#one of the greatest joys of my life is every single day when i don’t watch bbc merlin episode one. seriously

[livvyofthelake]

bbc merlin commentary time <3

[p0orbaby]

We Can Stay Here, Spend Every Day Here

summary: barcelona win the champions league

warnings: none

a/n: thanks for sending in a Request

word count: 1k

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The final whistle blows, and the stadium erupts like a shaken bottle of cava. People are screaming, crying, jumping like they’ve just been told they’re getting a lifetime supply of jamón. Barcelona’s just won the Champions League, and you’re there in the thick of it, standing on the sidelines like a stunned meerkat, absorbing the whole chaotic spectacle.

You see Alexia. She’s standing on the pitch, breathing hard, looking like she’s just wrestled a lion. Her hair’s stuck to her face in sweaty strands, but she’s beaming, a look of pure, unfiltered joy that probably hasn’t graced her face since the day she found out croquetas were a thing. She’s surrounded by her teammates, who are mobbing each other, doing that thing where they all scream “Let’s go!” even though they’ve just gone and won the damn thing.

Alexia’s eyes dart around the stadium, trying to soak in everything at once, like she’s worried she might miss a single drop of this euphoria. It’s that moment when you realise she’s not just a footballer, she’s also a sentient human sponge.

But then you notice it. The way her shoulders slump a little, how the corners of her mouth twitch as if they’re debating whether to keep smiling or just fall off her face altogether. You can almost hear the monologue running through her head, like: “Am I dreaming? Did I leave the oven on? Is that tear in my eye or did a pigeon just shit on me?” The existential dread of it all hits her at once—she’s just achieved one of her life’s greatest goals, again, and yet… what now?

It’s all too much. You can see it in the way she starts blinking furiously, like her eyeballs are allergic to victory. The next thing you know, her chest is heaving, and her breath’s catching, and you’re thinking, Oh, Christ, she’s about to go full Niagara Falls.

You’ve never seen Alexia cry. You’ve seen her stub her toe on a chair leg and swear in Catalan that would make even Gerard Piqué blush, but cry? This is uncharted territory. It’s like watching a unicorn sprout wings. It’s so rare, you almost want to pull out your phone and film it for posterity, but you figure that might be a bit much, even for you.

Instead, you just stand there, paralysed with awkwardness, trying to figure out how to comfort the world’s greatest footballer without making a complete tit of yourself. Do you pat her back? Offer her a tissue? Do that weird side-hug thing where you don’t know what to do with your arms?

No, no. You do the only thing that seems right in this absurd moment—you just walk up to her and stand there, like a total muppet, until she finally notices you.

“Y/N?” Alexia blinks at you, her eyes glistening like she’s either about to cry or ask you to help her find a lost contact lens.

You open your mouth to say something profound, like, “You did it!” but all that comes out is a croak that sounds suspiciously like a bullfrog who’s just stubbed his toe on a lily pad.

“Hold me,” Alexia suddenly blurts out, her voice barely a whisper.

You freeze. Hold her? Alexia Putellas, the most un-holdable person you know, is asking you to hold her? That’s like Messi asking you to tie his shoelaces or Ronaldo admitting he’s bad at something—utterly inconceivable.

But then again, she’s standing there, looking at you like you’re her last line of defence, and, well, what the hell else are you supposed to do?

So you awkwardly shuffle closer, your arms hovering in the air like you’re about to hug a cactus, and then, with all the finesse of a drunk giraffe, you wrap your arms around her.

And she just melts. Not like the Wicked Witch of the West—more like an ice cream in the sun, all warmth and sweetness and, honestly, a little sticky from the sweat. Her head drops onto your shoulder, and you can feel her trembling slightly, her breath hot against your neck.

“Wow,” you mumble into her hair, which smells like some fancy shampoo you can’t pronounce but secretly wish you could afford. “You’re really, uh, hugging me”

“Shut up,” Alexia mutters into your shoulder, but there’s no venom in it. She’s smiling again—at least, you think she is, though it’s hard to tell when your face is smushed into her neck like you’re trying to get a good whiff of her collarbone.

You stand there, holding Alexia in the middle of the pitch, while her teammates continue to celebrate around you. Pina is dancing like she’s auditioning for So You Think You Can Dance: Champions League Edition, and Mapi’s screaming something in Spanish that’s probably either very inspiring or incredibly inappropriate, maybe both.

You feel Alexia’s shoulders shake with laughter, though you’re not sure if she’s laughing at you, with you, or because she’s just realised how utterly bizarre this whole situation is. Probably all three.

“You okay?” you ask, because you’re not sure what else to say when you’re holding the greatest footballer in the world while she tries not to dissolve into a puddle of emotions.

“Yeah,” she breathes out, her voice soft, almost tender. “I’m just… It’s just… a lot”

“Yeah,” you say, nodding sagely, like you totally understand what it’s like to win the Champions League and have an entire nation screaming your name. “Winning’s hard”

Alexia snorts—a real, honest-to-God snort that makes you laugh, which makes her laugh, which then makes you both laugh even harder until you’re both giggling like a couple of idiots who’ve just been told they’re getting the last slice of pizza.

And for a moment, you forget that you’re standing in the middle of a stadium filled with thousands of people, that you’re holding Alexia Putellas like she’s some kind of cuddly footballing teddy bear, and that you’re probably the most absurd couple on the planet.

You just laugh, and she holds you, and you both stand there like two complete goofs, surrounded by the chaos of victory, soaking it all in, and not giving a damn about what anyone else thinks.

[the-peak-tmnt]

Hey The Neon Void readers, quick update from the author's sister!

(art commission by @kaysdenofchaos)

Hi readers of The Neon Void fanfic. This is the author’s older sister. She’s been getting a lot of fan art and asks lately. She’s sent me screenshots of a few unanswered ones looking for advice on how to respond.

While all the love and support of TNV is genuinely appreciated, my sister @sugarpasteltmnt is not equipped to respond to a small handful of these asks/comments that are, quite frankly, inappropriate.

Sugarpastels is not a therapist, and she’s certainly not an internet stranger’s therapist.

She’s an adult with an extremely demanding and stressful job for a very large client. Some of you have already experienced and enjoyed her work IRL without knowing it. Her company is close to finishing another project that will bring a lot of joy to hundreds of thousands of people every year, but working on a project of that scale is extremely stressful.

She is writing this fanfic for fun. TNV is a way for her to decompress and put her creative energy towards something other than work.

What’s not fun is coming home to asks/comments from readers who are projecting their own struggles/mental health onto TNV, and even Sugarpastels herself, and demanding some sort of attention from her over it.

Let’s be real: it’s fun to watch our blorbos suffer! So much of fandom is just us putting our favorite characters in Situations because it’s fun. Simple as that. But I think another reason TNV has resonated so strongly with readers is because of the way Sugarpastels writes the internal struggles of these characters.

We are both aware that TNV deals with mental health topics. Since the early days of “modern” fandom, fanfiction has been a way for people to explore complicated, difficult and sometimes even taboo subjects. There’s no shortage of complex feelings being explored in TNV, which is why we’re all having so much fun reading it.

But that’s all it is; an exploration. Sugarpastels is not a mental health expert. I’ve read a handful of books on PTSD and mindfulness for research while writing my own fanfic, and I would never consider myself prepared to help someone else.

It’s okay if you relate to things from TNV. I know I do! Again, fanfic has always been a way to read about things rarely dealt with (or handled poorly) in published fiction/tv shows/movies. I will always argue one of the greatest things about fanfiction and other fanworks is being able to see ourselves and our own struggles through our favorite fictional characters.

But Sugarpastels is not a fictional character. She’s a real person. Most importantly (to me at least) she’s my little sister, and this big sister cannot handle watching some of her readers expect more of her than is appropriate.

So I’m asking you to please be mindful of what you ask/say to not just her, but literally everyone on the internet. Unless you’re chatting with someone regularly, they do not know you. Whether it’s friends, family, teachers, coaches, etc, there are people in your life who know you personally, and are therefore better equipped to help you than a stranger on the internet.

