side of you would make me love you less then you're wrong." He lifts my chin back up as he tells me "I only love you more."

And with those words he makes me realise something no one else could in almost ten years, that I don't need a bloody and violent love that leaves me in agony. Not when I have him, a man who knows my past and what comes with it and yet loves me unconditionally. Who has taught me I can love without pain. 

The next thing I know I'm in his arms and he's holding me tight, the cold beskar feeling like home as I tell him "I love you Din Djarin. When I'm with you, somehow everything makes sense."

He chuckles lightly as he tells me "I wish I could say the same but I'm still trying to wrap my head around all this Jedi stuff."

I laugh with him now, the darkness forgotten as I tell him "This is what I mean, you can always pull me out of anything, no matter how caught up I get in my own head."

"Well it's hardly like you don't have anything to worry about," he tells me, always practical in his reasoning and admits to me "Sometimes I swear all I do is worry. Is this what it's like being a parent?"

My smile turns a little sad. "I wouldn't know, but I'm learning." My fingertips run along the edge of his helmet. "And I'm glad to be doing it with you, with a man who understands what it's like to be willing to do anything for those we love, no matter how violent."

He tugs me close as he tells me "Do you really think I fell in love with a peace loving Jedi? I fell in love with a Mandalorian woman who could hand my ass to me on a silver platter."

I laugh against his helmet "You've barely even seen me in a fight yet."

His voice is deep as says "The day I see you in beskar fighting is the day I'll be on my knees begging to make you mine."

My chest tightens at what he's suggesting and I play coy "I'm already yours."

He pulls me into his lap, squeezing my waist as he tells me "Not until I can call you my wife you aren't."

"Din-" I breathe, my hands on his chest plate as he pulls me flush to him and my forehead touches his, wanting it, wanting something I swore to myself I'd never want again but here I am. 

And I'm not afraid anymore.

"I want to kiss you," he murmurs, taking my hand and holding it to his beskar cheek.

"Then kiss me," I say, pressing my lips to the beskar, quite comfortable with the circumstances that come with it "I can-"

"I don't want you to close your eyes," he tells me quickly, and he nervously lifts up his helmet as he would if he was drinking and I gently put a cautious hand on his before I can see anything.

"Are you sure?"

"I am," he says and lifts his helmet enough that I can see the patchiness of his beard, his lips. I take his shaking hand in mine as I bring my lips to his, tracing the outline of his jaw with them, leaving soft kisses in my path.

"I love you," I breathe, letting him feel my words as I kiss him. "All of you, helmet and all."

"And I love you," he says, his voice raw and unmodulated and beautiful.

"I know I'd love to hear more of that voice," I say, running my thumb over his lips.

I can feel his smile. "Yeah?"

"Yeah," I smile back, kissing him softly before pulling his helmet back down. "But only what you're ready to give."

"I want you to see me," he says, but I can feel the conflict behind those words. "The creed I- I know it isn't what I was raised to believe but-"

"You don't have to explain my love," I tell him gently. "I understand, and I love you. You don't need to force yourself to abandon the beliefs you hold or make any decisions until you're sure of them."

"Thank you," he breathes, hands heavy on my body, showing me his love and need for me in the way he knows how since words don't always come easy to him, but he does better than he thinks he does. "I love you Kyra, more than anything." 

Except for the child but we both know that.

"I know," I promise him and he grips my waist just right and I have to bite back a moan as he begins tugging my dress up and I gasp out as he lifts me up, my back slamming into the wall as he pulls my legs around his waist, his strength always stunning me.

I'm breathless as he asks "How do you want it?"

"Rough," I answer, needing the release, needing the feeling of him inside of me that clears my mind better than any amount of meditation could and he holds me up with ease as he unzips himself and tugs my dress up to my waist, finding nothing beneath.

"Ever practical," he teases, wasting little time as I feel him line up with me, always ready for him.

"Always," I smile only to find myself choking out his name as he enters me. "Din-"

"That's it," he says soothing me through it, this being one sensation I don't think I will ever get used to. "Say my name."

~

By the time we're approaching Tython we're in the cockpit with Grogu, dressed now for combat in case it finds us as it so often does. Grogu's in my lap while Din's doting over him from the pilots seat.

"Grogu." The kid looks up from his ball in surprise at hearing his name and Din chuckles lightly while Grogu goes back to his ball but he can't resist. "Grogu?"

Grogu looks back up at him and Din makes a sound of astonishment that leaves me sitting there drowning in adoration for this man but remember I'm still responsible for training the little green rascal. "Din, cyare, try the trick you did with Ahsoka, the one with the ball."

He nods and holds his hand out, voice gentle "Give me the ball."

Grogu leans away, not wanting to give up his precious ball and looks up at me as if asking if I'm really going to let him take it and I chuckle "It's okay Grogu."

"Grogu," Din says again. "Give me the ball." Grogu resists, and I begin to wonder if I should be more concerned over his attachment to that ball than to us. "Come on."

He hands it over and I do find it interesting he does understand us almost completely when we speak with him even if he can't talk back, not yet at least but considering all the poor thing's gone through I wouldn't be surprised if he was selectively quiet and that it's delayed his speech. One of the many things we will work on together.

Din holds the ball up between his fingers and Grogu leans forward on my lap "Okay, here we go. You can have it, just like before." Grogu reaches out but not with the force and Din tilts his helmet towards him "Grogu come on, you can have it."

And then I feel it, the focus and nod approvingly as he uses the force to reach out and bring the ball to him and as he catches it Din proudly exclaims "Dank Farrik!" Grogu quickly drops the ball and I kiss his little head as Din quickly backtracks "Hey no, I'm not mad at you, you did good."

"You did Grogu," I affirm gently as he coos "So good."

Grogu listens to Din as he says "When the nice lady said you had training I just-" for a moment I remember my own father training me, how excited he'd get when he saw the progress I'd made and Din reaches forward to put the ball in his hands "You're very special kid."

"You are," I say cuddling him in my lap. "And I'm going to train you just as my dad trained me. " He coos up at me and I smile "I'll teach you to use the force and to speak, to read." Din's watching as I lift him up and he squeals happily. "I dare say your dad will teach you to use a blaster."

"Not a proper blaster yet, but a training one," Din says and I laugh as he makes the motion with his hand. "He won't be able to pull a trigger so it will be one of the ones you squeeze."

"Oh maker I love you Din Djarin," I tell him in pure adoration and feel the warmth beneath that beskar. "And I love you too Grogu."

The kid's smiling as he reaches out, dropping the ball to touch my face and I kiss his forehead, holding him as Din reaches over to squeeze my knee before lowering us into Tythons atmosphere.

I'm absentmindedly humming to Grogu as we enter and look about realising we have absolutely no idea where to find this singular rock on a planet that's no doubt filled with old Jedi relics but thankfully it finds us as we lay eyes on what looks to be a type of temple with a stone in the centre.

"That the one?" Din asks me as if I know anymore than he does but remember I am meant to be the Jedi after all.

"That's the one."

"Alright kid," Din says. "Let's take you to the magic rock."

I shake my head at him while smiling, it's hard not to love him when he views the force with more wonder and mysticism than anyone I've ever met, it makes me see it through new eyes.

