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#on one hand it's like ''tf it isnt my fault i was literally crying for hours'' but on the others it's like ''damn who tf cared i was
angeltism · 8 months
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i get the everyone leaving you for mental health issues thing if it helps you aren’t alone
this is very sweet, anon. i really appreciate it, i hope you're doing well and being kind to yourself as much as possible <3 /p
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midnighteloquence · 2 days
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watashi wa jisatsu shitaidesu
ignore whatever that means its a /nsrs
anyways! lets talk about why i no longer like friend d!
so im gonna split this rant into TWO PARTS!
Part A: things ive noticed myself/seen first hand
okay number one! they said that theyre diagnosed with bipolar, which THEY ARENT. first off, diagnosis are expensive asf no matter what youre trying to diagnose and im not being mean at all but just saying theyre on the free lunches plan soo, two diagnosis takes agessss and they just so happen to suddenly have one??
number two, theyll shit talk like everyone. i only started noticing recently that most of what comes out of their mouth is shit talk. and its fine if you have a lot to say about shitty people but then you immediately talk to them again as if you didnt just say you want to curb stomp them?? it gets confusing and ngl is really bitchy
number three! milked tf out of the fact that one of their friends said they might be autistic. which no. autism isnt something you should milk for attention!! and like the only symptoms they have are the depressive ones which USUALLY should lead you to believe that maybe you just have depression? idk im not a psychologist
on that note, they want to be a psychologist, yet doesnt understand why people act the way they do (like theyll shittalk people for things they cant fucking control) and also has rheir own problems? this would most likely be even more self destructive right? to have to solve others mental health before your own? idk im just thinking
also also they seem to care more about getting into relationships (AT THE AGE THEYRE AT) than grades which uh. yes i am literally on my knees yearning for a relationship but also at least im actually doing school and excelling academically ✌️
plus dont you gotta do good at school to be a psychologist?? thats like a really hard subject
Part B: things ive been told
this part is where it gets more blurry, since some isnt backed up (but most is dw!)
they dated C two years ago and used to do freaky shi to them at the back of the bus (make out, cuddle, touch thighs, etc), which a friend of ours i’ll call F saw first hand! um ew.
they trauma dumped on C first things first which uh
C and F would sit with each other a lot and talk alotttt because theyre both neurodivergent and nd people tend to go well and D got all pissy and like “me when my friends leave me out..” and so to shut them up (shut me up? by msi?) F told them that they might be autistic and they started milking tf out of it
told a bunch of people that C sa’d them which C did not! also told F that C’s sa story was fake and that C mentally and physically abused them (there are screenshot proof of D saying this btw!)
told people that im not autistic and that im faking it because im self diagnosed which THEY LITERALLY ARE + IVE DONE COUNTLESS HOURS OF RESEARCH ON AUTISM LEAVE ME ALONE
something ive noticed but isnt it weird that all their relationships lasted only a couple months? kinda says something
would manipulate people into taking their side by saying “oh dw its my fault not theirs!”
on that note their recent partner broke up with them AND GAVE A WHOLE ASS GOOGLE DOC ABOUT WHY WITH AMAZING EXPLANATIONS + SAYS A THOUSAND TIMES THAT IT ISNT THEIR FAULT, but C twisted it to make them the bad guy which tf he has the best moral compass of everyone ik stfu
jokes alot about substance abuse (which they do btw) but it just gets like “what am i supposed to say?”
ON THAT NOTE OF NOT KNOWING WHAT TO SAY they texted F that they tried killing themselves and F responded with an “oh” because tf are rhey supposed to say to that?? (F told me that they were literally crying when they saw that)
was a terrible friend to F, F noticed and cut off ties (good for them!! They have so much courage because i could legit never i love them for that 💪💪) and then they proceeded to send a lengthy apology which was all bs btw!
ive been told that they faked their trauma, substance abuse, and their eating disorders, but tbh im not sure if that’s true or not (considering ive seen texts theyve gotten from their mum about eating)
minor but they say theyre goth but dont even listen to the music which is the whole point! and also doesnt follow the political opinions of goth!
(did the same with punk, btw!)
not sure if true or if C said this to save their own ass but apparently D got C to shit talk me (i talked about in an earlier rant) which errr…
Secret Part C: small details
this section is in bullet points!
insulted F “jokingly” to the point they had huge gender dysphoria
thought F had a crush on their bf (at the time) when F’s literally a lesbian
not only a pathological liar but a inconsistent one!
okay this is kinda hypocritical but they follow sh blogs that show cvts
+ says the cuts are cute (which is something i dont do. i actually dont even follow them but from time to time i’ll scroll through and want to vomit /nav)
literally gave me a step by step tutorial on how to purge
not lying!
complained about their bf not kissing them in public (which is something you talk to your bf about not me! + boundaries fucking exist?)
very minor but alot of the stuff they like its mostly because it got popular on tt
will say shit like “ive only been catcalled like three times in this outfit!” which no ew + gave me a massive insecurity that im not pretty enough! choose your words wisely!
so to sum it all up theyre a terrible human being and im glad i dont talk to them anymore! thanks for reading this lengthy post!
