#only adding that because you aren't gonna leave me alone once this start so better have a tag!

[boxing-confessions]

Hey, Boxten... (@thatsleepycandy1)

(Oh 'goodie' it's Astros marshmallow twin/marshmallow guy. My turn ig.)

"Oh, uh, hey Marshi." Boxten said, stimming. He was sitting down in his hamster ball "Before you ask, please don't open it up."

[applepi-1]

They comfort you after a break up

Sugawara x you

Kenma x you

Suna x you

(Picking names was hard, I used a random picker wheel and apparently, my computer loves Tsukishima, Akaashi, and Bokuto a lot.)

Also Kenma's is longer... :)

--

Suga- 820 words

You were at his house in front of his door, sighing lightly before knocking. You could hear his footsteps, you felt stupid and guilty for waking him up at 11. He looked at you softly, only to turn into worry as he noticed your clothes were a bit messy, your cheeks were puffy, and your hair looks like a rat's nest. "Uh, Y/n?"

"Can I stay here tonight...?" Suga opened his door letting you walk in, immediately closing it behind you, grabbing your arms so he could look at you better.

"What's going on?" He quickly stepped to you, "Oh no no no, N/n, don't cry, it'll be okay, I'm here now." He sat you on the couch before sitting next to you, taking you into his arms. He cradled you, as you wrapped your arms around his waist, hugging him as you cried into his chest. He silently held me for a moment before he spoke again. "Y/n, do you want to talk about it? Tell me what happened."

You pulled yourself out of his chest enough to look him in the eyes, "B/n broke it off." Ugh. You don't need him to see you like this. You know that he wouldn't react very well to the breakup. When you had first said yes to B/n when he'd asked you out, Suga had gone to him and told him to take good care of you, and to talk things out if they got rough. Well, B/n left you crying and Suga is not happy to see you like this. You're sure he's thinking about stabbing him multiple times.

His expression went from concerned to shocked to angry to comforting in less than two seconds. "Oh Y/n," he hugged you, holding you tighter. "Did he say why?"

"He just wasn't feeling it anymore, his feelings had gone flat and run out." You cried into his chest, your salty tears staining his Polo shirt. "He wasn't interested in me anymore."

He rubbed your back, comforting you, "Y/n, it's going to be okay, I've got you. I won't let anyone hurt you anymore." He pulled you into his lap as he leaned against the back of the couch. "I know that it hurts, but I promise you I will never let anyone hurt you like this ever again." He kissed the top of your head and you cried harder.

"Sh...Sh...n/n... We should watch a movie." He whispered once you calmed down.

He reached across the couch and grabbing the remote. He typed in a movie title quickly so that you couldn't see. Then it was loading in front of you.

You admired how he was so focused on making you happy. You liked that he paid attention.

But of course, you paid attention to him too. You noticed how his hair is a mess, and how he was wearing a t-shirt, he knew he could always be comfortable around you. You loved the way he carried himself confidently when he walked. You loved when he called you, 'Love', it made you feel a different kind of special than other names. You picked him as your best friend for a reason.

However that may be, you also couldn't help but admire that when he reached for the remote, his arm was very close to you and his lean muscle was hard not to attend brain cells too. He held you tight and you could feel his strong chest, and his toned abdomen embracing you. When you looked into his eyes, you could feel yourself falling in love with their shade and color. When he spoke, his deep voice entranced your thoughts. You couldn't deny that he was attractive.

"Love," he said. "Are you watching the movie?" he asked, running his fingers through your hair, twisting the ends between his first finger and thumb.

You looked up at him, "Sugawara,"

"Yes?" he asked.

"I just wanted to say your name," you said. "I like to say your name."

"I like saying your name too." he smiled.

You looked into his eyes, and he looked right back at yours, he very slowly, leaned in slightly, his eyes starting to close. He lightly pressed his lips to yours, in a very tender kiss. He pulled away, slightly. A blush rising on your cheeks. Your heart fluttered. He smiled and you did too.

You rested your head on his chest once again and thought about what just happened. He kissed you. On the lips. With his lips. They were soft, and they pressed on yours ever so lightly and you wanted that amazing feeling again. The soft gentleness of his love pressed to your skin, your lips. You loved him, he was your best friend.

You looked up at him again, making him look at you. "Suga, what just happened?" You asked.

"I kissed you," he said. Then he thought for a moment, "Yeah, I kissed you."

--

Kenma- 1705 words

"Kenma?" You asked on your phone, your voice wavering. You could just feel the lump/frog in your throat creeping up because, first of all, even though Kenma was your friend, you always got a little bit nervous when you talked to him, once you had developed a crush on him. And second of all, you were on the verge of tears.

"Hey, Y/n. Are you alright? Do you need me to come by your house? Is there anything wrong? Or am I just overreacting?" he said. You could tell that he was obviously worried, just by hearing his tone and his many questions.

"I'm fine. But can you please come over? I need a friend." You stated simply, not revealing too much.

"I'll leave my place in a minute and I'll be over there as soon as possible. Okay?" You nodded in response, forgetting that he couldn't see me at the moment.

"Thank you." Your voice was barely above a whisper now. Kenma wouldn't get off the phone because he kept wanting to make sure that you were alright. "Dude I'm okay. I'm just not sure that you'll be if you keep this call on while running. I need you, though, so please just hang up and come as soon as you can." You had to be the one to hang up, even though it pained you to do so. At the moment, though, it had seemed like it pained him more.

~ Time Skip ~

There was a knock on your door and you knew who it must have been.

You knew that it was too early for your family to be back. You were home alone while everyone else was out at dinner. Somehow, you had convinced your parents to let you stay home, alone. They said that as long as you didn't party and no one, that you didn't trust, came into the house, they'd be fine with it and they'd probably let you do it again.

You got off of your bed, which you had ended up crying in, and started walking down the stairs.

Sweeping your hair out of your face and trying to smooth it out, you went over to the door. You took a deep breath, pulled down both of your sleeves, and put on the best fake smile that you could muster.

As soon as you saw him, you couldn't take your eyes off of him. You didn't even offer to let him in at first. All you did was take in his handsomeness. blond hair with black roots and his golden eyes; wearing his usual, laid-back outfit that you always enjoyed. It was weird to you how one person could help alter your mood, by even just the tiniest bit.

"Aren't you gonna let me in?" he asked, smiling at you, with a slight blush creeping onto his cheeks. He looked down at his phone hoping you didn't see it.

"Oh, sorry!" You apologized, gesturing for him to come into the house and shut the door behind him.

"Hey, I hate to do this to you, but do you mind if I take a look at what's in the kitchen?" he asked. "I had practice and I changed, walked over to my house and that's when you called. Now I'm starving."

"Sure!" You replied with fake cheeriness, going toward the living room. He walked into the kitchen, which had a pretty nice view of the room you were going in. "And I'm sorry. I should have let you stay over at your house." You faked a laugh, which screamed the word 'fake', and that gave your whole charade away. He walked into the living room, where you were about to sit down on the couch. Taking a seat next to you, he turned toward you.

"Y/n, what's with all of the apologizing?" Before you could respond, he added, "If you really wanna apologize, don't feel bad about things like those. Apologize for lying to me."

You knew that he wasn't going to let you lie to him anymore, who were you kidding to be lying to him, so you quit your act and put down your guard. You looked into his eyes and he could see that you were on the verge of breaking so he put his arms up as you crashed into him and wrapped your arms around him, starting to let out your sobs. You cried into his t-shirt and, strangely, he didn't actually seem to mind. He wrapped his arms around you and brought you in even closer to him.

When he started to rub circles with his hands on your back, you started to relax. Nobody had ever made you feel that comfortable before when you were as distraught as you are at the time.

You started to control your breathing and he just kept you enveloped in his arms. He put his chin on top of your head and mumbled, more to himself than to you, "It's okay pudding."

Once you had stabilized your tears and breathing, you looked up and took a quick glance into his eyes. You looked away quickly, though. You were fearing that he was going to judge you or use this moment against you. It's not like he was that type of person, because he really wasn't, but nobody had actually seen you so vulnerable before and you weren't sure how he, nor anyone for that matter, would respond.

"It's okay," he promised. "You can tell me anything and I swear I won't tell anyone unless I think it could help. And I'd tell you first. You do not have to feel embarrassed around me."

You looked back into his eyes and saw how sincere he was being. Just by looking into his eyes, you could see loyalty, sincerity, honesty, and care. You were super grateful to have him as a friend. He's not used to this, Kenma's not used to comforting anyone, or good with his words, so it shocked you a little.

"I, uh, you really wanna know?" You asked. When he nodded, You decided that it was now or never. "B/n broke up with me..." You whispered making Kenma sad. "And you want to know the reason why?" You asked dramatically, but before he could ask you gave him an answer, "It's because I've been dealing with depression and anxiety for a long time now. You know that. And it's been so hard and nobody understands. Every time people find out, they judge me. Or they just tell me to get help. But whenever I try to get help, nobody cares. Even if they do care, they don't understand, though. I hate sounding selfish and bitchy, but I just wish that there was someone who cared and understood, y'know? It's hard enough going through your teenage years, trying to figure out who you are, but then having depression and anxiety on top of it really sucks. And it's a really crappy thing to go through." He just sat there, stunned, so you continued. "I mean, having to deal with me has, probably, always been tough, but it's probably gonna be harder now. Plus, it's like what if I end up using this as my excuse for all my irrational decisions? I would be abusing this disorder, almost as much as it's abusing me. And it's just really hard to deal with. Because even the people who care a lot, and who try to understand what I'm going through, can never really help. I'm not sure if they just don't get it or if they just, honestly, don't actually give a crap. As much as I want them to understand, though, I really couldn't wish any of this upon them because nobody, even the worst of the worst, deserves to go through depression and anxiety. And I just don't really know what to do with all of these pent-up emotions."

By this point, you had let out all of your emotions and tears; that was enough explaining, at least for the time being.

"Y/n, don't ever feel like you have to keep secrets like those from me, okay? I care about you, more than you could ever imagine, and I want you to know that and to be able to open up to me."

"I know you care, Ken." You mumbled, leaning away from him.

You just sat there, gazing into each other's eyes, and he let out a sigh. "Of course I care. You're my best friend, and you have been for a while now. Hell, you're more than that! All I want is for you to feel comfortable around me. I mean, I don't really understand what you're going through and I also don't understand why you're going through it, but I do know that you're such an amazing, gorgeous girl that doesn't deserve any of this bull. I can't even begin to pretend to understand any of this so I'm not going to. I'll try to understand, sure; but I'm not going to act like I do because that'd be a lie. But I really like you and I don't wanna see anyone go through this pain, especially not you."

You had no idea how to respond to that so you just sat there, staring up into his eyes. How do you respond to that...? Kenma- a boy who never said much since you've been friends- just full-on rambled to you. "But what about all my flaws? Do you really want to have to deal with this?"

"You have a hell of a lot more to deal with than I do so I'm not gonna be the one to complain. And I don't care about your flaws. I mean, I do care about them, but I don't hate them. Your flaws are what make you the person you are and the person you are is imperfectly perfect and perfectly imperfect. As cheesy as that sounds, it's true. Because I have the power to see beyond your flaws and to see who you truly are, and I am going to use that power like I already have. Your flaws just make you even better, in my opinion."

Again, you were speechless.

--

Suna- 662 words

You ran to the gym quickly once you ran all eyes were on you. But all you could do was run to your best friend. Miya Osamu was confused as you immediately wrapped your arms around him. "Y/n?" He didn't have the time to look at you, they were practicing against Karasuno, and any other time you would've cared, Suna walked in with the other Miya twin looking at you in shock, but Suna ran over to you before Atsumu could open his mouth.

"Y/n?" He pulled you away and took in your appearance, you were supposed to be on a date with that guy, B/n. But now looking at you, your shirt was a mess and unbuttoned a little, your cheeks were red and puffy, your lip was busted a little, and your hair... god you were a wreck, he immediately wrapped his arms around you letting you cry into him. "Atsumu, get my jacket." The boy did as told handing it to him, before he wrapped it around you, letting you put the jacket on as he zipped it before pulling you back into his chest. "What happened, N/n?" You held onto him tighter, he sighed and looked at the other members. "Would you tell me if we were alone?" You sighed leaning up to whisper it into his ear.

"It... it was a bet..." He furred his brows at the answer, everyone looked confused as well.

"What do you mean...?" You sighed again tugging his shirt, he got the message and bent down a little.

"It was... a-all a b-bet... to g-get into m-my pa-pants..." You admitted embarrassingly. Suna's eyes widen looking down at you before his blood boiled.

"It was what?!" His voice was low and cold, it literally made you shiver. He didn't want you to repeat yourself, eventually, Sugawara came over rubbing your arm softly.

"What happened, dear?" Sugawara always gave off this mom vibe making you smile a little, but that mom vibe was immediately replaced with scary after you told him the story.

"Where're my knives Daichi?!" Daichi jumped looking at his boyfriend {;) I'm kidding, maybe..}

"Uh... it's that bad?" He looked at you making you nod, saying it was okay to tell him.

"Oh, it's that bad. It was all a bet." Everyone looked at you in shock. Tsukishima even gave you a small smile. You just nuzzled your way into Suna trying to make yourself disappear.

"I'm sorry... S-Suna..." he looked down at you before gently rubbing your arms kissing your head lightly.

"I knew you still had a thing for him, you lying bitch!" You immediately tensed up, Suna looked at the boy over his shoulder. He stopped short in his track as he noticed all the death glares he was receiving.

"What did you just call our manager?" The twins said together looking at the boy with murderous glares.

"Daichi, I need my knives!" That was what made him run, but all the boys followed, all except you two.

"You okay...?" You looked up at him and shook your head.

"Not really..."

"Hm, want to come over and watch a movie...?" He was ignoring what your ex said, making you sigh.

"You don't have to beat around the bush, I get it, you don't like me... so..."

"I-I didn't think much of what he said." You don't really ever see a blushing Suna, so it was a first. "I-I thought he was lying... but, w-who said I didn't like you back?" Your eyes widen a little as he looked away.

"Do you... like me back...?" All the boys stopped at the door hearing your conversation and like Suna would do if this was one of the twins, they filmed it.

"I... I do..." You felt a smile appear on your messed-up face. Suna looked down at you and smiled back. "I-I'll kiss you when your lip isn't busted." You both laughed before hugging your best friend, well now boyfriend.

[ordinaryschmuck]

What I Thought About "Knock Knock Knockin' on Hooty's Door" from The Owl House

Wow. They are really pushing it for that secret message, huh?

Anywho--Salutations, random people on the internet who certainly won’t read this! I am an Ordinary Schmuck. I write stories and reviews and draw comics and cartoons!

I think it goes without saying at this point that Season Two of The Owl House is setting itself up as a season without filler. Now, filler episodes aren't always bad. Yes, it hurts when a series turns away from the main plot for a week. But at best, they're utilized as a chance for the writers to play around with the characters and developing said characters without it relating to the overarching story. So, some people who see that consider it a bad thing that a series doesn't have that many filler episodes.

I like to call those people: F**king morons.

Don't get me wrong, I see where some of you are coming from. And I'd be willing to agree...if The Owl House was a plot-driven series. Which it's not. It is a character-driven series. Because for every plot thread and narrative that the show presents, they always relate to the characters and develop them further each time these threads get brought up. For example, look at "Knock Knock Knockin’ on Hooty's Door" (It pains me just to write that). Several narratives move forward, and it’s all done to make the characters grow. And to explain how requires going into spoilers. So keep that in mind as you continue reading.

Now, let's review, shall we?

WHAT I LIKED

Hooty: Might as well start with the character that this episode is about.

To tell you the truth, I wasn't a huge fan when I found out we're getting a Hooty-centered episode. I've grown to love him over time, but he is a comedic character that's best used in small doses. Primarily due to how his voice is grating to me (My ears are still bleeding...). With that said, I do really love his contributions in "Knock Knock Knockin' on Hooty's Door" (Seriously, there couldn't have been a less awkward title?). Hooty's antics when trying to help everyone are as hilarious as they are heartwarming. He deeply cares for his friends but just doesn't understand how his plans could do some unintended harm, which is pretty lovable if you ask me. We also get some surprisingly great insight into his character, as he feels insecure about basically being the comic relief who doesn't really do that much other than being funny. Rarely do you get that level of dimension from a comedic character, and it's even more uncommon for that to work out as well as it does here. It once again proves just how competent the writing is in this series to the point where we get an episode about Hooty, and it's funny and heartwarming instead of being annoying. And whoever is responsible for that, you're the best.

Lilith’s Letter to Hooty: I mean it when I say that I love how Lilith kept her word about her and Hooty becoming penpals. Their friendship was something I would have never expected to love, and I'm still shocked that it works so well, so seeing it continue like this just warms me to the bone. Plus, it is pretty sweet that Lilith's kind words are what inspired Hooty to do what he's done in this episode...meaning it's Lilith we should thank here--SON OF A WITCH! Even when she's gone, she's still working her way into my heart!

King going through Puberty: What?! KING IS EVOLVING!

(There, I made a Pokemon reference. Do I get my cookie now?)

Eda Keeping Herself Awake to Train Herself: I'm willing to bet a large sum of money that this has everything to with Raine getting captured last week. If Eda was still the most powerful witch in the Isles, she might have actually saved them. But she isn't, and now the love of her life is in the clutches of a tyrant planning something that could potentially be the end of everything. So I can understand Eda pushing herself to her limit to get back on top again, as I would probably do the same. It's not healthy in any way, and Eda would be doing more harm than good. But when it comes to the people you love, logic doesn't always win out in the end.

Luz Wanting to Make her Way into Amity’s Heart by Making the Echo Mouse Happy: ...That's it. I Just...I just love everything about it, ok?

This was also when I knew that I was wrong to doubt that there would be zero Lumity in this episode. I realize my follies now, and I humbly apologize.

Hooty Teaching King About Demons: This was so funny. So, so funny. Probably doesn't come as a surprise, especially since The Owl House proves itself as a comedy before, but the jokes have never hit as frequently and as hard as they did here. From Hooty getting offended by King's dance to him and Dana's insert wanting a "DNA sample," everything managed to successfully make me lose my s**t. It does come at the expense of King suffering, but I can stomach that much more than if it were Eda or Luz. And, as a bonus, we get lore about how demons work, added with another great joke of King getting in trouble with Hooty for saying he already knows this stuff. Humor isn't always the show's strong suit, but when it works, it f**king works.

King Wanting to Know What he Is: But despite how funny King's vignette was, we still get to see more of his character grow. We learn that he's frustrated now that there's this big question mark over his life now, feeling extra angry that his father "abandoned" him to leave such a present mystery. It shows the hidden resentment he has that Lilith inadvertently brought out, made even worse when King's father hasn't responded to the video yet. King hasn't really gotten that much development until "Echoes of the Past," so it's pretty cool that the writers haven't really slowed down on it. Especially when it leads to these great moments of King venting his frustrations.

King’s Shouting Powers: KING learned FUS RO DAH!

(And now that's a Pokemon reference AND a Skyrim reference. WHERE'S MY GOSH DANG COOKIE!?)

Eda’s Nightmare: If King's vignette hits you hard with the laughs, Eda's will absolutely hit you harder with the feels (never make me say "feels" unironically again). Knowing that Eda's life got thoroughly screwed over by the curse is something we could figure out on her own. But seeing just how much the curse ruined her life and tore apart relationships that mean the world to her really does a swell job at ripping apart the soul. What's even more tragic is, technically speaking, it's all sort of Eda's fault too. She kept hiding the curse, refusing to be a burden to others who would do all they could to help. If she had only been open and honest, things probably wouldn't have changed much, but they most likely would have been better than they are now.

Eda Attacked her Father as the Owl Beast: ...I don't know what I was expecting when "Keeping Up A-Fear-Ances" hinted that there was some possible tension between Eda and her father...but it definitely wasn't this.

The fact that we see blood where his eye used to be doesn't make things any happier, either.

Raine Broke Up with Eda: Before we get into anything else, let's celebrate the fact that it's now confirmed that Eda and Raine really did use to date in the past. Because this show is just f**king phenomenal with its LGBTQA+ representation!

But, seriously, this is a fantastic reveal that goes far beyond just shipping...well, sort of. It shines a new light on Eda and Raine's interactions from last week, revealing that while they're not a couple anymore, they still very much love each other. It helps make their last interaction especially tragic, as they were both on the same page now and could very well be together again. Only for them to be forced apart for the second time in a way that's much worse than the first. And I frickin' adore that this series changes the impact of one episode one week later. Again, it shows just how competent these writers are, and kudos to them for making something so...perfect.

The Moon Person: WHO THE FU--Nope. Nope! We have more than enough mystery bulls**t to deal with through CreepyLuz and Philip Wittebane, so I am PUTTING YOU ON THE BACKBURNER FOR NOW!

(They're probably nothing more than a one-off character, anyway)

The Owl Beast and Eda are Connected: Through visuals alone, we, the audience, can clue into what the curse really means. The Owl Beast doesn't want to be a part of Eda as much as she doesn't want it to be a part of her. Whether they like it or not, and they very much don't, they're stuck together. The thing is, and this is what I love the most, they still decide to make the best of their situation rather than let it ruin their lives even more. This might be the best possible turn Eda's curse could have made. It'll still affect her, and there are probably more negatives than positives, but at least now, it's not the worst thing in the world. And I feel like that's all anyone can ask when in a position like her own.

Eda's “Pretty Dream”: I don't know what emotions are toiling inside me more with this moment. Awe and wonder over how beautiful Eda's dream is, or heartbreak over the implication that she has only had nightmares since getting cursed...I'm gonna say both. Yeah, it's definitely both.

Eda’s Harpie Form: Well, fan artists are gonna have a field day with this...especially the freaks.

(You know who you are. And you're weird!)

Luz Calling Amity a “Cotton-Candy Haired Goddess”: ...Have I ever mentioned how much I love this show?

Hooty Kidnapped Amity: ...Hooty, if your stupidity wasn't charming, I would be more than willing to call the authorities over how you kidnapped a girl in your version of a knapsack and locked her in the basement. For that is going to ring SO MANY alarm bells in people's heads.

Amity and Luz Stuck in a Tunnel of Love: *Smacks lips* Mmm. The adorable awkwardness of this moment is just *chef's kiss* magnifique!

Luz being afraid of getting made fun of:

Amity’s look of hope: I mean...just...f**king--LOOK AT HER:

That is the look of a girl who, while embarrassed as hell, still is ecstatic to learn for a brief moment, everything that she is hoping for has a high chance of being real. Who, in their right mind, wouldn't go "Aw!" at something so pure and innocent?!

