#only thing is that there was a family behind us in the cinema that kept talking AND kept using their phones ugh...

[dangerliesbeforeyou]

just went to see polite society (directed by nida manzoor aka the creator of we are lady parts aka one of the BEST tv shows of the last ten years lol) and it was honestly so much fun!! so many hilarious moments and some legit amazing action!

[kkayyerr]

Collar me.

Summary: You had always struggled with trying to find out where you actually belong, because Pogues never felt like an actual family to you. Until one day Rafe Cameron decided to show you just how exactly it feels to be someone’s belonging.

Pairing: Dark!Rafe Cameron x Pogue!puppy!reader.

Warnings: NSFW, Kidnapping, dub-con, weapons, swearing, degradation, humiliation, pet-play, orgasm denial, fingering, Dom!Rafe, Sub!Reader, slight dacryphillia, ownership.

Words count: 2,2 k

You knew that the Pogue’s lifestyle wasn’t for you since the first day you had joined them. Of course there was something exciting about all those trips and adventures, but somehow you felt lonely even in the large group of people. They had given you love and support and tried to make you get used to their lifestyle, but it still wasn’t enough for you. 

You still had a feeling that you didn’t belong with them.

That you don’t belong anywhere at all. 

You wanted something else; you wanted a quiet life under someone’s protection. Sometimes you just wanted to give control into someone else’s hands. 

Sometimes you just wanted to be controlled.

Of course you could never admit that, though. For Pogues, it sounded like hell, like something they would never expect to hear from you or each other. So you kept your mask on, trying to forget about those peaceful life dreams. How could your life even become peaceful when even a night at the open-air cinema had turned into pure chaos?

You were standing by, looking at how Kooks suddenly started to outnumber your friends. It started with only Rafe and Topper, but the others showed up also. You knew that you shouldn’t have dived into their conflict, but you just couldn’t stay there and watch your friends getting severely beat up by a group of assholes.

You approached them and stood right between your friends and Kooks. All of them were breathing hard, preparing for another round. You quickly jumped right onto Rafe, kicking him in the chest, not harming but definitely getting his attention and winning some time for the Pogues.

 

„So you’re not going to hit me? What a gentleman.”

 

You knew that your behavior was going to ruffle his feathers, and you were doing that on purpose. The idea of pushing his buttons was somehow exiting to you, even though you couldn’t explain why. In the pale moonlight, you saw his face. You noticed that his expression wasn’t angry nor annoyed, no. 

He was smiling. 

That smirk sent chills down your spine; something about him was off. 

 

„I have a lot of better ideas.”

 

Right after he said that, you heard a couple of gunshots right behind you. You quickly turned around, trying to find out who had the gun in their hands, but the last thing that you saw was Pogues running away for their lives, clearly leaving you behind. At that point, you didn’t even care who had the gun; you just wanted to burst in tears there and then. 

Just a second later, you felt hit on the head from behind. Not hard enough to traumatize you, but clearly hard enough to knock you out.

The whole world turned black as your body felt down to the ground. 

…

„Where am I?”

 

It was the first thought that popped up in your head as you woke up in the strange place that obviously wasn’t your bed. You were completely naked, your whole body was sore, and you felt a little dizziness when you tried to stand up, so you just laid back. You also felt something on your face, but you couldn’t tell what exactly that was until you touched it with your hands. You quickly stood up, as the loud gasp of shook almost escaped from your mouth when you realized what exactly that was.

It was a muzzle.

Muzzle was covering half of your face, so you could've spoken but still would feel yourself uncomfortable enough. The one who did this to you didn’t want to gag you; they wanted to torment you using some twisted methods. You start exploring your body, looking for at least something, like bruises, cuts, or the least hand marks. But there was nothing. Your body was clear, and for some reasons it made you even more anxious. Because if nobody had touched or hurt you before, they most definitely were waiting for you to wake up. They might want you to actually feel the pain.

You started to spin your head around, trying to find something that would give you answers to all the questions in your mind. The room was empty; there was nothing. Only one window. You felt almost sick in your stomach as the view started to look very familiar.

You were in Tannyhill.

Your knees got weak, and you fell to the floor, covering your mouth with your hand. Slowly, memories started to kick in. Fight, gunshots, pogues leaving you behind—you're getting knocked out.

The puzzle was finally pieced together.

 

„You look way better without those Pogue clothes, you know?”

 

You almost jumped as you heard those voices behind you. Of course, you knew who was standing there. You slowly turned around; your face expressed pure hatred and anger towards the person who did this to you. Rafe Cameron was standing a few steps away from you; his face relaxed at first, but then his lips tugged into a small smile as he saw your face in the muzzle. He definitely was proud of what he had done.

 

„I decided to keep you around instead of killing you. I figured I could use you. At least for my entertainment.”

 

He stated, completely ignoring your warning gaze, filled with rage. You twisted your knuckles, trying to manage your emotions, but you failed, as you saw that little grin on his face that almost made your blood boil. The next moment you quickly approached him, wanted to attack him, and protected yourself at least somehow. Prove him that he was wrong.

Suddenly, you froze.

 

„Try something stupid again, and I will show you just exactly what happens to wild animals.”

 

He pressed the gun upon your head, just a moment before you could’ve actually done something to him. The hatred in your eyes now had turned into the fear. You didn’t expect that he would still have a gun with him, but you were so obviously wrong. He had the gun, and he definitely had you in his hands. He had you under control. 

 

„Don’t make me put a shock collar on you, puppy.”

 

Your lips twitched in disgust when the word „puppy” came out of his mouth. Sadly, there was nothing you could’ve done about the way he was treating you right now, and you fully acknowledged that. You slowly looked up, your gaze met his, and your skin was covered in shivers once again when you realized that there was no guilt in his eyes.

He most definitely was a psychopath.

And you most definitely were turned on. 

 

„I am not an animal, Rafe. You can’t do this!”

 

Your words only made him smirk. Of course he understood that you were a human being, even if you were a Pogue, but who said that human beings can’t become good pets? Rafe never liked animals, but he had certainly liked control and would definitely like taming a pogue. After all, you didn’t seem like a typical Pogue to him; something in you was different. 

 

„Well, your friends dumped you, so now it seems like you’re going to be my lapdog.”

 

He finally took the gun away from your head, but he was still holding it, just in case you’ll think about doing something stupid once again. He was really regretting not tying you up in the first place.

 

„And if you’re lucky, I’ll throw you a bone and give you a little pet on the head.”

 

You hated yourself so much for the fact that you were getting wet from his dirty words. Part of you, the one that had some self-respect, wanted to slap him across the face and watch how his smug expression would slowly disappear. But the other part didn’t want him to stop at all. 

 

„I will never be your little puppy, Rafe.”

 

You said, trying to keep your voice stern, even though your body had already weakened just from all the nasty thoughts that had filled up your little head. Fuck, isn’t that exactly what you wanted? He sighed, not impressed by your little attitude. After all, you were a pogue. A stubborn little girl without manners.

 

„It’s sad, you know? I thought that we were about to have our first playtime.”

 

You raised your eyebrows, obviously intrigued by his words. Mostly, you wanted to find out what he had meant by the word „playtime," even though you already had a lot of ideas in your head. While you were thinking, Rafe slowly put the gun on the nightstand and carefully inserted his hand into the pocket of his black trousers, searching for something. You were also invested in what he was doing. It was very interesting for you to find out what he was looking for. And when he finally found it, your eyes widened. He was holding a pink, beautiful collar in his hand that said „R.C.”.

 

„I won’t be wearing that.”

 

Rafe approached you, still holding the collar in front of your face, teasing you. He saw that glimpse in your eyes. You wanted to wear that little thing; you wanted to wear that so badly, but you were way too embarrassed to even think about admitting that and way too shy to say it out loud.

 

„Oh no, you’ll have to beg me to let you wear that. Being Cameron’s property is a big responsibility.”

 

You shook your head in disbelief. He was an idiot if he thought that you would actually ask, nor beg for something as humiliating as that. Of course, you wouldn’t, at least not right now. Even if you wanted too. Deep down, you also wanted to see how far he could’ve pushed you before your mask would finally slip off. 

 

„I think my friends will come for me anytime soon, so if I were you, I would quit those games.”

 

His eyes darkened for a quick moment, which surprised you because you didn’t know that he would take that childish threat seriously.

Your own face expression changed from slightly smug to confused when you felt his hands around your waist, tugging you closer to him. The next second he turned you around and roughly pushed you towards the wall, practicality pinning you against it. 

His hand quickly spread your legs without any pressure. To your own surprise, you didn’t even try to stop him; you didn’t even want him either. He leaned closer to your ear; his fingers now were teasing your outer lips, while your cunt was practically begging for his attention. 

 

„I bet you’ll come faster than your friends would, puppy.”

 

You were almost dripping wet. When his fingers finally dive in and almost immediately hit a spot, you let out a whimper, which then became a whole symphony of your moans as you arched your back from the torturous pleasure. It felt too good to be something bad or shameful. Rafe started to circle your clit, still not giving it enough attention for you to cum, but just enough for you to be on the edge, scratching the wall with your nails.

 

„Please”

 

Rafe chuckled at your plea, giving your clitter a little pitch and watching you squirm and muffle something; that would’ve most definitely come out as the loud scream. He just kept on teasing you, knowing that you would’ve cum in two seconds if he only touched your clitoral area properly. 

 

„I’m going to...”

 

Rafe suddenly stopped, not pulling out his fingers but also not making any moves. He grabbed a fistful of your hair, making you tilt back your head. He wasn’t done with you yet, and he wanted to teach you some manners. Rafe wanted to make sure that his pet would be on her best behavior.

 

„I’ll let you cum if you say something for me, deal?”

 

You automatically nodded, feeling how his fingers begin to play with your clitter again, this time softer, which somehow was even worse than his previous rough actions.

 

„You have to ask me to collar you, puppy.”

 

Your eyes widened at his words, even though you weren’t that surprised. You knew that he would pull something like that, because he always fucking did. Your knees got weaker, and your whole body started to shake as you felt that you were actually so close to finally cupping.

 

„C’mon”

 

Rafe taunt, his fingers getting rougher, teasing your clit and your inner walls, dangerously close to making it impossible for you to hold it in. Tears of overstimulation flashed down your cheeks as you finally felt ready to say those words out loud. 

 

„Collar me, Rafe.”

 

Just a small touch on your clit was more than enough for you to finally reach your breaking point. Moans of pleasure mixed with sobbings of embarrassment came out of your mouth right after you got your relief. 

Before you could’ve even thought about saying anything, you felt how something had been wrapped tightly around your neck. You knew exactly what that was, and for some reason that knowledge calmed you down. 

Now you were wearing something symbolizing your loyalty and, most importantly, your belongings. 

The pink collar with gold initials on it wasn’t looking that bad on you. 

„R.C”

Maybe the life of a property will suit you better?

[billwidoll]

The connection between us

____________________

Rafe Cameron has never been a fan of love. He always thought it was all a joke, he always kept his heart cold and his body active. He had relationships with girls, but it was only physical And Rafe didn't know why he was like this, maybe because he was never loved by any woman and he felt this way.

Most women were in relationships with Rafe for his money and Rafe was no fool and knew it or maybe it was because he was just good looking. But anyway, Rafe hated this marriage thing, Of couples and of love. He wanted it far away from him. Until one day...

Whezzie, Rafe's younger sister, asked her brother to take her to the cinema to watch the new Barbie movie. Rafe hated it, but his sister was the only thing he tolerated.

"let's watch the movie and then go home, you understand" Rafe speaks authoritatively, holding whezzie's hand, in the queue for movie tickets.

"it's cool Rafe!" Whezzie says, rolling his eyes at his brother.

Approaching the ticket box, Rafe saw the employee who was at the counter selling tickets. And it made Rafe see true female beauty. He noticed the way you smiled, the color tone of your hair, your bright and penetrating eyes, your sweet and soft voice, your angelic skin. He simply saw the goddess next to him.

"I'm sorry, but can you hear me?" He hears your velvety voice, directed at him.

He was so mesmerized, he didn't even notice you were talking to him.

"ah...and...my bad, I got lost in your eyes.." Rafe speaks without realizing what he had said and you give him a confused face

"no, no, no, that's not what I meant, what I meant and what I lost in my thoughts"

Rafe speaks finally justifying himself and you give a smile

"no, It's okay, this happens to me sometimes"

You speak, trying to soften this strange situation between you and this man you've never seen in your life.

"let's go Rafe! Buy the damn tickets" Whezzie says, clearly irritated by the whole situation, and Rafe takes a deep breath to keep from yelling at her.

"I want two tickets to the Barbie movie"

Rafe says, lowering his head so he doesn't meet your eyes again and be mesmerized. Rafe takes out his wallet and gives you the money for the tickets.

"his daughter?" You ask smiling at whezzie, you were already preparing the tickets .

Rafe didn't know why he loved hearing your voice again and directed at him..

"no, not her, just my younger sister" Rafe says, smiling at you and playing with whezzie's hair

"well...she's beautiful! Here are your tickets" you say, giving them both a huge smile, and Rafe's wish at that moment was to stick that smile to his forehead

"Thank you... Y/N" Rafe says seeing the name on a badge that was glued to his work uniform.

When you give Rafe the tickets, he and whezzie continue on their way to the cinema

"what was this?!" Whezzie asks, surprised by all the dialogue Rafe had with that strange girl

"shut up" Rafe speaks harshly to the girl and she rolls her eyes

Two weeks later

"You have to get married, Rafe! You're already a 24-year-old man, you need to start your family!"

Ward speaks angrily and authoritatively to Rafe

"and dad, I know, and yes, I'm 24 years old and I decide whether I'm going to get married or not!"

Rafe speaks in the same tone as Ward, and Ward is angry at Rafe's reactivation.

"and the name of the family that I created, in your hands! You will inherit the company, meaning you will own this family! And you need to at least have a girlfriend!!"

Ward says pointing his finger at Rafe

"they....they are difficult dad....they just care about my money" Rafe speaks, speaking more quietly and Ward simply laughs at his son's confession

"so what? Your mother married me, it wasn't because of any love but for my money"

Ward speaks, making Rafe more angry and frustrated. Rafe needed to find a girlfriend quickly, and he would go after Y/N, the one and only, to make him feel strong admiration.

And so Rafe did. He waited for you at night, behind the cinema area, to just try to have a conversation with you. And as incredible as it seemed to him, he was nervous, his hands weren't They stopped sweating, And he was biting his nails because of the anxiety. But anyway, Rafe saw you leaving through the back doors of the cinema. And he approaches you

"oh hi! Remember me?" Rafe speaks with a friendly smile so you don't have to be afraid of that strange situation

"Ah, yes. You are that beautiful little girl's older brother, am I right?"

You speak a little spitefully because it was just the two of you in that place, and it was also night and it would probably rain in less than an hour

"yes! Yes, despite that, I'm Rafe" Rafe says, raising his hand to shake and you accept

Rafe didn't say his last name, because he was afraid that if you heard the word "Cameron" you would probably stay with him because of the money, so he decided to test

"well... Rafe... I'm still trying to understand, what do you want from me?" You say crossing your arms and looking deeply at Rafe

"Would you mind going out with me? I... just admired you at that counter"

Rafe speaks with a bit of a stutter, so you decide to let your guard down and try to sympathize with him.

"well...I accept, I just don't expect you to be some kind of psychopath" you say making this joke and you both end up laughing

"good... so can you give me your number, so we can arrange a meeting?" Rafe says, approaching you and smelling that sweet perfume

"okay" you say, taking a pen from your bag and pulling Rafe's palm, that's where you would sign the number

Rafe liked that, he liked your attitude, as a woman.

To be continued?

[bedtimegiraffe]

I finally figured out why all the party members in Book 2 come out as so frustratingly self-focused to me.

It's not because they're all struggling with their own stuff. It's all about shelving your agenda- that thing in a relationship where you go, 'You need my support right now, so we're going to worry about my thing later.'

And MC does this constantly.

I just barely escaped death and found out a year passed, but is Kade recovered from the Shadow Court?

I just almost drowned, but it's time to comfort this owlbear cub and unpack Valax's trauma!

I just almost died twice to the Ash Empress, but is Nia coping with being corrupted okay?

Which can be okay. Shelving your agenda is part of a healthy relationship of any kind.

The problem is that no one does it back. I think Tyril and Nia kind of sum up the whole group's attitude:

But I don't think MC was ever going to be 'ready.' Someone else was always going to have to 'unshelve' it for them and make an effort to put the focus on MC.

Now, adventurers don't tend to be particularly well adjusted people. The full party has got maybe 1.5 healthy childhoods and 4 living parents between them (judged pretty generously). But it still feels like the others can't get it together enough to ask if MC is okay. Not that MC really makes it easy! I see MC as someone who is so used to pushing their feelings down to focus on whatever work is in front of them, they almost can't access their own emotions.

Which is why we had the brief glimpses of panic and the breakdown moment in Chapter 17. I think the breakdown makes sense mechanically. Kade is the one character your MC is guaranteed to have a strong connection to and this way it's not gated behind any diamond choices (like some really crucial character moments with Aerin and Valax, no I'm not bitter about it). But that makes it feel like the whole party has been neglecting MC while Kade immediately sees MC and goes, "Dude, you are not okay. Talk to me.'

And MC tries to turn it into comforting Kade! Kade has to actively argue with MC to make them actually acknowledge that they're having a hard time.

MC for some reason can't or won't talk about their own trauma and Kade (who's only been around for 5 minutes) is the one who has to actively force the issue for MC's own good. Which is not a great look for the rest of the found family.