He circles it looking for a place to land while I hold Grogu up so he can see and Din says "I can't land on top, we'll have to travel the last stretch with the windows down."

"That's fine," I tell him but can't help the anxiety that comes as we land, that nagging feeling still there. "I just don't want to be too far from the ship."

He nods and he has a hand on my back as we walk out, I sigh when I see the distance we have to walk "Well, we'll be stretching our legs at least."

Din just tilts his head down towards me "Do you really think I'd make you walk?"

And so moments later we're flying to the top, Din holding the kid and I, and it makes me begin to reconsider the issue of my own armour. I discarded it out of shame but now... now it feels as if I'm starting to atone for my defeats.

Perhaps it's time I pick up my armour again, if not for myself then to better protect the child and Din's words are certainly a contributing factor. 

We land at the seeing stone and I take in the geometry of the temple, hesitant at what exactly this seeing stone entails but the force's presence here is undeniable. I'd heard stories but feeling it is something else entirely.

"Well, I guess this is it," Din says but still I look back towards the ship, not denying the feeling in my gut but try to not let it show for Grogu's sake.

"The legends say this planet is where the call of the force was heard by the first Jedi," I say to Grogu, the recognition of the name having come to me in the ship. "I remember the stories my father would tell me of the wars here between the light and the dark." I look around, having found the stone but know there should be far more ruins scattered across the planet Luke would find interest in and tell Din. "I want to stay and look about but I've got a bad feeling."

"A bad feeling?" he repeats, trusting my instincts by now.

"I can't pinpoint it, but I want to leave as soon as we're finished at the stone," I answer and he looks about confused since it seems we're the only people on this planet and decide. "After this we're going to Kalevala."

"Kalevala?" he repeats back to me, no doubt knowing the planet since it's in the Mandalore sector but in confusion as to why I'd want to go there

I've come to the place the Jedi originated from, but something is calling me back home and being here, it's as if the force itself is telling me to return.

"To my family's castle," I say and he tilts his helmet towards me in disbelief.

"Your family's castle?" he exclaims. "You have a castle?"

"I'm royalty Din," I remind him and that seems to shock him more than anything else I've ever revealed to him. "You know this."

"I know but there's a difference between saying you're a princess and having a castle."

I look at him incredulously. "Din, I literally ruled Mandalore."

"I know, I know" he assures me but still asks "You have an actual castle and you're living in an apartment on Chandrila?"

I blink at him in offence before confirming "Yes, I have a castle."

"Here that kid?" Din says to Grogu as we walk towards the stone. "You're gonna get a castle."

I laugh as we reach it and remind him "You know for him to inherit we have to take the proper adoption vows."

He stops for a second as if he hadn't even realised he hasn't yet. "You're right, we haven't." His voice is heavy as he tells me "Before you came along I- I could never bring myself to call myself his father. He was always a foundling in my care I thought I would have to give up, but now-"

"Now things are different," I say and hold him as I tell him "He's your son, your foundling, no one's going to take him away from you." I rub Grogu's head as I say "Isn't that right Grogu?"

He smiles and I take him from Din to place him on the rock "Okay now, I don't know what's going to happen but you're going to do what uncle Luke, and no doubt many other Jedi have taught you, and meditate." He makes an annoyed sound as I put him down and sigh "I understand, but you've got to do it, okay?"

He makes a sound resembling an okay and that's good enough for me. Din and I stand back waiting for something to happen and he asks me "Do you feel anything?"

Nothing overly strange aside from the impending doom and overwhelming concentration of the force and ask him curiously "Why, do you feel something?"

He looks around before answering "I feel the wind." He takes a glove off and holds his hand up. "Kind of."

Definitely not force sensitive then.

I take his hand and squeeze it, bringing his attention back to Grogu who sits on the stone watching us instead of connecting to the force.

"Grogu, concentrate," I lecture him. "I know you can feel it."

Din tries to help as he says to Grogu "This is the seeing stone, are you seeing anything?" Grogu just coos and he looks at me and asks "Can you?"

"I will" I answer, knowing if I sat on that stone and meditated I could certainly see many things, but it is Grogu who first needs to. "You see he and I always feel the force but because of how strong it is here it is easier for us to channel it and to have visions."

"Visions of what?" he asks me and I swallow.

"I dare say nothing happy," I tell him stiffly. "But we need Grogu to reconnect with the force without fear and for me to be able to use it to communicate with him as Ahsoka did."

He turns his head towards me and quietly asks "Why can't you?"

A question I've been asking myself for a while but the answer is simple, a combination of my own neglect in connecting with the force and the fact the only force sensitives I ever knew were my father, Luke and Leia. It's out of my expertise.

"You see Din, some people are naturally stronger with the force than others, they would be taken to the Jedi temple to be trained but there are those who are stronger than others. Grogu is one of the strongest to live, as was his father or rather sperm doner," I find myself muttering. "My father was never exceptionally strong and neither am I, he was only a few years younger than myself when he finished his training. It was his devotion and discipline to the force and to his training that made him strong in comparison to his apprentice who was much like Grogu, all raw strength but little discipline."

Grogu makes an offended sound and Din assures him "We know you're trying hard Grogu, it's okay. You're doing great kid."

"He is, compared to myself which has been a reasonable enough amount of raw strength but little discipline these past years. Meanwhile Ahsoka was likely one of the stronger Jedi if she was given to Anakin to train," I explain to Din. "And she's still had more training than I, proper training in the temple by many masters which is something I've never had. My father taught me well, but our time together was cut short. Despite training Luke I still have much to learn, and if Grogu can remember his training and I can see those memories it can help both of us."

"So you'll sit on the stone after him?" Din asks and I nod, turning my attention back to getting the kid to concentrate.

"Feel the force Grogu," I instruct him. "I know you can. It's strong isn't it?" He nods and I prompt "Now close your eyes and let yourself feel it, you don't have to be afraid, we're here, you're safe."

Sometimes I still find it strange, the jump from training a nineteen year old grown boy just older than myself to a child. Although it isn't that different really, Luke may be all serious now but maker knows he wasn't when I was training him.

Din looks around and asks me "Is he supposed to see something or is something supposed to see him?"

I actually stop for a moment at that question and wonder "Both could be possible."

Still Din walks around the stone as Grogu tries to concentrate wondering "Maybe there's a control or something."

I watch as he uses the settings of his visor to search for any mechanics in the rock until I have to interrupt.

"Din, ner cyare," I say, finding his effort to be involved in his training truly endearing, I really can't help but adore it, but have to inform him"That's not how the force works. Let the kid concentrate."

But just as the kid looks as if he's gotten into that meditative state his eyes open up and he reaches for a butterfly. 

Din sighs and tells me "I'll never understand the force."

"You will," I assure him and squeeze his hand. "The first thing is to remember it is not physical or literal, it is a sense as much as hearing or seeing, or rather feeling like you'd feel an emotion, but it takes effort to connect with." I look at Grogu and tell him "Effort Grogu, now close your eyes and focus."

I use the force to non fatally flick the butterfly away and after a sound of protest he closes his eyes and finally settles into a meditative state leaving Din and I in a state of awe as the inscriptions around the stone come alight and a force shield emerges around Grogu.

"Holy-" I hear Din begin and nod in agreement, not having seen anything quite like this before but our awe is interrupted by the sound of something entering the atmosphere.