Luz Destroying the Tunnel of Love: This is how to effectively utilize dramatic irony. The audience can understand why Luz is tearing the place apart because she explicitly states that she's afraid of Amity rejecting her in the end. They also know that's bogus, thus making it extra painful to watch Amity's heart break more and more with each second (which is perfectly represented through Amity's expressions). You feel bad for both of them, and even worse when you know that it can easily be prevented by the simple art of communication. That's what makes it great dramatic irony. Knowing the point of view of each character results in a scene that evokes emotions in two different ways.

Hooty’s Breakdown: This was...genuinely hard to watch. Not that it was badly written, far from it. It just...hurt seeing how destroyed Hooty was when he realized he failed the people he has such an admiration for. On the upside, a wholesome moment follows soon after as the Owl House gang tries to reassure Hooty that he's done a lot of good that night. It's a pure action that shows even though Hooty gets on their nerves all the time, they still care about him...damn it. I think I'm gonna cry.

Eda’s Advice for Luz: ...Eda...You're the best.

You found out that your surrogate daughter wants to ask a girl out, and not only were you quick to deliver the best possible advice ("Just go for it!"), but you also quickly reassure her that it doesn't need to be perfect.

And you know what? That's it. Eda is the best cartoon mom! She might not technically be Luz's mom, but I don't give a s**t because she is the best!

Luz and Amity Ask Each Other Out: Shh-sh-sh-sh...

Do you hear that?

...

...

...It's the sound of dozens of Lumity fans collectively losing their s**t...and I'm one of them.

WAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!

HOO-HOO-HOO-HOO!

IT!

IS!

CANON!

AH-HAHAHAHAHA!

HOLY S**T! Holy s**t! Holy s**t...might just be the best way I could possibly describe this! Finally, after all the waiting, speculating, and praying, THESE TWO IDIOTS FINALLY GOT TOGETHER! AND IT WAS PERFECT! I mean, it was awkward as s**t, but that's what makes it perfect! You know why? You wanna--Hey! *snaps fingers*. You want to know why? It's because they're teenagers. Of f**king course, it's going to be awkward! This is their first relationship, so there will be a lot of missteps along the way. And that, in itself, brings me to the best (second best part?) thing about it happening in episode eight of the new seasons. Most endgame couples get together in the climax or even at the end of the series. But to have them get together this early on, means there will be quite a few episodes dedicated to showing them grow as a couple.

And better than that--EVEN F**KING BETTER THAN THAT--dozens of kids are going to see these two, a realistic depiction of young love that just so happens to involve two girls, and are going to learn once and for all that there is nothing wrong with being who they are. That fact alone is f**king incredible. Yes, it sucks that season three got cut short, and we'll have even less time with Luz and Amity, but knowing how many kids have felt seen today almost makes it worth it in the end.

And if I see one mother f**ker saying this was poorly paced, I might just hunt them down for SPORT...Sorry if that was an overreaction. I'M JUST SO HAPPY! Because they're happy! Look at them. Listen to them! It's so...GAH-HAHAHA!

“They’re adorable! And deserve all the happiness!”: You're darn right, Hooty! You're darn right.

King’s Father(?) Shows Up: What the--WHAT?! They're doing this now?! Here?! After everything else?

Oh, man. What could this mean? What dynamic changes will this cause in the main cast? How could the writers fit this in during the next two episodes? And what--

Hooty Eats the Letter: ...Pfffft--HAHAHAHA!

Oh, man...I should be mad, and I wouldn't blame others if they are...but that is too much of a brilliant f**k you that I can't help but appreciate it. Bravo writers. Bravo.

WHAT I DISLIKED

...Dislikes? Dislikes? You would honestly believe that after everything I witnessed in this episode, that I would have the gull to list anything wrong with it?!

HOW DARE YOU ASSUME THAT I WOULD BE SO CALLUS TO--Actually, I do kind of have an issue with the episode's title. It's just too much of an awkward mouthful for me to get behind. I understand that the writers wanted to sneak the K into the secret message, but were there really no other titles starting with K that they couldn't come up with?

But that's just a personal issue, and in no way do I think anybody else would feel the same way. Especially with how well-written everything else is anyway.

IN CONCLUSION

"Knock Knock Knockin' on Hooty's Door" (title aside) is another A+ episode. It was hilarious, heart-wrenching, and downright adorable while keeping me entertained with every minute. I'm sure there are some issues I was willing to ignore due to how expertly written everything else was, but why bother looking for the chinks in the armor when I could just enjoy a perfect episode for being so...perfect! Some of you might be willing to disagree with me, but to that, I say: Don't knock it till you've tried it.

(Now, if you don't excuse me, I'm going to go lie down. It's...It's been a day.)

[magnus-the-maqnificent]

Let's Analyze - Alec in CoFA

So, I’ve been seeing plenty of discourse on two of my mutual’s blogs about this topic… so I thought I’d sit down and write another analysis post about my beloved Alec Lightwood cause people are still giving him shit for a book that came out ten years ago 🤦‍♀️

This is gonna be in two parts, and I'm putting both under the cut:

PART 1 - ALEC’S INSECURITIES 

So, the first part - how Alec’s insecurities drove him to saying stupid things in CoFA

A quick disclaimer - I’m NOT blaming Alec alone for his and Magnus’s break up. What happened was pretty complicated, and the blame cannot be put on one person alone. 

That said, let’s start with Magnus and Alec’s early ‘official’ relationship, in trsom.

These scenes are taken from only the first part of the book, but I’m pretty sure they’re more than enough to get a sense of Alec’s insecurities and all the chinks in their relationship. Throughout the entirety of trsom, we see more bits and pieces of Alec’s insecurities about Magnus’s sexuality, and his past and all the people he might have known - and that’s okay! Insecurities happen, cause brains are stupid like that.

But all of Alec’s insecurities could’ve been laid to rest with a simple conversation. But the conversation never happens. Magnus tends to deflect and change the topic every single time his past is brought up. I understand Magnus’s reasons for hiding his past, of course, but it doesn’t help his relationship with Alec. Magnus hiding a good chunk of his past will inevitably lead to Alec questioning himself - why is he so secretive? Why is he not telling me anything? Does he not trust me? ...and so on.

And when Alec is already feeling insecure in this relationship, this happens - (sorry about the terrible cropping btw)

And then later, while Magnus is talking to Camille,

Now… when people are insecure about something, they get irked at the smallest of things. I’m saying this as an insecure person myself. So now, you've got Alec, who's insecure as fuck, and his vacation with the person he loves got cut short by his ex who refuses to talk to anyone but him, and when they get there, his lover and his lover's ex seem to have obvious chemistry, he gets hit with the reality that his lover has dated several, probably even hundreds of people before him; and he has to leave them alone in a room so they can talk, and then he hears the ex basically just list all his shortcomings - i.e, his mortality, his appearance is compared to some random dead guy (sorry, Will) whom your lover had a crush on, which is just weird, and when you've had enough and open the door, it's to see your lover and his ex, standing close as fuck, and he's! touching! her! face! and! looking! into! her! eyes!

*takes a sip of water* yeahhhh... Alec was straight up having a bad day.

And at this point, a) Alec is still in his first relationship. He didn't get to navigate romance when he was younger, and while there's nothing wrong with that, there weren't exactly cutesy presentations titled 'how to keep your relationships healthy' floating around the internet. Heck, he didn’t know the internet. He didn't know that he had to communicate with Magnus, and it doesn't help that boy avoids conversations about feelings like the plague. And b) at this point, Alec would be facing several negative emotions - insecurity, obviously. Hurt. Helplessness, because of his mortality. Fear, that he might not live up to Magnus’s past lovers. Jealousy at seeing Magnus and Camille so close.

Negative emotions like these often tend to show up as anger or sorrow... and in Alec’s case, that would be anger. Which leads us to THIS- (🙈)

*sighs in second-hand embarrassment*

*drinks more water*

*this is gonna be so hard aksjakak*

So. Alec dealt with his insecurities... by being a mean, mean bitch to Magnus :/

Let's break this scene down, slowly, bit by bit.

First, Alec cuts into a conversation between Magnus and Jordan, when Magnus mentions Woolsey Scott, followed the rest of that particular page. To Alec, he's just a figure from Magnus’s past, and a possible lover, though in Alec’s defense Woolsey Scott WAS Magnus’s lover. This is the first instance that we see in which Alec lashes out at Magnus. It seems like he's trying to make a point to Magnus - "I don't know anything about your past, and so I don't know who you've had romances with, but I want to know." Except he makes his point in the worst way possible and ends up slutshaming Magnus.

The "What's true?" line, in response to Jordan saying "so it's true what they say about warlocks, then?" is pretty obvious. Alec is clearly not liking the idea that this random werewolf might know about warlocks, and in particular, his Warlock boyfriend.

Next... ooh boy... Alec basically snaps and in the next few paragraphs accuses Magnus of wanting to flirt with others which... is not a good look on ya honey 😕. These lines are the ones that get him accused of being biphobic... but is he really? I'm gonna talk about that in part 2.

So, in the first paragraph, where Alec makes the comments about Jordan, I find his choice of words pretty... interesting, seeing as 'messy-haired', 'broad-shouldered' and 'chiseled-good-looks' are all used to describe Alec in the series. Not sure if its relevant, but definitely interesting.

And in the next one, where Alec says, "or there are plenty of pretty girls here, since apparently your taste goes both ways. Is there anything you aren't into?" The 'apparently' makes me curious. In rsom, Alec mentions that he's only recently heard of the term bisexual, and there's plenty of time between rsom and cofa, so Alec should be absolutely sure of atleast the basic meaning of bisexuality. But I'm pretty sure it's just inconsistency on cc's part, since if rsom didn't exist, this book would be the first time Alec learns about Magnus’s bisexuality. (Which is obvious when you look at the scene after Magnus reveals that Camille is his girlfriend.) And as for the second sentence, I feel like it's a fallback to earlier in the book when Magnus says (I'm just gonna write the dialogue from memory), "I've dated men, women, warlocks, faeries, vampires, werewolves and even a djinn or two." Here, Alec is angry, and he takes the knowledge that Magnus has dated a variety of people and once again, lashes out.

Looking at all of it together, Alec’s insecurities are definitely a factor in all of this. We know Alec has pretty low self esteem in tmi, and he keeps having irrational thoughts about someone else grabbing Magnus’s attention, like in the trsom scene I've posted above. And he ends up taking out his insecurities on Magnus.

Was it wrong of Alec to say all those things to Magnus? Yes, absolutely. But looking back through all his scenes in cofa, it's easy to see how he could've fallen into the pit trap of emotions.

And before anyone says "but it wasn't addressed in the later books", it was, in CoLS. I’ve hit the image limit, so I'm just gonna type it out -

"[Magnus] said it would be better if he didn’t come. Apparently him and the Seelie Queen have some kind of history."

Isabelle raised her eyebrows.

"Not that kind of history," Alec said irritably. "Some kind of feud. Though," he added, half under his breath, "the way he got around before me, I wouldn't be surprised."

"Alec!" Isabelle dropped back to talk to her brother....

So, there. Alec makes yet another slutshaming comment, Isabelle overhears and is clearly not happy about it, and it's clearly implied that she talks to Alec about it. And Alec doesn't make any more slutshaming comments since then. Boy now knows what he did was wrong, and makes sure not to repeat it again.

Although, I do wish we had more than this. I wish we had more of Magnus and Alec talking about this argument, heck, even about all their arguments and the reasons they broke up, but you can't get everything you want, apparently :(

And now onto the next part...

PART 2 - IS ALEC BIPHOBIC?

The short answer, uh, no, not really.

The long answer.... would be complicated.

So, back in the day, when this discourse was at an all time high, I remember reading a bisexual person's essay about this topic, and they said that this comment from Alec - "or there are plenty of pretty girls here, since apparently your taste goes both ways. Is there anything you aren't into?" - would be a biphobic microagression.

According to Google, a microagression is "a statement, action, or incident regarded as an instance of indirect, subtle, or unintentional discrimination against members of a marginalized group such as a racial or ethnic minority".

And in Alec's case, IF his words were biphobic, they were completely unintentional. They were microagressive. Which is... still bad, of course, but it's more complicated than that.

If you look back on Alec's supposedly biphobic statements, they're more about Magnus’s hypersexuality and promiscuity than anything else. Yes, even the line i mentioned like two paragraphs ago. At first glance it may seem like a direct attack on Magnus’s sexuality, but think over the explanation I gave for the line and it will make sense. And a lot of people know that the whole 'bi people fuck around a lot and are cheaters' thing is a stereotype.

Now, it may seem like I'm going off topic here, but bear with me. I couple of days ago, I watched this video by chance. (Tw for the aids crisis and lots of biphobia, not from the narrator, if you wanna watch the video). Basically, back in the 1980s, bisexual men were scapegoated for spreading aids to the straight community and were vilified by popular media as being promiscuous scepters who would cheat on their wives with gay men and then give aids to their wives. (Yikes 😬). And since bisexuality was practically unheard of before all this (several bisexual activists have stated that all this shit, though unfortunate, pulled bisexuality out of the closet), it's safe to assume that this is how those stereotypes came to be - through 1980s propaganda.

But living with this propaganda is... a very limiting experience. The people who leaned and unlearned and fought against this propaganda are mostly US Americans who grew up with it, either the actual propaganda itself or passed down by their parents. But like I said, it's a very limiting experience. US is but one country out of many, and even for those living in the USA there's a chance that they grew up in a very hush-hush environment. People who grew up hearing all these stereotypes will see it as biphobia, while people who didn't - like Alec, and me, and several other people will not. A lot of people grow up with absolutely no knowledge of the queer community, and chances are that they'll be incredibly confused when a stereotype is pointed out to them, and they often get no more explanation than 'this is a harmful stereotype'. Queer experiences aren't the same for everyone, and while I respect the people who see this as biphobia, they should recognize that there are many people who won't see it that way.

I have seen bisexual people say that Alec's words were biphobic, and I've also seen bisexual people say that they weren't. Thus, there is no clear consensus about whether or not Alec was being biphobic. And like I said earlier, Alec grew up far, far away from mundane anti-queer bigotry. He was essentially a clean slate when it came to knowledge of eer microagressions of any kind, because microagressions and stereotypes are often incredibly specific, don't have anything to do with a person's race/sexuality/gender, etc. and will make zero sense unless you know the history behind them. To Magnus, who lived through the anti-bisexual scapegoating, the words would've definitely stung, but Alec didn't even know the implications he would be making with this words! Of course, the impact is greater than intention, and I imagine Magnus would sit Alec down one day and talk about all this history with him.

And idk if I can even blame cc cause the history of bisexual men is RARELY ever talked about, atleast on the internet.

Also, this scene in cofa is the only instance where he can be interpreted to be biphobic. Nowhere else in all of tmi, and even tec, do we see Alec express hatred or disgust or microagression towards bisexual people. If this was seen in a repeating pattern from Alec, one could argue that he's biphobic... but he isn't. Some might point to some of his internal thoughts in trsom to argue otherwise, but I believe that actions are superior than thoughts.

There's also the thing about unlearning prejudices, but in Alec's case there was hardly anything to be unlearned. The only prejudices he did pick up on were against himself, through vague homophobic comments from Robert.

P.S if you've read this far, I am legally entitled to compensation for thinking of cofa Alec for 48 hours. Put your favorite Alec moments in my askbox cause I wanna focus on his good side now. 😎

But yeah, the main thing here is that Alec has grown from his mistakes, apologized, and hasn't repeated this behavior at all.

And lastly, I just wanted to add - I don't think all this was unintentional on the author's part. She's grown up with the us American queer community, and has mentioned that she has bisexual friends, who have no doubt faced prejudices because of these stereotypes. I think she was trying to condemn making such statements, but a lot of people don't read between the lines and end up misinterpreting it and make both the character and her to be biphobic.

So... TLDR; was what Alec said biphobic? Maybe. It depends on who you're talking to. Is Alec, as a person, biphobic? Nope. Not at all. 😌

[barnesbabee]

𝓹𝓵𝓪𝔂 𝓭𝓪𝓽𝓮 - 𝓽𝔀𝓮𝓷𝓽𝔂

|| ᴍᴀꜱᴛᴇʀʟɪꜱᴛ || ⇜ᴘʀᴇᴠɪᴏᴜꜱ - 20 - ɴᴇxᴛ⟿

⟿ ꜱᴜᴍᴍᴀʀʏ: No sensible person would turn down their boss if they looked good as good as Seonghwa. But maybe they would wish they had…

⟿ ᴄᴏɴᴄᴇᴘᴛ: CEO!Seonghwa x reader, bestfriend!Yunho x reader || Social Media!AU || no gender specified for the reader

A/N: IM SO SORRY IT TOOK SO LONG

ᴛᴀɢʟɪꜱᴛ: (send me a DM or an ask to be added) @ateezappreciation @shinyddeonghwa @lilithpooped @cloudyyeonnie@yeosangmystar @wooyoung-a @sanisms @mingismoon @lovelyvitamin @anawwyd @annasbannas @im-just-trying-to-survive-man @uglychildd @oddlittlefandomist @hwahomie @jin-neck-shaft @lovelyvitamin @yeosangmystar @skmoonchild @lovelymultiwrites @sunwooyoung

The day was long and silent, and although no one had gotten any sleep, no one could close their eyes for more than a minute. The haunting picture of Yunho's dead body and splattered blood clouding their minds. The only one who hadn't seen the body yet was Jongho, but he was too busy trying to make sure Mingi wouldn't freak out again.

The five of you eventually fell asleep, when your bodies finally calmed down and gave in to the temptation.

You were, however, suddenly awoken by a loud noise of something falling. All of you sat up straight in the living room and looked around. There were only four of you. Mingi.

All of you stood up immediately and began searching the house in a panicked state, calling out for Mingi as you did so.

"Are you fucking kidding me!?" Seonghwa yelled, after a couple of minutes of looking.

You all ran towards where he was. You found Seonghwa holding a crying Mingi by the arm, in the attic of the house.

"What happened?" You asked.

Seonghwa roughly pushed Mingi towards you all.

"I got here and this dumbass had opened the skylight and was trying to get onto the roof!"

San held Mingi's hand and moved the man to stand behind him, angrily looking at Seonghwa.

"Hey man, take it easy." San advised.

Seonghwa placed his hands on his hips and widened his eyes.

"Take it easy? Take. It. Easy!? There's already a dead body in my fucking house, from a situation that I had nothing to do with, mind you, and I was about to have a second body to bury because of this fool's bad choices. I am helping you idiots out a lot and you're pushing me to the limits, okay!? I have a lot to lose here. I have a company to run and a lot of people that are going to lose jobs if the CEO goes down as an accessory to murder."

There was only silence, as it dawned on the selfish group what they were asking of Seonghwa.

"I'm sorry." San said, not even able to lift up his head and look Seonghwa in the eye.

The latter shook his head and walked away.

"I'm leaving the house. Keep an eye on that douchebag."

The sound of the front door slamming echoed in the house, and all of you felt incredibly embarrassed. Once you got back to the living room, Jongho surprised all of you. He sat Mingi down on the couch and stared down at him.

"I'm tired, Mingi. I really am. You made those two go out into the woods to fetch a dead body, you made them scrub blood off of walls and off the floor, you made Seonghwa, who doesn't even like you by the way, he's doing this for Y/N, hide a body in his house, and you were going to kill yourself!? Are you that much of a fucking coward!? Mingi you're not 16. You're a grown man, you're almost 22, it's about time you start taking accountability for your actions, we can't baby you forever, 'cause it's getting tiring. We're all desperate here, and we have to worry about yourselves, about dead Yunho, and now about an unstable manchild. Focus on the fucking reality Mingi."

Jongho was straight-up yelling by the end of his rant, eyes nearly bulging out of their sockets and face red, out of anger. He then stormed off, just like Seonghwa, leaving a very quiet and tense room.

San sighed and sat next to his friend.

"You know, he's right Mingi. Maybe should've worded it better, but you really can't do what you were about to do... You were about to screw us all over when we are risking our lives to help you. This isn't just about you anymore."

Mingi could only nod, and cry, as his aching throat wouldn't allow him to do anything else.

You sighed and stood up.

"I'm... I'm gonna go find Seonghwa, I need to apologize."

You picked up your coat from the coat hanger near the door.

"You know where he is?" San asked.

"I have an idea..."

You were sure he was back at the office. He felt comfortable there, it was a place where he could take his head off of all his worries. Also, he kept his best whiskey in his office... It wasn't very far from his house, but you were impatient, you needed some time alone with him desperately. You showed your pass to the security by the entrance and they let you through, as you hurriedly made your way to the CEO's office.

You could hear two voices chatting from the inside, you didn't quite recognize the other person, but you were pretty sure it was Hongjoong. You knocked on the door softly, ignoring the big 'do not disturb' sign.

"I- Hongjoong what the fuck didn't I ask you to put the sign outside!?" You could hear Seonghwa ask.

You heard his heavy footsteps walk closer to the door and for a second you were afraid, maybe you shouldn't have come...

The door opened slowly before you, however, interrupting your thoughts.

"My apologies but I'm currently- oh it's you baby." Seonghwa pulled you in a big bear hug as soon as he realized who you were.

You hugged him back, a little hesitant with Hongjoong seeing you two acting romantically. Seonghwa realized you were a little stiff and pulled away, then realizing what the discomfort was about once he saw you looking at Hongjoong.

"Oh, I told him... I hope it's fine. He's kind of known from the beginning."

You closed the door behind you and followed Seonghwa into his office, as you looked at Hongjoong with an 'oh really?' look, making him chuckle.

"Well I did try to call dibs on you when you got hired but he got salty about it, and then every time I made a comment about you he'd get mad. I still did it though, I knew something was going on and I wanted him to tell me." Hongjoong explained as he smiled brightly.

"Yeah yeah good times, why don't you tell them about 'wanting to bend them over your desk and making them beg'?"

Hongjoong's head perked up and his eyes widened, as his ears turned bright red.

"Seonghwa what the fuck-" He whispered, feeling a little uncomfortable in the room.

You were a little embarrassed, but also proud.

"It's fine, plus," Seonghwa got up from his chair and stood behind you, grabbing your hips in the process "they like it. They love to hear how they want to get fucked, isn't that right, Y/N?"

You pressed your thighs together and kept your gaze focused on the ground. Seonghwa gripped your jaw and forced you to look at Hongjoong.

"I- I do like to hear that..."

Hongjoong chuckled and got closer to you, inspecting your body from head to toe.

"You're one lucky son of a bitch, Seonghwa..."

Seonghwa rolled his hips against your ass, so you could feel his boner.

"Hmm, I am aren't I..."

You chuckled and decided to take the opportunity. You knew Seonghwa liked to relieve his stress with sex, and you owed him at least this much for helping you out.

"What's so funny, doll?" Seonghwa asked, curious about your chuckle.

"I was just thinking about all the times you called me a filthy whore, when you're the one practically begging to have a threesome with me and your best friend... Who's the whore now?" You teased, knowing you were pushing all the right buttons.

"Ooh, are you gonna let them talk to you like that."

Seonghwa chuckled as he gripped your throat.