Afterward, Mal and Nia both seem to address it without really getting the point. Mal says, "We know things didn't go the way any of us wanted." (Which could mean... anything. But I'm feeling generous.)

Protecting MC from death is not an equivalent exchange to talking about feelings! It is in fact dodging the feelings by focusing on practicalities again! Y'all better get it together in Book 3, I swear.

Overall, MC constantly delays addressing their own vulnerability and issues to focus on everyone else. And the others don't know how to do the same thing for MC, so the pattern just gets more engrained and damaging.

Except for Kade, my perfect boy.

Sources (they're fun, I promise!):

Screenshots from Neckrone Shen's playthroughs of Blades on YouTube, my go-to for whenever I can't remember something or don't have the screenshots myself.

I think @oh-so-youre-a-nerd's incredible piece 'Take Take Take' kept rattling around in my head until I figured out how to articulate why it felt this way: https://www.tumblr.com/oh-so-youre-a-nerd/736449955360899072/take-take-take?source=share

The language of 'shelving your agenda' came from the very good Cinema Therapy video about Kristoff from Frozen:

[rightdowntothedirtywork]

LONGLEGS (2024) Dir. Osgood Perkins ‘This is a cruel world, especially for the little things.’

LONGLEGS is a psychological thriller/horror film released earlier this year in 2024. Following in the footsteps of similar 90s FBI procedurals such as CURE (1997), Silence of the Lambs (1992) and SE7EN (1995), it follows a young FBI agent Lee Harker as she attempts to solve a string of familicides in 90s Oregon.

The film received a lot of publicity upon first being announced, being hailed as the ‘scariest film in the last 50 years’, which was only furthered by an incredible marketing campaign audience members could be involved in, such as calling the titular villain and cracking coded files to uncover crime scene photos, seemingly sent to you directly by the villain himself (which I managed to get from when I was involved with this before the movie came out);

The film was created by Osgood Perkins, the son of 60s horror darling, Anthony Perkins, who’s family life with Perkins’ mother informed the overarching 'meaning' behind the film.

Perkins' father died on September 12, 1992, from complications related to AIDS. He had been diagnosed with the disease a few years earlier but kept his illness private for most of his life. His mother, the talented Berry Berenson, also tragically lost her life in the September 11th attacks in 2001. In conversation with Vulture, Perkins reflects on his family life and the ways in which these experiences shaped his creative process in developing LONGLEGS:

““Mothers can craft stories,” he says as we loop along a lake and he looks toward the looming Cathedral Mausoleum, home to the remains of Peter Lorre and Rudolph Valentino. (For all his dry affect and working-director gear, with scruff and a baseball cap, Perkins still gives the occasional gleam of matinee-idol drama.) “They can tell their kids a version of what’s going on in their life or in the lives of their parents. And it’s done compassionately, protectively. And it’s not great.” In Longlegs, Agent Lee Harker (Monroe) gets assigned to investigate a series of murders with supernatural implications that are revealed to have a connection to details she never understood about her own childhood. In the character of Lee’s mother, Ruth (Alicia Witt), who raised her daughter alone and whose religiousness contains an off-key note, Perkins sees something personal about the domestic mythology his own mother wove. “My father was a homosexual man, or at least a bisexual man, who had a life that wasn’t reconcilable with his family life. For us, growing up, we just weren’t given that language. We weren’t given that access. Instead, there was a narrative put on things about what the family was like and how we were together and how my dad was. The challenge of rectifying what I felt I understood and what I was being told is the genesis for the mother that chooses to be complicit in a story.”

LONGLEGS quickly became one of my favorite films from the moment I first watched it. I remember leaving the cinema and immediately adding it to my (previously very stubbornly unchanging) Letterboxd top 4. I found its exploration of the themes surrounding the sheltering from the harsh truths of the world, particularly through the conversations between the secondary antagonist, Ruth Harker, and her sheltered, emotionally immature daughter, Lee, to be highly relatable.

Lee, who was raised in a Catholic environment with her mother working as a nurse, is suggested to have been sheltered as a direct result of this upbringing. Ruth's desire to protect Lee from the harsh realities of life culminates in the films final act, where it's revealed that she is collaborating with LONGLEGS - or Dale Cobble - to murder families after making a pact with the Devil to safeguard Lee from an eternity in Hell. Earnestly telling a panicked Harker that, “If they don't die, then we will burn … and twist, and burn … and twist, in hell. Forever and ever.”

Lee was incredibly relatable to me, but so was her mother, in a way. Having experienced a form of Religious mania as a child, I could easily see myself growing up like Ruth if not for the timely intervention of others around me.

Although it was probably unintentional, the film resonated with me as someone who was raised Catholic. In Catholic schools, particularly in Ireland, the teachings often leaned more towards fearmongering than actual 'this is why you should be comforted by the afterlife!' lessons.

I vividly remember being terrified of burning in Hell for even the smallest mistakes—like not blessing myself when passing a church, failing to say my prayers, mispronouncing Irish during hymns, or living in sin (as a nine year old).

The imagery of genuine horror, unease and brainwashing that comes in this film is very familiar and haunting to me, and I really enjoyed it. Unlike the older women I saw on the way out the moment Cobble mentioned Satan by name, which I guess still isn't capable of a soft landing in Irish cinemas.

[glassedice]

Well, today's my birthday, and it couldn't be more fitting for the closure of a decade.

These last three years were filled with joy, wins, losses, pain, and overall, a big adventure both online and in real life. In an era where I'm still struggling with mild symptoms of PTSD, and aftereffects of highly traumatic events that's costed me friendships for as long as I existed. I've met incredible people with interests I didn't think they could match mine in an oddly specific way, believing I was the only one in the planet and subsequently made me feel alone, just me and my sister. It seems I was wrong.

From geopolitics, to cinema, to niche games, and now psychology. A whole range of interests that kept me studying a long time about, which became another way to keep rediscovering more about my persona and improve traits I would leave in the past in favor of better ones; I've been let down for so long trying to understand myself, my mistakes, my flaws, and how I could change it, how I could get through the hard times even I brought myself upon.

And now, after three particularly strong years, I believe I found closure. I discovered enough about me, and what my next moves are going to be from this point onward.

All thanks to my family, to my sister who's been absolutely supportive to fight my lack of vision and emotional scars, and for all the singular people I've met that made me change the way I see the world for the better.

Among those, I want to thank @sillynightmarearbiter for the objective analysis she's brought for an odd game as Azur Lane that's kept me interested for as long as I could remember. Her content is what made me create a Tumblr to begin with, and what would also become a key factor for me to keep introspecting about myself and what I want. Her content, which so far has been amazing and consistent with herself, has brought me joy and kept me entertained in a time when I was at one of the lowest I've been in my life (of which I won't give much details, except saying it brought me horrible mental scars).

Through her, I discovered more than what I hoped for, and far from being a bad thing, it was an amazing load of content I didn't expect to find in a place as specific as Tumblr, more so about niche interests and singular points of view I wouldn't think of finding anywhere except in me. It made me feel less lonely and cornered into a distorted view of reality I've realized it was far from being healthy and more of a stubborn hermit unwilling to change.

Through the many people I discovered in this platform I used to think they were nothing but a myth in a sad world as this one, I found loads of motivation to keep going, to get rid of old tendencies that costed me emotional stability in favor of bad status quo (as hard as it's going to be), to give me strength to avoid keeping these thoughts to rot on myself, and overall, a chance to heal my psychological wounds.

About AL, there's also a certain character that has actually brought me a boost of motivation in my life, and could say they genuinely helped me get a hold myself, but I won't say who it is right now 🥴

I am, and will always be forever grateful to everyone here that's given me the final push I needed to pursue my goals and leave behind bad habits that kept me stagnant far too long, as painful as it's going to be getting off them right now.

Without further ado, get well everyone. Hoping for nicer days to come.

[harrison-abbott]

quirks of the head

My ex-wife called me up. Said that the boiler had broken back in the house and she was wondering whether I could come and help out. I was a joiner. So I knew how to fix such things. But I also hadn’t heard from Sarah in eight months. And we’d broken up a year earlier, and I was still butchered about it. You know when you despise somebody after they’d hurt you? There’s this inward, guttural sense of imagination where you fantasise about going back and killing them, throttling them and watching the panicky tears roll as they suffocate. That’s what I did with Sarah, anyway; maybe other people aren’t as dark.

I had a son, Nick, who lived with her. Back at the house. He was still in school and I used to take him to the football but this year he stopped coming to the games with me. I’d seen Nick a few times when we went to the cinema. I bought him popcorn and coke and the films we saw were these colossal spectacles about superheroes which I was bamboozled by. Nor was I sure whether Nick even liked them because he barely ate much of the popcorn and when I drove him home he said about ten words and didn’t make eye contact.

Nick wasn’t at home, the day Sarah asked me to come and mend the boiler. He was off on a trip with his girlfriend and their parents. I’d never actually met the girlfriend. Meh. So when I was driving back to the house where I’d lived for sixteen years, I knew it would only be Sarah and I, one-on-one for the first time in eight months. As I drove I thought about turning back. Get her to call another joiner. Why should I do it for free? But I kept going. And eventually I was turning into the neighbourhood where I once thought I would raise a life-long family. 

I parked outside of the house. And walked up to the front door with my tools and I knocked on it and this was odd because it was the only time I had ever knocked on my front door.

Sarah opened it and when I saw her this great vacuum of sadness and relief exhausted me.

“Hello,” she said.

“Hi there,” I responded.

There was no hug or kiss or anything other than her moving away from the doorframe and allow me to come in and shut the door behind me and then she went into the kitchen and I followed her and then she asked me if I'd like a cup of tea and I said no even though I wanted one and then I asked her what the problem with the boiler was. She said she didn't know. So I don't know why I queried, knowing she wouldn’t no. The difficulty with the machine was fairly simple. I’d seen it hundreds of times throughout my lame career and I felt bad about charging people money to fix a simple thing.

Sarah hovered in the background. It’s quite an odd feeling, isn’t it: having somebody you have powerful emotions for watch you? Even if you aren’t camera shy (which I’m not; I can grin in photos just like most goofy folks) it can make you fidget and disturb your emotion when somebody’s watching you. And I was wondering what was going through her head as I was fiddling with the boiler and neither of us had said anything for ten minutes. And then she said,

“Sure you don’t want a cup of tea?”

“No thanks,” I said.

She said okay and then she went and sat in the living room at the far end of the house.

Leaving me alone with the boiler. I got it turned back on again. And tested it at the wall; and the woosh and tremble of the machine restarted. A delight flew through me. Even though I’d restored boilers so many times I had done it again and I was no famous man or talented man or likeable man and my family life was in tatters, I had fixed something once more.

I put my tools back into my bag.

Sarah was still in the living room. I arrived in the doorway and she twitched when she saw me and I found it hard to look at her. She was as old as I was. We were the same age; but I’d aged worse then here; I had my belly and greasy grey hair and I seemed to have shrunk, somehow, a good deal; and when I looked at her, now, she still had these attributes when we were kids, the same hint of yellow hair and that dainty nose. Those little quirks of the head – the way she moved her skull – that I used to adore. And they made me ashamed of all the beer in my stomach from last night and so I hung back a little in the frame so she wouldn’t notice the fat contours.

“That’s the boiler up and working again,” I said to her.

She began to get up.

“Don’t get up, Sarah, it’s fine. It’s all up and running once more.”

“Thanks Hon,” she said.

The blood had quickened in my arms and all across my body. It’s quite hard to express love when you don’t know the person the narrator’s talking about or you’ve never seen them.

I didn’t want her or Nick to be cold. And was glad that I’d helped them out with that.

Sarah got up from the sofa as I was heading to the front door and I opened it and went out into the rushing afternoon air. She said she was really grateful for me coming over and her words were like being battered with a hammer, just to hear them again, they were prettily blunt and bashing.

And I still could not look at her; the image was too agonising. So I said it was no problem and I was all happy to help.

I got into my car and drove away. And felt less cold, after my helpful deed, in the present age.  

[mountttmase]

HI HI HIIII

AMTC 2 CHAPTER 3🥹 DATE NIGHTTT

‘Nope, not a thing. Hence why I’m not sure what to wear’ OH POOR GIRL 😭😂

‘I’ve never really understood what that means’ you told her, flicking through your wardrobe. ‘Like what’s constitutes a nice top? And are jeans not too casual?’ Y/N WEAR WHAT YOU WANT HE IS ALREADY AT YOUR FEETS😌

‘Don’t talk about my man like that’ you laughed in mock offence, knowing she was joking but it made you a little smug knowing she thought Mason was attractive. MY MAN🩷🩷

‘That’s the thing though, it’s Mason. I haven’t felt like this about anyone else. Haven’t been on a proper grown up adult date ever like this is all a lot’ OH BABY LOVE🥹🥹🥹

‘So he comes to the door rather than texts you from the car? Old school, I like it’ she winked and you laughed as you picked up your phone and made your way to the door. ‘Have the best time, yeah? And wear protection!’ She shouted and you flipped her off before hanging up. After a few quick breaths you answered the door with a smile and the sight you were met with caused your heart to flutter. WE ALL LIKE A GENTLEMEN 😌

‘Hey, you all ready to go?’ He smiled and you nodded at him before locking the door up behind you and following him to the car. He opened up the door for you to get in but just before you had the chance he pulled you to him and brushed a little bit of hair out of your face. ‘Are you okay?’ MY BIG LOVES

THE FACT THAT HE KNEW SHE WAS NERVOUSSSS

‘Well you didn’t need to. You could of worn a rubbish bag and I wouldn’t of cared’ he told you before reaching for your hand and kissing the back of it. ‘But you look beautiful’ he murmured and you felt yourself go hot all over. TOLD YOU

‘So I thought long and hard about where to take you tonight. I didn’t wanna take you somewhere random so I’m taking you to a place that’s pretty special to me’ he told you, squeezing your hand lightly as you stopped in front of a cute Italian restaurant. ‘I come here all the time with my family, they sort of know us in here but I’ve never bought a girl before’ he laughed, looking down at you with a nervous smile. ‘We come here for birthdays and anniversaries. Wins, losses, you name it. I hope this is okay’ YOU LOST MEEEEE

THE WAY EVERYONE LOVES HIM IN THE RESTAURANT

‘Well here she is’ Mason laughed and you felt yourself blush at his words. SCREAMING

HIM REASSURING HER IMMEDIATELY ABOUT THE PAYMENT 😭😭

AND HIM KNOWING SHE LOVES A SWEET TREAT

I NEED TO GO TO THAT CINEMA, THAT'S ALL I'M SAYING

‘I can tell’ he whispered, bumping his nose against the side of your head before kissing your temple. ‘I love it when you get sassy’ WE ALL LOVE OUR SASSY QUEEN

‘I am too’ he whispered before dipping his head to kiss you gently. You wanted to kiss him deeper but you were aware of where you were and who you were with so you took what he gave you knowing you could hopefully get more from him later. SHE WANTS MORE, AND WE CAN'T BLAME HER

He kept teasing you the whole way through, kissing any part of your skin he could reach and stroking his hands over your thighs and waist to the point you had to smack his hands away and tell him to concentrate on the movie as he was missing the best part. You also didn’t know how much more you could handle of him touching you without doing something about it. MOUNTTT🫠🫠🫠

THAT KISS....IT'S HOR IN THERE, ISN'T IT?

‘Sorry’ he laughed, kissing your nose as he ran his thumb under your bottom lip. ‘Got a bit carried away there. You ready to go?’ BABY BOY

OMG HE REMEMBERED THE MILKSHAKE

‘I guess five minutes won’t hurt’ he told you before following you inside. ‘I’ve only ever really been in here once I think’ YAAAAYYYY

‘It’s not that I don’t want to, you know… I just don’t wanna rush things’ he explained, kissing your arm gently. ‘And I know if I stay here any longer I’ll never make it to training in the morning’ he laughed which made you smile a bit. ‘Ah there we go, that’s my favourite smile’ he teased which only caused you to laugh more as he pulled you into a hug. ‘We’ll see each other soon though yeah?’ THE FACT THAT HE WAS ACTUALLY SCARED OF HER LEAVING AGAIN KILLS ME

OMG I LOVE THESE TWO

AMD NEXT CHAPTER IS GOING TO BE INTERESTING 😌🤭

Omg I’m so slow with these I’m so sorry hahaha

I loved their little date and she wanted him to stay so bad 🥺 but you’re right, next one will be interesting 🤭

[theveryfires]

goodnight, blood sucker | eddie munson x reader

summary: robin and steve are stuck with closing up family video, what they didn't expect was to catch the freak and the babysitter leaving a late night showing of lost boys.

an: this is a continuation of my other fic 'head over heals' but it can be read without that part if you haven't seen it! i do reference shrek 2 in this, i couldn't help myself! ALSO i just wanted to say a quick thank you so much for all the love recently, the fact people enjoy my silly stories is mad and i am so grateful to everyone! anyways, enjoy!!

Hawkins was quiet, it’s streets lowly lit as the final dregs of cinema goers poured out the front doors. Robin and Steve were across the street, just finishing closing up after Keith made them stay late to reorganise the horror section. Steve was grumbling about something, but his complaining came to a halt when Robin whacked him in the arm repeatedly. “Hey! Hey! what was that for?!” But Robin didn’t spare him a second glance, her eyes stuck on the pair across the street, their laughter rippling through the night. “Shut up dingus, look!?!” Steve rolled his eyes, huffing when Robin elbowed him in the stomach (he never got away with anything.) But as he was about to respond, or at least complain about yet again being called ‘dingus’, he finally realised what Robin was going on about. 