Slowly I turn to see the ship entering the atmosphere and the very blood is drained from my veins at the sight of it, a ship I know far too well. 

My eyes fall shut, everything making sense now.

"Is it a Jedi?" Din asks in confusion and slowly I shake my head. "Kyra?"

I can feel him so strongly, that whisper that's haunted me right here, right now.

This can only end bloody.

"Get the kid," I order, drawing my saber. "Now!"

But as he goes to grab the child the forceshield blasts him back onto the ground and with wide eyes I help him up, anxiously looking up at Slave I and back to the kid.

"Is it the Empire?" Din asks me but I can't even bring myself to speak his name as I grab Din's blaster and he yells out as I fire five shots right into the forceshield only for each one to be reflected. "Kyra!"

"The kid's safe here but we need to get to your ship and get weapons," I order him, the forceshield being enough protection for me. "Get ready for a fight."

"What-"

"Ship, now!" I order and he yells out after me as I run down the mountain, keeping low as I make my way through the scrub, his voice fading out as he runs after me and I don't stop until I'm met with blaster fire and he quickly takes cover as I reflect the shots with ease and stand out in the open, unafraid and perhaps already a little mad.

"Kyra!" I hear Din barking out, trying to get me to take cover but I am not hiding.

"Come out Boba," I call and feel the pure panic from Din as he finally realises who we are facing, realises why my first instinct was to draw my weapon. "You hunted me down on Tatooine, don't run away now!"

I should be terrified but I'm not. He has haunted me for half a decade now, ten years since I first laid eyes on him. I know him too well to fear him.

But it's as he emerges cloaked in black a different horror has me in its grasp and I look upon the man I once loved as he stands before me, scared and deformed, as if he's aged twenty years from the damage done to him. 

The damage I did to him.

I draw a sharp breath and he sees it, he sees the horror in my eyes as I whisper his name.

"Boba."

[lovestruckgavemefeels]

@wildfirewildflower when I found your fics 😁

How it feels to read a really good fic and find the author has dozens more like it 

[galacticwildfire]

found.

Twenty Five

Pairing: Kenobi!oc x Din Djarin

Summary: Satine and Obi-wan’s daughter fought in the war against the Empire and lost her faith when she lost Mandalore. Until she found him. A lone Mandalorian searching for a Jedi.

Warnings/tags: Trigger warnings for flashbacks: suicide attempt, violence, gunplay, trauma. For the rest of the story: near death, jealousy, violent impulses, threatening, descriptions of ptsd and injuries, mentions of miscarriage, angst angst angst, Din and Lando united against Boba

Word Count: 7.9k

A/N: it gets worse before it gets better but the next chapter is angst to the extreme. I have the proceeding fight between her and Boba written but it would have pushed the chapter to 10k words so expect it in the next one. I wanted to spend some time in Boba's pov exploring the other side of their story from his eyes. Also one scene is very much inspired by the "we don't like him do we" one from ginny and gerogia,

ALSO THAT NEW EPISODE. NOW THAT IS MOTIVATION TO WRITE.

~

~

~

Boba Fett

From the cockpit I can hear the Mandalorian talking to her as if that alone could undo a missile impact. He loves her. Not that I can blame him. Once I was in the same state as him after pulling her out of that rubble after the oxygen in her lungs had been replaced with chemicals, not that she was conscious to see it. Much like now, but something tells me she'll know.

She always does.

Perhaps I said the things to the Mandalorian that I did out of spite, perhaps I respect the man, maybe I want to kill him, maybe it's the fact it was easier to voice the hate in my heart than to look at her dying in another man's arms. 

He's terrified, I was as well when I saw the missile impact.

But I was right when I told him she's both too stubborn to die and too hard to kill. A trait the rest of the Jedi didn't share, one I attribute to her sheer spite more than Mandalorian blood, but what keeps me calm is knowing I've seen her perform stranger miracles than surviving a direct hit from a missile. 

Fennec and I sit in silence as we enter the system until she finally breaks it.

"You neglected to tell me the woman who had your armour was formerly pregnant with your child."

There is frustration in her voice, almost repulsion, not that I can criticize it when she heard the whole of it. "Was. A long time ago."

She is hardly one to judge, but she does. "That information would have been valuable before engaging."

I scoff, forgetting most aren't familiar with warriors like Kyra "How so?"

"I hadn't accounted for a vengeful Jedi," she says and shakes her head, touching her throat from where Kyra strangled her. Her willingness to use the force to commit violence is something I had not accounted for, but I should have known threatening her would only make her snap. 

"Well it seems she is the only one of those left in the galaxy," I say, glad to know at least one of us has not changed. 

"We owe them Boba," she says stiffly. "For the child."

"I know," I say quietly. I owe her. If she has claimed this child as hers, whether as a padawan or a foundling, or more likely both, it's my duty to return it to her. "And we will help them if she lets me live long enough."

Physically I know she can kill me, she may be one of the few people still alive who can. I haven't been on the receiving end of an attack from her, not truly at least, but I've seen enough to know what she is capable of, it's only ever been her heart and damned code that's held her back from committing massacres. 

I've heard the rumours, that her and Skywalker walked into a room with Vader and the Emperor and only they left alive. I hope she killed them, with Skywalkers strength and her skill they are they only people in the galaxy who could. 

I'll never forget the day I stood in that throne room on Mandalore when Viszla challenged her, a hulking man with a full foot on her and still he ended up beaten. 

And that was without her Jedi tricks.

"Mando filled the space you left in the guild after the Sarlaac," Fennec warns me, I'd done my research and came to the conclusion that Kyra would only find herself in league with a man who could rival her. "I can assure you that he's just as likely to drop you once she's safe."

"Great," I find myself saying. He's taken my woman and my reputation without even realising it. "He can take what he wants, but there is no other bounty hunter like me. Only me."

"Except for the fact you're in love with the same woman," she says, more frustrated I withheld important information from the mission than anything else. "That you had also neglected to inform me of."

"Fucking the same woman," I correct. "I never said anything about love."

"I'm not deaf," she shortly, no doubt having heard the conversation below. "I thought living with the Tuskans was what made you soft, not her."

"She did," I force myself to admit. "And it got me all but killed."

"Better not make the same mistake twice then," she says and that's the end of the conversation, yet for just a moment I remember what it was like to have Kyra beside me in this cockpit, remembering it all too well. Right from the first time we met, when she paid me to smuggle her to Mandalore after her mothers death, hiding behind a veil and giving no name.

"First time dealing with a bounty hunter?" I asked her, having picked up on the fact she was some aristocrat but I never could have known the Mand'alor herself was sitting beside me.

"Something like that," she answered. "I sat in that Cantina for hours, I approached you because of that armour you wear, those who follow the old ways have a code of honour about them for the most part."

"Then why are you suspicious of me?" I asked her, her body cues obvious enough.

"Because suspicion has kept me alive."

I was almost impressed although cautious when I realised I had a refugee onboard. "Would I be right to assume you aren't quite friends with the Empire?"

"No one is friends with the Empire," she said, and there was a regal yet frustrated tone to her voice that should have alerted me to who she was as it was all too similar to the Duchess Satine's. "We all live under their rule, for some that is more difficult than others."