"No, I'm not."

He turned you around and pushed your body against a wall, keeping you trapped by his own body.

"You know which buttons to push doll, maybe I'll reward you for that later. But now, you're going to take this cock in that pretty little hole of yours, and then you'll suck off Hongjoong. Wouldn't want him to feel left out, would we?" Seonghwa asked, with a devilish smirk.

"No sir, we would not." You replied, wearing the same smirk.

Seonghwa felt as if he was falling in love with you right there and then, he felt like he finally found the perfect match, but he could leave the sappy shit for later.

The man placed a short, but intense kiss to your lips before gripping your hair and guiding you to kneel in front of Hongjoong.

"Come on baby, show him what you can do, make me proud."

You smirked and looked up at Hongjoong, as you worked in taking off his suit pants. You slipped them off, along with his boxers, and his hard dick nearly slapped you in the face. It wasn't huge but damn was it pretty. You teased him a little, licking a long stripe, from the base to the tip, teasing the head with your tongue, causing him to groan.

"They always like this?"

"Yeah, they like to see me suffer, but it doesn't last long 'cause..." Seonghwa paused and knelt right beside you, pushing your head so Hongjoong's cock would be fully in your mouth "I'm impatient. But they like it rough."

Seonghwa sat on his desk, as he watched his best friend fuck your mouth, slowly. He pumped his cock to the same pace your head moved, and you'd soon start hearing small groans from both men.

"Shit, Y/N, on all fours."

You complied, pulling out of Hongjoong. He groaned at the cold air hitting his member, as he missed your mouth already. Seonghwa knelt behind you, and entered you very slowly. Hongjoong was about to put his dick back in your mouth, but your partner stopped him.

"Y/N, colour?"

"Green, very green."

Seonghwa smiled and slapped your ass lightly, then giving Hongjoong the green light to continue.

You had to hold off your orgasm a couple of times, as the feeling of both men filling you up and the sound of their needy moans was too much to handle.

"Do you wanna cum?" Seonghwa asked, figuring it out from how much you were clenching.

"I'm almost there baby, you can cum, cum for us."

A couple more thrusts and a spank from Seonghwa were all it took to take you over the edge. It didn't take both men much to 'cross the line' either, Hongjoong painting your face with his cum, and Seonghwa your ass. Their moans combined was something you secretly wanted to hear again.

Seonghwa picked you up, bridal style, and looked at you.

"Come on man, I wanted to kiss her." Seonghwa complained, as your lips were stained by Hongjoong's cum.

Hongjoong felt embarrassed, after coming down from the high he wasn't as confident as Seonghwa.

"Are you okay darling?" Your partner asked, brushing your hair away from your face.

You just nodded.

Seonghwa and Hongjoong helped clean you up and both got dressed.

"I guess you should go deal with the... situation."

You looked at Hongjoong with a confused face, as you zipped up your trousers.

"Situation?" You asked.

"Remember when I said I told him everything? I meant everything."

You widened your eyes once you realized what he meant.

"Seonghwa are you insane!?"

"Calm down Y/N, he's not snitching on anyone! Plus I needed to tell someone who was on my side. I was going insane with your friends constantly baying Mingi."

You sighed. You really couldn't be mad at him for it. You hugged him and kissed his cheek.

"You're right... I'm sorry I got you involved at all and thank you."

Seonghwa kissed the top of your head.

"It's fine, let's just get this over with so I can be with you."

Your bid goodbye to a (still) very embarrassed Hongjoong and left, so you could go back home and deal with the drama. You wished you could just take the car and run away, and live by yourselves until it all washed away, but it wasn't that simple. And it was about to get even more complicated.

When you got to the house and opened the door, a weeping Jongho stood over San's limp body.

"What!? What the fuck happened!?" Seonghwa asked as you and him rushed to check on San.

"I- I don't know! I left after you did" He said, hinting at Seonghwa "and when I came back Mingi wasn't here and San was on the ground. He's still breathing but I don't know what happened."

"What!? Why did you leave?" Seonghwa asked.

"Everyone was upset at Mingi for constantly behaving like a child and Jongho yelled at him and told him to stop expecting us to baby him and that he had to take responsibility for his actions, it got too much and Jongho had to leave for some air..." You explained.

"Responsibility for his actions?..." Seonghwa repeated to himself, trying to figure out what happened, and suddenly a sad idea popped into his head.

He ran into the garage, leaving you and Jongho confused, and holding San.

The man came back just as quickly, looking preoccupied and horrified.

"The body is gone."

[headinthestaticsky]

The Phenomenon of the Immortal Sun: Jasper Hale x Fleur Swan, Chapter 1

Summary: It was time for Fleur Swan to become Fleur Hale/Whitlock. She has started to adjust to the lifestyle of a vegetarian vampire as well as her powers, which she seems to develop a new one once in a while. But what happens when something happens that none of the Cullens are prepared for.

"Nature will get her way Though you took her for a fool Walking on the lake Frozen under you."

Run Cried the Crawling by, Anges Obel

When Bella got home from Vegas with Edward at her side it was the most pissed off my dad had ever been at her. He knew she would throw out the "I'll move away." Card on him but he wasn't fazed by it anymore. She was married, and a adult... he couldn't stop her. It was satisfying to see dad finally stand up to her, letting go of the fear of losing her. Bella eventually developed a guilty look on her face while Edward tensed by her side. She decided that she would have her honeymoon after Jasper and I got married, since dad would know we would both be out of the house. It confused me since she would have to wait 5 months just to go on her honeymoon, it also delayed her changing into a vampire. Since they both agreed to do it on there honeymoon.

Regarding me however my eyes are still a dark red rose color, which completely puzzled the Cullens. It confused me as well...knowing that after a year of transformation my eyes should be golden by now. I had never drunken an once of human blood but, my eyes were just as red as they were when I first turned. My blood lust got a lot better and I was beginning to gain control of my powers. It turns out I am also a shape shifter in a sense... I can transform myself into anyone I wanted to be. Things seemed to have calmed down it was nice to have a moment of serenity.

I stood in my room which was now void of my items being out on display. They were instead all in boxes stacked up on top of each other. Dad helped me out earlier in the day, it was nice to spend so one-on-one time with him while I still lived here. Bella was packing up too, excited to finally leave the house and become a vampire. She wouldn't let dad help her out however and spent her time locked up in her room. Probably waiting for Edward to enter and talk with her. I just sat down on my bed looking at my surroundings when I heard Jasper enter through my window.

"I was waiting for you to show up." I said grabbing him by the collar of his shirt and pulling him in for a kiss.

"Mmm, hello to you too." Jasper said.

"You're not going to believe who accepted my RVSP'd to the wedding..."

"Who is it?"

"My mom, her new husband is coming with her too."

"I hope they won't cause any trouble." Jasper grumbled.

"Well... the last thing I said to her was when I moved back down here when I was 15...I told her that next time I see her would be at my wedding. I then told her that she would enjoy the the open bar and her speech for me would be her barfing all over the place. So umm... be prepared for that to happen." I explained trying to hold in a laugh at the face Jasper made.

"Damn love...you're brutal sometimes."

"Thank you... that is so sweet to say!"

"You better get down to our place... Alice and Rosalie are waiting for you so they can throw you a Bachelorette party."

"Yeah... they'll probably break the house trying to get to me." I said and then began to laugh.

"Have fun darlin." Jasper said softly.

"You too, if Emmett, Edward, and Dean got you a stripper I will murder all of them."

"Don't worry about that darlin, we're merely going out to the woods to hunt bears... maybe a few mountain lions. Besides Edward won't be there anyway"

"Oh fun...wait, Edward won't be there?"

"Yeah... it seems he still holds a grudge after I called him a boy before the battle."

"Only a boy would be offended by that." I said

"I better go love you." Jasper replied and pecked my cheek.

"Love you too." I did the same thing, pecking his cheek. He left a few seconds afterward leaving me alone. I pulled on pair of boots and ran downstairs.

"I'll see you later dad, Rose and Alice are throwing me a little party."

"Alright Petal, love you."

"Love you too!"

I arrived at the Cullen's house in record time, my tracking ability had improved greatly. I zoomed up to the door and before I could open it Rosalie, Esme, Bree, and Alice stood there with excited smiles on their faces.

"The party has arrived." I said jokingly.

They all laughed and ushered me into the lounge room.

Bree had been living with us ever since the end of the battle, she struggled to conform to the diet after living off of human blood so long and she couldn't leave the house much since she was presumed dead. But Jasper has been helping her out a lot.

"I can't wait to see what you did with the venue outside... can I take a look?"

"No, you may not, Rosalie and I all agreed that you shouldn't see it until tomorrow. It'll be great with the pictures."

"Okay okay... is the dress finished?"

"Yes, now that you can see." Rosalie said, dragging me down to her room. A large vanity was set up with hundreds of makeup products. I turned around and saw my dress... it was beautiful.

(I know the dresses aren't exactly the same but just pretend the one showing off the back of the dress has sleeves haha.)

a"Oh my gosh Rose, you know my style so well."

"You're going to look beautiful tomorrow." Esme said, her gracious smile still on her face.

"Thank you guys so much... for everything."

"No problem Fleur, I can't wait for you to officially be a part of the family." Alice replied.

"So, how is everything back at home?" Rosalie said, already playing with my hair.

"It's tense...dad's pissed at Bella, Bella is pissed at dad. I still can't believe she actually eloped."

"Doesn't surprise me any... Bella's priorities have certainly changed." Alice grumbled.

"Yeah... not gonna lie though Alice they've always been like that, she just hid it from you guys pretty well."

"Yeah... I guess so." Alice said disappointment was on her face.

"Let's talk about something else...Fleur, did Jasper tell you where you two were going for your honeymoon?"

"No... he wants it to be a surprise, I can't wait to see where we're going."

"I'm sure it's going to be fun." Alice said, nudging me playfully.

"If I could blush right now, I would." I said.

Timeskip: The next day.

"Rosalie this is like we rehearsed it... smile and don't kill my mother." I reminded her.

"I'll try my best... Why does Bella have to be a bridesmaid again?" She said, brushing back my long black hair.

"Because I don't need my mother talking my ear off saying how selfish I am."

I saw Alice shake her head before going back to steaming my dress in the background.

"Fleur, Rosalie? Where are you guys?" I heard my dad call out.

"In here dad!" I called back.

"Renee get your butt up here your daughter is getting married. Get over this stupid grudge." I heard dad yell. Rosalie, Alice, and I all laughed.

"Aww, you look beautiful Petal." Dad said, smiling at me. I said Renee in the background she had a shocked look on her face.

"Thanks, Dad, you can thank Rosalie and Alice for all of this. Mom? You gonna come over? I'm not infected with anything you know."

She scoffed and walked up to me, we both gave each other fake smiles.

"Did you get plastic surgery? Your face looks... I don't know more sculpted." She said.

"No mother I just aged... the last time you saw me I was 15, I'm 20 now." I lied, everyone knew most vampires' facial features perfected when fully changed. But I couldn't exactly tell her that.

"Okay..." She said in a skeptical voice. I heard Rosalie growl behind me.

"Renee knock it off." Dad said he had a curt look on his face.

"Well since it's your wedding day we thought you needed something blue." Renee started, her face didn't look too happy.

"And something old, besides your mother." Dad joked, Rosalie and Alice let out a chuckle.

"Nice Charlie," Renee said rolling her eyes.

Dad then opened a jewelry box that had a hairpiece in it. I knew it was grandma swans.

"It was Grandma Swans, I added the Sapphires though, I thought it matched your ring pretty well. When the time comes around you can give it to your daughter." Dad said he handed it to Rosalie so she could put it in my hair.

"Aww thank you so much dad." I said I was lucky I didn't have my dress on yet so I could hug him.

"Should've saved this for Bella." Renee grumbled quitely.

"Oh no I forgot her veil, Rose could you come with me?" Alice asked.

Rosalie hesitated before answering.

"Sure..." They walked out a few seconds later.

"So... you stuck true to your guns. I didn't see you until your wedding day." Dad just looked at the two of us and walked out.

"Yep."

"How many men did you date before you got engaged to this one. I know how bored you can get." Renee said, implying I sleep around a lot.

"He's the first and only man I've dated." Renee's reflection was shocked in the mirror.

"Well... I knew my Bella would do that but... not, you." She said in a condescending voice.

"You have no idea what Bella has done."

"So who is he?" Renee said, ignoring my previous statement.

"His name is Jasper and he's an amazing, kind human being." I answered back, pride-filled my voice. I could suddenly feel Bella's presence behind the wall in the other room listening in on us.

"Sure... we all know women like you say that when the men have slept with you."

"You're childish insults do not bother me anymore mother."

"What childish insults? I'm stating facts." Renee said, acting innocent.

"Yeah, facts you convinced yourself are true."

"All I know is if my Bella wouldn't gotten married so young. So let's cut to the chase how far along are you?"

'I'm not pregnant Renee, I need to go help Rose and Alice find that veil." I got up to walk away when I got an idea.

"Oh by the way, Bella got married at nineteen in Vegas."

Renee just stood there in shock. I smiled in satisfaction.

"Enjoy the open bar!"

[anystalker707]

You wish (1/2)

Pairing: Frank Iero x [non-binary, afab] Reader Word counting: ~ 2 200 Genre: Enemies to lovers Summary: Reader is the only one who doesn't take Frank's shit, but all the bickering eventually turns into flirting.

Requested on Wattpad

A sigh escapes my lips as I finish cleaning the last glass and put it under the counter along with the others before setting the cloth aside. It's going to be a busy night because, apparently, a band is going to play in the club tonight and that usually brings a lot of people in. On the other hand, at least Mikey is helping me today – let's hope he doesn't fuck up with anything, but if he does, it's Gerard's problem and not mine, after all.

"Hello," a guy greets as sitting down on one of the stools.

I raise an eyebrow at him, glancing at his clothes; white, with a hand drawn black symbol on the shirt. Probably someone from the staff considering we haven't opened yet. The club is empty apart from me, the cleanse people and the ones putting the stage up. "Hi."

"A beer, please." He presses his lips together into a smile, watching me moving to grab what he asked, pouring the drink into a glass before I set it in front of him and throw the can away. "Thank you..." It's clear he wants to know my name, but I don't say anything, carrying on with my job, and proceed to clean the empty area of the counter. He frowns. "What's your name? Nice to meet you, I'm Frank."

"I'm just the one in charge of the bar," I reply simply. Giving attention to everyone isn't something very wise to do and something I didn't learn easily; most of the idiots sitting around the bar will just insult me in the moment I reject them or say gross things, so talks certainly should be avoided. Even if it isn't from a customer.

"Aw, you're not funny!" His words don't sound genuine tho, the disappointment is hidden under certain amusement. "'Bet you don't have many clients while acting like that!"

Cool, just like predicted. To be honest, getting rid of this stain here is more interesting.

"Hi, hi," Mikey greets and I glance back to see him walking in with a smile, "oh, hey, Frank! Didn't know you'd be the one playing here tonight!" He moves to next to Frank leaning his side against the counter. I observe them for a brief moment – so Mikey knows the punk, huh?

"Yeah," Frank replies excitedly, "Gerard could help us with it, so..." He shrugs, smiling. "Didn't know you work here, either."

"I don't," Mikey chuckles. "I just help here once in a while."

"Laze around, you mean," I add, glaring at Mikey. He gasps, widening his eyes, but I speak up before he's able to say anything. "Not to mention that your last time here costed us two glasses, you butter fingers. Thank hell Gerard is the only one to be scolded!"

"C'mon, you know how difficult it is to handle these," he groans. "You're just being annoying."

"And rude," Frank adds under his breath. "'Won't talk with me."

Mikey raises an eyebrow at Frank before chuckling. "Not surprising. I wouldn't talk with you either if you showed up like that, even more knowing how you can be—"

"Stop, you're supposed to be helping me!"

"(Y/n) is just this way, c'mon!" Mikey shrugs. "And you're annoying. I bet they were just doing their work." He glares, moving to serve Frank a can of soda this time after he pushed his glass forward while muttering something. I can't help but to glance at them with an amused smirk, having fun in watching how Frank shoots me a bitter look and Mikey is being suspiciously nice today.

"Cut off the sweet talk, Mikey," I say as approaching them, putting the cloth away for real this time. "I'll love you more if you work more. And you." I turn to Frank. "Yeah, you're annoying."

While Mikey chuckles, a long and dramatic whine comes from Frank. "You just met me! You're the annoying one! And even rude!"

"I don't go around attacking people for free, Frank." I shrug, leaning back against the counter with a sigh. "And insulting me because I didn't do what you wanted me to? What are you, five?" I hold back a chuckle, rolling my eyes. Part of what I'm doing is because I am not going to take his shit, but it is also entertaining seeing how Frank can react.

As predicted, the night ends up being quite agitated, but Mikey and I do have a break during the concert since people focus more on the music instead of getting drinks, what gives us the opportunity to pay attention to it too. It's a bit difficult seeing them – LeATHERMOUTH, that's the name – because of the low stage and huge crowd, in a way most of what I can see resumes itself to Frank jumping around like crazy, though he sometimes disappears in what I presume to be kneeling on the ground and my suppositions he has any sanity left are erased when I see him with the cable wrapped around his head. Cool.

Frank returns after the show is over, asking for a drink and, once again, using that shitty attitude that I do not take.

Through the time, Frank's band makes more shows in the club and, if it wasn't for Mikey there – consequently –, I probably wouldn't be sharing any word with him again. He is annoying. It is literally impossible to talk to him for longer than five seconds without being attacked and receiving a rude remark, even if it turns into some kind of weird flirting through the time.

I suppress a sharp sigh when seeing Frank approaching after another show came to an end – even so, it's still early in the night and another band took over when they left the stage.

"G'night, what d'you want?" Pete, who is also working in the bar today – because Mikey couldn't make it due to something related to Electric Century, if I'm not wrong –, is free and approaches Frank in the moment he takes a seat on a stool across the counter. Thank hell, maybe I don't have to deal with the dumbass today.

"I actually want (y/n) to fix me a drink, thank you," Frank replies without any pity and I need to hold back a chuckle at Pete's reaction; Frank smirks a bit as meeting my gaze.

Throwing the Cosmopolitan in the glass, I push it towards the woman, finally moving towards Frank. "Hey, rat, good concert. Would've been better if you weren't there." I grin, leaning forward on the counter with my hands on the edge of it.

"Very funny!" He rolls his eyes, twisting his mouth a bit. "I bet watching me performing would be the best part of your night if it actually wasn't talking with me."

"You wish, you're always counting the seconds to come here annoy me," I breathe, shaking my head. "Anyways, what do you want?"

"I'm actually not up for much alcohol today..." Frank hums thoughtful as looking at all the drinks behind me while placing his elbow over the counter and resting his cheek against his palm. "I was going for a Manhattan, but fix me a Spritz instead."

"As you wish," I mutter while moving to grab the bottles I need then coming back to prepare the drink.

"So, Mikey isn't here today?" Frank asks and I slowly nod in response.

"Yeah," I reply after a moment, having been focused on getting the right quantity of each drink in a way it isn't too bitter or too boozy, just as he likes it, "apparently he had something else to do, so we fixed someone else." I mix everything before throwing it inside a glass with ice, adding a rosemary branch for the looks, and push it towards him. "I needed to endure you moaning your ass off on that stage all by myself, unfortunately."

Frank snorts as taking the drink, shaking his head to himself. "Shut up, you wish you were the one to be making me moan like that." He takes a sip of the drink and raises his eyebrows lightly, quickly taking another sip of it.

I roll my eyes, not worrying if my reaction is dramatic as I pretend to gag. "I actually wish I was the one wrapping the cable around your neck, y'know?"

"Aw, babe," Frank groans, looking up at me from under his eyelashes, "I'd love that."

The words set a silence between us for a moment, in which I glare at Frank with disbelief and he's got that fake innocent look on, batting his eyelashes while looking at me. His look gives me this weird feeling in my chest, but I look away before I can identify whether it's good or bad, cursing under my breath at the same time he starts laughing.

"You're terrible," I tell Frank, moving away once seeing a guy taking a seat.

"A Paloma, please," the guy asks and I nod, moving to do as asked.

"I'm the best, actually," Frank replies in his usual smug tone and I can't help but to laugh, sarcastically agreeing.

"Here." I hand the guy his drink, sighing as moving to take a few empty glasses away from the counter and hand it to Pete so he can go clean them.

"Thank you, baby." The guy winks at me and here we go again. I ignore him. "What's your name? You a cutie, aren't yah? When is your shift over? Maybe I could take you home," he insists, but his words just turn into a background noise that I try to ignore as moving to the back to put away the bottles I've used. "Oh, you gonna play it difficult? 'Bet you—"

"Can you please leave them alone?" Frank's voice cuts in and I need to glance back to make sure I'm not making things up and there is Frank, glaring at the guy. "C'mon, man, if they're not giving you attention, that's a no. Accept it nicely and don't make it obvious how frustrated with yourself you are."

"Who even do you think you are?" The guy retorts bitterly.

"I'm just—"

"Y'know what, I'm not coming here anymore," the guy grumbles to himself and just downs the drink before he stands up and disappears among the crowd. Frank and I share a confused look before shrugging.

"Thank you, I guess," I sigh as walking back to Frank, leaning on the counter with my forearms over it and we're about the same level. I observe him for a moment, thinking about what he did, and there's this feeling in my stomach again. Butterflies? No, no, no. Not for him. I try my best to not let him know about what's going in my mind, not looking away from him.

"Don't worry." He smirks and that's just Frank. He's always smug and convinced of himself, not afraid of saying what he thinks or feels. What an idiot. For real, I like it. "You deserved it."

"Honestly, I don't know how to react," I confess, "because, since we met, it's been sounding like you're going to throw me from a cliff in the moment you have the opportunity to."

"I'm not like that, (y/n)," he breathes, eyes drifting down for a second as he bites back an awkward smile. "I, um— You're actually really nice. I just like fucking around with you." He shrugs and looks down at his glass, playing a bit with the remaining ice cubes. I keep observing him, not replying, so he looks at me again, raising an eyebrow.

Y'know what? Fuck it.

I glance down at Frank's lips and a red tone immediately takes over his cheeks with it, but I just lean in and am actually surprised by him meeting me halfway. I can still taste the Spritz on his lips, faintly, what ends up irrelevant under how nice and surprisingly soft they feel against mine. His mustache brushes lightly against the skin under my nose, tickling it, something I try to ignore as cupping his face and deepening the kiss as he places his hand over mine.

There's this feeling in my stomach again, followed by a nice tingling sensation that goes down my spine while a warm sensation fills my chest. Okay; it feels right, for once.

"I'm driving you home," Frank mutters against my lips, a bit breathless, just like me.

"Yeah, that'd be nice." I smirk a bit as we gaze at each other for a moment and I'm not sure about what'd happen next, but we are interrupted by Pete before I can find out. Idiot.

