#old lady learnings

[thirtyknives]

Back Up Often, Back Up Local.

Hey kids, it's your local elder millenial coming at you live to remind you that anything on a cloud server or a social media network (including this one) is not to be considered secure. If you have artwork or writing you value, back up often, and back up local. Storage space is cheap, get yourself some USB sticks or an external drive and store that shit, or god forbid, if you're lucky enough to have access to an optical drive every so often burn a disc of archived works. There is no promise that an online server you post to will be there tomorrow. I've just learned that ello shuttered overnight and took down all the artwork stored there. It's no big one to me because I store local, but there's a lot of people who are hurting due to the loss, and I've been there kids. I did heaps of really interesting writing and artwork that I published on servers that don't even exist anymore. Even well maintained, well loved servers reach the end of their lifespan and are switched off, decommissioned, and or compromised. Power outages, natural disaster, the works - keep it in your own hands, and you know exactly where it is and what state it's in.

If you have questionable living arrangements or dangerous people around you that make your art or writing insecure at home, the next best thing is to email to a trusted friend and get them to download and store local.

Storing across multiple platforms is better than nothing, I guess, if you don't have that option - so Google Drive and Protondrive, multiple different email addresses (mail them back and forth) and private posts on networks on which you don't usually publish (Dreamwidth is still going strong and is actively involved in fighting restrictive social media laws - they deserve your attention).

If you write in Google docs, for the love of pterry back it up or post it privately somewhere else once it's done.

No one tells the young people, so I am going to - back up often, and back up local. If you live through your art, keep it in your own hands. Do not trust corporations to keep your shit safe for you, and remember - you can never have too many backups.

[badassindistress]

Sometimes you gotta look back to see how much you've improved:

On the left is my first lacy on a whim petticoat, made in 2021. On the right the one I made this year.

Three years can make such a difference in creating the level of lacy floofiness I want in my life!

[bumblingbabooshka]

Thinking about marriage/women's rights on Vulcan Some may think that T'Pring not being allowed to divorce Spock was because he was going through the pon farr but if she were allowed to divorce him at all she probably would have done that a long time ago, confirmed by T'Pol when she's speaking with Koss, who isn't suffering from the pon farr. She says that he can choose another mate (without invoking a fight it seems: note the difference between a 'mate' and a 'challenger') and after he makes it clear that nothing she says will change his mind about marrying her, she finally threatens to declare a kal-if-fee. It's clear that Vulcan women cannot divorce/refuse to marry a man they've been betrothed to under any circumstances if A) He himself doesn't consent to ending their marriage or B) She doesn't have someone else waiting in the wings to be given to in his stead. Though, if the challenger she selects fails to win the fight, she'll have to marry her betrothed anyway unless (again) he decides he doesn't want her after the challenge. That seems like an incredibly unfair system, heavily biased towards men. SNW is an alternate universe in many obvious respects but most egregiously in that T'Pring has a lot of non-canonical agency over her relationship with Spock. It's interesting to me that Vulcan society has women in many positions of power and treats women as equal to men from what I've seen despite these laws. We don't really see Vulcans exhibiting a misogynistic attitude towards women in general but in TOS (perhaps because of its general writing style but it's still interesting to note) both Sarek and Spock take on patriarchal attitudes specifically regarding wives. Amanda says that 'of course' Sarek commands her because "he is a Vulcan and I am his wife." It's worthwhile in my eyes to note that she specifies 'wife' instead of attributing this attitude to women as a whole. Again, with TOS' writing style it wouldn't be out of place for her to say "he is a man and I am a woman." Spock, while in a pon farr induced irritation, states that it's "undignified for a woman to play servant to a man that isn't hers" - again implying that there's something specific about being a Wife in Vulcan society which is different from being a woman in general and demands subservience to a husband. This could perhaps stem from the extreme sense of ownership that Vulcan law has permitted men to have over women. A woman legally cannot point blank refuse marriage. There is no option which guarantees she won't have to marry her betrothed other than death. When T'Pau speaks of T'Pring she refers to her as being 'property' and Stonn, before being interrupted, states he's made 'the ancient claim' - we don't know what this is because he gets cut off but it's obvious they're both using the language of Vulcan law. Men are permitted true freedom to choose. If a woman wants to choose someone else to be with there is no option available to her other than the kal-if-fee which might result in the death of the one she wants to be with. And, if her lover fails, her husband can still just decide he wants to marry her and she'll be forced to. T'Pring gives two scenarios: One where Spock 'frees' her and one where he doesn't - it's still ultimately his decision which is clear when he ends the conversation with "Stonn, she is yours." This again isn't just because of the pon farr as T'Pol also goes through this. Koss can choose another mate and when the option is talked about there's no implication that this would result in any sort of fight (both by the casualness of its mention and by the fact that there's no formal word for it unlike the kal-if-fee.) Also, the fact that Koss does eventually grant T'Pol a divorce and it's all fine means that T'Pol isn't lawfully required to have another man waiting if her HUSBAND doesn't want her. It's ONLY required if SHE doesn't want her husband. Tradition must take precedence over individual desire UNLESS!!! You're a man. Then it's fine. Like, your parents might not be happy but legally you're golden.

