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highdio · 10 months ago

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Pleeease, write your thoughts about the musical lol. I really like your Dio meta posts <3

Just a disclaimer: this is really opinionated but I don't like to drag media for its own sake. There were lots of things to like in the Phantom Blood musical, just ... Dio wasn't one of them. Also, Mamoru Miyano threw himself into the performance he was asked for, so it's hardly his fault. It's just always amazing to me that people feel the need to rewrite Dio into someone else when the way Araki's written him is already perfect, complete and a lot of fun.

So, where to start? Basically, the Phantom Blood musical re-writes Dio, giving him a different personality and different motivations through OOC stage direction along with a bunch of original dialog and scenes. What results is a version of Phantom Blood where "Dio" is just a normal guy without charisma who had a bad childhood and spends most of the story being miserable. Dio as he's written in canon has an uncommon charisma and appeal that's allowed him to remain relevant as one of those 'all-time great' villains. Scene after scene in the musical prove that its creative team either didn't read the manga or just really didn't like Dio.

fwiw Araki wrote Dio as thoroughly fleshed-out, with consistent traits and behaviors and consistent motivations behind his actions. He also left a paper trail of interviews and author's commentaries that develop Dio even more fully beyond the manga. So there's really no excuse for media that treat Dio as some sort of empty vessel waiting to be filled by narrative cliches we already know and expect.

It's annoying too, because, along with its OOC content, the musical is peppered with occasional manga-consistent moments. It's like the musical is camouflaging its Very Bad Take on Dio by having Mamoru Miyano periodically re-enact the canon character's most famous panels. The musical wants simultaneously to take credit for bringing Araki's vision to life on the stage, while at the same time completely undermining its most important element: a capital V "Villain" who, according to Araki, "accepts and embraces his evil nature, and follows his dark path without hesitation." This is the biggest change the musical makes to Dio: musical!Dio has none of the confidence that allows canon Dio him to move so decisively and destructively through the narrative.

Musical Dio is introduced by a scene where he's bullied on his way home, before breaking into a song about how terrible his life is, where "everything is always taken from [him]" ("it's hell …I feel nauseated …[I'm] under a cloudy sky.") The song is alternately tearful and hopeful. "I'm going crazy from being robbed!" he laments and then pollyannaishly muses, "hey, Joestar, can you turn my [cloudy] skies to blue?"

If Dio being introduced as a sad sap and self-described perennial loser hoping for any break sounds attitudinally unfamiliar that's because it is. Araki went in the opposite direction: he started his story by subverting the cliche - wide-eyed poor boy victimized by circumstance leaves his sorrow-filled life hoping for a new start - and instead gave us a kid with surprising, even sinister agency. Dio is not just given a hero's upward narrative arc (something Araki crafted very deliberately), he's introduced improbably in his first scene from a position of control. This fact is important because in the manga it's a position he won't lose until four chapters and nearly 100 pages in, when Jonathan finally fights back. From the time young Dio is introduced - reading a book with his back turned to his bed-ridden father who he's secretly poisoning -

- to the time he's systematically broken down his adoptive brother's spirit by alienating him from his friends, taking Erina's first kiss, and of course kicking his dog, Dio is shown as being in control and on top (Erina drinking the muddy water is the only exception). It's OOC to imagine 12-year old Dio feeling sorry for himself because at the time he's introduced, he's already made a habit of getting what he wants. By the time he sets off for the Joestars after killing his first dad, he's already developed full confidence in his abilities and the inevitability of his rise to riches (something Araki has him explicitly state and then underscores with a panel illustration of a steam train signaling the rise of Modernity).

But the writers and director of the musical don't find this characterization interesting enough or something. So they lose the canon entirely and in its place they invent a version of Dio who's despondent. And they didn't get Araki's steam train memo so they miss the Modernity theme (even though Araki's tied Dio so tightly conceptually to the idea of the Modern that he has him "use a 20th century boxing technique in the 19th century"); instead they double down on class difference being determinative. It never occurs to them that Dio is written specifically by Araki with the freedom to move outside of his social status because he sees it as artificial (the "evil elite" monologue later reveals Dio thinks of the whole social contract thing is arbitrary and voluntary).

Throughout the musical, Dio (although it's not fair to Mamoru Miyano since he isn't responsible for writing this mess, let's use mamoDio from now on because it's easier) seems to idolize the Joestars for what he calls their "beautiful blood." Not "beautiful" because usable calories for the vampire he will become but "beautiful" because noble. The Joestars' noble status and the honor that's apparently behind that status become the shining "star" toward which mud-bound mamoDio flailingly, failingly reaches. I don't need to tell you that in canon Dio doesn't have respect for nobility.

"Mud and stars" is heavy-handedly introduced as a dominant theme of the musical. According to the play, Jonathan, noble and bright, looks to the stars while human Dio, pathetic, conflicted and even confused, can only see life as a mud-soaked prison.

Now, the mud and stars thing was only used in Part 1 as a single text element on a Volume 1 illustration but, in spite of its marginality, it's becomes a liturgical text for some fans looking for an explanation for Dio's actions beyond what Araki gives them in the actual narrative. To this sort of fan, a guy who embraces his inner talent for evil and never had the misfortune of developing a moral compass isn't the right type of villain because he's unapologetic. If the villain doesn't have excuses how can you apologize for him? So they need Dio and by extension Araki to give them a "good enough" reason to accept Dio's ever-escalating atrocities. If the reasons Dio has for doing the things he does lie outside of what's considered good or acceptable, they are simply rejected and new reasons are invented in the hope of making Dio much less objectionable.

Now, like I said earlier, Araki's repeatedly told us in his writings that Dio has an upward narrative trajectory, not a downward, "mud"-bound one. The mud and stars duality fails to describe the narrative journey of the two main characters: both look upward to transcend their circumstances and travel along a shonen manga hero's rising path. (In fact, it's Jonathan who needs a good push to realize his potential, something Dio happily provides). And it's Jonathan, not Dio, who Araki first gives a downward arc, being handed defeat after defeat for those first four chapters before gaining his footing and progressively rising to Dio's challenges. "Mud and stars" isn't just a bad choice of metaphor, it's a misleading one.

Back to the musical, mamoDio is the exact opposite. An air of sadness and insecurity haunts his performance. An original scene where George presents the mud and stars dilemma as a lesson highlights Dio's lack of confidence and the depression that lurks behind it, as Dio bemoans how people doomed to "struggle and die" cannot possibly summon the hope it takes to look up to the stars (he's talking of course about himself).

Likewise, and here's where mamoDio's failure as a character really comes into full relief, seven years after this, when Dio's machinations are revealed and he's about to be arrested, before he uses the stone mask, mamoDio drops to the floor and spends the better part of a musical number in tears, bemoaning his sorry life ("I'm trapped in a prison covered in mud… no matter how hard I struggle I'm crushed…") and his lack of noble blood.

(btw this is after the manga scene where Dio fake cries; here, mamoDio is genuinely distraught).

Contrast this to the actual scene in the manga. His expressions in these panels are memorable because of how assured Araki draws him. Dio's entire world - his poisoning scheme, his grab at what one can assume would have been the entirety of the Joestar estate - is about to end but instead of despairing, he launches into a philosophical soliloquy. His body language is haughty: this isn't mamoDio crawling on the ground and decrying his upbringing and lack of noble blood, instead this is a man who apparently, almost irrationally, perceives himself as noble. When he uses the mask, Dio is smiling widely. Metaphorically speaking, he's looking at the stars.

When mamoDio uses the mask? He's on his knees. He's in tears. On one night he interjects, "Mother…" In short, he's conflicted.

One of these depicts Dio. The other does not.

Now obviously the writers and director of the musical must think making these seismic changes adds something to Dio's character. But (and I feel like this is a theme whenever I write these things) I'd argue it only makes him more basic. It makes him predictable and formulaic, someone we've seen in countless other stories.

(Oh! and did I mention mamoDio repeatedly calls himself "useless"!! Because he does this.)

Now, because mamoDio has no confidence and as a human acts out of desperation, when he becomes a vampire he still isn't Dio. Mamoru tries to make his vampire Dio evil and scary by expending a lot of energy, running about the stage and sticking out his tongue ad nauseum. When you look at how Araki has Dio move physically throughout the manga, it's the opposite of kinetic. Dio is a point of fixity who's charisma draws others toward him (ask me for more on this if you want because there's enough here for its own post).

Now for the worst of the worst: at the very end of the production, after the manga ending that features Jonathan's death and Dio's (presumed) defeat as a head imprisoned in Jonathan's arms, the musical takes an original twist in which, following a finale number featuring most of the cast, mamoDio is lead offstage by Jonathan. You read that right. mamoDio is hunched over, resigned, and Jonathan seems to take on a paternal role. Although the lyrics would have you believe this has something to do with "two fates becoming one," it's clear from the stage direction that any embers of Dio's ambition are being tamed and extinguished as Jonathan takes Dio's grasping hand, subdues him, and leads him docilely into the darkness.

It turns out Dio's vampire arc was just a phase, a hurt and lonely child lashing out and making a mess for attention.

His body language here is obscenely out of character. Consider the following because, as I said in the opening, in spite of what all these re-writes of Dio would have you believe, Araki crafted Dio with specificity and consistency: Araki only draws Dio (with very few exceptions) 1) standing tall, looking down at you; 2) back turned, looking back and down at you; or simply 3) back turned, (performatively?) ignoring you. Dio is never on the ground except when he's knocked down (think, young Jonathan finally fighting back in the Joestar home or, much later, Jotaro stopping time and landing those punches). By constrast, mamoDio has spent an incessant amount of time of the ground, crouching, kneeling,, bowing, hunched down. Who is this guy? So his hunched-down exit in the final moments of the production, literally being led by Jonathan (controlled??), is so amazingly stupid that if I didn't have a gif as proof, you might think I'm just making this stuff up:

There's plenty more to unpack that I won't address here: ghost Dario. The lack of grave-spitting. The complete absence of true joy or leisure expressed by Dio especially during his vampire era: no woman eating her baby, no owlcats, no Poco's sister. No chaise lounge. No roses(!). No fun. Not for Dio. That would be too manga-consistent. That might mean Araki wasn't giving us the appropriate message that bad guys are actually just sad guys.

tl;dr Dio isn't in the Phantom Blood musical. He's replaced by a normal guy who's motivated by a lack of self-esteem and despair that he wasn't born into an upper-class household, or something. He's boring. The result? There can be no Part 3 in this musical's world (and presumably no Parts 4, 5 or 6, no Giorno, no Jolyne, … you get the picture) because mamoDio just gives up. It's a nicely produced little tale about Jonathan Joestar and some random other guy who at some point gets a funny green coat.