Across the street, slowly making their way out of the cinema was Eddie ‘the freak’ Munson and Y/n L/n. She had been in Steve’s english class, always sitting at the back and usually paired with Munson in the hope she could be a good influence. She had helped Nancy out with a few things for the paper, mainly writing fictional stories for the back page. Y/n had been kept behind with Eddie after failing the maths final at least four times now. Steve didn’t remember much about her at high school, the two only coming into contact after he got closer with Dustin, with her being Henderson’s babysitter since she was 15. The whole Upside Down business had obviously involved y/n, with her following Dustin after he snuck out one night to help Steve. They were friends, sort of, maybe? At school she was usually in the library, but Robin had noticed Eddie driving her home every night, and walking with her to every class. He would rush off at lunch, leaving his loyal minions behind to meet her by her locker. It was cute. 

But now, this was the most emotion they had ever seen from her. She was doubled over laughing, a bright smile taking over the usual blank expression on her face. Eddie was stood in front of her, a dark look on his face as he held out his half empty slushy towards her as menacingly as he could manage. “Drink this y/n. Become one of us.” He had made his voice deep and scratchy, holding his body strangely upright, head tilted down to exaggerate the shadows cast by the flickering street lights. Eddie’s eyes narrowed, deviously twinkling in the light, y/n took the cup from his hand. As she drank the slushy, some fell down the sides of her mouth, staining it a deep red. A tinge of the slushy clung to her teeth, a symptom of the syrup collecting at the bottom, she stuck out her red tinged tongue at Eddie when she caught him staring. “Mmmm, cherry flavoured…want a taste?” 

Eddie felt like he could fly, the weight he always seemed to carry with him suddenly easier as y/n giggled up at him, breaking the serious look that she had managed to keep up for all of two minutes. He was towering over her, and took that moment to wipe the sides of her mouth with his thumb, scooping up the blood/slushy and eagerly sticking it into his own mouth. Y/n felt her face flush, leaning into his chest to hide the love stuck look in her eyes. But Eddie was having none of it, gently tilting her back towards him, missing the warmth of her eyes. He smiled gently, pressing a sticky cherry stained kiss to her forehead before locking her hand within his. 

Just as Robin and Steve thought their eyes might drop out their heads at the sweetness of the couple, y/n pulled away from Eddie whilst yelling “Goodnight, blood sucker!” She ran up the sidewalk, heart beating fiercely in her ears as she tried to sprint away from him. But she didn’t get far when she felt Eddie’s arms wrap around her waist. Twirling her around and lifting her effortlessly into the air, their laughter once more intertwined, a symphony of young love that was making the watching family video store employees feel sick. 

Eddie soon came to a stop, lowering y/n to the ground and finally getting the kiss he had been waiting for since she had barged into Wheelers basement. His heart flipped when he felt her hands grip onto his shirt, leaning up and into him with a satisfied hum. After a minute or so the pair finally pulled apart, leaning their foreheads on one another, sharing the air and grinning like love struck idiots. “Lets get you home, sweetheart. I’m pretty sure your dad will put a stake through my chest if you are late again.”  

Steve and Robin shared whilst the pair across the street disappeared around the corner. “What am I doing wrong Buckley? Even Munson has a girl!” Before Robin could answer a voice responded for her “Maybe start with not gawking at pretty ladies from under a streetlight Harrington!” Eddie’s face appeared from around the corner, sending a wink at the two before y/n tugged him back. Steve and Robin’s faces dropped, they were never going to hear the end of this one. 

[akakeiiji]

HI!~ (THIS IS MY FIRST TINE REQUESTING AND IM REALLY EXCITED) Can I request a scenario where their smol s/o (I'm like 155 or 5'1 for reference) gets easily lost? Like they just wonder off on their own cause they think that he's still with them and she tends to leave her phone with him so calling to find her is out of the question??? (Me honestly IM SORRY FRIENDS AND FAMILY) She likes a lot of things so sometimes its hard to find her cause they never know where she is? Ushi, Tsuki and Bokuto-🌼

-`,✎ Ushijima, Tsukishima and Bokuto losing their short S/O in a crowd

THIS REQUEST IS JUST TOO ADORABLE AND IT HITS SO CLOSE TO HOME!! We’re the same height nonnie 🤧🤧✋ Short gang, where ya’ll at? 

Also I apparently don’t know how to read because I thought you requested for headcanons at first despite you clearly asking for scenarios so I decided to keep the hcs since I was already halfway done with them~ hope you don’t mind, nonnie! 

The man is literally built like the empire state building, he just towers over everyone, it’s insane

And then there you are behind him, all tiny and stuff, it’s so friggin adorable

He doesn’t really notice your height difference at all

Whenever people point it out, he just cocks his head with his eyebrows furrowed and is like “Yeah, I’m tall?? And they’re short?? Why are you reacting like that?”

He’s genuinely confused and doesn’t see why it’s a big deal at all

When he looks at you he doesn’t really pick up on itty bitty details like your height and stature; he just sees you for the whole you and sees you simply as this perfect deity that he loves

But he does appreciate the perks that come with it such as the way you feel when he hugs you after a match or the way you look up at him so adorably when you’re trying to get a kiss

He also didn’t realize the cons that came with having a tiny s/o

There are many but we’re focusing on the fact that it’s so easy to lose you in a crowd

He’ll literally look away for 0.5 seconds and when he looks back at you, you’re suddenly gone

He probably won’t notice for a bit but after a while, he’ll wonder why you aren’t holding onto his sleeve or hand anymore

Whenever this happens he usually goes about it in two ways; he’d either stay still where he is and let you find him (which isn’t hard, he sticks out like a sore thumb) or if enough time passes, he’ll retrace his steps and look for you himself

He’ll have a tiny little frown on his face since he gets so worried about you, like you’re so tiny what if you get trampled??

When he does find you though, the wide smile on your face when you catch sight of him honestly makes the search worth it

can you tell that I miss ushi so friggin much

The streets in downtown Tokyo are always so packed at this time of day. There were hundreds of people rushing to and from work, tourists taking in the sights, and busy shoppers such as yourself and Ushijima; you two had just finished shopping together and were heading to your favorite restaurant in the area as you always do to end your date night.

Your hand remained tightly wrapped around the hem of your boyfriend’s coat as you two made your way down the busy streets, struggling to not get pulled away as people continued to mercilessly push past you. You would have much rather held Ushijima’s hand but he insisted on carrying all your shopping bags and was rather preoccupied with them at that moment.

He marched on, oblivious to your struggles behind him. It was during times like this when you hated how short your legs were, you were practically jogging to keep up with your boyfriend who, to him, was only going at a leisurely pace.

Before you knew it, your hand had loosened and you suddenly lost hold of his coat. You looked up, hoping to find him just a few feet away, but he had disappeared into the sea of people all around you.

Ushijima hadn’t noticed anything at first, he was too focused on where he was going to realize that the little tugs on the hem of his coat throughout the journey were suddenly gone. He looked down at both his hands and placed the shopping bags on one of them to the other so that he could use it to hold your own.

He held out his free hand behind him, calling out your name, and motioned for you to grab it. A few seconds went by of him gesturing like this only to be met with no response.

He looked back, eyebrows furrowed, only to find no sign of you.

Ushijima immediately stops in his tracks, eyes widening ever so slightly as he did a little 360 turn in his spot, raking over the crowds rushing past him in hopes he’d find your familiar head of hair bouncing about.

He stood motionless where he was, forcing people to walk around him—most wanted to tell him off for standing in the middle of the street but no one had the balls to.

A few minutes went by and he began walking down the direction he came from looking everywhere for you. Worry began to bubble in him when you were still nowhere to be found but suddenly he saw a figure waving at him from afar.

You were standing on top of those small cement blocks on the bottom street lights, waving your free hand that wasn’t wrapped around the lamp towards your boyfriend, grinning ear to ear when you met eyes with him.

Ushijima smiled in relief, shoulders relaxing as he made his way over to you. You met him halfway, immediately wrapping your arms around him in a hug, burying your face into his chest.

“I’m never letting go of your hand next time.” He said, pressing a chaste kiss on the top of your head before interlocking your fingers together. You laughed, nodding in agreement. “Definitely not.”

We all already know this: Kei is fucking ruthless

It doesn’t matter that you’re dating. It doesn’t matter that you’re literally his favorite person in the world tho he’ll never admit this to you you will not be free from his savageness

No one is more hyper-aware of your height difference than he is and no one teases you more than him

Tsukishima is literally the type to steal your things and hold them over your head or he’ll purposefully stand at full height whenever you want to kiss him just so that he can watch you struggle

“Oh, babe, I didn’t see you from down there.”

Is the type to purposefully put things you use all the time up on the top shelves in cupboards and cabinets

He says that he does this to annoy but really he does this so that you can call him to help you since he banned you from climbing the counters 🤧✋

He really loves your height though as much as he likes to tease you for it

He loves how easy it is to wrap his arms around you and how you burrow into his chest whenever you hug

His favorite thing about your height is probably the fact that it’s so comfortable being the big spoon with you since you fit so snuggly against him 🥺

again he’ll never tell you this, my man is tight-lipped

However he can get very protective over you, it’s like he developed this idea in this head that small = fragile

So whenever he loses track of you in a crowd (which happens a lot, it's honestly embarrassing) he immediately drops everything and searches for you

He’ll have this permanent pout on his face as he retraces his steps, going back to wherever you two were and keeping an eye out for either you or places that would catch your eye

Once he finally catches you, he’d sigh in relief and immediately put up his “i’m annoyed right now, give me attention” face and head over to you, knocking your head with his knuckles lightly

He’d lecture you a bit about staying close to him and he’d spend the rest of your time out with his eye on you and with his hand tightly wrapped around your own

The mall was always so crowded during the weekend especially now that Christmas was just around the corner. Tsukishima told you that you two should visit the mall later during the week but you were just so excited to see this new movie, he simply couldn’t say no; he cursed himself for being so tightly wrapped around your finger.

The building was already pretty full when you two entered the cinema but when you two emerged, it was as if the number of people there seemed to double in just a span of a few hours.

As you two made your way through the tight-knit crowds of people, the frown on Tsukishima’s face never left as people kept pushing and rushing past him. He called out your name behind him and said, “See, I told you we should have come after the weekend, it’s like half the city is here right now.”

He waited for your usual giggle or scoff, maybe a light smack on his arm as you tell him to brighten up but there wasn’t any of that.

“(Y/N)? Did you hear me? I—(Y/N?),” He turned around, worried that you may have been upset at him but instead was surprised to find that you weren’t trailing along behind him like he expected you to be.

He turned around fully, hands coming out of his pocket as he raked his eyes over the crowds of people around him. It would be nearly impossible to find you here, there were probably hundreds of people in the mall now.

Tsukishima groaned slightly as he ran a hand through his locks, his other hand going into his pant pocket to ring your phone only to realize that it was with him as well, right next to his. This elicited a second groan from the blonde.

Knowing you, you probably got distracted by something and wandered away from him.

He retraced his steps, keeping a close eye on his surroundings. He had no idea when you wandered away from him so you could have been anywhere. He stood at full height, towering over the majority of the crowd, and scanned the entirety of the floor and the shops on it.

He entered a few stores he knew you’d most likely visit; the bookstore, the pet store, and a shop that was having a 50% sale but he found no traces of you.

Tsukishima was about to give up and head to the information desk and ask them to announce something on the loudspeaker to grab your attention—probably something along the lines of “To the small gremlin wandering around floor three right now, please meet Tsukishima Kei at the main exit.”—when he spotted a bright store on the other side of the floor.

You were there. He just knew it.

He rolled his eyes as he made his way to the anime store and low and behold, there you were, crouching as you stared at the shelves of anime merchandise, a wide ear to ear grin on your face.

Tsukishima sighed and lightly smacked you, tearing you away from your thoughts and making you look up at him in shock.

“You are such an idiot, (Y/N).” You only laughed in response and wrapped your arms around his waist and pressed your face onto his chest. “Aww, Kei! Were you worried about me?”

“Of course, I was. How do you expect me to feel?” He said with another roll of his eyes. He brought his hand up and placed it on top of your head. “I was worried someone thought you were a child and kidnapped you.”

You let out an indignant gasp and started to smack him but he only laughed and took your hand in his, dragging you out of the store behind him ignoring your protests.

Nobody in the whole entire world thinks you’re more adorable than Bokuto

He adores the fact that you’re so tiny, he likes you call you his pocket-sized s/o  

He never really teases you, instead he always coos and coddles you

He especially loves lifting you up in his arms and twirling you around, he always does this after winning a game and it always leaves you feeling dizzy

But you never complain bc who would complain about being hugged by Kou like that 🤧✋

However, as much as Bokuto loves how smol you are, he always kinda forgets that you’re short??

It’s because he’s always surrounded by tall people; his friends, the volleyball team, etc.

So he always forgets to adjust when he’s with you

And you know how some people just naturally walk really really fast, like they can’t help it, it’s just how they walk normally??

Yeah, that’s Bokuto

And this paired with the fact that he is literally 6’1 means he practically travels at light speed

Your tiny legs can barely keep up with your excitable boyfriend and you’re always practically jogging to keep up with him so if you take your eyes off of him for even just a few seconds he’ll probably run off somewhere and disappear 😔✋

This occurs so often when you two are out that you’re never shocked whenever it happens

It takes a few minutes before Bokuto realizes that he’s suddenly alone in a crowd and that you aren’t beside him like he thought you would be

AND IM SORRY BUT THE FIRST THING HE’LL DO IS JUST YELL OUT YOUR NAME REPEATEDLY AT FULL VOLUME WITH NO SHAME WHATSOEVER

“(Y/N)!! WHERE ARE YOU??”

Everyone around him would give him looks but he wouldn’t care, he just needs to find you fast or he’ll start panicking tho he lowkey already is

Some people would think that he’s looking for his kid but nah, he’s just looking for his smol s/o who would show up beside him after a while with a disgruntled look on their face

It never takes long for you two to reunite when you get separated, you just have to wait for the distinctive voice of your boyfriend yelling for you somewhere

When you two find each other, the first thing he’ll do is pull you into a tight hug, usually lifting you up from the ground as he presses a few kisses on your cheeks in relief

He’ll remember to walk slowly for the rest of the time you’re out, usually with his arm over your shoulder or with his hand tightly wrapped around your own

It made absolutely no sense to you that Bokuto literally grew up in the city yet has never visited the amusement park in the area before. You’ve visited the park countless times before but for your boyfriend, it was a first.

Bokuto was practically bouncing with excitement ever since you proposed the idea of visiting the amusement park together and it only got more intense as the day of your visit grew closer and closer.

You somewhat regretted not pushing your date to a later day in the week so that it didn’t fall on the weekend since the park was so packed but that feeling quickly dissipated when you glanced at your beaming boyfriend beside you.

What you did regret however was the fact that you didn’t wear more comfortable shoes, ones that were more fitting for exercise rather than leisurely walks since you were practically running around the park just to keep up with Bokuto.

His hand remained tightly clasped on your own as he sprinted all around the park, looking at all the rides, food stands, and gift shops around the place. He wasn’t really running, he was simply walking at a quick pace but this coupled with his long legs made it so difficult to match his pace with your significantly shorter ones.

You two had just gotten off a rather intense roller coaster and you felt your head spin from how dizzy it made you, you halted in your steps as Bokuto was about to begin running towards another ride making Bokuto stop as well as he was pulled back by your hand which was still holding onto his.

“Koutarou, let me rest for a bit,” You said as you sat on a bench in the shade, Bokuto immediately nodded and took a seat beside you, he handed you a bottle of water from his bag. “Sure babe, here drink this.”

After a few minutes of talking and resting under the shade, you stood up, reinvigorated, and filled with more energy. “Okay, let’s go, I’m feeling much better now,”

Bokuto immediately jumped onto his feet and beamed at you, more than ready for another round of rollercoasters and thrilling rides. He held out his hand for you to take and you two headed farther into the park.

“Let’s go on the Viking ride next—wait, hold on, let me fix this.” You let go of your boyfriend’s hand and began adjusting the overpriced headband on your head; Bokuto insisted on buying matching ones at the gift shop despite their ridiculous price (“Look, it’s just so adorable!”)

When you looked up, ready to grab ahold of his hand again, Bokuto was suddenly nowhere to be seen.

You whipped your head all around you but you couldn’t see the familiar head of hair of your boyfriend in the horde of people around you. You stood on your tiptoes, craning your head to get a better view but that didn’t do anything to help. You feel back on your feet and huffed; curse you and your short stature.

You walked down the direction you two were originally headed at, raking your eyes over the crowds of people you walked past when you suddenly heard a familiar voice yelling out your name from a distance. You whipped your head towards the direction of the voice and began to jog towards it.

Bokuto was standing on his tiptoes, his hands cupping his mouth as he called out for you over and over again, oblivious to the looks of shock from the people around him.

As he was about to scream out your name for the dozenth time, you suddenly pushed your way through the people around him and grabbed ahold of his arm, an exasperated yet also relieved look on your face.

Bokuto’s face immediately lit up, the small frown on his lips turning into a large smile as he wrapped his arms around you. He pressed you into his chest and lifted you off the ground as he usually does when he hugs you.

You giggled and flailed around as he did this, when he placed you back safely on the ground, he placed a small kiss on your forehead.

“Sorry for leaving you behind,” Bokuto said as he laced his fingers onto your own, “It won’t happen again,”

You scoffed playfully and let yourself be dragged along by him, “That’s what you said last time, Kou.”

[itsamiraculous]

Solitude

There are a lot of references to Gorizilla and Origins in Mr Pigeon 72, Sole Crusher and Queen Banana. I think they are all leading into the same thing, but aren’t as blatantly obvious as what we have seen in the other S4 episodes.