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the-dumbest-po3-au · 5 years
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part 4 - the dumbest po3 au
its been. nine. montsh im SO SORRY GUYS LMAO
for those of you who dont know what the dumbest po3 au is, click this link
for those of you who have not read the summaries for power of three, part 1 - part 2 - part 3
alright!!!!!!! dovewing time
the fourth apprentice
the book opens w/ ivykit and dovekit in the nursery. ivykit suggests going out to explore the territory and dovekit is like “wow. that sounds like a fantastic idea ivykit you are so smart"
whitewing says No Absolutely Not, and leaves at some point to go make dirt. they sneak out and not 5 minutes later they get lost. dovekit gets blames ivykit for suggesting it and they get into a fight. they both get really mad & dovekit runs off. because shes like a stupid 2 year old gets distracted, rams her head into a rock and passes out. rip dovekit. she wakes up and sees a fox kit coming towards her. she screams.
her head hurts and shes tired and now shes going to die. out of nowhere a huge cat beats up the fox and scares it away. dovekit passes out (again)
when she wakes up, she is next to a cat messing with a bunch of weird plants. the cat sees that she woke up and introduces himself as littlecloud. he asks what her name is. “dove… dove…?? i dont know” says dovekit.
he asks her how she got there, and if she has any family. she does not remember. so littlecloud tells her she’s gonna have to stay here for the time being. he asks her if anything hurts, and dovekit says she thinks may have hit her head.
he gives her some of the weird plants and she goes back to sleep. when she wakes up her head has stopped hurting and she feels a lot better. she gets up to go walk around and is immediately introduced to the tawnyspawn.
tigerpaw is stupid and friendly (and hellbent on being her future best friend). dawnpaw is obnoxious and a bit (read: extremely) condescending but interested. flamepaw is nice and also the only one with half a braincell.
they take her around and introduce her to the rest of the clan. she sees blackstar and is like. “im pretty sure thats my dad” tigerpaw gasps. flamepaw and dawnpaw are like. “What.” “he saved me from the fox im pretty sure thats my dad,” says dovekit
they go harass blackstar. dovekit follows him around like a puppy and the tawnspawn follow her. he has this train of literal 2 yr olds trailing after him and is wildly unhappy about this development. russetfur is also definitely siccing the kids on him to make him mad.
dawnpaw gives dovekit a passionate speech about the clans, but mostly how evil riverclan kicked completely innocent shadowclan out of their home, and how shadowclan has to set everything right and deliver justice to those cringe fail fishheads, or something.
a few days later the tawnyspawn are off doing their own thing and dovekit goes to see whats going on. dawnpaw tries to shut tigerpaw up but he spills the beans anyways. “we’re going to attack riverclan on a Secret Mission so that we can win back shadowclan’s honor and become WARRIORS so you cant tell anybody”
dawnpaw sighs. “dovekit this is for Big Kids Only, so you cant be here.” flamepaw is trying to talk tigerpaw out of doing this in the bg but tigerpaw is being stubborn. dovekit is sad about it but goes back to sulk in camp (and to harass her new dad).
a few hours later tawnypelt runs over to blackstar and is like. “blackstar my children are missing nobody knows where they went”
"oh!! they went to go attack riverclan to get back shadowclan’s territory!” informs dovekit helpfully.
“what.” says blackstar, tawnypelt, and russetfur in unison. the sky immediately opens up and starts Pouring. tawnypelt freaks out. dovekit is like “why cant we just follow the sound of their voices??” but everyone ignores her bc they think shes just being stupid.
“Fine!! ill just go find them on my OWN” says dovekit, following them by the sound of their voices (theyre proally arguing over something stupid).
now four of shadowclan’s children are missing. “you brought that kid here so you get to deal with her,” says russetfur. blackstar sighs dramatically and goes off to find his new child.
dovekit runs into an old man cat. “whatre you doin here??” says old man cat. “im looking for my friends!! whats your name :0? im dovekit!!” “my names purdy!”
blackstar shows up and is like. who tf are you. “this is my new friend purdy!!!” says dovekit. blackstar doesnt even know how to respond. “look we’re going to go back to the camp right now and we’re not taking this dude with us.”
dovekit is like “??? no??? we have to get my friends theyre right over there??” she says pointing in their direction w/ her tail. blackstar is ready to cry. so blackstar and purdy follow dovekit as she leads them closer to riverclan territory where they hear the tawnyspawn screeching like banshees.
they run over and find several cats w/ the tawnyspawn who are pinned down. “if you breathe in my direction ill kill all three of these children,” says a snotty dude.