#Anonymous #replies tag #jjba #jojo's bizarre adventure #dio brando #mp #dioposts #jojo no kimyou na bouken #jojo #phantom blood #phantom blood musical #dio talk #long post #the fact that media that's otherwise faithful to the text goes out of its way to rewrite Dio and only Dio consistently sends me

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hotvintagepoll · 2 months ago

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Thomas Mitchell (It's a Wonderful Life, Stagecoach, Only Angels Have Wings)—In It's a Wonderful Life, he's Uncle Billy, the man who ties string around his fingers to remind him of things (and STILL misses his nephew's wedding) and has a pet squirrel to comfort him in times of need; in Stagecoach (for which he won an Oscar!), he is a delightfully rough-and-tumble alcoholic who comes through for his fellow stagecoach passengers when they need him; in Pocketful of Miracles, he is a charming old-timer pool hustler who will rob you blind while reciting Shakespeare to you; I have not seen The Black Swan but he seems to have played some sort of pirate-y sidekick. Everywhere you look, this man was scrungling! (Also fun fact: he was the first actor to win competitive acting awards at the Oscars, Tonys, and Emmys, aka the Triple Crown of Acting!)

Harpo Marx (Night at the Opera, Night in Casablanca, Duck Soup)—While Groucho is better-known, Harpo's physical comedy is SECOND-TO-NONE. The man is a strange mime trapped in the paradigm of early 20th century movies. Every move is a symphony and simultaneously a colony of rats in a human skin suit. LISTEN. You MUST see this man in motion. Every still photo of him looks like a combination of a sad clown and a different, sadder clown, but it's only because he put so much joy in every motion.

This is round 3 of the contest. All other polls in this bracket can be found here. If you’re confused on what a scrungle is, or any of the rules of the contest, click here.

[additional submitted propaganda + scrungly videos under the cut]

Thomas Mitchell:

One of those job'bing character actors who turn up in a lot of movies in bit parts. He is a very good actor, with a lot of pathos—you probably know him as the uncle from It's a Wonderful Life, or Jean Arthur's newspaper friend from Mr. Smith Goes to Washington. A salt of the earth type who brings gravitas and pathos to every part. He scrungles gorgeously.

He was the first male actor to win the Triple Crown (Oscar, Emmy, and Tony). His Oscar win was for his exceptionally scrungly performance in Stagecoach (1939) clip linked.

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Basically, even the Academy agreed this man was scrungly and decided to give him an award for it!

Harpo Marx:

He's like if a clown was a hobo was also somehow a classically trained harpist, his face is always in some kind of contorted silly shape, feral curly haired ninnymuggins always doing weird things to people

Harpo is mute in all of the Marx Bros movies and so his body language and facial expressions are SO over the top but he's also got fewer braincells than a goldfish while often being the emotional heart of the Marx Bros and he's just A Guy!!

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Every scene with Harpo Marx is a treat! Just like watching a seagull steal a stranger's hotdog at the beach, it is a joy to watch him frustrate the hell out of all the other films' characters! Harpo Marx is the zenith of unhinged in all of his appearances, making any other funny man a straight man by comparison. (A fantastic feat considering he starred in films with his brothers Grouch and Harpo, who sported a shoe polish mustache and questionable Italian accent, respectively). The scrungliness of the little guys he plays come from his guileless, wide-eyed expression, curly blond wig, and the extreme ability to annoy others, despite never saying a word. Is he malicious? Most definitely, but hard to tell because he has a dopey grin on his face most of the time. Communicating through other sounds like honking horns and whistling, he is a force of chaos in every Marx brothers film! Also an accomplished harp player, the beautiful calm moments where Harpo plays juxtapose the zany, making him all the more scrungly. His visual style of comedy is timeless; Duck Soup had me rolling with laughter as a six year old and is still just as funny today.

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In my opinion Harpo is the funniest of the Marx brothers because he is so good at slapstick comedy. Since he never speaks in his film appearances his performances are very physical, which contributes a lot to his scrungliness. He was fully committed to being wacky at all times. All of his hilarity is based on him being weird.

He's just a weird little guy who causes chaos everywhere he goes, and then sits down and plays a beautiful harp solo! He steals the show from his very chatty brothers without saying a word, and was surprisingly ripped under that old raincoat

All of the Marx Brothers are Scrungly to a degree, but Harpo is the scrungliest! His outfits are so big he gets lost in them, his pockets are full of everything, and because he never speaks, he always uses physical comedy. Also he's an incredible musician.

#harpo marx #thomas mitchell #hotvintagepoll #scrungly 3 #Youtube

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mollymauk-teafleak · 1 year ago

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I wouldn't fall for someone I thought couldn't misbehave

I actually wrote a fic, go figure! Huge thanks to @minky-for-short for getting me into Hazbin and @hangsters for the support and love! I got a lot more where this came from <3

Please reblog and comment over on Ao3!

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They've been told to live tonight however they want. And with tomorrow's Extermination looming and the Hazbin Hotel right in the middle of the target, there's only one thing Angel Dust wants to do.

And that's the bartender.

---

You didn’t wind up in hell without knowing fear. Whether you got there by painting it on other people or seeing it in your reflection or both, it didn’t matter, to everyone down below, fear was like an old friend.

And to Angel Dust, fear was like a toxic hook up whose calls he couldn’t make himself ignore after years of dissatisfying back alley orgasms.

All to say, he knew the taste of it, sharp like battery acid and sour like cheap, soapy lube. He knew how it sounded, laughter stretched so thin you could see through it, the whir of a camera lens pulling close to try and see where you were breaking. He knew how it smelled, sweat and latex and dry ice. He knew how it felt, cheap faux fur and overwarm, foreign skin.

Angel had been sucking fear’s dick for longer than he cared to remember. But what surprised him was that he didn’t see it here.

They should be scared. They should all be pissing themselves in terror. In who knew how many hours, the worst Extermination they’d known would descend, with their home and everyone in it smack bang in the center of the target. And Heaven wasn’t in the habit of missing their shot.

But when Angel knocked back another shot of top shelf whiskey, he didn’t taste fear in it. The laughter that surrounded him was real, all he could feel was a warmth that he wasn’t sure came from the drink.

Maybe this was what fear felt like when you didn’t face it alone.

“You’re staring.”

Angel didn’t have much of a defense, especially when he hadn’t even realized that Vaggie had moved onto the barstool next to him and jumped a mile when she started speaking, nearly spilling his next shot. Because he was busy staring.

So he took evasive action instead, trying to piece his cool back together, “Ain’t you got a girlfriend waiting on you upstairs? What are you still doing down here?”

“Finishing my drink,” she gave him a cool, bemused look, proving her point by draining the rest of her glass, “I don’t think any of us are in a position to be wasting alcohol tonight. Or time.”

“Thanks for the riddle, toots,” Angel rolled his eyes, taking the shot before someone else could come along and nearly make him spill it.

“Want me to say it plainly then?” Vaggie arched an eyebrow.

Angel scowled but he wasn’t mad at Vaggie, not really. He was more pissed at himself for not hiding it better. The five time winner of the Golden Tongue Award (for best performance in a pornographic visual production) should probably have been able to school his face.

He let his eyes wander across the bar, if there was no point in hiding it anymore. Husk was tossing a cocktail shaker from one hand to the other before sending it up behind his back, bouncing it between his wings, making it disappear and reappear before pouring out an electric blue liquid into Nifty’s waiting glass, to her immense delight. He bowed to the slight but enthusiastic applause, showing Angel a glimpse of the showman he’d been once upon a time.

It wasn’t just that he was handsome. It wasn’t just that he was Angel’s exact type and then some, that gravelly voice, the snark, the emotional unavailability, the tortured past that muzzled him, his boxes were well and truly ticked. If it was just that, Angel would have torn his clothes off, rode him on that bar and moved on with his afterlife.

But Husk had pushed back. He’d growled and snapped and thrown up more walls until Angel started to see getting the cat’s trousers off as a professional challenge. Robbed of his only way to safely interact with people, to feel like he was in control, Angel had fallen apart in front of him on one of the worst days he’d had in a while.

And all Husk had done was put him back together again.

So it wasn’t just that he was hot, there was a hell of a lot more to it than that. And there was the fear again, souring the booze on his tongue.

“I ain’t a fan of straight talking,” Angel grunted, hunching his shoulders and spinning the now empty glass on the edge of his finger.

“Figured,” Vaggie sighed in a way that might almost suggest she actually cared, hopping down off the barstool.

She looked ready to disappear up the stairs but something made her pause, maybe the weight of their borrowed time, maybe something dangerously close to sentiment. But she did stop, reaching out and putting a hand on Angel’s shoulder.

“All I’m gonna say…I’ve been told the only way to survive this is to fight for love. Find someone you can’t live without and go out there with one goal. Protecting them.”

Like a magnet, those words drew his eyes over to Husk again. And this time, he looked back, feeling his gaze. Those narrow yellow eyes, glowing like bulbs on a marquee or LEDs tempting a sucker to a slot machine, crinkled a little at the edges, shooting the spider demon a wink.

Angel groaned inwardly at himself. He was doomed and Heaven didn’t have anything to do with it.

“Someone like me don’t even know what love is,” Angel murmured, more to himself than to Vaggie, “Might as well be speaking a different language, sugar.”

But he heard him anyway, those damn sharp ears of hers, “Then what better time to make a change?”

Before he could shield himself with sarcasm, she was gone, off up the stairs to someone who loved her. To another heartbeat against her own, arms around her, a silent promise that she was cared about, no matter what the nightmares said. Angel felt a pang in his chest, somehow finding the poor sense to want something he’d never had.

