#okay so the problem is. most of the people in choir are. friends with someone that hates me | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

issaxcharlie · 4 years ago

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Spectacular!

Pairing: Alive! Luke Patterson x Fem Reader

Summary: Inspired by Nickelodeon’s Spectacular! Luke Patterson needs the money for his bands demo, and miraculously, that same night he gets an offer to fix his problem. The catch? Rockstar boy has to join his school’s show choir and put up with their fearless Female Lead Singer. (don’t come here searching for accuracy remember it’s inspired by a movie)

Note: I had a lot of fun with this one, hope you like it! Oh and it’s a little long so keep it in mind +8k👀💜

Say this is not her scene would be to fall short, but she has to make sacrifices to find greatness. The first thing she notices when she walks into the little club, is that it's packed. The people look excited and somewhat desperate and she doesn't blame them. The pamphlet marked they were supposed to start at 8:00 p.m. and it's already 8:40. She makes her way carefully until she finds a perfect place in the middle of the room.

The musicians take the stage visibly anxious, especially Alex who cannot stop moving his hands trying to probably calm himself down. Reggie and the rhythm guitarist take their positions. They look at each other one last time before beginning to play the enveloping sound of the pop-rock song. The bass line sounds insane and she hasn't heard Alex play drums in years, he’s exceptional. They could both play without their singer all night and she wouldn't mind.

The space in the center of the stage that belongs to who she came to see today, completely empty. The bassist seems about to take the first verse when Sunset Curve lead guitarist and vocalist Luke Patterson appears on stage.

She has seen him multiple times in the hallways laughing with her childhood best friend, Alex Mercer and her lab partner, Reggie Peters, but she has never spoken directly to him. Still, it's hard not to notice how handsome he is and how much of a charismatic personality he has.

“I'm living my life just the way I like, they say I get a little too loud. Try to push me in a box, over analyze. But I'm never gunna turn it down”

His voice is enchanting and mesmerizing, a sound that immediately reminds her of the best rockers in history and his movements and energy are electrifying. In seconds the entire audience is jumping and dancing to the beat.

“They say never and I say right now!” Y/N analyzes him excitedly. The passion with which he sings and plays his guitar reminds her of when she is on stage, although the two of them dedicate themselves to totally different things, their love for music is the same. She definitely has a lot of work to do to polish him and make him the perfect performer she needs, but if there's anyone who can accomplish the impossible, it's her.

“No one's gonna stop me tonight! Thank you, we are Sunset Curve, tell your friends!” The presentation ends and Sunset Curve leaves the stage. The girl moves quickly to catch up with them at the back of the club, but when she finally arrives, screams can be heard from two of the members of the band.

“I know you don’t like me, Bobby. But trying to sabotage the show by giving me the wrong time is just the most stupidest thing you've ever done!” The guitarist looks furious, his muscles are really tense and Y/N can't help staring at his biceps way more than she probably should.

"This fight of egos between the two of you has to stop, we can no longer continue to be in the middle." The bassist cries out, tired of all the bickering.

“You no longer have to, Reggie. It’s time to decide. The lousy rocker or me. Remember that the money for the demo is mine before choosing... I'm not sure Patterson's lyrics can compete without the money to record them.”

The guitarist looks down at the ground, a mixture of anger and sadness on his face. Alex and Reggie turn to see each other for a second and then position themselves on either side of Luke, no sign of doubt on their faces.

“We’ll find a way without you. Let’s see If you find one without us.�� Reggie declared with a little smirk. Bobby grabs his stuff and gets into his truck without looking back, completely furious.

"Some things Bobby was angry about are true and you have to improve them. You are not a solo artist, you are part of a band." Alex points to Luke as soon as the truck is out of sight, but before he can respond the blonde intercepts the girl at the door.

“Y/N?” The three of them turn to see her, Reggie smiles at her while Luke looks pissed off.

“Hey guys, I came to talk to Luke.” Luke frowns in surprise while the other two gape for a few seconds.

"Really?” Y/N turns with a murderous face towards her friend, who puts his hands in his pockets and begins to walk. “...Okay. Meanwhile Reg and I are going to figure out how to get the drums in Luke's car."

"If you come for an autograph please be quick, I don't feel like socializing." The guitarist declares to the wind, not wanting to pay attention to the stranger who approaches him in the middle of the alley, no matter how cute she looks.

“I’m not a fan.” She confesses in a firm voice, trying to measure the situation.

"Oh, then I'll go. See you later beautiful." He's about to leave when her voice stops him.

“Patterson, come back here!” There's something about her tone that makes Luke suddenly interested. He turns to see her carefully, her chin is up, her shoulders back. Her lips are press together and her eyes look determined and he can't help but admit that the confidence she projects is really doing something to him.

“2 minutes, firecracker.”

“I’m Y/N Y/L.” Faced with no comment from the guitarist, she decides to continue. “I need a male lead singer for my group and I think you might be the perfect fit, after I'm done with you, of course."

He’s unable to believe what he hears. “A band? I think you know pretty well I'm already in one.”

“It’s not a band, it’s a group. THE group If I can say so myself. Spectacular!” She affirms with the first smile he sees her that night, and he can't believe it is possible that she can look even more beautiful.

"Don't you think you're exaggerating a bit with the spectacular thing? At least tell me the name or what kind of band is." She rolls her eyes and he chuckles in response, thinking it was adorable and hot at the same time.

“I already told you, Spectacular! It’s a show choir.”

“Is this a joke? Did Bobby sent you?”

“No and no. I know it’s not really your style, but I’m telling you I can make it work. I heard a bit of the conversation you had with the band, the prize of Nationals is 10,000 dollars. I'm willing to give you half for the demo, if we win, obviously. And I can assure you we will if you accept and do absolutely everything I say.”

“Firecracker, are you trying to tell me that all I have to do to raise the money is put on some stupid cowboy or tiger-print outfit and humiliate myself in front of an entire audience with my best jazz hands? Wow, sounds like a dream!” Maybe he got a bit too sarcastic, but meh, as pretty as she is, she's still a stranger.

“My name is Y/N, and I'm not appreciating your tone of voice.” By this moment the girl seems tired of the musician, who feels the frustration in her and tries to be more gentle.

“I- I’m sorry. Thanks for the offer, but I don't feel as desperate yet as to end my reputation in that way. I hope you find what you are looking for, but that’s just not me. I'm just a guitarist.” She nods, entwining her arms against her chest. He admires her for a few more seconds and turns to his car, where his friends are already waiting for him to help with the drums.

Before getting behind the wheel he turns to her one last time, but she is nowhere to be seen.

Fights between Luke and Bobby weren't new to the band. The big-headed attitude of both collided practically all the time and things had been getting worse in recent months with the more overconfident attitude of the guitarist, but they never imagined that they would end up in this situation.

The days go by and the boys are running out of time. They have to deliver the demo to the Orpheum offices in two months so that they can be taken into account for the great concert they will hold at the end of the year presenting the best new talents in the city. All they've heard from Bobby is that he's trying to build his own band but without much success. Still, he doesn’t fold his hands and continues to try on his own.

The three remaining members of Sunset Curve are in Alex's room lying on the floor with their instruments around trying to think of solutions, when Y/N's voice coming from outside refreshes the blonde's memory. “What did Y/N want to talk to you the other day?”

“Who?” Luke narrows his eyes in confusion.

“Y/N? The captain of the school’s show choir? She went to talk to you after Bobby left the band. Small, fire in her eyes, a lot of attitude.”

“OH, Firecracker! So that group is our school's choir? that's even worse. She tried to recruit me, even offered me the money for the demo if we win the competition in which they will participate.”

“What? She wants you in Spectacular? What did you said?” Alex heard that his friend's ex-boyfriend broke up with her and joined last year's national champions, but he never imagined that she would try to replace him with someone like Luke. Luke is distracted by a melody and doesn’t answer his friend's question.

"Why does your mom always leave her music on when she leaves to work?" The music is definitely not his style, they are always usually pop songs or even songs from musicals, but the singer's voice is one of the most beautiful he has ever heard so it never bothers him.

“It’s not her music, is Y/N.” Alex responds, wondering what the young woman is up to since she is never usually home at this hour.

“Who?” Alex's eyes widen, not able to believe his friend.

“Really? I already told you!” The guitarist tilts his head and shrugs. “Firecracker?”

“What does firecracker have to do with this?” Alex opens his balcony curtains and the silhouette of a young woman singing and dancing through her transparent pink ones comes to their visions.

“She’s so good bro, I thought it was a record too.” Reggie looks at her with a big smile as Alex rolls his eyes at Luke.

As soon as he sees her, the musician is in a trance, admiring the grace and energy with which she moves, wanting with all his might to remove the pink curtain that does not allow him to see her properly.

The song ends and a well-known melody begins to play with prominent bass and drums. “Guys, shut up! I’m trying to hear her sing.”

“It’s not us, man.” Reggie answers almost screaming with how loud the girl’s music is.

“What do you-” Luke turns around and sees his friends with their hands raised, the cables finally connecting in his brain. "She is listening our song?"

"Not just listening, she's also destroying your career, her vocals are amazing." The black-haired boy adds, smirking and running to connect his bass.

Luke excitedly opens the balcony window and sings the pre-chorus as loud as he can to get the singer's attention. “Call me in the morning to apologize, every little lie gives me butterflies.” She immediately turns around and smiles at the guitarist's cocky smile. She opens the curtain and the window and her sunset curve t-shirt is the first thing the band notices.

“Something in the way you're looking through my eyes, don't know if I'm gonna make it out alive.” Luke sings seductively towards her, each word fully dedicated to the woman in front of him.

Reggie accompanies them with his bass while Alex looks at his friends incredulously, an "Are you fucking kidding me." Comes out of the blonde almost like a whisper when he identifies the shirt that the girl wears as his.

Both sing the chorus together and the chemistry is unquestionable. Alex had never thought of this two together because at first glance they seem completely different, but thinking about it a little more deeply they couldn't be more similar. They are both passionate, headstrong, live for the stage, and are ridiculously talented and confident.

“Fight so dirty, but you love so sweet. Talk so pretty, but your heart got teeth. Late night devil, put your hands on me. And never, never, never ever let go.”

The performance between the duo is playful, driving, sexy and intense and Alex and Reggie can't help but feel like they're interrupting a private moment. As soon as the song ends, the girl moves closer to the window, blows them a kiss and closes it.

"Where did that woman come from?" Luke whispers as he tries to catch his breath. Nobody had enchanted him so much just by singing, well, nobody had enchanted him, period. But she’s definitely something.

“She has been my neighbor since we were 6 years old, we used to be best friends but we both drifted apart when we entered high school. She’s amazing, the best performer in the city.” Alex informs him and then Reggie adds his own piece of valuable information. “She’s my lab partner. Fun, smart, beautiful, the whole deal. A true gem.”

“Answering your question, I said no to her offer. But I guess the group of someone this rad can't be that bad. And we really need the money." The drummer purses his lips and nods. His friend definitely took the hook.

"Honestly, I always wanted to audition, I guess the three of us could try in, to support you obviously."

“Of course man, she sounded desperate when she asked, and if the shirt and song is any indication she is definitely a huge Sunset Curve fan. She tried to fool me by saying she wasn't a groupie, as if that was possible after seeing us perform.”

His friends leave the house and Alex plays on the drums the secret signal he had with the girl when they were younger, a minute later the girl appears in her window with an amusing smile, dressed in her classic blue pajamas.

“Really?” The drummer chuckled and his friend’s smile grows even bigger, a little laugh leaving her lips. “The shirt was a nice touch. A little much, but that idiot must have fallen for it completely. I want it back by the way.”

“You can see right through me. You know the invitation is open, right? I would love nothing more than to have you there.” He has known her his whole life, and realized early on that she was just trying to get his friend's attention to reconsider her offer by raising his ego, and he honestly doesn't mind. It's about time Luke met someone of his caliber. Perhaps her influence could do him good.

“I- thank you. I guess we’ll see. See you tomorrow.” She blows him a kiss and closes the window. Tomorrow sure is going to be an interesting day, Sunset Curve joins Spectacular.