In Mr. Pigeon 72 Marinette as Ladybug is wearing a towel like her disguise in Gorizilla. 

The rest lies under the cut as it is long

We also have the same dialogue of Alya and Marinette as in Gorizilla between Tikki and Marinette “aren’t you forgetting something?” as Marinette is wearing her pyjamas still, needing to head to the pool etc.

There mob of people running after him with the initiated use of social media, it also so happens that they are trying to film a new eau de parfum ad, there was one released in Gorizilla.

In Sole Crusher adds details to solitude, that Andre is the one who made the film, this leads into Queen Banana where Andre is constantly trying to get recognition over being the director of Solitude.

Gorizilla is where we first get introduced to Solitude and also where Emilie is being kept. 

Also in Queen Banana there is the blatant parallel to having a Gorilla, and his first place that he goes to destroy is the Cinema

In Queen Banana Zoe as Vesperia said “pick on someone your own size”, this is literally what Chat Noir says in Gorizilla. This is also similar to what Chat says to Stoneheart as well.

Zoe also didn’t believe she was cut out for the task, this is the same thing that Marinette went through, both Tikki and Chat Noir assured her that she was, though arguably Chat Noir’s speech was more affective. Zoe said that she wasn’t strong enough, Marinette thought she wasn’t the right person for the job. There is obviously more context with Zoe’s conflict than what happened with Marinette as well, but I couldn’t help but feel the nostalgia of the Origins episodes.

Then in Mr. Pigeon, it is rather evident with the reverse umbrella scene.

ack, the quality of Mr Pigeon 72 is nothing in comparison to the Origins, dang.

The amount that Zoe reflects both Adrien and Chloe in general is astounding. In the case of Sole Crusher though, I want to talk apropos of Adrien. Not having many friends, used to have only one, first day at school, the association with Chloe making people immediately judge. They are actually lovely human beings who just wants to help people.

So, why is this happening? 

Well, miraculous always has episodes that directly parallel, or make a lot of references for a reason. The reason why I point this out about these specifically is because these are 3 episodes, 2 only directly feeding one into the other, and I mean the stigma around Solitude especially is a big deal! It usually indicates that something is going to come up. 

I would argue that the reverse umbrella scene is something on it’s own, because it’s to do with the romance arc, however everything seems to lead to the same thing; Solitude. Even the mobs and ads, because it’s all part of Adrien being the Gabriel brand, not his own person, as he was feeling trapped. Seeing Solitude he felt like he would become closer to his mother as he didn’t believe Gabriel would allow him to see it. The towel used as a disguise, and also Ladybug was losing her marbles, arguably thinking she has to figure everything out on her own. The umbrella we have theorized as a fandom that it is the same umbrella used in the film.

Then the bigger picture is still solitude, except the more literal sense. I pointed out that Zoe’s concerns mirrored that of Ladybug/Marinette, you can feel alone in those emotions. Ladybug told Zoe that she knew she could do it, Chat Noir told Ladybug that it was because of them that Chloe was still alive, that they would be able to prove themselves, that she wasn’t alone. 

Sole Crusher is also a clever play on words with your soul being crushed which is what happened with Zoe and also with Andre that he had to change his dreams because it’s what his family wanted. With that you can feel isolated, judged by your own family. In Queen Banana Ladynoir make comments of them being the best duo et cetera which can paint some red flags, but as Adrien, Adrien inadvertently has ended his friendship with Chloe. I know in Optygami Chloe still seeks out refuge behind him, but it’s because they still care, like how Kagami still saves Adrien. 

We know that Chat Noir has been increasingly sidelined and Ladybug had to reassure him in Guiltrip that she didn’t say it often enough that she needs him and wouldn’t be able to do anything without him. 

Chat Noir I don’t think will be convinced for long, especially with what’s happening with Rena Rouge. Rena literally appeared in Mr Pigeon 72, gave advice to Ladybug straight from the grinoire and helps her understand her powers more. I know Adrien may have not been able to hear, and they don’t know he’s Chat Noir, but they also saved the day without him, they still needed Plagg, but he was not there. Everything is increasing.

Remember how isolation and feeling trapped (as Adrien) and not being loved and respected by Ladybug (as Chat Noir) are his greatest fears. 

I thought it was strange how they were drawing a lot of attention to Chat Noir being more jovial. You hear it a lot more with these S4 episodes that Chat Noir has been having a lot more fun as Chat Noir, and even says it to Ladybug. There is a reason why the crossover of patrols and him telling her the best times he has is when he is with her. They want it to stick. 

There is also an emphasis on how Adrien is done with being “Adrien”

Everything is leading into Chat Noir/ Adrien being sidelined and isolated. I’ve just read a post as well about how Chat Blanc was not sorted, it had just been delayed. It may also be for different reasons as well, more about the love and respect that Ladybug never showed him. 

There is a theme of divide as well. I mean the whole film they try making in Queen Banana is a reflection of what is bound to happen. The Superhero of Creation and the Supervillain of Destruction. Yikes!

The precedent was set in Truth and Lies with what’s to come; that division will happen from lies and secrets. Marinette and Adrien had their respective relationships end with Luka and Kagami because of the secrets and lies they were withholding. Increasingly Ladybug has been keeping Chat Noir in the dark, and this isn’t going to turn out well.

[sooghostwriter]

Only on the weekends

Member/Pairing: Do Kyung Soo x OC (Nameless)

Genre/Type: Mature, Romance, AU, smut.

Warnings: Full on sexy times, pegging (NOT daddy kink, NOT kink, just good old Christian pegging).

Word count: 11001 words (yikes, a third of the fic)

Notes: This story takes place wherever you want. You will see why it would be weird to center it in Korea.

Thank you to all of you who waited patiently for this last chapter. It was hard to focus on writing because of ADHD and life, but I'm glad I could finish it because I really wanted to write this scene. Scene that was the only reason why I started this fic, that then grew up a bit too much.

Also, thank you to my dear friend @thedeviousdo. Steph, thank you for answering whenever I asked you for your opinion and for fixing everything that needed to be fixed.

Summary: She is saved by a caring man from a little mishappening in the middle of the forest. A small act of kindness turns into seasons of laughs, food, fun, care, love, and sex.

Final Chapter

-Spring-

She was driving back home when she got a call from him. She pressed the answering button, and enjoyed how his voice filled her car “Hulder, I got good news”

“Are you getting a hot tub so we can have sex al fresco?” Kyung Soo snorted and told her he was still thinking about it “Anyway, as I was saying, I have good news, I got two weeks of vacations” Those were indeed good news “You got any plans, my man?”

“No, I want to stay one week at home, I have some things to do, but I don’t have plans for the other week” She offered him an idea. She told him that he could go to the city and stay with her. She had to work, but they could go out during the afternoon, and during the day he could meet his parents, friends, go to the cinema, shopping, etc. “I like it, I really like it, so this weekend, instead of you going to my place, I’m going to you”

“Sounds great, what about Baekhyun, Chanyeol, and the rest?”

“Chanyeol, the human, can stay at my house and take care of them, I need to buy food for him…so see you this Saturday morning?”

“Or Friday night” He agreed to Friday night. So instead of going home, she went to the supermarket.

Her home was clean, the heater was on, food ready to serve and Kyung Soo was parking in front of her building. She loved how he could make her feel butterflies all over her body just by smoothly getting his jeep between two city cars.

She greeted him with a long kiss. She was so happy to have him there, in her home, and for a week. This was going to be the longest they would spend together “What if this is some kind of test for our relationship and we end up hating each other?” She asked him as she served him a plate of creamy Ricotta Corn and Tomato Ziti. He grabbed a bite and took his time to praise her cooking before answering “I don’t think I could hate you, and I’m confident that this week is going to be me going out during the day, and us having sex during the night, there are a lot of surfaces we could try” He looked around nodding and took another big bite of food “Sir, I have to work, don’t forget that”

“I already thought about it, you finish work at six, I pick you up, we go out, we come back by nine, we fuck, and you are going to be sleeping by eleven” She was giggling uncontrollably “You have everything planned uh? I like it, probably I’m not going to function properly the next day, but who cares” He also shared with her his full schedule for that week. Visiting friends, going to the cinema, buying some clothes for the summer, it was a long list “It’s going to be fun” He commented cheerfully “Yeah I’m sure, you probably need to get your eyebrows done too”

“What?” He looked up from his plate, eyebrows up, eyes wide, completely lost. She kept quiet, controlling her smile “What? What do you mean? What’s wrong with my eyebrows?” He insisted, slightly annoyed, but still amused “Nothing, they are perfect, I’m sure you spend some time at the saloon fixing them”

“Are you making fun of me?” He was less annoyed now, smiling with her “A little bit, is cute” He rubbed his eyebrows, looking up “What’s with them, they are alright”

“They are perfect, I love them” He smiled and dropped the issue. But she kept giggling about it for a while.

She cleaned the table as Kyung Soo spoke with his parents, arranging breakfast and lunch with them. They knew about her, her parents knew about him, but none of their families were particularly nosy about their kid’s private life. And they weren’t in a hurry to introduce each other to their respective families.

She had just turned on the dishwasher when he walked behind her and captured her against his chest, dropping a kiss behind her ear “Wanna use one of your surfaces?” He asked, tightening his grip around her “We just ate, what about a nice walk around the neighborhood and then you fuck me”

“Sounds perfect” He dropped a kiss on her other ear and let her go so they could get ready.

As he promised. Kyung Soo picked her up at work every single day. They went on simple fun dates and then they arrived home so Kyung Soo could have his way with her. And she could have her way with him. Their time at her place made them very creative in the matters of sex. Slow, deep and messy or fast, hard and desperate. Sex where no words were needed. Sex where they kept making sure that the other was alright with what they were doing. Whenever they fucked at his place there was hunger in their movements. The first fuck of the weekend was always desperate, a bit harsh sometimes. Now it wasn't the complete opposite. It wasn't calmer, but the pace was different. They both knew that the next evening they were going to be at the same place. Time was different. Instead of enjoying the most from each other for two days, they had eight days to doing so. Although watching time pass was terrible.

By now she knew his body like hers. She could draw him by memory, with her eyes closed. She fell in love with waking up seeing his beautiful profile and going to sleep listening to his deep voice.

He left on Monday, and she felt incredibly sad to see him go. Instead of worrying about fighting with Kyung Soo after spending a week together, she should have worried about not wanting to let him go after spending a whole week with him. She got used to their casual intimacy too soon. She was missing his hand on her back as they walked inside a restaurant. His head on her shoulder when they were having breakfast.

She loved the small gestures and the soft displays of care. Always tender, always natural, and most of the time with a message of possession. And she didn’t care, because she was the same. She knew what her eyes said when she looked at him.

Mine.

---

She wasn't very fond nor connected with nature. But she felt like celebrating the official beginning of spring.

The weather in the city was still a bit cold, but the weather at the farm was already warmer. The threes were blooming, on their way to growing fruits during the summer. Baekhyun was shedding, and brushing his hair was one of her favorite parts of the weekend.

On Saturday, Kyung Soo had an emergency at work and left for the rest of the day. She was in charge of feeding the animal and making dinner. She fetched the veggies from his greenhouse all by herself, which later got her a congratulatory kiss from him.

They had dinner outside. It wasn’t warm, but nothing that a good poncho couldn’t fix. The sky was so clean that night, that they had to stay outside and enjoy the stars.

When they finished dinner, they sat outside, covered by a thick blanket and sharing a big cup of coffee “Love, I have an idea” He offered after sipping their coffee “Let’s go to the river for a night swim” She felt the excitement in her chest. Words weren’t needed, she stood up and Kyung Soo lead the way.

The flashlight they brought was unnecessary. The moon was bright enough to illuminate their path “Isn’t the water too cold to swim?”

“No, at night is always a bit…a tiny bit warmer, not super cold”

“Kyung Soo, just say is cold”

“It’s not! I swear is not as cold as during the day” She sank her hand on the water, and in fact, it wasn’t too cold, it was just cold. She turned around to mess with him but forgot her line of thought after catching him shirtless, pulling down his pants. The sight of his pretty butt covered in black boxer briefs was the only thing that mattered now. She felt like giving it a good bite. He folded his clothes and left them on top of a rock, away from the water “Are we skinny dipping?”

“That sounds fun, but I would rather not, I don’t want a river shrimp messing with my balls” She cackled, unable to continue taking off her shirt, so Kyung Soo helped her.

So, they got into the water on their underwear. And to her surprise, the water wasn’t very cold. Slightly lukewarm was probably the right way to describe it. And the outside was colder than the water, so it was a nice contrast. Still not better than a hot tub, which Kyung Soo still hadn’t bought “You will have your hot tub, I’m still thinking where can we install it so it looks good with the whole house, and we can also have privacy” He told her when she insisted “But babe, If you don’t want one don’t buy it, I just insist because I’m annoying like that”

“Nah, I want one too, Chanyeol’s mom got one and she always speaks wonders about it when I go visit her” She arranged her body against him, hugging his waist and resting her head on his shoulder “You go visit her often?”

“She is like a second mom”

“Invite her next week then, I will like to meet her” Some weeks ago she had met Kyung Soo’s friends. Finally, he decided to share his time with her, with his group of friends. It wasn’t something she would like to repeat too often though. It was a lot of work and energy. It was a group of four guys, but it felt like a village. They all had a lot of questions, a lot to share about Kyung Soo without his approval, a lot of stories. It was fun, messy, and heartwarming. Something that they could do once a month, not more than that. After all, their time was theirs and precious. She knew Kyung Soo was careful with how he shared his time. His work, his house, his farm, and his friends. At least that’s what she saw. She wondered if, in the past, a girlfriend was able to get into that schedule “Kyung Soo, You don't get lonely here?” She began building up her question “No, I spend a lot of time alone, which I like, but also I have my friends in town and I have you”

“What about before me, what about girls?” The building up kind of backfired on her, she wasn’t expecting the displeasure she felt the moment the word ‘girls’ left her mouth. She didn’t want to imagine girls, not in his present, not in his past “Girls?”

“Mmh, yes, girls, you didn't get lonely before?” She closed her eyes tightly, feeling stupid and hating where she was going with all this “No I didn't”

“That's good” Something in her voice made him search for her face, holding her chin softly “Is this jealousy?”

“No” She denied, poorly. He called her name followed by a chuckle, but she ignored him “Well, I must say, I like it, I like this jealousy quite a lot my love” She raised her right arm to slap his chest and make him stop, but he held her wrist and pulled her to his chest, capturing her between his strong arms. It was equally annoying and arousing “I knew who to call” He confessed, serious and honest “Good for you” He chuckled, caressing between her furrowed brows “But it's different with you”

“How?” She asked not sure of what kind of answer she was expecting “You don't shy away, you ask for more and I always want to give you more” He quickly clarified that he wasn’t comparing, but rather voicing out what he liked about her “I like some things, I enjoy doing some things and I know you can give them to me” She said through pouting lips. By now she kept acting like this because she knew Kyung Soo was enjoying it “I still don’t have enough of you, and I hope you are still excited about sharing time with me”

“I don’t think I’m ever going to feel less excited about sharing my time with you Hulder, ever”

“Are we talking sex-wise or love-wise?” She blurted out, not sure why she needed the clarification “Both” She sighed heavily, relieved and happy. Despite being surprised by her own questions, she knew that she could be this vulnerable with him. That he was going to answer, and maybe ask for clarifications later “I don’t want to make promises Kyung Soo, but you know that with me, you only need to ask and I will fulfill what you want” A smirk that she could only describe as dark arose in his lips “Are we talking sex-wise or love wise?” He threw it back at her “Both”

“Anything I want?” She nodded, her mouth replicating his smile. He called her with one finger. She moved her head closer to his, his warm lips brushing her ear. The noise of the river and the threes moving over them went mute and she could only hear his voice confessing what he wanted. She couldn’t believe how incredibly lucky she was, after hearing his whispered request. Later came the shock, after really processing what felt like a fantasy “You want me to peg you?” She asked in a soft whisper “I’m sure you are experienced” He commented offhandedly as he caressed her surprised face “How?”

“The way you touch me” He shrugged as his hand moved down her back, resting on her ass. Yes, she had played with his ass a couple of times, just because it was there and she knew it would feel great. She was surprised, and grateful when he accepted the touch “Are you sure?” She let herself show some of her excitement “I am” He answered amused “It could hurt”

“Not if you are careful”

“Have you done it before?”

“Not pegging, but I have done some things to myself” She closed her eyes, taking in his confession, imagining. And of course, getting aroused by it. The image of a Kyung Soo masturbating with some toy was something that never crossed her mind before, and now was everything she wanted to see. He looked gorgeous in her head.

He tapped her thigh and blew hair on her face “Stop imagining it”

“Can I see it?”

“No…well, we will see” That was enough for her “Can I see you?” He asked raising an eyebrow “Of course! I can do it now if you want, wanna watch me?” She started pulling down her underwear “Not now, just focus on the sky and the water” He stopped her hands and arranged her between his legs, hugging her against his chest.

---

She was out of the game one weekend because of her period. But at this point that was hardly something to lament. She still went to visit him, and still indulge with the pleasurable act of cuddle him and look at him. Caress his cute little head as he rested on her chest. Look into his magnificent wide eyes as he shared stories and sweet words with her. Kissing his button nose, caressing his soft cheeks, hear the prettiest laugh and his deep voice. At night she liked to play with his hair, rub his back and kiss the moles splattered over his body.