"We all do what we must to make a living," I told her, just wanting to make my way through the galaxy with some credits in my pocket. "Why make life more difficult for yourself?"

"That's a good question," she said, she was a young woman but spoke with a self righteous wisdom that felt too familiar. "Some of us are born into difficult situations, it's all we know."

"With the wealth you have it can't have been that difficult," I dismissed. "You sure have enough beskar to keep yourself comfortable."

"Blood money," she replied and those words sparked my intrigue.

"What money isn't blood money?" I asked her, but she knew that and still judged it with the true hypocrisy of a Jedi. "Did you forget who you hired?"

"A bounty hunter," she answered simply. "And from the price you charged that man on Tatooine a very good one I suspect, expensive enough for these parts anyways."

"If you've lived your life on Tatooine you would know it is the rate for Bounty Hunters of my experience, it's in the outer rims where blood money runs thick," I said and tilted my head towards her. "Unless that is just another part of your story."

"You doubt I'm Mandalorian," she said and then left me stunned as she spoke in Mando'a. "I am more than most who claim to be."

Oh little did I know just how much until we were entering Mandalore's atmosphere and she was telling me to fly past Imperial ships straight for the palace and I felt like the greatest fool in the galaxy realising I was sitting beside the spawn of a Mandalorian duchess and a Jedi, a Jedi I'd once tried to kill. 

She'd kept up her game of disguise all the way from Tatooine until that moment, even after I'd found the bodies of the stormtroopers she'd left on a layover planet the moment I'd let her out of my sight. I'd sat here in this very cockpit dumbfounded at having been blindsided for one of the very few times in my life, that the aristocratic woman I'd agreed to smuggle was a very capable killer and I didn't even know it. That I didn't know I was sitting beside someone who moved like a ghost and shed blood without blinking an eye.

I think that was the very moment I knew I was fucked.

Maker knows I still am and she might not even make it to Cloud City. But I can't afford to think like that, after all she's endured she won't die today. She can't. Not like this. 

She's older now, closer to the age I was when I met her, and with age has certainly come both beauty and bitterness. She's no longer a girl shouldering the weight of Mandalore and the Jedi on her shoulders, but a battle scarred woman who has lost more than most could ever fathom. Something I did not understand, not until the murder of the Tuskans. It is easy to blame those with a responsibility until you are the one carrying it, and having failed. 

I went to her on Tatooine not just for the armour, I didn't beat Cobb Vanth just for beskar, but for her. That was when I discovered the Mandalorian and knew something had changed.

All those years during the war, from retaking Mandalore after her mother surrendered it to that day on Tatooine, we found our way back to one another. No amount of hate or betrayal could ever change that. Even that last night together no matter how much she hated me it didn't stop her from pulling me into bed. 

I tried to convince her to abandon it all, but she wouldn't. Even so, after Cloud City I turned on Vader. She can scoff at me and deny I'd ever draw a blade on him, but I did when he told me he knew she was pregnant when he tortured her but it was too late to undo the damage that had been done. I never knew she'd lost the child then.  For months I tried to get back to her until I lured her to Tatooine, expecting her to be half a year or more pregnant and there she stood as I'd last seen her with such rage in her eye that I believed what Vader told me she would do and she let me believe it.

Vader twisted both our minds, and now I know the truth all I feel is shame. Shame that the one good thing in my life, my one chance at a future to be a good man as my father was, I ruined it.

I ruined her.

And yet I can't accept what is right in front of my eyes.

That she loves this strange Mandalorian in a way she did not love me.

All those years of running around the outer rims together so her family would never know about us and now this Mandalorian seems to know them all. That was what told me all I needed to know in my questioning. She loves him, I knew that when I watched her find him bleeding out on Tatooine, but here she suddenly is with a child and a man she'd brought to meet the people she loves most. The two things her and I never had, the two things that were impossible for us despite how close we came to having it.

Everything I wanted for us, the freedom to travel the galaxy with just her and our child, a life together without the war or the Empire or the Rebellion. Just us.

Everything I wanted, everything I spent years fighting for, suddenly she has with another man.

That wounds me more than any words she could ever say.

I would have done anything for it, but she would never abandon the Rebellion for anything, not me, not Mandalore, nothing.

We were in bed together in an inn on a world where no one would know us, it was the unspoken condition of our arrangement following our reunion after Mandalore. We were each others secret.

My arm was around her shoulder, tired smiles on both our faces as I watched her inspect my new blaster. She was warm in my arms, the only soft thing I had in my life.

"It's expensive," she said, despite her insistence that blasters were uncivilised in comparison to a lightsaber she had no problems wielding one.

"I'm expensive," I reminded her, not that she needed it.

"Oh I know," she assured me and it earned a low chuckle. I watched in quiet amusement as she lined the blaster up with a decorative plate on the wall, making blaster sounds with her mouth.

I raised an eyebrow at the display "It sounds a bit more sophisticated than that."

"Yeah alright shut up," she laughed and I reached around to put a hand over hers. She didn't need any instruction with a blaster but I knew she liked it and so did I.

"It's silenced," I told her as I watched her face. "Yet still able to penetrate the thickest of armour. It's a smooth design, not bulky. Perfectly rounded edges."

"Hmm," she hummed as her already naked body warmed and I ran the barrel along her jaw knowing how she liked it, and there was nothing more erotic than watching her face as I fucked her with my blaster. Nothing. She bit back a moan as I ran it over her lips, getting her just how I wanted her as she tilted her chin up towards mine, her eyes fluttering closed as she murmured my name "Boba."

"Princess," I said, liking how she melted with a single touch and tried in vain to get her to leave that damn inn with me when I had her in the only state I could ever get her to beg in "You should come with me for a while, wherever you want to go."

Her eyes opened and that lovestruck look was gone. "You know I can't."

"You can, you just won't." With that she sat up and held the blankets to her chest and I sighed as I tried to bring her back "Kyra-"

"Don't," she said harshly as I broached that one subject that was sorely off limits.

"Is it so wrong to want you with me?" I asked her and pressed my lips to her shoulder. "Would anyone know if you disappeared for a few days..."

"Yes, considering I'm leading an attack in a few days they would," she revealed, always in anger giving more than she would otherwise and sighed "Boba, you know I want to."

"Then what's stopping you?" I asked her, bit by bit trying to get her to see what she was too stubborn to admit. "The rebellion will survive without you."

"If you want me that badly then come with me," she countered, as defiant as ever.

"That would make things more complicated than necessary," I said, by then she'd had to have known what I was doing and who I was working for, how couldn't she when I was running into her rebel friends in the field.

"You're the one making things complicated by hunting down my friends," she finally snapped and I leaned back in defeat knowing it was only a matter of time before she brought up the last altercation. "Fuck Boba, of all the targets you could take-"

"Solo pays the most," I said and the way she shook her head in anger spurred something in me. "Why do you care?"

She said it as if it was obvious, painfully in denial Solo would fuck her if given the chance and she was far too defensive of him for my liking. "Because he's my friend."

I scoffed "Why are you fucking him too?"

Her eyes widened and I knew I'd certainly hit a nerve in the way she slapped me hard without a moment of hesitation and I grabbed her wrists, pinning her down beneath me despite how she struggled and spat out "Fuck you Boba."