Having to face Spectacular! And telling them they still don't have a male lead singer who can compete against Damian was not easy. Her options are running out and she honestly doesn't know what to do to save them.

Damian on stage is the best, it pains her to admit that she has never seen anyone like him. At first she thought she could continue without him, but it’s becoming increasingly obvious that he is just impossible to replace.

Everyone continues to practice the routine, clearly discouraged after her bad news and it honestly breaks her heart. She knows how much the group means to everyone for different and personal reasons and she can't let them lose this. So whatever she has to do, she’ll do it so they can have the leader they deserve.

“I thought the children in the choir would have more energy, this is just sad, firecracker.” She hides her wide smile before turning to the owner of the voice, who is entering the auditorium with his best friends. Money really talks, otherwise she can't explain what would make him appear here.

“Dude, can you please play nice? This is important!” Reggie looks flustered and scolds Luke probably louder than he planned. The guitarist just ignores him and winks shamelessly at her. Seems her little plan from yesterday was successful, now she just has to play the situation in her favor.

“Mercer, Peters... Patterson. Can we help you with something?” The performer shows a perfect poker face, Spectacular continues to practice but they can't help but turn their attention to the rock band.

“I came to accept your proposal, but only If we can include Reggie and Alex in the deal. I guess as long as I’m in whatever I ask shouldn't be a problem." He crosses his arms and gives her a confident smile.

“I could actually do with a few more members, specially as talented as Reg and Alex. As for you, you've already turned down my offer Lucas, but if for some reason you don't graduate this year, make sure you audition the next one. Now, let’s start boys." Y/N moves within inches of Luke to gently close his open mouth with her index finger, and gives him a small wink before turning and taking the other two musicians each on each arm and pulling them closer to where the group is still practicing.

“Y/N, you can’t be serious.” The skilled singer continues to ignore him as she explains to her new members something Luke can't quite hear.

The musician frustrates and walks until he is directly in front of her. “Y/N” He groans.

“I'm not firecracker anymore? That is just sad.” Luke looks upset, but she's determined to not let him have what he wants after what he said at the club, so if he wants the money that bad he's going to have to prove it.

“I’m going to explain you something quickly so you can go and stop wasting my time. I’ve seen your band play, I know how good these two are at singing, which means I don't need you anymore, nor do I have to put up with your rockstar wannabee attitude. I need someone that I can connect with and have the chemistry that leaves everyone forgetting how to breathe, and after yesterday, I just don't think that's you.” Right now she is grateful to be such a good actress because yesterday's act melted her legs, even though they were separated by the balconies. This man is unreal, totally unfair.

"I do, I wouldn't be surprised if they kissed at any moment." The bassist whispers as Alex looks at him with an incredulous face, he just slowly shakes his head from side to side and continues to see the leader of their band and their new leader in a starting contest, is kind of an amusing sight since Luke is definitely not used to having to face someone like him.

“It’s like you said, you are just a guitarist. Thinking you could handle something like this was ridiculous of me. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have a group to direct."

Y/N hopes she hasn't pushed the rockstar too much, but remains firm in her tactics and turns to the others to continue with the rehearsal. She signals them to put the most similar song to the Sunset Curve sound that she can remember at the moment to make Alex and Reggie feel more calm and to see if she finishes catching Luke’s interest, who still doesn’t move from where he is with his eyes fixed on her, which she takes as as a good sign.

The moment the song start, both sunset curve members smile, and Luke's voice is heard from behind. “So you're the girl, I heard the rumor.” He sounds powerful and captivating and immediately sets everyone's eyes on him. She doesn’t give him the luxury of turning to see him, but he is not going to give up and in a quick and agile movement he turns her by the hand.

“Why don't you break my heart, make it hurt so bad. Come on give it your best, nothing less, I insist, I want it just like that.” The girl should have thought more about her choice before asking for a song like this. Every word that comes out of the musician's mouth is addressed directly to her with an intensity in his eyes and movements that should be illegal.

She tries to get out of his way but he makes it pretty clear that he's not singing to prove himself to the group, he's doing it to prove something to her. Specifically, to prove her wrong.

“Stare me down, intimidate me. Oh baby please you'll never break me.” He comes dangerously close to her, basically inches apart, his eyes fixed on her lips and smiling flirtatiously as he sings, his eyes glinting mischievously.

She enters the song so as not to make him feel like she’s defeated and starts dancing with him to the rhythm, their movements matching effortlessly as they move across the stage.

She pulls herself back as far as she can, but Luke surprises everyone by doing a body roll on the floor, his arms looking more gorgeous than ever in that sleeveless shirt as they take the full weight of his body without any problem, his eyes never losing contact with hers. All the girls start to do small screams while Y/N's cheeks turn red at her thoughts. He slides on his knees towards her and gets up as he puts his foot on her to make her lose balance and catch her right at the end of the song.

“Why don’t you break my heart.” They've been in a trance since the song started and it's like it's just the two of them in the auditorium. Their lips are almost touching, neither willing to give up eye contact or move from their current position, until the applause and shouts of excitement bring them back to reality.

“I have chemistry with everybody that I sing with, firecracker.” He whispers to her lips before shifting the girl's full weight to his right arm to raise his left one to her face and carefully close her mouth with his finger, winking with a cocky smile before lifting her up.

Immediately everyone begins to advocate for him with all kinds of arguments that ranged from how sensual he was to how much of a presence he had on stage. Her best friend’s comment is the one that catches his attention the most. "You have even more chemistry with him than Damian, I didn't think it was possible." That definitely sounds interesting.

Y/N pretends to listen to her teammates before saying Luke can enter the group. The truth is that she knew from the first moment she saw him perform with Sunset Curve that he was a star, but this facet without the guitar and irradiating passion from his pores was something that left her speechless.

Still, she knew all the work that would go into preparing the band and it really was exhausting. For them to understand that they couldn't just sing like they do at the club, that there are rules to follow, dance steps they have to learn, facial expressions they have to master, notes they have to hit perfectly, wasn’t easy but they succeeded.

Along the way, she regained her bond with Alexander, her friendship with Reggie grew stronger, and each day she felt closer to Luke. She has been practicing a duet with him for weeks now, and the chemistry that they have set to burn the stage more than once. It was hard for her to ignore how the guitarist's hands feel on her thighs as he lifts her or the way he wraps himself around her, breathing softly down her neck or brushing his lips teasingly over her cheekbone. Both are very physical to show affection so small contacts such as hugs or caresses, as well as small kisses on the cheek or hand were very recurrent. They had also gone out multiple times alone and with their friends, from the cinema, the park, to see them play, to small parties at home, to midnight talks.

Reggie was the one who had her alone the most because they were lab partners, but no matter how hard the bassist tried to get information from the girl, he never succeeded. The truth is that not even she knows what is happening with the guitarist, she is for the first time in her life letting herself be carried away and enjoying the moment, and she’s loving it.

Luke and Alex are in detention after the brown haired boy made a mess in the classroom by putting together a little concert with the help of the blonde, and as they die of boredom, his mind can’t help to go to her for the 14th time of the day. "How did she end up in the show choir?"

Alex is blank for a few seconds but analyzes the question and realizes who they are talking about. “Spectacular used to be the most important show choir in the country, led by her mother, may she rest in peace. Y/N always wanted to be a part of it and when she lost her, it became a goal. She suffered a lot to get to the perfect star we see today, especially because her father is rarely there since he works outside the country. She has practically had to face alone auditions, injuries, she had to learn to sew, comb her hair and put on makeup for the show, sing for hours her solos with no one to encourage her, without mention that the current director could not care less about the group and practically leaves all the work to her. That’s why she’s so be fearless, she kind of has to."

“I didn’t know.” The sight of Y/N as happy as ever with his mother when he took her home for lunch the week before appears in his memory. She looked radiant as she ate his mother's famous stew and listened to stories of little Luke as he gently stroked her thigh while songwriting with his other hand. When was the last time she got to experience something as homelike as that? Luke probably doesn’t want to know.

Alex's sad voice brings him back to the conversation.“I was supposed to be there, you know? At first I was. We were going to audition for Spectacular together, but that summer I met you and Sunset Curve was born, and I didn’t have the time anymore so I abandoned her. I knew how important it was for her to have me there, and I didn't even go to her audition. And do you know how many times she has reproached me? Not even one.”

Luke knows that Alex would never hurt her on purpose and that the situation was probably much more complicated than he expresses it, so he reassures him and lets him know that she loves him and is proud that he took his own path. As soon as the blonde calms down, he begins to tell him multiple stories about when he and the girl were kids, the songwriter takes out his journal and begins to add lyrics to the song he has been working on, more inspired than ever.

“You are falling so deeply for her, man. I’m happy for you both.” His friend comments to him while reading the verses written on the paper. He totally is.

“Bowling, nice. I'm going to finish you off, Patterson.”

“As sexy as your confidence sounds, I'm not going to let you win.”

“I'm pretty sure you've never gone bowling.” Alex adds with furrowed eyebrows.

“Your point is, Mercer?” She wrinkles her nose and sticks out her tongue. Reggie chuckles amused.

"How can you be so sure that you are going to win?"

“Oh, my dear cute blonde. I’m good at everything.” She makes a slight remark on everything with her eyes fixed on the guitarist, who chokes while blushing.

She smiles cheekily at him and confidently steps into the room, Sunset Curve behind as Alex and Reggie tease Luke for being completely whipped.

Happiness doesn't last long when the first thing they see inside is Damian Miller along with a couple of his new teammates. The moment their eyes meet, Y/N seems to melt, but not in the good way.

Her firm and perfect posture now all bent as she embraces herself with her arms and tries with the strength that has left to hold her gaze at the person who took everything from her without much more than an empty sorry.

When she feels the guitarist at her side again, she unconsciously stretches her hand to intertwine her fingers with him, who tilts his head to see their hands together and then to see her face.

She is not doing it to make Damian jealous, but to feel supported. And when Luke realizes it, he can't help not feeling angry at the boy in from of them. In the month that he has been with her, he has never seen her doubt, fear, or believe anything less than that she is unstoppable. And today for the first time ever he sees her intimidaded, and the fact that it's because of a jerk like this makes it even worse.

He rubbs her hand to make her feel less anxious and when she turns to meet his eyes, he brings his index finger to her chin and winks at her, hoping she gets the message. She seems to do it because she immediately smiles playfully and begins to look more relaxed.

The guitarist is aware that Damian was his firecracker's first boyfriend, and he also knows how much he betrayed her love and trust. No matter how strong the woman is, her reaction is completely normal and valid, and that she has the confidence to be vulnerable and let him be there for her means a lot to him.

“Princess.” Damian whispers as he moves closer to her, his eyes fixed on Y/N and Luke's clasped hands.

“I’m not your princess, Y/L is just fine. Listen, Damian. I could pretend this is not uncomfortable and boring but, I don't want to. So yeah, excuse us.”

She pulls the hand that joins her to Luke to make him walk and Alex and Reggie follow behind them, looking at her ex boyfriend with little smiles of pride. Alex knows how much Damian turned off Y/N’s spark and seeing her put him in his place makes him feel so proud.

"So someone is going to teach me bowling or what?"

“I’ll do it baby, but another day. Today we came here with a different purpose.” Luke points to the large Rock the World machine located in a comfortable corner space.

“Of course, is always about music with you, eh Patterson?” She smirks, getting a little closer to him.

“Pretty much, but I can tell that attracts you, Y/L.” He wrinkles his nose, his lips parting slightly.

“Hell yeah it does.” he smirks, not at all expecting her to admit it so openly but he definitely should have seen it coming.

“Good thing I’m into dominant firecrackers then.”

“Could you stop flirting for a second and start playing? I have plans to destroy Alex and your daily session of sexual tension is not going to ruin it.”

Both smile at Reggie while Y/N takes the games microphone and Luke the guitar. The song that Y/N chooses is She’s so gone by Naomi Scott, and it goes without saying that the boys have never played it in their lives but they love a challenge.

The mastery with which the girl interprets the song makes a good number of people come to see the round, including her ex-boyfriend and his new friends.

“Here I am, this is me, and I'm stronger than you ever thought I'd be. Are you shocked? Are you mad? That you're missing out on who I really am.”

