#on meds I don't/can't/shouldn't finish

[allalrightagain]

as much as I bitch about health stuff on here (and just, like, in general) I sometimes forget that what I live through isn't necessarily a common amount of being sick/disabled

...right up until I fill out intake forms for a new doctor's office that very clearly expects the reason you're seeing them to be the only health condition you've ever had, and as a result of An Event.

"list any health conditions" followed by "fill in the accident date and whether you're covered by workers comp" buddy I wish my eyes were broken because my work fucked up. they just come this way.

[extinctlesspains]

Hii could you please write something were the reader and Robby use to date but then he got with Tory.At the competition the reader meets kwon but he rude and obnoxious.until one moment she sees him training with kreese.she could she kreese working him up leading to him hurting himself to be the best.she sees kreese leaving so she decides to slip in and help him with first aid.They don’t say anything to each while she is fixing his hands.But they definitely have some tension.The next day before competition she and the rest of her teammates are out waiting for Daniel and Johnny.when kwon comes up he ignores the others while he just gives a the reader a kiss on the lips then walks away.leaving everyone of them in shambles.

A/n: WHOAAA DRAMA (I bring all the drama-ma-ma-ma💃🏻)

𝑇ℎ𝑎𝑛𝑘 𝑦𝑜𝑢 𝑔𝑖𝑓𝑡: 𝐾𝑤𝑜𝑛 𝐽𝑎𝑒-𝑆𝑢𝑛𝑔

𝐵𝑦 𝑒𝑥𝑡𝑖𝑛𝑐𝑡𝑙𝑒𝑠𝑠𝑝𝑎𝑖𝑛𝑠

»»——⍟——««

»»——⍟——««

𝑃𝑎𝑖𝑟𝑖𝑛𝑔: 𝐾𝑤𝑜𝑛 𝐽𝑎𝑒-𝑆𝑢𝑛𝑔 𝑥 𝑓𝑒𝑚! 𝑅𝑒𝑎𝑑𝑒𝑟

𝐺𝑒𝑛𝑟𝑒:𝑓𝑙𝑢𝑓𝑓

𝑆𝑢𝑚𝑚𝑎𝑟𝑦: 𝐼𝑡 𝑤𝑎𝑠 𝑎𝑛 𝑎𝑐𝑡𝑖𝑜𝑛 𝑜𝑓 𝑘𝑖𝑛𝑑𝑛𝑒𝑠𝑠, 𝑏𝑢𝑡 𝑘𝑖𝑛𝑑𝑛𝑒𝑠𝑠 𝑐𝑎𝑛 𝑔𝑜 𝑎 𝑙𝑜𝑛𝑔 𝑤𝑎𝑦. 𝐼𝑡 𝑚��𝑘𝑒𝑠 𝑝𝑒𝑜𝑝𝑙𝑒 𝑑𝑜 𝑢𝑛𝑒𝑥𝑝𝑒𝑐𝑡𝑒𝑑 𝑡ℎ𝑖𝑛𝑔𝑠, 𝑖𝑛𝑐𝑙𝑢𝑑𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑐𝑜𝑛𝑓𝑒𝑠𝑠𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑜𝑛𝑒𝑠 𝑙𝑜𝑣𝑒.

𝑊𝑎𝑟𝑛𝑖𝑛𝑔𝑠: 𝑘𝑖𝑠𝑠𝑖𝑛𝑔, 𝑢𝑠𝑒 𝑜𝑓 𝑌/𝑛.

▼△▼△▼△▼△▼△▼△▼△▼△▼△▼△

"Get up!" Sensei Kreese yelled to Kwon, who was already on the floor and bleeding. "You can't be the best fighter here if you're weak." He spat.

You watched like a small child seeing their parents argue. Your legs moved without you knowing, running to your locker and getting the small first aid you kept in case of emergencies.

You rushed back to the training room and saw Kwon there with his injures. No Kreese in sight. You looked around before sneakily walking in and checking up on the poor boy. "Kwon?" You whispered. He immediately looked up from the floor, ready to fight. "Whoa whoa... It's okay. I don't want to fight." You threw your hands up and placed your med kit aside. His eyes drifted to the medical equipment and lowered his hands, looking away as if he was embarrassed.

"You shouldn't have to deal with this." You muttered while getting some rubbing alcohol, bandages, and gauze. He flinched at the cold touch of the alcohol pad touching his wound on his head. "It only makes me stronger."

Being as gentle as you can to his cuts, you replied. "No, it makes you scared to mess up, and messing up is part of learning.... " you finished the first cut and put a bandage on it. "That's what makes you stronger." You continued in a soft whisper. Kwon stayed quiet while taking in your advice. "Look up." You placed you hand under his chin and cleaned the cut on his lip with an alcohol wipe.

Kwon looked up into your eyes, taking in your soft and delicate features. His heart was pumping at a fast rate due to the distance between you two. "I can't just lose-"

"I didn't say lose, I said it's okay to mess up every now and then. Personally, I've always liked the guys who don't always try to be perfect." You lectured, moving on to wrap his hand. "Because no one is perfect." Your words were limited, but they had a strong impact on Kwon.

A smile appeared on your face once you were done tending to Kwon's injuries. "I think you're all set!" He blinked and nodded. No words left his mouth, for he was thinking about you. Once he looked up to talk to you, you were gone and instead Kreese was back. "Where the hell did you get those bandages?" The sensei grunted, staring at his student.

"Whatever, it doesn't matter. Get back up, we aren't done."

.・゜゜・.・゜゜・.・゜゜・.・゜゜・

You smiled at Kwon who was across the mat. His smile and wave made him lose focus and fluster. "You good?" Yoon hit his arm softly.

"Yeah just... Thinking about someone- I mean something." Kwon gulped nervously with his fists clenched to the side. He debated in his mind whether he should do what he wanted to do.

"Y/n why are you staring at Kwon?" Sam snapped you our of your trance. "What do you mean? We're all staring at Kwon." "You're staring at him as if he's your boyfriend." She said loudly and laughed. Everyone turned to look at you for the word boyfriend. Robby especially.

You two had dated before and in the beginning of this karate war but broke up when he started hooking up with Tory. You left on good terms and you're happy for them. But just because Robby had a girlfriend, doesn't mean he wanted you to have a boyfriend. He tended to be very selfish with you. If he couldn't have you, no one else could.

"Boyfriend?" Robby scoffed. "Y/n how could you date a prick like that?"

"I'm not dating him! Sam was just joking." You gesture to him. "Yeah guys Y/n's not dating Kwon..." She said. "Yet."

Turning to her with a stern look, everyone started to talk and have an opinion on the topic. "I'm just saying maybe that's a good thing if they dated!" "He's the enemy!!" Demetri and Kwon argued.

"Uh, hey Y/n?.." The arguing came to a halt when Kwon approached you with a nervous look. You gasped and smiled. "Kwon... Hey... Whats- what's wrong?" He looked at the other Miyagi dos who looked ready to fight him, then back at you.

"I wanted to say thank you for yesterday..." He started. Thinking he was done, you talked. "Oh no it's okay... It was the right thing to do." Your smile was the last push he needed. Without thinking, he cupped your face and quickly gave you a soft kiss. Your eyes widened at the delicate kiss.

He quickly ran off leaving you and everyone dumbfounded.