Sugarpastels is so full of empathy that it’s hard to not feel for you when you send things like this. But it just isn’t fair to put that kind of unnecessary pressure on someone who is, at the end of the day, just trying to have some fun writing about ninja turtles bein’ sad.

(That being said, PLEASE DON’T BE SCARED TO SEND HER ASKS AND FAN ART!!! They make her day every single time and are seriously so, so appreciated. She’s texting me about it constantly how much she loves all of TNV’s readers. This whole post is really directed at an extremely small percentage of her readers, but there have been enough I felt something needed to be said.)

[kiyosato-yuri]

something about Ryōshū and Yoshihide

[might be a bit offensive, most is personal thought about Yoshihide and how PM build Ryōshū at the moment]

As someone who love Ryōshū, me and my friend wanted to make this post

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

In Jigoku hen (Hell’s Screen), Yoshihide is a peculiar, arrogant, and conceited painter who looks down on all rules and traditions. He’s someone who cast away the Five Constants 五常 ( 義 justice, 禮 politeness, 智 wisdom, 信 fidelity and 仁 benevolence) to pursue art.

「あゝ、これでございます、これを描く為めに、あの恐ろしい出来事が起つたのでございます。又さもなければ如何に良秀でもどうしてかやうに生々と奈落の苦艱が画かれませう。

あの男はこの屏風の絵を仕上げた代りに、命さへも捨てるやうな、無惨な目に出遇ひました。云はゞこの絵の地獄は、本朝第一の絵師良秀が、自分で何時か墜ちて行く地獄だつたのでございます.... 。」

“It was for this reason, indeed, his consuming desire to paint this picture, that the terrible incident occurred. If it had not been for this event, how could even Yoshihide have succeeded in painting that graphic picture of the tortures and agonies in Hell? 

So, he could complete the picture, his life had to come to a miserable end. Indeed, it was to this very Hell in his picture, that Yoshihide, the greatest painter in Japan, had condemned himself.”

In the game, Ryōshū is depicted almost exactly the same way, if not more explicitly deranged than the original. There are numerous moments in the game that describe her eyes lighting up when she starts “painting” or marveling at piles of [censored] meats while exclaiming in delight.

You don’t even have to look so far—just read the uptie story of Warp Corp. Ryōshū. It vividly portrays her happiness and joy in cleaning up the hellscape created by centuries of despair-driven madness. I'll even quote here

"I get to visit a museum, an exhibition featuring brand-new pieces of art every single day. All that for a bit of physical labor." "When this train that people take without giving it a second thought, every single day...Turned out to be a gallery of arts, sculpted with chisels of time! While I was impressed with how well they were hiding this truth from the public... three words came to mind. This. Is. It.

" In hindsight, I was so absorbed with chasing after and creating my own art "

"One that wrapped its flesh around the plush side of the seat, embodying a new chair with extra cushioning...One that is an amalgam of many, taking the shape of a new organism and lurching on... Though I wouldn't classify that as 'art'. Not yet."

"Shambling without intent is… in the end, insufficient to be called art. It is incomplete at best. I butcher them. Because the company ordered me to make them easier to clean up. To interfere with the process of involuntary art isn't to my liking, no… But that doesn't happen very often. Besides, there is plenty to be gained from the rest."

If that’s doesn't prove much, in the opening moments of the game, she’s visibly enjoying watching people get tossed into a bus to be crushed into fuel, while Sinclair is terrified, and Dante is questioning the morality of what’s happening.

With such evidence, there’s no way to claim her sadistic tendencies are just a façade or mask—it’s her bare essence. And that’s without even touching on her masochistic tendencies, which honestly make Yoshihide seem tame in comparison when it comes to twisted and warped personalities.

Ryōshū and Yoshihide are both artists consumed by blind, inescapable devotion to their craft. They are the kind of people who would willingly open the gates of hell and hurl themselves inside. They are also inevitably doomed to fall into Avīci Hell.

And as for being sad? Was Jigoku hen supposed to be a tragic tale of a father losing his daughter? Was Yoshihide meant to be a character that evokes sympathy for his suffering? Absolutely and definitely not.

Yoshihide himself opened the gates of hell and threw himself in—no one pushed him. He discarded the Five Constants and trampled over human lives in the name of art.

「檳榔毛の車にも火をかけよう。又その中にはあでやかな女を一人、上﨟のをさせて乗せて遣はさう。炎と黒煙とに攻められて、する、車―それを描かうと思ひついたのは、流石に天下第一の絵師ぢや。褒めてとらす。おゝ褒めてとらすぞ」

"A charming woman dressed up like a court lady shall ride in the carriage. Writhing amidst the deadly flames and black smoke, the lady in the carriage will die in agony. Your suggestion of finding such a model for your picture does you full credit as the greatest painter in the whole country. I praise you. I praise you highly."

What Yoshihide receives at the end of the story is the consequence of his own actions. In the end, he finishes painting the hellish screen—only after watching his beloved daughter burn alive before his eyes—and then hangs himself. The masterpiece he created was painted with the agony of witnessing his daughter’s death, and yet, just moments after despair, he finds joy and radiance in it. At his core, Yoshihide is still a painter who sacrifices goodness for the sake of beauty.

He’s no different from his original inspiration, Ryōshū in Uji Shūi Monogatari (Tales of a Rainy Night), who took delight in watching his house burn, his wife and children still inside. Akutagawa’s addition of a sense of love and grief in Yoshihide is a form of punishment—because while the original Ryōshū lost his humanity, Yoshihide still feels pain, which haunts him after completing his masterpiece.

「その火の柱を前にして、凝り固まつたやうに立つてゐる良秀は― 何と云ふ不思議な事でございませう。あのさつきまで地獄の責苦に悩んでゐたやうな良秀は 、今は云ひやうのない輝きを、さながら恍惚とした法悦の輝きを、皺だらけな満面に浮べながら、大殿様の御前も忘れたのか、両腕をしつかり胸に組んで、佇んでゐるではございませんか。

それがどうもあの男の眼の中には、娘の悶え死ぬ有様が映つてゐないやうなのでございます。唯美しい火焔の色と、その中に苦しむ女人の姿とが、限りなく心を悦ばせる― さう云ふ景色に見えました。」

"In front of the pillar of fire, Yoshihide stood still, rooted to the ground. What a wonderful transfiguration he had undergone! A mysterious radiance, a kind of blissful ecstasy, showed on the wrinkled face of Yoshihide who had been agonized by the tortures of hell until a minute before.

His arms were tightly crossed on his chest as if he had forgotten that he was in the presence of the Grand Lord. No longer did his eyes seem to mirror the image of his daughter's agonized death. His eyes seemed to delight beyond measure in the beautiful color of the flame and the form of the woman writhing in her last infernal tortures."

Because of how Jigoku hen is written, readers are left with the impression that “Yoshihide, despite his twisted nature, still has humanity.” But they forget how much pleasure he took in watching his daughter burn. Now they project what they read onto Ryōshū… even though the game hasn’t explored her backstory? So far, the game hasn’t dropped a single hint about Ryōshū’s backstory. She remains one of the most mysterious sinners on the bus. None of the uptie stories for her IDs provide even a shred of evidence that she’s secretly melancholic like Gregor.

What we can confirm is that she cherishes her sword, has some connection to the Five Fingers, and always speaks up when the topic of family comes up. Using the original work as a basis to interpret a character is fine but announcing your personal interpretation as fact while accusing others of not understanding the character is like running ahead of the car you're supposed to be riding.

Ryōshū, Sinner No. 4 of Limbus Company, is a violence-loving mystery of a character with shady connections, an artist who finds beauty in the grotesque. While this is not the entirety of her character, it is who she is. 

Ryōshū is Ryōshū—not Don Quixote or Rodion with a mask slapped on.