The singer sings the verse directly towards Damian, as his friends start pointing out and teasing him. Reggie goes over to tell Luke he thought he would join her, but the guitarist only replies, "I want to see her shine."

She gets carried away with the music and draws Luke to her, jumping and twirling to the beat of the music. The guitarist hyping her up every single second og the song. At the end the night was incredible, the four of them spent it singing, dancing and even bowling, which Y/N ended up dominating from the second round.

Luke thought that there would be no better time than that night to show her what he had been working on, so after saying goodbye to her he went to Alex’s where he had left his journal.

Before he can say goodbye to the blond, screams are heard from the house next door. “I wasn't trying to embarrass you, Damian!”

“No? So what were you doing shaking your hips against the rock boy?”

“I don't have to explain anything to you, but I think it's pretty obvious why I wanted to be against that body, have you seen it?” She says it playfully with her eyes fixed on the guitarist, who is walking with the blonde to her door, her eyes glinting wickedly in the dark. He chuckles, knowing it's the girl's way of reassure him and she smiles as she sees his expressions relax.

“Everything alright, firecracker?” Luke does not stand in front of her like a brave prince, he stops a meter from both of them and asks before intervening, and that makes her heart melt. Because he wants to hear her first, he trusts that she can take care of it and has the confidence to tell him if she needs help, which is also completely valid. And it's something she has to work on, know that there are also times when it's okay to trust someone. That you don't always have to carry the weight alone.

“Go away, punk. My girl and I are in the middle of something.” The three of them start laughing at the ex-boyfriend's intimidation attempt, who seems to get angrier with every laugh that comes out of their mouths.

“I’m fine baby, but you guys could show him the way out? I’m tired of his bullshit.” She asks the boy with a cute smile, and he would disintegrate over the nickname if her horrible ex-boyfriend and her best friend weren't there.

"Don't touch me, I’ll go. Right now the numbers are not working in my favor so we will fix this where it really matters, on stage. Let's see if this attempt at a singer can save you from total humiliation, because let's be honest Y/N, you are nothing without me."

The faces of both members of Sunset Curve begin to tense, Luke's fists completely white from how much he's clenching them. For her part, the singer, who is already used to that type of comments from her ex-boyfriend, only tells him "yes, yes, you're right. It was a pleasure Dami, never come back." while pushing him to the other side to make him go away.

The nickname comes off her tongue in the most natural way in the world, she doesn't even seem to notice it and Luke feels some annoyance hearing it. As if someone had hit him in the stomach. But immediately the discomfort goes away when the girl turns to them again with a big smile and runs to hug them excitedly.

“Thanks for coming to check me out, guys. Things can sometimes get out of control with him.”

"We will always be there for you when you need us, okay? I actually went into Alex's house to get something I wanted to show you but it's late, I’ll come back tomorrow." The blonde turns from his friend to the other, a tired smile appears on his lips as he passes Luke his journal to place his arm on his childhood friend and lean on her.

"No, don't go please. Damian was pretty mad and... I don't want to be alone." She can be very dramatic at times but the fear in her voice sounds sincere, and remembering the scream that brought them outside in the first place Alex imagines how scared she really was before seeing them show up and his heart clenches at the thought.

“O- Okay, sure.” He sounds nervous but the excitement is evident in the way his left leg keeps moving, just like when he's on stage.

“I do have to go in, you already know mom. Will you be alright with just Luke?” He already knows the answer from the girl's radiant gaze but it doesn't hurt to confirm. She hugs him tightly with her arms around his neck and whispers a "Yes, I love you but go away already." which makes the drummer laugh out loud while high-fiving his other friend goodbye.

The third wheel enters his house and finally they are alone. She smiles and takes him by the hand to enter the house. Luke takes a moment to admire it, everything is in place but there are several instruments throughout the living room. A keyboard on the couch, a guitar next to the TV, even a tambourine on the table.

"May l?" He walks over to the guitar and turns to see the girl nodding and pointing up the stairs for him to follow. Her room is quite similar to her style, white is the predominant color but there are many details in pink and gold, as well as multiple yellow lights giving a romantic tone to the room at midnight.

“Do you want to show me now?” she asks eagearly, with joined hands, closed eyes and pursed lips.

“Y- yeah... of course.” He sits on the rug and puts the guitar aside, then puts his notebook between his legs and when he finds the sheet he is looking for, he carefully tears it off. The girl looks at him adoringly, the happiness of having him with her making her heart beat louder in her chest. She sits across from him making sure to brush his legs and waits for him to speak.

“Here.” He looks nervous, his cheeks totally flushed as he avoids eye contact for the first time since they met.

Y/N takes the sheet in his hands and a huge warm smile appears on her face when he sees the guitarist's terrible lyrics. BRIGHT written and highlighted several times in the title.

“It’s for you.” Luke whispers while bringing his face closer to hers, making her shiver.

“You wrote me a song?” She doesn't know what to say. Since her mom, no one had done anything so beautiful, considerate, and selfless for her. Something so vulnerable and full of love.

“Don’t be mad, but Alex told me a little about how you ended up in show choir, your friendship with him, your mom.” He turns to see her looking for her reaction, she just nods to tell him it’s okay to continue. “A sweet story about a little girl with the voice of an angel who loved to sing love songs. And you know what was in my head all that night? That even though I've never written one, I would write millions of love songs for you.”

Some tears fall from the girl's face, she carefully places the lyrics on the guitar and throws herself on the guitarist, who falls in surprise against the carpet, making sure to grab her by the waist so that she falls safely on his chest. She rests her arms on either side of his head and brings her lips against Luke's, brushing them gently.

Luke doesn't move a muscle, not wanting to do something to make her uncomfortable, when he suddenly hears her talk. “And what about teeth? I mean is not the sweetest love story ever told but-”

The boy chuckles, Y/N's curious eyes a few inches away. “Alex wrote that one after his first breakup, Reggie and I did the melody.”

“Good. Guess we’ll have to start making some experiences to help you write all that songs.” At that moment she finally pushes her lips against his, both in a moment of euphoria at the taste of each other. She presses her body against him and he bites lightly with his teeth on her lower lip to shove his tongue against her mouth in response. Her little hands pulling his hair hard as his hands go down her butt. Both of them enjoying what they had been dreaming of for so long.

When the two finally separate they fall in a comfortable silence, she starts to admire his facial features, delicately running her fingers through his nose, his mouth, his cheekbones, until he interrumpts her. “I knew you want me from the beginning, I could see the lust in your eyes. Everything about the choir was a complex plan to get me under you.” Luke affirms with his best poker face, and sees clearly how her eyes fill with light while a pure laugh escapes from her now swollen lips.

“And as always, I achieved the goal. The hot local rockstar is sleeping on my bed tonight.” No matter how hard he tries, he can never catch her off guard and he always ends up being the one blushing. She kisses him softly before getting up and taking the song lyrics back. “Luke, do you mind if I sing a bit of the song?”

“Of course not, it's yours. I will accompany you with the guitar, from the pre-choir?”

She nods and begins to sing the words he wrote for her. “Life is a risk but I will take it, close my eyes and jump. Together I think that we can make it, come on, let's run.”

She is reading the choir as she sings and the urge to cry reappears. He's basically telling her that she no longer has to go on living life alone, that she can lean on him, she can trust him to fight by her side. That it can be us instead of I.

“And rise through the night, you and I, we will fight to shine together. Bright forever.”

As soon as they finish singing Luke puts the guitar aside and goes over to wipe the tears from the girl's face. “I know that at first glance it doesn't seem like a love song, but..."

“But it is. It’s perfect, thank you Luke.” She didn't know that someone other than her could make her feel so special, but he proved her wrong, again.

The night before was like a dream. Y/N sleeping with his shirt while he wrapped her completely in his arms, singing softly in her ear and leaving little kisses on her neck every few verses until she fell asleep. At this point there is no way to deny how completely in love he is with her.

“Man, we need to talk.” His blonde friend wakes him up from his daydream and starts pulling him down the hall to an empty table in the cafeteria, where Reggie is already waiting for them.

They both sit down and Alex takes a deep breath as he plays with his fingers, trying to form coherent sentences with the words in his head. “Bobby called last night.” Luke's gaze instantly shifted to disgust, while Reggie looks quite shocked.

“So? What did he want?” Luke whispers, trying to sound disinterested.

“He sent some of our videos to an important person at Destiny Management and they are interested in the band. He said that if we comply with certain requests he will give the money for us to record the demo this Friday so that it’s ready for the appointment."

“And I guess you told him we don't need him or his money. What did he answer you? He cried?" the guitarist asks with an amused face, but his friends just look at each other.

“Don't you think we should think more about it? What happens if we don't win nationals? We’ll have lost something as sure as Bobby's deal for nothing."

“She’s my friend and I love her but I have to agree, Luke. As difficult as it is, our priority has to be Sunset Curve, not Spectacular"

“But-”

“They are right, Luke.” All three look at the girl, as pale as If they had seen a ghost. “Spectacular is my dream, And I know I'd do anything for it. It would be unfair of me to get angry because you’re fighting for yours. Don't hesitate, if anyone can find a way out of this it's me.”

“But, the duet...”

“I’ll just have to be the melody and the words. I’ll be fine, and honestly I'm so proud of you guys, I know you will be rock legends one day.” All three feel guilty but don't know what to say or do to make it right. She goes over to hug the drummer and the bassist who take her in their arms with all their strength, a “I’m so sorry” from the blonde accompanied by an “I know” from the girl can be heard. Then she stands in front of the guitarist and kisses his lips intensely, but breaking away painfully fast. The guys leave lovers alone for a moment of privacy.

“I believe in you, baby. You are destined to be a star, forget everything else, even me. Take the moment and knock them off their feet.” She kisses him lightly on the lips and walks a few steps back. “This month was the happiest of my life in a long time, thank you. Guess I’ll see you guys around.”

“Why do you sound like you are saying goodbye? And a horrible one? I thought you were good at everything.” Luke walks over to her again and places his hands on her cheeks, rubbing them gently. His voice is shaky and his eyes are glassy, she snorts at his sudden taunt, a little smile covered with the tears.

“Once everyone gets back to their own business, do you think you'll still have time for me? Alex is my damn neighbor, and we couldn't keep in touch.” And Luke gets it. She is used to being alone, to people not being permanent in her life. Neither her parents, nor her best friend, nor her boyfriend, nor anyone else has stayed. So this time to protect herself she decided that he too was going to leave, that it would be foolish to think that he of all possible people would stay.

“I‘m not letting you go baby, you're the only one I would let to boss me around.” The girl laughs when she remembers the millions of times she had to correct him and how he always ended up making her blush in some way, especially when they danced. She can't remember telling him but dancing with him has been the most special thing she has ever experienced. She danced with Damian for years and it never felt like the first time Luke put her long, strong hands on her waist and pulled her close to him. She can only hope to feel that way again one day.

“You are my one and only, firecracker. We’ll find a way, neither of us is a quitter.”

They say that actions are worth a thousand words, and Luke had definitely missed his first chance to show Y/N that he was serious about them by not getting in time to wish her good luck before she left with the group to the city of the competition, a few hours from there. He couldn't help but feel more miserable when he returned to the studio and found a small yellow sheet in his journal.

“You got this, rockstar. I have so much faith in you, so go make me proud. And I don’t want you feeling guilty, okay? I always want to see you shine, baby, no matter what. Your firecracker, Y/N.” Luke laughs softly, dazzled by her attempt to be sweet. If she trusts him so much, why doesn't he return the favor? She assured him they could win and when she says something, she follows through.

Why ruin his life with all of Bobby's ridiculous demands while ditching his girl in the process when he can go sing with her and do band things their way, without selling their soul to the devil. He sits on the couch thinking about what to say to the boys when they both rush in and pick him up, one from his feet and the other from his arms.

“What the hell are you two planning this time?” Luke sounds annoyed but does nothing to stop them from moving him, they throw him into the back of the car and he hits his head, getting him to kick them before they close the door.

"I'm not going to let her down again, I can’t."

"Yeah, and surely we can win, the number is spectacular... do you understand what I did there?”

Alex rolls his eyes and Luke smiles. They drive at full speed to Luke’s for him to take all his things and when he returns to the car, stands thoughtfully by the window.