[cpunkwitch]

Hi I just paid some money towards my visa

I have 100 in the bank until my next paycheque in two weeks and that's it

And I'm no where near finished paying off my visa

Literally anything will help rn

My store is linked in my bio and pinned post, and one of my top posts is one of the many old support requests we made

Id love to sell something

I shouldn't be accepting donations as where I am it's technically illegal but I will seriously take whatever I can get so I can pay off my visa and have food, meds and other necessities

Please check out my store and share it wherever you can to bring attention to it

Examples for my art are spirits-art on tumblr and cassderolo on instagram

I don't wanna jinx it but there's a chance I'm gonna have to live on my own by next year or so if my parents end up moving provinces again and it's either that or move with them and lose everything and not have a job anymore or stay here and struggle to pay rent with my minimum wage job and keep my support system I built with my friends

I wanna be prepared incase either one happens and I can't do that with the way things are right now

[lint-beetle4]

Hello! May I request a fluff oneshot of F!Reader who’s part of the Monkie Kids helping patch Nezha up after his fight with the Brotherhood?

Sort of like a proper introduction between the two, since Nezha didn’t pay attention to her during the Samadhi Fire arc.

Nezha-lovers rise up, we finally have content

Medical Attention (Nezha x Reader Fluff)

"This is ridiculous." Flower-Boy grumbled. "I shouldn't need to be patched up like this. I can still fight!"

You scoffed, rolling your eyes as you patched up a rather nasty looking stab wound in his stomach. You were suprised at first to be face-to-face with a deity like Nezha, but the novelty quickly wore off when you saw how childish he really could be. He may be an adult, but the fires of prepubescence never left him mentally.

"What? What's that reaction for?"

"Just that you're being a big baby right now." You chuckled to yourself. "You got your ass handed to you, so now you just look like you're trying to ask for a second serving."

Nezha rolled his eyes, pouting slightly. "I was doing my job. Those friends of yours rudely took me away from my duty, and now the world as we know it is at stake!"

"My friends saved your life, actually." You finished wrapping up the last of Nezha's wounds, "You should be thanking them, or I don't know--introducing yourself first."

Nezha looked at you as if you had combusted into flames, confusion spread through his body. "Introduce myself? You surely know who I am, right?"

"Sure I do." You shrugged. "But, a simple hello is better than whining about your defeat, don't you think?"

Nezha scoffed. "Is a 'simple hello' going to save the world?"

"Is your bitching?"

Nezha froze, his shoulder rising and slumping with your verbal jab. With a sigh, Nezha shook his head, looking away briefly. "Well, I guess I didn't get your name before. You do look familiar."

Nezha turned back to you, extending a hand. "Might I ask your name then?

You introduced yourself, shaking Nezha's hand back. "You saw me when Mei caught on fire and nearly burnt the world down. Kind of a big moment, so I get not knowing who I am."

"Oh right," Nezha nodded, remembering the vivid stresses of dragon girl's containment of the Samadhi Fire. "I think remember seeing you there."

You laid back, watching as the rest of your group continued to tend to themselves, worry emitting from everyone as they figure out how to better the shit that got thrown at them.

"So, how long do you think wounds like yours would take to heal?"

"Me?" Nezha hummed, trying to relax his body with a barely hid hiss. "I guess...a few hours in heaven, might be some time down here though."

"Does it hurt at all?" You couldn't help but hover above the god, ensuring none of your work got damaged. The bandages you guys had were running thin enough. "Try not to move either, you'll get even more hurt."

"I'll be fine." Nezha rolled his eyes, wincing briefly. "The pain is manageable. You've done well; I need nothing else."

"Right, you liar." You huffed humorously. "I'll bring in some pain meds then."

"Some what?"

"Oh, you guys are missing out!" You laughed as you walked back to retrieve some pills from Sandy. You wondered if gods even dealt with large amounts of pain to need medication. Perhaps Nezha would educate you on the physiology of deities one day.

Nezha seemed to be calmer a few minutes after his greeting with the wonders of tylenol and a glass of water. His body was still tense, face pensive as he mulled over what you could only presume was the consequences of Azure's new reign. It wouldn't last long judging from the cracks in reality that have started to pop up.

"I'm sure you'll figure out something." You chimed in, jolting Nezha from the pit his throughts had been digging.

Nezha stared at you, mouth gaped slightly.

"You know," you continued, "a way to defeat Azure."

"It's..." Nezha looked away, glaring at the ground. "We can't do anything without Wukong admittingly. Without him, our chances are slim."

"So why not bring him back?"

"With what scroll?" Nezha snapped, his shoulder rising slightly. "We have nothing to go off of without a scoll. Even then, trying to find Wukong through centuries of life?"

"Would you believe me if I said we had a guy who knew over half of Wukong's life and another guy with a broken scroll that has Wukong's pretty name all over it?" You chuckled, shaking your head. "We don't have much to go off of, but MK's observant enough to know how much we need to kick off."

Nezha perked up, his eyes sparking with something you couldn't decipher. "You have his scroll?"

You nodded, gesturing over to MK holding the broken scroll piece in his hands. Poor kid seemed distraught, but hope wasn't fully lost.

"We have a chance then." Nezha gasped. "I need to talk with the boy."

"Give yourself like a 15 minute break, man." You stood up, making sure Nezha didn't move from his place. "All that sense of duty is what got you injured in the first place."

Nezha groaned. "We have the potential key to victory in our grasp, and you want us to have nap time?"

"Yep," You sat beside Nezha, stretching out and effectively pinning him as you laid on his lap, mindful of his injuries. "You ain't moving a bit, blossom."

Nezha sputtered, hands gesturing wildly before he sighed and crossed him arms. "Fine, 15 minutes, and then we can get started."

"Great!" You chirped, lifting yourself off of Nezha, watching as he sighed in his defeat, looking out into the nature that grew silent with the growing threat of Azure's gradual demise. 15 minutes wasn't enough to wipe away the fear that grew in your chest, but it was enough to let yourself remember the life you lived along the way, finding reasons to keep fighting, and most importantly, ensuring that your friends never lose the spark that grants you guys your impossible victories.

[nurse-floyd]

Not a People Doctor

Pairing: Rhett Abott x Vet!Reader

Fandom: Outer Range

After a bar fight, Rhett shows up at your doorstep.

For the amazing @vivwritesfics and the reason I am now Rhett/ Bob trash! Thank you for the title idea 💕💕

It's getting late as you settle down in your living room with a hot cup of tea and the latest book you're reading. Your peace is interrupted by a soft knocking at your door. You almost think you've imagined it when the knock comes again, a little louder this time. Grumbling slightly, you set your book aside, hoping it isn't another mare in labour or a horse with colic; you just want a quiet night.

Opening the door, you put on a smile for the paying customer you expect to find, but your smile falls as you see none other than Rhett Abbott, your childhood friend and a frequent customer. He looks dishevelled, blood staining his clothes, and you can already see the bruises and cuts on his face in the dim porch light.

"Jesus, Rhett, what the hell happened to you?" you exclaim, ushering him inside.

He winces as he moves, clearly in pain but not wanting to let on. "Got into a bit of a scuffle at the bar," he mutters, not quite meeting your gaze.

Leading him into your living room, you move the blanket you'd been cuddled under not long ago. "Sit down, let me take a look at you."

He lowers himself onto the sofa. You flip on the light switch to give you a better view of his injuries as you sit on the coffee table opposite him.

"You must've really pissed someone off," you tut as you gently turn his head with your fingers on his chin. You lift his shirt seeing the bruises over his ribs, shaking your head. "We need to get you to a hospital; some of these cuts need stitches. Probably got a broken rib or two as well." 

Rhett gives you a shit-eating smile, a smile only he could pull off when his face looks half as bad as it does, and it still makes you weak at the knees. "That's why I came here, thought you were a doctor."

"I'm an animal doctor, not a people doctor," you shake your head in disbelief.