[cozylittleartblog]

me speeding to count stock as fast as possible to avoid taking radiation damage from my parents god-awful taste in television

are these Really the ugliest homes in america or is your personality just equivalent to a cheap, wet paper towel. are these Really the ugliest homes in america or do you take your home decor inspiration from psychiatric hospitals and white women on pinterest named Meykaighlahe

just say you hate art and go build your dream unseasoned microwave mashed potato of a house in fucking utah or something oh my gOD

[freedelusionshere]

When I was on tumblr many years ago, it was kind of a thing to post how you identify in your header in order to make it feel like a safer space and be transparent.

When I came back because of my love for The Bear and Sydcarmy (fleeing Reddit TBH), and wanting to experience more diverse and accepting views instead of a white echo-chamber, I noticed a lot of that had stopped. Or maybe back then, I was in a community that gave a lot of care to that, but it made sense and still does.

I did notice immediately that a lot of Black women and WOC do still put those identifiers there and that’s for a reason. Maybe other people haven’t felt the need to do this before when they ship stuff, but I do think it’s important when half of the ship is a Black woman, or when half of the ship is a marginalized person, period, to do this little bit of work. Because it will enrich your life.

It’s not to call people out, it’s to give people in the community context as to where that person is coming from when you interact with them. It lets us all decide for ourselves how we will engage with each other. We can make mistakes and work things out.

When you make it ambiguous, I don’t think it ultimately helps in building community. It might be hiding out from opinions you probably need to see.

I would just consider maybe being clear about that and thinking about how that might be helpful going forward?

[blamedorange]

Lady in red

Her dress was her armor

As she passes by they wonder

How did she get such a vibrant color ?

A color, so crimson, that spreads from the core . . .

[hanzajesthanza]

the training montage in crossroads re-ignited a headcanon i had of geralt waking up and doing gymnastics, performing kickflips and mid-air spins around on a fencepost outside an hour before sunrise to ‘limber up,’ and bleary-eyed dandelion wrapping himself up in a blanket to be like "heyyy... what the hell are you doing 💖"

[mothscotch]

i had ideas yesterday

[ganondoodle]

so with echoes of wisdom .. i havent watched any of the trailers beyond the very first one and the thumbnails/screenshots and what others have said about it-

but with the world inside the rift being called "Welt des Nichts" aka "world of nothing/void" in german ('still' in english, for some reason) and demises title in french being "avatar of nothing" ... yeah my anxiety is shooting through the roof again

(hopefully you can be a little more forgiving for me being anxious/weird about it bc demise is my blorbo)

i had similar worries with totk, that werent proven true thankfully, but the darn book is making it all worse again with all those weird lore things the game doesnt even so much as hint at AND potential retcons- im in for a really rough time huh, not just stress in real life (more in tags.. its alot) but now about my specific hyperfixation from two things even (AND artblock still..)

weird as it may sound, i dont want demise to get more lore, partly bc i dont believe theyd do anything with him that i would like (given their track record) but much more importantly- the fact that he has this little lore about him is precisely one of the reasons why i fell in love with him, i tend to like characters that are neglected by the narrative, and his story being both so flat and already done meant i can be very creative with what i come up with for him without necessarily contradicting anything in canon (which is ... or was a big point of how i wrote destiny's story and lore, working with canon in a way that reframes it all without straight up ignoring it ... but i suppose i urgently need to let go of that and accept i spend alot of time working things that will go to waste :( ) AND not having to worry that there will be more stuff with him that would massively change not only what im writing but also potentially how i feel about him since the game he was briefly in was the oldest chronologically and ended with his death- i didnt expect them to mess with anything that far back and thought theyd just go forward and leave the timeline behind and wouldnt mess with it again, given how botw seemed to be a sort of 'fresh start' that seemingly regarded the past as the past that needs to rest and that the timeline was finally no longer a discussion if everythings unified through botw and one thing going forward

but i suppose i was very wrong with that .__.

right now the only thing that motivates me still is the left over determination and spite to work on my zelda comic, since i have never gotten this far and really want to get something done for once, but i cant lie that im feeling like i should pause all work on it too to wait and see waht the book and the new game will do .. either to determine if i still have the will to keep working on it after those things are out (my love for tloz has been taking alot of hits lately ..) or if i have to change stuff (mostly bc of my lore problem trying to not ignore it ..)

[eshithepetty]

'Where are the he/him lesbians in media' does greg universe mean nothing to you

[eri-pl]

Silm Advent calendar 19: Maternity

Warnings: pregnancy, mention of children mortality, implication of offscreen sex (most shippy scene I wrote in a long time, but it's still entirely SFW), old couple being flirty, a linguistic pun which Tolkien would probably hate, and weird characters names (for a reason, but is this a good reason?). Also, the setting is also further from mainstream Silm than in the others. It is still canon compatible, it's just one of the empty spaces on the margins of the central story

Once there was a couple who could not have a child. So the wife went to a fire and asked for a child. But Psta was not this wife, even though she kept the fire lit at every place they settled into, because the mountains were cold.