“What are you doing?!” Alex is not having it, looks like a vein is going to burst from stress any second now.

“Do you think we’ll make it?” Questioned the guitarist, clearly nervous.

“If you stop asking stupid as fuck questions and get in the car, maybe.” Luke pouts but listens and finishes loading everything in the trunk.

The road is full of music to try to calm all the nerves, there was also plenty of time to rehearse the number over and over again, Luke analyzing in his mind every move he had to make, from time to time his bossy girl correcting him in his head. The only difficult thing was probably changing into the costumes, especially for Alex.

They arrive directly to register and the band turns pale when they hear the powerful and breathtaking voice of the singer who is playing her solo right now, a heavenly version of 'Never enough’. By the time they are ready to go, the main number has already started, the imposing woman in the very center of the stage with one of the boys of the group, who although does not have the voice of the guitarist, is making a good effort. Damian is on the other side, staring at her with a superiority smirk and Luke can't help but want to punch him.

“I never realized how anyone could make everything so right, I was so sad, you brought me back.” Alex quickly indicates to him how to enter the stage from the back, and Luke prepares to jump in time for the chorus, taking care of not being seen as he climbs the platform. The song is an old pop-rock song from the 80s, specifically chosen to make the guitarist's voice shine. He and his firecracker sat listening to music for hours until they finally found it, the girl's eyes shining with excitement as she imagined all she could do with the potential of the melody.

“You give me something to believe in, after all that we've been through.” He appears on the platform just in time, the lights and smoke coming out right in his grand entrance. Y/N turns immediately upon hearing her voice and he dances his way towards her.

“The love you give, it all comes back to you. You give me something to believe in, you can see the real me. And here with you is where I'm meant to be.” both singing together the remainder of the chorus and dancing to the beat. The biggest smile he has seen in his girl since he met her on her beautiful face. With that he feels satisfied with his decision, whatever happens, win or lose, it was worth it.

“And here we are together side by side, and nothing seems impossible tonight.” the duet between them is electrifying as always, he puts his hands on her thighs and lifts her with ease, both of them moving and enjoying themselves as if they were the only ones in the place. The dance ends as the first time they danced in the auditorium when he showed her that he was the right option, he holds her with one arm, their lips inches from touching but holding the magnetism back for a few more seconds until finally leave the stage.

As soon as they are backstage Y/N throws herself at Luke, wrapping her legs around his hips and devouring his lips with hers. “Someone missed me.” Luke whispers catching his breath.

"I can't believe you guys did this for me." Expressed the girl as she turns to see her other two friends, still wrapped around Luke who has her tightly held with his huge arms around her butt.

“We trust you as much as you trust us. We know that you will win, you worked like nobody for this moment.” Affirmed the blonde, giving her a small kiss on the forehead.

“I feel like I won already.” And she did. She won the trophy, the money for the demo, friends, and a ridiculously gorgeous rockstar who drove her crazy in more ways than one. All this years working hard were finally worth it... and Damian throwing a tantrum in the middle of the stage felt good too, not gonna lie.

“When are you going to ask me to be your boyfriend? As much as I love you more than anything, a man has to have some pride, you know? We've been together for like 5 months and I'm getting desperate.” They are both lying together on the girl's bed, their legs intertwined as he makes little circles with his fingers on his girl's stomach.

She raises her head resting her hand on his bare chest, her thoughts impossible to read. What are you talking about? I'm waiting for you to ask me!” He chuckles, prepared to tease her. “Bu-”she interrumpts him, pushing the hand that is resting on him to sit down. “Ba-”

“Wait a second, Lucas!” He bites his lip, he never liked being called by his name but for some reason it sounds incredibly sensual when she says it. “Yeah, baby?”

“D- did you say you love me?”

“I did, and I do. Everybody knows you've got me trapped in your claws.” He jokes to make her laugh, and he succeeds.

“I love you too, so much.”

“I know baby.” He winks teasingly at her. “Returning to the topic, you are the most bossy and confident person I have ever met, and you want to tell me that you were waiting for me to take the first step? Doesn’t sound like my firecracker. You literally pretended to be a sunset curve super fan to get my attention.”

"I totally did, I was awesome, first thing next day you were at the auditorium.” She says proud while Luke rolls his eyes with a smile. “But if it makes you feel better, I'm 100% a fan now, and...You are completely right, for once.”

She takes a deep breath, intertwining her fingers with his. “Lucas Patterson, I want you, if we're being honest, probably from the first time I saw you at that Sunset Curve gig we met at. You are annoying, cocky, passionate, and I love you with all my heart. Be my boyfriend... please.”

“There it is, that’s my girlfriend.” His eyes full of lust after hearing that she wanted him from the first night, he draws her closer to him to push his lips against hers, his girlfriend's tongue quickly dancing with his.

"Oh my god, we already talked about this, close the damn window, I don't want to hear it!” The blonde cries from his balcony, the couple can't help but laugh before joining their lips again.

Thank you for reading ✨

Taglist: @writerinlearning, @ghostofmgg @strangerthanfanfiction713 @thebloodthirstyvampress, @kinda-really-lost, @kcd15, @magnet-girl, @aliandthephantoms, @stxrkspidey, @pinkrockstar19, @s0uz4s, @shycupcakealissa @cookiebuba, @fangirlangioma, @sageellsworth05, @twist3dtinkerbell, @sunsetcurvenotsunsetswerve, @caitsymichelle13, @ifilwtmfc @luckylouiebug, @bibliophilewednesday, @totomoshi, @siennanoelle01, @lunashadow6955, @bookfrog247, @morganayennefertyrell, @kiss-themoongoodbye, @rachelle3musicals, @imsydneywalker, @really-dont-forget-it @agentstarkid @talksoprettyjjx @kaitieskidmore1 @lukeys-giggle @katie-navarro @crybabyddl @cocopuffs0211 @marvel-ousnesss @txrii @tuttigunner @dpaccione @justalittleweirdoo @mrstodorooki @averyharrypotterlife

#luke patterson imagine #luke patterson x reader #luke patterson x y/n #luke jatp #luke patterson #luke patterson fanfic #luke patterson fic #luke patterson oneshot #luke patterson imagines #jatp imagine #jatp fanfic #charlie gillespie imagines #jatp one shot #jatp luke #charlie gillespie x y/n #charlie gillespie fic #charlie gillespie x reader #charlie gillespie imagine

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fandomcelery · 3 years ago

Text

Feelings are complicated, aren't they?

Pairing: Santana Lopez/Brittany S. Pierce

Word Count: 2107

Rating: Teens and Up

Tags: Sexuality Crisis, Internalized Homophobia, Pining

Beta: @useless-fanfictions helped me out a lot on this fic, especially since I'm just starting out writing, so a big thanks to them!

Summary: Walking next to Brittany felt normal and right, but at that moment it felt slightly wrong. A bunch of questions were running through her mind. Was she acting differently? Was it obvious that something was off? Oh god, does everyone think that she’s gay?

Or, the one where Santana realizes she might have feelings for Brittany and panics over it.

Read it on Ao3

For the Glee Character "This-or-That" Challenge: @gleethisorthatchallenge

Prompt: Sharing a bed or Sexuality Crisis

The way Santana feels around Brittany is normal, right? Sure, she’s never felt it for any other person—not even any of her previous boyfriends—but it’s a completely normal feeling. And yeah, okay, she also defends Brittany all the time when people insult or make fun of her, and when Brittany sticks up for her and is always by her side, she can never stop smiling. She always feels warm whenever she compliments her about literally anything that she’s wearing, or how her hair looks that day, or really anything that makes Santana feel pretty.

There’s also the fact that they have sex regularly even though they’re in relationships with guys who would willingly have sex with them as well, but that’s different. It must be different, because if it’s not—

No, it’s not an option for it to not be anything but platonic. It’s got to be, it just has to be.

Even though Santana hates when people flirt with Brittany and will usually try to scare them off when others aren’t looking. Or when they get into fights or arguments, big or small, she feels like shit when she can’t talk to Brittany, and then that means they can’t have their sweet lady kisses that make Santana feel like they are the only two people left on the entire planet.

Feelings are complicated, aren’t they?

As long as she always stands her ground, keeping their relationship just friends, and convincing Brittany—and a little bit of herself—that even though they’re in relationships they can have sex and it’s not cheating because they’re both girls, she will be fine. She just has to keep telling herself that their relationship isn’t anything, that they’re strictly friends and that she doesn’t have feelings for her best friend, because if she did then she wouldn’t know what she would do with herself.

She’s not homophobic, and just because Kurt freaking Hummel struts around with his gay flag waving in the air doesn’t mean that everyone can or has to. And even if they do, they’ll get bullied and harassed, just like him. It’s the way that everything goes, the straight popular kids are on top, and the gays are at the bottom, even though that’s ridiculous, it’s the way it goes.

She’ll just keep it to herself—even though there’s nothing there, obviously—and everything will be fine. She hopes that if she keeps telling herself that then maybe it will be.

***

Of course, that’s not what happens. The following Monday, after the weekend Santana had realized that something is different, it seemed like everyone has been staring at the two of them differently, but it might just be her paranoia talking.

Walking next to Brittany felt normal and right, but at that moment it felt slightly wrong. A bunch of questions were running through her mind. Was she acting differently? Was it obvious that something was off? Oh god, does everyone think that she’s gay? She is suddenly on the defensive side, glaring at the people who she thought were looking at her and Brittany weirdly. Maybe people always looked at them this way and neither of them ever noticed or cared; except now she did.

She knows the route they take to get to their next classes by heart because they always walk together, even though their schedules don’t really line up. Most people think that all the Cheerios just walk to class together in groups because the outfits look good together—which they do, she thinks conceitedly—and because of the cheerleading cliques. For a while that’s why Quinn, Brittany, and Santana would walk together, but then they actually got kind of close because of Glee Club, and now Quinn walks with Finn to her classes and Santana walks with Brittany.

During her fourth period that she has alone she can’t stop thinking about Brittany. How when she walks to class she hugs her binder to her chest, or how during class she always fidgets with her pencil when she’s in between writing, or how even if she doesn’t care about what people are talking about, she’ll listen to them anyway (like this one time a few days ago when they had arrived early to glee club and Rachel had come up to Brittany and her to ask for dance lessons, going on and on about something that had to do with her being a star and needing to know how to dance better, and Santana had only been paying attention to Brittany and ignored Rachel’s harping), Santana admires the way Brittany exists, and how it seems like nothing really bothers her. She doesn’t know why all of the sudden it’s hitting her, especially since she’s been friends with her for so long, and no, she doesn’t have feelings for her, they’re just friends.

***

They walk to their usual seats during lunch together, every now and again bumping shoulders with how close they are while they’re talking. Santana sits down across from Brittany, as she doesn’t miss a beat from what she’s saying to sit down.

“And I swear that Lord Tubbington has a gambling addiction, but he won’t stop—” she takes a bite of her food, “—and I don’t know what to do.”

“Why don’t you just take away his laptop privileges?” Santana suggests, also taking a bite of her own food. It’s not bad, however, it’s not good. Then again, it’s the school’s food. When she looks up at Brittany, she looks quizzical, like she hasn’t thought of doing that.

“That probably would work,” Brittany responds, and continues eating.

Santana’s focused on something else. That something else is Brittany’s physical appearance, everything about her: to her flashing smile, to her thin and perfect eyebrows. her slim waist, long legs, and her torso—which she shouldn’t be staring at in the middle of school, and yet she is. She is stunning to Santana, with her lean appearance and bright golden colored hair pulled perfectly back into a ponytail. Her blue eyes seem to twinkle all the time.

“Santana?” Brittany asks after she’s been staring for a moment or two.

“Huh, what? Sorry, I was just, thinking,” she responds quickly and looks away to other tables where other kids are sitting, she lets go of her lip that she must have been biting on.

“About what?” Brittany takes another bite of her food, almost finished, whereas Santana has barely touched hers.

“Nothing important,” she mumbles, taking a drink from her water bottle. The answer seems to satisfy Brittany and they go back to normal and easy conversation like Santana hadn’t been just staring at her best friend’s boobs.