"I can try. I don't have any of the good pain meds, so it's going to hurt like a bitch, and it won't be the prettiest. Gonna have a few more scars to add to the list."

"Never had any complaints from you. You always liked my scars and tattoos."

You smack him lightly on the arm, causing a 'hey' from him in response. Ignoring him, you run to get the first aid kit you keep in your bathroom closet as well as your veterinary kit.

You start to clean his wounds, carefully stitching up the deep cut over his eyebrow. You can't help feeling a pang of concern. Rhett isn't a stranger to bar fights, but seeing him so vulnerable and injured stirs something within you.

"Are you going to tell me what that fight was about?" you ask gently, your voice laced with worry.

Rhett hesitates for a moment before he meets your gaze. "It was dumb. Just some guy mouthing off about things he shouldn't have," he admits, jaw clenching.

You sigh, finishing up and snipping the last of the stitches. "You need to be more careful, Rhett. You're going to get yourself seriously hurt one day."

He nods, his expression sheepish. "I know... I know. I just... I didn't want to go to the hospital."

You place a comforting hand on his cheek, your thumb gently smoothing over his cheekbone. "Well, you're just lucky you've got me, and I happen to know my way around stubborn bull riders, and I'm pretty good at suturing."

A small smile tugs at the corner of his lips. "You have no idea."

Once you've finished cleaning and bandaging the last of the wounds on his face, you sit back, admiring your handiwork. "There... all done," you lean in and place a gentle kiss on the side of his head, "good as new." 

Rhett stands up slowly, getting a look in the mirror above your fireplace. "Thanks, sweetheart. I owe you one."

"Don't mention it, I'll just add it to the list. Just promise me you'll be more careful, Rhett. I'm pretty good, but some injuries I can't fix."

He nods, his gaze finally meeting yours. "I promise."

As he makes his way to the door, you can't help but shake the feeling of concern lingering. "Hey, Rhett? You need a place to stay tonight? Probably shouldn't be alone after something like this."

"I don't want to put you out..."

"You're not," you interrupt him.

Rhett's gaze softens, and you can see the gratitude in his eyes. "I... I'd appreciate that. Thank you."

You feel a wave of relief wash over you as you leave him on the couch, running to change your sheets, not wanting him to spend the night on the sofa with his injuries.

"Beds all changed; let's get you some rest. I've got some pain meds and a glass of water up there for you too."

He looks at you, confused as to why you haven’t brought down blankets and pillows, assuming he'd be sleeping on the couch.

You hold out your hand. "Come on, I don't mind. Besides, I'll feel a lot better knowing you're not sleeping on that uncomfortable sofa."

He blinks, confusion evident in his expression. "Are you sure, Y/N? I don't want to intrude."

You give him a look that leaves no room for arguments, and he knows he'd be fighting a losing battle to even try.

With a grateful nod, he takes your hand, helping pull himself to his feet before he follows you up the stairs. You pull back the covers, helping him slip under the blankets before joining him. As you both lie there, you couldn’t help but love the feeling of the warmth of his body beside you. You love it even more as he wraps an arm around your waist, whispering a thank you into the crook of your neck. 

[emo-trash101]

Guys I think I've developed an addiction to writing this series, but uhm, here's part 3 guys

Home is Where the Heart is

Pt 3

Daisuke x Male! Reader

Pronouns: Second person, implied male

Word count: 1k+

TW: People going insane, Jimmy, murder/death, general mouthwashing stuff, internalized homophobia (this is just generally for the whole series)

Day 54

It's been weeks since Daisuke had really talked to you.

You know it shouldn't be affecting you as much as it is. You hate him, and his stupid bright attitude. But right now, every single time you look at him and he offers a weak smile instead of his usual bright one, or him having just dry conversation instead of talking your ear off about some random thing you weren't paying attention to, well its making you feel sad?

It's almost as if you feel bad for treating him so terribly, and not giving him the time of day. Surely he wasn't being so kind to try and piss you off, so why did you hate him so bad?

These were all questions that had been racing through your head for at least the last week. And it's not like you've had jobs that require quieting the voices in your head. Ever since you spilled that dumb bottle of disinfectant, Anya has been having you just taking inventory, over and over again, almost passive aggressively.

So now, here you are, counting each individual pill from a pill bottle by yourself in the med room. It would at least be a little better if Daisuke was in here annoying you like he used to when he'd have his break.

And speaking of the devil, right as you finish counting the pills in the bottle and writing it down, Daisuke walks through the door, "Hey Anya-?" He starts, before seeing it was just you there. His voice immediately sounds more dejected, "Oh uhm, hey (Name)" he says.

You turn around swiftly, being sure to not knock over the pill bottle "Oh, hey Daisuke, are you okay" you ask without even thinking. Why are you asking? You don't care about him and whether or not he's okay.

"Oh I just burnt my hand, it's really not a big deal." He says, rubbing the back of his neck with what you assume is the not burnt hand. You look at him, trying to will away the urge to rush up to him and check. Why are you acting like this?

"Lemme see." You say, motioning for him to come towards you so you can examine his hand. His eyes widen slightly in shock, but he quickly shakes it off, walking towards you. He offers his hand to you, and you grab it, carefully examining the burn as he starts explaining the story behind this injury, the same dorky smile on his face.

You let go of his hand, grabbing a small container of burn cream, applying some to your fingers before softly rubbing it over the burn area "You need to be more careful Daisuke" you say, looking up at him. Suddenly you both make eye contact. "Yeah, you're right" he says sheepishly, his eyes looking into yours. 'why is this happening?' you ask yourself, trying to will yourself to look away but you just can't.

Suddenly the door opens, Anya walking back in. Daisuke pulls away, some of the cream smearing up his fingers. "Oh hi Anya!" He says cheerfully walking towards the door., "I was just leaving" he says, and he whispers something to her something that you couldn't hear whatsoever.

Almost immediately after, Daisuke leaves the room, the silence afterwards deafening. "So what did I miss?" Anya asks, looking at you. Her speaking was what knocked you out of your trance, seeing you still had your hand somewhat outreach and still had a little bit of the burn cream on your fingers. "I...I don't even know" you say breathlessly.

And you wish that you could say that after he left things made a little more sense, but if you're being completely honest, you just feel more confused. You can't get the look of of his brown eyes out of your head.

At this point, you're considering requesting a psych eval just to make sure you aren't losing your mind.

Day 62

"I don't think you're suffering from psychosis." Says Anya carefully. You furrow your brows, looking at her intently "But, I swear something's wrong with me." A tense look on rests on your face. Ever since that one time you were around Daisuke about a week ago, you could swear you were going insane.

You had never ever had thoughts like these before, at least not as far as you could remember. Every time you close your eyes, or dream, or have even a minute of peace to yourself, all you can think of is Daisuke's brown eyes. And there's no reason behind it at all.

That, and the issues you had back when you hated him seem to have come back tenfold. Almost every time you catch him glancing at you, your face heads up almost immediately. If you didn't know better you'd assume that he's just somehow telekinetically giving you a fever.

"You didn't tell me what this was about" Anya said, a calm sad look on her face. "It's...its about Daisuke", you say pausing to take a deep breath. You had already told her about what happened the week prior, but this, this was a new development.

"It's like, every time I see him everything in my body speeds up and slows down at the same time and I feel like I'm burning alive" you say, leaning against the chair you're sitting on exasperatedly.

Anya smiles, something that seems to have become rarer these days "I think you have a crush (name)" she says, and a strange feeling fills your gut. Memories seem to flood your brain from growing up, your father scoffing at two men holding hands and leaning down close to you, telling you that a 'real man' would never be caught doing that disgusting of an act.