Liking her for her violent and twisted nature doesn’t make you a fool. It’s not the same as liking someone and then realizing the person you admired was merely putting on an act or presenting a beautiful façade. If PM later explores a more humanizing or empathetic aspect of Ryōshū, your reaction would likely be, “Oh, so Ryōshū still has humanity/she also has this side to her?” There might be some surprises, but it definitely wouldn’t feel like being deceived.

Even though I’m pretty sure most of the Ryōshū’s shrimp pond will continue simping for her because of her twisted nature as it is now. Either way, even if Ryōshū is shown to have humanity, she’ll still be Ryōshū—she’ll still turn people into a heap of [CENSORED] and call it art. That’s also how Akutagawa described Yoshihide up until the moment he ceased to live.

From start to finish, Yoshihide was always the blind painter single-mindedly pursuing his art, to the point that even his last shred of humanity couldn’t overcome his identity as an artist. As some analysts point out, the last remnants of Yoshihide’s humanity were burned away with the monkey that threw itself into the flames after his daughter.

「さうして朱塗のやうな袖格子がばらくと焼け落ちる中にのけ反つた娘の肩を抱いて、帛を裂くやうな鋭い声を、何とも云へず苦しさうに、長く煙の外へ飛ばせました。続いて又、二声三声 ― 私たちは我知らず、あつと同音に叫びました。

壁代のやうな焔を後にして、娘の肩に縋つてゐるのは、堀河の御邸に繋いであつた、あの良秀と諢名のある猿だつたのでございますから。その猿が何処をどうしてこの御所まで、忍んで来たか、それは勿論誰にもわかりません。」

“Amidst the burned crimson-lacquered lattice which was crumbling in pieces, it put it hands on the warped shoulders of the girl, and gave, out of the screens of black smoke, a long and piercing shriek of intense grief like the tearing of silk, then again two or three successive screams. Involuntarily we gave a unanimous outcry of surprise. 

What was holding fast to the shoulders of the dead girl, with the red curtain of blazing flames behind it, was the monkey, which went by the nickname of Yoshihide at the mansion of Horikawa.”

That would be Ryoshu, following the original Yoshihide's portrayal most closely—not some tragic, repressed character. As for how Project Moon plans to cook her up, only they know. They’re keeping it under wraps, so no player can analyze her in depth just yet. What if they decide to make her a fusion dance of the lord, the painter, and the daughter?

For those who like Ryoshu because she’s a handsome, domineering figure—well, lucky you, no worries there.

[leveloneandup]

For Christen Press, the Joy is in the Journey

Progress isn’t perfect.

That’s been Christen Press’s motto over the 781 days since she last played in a soccer match—and not just when it comes to her recovery from the ACL tear she sustained in June, 2022, but also when thinking about life as a whole.

“You have to accept that things won’t go the way you think they will, but maybe they’ll go better,” she explains. “Progress isn’t linear. It’s up and down and back and forth. But in that movement there’s more than what you ever imagined. So the imperfection—the struggle, the setbacks—those are actually the greatest gifts as you get to learn about yourself and you have the chance to grow.”

Press has had more than her share of setbacks over the last two years, as an initial surgery turned into two, then three, and finally four.

“I think every single time that I was told I’d have to have surgery, from the first ACL reconstruction and the three scopes that I had, I always thought I would be on the quickest timeline possible,” said Press when she returned to Angel City training in June. “I think that's part of who I am. I'm just relentlessly optimistic. I'm naively positive, and just thinking that everything's going to work out for me—and I never want that to change, you know? And I got off course of all of those timelines so many times that I finally had to actually relinquish that expectation of myself.”

In her two years off the field, Press says she’s grown and healed in more ways than just physically, but the goal was always to return, even if that possibility felt far off at times.

“I never thought about giving up,” says Press, “but there were moments that I thought I’d have to accept that I wouldn’t make it—or that ‘making it’ might not look how I expected.”

One of the hardest things about this process has been accepting that the outcome was not fully under her control. “I’m able to do a lot of suffering for success, and I’ve been that way since I was a child,” she says. “The question I had to answer was how to accept and be open to things I cannot control.”

Press had access to the best medical and rehabilitation care in the business—first at the Meyer Institute of Sports, an El Segundo rehab and performance facility specializing in elite athletes, and then with Angel City’s training staff, including VP of Medical and Performance Sarah Smith, Head Athletic Trainer Manny De Alba, Head of Sports Science Dan Jones, Director of Rehabilitation Sarah Neal, Performance Coach Michael Roman, Assistant Athletic Trainer April Seymon, and Senior Physical Therapist Joscelyn Shumate Bourne.

Ultimately, bodies don’t always heal the way we hope they will. All she could do was show up every day and try her best.

“I had to make decisions that centered my well being and full personhood,” she says. “To start to find my inherent value outside of excellence in the pitch.”

In part, that meant finding joy in other areas of life. She worked on her business, re–Inc, including starting a podcast with (business and life) partner Tobin Heath, initially focusing on the 2023 World Cup, then branching out to cover women’s soccer more generally. She went to the beach. She spent time with family.

In some ways, this time away from the game Press loves has been freeing. “The last two years have been the first of my career that I wasn’t evaluated on my performance,” she says. “I showed up for PT every day with a smile on my face and gave max effort. That’s all I had to do.”

Press’s return comes at a perfect time for the club: they’ve begun to build momentum with two convincing Summer Cup wins, against Club América and Bay FC, as they look ahead to the back half of the regular season. Playoffs are still well within reach heading into this stretch, a fact that Press’s return can only make more tangible.

“Her quality is inevitable,” says First Assistant Coach Eleri Earnshaw. “Last week in training, she scored a couple of goals that we haven't seen anyone else do yet this season in training.”

Returning to play after such a long hiatus isn’t easy for anyone, but Earnshaw says there’s a point the coaching staff have emphasized both to Press and to other injured players eyeing a return to the field: “your ability doesn't change overnight,” she says. “There are some things that just stay with you. Her chance creation, her separation from defenders—you’ve got to be in the right physical and mental place to be able to perform those things, to be confident to do it, but she is building those things up every day.”

“If we can get that quality onto the pitch for any number of minutes, great,” she concludes.

As Press anticipates her return to what she calls “the real world of professional sports”—one “filled with stress and pressure and often angst,” as she puts it—she’s going in with a fresh perspective.

“I’m determined to enjoy it,” she says. “I know who I am as a player and person, and I see this opportunity as a chance to do what I love. I told my teammates today: football is a miracle. It’s a miracle we get to do the thing we love.”

[pastelpaperplanes]

Has KnockOut ever been insecure of stretch marks given how he prides on his appearance? I’m sure Breakdown doesn’t mind them, though. Also, can Megatron feel anything with that tremendous scar on his back and how does Optimus react once he first saw it?

Knockout is definitely vain to a fault, always he was all the way back when he was still a nobel, this extends to not just his appearance but also his need to keep his snazzy clothes and armor in perfect condition, as well his bow pristine!

However, what he loves most in the world is the life he shares with Breakdown. The highs and lows they faced in life beyond the Autobot Kingdom, scars and scratches they earned along the way–all are memories of how hard they fought for their life together and how much they loved the fact that they got to fight and WIN for that love.

The marks he received in life since bonding Breakdown are met with pride! (Breakdown lets little get past him to hurt KO, that and Knockout is a mean shot with his bow, both are the other’s protectors! lol, scars received are few and far in between)

Knockout’s stretch marks from Wildbreak– his greatest gift from Breakdown, his greatest gift to the love of his life, are by far his proudest yet. They made that baby!!! And that is the greatest joy and challenge Knockout has ever faced, but the best part was that he got to face it with Breakdown.

Yes, and ofc Breakdown loves the marks. Obsessed w them even–they belong to his super strong, soft, and hot hubby

As for Megatron’s burn marks, nope he does not feel them much at all, the burns were very deep and fried a lot of his nerves. It wasn’t always that way of course, healing took. years.