***

Glee Club isn’t that different. Rachel and Mercedes are fighting for a solo that Mr. Schue handed out, he doesn’t know how to handle it, and so they’re trying to argue over one another. Finn, Puck, Matt, and Mike are making bets about something in football. Kurt, Tina, and Artie are talking about something—she can’t hear their conversation, and honestly doesn’t care—and so it’s Quinn, Brittany and her talking about the Cheerios like they always are.

“Sue’s been on our asses about winning at Nationals,” Quinn comments as she sits down next to Brittany.

“She’s just concerned about staying on top,” Santana remarks, looking around the choir room. She looks up at the two who are arguing over one another and laughs a little bit. Everyone knows that Rachel’s going to get the solo, she usually does. Mercedes probably knows that, too, and yet she’s still going to fight for it.

“And her paycheck,” Quinn adds.

Eventually Mr. Schue stood in front of the class, apparently they had sorted it out where Rachel got this solo and Mercedes would get the next one.

This Glee practice they were going to focus on their choreography added with singing, and it wasn’t that big of an issue for the three cheerleaders (and it was mostly for the jocks to practice anyway, since they were the ones having problems, other than Mike, surprisingly).

Afterwards everyone was tired and sore, they had to start over a bunch of times because someone kept messing up (Finn). Slowly the choir room emptied, and Brittany and Santana walked to their next class together. They were going to walk with Quinn, but she had muttered something about a “troll trying to steal her boyfriend” and went off to walk with Finn. They separated at their different classrooms, and the three of them were going to meet up for Cheerios practice that was after school, which was their usual plan.

***

After practice Santana was even more exhausted than when she left Glee rehearsal. She grabs her water bottle that she had placed in her locker when she first got there. She gulps down a quarter of the bottle before putting it back.

There are many girls around her, yet the only one she’s focused on is Brittany.

Ever since they walked into the locker room, Brittany, and another cheerleader—Hailey was her name—were talking nonstop to one another. It’s not like Santana was eavesdropping, but it’s not her fault they were standing so close and speaking so God damn loudly.

“One time she made a girl cry just because she talked back,” Hailey continues while she brushes her hair in the mirror.

“I know, I was there,” Brittany responds, leaning up against the lockers next to Hailey’s that no one’s using. “Sue can be a bitch sometimes.”

Hailey wraps her hair in a ponytail and starts to put the hair tie around it. “Don’t let her hear you say that she might move you down the pyramid,” she jokes, which gets a laugh out of Brittany. “However, she is the best cheerleading coach McKinley can offer, so I guess we’ll have to put up with it,” Hailey states.

They all know that that’s true, no other teacher will coach the Cheerios, and she’s the only one that’s gotten them to Nationals and gets a pretty big paycheck put towards the cheerleading team.

And listen, Santana doesn’t do jealous, okay? And she’s not. She just doesn’t like Brittany hanging out with another person so closely. And it’s because no one understands her like Santana does is all. And sure, Brittany has other friends, but usually they go through Santana to talk to her, so she knows them, or they’re all in the conversation. This is an entire new person, and they’re jokingtogether, which Brittany can do on her own, of course, but-

“Stop pining and either go talk with them or leave already,” Quinn mutters behind her.

Santana whips around and glares at her, and Quinn smirks.

“Oh, come on, don’t think I didn’t notice.” She walks past Santana to get to her locker, and Santana decides to do what Quinn suggested.

She grabs her water bottle from her locker and makes sure all of her things are put away before she leaves to head home.

***

She can’t be in love with her best friend, right? Sure, she and Brittany are close, and they do practically everything together, and Santana loves everything about Brittany, but that doesn’t mean she’s in love with Brittany.

Those thoughts are how Santana finds herself pacing in her room, not for the first time in the last few days, lost in thought. She looks over at the photos that she has on her walls of all of the Cheerios, but there are a few of either her, Brittany, and Quinn, or just the two of them.

She walks over and picks one up to look at it. She gets the same feeling that she’s been getting every time she thinks about Brittany, yet she’s been ignoring it for a while now. Except this time, she doesn’t. She feels butterflies in her stomach and doesn’t even realize she is smiling at Brittany’s picture. She sets down the photo when she does catch herself, and goes to lay down on her bed.

Even if she was gay, how would she know? Would having feelings that aren’t actually feelings enough to be considered gay? And what would everyone else think? Maybe she should turn to the internet, she thinks. She sits up and grabs her laptop that she keeps on her bedside table and loads it up.

A few searches later she realizes that maybe terms like bisexual or even lesbian fit her. Some more questions pop up in her head after that realization, but at least one thing’s certain.

Santana is in love with her best friend, and she has no idea what she’s going to do about it.

#gleecharactertot2021 #gleetotchallenge2021 #glee #santana lopez #brittany pierce #brittana #sexuality crisis #elliry writes #uefnajnfvedhbfhrsyuhebgveahj

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memeadonna · 4 years ago

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Playing with your Heart

Hello all! This story was inspired by a conversation @fox-knives and @malicealieness had with me about Sero pining after a Y/n who was already in a relationship. Because I am a classical musician by trade, this happened! It was a lot of fun to write and talk about, and I really hope you enjoy!

Sero Hanta has been in love with you since you first met, but you’ve already got a boyfriend. When tensions rise between you and your beloved, he has to play the supportive friend and be there for you - right? So why does he want more?

Warnings: NSFW content, recreational drug use

Here are the links to the pieces of music referenced in the story:

Voi Che Sapete

Als Luise die Briefe

Merry Go Round of Life

When people thought of classical musicians, they most often thought of someone posh and straight-laced, someone snobby with way too much time on their hands who won’t listen to a piece unless the composer was long dead. Sero had learned from experience that this was very far from the truth. He was an anomaly himself – a piano prodigy who took up percussion one day because he was bored, and had been accepted on a full ride to UA – one of the top university music programs in the world. He also gave off the aura of someone laid-back and lazy without a care in the world, and he did smoke a lot of weed. Like a lot of weed. Regardless of that, he was well-liked and well respected among his peers. He had a lot of friends who played a variety of instruments and genres, (and from people in the teaching and music therapy specializations too), and nobody ever treated him as less than once they realized he was a massive dork.

Unlike most universities, UA boasted a mix of genres its students could study. There were classical musicians, jazz musicians, pop, rock, singer-songwriter… you could find just about everything here. And among all of that, Sero had found you.

You were a classical singer with stars in your eyes the first time you had met him, and as you had excitedly introduced yourself and asked him if he was the same Sero Hanta you had seen perform a few years ago, adoration hit him hard in the chest. The way you smiled at him made him want to pick you up and kiss you, and when you spoke about music – about his music – with such joy in your eyes…

He fell hard and he fell fast. You were a classical singer, so while he went to orchestra, you went to choir. You always smiled and waved at him in the halls, and helped one another with your theory homework. Every day he fell a little more in love with you, and every day the two of you got closer and closer.

The only problem was that you had a boyfriend. A boyfriend who happened to be one of Sero’s best friends, and biggest rivals. Bakugou Katsuki was one of the most talented musicians Sero had ever met. He had perfect pitch, and could make absolutely any instrument sing. He didn’t play the piano (or anything with a keyboard), but he played just about everything else. Violin, cello, trumpet, clarinet, piccolo, bass, percussion… people called him the one-man orchestra. He could play more instruments than Jirou Kiyoka, who was one of the university’s best and brightest.

Bakugou wanted desperately to be a conductor, and that’s how he had met you. The two of you were taking the same elective conducting course, and had agreed to practice together. One thing had led to another, and the two of you had been going steady for a while now. Sero loved seeing you happy, but god if it didn’t make him so fucking jealous that it was with another man. What he wouldn’t give to be the one you looked at that way.

He noticed you seemed less happy about six months into your relationship with Bakugou. You and Sero had finished your counterpoint assignments together before one of your classes, and after conducting your smile seemed a little more forced. You didn’t give Sero a hug like you normally would, and as you paused outside of the percussion studio’s door clutching an art song book you looked sort of… lost. He had been practicing his marimba when you had shown up, and he had stopped to smile over at you.

“What’s wrong, Cherubino?” he asked sweetly. He called you that because the first thing he’d ever heard you perform was Voi Che Sapete, and he couldn’t get that performance out of his head. Hearing you asking someone to tell you if the feelings that overwhelmed you were love made him want to pull you off of the stage and into his arms while he kissed you senseless.

He also liked that it meant cherub, but the real reason was that he kept slipping up and trying to call you “Cariño”, but it was easy to change that into “Cherubino”, even though they didn’t sound remotely similar.

“Well,” you blushed and began to fiddle with your hair. God, he wanted to braid it or stick his nose in it while he hugged you. Your shampoo always smelled so good, like marigolds on a sunny day. “The spring showcase is coming up.” You started. He knew about that, of course, it was one of the biggest events of the year for UA University. The crowd was typically at least three thousand strong, and only the best and brightest got to perform. “You know how someone from our conducting class was going to be given the opportunity to conduct the orchestra for one of the pieces?” oh, he knew how much you wanted to do that. As he was about to comfort you for not getting the part, you cut him off. “They chose me.”

“That’s wonderful!” before he could stop himself, he was hoisting you into his arms and spinning you around. He set you down, and noticed that you looked anything but happy. “Cherubino?”

“Katsuki’s mad at me,” you replied, fidgeting a bit. “I knew how much he wanted it. He told me I only got the position because they want him to play the violin solo, and I can’t even get mad at him because he’s right.”

Sero started to curse the blond boy out in Spanish. “How could he say something like that to you?” Sero grit his teeth. “It is not true. He’s just mad that you’re better than him.”

You looked away like you didn’t believe him, and Sero felt the overwhelming urge to sock Bakugou across the face. You forced a smile. “They also asked me to sing at the showcase. Guess what I’m going to be singing?”

“Hmmmm,” he calmed instantly at your seemingly lighter mood, rubbing his chin like he hadn’t already read the email that had gone out. “Voi che sapete?” He asked coyly.

“Certo!” you nodded as you grinned at him, and if you were his he would be kissing you stupid right now. “Do you want to get lunch? Bakugou went off to go talk with Kirishima and apparently, he doesn’t want to be seen with both a viola player and his girlfriend. One’s bad enough.”

“It would be an honour to take you to lunch, mi media naranja,” he packed up his mallets and you hummed Als Luise die Briefe. It was a short piece about a scorned woman burning her lover’s letters, and cursing the fact that her love for him would still burn within her.

“I’ve played that before,” he told you, smiling over at you. “On the piano. Maybe we could jam out sometime.”

Your eyes lit up. “Yeah, sounds like fun!” you beamed at him. “I’d love to. I’ll get us a practice room. Do you have the sheet music?”

“Oi!” you jumped as you heard Bakugou call your name from across the hall. “Let’s go get lunch like you wanted.” He looked between you and Sero, his frown never changing. “We’ve got something to celebrate, don’t we?”

You broke out into a cheery smile. “I asked Sero if he wanted to come with us,” you answered, tugging him out of the percussion room and into the hall with you. “Because I didn’t think you were still going to want to go for lunch since you ran off with Kirishima.”

Bakugou looked between you and Sero. “He’s coming on a date?” he asked skeptically.

“Ah, right,” you smiled over at Sero. “Sorry. Rain check?”

“Rain check,” he agreed. “Have fun, Cherubino.” He waved at you and you trotted back into Bakugou’s arms. He placed a kiss on your lips as the two of you interlocked your fingers. His heart twisted as you looked over at Bakugou with such adoration. Bakugou, however, wasn’t looking at you. He was staring directly at Sero.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You beat out a 4/4 pattern while Sero watched you intently, the metronome in his head ticking the time exactly. You beckoned with your free hand, painting music only you could hear with your fingers, using ten paintbrushes at once to carve out a masterpiece.

You came to the end of the piece and held the final note in your palm. You kept the energy in the room captive for a few moments longer, and when you released it, Sero smiled at you. “Perfectly on time,” he smiled. “I don’t know why you’re so nervous about it.”

You looked up at him. “Just that Katsuki keeps criticizing me whenever I try to practice and he catches me,” you smiled softly. “I get he’s trying to help but it really does the opposite. We start rehearsals with the orchestra soon, and I don’t want to look stupid in front of everyone.”