“Another drink?”

Angel dredged up a crooked grin, “Sure! Put it on my tab, I’ll come settle up with you tomorrow night.”

“Very funny,” Husk poured him a couple more shots to keep him going, though he was now without other customers.

Charlie and Vaggie had gone upstairs, Cherri had dragged Sir Pentious over to the pool table where she’d definitely crush him, Nifty was curled up in an unnervingly cat like way, sleeping on the bar and making Angel wonder if there hadn’t been a sedative jn that drink Husk made her. Alastor was who knew where, Angel only cared that Husk relaxed a lot more when he wasn’t around.

This was the best chance he was going to get.

Let’s get to living. His own words from earlier that night tried to move his mouth, tried to force him forward, tried to stop him being such a damned fucking coward and just say something…

“Actually…I think I’ll turn in,” he seized the rest of the shots in various hands and sank them one by one, trying to wash away the bitterness, “My aim gets real shitty if I don’t get my beauty sleep. And if I’m gonna die tomorrow, like hell am I going down with bags under my eyes. Did it once, never again.”

If he was the kind to hope, Angel Dust might have tried to convince himself he saw disappointment in those slitted eyes.

But Husk only gave a rolling shrug, collecting up the abandoned glasses, draining them of their last clinging dregs of amber liquid, “Funny, my luck seems to get better when I’m hungover. Sweet dreams, kid.”

Angel Dust chuckled, putting a little swing in his hips, shooting a smile over his shoulder, “Ain’t no other kind with me, baby.”

One last lie for the road.

At least he didn’t sleep at all, choosing the cloudy headed middle ground of lying back on his bed, staring at the ceiling and prodding listlessly at the ache in his chest. It was like when his tooth had been knocked out, unable to keep his tongue out of the tender, empty gap, no matter how much it made him wince. Fat Nuggets did the sleeping for both of them, snoring on Angel’s chest, every gravelly honk ruffling the feathers pink robe that always made Angel feel like he could hold it together for a few more minutes than he would without it.

He was angry at himself but that was nothing new, only the reason was old. It had been a fucking long time since he’d promised himself he was done hiding, done paring himself down because someone else wouldn’t like the taste. Lying here, feeling sorry for himself because he was too chickenshit to ask a guy to fuck him, he may as well have been back in 1940, worrying himself sick that his dad would be able to see his secret written on his face.

Well, Angel Dust wasn’t Anthony anymore. And Angel Dust was losing his goddamn patience. The worst had happened and then some, he’d lost his family, he’d lost his home, he’d lost his life but the one thing he didn’t have to do was hide anymore. Husk was down there, he’d say no or he’d say yes, either way was better than being too damn afraid to know.

And if he felt more about it, well that was his problem to deal with. It wasn’t like he was going to live much longer anyway.

Fat Nuggets squawked a little as Angel Dust sat up, displaced from his comfy position.

“Sorry, sweetie,” Angel kissed the top of his head, trying to make up for it by tucking him nicely in his own little bed, “Daddy’s got some living to do. Last minute and all but you know me.”

A quick check of his hair in the mirror, a quick fluff of the fur on his chest, like he was going down to meet some doll by his car and get swept off the the dance hall rather than going to proposition his surly friend for a quick and dirty end-of-their-afterlife fuck. But there was no harm in looking his best while he did it.

His reflection in this mirror looked a hell of a lot different than the one in his studio dressing room. There were half a hundred tiny little flaws that would have earned him a sharp, cutting comment from Valentino and maybe worse, depending on the moth’s mood. But Angel Dust didn’t think Husk would care, in fact, he seemed to get further with the guy when he went in the opposite direction to what work demanded of him. So he left them, as much as a disconnected, confused anxiety itched at him, one that hadn’t realized they weren’t at the studio.

He took a deep breath, holding his own gaze tight, “You’re a pro at this, ain’t nothing you haven’t seen before. You know the steps, boyo, curtain’s up.”

Angel went to the door of his room, feeling buoyed, feeling confident. Until, of course, he ran into something he hadn’t seen before.

At least it was soft. Though it cursed like a sailor.

“What the fuck?” Angel yelped, feathers suddenly thumping against his face.

“Will you keep your goddamn voice down, you’ll wake half the fucking hotel-”

“Husk?” Angel stepped back, blinking in confusion, “Were you…were you outside my door?”

The other demon’s irritation collapsed, fizzing away like an alka-seltzer to reveal the bitch of a hangover underneath. Expressions he’d never seen on that feline face tried unsuccessfully to hide, embarrassment and coyness and a blush barely visible under dark fur.

“Look, I…can I come in? Please?” he tacked the politeness on the end like he almost forgot it while running out the door.

“Uh…sure, hon?” Angel Dust stepped to one side, suddenly wishing he’d tidied up a little at any point since he first moved in. Or that the dildos tossed about where a more impressive size.

Husk didn’t seem to relax a little until the door was closed, until they were definitely alone. He stood awkwardly in the middle of the room, an old antique in amongst a lot of plastic and rubber, while Angel leaned against the door and wondered how he’d lost control of this so fast.

Eventually Husk sighed, tail twitching and betraying his nervousness, “Look. Feel free to tell me to take a hike here, fuck knows you’d have the right. But…I kept thinking about what Charlie said. About spending this night living how we wanted or whatever. And I…I can’t think of anything else I wanted to do but…”

Angel Dust knew he was grinning like an idiot but he couldn’t help it. It wasn’t every day you got a royal flush laid out in front of you.

“What? What is it you wanna do, Whiskers?” he tilted his head, faux innocence sparkling in his voice as he batted his eyelashes, “Anything I can help you with?”

Husk’s fur bristled and he pinched the bridge of his nose, “Fuck, I knew you’d be like this, goddamnit-”

Panic gripped him, a terrifyingly certain realization that if Husk left now, if he drove him away, he wouldn’t be able to stand it, “Wait. Sorry. I didn’t…I didn’t mean to fuck with you.”

The apology clearly caught the cat demon off guard, eyebrows rising. A small smile pulled at the edges of his mouth, “Well…guess that was the aim of my coming here…”

The grin came back, feeling more honest this time, more firmly in place. Angel stepped forward, offering one of his hands out to Husk, “Good…cos I was just on my way to ask you the same thing.”

He’d heard Husk bitch about his demon form a lot and in that moment, he could see why. Those ears and that tail were tells you could spot from a hundred miles. And right now they were telling Angel he was damn pleased.

Husk’s fingers- claws? -were calloused, whether from cards or chips or the keys of the sax he’d apparently played once upon a time. But they held Angel’s in a grip he could be certain of, one he knew instantly wouldn’t let go.

Angel had jumped on odds far worse than that.

They toppled onto the bed, swallowed by fur and silk. It took some maneuvering, making their strange forms fit but once they found it, it was fucking sweet. Suddenly there was a solid heat between his legs, something to grind into, fireworks exploding behind his eyes when he did. There was a smoky growl in his ear, a heady smell of whiskey and, fuck, Angel could have gotten drunk just off that. His hands moved of their own accord, two anchoring him to the headboard, the other two taking handfuls of soft, impossibly soft fur.

“Easy…” Husk rumbled when he pulled a little too hard.

“Sorry,” Angel Dust purred, splaying his legs wide, rolling his hips harder against Husk’s, “Just feels so good.”

Instead his hands wandered, finding where fur gave way to feather along that strong, broad back. The moment his fingers brushed there, that unfamiliar muscle, Husk jerked and moaned, the hardness in his trousers throbbing.

“Oh? Kitty liked that, huh?” Angel tittered, pressing one thumb into a hollow at the base of his wing, earning another strangled yowl.

“I swear to fuck, if you make me come in my pants like a goddamn teenager, I- fuck, baby, I’m sensitive there- ah…”

“I’d consider it a compliment, honey, don’t you worry,” Angel cooed, shivering happily at the way Husk’s chest vibrated when he touched him, like he was an instrument he could play.

“Call me old fashioned…”

Suddenly they were rolling, Angel Dust’s stomach dropping dizzily for a moment until he found himself straddling Husk, who was smirking up at him.

“But when I’m from?” he finished, voice sounding like everything amber and musk and honey in the world, “If you’re taking a fine man to bed, you let him take his pleasure first. It’s good manners, see? So how about you tell me what you want, Angel?”

Angel Dust was left with the sudden anxiety of having forgotten his next line in the script. Or worse, he’d never even fucking read it in the first place. The answer, perched miserably on the tip of his tongue was that he didn’t know.

He’d gotten too used to sex where the only thing that mattered was getting a good review, any pleasure he got was a secondary concern. He’d taught himself to like whatever his partner was willing to give, even when it called him a whore, even when it was too much, even when it hurt. The real pleasure had been the packet of powder or handful of pills that came after or before, not the sex itself.

His confusion must have shown on his face because Husk’s voice gentled, a paw coming up to lightly cup his face, “You want my mouth or my hands, baby?”

Angel Dust pushed his instincts away, “Mouth. I want you to tell me how I taste.”

Rolling again but this time, he enjoyed the free fall. Now Husk was between his legs, drawing down the sweatpants he wore to bed, just enough that he could free Angel’s dick. Angel kicked them the rest of the way off, letting Husk see all of him, legs falling open.

“Fuck…” his voice was melodic, hypnotic and hypnotized, “You look fucking gorgeous, baby…”

“And it’s all yours,” Angel panted raggedly, wrapping his long legs around Husk’s shoulders. For however long we’ve got left.

Husk’s purr sounded more like a car engine on its last legs, a rough and slightly threatening sound, but as he nosed and nuzzled at the base of Angel’s cock, it ran through his body like the best warm whiskey. In the dim light of his room, Angel could swear those spots on his wings were glowing, along with his eyes, which were fixed on Angel’s face like he was getting as much pleasure from watching him as he was from licking a broad stripe across his length.

Angel hissed, back arching up like his whole body was drawn towards that sensation, “Fuck, watch that sandpaper tongue…”

“Sorry. I’m kinda rough all over, baby,” he didn’t sound particularly sorry, flashing him a grin but he did ease up, hands taking hold of Angel’s thighs, keeping him spread wide so he could bury his face against him.