Optimus has seen every single one of his scars. When asked, Megs would talk his audial off telling Op the stories of each proud mark. Some range from petty fights with his brother long ago, some from his time in the gladiator pits, others from dumb youthful decisions, he's a story book ready for Optimus to dive into, he only needs to ask.

His first reaction to seeing them was of course shock, but secondly he felt truly sick. Of course at Megs, nor the melted, glassy flash, but the fact that someone could do something like that to another person. Megatron has long since been used to that look of shock, those who have seen it rarely can school their features–he eased the situation with yet another story.

The largest scar, his burns, now that is the one that everytime he talks about it, Megs cooks up a whole new story to pair it with. Megatron’s favorites are “I feel asleep in a hot spring” or “Fireworks and High Grade don’t mix” and “You see my dear Sir Orion, there is a reason why I am not allowed in any kitchen ever again so long as I live”. Optimus doesn’t really wonder anymore. He knows all too well that some well placed humor is just a mask for the too painful of stories. He does know that he has never seen a ‘burn’ scar quite like Megatronus’

“In a great flash of light, the Allspark disappeared and Left King Ultra and Megatron gravely wounded…” so the stories go. Those in the battle rumor that Megatron made a scramble for the Allspark and the artifact lashed at the unworthy King of daring to filthy it with his hands, King Ultra being too close, sadly being burned as well in It’s rage.

Megatron has his own side of the story. Not that many beyond the few trusted of his People he’s shared it with know the truth, perhaps one day the little Knight may be ready.

[purple-ant]

IT'S WIP WEDNESDAY, MINES

here is a tiny snippet from the next chapter of my silly marriage au fic, Single Seers

“So...?”

“Yes, sorry,” Dooku slowed down to their previous walking pace and let go of Sifo-Dyas’s hand. “Servants. The first days the castle was empty, only a couple of droids left by Ramil, but Jenza was not happy with this way of things, so one day I returned from the city and was greeted by all these “my lord” and “your grace” from every corner.”

“You've dealt with servants before.” For a Jedi negotiator like Dooku, many missions involved luxurious houses and meetings, and they required maintenance.

“Yes, but not like that...” Dooku waved his hand, as if unable to convey the entire palette of emotions in words. “...Devotees. It is their honor and greatest joy to serve House Serenno, behavior that is familiar in other contexts of course, but has never been directed at me. And not within a month!”

Sifo-Dyas couldn't help but laugh as he saw Dooku get worked up, earning him an offended look.

“Laugh, laugh, I’ll ask you again after a week of “Mr” and “Sir” and “Will you allow me to accompany you every step of the way, sir, so that, Forebears forbid, you don’t need to do something yourself, sir?”

“Of course,” Sifo-Dyas smiled. “Should I also thank you for hiding information about my arrival?”

“Yes, believe me, none of us wants to find out how they imagine the future consort should be greeted.”

“Hah, I guess...” curiosity killed the loth-cat, but Sifo-Dyas felt that if he didn’t ask now, he would never be able to. “You know, you might not have waited for me to answer.”

“I wouldn’t even think of doing this without your consent!” Dooku was indignant, then frowned. “I’m not sure that this can even be done without the information and consent of the other party.”

“No, I’m talking about the call,” the seer’s smile twisted. “I bet there would be a line of nobles out the door if you had even mentioned that you were looking for a partner.”

“And I would spend the rest of my life listening to the Force, waiting for a stab in the back, or, even worse, watch their attempts to manipulate me,” the future count winced.

“Well, you would spend the rest of your life with me,” Sifo-Dyas did not know what emotions he put into these words. Something very similar to hope.

“And, you know, I don’t take my words lightly,” Dooku apparently wasn’t finished. “I still honor my knightly vows, even though my allegiance may no longer lie with the Order. Serenno and its people are my priority, and I intend to fulfill my every oath as a Count. Marriage will be no exception.”

Sifo-Dyas's heart stumbled, leaping to his throat and falling into his stomach, skipping a stop in his chest. He wanted to hit himself first for such a childish reaction, and then Dooku for such a choice of words.

“I had no doubt,” he managed.

“Seriously,” Dooku turned to Sifo-Dyas, and yes, there was not a hint of joke in his gaze when he looked into the eyes of the seer. “If I had to choose one person to spend the rest of my life with, sharing everything this world tries to throw our way, it would be you.”

[edgessunflower]

Love confession prompts

Divider credits to @romanthereigns

Actions

Confessing your love through a letter

Knowing their allergies and medical history while in the ER

Accidentally saying "I love you" while talking to on the phone

Pretending to be asleep while hearing how the other feels

Being drunk and accidentally spilling the truth about your feelings

Finding a playlist with your name they made of the songs that remind them of you

Caring for them when they are bedridden and sick

Going to where they met where their true feelings are revealed

Reuniting after time away only for your true feelings to spill out along with a kiss

Using a song both like to confess their feelings to each other

Sharing a kiss in the rain after getting stuck in the rain

Dancing at a party becoming focused only on each other

Hearing one tell a friend or family the truth about their feelings while the other hides around the corner listening

Childhood friends falling for each other after both return home

Realizing one loves the other while talking to the other's parents

Getting into an argument that leads to feelings being revealed

Dialogue

"I wouldn’t change a single thing about you, okay?"

"You are my world"

"Because- because I love you!"

"Life feels empty when I'm not around you"

"You take my breath away"

"Here, take it, it reminds me of you"

"I want to be more than just friends"

"Don't make me say it, I can't say the words"

"There isn't anything that I wouldn't do for you"

"Promise me you won't hate me?"

"You're everything to me"

"No one would ever love me..." "How do you know that someone doesn't already?" "Yeah who?" "Me"

"I know you feel the same"

"We've just met yet it feels like I have known you for a lifetime"

"Your smile brings me so much joy"

"When I fell for you, I realized I have never loved anyone like this before"

"This was not how I wanted you to find out, but I also don’t want to take it back"

"You will never lose me, I will always be right here beside you"

"It's hard for me to describe what I feel for you... but just know that it's love nonetheless"

"There is something missing, when you're not here with me"

"I want to wake up next to you every morning"

"How on earth do you expect me not to fall in love with you when you look and smile at me like that?"

"My heart skips a beat whenever I see you and I can never stop thinking about you even when you're right next to me"

"Look me in the eyes and tell me what you feel for me"

"The two of you were made for each other"

"We don't look or think about each other the way friends do"

"I can't pretend anymore"

"You're my favorite"

"Out of everyone, why me?" "Because no one else is you"

"My life without you would never be the same"

"After all that's happened over these last few years...I never stopped thinking about you"

"The only thing on my mind every moment of the day is you"

"Was it something I didn't say?"

"It's true...everything I said I meant"

"No one has ever loved me this way before" "Then let me show you what real love is"

"You deserve to know even if you don't think the same"

"Everyday with you is the greatest day of my life"

"All I want and need is you"

"I think..you’re my favourite person, there is no one I would rather be with right now or..ever"

"You know this feeling won't go away"

"What?" "Just glad I met you"

"God...you still look the same after all this time"

"Do I get to say thank you this time?"

