#onion girl

[lockedtombmemes]

[the-bot-marg0t]

Heres the vid of me devouring a onion

All of you bask in the gloriousness of my allium munching skill!!!

[catinakimono]

I can’t explain it but she looks like an onion to me… silly little onion girl

[thehumanwiki]

pokémon but with onion headlines badly edited on it once again

Part 1, Part 2

[benoits-neckerchieves]

Think I’ve finally figured out why Daniel Craig is trending

This image has become a meme in comparing him to a banker / accountant / antiques dealer / European MP, university professor etc etc (whilst also acknowledging the sexiness ofc)

Why does he keep accidentally creating viral memes and he doesn’t even know 😭😭

[cepalliumtm]

Thinking of a yandere competent maid and her sweet duchess reader~

Basically, after escaping your family through a loveless marriage, you’ve expected the worst from your husband: being neglectful within the duchy and even having a couple of mistresses behind your back. You figured as long as you live a life distant from him, it would be easy for you to prevent any more mistreatment from the staff and his family when coming to visit.

Yan maid would be one of the first of the manor to introduce herself to you. Unlike most of the other maids she seems competent at her job, holding loyalty to the duchy which includes the new mistress of the house. She found you beautiful although powerless in the face of your husband. She was tasked to be in charge of taking care of you, making sure your life is secure whilst married to the duke.

It was surprising how much… affection? respect? yan maid gave you, considering that the other maids weren’t exactly fond of you. The estate was filled with plants from the other families, waiting for you to slip up and fall into despair so they can replace you with a more… deserving candidate to be by his side. But yan maid wasn’t like the others. She went above and beyond to ensure your safety; she tested your food before serving it to you, kept a watchful eye when guiding you around the estate, and had such helpful advice to maintain somewhat friendly relations with your husband. It seems that out of everyone around her, despite her rather cold demeanor, there was a subtle kindness coming from her. You were very thankful for it.

Yan maid was also in charge of furthering your status as the duchess: teaching you the duties that come with the role. She was patient; any repeated mistakes that would easily irk off any other tutor would be corrected in a calm manner, she’d never raise your voice when you’ve done something wrong. She praised your intelligence despite your naivety and reminded you to hold your head up in the face of the men that would put you down.

Over the next couple of months, she would guide you into the perfect duchess, one that anyone would be proud of.

And within those couple of months, the fleeting (and rather shallow) affection she held for you the moment you arrived would blossom into something deeper, something special. Since yan maid was your main caretaker, eventually you’d become more comfortable around her to say what’s on your mind. And what was once the image of just a beautiful woman easily transformed into an intelligent being capable of thought and emotion. You’d come to her mainly for advice, asking about mundane things like some of your husband’s likes and dislikes, or embroidering techniques, etc.

Through these little conversations she began to fall deeper for you, wanting to hear more of your voice, wanting to see you more in those frilly little dresses. The Duke may be funding your lifestyle, but she was the one that arranged everything. Anything to ensure your happiness she’d do.

In fact, yan maid would gloat about how she easily was the most important person in your life, above anyone else, even above the duke she initially was supposed to be loyal towards.

And yan maid is aware of the danger imposed upon you. As a result, she would put herself in charge of protecting you when no other would, she wasn’t afraid to spill blood in your name. On the days when you’re especially frightened, paranoid from a possible assassination attempt, yan maid would knock on the door, ready to provide you with the love and comfort your neglectful husband couldn’t.

Hell, if one day you come crying to her, saying you’ve had enough, that you want to run away, she would be the one to arrange everything. She'd wipe the slate clean, all the paperwork would be handled, and it's not like anyone else would miss you. Just promise her that you’d take her with you because she wouldn’t want to leave you alone.

Sorry about the dip in quality, i haven't really written anything like this. But I wanted something quick out before tomorrow, just because now I know that people are actually reading my shtuff. Enjoy lol

[waterloggedsoliloquy]

Revolutionary Girl Utena as Onion headlines 15/?

[belderchal]

Red onion girl? Inspired by this post

Timelapse [15 sec]

[thefrsers]

THEYYYYYY😭😭😭

[starrysharks]

trixie!

[salmonfry4]

tom kenny the man you are

[momyolalatityantan]

インフィニティミク/png

[saevity]

cordelia bc i missed drawing her <3 can't believe this is the first time i've drawn her in a gibson girl(-ish) hairstyle, edwardian hairstyles are so fun

[chaossuta]

my freaky bbgirl 💚

[cepalliumtm]

Held in Captivity

yandere!empress x princess!reader

The aftermath of a fallen kingdom being subsumed by a massive empire ruled by a woman known for her cruelty and absolute desire for obedience.

tw: yandere tendencies, slight Stockholm syndrome, no use of (y/n), obsession, age gap, captivity (reader is held hostage), slightly implied sexual content (but nothing explicit)

————————╰ ─┉─¡! • !¡─┉─ ╯————————

"You'd think that after everything you've been through, you would know better than to trust your old kingdom."

Necrisir holds on tightly to her prize, a small pathetic princess lying in her lap enjoying her gentle and soothing caresses. She's careful not to let any of her claws scratch your cheek as she rubs your head, almost as if she's trying to lull you to sleep.