"Stop making out and go back to work, (y/n)," he calls from the other side of the bar and I sigh heavily, rolling my eyes as I move towards the couple who just approached the counter. "I'm going to tell Mikey about it!"

"You are not going to tell Mikey!" I glare at Pete before turning to the couple, asking what they want and quickly putting myself to prepare the two Martinis.

______

Part 2

[spicyfoodboi]

Hey, I know your requests are always open and I kinda wanna request something. It's gonna be vaguely angsty though. So I'm (usually) a silent crier and I almost always only let myself cry when people aren't around. So I was wondering you could maybe write a hurt/comfort type scenario like that with either Shinsou, Todoroki, or Amajiki. It's okay if you don't get to it or don't have inspiration for it or something. I just figured I'd ask just in case you did.

aching silence

Genre: comfort

Warning: mentions of insecurities present (in Amajiki's part)

A Hitoshi Shinso, Tamaki Amajiki, and Shoto Todoroki x reader

a/n: hey guys! Like I said in my last post that I'm gonna experiment with tags so if you see them in different tags or I add more or if there are only 5 in the first hour, that's why. Requests are open so please don't be shy in requesting anything! Let's get on with it.

 Hitoshi Shinso

He was out for the day with his new class 1-A friends.

You weren't around with him a lot recently.

You made yourself think that it was okay never to be a burden since you were little.

You kept your problems under lock and key, making sure that you don't bother anyone with your problems.

That includes your boyfriend, Shinso.

He told you before that he doesn't mind to share your burdens with you.

But you couldn't believe that for a second.

You thought that the second that you tell him everything that's been bothering you, he would push you away and leave you in the dust.

You didn't want that.

Now here you are, in the corner in the bedroom, a spot covered in darkness, you were sure if he does come home that he would never find you.

You held your knees up to your chest, nuzzling your face into them to wipe your tears away.

You must've been sitting in the dark for a hours but it felt like only a few minutes.

A few minutes of darkness was supposed to be enough.

You hear the front door open and the muffled voice of the purple-haired boy calling for you echoing around the seemingly empty house.

The voice made you tense up, pushing yourself up closer to the wall if that was even possible.

You hear the creaking of the bedroom door and you can just feel the pair of eyes scanning the bedroom, seeing the messy bed and the cluttered pillows.

Shinso walked into the room to pick up the pillows to see something move in the shrouded darkness in the corner of the space.

He walked over and crouched down in front of your figure, taking in your expression, how heartbroken you looked, how you shook in your position like an unbearable cold was upon you.

How you have every single problem swimming in your (e/c) eyes.

Without a word, he wraps you in his arms, feeling you finally breakdown in his hold.

"kitten, you don’t have to hide anything from me. I'll be here to support you when you need it," he said, kissing your temple.

Both of you didn't let go of each other for a while.

 Tamaki Amajiki

Tamaki had a lot to deal with, You knew that for a fact.

So you didn't bother him with your problems and insecurities much.

He was out on patrol with Fatgum and Kirishima so you decided it's finally time to let all the tears go.

You walked in front of the bathroom mirror to see your face and your body.

You felt disgusted.

Every time you saw your body, all your thoughts go to how you spill out every time you wear tight clothes, how your face would only look presentable enough when you wear cakes of makeup on your face.

How you feel like everything you do is useless, all the diets and skincare routines, gone in a blink of an eye.

Tears were streaming on your face as you glared at every single flaw you had, that maybe when you look at them, they might disappear.

Those flaws might flawlessly fix itself.

You tried to wipe your tears over and over to no avail. You didn't hear keys unlocking the front door, sun-eater going from room to room looking for you.

You hear his stuttering and worried voice getting closer and closer, making you panic.

You didn't want him to see you like this.

You closed the lights and crawl into the cold bathtub, hoping that if you fold in on yourself that maybe he wouldn't see you.

He could never be more wrong.

"s-sunflower?" Tamaki called out, his voice bouncing off the tiled bathroom.

You look overseeing his silhouette by the door.

You see his expression when he spots you, a look of concern on his features as he shuffled over to you then kneeling in front of you.

"sunflower… i-If you want to be alone, y-you can tell me… p-please tell me everything. A-all of your problems and a-all of your i-insecurities. W-we'll work o-on this t-together. Got it?" the indigo-haired boy said, shakily placing his hand on the back of your neck and pressing his forehead against yours, looking into your eyes.

A small giggle escaped your lips before nodding your head, letting the normally anxious boy pull you into a soft kiss.

 Shoto Todoroki

You couldn't breathe.

It was like something was suffocating you, crushing your chest, taking the air out of your lungs.

The darkness swirled around and around, surrounding you like fog, getting into your throat and choking you.

The fog that was stuck in your throat was making it hard to let out a sob.

It kept coming and coming, covering your vision, making sure you see pitch black until-

You woke up, jolting out of your once comfortable position, now turned an intolerable sight, seeing the sweat on the sheets.

You look over, seeing your boyfriend, Shoto sleeping soundly beside you, his hands still wrapped around your hips.

He was a pro-hero, he didn't get enough sleep as it is.

He takes the night shifts to spend more time in the morning with you but it usually backfires since he just sleeps well through the afternoon.

you negotiated with him to take the morning shifts but that didn't stop him to work well past midnight to finish everything.

This was the first night in a long while that he could finally sleep in peace.

You shouldn't wake him up because of some stupid nightmare.

You tried to gasp in some air but it was no use.

the first silent sob came out, tears flowing down your cheeks ad you tried over and over to breathe in then breathe out.

Just breathe in, breathe out

Just-

You felt a hand rubbing the small of your back, you looked beside you to see a concerned Todoroki looking over you.

Was he talking? You couldn't tell, when did your ears start ringing, you don't remember.

All you remember was him pulling you into his embrace, whispering sweet nothings in your ear.

You smiled, letting these final words drift you back to sleep.

"my love, I know you don't want to share everything, just know that I am here for you. For every sob, or every tear. I will always be here. I love you."

 This was long af but I finally got through them. Once again, tags will be very inconsistent so please bear with me! Once again, requests are open so please don't be shy to request anything! Hope these made you feel better anon! Love you guys ❤💖💕💞

[obxcunt]

Love bites || (1)

pairing: jj maybank x reader [eventually] || rafe cameron x reader [currently]

warnings: smut, death, cursing, drugs, alcohol, typos.

summary: it was supposed to be a good summer for you, the last one in the obx before going to college, the last one with your friends and family. Unfortunately, a sudden and mysterious death is about to completely change your life, pushing you directly into a brand new world and into a very sexy vampire’s arms.

A/N: i’ve been obsessed with vampires for a while, also started rewatching buffy recently. I really wanted to give you guys some vampire shit since i was in the mood for it. This is part one of my new series, let me know what you think, all characters are 18+.

masterlist || part two

“Today, we are still looking for the animal who brutally killed a teenage boy on Friday night, around midnight. The police department is asking our citizens to be extremely vigilant. A curfew might be installed for the next few days, until the end of the police’s researches—"

“Jesus…” Your mother murmured, turning off the tv. “This is scary, how are we supposed to feel safe right now?” You sighed, looking at the delicious meal in front of you, your fork wandering through it. “This thing, could be anywhere—” She paused. “Well, probably not on Figure Eight. I feel so bad for this family, maybe we should do something for them—”

“Like, what?” Your father asked, frowning. “Are you going to make them a cake with: I’m genuinely sorry about your son’s death?” He grabbed the wine, again. “Leave them alone, we already have someone to handle here.”

You rolled your eyes, taking the hint. “Alright, can you guys stop doing this?” You asked, dropping your utensils, the sounds making your mother jump. “I’m literally sitting next to you.” You father sighed, drinking and looking away. “I’m fine.”

“Well, you won't leave this goddamn house until they catched that thing.” Your father stated. “It's too dangerous.”

Your eyes widened. “Wait, what?” You laughed nervously, glancing back and forth between your parents. “You can't be serious! I— I’m not gonna stay here all summer. I have plans, with my friends and—” You turned to your mother, seeking support. “Mom, please!”

She sighed, looking down. “It's only for the nights, sweetheart.” You father groaned, focusing on his meal. “Come on, it's her last summer before going to college.”

“But, wait!” You said, realization hitting you. “I won't be able to party with my friends then—” You father laughed, pointing at you with the knife he had in hand. “That's not fair—”

“That's right, no more parties for you.” He said. “I’d love to know what you were doing on The Cut, the other night. Since when is my daughter hanging out with Pogues?” You sighed, throwing the napkin before leaving the table.“Where do you think you're going?”

“In my room!” You shouted, walking towards the door. “Is it good enough for you? It's on Figure Eight, after all.” You turned around, crossing your arms. “I’m old enough to choose my friends, aren't you tired of judging them?” He rolled his eyes, clearly not impressed. “I wasn't even hanging out with Pogues on Friday night. I was with Rafe, Topper and… Kelce.”

“Right.” He said, wiping his mouth. “Then tell me, what were you doing? If you were hanging out with them, how did you not see—”

“I already told you!” You shouted, losing your composure. “I was with Rafe, we were walking back to his car, we both wanted to leave.” Your mother sighed, drinking. “Whatever, you guys never believe me anyway.”

“Y/N…” Your mother trailed off.

“Probably because you're constantly lying and hiding things!” Your father added, and at this point you knew it was better for you to leave the room.

“I learned from the master himself.” You said, before exiting the kitchen, ignoring him. “Cheating asshole...” You murmured on your way to your bedroom.

It’s true, you were supposedly going to leave with Rafe that night, when you both left the boneyard. However, as soon as you both entered the truck: you magically ended up riding the Kook boy, under the influence.

“Shit-” He moaned, his hands slightly bruising your hips as you bounced on his dick, holding on his shoulders for dear life. “Fuck, Rafe!” You cried, bare chest pressed against his, moaning close to his ear: the sound driving him crazy. His hands moved, caressing your body, his eyes shutting down in a soft whine. You moaned loudly, head falling backwards, giving him enough space to kiss your chest. “Fuck— You feel so good, Y/N.” He said, pounding into you harder, the movement making you fall on him again. You smiled against his neck, ready to answer him before hearing a scream, the sound ruining the moment. “Wait, wait, wait—” You said, panic taking over you. You moved, your back hitting the steering wheel, making Rafe laugh. “What's wrong, Y/N?” He asked, the both of you panting as your hands moved along his toned chest. “You heard that, right?” You asked, the moonlight barely lighting his features through the fogged windows. “Well, of course.” He said, smirking. “I think everyone heard you.” You sighed, smacking his sweaty skin. “I’m serious, Rafe! Someone bloody screamed outside.” He nodded, kissing your forehead. “Relax, baby. It's probably just people messing around.” You weren't convinced by that. “Hey, i’m gonna check, okay?” He said, feeling bad as soon as you started biting your nails. You nodded, moving back to the passenger seat, putting your clothes on. “I’m coming with you.” You opened the door, quickly running to him. “I don't think it's a good—” You held his hand, shutting him off. You both walked around the deserted place, approaching the woods, searching through the darkness, the cold air and a bunch of noises giving you goosebumps. “Wait, what's that?” Rafe asked, stopping along the way to the beach, noticing a body laying on the ground. “Rafe—” You felt your heartbeat increasing, letting go of his hand. “Stay behind me, Y/N.” He said, swallowing hard and approaching it. “Holy shit.” You murmured, covering your mouth as tears emerged from the corner of your eyes, recognizing Kelce’s face, strange marks covering his neck. “Call the cops, Y/N.” Rafe murmured, panic slowly invading him as well. “Go back to the fucking car and call someone, Y/N!” He shouted, kneeling down next to his friend’s body. You walked backwards, almost tripping over something before running back to his truck. You opened the door in a rush, searching for a cellphone. “Shit—” You murmured, shaking as you composed the number. “911, what's your emergency?” A woman asked. “I— My name is Y/N/ L/N, we need an ambulance or the cops, anyone—” You paused, breathless. “Okay, slow down, can you explain to me, what's going on?” “We found a dead body, on our way to the beach, it's our friend—” You suddenly paused, hearing a noise behind you, the sound making you turn around in a silent scream, your eyes scanning the environment in panic, heart pounding against your chest. “Ma'am, are you okay? Can you hear me?” The woman asked, still waiting on the phone. “Shit, I—” You breathed in and out, trying to contain the urge to cry. “We need help, right now, please!”

You turned on the lights, entering your bedroom and closing the door behind you, laying against it in a sigh. You looked over the window, familiar sounds catching your attention: a few knocks, followed by whispers. You moved towards it, a bit anxious as you pulled up the curtains: relaxing as soon as you recognized Rafe’s face.

“What are you doing here, Rafe?” You asked, opening the window and watching the tall boy coming inside. “I’m pretty sure we still have a front door.” You added, closing it.

“You're not answering my calls or texts—” He paused, running a hand through his hair. “I was worried.”

“I’m really sorry, Rafe.” You simply replied. “I— I wasn't in the mood to talk. Things have been pretty crazy lately, especially since—” You sighed, crossing your arms. “Kelce's death and the funeral.”

“I missed you, a lot.” He admitted, surprising you. “I know we are not dating or anything but—” You looked down for a second, a bit embarrassed. “We are still friends, right? I missed my friend.” He cleared his throat, fleeing your gaze. “Anyway, we are having lunch at my house tomorrow, everyone is going to be there. It's for Kelce, do you—”

“I’ll come, of course.” You cut him off, giving him a tiny smile.

“Promise me to be careful, out there.” He said, hands cupping your cheeks. “I already lost one of my best friends.” He tried to kiss you, craving your softness but you moved, making this awkward. “Wow, okay...” He said, laughing nervously.

“Fuck, Rafe—” You sighed, rubbing your face. “I— I can't do this right now. It's too much. My parents are on my back constantly, you probably should leave before they—”

“Your parents love me, Y/N!” He said, sighing as you refused to match his enthusiasm. “Okay, it's fine. I can’t stay any longer, Topper is parked in the street, waiting for me. I just wanted to make sure you were okay.”

“That's very sweet.” You said, pushing up on your toes and kissing his cheek, the action making him blush right away. “Be careful, alright? Stay on Figure Eight, it's safer apparently.” He nodded, opening the window himself.

You watched him leave, closing the window behind him as he walked back to Topper’s jeep. Once they were gone, you looked down, noticing a silhouette standing in front of your house, the darkness hiding his identity.

“What the fuck—” You murmured, turning off the lights and shutting down the curtains. A few seconds later, you lifted the curtains a bit, (curiousty teasing you) searching for the stranger’s presence but there was nothing: they were gone.

———————————————————————

A/N: I’m so excited about this series, comment if you want to be add to the tag-list! I’ll post the next part this week!

[jaeminscoffee]

Nemesis (m.)

Nemesis- a formidable rival or opponent.

Pairing- Seo Johnny x reader

Genre- Smut.

Word count- 3.68k (these just keep getting longer)

Warnings- rough sex (is it a Lyra smut if this isn't included), edging, thigh riding, oral (m receiving), size kink, masochism, unprotected sex, begging, Johnny is cocky af. Could be more but i have no clue pfft.

Summary- From your local club, you find yourself in Johnny's bed

You hated Johnny. No, let's rephrase that. 

You hated Johnny's guts. Having him around always made you the second spotlight of the performance. Doesn't matter where, wherever Johnny goes, people swoon over him like a bunch of wasps. Granted, He's got everything a girl could ask for. Looks, attitude, sweet talks, money, body, you name it. 

You had them all too, but Johnny's popularity made you the centre of attention, that is, after him. 

You would've been fine with that if it weren't for his tauntings. He's inevitable. He's everywhere you go. 

You, till date don't know what the universe has against you, but the pair of you got accepted into the same university, the same company, even the same branch. There too, you're the second, Johnny's the ace. 

So having had to hear 'Johnny this' 'Johnny that' 'oh look Johnny's this' had you fuming by the weekend. And here, you've found yourself in the club, two of your girlfriends beside you, trying to calm your about to erupt veins. 

You felt a little free here, maybe even conceited. No Johnny, you had the spotlight. Oh and you knew it. You'd specially picked out your best club outfit, low cut v-neck, the black fabric barely reaching down your ass, tight fitting, highlighting all of your best features. 

Eyes followed every single move of your body as you vibe on the dance floor, letting loose of all previous tension. With your friends beside you, rooting for you, it was perfect. 

It was only after you'd worn yourselves out, you walk towards the bar, each sitting on one of the bar stools, ordering a drink, you hear your friend's fangirl over some guy or girl, could be any them. You down shots after shots, not paying attention to your surroundings feeling way better than you'd felt the entire week. 

"Yo, he just winked in our direction" Stella said from beside you, continuously hitting your arm as you slightly shove her to the side, "One of us is gonna get some action today and i hope it's Y/n" Lola exclaimed, wriggling her eyebrows at you. 

You give her disgusted glare, chuckling as she kept going with her eyebrows. 

"Eesh" you rasp out, feeling the alcohol start to burn your throat. "Why would you even want that" you inquire, Lola turned towards you dramatically, placing her hand on your shoulder, "Because, you look like a sad hot mess, darling. That can't do" she stated, "Agreed" Stella remarked, eyes still undressing the guy she previously mentioned, maybe even the other guys in the room.

"What? No? I look fine?" you say, more like questioning yourself. "you look fine as fuck and sad. So stop wasting yourself here and go get some" Lola retorted, patting your back and then mixing herself up with the crowd. 

"Yeah you see Y/n? I think this guy's absolutely perfect for you" Stella said, once the both of you stood up to go up to the dance floor again. "Which one?" you ask, eyeing the entire place quick, not actually caring. 

She smiled sweetly at you, turning you around, and pushing you with all the force she could muster up. 

"What the fuck-" you exclaim, feeling your body collide with someone. "-That one, babe, have fun!" she said in a singsong voice, joining Lola. 

"I'm sorry-" you look up to the body you just crashed with, feeling yourself turn solid from spite. Why does he appear every fucking where?

"Johnny." you sneered, pulling yourself out of his grip, dusting invisible lint from your dress. The lad in front of you did nothing but smirk, taking your hand in his and bringing it up to his lips, placing a soft kiss there, taking you off guard. "Y/n." he responded. 

As much as you hated him, you felt yourself drowning in his honey eyes, the party lights in the club making him look ethereal, pulling you out of your facade for a second, before you step out of it, glaring at him again. "Here alone?" he inquired. 

"None of your business" you said, comically as he'd have clearly seen you with two other girls. 

"I see, What got you here?" he further asked. 

"None of your fucking business." you hiss. Johnny let out an airy chuckle, "Aren't you in a bad mood" he asked. "Does that have anything to do with you" you ask through gritted teeth. 

"Practically, no. But I need to make sure if my runners-up is doing fine or not" he said, double tapping your cheeks with his palm. You felt the coldness you previously had melt down, replacing it with nothing more than pure hatred and annoyance. 

"Fuck you, Seo." you reply in a tight voice. "Oh, she's getting annoyed, isn't she?" he said, voice teasing clearly trying to get up your nerves. 

"No." you retort, turning back wanting nothing but to leave the room in order to not breathe the same air as Johnny. "Really, doll?" Johnny asked, bending down to look at you straight in the eye. It felt intriguing, you were drawn to his gaze, trying to break out but to no avail. You look away, clearing your throat, looking back at him. "Yes." you say. Johnny walked closer, "Say.. Does my presence annoy you?" he inquired, obviously knowing the answer, "Yes.." You said, lowly due to the proximity. 

"Then why aren't you walking away?" he asked, you let out a sigh, knowing even if you want to walk away, your friends won't take that well. "Because I can't," you reply, gesturing at your two friends standing still, watching your exchange of words. He looked at them, then back at you with a smirk on his face. 

"I see. That's good. Because I've been dying to tell you this one thing" he moved closer, pushing your hair back, pulling you close by the waist, leaning into your ears, 

"I've got this strong urge to rip that dress and fuck your attitude out of you." 

-x-

That's how after a 10 minute ride, you find yourself, flat against Johnny's wall, hands on either side of your face as the lad didn't fail to explore even one corner of your mouth. 

Maybe it was the alcohol in your system, he looked extremely appealing. That sentence he'd spoken had gotten you all weak in the knees, palms flat against his chest, as you immediately pressed your lips against his at the club. 

This was another thing you hated about him. He's just so fucking fine not even incubus or other sex gods could say no to anything he says. 

You try breaking away from his grip on your hands, wanting desperately to touch him, feel him. 

"Stop squirming." he said sternly, breaking the intense kiss having a string of saliva connect the lips still. His eyes roaming all over your body, technically eye fucking you. 

"Then let me fucking go" you roared, chest heaving from the previous make out, breathing in the air containing his manly musk. Johnny's head made his way towards the side of your face, nuzzling on the flesh before retorting to your earlobe, nibbling on it, you hear him hum. "Hm, why should i do that, doll?" his voice deep. 

"Do you need a fucking reason to let me go?" you ask, rubbing your thighs together, his height making you feel extremely small, turning you on incredibly. 

"If you want the dick better watch your attitude baby, i don't like brats." he replied, biting down on the skin of your neck, making you hiss slightly. 

"Does it seem like i care-ah!" you yelp, feeling yourself get lifted off the floor, you look at him. 

"Behave." he said slow, having the freedom of moving your hands now you immediately pulled his head closer to yours, locking his lips with yours, biting down on his bottom lips. 

He broke away first. Looking at you with nothing but shock and lust. 

"I get what i want, Seo. You don't tell me to behave" you remark, a smirk evident on your face. You hear him let out a chuckle as you felt yourself being thrown down onto the bed. "Not with me baby, you behave, you get what you want. Act like a fucking brat i won't hesitate to put you in your place." his eyes had gone dark, voice dangerously low.��

Johnny made his way towards the bed, shirt already disposed along with his black denim jacket, he eyed your spread our body, admiring each and every curve as you gawk at his toned middle, chest chiselled adding onto why Johnny Seo is oh so perfect. The anger you felt, turning into pure lust, desire of wanting nothing more than for him to ruin you. 

"Behave you say, well you're in for a long ride, Seo. I don't like behaving" you taunt, sending a wink in his direction, moving back the bed as he crawled forward towards you. 

His demeanor was intimidating as he stared down at you with his cold eyes catching your ankle stopping you from crawling further up.

"I shouldn't even give you anything with that attitude of yours, baby." he said, pulling his body over yours, placing hands on either sides of your face, weighing his body down in order to not crush your bones.

"You're saying that cause you know you can't satisfy my needs. Poor baby boy," you feign empathy, running the back of your fingers down his face slowly, feeling his jaws clench.

With one pull, he had himself seated towards the edge of the bed, with you on the floor in front of him, seated between his legs, looking down at the floor as you try calming yourself from the sudden movement.

You felt hands grip your hair, pulling it back, forcing you to look up into his eyes. They were now void of any emotion. It scared you the slightest, but you didn't show it.