"It's you, it's always been you"

"Maybe I did like you when we were kids... and maybe I still like you now"

"You know I'll be there"

"Is that you?" "Wow...so much has changed"

"Whisper three words and I'll come running"

"I dream of you, all I do is dream of you"

[fabledresources]

𝐏𝐔𝐊𝐈𝐂𝐇𝐎 𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐌𝐏𝐓𝐒

it's exactly as it says, a compilation of prompts all collected from posts on pukicho's blog! basically just... a lot of chaos. enjoy <3

i feel like, if you scream at a small animal loud enough, it would simply explode.

what is man but an animal playing god?

if you were to vacuum up jello through a metal tube, well, i think that’d be a neat noise.

huh! it really is all about me!

i don't condone anything. i don't care if it's good or bad, i just don't condone it.

i believe that, when we die, we cry in the dirt for eternity, and i welcome it.

i bet you work at the anti-soup kitchen, which steals soups from the poor.

your suffering is my heaven.

no one broods in the 21st century. that's a 19th century and under activity.

i make the bros blush and giggle.

i love how spider-man is kinda like our biggest guy. the greeks had odysseus, we have spider-man. 

i bite my nails sometimes. i yearn for my own bones.

being silly and goofy and getting to help people when they're down? sounds like i win this round, loser.

instead of whoring around, you could learn a musical instrument!

i  would love to visit some innocent happy gnome village and just start stompin'.

if we were all living in the wilderness, natural selection would get you first.

the absence of purpose is enough reason to do whatever the fuck you feel like doing.

i love making shit up and lying to people and never telling them the truth.

feeling very unethical today, might spread hate.

god has granted you the gift of knowledge and yet you shun him.

i went to the doctors, i got my blood drawn. i was extremely brave.

you're my greatest enemy. i will add a single grain of sand to your room every day until you succumb to the desert.

close your eyes and imagine yourself being a more likeable person, and then open them and weep.

your words of defiance bring me ungodly amounts of rage.

i want nothing more than to uppercut you directly to heaven's front door.

i'll outlive this fucking planet if it looks at me the wrong way.

mother earth will cry tears of joy the day you become part of her soil.

i hope you all get stuck somewhere and you have to eat each other to survive.

kids are just like 'ppptppptppthhptpppthh' until one day they’re like 'oh shit i can think' and then it’s all downhill from there.

hey, do you ever feel just so much love in your damn heart that you wanna break something just for fun?

if you kill me, my teeth only have a 2% drop rate. good luck.

beautiful women are always swarming me, saying things like ‘hey [name], why don’t we elope?’ or ‘hey [name], let’s run away and leave it all behind’ and i tell them no, i have a responsibility to verbally abuse people on the internet.

i never sleep. i just die and then wake up in the morning.

if you mean to tell me there ISN’T a ghoul that manifests and wanders the halls in ikea past closing time, then i don’t believe you.

i have too many enchanted crystals and not enough blood sacrifices to do anything with them.

i am going to liquidate all of my assets and use the money to hire hitmen to slap you daily for the rest of your life.

[ourflagmeansbts]

Source (Season 1 - September 28th 2021)

alexj_sherman: So that’s a season one production wrap on #OurFlagMeansDeath! This has been one of the hardest, longest, most rewarding summers of my life. I am so excited for people to see this show. We had the most amazing cast, the most amazing crew, and some pretty solid, semi-respected producers (me and Alyssa). It was a lot of long hours and hard work, but I don’t think a day went by where we weren’t laughing. I have never felt more pride in my work. Getting to see these dumb ideas come to life and getting the opportunity to collaborate with some of the greatest minds this industry has to offer will be something I treasure for a long time. Every single department was next level. From stunts to vfx to props to art to costumes to special fx to casting to camera to construction to set dec to lighting to sound to our AD team, everyone was amazing and brought their own unique aspect to the show that only made it better. (and a special thanks to the Covid team for keeping us safe). We also had some amazing actors. The talent you’re going to see onscreen is insane. I got to work with an actress I crushed on before I even knew what puberty was. I got to pitch jokes to some of my favorite comedians I watched in college. I got to excitedly text my mom about working with people her and I watched on our favorite eps of SNL 15 years ago. Finally, I do have to give a special shout out to @dvidjenkins. Thank you so much for inviting us along for this journey. Alyssa and I had just decided we didn’t want to staff again, but after he sent us the pilot script we were blown away and knew we wanted to play in this world. It’s been a hell of a year since. It really feels like the magic and joy we felt on set was captured and is making it into the cuts. Very excited to show you all more when I can, and bring some pirate fuckery to the world!

[mieux-de-se-taire]

Danger Days - Part 2

Save Yourself - one of my favorites from Danger Days, definitely my favorite Danger Days intro, that simple opening melody is just so perfect, and then the lyrics, god the lyrics, every single line fucks so hard, and they’re arguably some of the best Gerard ever wrote, this song is just everything distilled: the anger and resentment while still being catchy and fun, the raw cynicism paired with the will and determination to live and care for others, the martyr complex in full force with contemplations on legacy and immortality, the song is just screaming “I’ll die for you! I’ll die for you!”, as a fuck you to the media and those who commodified their suffering and the suffering of their fans, and as a promise to their fans, I’ll protect you, I’ll die for you, I’ll die for you, and isn’t that the message underlying all of Danger Days and Conventional Weapons, christ, and then how legacy is tied into it: “We’re never leaving this place alive / But if we sing these words we’ll never die”, “We can live forever if you’ve got the time”,  “This ain’t about all the friends you’ve made / but the graffiti they write on your grave”, when making and joining a band saved your life but then spiraled out of control and fame threatened to tear you apart again but the very thing that’s killing you is also your legacy and the reason you will never die because you will always be remembered and hated and loved, and what kills you keeps you alive, the poison is the cure, oh my god, I don’t know if any of this is coherent, I love this song so fucking much 

Scarecrow - on the surface one of the happier songs MCR ever wrote, but stupidly devastating when you really listen to the lyrics and learn about the context and deeper meaning, still such a bright, summery, comforting song, one of the most important Danger Days songs I would argue, especially the lyric “Love won’t stop this bomb” (3:07), which is one of the central themes on this record, and as a follow up to save yourself, the repetition of the idea that the end is inevitable and they’re going to die, but instead of anger, scarecrow is more about comfort, it feels like a love letter to their fans, the band still acting as martyrs but focusing more on the listener: “He burns my skin / Never mind about the shape I’m in / I’ll keep you safe tonight”, and knowing that love won’t change anything, but caring anyway, man, maybe Geoff Rickly is right

Summertime - a great transition from Scarecrow by keeping the cheerier sound but actually making it joyful through some truly tender and sweet lyrics, it’s so sappy, almost excessively so, but there’s something so pure and genuine about it, which I think is one of Gerard’s greatest strengths as a writer and a singer, to be able to write very simple lines that would otherwise sound cheesy and phony (think Famous Last Words “I am not afraid to keep on living / I am not afraid to walk this world alone”) but delivering them in way that feels so honest and resolute and making you believe everything they say, it’s also interesting how unabashedly positive it is considering the darkness and anger or bittersweet melancholy that seems to accompany joy everywhere else on this album, Summertime becomes a breath of fresh air

Destroya - completely unironically my favorite Danger Days song, actually the first I heard other than Na Na Na, it fucks so hard, I always have to sing along with the chorus, it’s just so infectious, and the drums, man, it’s one of the most aggressive and powerful sounding songs on the album, and there’s something hypnotically and subversively menacing about it, especially how it was performed live in 2022 with Gerard growling and screaming with demonic vocal distortion, it sounds like a kind of battle cry, which is part of why the extended moaning sections are such a bold and unique choice, but it works in a weird way, at least once you know to expect it (and it’s not live and Frank isn’t genuinely whimpered and groaning on stage sir this is an all ages show), it’s just so angry and weird and fucked up and incredible, and it has some of my all time favorite Danger Days lyrics like “If what you are / is just what you own / What have you become / when they take from you / almost everything?”, which is a brilliant line that ties into the themes of criticizing commodification and consumerism found on Conventional Weapons and Danger Days, also “You don’t believe in God / I don’t believe in luck / They don’t believe in us / But I believe we’re the enemy” is such a raw line, god it’s such a great song, fuck anyone who just reduces it to just the “horny” song 