Those ways of intimacy, just whisper to each other at night, follow him around the kitchen just because she felt slightly cold and his back was always warm against her chest. Those moments made her see that all this was way deeper than any of them could imagine or recognize.

She knew his name and his smile will linger in her mind for a long time, even if everything ended at some point.

She used those previous days to prepare for Kyung Soo’s big night, as she liked to call it. He told her to order an extra bottle of lube because he was running out of it. Request that straight up turned her on. She had to do some shopping too. She had a harness that fit her perfectly and rubbed her in the right places, so she wasn’t planning on buying a new one. She did have to fish it from the bottom of her wardrobe since she hadn’t used it in years. But she did have to buy a new dildo. Hers was too big, and she didn’t feel like sharing it. So that night after work she went into her favorite sex shop website and bought what she needed. Next day delivery.

The moment she picked up her package she began feeling nervous. And that nervousness continued the following days. Kyung Soo noticed it over their video call and didn’t hesitate on making fun of her. But after he had his laugh, he made sure she was fine with all this “You want to talk about it?” He offered, sitting down at the table and resting the phone somewhere “Of course, I like talking about anything with you”

“What’s making you so nervous?” He asked calmly “Don’t laugh, but I started feeling a bit of pressure like you are losing your virginity and I have to make it unforgettable” He was quick to tell her how silly she was between giggles “Don’t laugh! I’m being serious, I’m preparing thoroughly” That caught his attention, his cute eyebrows showing his interest “What do you mean preparing? I’m the one that should prepare”

“Well sir, if you need to know, I just got in the mail the lube you asked for, and a new dildo”

“A new dildo?”

“Yeah, I could share mine, but it’s too big” He looked curious “How big?”

“As big as you, happy?” He chuckled again, shaking his head “I see, yeah, I think it could be too much for my first time…what else did you buy?” To his disappointment, there was nothing else to show. But the banter made her considerably less worried “I love that we can just talk about things like this”

“About you buying a dildo to fuck me this weekend?” He asked, looking serious but failing and breaking into a smile “Yeah, exactly that”

“Well, I love it too, I’m sorry it's making you anxious, but don’t overthink it and don’t worry, because I’m not, I can’t wait for this Friday” If Kyung Soo was there with her, she would be kissing him by now. They kept talking, with Kyung So throwing jokes at her nervous self until it was time to go to bed, and she excused herself saying she needed a shower “Take me with you then, leave the phone on the sink and keep the curtain open”

“Keep dreaming mister”

“I’m probably going to” She stuck her tongue at him and walked to the bathroom “Are you taking me with you?” He asked excitedly. She answered with an emphatic no “I know, I’m going to leave you then, have a good night of sleep and take care, I love you, beautiful”

“I love you too Kyung Soo, take care” She hung up after sending him a kiss and left her phone on top of the toilet.

She was exfoliating her elbows when it down on her. Kyung Soo said I love you and she said it back, as natural as when she cursed at her coworkers. Just coming from her heart.

She kept washing herself, not thinking too hard about it, only smiling the entire time.

She got ready for bed with the same smile, but this time wondering about things. Things related to Kyung Soo and their confession. She was sure she loved him. Whatever she was feeling could be easily described as love. He had become someone important to her. Probably one of the most important relationships in her life. And not only romantically speaking. She knew she loved him, maybe since a while ago. And now she knew he loved her, which was what was making her so happy. And she could only feel lucky by aiming her feelings and her dedication to him.

She was glad she said it back, like that, over the phone, after a fun, short talk. Easy going in comfortable, like everything between them.

Before falling asleep she stayed a long time staring at the ceiling. Covers up to her chin, feet moving under the covers, an incessant giggle rumbling in the back of her mouth. Pure bliss warming up her body as she thought about their first encounter and everything that followed. Spending almost a year with this beautiful man, which gave her butterflies in her chest and her pussy just by thinking about him. Who always gave it to her a little nasty and a little romantic.

----

She took the highway with a furrow on her face.

That Friday, work was horrible. She was tired, hungry, and slightly frustrated. It was 7 PM, the sun was still up and spring was already showing itself in each tree she passed by. Kyung Soo called her when she was halfway to his place. She put him on speaker and immediately relaxed a bit with his hello. She was sure Kyung Soo sensed something because instead of saying something about how excited he was, how he was waiting for her, he told her to drive carefully and that dinner was waiting for her.

After parking outside his house and pet Baekhyun, she went inside his house and greet him in the kitchen. He dried his hands and walked to her with a soft smile on his lips. He opened his arms wide and she felt something pulling her. With two quick steps, she reached for him and hugged him tightly, getting slightly emotional at the feeling of his arms enveloping her. She released a long sight and nestled her head on his shoulder, hiding on his neck “Long week?” He caressed her head and chuckled when she purred with his touch “Long and weird”

“Do you want to eat what I prepared for you and get drunk with wine?” She hugged him tighter, kissing his neck “That sounds amazing, but what about our night?”

“You mean you pegging me?”

“I have everything ready, but I’m so tired, and my head it’s just not here now” Kyung Soo grabbed her by the shoulders and made her look at him “Hulder, say what you need to say”

“You better offer it” He shook his head slowly, smiling warmly “You have to say it, you always have to tell me how you feel and what you need” She wanted to roll her eyes, but instead she hugged him tighter “Kyung Soo, can we leave the fun for tomorrow?”

“Of course we can, now go wash your hands, dinner is ready” She let go of him with a bit of resistance and kissed him on the cheek. Before going inside the bathroom, she called his name “Kyung Soo, what am I?” He put down the plates, chuckling. “You are such a good girl” She covered her mouth, shrieking, and went to wash her hands.

Kyung Soo prepared a delicious Cajun chicken with roasted potatoes and listened to her rant about work, the city, and the rude neighbor. They finished a bottle of wine over dinner and they opened another one to drink outside since the night was warm. In the beginning, they laid down in different deck chairs, but soon after Kyung Soo climbed on hers. Resting between her legs and laying his head on her chest. He dozed off a couple of times, but she didn’t. She was too focused on caressing his back and kissing his head “I like how warm you feel” He commented between yawns “Kyung Soo, when summer comes and it gets annoyingly hot, can I shave your head?” He knew how much she liked that look on him, so she was sure the proposal wasn’t strange for him “Sure... Are you planning on staying with me until summer?” His voice sounded playful, even confident. But the finger drawing circles in her waist betrayed him “I'm planning on staying with you until you get tired of me” He kept quiet. And he didn’t need to say anything. She could feel his response “Let’s go inside, it’s getting cold” He got up, rubbing his eyes, and helped her get up from the deck chair. She held his hand and didn’t let go as they got inside the house “Let’s go to the forest tomorrow” He offered as he locked the door, without letting go of her hand “Sure, I haven’t been there in months, but what if we met the real Hulder?” She covered her mouth in fake worry “If we encounter her, we share her” He giggled, like always, and walked her inside the house, turning off the light on his way “Ok, but you can’t fuck her, if you don’t satisfy her she could kill you” She teased “Why wouldn’t I satisfy her?!”

“I don’t know Kyung Soo, I’m not her, I don’t know what she likes” She let go of his hand as she got inside his room “I’m still not sure about that, I still have my suspicions about you being a Hulder”

“Well my love, I haven’t kill you yet, so If I am a Hulder, I’m satisfied” He gave her one of his goofy laughs, and held her face, kissing her cheek.

They chatted for a short while before going to sleep. As she cuddled in Kyung Soo’s chest, he kissed her ear and hugged her tighter “I love you” He whispered, “I love you too” The answer came as easily as before.

That Saturday was a slow one. They went out of bed late, she went to feed the chicken as Kyung Soo prepared brunch. Around five, they packed some water and food into a backpack and they went for their planned walk to the forest. Hansel and Gretel without the drama. This time Baekhyun went with them, but on a leash, his tail wagging in happiness.

The trees were bright green or deep dark. The smell of the leaves, the sun hitting the floor and the humble wildflowers hit her nose almost violently. Her senses were always invaded whenever she visited him. In the best way possible.

Kyung Soo held her hand, probably fearing another accident in the forest. In between comments about how beautiful that flower was, or gasps caused by wildlife passing by them, they held a light conversation. As always, the topics were diverse and flowed easily. Picking up where they left when necessary. When a bit of silence fell upon them, she asked what she had been wondering since the morning but needed some build-up to finally ask “Today we are doing it right?” She didn’t need to explain “Of course, did you change your mind?” He asked with his usual calm “No! Of course not, it's just I can't even imagine how to start” He stopped walking and turned around, grabbing her other hand and holding her stare “This is how we start, we take a bath, then you leave me there so I can prepare myself and you can go prepare too” She gasped “That sounds perfect, let's go then” She pulled him in the opposite direction, but he stopped her. He let go of her hand and passed an arm around her shoulders, pulling her in for a kiss. After kissing her long and hard, he let go of her “Now we can go”. He grabbed her right hand tightly and pulled her with him, almost making her trip.

They still had some things to do around the house. But they both worked quickly.

The gate and doors of his house were locked and every single animal fed “I’m going to get the tub ready” She told him as he connected his phone to the charger “Call me when is ready then".

She filled the tub with hot water, spread some bath salts with citric scents, and only called him in when she was naked and submerged in the water. Kyung Soo came in shirtless and gasped stunned “It smells so good, and you look amazing in there”

“Come and join me” She purred, opening her legs to give him space as he pulled down his pants. He looked at her amused when she told him to sit between her legs and rest his back on her chest. He liked the idea. When she hugged him closer to her breast he sighed happily, sinking deeper in the water. She cupped some water on her hand and spilled it on his shoulders, nape, and neck. She poured some soap on her hand and started lapping his body. His muscles relaxed under her hand. His skin kept getting warmer, and he kept sighing in contentment “Are you feeling ok?” She asked him, whispering in his ear. He chuckled and laid back, pushing her to rest her back against the bathtub “Now is perfect” She began washing up his chest, rubbing his skin softly, slowly. She enjoyed that part way too much.

Kyung Soo spoke softly, chatting about small, unimportant things. His way to relax her, she was sure. But he didn’t have to. Not that she wasn’t nervous anymore. She was just growing more and more aroused. The hot water, his body against hers, touching him everywhere she wanted. His hands were exploring her thighs or grabbing hers to drop a kiss or guide them wherever he wanted them. It was impossible to be nervous or worried when distracted by him like that.

But she noticed how he started to grow a bit impatient. He was moving slightly restless, his grip on her thighs slightly tighter “I think we got you clean babe” She whispered in his ear. He straightened up in one sudden movement, almost comically, and patted her leg, hurrying her up. She went out, splashing his head with soapy water, and grabbed one of the towels “I’m going to leave you so you can prepare then”

“I will be there as soon as I can”

“No, don’t, I mean, take tour time��� Kyung Soo gave her an exasperated look calling her name, elongating the last sound, provably seeing the worry in her face and voice “Don’t worry, go get dry” He splashed her some water and she finally walked out of the bathroom.

Trying to follow Kyung Soo’s advice to not to worry, she began preparing too. She brought the lube, harness, and dildo from her bag and toss them on the bed. Immediately, questions began flooding her head. Was it too soon to use a strap? Kyung Soo did tell her that he had used toys in the past. But what if the dildo was too big? What if he didn’t know how to prepare himself? Should she had brought poppers? Where poppers legal? What if she hurt him with her big dildo, not enough lube, and the lack of poppers? What if she traumatized him for not being able to fuck her boyfriend the right way?

She was pulled out of her panic when Kyung Soo grabbed her hips and pulled her to him. Capturing her by the waist and pressing his body to hers. He whispered her name on her ear and nuzzled her neck “What are you doing standing here?” She didn’t know what to answer. He moved his hands over her body “At least you are dry…is everything alright?” After a couple of seconds, she answered, or tried to “Is everything going to be alright?” She asked him trying to, as always, find some calm in him “Everything is going to be amazing, fucking amazing” He was able to pull a laugh out of her “Are those your implements?” He pointed at the bed where the three pieces rested “Yeah, lube, strap, and dildo, you like it?”

“It’s pretty, good size too, can’t wait to see you wearing it, why aren’t you wearing it?”

She turned around, hugging him by the shoulders pressing her chest against his. She always liked how his face changed whenever she did that “I was panicking a little bit, and forgot what I had to do” He kissed her nose and gave her a soft slap in her left thigh “Get on the bed and kneel over there” He ordered pointing at the edge of the bed. She took two steps back and climbed on the bed. She kneeled where he said and stretched her arms calling for him. He walked into her arms with a grin on his lips, holding her close, as he always did “Kiss me” He whispered, not that she needed the order, but she appreciated the low whisper. As soon as her lips grabbed onto his lower lip, something inside of her unleashed. Something between them began. Kyung Soo always deepened the kiss, sucking on her tongue and getting her first moan. She was so addicted to grabbing his hair as he sucked on her lips, stroking his shoulders as he rubbed her tongue with his. With one last lick to her lower lip, he moved along her jaw and down the slope of her neck. Their hasten breaths were synchronized, as their hands caressed each other’s skin. His lips were just a breath away from hers as he whispered beautiful things about her body, about his want. And she wanted, needed to give him everything he wanted. But his touch always overpowered hers. His hand moved with confidence and decision over her body. Knowing that he had complete freedom to do whatever he wanted. Confident that he knew just what she liked. She had that confidence too. But she was always so distracted by him.

He moved his hands down her waist, fondling her ass sweetly, making her giggle with the tickles. His hand kept moving down between her thighs until he reached her center moaning in triumph as he moved his fingers softly over her folds, spreading her wetness “You are already wet” He said, looking at her with wonder “I sure am…you get me like this so easily”

“Is it my touch or what is about to come?” He held her stare as he kept moving his fingers slow enough to drive her mad “It’s both, it’s everything, are you nervous?” She was acting a bit selfish worrying about her side of the story, of what she could do wrong, without checking on him first. Although he kept reassuring her how much he wanted this, she needed to check every step with him. His comfort, and his consent “A bit” He scrunched his nose, looking down “Relax” She whispered, caressing his ear “Touching you relaxes me” He rested his head on her hand “Then go ahead” A rumble of laughter in Kyung Soo’s throat made her sight, feeling completely taken by him “You are really looking forward to this” He joked “Really, really, really” She hid her face in his neck, already feeling a bit too much. Feeling like melting into his body. She grabbed his right hand, and he stopped moving immediately “Not yet?” He asked, voice soft and genuine. She only shook her head and with frenzy licked her way up to his neck, getting more moans and whispers in her ear. Although she wanted her pleasure, and she knew she was going to get it later, this was about Kyung Soo. And she wanted to make him lose his mind between her arms and legs.

She straightened her back, and whatever look she was giving him, he liked it. She could tell by the slight blushing and the cute smile on his lips. She reached for him with both hands, caressing his cheeks, feeling their warmth. She followed the path of his necks, shoulders, her fingers brushing his stiff nipples. With only her fingertips she caressed the soft lines of her stomach and kept moving down, inexorably towards his cock, but she passed it by and moved down his thighs, before going back upwards. This time she did what they both wanted and with one hand she began pumping his cock and held his waist with the other. She pushed down towards his pubic bone and then hard against the top of his dick. He was now fully erect, thrusting into her fingers.

Shame or even self-control were two concepts that weirdly applied to their relationship, so with that freedom falling upon them, she put her hands to work. One hand went to his balls, massaging and pulling, just hard enough, using the knowledge she has gathered over months of knowing him and touching him. Her other hand clasped around the base of his cock and squeezed. He choked out her name, and grabbed her face in his hands, bringing her lips to his, without kissing her. Just breathing and cursing on her mouth. She stayed like that, one hand around his balls, the other around his cock, swelling it. He got his pleasure, she got hers, and also an injection of confidence with every word of encouragement he roared in her lips. There was fire flowing through them, melting every cell of their bodies. She wanted him to go down on her, to ride his thigh, suck his dick. So many things. But above all that, she wanted to feel the strap around her hips. The power and unrestrained satisfaction that came from it.

Following a long, deep moan, he let go of her face and grabbed her wrists, stopping her hands from moving. He kept quiet, staring at her lips, frowning, a light sweat forming on his temples. Her body shivered with the tension he was forming. If he wanted her to beg she would do it happily “Kiss me, Kyung Soo, please” She felt his grip tightened, as he granted her wish, kissing her hard and fast. The kiss was short, as he began kissing across her chest, slowly, firmly. He traced along her collar bones, her nipples, lingering there, biting them, and pulling them. She was suddenly very aware of them as one of his hands let go of her and traced a line down her sternum, across her stomach, and in one swift move he cupped her pussy and inserted two fingers in. He did it in time to his lips pinching her nipples. She shouted in pleasure, throwing her head back, moving her hips as his fingers continued moving inside of her. His lips kissed their way to her ear and with a low whisper he asked her “Do you want me to make you come?” She shook her head, her mouth too busy moaning “You want to make me come?” She nodded, searching for his lips, but not succeeding. He was now away from her, his hand had moved from between her legs to her hips “Then put that on and do it” He pointed at the middle of the bed where the strap on was. She noticed how his fingers were still wet, so in an attempt to balance the power, she grabbed his hand at took it to her mouth, sucking him clean “Sit down and watch me get ready” He smiled as she gave his fingers a last suck. Kyung Soo sat at the edge of the bed and handed her the strap. She grabbed it and told him to pay attention “So next time you can put it on me, it’s not hard, but I’m particular about the tightness”

“I’m going to burn it in my memory”

“Very good” She slid the piece up her legs and arranged the straps over her hips and under her thighs. With clumsy fingers, due to the whole situation and a bit of rustiness from her side, she arranged the sliders, tightening them around her body. The dildo moved rather comically as she accommodated the strap, but it was part of the experience so she just giggled. Once she was done, Kyung Soo reached for her, so she took a step closer and let his hands wander over her strap “It doesn’t hurt, or scratch your skin?”