"When i said behave. You should've fucking listened, brat." he said, voice dripping venom, making your clench your thighs together, the feeling of vulnerability and how small you felt, made you needier than intended. 

His grip on your hair wasn't soft, your roots felt like they'd detach any second, but you enjoyed every second of the pain. 

You open your mouth to make another cocky retort, when the force of the tug intensified. "Better shut your little mouth and put it for another use." he said, pulling you in closer, his pants discarded behind you as the red angry shaft his toned stomach, the red tip dripping precum making your mouth water, the knot in your lower abdomen tightening.

He looked at you with a demanding look, eyes narrowed as you look up at him, eyes basically begging. 

"Suck." is all it took, and you pounce at his member, earning a throaty groan from Johnny. You start at the tip, licking the slit, clearing of all the white substance there, then slowly wrapping your lips around the head, sucking in gently, wanting to tease him as much as possible. 

Johnny rested both his hands on your head, pulling the hair back in a makeshift ponytail, trying to push your head further down.

"Stop teasing or you'll j-just make it worse for yourse-fuck.." he couldn't complete his sentence as you lower down completely, almost till the base, before pulling away feeling the head hit the back of your throat, activating your gag reflex. 

Not letting you pull away fully, he pushed you back down, mouth open ajar, hitting your throat again, resulting in tears forming in your eyes. 

You bop your head up and down, "That's right baby, uh-" he inhaled sharply as you hollow your cheeks, sucking in too hard. 

You kept moving your head up and down, Johnny setting the pace with his hands still on your hair. You feel your jaws starting to hurt, neck starting to cramp a bit so you move your head faster, desperate to get him to his orgasm. But he had other plans. 

You reach out between his thighs, still sucking and licking on the shaft, hands palming his palms, causing him to jerk his hips forward. 

"Fuck Y/n stop" he tapped your cheeks as he felt his high approaching, but you didn't stop, rather you started bopping your heas faster, with more aggression.

"Ah! s-stop" he said, growing sensitive having his orgasm just by the doorstep. 

Seconds before reaching his high, he tore you away from his dick with a sharp pull, causing you to hiss in pain, and whine in desperation of wanting to taste him. 

You sat there still, wiping your mouth as drool had managed to escape amidst the blowjob while Johnny sat by the bed, looking at the floor trying to catch his breath. 

Once calm and normal, he looked up at you, eyes burning with anger and lust. 

He got up from the bed, while you stayed seated on the floor, making his way towards you with slow, agonizing steps.

"When i say stop.." he took a step forward, the anger in his eyes scaring you completely, making you crawl back. 

"You stop." he took another step forward, you moving backwards. 

"Then tell me. Why didn't you." he bellowed.

You stop your chest from heaving that fast, as he keeps moving forward, you soon find your back hit the wall, nowhere else to escape. 

"Because i didn't want to" you rasp out. 

Johnny took one large step forward, bending down, wrapping his fingers around your throat, standing up, pulling you by your neck, causing you to stand up along with him. 

"You are such a fucking brat.." he rasped out through grit teeth, jaw tense. 

He tightened the grip, moving closer as his figure towered yours, "You look so small, yet you have that attitude. Fucking respectable" he roared pulling you along and throwing you onto the bed the second time. You let out the breath you didn't know you holding in, eyes shut tight, opening once you regained the oxygen he'd cut off a few seconds away. 

Johnny moved up to you, pulling your body towards the edge, ripping your dress off your body, the material of your panties being ripped into two too, as you moan silently at his sudden aggression.

"You're so fucking wet, just like a good little slut. But nope she has to have a fucking attitude" he said, shoving two fingers straight into your core without a warning, causing you to scream. Your juices splattered around from the movement of his fingers, squelching noises produced by how wet you are as Johnny showed no signs in slowing down. 

"John oh!" you moan out. 

His fingers were knuckle deep inside you, curling and pumping in again, brushing the soft spot. You jerk forward, hips moving along his fingers as he pressed the pad of his thumb onto your clit, driving you closer towards the edge. "Mm fuck.. " your voice small, feeling yourself clench around his fingers at the thought of being completely in his mercy. And oh is he merciless. 

"Oh? You seem close, right, pretty doll?" he questioned. You were unable to answer as his fingers moved faster and faster, not able to form a comprehend able sentence only letting out lewd noises. 

His free hand came flat down on your clit, causing you to jerk forward, "Fucking answer me." he resumed playing with your clit. Your knuckles turned white from how hard you were gripping the sheets. "y-yes, i..oh fuck.. I am!" your face contort out of pleasure, feeling the orgasm just two steps away, immediately fading away as Johnny removed his fingers from in you. 

"Come on!" you cry out, feeling your high go further and further away. 

"Hm? What happened baby?" he said, face portraying fake sympathy. 

"Johnny, I was so close!" you let out a sob, unknown to the fact that tears had started falling. You hear him let out laugh, "Yeah you made that clear, didn't know your pussy that strong" he replied, removing the last piece of clothing article from your body, both of your bodies covered in sweat, glistening the light reflecting from the window. 

"Johnny.. Please" you desperately try voicing out, wanting nothing more than a release. "oh she can beg! Pleasant surprise" he marveled. "Say, will you behave?" he asked, eyes narrowed looking at you as you let out a chain of sobs. 

"No if you can't make me fucking cum-" you scream out before being able to complete the sentence, his fingers shoved back into you. 

You were sensitive, shitless, your walls hurt and your orgasm denial was still fresh. "So being treated as a slut it is." he grunted, moving his fingers in an inhumanly pace, his other hand over your waist, holding you down flat onto the sheets as you grip that hand in a tight hold. 

"Oh fuck.." your breathing fastened, feeling the previous orgasm come back to life. 

"you look so fucking good, so small, so desperate for me" Johnny added pressure back onto your clit, rubbing fast circles. 

"Ah!" you yelp when you feel him add a third fingering, curling and twisting inside of you, as you feel yourself reaching your high. You let a cry, orgasm almost there, but one last shove and he removed his finger, leaving your core desperate and pulsating. 

"Johnny please!" you cry out louder, tears pouring down your cheeks faster as you grip onto his hands. He looked at you with a smirk on his face. 

"Want to cum?" he asked, shoving his fingers into his mouth, licking your juices off of it. 

"Yes! Oh yes please!" you reply, nodding your head frantically. 

Johnny acted as though he was thinking for a while, "Well.." he started. 

"You gotta work for it babe" he placed a kiss on the inside of your thigh. "So. Be a good little girl and beg for my dick." he said, seeing you all fucked up, hair all over the place, lipstick smudge, tears running down your face and so small, vulnerable yet you looked gorgeous. 

Now you see, all the rationality you'd previously had was all thrown out the window. You wanted the release. You needed that release. 

"Please, please fuck me Johnny, i promise I'll be a good girl! Just.. Please put your dick inside me, I swear I feel good!" you cry out, spreading your legs further open, as he sees your core glistening. Johnny let out a low growl, wasting not a second, holding you by your hip as you aligned himself by your entrance, the tip poking in. 

He looked at you, seeing you stare back at him, and kept his eyes on you as he pushed in all the way, watching your face contort out of pleasure and maybe the slightest mix of pain. 

"You're fucking right, princess-" he started, pulling his member out completely, before shoving it in, you scream, extremely sensitive but nothing you couldn't take.

"You feel extremely good. So fucking tight" his pace was fast, hips steady, no signs of it going sloppy anytime soon. Your orgasm was fast approaching, the build up begging you for it to be released, he pushed in further, leaning down and capturing your lips in a slow kiss in contrast to the pace of his hips. 

"Joh-n.. I'm g-gonna.. fuck!" you couldn't complete the sentence yet the message was delivered. "Let go baby, it's fine" he said, going faster, rubbing circles onto your clit to encourage your orgasm. 

You cum with a loud moan, clenching around him, trying to shut your legs close from the intensity of the orgasm, but his legs in between stopped you from doing that. 

Johnny slowed down for a movement to help you calm a bit but not stopping completely. Growing impatient as you take your own sweet time to calm down, he gripped your thigh from the bottom, lifting it up to let your leg dangle off his shoulder.

He started fast again, your clenching pulling him closer and closer towards the edge.

You pant heavily, "Johnny i can't.." sensitive from all the edging and the high that not even a second ago. Causing a faint pain in your core, getting you all worked up ready for your second orgasm again. 

Oh how you were a sucker for pain. 

"Yes you can. And you will" he said, going deeper, slowed to feel each and every inch of your inside, feeling you clench around him again. 

"Shit.." Johnny rasped out, feeling his high approaching from your constant pressure on his member.

He went faster, the only sounds in the room being those inhuman sounds coming from both of you, skin slapping and the sound of your wet core being pounded at. 

"Johnny!" your voice wobbly from all the cries and moans, clenching around him faster wanting him to cum faster and get this over with. 

"Fuck baby, scream my name again, I'm so, so close" his voice cracked, hips stuttering, but shoved into you powerfully once again. 

"Johnny, ah!" your feeble voice screaming, your small cunt taking him this well, and your constant clenching pulled his last string. 

You felt him twitch inside of you, then seconds later his seeds coated the walls of your core, driving you to your second orgasm, as Johnny rode the two of you out of your high with his deep voice letting out gasps and groans. 

Johnny flopped down beside you panting from the action, the room smelled of sex. 

After a while of quietness filling the air, Johnny broke it first. 

"Well that was.. Something" his voice was more raspy than ever, as you gulp down the dryness from your throat. 

"Yeah.." you reply tiredly.

"Want to go for a second round and see who lasts longer this time?" Johnny let out jokingly with no actual intention of doing so. 

You turn to your side with a little bit of struggling, wrapping your hands around his torso as you pull your body closer to his.

"Just shut the fuck up and cuddle me"

[bi-snape]

Chapter 4

Chapter Characters: Severus Snape, Female OC, Evan Rosier, James Potter, Sirius Black, and Lily Evans

Severus's mind filled with voices, so many that it was hard to tell what they were saying. He's dealt with these voices before, they normally speak to him one by one but sometimes they all start speaking at once and it causes him such great stress. These voices always tell him the same thing to give in to the darkness, to end it all but he never listens to them cause Lily is always there for him, she makes the voices go away simply by being near.

Tho she isn't the only person who could keep the voices away by being in his presence, no there was another person who could rid the voices from within his head. "Severus" well speak of the devil and he shall appear. Severus looked up tears streaming down his face, the voices that had filled his mind completely vanished at the sound of his savior's voice. "Evan" Sev said softly and quickly stood up "You came" he added as he practically threw himself into Evan's arms. Evan wrapped his arms around Severus and smiled "Of course I did, you said you needed help" he spoke softly. Severus's mind was at a complete blank, he had forgotten everything that had happened minutes before Evan had arrived. Sev always seemed to forget about his panic attacks when either Evan or Lily showed up, for some reason they both made him forget about everything that happened before their arrival.

"Oh yeah" He said quietly and removed himself from Evan. "So is everything alright?" Evan asked as he was still concerned about his friend, Severus smiled "Yup, I had what Lily calls a panic attack but it's fine now. Oh I got a surprise! Come Come!" He said excitedly and practically ran inside the house. Evan followed him inside all his worries having faded away the minute Severus smiled. The pair headed to Severus's room where a certain little girl was sleeping in. Once they reached their destination Severus slowly opened his bedroom door and quietly stepped inside, Evan followed suit and slowly entered the room "So what exactly is the surprise?" He asked in a whisper sensing that it be wise to not make a sound. Severus walked towards his bed and smiled "I have a little girl!" He shouted out in a whisper excitedly as he pointed at the little girl who was fast asleep.

Evan stared at the girl in complete shock "How the hell did you get a kid?" He questioned. "One night stand" Severus said quickly, Evan knew for a fact that that was a lie. The girl looked nothing like Severus and as far as he was concerned Sev never had any interest in any sexual activities. Sev always told him that sex was a waste of time and that he never saw the appeal in it anyways, later in their friendship Severus had declared he was asexual something that Regulus had brought up during conversation. Severus had also declared he was aromantic the very next day after he had spoken to Lily, now he was trying to figure out why his friend would lie about having sexual relations with a random woman. If Severus ever had to sleep with a girl Evan was certain Sev would sleep with Lily or her Sister, tho Severus and Petunia aren't exactly friends but they're civil to one another. Evan can tell that the little girl looked nothing like the Evans sisters, and the idea of Severus getting drunk and having a fling was out of the question. Severus never felt comfortable with drinking anywhere except within his own home and only drank when he was alone, on some occasions he'll drink with friends but he'll never drink any hard liquor.

"So did this chick just leave her in front of your house?" Evan asked, he wanted to know how Severus really obtained the girl but he knew Severus would never tell him. "Her mom died, she wrote in her will that I would gain custody so the cops brought her here" Severus said, he knew Evan wasn't believing a single word he was saying and to be fair he didn't care. The only reason he was saying such obvious lies is because Evan has no clue that he's Nevermore and he wasn't going to tell him anytime soon. "What's her name?" Evan asked, his mind still trying to figure out why Severus had this girl in the first place "Her name is Clair, tho I might get it changed I haven't decided yet" Severus said happily "I know you don't believe me but that's the story you're gonna tell people when they ask why I have a kid, okay" He added as he turned to look at Evan. "Okay" was all Evan said, he had a hard time saying no to Severus when staring into his eyes.

"So what is it that you need?" Evan asked "Everything that declares her as mine" Severus said in a serious tone. Evan nodded and the minute he did so there was banging on the front door that caused Severus to flinch violently "Oh god I'm gonna die" Sev said quickly and carefully picked up Clair and ran into the bathroom "Make them go away" He said as he locked the bathroom door. Evan shook his head and exited out of the room making his way towards the front door. The banging on the door continued which seemed to make Evan angry, he grabbed the door handle and forcefully opened the door "What!!" He shouted out angrily. "Where is he?" James said with just as much anger "I'm not telling you a damn thing until you calm down" Evan said as he crossed his arms. James sighed heavily and forced himself to relax "Where's Severus?" He asked as calmly as possible "Upstairs in his room in the bathroom, you got ten minutes to talk before I kick you out" Evan said as he stepped aside to let James in.

"Alright" James said as he stepped inside and made his way to Severus's room. Once there He stepped inside and looked around "Severus we need to talk" He said loud enough for him to hear but not enough to startle him. James heard movement and the bathroom door swung open "Hi Jamie" Severus said cheerfully as ever "What brings you here?" He asked jokingly. "Where's the kid Severus?" James said in a tired voice "What kid?" Severus questioned which caused James to groan. "The little girl Severus, you took her after you killed her parents and then you sent me a picture with the caption Fuck the Police" James said quickly "Hehe that was funny, she's in the bathroom I was giving her a bath because I forgot why I ran in there. Imma keep her and name her Yulia" Severus said excitedly while giggling softly.

"You can't keep her!" James shouted out "But I wanna have a kid!! I want her to be my kid!!" Severus shouted out with tears forming in his eyes "She needs to go to an orphanage Sev, you can adopt her later" James said hoping to keep Severus from crying, last time he made Sev cry Lily was practically poisoning him when he was in the hospital after being shot by a thief. Luckily Severus forgot about the incident and was confused as to why Lily was killing him so she stopped. "But I already have her!!" James watched as tears fell from Severus's eyes and before he could say anything to calm him down he felt a dark presence behind him. James slowly turned and came face to face with a very angry Lily "Hey Lily" he said slowly as his body filled with fear "L-Lily" Severus said sadly as he cried softly.

Lily glared at James and rushed over to her best friend "Hush now Sev" She said softly as she hugged Severus. Her attention soon returned to James "I think it's time for you to go" She said and snapped her fingers. James gulped unsure of what was gonna happen next but that was soon answered when he felt someone grab hold of him and drag him out of the house harshly. He felt himself get thrown out the front door and land on the cold hard pavement "So this is you handling the situation" James looked up to see Sirius smirking. "Shut up" James said as he stood up and dusted himself off "Dude you are terrible at talking to Severus, seriously you'd think you learn how to keep him from crying after last time" Sirius said while laughing.

"He won't give up the girl, says he wants to keep her but when I told him that he could adopt her he said no cause he already had her" James said softly "He really wants a kid huh, sucks that it won't be her" Sirius stated

"What do you mean it won't be her?"

"James we found out the girl's has a Aunt who lives in America, once we get her back that's where she's going. Severus won't see her again" Sirius said softly which caused James to sigh deeply "There's no way that Severus will give her up. What do we do now?" James spoke as he turned to look at Severus's home. "We let him keep her and fake the girl's death, I know someone who can help" Sirius said excitedly "So help me god if you call your brother for help I will-" James started but was interrupted "End me uh huh sure, don't get pissy cause my brother dumped you for someone better now come on let's go home and figure out how to keep Lily from poisoning you again" Sirius stated and grabbed hold of James before making his way back to their home. James sighed and allowed his best friend to drag him back home hoping for the day to end.

[birbyisbunin]

Day one of @kiramochii 's Pinktober prompt list (demon/yokai)

Demon Dabi x reader

Life is hard. It's always this way nothing seems to be better or easier, you always try to convince yourself that it will be ok, everything will get better but it just get worst.

Today was no difference you are forced to leave your apartment by the owner of the block cause you can't keep paying the rent when that jerk keep doubling it.

Your salary wasn't too much you worked as a waiteress in a café and now you're leaving to a new apartment for the seventh time this year.

But the rent was really low which was good for you but made you a little worried cause this one is actually bigger and nicer why is the rent cheaper plus you were the only one that lived in this block.

But you threw this thoughts aside cause you don't have another option anyway.

You entered your new home it was super clean which was strange cause no one had lived here for like 3 years but you thought maybe the owner is nice and he cleaned it for you.

And hell you were wrong, you spent the day exploring your new home and put your stuff in the wardrobe and shelves.

It's 12 am now you didn't notice that you passed your sleep time, you went to the bathroom to prepare yourself for sleeping.

After finishing your before bed rituals you entered your in your comfy sleep clothes when you were met with a figure sitting on your bed looking at you "hey there doll" the Demon like creature said with a chill smile as if you know each other since your birth.

You screamed your lungs throwing your phone at him and any thing was beside you he dodged all of them say "hey this is dangerous is this how humans treat their roommates" which made you even more scared now you are running towards the exit of the room and to the front door.

But as you turned to the exit of the room he suddenly appeared in front of you still smiling and their was some smoke around him.

You fell on the floor from the surprise unable to move from the fear that rode you praying that your death won't be so painful.

You have gave up looking at your killer who is kinda confused before shutting your eyes waiting for your death, at least you will be killed by a really hot and handsome demon.

You waiting for so long it was only a minute but felt like hour, then you finally opened your eyes again to meet the sight if that demon like creature now sitting on the floor infront of you kinda examine your features 'oh great this is exactly what I need a pervert demon' you thought to your self.

"Aren't you gonna kill me or what?" You said in a scared but joking tone which made him a little surprised by your question.

"What?? Why would I do that?" He replied with yet another question "because you are a demon and I assume I stepped in your house and now you want to kill me?".

He starts laughing really hard at your respond which made you pout and frown a little "hey!! It doesn't matter if you are a demon or not or if I scared you don't have the right to laugh at me like this plus I didn't say anything funny".

"Hahaha sorry I didn't mean to but couldn't hold it inside though" he said "and you don't need to be scared I won't hurt you I don't actually hurt humans at all if they don't mess with me plus it will be a waste to hurt a beauty like you" you slightly blushed at this which made him smirk.

"Hi I am Dabi the blue flame demon" he said standing up and offering you a hand to help you stand up as well.

You took his hand and stood looking at his unfamiliar features, his black horns, the black demon tail and some small wings at his back he looked so hot like how can a demon look this hot.

"Mmm my name is y/n nice to meet you" you said, "I am really sorry if I bothered you by moving in in your home I just had no idea you live here" you continued.

He chuckled and said "no problem it was boring living alone here anyway I think I will be nice to have someone around everytime someone moves in here once I appears say run and scream and I don't blame them I a demon after all and a scary looking one too" you looked away from him a little embarrassed from what you did earlier "sorry for doing the same earlier I was just surprised to see someone in my room it doesn't do anything with you being a demon I would have done the same if it was a human too" you said with an awkward smile "plus you look really fine actually you look really handsome Dabi" you added with the same smile.

He smiled "so you don't mind living here even though you know now I live here?" He said, you stood silent for a while don't know what to do you don't want to make him sad if you say no all fear from earlier disappear only worried that refusing will make him sad probably but like at the same time it's hard to say yes cause you are hell sure it will be a really spooky life and your life didn't need to get any spookier, finally after few minutes you gave your answer.

"No"

"I don't mind living here with you"

You said surprised with yourself, he also looked surprised by your answer "you know that I won't hurt you if you say no right?" He said making sure your decision wasn't taken based on your fear.

"I am sure of my decision I want to stay here plus not like I actually have a place to ho anyway" you said.

He smiled and as he smiled suddenly you felt something warm on your shoulder and blue light from it.

When the light and warmth disappeared you looked at your shoulder to find a blue flame tattoo on it, then you looked at Dabi confused.

"You are a kind person you are the only human that accepted me and as a return I am now all yours anything you want will happen once you ask I am now your servant" he said bowing to you.

Now you're more confused like what I have a demon servant now and you cringed actually at the word servant.

"Ah um can I just be your human friend or partner or anything I just don't like the servant and master term" you said laughing awkwardly which made Dabi smile softly.

"Yes we can"

*time skip*

Now after two months living with your new friend life is a lot easier and brighter you don't go to work cause Dabi can make money, you have a new friend that is the greatest friend you had ever had and you kinda had a crush on him too but this is another story.

Who thought that because of that greedy bustard you used to live in an apartment he owned, that you would have now such a great life that you almost wants to thank that man for your magical life you're having with Dabi.

You are happy that you waited and been patient it was all worth it.

[guigz1-coldwar]

'Both alike': New chapter for "Redemption in a Spirit in a Cold War" is out !

'Both alike'

Chapter Summary : Yirina woke up from her night after reliving an troubling memory....and an talk is necessary with someone....

To read it on AO3, click here !

Words : +3500

------------------------------------------------------------------

It was since an long time that I didn't feel myself like that and it was quite troubling for me to reface that again....last time I was like that was when I first try to contact Freya herself in the New Orleans and since, I was mainly able to concentrate myself on not doing that again even with the most painful moments that I had to live : seeing Freya again in that mall, calling her back and also seeing Zasha back and learning of what happened to them in 3 years. I was strong but it only needed an picture of Perseus, an memory of the safehouse and Adler himself to make me prove wrong.

I did face an fear of needles towards me and everytime I see an needle that is intented to get to me, I see Adler again, injecting right into the left eye socket while I was on that stretcher, surrounded and unable to move as it was doing nothing to help my state. Adler is an unforgivable man and seriously, there's not an simple way for me to pardon for what he has done against a lot of people. He could say that he did this because of the 'sake of the national security and the Free World' but it will never help him for good, making only things bad.