Kids from Yesterday - probably of one the best songs on the album, especially how they performed it live in 2022 and 2023 with the extended outro (Ray Toro what the fuck is wrong with you this is devastating), it’s so bittersweet and nostalgic and just brimming with love, they always describe it as a song for themselves and you can really hear and see the joy and love among them when they perform it, while other songs feel like promises to the audience, Kids feels like a promise to each other, “I love you. I love you. I will always love you”, it’s so fucked up, “I’ll find you when the sun goes black”, unforgiveable, and it’s also interesting how they revisit legacy as a theme (”You only live forever in the lights you make” is one of my favorite lines in the entire album) and discuss many of the same struggles of fame as other songs, but do so in a far less angry way, it puts less focus on the band as a single entity to be exploited, revered, and hated and more focus on the individuals and how their legacy relates to them as people and their connections with one another, god, it’s just such a stunning song, wish I could listen to it more but I literally can’t handle it

Goodnite, Dr. Death - I really like the radio transmission at the beginning, but I usually skip this one because I don’t feel the need to listen to the American national anthem on the regular, especially not with the very painful (cool sounding, but painful) jumpscare at the end, that being said, it might be favorite of Dr. Death Defying’s interludes, because it’s much calmer and more muted, almost soothing, but disturbing at the same time with how casually death is warned against in an address to children, really adds to the world building, and “Even if you’re dusted, you may be gone, but out here in the desert, your shadow lives on without you” is such a cool line

Vampire Money - so fucking funny, I don’t even know what to say, the iconic roll call intro and countdown followed immediately by the deeply poetic line “We came to fuck”, the fact that it was changed to “We came to suck” in the clean version, the fact that Frank says “Oh I’m there baby” sounding like he’s talking about sex rather than playing music, which he has never once (at least to my knowledge) properly said live and even refuses to acknowledge, the way the whole song is making fun of how people latched onto and then commodified their vampire symbolism and aesthetic early on, and specifically being asked to write a song for the twilight movies, god, I love how they’re so aware of and continuously willing to poke fun at how they’ve been portrayed and perceived over the years, and I also love how malleable this song is live, changing lyrics in little ways every time they perform it, another great example of Danger Days songs being best live

[alcestas-sloboda]

this year broke my heart and left it lying in pieces. the worst thing one can imagine become daily news reports. death, ruins, destruction, that godforsaken air-raid siren, constant fear and anxiety but there were also love and hope, pride and joy - there was everything.

i would never forget that day, the shaking of my hands and worried voices of my parents. that first week or two when you don’t know what will happen next. than there were 5 month of daily volunteering through which I hopefully helped people who needed it the most.

there were also two semesters of uni, the interest in which I lost a long time ago but still couldn’t dare to let it go. there is now only one semester left and I will be a bachelor, what happens next? who knows? I hate myself for thinking the worst, for not knowing what to do with myself, not trying in general - I will try to change it, I will, I must.

this year was one that almost gave a reason to keep going. those tragedies became a point of no return - my worldview changed completely. there are things that will haunt me for the rest of my life and there were people who will be with me forever.

the only thing I want to talk about now is my country. my beloved motherland. my people. my greatest support. my steel. nobody believed in us, no one thought we would withstand but we did. as we always do. we showed the world what courage looks like, what actually great culture looks like - the one that blossoms even under the rocket fires not the one that destroys museums and theatres - what great people look like.

I’m eternally grateful to all of the defenders for everything: for every lived moment, for every eaten meal and coffee, for every read book and concert. you give everything and much more for our future and all I hope for is that my support is at least a ted helpful.

eternal glory to all the fallen heroes. to everyone who gave their lives for peaceful and victorious Ukraine.

there were so many things that keep appearing inside my brain right now. that first zelenskyy address on 24th. bucha and irpin’. me and my friend making the most random playlist during the night because we just couldn’t sleep. azovstal’ and mariupol. roman ratushnyi. eurovision win. kremenchuk. vinnytsia. when I started watching football again. kharkiv. mykolaiv. liberated kherson. mass graves in izium. our soldier castrated and shot by russians. bavovna in belgorod. olenivka. patron the dog. bakmut. first hug with my friend from kyiv. severodonetsk. return of mariupol defenders. ukrainian football even with the air threat. finished course paper during the blackouts. sunflowers. my skies covered in smoke. cyber bullying of russians. zhadan as leitmotif. pain. so much pain. and hatred. unfathomable hatred toward everything russian.

that is not even the whole list. hopefully next year will be more about love and joy than about pain and hate but even if the world has something more in stall for Ukraine and Ukrainians - we will withstand. that’s it, nothing less, nothing more.

thank you for everyone here who was engaged in our own informational warfare. thank you for sharing information and donations, thank you for kind word and constant support and also thank you to those anons that thought that Ukrainian thick skin could be pierced with cruel words and propaganda stories - everything was well and truly appreciated.

love you all. here is to victorious 2023. victorious for the one who doesn’t give up, victorious for the fighters and warriors and for those who stands on their side. to the other side of the world: you will lose. shamefully and disgracefully without a single droplet of tears from us.

glory to Ukraine! ❤️

[twilightmalachite]

Machina - Dues ex... 5

Author: Kino Seitaro (with Akira)

Characters: Mika, Shu, Sora, Makoto

Translator: Mika Enstars

"A farewell to cryptocurrency—watching the philistines all flock to it won’t be too bad either. ♪"

Season: Winter

Location: Sky

Shu: Now, let us begin. Our final act—The march of the mechanical god!

Mika: Ahahahahah! Art is an explosion~! ☆

Location: Sky Garden (SSVRS)

The screen shakes wildly with a thunk

Makoto & Sora: ……♪

Makoto: Ahaha, they’re on a rampage that seems to have unleashed all their past inhibitions. What’s going to happen to the value of the VL$ after all this?

Sora: Only God knows~! ♪

As for the value of the VL$ though, there was a notice in the Test World terms and conditions that there is a possibility of loss.

The test players who were invited to participate all are aware of this.

And it should be all OK for someone from the game company to take care of the rest~! ♪

Makoto: Wow, fair enough. ♪

Well, it was made clear it was a “test” from the start, so I don’t think anyones converting their assets into VL$, at the very least…

But aside from that, nobody likes to see the loss of the value of their in-game assets either~.

All the Test World’s players have come out into the plaza all at once with the arrival of the mechanical god.

Ack~, my blood as a gamer is rushing!

Harukawa-kun, should we go and join in on the battle too?

Sora: Yes! Sora was just thinking the same thing! ♪

A thrilling battle that’ll make hands sweat! This is why Sora can’t stop playing games~! ♪

Location: Sky

Mika: Hey, Oshi-san, look. There’s a whole lotta players down there…♪

Shu: They all look like ants. It seems that this Test World is quite a lively one.

Mika: Mhm. I think it’s amazin’ how every single player here, each from different walks of live all have a life of their own.

Though it’d be nice if these were all my fans. If VL$ crashes, what will they say ‘bout us?

I won’t be able to point anythin' out, yer SNS has already gotten flamed, Oshi-san…♪

Shu: Hmph. You care too much.

Concern yourself with what the masses think too much and your self-expression will atrophy.

All human beings are different, and more often than not we are unable to understand one another. Even among those who wish to create the same art, opinions differ.

And that is why moments where you truly understand another are of the greatest joy.

Most will be indifferent to your creations. There will even be some who will become hostile towards you because of this fiasco.

But, it is a fact that there will be fans of your work among them all.

Value is found in the work itself, not by its value on the market. That fact is one of utmost importance to an artist.

You mustn’t make that mistake. When you make your work, who do you do it for?

Mika: …Yeah. I’ll remember this day well.

Ahaha, the things you say are really always so significant, huh, Oshi-san. I think the reason I’m always in a slump is ‘cuz I’d always be watchin’ yer complexion, Oshi-san!

I’mma carve it into my heart, and pursue my own art!

Oh! I remember, this game’s got a tippin’ feature!

The money value’s gonna hit zero anyways, so let’s scatter it all from the sky!

Shu: Ka ka ka ka! An interesting idea, Kagehira!

A farewell to cryptocurrency—watching the philistines all flock to it won’t be too bad either. ♪

Give it your all! Enjoy the pleasures that only the virtual world can offer…♪

Mika: I’ll spread it all everywhere~! We, Valkyrie, are a unit that pursues true art!