You already know what this is, and you promised yourself you wouldn't fall for her temptations. But it's getting oh so much harder, especially when you're considered the damsel in distress in this situation.

She continues her speech, her voice almost slurring the words out, almost as if she's trying to calm herself down. "It’s pretty pathetic that they think they can resist my orders. I've been living many years princess, you should know this. I'm… quite hard to kill." She chuckles at your sweet hums and moans, you not wanting to let her know you're enjoying her touch. "But I guess their stubbornness will be their downfall, and once they realize that my armies outnumber them, they'll give me what I want."

As much as you want to struggle, the fact that you're essentially taken hostage and thus, a liability, you know that there isn't much point. You don't want to hear about her plans for your kingdom, the kingdom you knew did not care for you. The royalty there were no more different from her, using others for their own gain. At least she's blunt about her plans of assimilation.

And at least she's giving you the illusion of a paradise within the walls of the palace.

You still want to plead for their freedom, hoping that whatever she does with them, your people would still be able to live their lives, to work freely, among other things. But all you can do is listen to the almost horrendous plans she has for them. After all, she's not known for showing mercy to her enemies. Especially those that has offended her so far.

However, the empress does notice a slight movement coming from you. You became uncomfortable in your position, and wanting to turn around. Your head almost feels numb.

"Ah, princess," she coos, giving you the kindest of gazes. You can hear the sweetness laced in her tone, her breath almost tickling your ears as she speaks. "Don't move. I rather enjoy you like this, all docile for me."

You still slightly squirm, wanting to sit up. It's hateful how pathetic you've become, nothing but a prize that she has taken for herself.

"My dear, is it really that bad?" She gently lifts your head up so now it's resting against her broad shoulders. "Perhaps it was wrong to cast that spell on you. Well since you've been an obedient little girl I suppose you may be rewarded with the ability to speak." She presses a finger to your lips, the block in your throat almost dissipating to nothing. It's like you can properly breathe now.

"Oh, Sun of the land," you say clearly, your voice raspy and unpolished. Makes sense, you've been forbidden from speaking for at least a week. "I do have one question I'd like to ask."

She nearly revels at the sight of your huddled up form next to her, bravely speaking out the words even though she can tell that you're nervous. "Well, do tell me my flower."

"I was wondering what would happen to my kingdom once you… take care of things."

"Our kingdom my dear, our kingdom." She smiles and kisses your head. "And I'm pretty sure I know what to do with it. Once they give it up I will make it prosper, better than what it is before. All the suffering, all the pain will be taken away. Can't you see that I'm doing a good thing for your people? Of course, they will have to assimilate into the empire. That is an unfortunate thing."

You shrug your shoulders, at least she's being reasonable. It probably means though because they are essentially her prisoners, assimilating quietly would mean deeming them as lesser than citizens. And as much as you hate it for your people, the alternative was her destroying everything you hold dear.

"My flower, we will begin preparations immediately as soon as we're able. Of course, due to the assimilation process taking so long most of their affairs will be taken over by my troops, but as long as they take the proper measures to fully accept and become loyal to my empire they will slowly earn everything back tenfold. I am a fair and just ruler, isn't that right?"

"But," the lingering question remains on your tongue. "What will become of my family?"

She huffs, but answers it bluntly. "Your family has committed treason, my flower. They shall be put to death the day they do what is best for the kingdom. You must understand…" She faces towards you, her gentle but firm caress pulling you upwards so you can meet her eyes. "This is simply the punishment for not settling the conflict peacefully."

The thought of it terrifies you. Knowing that you only have a limited time before you can see any of your family again would tear you apart. And despite her seeming infatuation with you it can easily turn into the same punishment they will go through.

"You needn't worry about yourself however," she notes, knowing the horrid thoughts going through your head. "I would never, ever do that to my flower. You are simply precious, perfect for me. As long as you don't betray me I would never hurt a hair on your little pretty head." She kisses your head again, wrapping her arms around you and holding you close. "Don't forget that they gave you to me. The moment you stepped foot in this palace is the day you became mine. I know you don't see it darling, but I will do almost anything to make sure you realize that. You are free under my influence, safe within my arms, and belonging to my kingdom. Do you understand that?"

You gulp, knowing the undertone beneath those words: ever try to escape me darling and I will hunt you down and bring you back to me.

"O-of course, sun of the land."

She giggles at your sweet title. "My dear, I'd prefer if you call me by name."

You don't say another word, a mental block (this time from within) preventing you from speaking once more.

She sighs, closing her eyes as she gives you a quick squeeze. "It's okay, we'll slowly get there." You settle into her arms, eyelids growing heavier as she continues to soothe you with her touch. Her words continue to unsettle you, whispering promises of love and loyalty. "I know one day you'll willingly stay by my side, become completely mine, come to love me as much I do you."

And the worst part of it is, you're slowly starting to believe them.

a/n: tbh, this is more of a test. I never thought that I would post this out in the open, but here I am, posting it anyway.

[waterloggedsoliloquy]

Utena as Onion Headlines, 3/?