After everyone left except Zasha & Park, I start to fell asleep a few minutes later, slowly closing my eyes on that couch as the two were staying next to me, trying to recomfort me by an lot and their presence with me was only making me good despite my whole damn state right now. I'm just an woman is trying to discover about herself in the middle of an secret war, having tides to the both sides and just wanting to live normally....Am I going to live that for real ?

As I opened my eyes, I could see myself....laid down in an flying american cargo plane and I wasn't feeling so well....3 bullets were in me at my chest level and I was still hooded.....this day, it was the day that Adler found me on that airstrip and I was transported somewhere but I couldn't know where exactly....maybe to an CIA facility or....I couldn't know and I don't want to know in fact.

I was laid on the ground, seeing two mens standing up just next to me both talking to each other....Russell Adler himself wearing an green jacket and a cap and the other....he was more looking like an american military doctor. I couldn't hear at the beginning but as I slowly regain consciousness of the situation, I could hear them well.

"So, what are we going to do with her ?" The doctor asked, his arms crossed, looking at Adler very curious.

"We're gonna bring her back for interrogation." Adler replied before he moved his head around to look at Mason & Woods from afar, the two sleeping deeply. "For everyone else, she's declared dead." He added, looking back at the doctor who was confused.

"What do you mean ?" The doctor de-crossed his arms, raising an eyebrow to Adler.

"You heard me right, soldier." Adler was sounding annoyed like if the doctor should have already know of what he was talking about. "No one need to know here that this russian girl has survived."

"And why that ?" The doctor demanded again.

"Listen...." Adler started, pointing at me & him, looking dead serious and not wanting to awake the two. "Perseus agents aren't so willing to give an word to us and....this one.....I'm not sure if she's gonna talk for real."

"So ?"

"This means that maybe normals means of interrogation aren't going to work with her." Adler seemed pretty sure of his word before looking around again. "We're still going to do them but if the others asked.....tell them that she died of her wounds." He exclaimed as I could feel myself moving my hand very slowly.

"Help....help me...." I whispered in an very low voice as it was muffled by the hood I still have on my head, raising my hand towards Adler as the two realized that I was awake....until Adler quickly moved his left hand right in front of my mouth, avoiding me to speak again.

"Shut up !" He ordered, sounding low and holding my mouth as I could feel my eyes crying by an lot from that, never that I was scared by the man himself. "If you tell one more word here, you really gonna die." He affirmed before he look back at the doctor. "Give her enough anaesthetic drug to make her sleep again."

"But, sir...." The doctor tried to start before he could see Adler looking back at him, angry.

"That wasn't an suggestion, that's an order !" He admitted as he was still holding me before the doctor took a deep breath, taking out an syringue and checking if it was full.

"It....it should be enough for an long sleep." The doctor snorted as he got next to me, kneeling before he injected me with the needle right into my left arm as Adler was forcing me to not move with me, crying out with my eyes as I couldn't speak an word.

"Good girl." Adler smirked as I could start to feel the anaesthetic taking over me as I start to slow close my eyes, still seeing Adler smirking as the doctor start to walk away, not looking behind him, maybe feeling guilty and leaving me alone with Adler on top of me.....

"You're going to be an wonderful asset !"

This memory, it kinda make me believe that Adler never actually see me as an human being but more like an fucking tool....an asset. His said 'forgiveness' towards me, the excuses he was making to me, to Park and everyone, I'm pretty sure it's the damn bullshit coming from his mouth like always. I did see it when he wanted to apologize to me about what he has done but I didn't see it when he apologized for his bad words towards my relationship with Park. This memory.....and many others like this one....is making me open my eyes fully.

After hours of struggling in my sleep, fighting to not say to myself that I'm not an 'asset', I awoke slowly, back into that couch where Park & Zasha brought me in. I was still kinda feeling not good even if that feeling was very minimal like if I was still facing that memory in my head. When my eyes were fully open, I looked around to see the main room almost empty with only Zasha at the desk we were using.

I started to slowly move in the couch, redressing myself to get sit on it before I took an deep breath once I was fully sit, getting my hands on my face, wanting to see if I was still kinda dizzy and it was better than I thought to be honest. I passed my hands quickly in my hair & face before I took an look at Zasha, working.

"How's work, Zed ?" I exclaimed in an funny tone with me trying to raise my voice as it wasn't sounding so well right now as I just woke up.

"My god !" Zasha almost jumpscared from their seat at hearing my voice before putting their right hand above their heart, at the verge of having an cardiac arrest because of me. "Yirina." They breathed as they move from their seat to walk to me. "You're alright ?" They asked me, putting their hands on top of mine.

"Yeah, it's better than last night." I grinned at them, joining our hands together before I look around again. "Where's everyone ?"

"Well, they all left for one of their missions in the city, they took Greta & Garrett in." They replied, making the same as me, more focused on the dashboard. "It's only, me, Park....and also Mason too in here."

"Oh...he...he didn't go with them ?" I demanded, knowing that Mason wasn't so good when he saw me like that yesterday. They shook their head.

"No, his friend Woods said that it was better that he stay here to rest." They added.

"And where's Park ?" I asked.

"She's just in the kitchen, taking an coffee....we're after noon." They responded, making me an bit relieved but also stunned to learn that I slept for an long, long time since I remembered to have start sleeping at 11 PM....almost more than 13 hours of sleep. "It's good to see you well, Yirina." They added, making an smile to me as I start to remember of something.

"Zasha...I did remember of something." I started, getting their attention on me as we were having our both hands together. "You said...the day Dedov left that....you had feelings for me...." I looked at them who was an bit embarassed about it....seeing them blushing. "Was....was it true ?" I could remember well what they have said to me that day and seeing our hands together make me relive that memory in an flash.

"Yeah...." They snorted, sounding very low, looking away from me. "I was until Portnova arrived in my life." They continued as I could see an tear on their left eye before they move their hand to clean it. "I....shit..."

"Hey, it's okay, Zed." I affirmed as I make them look at me with an smile. "It's just that I wanted to know but I didn't want to trouble you in case with that." I said before I slowly got up from my couch to hug them as an recomfortive way. "I'm your friend and I will do my best to get Portnova back to you." I affirmed, feeling Zasha's hands on my back.

"We will.." Zasha whispered, sounding an bit sad before we withdraw from each other, making an little tap on their shoulder before taking an breath.

"So....to change....how's work ?" I repeated my very first question to them, keeping my hand on their shoulder.

"With Park, we were able to track down the usual routine of Lukas Ritter and maybe found an way to make them talk about getting to Portnova." They fully replied with an smile, moving away to get back at our desk, walking with them to it. "We are maybe going to move on him tonight as we know of his trips in the city."

"It's like trying to know if these 'differents opinions' are real." I suggested, referring to what we have seen in those transmissions last night and they nodded. "Listen, I'm gonna go see Park, take something to eat and then, we're coming back to work." I added as I start to walk away slowly.

"Sounds good for me." They exclaimed, getting sit on their chair to work.

"And don't drink too much coffee." I scoffed, stopping myself to point at them.

"Doesn't sound right, then." They said before they laugh and me too as I start to walk again to the kitchen's direction.

I was feeling good despite still having an sort of headache in me, having this particular memory in me...seeing Adler holding my mouth to control me....like he did after that...I need to break that control but I don't know how exactly I can do it. I tried to stop to think about it as I was getting inside the kitchen that was already open before I could see Park standing up next to the fridge in her thoughts and without an word, I moved to get next to her, to hug her exactly.

"Oh, Yiri..." She started surprised, breaking away from her thoughts as I was hugging her with my arms before she moved her arms around me too. "You surprised me." She sounded happy nonetheless that I was awake

"Yeah, I know, I'm sorry." I whispered, apologizing from doing that to her even if she was okay with it.

"How do you feel ?" She asked me as we broke the hug, just facing each other.

"Well, I'm feeling good but bad thoughts...." I began with, trying to look away before I leaned on the counter just next to her, crossing my arms. "I just remember the day where Adler transported me to get to an CIA facility somewhere....the day I was left for dead." I looked at Park who was worried and curious to know more.

"What did you see ?" She questioned me as she put her hands on mine, feeling her touch on me.

"Adler....ordering someone by force to tell the other that I was dead for unknow reasons...seeing him controlling me like I was nothing to him....at all." I fully replied, holding back my own tears to not think of myself been nothing....just an asset. "That's why Woods & Mason were never aware of me..." I suggested as the two were unaware of my brainwashing at that time...I could still see their reactions when they learned about it.

"Yes." Park breathed, sad to rethink about it as she got next to me, very close as we joined hands together. "It was so painful to me to keep your state secret to Woods & Mason at that time but with Mason's history & Adler's threats, I couldn't." She sniffed as she put her head on my shoulder. I was holding back my own tears to see her like that.

"But now, they know and...." I started before I cut myself in my own voice, feeling myself bad in an sudden, finding myself at Park's place and feeling her own pain. "Mason..." I whispered like that.

"When he learned about it, he's refacing his old history." Park explained as I moved my hands behind her shoulder, looking in front of me, blank stare. "There's moments where he's reliving what the CIA did to him when they interrogate him." She snorted, her hands touching my chest and her head still on my shoulder. "He's been thinking about you since you left with me....he told me that 2 hours ago."

"Really ?" She moved her head on my shoulder, meaning an yes according to her moves. "Do you think I should go talk with him ?" I proposed before Park move to face me, not sure of it according to her face.

"I don't know but it could maybe help you." She responded, taking my hands in hers again. "If it can help you feel better, so do it. I'm with you in both ways." She affirmed, making me grin an little.

"Yes but I think I need to take it easy, you know ?" I suggested and she nodded as it was her own words that I was saying back.

"Listen, maybe you can go to him now ?" She proposed, pulling me for an very quick kiss on the lips, just to give me hope & recomfort. "I'm going to prepare something for you once you're finished with him."

"Sounds good." I said with an smile, making also an quick kiss on her lips before I start to walk away from the kitchen, leaving Park alone in it.

Honestly, talking with Mason himself was giving stress because even if the two of us shared the same state during an part of our life, I wasn't going to talk to him, already knowing everything about him and like if it was normal. It's been years Mason faced that situation and he's been fighting for years to get things right and to forget what happened to him but with me here and what I suffered because of Adler, his old memories....his bad thoughts has popped up again in his life.

When I arrived in front of Mason's room, I took an deep breath before actually starting to knock on the door and to be honest, I wasn't sure if Mason was going to allow me to enter or to even acknowledge me now as he wasn't going well these days.

"Come in." I could hear him through the door, his voice muffled because of it and I was trembling before I put my hand on the door handle, slowly opening it to discover Mason sitting on the edge of his bed, looking blank stare at the wall before he looked at me. "Oh, it's you." He said in an low voice.

"I...I wanted to know how you were now ?" I asked, sounding troubled as I close the door behind me, sweating at the idea to know more about Mason.

"Right now ?" They repeated, still with the same voice. "It's always bad thoughts coming back." He replied before he took an breath. "Come on, take an seat." He pointed with his hand to an seat that was just next to his bed but I shook my head.

"No, I'm good." I grinned, thanking him of his gratefulness as I moved next to the wall, crossing my arms and looking down. "Bad thoughts..." I whispered, likely to myself....something that we're been having both.

"Yeah, it's always like this." He affirmed, making me look at him slowly. "Sometimes, it's good and some, it's fucking bad." He added, swearing at the end.

"It's things that we just want to forget and leave them forever but there's always something that brought it back." I exclaimed, taking an deep breath as I was literally mentioning myself at the end. "Was I this 'something' ?" I asked.

"Mmhm..." He nodded slowly, looking away from me.

"I'm sorry." I apologized.

"You couldn't know." He said clearly to me, taking back an normal voice before he did an deep breath, looking back at me. "And I didn't know." He added.

"We both faced the same thing and...." I started, not sure of asking to be honest. "What happened to you ?" I literally asked him, making him look at me with serious eyes.

"You want to know ?" He asked me back and I....slowly nodded even if I didn't want to do that. He redressed himself well on his bed before looking back at me. "In 1961, I was tasked with Woods & and an old friend to kill Castro during the Bay of Pigs invasion." He started, getting my attention on his story, I know that I have to shut my mouth during all of this. "The man we killed....was just an damn decoy and I was captured to make sure that Woods and my friend got away. Castro himself gave me away to....Dragovich."

"Nikita Dragovich..." I whispered and he nodded to me, seeing on his face that I shouldn't say this name.....shut up, Yiri !.....

"Him and his friends...they brainwashed because they wanted me to kill my own president but.....someone stepped inside and changed everything." He continued, looking away from me...especially at the seat like if he was seeing someone sit on it.....better to not ask...."Instead of their orders, the man....ordered me to kill them....to accomplish an vengeance that he wasn't able to do." He smiled at the chair before taking an quick look at me. "I did kill them for me....but also for him."

"What was his name ?" I demanded.

"I can't tell you.....no....I can't tell her." He affirmed, focused on the chair....he was definitely seeing someone on it....maybe that man he's talking about.

"Why are you looking at the chair ?" I did really questioned him about that even if I promised myself to not do it....I'm such stupid for fuck sake.....he shook his head, biting his lips, still looking at the chair.

"We're both alike, Yirina." He looked back at me, sure of his words.....yeah, he was right above all, he's like me, I'm like him but him....he know the pain for years and me....it's been almost 2 months that I'm trying to struggle with myself if we don't count the coma in it. "Me, you...we're facing our own life and wonder how we can fight."

"You know well of the fight but me....I'm still trying to struggle about it." I exclaimed as I removed myself from the wall, de-crossing my arms. "I don't know how I'm still here as I thought that an bullet took me away." I put my finger on my scar at my head.

"You're trying to know more about yourself and to say....you're an lucky girl." He admitted, referring to some of the good events that happened to me even if it wasn't an lot of it. He then start to laid down on his bed, wanting to rest. "I was told once that....people like us....everyone in here, we're just pawns in an big chess game...useful but one your potential is used to its max, we're putting you in the trash." He proclaimed, true in his words....very true to say....

"The Cold War has been an chess game since 1945...." I said, wondering how that conflict between two differents worlds was still on. "Spies has been the pawns for years with people like Adler or Hudson making the moves."

"Yeah." Mason whispered as he moved to face the wall, turning his back to me. "I think that you should go, I need some rest." He suggested and I start to leave his room slowly, knowing more about Mason before I could hear saying randoms numbers at an very low voice and then , I finally left his room, closing the door behind me with an thought in my head.....

We're just pawns....me...him....Park....Zasha....we're all pawns !

[xxisxxisxxis]

Gateway Drug | Part Forty-Three

Table of Content or Part Forty-Two

Read here on wattpad

Words: 3.6k

Warning(s): Explicit language, Drug abuse, Verbal abuse, Sexual situations

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My head is aching from the pressure put on it after crying for hours on end, balls of tissue shrouding the bed around me.

My mind floods with how I'm going to propose attempting to do one of the two things Nikki despises most, not wanting to ask him about it from the jump, but wanting to fix whatever it is that's lacking in our marriage that has me feeling something for someone who I'm not married to.

I know what's lacking, but I'd rather he  hear it from a professional so he can't accuse me of just throwing out bullshit.

Nikki's been home for a few hours now, but he's been avoiding me.

I wonder if he's mad at me for leaving during the tour, or if he hasn't even thought about me and came home, shot up and passed out.

I'm sick with myself, the approach of Nikki's homecoming causing an onslaught of self-chastisement that occurs in the form of random tidbits of Duff and I in my dream, and the possibility that I'm subconsciously getting ready to give up on my marriage, which is the last thing I want to do.

I hear the front door open and shut, along with the sound of Nikki's footsteps growing closer and closer to our bedroom, the rustling of paper bags accompanying him.

I haven't even realized he left the house.

Nerves ball up in my stomach, my hands get sweaty and my breathing starts getting deep.

"Keep your head clear" I hear Andy's voice in my mind and I calm myself down.

The door opens, and the smell of food wafts in the air.

Nikki's carrying fastfood bags, seemingly decently sober.

I sit up, sniffling, and he hands me my drink and a straw before pulling a cheeseburger out of the paper bag, handing it over to me as well as my fries.

"Do you feel any better?" He asks me, calmly, and I furrow my brows a little. "I knew something was up when you weren't waiting by the door. I came in and you were passed out." He explains, his hand pressing to my forehead. "You don't feel like you're running fever."

"I'm not. I just feel like shit." I mumble, taking a sip of my Pepsi.

"I got this while I was out." He adds, opening another paper bag from our pharmacy and I rub my lips together. "The bottle was on the bathroom counter and saw you haven't gotten a refill yet, so..." He shrugs, handing me a pill of my Nardil.

"Thanks." I say, swallowing it down.

He gets his food and knocks my balled up tissues out of the way as he gets into bed next to me.

"What all did you do?" He asks and I look at him, tensing up.

"What?"

"While you've been here? And I've been gone? What all have you done?" He repeats.

"Oh, just went out a few times with the guys. I stayed at home, mostly." I reply.

"I can tell. This place is spotless." He chuckles, eating a few fries.

"Sharise and Skylar stayed with me at night so I wouldn't be by myself." I add and he shakes his head a little.

"We gotta get you outta that, babe." He states and I raise my brows a little in confusion. "Your 'I can't be alone' mentality."

"What about it?"

"It's not really healthy to be that way, don't you think?"

"I think it's normal. Humans weren't made to be by themselves."

"Viv, not being able to be alone is one thing. Not being able to sleep alone is another." He scoffs.

"Vince doesn't ever sleep alone." I point out.

"That's because Vince fucks and then falls asleep with chicks who aren't his wife." Nikki points out.

"Well, I've fallen asleep with dudes who aren't you." I add.

"Robbin, Steven and Vince don't really count." He tells me. "Well, Vince counts a little, but that's because he's a fucking dick."

"Okay, so, who all counts?" I ask him, trying to keep the light tone in my voice.

His answer is blatantly but casually said as if it's common sense, and further causes me to curl into my shell, even more petrified to suggest what I've been planning to suggest to him:

"Anyone you can see yourself fucking." He says.

My body tenses and my appetite is at a loss.

I don't say much of anything else, listening to him go from the topic of the new album, to Tommy's upcoming wedding, and finally, his fuck up.

"Look, Viv," He starts, throwing the wrapper of his finished burger, aside, and I start putting the trash in the empty bags the food came in before setting them on the night stand on my side of the bed before laying back down, facing him. "I know what I did was--"

"--You made a mistake." I cut him short. "And you're still here, so...it's okay."

"No, it's not okay." He argues and I rub my lips together.

"I don't know what else to say about it, Nikki." I reply and he sighs, getting a little frustrated.

"I want you to care, Vivian." He shoots back and I roll on my back, staring up at my reflection on the ceiling, rubbing my forehead to calm the subtle aching beginning to resurface.

"I do care, Nikki, I just don't understand what you want me to do about it. You're the only one who can fix it and you freak out anytime someone mentions you getting help."

"Jesus fuck." He grumbles, kicking his cowboy boot-clad foot into the mattress a little and I sigh out, agitated, as he's about to get up and probably leave.

"Can you just not run off at the slightest argument we have, for once, Nikki?" I beg, my voice cracking as my throat grows thick with tears. "I've had a horrible past couple weeks and I just need you to hold me because you're my husband and that's..." I can't finish, a wave of obnoxious sobs coming out of nowhere.

"Vivian, what is wrong? Huh?" He asks me, genuinely, scooting closer to me and wrapping his arms around me as I lay against his chest.

It's obvious this goes beyond "I don't feel good."

People don't cry uncontrollably when they have a cold.

"I'm just going through something right now." I reply in between uneven breaths.

"Baby, what's wrong?"

I wish I could tell him everything. Every miscarriage, every repressed fear of our future...having mental sex with Duff.

I know the Duff situation shouldn't be a big deal to me, but it is. A very big deal. A very red flag. A very tiny issue that cam and will manifest if not dealt with accordingly.

Dread of the conversation of seeing a marriage counselor with Nikki sneaks into me, adding to my plate of shit I have yet to disclose to him.

"I don't know." I lie to him. "I guess I just really miss you."

"I'm right here, Viv." He chuckles a little.

I want to say, "the old Nikki", but decide against an entirely different argument, before relaxing a little as he runs his fingertips in random patterns at the bottom of my back, and falling asleep.

The thing that pissed Nikki off about my crying spells, which occurred more often the worse his use got, was that he felt emasculated by it.

He couldn't make me feel better because he couldn't get off drugs, and I couldn't even tell him about the weight on my heart from my misfortune with pregnancy and my growing confusion about my feelings for another man.

He knew he was failing me by having an affair, staying on drugs, disregarding our vows, causing me pain, which made him do more drugs to numb the pain of that knowledge, which made him act out even more.

And all I could do was scream at him, cry, flush his stash, vandalize our house, vandalize his cars and bikes, and screw the support's bassist.

But before we resulted to that...

I let out one more muffled moan as he grabs at a fist full of my hair, delivering one more thrust into me before he's finishing on my bare ass and tucking himself back in his pants.

"Nikki, I thought you said we would talk when you got back home." I lowly remind him as I clean myself off, hearing our friends in our living room.

He takes a drink of his Jack on the  bathroom counter and shrugs.

"We can talk later, babe." He tells me, for the hundredth time since he's been back home two weeks, now, and I rub my lips together.

"Well, Nikki, we kinda need to talk about as soon as we can." I pull my pants and shirt back on.

"And we will. Just chill out."

"Okay, well, we should've talked about it over a week ago if that were the case. And I've been chilling out but I'm starting to get the idea that you don't care."

"If I didn't care what you had to say, I'd tape your pretty little mouth shut, Viv." He drunkenly spurs at me, pulling me closer to him, and I raise a brow. "Don't look at me like that, babe, I--Okay, look. Your buddies are here." He laughs me off, motioning to door, reminding me  Slash, Izzy, Duff, Steven, and even Axl are over here--although I'm sure Axl's only here for the 5'3" platinum blonde playmate that I can hear going back and forth with Steven about how to properly play cards. "Tommy and Vince are coming over, Vince is bringing Sharise and you, her, and Tansy are like the trifecta or something so you can have girl time and catch up. It's gonna be a good time. We'll talk after, alright?" He assures me and I let out a breath.

"Alright." I mumble.

He smirks, giving me a sloppy kiss before I'm heading out to see everybody.

I roll my eyes and head to the kitchen, preparing myself to face Duff, who I haven't seen in three weeks.

We hung out once after I stayed at their place, and that's been it.

I step into the kitchen to see someone in our fridge, grabbing a beer, and when the door shuts I'm face to face with all six feet and four inches of McKagan.

"There you are." He chuckles out, opening the bottle with an opener on his keys and I try to catch my breath and not show signs of panic. "Thought you'd, like, died or something." He adds.

"Oh, no, I just didn't feel good." I explain.