If money is what you want, come an’ get it! Right now I’ve got too much money t’know what to do with!

Ya can use money to create and sell yet own work, so use it, everyone! ♪

Mika: Thank ya, Test World! And goodbye, Test World!

It’s been fun so far! But I’ll be returnin’ to reality fer a while…☆

← prev | story directory | next →

[iviarellereads]

Nona the Ninth, Chapter 29

(Curious what I'm doing here? Read this post! For detail on The Locked Tomb coverage and the index, read this one! Like what you see? Send me a Ko-Fi.)

(First House icon) In which oh yeah, that WAS in the day's events preview, wasn't it?

Everyone makes to get into the big truck, and Nona thinks longingly of her home. Pyrrha sits Nona in the chair Cam no longer needs. The new person herds everyone, stopping and healing all the worn-down people. The Angel and Pash show up, with Noodle as well. Nona asks if they're coming with, and Pash says not to get her started. She goes where Aim goes, and Aim is going with the crew, to the Nine Houses. Aim says they are a liability, and the commander will get some breathing room once they're safe.

Nona said: “Who are you?” Then she explained, “Everyone asks me the same question, so—I feel like it’s my turn.” “You don’t get to ask,” said Pash roughly; which Nona thought was a wonderful and very cool answer she wished she had come up with herself. But the Angel leant down and looked at Nona. There was something settled in her face: a calmness that had not existed there before—a kind of immovable, fixed-concrete resolve. [...] She suddenly reached up and grasped the Angel’s hand, and the Angel grasped hers, and the Angel looked at her. “I’m the Messenger,” said the Angel simply. “We are the Message … the message has two parts left, and you are looking at one of those parts. The name for this part of the message was ‘Aim’ when the message was passed to us through my forebear Emma Sen.(1) The message is too simple for human beings like us to understand. What do you think the message is?”(2) Nona couldn’t guess. “I hope you hear it one day,” said Aim. She reached out—she ruffled Nona’s hair—she smiled. Then she said, “Noodle, let’s go,” and she stepped resolutely up the ramp and into the truck.

Pash makes a joke about having to shoot Nona now,(3) waits a beat, then says it really was only a joke, and goes up the ramp. Pyrrha picks Nona out of the chair and remarks that she's been very calm. Nona says there's not long left, and asks if they're going to find her. Pyrrha says yes, it might be time to wake her up.

Pyrrha brings her to a huge cockpit with massive wraparound windows. Kiriona is already there, strapped into a seat.

She did not speak to them, even when Pyrrha said, “Hey, kid.” She had not said much of anything since Camilla and Palamedes had become Camilla-and-Palamedes—seemed withdrawn and lost in thought, unwilling to look at anyone or anything.(4)

The new person enters, with We Suffer, and Crown supporting Judith. The new person takes the biggest seat at the front.

“Mind showing me how this thing starts?” they said to the commander. “Oh, dear God,”(5) said the commander. “For what I am about to do, I will go down as history’s greatest monster.”

Nevertheless, she leans down and gives instructions. Pyrrha asks to be allowed to drive instead.

“No chance,” said Palamedes-and-Camilla comfortably. And: “Commander … thank you. Leave everything to me.” “I do—I have,” said We Suffer. And— “Every single hope of Eden(6) now rests within this clapped-out vehicle.” “Same for the Nine Houses,” said Palamedes-and-Camilla. “You know what I want,” said We Suffer. She turned to address the rest of the driver’s cockpit. “To complete what she started. Troia, listen to me. Every so often there is invoked a Blood of Eden mission protocol—we call it Protocol One. It is used in times of either terrible joy or the worst possible outcomes. Protocol One means there are no more formal orders—if given in the field of battle, often it is understood as ‘Scatter. Retreat. Disunite,’ but it is not quite that. There is a different protocol that is simply used for retreat, protocol that means ‘Save yourselves.’ I received the order to save myself when I was young … and I saved myself, which is why you hear me now, starting this terrible truck, putting my life’s work in the hands of my enemies and of strangers I do not understand. But now I give you Protocol One … and Protocol One is ‘Live.’”(7)

Crown and Pyrrha salute WS, and the new person asks what mission protocol she'll give the local forces. WS replies, basically the standard, "Fight like hell and do not shoot any civilians." She starts wishing them luck in turn, Crown, Nona, even Pyrrha, but when she comes to the new person…

We Suffer paused. Camilla-and-Palamedes cocked their burnt head to one side. “Paul,” they suggested.(8) “Paul. Good luck, Paul,” said We Suffer. “Now … you have my coat, which you can keep, but my wallet is in the breast pocket, so hand it over.”

Paul obediently hands over the wallet, and WS leaves to give final orders to those not in the room. Pyrrha asks how long they'd been planning the conversion, and Paul says "They had a lot of rainy-day backup plans."

“Yeah, but—Paul?” “Just Paul,” said Paul. Crown suggested, “Paul … Hect?” “Just Paul,” said Paul. “U Lap,” said the corpse prince, from the back of the cabin.(9) “Thanks for your contribution,” said Paul. “Aulp,” said the corpse prince. “No,” said Paul.

There's a final burst of radio comm with WS, wishing luck and such, and then Paul starts up the truck. Nona feels so strange, insulated from the mechanical movement feelings by being in Pyrrha's lap, with her body feeling so numb. Pyrrha asks, what now, and Paul releases a lever allowing the truck to lurch forward. The cabin grows cold. An automated fan starts whirring to clear the condensation from everyone's breaths, and a heater melts it into water that pools, then starts to run up into the windshield.

Paul leant forward on the accelerator, and then—

=====

(1) The Messenger. I think I already alluded to AOL Instant Messenger in a previous chapter. This just confirms it. Emma Sen, MSN messenger. I can't tell if I think this was just an incredibly elaborate setup for a joke, or if I think Muir is going to pull something out of this reference in Alecto. Both, really, I suppose. (2) What do you think the message is? Why are there two parts? Who, or what, is the other? The message is too simple, but they didn't say the message, they said codewords that imply a message. I can't wait to see if this comes back, honestly. (3) The classic "you know too much" beat from spy movies. Is it really a meme or reference, in the modern senses, or just… universal language of storytelling, at this point? (4) Wondering what it would be like to have fused with Harrow so thoroughly. Wondering if there's still a chance they could. Wondering if it's better not to know the insides of Harrow's thoughts so intimately after all. Thoughts wandering (intentionally confusing usage) onward down through all the questions she still has about and for Harrow. I see you, Kiriona. (5) Very likely, a very different God from the one most of the Nine Houses characters have invoked. Though, maybe the same one as John. (6) Every hope of Eden. What does We Suffer hope for Eden? There's so much symbology in the choice of the name of the organization, after all. We just saw in John's recounting the way that the ancestors of the modern non-House civilization cast themselves out of Eden, out of the origin world, out of the safety of the garden of home. How much has the Blood of Eden mission changed in ten thousand years? How far have they warped? What do they even want anymore, besides… no, not besides, what do they want after elimination of the Nine Houses empire? Do they even know? Do they have the faintest idea? (7) I can't find a good specific reference for this, it's so vague as to be unsearchable, but it's a beautiful backup mission statement to have at the ready.

(8) This one word, this one line, is quite honestly what made me want to do this whole project. It's been percolating in my brain for the entire 10 months since I first read the book. Honestly I don't even think I have space for my entire yell about it, so the shortest version is "go look up some articles about Paul the Apostle, and yell with me." The next shortest version is that Paul was born Saul (which calls back to the longish ah sound that Muir said in the GtN bonus materials tied Palamedes and Camilla's names together as a matched pair) and was an enemy of Jesus, before he had a revelation, and converted. As many as fourteen of the twenty-seven books of the New Testament are sometimes attributed to his writing, though only seven can be undoubtedly verified. Contrary to common belief, Paul wasn't exactly a name given on his conversion. It was fairly typical to have a Hebrew name and a Greco-Roman name at the time, and the names are used somewhat interchangeably in some contexts within gospel. Using "Paul" would put a lot of his converts more at ease than using "Saul" in the same era. At any rate, Paul was one of the biggest names in the early Church, big on conversion this guy. And I think the symbolism of all that, rolled up into this new unfaithful Lyctor who started faithful to John and now is faithful to their own ideal… it's just very interesting. Especially since Kiriona the actual son (daughter) of God has shown up just as the final stages of conversion were underway. (There may or may not be an even longer version of this essay but it's better done by someone with more professional biblical scholarship and possibly as a degree thesis.) (9) Sorry, Kiriona, but Paul is a lot less anagram-able than Sex Pal.