In the studio, Angel Dust had marks to hit, lines to gasp out, a camera to play up to. With Valentino, he had to make the right noises, he needed to sound scared, he needed to beg. But here, with Husk, out of reach of a script or a contract, he let moans and gasps pour heedlessly from his lips, he moved his body however it felt good. He was loud, loud enough to blow out a mic, he cursed and babbled things that didn’t make sense, he just felt .

Eventually the fur around Husk’s mouth was soaked, his jaw slack. He was good at this, unfairly good, lips and teeth and tongue all as skilled as you’d expect from someone who’d made a living by them. But now Angel Dust was the sole focus of their attention and he was drawn tight as a bow, ready to snap.

“Come for me, baby,” Husk’s rasp was almost animalistic now, “Let me hear you fucking sing.”

Angel Dust was more than happy to give him exactly what he asked for, giving a broken, soaring cry as his orgasm crashed over him, sinking him down into such an overwhelming sensation that he soon lost sight of the surface. Panic threatened but then a voice echoed to him.

“Can I kiss you?”

“Yes…” his own voice didn’t feel attached to his body so it was free to answer truthfully.

It was those lips that brought him back, a mouth that tasted of salt and opened to warmth, arms coming to circle him and anchor him down. Angel moaned, not able to care that his voice cracked unflatteringly as he did.

“Baby…”

“I got you, Angel, you did good, you tasted fucking incredible…” Husk’s wings settled over them, shielding him from the pink glow of his room.

He didn’t know how to tell him that the praise threatened to break him all over again, so Angel took charge this time, needing all four of his limbs to press the stronger demon into the mattress.

He licked the taste of his own come off Husk’s fangs and drew back just enough to gasp out, “You’re gonna fuck me so hard and so deep that if I go down tomorrow, I’m going down with your spunk inside me.”

“Of course that’s your fucking last wish,” Husk’s laugh was a gorgeous thing, a rough bark that made Angel think of smoky jazz lounges from another time.

He couldn’t help but smile, even if it was mostly bemusement, he wasn’t used to laughing during sex. It did feel pretty fucking good, he had to admit, having a genuine grin on his face as he pulled open Husk’s trousers. Though it quickly fell into awe at what jumped out and damn near smacked him in the teeth.

“Holy fuck!” Angel grinned in delight, one arm having good sense and stretching out to snag the bottle of lube in his bedside table, “Is that an overlord thing? They took the power but they let you keep the massive cock?”

“Shut up,” Husk rolled his eyes, where they snagged on the two hands now soaking their fingers and reaching around to his ass, “Mm…you’re so beautiful, you know that?”

“Heard a couple of people mention it,” Angel grinned down at him, shivering pleasantly as his hands got to work.

Husk’s eyes burned in the dim light, “Yeah. But do you know it?”

Angel Dust faltered, eyelids half closed. Another question whose answer flitted on his tongue but he didn’t want to let it go.

And again, he didn’t have to. Husk pulled him down, bending him near in half to kiss him. Unable to wait a moment more, his slicked hands grasped at Husk’s cock, drawing a hiss out of him that he gratefully swallowed. Angel sighed through the stretch and burn, sitting back and slowly, achingly slowly, every inch of Husk disappeared into him.

Angel was used to pleasures that dissolved quickly on his tongue and in his nose, leaving cold, bitter metal behind. This was something entirely new, something that felt like it was etching itself on every cell in his body, redefining words he thought he’d known inside and out. Pleasure. Sex. Need.

“Husk…” his voice was a tremulous, faint thing, like he was afraid to be heard.

“Oh, I knew you’d be like nothing else, baby…” the other demon groaned, thrusting up into him after a moment to let him settle.

There was no awkward shuffling now, they moved like a dance, like they could hear some music that didn’t exist outside of their bloodstreams. Husk’s hips rolled, Angel arched, two arms thrown up over his head, two others raking down his lover’s chest, leaving deep grooves in his fur. Before, his mouth had been occupied but now Husk sounded like- what else? -a cat in heat, yowling and gasping.

“That’s it, baby, take it, fucking take it, you feel so fucking good, Angel,” he moaned it like a title rather than just a name, like he’d done anything to deserve it.

“Aw fuck…” Angel Dust felt like he was going to shake apart, there wasn’t room inside him for all of this, he didn’t know where to put it all.

But he did know that he was about to come, hard. It was unstoppable, undeniable, and if he was half the pornstar he thought he was, Husk was on his heels. It was in the way his voice had shifted up a few notes, the way his grip on Angel’s hips had grown desperate, the break in the otherwise metronome perfect rhythm of his thrusts.

And that terrified Angel. All the fear he’d expected to find down in the bar, it thickened the air in his lungs like he’d taken an inhale from a real bad batch. Fuck, please, it can’t be over already.

But this was a fall that had to end. Husk’s hips shifted, heating that sweet spot inside him dead on and he was lost, every muscle tensing as he surrendered to his release. It was sweet and the low roar of his own name, the heat flooding so deep inside him he could damn near taste it, that was sweeter. This time when he broke, he willed himself to stay in those depths, stay in pieces, there was nothing for him on the surface.

But there was that voice again.

“Angel…fuck, that was…that was amazing, I…Angel?”

His muscles must have switched off at some point but Husk had caught him, he was sprawled out across the other demon’s chest, their bodies still joined somewhere within the lovely, thrumming haze where the rest of him used to be. But his eyes prickled, heat running down his cheek, dripping onto Husk’s fur where oh fuck no, he’d felt it…

Angel flinched back from the sting of his own tears, bringing an arm up to try and hide, like there was even any point. He rolled off Husk, hunching down as small as he’d go, shoulders trembling.

“It’s nothing, I…” What are you doing, idiot? “...don’t worry about it, it’ll stop…” Dumb fucking slut, you’re ruining it! “...just give me a second to put myself together…” Like you have any right, get a grip “I’m sorry.”

“Angel.”

He listened miserably, waiting for the creak as the bed lifted without his wait, waiting for the sound of soft paws on the floor and the click of the door closing behind him. But it never came.

“Angel, can I touch you? That alright, baby?”

He managed to nod, surprise mostly shocking his muscles into moving. There was a shift, a whisper of silk and then soft fur as strong arms wrapped around his middle, embracing him with a deliberate light touch that would let Angel pull away at any point. Another heartbeat, slowing as the adrenaline ebbed away, drummed against his back like a knock at the door.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Husk murmured against the fur between Angel’s shoulder blades.

“Nah,” Angel croaked, inhaling deeply, finding that warm whiskey smell again and relaxing, “We ain’t got the time.”

“Fair enough,” he accepted it easily, much to Angel’s relief, “Just get some sleep, okay? I’m gonna stay right here.”

He couldn’t help it, however much it made him feel like a child, “Promise?”

“Of course I promise, Angel,” there was an edge of sadness to his voice, more than the usual, not at having to say it again but at the fact that he needed to ask, “I’ll stay as long as you’ll have me. However long we got left.”

Angel smiled grimly. The second wasn’t fucking long enough to allow him the first. Just his luck to find exactly what he’d been looking for in the last few hours he had to live.

But he would take what he’d been given. Angel always had.

He turned, burying his face in Husk’s chest, feeling his rough but pleased chuckle, “Best roll of the dice I think I ever made, coming to your door…”

Angel Dust allowed himself a moment to smile at that. To feel wanted. To feel precious. Whatever happened tomorrow, he’d remember this feeling.

Whatever happened tomorrow, he wouldn’t face it alone.

#huskerdust #hazbin hotel #hazbin angel dust #hazbin husk #smut #please reblog and comment!#just a little idea of what could have happened before the finale episode

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xstevex-world · 2 years ago

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(Part 1 of the pop star Chrissy AU)

“So what you’re saying is that you are 100% positive that I’ve spent my day with, not only an actual, real life international pop sensation; but the same Chrissy Cunningham that you have been fangirling over since senior year of high school?”

Robin hears Steve groan on the other end of the line. She can't blame him though, she’s made him explain her exact situation to her 3 times over.

“Yes Robin, that’s definitely her,” he sighs.

Robin falls back down on her bed, she can’t believe this. If she had been honest with herself, that entire day felt like a fever dream, a fantasy she had conjued up from weeks of sheer boredom. It was hard to ignore, the feeling that her day shared with her was a one time thing, especially after Chrissy apologetically declined to meet up with her the next day, saying she had to do work stuff.

Thinking about it, in retrospect, the signs were there. She had absolutely talked about how she worked in music and had been travelling a lot with it recently - yeah, Robin thought she was probably in a small band or was a session musician by the way she talked so casually about it.

But this? Shit, this whole situation she's found herself in? it’s like something out of those stupid romance novels her mom and Steve like talk about.

She always had it in her head that pop stars were meant to be over the top and flashy, but Chris just seamed so…sweet. She was listened to robin ramble on and on about everything and nothing, laughed loudly at her terrible jokes before giving her perspective or talking all about her own experiences

And when she smiled? She radiated happiness and joy as if she was the personification of the sun. There would be an etching of that smile in her brain for the rest of Robin's life.

“Robin!”’ His voices takes her out of her trace, grounding her in reality. “Are you still there?”

“Yeah,” is all she mandages to say.

“So you have two options,” Steve explains, and gods, she wishes he was here so she could at least see his eyes roll at her obvious awkwardness.

“The first is you just ignore that this whole meeting ever happened,” which, yeah is she absolutely not doing. Even if she never got to meet Chrissy again, at least she would still have the memory of meetng that deity of a human being.

“Or?” She asks, hoping that even 3637 miles away, Steve would be able to bring her down from her wild panic.

“Or; you listen to me and go see her.”

Steve has always been rather blunt, it’s what Robin likes so much about him. He tells her exactly what he means, no in between meaning to his statements.

“She’s playing a concert tomorrow night in the city, it’s probably why she said she couldn’t hang out tomorrow, she has sound checks and rehearsals and stuff," he explained, as if he knew her entire schedule (what was she kidding, he probably did.) "I'm going to get you a ticket, so you go to see her tomorrow night, enjoy the show, take a photo and dm her telling her how good her performance was, ok?”