"Are you?" I repeated and saw a sick pleasure in her eyes at riling me up how she did despite how deeply the accusation angered her.

"Why would you care if I was?" she countered, and this time it was her who crossed one of our many unspoken lines. "Don't tell me you love me?"

It had been two years since she'd found me in that cantina, since she'd paid me in beskar to take her to Mandalore and had somehow convinced me to stay as her commander. She was arrogant enough not to take no for an answer and for some reason I allowed it. Of all the work I'd taken, being paid to fight for her and then fuck her every night was far from the worst of it.

Until it became more than that.

I never expected to want to stay, I never knew how invested I'd become until she decided to give it all up to return to the rebellion and left Mandalore in the hands of her aunt. Being the daughter of a Jedi and a pacifist the vengeful temper was a surprise I couldn't place, not until I met Bo-Katan Kryze. They both knew that Bo-Katan was everything Kyra could grow to become, while Kyra was everything Bo-Katan could have been.

Bo-Katan had been defending the palace with the darksaber Kyra had handed to her upon pointing her regent whilst Kyra fought on the front lines against Darth Vader and his legion before the bombs came. They both survived, I don't know what words were exchanged but it was enough for Kyra to bring down the ruins of the palace upon herself while her aunt and her Nite Owls lived. 

I didn't know I loved her until I pulled her out of that rubble on Mandalore, but I couldn't admit it, not to her. I was Boba Fett and she was an inconvenience, one I found myself indulging in every chance I got.

"Don't be stupid," I said but she looked right through me and I hated it. "I don't like other men touching what's mine."

"Last time I checked I'm not yours, not when the only time I can have you is like this." 

"I'd beg to differ."

She pushed against my hold on her but I didn't let up until she said "No I'm not fucking Han you jealous bastard." Maybe I wanted to believe it so I had an out but the moment I released her wrists she grabbed my face and pulled me down between her legs as she told me "I have what I want." Her next words were the closest either of us could come to telling ourselves and each other the truth. "And that's you Boba."

I watched her eyes darken at the feeling of my blaster between her legs and knew I had her as I gave her a single command "Show me."

And even as she sunk down onto the blaster she still believed she was in control, but if there was one thing she knew how to do, it was to take what she wanted.

It was that attitude that put her on the throne of Mandalore but it was her loyalty to the rebellion that lost her it, her misplaced loyalty that put us on opposite sides of this war. For a moment I was more than a bounty hunter, I was the right hand of the Mand'alor, an honourable man. I watched her fight every challenge to her reign, I watched as she tamed the clans who would have overthrown her if they saw a moment of weakness.

That was until she received one call from the Princess of Alderaan and she put the darksaber in her aunt's hands to run off to the rebel base with her battalion of warriors. That was when it fell apart, the screaming match in the empty throne room in the dead of night. All because she was too afraid to lose her so called family, all because she was that vengeance mad after her parents deaths. I understood the thirst for vengeance and would have been by her side to take it with her, but not when she thought vengeance meant returning to the rebellion.

She should have been glad she was born after the fall of the Jedi order, or else she would have been cast out for her insufferable heart. Her one and only weakness.

Mandalore would have withstood the Empire under her rule if not for it. If she'd made decisions without it instead of letting her own stubbornness and vendetta against the Empire leave Mandalore unstable and open to attack. She was always too much like her mother in believing through sheer willpower alone she could save Mandalore and they both lost it. In the end her mother surrendered it to the Empire so it would survive whilst Kyra did it so she could avenge her parents.

Now she's running around the galaxy with a Mandalorian who won't take off his helmet and a kid that was one of Yoda's species without a clue in hell what she's doing. 

If I know anything it's that she protects and avenges what she's lost with the fierceness of a true Mandalorian. I left the Mandalorian to die and the kid was taken whilst we had them at blaster point. We enter the planets atmosphere and I know if she doesn't murder me when she wakes up I'll call myself a lucky man.

"Slave I, turn your ship around or be met with force," the air traffic controller says and I just sigh having anticipated no less.

Before I can try to tell them their beloved rebel hero is on board the Mandalorian comes up to the cockpit and buts in to speak into the com.

"This is Din Djarin, tell Lando Calrissian I have Kyra Kenobi on board and she is gravely injured."

There's chatter in the background before being asked "Is Boba Fett on board?"

"Yes but the General needs immediate care or else she will die," he says, sounding how I feel. "Let us land without violence, either Calrissian or Solo will vouch for me."

I can't help but scoff at him being chummy with those two and Fennec gives me a warning look, clearly acquainted with this Din Djarin and not wanting a fight.

"Alright, proceed to land."

And so I land the ship in the same spot where she ran to me upon arriving on Cloud City, not knowing the Empire was already there and it being too late for her to escape.

Perhaps this time I can make things right.

I have to.

~

Din

The moment the landing dock opens I'm carrying her limp body out of that ship, being met with city guards and finally Calrissian who rushes out.

"What happened?"

"She has internal injuries," I say, knowing how is not urgent right now. "She's barely breathing.

"We've got a bacta tank," he says but just as we rush forward towards the building he comes to a stop, only just taking in the ship and immediately reaches for a blaster "Did he do this to her?"

"No," I say, gathering Calrissian knows their history. "We can deal with him later she needs help now!"

I can't keep the urgent edge from my raised voice, not when she's all but dead and we run inside. I'm cradling her head to my chest to keep it as still as I can as he leads me through the halls until finally we reach a medic bay. Calrissian immediately starts giving orders for the tank to be readied while I strip her of her armour to her underclothes without hesitation, this not being how I'd planned on taking it off when I first saw her walk out of that ship guns blazing in beskar. 

Calrissian brings over the harness to hoist her into the tank and the two of us get her inside it, in any other situation I'd cut a man's hand off for touching her in this state of undress but it hardly matters now when she's minutes from death. 

"Be careful, her head-" I begin as the nurses secure the breathing apparatus and it's in the way her limp body hangs as she's hoisted inside the tank for a moment I'm sure I'll be sick and I'm bracing myself on the wall, trying to keep myself from collapsing on the spot now she's out of my hands.

"Sir I need to ask you some questions," the doctor says and I struggle to compose myself as he begins "How did she obtain these injuries and how long ago?"

"Direct missile hit around an hour ago," I answer and watch the colour drain from her face. "She- she's a Jedi. The same missile blew my ship to ashes but somehow she survived."

Calrissian's swearing under his breath and nothing feels real as I'm bombarded with more questions he ends up answering.

"Age?"

"Twenty eight."

"Pre-existing health conditions?"

"Severe post traumatic stress," Calrissian answers as I step closer to the glass, putting a hand on it as if I could touch her, feel her pulse no matter how faint to assure myself she's still alive. "Previous head traumas, long term damage to her organs and nervous system from electrocution." 

My head snaps around towards him at those words, suddenly finding myself overcome by panic at having not known this whilst she was dying under my watch. 

"Force lightning it," he tries to explain but those words don't help. "It doesn't matter how but she's had heart palpitations for years but stopped taking medication for it. She has cognitive processing difficulties, memory loss and disassociation as lasting effects of torture. It's a long list of health conditions but nothing overly out of the ordinary for a war veteran."

Well it's too long for me and I repeat "Lightning?"