Sero frowned. “Well, you won’t look stupid at all, Cherubino,” he smiled. “You’ll look graceful and beautiful, and you’ll shape your music so exquisitely.”

You smiled softly at him. “Thanks, Sero,” you smiled.

A few days later, after your first orchestra rehearsal, you slunk back into the percussion room looking absolutely defeated. He had been practicing with his newest kalimba, playing something from a Ghibli movie. You had walked in and he had immediately swept you into a hug.

“What’s wrong, mi media naranja?” he had asked, but he had a feeling he knew the answer as you held him tightly.

You looked up and smiled bravely. “It’s okay,” you answered. “I just – Katsuki was being – he screamed at me during rehearsal and called me incompetent.”

He pulled you into another hug, eyes blazing with fire. He had turned down the ability to be a part of this piece’s performance – he had wanted to see it – but he knew he just had to be. He would swap with someone just for you, so he could be there to support you.

“What is with you always running to him?” You jumped as your boyfriend stood in the doorway. “Own up to it – you came unprepared. You were being incompetent. Grow up and accept it. Do better next time.”

“Hey,” Sero snapped. “As an orchestra player you’re supposed to listen to what she does. You’re not supposed to question the conductor.”

“Shut up, I wasn’t talking to you,” he glared at you. “Show some backbone. Are you really going to let this third-rate-”

“Katsuki,” you snapped. “Leave Sero out of this. You are in the wrong, not me. And you had better apologize.”

“There’s that fire I love,” he pulled you out of Sero’s arms and into his own. “But you’re a damned fool if you think that conducting was anything but half-assed. I’m saying this because I want it to be good, baby. I’m your concertmaster, not to mention your featured soloist, so you should listen to me.”

“No, you should listen to me. Do not yell at me during rehearsal again,” you snapped back, bristling as you brushed past him, minding the violin case as you passed.

Sero was there at every rehearsal. He watched you conduct, watched you command authority from the podium, and shape the music as Bakugou soloed on the violin. Bakugou seemed to be playing within the lines, and jabbered at you to do it his way whenever he could. After every rehearsal you looked tired and defeated, and Sero usually took you to get boba while Kirishima lectured Bakugou about proper rehearsal etiquette. This happened every day for the two weeks leading up to the concert, until the night of the dress rehearsal he snapped. You had already run through your rehearsal of Voi Che Sapete, and Sero could not have been prouder as you sauntered off the stage. God, he loved you. Even watching you from the back of the orchestra, he was blown away from your stage presence. The sweater you wore laced up at the back with a bow resting at the swell of your ass. He might have been staring at it for a little too long, but he didn’t mind having an extra mallet.

As you stepped up to the podium, he admired the way your ripped jeans hugged your figure, and then how you adjusted yourself. You raised your hands, took a breath, and began to conduct. Bakugou stood up from his chair for his solo, and started out a bar early. He kept going, glaring defiantly at you as you continued the piece. Some of the musicians caught up with Bakugou, others stayed with you. You cut the orchestra off. “Let’s start again from bar-”

“If you’re going to cue me wrong,” Bakugou hissed. “You shouldn’t even be on that podium.”

You looked back at him coldly. “I hadn’t cued you yet, Katsuki. If the concert were not tomorrow, I would have hired another soloist. If this were a professional concert, you would have been fired by now,”

“Oh really?” He snapped. “Well, if this were a professional concert, then they wouldn’t have hired a pathetic amateur like you! And you know what, fuck you! We’re done. If you can’t keep our relationship out of this, I don’t want a relationship anymore.” He packed up his violin and left. “I’ll see you all tomorrow at the concert.”

You remained composed, but Sero knew you well enough that he could read the emotions boiling within you like a book. You cleared your throat. “Alright. I would like to go over bars-”

Your composure broke as soon as you and Sero were back at his place. You had planned on spending the night at your boyfriend’s, and he was supposed to be your lift, so you were stranded on campus. At least you had your concert clothes and makeup bag, and of course your best friend here to comfort you. You sobbed into your hands, body shaking as Sero watched you ugly crying. A pizza with your favourite toppings and a bubble tea sat untouched in front of you as he rubbed your back. How were you so beautiful even wailing in anguish and huffing with sobs that shook your whole body?

You threw your arms around him and sobbed into his shoulder as he got close enough, holding him tightly as he stroked your hair. “It’s okay, mi media naranja,” he spoke softly into your hair, savouring the smell of marigolds once more. “Let it out. I’m here.”

He hummed softly to you as you slowly began to stop crying, and then you were just lying pliant in his arms, fingers playing with the beaded necklace he had worn today. “Hey,” he spoke. “Can I get you anything? Water? Doritos? Craigslist ad for a hitman?”

You laughed at that. “Edibles?” you replied.

He hesitated. You had never done any drugs with him before (or at all, as far as he knew), so seeing you blinking up at him asking for his weed he was ashamed to admit he was sort of turned on and excited that you wanted to share some with him. Mostly excited. Yeah.

“Pick something that’ll wear off by morning. I don’t want to do the concert high,” you told him.

He went to his stash of candy and retrieved some of his gummies. He picked out a package of lemon ginger and blueberry acai gummies and walked back over to you. He handed you both packets while he went back to the kitchen to get some beer for you, and when he came back you had eaten one gummy out of each packet.

“¡Pucha! You’re only supposed to have one the first time and see how you feel,” he sat beside you. “Eat some food and we’ll watch a movie.”

You reached for a slice of pizza and cuddled up into him. He put an arm around you as he popped his own gummies, and the two of you ate pizza. “What did I do to deserve such a shitty man?” you sighed. “I – I just don’t know anymore.” You snuggled into his chest, finishing the crust of your pizza and sipping on your boba. You looked up at him, fresh tears brimming your eyes. You wiped at them harshly as you set your drink back down “I’m lucky to have you, Sero. I really am.”

He leaned down and before he could stop himself he was kissing you, one hand coming up to cup your face in his palm. You didn’t pull away, and when he did you were staring at him with wide eyes.

“I shouldn’t have done that,” he mentally cursed himself out as you processed the kiss. “I’m sorry mi media naranja. I just-” you reached up and kissed him back, soft and timid and sweet. You tasted like pizza and brown sugar and as he pulled you into his lap everything in the world made sense to him. Your kisses grew more and more desperate, and he responded in kind, running his hands along your thighs as he helped you straddle him, your fingers dipping under the black fabric of his hoodie.

This was so wrong. You were holding his hands now, and each zinging kiss sent electric shocks zooming through his body. This was wrong – you were still grieving your relationship for Christ’s sake – but as you wrapped your arms around him and pulled away just the slightest bit – enough so you were panting against him and he could see your kiss-swollen lips – he was addicted. For him, there was just no going back.

You kept kissing him as you squirmed in his lap, and he wanted to pull away and tell you that if you kept that up, he wasn’t going to be able to hold himself back. As you finally chucked off your pants and underwear, he realized you had absolutely no intention of holding back. No intention of stopping. Your hands found his belt as you went back to kissing him, and he squeezed your ass with one hand while his fingers toyed with your slit. He felt a burst of pride as he felt how wet you were, and as you fished his cock out you spent only a few moments stroking it before you were guiding it inside of you.

He hissed at the sensation, shivering as you wrapped your arms around him and tugged on his hair. You began to move your hips, sighing against him as he deepened your kisses. He hadn’t wanted this to be your first time. He’d always imagined wining and dining you, sweeping you off of your feet and carrying you to bed where he would ravish you completely, but as you mouthed at his neck and held him tightly, nothing had ever felt more perfect.

“God, who could ever stand to lose you?” he asked out loud, running his fingers through your hair. “I think I’d die of sadness.”

He kissed you as you tried to respond, not sure he could stomach a rejection yet. You continued to ride him, still slow and unhurried as you just enjoyed his warmth. The intimacy. He held you like you were all that was precious to him, and as you began to slowly speed up, you felt him bucking into you. He kissed you again to stop himself from saying he loved you out loud, relishing the feeling of your fingers sneaking under his hoodie and shirt to trace along the lines of his body.

Your heavy breathing and quiet noises filled his senses, along with the sweet smell of marigolds and the feeling of euphoria your every touch brought him. “H-Hanta,” you spoke breathlessly against his lips, and his heart skipped a beat. You wrapped your arms around him once again, this time with your skin against his skin. “Hanta please.” You looked up at him with pleading eyes and he pulled you into another kiss, one hand finding your clit while the other sat on your hip, helping you ride him.

Your phone started to ring then, and the two of you ignored it as you lost yourselves. The edibles were kicking in now, leaving everything hazy and distant and a little foggy as you tangled your tongue with his. “Feels so good,” you whined a tiny bit as you said that, and the breathy need in your voice made sparks dance around his abdomen. The phone rang again, and he ignored it still as he trailed the arm up away from your hip and pulled your body flush to his. Chest to chest, he continued to play with you and hold you close and listen to your little sounds.

He let a few of his own slip as he enjoyed you, and if he had had any less composure he would have been drooling. He braced your legs against his body and clumsily rolled the two of you over so he was between your legs now, and you were under him. You pulled your arms out of his hoodie to brace yourself, but after a moment your arms and legs were wrapped around him and he was in absolute heaven. He started mumbling to you in Spanish, confessing every little dirty thing he wanted to do to you. He told you that you were beautiful and talented and that he loved you. He told you that Bakugou was the world’s biggest idiot. He also told you nasty words about how perfectly your cunt squeezed him, and as you tugged his hair he almost wondered if you understood.

“I’m gonna cum soon,” he mumbled. “Are you close?”

You nodded, locking your ankles behind his back as you once more pulled him into a kiss. That message was clear enough, he thought as he returned a hand to your clit, the other bracing himself against the couch as he held back his orgasm with everything he had.

“Mi media naranja,” he cooed, kissing you between his words. “My better half. My other half. My-” he lost his words as he watched you fall apart for him, rendered speechless by the heart-stopping moans you were letting out – so quiet but so filled with passion – and the faces you were making as your back arched and you began to throb around him. A few more strokes and he was joining you in bliss, the feeling warm and tingly as it spread throughout his body. He struggled to breathe for a few seconds as you pulled him into another kiss, deep and desperate and perfect. He lay on you for a few moments, basking in the afterglow as he rested his forehead against yours and breathed against you, giving you the occasional kisses.

Post nut clarity began to settle in as he pulled himself out of you, but as you shyly smiled up at him, he wrapped you in his arms and gave you another kiss. The phone rang a third time, and this time both of you saw the caller ID.

Of course it was him. Bakugou knew just how to ruin the moment.

Sero pressed decline as you stood and stretched, the muscles in your shoulders tense and his spunk sliding down your thighs. He had to physically restrain himself from scooping you up and carrying you to bed (and only partially because he didn’t have nearly the balance he did when he was sober). “I’m gonna have a shower,” you said awkwardly, pointing.

“Okay,” he agreed.

“Then can we cuddle?” you looked so shy as you asked that, wringing your hands. “I feel safe when I’m in your arms.”

His heart was about to win the gold medal for freestyle gymnastics if you kept that cute look on your face. He broke out into one of his trademark grins. “Mind if I join you?” he asked coyly.

You held out your hand to him, and he stood up as he accepted it. He gave you a lingering kiss you leaned into, and then tried to lead you to the bathroom, but as his pants fell down, he turned and faceplanted. Your laugh had never sounded so sweet before.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You and Sero arrived about an hour before the concert started. You were dressed in a set of tails with your makeup done (he had watched you do it in amazement, and had just about asked you to do eyeliner on him), and as you got adjusted and warmed up (both vocally and physically), he was once again mesmerised.

You chatted with some of the other classical singers as you waited for the orchestra to arrive, and as Sero left to go warm up he found himself so incredibly reluctant to do so. He had woken up with you in his arms, and if he had to go a day without that ever again, he was sure he was going to die.

Bakugou arrived his usual thirty minutes before the concert, and you ignored him as you and the main conductor went over notes from the previous rehearsal. The hotheaded blond sauntered up to you and waited to be noticed, and he only grew more and more irritated as you ignored him. The conductor left you alone and you finally turned to face Bakugou.