"No, no I definitely don't have a crush on him..." You say, scoffing at such an absurd idea "I don't think I could ever participate in such a terrible act" She looks back at you, a concerned and confused look in her face. "A-are you sure?" She asks, her brows furrowing.

Anger rushes through your veins at an unreasonably fast pace. "I'm not fucking gay." You say, your words dripping with venom. Before she can even respond, you stand up storming out of the medical room.

You don't even know what your plan was after you left. Where could you even go that she couldn't find you. You sigh angrily, making a turn towards the bedrooms when you bump into someone. You step back in surprise, looking up. "Shit I'm-" you stop what you're saying when you see it's Jimmy.

You and him haven't seem to have been getting along whatsoever. It's like, you always bump into him at the wrong times. "Watch where you're going, dumbass" he says, mumbling the last part as he shoulder checks you.

Before you really know it, you're in your room, hot angry tears running down your face. You don't know why you're so mad that Anya thought you had a crush on him. You know you're not gay, right? That's all that matters.

You repeat that to yourself as you start pacing your room, your hands clenched into fists. "There has to be...there has to be a good reason.." you say, trying to close your eyes to try and think.

But much to your dismay, the first thing you think of is his eyes, they way they looked into yours with such care. You open your eyes up again, more anger in you than you think you have ever experienced. You shout, not even words just a yell as you kick the nearest thing to you, which just so happens to have been your door.

You hear a loud crack, almost like the sound when wood snaps, and look down, seeing the entire bottom of your door being almost completely removed.

"Shit..." You say to yourself.

You really need to figure out what's going on before you destroy the rest of the stuff in your room.

It's so much more fun writing when I'm not like extremely sleep deprived, but in all this one is one of my favorites so far. I don't know how many parts this is gonna have but it's probably gonna be 6+

Anyways, make sure you drink water and eat food!

Last and Next

[junespriince]

Little Chickadee meet little Sparkle au

Bruce: you shouldn't carrying him like he's a stuffed toy, bud.

Dick, walking past Bruce: and you should've finished med school and not disappointed Alfred, B.

Bruce, punch to the gut:

Wally, giggling: he he loser-man, loser-man!!

Dick, smiling at Wally: he learns so fast!

Bruce, ANOTHER punch in the gut:

In justice league headquarters

Bruce, sobbing: you're son called me LOSER-MAN!!

Barry, sassy: well, he never tells lies, so.

Hal: it's so weird seeing him cry like that...

Clark, who seen Bruce cry: not really.

Diana, who made Bruce cry once: I think it's adorable.

Oliver: he's a child, get over it. Roy said worse to me than whatever those kids said.

Bruce: fuck off, you take them then if you think you have tough skin then.

Oliver: fine.

At Oliver's place

Oliver: Dick, sweetheart, you gotta let Wally walk on his own.

Dick: do you have your wife's permission to be telling me what I should and shouldn't do.

Oliver, gut punched: I don't need Dinah's permission for anything!

Wally: simp! Hehe, simp!!

Oliver, gut punched again:

Back at justice league headquarters

Oliver, in Dinah's: take back those demons, I never want to see them again!

Bruce: tough skin, huh?

Oliver: shut up!

Dinah: shhh, it's okay dear, they can't hurt you now.

[maddrumsticks2]

Just finished Skyward Sword! And I finished A Link Between Worlds a few days ago.

So, double post time! I'll start with ALBW because I had a few days to sit on that one.

Also just realized that with the completion of Skyward Sword, I have officially played and completed every 3D Zelda game! YIPPEEE!

(Long post below the cut!! Along with major spoilers for both aforementioned games!)

Ravio is SO SILLY. Though, he's already talked about a lot. Anything I could say about him has probably already been said.

But hey, I can't help but really like this silly guy who stole my house and all my rupees, okay? He's a little rascal.

So instead, I love Hilda having a clear motivation behind her actions. She is just trying to restore her kingdom. She wants her people to thrive. But she turned to the triforce instead of trying to find better meds to maybe help her people. Though the place was literally breaking apart, so maybe there really wasn't anything else that would've worked.

The story of this game is really heavy in the last 30 minutes, and that's really it. Before that it's just dungeons. Oh, and helping Ravio retire. I absolutely LOVED that XD

So, the distribution of the story could've been done better. But really, this game is so underrated for a Zelda game. Also, the whole moving through walls thing is super fun. LOVED that mechanic. Altogether, great game.

Okay, on to Skyward Sword!

SO good. This game does NOT deserve all of the negativity the surrounded it for some reason. Sure, I used button controls (I couldn't figure out motion controls for the life of me pff) but STILL! I think the Switch version definitely made it easier on me. Though idk what the Wii version is like so I shouldn't be trying to compare them lol.

On to non-gameplay stuff, the dungeons were so cleverly designed. As someone who is not particularly smart, I never found myself super stuck in the dungeons. Instead, I had a lot of fun with them! That's always a plus with me, but I don't find too much shame in looking up a walkthrough here or there.

Story! So fun! I loved Groose's character arc especially. I totally despised him at first but he reached silly status pretty quickly. His character was handled really well, too. He didn't just flip personalities. He showed his flip through his actions, not his words. Which for Groose is a perfect choice.

Also, Ghirahim is SUCH a theatre kid. Nothing can change my mind on that. (And before anyone gets mad, I'M a theatre kid. I know what we act like.)

I find it interesting that the whole game only takes place in three regions that you visit over and over again. Other Zelda games have done this before, but I think Skyward Sword does it the most. I loved all the regions, but tbh I think the forest was the most boring to me. The Ancient Cistern was cool though. I won't deny that. Also, Eldin was probably the most traumatizing for Sky. SO many bad things happened there lol. Like being burned because of how hot it is, then finding chains Zelda has definitely been bound in, being told he was too late. Then he comes back later and not much traumatizing stuff that time. Maybe getting chased by lava, probably not lasting trauma, just scary for a minute lol. But when he comes back a final time, the volcano erupts, covering the sky in ash and leaving him with no return to the sky. To make matters worse, he gets beaten up and captured by monsters and all his stuff was stolen. Wow I just wrote a lot about Eldin pfff

Sadly, I already knew about the whole Zelda is Hylia thing. I kinda wish I hadn't known that. That cutscene probably would've been cooler if I played this game in the complete dark.

Also, Link is so subtly expressive in this game. He actually has facial expressions! I love how at the end of the game, you can SEE Link's determination. You can see his desire to cut Demise down and save his world. I LOVE his expressiveness!

One thing I didn't know was that Demise was the Imprisoned. That actually surprised me.

Then there's Impa. I already figured out that the Old Lady was Impa before the reveal. So that was just "I called it." But here's the silly part about that cutscene: I read fanfic saying she died once. But of course I let my guard down. I believed that the author had Impa die from Ghirahim hitting her. And so, literally one text box away from the scene, I sent my sister in law a text like "lol, idk why I thought Impa dies. She's literally been here the whole time."

I had to send a text probably two seconds late saying "nvm, she died."

Whoopsies, silly me XD

Last thing I wanna say! (I think.) The whole lightning in the end battle is SICK! And now all the lighting scars people give Sky make sense. That's probably one of my favorite scar headcanons, honestly. That and Wild's blast scar. Also love giving Twilight a nasty arm scar, but I'm getting off track.

So yeah! Those are my silly disjointed thoughts on both the games I finished recently! Now I only have 2D games left to play. My list became so much smaller! It went from having ten games to just five.

Just have the Oracles games, Link's Awakening, the original and Adventure of Link to play! (I'm debating which one to start with. Probably the Oracles games to I can get Legend's character down better.)

Yay! Wall of text!