"The Emperor," he says and I only tilt my head in confusion. "She hasn't told you about when her and Luke went to kill the Emperor?"

I feel my eyes widen beneath the helmet and I look back at her in pure shock, I knew about Darth Vader but somehow she never mentioned that.

"They killed the emperor?"

"No, technically not but she definitely tried-"

It's then we're interrupted by Boba Fett "She still alive?"

"You can get out!" Calrissian snaps at him and immediately my hand is on my blaster as he appears in the doorway too calm for my liking. 

"In the purge she suffered chemical burns to the insides of her lungs and crush wounds," Fett reveals whilst I stand there ashamedly ignorant of this information, knowing none of it aside from the effects of torture. "She suffocated and I had to restart her heart manually before I could get her help, you'll want to keep an eye on her vitals."

"Noted," the doctor says and hesitantly looks between the three of us before asking "Now before we can do a full body scan I need to ask if there is any chance she could be pregnant."

I freeze beneath my armour, utterly still at the possibility that has not occurred to me before now. I don't know how many times I've been inside her in these past weeks, countless, almost every chance we've gotten away from the kid and everytime I was always as deep inside of her as I could have been when I finished. She never mentioned any protection and I never asked despite knowing I should have, perhaps selfishly wanting the consequences of such an act to happen and silently hoping so did she as she always wrapped her legs tight and held me inside of her after we'd both finished. 

Now after everything I've learned, that she was once with child... there are so many things we never discussed that we should have, so many things I never knew.

Finally I stammer "Yes- she could be."

Boba Fett stays wisely silent, that is until Calrissian awkwardly steps in and says "She has a birth control chip, it shouldn't be expired."

He doesn't look at me and I don't want him to, having tried to forget what I heard in the cockpit when she spoke to Solo after the attack on Tatooine. I was stressed over Fett coming after us when I'd heard Solo telling her they should let off some steam together, I certainly saw the panic that took hold of her and then the frustration when I asked if I'd have to worry about this one coming after us as well after she took off to hunt Fett down in the night.

She told me the truth about Calrissian with little emotion other than guilt, that he wanted to marry her and she ran away. Something that hadn't surprised me after that night. Although I was more than surprised to see him when I met her family, but quickly realised if she deems him family that is something I have to accept. 

And as far as I'm concerned right now he isn't the one I need to worry about.

"Well I'll be damned," Fett says and realise Calrissian can't look at him either. "She let you fuck her after what you did?"

I'm caught off guard, trying to keep an eye on Kyra in the tank to see if she's making any visible improvements, but those words certainly draw me back into the conversation.

"What I did was nothing compared to what you did," Calrissian says but that sparks enough alarm in me that my hand is on my blaster.

"What you did?" I repeat and Calrissian's eyes are on the floor, guilt written across his face.

"Ah, you don't know," Fett says, almost amused. 

"I know what you did," I counter and draw my blaster on Fett, Calrissian quickly drawing his own as well. "I know you're the one who betrayed her."

"I couldn't have done anything if Calrissian hadn't betrayed Solo and the others first by inviting Vader into the city to ambush them." 

I keep my blaster hand still as Calrissian replies "I never invited him, and if I recall you were the one by his side as they laid siege to the city."

"But not before you'd told Solo they were safe here," Fett argues. "She would have never stepped foot in this city if you hadn't betrayed your old friend first."

"I was there that day Fett, I heard her screaming for you to kill her after you turned her over," Calrissian says, repeating what I know from Kyra to be true. "Don't act innocent."

"Oh I know I'm not innocent," Fett replies. "But neither are you."

"Enough," I say sharply, not having the patience for any more of this and tell Calrissian "Moff Gideon took the child and I need to find a lead. He had to take Kyra out with a missile to stop her from cutting through his troopers and I'll need her with me. How soon will she be awake?"

His face falls and he tells me "I'm sorry, I know what that child means to both of you." He looks at Kyra before saying "I don't know how long it will take, but you got her here in time to save her life that's what matters. As for the kid I'll call in the cavalry and we'll make a plan."

I give a single nod, it will have to be enough for now. It has to be enough to keep me from losing my mind. She trusts her family, and I have to trust they won't let any harm come to her child.

"You should leave," I tell Fett and Calrissian points his blaster at him. "Or she won't be the one to kill you."

"Her and I have business," Fett replies and looks at me as he says "I'd say find me when she wakes but I have no doubt she'll do that herself."

He leaves and Calrissian and I stand there, the doctor stands in the corner of the room with her head down going over the vitals and organising the medical droid to run tests. 

"Fett's going to be a problem," I immediately say, not wanting to know what business he has planned. 

"He always is," Calrissian warns. "I was there when she found out he was still alive, I broke the news to her and she went straight to Tatooine to kill him so why is he still alive?"

A good question, one I don't want to answer.

"I've learned she likes to draw these things out," I tell myself, I'd settle for watching her torture him over the alternative.

"You going to kill him?" he asks and I have no doubt he wants to almost as much as I do.

"He tries anything I'll take care of it," I answer, my finger itching over the trigger, the only thing stopping me is Kyra. It's her blood to spill not mine, no matter how badly I want to. 

But what is truly stopping me as much as it makes me want to kill him where he stands is the thought she doesn't want him dead. That somehow she still loves him.

I'd suspected it from the start when I knew she'd come to Tatooine to kill the man that armour belonged to, with every piece of information she revealed I'd suspected it but it wasn't until that night after the attack when I woke to find her gone I realised it went far deeper than I could have known.

Unfortunately something tells me I'm about to find out just how deep.

~

Hours later I'm sitting there alone, the doctor out running the test results and from what I can gather she's confused as well as concerned. She should be dead, but after spending this much time with the kid I know these are things no scientist or doctor could understand let alone explain.

All I can do is guard her body as she rests before me suspended in the tank, as unresponsive as she was when I brought her in despite the doctor assuring me her vitals are growing stronger. 

Despite knowing she will live nothing has ever felt so dark. 

The kid is still gone and nothing will feel real until I have them both in my arms, until I can kiss her and do the one thing I thought I'd have more time to do.

I won't make that mistake again

Calrissian's called Solo to Cloud City since he's in the outer rims, if she's still unconscious by tomorrow morning I can rely on him to get me to Navarro so I can put a team together to get the child back. Time is running out and I need to do it with or without her as much as the thought terrifies me. 

I want to keep her safe, I don't want to put her in the field if she isn't able to fight, but she's the best fighter I've got. She was able to cut through those battle droid looking troopers with her lightsaber when our blasters could barely take out the Death Troopers. If we face the ones who took the child I doubt blasters will do the job. 

I'd dreamed of seeing her in beskar and it was as much of a sight as I'd imagined it to be if not more, having never seen armour in such a design before but considering her fighting style it makes sense. Seeing her wearing a helmet made me want to get down on my knees as much as I'd anticipated it could.

I just never thought it would be on my knees screaming her name in vain.

I eye her saber sitting beside her armour and take it, having only held it to give it back to her and study the mechanics of it, wisely pointing it away from myself as I activate the ignition and the yellow blade ignites. It's lightweight, making a sound as I move it through the air, easy enough to maneuver so simply but nothing like how I've seen her move it. I can't imagine the years of training required for her to be able to wield it how she does with such deadly precision and mastery. 