“No, this is good quality, no chafe, water-resistant, I can even wash it in the washing machine” He chuckled and with one finger followed the line of the purple dildo “Nice color” He commented, weighing it on the palm of his hand “You like it? Like how I look on it?” He stood up and pulled her to him by the straps of the harness “I like it, and you look beautiful, tell me what to do now” She took a deep breath, her heart racing “Get on the bed, to start, get on your hands and knees, I’m going to prepare you and then we can start, is that alright?” He took a deep breath, clearly feeling the same things she did, and nodded once “It’s alright, I’m a bit embarrassed, I’m not sure that’s the right word, maybe a bit self-conscious”

“I think that’s the right word, but don’t worry, you are going to start enjoying it soon” He nodded again and gave her a peck on the lips, turning around and climbing on the bed.

She had to slap herself to wake up from the daze of watching him just give himself to her, and to pump herself up. This was going to be unforgettable for both. And it was all in her hands. And she was going to do it perfectly. She was going to fuck the hell out of him.

She already knew how much experience he had. How much he could take, after speaking long and open about it over a couple of phone calls. She knew she didn’t need to explain too much to him either. But she knew she had to check on him in every step, after all, this wasn’t the same as using his fingers or a butt plug. Kyung Soo handed her the bottle of lube and arranged himself on the bed, as he told him, on his hands and knees.

She felt so lucky, so incredibly in love with him. Especially when he looked over his shoulder and asked her what she was waiting for “I’m sorry, I was just taking you in”

“Yeah? Looks good?”

“So incredibly good”

“I’m glad, so…I just have to stay here” She kneeled next to him and held his cheek, making him look at her “Stay here, relax, tell me if you feel any discomfort and if you like it…I want to hear that too” He nodded and patted her thigh, hurrying her. She went back to her previous position and squirted a good amount of lube in her fingers, spread it around her dildo, and then reached for his hole. At the first touch, he jolted, so she stopped immediately. He told her to go ahead, so she did. She moved the tip of her fingers in circles, covering the exterior with lube. Massaging to help him relax and stimulate him. With one long breath, he bent his elbows, resting his head on the bed, bringing his hips up. She smiled to herself and followed the need of her other hand. She grabbed his thigh, moving her hand up slowly until she reached his behind giving it a hard squeeze “Kyung Soo, babe, can I spank you later?” He released a breathy laugh “Sure you can, it’s only fair, I always spank you”

“Thank you” She whispered, vibrating with excitement. She kept moving her hand up, caressing the dimples on his back, staying there a bit longer as she kept massaging his entrance. Feeling it warmer, and definitely more relaxed. She looked at his body, feeling some appetite growing in her. A need to lick up his spine and taste the gold that came from the sun. She kissed his lower back and kept moving up. Kissing and licking each bump of his spine. Kyung Soo had his face hidden on his arms, she could hear low moans escaping his lips as he moved his hips, seeking more of her touch. Arching his back, begging her to enter. She positioned herself behind him and held to his hips, grinding the strap onto him slowly. He released a breathy laugh “What?” She asked surprised “I’m so turn on is stupid” He followed by a chuckle. She laughed with him, grinding again against him, turning his cute laugh into a moan “I need to prepare you some more though” She offered with a bit of worry “I’m fine, I already took care of it” She didn’t want to make him wait anymore, so she reapplied lubricant on him “Take a deep breath, relax and release as it goes in”

“Ok”

“And tell me if it hurts”

“I will” She kissed his right cheek and eased into him slowly. She saw in awe how he opened up for her. Slowly, with a slight resistance, but with a soft yet constant pressure, she was able to get half of the strap inside him. She listened closely to his sounds. Grunts mixed with soft moans, his shoulders looked tense, but the curve of his back told her that he wasn’t that bad. She had to ask anyway “Are you feeling alright?” She stopped moving before getting his answer “It feels weird, but no pain whatsoever”

“Want me to go on?”

“Yes please, I want it all in” She jolted as she felt his sentence hit her right on her clit. Excitement rumbled in her chest imagining how good it was going to get. Because it was never enough, she purred some more lube on her and kept pushing in, holding his hips with one hand and the base of the dildo with the other. Soon enough, she was all in.

Kyung Soo asked her to stay there, without moving so he could get used to the fullness. She caressed his thighs and back, looking at where they were connected with a big smile. She liked looking at his buff frame in the bed, under her. Because even if they were the same height, she always felt smaller in his arms. A sense of him covering her, embracing her. It wasn’t bad at all, but she always enjoyed being on the other side. Now she didn’t feel bigger, she wasn’t seeking that. But she felt him as something precious between her arms. Someone she needed to take care of, be very careful not to hurt him. Never to hurt him.

Kyung Soo’s shoulders were now fully relaxed and breathing more steadily. He reached behind with one hand and grabbed her hand that was resting in his left hip “I’m good now, move” She didn’t answer, only held onto his hand and began moving. Her hips backed up enough to leave only the tip of the strap in, and then with a slow motion, she went back in. He offered less resistance this time, but she was equally amazed and aroused by his body taking her in. He shivered, breathing faster. His hand let go of hers and went to his dick, pumping himself slowly. She moaned, lowering her chest, and hugging him from behind. Kyung Soo answered with a moan, lifting his head from the mattress and resting on his hands. She kissed his shoulders and neck, and he moaned, turning his face, searching for her lips. The cuteness and sexiness of it all made her buck her lips a bit harder, to which Kyung Soo answered with a louder moan. She was going to apologize for the sudden move, but he interrupted her “Like that, keep moving like that babe” She held his hips and straightened her back, arranging her angle. Now that she had his permission, she began experimenting with different speeds. Going in slowly, bucking her hips harder, in one swift move or faster, going in and out quickly. He was gasping with pleasure, getting out soft moans. Heat was unfurling in her core and she felt a quickening in her veins. She wasn’t going to come, neither Kyung Soo, but the sensation was close to that. The faster she moved her hips, the more she felt the strap rubbing her. There wasn’t a direct stimulation, but rather a constant pressure that kept her aroused. That and seeing her boyfriend enjoying this. Kyung Soo’s back was glistening, his muscles showing more due to the current workout.

She lowered her hips, trying a different angle, and started making small circles with them “Fuck, that feels amazing” He grunted, his mouth open and panting. She repeated the movement and grew a bit more confident, finally owning her role. She began pulling his ass into her as she pushed into him. Then slid out of him, and squeezed his ass, dropping the first slap. He jolted, releasing a gasp mixed with a moan “Do it again” She repeated her moves, getting another moan.

After a couple of times, Kyung Soo patted her thigh, calling for a time out “It's everything ok?”

“It is, it really is, I’m just a bit…overwhelmed” She used that time to reapply lube in their dildo, as Kyung Soo controlled his breathing. She massaged his thighs and butt cheeks, and despite how beautiful was her current view. She missed his face. She missed looking at him as they had sex, seeing his pleasure take over. His dark eyes and red, wet lips “Kyung Soo would you turn around so I can watch you” She asked softly, sweetly, knowing that it will take some convincing from her side. And his answer was what she expected “Is it really necessary?” Followed by a groan “Please, do it for me, I really want to see you, and also is going to feel great I promise”

“I know it will” He grunted again and slowly turned around, hissing as he sat on the bed “What? What is it? Does it hurt? Did I peg you wrong?” He started chuckling, covering his face with both hands “No you didn’t peg me wrong, I’m alright” He arranged his head on the pillows, dried his forehead with the back of his hand, and looked at her with hooded eyes “What?” She asked, fixing her hair, slightly self-conscious under his stare “You look gorgeous” He muttered, uncovering his face “I do?” Kyung Soo’s legs were slightly open, so she got in between them, hovering over him, one hand on each side of his head “You too, so beautiful” He gave her a beaming smile, turning his head to the side to drop a kiss on her wrist. The shine of his neck, covered in sweat, caught her attention. She lowered her body and dropped a kiss on his jaw. When Kyung Soo tried to turn around and kissed her, she grabbed his chin and held his head still, giving her better access to his neck “I’m all sweaty” He complained, but she ignored him, leaving a couple of love bites on her way. After showering his face with kisses, she pushed herself up, arranging herself between his legs. She took in his current estate. Messy hair, red lips, and shiny eyes, his neck now marked by her, sweaty chest, still breathing heavily. She could tell he was enjoying all this. Hopefully thanks to her. But what made her the proudest was the red, hot erection he was displaying “Look at you, so pretty” She simply observed, but still made Kyung Soo chuckle with a bit of embarrassment. She was hovering over him again, trying to go for another kiss, when her hair popped out the bobby pin she had put on. Locks of hair cascaded over her face, tickling his face, getting in the way. She lifted one hand from the mattress trying to fix it, but Kyung Soo bit her on it. He passed his fingers through her hair and then carefully placed it behind her ear. With soft fingers he caressed down the shell of her ear, rubbing her earlobe. She moaned with his touch, closing her eyes in pure pleasure “You liked that?” He asked amused “I like how soft you are”

“Soft?”

“Yes, soft, because even when you are rough with me, it’s rooted in your tenderness, the calm you share with me”

“So it’s a good thing” He wondered, fixing her hair on the other side “It’s a perfect thing” He grabbed her by the neck and pulled her down for a kiss. His tongue tracing over her lips, a possessive hand on her neck “You are not done with me right?” He whispered against her lips, low and fast. She answered with a smile, moving away from him, this time for good.

She arranged a pillow under his hips, caressing his thighs on her way. She repeated the process of lubing him up and her strap. There was always a hint of a smile whenever she looked at him, already relaxed and less worried about being exposed to her like this “Ready?” She asked him, kissing his right knee. He only nodded, taking a deep breath as she rubbed the tip of her dildo over his ass. She pushed inside slowly, noticing how easier it was to get in. Kyung Soo released a long moan, lifting his head from the bed, looking down at them.

This position was definitely better. Watching his expressions, seeing his chest move in compass with his heavy breathing. She moved her hips slowly, watching her strap going in and out of him, feeling extremely aroused by the scene. Doing this now, knowing that he was watching her, made her feel bolder. More sensual and definitely more resolved to give him the best night. Kyung Soo's hands wandered down his sides, locking his fingers with hers. He pulled her hands to his hips and held them to his hipbones “Go harder” He mumbled, moving his hands over his dick, grunting as she obeyed, pounding him harder. There was a short moment, just a couple of seconds where she felt like looking away. As if this was too intimate for her to watch. Too beautiful and bright. As if looking at the sun. But after those two seconds were gone, she reminded herself that this was for them to enjoy, for her to watch. Just for her. And she was going to make sure that she was the only one having him like this. The only one that he could come to when needing this kind of pleasure.

A pleasure that she knew she was going to need again someday. Because the power she felt, the constant rush of pleasure between her legs, the drops of sweat falling down her back, and their sounds were unique and addictive. It was driving her crazy, and she could tell Kyung Soo was on the edge too. She knew him good enough now, she knew every single one of his gestures. Kyung Soo bit down his lower lip, grabbing her hands and tightening his legs around her. She grinned in triumph before he said anything “I'm going to cum” He grunted, bucking his hips restlessly. Her dirty mind worked quickly. She stopped moving her hips and made him look at her “Where do you want to come?” He kept silent, his ears reddening adorably “Please say it” She pleaded, rubbing the back of his hands soothingly. He groaned, and then pulled himself up, letting go of her hands to grab her face. He pressed his forehead to hers, their mouth so close that when he finally answered her question, his lips were brushing hers “I want to come inside you”

“Fuck” She grunted against his lips, pulling out of him and getting on her back. Because she wanted the same. She began pulling the strap loose to take it off, but Kyung Soo stopped her “No, leave it there” She felt her eyes water. Too good to be true.

Kyung Soo helped her arrange herself on the bed and then tried to reach for a condom. But without second thoughts, she grabbed his wrist “Don’t… I want it all inside me” He whispered her name in shock and asked her twice if she was sure “I am, do you want it too?”

“Yes, fuck, I want it too” She pulled him closer with her legs, and bucked her hips against him, desperate. He licked his lips in the most menacing yet sensual way. With a half-smile, Kyung Soo grabbed her by the strap pulling her closer. He caressed her pussy, up and down, slowly, covering his fingers with her cum “You are so wet, so hot, I can see you enjoyed fucking me”

“Kyung Soo, you can’t even imagine how amazing it was” He chuckled, grabbing his cock, teasing her entrance “If it felt half as amazing as it is to fuck you, then it was worth it”

“Did you enjoy it?” He chuckled again and began pushing inside her “Why don’t you feel how much I enjoyed it” He tried to do it slowly, but she felt how he began losing control, shoving his dick inside her in one rough push. She moaned loudly, arching her back, grabbing her breasts to enhance every sensation. Kyung Soo cursed again, bucking his hips slowly, his eyes tightly closed as he buried himself deep inside her. She sighed, feeling some sort of relief, surprised by how nice it felt to be stretched by him, skin to skin. She opened her eyes, looking over at him. He had his eyes closed, his long lashes fluttering, his nostrils flaring as he grunted long and low. He called her name a couple of times, a sharp inhale brimming with longing. He began moving his hips slowly, their moans harmonizing. She watched him struggle to keep his eyes open when she couldn’t close hers. Not wanting to miss any of his reactions, keeping all this in her memory. But her memory wasn’t enough. She wanted the feeling of his skin burned in hers, and the taste of his mouth in her tongue. She reached for him, stretching her arms, but only brushing his shoulders with the tip of her fingers. She called his name, a whisper that was barely audible between his grunts and her moans. She tried calling him louder, and he finally opened his eyes, an urgent look in his eyes. She moved her fingers, stretching her arms farther away trying to reach for him. Something close to a growl sounded in Kyung Soo’s chest, and he did what she was begging for. He dropped on top of her, taking her breath away. Their mouths, all thrashing lips and probing tongues, ravenous animals. His fingers rivaled to reach her ribcage and grab and squeeze her waist. He let go of her after giving a long deep suck to her lower lip and kissed his way down to her chest. Kyung Soo groaned, squeezing her breasts together, and sucking a nipple between his lips “Don’t stop, please don’t stop” Her fingers weaved through his thick, dark hair, holding him prisoner against her chest. His rhythm remained slow. He panted and groaned on every stroke. Her release was pooling, so close, but not there yet. The edging was maddening and addictive. With one of his thrust, she felt him deep inside, and he stopped moving. He stopped kissing her and just rested his forehead on her chest, breathing heavily. She rubbed his neck and caressed his shoulder blades, moving her hips to the side, just a small movement to gain some friction “You are so deep inside me baby” She purred, with a clear agenda. Kyung Soo bucked his hips, moaning and getting what she wanted. He lifted his head, locking eyes with her, his cheeks red and his eyes shining “You are so fucking hot, I’m going insane” He ended with a short laugh, giving a hard thrust. He pushed himself up, making her miss his chest against hers, but sure that it was about the get better. He lifted one of her legs up to his shoulder, opening her up even further for him. He pulled himself out of her, looking between her legs with wonder as he rubbed himself. She was shaking, breathing fast, her hands sliding down her body, wanting to touch herself, but the strap was still on her way. She tried to lose it, move it to the side, something. But Kyung Soo grabbed the dildo, and pulled her hips to him, ramming his cock deep into her. She moaned loudly, and lifted her back, propping herself up on her elbows. Kyung Soo’s pace took off at speed, each thrust more powerful than the last. He let go of her strap and grabbed her head, pulling her closer as he laid down on her, stretching her leg and moving deliciously inside her “I’m going to come” He whispered, looking her in the eye “Yes! Don’t stop and come with me, give it to me Kyung Soo, fill me up baby” Kyung Soo cursed loudly, giving short and quick thrusts, moaning against her mouth. One last curse came before he pushed hard, spilling inside her. In an attempt to shut his moans down, he sucked on her neck, making her see white, finally reaching her orgasm. She held to his shoulders as she could, moving her hips with

no control, moaning on his ear, feeling him all over her walls. His open mouth was panting against her neck, whispering her name as she was still moaning, moving her hips seeking for more, just a bit more. With a loud grunt, Kyung Soo pulled out until only the tip of his cock stayed inside her and then plunged back inside. She moaned again, as he gave her a breathy laugh. She laughed with him, her gaze fixed on his face, his pupils blown wide enough that his eyes looked black. His body undulated, rocking in and out for the last time. She could already feel him going soft inside her. The muscles of his shoulders and chest began to relax beneath his skin until he finally stopped moving, drying his forehead with the back of his hand. She felt the aftershocks of her orgasm ease down her body, making her stretch her limbs. There was a short silence after both of their moans ceased down and their breathing reached a normal rhythm “Are we going to need another bath?” He asked to break the melted ice. But she ignored him at first, focused on the way he was losing the sliders of her strap. She let him finish what he was doing, a small smile on his gorgeous lips as he pulled the piece down her legs and then tossed it somewhere in the room “A bath sounds good, but later, come here first” She laid on the bed next to him, her head on the fluffy pillows and grabbed his arm, pulling him to her. He laid next to her, passing an arm under her waist and a leg over her hips. She cuddled him closer, hugging him and pulling his face to hers, catching his lower lip with her needy mouth. As always, he responded with the same neediness. Kissing slow, nasty slow. His hand moved over her back with more gentleness, his breath and moans a soft whisper. She rubbed his left thigh, trying to ease some of the soreness he must have felt, and then over his lovely ass. Carefully, in case he was feeling any discomfort “I’m ok” He commented between kisses, reading her mind “You sure? It doesn’t hurt?”