He makes it sound so simple.

“But what if I go and do all this and it turns out that-“

“She’s straight? Robs, she’s very open about being bisexual-“

“No, dingus!” She yells into the receiver, running her hand through her hair. “What if I read the entire thing wrong and she was just being nice? I’m famously not good at reading the room and, for all I know, she could have thought this was just all a friendly thing that we have going? Like, listen to me Steve, I’m me, and if she’s the same pop sensation that you’ve talked drones about for as long as I’ve known you then what could she gain with a romantic endeavour with me? She could have anyone and not the person who she met yesterday who’s…”

“Who’s what, robs?”

She can’t answer that, knows if she says what she wants to that Steve will deny it, but she knows who she is - she’s annoying, too much all the time and knows that logically she wouldn’t be anyone’s first choice in friend, let alone girlfriend.

Sometimes she thinks it’s a miracle that Steve has been her friend for as long as he has.

“I know what you’re thinking,” he interrupts her inner monologue, voice softer than she’s used to with him. “But you have to stop thinking that you’re not good enough. The only person who’s allowed to talk shit about my best friend is me…and probably Erica, but I think she thinks you’re too cool to actually insult you much.”

Robins audibly snorts, falling back onto her bed.

As hard as it was being away from her family and the rest of their little friend groupd, the thing she misses the most is Steve. She was so used to having her platonic soulmate with her at all times, ready to latch onto for whatever the reason may be.

And right now? She could really use a hug, pecifically one from Steve "The Hair" Harrington.

“Robs, just trust me, she wouldn’t have spend they day following you around Paris is she wasn’t completely gone for you - she would have been at Disneyland with Corroded Coffin getting pictures with Darth Vader and shouting about how it's a capitalist utopia while eating the churros…" he pauses momentarily, and robin knows exactly what he's going to ask next. "...actually, speaking of, did she-?"

“Talk about Eddie Munson? Well, considering that I didn’t know that it was the same Eddie that you’ve had a raging boner over for the past year despite the fact-"

“Robin!”

“It’s true!” She yells, face now beaming from her laughter. “I’ll make you a deal, Stevie, if you plan works then I’ll put in a good word with Chrissy for you, she’s bound to know what gonna bring you into Munson’s raider-"

“Robin, stop!”

"-because I have some stories, Steve, and you’re lucky I was listening because if I didn’t like Chrissy so much I know wouldn’t remember, which would suck for you because i now know a few rather scandalous stories about the guy-"

“ROBIN!” Steve shouts through the receiver, making robin jump. “Focus!”

She shuts up, smiling to herself.

“I wish you were here, dingus,” she admits, rolling onto her stomach. “At least you’d be able to help me out, maybe, if this works, make sure I don’t pass out in front of her.”

“Of course it’s going to work” he states with every syllable oozing that signature Harrington’s smugness. “But only if you wear those plaid pants you have, the ones that hug your thighs in all the right places-“

“Gross, dingus!”

But sure enough, she listens, but if Steve’s right about one thing it’s how to leave a lasting impression, especially in the “you look good” department.

So, the following evening, she dons blue, plaid pants with a plain black tank, slicks back her hair using whatever hair products Steve left during his last visit and makes up her face: brushing electric blue pigments onto her eyelids before smudging kohl against her waterline.

It takes her serval pep talks in the mirror to finally convince herself to actually leave the apartment, but she did it, managed to walk to the venue and wait, nursing her beer whilst leaning against the against the back wall.

Robin kind of regrets not tagging along to all the Chrissy Cunningham concerts that Steve invited her too in the past, maybe then she would know what to expect.

(Or, maybe then, she wouldn’t be in this exact situation, but who was she kidding, of course she would be, nothing straight forward ever happens to her).

The entire thing is overwhelming, the venue has been crowded since before she arrived, (since it was well after the opening act ended) which really isn’t her scene. She’s already nervous and her hands won't stop shaking and she's about to call it quits, text Steve that she'll pay him back for the tickets in actual money rather than their original plan and walk out the doors of the theater where she can crawl back into bed and scream into her pillow-

The lights dim, and everyone around starts screaming as the first notes of the synth play, Chrissy's voice carrying through the room.

Robin can't help but stare, she's so beautiful, stunningly gorgeous with the voice of an angel, she doesn't even notice the rest of the band join her one by one or the two dancers who have a hand on Chrissy's shoulder. She doesn't even realise the opening number has finished, can't pay attention to anything other than the cascading curls of chrissys hair, the way her body moves in one with the music, the same smile that struck her heart in the first place- the smile that shines brighter than any spotlight ever could.

She doesn't register much, barely hears anything other than Chrissy sing about new moons, staying when she shouldn't or sending her love to Wayne; songs she know she's probably heard before, probably from (just being in close proximity to steve Harrington), but none of that matters, shes memorised by her.

And when the final act is coming to a close, she almost misses it, but she can feel eyes on her even this far to the back of the crowd.

Robin only meets Eddie Munson’s eyes for a second, impossibly wide eyes staring her down in disbelief before seeing his cue to exit the stage. She almost drops her half-drank pint, a string of curses running through her head - but the whole interaction has her frozen.

Her brain tells her to "RUN! GET OUT!" before it escalates any further, the churn of pure anxiety in her stomach reminding her that this was a stupid plan, she shouldn't have come. She cant do this, won't do this-

She leaves before lights go black.

⭐💘🎫🎤🎫💘⭐

So thank you all so much for the support on the first post, I was not expecting it to get traction buy you all loved it??? My heart is swelling omfg. Thank you for being patient with me with this part (I'm dyslexic and work full time, on top of just being very slow at producing, well, anything lol).

I'm hoping to have either 5 or 6 parts altogether if you guys keep enjoying it ((sorry not sorry to make you steddie fans sit through the Buckingham part first, Robin needs to get her girl!!!))

Shout out to my gf (who's not an st fan) for beta reading this with comments like "is Robin a useless lesbian?" Or "do they really say dingus in the show?" Or "wow, she really needs some loops!"

As a bonus treat, the concert playlist can be found here! Included are songs that represent or resemble the tracks on the set list of the gig that Robin goes too see (including the CCxCC material that would be played as the encore in the final three songs)

Taglist (if you wish to be added, I just ask you be polite about it x): @maya-custodios-dionach @papermachedragons @mildgendercrisis @vampiregirl1797 @lizard-dyk3 @hellomynameismoo @beckkthewreck @eboyawstenn @justmiiriam @gregre369 @korixae @victor-thee-corvid @yes-im-your-mom @bisexualdisastersworld @questionablequeeries

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silence-between-seconds · 10 months ago

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OK NOW YOUR TURN

pls pls ramble abt any niche interest you have

HELLO THANK YOU

*invokes inner history nerd* so. listen here colonizer and listen good. i will subject you to my random knowledge cuz due to youtube, undiagnosed neurodivergency and most importantly- bad jokes. i have a vari-tea of niche interests but the first thing that came to my mind was my knowledge of the history of how Indians became one of The Top Consumers of Tea.

how did this wonder-drug make its way into our masala covered hearts? what led to the fact that everyday at 4pm the word at the tip of most indians' tongues is "chai"?this is my thesis as a pro desi tea obsessed freak.

This story, like most in our history, starts with the arrival of the British. i would like to insert this picture i found in a video that i laughed at for a solid five minutes:

anyway

technically tea was invented in china, and for a very long time it was exclusively grown there. it was a very high class commodi-tea. it was considered so precious that in 1662 when king charles the second married the Portuguese princess catherine of braganza: her dowry was a chest of tea and THE ENTIRE ISLAND OF MUMBAI (then, bombay) for an annual lease of 10 pounds. let me make that clearer. THE PLACE WHERE A 1BHK HOUSE IS SO EXPENSIVE MOST PPL CANT AFFORD WAS EQUIVALENT TO THIS:

needless to say the brits was so freaking addicted man. they wanted this. so bad.

By the 18th centuary there was a war between the english and the dutch and the brit resources were down the toilet so they couldnt afford to spend all that silver on the trade of tea leaves with china. and china was uninterested in anything the white boys were offering.

UNTIL they discovered something china wanted.

✨Drugs✨

the white boys wanted that tea. and they would do anything. so they started growing opium in india (by that time they had colonized us bruh. they came into our backyard and were like "bro we're such good friends pretty please let me use ur backyard" "ok what do you want to do w it?" "i wanna grow drugs bro" "....ok" "you'll work for me no bro?" "why would i do that" "bro its ur backyard bro" "what-" *england pulls out slavery* "SHUT UP AND DO IT") (dont come at me lmao this is a very rough simplification of what happened)(imma get blocked for this?)

anyway, brits grew opium and smuggled it to china in return for TEA. FOR TEA. 40.

now after the charter act of 1833 (idk what that is exactly but basically brits lost its trade monopoly with china and so now china said we should see other people and it was an open relationship and britian got very pissed but they signed the act anyway i think)

to deal with this they established the Tea Committee (this isnt the first government board specifically for tea. there were plen-tea of others like the Tea Board Of India) which dealt w the extraction of techniques, tea seads and resources from the chinese. this was highly unsuccessful and china was not impressed. this is an example of british desperation they'll do anything at this point. (took everything in me to not insert pictures of how they treated indian farmers. it was *inhales, lets go of anger for my ancestors treatment* bad)

but in the end this qoute i found (undoubtedly by a white man) "fortune favours the white men" came tru and they got their way.

oh you thought i was done? haha babygurl i am not

in 1843 robert fortune, who was a scottish horticulturist, went on a solo trip to china to study (read as: steal) tea plantations. no actually apparently he did study cuz he published a book(i forgot the name).(yes. HIS NAME WAS ROB. FORTUNE. talk about being born for a job)

lemme insert a quick meme here:

(they actually hired him on the spot and gave the amazed man 500 pounds per annum and sent him off to china)

he was to perform what we call The Great British Tea Heist the brits had found their vigilan-tea

my guy was committed to his role and shaved his head and pretended to be a monk and after 3 months wrote a letter to his company saying "bro i got the goodssss"

lmao no this it what the letter said- "l have much pleasure in informing you," he wrote, "that I have procured a large supply of seeds and young plants which l trust will get safely to India."