[riality-check]

👉👈 could i request another lil ficlet that includes steve getting comfortable with his body as it changes over time, that shit is so healing

Hi anon, of course you can!! I love getting requests, even though I might take a bit to answer them!!

I'm going to take this one in a slightly different direction, if that's alright with you. I've got a couple of thoughts about Steve and migraines that I'm using this opportunity to share.

(For those who missed it, this ficlet is the one anon is referring to!)

Steve thought, like most people, that his twenties would be filled with adventure. He'd get to party, make mistakes, learn about himself, and have fun. He'd go places and find a place to call home and maybe even a person, too.

But he's twenty years old, and at least once every two weeks, he's out of commission because his brain decides to scream at him.

Scream is probably too kind of a word. Jackhammer through his eye socket fits better, but that takes too much effort to say.

Today is one of the jackhammer days, and Steve doesn't even get all the fun warning signs and the aura before it sets in because he wakes up to pain so bad that opening his eyes feels monumental.

Woo-hoo, twenties!

He rolls over to smash his face into his pillow. It blocks out the light, and the pressure helps, but being face-down is going to make him nauseous in a few minutes.

What he'd give to be normal.

A hand snakes its way into his hair, lightly ruffling it, and while, normally, Steve considers himself exceptionally lucky and ahead of the curve (for once) for already having found his person to call home, right now he wishes he were alone.

Not really. The hand in his hair has to go, though. It's too much when breathing hurts.

He groans and tries to move out of the way, but that hurts, too.

"Oh, shit," Eddie whispers, taking his hand away. "Migraine day?"

Steve hums, though it ends up being more of a whimper.

"Okay," Eddie says.

The bed shifts next to Steve, and the sound of footsteps appears and disappears. Before Steve musters the courage or willpower to turn back over and open his eyes, the bed dips again, and gentle hands are rolling him over.

He groans in anticipation of the light, but it doesn't hit his eyes. Eddie must have closed the curtains.

"Water is on the nightstand, along with your meds. I don't know how much they'll help now, but if you can stomach them, I think you should take them," Eddie says softly. "Do you want the ice pack?"

Steve nods, just barely.

Gently, Eddie places the ice pack, already wrapped in a towel, on his forehead. Steve sighs when the cold makes contact with his skin.

"Sorry," he rasps. He's glad Eddie brought him water, even if he can't make himself grab it yet. His voice is a wreck.

"What for?" Eddie asks, lightly running a hand up and down Steve's bare arm.

"Making you do this."

Eddie huffs. Steve cracks his eyes open to see him frowning, like he expected.

"You don't make me do anything," Eddie says. "Do I make you do anything on the days my nerve pain flares?"

"No," Steve mumbles.

It's just not fair. The monsters are dead and gone. Steve is young and strong and hot and able, except for the days when he isn't. He shouldn't have days when he isn't, not when the shit that caused them is dead.

He wishes this was something like the Mind Flayer. Something that could be exorcised from him or cut out like a tumor. Something that can be killed.

Steve is good at killing things. He isn't good at fighting by standing down.

"So, we have a day in," Eddie says, still quiet. "I wanted to finish my book, anyway. Mind if I read next to you?"

"Sounds good," Steve says.

He closes his eyes again, hears the rustling of sheets as Eddie gets settled in next to him.

It does sound good. Eddie has a way of spinning things, of distracting them both from both of their pain.

Steve wishes he could see himself in Eddie's eyes. He wonders what he'd look like. He wonders about the thoughts that Eddie doesn't share.

He's long grown past the misguided belief that those thoughts are bad.

Steve isn't good at fighting by standing down. But he thinks, as the light sound of Eddie's steady breathing and the blissful dark and the pleasant cold of the ice pack start to lull him back to sleep, despite the pain, that he doesn't have to fight. That this is just a condition of existence, just something to be lived with.

Not an enemy. Just baggage. And Steve can use his arms to hold it instead of swing.

He isn't normal. Neither is Eddie. And that's okay, too.

[rishiguro]

09; APOLOGIES

your drinks have been finished and paid for when iwaizumi took a hold of your hand and the two of you started to wander across the park. neither of you said a word, distinct chatter and the sounds of gravel being squashed underneath your shoes filling your ears.

turning your head you looked at your date. while he seemed relaxed, you could see his unoccupied hand fidgeting and flexing at this side.

after a few more minutes of silence, you decided to speak up. "what's on your mind? you seem kind of absent"

his head immediately whipped towards you. "oh, sorry." he apologized, shaking his head slightly with a smile on his lips, “i didn't mean to"

immediately after he fell silent again, his brows furrowed. you could basically see the gears turning in his head. "is something bothering you?" you tried again, nudging his shoulder.

the two of you stopped shortly before iwaizumi dragged you to a nearby park bench. "kind of?" the man said, letting go of your hand. balling his hands into fists, he shoved them into his pockets.

¡waizumi's face was still turned away from you, staring at the ground. “i’m trying find a way to apologize without sounding like a total dick head"

you tilted your head. "why would you have to apologize? did you kill someone?" you asked with a goofy smile on your lips, trying to lighten the heavy atmosphere.

he immediately let out a breathy laugh. "i don't think an apology would suffice after murdering someone, so no"

"then how bad can it be? did you break any of the geneva conventions?" you tried again, raising an eyebrow at him.

you were sure that he had no reason to be so worried. what's the worst thing he could've done after all? probably he just worried over nothing.

hopefully.

that was when iwaizumi started laughing out loud, hunching over as he shook his head at you. "gee, what kind of person do you think i am?"

you shrugged. "you're the one who suggested that you're a serial killer, so obviously i'°d go with it"

"and yet you're still going out with me, huh?" he grinned, quickly shooting you a glance. "you must love the thrill"

or was he planning to stop whatever the two of you had going on? but then why would he drag this out so long? you were sure that he was someone quite pragmatic, preferring to get to the point directly.

"what can i say, i always loved the hot villains" you shot back, punching his arm lightly.

"that might get you killed one day" iwaizumi replied slyly, turning back to face you.

e'm fine with that"

silence fell over the two of you again. you leaned back, closing your eyes as you felt the last sunbeams of the day being soaked up by your skin.you shoved your hands into the pockets of iwaizumi's jacket.

after some more minutes if comfortable silence, the dark haired man took a deep breath before speaking again. "listen, i'm sorry for cancelling our plans so often lately." he began. you turned your head to look at him, noticing how he still refused to face you. his lips were pressed into a tight line when he stopped. he laughed embarrassed. “i know it fucking sucks"

you hummed in response, waiting for him to continue.

"don't know, it's-" he sighed, shaking his head at himself, before cursing under his breath. "fuck it" iwaizumi say up straight, finally allowing himself to face you, while his leg was bouncing impatiently. "you know, i have problems with my pancreas. it's chronic. i can't really do anything against it besides taking my meds and taking care of myself" he explained slowly, an almost sad smile on his lips. he shook his head, hand going through his spiked up hair. "and while i know that this shouldn't affect you and i shouldn't burden you with it, i feel like you should know"

you nodded slowly, understanding. "lately my episodes are more frequent and yeah" he continued, shrugging. "sorry, i shouldn't ramble, it's not really something pleasant"

after a couple of moments you looked down. "well, it certainly makes sense now"

looking back at him, you gave him a reassuring smile. thank you for telling me and trusting me, iwa. it means a lot"

in a weird sense it was comforting. comforting to know that there was somebody else in your circle, somebody you liked and talked to so often, that understands your struggles. someone that isn't perfectly healthy and someone that might feel as betrayed by their body as you did some days. someone to confide in, in a way.

you wanted to punch yourself for thinking that way. you were way over that pity parade, or at least you should be. you thought you had made your peace with the situation, after all it's not like you could change it. and most days you did. so why were you feeling almost relieved?