I disengage it as Calrissian enters the room telling me what I already know "She should be dead but she isn't and the doctors can't explain it."

I find myself repeating Fett's words "She's hard to kill."

"She is," he says and begins "Her and I... that had finished a long time ago, years ago, I only knew about the chip because we'd slept together a few times since then but that was over well before you two met."

While it's assuring to know she isn't still sleeping with him I don't care about that, not now. Now when she isn't in my arms and someone else is waiting for her to wake up. 

"How much as she told you about Boba Fett?" he asks me, going where I didn't want to. 

"Enough," I answer. She had told me everything important, except for one detail that I've gathered she'd convinced herself wasn't real, or at least tried to force from her memory. "She was pregnant when he betrayed her?"

He gives a stiff nod and lowers his voice "The empire had already garrisoned the city when she arrived. I saw him give her to Vader, saw her screaming for him to kill her and I saw the aftermath." He shakes his head, unable to look at her. "Leia and I found her in the cell after Han was taken away, we'd heard her screaming and trying to break out, there was blood all over the floor and she kept saying to Leia she didn't know." 

I feel sick knowing now the true extent of what the Empire did to her and understand now why she's so fiercely sought to protect the child by any means necessary. I now understand her vengeful streak towards the Empire and know when she wakes I'll be by her side as she takes it.

"In all these years we never spoke of it, I think part of her had blocked it out completely," he says, confirming my suspicions. "I never knew her before that day, I only knew who she was after that but Leia told me she was never the same as what she had been before. Leia was the only one who'd known her before the Death Star. I loved her, but I wondered what she would have been like if not for the Empire."

"She told me you bought her a ring," I say and he nods in confirmation and that dark paranoia in the back of my mind from that night she ran haunts me. "She told me Boba Fett was what caused her to run."

"It seemed like it should have worked her and I, but it didn't. I loved her in one way but in these past years it's been in another, as family," he confides in me, not hiding his care for her. "I would have married her but I was never what she wanted or what she needed. Boba Fett was what she wanted and in her own twisted way she still loved him after she struck him down. That was until you and the kid came along." I still at hearing those words from a man who once loved her, words that couldn't be more different from Fetts. "You're what she needs and I know you're what she wants."

"And I need her," I say and it's then I catch movement out of the corner of my eye from the tank. "Kyra?"

We both stand and what was a movement of her fingers quickly turns into kicking and thrashing as she tries to free herself and I'm yelling "Help me get her out!"

~

Kyra

I stood in the ashes of Mandalore after having escaped Vaders ship. My aunt, the last of my blood, turned her back on me and left me there on my knees. 

The world was dead, and so was I. 

Cold tears ran down my cheeks beneath the beskar of my helmet. There was not a thought in my mind, only the crushing weight of the darkness. Vader had felt it too as he twisted my mind. Death would have been more merciful, but he would not let me die. No. He wanted to turn me, to make me his apprentice in his final act of vengeance against my father.

Everything was still, a wasteland of the life I'd once had and the girl I'd been. 

Vader would come for me again, he was likely already on his way.

For the first time I believed if he finished what he started I would fall to the darkness. That despite my fathers counsel on the strength of those who resist the darkside I was no longer that strong anymore.

And so I slowly removed my helmet in the ultimate act of defiance against the Empire, against Vader. I would not die at his hands like my parents did.

The air was toxic, that much I knew with the first breath and I raised my gauntlet to record one final message knowing Leia would find me. Knowing she was the only person in the galaxy who would understand why I did it.

"Leia," I said, hearing the rawness of my own voice. "I survived the bombings but Mandalore is glass and ashes. There is nothing left." I knew it would break her heart, but she would understand. "Vader won't kill me, he won't stop until I turn and become a monster." My voice broke "I will not let him touch me again." The tears came and I whispered "I love you, and I'm sorry, but I can't let him make me into what he is. I can't live knowing my people are dead because of me. I can't." My voice was a mere whisper, feeling as if I'd broken the sacred vow between us two princesses after watching her survive her own planets destruction and Vaders torture, something I could not do. "I'm so sorry."

I wasn't afraid as I left my helmet in the open so they'd know where I was buried and stepped inside the ruins of the palace, it and I both barely standing. With each step forward I heard my fathers voice telling me to turn around and go to Luke and Leia and that was the first time I cut myself off from the force so all I would hear was silence as I got down on my knees and raised my hands to bring the palace down upon me, channelling the force for long enough I could hear my fathers voice in that final moment.

In the darkness my life flashed before my eyes from the start to an end I'd never seen before and the rubble crushed me, my chest feeling as if it would collapse from its weight and my lungs burned from the inside out. I was all but gone from the world when I heard a ship circling above and then a voice screaming my name as the darkness closed in on me.

"Kyra!"

In my slow death as the last bits of consciousness slipped I fought one final time at the sound of his voice and gasped out with ashes in my burning lungs, choking on the chemicals that replaced any oxygen left in the atmosphere, everything pure agony as I tried to dig myself out of the ruins.

"Kyra!"

 But it was not the voice I remembered. No. It's his.

"Din!" I scream finding the strength to truly fight this time. This time my limp body won't be dug out of the ruins as I barely cling to life, this time my hand breaks through the rubble and reaches for his. "Din!"

"I've got you," he says as he grasps my hand, pulling me from the darkness. "You're safe."

I'm gasping for air as I come to, finding myself weighed down until I'm pulled free, my body falling against hard familiar beskar. "I've got you, I've got you cyar'ika."

"Din?" I gasp out and cling to him as he clutches me in his arms, dripping and shaking with no comprehension of where I am, only that I'm with him. That I'm safe. "Din."

He cradles my head, his own hands shaking as he pulls a blanket around me and I look up at him, hardly hearing Lando leaving the room yelling for someone to contact Leia until the door slams shut and I don't understand the fear, the pure devastation that consumes him.

"Din?" I whisper, my head spinning as I try to make sense of where I am and what's happened, but I don't even have a moment to think before he's pulled his helmet off and his lips are on mine, hard and desperate as I taste tears. 

I'm frozen in bewilderment until he pulls away and orders "Open your eyes."

The request leaves me shaking my head, knowing something isn't right. "What-"

"Please," he whispers so heartbreakingly that I have no choice but to obey and my eyes open to look upon his face for the first time, finding beautiful brown tearful eyes and reach for his face wondering if this too is a dream. "Cyar'ika."

In my dreams he'd smile not weep, and I'm too overwhelmed by his own agony to truly take him in as he deserves to be. In my dreams I'd kiss him and tell him he's beautiful and mine and that I adore him. But in this moment all I feel is fear.

In this moment nothing feels real.

"Din?" I breathe, trembling as I search his eyes and my heart stops knowing only one thing could do this to him. "Where's Grogu?"

He shakes his head and pulls me to him, hand buried in my hair with my face pressed into the beskar of his chest as he quakes "He's gone, they took him."

Those words all but convince me this is a nightmare and suddenly I'm ten years old again, screaming as I was stolen from outside the palace walls of Mandalore except this time I'm feeling my own fathers horror at his child being taken from him.

Pure devastation washes over me as he clutches me tight and my shaking hands come to touch his beskar and yet I feel nothing as my fingertips run over what should be cold and know this can't be real.

But with the sound of a ship flying past it comes back to me in flashes.