NOW they finally had the greens and started planting it in india. over the years indian tea topped the market in britian as the best tea. mostly cuz the white boyz HYPED it up. they even started doing diss tracks for chinese tea. this is something read right out of an advertisment- "indian teas are more wholesome, purer, cheaper and better than chinese teas in every single way". white boyz started saying stuff like they got out of a toxic realtionship with china and a healthy one with india (but they were the toxic ones)

now brits tried to globalize indian tea to get the moneyyy~ from indians.

their first experiment with (another) government body for tea- Indian Tea Association began on the indian railways. these railways were the ancestor of the IRC-tea-C. basically they started making tea on the railway platforms. this started the trend of tea being the signature experience on every indian train journey, from the first class to economy, everyone was having it (cuz trains were introduced and quickly became popular in use). train tea was said to be better than the quality of tea in 5 star hotels. and this converted us from a nation of tea-totalers to teach addcits.

now i just have one thing to say in the end. HOW did the quality decline so badly my desi brothers and sisters? nowadays the tea on trains is basically water but brown. milk is a lie.

anyway. on the end we got it right. we took tea from the chinese and brits and we added milk and we added sugar and we got:

✨chai✨

you have reached the end. congrats.

#siri goes insane #asks #history #of tea #tea #chai #desiblr #most of these jokes were made by other people #pls dont come at me if you have heard them b4 #it is not my responsibili-tea #great britian #what were you doing #what goes on #lmao

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landofzero-archive · 10 months ago

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Absolute - The Pure Land 8

(Location: Absolute Stage)

(Nearly an hour later. Inside the venue of Absolute.)

Jun: Ooh—

Hey, there’s some kinda flashy stage being built~? There wasn’t anything like that here yesterday though?

Hiyori: Because it’s almost the time for Absolute to begin. See, there’s already a huge audience, as many as the eyes can see.

NEGI: “Thanks to that, the highway was congested, it was a hard time getting to this place…… Ugh, my best set of clothes is drenched in sweat.”

Ibara: Yes. It’s just as expected.

However this is difficult, this crowding makes searching for someone—

Nagisa: —Are you looking for someone?

Ibara: —

Your Excellency.

Hiyori: Nagisa-kun!? Eeeeh, we found you even without needing to look for you!

Why are you here? Where have you been and what have you been doing up till now? I’ve been so worried—

………

Jun: Ohiisan? What’s going on with you~ What’s up with that face, you’re looking like you’ve seen an alien?

Hiyori: ……… Who?

Jun: Huh? Who, you said– do you have amnesia or something? No matter which way you look at him, it’s Nagi-senpai……?

No, huh? Now that you’ve mentioned it, something feels weird somewhere……?

Ibara: Hmm hmm. I see, so this means he has turned into a different person after undergoing the terrifying experience that is kidnapping. Poor soul.

Did you think that’s what I’d say? Who are you? What you’re doing right now is an infringement of the right to using someone’s likeness; it’s a crime.

Nagisa?: ………

NEGI: “Could it be Shaka-san?

You’re Shaka-san, aren’t you? You can’t fool my eyes, who do you think did the procedure on you?”

Nagisa?: Ahahahahahaha.(1)

Ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha.(1)

NEGI: “……!?”

Shaka: That’s amazing. You might have just tricked me into revealing the truth, but I didn’t think you would find me out this quickly.

I should not have just practiced on-stage performances, but I should have practiced genuine acting on top of that.

No, but still, did you all realize my true identity?

I envy you, brother. I see I see, because you’re holding in your arms something so precious and brilliant, it’s only natural that money and reputation could not bring out your interest.

Ibara: Where’d you take His Excellency to?

What “I”(2) will do to you depends on your answer—

Shaka: Rest assured. Right now, he’s in the safest place in the world.

However, nobody would think of the him in there as Ran Nagisa.

NEGI: “……Did you steal his existence?

And then you took over? Was that your purpose, Shaka-san?”

Shaka: Indeed, my friend. (3) I have captured and confined Ran Nagisa and remodeled myself using Priest’s technique.

And then we exchanged forms with one another, and in this way replaced each other.

I have obtained that child’s life.

As a reward for that, I bestowed my life upon that child.

Isn’t it a good deal? With this, he can become the world’s number one idol without any hardships—

Ibara: Even if you didn’t bestow it upon him.

His Excellency is, we are, planning to reach “there” with our own strength sooner or later.

Shaka: Ahaha. You said the same thing he said. You have such a close relationship. It’s heartwarming.

You guys are pretty cute. I enjoy your cherubic mannerism and reactions.

Jun: GODDAMN! Ibara, it’s okay to rough up this guy, yeah~? Just this once, me and Ohii-san will pretend we didn’t see anything!

Hiyori: —It’s no good.

Jun: Huh? Wh-why is that, Ohii-san?

Shaka: That child over there is prudent.

Let’s imagine it. Indeed, I am a criminal. For example, yes, let’s say I’ve cheated and robbed a bank out of a large amount of money

At this rate, I might get arrested by the police. So that I could escape safely, I should take hostages.

Jun: Gotcha, so in this situation, Nagi-senpai is the one being held hostage……!?

Hiyori: Yes. Until we can safeguard Nagisa-kun without incident, there is no way we can erase this guy who is the only one who knows where that child is.

So Ibara, I know you’re probably irritated, but please refrain from going on a rampage.

Ibara: Yes, I would not have done so even if you didn’t tell me that, Your Highness.

TL Notes:

1. Please don’t worry. Mod counted the ‘Ha’s for this.

2. Ibara’s using his very rare personal pronoun 俺 (Ore), which is a rude, typically masculine personal pronoun. He usually uses 自分 (Jibun) which is an impersonal, somewhat militaristic way of referring to oneself.

3. Just so you know he said そうとも,友よ (Soutomo, tomoyo).

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#ensemble stars #enstars #enstars translation #ibara saegusa #jun sazanami #hiyori tomoe #negi kurone #shaka enstars #era: !!#type: event

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lewisinho · 1 year ago

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felipe massa and the championship that got away: an analysis

prompted mostly by massa pissing me off so bad with his campaign of misinformation (like bro sue the weather while you’re at it); this involved rewatching absolute disasterclasses and a few snoozefests during my free wednesday (the weather was terrible as well so took the time to refresh my memory on some of the less memorable 2008 races and compile this mess) and my eyes were bleeding so please show some love

ok, so on a more serious note, he wasn’t absolutely dreadful (apart from in the wet); my biggest issue is that we probably don’t know just how good that 2008 ferrari really was; in the hands of someone with much better quali/race pace it could probably have dominated much more strongly; i think his performance was quite average considering the potential the car had; he had some brilliant weekends as well, but i think they are quite significantly overshadowed by the dreadful ones; then again, 2008 wasn’t lewis’ best season either, and this analysis isn’t really to compare the two, it’s mostly to showcase that massa’s assertion of it being a ‘perfect’ championship isn’t quite true…is all this necessary? ofc not, but i’m going to have some fun with it anyhow;

i also made this because the concept of ‘deserving’ something is one i deeply deeply despise in sport; the only thing you can bring to the table with such discourse is your own subjective opinion; you win or you don’t, end of; you can, of course, be robbed of something when a rule is indeed broken, but the concept of ‘deserving a championship due to how you performed over the course of a season’ is frankly stupid; and do i think massa was robbed? no. he can’t prove that crashgate was the very thing that cost him the championship because it conveniently ignores everything else that happens afterwards. there’s a clear break in the chain of causation. he neither ‘deserves’ it in my opinion, nor was he robbed of it and i also don’t like the historical revisionism he’s campaigning for either so here’s a full rundown of felipe massa’s season (i tried to be as impartial as i could in this):

top 2 in the driver’s standings (included only for the sake of completeness, please don’t cite toto’s 'wikipedia statistics' quote at me):

some background information:

the 2008 championship comes right after the spygate shitshow of the previous season; fernando alonso leaves mclaren for renault after one year; heikki kovalainen replaces him to drive alongside lewis hamilton at mclaren; felipe massa and kimi raikkonen (the reigning world champion) are teammates at ferrari (kimi’s 2008 season is also interesting to revisit considering the internal ferrari politics at play but i’ll save it for a different time); it's an eighteen race season, and for this season traction control has been banned! (it's important to mention considering the ban had been brought up several times over the season as a reason to explain some of felipe's performances considering he had never driven a formula one car without traction control before);

moreover, the fia’s decision-making this season was questionable to say the least; this is obviously not felipe's fault ofc, but there were a few decisions which he had certainly benefited from at lewis’ expense (spa comes to mind…);