"you're not- i don't know, mad or anything?" iwaizumi looked surprised.

"no. i get it. i wouldn't want to be around anybody on a bad day either" you replied. "especially when they're terrible enough that you can blow up at anybody just for breathing or sighing in your direction'

might as well tell him, right? you were confident that you had this mutual understanding and trust in each other. it would only be fair.

and frankly, you wanted him to know. as simple as that.

“i have some chronic health problems myself, you know" you looked away from him. now it was you that stared at the ground. "my body decided to fuck up my lungs though, not my pancreas" iwaizumi chuckled. "we're both fucked, huh?"

you looked back at him, a playful grin on your lips.

"match made in heaven"

"so, i take that as you accept my apology?"

you laughed. “yes, you dickhead”

evanescent

/ɛvəˈnɛs(ə)nt,iːvəˈnɛs(ə)nt/ — “soon passing out of sight, memory, or existence; quickly fading or disappearing.”

mlist | previous | next

taglist: @ninjamomo @not-another-ackerman @midnight-drives-with-sunarin @bloombb @jewlmin

[ask-the-totally-real-peppino]

(I have been trying to write this post for a while, but it keeps coming out like a sob story, and it is really not that deep jkfdgkj

So I am just going to say it, bc you guys know I love to ramble for ages, and I need some opinions

1 year of this blog is tomorrow (or today depending on how long I take to write this kjldfg), and I really do appreciate you all being here - if you have been here since the beginning, or just followed recently - if you've sent an ask, liked, reblogged, shared with a friend, theorised, made fanart, or followed me to my art blog and watched me make (and continue to make) a billion clones, anything; thank you

I made this blog on a whim, only like a week after getting into Pizza Tower, and I had no idea it would turn into what it is now

Of course, in the beginning there were a lot of actual posts, like with backgrounds and multiple characters, and I'd post several times a day if I could - and while I was having fun, it was not ideal - I'd frequently post at 7am after spending all night working on a post then I'd pass out, I'd forgo eating or showering just to draw, and I had wrecked my wrist several times, and continue to push pass the pain just to post

It wasn't just hyperfixation, it was obsession - much easier to realise that in retrospect

I was also medicated at the time, I had been on antidepressants for 3 years, so around April (I think) I ran out of meds and was unable to get more due too third party issues/unable to get in contact with my doctor/etc (and unbeknownst to me at the time, the last two packs I had were expired) - so I am sure you can imagine the sort of affect suddenly going cold turkey on the med that make you not wanna die has on a person - I was not doing great to put it lightly

But I still wanted to continue - so many people had praised me on the frequency of posts, and how excited they were and all this validation - I couldn't let people down! (Also I was, and still am, a disabled shut-in loser with no friends, posting is like the only social interaction I had/have kdfgkgfd)

But I think I did - I intimidated myself out of drawing main posts with how much work they were, started the intermission even though I said I shouldn't, had no script or direction and that I was not 100% invested in to try to motivate myself back into main posts, and it was just easier to draw silly ooc posts than do the thing I really wanted to do instead

Of course, this is not any of you guys' fault - I have always had this issue of starting something, it getting way bigger than I can manage, crashing and then just unable to get going again - I have so many unfinished comics, half-done projects and abandoned askblogs it's not even funny - but it's also like, not the end of the world, if I don't finish things I start for fun - sure, I'll feel guilty as hell for a while, but life moves on

So that being said, I would still very much like to continue the story here - I have been working on some stuff in the background (I even updated Pep's reference in the last few days, with a ton of new stuff), but I still don't think it's gonna be soon - I am doing somewhat better than I was, and I actually have an appointment for with my doctor finally (I will probably have to do some reassessments since they can't just put me back on the meds, after not having them for almost a year, and then I'd have to probably get reaccustomed to side effects etc), so despite it all I am still here

I am not sure if I want to continue the intermission with Bean and Fiend at this time - I know a few folks enjoyed it (mostly bc Fiend kjsdfkj) - but as mentioned previously it was unplanned, unscripted, and I was quickly not feeling it, as I am sure some of you guys were too - the intention was for Fiend to give you guys another hint to the main story, but getting to that point was not fun - I might do a poll on this in a separate post

I also mentioned a while back that I would be cutting down the Big Post into smaller posts, and posting as and when parts were done - but once again, do not expect these soon - (although there is a very late Valentines post coming hopefully soon)

And I think that should hopefully be it for now - I know this is a huge post, and probably still a bit sob story-ish, but oh well - I also know that the hype for Pizza Tower had unfortunately died down significantly, but I'm still working on PT stuff on my art blog @smalltimidbean if you wanna see more silly things (and maybe some lore for here hehe)

It is also the first now, so happy birthday Pep

Okay, thank you, and see you later)

[ladyravenjadethe2nd]

The choices made in the trick tower were ass.

Sorry Togashi, but the bet thing made no sense.

So the chick should have been like Yo let's bet on this dude being dead and Leorio should have been like No? That's fucking stupid. Kurapika get your ass up and go see if he's dead or not.

Like Kurapika doesn't want to kill the guy fine, but why would he refuse to check him?

I guess we could say he is worried he will be overcome with rage and kill the dude if he looks at him up close? But while Leorio would be a dick about that it feels like something Gon would handle by pointing out that he was able to stop himself from killing the dude already. Something something weirdly wise comforting thing that Gon does that makes Kurapika see things differently because Gon does that a lot for him.

So yeah logically in character Kurapika should go see if the dude is dead and when he finds out he isn't Leorio should be 'Punch him in the dick!'

And Kurapika would believe Leorio that dude is faking cause Leorio already proved his med skills, but Kurapika wouldn't punch him in the dick he would probably just threaten the guy. Say that faking is dishonorable and that if he is lying Kurapika will make him long for death or something like that.

And dude is a coward so he isn't gonna stand up to that.

Point to the team.

But like even if that didn't happen and they start betting as soon as the girl changed her bet and tried to pull that I bet he is faking thing Leorio should have been like Ha! Made you admit it loser! Bet is OFF! Kurapika get your ass over here and finish the fight!

Like they said Kurapika's fight is unfinished so there is no reason he can't enter at anytime and finish it. He would also hate being tricked like that.

Moving on to Leorio the future dr who will be seeing thousands of people being naked in a professional setting risking a bet to touch a criminal's pussy. Can money hungry Leorio really not keep his eye on the prize?

Like don't get me wrong I think it would be hard for him, but his inner thoughts should be something like.

'Come on man! You can get hundreds of bitches when your a hunter! Ones that haven't been rotting in prison! How often do they bath here? What did she even do? What if she was like a black widow or something? This has got to be a trap right?'

It's also just a risky bet. Like one person picks what they bet on and the other person sets how much right? If Leorio had his head in the game and said 'All 80 hours on you being a girl!' That would be it. Like she just would have lost and really fast.

She was risking a lot on him having no self control, not caring about being seen as cool by his friends, not having a partner he was loyal too. Like come on that was a dumb thing to bet on that shouldn't have worked.

I get that Togashi wanted everyone to fight, but they could have just said if they chose to fight everyone they will be shown a faster path.

If he wanted people to lose he shouldn't have made it so easy for them to win.