"Yeah, Nikki told me." He replies, taking a sip of his beer. "Do you feel better now?" He asks me and I nod, although it's certain I'm not 'okay' necessarily. "You sure?"

"Yeah." I lie, smiling a little.

It was bullshit, he knew it was bullshit.

"Alright." He doesn't ask again, instead stepping to the kitchen door, purposely shoving at me with his shoulder, nearly knocking me down.

I fire back, shoving at him with mine, and we continue until we're laughing, racing to the living room.

There's an exposed seat beside Tansy and we both eye it before rambunctiously trying to see who gets there first.

We get there simultaneously, sitting down, scrunched into each other as we fight for our footing, more so assing, as we both make an effort to worm the other person off of the couch cushion.

"Move giraffe neck!" I demand in a laugh, struggling to get him out of the way.

"Not a chance, mother mary!" He replies in the same tone, managing to keep his beer from spilling.

He wins, eventually, getting me out of the way.

I'm about to give him a light hearted earful when he's pulling me into his lap.

I make sure to keep my ass on his knees, nowhere near his crotch, and he's not thinking anything of it, obviously, until Axl hears Nikki coming out of our bedroom, and I'm too busy laughing to notice.

Axl's black boot is kicking out and shoving me to the floor before Nikki can see me on Duff, and Duff and I look at the red head, about to go off on him, until we realize what he did.

Nikki's obviously just shot up, wiping the dribble of vomit from his chin with the back of his hand as his eyes play their tricks.

I'm assuming it was a speedball.

I know damn well we aren't having that talk tonight...or ever, possibly.

Never will be a good time.

The doorbell rings, and I'm eager to jump up and see who it is, to avoid going off on Nikki, crossing my fingers that it's hopefully Vince, Sharise, and Tommy.

I open the door, my eyes immediately going to Skylar's round, chubby little face as she wears a baby pink, velvet headband with a giant matching velvet flower attached to it, and a long sleeved, white onesie with baby pink socks on her little feet.

"Hey, guys." I say, stepping aside to let them in.

"'Sup, Viv." Tommy grins out widely, patting my head. His energetic mood is a deep contrast of Vince's.

"Hey." Sharise gives me a side hug and I let Skylar wrap her hand around my finger, looking at me with wide eyes and eye brows that clearly show the expression that she knows me but also doesn't know me.

"Hey, Viv." Vince flatly greets me, giving me a peck on the cheek, irritated, and I can see Sharise is in the same mood.

Great. Another couple that's wanting to kill each other. Nikki and I are in good company.

"Hey, Vince." I reply as he follows Tommy.

Skylar is kicking her feet, smiling and waving her hands, now, and Sharise hands her over to me.

"Hey, pretty girl." I greet her as me and her mom go to the living room with everyone...just in time to see Steven ripping a bong. "Baby!" I call, and all their attention shifts to the kid in my arms and they all groan a little.

Rule of "Baby": no drinking from bottles, smoking cigarettes, doing drugs, being gross with groupies, dropping f-bombs, or being a jackass when a child is around...even if the child isn't even one year yet.

It came after Skylar let out a loud and proud "Fuh!" a month prior, and at first we thought it was a random noise she was making while babbling, until she repeated the word over time until it was  pretty obvious she was practicing her pronunciation of the word "fuck," which she had heard from every person in that room.

After that, anytime someone called "baby" the cigarettes were put out, the drugs were put up, the groupies were put on behavioral probation, the alcohol was put into solo cups and the bottles were hidden, and everyone's favorite word was forbidden.

Of course they could go to another room and do anything they wanted, just not with a child in sight.

And they could complain all they wanted, but I think they liked the thought of kids being the only people able to make them clean up their act, even temporarily.

Steven puts his bong away, Duff gathers the liquor bottles and heads to the kitchen to pour it into solo cups, Slash puts out his cigarette and Nikki...

"It's fucking stupid. She's not gonna remember anything of it." Nikki snaps out a couple minutes later as Duff attempts to hand him a cup of Jack, but he refuses, motioning to Skylar once Sharise, Tansy, Steven and I are in the floor with her, and I roll my eyes.

"Babe, it's just for a few minutes. She's gonna go to sleep eventually." I tell him calmly.

"Yeah, Nikki, she usually goes to bed about an hour from now." Sharise adds.

"Sharise, it's his house." Vince takes up for Nikki. "He doesn't come over to our house and dictate what we do and don't do." 

"They can still do it, just not around our daughter." Sharise tells him.

"Exactly. There's plenty of other rooms in the house and an entire back yard." I add.

"Why bring your baby to a fucking get together like this, anyway?" Nikki asks her rudely. "You guys don't have a nanny or something?"

"Nikki." I scold him, giving him a "shut up" look.

He ignores me.

"I-I don't want a nanny raising my daughter, Nikki." Sharise states, trying to keep her cool.

"Well, then why didn't you just stay home?" He continues to come after her.

"Dude." Izzy mumbles behind us, obviously getting fed up, and I pray he doesn't say anything to Nikki or Vince to fuel the fire.

Izzy wasn't into ego, and Nikki and Vince had plenty of it...well, Vince and Sikki.

"Because I wanted to see her." I reply before Sharise can. "And the baby."

"Of course you did because stick-in-the mud Sober Sixx really knows how to keep the party going: a fucking baby." Nikki scoffs, cutting his eyes at me.

"I'd rather be known as a stick-in-the-mud than known for sticking myself at 45° angles." I snap harshly.

Everyone winces a little, and Nikki grinds his teeth together.

"What the hell is your fucking problem?!" Nikki barks at me.

"Oh, I am so glad you asked, I've only been trying to talk to you about for the past two and a half weeks!" I snap.

"Well it's not my problem I've got more important things to do than listen to you whine about our fucking relationship! You've only been doing for nearly two years now, but then you never really tell me what the fuck is wrong, so I'm kinda fucking numb to it by now!"

"I wouldn't expect you not to be numb to it, Nikki! I would be, too, if my nerves were as shot as every last cc of junk I blew my freaking money on!"

"Maybe we should go outside for a little bit--"

"--Sit down!" Nikki and I both yell at Steven before he can stand up, causing everyone else to awkwardly settle back into their seats, because they were getting ready to follow him out.

"Okay." He calmly mumbles, reaching for his cup of booze before he starts chugging.

In fact, I'm noticing them all taking more and more long sips of their drinks.

They're probably going to have grey hairs from stress after leaving tonight.

"See, look, you're turning my friends into alcoholics with your bullshit!" I accuse Nikki and he let's out a loud "HA!"

"Okay, so they're just your friends, now?!" He let's out.

By this point Skylar starts getting fussy with our screaming and Sharise attempts to calm her down.

I'm about to ask her to politely go take Skylar outside or to a different part of the house, even though by the looks of it, she's getting ready to do so anyway.

"Can you shut your God damn baby up, Sharise?!" Nikki's going after her again.

Now it seems either Izzy, Axl or Duff is about to say something, until I intervene to save them a fist fight with someone who can help their careers...not that they would even want his help anymore.

"Can you shut your God damn mouth up, Nikki?!" I stand up, ready to punch him, again, and he stands, too.

"Alright, guys--" Tommy starts but is quickly shut up with a glare from Nikki.

"Jesus fucking Christ, Viv, this is why I'm on smack! So I can get a fucking escape from being trapped in a house with you!"

"For someone who's so miserable being married to me, you sure as hell were adamant about doing so!"

"Until I realized I married a fucking psychopath!" He throws at me, pointing his finger my way.

"And I married a junkie!" I shoot back. "And all you're ever gonna be is a freaking junkie and all you're ever gonna do is junk and party and convince yourself you don't need help when you clearly do! You don't give a fuck about me or our marriage and thank fucking God we don't have kids because you'd probably sell one of them for more smack when we run out of money after your career goes down in flames when you stop giving a single fuck about music, which will probably happen in the next year since you're already writing shitty songs!" I can't stop what's coming out of my mouth, seeing him being hurt by it, disguising it as angry tears when I know I struck a chord of an entirely new emotion in him.

He was already beginning to get discouraged with his new music he was working up for the band's next album, but what I said just validated his lack of confidence.

"I'm not just gonna do junk." He calms down, which let's me know he's officially at his pique. "I'm gonna file for divorce, pack up all your shit, and have it in the yard by tomorrow night, and I'm finally gonna tell you how much I hate being married to you." He tells me and I nod like he's being serious.

"You're such a fucking--" Duff starts but I interrupt him. 

I don't even think Nikki notices.

"No, you're gonna go feel sorry for yourself, lock yourself in the closet, shoot up, wake up, feel like a fucking prick--because you are one--then you're gonna ignore me for a few days even though you know I'm right, then we're gonna go to Tommy and Heather's wedding, and the day after, I'm calling Doc and Bob Timmons, we will be attending therapy for our marriage and you will be dragged to rehab kicking and screaming."

And thus the battle between Sikki Nixx and Rabid Bitch Vivian began with no inkling it would become a full-blown war.

[punkscowardschampions]

Amelia & Jac

Amelia: [okay so I'll put here what we said, for Jac's 18th Savannah sent her some flowers and Amelia binned them, obviously a big fight ensued and they haven't interacted from then in September to now which is nearly Christmas until Amelia sends her a christmas gift of the gay book with a portrait of Jac inside that'll just fall out when she picks it up and a chanel lipstick of some cute shade or other] Jac: [my vibe was if it was left on the step, leaving the book out there and taking the lipstick to send a message 'cos assumedly we'll walk past at some point as we live central] Amelia: [love that] Jac: If you were gonna take it upon yourself to decide I didn't want Savannah's gift, you should have also realised the same rule would apply to yourself Amelia: maybe Jac: No, you should have Jac: you wasted your money and time Amelia: I've got nothing else to do with either, so it hardly matters Jac: I'm not your distraction Jac: leave me alone Amelia: no, you're way more than that Amelia: but okay Jac: I don't have the energy for this Amelia: I didn't do this to force a conversation with you Jac: right Amelia: you're right, I shouldn't have got you anything Jac: you really shouldn't Jac: I don't want anything from you Amelia: alright, message received Jac: for fuck's sake Amelia: What do you want me to say? Amelia: it's been months, I miss you, I hate this Jac: You're about a lifetime too late for any of this Jac: things change Amelia: just go then Jac: Don't tell me what to do Jac: you haven't even apologized Amelia: because you're the only one who can tell me what I should or shouldn't do, okay then Jac: I declined your gift because I don't fucking want it Jac: that's my decision Jac: you can't force it on me Amelia: like it was my decision to get you one, even if you don't fucking want it Amelia: like it's my decision not to apologise when I'm not sorry Jac: it wasn't your decision to make Amelia: I know that Jac: She reached out to me Jac: and you ruined it Amelia: she didn't reach out, it was a cop out Jac: she remembered Jac: she didn't have to do anything Amelia: she didn't do anything Amelia: not even sign her name Amelia: fuck's sake,  and you're mad at ME for my lack of apology Jac: Yes she did, she sent my favourite flowers Jac: and yes I'm fucking mad at you, you don't even know what you started Amelia: at least hold her to the same standard Jac: No, because you aren't the same Jac: and this gift meant something to me, the gesture did Jac: and you couldn't stand that so you took it away Amelia: the false hope meant something to you Amelia: of course I can't stand that Jac: there's nothing false about it Jac: she was never here for my birthday before, not as my friend, she had no reason to remember, I'm blocked on anything that would tell her Amelia: because it's so hard to get around being blocked Jac: so, that would just prove she cared enough to look Jac: either way, that meant something Amelia: it doesn't mean she's coming back Amelia: or dumping her boyfriend Jac: it still means more to me than anything you could ever give or do Jac: so you deal with that Amelia: I can't Jac: You'll find my sympathy running a bit low Amelia: that's how I always find it Jac: I don't have the space in my head or my life to care about you Jac: alright, and I've never said different Amelia: yeah you have Jac: when? Jac: a million years ago when we were kids Jac: life's moved on from then Amelia: this year, things have happened that mean something, you've made space for me and cared about me Amelia: I don't need words, you lie whenever you speak anyway Amelia: and yeah, that's how long it's been, that's she's been gone and I've been here for you Amelia: you can't deal with that any better than you're telling me I have to Jac: I've only cared about myself Jac: that's facts Jac: you've been of some use and that's about as deep as it gets Jac: ask anyone, Amelia Amelia: No Jac: Yes Amelia: you love to make me look and feel crazy but I'm actually not Jac: because normal people throw other people's presents away Amelia: you know why I did Jac: and normal people let themselves be treated like this Jac: yeah, you're so right Amelia: there's a massive gap between normal and the levels of delusional you're trying to make me out to be right now Jac: I'm not trying to make you out to be anything Jac: I'm trying to get you to leave me alone, at best Amelia: and I've said I will Jac: then go Amelia: [does] Amelia: [gonna take this moment to tell you what the book is, We Are Okay by Nina LaCour it's obvs gay and YA again but we've lost the optimism of the previous Christmas because this one is about grief and loss and loneliness, basically this girl leaves her life behind without saying a word (again to go to college lol) after her grandad dies but then her friend who she's in love with and who I think is straight comes to visit her there so she gotta start dealing with all her shit, very apt Amelia well done. I think it does have a happy ending for said main character based on the title but not a fluffy one and she isn't getting with that friend I'm p sure] Amelia: [In clearer terms, this is a book about Marin, a girl who has lost her grandfather, and in doing so, pushed away her former best friend, Mabel. So when Mabel comes to town, Marin does not know what to do with the memories. Marin at once does not want Mabel here, regrets her being here, but also desperately wants Mabel to love her. She has walls up and she wants them down, but she is too terrified for them to ever come down. Marin has lost everything, including Mabel, her best friend and her maybe-something-more.  But it’s not a romance between Marin and Mabel. That is what is perhaps the saddest part. I once saw Nina LaCour talk live about this book, and she said something that perfectly sums up what is so arresting about this book: being queer and in love with your best friend is different than being straight and in love with your best friend. One is an experience in first love, and one is also that, but with an added experience of fear – not of rejection but of disgust. We do not want to hurt our best friends by loving them. We have learned to be ashamed of love and we carry that with us, through thick and through thin. BYE] Jac: [well, v on the nose, soz we won't be reading that hun and we didn't read the last one, so rude] Amelia: [maybe years from now bitch you will and you'll see what we were trying to give you] Jac: [perhaps but clearly not this one as it has essentially washed away lmao] Amelia: [something v poetic about a book about grief and loss and loneliness getting left on the step to disintegrate, when this is a film or netflix show I'll be v smug] Jac: [truly, the drama of it all] Jac: [setting it on fire is so last year, anyway, my thought is Amelia sees Jac and Jesse out somewhere but not out out like somewhere boring and every day which is confusing as it was to the fam 'cos she knows she's not talking or hanging out with them so she's like hmm] Amelia: [good idea but I don't know how I'm gonna be like oi what are you doing when it's none of your business hen LOL] Jac: [Jesse could talk to her 'cos we've established doesn't take a hint and it's like the most awkward] Amelia: [yeah because they are gonna be lowkey friends off and on even though she said they weren't after the vday thing last year so and maybe she asks about his gig he's meant to be doing or whatever cos he would've had to announce he ain't doing it on socials and everything like] Jac: [Jac just casually snapping at her like mind yo business Amelia] Amelia: [I'll pick the convo up after that fun little interaction then] Jac: [when you shoulda said nothing but it came out henny] Amelia: Don't talk to me like that Jac: Don't talk to my brother how's that Amelia: redundant Amelia: because I'll talk to him whenever I like as long as he's not the one upset about it Jac: Yeah, you've established you're a liar before now Amelia: No, we've established I have nothing to gain by keeping any promises to you Jac: and I give a fuck about what you wanna take from me Jac: you need to disappear, I don't want you in my life now, not even peripherally Amelia: I don't wanna take anything from you and I'm not Amelia: but disappearing isn't an option for a bit Jac: Contradict yourself immediately, it's really not a waste of my time Amelia: You're wasting your own time by continuing to have a go at me Amelia: when school's over we'll both be leaving, until then we're both stuck Jac: It wouldn't be a waste of time if you actually listened Amelia: likewise Jac: to what? Amelia: me obviously Jac: you have nothing I've ever wanted to hear Jac: and you're continuing to talk more bullshit now Jac: literally, mind your own business, it should not be hard Amelia: neither should getting your head around the concept that me talking to Jess isn't about you Jac: he isn't your friend Jac: he's my brother, I trump any kind of connection you had or wanna have for whatever sad reason Jac: so yeah, fuck off Amelia: if you want to make him choose, give him your bullshit ultimatum, I won't be Jac: No, you leave us alone Jac: it's like having a fucking stalker Jac: I am sick of the sight of you Amelia: I have left you alone like you asked Amelia: he's asked me to do no such thing Jac: You're pathetic Jac: get some friends of your own and you wouldn't have to cling on to someone being civil towards you Amelia: I've heard it all before Jac: then take the hint Jac: I'm so fed up of you and your moping Amelia: then take the 'advice' you're trying to give me and fuck off Jac: you see me coming, you should turn the other way Jac: I did not need to see you today, fuck's sake Amelia: yeah, I'll turn my desk around too, get back into detention, it has been a while Amelia: I wasn't looking for you, I don't want to see you either Jac: then it's in your best interest to run when you see Jesse coming then Jac: so glad you reached the logical conclusion, try to do it at the time next time, tah Amelia: bye then Jac: you're unbelievable Jac: you don't even feel remotely bad for what you've done Amelia: of course I fucking do Jac: bullshit Amelia: No it's not Amelia: but I'm not going to sit here and type out how and why I feel like shit when it means nothing Jac: you aren't sorry, you said, and you've not made any kind of attempt to actually make amends, not that you can now, it's too late Jac: it's all about how you feel and that you miss me and whatever else Jac: you don't care what I've been through Amelia: I'm not sorry for 🗑💐 but I'm sorry for hurting you Amelia: and that this means I'm not there now for whatever is happening Amelia: like you said, it's too late now Amelia: and like you also said, even if I was there, it's not good enough anyway so Jac: because this isn't some soppy book you read Jac: you aren't gonna save me and it'll all be happily ever afters Jac: this is real life and it's so much bigger than all this Jac: shit that you care about Amelia: yeah, it's my real life too Jac: none of this is real Jac: you're putting off getting one by kidding yourself that this will ever happen Amelia: it is to me Jac: just wait Jac: you'll find out soon enough Jac: this is nothing, all of it Amelia: maybe to you Jac: no fucking maybe Jac: you're a child, your problems are childish Jac: that's factual and I can't pretend to entertain it now Amelia: then don't Amelia: my problems aren't the same as yours because I'm not you any more than I could be Savannah fucking Moore, but guess what, it's not a competition Jac: they're non-existent Amelia: No, they exist, same as I do Amelia: but you don't have to bother about them or me Jac: Get over yourself, Amelia Jac: people have real shit going on, real stuff to deal with Jac: and you want anyone to care about your self-inflicted, whiney, entitled bullshit Jac: for what? 'cos you're an AMAZING friend, yeah, you don't use everything to your advantage or make it all about you Amelia: not really, I want you get away from me like you keep saying you want Jac: I didn't send you a present, loser Amelia: I didn't start a conversation about it Amelia: or keep this one going Jac: because you should feel fucking bad about what you did and you don't Jac: not even an eighth of what I do Amelia: I do feel bad, what do you want me to do to prove it, kill myself? For fuck's sake Jac: yeah good idea Amelia: nothing is good enough for you Amelia: you'd even twist that into something it isn't Jac: fucking try it Jac: I don't want you around Amelia: okay Jac: my life is ruined Jac: you don't get to be okay, you don't get to care about your pathetic crush Amelia: you don't get to tell me what to do or how to feel because your life is ruined Jac: Yes I do Amelia: No you don't Jac: really 'cos you've been pretty easy to manipulate this far Jac: don't act as if you've had say in anything Jac: that's about the only use you have had Amelia: well it's over, all of it Jac: call it like it hasn't been for months on my say so Jac: what is the point of you being alive, actually Amelia: I don't know Amelia: my parents, I guess Jac: good luck with getting that to last then Amelia: 🤞🍀🌠 Jac: give you 'til your late 20s before that stops being enough Amelia: it already isn't Jac: like I said, find some real trauma like the rest of us Jac: gives you something to cling to Amelia: or more to collapse under the weight of Jac: you don't even want to survive Amelia: and what? Jac: and that's the fundamental reason Savannah is better than you Jac: and I am too Jac: all I have is the shit behind me to drive me forwards Jac: and your ideal is to wallow in it Amelia: you've got a million reasons why, I don't care how they're numbered, to be honest Jac: you deserve the nothing you're left with and the nothingness that's coming Amelia: that's worked out perfectly then Jac: I swear to God you're lucky he was there Jac: any other day Amelia: yeah Amelia: you know what lessons to find me in Jac: I'm taking time off Jac: so you can have them Amelia: I really am lucky Amelia: maybe it'll make me care about 20 years in the future, like you do, or 5 or 1 Amelia: drive me forwards too Jac: unlikely Amelia: right now it is Amelia: I'm just trying to get through this conversation Jac: Jesus Amelia: my 🤔💭 exactly Jac: you clueless bitch Amelia: what am I supposed to be clued into? Amelia: we haven't spoken for ages Jac: and that's hardly a mystery Amelia: slag me off as much as you like, I don't know what's going on Jac: didn't inherit that off your mum then Amelia: clearly not Jac: yeah well when she finds out somehow you can hear all about it Amelia: finds out what? Jac: now you're gonna ask how I am Amelia: if you were in the hospital again or something that's more important than any of this bullshit Amelia: please just tell me Jac: no, because you did a grand gesture I didn't ask for so now I'm really all good Amelia: a Christmas present isn't a grand gesture Amelia: or what matters Jac: yeah, no shit it isn't Amelia: can you just Jac: what, tell you what's wrong with me? Jac: will that make you feel better Amelia: No Jac: yeah, that makes it almost seem worth it Amelia: forget it Amelia: I'll find out when everyone else does or I won't Jac: yeah Jac: your fake concern for 2 seconds was really comforting Amelia: nothing about this is fake for me Amelia: I don't know how many more times or ways I can make that fucking obvious Jac: you're all talk Jac: I expect nothing more or less from you at this point Amelia: because talking is all I can do Amelia: you won't take a 🎁 I'm not risking an actual gesture Jac: yeah, I heard Jac: nothing in it for you Amelia: okay, tell me I'm wrong Amelia: tell me there is Jac: no Amelia: say something Amelia: give me literally anything Jac: how many times can you be told it's not about you before you get it Jac: it's not about caring because I throw you false hope Jac: we were friends, once Amelia: which is exactly why I want you to tell me what it's really about Amelia: I care about you, I fucking love you Amelia: and something bad has happened Jac: depends on your point of view Amelia: put all of this bullshit between us aside and talk to me Amelia: you said it, we were friends Jac: I don't know if I actually want to hurt you this bad Jac: call me stupid Amelia: it's not about me, remember? Jac: still Jac: it's Amelia: you aren't going to talk to anyone else Jac: Jesse knows Jac: and my parents Amelia: that doesn't mean they know how you feel, just what's happened Jac: you won't be able to know either Jac: it isn't gay Amelia: this can still be one of those times where you say things to me that you don't to anyone else, if you want Amelia: if it'll help you Jac: Nothing will help me Jac: but I don't care Jac: I've got a baby Amelia: what? Jac: a dead one now Amelia: oh Jac: yep Amelia: when? Jac: it's why Jesse cancelled his gig Amelia: of course Amelia: that makes sense Jac: so now you know Amelia: yeah Jac: so yeah, there's nothing to be said or done and that's seriously it Amelia: okay, well I'm here if that ever changes Amelia: my mum's never gotten over it but I know talking helped her Jac: talking isn't going to assuage the guilt of creating and destroying life Jac: maybe I'll go pray but I doubt that does either Amelia: I don't know Amelia: there must be a reason therapy is so popular, you're the wannabe psychologist Jac: hope Jac: I'm not interested Amelia: alright, no talking Amelia: do you want to go out? Jac: and bleed over the four pairs of tights I'd have to wear to stop it running straight down my legs? Amelia: a no would be a perfectly acceptable answer Jac: yeah, it's perfectly acceptable to bother a therapist about it so you never mention it to anyone else Amelia: you're not going to mention it anyway, you've said as much Jac: that has nothing to do with your sensibilities Jac: if I wanted to, I could go into horrific detail Amelia: yeah, you could Amelia: you could also bleed all over my car if you wanted to Jac: Yeah right Jac: your entire street is curtain twitchers Amelia: we won't be hanging out on my street Jac: there's nowhere I could go that'll make me forget either Amelia: you've been stuck inside for days with your family, it's hardly a grand gesture to suggest taking you literally anywhere else Amelia: but okay Jac: Jess won't let me go anyway Jac: last time I said I'd hang out with you and he believed it I fucked your girlfriend so Amelia: you kissed her Jac: oh yeah Jac: same difference Amelia: no Amelia: there's quite a big difference Jac: maybe I told him I did then Jac: I don't remember Amelia: probably Jac: the outcome was the same is the point Amelia: the point is, Jess won't let you go Amelia: I got that Jac: I had to have someone come with Amelia: yeah Jac: not about to ask the poor sod who did it Amelia: have you told him though? Jac: yeah Jac: fucking embarrassing Amelia: I assume you're less likely to accidentally run into him than you are me Jac: I think I got points for dealing with it and being cool anyway Jac: go me Amelia: great Jac: it don't matter Jac: only would have if he'd kicked up a fuss Jac: but he didn't seem the sort and that's one less thing for me to feel guilty about so fuck it Amelia: does Darla know? Jac: I told her false alarm Jac: had to ask her about him so Amelia: then why do you think everyone's going to find out? Jac: people somehow always do Jac: I don't care anymore, not now Amelia: if my mum hasn't heard, it's unlikely Amelia: she knew about your alcohol poisoning immediately Jac: beneath her to have connections with an abortion clinic Amelia: she's not god squad Jac: close enough Amelia: my aunt had one after having Olivia, there was something wrong with the baby apparently Amelia: my mum wasn't protesting outside Jac: that's different then Jac: you have a reason, people can repeat that to themselves until they forget about it Amelia: you had a reason too Amelia: everyone does Jac: no, I had an excuse Amelia: you had a reason Jac: no, I didn't Amelia: yeah, you did Amelia: and if anyone else did it for the same reason you wouldn't call it an excuse Jac: Yes I would Amelia: you hate yourself, before this, after this and because of this Amelia: stop Jac: I didn't need to get pregnant, I did and then I killed it Jac: anyone who did that, I'd think exactly the same Amelia: you didn't mean to Amelia: and if you're going to punish yourself this hard for every mistake you ever make then you're going to last even less time than you think I will Jac: You don't act like that not not mean to Jac: all I need to do is live this year then I'll be doing what I actually want Amelia: and that's enough of a reason, don't you get that Jac: enough of a reason for what Amelia: you can't just have a baby you don't want Amelia: it's not like fucking lads you don't care about Jac: no one made me do any of it Jac: so it's not a reason Jac: it's stepping away from any responsibility Amelia: you made you Amelia: and you'd be a shit mum Jac: no, that's bullshit Jac: you tell yourself what you like about it but I know what I did Amelia: tell me you enjoyed it, any of the times Jac: it's sex Jac: that's one of but not the only point Amelia: say it then Amelia: what your point is Jac: Why am I repeating myself? Jac: I know what I did Jac: you aren't going to convince me otherwise Amelia: Why are you doing it? Jac: Well I can't anymore, actually Jac: 2 weeks minimum Amelia: but why have you ever? Jac: because I want to Amelia: you want Savannah Amelia: it hasn't helped you forget that, it won't Jac: neither do you but you didn't tell me not to do that Jac: I can still want to fuck guys Jac: end of Amelia: fine, I'll say it now Jac: yeah Amelia: I can't do this any more Jac: we aren't Amelia: we've said that before, it has to be different this time Jac: whatever Jac: you expect me to make promises to you? Jac: I don't fucking care, Amelia Jac: you deal with it, it's not my problem Amelia: okay Jac: Christ sake Amelia: What? Jac: Never mind, right, off you go Amelia: I'm not going Jac: 🙄 Amelia: you don't care, I heard you before Jac: you want it to be different this time Jac: do something about it Amelia: I'm not having sex with you, that's what I'm doing differently Jac: what's the point in that Jac: doing all the other shit, there's barely any difference Amelia: because I shouldn't have ever but I can't take any of it back Jac: we don't need to be friends either Amelia: we're not Jac: then leave Jac: why half-arse it, that's my point Amelia: I can't leave Jac: just the situation Jac: you don't actually need to kill yourself Amelia: no, I can't leave you Jac: don't be daft Amelia: I'm not repeating myself either Jac: please yourself Amelia: fuck you Jac: you'll be a long time waiting for a thank you Jac: I didn't ask for this Amelia: neither did I Jac: you have a choice Amelia: yeah, and I've made it Jac: and what? Jac: what would you like me to say? Amelia: don't say anything Amelia: I'd honestly love that Jac: yeah, I bet Amelia: the back and forth between utter lies and bullshit and brutal fucking honesty is worse than just the gaslighting Jac: then go away Jac: you're doing this to you Jac: I don't want you here Amelia: you're doing it to me Jac: no, I'm not Amelia: you are Jac: I'm literally telling you to go Amelia: you're always telling me to go Amelia: it's been over a year Jac: your lack of resolve is not my fault Amelia: if you really don't want me here, do something about it Jac: No, because I'm not crying about it Jac: if you feel so gaslit, fuck off Jac: don't reply, don't engage Jac: I don't owe you anything Amelia: you're literally complaining about it Jac: because you're crying wolf Jac: I can and will do what I want, that's how it's always been Amelia: It's no different for me, I've always done what I want too Jac: no, you're being horribly manipulated and used Jac: poor little Amelia Amelia: you fucking said it as a brag earlier Amelia: how easy it is Jac: so why are you repeating it back to me, like I don't know? Jac: you're waiting for me to deny it, or apologize and say it's not true and I care SO much Jac: get real Amelia: I'm waiting for you to stop Amelia: actually do anything you say you're going to Jac: why? Jac: why are you expecting me to act like I'm fine when I'm not Jac: keep making the same wrong call and act surprised when I do what feels right Jac: for fuck's sake, Amelia Amelia: I don't know Amelia: maybe because I'm not fine either but I don't treat you like this Jac: maybe 'cos you've got no willpower Jac: maybe 'cos struggling is a competition and I'm winning Amelia: maybe Jac: 🤔💭 on that Amelia: obviously Jac: fun never stops Jac: enjoy, like Amelia: 🎢 🎠🎪 Jac: 'tis the season Amelia: Merry Christmas 🎄🎅⛄ Jac: great Amelia: yeah Jac: make you feel better that? Amelia: 1. you literally don't care 2. neither do I Jac: I'm literally still bleeding from having my baby chemically expelled and you don't get any joy out of wishing me a Merry Christmas? Jac: what is the fucking point, if you're gonna be a cunt, commit to it Amelia: there's no point to any of this, we both get that Jac: nah, it actually makes me feel better to make you feel worse Jac: that's the point Jac: I have loads of them Jac: it's you who has zero idea what the fuck she's doing Jac: as per Amelia: oh well in that case, carry on Jac: if you hadn't worked that out by now, there is no hope for you Amelia: there's no hope for me anyway, as you've said repeatedly Jac: you seem pretty resigned to this whole victim thing you've got going on Jac: it's a fair observation Amelia: I'm sure it is Jac: yep, that's right, curl up into a ball 'til it's over Jac: fuck this Amelia: until what's over? Jac: the attack, whatever you wanna call it Amelia: I don't want to call it anything, I don't want to do this Amelia: you're the one who's getting something out of it, unless that's another lie Jac: then don't Jac: why the fuck are you still here? Amelia: because I can't fucking leave when you're in the middle of an abortion Amelia: for fuck's sake Jac: the good friend points are not being counted any more Amelia: I don't care Amelia: if this is all I can do, over nothing, then so be it Jac: you're gonna let yourself be a punching bag Jac: seriously Amelia: why not? Amelia: it's not like it's the first time, or that I haven't for things that matter less Amelia: and it's too late to change any of that Jac: because I want you to stop Jac: to fight back Jac: to not do this shit anymore Amelia: I'm not fighting you right now, even if I had the strength to ever Jac: it's like Jac: you don't understand how dangerous it is Jac: what if this was someone else Jac: do you wanna end up like that, getting knocked about and taken advantage of Amelia: I don't give a fuck about the future, remember? Jac: well stop it Amelia: no Jac: stop Amelia: no Jac: fine Jac: I'll go Amelia: okay, go