“who tf are you” says blackstar
“im darktail you insolent snot,” says darktail.
one of his cats grabs dovekit and blackstar snaps. he lunges at darktail while purdy beats up the dude who snatched dovekit. the tawnyspawn take advantage of the moment, escape, and dogpile the other cats. its a disaster.
darktail swears revenge on blackstar till his dying day or something. nobodys really paying attention to him at this point. he runs off w/ his crew. “alright then” says blackstar. this has been a really weird and long day for everyone. blackstar wants to leave purdy but all the children immediately start crying. they bring purdy home.
“holy crap!!! purdy!!!!!” says tawnypelt. “why are you here??” but then she sees her children. she and rowanclaw give them a very stern lecture about Not Running Off Without Telling Anyone (in which tawnypelt is a massive hypocrite but to be fair god told her to)
in the meanwhile, blackstar asks dovekit how tf she knew they were there. “i could hear them, Obviously. ???? cant u not???” blackstar just looks at her. dovekit realizes that probably not everyone shares this ability. blackstar shoos her off and calls a meeting w/ the senior warriors.
dovekit goes off to bother purdy for stories and play w/ the tawnyspawn. nothing particularly interesting happens. blackstar and russetfur call her over later and start assessing her abilities. its only slightly a disaster because shes wildly distracted 80% of the time and her powers are unwieldy bc shes a kit.
cue training. there is a lot of trial, error, and tears (on both sides) but it works out in the end (mostly).
time skip. its been a few months. dovekit becomes dovepaw and blackstar mentors her b/c of her powers. at this point shes gotten control of how to pick out numbers, locations, troops, etc. basically she is a living radar.
blackstar calls another meeting w/ the senior warriors and afterwards calls a clan meeting. “alright losers we’re going to take back our territory and kick riverclan’s butt”
they go over the clan w/ all the cats and begin the trek home. another time skip because that takes a while and nothing particularly interesting happens.
when they get back, the clan stays outside the border while blackstar has dovepaw do a sweep of the territory. she finds a patrol led by a black cat named reedwhisker. blackstar picks a patrol out and they go to ambush the riverclan patrol.
the shadowclan patrol takes reedwhisker + the patrol hostage, but lets one go to tell mistystar. mistystar takes a patrol and comes over. “if you dont give us back our territory i will kill your son” says blackstar. mistystar is like “bro. i dont even want your stupid crusty territory anyways. screw you.”
she takes her son and the rest of the patrol and leaves. another win for shadowclan, obviously. maybe they have a party idk. end of book.
fading echoes
cinderheart has not been doing well. she’s been doing really badly, actually. her best friend died and she blames herself. she’s still grieving and continually lashing out at everyone around her. poppyfrost and honeyfern attempted to be there for her but after the continual rebuffs they decided to just give her space.
unfortunately cinderheart. doesnt have any other friends in thunderclan, so the only person she can talk to is lionblaze. unfortunately theres only so much he can do from windclan, so mostly shes been just been going into a downward spiral.
ivypaw hasnt been doing great either. she feels extremely guilty because she thinks its her fault that dovekit ran away, and when dovekit is never found, it gets 50x worse.
but she also doesnt want to say anything about her involvement in fear of getting punished. as time goes on, she starts getting babied by the clan (almost like leopardstar when she was a kid) because her sister disappeared and she took it really hard.
and like on one hand, she likes the attention, but on the other hand its too much a lot of the time. she starts adopting this “stop babying me!1!1!!!”/kinda edgy persona. the clan takes it like shes grieving, and she’ll grow out of it, so they dont say too much.
so the book opens w/ ivypaw and fernpaw’s apprentice ceremony. brief context about how fern was recently found by the thunderclan border w/o parents and taken into the clan. fernsong is apprenticed to brightheart. ivypool is apprenticed to cinderheart.
firestar probably thinks that they might be able to bond/break through to each other because they recently lost a sister/adjacent sister. neither of them are particularly enthusiastic about it.
cinderheart isnt particularly invested in ivypaw’s training. ivypaw can tell and gets rightfully frustrated, bc brightheart and fernpaw are getting along great and making lots of progress, while ivypaw is falling behind becuase cinderheart is being a terrible mentor.
ivypaw starts fighting back (disobeying, talking back, etc.), partially because this is the only time she gets paid attention, and partially because shes just mad, which makes cinderheart mad, which then makes ivypaw fight back more. this causes cinderheart to become more and more distant. in short: ivypaw’s apprenticeship is a disaster.
at some point during training, theyre practicing climbing trees and cinderheart tells ivypaw to do something. to spite her, ivypaw does the opposite and ends up falling, dislocating her leg. cinderheart panics and cinderpelt emerges.
cinderpelt basically possesses cinderheart and relocates her arm. they go back to camp and take ivypaw to the medicine cat den, gives ivypaw some poppy seeds and ditches.