2008 scoring system quick refresher: p1: 10 points, p2: 8 pts, p3: 6 pts; scoring only up to eighth place;

for the race results i will only include the top 3 as well as lewis if he finishes off the podium; for the championship standings i will include the top 3 in the championship as they were after every race (+ HAM/MAS/RAI if they were outside) and on how many points they were after every race;

australian gp (0 points, dnf)

bit of an embarrassing start tbh…massa qualifies p4 but spins in the first corner of the first lap all on his own and hits the barrier; he manages to get back into the pits though and get a front wing change; however, on lap 26 he collides with DC when trying to overtake him; DC retires, but massa continues only to retire from an engine failure a few laps later; pretty shit start to the season

race result: lewis hamilton p1, nick heidfeld p2, nico rosberg p3 (the infamous brocedes podium btw)

malaysian gp (0 points, dnf)

much better qualifying, ferrari clearly has pace as massa qualifies on pole, with raikkonen in p2; however on lap 31 felipe spins off and gets trapped in the gravel; this race was a masterclass from kimi btw, he won by nearly twenty seconds from kubica in p2; also before massa crashed, kimi also managed to get ahead of felipe in the first round of pit stops after pitting a lap after felipe by producing a brilliant in-lap

race result: kimi raikkonen p1, robert kubica p2, heikki kovalainen p3 (lewis p5- qualifying penalty for impeding drivers in quali and had started p8 + slow pitstop by mclaren in the race)

championship standings: HAM (14 points), RAI (11), HEI (11) + MAS (0)

bahrain gp (10 points, p1)

it’s kubica on pole (who i also need to mention because he arguably was the best driver of the 2008 season) and massa starts p2; felipe overtakes kubica in the first corner and then maintains the lead for the rest of the race; very good performance for him and good bounce-back from the first two races

race result: felipe massa p1, kimi raikkonen p2, robert kubica p3 (lewis p13- bit of a disaterclass from him this time around, as he went into anti-stall at the start due to going into a wrong engine mode and dropped positions; he then drives right into the back of fernando’s renault and had to get a nose change, dropping him to p18)

championship: RAI (19), HEI (16), HAM (14) + MAS (10)

spanish gp (8 points, p2)

ferrari are dominating the past few races and the same happens in spain; kimi pole, felipe p3; massa overtakes alonso at the start and it's a ferrari 1-2 procession to the end basically; the race was basically sorted with the overtakes made at the start; also a literal snoozefest;

race result: kimi raikkonen p1, felipe massa p2, lewis hamilton p3

championship: RAI (19), HAM (20), KUB (19) + MAS p4 (18)

turkish gp (10 points, p1)

actually a pretty good race from massa; starts on pole and wins the race; lewis comes in second, executing a three-stopper (arguably this strategy cost mclaren the chance of fighting for the win but they were worried about tyres…still i think, a bit on the conservative side from mclaren in terms of strategy and considering lewis’ amazing pace relative to massa bit of a missed opportunity)

race result: felipe massa p1, lewis hamilton p2, kimi raikkonen p3

championship: RAI (35), MAS (28), HAM (28)

monaco gp (6 points, p3)

wet monaco and absolute chaos! (great race to rewatch btw); massa qualified on pole, but then lost the lead because of a mistake in the wet; lewis wins, and also brilliant race by kubica;

race result: lewis hamilton p1, robert kubica p2, felipe massa p3

championship: HAM (38), RAI (35), MAS (34)

canadian gp (4 points, p5)

massa qualifies p6, ferrari fuel rig problem in the pit lane meant he dropped down to p17; he fights back to p5; and because hamilton crashed into raikkonen in the pit lane, he managed to outscore the both of them that weekend; also robert wins! relative to the others, a pretty good weekend for massa;

race result: robert kubica p1, nick heidfeld p2, david coulthard p3 (every time i remember DC raced in 2008 it’s like a shock to my system)

championship: KUB (42), MAS (38), HAM (38) + RAI, p4 (35)

french gp (10 points, p1)

again, ferrari are pretty much dominating in quali; kimi takes pole, felipe p2; it was kimi’s race to win and he was comfortably leading however he then had to slow down due to his car suffering from an exhaust pipe breaking and hence, loss of engine power; felipe therefore, inherits the lead and wins the race;

race result: felipe massa p1, kimi raikkonen p2, jarno trulli p3 (lewis- p10, he had to take a grid drop for the incident in the pitlane in canada when he ran into the back of kimi; in the race he has to serve a drive-through penalty for cutting a corner and gaining an advantage)

championship: MAS (48), KUB (46), RAI (43) + HAM, p4 (38)

british gp (0 points, p13)

eyeee think this race is best summarised with pictures? allow me:

an all-timer of a race, lewis hamilton masterclass;

race result: lewis hamilton p1, nick heidfeld p2, rubens barichello p3

championship: HAM (48), MAS (48), RAI (48)

german gp (6 points, p3)

massa qualified p2 alongside lewis; this is one of lewis’ best drives of the season i think; he was leading the race comfortably in the beginning stages, pulling away from felipe like crazy (he gained 1.8 sec in the first lap, had a 3.7 sec lead by lap 4, 11 sec by lap 18, clearly on a mission); mclaren don’t pit him under safety car when everyone else around him does, so he has eight laps to build a large gap before having to eventually pit himself; he does on lap 50 and overtakes massa and piquet jr for the win (some really nice overtakes btw); massa really just didn’t have the pace to compete;

race result: lewis hamilton p1, nelson piquet jr p2, felipe massa p3

championship: HAM (58), MAS (54), RAI (51)

hungarian gp (0 points, p17/dnf)

this one was bad luck because massa suffered an engine failure when leading the race; it would have probably been his best win of his career had he not dnf'ed- good overtake on lewis at the start

race result: heikki kovalainen p1, timo glock p2, kimi raikkonen p3 (lewis- p5, suffered a tyre puncture on lap 40; tbf the early seasons also show lewis is still learning about tyre management and that he’s still prone to overcooking his tyres making them vulnerable to punctures)

championship: HAM (62), RAI (57), MAS (54)

european gp (10 points, p1)

qualifies on pole and wins the race; he nearly manages to crash into sutil when released into the pit lane after his pit stop; the team is charged with 10,000 euros after the race but felipe keeps his win (it would be dealt with so differently these days lmao but can’t really blame him)

race result: felipe massa p1, lewis hamilton p2, robert kubica p3

championship: HAM (70), MAS (64), RAI (57)

belgian gp (10 points, p1)

this race still makes my blood boil; funnily enough felipe wins after not leading a single lap in this race! lewis gets handed a 25-second penalty by the stewards and gets demoted to p3; quick recap: lewis tried to pass kimi at the bus stop chicane, but he cut the corner and got into the lead; he allowed kimi to re-pass him because he gained an advantage by going off track; but smartly, he passes kimi again at la source; post-race he’s handed a penalty; mclaren then appeal and say that charlie whiting himself said that lewis had given the place back to kimi completely legally; thing is, charlie isn’t the stewards, who say that lewis didn’t give kimi enough of an advantage; it causes a bit of a storm in the media, niki lauda goes off and calls it the ‘worst judgment in the history of f1’; thing is, it's a really grey area, to some extent i can understand the stewards’ reasoning, but the severity of the punishment is absolutely ridiculous and also points to how inconsistent the fia is...handing him 25 seconds just doesn’t fit the crime at all; (also the last four laps are just pure drama in general! worth a watch);

(if i had a nickel for every time felipe massa got handed a lucky win in 2008, i’d have two nickels. which isn’t a lot, but it’s weird it happened twice)

race result: felipe massa p1, nick heidfeld p2, lewis hamilton p3

championship: HAM (76), MAS (74), KUB (58) + RAI, p4 (57)

italian gp (3 points, p6)

bit of a disasterclass, qualifies p6, finishes p6; but funnily enough, he still finished ahead of both kimi and lewis as the both of them were sent out on the wrong tyres in qualifying and only managed to qualify p14 and p15; btw beautiful overtakes by lewis (he finished p7- just one place behind felipe); also seb wins!

race result: sebastian vettel p1, keikki kovalainen p2, robert kubica p3

championship: HAM (78), MAS (77), KUB (64) + RAI, p4 (57)

singapore gp (0 points, p13)

crashgate! he gets pole (quite an impressive pole lap i must admit) and leads the race until piquet jr crashes, and felipe pits, ferrari release him too early and he drives off with the fuel hose still attached to his car…to that i say, maybe sue your pit crew as well

race result: fernando alonso p1, nico rosberg p2, lewis hamilton p3

championship: HAM (84), MAS (77), KUB (64) + RAI, p4 (57)

japanese gp (2 points, p7)

now this one is a disasterclass on all fronts, but if you want drama i recommend watching it; felipe qualified p5; he managed to crash into hamilton and got himself a drive-through penalty; he also tangled with bourdais when attempting to overtake him on lap 50; bourdais was blamed for it and got a 25-second penalty after the race; thing is, i don’t see how it’s only bourdais’ fault tbh? massa squeezed bourdais as he attempted to pass him going into the first corner and bourdais couldn’t just disappear…anyway the decision to penalise bourdais was criticised a lot, also considering that penalising him went against charlie whiting’s pre-race direction that the car exiting the pit-lane has the right of way (which bourdais was);

race result: fernando alonso p1, robert kubica p2, kimi raikkonen p3 (lewis hamilton- p12, bit of a disasterclass from him as well)

championship: HAM (84), MAS (79), KUB (72) + RAI, p4 (63)

chinese gp (8 points, p2)

qualifies p3, behind lewis and kimi; lewis comfortably leads the race and wins it fifteen seconds ahead of p2; massa finished second after raikkonen is instructed to let him through (ferrari team orders, bit of a deja vu)

race result: lewis hamilton p1, felipe massa p2, kimi raikkonen p3

championship: HAM (94), MAS (87), KUB (75) + RAI, p4 (69)

brazilian gp (10 points, p1)

ahead of the last race of the season, massa could still win the title if he wins the race and lewis finishes p6 or lower; massa did all he could: he got pole and won the race; mclaren opted for an incredibly conservative strategy in the race (they only needed to secure p5, and considering how they lost the title only the year before, it’s explicable): for e.g. waiting for a relatively long time to get lewis off the inters when it began to dry during the first part of the race;

race result: felipe massa p1, fernando alonso p2, kimi raikkonen p3 (lewis- p5 and world champion!)

championship: HAM (98), MAS (97), RAI (75); shoutout to robert kubica who had an absolutely amazing season and who also finished on 75 points, but ended up p4 on countback.

hope this was somewhat informative :)

#lewis hamilton #felipe massa #2008 f1 world championship #f1 #crashgate

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gaynfl · 7 months ago

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(((I remember that the last time I sent you on of these, it was the beginning of May and now here were are at the last day of July sooooo...!!)))

✨🌈Good News!!🌈✨

-My siblings and I grew up listening to lots of 90's & early 2000s country music, which includes one of the all time greats, Mr. Alan Jackson!! Anyway, he recently announced that he's gonna go on one FINAL tour before retiring from Tour Life so OF COURSE I HAD to get tickets for the three of us to go see him in concert!!! He's not performing in our state but...!! We are gonna have such a fun lil' sibling roadtrip to get to the neighboring state that he is performing in 🤩🔥💯💞

-Recently, I bought myself the Barbie version of Monopoly!! 💖🛼🎲🏠

-I also saw this SICK light up Razor scooter and was like, "Well, why not?!" and so I decided to get it!! I've been busy and have yet to assemble her, but just know that she's silver & fuchsia and has a LOT of lights!!