[punkscowardschampions]

Rio & Buster

Rio: Nance text me so I'm here Rio: but, you don't have to talk if you don't want Rio: but you can too Buster: Get out Buster: You can't be here Rio: I am now so Rio: Avoid the living room, like Buster: Just go Rio: Buster, what's happened? Buster: Rio, just leave Buster: It's what you're gonna wanna do anyway Rio: I can't 'til your family is back Rio: Why? Buster: Please Buster: I can't do this Rio: But you have to? Buster: I don't know Buster: I don't fucking know anymore what I have to do Rio: Alright Rio: You've got to decide right now? Buster: The decision's already been made Rio: Okay Rio: Who by? Buster: Chlo as per Rio: What's she done now? Buster: Don't Rio: What can I do? Rio: Or do you want your Dad or? Buster: I don't want any of you Rio: What do you want? Buster: Like that matters Buster: It's all fucked Rio: It does Buster: To you maybe Buster: For as long as that's about to last Rio: Definitely Rio: I'm not going anywhere Buster: You can't say that Buster: You don't know Rio: I can Rio: Talk to me Buster: Fine, but you asked for this Buster: You should've just left Buster: Chlo's pregnant. She says it's mine Rio: Ah Rio: That explains it Buster: Is that all you've got to say? Rio: I don't know what to say Rio: Just, I get it Buster: No you don't Buster: You can't Rio: I'm not saying that Rio: I get why your room is trashed Buster: Well, cheers Buster: Come up if you wanna smash something yourself Rio: Jesus Buster: And if not, you know now so you can go Rio: No Buster: Yes Rio: I'm not going Buster: I'm not gonna cry on your shoulder about this so where does that leave us? Rio: I don't know Buster: Let me know when you figure it out, like Rio: What, you get to not know but I've got to work it all out Buster: Not really my decision what you wanna do, is it Rio: Well Rio: I don't fucking know Buster: You and me both, babe Rio: What is she doing? Buster: Keeping it Buster: And hopefully a DNA like I asked Rio: Right Rio: and if it's yours, what are you doing? Buster: Raising a kid with her Buster: Nothing else I can do Rio: There is but Rio: that's the right thing Buster: No there isn't Rio: Not the first or last Buster: Yeah 'cause that worked out so well for Drew and your sister Rio: Well, how the hell do you reckon this is this going to work out well Rio: you hate her Rio: she's Rio: a mess Buster: It won't Buster: But at least I'll have tried instead of just giving up Buster: Same as how I tried to tell her its a bad idea to have this kid Rio: This is fucked Rio: she can't be a mum Buster: I know Buster: But maybe it won't be my kid and she won't be my problem either Rio: Yeah but maybe it will Buster: Well it's not like I can sub you in to be the kid's mum instead Rio: Shut up Rio: How is she so stupid Rio: Jesus fucking Christ Buster: How am I? Buster: It is what it is Rio: Why isn't she on the pill Rio: who isn't in this day and age it ain't hard Buster: Feel free to hit her up and ask Buster: She's very keen to be your friend anyway, like Rio: What? Buster: [Sends the Rio related relevant screenshots] Buster: We had a great chat Rio: She's Buster: I know Rio: Are you sure she's even pregnant Rio: she isn't taking this seriously Buster: I'm not sure of anything Buster: I don't even know if I actually fucked her so Rio: This is Rio: This is the worst thing that could've happened to you Buster: Tell me something I don't know, babe Rio: I can't Buster: Do you get now why I need you to fuck off Rio: No Rio: not really Buster: It's too much Buster: I can't do this Rio: That's not fair Buster: None of this is fair Buster: Or part of the plan Rio: so everything has to go to shit Rio: fine Buster: It already has Buster: Don't act like you're fine with having her around forever Buster: I have to be stuck with her, you don't Rio: Sounds like you've decided for me Buster: I can't do that Rio: You have though Rio: I've got the message Buster: Babe Rio: What Rio: I'm fucking off Buster: I'm sorry Buster: I just need you to know that before you go, okay Rio: No you don't and no you aren't Rio: because I didn't want to go and you aren't stopping me so Buster: You think I want you to go? Rio: You don't know what you want Rio: I didn't think that extended to me but it is what it is, yeah? Buster: Don't Buster: Of course I want you Buster: I'm just trying not to be a selfish cunt for once Buster: Isn't it hard enough doing this without all this bullshit added? Rio: It doesn't suit you Buster: Yeah, well, it's gonna have to start Buster: I can't be a selfish cunt with a kid, can I Buster: Time to change my suit, babe Rio: Good luck, Buster Buster: Rio, come on Buster: I don't want to leave it like this Rio: You're right though Rio: You have to Buster: But Rio: You know what you've got to do Rio: What is there to say? Buster: I love you Rio: I love you Buster: Don't go Rio: Nancy will be back with your parents in a minute Buster: I don't care Rio: I can't stand in the way of you doing the right thing can I Buster: Us being together is the right thing Buster: We both know that Rio: I don't think she'll agree Buster: She doesn't get a say in it Rio: What about your kid Buster: If it's mine, it's mine Buster: She can't change that if she decides she wishes it wasn't Rio: But it's not fair to put this shit on it Rio: there will already be enough from the situation with her Rio: never mind adding this Buster: I know but she's already ruined so much Buster: I can't just let her take everything Buster: I don't get to go to America and I don't get to be with you either Buster: Fuck that Rio: I know Rio: It's fucked and I really am sorry Rio: it's just fucked Buster: It's only fucked 'cause I fucked it all up Buster: You don't need to be sorry Rio: It wasn't even you that's the worst part Rio: I can't be angry because it was so wrong and weird and horrible Buster: You can be angry at me for going out and getting in that state though. I am Rio: It won't change that it happened, and it definitely won't change that there's going to be a kid Buster: Nothing will Buster: Not how much I don't want it or how much I want you Rio: No Rio: I know Buster: You still get to react to it how you want Rio: I don't want to be angry Rio: I'm tired of it Rio: I wanted to be with you Buster: So come upstairs Buster: Be with me Rio: No Rio: I can't Buster: Why not? Rio: Because you're only doing it because you don't want to think about this anymore Rio: and I can't deal with knowing that Buster: I want you to stay 'cause I love you Rio: Your parents are going to be here soon and you're going to have to tell them Rio: One thing at a time, yeah Buster: I can't tell them while Nance is here Buster: Let's just both go and I'll do it later Rio: Better she hears it from you than her Rio: though yeah, it's going to be fucking awful Buster: She won't say anything, her parents don't even know yet Rio: You suddenly trust her? Buster: She seemed actually bothered about that Rio: Well who wants to tell their parents they're knocked up Rio: not even a boyfriend in sight Buster: She wants me to tell them with her Buster: I said I would Rio: Jesus Christ, Buster Rio: Why don't you just marry her Buster: Don't Buster: I couldn't say no, she asked me and it's not like I wanna tell mine Buster: I'd love to have someone in my corner for it, like Rio: Yes you could Rio: You aren't together, that's such a ridiculous thing to ask Rio: what kind of message do you think it sends to her and her 'rents when you wanna show up all honourable fuck's sake Buster: I was just trying to help Buster: I thought she was scared about it Rio: More fool you Rio: Honestly Buster: I'm an idiot, alright Buster: Whatever Buster: I'm not saying I handled any of the convo well Rio: Because it was a fucking farce Rio: she's probably faking it Rio: who just drops it into a text conversation Rio: I don't buy it Buster: Me either honestly Buster: But we'll see what she comes back with evidence wise Buster: Shopping bags of Baby Gucci don't count, unfortunately Rio: Of course she has Rio: Stupid fucking girl Buster joined the chat 3 hours ago Buster: Like, the levels at which she is not taking this seriously or understanding how fucked any of this is Rio: It's concerning Rio: Maybe her parents will make her Rio: at least you can make sure she tells them if you're there I guess Buster: I mean, I know you don't think it's a good idea but I can also be there to correct any bullshit she tries to say to them Buster: I wouldn't be surprised if she says we're together, you know Rio: Well yeah, that's why she wants you there Rio: so it doesn't look like just a party hookup Buster: What the fuck am I actually gonna do, babe Rio: I don't know Rio: All I know is, you've got what, 8 months, 'til it's actually here so Buster: I'll say that for her, she's given me plenty of warning Rio: You know, hit you up for those push presents Rio: Fucking hell Buster: Don't Rio: I'm not laughing at you but Jesus if I don't Buster: I need a fucking drink Buster: Come with me Rio: Alright, I'll drive you Rio: I'll have to text your sister you know Rio: they'll be worried, more than they are already Buster: I'll do it Buster: I've gotta say sorry for how many times I told her to fuck off etc Buster: Should probably invite them all for drinks 'cause they're gonna need it but Rio: Okay Rio: Proud of you Buster: Don't Buster: I can't start laughing right now I don't trust it Rio: Let's just get you that drink then Buster: I'm not trying to drink alone and be that level of sad cunt, cheers Buster: I'll get us a cab Buster: Leave your car there Rio: Alright Rio: but I don't trust getting wasted Buster: Alright Buster: It's not like I can anyway, I'm gonna have to face the fam at some point Buster: Not as if I can just fly back without talking to them now Rio: Not really Buster: I need to stay here for a while Buster: I literally can't see Chlo until I calm down Buster: She's gone to a party tonight so Rio: Will they let you? Buster: They can't stop me Buster: But once I explain, they'll probably agree it's a good idea Rio: Once they see your room, like Buster: Don't take the piss out of me Rio: I'm not Rio: It's real Buster: Yeah Rio: Have you hurt yourself? Buster: I'm sure I would have noticed by now Rio: Let me come up and check Buster: I'll come down to you. You don't need to be dealing with this mess along with all the others Buster: If I leave a blood trail we'll know what's up, like Rio: Not funny Buster: You don't need to worry about me, babe Rio: That's a lie Buster: I'm alright, I promise Rio: Don't Buster: See for yourself Rio: That's not what I mean Buster: I know, but what can I say? Rio: Nothing if you're not going to be real Buster: Rio, come on Buster: Give me a break, will you? Rio: Seriously? Buster: Yeah, seriously Rio: Fuck off Rio: seriously Buster: Don't start Buster: Let's just go Rio: You go Buster: Babe Buster: Stop Buster: I don't need this from you right now, yeah? Rio: Oh, I'm sorry Buster: Why are you being like this? Rio: Don't be stupid Rio: just come on Buster: How am I being stupid, asking a fucking question? Buster: Just talk to me Rio: I'm fucking heartbroken, Buster Rio: and I don't know how to deal with any of this so give me a break too, alright Buster: I'm sorry Buster: I know, okay, this is so fucked Rio: I know you are Buster: Please don't go Rio: I won't Rio: I'm not Buster: I love you so much Rio: I know Rio: and I love you Rio: but you know that this is going to end it right Buster: Don't say that Rio: Even if we don't talk about it Buster: If you wanna end it then you end it Buster: Otherwise no Buster: It won't Rio: You can say that now Rio: but when the kid's here Buster: What? You think I'm gonna leave you Buster: How does that work? Rio: Because we don't get to work in the real world Buster: Shut up Buster: You don't know that Rio: I just know Rio: You're not going to want to explain it or deal with the backlash, when you've already got all that to contend with Buster: Fuck that, you're guessing Buster: And fuck you if you think I can't handle that Buster: I've gotta tell them about this kid, I want to tell them about you. It's different Rio: I don't want to make your life any harder Buster: You're the only one who doesn't do that Buster: I need you. Don't you know that? Buster: Everything will only be harder without you Rio: You're going to be a Dad Buster: If you wanna use this as your out, I can't blame you Rio: Don't say it like that Rio: I don't want an out, it's not like this is the perfect opportunity for me, fuck off Buster: It is though Buster: Then we don't have to tell your fam, I know you don't wanna do it anyway Rio: Just because I don't want to rush it Rio: Why is it so bad to keep things private Buster: It's not private, it's secret Rio: It had to be Buster: Says you but that doesn't mean I have to want to keep it like that Rio: Well, it's beside the point now isn't it Buster: No Rio: You've got so much more you have to focus on now Buster: I've always had a lot going on Buster: Find a better excuse, babe Rio: Exactly, it isn't just this kid Rio: it's school, all that Buster: It's hard, yeah, it'll get harder Buster: But I'm not just giving up Rio: Babe Buster: Do what you've gotta do Buster: I can't be mad about it Rio: Don't expect me to decide right now Buster: I'm not Buster: I don't have a fucking clue what I'm doing right now apart from losing my shit Rio: Sounds about right Rio: not like you were gonna cry with joy Buster: not like anyone is Buster: Chlo can bullshit all she likes but none of this was planned or how she really wants it Rio: Well, it's happening regardless so Rio: we'll all have to get used to it Buster: Yeah Rio: Cab's here Buster: Alright Buster: Are you still coming? Rio: Yeah Rio: Said I'd keep an eye on you Buster: Where are we going? Buster: The fewer people I have to see the better for them Buster: And us Rio: Don't worry, I know a place Buster: Good