“wow um. wtf was that” says cinderheart. leafpool is like, “hahaha………… about that. you’re um… cinderpelt reincarnated.”
“what.” says cinderheart
“CINDERHEART IS CINDERPELT REINCARNATED???” screams foxleap at the top of his lungs in the middle of camp. whatever was left of cinderheart’s life shatters.
so now instead of ignoring her, the entire camp won’t leave her alone - except now they just treat her as they would cinderpelt. “hey cinderheart remember when [enter something that happened in the old forest here]??” “hey cinderheart can you fix my paw??” “hey cinderpelt-” “are you going to become a medicine cat then??”
to pour more salt into the wound, cinderheart now gets a free commentary on everything in her life!! (this definitely includes lionblaze) there used to be sort of a barrier between cinderheart/cinderpelt but since cinderpelt emerged/took control, it shattered.
so between cinderpelt complaining about all the terrible decisions she’s made and the entire clan pretending that she’s cinderpelt instead of a Completely Different Person, when hawkfrost shows up w/ an invite to fight club on the weekends cinderheart is more than happy to take him up.
sure hawkfrost is wildly annoying and clearly hates her guts for some reason (no matter how hard he pretends not to whenever tigerstar is around) but this is great for three reasons.
1) nobody in the dark forest has any idea she’s cinderpelt. 2) warrior training!! emphasizing she is a Warrior not a medicine cat. 3) time away from cinderpelt!! they arent the same soul so they cant read each other’s thoughts (unless theyre trying to communicate) and cant share dreams
so she might be purposely oblivious. whatever. she doesnt even know who hawkfrost is b/c anybody outside of riverclan immediately forgot about him because he really was not very effective at all. and its not like hes about to start spilling the beans until shes ready to be indoctrinated w/ dark forest propaganda.
meanwhile, tensions between shadowclan and thunderclan have been rapidly rising. again. prey is being stolen, scents are on other territories, patrols get into skirmishes often.
firestar is hurt because he was trying to get mistystar to lay off on the territory and blackstar is mad because they literally Just got back and thunderclan is ALREADY trying to reinstate old rivalries.
cinderheart really isnt paying attention to what’s going on cuz shes. more than a little wrapped up in her own problems. until it turns into a war.
this battle feels way more vicious than normal. cinderheart tries to recall how this whole thing started and realizes she has absolutely no idea what tf is going on???
throughout the fight she notices weird stuff happening. mousewhisker and redwillow nod to each other. ratscar + blossomfall swap glances. applefur pulls snowbird off thornclaw’s back. literally wtf thinks cinderheart
and then russetfur takes a stab at firestar. out of nowhere, thornclaw goes for her throat. cinderheart barely saves russetfur in the nick of time - the injuries are bad enough that she is forced to retire.
“screw literally everyone in thunderclan except u” blackstar says pointing @ cinderheart “and i hope the rest of you rot in the dark forest.” he rounds the rest of shadowclan up and then leaves.
“well that was weird” says cinderheart. she goes off to find ivypaw and realizes that shes. not responding. oh thats a lot of blood-
cinderpelt pops up again and works w/ cinderheart to patch up ivypaw until she’s stable. they bring her into the medicine den together and let leafpool look her over. she says that they made it in time and ivypaw will live. she leaves to go look after the other patients, leaving cinderheart with her apprentice
cinderheart realizes that this is her fault. had she actually paid attention to ivypaw and given her proper training, this wouldn’t have happened. she resolves to try a lot harder to be a good mentor for ivypaw’s sake.
cinderpelt approves and apologizes for being so intrusive on cinderheart’s life. she really doesnt want to be in here either - this was a decision the idiots in starclan forced on her. she was taking it out on cinderheart, which wasn’t fair for her.
cinderpelt promises to try to give cinderheart as much privacy as she can (while trying to figure out how to get out of her brain). cinderheart thanks her. there’s a brief bonding moment.
cinderpelt says that since ivypaw seems stable she’s going to go to sleep now, since she exhausted herself earlier.
just as cinderpelt goes out to the back of cinderheart’s mind, blossomfall comes storming in about how cinderheart messed the plan up and how cinderheart screwed everything up for everyone & she’s a traitor to the cause, Honestly cinderheart you’re so useless-
“literally wtf are you talking about” says cinderheart
“you saved russetfur,” blossomfall says. “if we take out the leaders and deputies, we can destabilize the clans enough that taking over will be a piece of cake. are you a dark forest trainee or not, cinderheart?”
end of book
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