“No, there is a ….sensation, but I wouldn’t call it pain” She sighed with relief. Kyung Soo opened his eyes, now less dark, but clearly a bit tired. He looked at her, making her feel flustered under his stare “What?” She felt her cheeks growing red and she loved that feeling "Stay, stay with me the rest of the week." He sounded so serious, she could almost feel the possessiveness in his hands that held her ribs. This was the first time he had ever said anything like this to her before. Not even as a joke. It was usually her that decided on the time they spent together, how long she would stay at his place. It was almost an order, he was taking control of their time. "I think your orgasm is talking." She tried to ease the intensity in his eyes, in his words. "No it's not, stay for the week, stay for the rest of your life with me." She giggled seeing his grin get larger, his tone softening to a light tease. She grabbed his face, squeezing his cute round cheeks before kissing him tenderly. "Let's talk about it over breakfast ok?" She asked, trying to appease his sudden need for her to stay. She wasn't trying to give herself time to think about it, she knew what she wanted. She only needed the time to make a few calls, move things around to free up her week. But there was a conversation they needed to have, needed him to hear. Because being with him for a week, at their beloved farm, will only make her wish for more. For more than a week here with him. And if she were honest, if that couldn't happen she'd just kidnap him and disappear in the forest. Away from work, away from weekdays, away from only weekends.

After all, maybe she was the Hulder he claimed her to be.

The End

[badapricot]

Lovely Writer: Special 1

This is a rough translation of the first Lovely Writer special. There are 8 in total and other side stories that the author compiled. I’ll try to post 1 a week since they do vary in length, and some are a lot lengthier than this one.

This special is from Nubsib’s POV and it’s about Nubsib remembering his feelings for Gene after seeing him on Facebook, and becoming fixated. Nubsib is 15 at the time and Gene is 20.

At that time, I was in the ninth grade.

Since middle school, my parents had sent me to study abroad with my brother. Because of the wealth of my family, this was never an inconvenience. But living alone in a place that wasn’t your home country required a lot of adjustment, mainly doing everything on your own. You had to learn things that you’ve never seen and known. 

This was one of the methods of teaching the sons of the Thanakitpaisan family.

It was their luck to have a son who was mature since childhood. It didn't take long for me to get used to the culture there, where I went to parties, attended sports clubs, worked a part-time job, and even had typical American teen sex. Being Asian did give me some advantages, when it came to distinguishing myself from the others.

I could only smile when talking to the many blonde women who bragged about our experiences in bed, amongst their group of friends. After some time, I felt differently about it.

"Sib.”

"Yes?" I leaned back on the sofa, and raised my head from his screen when I heard my name.

Neung came downstairs. He was wearing a thick gray cardigan with a scarf. "I’m going to go meet a friend. You're not going anywhere today, right? "

"Hmm."

"Okay, I might be coming back late. Please get my package when it arrives. You’re not going out with your girlfriend, right?”

"We broke up.”

"Huh?” Neung frowned. "You dumped another one? Again? You know, you don’t have the face of a womanizer.”

"…"

Neung opened the door of the house. For a moment, the cool outside air blew in, until the hot air from the heater disappeared. I didn’t care much about either, and stayed looking at my phone screen.

I’m not a womanizer.

It’s just that every time I got together with a girlfriend, something felt wrong. I knew I wasn’t in love with the first girl. The others, I didn’t like particularly much. Sometimes the girls didn’t like me much either, and only wanted a partner themselves, so we’d eventually separate.

It was true, that I was only in the ninth grade. But sex here was too normalized. It had become so normal that I’d become bored. When sex became so commonplace, all excitement was lost.

Mom: (send picture)

Mom: I’ve sent you Thai ingredients that should be delivered soon. They’ll be waiting for you.

Mom: Today, I went to see Aunt Run, do you still remember the house next door? Today is the Aunt's birthday. All of her sons have come home.

Mom: I saw it and I missed you and Neung.

I looked at the message that popped up, from the other side of the world. It was dark here, but over there it was probably in the middle of the day. It was time for them to eat.

Mom: Do you remember Gene? Gene and Jap are all grown up.

Gene?

After reading my mother’s message, it was natural to think of the past. I missed it. During my childhood I would run and play with him everyday, and just the same, Gene would play with me almost every day.

I still remembered “P’Gene” clearly after all these years.

We were five years apart. But we somehow became closer than me and my own brother. Since I moved out of the house, we never saw each other again. We didn’t have any more contact with each other.

When my mother talked about that time, I felt nostalgic.

I moved my finger to type to ask for a picture from my mother. In the end, I sent a simple sticker. I sat on the sofa in the living room for awhile before retiring to my bedroom to shower.

In my warm bedroom,  so different from the night air outside, I picked up my phone again. I went to Facebook to catch up with everything back home. My finger kept scrolling through my news feed, my face blank. I started to feel sleepy, but before I could fall asleep I saw a status.

I wasn’t friends with the person who posted. But I was friends with his mother, who was tagged in the photo.

Jap Jarernpipat posted a picture.

This year, my mother has lost another year, haha.

In the picture was a group of six people. The background was a wide garden and a long table. Both of my parents, and Auntie Run and Uncle Teep were there. But the one that most caught the eye was the man in the lower right corner.

The other person grinned until his eyes were crescents. His hands were raised, flashing a peace sign. His hand held a cake tray with a delicious golden egg. The corner of the mouth was stained with white cream, like he was teasing someone. He was smiling, which made his cheeks round and full.

I couldn't take my eyes off of him. For a second, there was a strange numbness in my fingertips and toes.

I didn’t need anyone to tell me who that was.

P’Gene.

He was still wearing a white uniform shirt. It had been many years since we’d met, if counted by age. Gene would have been in university for three years.

Usually, I was the kind of person who didn’t care about the people around me, or anyone else. But this time, I couldn't control my fingertips. I clicked onto Jap’s Facebook page.

Chasing him down, I found a status posted with the person I was looking for tagged.

Jap Jarernpipat posted a picture

My brother brought me to the movies. What kind of crazy alien movie is this? I might puke, but maybe you guys on Facebook will like it.

The post was from three days ago. One was a picture of a cinema ticket on the top floor of a department store in the heart of Bangkok and the other was of P’Gene in a T-shirt and jeans. He hugged a bucket of popcorn. His hand was holding a large glass of water, lifting it up to his lips and sucking. It was a funny candid photo that many of his friends on Facebook commented on to make fun of him.

...but for me, the only word that came to mind was “lovely”.

I didn’t know why I was doing this but I pressed “save that image”.

Jap Jarernpipat posted a picture

My stupid little brother, you make the whole house look bad.

They were in a garden in the corner of the house that felt familiar to me, but was a little fuzzy. They were in front of a flower bush that had been trimmed into a square. Gene was sitting down, with his butt on the ground. A blue hose fell next to him, the hose spraying in another direction. It made him wet all over soaking his shirt, the thin material clinging to his body.

Both of his arms were behind him, to support his body. Therefore, his shirt and body were stretched, so I could see two small nubs contrasted and poking through his white shirt.

My eyebrows furrowed together, and I frowned.

I cursed when my body immediately had a strong reaction, just from the one picture.

I pressed the comment section, when I saw the high number of comments.

Jiranon Jarernpipat: Jap stop posting pictures of other people.

(Reply) Jap Jarernpipat attached video clip.

I clicked play immediately.

"Ow, P’Jap!”

“Hahaha, why would you say you’ll help me water the plants? You can help if the grass is dead.”

“Can you turn off the water for me first? Why are you recording?”

P’Gene raised his white hand. He wiped the water from his face, and pushed himself off  the ground. His shirt clung to his body, so I could see everything. He had the voice of a man, but he was still so cute.

Finally, the clip ended.

There were still a lot of other videos that Jap posted pranking Gene, all of which stopped me from becoming bored. I saved all of them to my phone and computer. In the end, when more and more accumulated, I created a whole separate folder.

That night when I fell asleep, my brain was filled with pictures of the boy next door, who I hadn’t seen in years.

Another morning, days later, I woke up frowning, and I had to gently breathe out. I’d dreamt of P’Gene again. Since seeing that picture that night, there hadn’t been a day where I could go without seeing his face.

I knew Gene’s Facebook. But he didn’t update much, except to change his avatar or cover photo. But Jap’s Facebook page had tons of pictures of Gene. So I was still able to look at Gene’s pictures and progress in life everyday, like some kind of psychopath.

Even when I closed my eyes to sleep sometimes, I still saw his pictures.

I didn’t want to be this way, but I couldn’t control my subconscious.

I always saw Gene lying in my wide bed. He would smile at me, his cheeks soft and reddish. His hands would hold on to me, and his mouth would gently say, “Sib.”

It was a fantasy that any teenage boy would have. But it wasn’t a woman. Instead, it was the boy next door, who always loved and saw me as a brother.

I circled back to look at his pictures every day. In the end, the feeling accumulated like a huge mountain of snow.

I want to meet him in real life.

I want to hug him.

I want to smell him. 

I want to kiss his mouth. I want to do to him what I do in my dreams.

Since the day I saw his picture and until today, my thoughts and feelings had become more and more intense. So intense, that sometimes I was afraid of myself.

I’d already decided how I’d deal with this.

“Will you finish school here?” Neung had packed all his bags and was ready to go because he finished his studies. I leaned against the door frame, looking into his room.

“Actually, it’s nice here too, you know.”

"No, I'm going home."

“So you’ve changed your mind then?”

I nodded.

“Well, our house is nice and of course, our parents miss you too.”

"…"

"I'm not going to be here anymore, don't bring any women into the house...but you're not dating any girls lately. So it's fine."

I sent off my brother, who took a taxi straight to the airport to go back home to Thailand. Personally, I still had a year to complete my studies.

In the past, I had never thought or worried about how fast or slow time would pass. But now, I felt jealous of my brother.

Back at the house, I picked up the phone. I was still for a while. Maybe it was because Neung had returned to Thailand, but I felt like chasing pictures wasn’t enough anymore. My fingers moved before I could decide to send a message to someone.

Nubsib tanagijpaisarn: P'Jap.

Nubsib tanagijpaisarn: Do you remember me?

I wanted to talk to someone who could tell me everything about P’Gene. 

I wanted to learn everything about him.

[agentnico]

The Suicide Squad (2021) Review

This may be the better of the two, but the first Suicide Squad film will always hold the crown for managing to win an Oscar... somehow.

Plot: The government sends the most dangerous supervillains in the world -- Bloodsport, Peacemaker, King Shark, Harley Quinn and others -- to the remote, enemy-infused island of Corto Maltese. Armed with high-tech weapons, they trek through the dangerous jungle on a search-and-destroy mission, with only Col. Rick Flag on the ground to make them behave.

“So that’s it, huh? We’re some kind of suicide squad?” says Will Smith in the original first film, with the line in itself being a poor attempt at a fourth wall break, yet, that movie never reached that promise of being a true Suicide Squad film. Because hardly anyone died, and as a whole David Ayer’s film was a generic mess, regardless of studio interference or not. In comes James Gunn from Marvel, who seems to have cracked the code for how to bring this comic book series to live action in proper gratuitous form, with even the ‘The’ in the title symbolizing that this is the one!

I remember going to see the first Guardians of the Galaxy film at the cinema, and back then I was still only just getting acquainted with watching western media, and that included superhero films. Heck my first ever Marvel movie was Thor: The Dark World! I know, what a banger to start with.......NAAAWT!! Anyway, I went to see Guardians and it was one of the first superhero films I came out of feeling like I truly witnessed something special. It had action, comedy and a good heart to it, and wouldn’t you know, my good old pal James Gunn was behind that flick. I don’t know why I called him my good old pal, I don’t even know the fella. Except in my dreams, but we don’t talk about that. So, flashforward to Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2, which I absolutely hated, and for that movie I’m pretty sure Marvel gave Mr Gunn mostly full reigns of creative freedom, as long as he kept it family friendly, and the result was a mess. Hence naturally now I was really sceptical when James Gunn ended up at Warner Bros. following the controversial moment when cancel culture decided to aim it’s slimy fingers at him, as he was given directing and writing duties for this new The Suicide Squad film, and also it was heavily insinuated that Warner Bros. basically told him he could do with the movie whatever the f*** he wanted, excuse my French. And we remember how it panned out last time when James Gunn was given a lot of creative freedom. 

Flashforward to present day; here I am wondering and scratching my head thinking what in the heavens has happened, as by golly I am happy to report that The Suicide Squad is a total winner and a blast with a capital B - Blast! Gosh goodness golly goblin, this movie is so much fun from beginning to end. Right from the opening sequence you know that this film isn’t holding back any punches. It’s going at a 447.19 km/h speed of a Koenigsegg Agera RS crashing through any barriers like it’s nothing. Speaking of the opening sequence, it establishes why the movie is called what it’s called from the get-go. You straight away are proven how not a single character is safe, minus the obvious one that we know who it is, as there ain’t no way Warner Bros. would have allowed James Gunn to kill off that one character. But besides that person, everyone else feels like they could die at any given moment. That’s really a big charm of it, as it is frustrating how in many superhero films, let alone any blockbuster action flicks, so many characters always feel so safe and unstoppable, no matter how many times they get shot or how many buildings crash down upon them. And yes, this movie features a certain CGI character that constantly gets that treatment and survives, although it’s very self aware in that regard and is purposefully humoristic. But overall the entire set of characters feel easily disposable, and so so many of them die in such gruesome fashion, so indeed don’t get attached, as they don’t. 

Speaking of which, this movie is hardcore gory! You see limbs and intestines flying round left and right, a guy gets ripped in half by a humanoid shark, another’s face gets teared off by a shotgun bullet and so on forth in all kinds of gruesome fashion. Visually this is one for the big screen, as here’s the thing: you’re either a mummy’s boy or you grow some cojones and go see a man’s heart get stabbed with a piece of debris glass in 4K high rate definition! Your choice! Oh, and it’s not just the violence, also the cinematography and the practical set pieces all look incredible. This is easily James Gunn’s best looking movie. The entire think LOOKS incredible!

We also have to talk about the cast, as they are all great! There literally isn’t a single weakling among them. Each one, no matter how big or small their role is, brings something to the table. I can’t talk about all of them, as we’d be here all day, so I’m simply going to mention a few of the stand-outs. Idris Elba comes in to replace Will Smith as a character called Bloodsport, who is in some ways a different character but evidently is a replacement of Smith’s. But that’s no bad thing, as with any ensemble movie you still need a main character to latch onto and have an emotional hook towards, and he is that character. In fact, I’d say he’s arguably better than Will Smith in the last movie, or at least he seems to be having more fun here. He works as a solid leading man, however what works even more is his banterous competitive genital-size-measuring back and forth with John Cena’s Peacemaker, who by the way is awesome as that character. He is not a good character, in fact he is as bad as a bad guy can get, especially cause he’s someone who believes that what he is doing is right, making him much more of a dangerous wild card. This is easily John Cena’s best role, with him adding to the comedy one-liners, but also delivering such an interesting character who I’m looking forward to seeing more of in his standalone spin-off show confirmed for next year. Oh, and he wears a toilet helmet on his head which he defines as “a beacon of freedom” which says it all. We also have returning characters from the last film Joel Kinnaman and Viola Davis as Rick Flag and Amanda Waller respectively, and both are given much more room to stretch their talents and spread their beautiful acting wings like the Hollywood angels that they are. Kinnaman’s Rick Flag is the moral compass of the group, as even though Elba is our main guy, he’s nonetheless a villain still, whilst Flag is a genuinely good guy and what is defined as a true American hero, to which Kinnaman fits the part well. And Viola Davis as Amanda Waller is on an absolutely different level. You can tell she’s an Academy Award winner through and through, as she plays such a serious character in an otherwise goofy movie, and so her presence is felt and it is felt BAD! She’s such a despicable yet intimidating personality and she gravitates all of the screen presence to herself. Margot Robbie returns as Harley Quinn, and she gets even more chance to develop this character that she’s played in multiple DCEU films now, and as per usual the Harley Quinn shtick works well for her, though I do kind of wish she didn’t always get all the attention. Look, I think she’s a fun character and Robbie plays her well, however she’s constantly used to overshadow others in these films which I don’t think is too fair, and its evident as ever in this film too. Anyway, the remainder of the cast including Jay Courtney as Captain Boomerang, David Dastmalchian as Polka-Dot Man, Michael Rooker as Savant, Nathan Fillion as TDK, Daniela Melchior as Ratcatcher 2 (who gave me strong A Plague Tale: Innocence vibes) and many more all play villains, but villains that don’t have particularly great superpowers. This is where the tragedy of Task Force X as a team plays a part, as many of these villains aren’t even good at being villains. They are useless, and the movie is really self aware of this and so treats all characters as they should be. Dare I also not forget to mention the CGI characters in this film, with both Weasel and King Shark being absolute scene stealers! 

The Suicide Squad is the type of wham-bam-thank-you-mam batshit crazy entertainment which exists for the pure reasons of fun. It doesn’t set out to be the best superhero film ever, nor does it need to be. It’s an exhilarating, shocking, funny and amusing ride from beginning to end, with the energy never stopping, and is easily the best time I’ve had with a comic-book film in a long while, and I’m even talking about before COVID! Do yourself a favour and watch this one as soon as you can, as I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again - The Suicide Squad is a BLAST!!

Overall score: 9/10

[let-me-luve-you]

Hidden Relationship

Tom x Twin!Sister

Summary: Tom isn’t happy that his twin sister kept a huge secret from him, but everyone else knew. 

Warnings: angst, asshole Tom but he gets better, ends in fluff though. 