Once, there was a couple who could not have a child, so the wife took in a wolf cub and raised it as her own. But Psta was not this wife, even though she would gladly take another’s child to raise, but each orphan had someone closer in the family than her.

Once, there was a couple who could not have a child, so Psta sat in a clearing, in the warm sun, and cried. It was not the worst thing that could happen— they were healthy and had food, and the mountains grew safer with each move westward. And the forest would grow, the world would live on regardless of what happens to her family. And yet, she cried. The pines sang in the wind.

Her people were probably a strange sight for the trees— traveling from far away, they have changed their language a couple times since her ancestors started the journey, borrowing words from other tribes and from the woodland spirits. The spirits told them to go West, even if they themselves did not. Psta felt that it was stupid, but what would she know? She was just an old, sad woman.

The sun went west too, and the sun surely knew what she was doing —  that’s what the healer said. But for Psta it would make more sense to go east, back home, because that was where the sun came from. It was easier to meet with someone when going in the opposite direction, wasn’t it? She wondered how the sun came back east every night, but she had no idea. She was just a simple wife. So, when the chief and the healer said that in the west would be their home, she followed. They also said that the sun first came from the west and that back east there was shadow. They were wise people, even though young.

So she would follow west and not complain about the empty house, where just she and Cern and the dogs lived. But now she cried and the trees lulled her to sleep.

She came to the clearing quite often in the summer and the trees seemed to like it. It was a happy thought: when she’d be gone, the pines would remain. And the woodland spirits, impossible to spot when they did not want it.

One day she dreamed of a boy, but it was not as happy a dream as she would expect. She awoke and— why not? She was old, she didn’t care for people laughing anymore.

She found Cern mending an axe.

“Let’s have a child.”

He laughed. “We are old, wife. Have you talked to the woodland spirits, or bonfires?”

“I dreamed. There is no fault in trying.”

“I could surely use a rest from this rusty thing… but do not hope for much.”

“How will you stop me from hoping?” She laughed like a girl and pretended to run away from him.

A season later, when the first snow came, she cooked her grandmother’s best soup, with honey and garlic.

“What happened? Did your niece get engaged?”

She laughed. “ Not, and I doubt that’s going to happen. But the moon has gone and came and gone again, and my moon has not.”

Cern avoided her eyes. “You are old. Your hair is turning silver. It’s just winter, not anything else.”

“Maybe. Even so, the trees will grow and the world will be glad.”

“You are just as strange as when we were young,” he said tenderly and started eating the soup.

In the spring her belly was unmistakably the shape of the full moon, and everyone in the village whispered that Psta had traded with the woodland spirits— or worse. She did not care.

“I will name him pine forest,” she said to Cern and all the distant family, as they were taking a break from planting.

All the women, and many men, gave her horrified looks. How could she name a child before it was even born — and not with a humble enough name. But they moved settlements every ten or so years, why would they not move everything else? She was old and did not care, and the pines seemed to like it.

“If it’s even a him,” said her sister condescendingly. She did not say ‘and if he even lives’ but she did not have to. Everyone knew how it was with children.

“I’m sure it’s a him. And that he will be a good man.”

(explanation for non-Polish-nor-Czech people)

(explanation for people not interested in niche Silm characters)

[tikara]

Sometimes I miss actively participating in fandoms, but sometimes I see things that remind me how these days I find myself having a better time just keeping to myself and the small handful of people/groups I trust while still tossing some art out there publicly every so often.

[queen0fm0nsterz]

(WIP) I love when I accidentally draw a good composition.... needs fixing but... I slayed I fear

[cryingoverfictionalcharacterss]

One thing Feyre does a lot trough the series, after she leaves Tamlin, is that she constantly compares Tamlin to Rhysand. One of the things that made a big impression on her is how Tamlin said to her how there wasn’t a HL but then Rhysand made her one(undeserved). 

But the funny thing is that in the 4-5 months she spend in the SC (after UTM) as Tamlin’s consort she was WAY more loved and respected than she is as the HL of the NC for 3 years now.

[asmidge]

considering Tokis parents had a vow of silence I feel like Toki had delayed speech/didn’t learn to speak until he was a littler older. like his only exposure to people talking was hearing church sermons. he wasn’t hearing people talk consistently since his parents didn’t talk to him so it took him longer to learn it

[peony-pearl]

June was the only woman older than Katara and Suki to show up and help the Gaang in the finale and I think that’s ridiculous. We could have seen Yagoda and the Herbalist in the White Lotus (and Miyuki!! She has a cute miniature lotus collar). Perhaps even Haru’s mom showing up somewhere??  IDK the lack of older ladies as respected guides and teachers is irksome and until further notice I’m headcanoning out of spite that they were there we just didn’t see their scenes but they were there dammit