“Hey,” he spoke gruffly. “You didn’t answer any of my calls.”

“I didn’t have a reason to,” you replied, calm and collected.

“I’m sorry,” he sighed. “Look, you were right. I’ve been an asshole. I’ve been in the wrong, and I’m sorry. Now come here and give me a hug.” He opened his arms for you.

“No,” you answered flatly.

“What do you mean no?” Bakugou snapped.

“As for your solo, you will play it the way I want you to. I am the conductor. As for our relationship, you made it clear we no longer have one, which based on the way that you’ve been acting lately sounds like the best option to me,” you answered. “Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’ve got a show to conduct.”

“That’s it?” Bakugou hissed. “You’re just going to walk away from us like that?”

“You were the one who walked away,” you smiled over at him. “But that doesn’t matter anymore. Like you said, if you can’t keep our relationship out of this, I don’t want a relationship at all.” You looked so damned powerful in your tails as you faced the blond down. Did he even know those were his own words? “Break a leg, Bakugou.” Sero felt his heart swell with pride.

The concert started and Sero was absolutely transfixed as you stepped up to the podium. You commanded such authority in front of the crowd, deadly calm and ready to emote. It was no small wonder why you had been chosen to conduct this piece – a switch had been flipped in you, and you carried yourself like a conductor.

Bakugou waited patiently for his cue. When you made eye contact and gave it to him you didn’t linger. He played the solo exactly the way you wanted it, fingers dancing across his fret board and managing to make the piece almost melancholy. You played with that emotion, bringing out certain sections to highlight Bakugou’s playing. Sero was under your spell as he watched you move, and he smiled as he realized this was where you belonged. You were in your element without a doubt, and he was so, so proud of you.

As the piece finished you once more held all of the energy in the room within yourself, and only once you relaxed did thunderous applause fill the hall. You took your bow with a smile, and if Sero didn’t have to play the next piece he would have chased you down backstage and kissed you stupid.

Despite loving the music, he couldn’t wait to be done. Just a few mote pieces until the concert ended, and next up was you. Your character was totally different as you stepped out, no longer that powerful conductor he had seen before. Now you were Cherubino, the young man curious about love. The music swelled as you described the sensations flowing through you, and Sero wanted to call out “Yes!” as you asked if they were love.

You finished the piece with a smile, and the crowd once more erupted into applause.

Now Sero definitely needed to find you backstage. You took your bow and made your exit, and the next time he saw you, you were receiving flowers as a thank you for being a soloist. Bakugou held his own bouquet awkwardly in one arm, his violin in the other hand, but Sero could not have cared less about him as he abandoned his mallets to meet you backstage. “You were amazing, Cariño!” he declared, picking you up and spinning you around. He set you down and the two of you hugged.

“You weren’t so bad yourself,” you smiled at him and pulled away. Bakugou glared at him over your shoulder, and he grinned as he flipped the blond off behind your back. “So, are you hungry?” you asked sweetly, and the sweet scent of marigolds surrounded him once more. Your bouquet was made up of them, and when you got home he was going to insist you press them. You leaned in close and whispered “We can skip out on the cast party and go right to bed if you want.”

Sero had to physically stop himself from proposing on the spot.

#sero hanta x reader #sero hanta #bakugou x reader #bakugou katsuki #violinist bakugou #bnha #mha #breakup #drug use #sero smut #memeadonna

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nnon-but-cwnancydrew · 3 years ago

Note

Tell me about the 5 things that make you happy and then ask the same thing to at least 10 people who have reblogged your posts before!

Thank you for the ask!

Alright here we go (in no particular order)

1) FAMILY MOVIE NIGHT! My mom is pretty much always busy with her job and my sister is always chasing the latest c-dramas so when we have the time to sit down and watch a movie without any outside distractions? Best feeling ever. (Also I don't trust them and always confiscate their phones.)

Close second and it's related to family so I'll just put it here. On most Saturdays my mother's younger brother and his family will come back for dinner and I always love interacting with my cousins. Especially my younger cousin brother! He's 9 and a total Rockhead he always used to bang his head against the rest of ours and giggle himself mad while we groan in pain. My sister and my cousin sister are closer both in age and relationship and it's always so funny to see them interacting bc they're the personification of this image:

(I don't watch The Simpsons btw so if this image has an underlying meaning I don't know it)

2) Validation. This comes in many forms. When I cook dinner on Sundays, when I fix a problem for my technological stumped older relatives or even a single like and reblog from Tumblr users. Ma'am your asks literally made my day I don't usually get asks

3) Singing! Music in general honestly. I hear a new song that I like and my soul is healed for that brief moment in time. Some of my earliest memories involve music. And my father. My father loved music. He taught me how to ride a bike with the Beatles' Let it Be playing in the background. We celebrated my first birthday at a hotel and the live band sang Happy Birthday to me. My mom still has the video and photos.

I'm in a choir and my teacher always chooses amazing SATB pieces. And while I might groan and moan over learning those old songs (mostly cus I don't learn any musical instruments and thus have the best worst knowledge of key signatures a person whose been learning scores since she was 10 could possibly have), those end results are always amazing and I never miss a performance if I can help it.

Side note I joined my current choir company bc my school choir kicked me out for being too hyperactive. Thanks guys

However, the silver lining is that I've made so many friends for life and I know for a fact that my current choir has offered me so much more than my school choir possibly could. For example, I've never flown in an airplane until we went to Hong Kong to compete in its International Music Competition (we won gold btw) and I've been to Kuching to perform for a weekend music festival.

Ahem. I got sidetracked

4) Books! Been escaping reality via those funky words engraved on dead trees circa 2009 baby! (Literally still remember the first novel I read. The Mystery of the Disappearing Cat by Enid Blyton. I didn't read the first book of the series until I was 15 bc the Mystery of the Disappearing Cat was my mom's and she had every single book in the series except for the first one.)

5) Creating in general. Mayhem. Confusion. Dinner. Sometimes I switch things up and stir all 3 together and serve them in a pot.

Okay seriously I love putting things together. IKEA furniture. Powerpoints. Meals. Puzzles. Young me would tire of the same old picture and put the puzzle together backward, with the picture lying on the table surface and a blank slate for me to piece together. (I think that's partly why you'll hardly see me write a fic here. I'm more for analyzing the details than anything.)

Probably gonna pursue a career in interior designing but I also said that about singing, a theatre career, and who knows what else so we'll see

Tagging: @voidsteffy @platanchorsociety @acenancy @the-magnificunt @bess-turani-marvin @sargentsblu @acehardy @naancypants @nancydrew428 @naceistruelove

(I really hope I didn't tag someone's main blog and side blog)

#thanks for the ask!#answered #me #not nancy drew related

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kurts-still-here · 3 years ago

Text

They Can See Right Through Me Glee TOT Challenge FanFiction

@celery-elliry @useless-fanfictions @gleethisorthatchallenge

Hi everyone, this is my third fic for the Glee TOT Challenge and the prompt I choose was “Have you been taking take of yourself?” because it was perfect for angst and I love angst. Hope everyone enjoys and tells me what they thought of it etheir on here, A03 OR FanFiction.Net. Happy reading 🤗🤗😁😁

Archive Of Our Own

FanFiction.Net

The first time the Warblers had seen Kurt was in the dining hall during lunch. They had heard rumors all that week about a new transfer student and were dying to know who it was. Not that they were gossipy or anything but maybe this kid could be another member to their show choir group. They were always looking for new members, they just had to be good enough to get in.

They had been sitting at the designated lunch table for all the Warblers when Sebastian had walked over to them, hand in hand with another boy that they had never seen before. The first thing the group noticed was how cute the boy was. He was very good looking with pale, smooth skin, blue eyes and perfectly styled hair. He held himself upright with confidence but his face told a different story. His eyes were frantic, like he was afraid that someone was going to jump out and attack him at any minute.

The second thing they noticed was how Sebastian and the boy were holding hands and then they thought that maybe the new kid was scared because of Sebastian. Sebastian wasn’t the most… how would you say it… gentle person. Even though he was their friend, Sebastian was arrogant and obnoxious and very straight forward. And his straight forwardness may have scared the new kid off.

“Hi Seb,” Jeff greeted him as Sebastian sat down next to him. He had let go of the new kid’s hand so he just stood there looking very out of place. “Who’s your friend?”

“Oh, this is Kurt,” He informed the group, reaching out his hand so that Kurt would come sit with him. “He’s new here,”

“I’ve heard of you before,” Trent said, excitedly. “You’re from McKinley.”

“Yeah, Kurt Hummel, right?” Thad asked him in which Kurt just slightly nodded his head. “You were apart of the New Directions,”

“That’s right and I’ve persuaded him to try out for the Warblers,” Sebastian beamed proudly. “Isn’t that right babe?” Kurt nodded his head again.

“Oh,” Wes said, raising his eyebrows at the other Warblers when Sebastian’s head was turned. So Kurt was “babe”? It wasn’t that Wes was homophobic or anything, in fact he was bisexual. No, it was just that Sebastian didn’t really seem like boyfriend material to him. He just hoped that Sebastian wouldn’t do anything stupid to break Kurt’s heart.

“That’s amazing,” Jeff exclaimed. “You're amazing Kurt. I watched your cheerleading performance at Nationals on TV last year. You were great,” Kurt just gave him a small smile before looking back to Sebastian.

The Warblers continued talking to one another about various subjects and one by one they subtly noticed how uncomfortable Kurt seemed. He was looking down at his hands, fidgeting with them and he seemed very nervous. They guessed that he was just shy or something like that and didn’t think much about it once they saw him. He would soon learn that they were all nice and trusting and soon they would become great friends.

Sebastian was the only person to confront Kurt. He took one of his hands so that he would stop and realize what he was doing before leaning in to whisper in his ear.

“Are you okay?” He asked. “You seem nervous,”

“I’m fine,” Kurt whispered back, still looking down. “I’m sorry, I’m probably embarrassing you in front of your friends,”

“What no,” Sebastian assured him. “You aren’t embarrassing me. They love you already, I can tell.” Kurt still didn’t seem convinced though so Sebastian continued to hold his hand, comforting him while not drawing any attention to him. Sebastian was more gentle than people gave him credit for.

Kurt was an odd fellow. He wasn’t weird like a nerd or a dork, he was just quiet and shy but sometimes he was too quiet and shy and it made it seem like he had a problem with people or something.

Kurt was an amazing singer. Later that day when the Warblers had met him, Kurt had auditioned for their group singing “I Want To Hold Your Hand” and his performance was outstanding. The emotion he put into his audition gave him a standing ovation and at the end of it he was near to tears. They would’ve been crazy to deny him into joining so they automatically accepted him and gave him Pavarotti, their mascot.

To say Kurt loved the bird was an understatement because Kurt took the bird with him everywhere. The bird’s cage was always on his desk during classes, always next to his bag on the floor at lunch and was always on his table with him when he did his homework. Kurt would take the bird out of his cage and would let him crawl on his finger while the bird sang. Kurt hummed along with him and everyone thought it was really cute.

Kurt didn’t really interact with everyone besides Sebastian and the bird. Sebastian was always holding hands with Kurt, they went everywhere together and the Warblers had never seen him so caring and kind towards another person before, they didn’t even know that it was possible. But then there was the couple, walking down the hallway hand in hand or kissing in the dorm room and it was really sweet. They only wished that Kurt would be more open with them so that they could get to know him better.

It wasn’t like they hadn’t tried to talk to Kurt because they had, it was just that they had given up. They would try to interact with him during the classes they shared or in their shared dorm room after classes but Kurt would just reply to them asking how his day was before returning his attention back to his work. And they knew that Kurt was trying to be rude or anything because he seemed way too sweet to do that but then they just wished that he knew that he could talk to them. It couldn’t be easy to transfer to a new school in the middle of the new semester, leaving all your friends behind and being hours away from your family. It just made them question why Kurt had come to Dalton in the first place.

They assumed that the two things, Kurt not talking to anyone and transferring were connected to each other but how, they didn’t know. So they let Kurt sit with them and they continued to ask how he was doing and if he needed anything in the hopes that he would open up more but he never did.