Slave I.

Boba.

The child.

The Empire.

The missile.

My body jolts as I step out of Din's embrace, hyperventilating while I search for my saber, my armour, until I find them both nearby.

"Kyra," I hear Din say but the words echo around me, nothing is real. Not him, not me, nothing. Nothing but the cold rage that overcomes me. "My love."

"No," I whisper, my trembling hands moving to arm myself. "No-"

"We're going to get him back," he tells me as I struggle to even hold my armour with the feeling in my hands all but gone. "Cyar'ika-"

He turns me back to him and I look upon his face with cold tears running down my cheeks and he takes my hands in his, bringing them to his lips as I stand there a trembling mess, unable to remember how I got here. Unable to remember anything but flashes.

"We're getting him back," I grit out, looking into the eyes of the man I love as I swear to him "We're taking our son back, now help me with my armour."

He does, but not before kissing my forehead, the weight of what he's done unable to truly sink into either of us in this state and I pull his lips to mine, tasting his tears and mine both before the sound of footsteps has him pulling his helmet back on and helping me dress myself in my armour.

He's pulling my sleeves up and securing my weapons belt when I sense Lando and blink in confusion, it's only then as I truly look around I realise where I am.

Cloud City. Din must have brought me here knowing I'd be safe with Lando.

"Are you alright?" he asks me as he rushes in, speaking too fast for me to comprehend. "Leia knows you're here and the Falcon's just arrived." Still I struggle to comprehend the words being spoken to me until he says "Boba Fett is still here."

Boba.

Still all I remember are flashes, guns blazing and threats made until one sticks.

"I can kill the kid, like you killed our son."

He did this.

And he's going to die for it.

[galacticwildfire]

Found excerpt

Hey guys I know it's been forever since I've updated found buttt I've been working carefully on this next chapter because it's going to be beyond fucking crazy with Boba finally showing up so here is a flashback scene I've written for it

"You can claim you're better than me, doing what you do for the greater good, except you're lying," Boba told me. "You don't care about the greater good, or honour, you do what you do because you want revenge. You kill because you like it. You have a cruel streak in you, princess. Deep down you are just as ruthless as I am."

I hated how safe I always was with him, because he was the only person in the galaxy who I could show the worst of me to and he wouldn't even blink an eye. Even on Tatooine when I was Jabba's prisoner. Except the worst of me was only a fraction of the worst of him. "If I'm a killer then what are you? A masochist? A traitor? You are a man without honour Boba Fett."

Those last words struck a nerve. "You can pretend all you want. But you aren't a good person. You aren't a hero." He had me backed up against the wall. "Do you really think they'll love you once they know everything you've done?" His hand was around my throat as burning tears slipped down my cheeks. "Do they know you're the one who led me straight to Solo? That I killed your friend Skywalkers aunt and uncle?" I shook beneath his touch. "That you knew all along he was Vaders and lied to him, to everyone." But it was when his blaster pressed against my exposed stomach I knew that he knew. "To me."

[galacticwildfire]

Keep an eye out for Hope, a Star Wars story.

Hope Solo/Skywalker, daughter of Han and Leia. Born 11 ABY. Jedi. Resistance fighter. Eventual Captain of the Millennium Falcon. Lover of Poe Dameron.

I’ll be dropping the first few chapters at once on Wattpad/ao3 soon. I posted a version of it a few years ago here and have since deleted it and been rewriting it. It’s more oc driven than any of my other stories and the romance with Poe won’t happen until a bit later since it starts when she’s sixteen with the revelation about Vader being Leia’s father and Ben’s fall to the dark side and then will time jump to when she’s twenty around the time Poe joins the Resistance in 31 ABY.

Not sure if I’ll be posting it here since tumblr doesn’t like oc’s but I’ll post some excerpts as I write and if there’s interest I’ll upload it here.

First few chapters will cover the book Bloodline and then jump to the start of the Poe Dameron comics and loosely follow that and some other canon media’s until the Force Awakens with a couple of time jumps in between with plenty of exploits with R2 in true Skywalker fashion. It will be slightly dual pov with most from Hope’s pov and the occasional one from Poe’s, and maybe one or two from Leia’s.

I’ve been writing this since probably 2019 and have that many drafts but could never decide what direction I wanted to go in but it’s always been my favourite to write because of how much I love the Skywalker family and I’m excited for this one. Especially since they’re bringing Daisy back and Oscar Isaac is open to returning so now there’s so many possibilities.

[lokis-army-77]

This one should be out when I get back from my weekend vacation on Monday, I've been working on it in the car...

"You never have and you never will, so you might as well just leave me alone."

Here are a few of my favorite people atm: @wildfirewildflower @ursulasfishandships @whiiiiplaaaaash @just-call-me-angel @ofstarsandvibranium @sinner-as-saint @a-edgar-allan-hoe @clints-lucky-arrow @huntingingoodwill @girl-of-many-fandoms @wtchbtchj @klitzkitty @sabinemorans @mermaid-trash @pumpkin3-1415

WIP Game

Rules: Post the last line of your latest wip and tag as many people as there are words

(I literally never do that last part right, I'm tagging willy nilly)

I actually have something to add this time! Fuck you, writers block! Thanks for the tag @drabbles-mc 😘

I just brain dumped all over @magpie-to-the-morning about a new Moon Knight fic idea with an Avatar reader and then immediately started writing. So here you go:

It was a hollowness behind your ribs, an ache that was never soothed or eased. The loneliness was all you knew anymore, except for when she was with you. And you loved her for it, that small comfort she tried to provide as you served as her right hand, her justice. But this mission? It split you to the bone.

No pressure tags: @magpie-to-the-morning @phoebe-danvers @get-your-fics @fictitious-little-stitious @nocturnal-milk-dud @ashlingnarcos @narcolini

[galacticwildfire]

Hey guys reminder to follow me on Ao3 and Wattpad to get updates about stories since people have been dming and saying they haven’t been seeing updates here on tumblr. Same username and I always update there first before tumblr, also if I’m ever rewriting anything like I am with Illicit Affairs everything is up to date on both since it’s easier to update there than here.

[galacticwildfire]

Turns out I’ve written part of the scene where Luke and Kyra meet Yoda… I have about forty drafts of random scenes I haven’t opened in two years I’ve been going through as I write so expect to have part of that scene as a flashback somewhere but here is what I’ve come across and I have a feeling I wrote this while drinking

~

"I'm Kyra Kenobi and this is Luke Skywalker."

The old hermit looks like he's just died as he begins pacing about.

"No, no, no,” he rambles, banging his cane down on the ground. “Kenobi and Skywalker. Not again."

Luke blinks at him “Pardon?"

I yell out as he starts wacking us with his stick. "Away with you! Leave you will!"

“What the blazes!” I curse and pull Luke behind me.

[galacticwildfire]

Dear readers of found that I have neglected, I am going to go through and do some editing of the chapters to tidy them up while I reread because imma be honest I cannot remember anything 😭 so keep an eye out, taglists aren’t working so if you want to keep an eye on the updates follow me on Wattpad or ao3 where I have the up to date versions of all my stories (I am rewriting hope and will be purging the current version) but new chapter is coming just want to tidy things up and update it to the new canon that’s come with kenobi before I keep going