MASTERLIST

Family dinners were a necessary thing when everyone was in town. Every night. Whether that be Nikki or Sam cooking or going out to a restaurant. Family dinners started when your twin started his acting career. He was usually only home for two months of the year and it wasn’t consecutive.

Tom arrived this morning and at your parents house was the first time you had seen him in a couple of months. You spent the day out with your boyfriend of one month. You needed to tell Tom about it, but you just couldn’t get up the nerve. He’s going to be mad and he is going to give you the silent treatment for life.

Sam and Nikki set the table. You sat next to Tom and started joking around with him. As Dom sat at the head of the table, he laughed at the older twins antics.

“Did Harrison not want to come, Y/N?” Nikki asked you. Everyone knew but Tom and Harry since they’ve been in America. You didn’t think anything of it as you shook your head.

“He was meeting Charlotte for dinner and a movie.” You said.

“Why would Harrison come?” Tom asked Nikki. He turned towards you, “And how do you know what he’s doing? I don’t even know what he’s doing.” You stared at your brother in shock at his angry tone.

“We’re friends?” You said in more of a question.

Nikki looked at you with soft eyes. You could see her apologizing to you without saying the words. “Y/N, maybe it’s time…”

“Time? Time for what?” Tom asked looking back from your mum to you. You sighed.

“Harrison and I…” You said before looking down at your plate. “We are dating. Have been for a month.”

Tom dropped his fork loudly. He stood up from his chair abruptly and started pacing behind you. “YOU WHAT?” He practically yelled. “You’re dating Harrison. A guy you despised growing up. Would never hangout with us?”

“Yeah. Whenever he moved in with you, we grew closer.” You said turning to look at him. He refused to meet your eyes. “I started staying at your place when you were gone. Seeing how I liked living from mum and dad.” You stood up and stopped in front of him. “Harrison wanted to tell you, but I was afraid of how you would react.”

“My best mate and my twin sister are together?” He asked more to himself. “Out of all the guys you could have dated, why him? Harrison is my best mate. If something happens between the two of you, it will make it awkward? Did you even consider how I would feel about this? How I’ll be dragged into the middle or even worse, I’ll have to choose.”

“You won’t have to.” You told him with a begging look in your eyes. “Don’t let this come between us.” You started to cry. Tom refusing to look at you broke your heart. Of course you’ve had fights, but they weren’t ever this bad.

“You let it come between us when you didn’t tell me.” Tom said before he walked past you. You followed him to the front door and were going to follow him out, but before you could, he slammed it in your face. The sob you had been holding in finally released as you fell to the ground. Harry walked up towards you and helped you stand up before he pulled you close.

“It’s okay, Y/N/N. Just let him walk it off. He just needs to let the news set in. Once it does, he will be so glad that a great man is taking care of you. He’ll know that Harrison will never do anything to hurt you.” Harry said. You shook your head before walking upstairs to your room.

After sitting in your room for an hour or so, you finally calmed down enough to leave your room. When you walked downstairs, you heard your family talking about you. You slowed and sat on the bottom step.

“Tom’s at home. He said he texted Haz to not come home tonight. When I went over there, he was still extremely angry. I’ve never seen him like that.” Harry said. You started tearing up knowing that you were the cause of your brother’s emotional outbreak.

“He’ll get over it soon enough. I’ve never seen Y/N happier.” Dom said. “She probably should have told him sooner, but I definitely get why she didn’t.”

“She told me she didn’t want to affect the relationship between Harrison and Tom.” Nikki added. “She’s thought a lot about this. It nearly broke my heart when she said if Harrison and her ever got really serious and then broke up, that she would tell Tom to side with Harrison.”

“Why would she say that?” Sam asked.

“Because she knows how much Harrison means to Tom. He’s been there through it all. Friends like that don’t come everyday.” Paddy said. You heard your mum hum in agreement.

You continue to sit there for another twenty minutes listening to your family talk about you and Tom before they moved onto Harry’s recent trip with Tom. You were just about to get up when you heard the front door open. You looked up to see Tom walk in and make eye contact with you.

“I’m leaving. Don’t worry. Go finish your dinner.” You said standing up before heading back upstairs. You heard Tom sigh before you heard his footsteps following you. You walked into your room and he slid in and shut the door behind him.

“I’m sorry for the way I reacted. I should have sat down and talked with you civilly.” He said sitting next to you on your bed. “Don’t get me wrong. I’m still angry, but I want to talk to you about it.”

“Okay.” You said softly. If he wasn’t sitting so close, he wasn’t sure he would have heard it.

“Tell me about it. Make me understand.” He said.

“We started hanging out more. Watching movies before bed, going to get dinner when I got off work, or we would just sit and talk. I started to get feelings for him. I wanted to call you so many times, but I didn’t want to bother you. It was nice to hangout with someone that knew about your life. It’s so hard to find someone that is interested in me for me. People I meet now, I always think, ‘are they only talking to me because of who my brothers are?’ ‘Is he only interested because he wants to know the guy that plays Spider-Man?’”

Tom sighed. Your life got harder when he got his start. He knew that. His brothers had their own fans because of him. You had some people that loved you, but for the most part, he knew about you being used to get to him. He hated the pain it brought you.

“We had gone out to see Onward. I wanted to see it again, but didn’t want to go alone. So Haz took me to the cinema that brings food to you. We ate, we laughed, and we cried. It was a good night. He was such a gentleman. He held my hand as we walked to the car. He held it all the way home.” You blushed. Tom gave a small laugh at your reaction. “He walked me to your room.”

“Ah please don’t tell me you had sex in my bed.” He said in a whiny tone. You laughed.

“No. No we didn’t. I would never do that.” You said laughing. “No, he walked me to your room. We stood there awkwardly in the hallway. He finally kissed me.” You blushed and Tom made a gagging sound. “He then said goodnight and went to his room. The next day, he was gone before I even got up. He had a shoot. When I got home from work he had cooked dinner and set up a candle light dinner. That night he asked me to be his girlfriend.”

“I understand not telling me at first, but why didn’t you ever tell me? I had to find out by accident.” Tom asked. You could tell he was hurt by your actions. “Who all knew? Did you only keep it from me? Your own twin?”

“Everyone but you and Harry knew.” You said looking away from him.

“And Haz wanted to tell me?”

“Yeah. About a week after we started dating, we were cuddling up and watching a movie and you called. Do you remember that?” You asked him.

“Yeah.” He nodded his head.

“Harry had asked why we were hanging out. He joked saying we finally got together.” You turned to see him looking at you. “You had the most disgusted look on your face. Said we would never date. That it would be too awkward and that we would never last.”

Tom looked down and remembered the words. “Haz wanted to tell you that night. He’s been begging me to tell you. I just couldn’t. I knew you would be mad so I was afraid.”

“I’m sorry I made you feel that way.” Tom said, grabbing your hand. “It will take some getting used to, but I’m glad you’re happy. I’ll talk with Haz later. I’m just glad you found someone who will take care of you. I know it’s been rough with being able to trust people. I’m happy you found someone that isn’t using you to get to me or our brothers.”

Tom pulled you close to him and he kissed your temple. You leaned into his embrace.

“I promise to never keep something like this from you again.” You said.

“I appreciate that. Love you Y/N/N.” He squeezed you tighter.

“Love you too T.” You squeezed him even tighter.

[migilini]

What The Heart Wants - Charlie Gillespie

Request: The reader is madly in love with Charlie who is her best friend but he’s dating and in love with her sister yk? Make it angst and sadcharlie

a/n: Sorry it took me so long! I’m so stressed with school atm so i bearly had time to write at all. I still hope you like it and that I went into the right direction. Don’t know how angsty it is.

Words: 2.3k

Warnings: a little angst

MASTERLIST

-------------

As a teenager you spent a lot of your free time watching pretty much every rom-com that was out there, the thought of true love ignited a spark of hope in your heart. You loved the way that the characters on screen always were meant to be together, the way their love just seemed to be or else life isn't worth living.

Maybe your image of love was flawed and unrealistic. Maybe you always fell in love with the idea of a person rather than the person itself. Maybe your standards were too high and maybe that's why all your previous relationships didn't seem to work out.

And then you met him. Kinda ironic really, love, at first sight, was always your least favourite trope. But there he was, sitting alone at the table in the otherwise crowded cafeteria. His brown hair fell into his eyes while he played with the mashed potatoes on his plate, he was bopping his head to something. You took a big breath, collected all your courage that you didn't use growing up and sat down across from him.

The stranger looked up with furrowed eyebrows "S-sorry there isn't another free table." you stuttered and sent him a small, flustered smile. The boy took out an earbud "Sorry?" you started to blush, your eyes wide "Oh I- sorry I- was uhm... is it okay if I sit here?"

"Yeah yeah sure." the stranger answered and shot you a smile and gosh was that smile beautiful. If this was your way to die then so be it. "I'm Asher by the way."

"Y/N. Nice to meet you." you waved with three fingers.

After that Asher took you under his wings, introduced you to all his friends, took you to parties and most importantly helped to grow your self-confidence. You always knew who you were but with him, it was the first time where you could actually show off the real you, there wasn't a part of you that you had to hide to fit in.

Nevertheless, he wasn't your best friend. You two spent a lot of time together yes, but you didn't share a lot of secrets, your topics always being superficial. Yet, the crush on him only grew. The two of you were picture book perfect. Asher threw you into the water at the beach, screamed to lyrics in the car with you or even went shopping with you.

"Just this one party I promise," he whined one day, shoving more dresses in your chest. You huffed "Is this why you agreed to come thrifting with me? To get on my good side?" Asher smiled cheekily "Guilty. I know you don't know the people there but I really want you to go." he tried to persuade.

You looked up at him through your eyelashes, trying to hide the smirk on your lips. You liked to see him throw a little tantrum. "Fine. But you'll pay for my dress."

The host of the party seemed nice enough and you hoped to god that the guests were the same. LED Lights illuminated the living room in a dark purple. The music blaring so loud, that you could feel the beat in your heart. "Y/N this is my good buddy Charlie. Charlie this is Y/N one of the baddest people I know." Asher screamed over the music, one of his arms draped over your figure. The party just getting started as more people walked through the front door.

You gave Charlie a hug and smiled up at him. "Hi!"

"Hello." he smiled back and your breath got stuck in your throat for a good second. Suddenly Asher had competition for the prettiest smile in the world. The boy with the mischievous spark in his eye really challenged your rankings.

You didn't intend to spend the night practically glued to Charlies hip. Asher was nowhere to be found, probably smoking somewhere with his buddies and the two of you were just naturally drawn to each other. He goes to get a new drink and a minute later, without discussing it beforehand, you do the exact same thing. Or you go on the small balcony to get some fresh air and Charlie joins you a couple of minutes later, casually leaning against the railing next to you.

"I figured that I would find you out here." he nearly whispered into the night. "Yeah it seems like you've been stalking me the whole night." you teased with raised eyebrows, a slight smirk playing on your lips. Charlie's hand immediately covered his heart. "I would never! And there I was, thinking I had the honour of you stalking me."

"Alright, Teds. If it makes you happy yes of course I was chasing after your pretty ass." you winked and he let out a heartful laugh.

"Teds?" he asked.

You shrugged your shoulders and slid down the railing, your front, facing the glass doors. The party inside was raging, with people dancing, kissing, talking and laughing. Only the faint noise of the newest pop song carried its way out to you.

"You're wearing a shirt with many teddy bears on it. It only made sense."

You and Charlie spent the rest of the night outside, the conversation flowing naturally and if there was a quick silence it wasn't awkward at all. Lucky for you, the party was in the middle of the summer so you didn't mind that much that you forgot to bring a jacket outside.

After the party you and Charlie spent a lot of time together, going to museums, road trips, camping or even just hanging out in one of your apartments. Inert weeks he was your best friend and over the years of friendship, you started to develop feelings for the Canadian.

He had helped you calm down right before your first date with Asher, who finally had the guts to ask you out and picked up the pieces after you got broken up with. Asher's last words before he left, never leaving your mind: "Truthfully I think you're in love with someone else Y/N. You just haven't figured it out yet but I know. I look at you the way you look at them."

Several months later, on a trip with your family and Charlie, you realised that Asher was indeed telling you the truth and you had been slowly falling for someone else.

It was late evening, the stars started to creep up on the sky, while the sun sank lower and lower behind the trees, illuminating the world in a pretty blend of oranges and pinks. The group sat around a small fire that cracked every now and then, filling the air with warmth. Everybody was exhausted from the big hike. Trees rustled somewhere in the background. A soft melody caught you off guard, completely ripping you out of your own thoughts.

Charlie sat a couple of feet away from you, across from your sister and mother. He was playing his guitar with no special song in mind. He settled on a melody that you didn't seem to recognize but you didn't care. Charlie looked beautiful.

Over the last year, he grew out his hair, which was now in a loose bun in the crook of his neck, some stray hairs falling in his face. The warm light from the fire highlighted his features in the exact right way. His eyes sparkled with joy. Before he started to sing the song, he looked over at you and smiled. It was the same smile that haunted you since then. The one that made your heart beat faster, the one that still took your breath away, the thing you couldn't shake off and also the one thing you couldn't live without.

While you stared at Charlie during the duration of the song, your heart swelling at the sight of him. He did the same to your sister. His eyes memorising every crook of her face from her arched eyebrows down to the roundness of her lips.

It didn't surprise you at all. Growing up everybody either wanted to be her or be with her. She was naturally gorgeous with long, luscious hair and an amazing body. She had decent grades and was always nice to everybody. The embodiment of the girl next door. It was hard to build a reputation that wasn't ‘Sam’s little sister’.

Looking back, that was probably why you liked Asher's attention so much. It was the first time someone saw you for yourself.

But what did shock you was that eventually, the two became a couple. Looks-wise they fit perfectly together that much was true but you couldn't wrap your head around them when it came to personality. From your romcoms, you knew that opposites attract yet Sam and Charlie are more than opposites. Not to say that you didn't love your sister, you really did, that was the main reason why the news shocked you so much. He liked to travel the world, not to be tied to one place for a long time. He was spontaneous and carefree, always down for a new adventure or a new adrenaline kick. Sam on the other hand wanted to take over dad's business in her hometown where she already went to school and college. Ever since she was little, she dreamed of a big family that was gonna grow up in the house she grew up in. Sam didn't like leaving her little bubble, her days always planned down to the second.

Neither of them noticed your heart breaking a little more every time they kissed right in front of you or the longing looks you gave Charlie. Both tried to include you in their adventures, taking you to the cinema with them, to IKEA and Disneyland. Still, you couldn't shake the feeling that they weren't quite meant for each other. However, you kept your mouth shut just, always smiling their way, not mentioning that Charlie never went on Road Trips anymore or that Sam seemed to smile less.

“I think I want to marry her.”

You nearly spat out your drink, the fist in front of your mouth only holding back a little. The water dripped down your arm and onto the couch.

“What now?” you coughed and turned to the other person chilling at your apartment.

“You heard me right. My acting career is taking off and all the travelling made me realise that she is the one.” he smiled with a lopsided grin.

You furrowed your eyebrows, desperately trying to hide the hurt that flashed in your eyes. After trying, again and again, to get over Charlie you lost all hope. No other man even slightly compared to him, you tried to forget about him you really did. However, your heart believes that he was the man for you.

“Don’t the two of you want completely different things?” you switched into the best-friend mode, locking the jealous side away.

Now it was Charlie's turn to be confused, “What do you mean? We’ve been together for nearly two years now.”

“I just mean that she never expressed the desire to travel the world. She wants to have a big family and be a mom. Is she gonna travel to your jobs with you? Are you giving up your career to be at home with her? I just think there are so many things the two of you need to discuss before you take this step.” you expressed your concern while playing with the hem of the blanket covering you.

He stared at you for moments. Neither of you was speaking, the gears in his brain working in overload.

“Look I’m not saying that you shouldn't ask her to marry you. If that's what makes you happy, be happy. It's what I care about. I’m just saying you have a completely different view of the world.” you rambled, your eyes not meeting his anymore.

Was he mad? He normally spoke his thoughts out loud.

He lets out a sigh as he rubbed his hands over his face “Yes I know that you're right...but my gut is telling me that she's the one...” your heart cracked “and I couldn't forgive myself if I didn't ask, even if it ends up not working and you were right with your concerns. But knowing us, we will make it work. Compromise a lot, build a worldview together as a married couple.”

He smiled at you and your heartbeat quickened “I also kinda need your blessing.” he sheepishly said, slightly biting his lip.

You tried to keep your thoughts clear. “My blessing?”

Charlie nodded excitedly “Yes! I figured since you’re my best friend and she's also your sister I would ask you if you would be okay with that… I know we never asked if you're comfortable with us dating in the first place.”

“Oh, Teds," you whined, using the old nickname you had for him. "No need to ask me! As I said your happiness is my priority.” you smiled so wide that it hurt your cheeks, blinking rapidly to dissolve the tears that formed in your eyes.

He tackled you in a bone-crushing hug, placing wet and sloppy kisses all over your forehead. “Thank you. thank you. thank you! You don't know how much this means to me!”

Growing up, watching the Notebook, About Time, 10 things to hate about you, PS: I love you and many others, love always seemed inevitable, somehow it would work out. You would've never thought that you would be jealous of your sister's engagement. Who would have predicted that both sisters were gonna fall for the same guy, that one sister was happy while the other hated herself for yearning for him as well?

The 25-year-old version of you despised the 15-year-old version for loving these goddamn rooms, for believing in a soulmate, one true love, love for everyone but mostly for believing in an own happy ending.

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Taglist: @alluringworld