-Last Friday (July 26th) when I was getting ready to leave work and go home, I discovered that my car had a flat tire!! 😩😭👎🏻 However, I called my Aunt who has a portable air compressor and she came to assist me!! She then drove behind me to make sure that I was gonna make it out to my car guy and I did!! :D

-On top of that, the car guy was able to find the nail in said tire and repaired it all in the same day, even though he was busy and mine was an unscheduled drop off!! 🙌🏻🤩💯🔥💗

-Julian Edelman's podcast, Games with Names, always releases new episodes on Tuesdays. Well on Tuesday, July 2nd, Julian and his production team released a special Q & A episode, where they listened to various voicemails left by fans of the show. You already know that I have called their hotline to ask a bunch of short, random questions!! ❤️💛💙

-One of the questions I asked was if he (Julian) thinks that he will ever make movies & shows with Rob (Gronkowski) now that they are both officially retired. I never ever thought that they would pick one of my goofy ass questions BUT THEY DID and that's the one they choose!!! 😱🤯😳🫡🤩🥳💓

-So!! That was very cool and because I didn't say my name, they identified me as an "Acting Coach", which made me chuckle <3 Also!! As soon as my question got done playing, Julian IMMEDIATELY answered, "Well, I sure hope so!" before saying a little more about how much he loves & wants to do more projects with Rob. 🥺🥹😭🤧🥰

-Now, on a completely different note: I've been pushing myself out of my comfort zone with my writing lately, which is great because it's good to explore different aspects of storytelling!! My format/structure has basically stayed the same, but I've decided to try different perspectives and get more into other areas that are just as exciting to me what some of my old faithfuls have been!!!

-And finally, last but not least: Tom (Brady)'s 47th birthday is this Saturday, August 3rd!!! ♌🦁 It's gonna be fun to see what kinds of things people post about him, especially after all of the things he's been through this summer (the roast, his Patriots Hall of Fame Induction Ceremony, etc.). 👀🎉🎂🎇🎁🎈🎊🎆

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Alright!! That's all for right now ☺️💜

I hope that this message along with the others have lifted your spirits a little and that you find at least one thing to be happy about on August 2nd. (: 🫂🌻💞

rachel next time you do this can you PLEASE tell me how long it takes you to do all of the colors this is so impressive every time

also my car ALSO has some tire issues it's so frustrating i need to get mine fixed s;lakjdf

#askbox #youngeditor1999 #moots

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dreamcatch22 · 3 months ago

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Top Albums of 2024

It’s time for one of my end-of-the-year traditions where I look back on my favorite records released this past year. 2024 has been quite a year for me regarding concerts. I have not been to this many shows since college, and I made every second count. It’s never easy narrowing down some of my favorite highlights, so here we go.

I flew up to Maine to see Judas Priest back in April. 50 years and 19 albums later, Judas Priest has not slowed down its heavy metal velocity at all. At the young age of 73, Rob Halford can still wail like a menacing banshee. In August, I went on another adventure out to Montana to see grunge legends, Pearl Jam. It was one of the best homecomings that I have attended. People of all ages were packed inside Washington-Grizzly Stadium singing along to every song Pearl Jam played, including the most recent hits. Eddie Vedder is still a classy, down-to-earth front man, who told us amusing anecdotes in between some tracks. I celebrated Halloween earlier than usual and caught L.A. punk rockers, X, on their farewell tour at Iron City. Of course, I wore a costume to this show, and I decided to dress up as Liam Gallagher of Oasis. After this punk rock jamboree, John Doe, X's co-founder, stayed on the floor and conversed with some fans. When I briefly met him, he studied my costume. Once I clarified that I am Liam Gallagher, he noddingly approved of my creativity. Speaking of Liam Gallagher, a major purchase of mine was successfully completed. By the bare skin of my teeth, I got tickets to see Oasis live in both Edinburgh, Scotland and East Rutherford, New Jersey next summer. Liam and Noel, I am expecting you boys to behave and get along so that I can see you live from across the pond at Murrayfield Stadium and in my home country at MetLife Stadium. Please keep that hatchet buried and let bygones be bygone. In the wise words of you, Noel Gallagher, don’t look back in anger. Amidst all the shows that I attended, I also want to tip my hat to Gojira for performing “Mea Culpa (Ah! Ça ira!)” as a part of the Olympics opening ceremony in Paris, France. Well, 2024 will be a tough year to top when it comes to concert attendance.

Here are my top ten albums of 2024:

1. Brat by Charli XCX

*This selection also includes Brat and It's Completely Different but Also Still Brat.

2. Manning Fireworks by MJ Lenderman

3. You Won’t Go Before You’re Supposed To by Knocked Loose

4. Prelude to Ecstasy by The Last Dinner Party

5. Only God Was Above Us by Vampire Weekend

6. Where’s My Utopia? by Yard Act

7. A Dream Is All We Know by The Lemon Twigs

8. The Collective by Kim Gordon

9. Romance by Fontaines D.C.

10. The Thief Next to Jesus by Ka

Here are my honorable mentions:

- The Sky Will Still Be There Tomorrow by Charles Lloyd

- Britpop by A.G. Cook

- Absolute Elsewhere by Blood Incantation

- Diamond Jubilee by Cindy Lee

- Songs of a Lost World by The Cure

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chaserainbows · 4 months ago

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Reunion

(yes fearghas gets to come back this time)

our iconic top 3 diantha iris and may has one more thing to do before the grand finale where one of them will be crowned a winner

incidentally lynn will be the one to pass them the crown because she won season 5

their job this episode is to

sit on a couch and watch the others perform

for the reunion we'll have another lipsync tournament but this time between the eliminated contestants so that one of them will be crowned the lipsync assassin of the season

will agni win again

also i'm not sure if iris would be happy or mad as hell that she's the only person who missed out on both lipsync tournaments

our first duo is fearghas and akari l

whatever injury it is that he got he's fully healed now and ready to prove that he was eliminated WAY before his time

as for akari l she didn't get a lot of opportunities to shine this season so she's ready to reclaim her moment in the spotlight

only one will prevail though

youtube

also i don't really like this song so we'll be replacing it with something superior

FEARGHAS WINS THE FIRST LIPSYNC

he is a PERFORMER

akari l doesn't win but she's a legend and the moment who got her cool photoshoot in ep1

the other akari miss akari y our frontrunner is next and she goes up against grusha in a rematch

last time grusha actually beat her but she stayed anyway because she was way better than him in the competition so they both have something to prove against each other

youtube

artpop gaga my robbed mother

AKARI YOSUGA THE QUEEN SETTLES THE SCORE SHE COULD BEAT GRUSHA AFTER ALL

do not underestimate her she has 3 wins for a reason

grusha does not win the tournament but with the power of hate on his side we know he will always prevail

incidentally last time grusha won the lipsync tournament in the reunion so he'll be passing his crown too

the winner of the lipsync tournament earlier this season THEEEE agni is here and they will be facing off against saundra next

this is actually a rematch saundra was the first victim of agni's slayage

youtube

this is groovy will agni's unstoppable rampage (except for may that one time) continue or will saundra win this rematch

SAUNDRA WINS THE SCORE IS SETTLED

agni doesn't win this tournament but they already won the other one so lol lmao

that leaves anabel and lynn our queens from ultra space

lynn may not have done her best effort this season but do not underestimate her because it's when she's underestimated that her powers are supreme

anabel's lipsync track record is a little shaky this season (she doesn't remember older songs after all but she DOES know charli xcx) but she has something to prove after getting eliminated in a lipsync where she actually won

incidentally lynn's curse affected anabel and made her fall so we will see how this goes

youtube

this is such a good song will lynn win with her dance skills or will anabel outperform her with the power of Vibes

OUR REIGNING QUEEN WINS SHE'S DONE PLAYING AROUND

anabel does not win this tournament but she actually made a few friends over the course of this competition so that's a win for her

this actually makes me realize that lynn and saundra's icons go so well together here

the girlypops will BATTLE in the semifinals of the tournament will lynn's previous excellence in lipsyncs prevail or will saundra do something completely unexpected

youtube

the lipsync song is no tears left to cry giratina's favorite song because the music video looks like something straight out of the distortion world so of course this battle will be DEMONIC

LYNN WINS AGAIN THE REIGNING QUEEN IS NOT LEAVING WITHOUT A CROWN

saundra loses here at the semifinals but she made a very good impression during her short time in the competition and her french flag track record is very chic

BUT DON'T WORRY MISS SAUNDRA YOUR BROTHER IS HERE TO REPRESENT

fearghas goes up against akari y which is funny because this means that both of his lipsyncs have been against the akaris

only one of them can make it to the finals, will it be fearghas in his goal to prove that he is in fact that bitch or will it be akari y to prove that getting eliminated by iris means nothing and she's STILL the queen

youtube

THIS IS A BOPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP

i love that there's been like 3 janet jackson songs this season it's what she deserves

it has some rock vibes so it definitely means more towards fearghas but akari y is a LEGEND so we shall see

FEARGHAS WINS THE LIPSYNC

HE HAS MADE THE FINALS NO ONE CAN STOP HIM

akari y gets eliminated here but like she HAS proved herself just look at her track record

our top 2 is decided

on one side we have lynn our reigning champion and previously undefeated lipsync assassin who has something to prove after taking it easy all season she won a lipsync tournament and she will do it again

on the other side we have fearghas who proved his talent as a performer and got unfairly removed from the competition before we could fully see him shine, he will claim this crown to show that he's the one

there can be only one winner though but first let's get THE MUSIC

youtube

that song was a FLOP so we're getting something directly from the fearghas playlist because this song is so good

LYNN SLAYS TOO MUCH AND NOW HER HAIR'S LOOKING A HOT MESS OH NO

the winner of the reunion lipsync tournament and grusha's successor as queen of she done already done had herses IS

LYNN MAKANA THE IMMORTAL GIRLYPOP DOES IT AGAIN

fearghas is our runner up but make no mistake he's an INCREDIBLE performer and the only one able to stop him is literally the best of the best

the actual final episode will be tomorrow we have enough clownery today

#ooc #amano's drag race #Youtube

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