[futchmemes]

whining and rambling about my self sabotage don't mind me

i've been at home for months now and i'm supposed to be like buckling down on getting a job now that my internship is finished but for some reason i'm just fucking paralyzed. like i don't know what's wrong with me, i had to do the exact same thing last fall and i applied for over 30 jobs in less than 2 months. i'm so fucking embarrassed and i keep lying that i've been working on it this whole time but i haven't done shit. like genuinely i don't know why it's so much worse this time and i feel awful all the time and i don't know what to do about it

that's a fucking lie i know exactly what to do about it, i need to go outside more and get literally any exercise and fucking APPLY FOR JOBS so i can stop feeling so fucking bad about myself but i'm just.... not. like i'm just sitting here day after day pretending to work at my laptop and i'm not. i suspect this is a "when the disability is disabling" moment but it hasn't been this bad since before i got medicated more than 5 years ago and i don't fucking understand why it's happening so suddenly???

i have an appointment with my psych in december just for maintenance reasons but idk what to even say to her about this or if i should say anything. like idk if this is me needing to up my ssri or try a different adhd med or what, and the idea of fucking with my meds is exhausting just to think about and might make things worse so like why even bother? i have an appointment with a sleep specialist a couple weeks before that and i've been having sleep issues for so long i have to hope i can finally figure that out and that'll do something, but i can't wait for fucking december, i need to do something Now

i probably just have to force myself to have any fucking discipline whatsoever and once i start it'll be fine, but getting over the block feels so stupidly difficult. it shouldn't feel so difficult! it shouldn't be! i already have a resume i just need to do my portfolio, i've literally written a fuckign masters dissertation why is this so bad! AND my mom keeps being like "you should try to get a temporary retail job in the meantime" and like yeah maybe! but also the idea of doing that makes me want to fucking die!

someone needs to come threaten to beat me with a hammer i think that might be for the best. maybe actually beat me with a hammer. maybe then my family would feel sympathy for me instead of being frustrated and angry. bitch I'M frustrated and angry you don't need to do it for me!!!!!

god!!!!!!! someone come throw my brain in a hypersonic jewelry cleaner maybe that would fix it

[maddyb-rapps]

One

The Farmers Son

I’ve always felt alone but I was never truly alone. I’ve always had people responsible for me, I was a burden and I still am now. My foster parents went as soon as the world ended and after I was no longer their burden I became the burden to a group on the outskirts of Atlanta.

master list

Ivy

I sat in front of Lori as she brushed through my oily hair. “Maybe you should just cut it out.” I groan as my head jerks every time the brush pulls at the knot. I would ask Carol for the practically magic detangler spray she had for Sophia but it would feel wrong to ask because half our group was about to leave to look for the poor girl.

“Quit being dramatic I’m almost done.” She chuckles as she works through the knot. She carefully french braids my hair with gently fingers. “It’s not my fault your so tender headed.”

Once she finished I thank her as we both stand. “Are you sure it’s fine that I stay.” I can’t help but feel guilty because even Carl is going.

“No honey, don’t worry about it Dale needs help looking over everything and T-Dog that cuts pretty bad. Go ahead and rest up in the RV we’ve all had a long night. Dale will get you when we leave.”

I nod and give her a tight lip smile as I make my way to the back of the RV.

Not long after the group leaves Dale comes to tell me everyone had left. I really do appreciate the extra time he gave me. Pulling my shoes back on and grabbing my chunky sunglasses I step outside the RV into the Georgia heat.

The first thing I see is T-Dog clutching is arm. “Hey T, you feeling any better.”

“What do you fucking think.” The usual nice man snaps.

“Oh, well nice to see you too sunshine.”

“Ignore him Ivy, that’s just the fever talking. Say why don’t you go and look around for a few things for yourself. Hopefully you’ll run across some meds while you’re at it. Just don’t wonder to far.” Dale tries to give me a smile but his face is consumed with worry as he looks at T.

“Yes, sir.” I waste no time going straight towards the many abandoned cars.

My first victim was a red suv. It was a gold mine. Well a gold mine to a teenage girl. I squeal as I grab the pink juicy couture backpack. There has to be something good in here.

Pulling it open the first thing I see is mp3 player and some headphones. “Hell yeah!” Besides some other personal things I find deodorant and an unopened chapstick. Thank you Jesus for what ever queen ditched her car.

I then move to the trunk and pull out the pink suit case. This just keeps getting better and better. Unzipping it I find a whole bunch of clothes that seem close enough to my size. Slamming it shut I decided that I’m keeping it all and who even wants to say something can pry it out of my cold dead hands.

I haul it back to the RV with a smile on my face. “I haven’t seen you smile like that even when I gave you that chocolate bar.” Dale says with a raised eyebrow and an amused smile.

“I found my pink jackpot Dale. I couldn’t be any happier.” I wheeze out hauling up into the RV.

I walk back out sitting beside Dale listening to T ramble. “Shouldn't they be back by now?”

Dale takes a long look at him. “It's still light. Let's not worry, just yet. How are you feelin'? T-dog? I asked you how you were feeling just now. Please don't blow that question off.”

“It really, really hurts. It's throbbing something awful.” Welp now I feel bad for wanting to kick him earlier.

Dale asked to see him arm but T flips out. “Ah, don't-don't touch it!” Ouch that looks really bad.

Dales face twist in even more worry. “Yeah, that would be-that would be stupid. I-I've been saying since yesterday, we gotta get you some antibiotics. We've been ransacking these cars the whole time. I can't believe that we have not found some ampicillin, or something in the-in the whole place. Ivy go see if you can find anything even Tylenol.”

“Ok, on it”

I found nothing after what felt like forever. I get back the same time as the others. But not all of them are there. Glen tell us about how some girl came and took Lori saying Carl was shot. Kids are dropping like flies in this camp and I’m lowkey starting to worry I’ll be next.

“We can’t just leave!” Carol cries out.

“Carol, the group is split. We're scattered and weak.” Dale tries to reason with her.

“What if she comes back and we're not here? It could happen.” As much as I would like that I don’t have much hope in that happening.

“If Sophia found her way back and we were gone, that would be awful.” Andrea says not helping.

Daryl looks at Carol then speaks. “Okay. We gotta plan for this. I say tomorrow morning is soon enough to pull up stakes. Give us a chance to rig a big sign, leave her some supplies. I'll hold here tonight, stay with the RV.”

“If the RV is stayin', I am too.” It’s like Dale and that RV are attached at the hip…if an RV had a hip.

The group continues to make a plan as I hang back it’s not like they’d listen to anything I had to say so I saw no reason to pay attention.

Thankfully Daryl’s weird ass brother had stds so T got some good meds. So I guess something good came out of today.

A/N

This is my first time actually fully trying writing a fic so mange your expectations lol. I’m trying to get better at writing so tips are appreciated. I really hope y’all like it. Also POOKIE IS NEXT CHAPTER YAYY!!! 😏😏😏

Series master list

[sahhr-akira-studiesmed]

JOURNAL ENTRY - July 18, 2024

My exams are over. Well at least the ones before the finals. I had continuous exams for almost 17 days. It was exhausting and I am exhausted. I have my finals next month.

I also realised that my prep for the exams is a joke really but I got through it and I did that because I need to finish what I started. I'm pretty sure I'll be failing my physiology. My med school has the worst physiology department and professors really— reading slides and the class is over and done with. It made my foundation in physiology laughable and weak. It's my fault in those terms— I should have been a better planner and found a way out through understanding the material.

In my anatomy viva— I called a part of jejunum— duodenum because it resembled a c-shaped organ which was stupid of me and a blunder on my part and I had to hear some not so nice taunts from my examiner. Duodenum is retroperitoneal. I told myself to never forget what it feels like to be humiliated but I fear I will forget.