[weight-loss-ok]

Master your Willpower : Strategies Success

The concept of willpower holds a special place in our society. Those who possess it are respected and admired, often serving as examples to others. Countless movies have been made, highlighting the heroic struggle of individuals with iron wills. It seems that nearly everyone dreams of having such unwavering determination, especially when it comes to weight loss or hitting the gym. Today, we will uncover a secret: each and every one of us already possesses the power of will. The key lies in knowing when to use it and when not to. Join us as we delve into the topic of willpower.

The Time Investment

Curious about the exact amount of willpower required to achieve remarkable results? The answer might surprise you. In my case, it amounted to just six minutes every week, sustained over a period of three and a half years. To put it in perspective, that’s a mere two minutes during an hour-long workout. Yes, just two short minutes when I truly needed to tap into my willpower, contorting my face in determination.

The rest of the time, I breathe, lift weights as my strength permits, jot down notes, go home, spend time with my family, and attend to daily tasks. Trust me, each and every one of you can spare six minutes a week for such a remarkable transformation through willpower. After all, you have tackled tasks that were more demanding and taxing in the past.

The Greatest Deception

There exists a prevalent belief, largely perpetuated by Hollywood, that sticking to a diet, eating healthily, avoiding excessive drinking, and going to bed on time all require unwavering willpower. This is false! While all these factors, including exercise, are crucial for achieving results, they are not synonymous with willpower. They are simply part of a lifestyle—and encompassing 24/7 commitment, 365 days a year. The advice to rely solely on willpower while changing your lifestyle implies that every single second of your life must be endured, suffering through every fleeting moment.

No normal person would willingly subject themselves to such a life, as it simply isn’t desirable or sustainable. Only a psychologically unhealthy individual could endure such a lifestyle, and they are a rarity. Willpower is not the appropriate tool for such circumstances. It’s like attempting to drive a nail with a saw—it’s ineffective. No one can hang from a pull-up bar indefinitely without succumbing to fatigue. It’s unnecessary and impossible. Therefore, remember Rule #1: Willpower is suitable for short bursts of effort, characterized by tension and subsequent relaxation. It cannot change your life.

The Path to Transformation

If willpower alone isn’t the answer, then what is? To truly change your life in a way that brings joy and fulfillment, rather than enduring constant struggle and setbacks, different tools and methods are required. You will discover them by subscribing to the newsletter on the website upanddownsides.com in the “Weight Loss” category. Additionally, you will find valuable information about nutrition, training, diets, and much more, along with free consultations. Don’t forget to share this article with your friends!

Conclusion

In conclusion, willpower is an incredible asset for short-term efforts, but it should not be relied upon as the sole means to achieve lasting transformation. The belief that a strict diet, healthy eating, abstaining from indulgences, and adhering to a strict sleep schedule necessitate unwavering willpower is not entirely accurate. While willpower can be a valuable asset for short-term efforts, it should not be solely relied upon to achieve lasting transformation. Attempting to rely solely on willpower for long-term lifestyle changes can lead to frustration, burnout, and ultimately, failure.

Willpower is a finite resource that can be depleted over time, especially when constantly tested and challenged. It’s unrealistic to expect ourselves to constantly resist temptations and make perfect choices without any slip-ups. The truth is, maintaining a strict diet, practicing healthy eating habits, abstaining from indulgences, and adhering to a strict sleep schedule requires more than just willpower.

To achieve lasting transformation, it’s essential to adopt a holistic approach that encompasses various strategies and techniques. Here are some key elements to consider:

Create a supportive environment

 Surround yourself with people who share similar goals and provide encouragement. Modify your physical surroundings to make healthy choices more accessible and tempting options less available.

Set achievable goals

 Break your larger goals into smaller, attainable milestones. Celebrate each success along the way, which will provide motivation and reinforce positive habits.

Develop healthy habits

Focus on establishing sustainable habits rather than relying solely on willpower. Gradually incorporate healthier eating patterns, regular exercise, and adequate sleep into your routine.

Plan and prepare

Take the time to plan your meals, schedule workouts, and organize your environment to minimize decision fatigue and make it easier to stick to your goals.

Seek support

 Engage with a support system that can provide guidance, accountability, and motivation. This can be in the form of a coach, mentor, or a community of like-minded individuals.

Practice self-compassion

 Acknowledge that setbacks and slip-ups are part of the journey. Instead of being overly critical, learn from these experiences and use them as opportunities for growth.

Remember, lasting transformation is a process that requires dedication, patience, and a multifaceted approach. While willpower plays a role, it should be complemented by other strategies and techniques to create sustainable lifestyle changes. By embracing these principles, you can achieve your goals and maintain a healthier and happier life in the long run.

[twogravesinsomecemetery]

A Love Letter to the Greatest Love Story Ever Told ~ September 10th, 2023

I’ve thought about writing something vaguely soppy about the X-Files for the longest time now. It’s been stewing in my head for months. But I’ve probably been subconsciously thinking about it for years. 

I am so glad this show existed. 

For everything it did, everything it said, all the crazy, unhinged things it came up with in the name of the truth is out there. As Dana Scully once said: I wouldn’t change a day. I want to remember how it all was. I think what it comes down to is: This show has never made me anything but extraordinarily happy. I have loved every single second of it. I think I always will. I first saw it when I was eight-years-old. It's one of those stories that never leaves you. No matter where I’m at in my life, irrespective of what I’m doing, or how many other interests I have, I will always find myself returning… here. To the basement office underneath the J. Edgar Hoover Building. To the blinding lights and the Government conspiracies. To you’re my one in five billion and Joy to the World.

For all its talk about starlight, and faith to keep looking, this completely nonsensical, sometimes actually terrible, sci-fi show about UFOs actually held so much more meaning than you could ever expect of it. With a little help from David Duchovny, I'll just say this. Sometimes these things are over-plasticised and simplified. But this was never like that. This show would’ve been completely forgiven if it talked about nothing but little green men for one or two seasons before calling it a day, but instead, it looked up into the stars after nearly a decade, and said: maybe there’s hope. And I hope they know how important that is. 

Something that’s particularly bittersweet now is one of Doggett’s lines in Sunshine Days. 

“Why are people still watching a 30-year-old TV show?” 

And Scully immediately replies: “Because they were the perfect family.” 

Because it means the world. Because wonders never cease. Because I am always happy to find a reason.

 Not that I never needed one. 

Another of my favourite lines in the same episode is: 

The X-Files will go on forever. 

And maybe it will. In the heads of cultists and conspiracy theorists, in the hearts of TV nerds who never really had other friends. To the people who saw this entirely unhinged show about aliens and found something more than they were ever expecting to. One thing that’s always stood out to me is… how incredibly human it is. How incredibly profound it is. Not only is it a love story, but it’s a love story in every possible regard. Not to take the words out of the mouth of a nameless reviewer, but, it had everything. A love for life. A love for truth. A love for one another. 

And how on earth do you write a love letter to the greatest love story ever told? The truth is, I don’t think you can. You just have to go back to the beginning again. To Bellefleur, Oregon. To standing out in the mud and the rain. To the motel fires and Billy Miles. To sorry, nobody down here but the FBI’s most unwanted. To September 10th, 1993. 

Y'know what? I just might.

Happy 30th, old friend. ✨❤️👽