I'm on the verge of a breakup because of my routine and how busy it got because of med school for the last three or so months and I believe that is the right thing. It's not a good thing but it's the right thing for now. It was really difficult at the beginning, the realisation but I can't give up on my dream for this. Not for this. And there were a lot of personal things that pushed towards this— that I don't want to mention on the internet but it's mostly because of the routine I am in that I have no choice over.

I have been told that I am too negative. That all I talk about is being in pain, struggling and difficult things. That all I do is complain. I wish I wasn't like that. I wish I wasn't myself when it came to this. I've been told by my friends that I make everything sound like a struggle — perhaps because how much of it actually is a struggle and that's what hurt me because they don't understand it and they really feel like they have the right to tell me what I should and shouldn't be struggling with.

Socialising is a struggle for me. Speaking is a struggle for me. Having to focus is a struggle for me. Making sure I eat and maintain my health is a struggle. Sleeping used to be a struggle. I'm hypersensitive, hyper aware, overthinking, over planning, Executive dysfunction, time blindness. I have it all.

They don't understand it because they don't understand the resistance, the kind that I feel with everything— I feel resistance against existence. Getting up from bed, feeding myself, studying. For them the resistance goes away once they start. My resistance continues until it's over— everything about me never stops resisting everything. To let something happen, to continue something to happen, to the end of that happening— a huge part of me is always in a battle against that resistance.

Sometimes people ask me why I got depressed— as in what was the reason? They can't comprehend that there could be multiple reasons and that I can't say what the reason was because I don't know either too. It doesn't even cross their minds of what that experience is like. I can always tell by their expressions because they always appear confused and/or uncomfortable.

So when people tell me if I'm being a Debbie downer I can't help but feel hurt.

Now back to my studies, I always want to rebel against what I'm being told to do. I don't know why it's like that. I always want to rebel against when I am told something by someone who places themselves in a place of authority. I can't bring myself to respect anyone who thinks that they are superior somehow. I'm polite by default but I can't bring myself to trust anyone who places themselves as an authority upon my head. I hate that. I don't think I am capable of working under some who I can't respect and once I respect someone— then I listen to the said person like nothing else.

I have a visceral hate for the "system" and the "people" who uphold it. I never want to work for the system.

So exams feel like an imposition, that someone superior to us is there to judge us. I hate that so much I cannot even describe my thought process of what it's like when I'm giving an exam. Especially when they teach shit. How dare they be cruel to someone for not knowing something— fucking teach. That's one fucking job you got. Or at least— if you can't be kind about it, don't be a fucking bitch about it. You don't get to decide who is worthy and who isn't and especially who gets to be worthy. How difficult is it to tell someone what they are doing wrong and correcting them with kindness?

I'M JUST USELESSLY RANTING NOW AND MAKING EXCUSES. *SIGH*

Can we just please be kinder to one another? The system is never going to be kind but can we just please be kind to one another. Or existence makes no sense at all. Not one bit.

If it's not for kindness, then what is all this for? It can't be for anything else.

[two-reflections]

Been ill for the past week. Still not doing great now. (More info below.) But whatever, I'm back, though I'd be surprised if anyone noticed I wasn't around thanks to my queue. 😅

Haven't written anything for MMM because I haven't been awake for long enough each day to do much writing aside from bits for the upcoming exchange. I suppose I'm awake enough now to do a quick story audit, though. Click the Read More to see what I'm working on, and how I'm doing.

Writing Audit:

Aside from the first, these are vaguely in order of completeness/when they're likely to be posted.

TOP PRIORITY - Fic for the summer exchange. I have been doing some reading, and have put together an outline. I'm excited about this one, I really hope my giftee will like it. The problem? If I stick to this outline, the story will be several chapters long, and I'm probably not well enough to write all of it before the deadline. I wonder if it's acceptable to only put up a chapter or two of a gift exchange fic and finish it over the next few months?

Of Steel and Flesh - The next chapter was largely written back in January after the game that inspired this story, but as a consequence, it feels a bit too much like a TTRPG summary... It needs to be fleshed out more. Also, should it be split into two chapters? Unfortunately, while I love this story, it probably takes me the most effort to write, so it has been hard to work on recently. (Update the next day - Put out a chapter of this! Took me weeks to get it together.)

Alpha Legion short - I have a Alpha Legion short I threw together for an MMM post a while ago but I didn't post it because it was more silly than hot. My concern with this one is that I could easily see it becoming something much longer, like Iron Will, Crimson Whispers did. I don't have the space for another long project now, so I've been ignoring this one for a while. But I like it, and it shouldn't take too long to edit it...

Even in Death - The final chapter is basically complete, I just need to decide if I'm moving one section earlier so all the flashbacks will be in chronological order or if I should leave it as it is so there is a happier flashback following a sadder one. Once that's done, I can edit and post it.

Vulkan x Roboute short - Started outlining something for a friend. The pairing is cute and I want to make her something nice involving her OTP. This one will take me some research, though, so it probably won't be ready until after July. (Update - I guess I have to put on my clown makeup now, because I was reading The Art of War for unrelated reasons and ended up YOLOing this one.)

July MMM - One of the discord servers I'm in has been very keen on MMM recently. We're choosing a couple of prompts each month. Problem is, I recently wrote two stories that were a bit similar to July's prompts ("It's raining outside" is a thing in Feel for It, "knives and blood" was a thing in Afterparty). I've got something ready for it, though. Just need to wait til next Monday to post it.

Techmarine Story - This one is still in EARLY days. It doesn't even have a complete outline, just like 7-8k words in disconnected sections. I think I may need to severely narrow the scope of this one and make it either a oneshot or 3-6 short chapters. But I can't think about it anytime soon now I've signed up to a fic exchange.

Salamander Slice-of-Life Romance - My comfort project. It's coming along bit by bit, I probably add about 1k words to it a month. Still, I'm not in any sort of hurry to finish it. This is the one I really don't think anyone but me will ever want, haha. It's literally just an Astartes' first year or two on the job in a reserve company. Lots of mundanity, city life, squad dynamics, smaller deployments, and a romance with his brander-priest. I love it. It'll be ready when it's ready.

How I Am:

Warning, this is kind of a rant.

I miss being well. I was SO prolific just a month ago, before I got Covid again and had to go off my narcolepsy meds for an unrelated reason.

Even mild Covid sucks, but untreated narcolepsy is fucking shite. I've been on meds since I was 19, so I forgot how disabling it is. It felt less crushing before I was diagnosed, but at that point, that was the only way I had ever lived. Now, I've spent eleven years without the constant sleep attacks, and I can't remember how I used to manage this. (Probably badly since I ended up doing a full sleep study, lol.) It feels like I'm out of practice, if that makes sense? This whole thing has really thrown me for a loop.

Aside from writing, I haven't been painting much because I fall asleep when I sit still for more than a few minutes. Coffee helps, but I can only have one a day, so I'll drink my one coffee and then get a decent hour or two of painting at most before I'm back to being a bit useless. That may sound like a lot, but I'm a very slow painter. So, that's no fun.

I really don't want to just complain. My life is great, I'm very lucky to have a lovely spouse and not to be in a position where my narcolepsy could endanger my job or leave me homeless. I'm also lucky to be in the UK, where my diagnosis was free and I could actually afford eleven years of treatment without difficulty. But, fuck me, I want to be able to do normal human things again without falling asleep. This isn't forever, I'm off them for a good reason, but it may be a long time before I can go back on.

Ending on a happy note:

Hopefully, two friends and I will get to play Blood Bowl soon. She has played the digital version, he used to play but hasn't played for decades, and I've never played at all, so it should be a lot of fun. Plus, if there's three of us, whoever isn't playing can sub in for me if I fall asleep, haha.