One day Kurt and Sebastian came to sit down with them at lunch like they usually did everyday when the group noticed something new about Kurt. He never ate anything. He would choose a small salad or a bowl of fruit to eat but would end up just pecking at it like he was Pavarotti. They didn’t really think much of it, just that maybe he had lost his appetite due to being upset about being away from everyone that he knew or that it had something to do with nerves so they didn’t question it or bring it up to Sebastian.

Sebastian however, noticed it and knew the reason behind it and it wasn’t just nerves. Kurt had a slight eating problem. It wasn’t much of a disorder, it was just that when he was under stress Kurt would stop eating. And it appeared to him that Kurt had been stressed for a long time seeing how thin and sickly he looked. You really had to look for it to notice it but Kurt was far too skinny. His uniform looked baggy and loose when he wore it and when he wasn’t in his uniform he wore pajama pants or sweatpants and a t-shirt or a hoodie. And it wasn’t like it was a crime or like it was abnormal for one to wear those pieces of clothing because all the boys wore things like that but the clothes that Kurt wore never fit him right, they were too big. And his facial structure was sharp, a little too sharp and his eyes were sunken in, giving him dark bags under his eyes that he had to cover with makeup. He was adorable to Sebastian but he would admit that Kurt was not the picture of health.

So Sebastian tried to help him. He would remind Kurt subtly to eat something even if it wasn’t much and would try to reduce the amount of stress his boyfriend felt even though his methods rarely ever worked. That day in particular was when David noticed that Kurt’s behavior was something more serious.

He had been conversing with Nick and Wes about potential ideas for group numbers for Regionals when his eyes drifted over to Kurt and Sebastian who were quietly talking to one another. He rarely ever heard Kurt speak which was probably why he was drawn to the scene and why he eavesdropped on their conversation.

Kurt had been staring at a granola bar that Sebastian had placed in front of him like it was poisonous or like it would attack him if he touched it. His eyes were wide and it seemed like he was trying to distance himself from the food as much as possible. Sebastian was sitting right next to Kurt with a comforting, encouraging hand on Kurt’s shoulder, trying to persuade him to eat.

“Come on Kurt,” Sebastian said. “You have to eat something,”

“I’m not hungry,” Kurt whispered back, once again fidgeting with his hands.

“You told me that at breakfast,” Sebastian reminded him and Kurt sighed. “Please, for me. You can do it,”

Kurt shook his head.

“Well can you tell me what’s bothering you then? Why you’re so worried today,”

“It’s nothing,” Kurt told him, his voice breaking a little, “I just miss them and they’re ignoring me,”

“Well what did you do?” Sebastian asked, rubbing Kurt’s back. “Not that you did anything wrong but why would they ignore you? I thought they were your friends,”

“It’s not important,” Kurt said. “I don’t want to talk about it but I’m not hungry,”

“It’s important if it’s bothering you babe. I want to help you. What did they do?”

“I have to go,” Kurt suddenly said, turning around to grab his bag and the bird cage. “Will you come with me?”

“Of course,” Sebastian said, standing up with Kurt and taking his hand. David had met eyes with Sebastian and had raised his eyebrow in a questioning manner as if to ask if Kurt was okay but Sebastian just smiled at him and waved his hand as if to assure David that he was fine. But David knew that he was lying because Kurt wasn’t okay, not if he was so stressed to the point that he was starving himself. So he decided that he would look out for Kurt and that maybe he could find a way to help him out. To find a way to make him feel more at home and welcome at Dalton or to make him feel more calm and relaxed. Kurt was a Warbler now and they were a tight group. They were all friends and they all looked out for each other to make sure they were okay. Kurt wasn’t any different to them.

Kurt had been at Dalton for a month now and it was Regionals. The competition was being held at McKinley and everyone could tell that Kurt was nervous about being at his old school. The reason why, well Sebastian of course was the only one to know of course and of course he didn’t tell them why. Not that the Warblers were trying to get all up in Kurt’s business or anything, it was just that they had started to get closer to the boy and they wanted to know if he was going to be okay.

Kurt was starting to act more comfortable around them. He still didn’t talk much but he seemed to pay attention to the conversations the boys had more instead of being off in his own little world. When he first arrived, all Kurt did was spend time in his dorm room with Sebastian if the rest of the Warblers were in the common room but now he occasionally joined them. Sure he sat away from them and usually did his own thing, homework or writing on a notebook but he seemed to enjoy their company more and that made the Warblers happy.

So after the competition where the Warblers had won they were all standing around outside, talking excitedly to one another about performing at Nationals in New York. They were really proud of themselves and of one another for winning and Wes was lecturing them about how hard they were going to have to work to win and how he was planning on adding extra rehearsals to their schedule so they could practice more. He was ignored for the most part except some teasing about how uptight and serious he was being. They wanted to celebrate, not rehearse.

Unfortunately their celebration was rudely interrupted by a group coming outside and a few of the members shouting.

“KURT HUMMEL,” One girl screamed, running up to the boy and almost knocking him over. She walked towards him while he walked back into a wall and hit his head, hard, against the bricks while the short, brunette pointed her finger into Kurt’s chest. “HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO US?”

“Rachel,” A tall boy said, coming up behind her along with a boy with obviously dyed, blonde hair, a boy with a mohawk, a girl with long, black hair and a girl with blonde hair pulled up in a ponytail. The rest of their group consisted of a boy in a wheelchair, another blonde girl with her hair pulled up in a ponytail, a well styled black girl, an Asian girl with blue streaked hair and a tall, skinny Asian boy who were all standing by the door and who looked scared.

“Rachel, come on leave him alone,” The blonde boy said from behind the tall boy. “It’s not his fault we lost,”

“The hell it’s not,” The girl with black hair said. “He probably leaked the setlist to the gay boys from Hogwarts,”

“Kurt wouldn’t do that you guys,” The tall boy told them. “Get off of him Rachel,”

“KURT, YOU KNEW HOW MUCH THIS MEANT TO US, HOW MUCH IT MEANT TO ME AND YOU BEAT US?” The girl named Rachel shouted at him causing Nick, Jeff and Sebastian to come over to the group so they could get Kurt away from the maniac. “I WILL NEVER FORGIVE YOU FOR THIS. I HATE YOU. I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU WOULD BETRAY US LIKE THAT,”

“Excuse me,” Sebastian said, passively aggressively as he tapped Rachel on her shoulder and pushed past her to get to Kurt. “Would you like to explain to me just as to why you are screaming at my boyfriend?”

“Boyfriend?” The group sputtered, shocked.

“Please tell me this is a joke,” The girl with long hair said. “I knew you guys did orgies there,”

“How dare you…” Jeff started to say but Nick held him back.

“I’m still waiting,” Sebastian said, pulling Kurt into a hug and noticing that his head was bleeding. “Fuck, you’re bleeding babe. Look what you fucking did you psycho. What the hell is wrong with you people?”

“Um, hi,” The tall boy said, awkwardly as he held out his hand and Sebastian shook it, hesitantly. “I’m Finn, Kurt’s step brother and this is Rachel, Santana, Sam, Puck and Quinn.”

“Hi,” Sebastian said, annoyed. “Now what the hell was that about?”

“He leaked our setlist to your show choir competition team, that’s what this is about,” The girl named Quinn said, her hands on her hips.

“Would you three stop it already,” The boy with the mohawk named Puck yelled. “Princess didn’t tell them okay, he wouldn’t do that. And look what you did Berry, he’s fucking bleeding you diva,”

“Well I’m sorry,” Rachel huffed. “But this is inexcusable. First he ditches us and now he tells all his new team members about our performances. He’s selfish you guys,”

“He is not Rachel,” The boy named Sam said. “You know how bad the bullying was. He couldn’t stay here,”

“Yeah Karofsky threatened to kill him and all you’re thinking about is yourself and a stupid competition that barely even matters,” Finn yelled at her. “You’re the one who’s selfish,”

“Wait what,” Nick asked, questioning as to what everyone was talking about. Who was Karofsky? Bullying? Someone threatened to kill Kurt? But why, he was so sweet and kind? Was it because he was gay? Were these people homophobic? “Come on Jeff, we have to go. Seb can handle it,” Nick said before trying to drag his boyfriend away but Jeff stayed put, wanting to defend Kurt so Nick stayed with him.

“Look I don’t know what’s going on here,” Jeff shouted, making himself known to the group. “But you people are horrible. I don’t even see how Kurtie could consider you people he’s friends. He didn’t leak your setlist okay? We won fair and square and if you can’t handle defeat and be a good sport then you have no business competing in the first place.”

“Oh whatever blondie,” The girl named Santana said, rolling her eyes. “How are we supposed to believe that, we don’t know what you guys talk about when you aren’t having sex with multiple people at a time at Hogwarts although I have a few ideas,”

“Alright that it’s,” Jeff said, pushing his sleeves up and starting to charge towards the girl before Nick and Sebastian held him back. “Let me at her,”

“No boys let him go,” Santana said, pushing up her own sleeves. “I’m about to show him what goes down when you mess with me, Lima Heights style. And it ain’t pretty, prep boy,”

“No, no fighting you guys,” Sam said, stepping in front of Santana to block her. “We’re competitors, not enemies,”

“We’re leaving,” Sebastian said, taking Kurt's hand and wiping the tears that had fallen down his face with his free hand. “Leave him alone, I don’t want you near him. Come on guys, lets go,”

Sebastian took Kurt with him as he walked away from the group, Nick and Jeff following behind him.

“What was that about Kurt?” Sebastian asked him once they had rejoined the Warblers. “I mean, you told me they were assholes but that girl attacked you,”

Kurt didn’t answer Sebastian and instead, cried into his chest and hugged him tightly.

“No hey no don’t cry babe,” Sebastian said, rubbing his back. “You’re okay,”

“Kurtie, you’re bleeding really bad, hon,” Jeff told him. “We need to get you to a doctor,”

“Jeff’s right,” Nick said. “We should take him to the hospital. He might have a concussion,”

“Shit,” Sebastian cursed, pulling Kurt away from him so he could see his face. “Hey Kurt, how do you feel right now? Are you dizzy?”

Kurt shook his head no.

“Do you feel sick?”

Again, Kurt shook his head.

“Does your head hurt at all?” Sebastian asked him.

Kurt nodded his head yes.

“Okay then. Let’s go,” He said, gesturing to the other boys. “We can take my car, let me just tell Wes that we’re leaving,”

So Sebastian told Wes about what happened and Wes wanted to complain to the show choir committee about the lack of sportsmanship the group showed but Sebastian said that they shouldn’t do it until they’ve talked to Kurt about it. Sebastian then left and went to his car where Nick, Jeff and Kurt were already inside waiting for him. Sebastian sighed, getting in the car and driving off, pissed that he was taking his boyfriend to the hospital for a concussion instead of being out and celebrating with his friends.

They got to the hospital and stayed there until around midnight while Kurt got checked out. Turned out he did have a mild concussion and his symptoms got worse as time went on. He had to have paperwork signed so that he could be released from the hospital but his dad was currently in DC so the papers had to be faxed over to him so he could sign them which was why they had stayed so long. And apparently his dad didn’t even care that Kurt had been hurt, nevertheless by people that had claimed to be his friends. He just signed the paperwork over the phone with Kurt and didn’t even ask him how he was feeling. Sebastian figured that not only did Kurt not have a good relationship with his so-called friends but he also didn’t have a good relationship with his family.

The four boys left the hospital and this time Nick drove so that Sebastian could sit with Kurt in the back seat.

“You feeling okay babe?” He asked Kurt who was half asleep at this point. The doctor had told him that it was safe for Kurt to fall asleep at this point but he still was afraid that Kurt would fall asleep and that he wouldn’t wake up so he tried to get Kurt to stay awake until they reached Dalton.

“Yes,” Kurt told him.

“Are you sure?”

“No,”

“You’ll be okay,” Sebastian assured him, pulling him into a hug. “I love you,”

“I love you too,” Kurt told him, snuggling into his chest while Sebastian kissed his forehead.

After the debacle at Regionals the Warblers became even more protective and concerned towards Kurt and they could feel him pulling away from them again. This time they didn’t let him go so easily. They invited him to watch movies with them in their common room or to ask for his opinions on various topics. They just wanted him to feel safe and included and they wanted to assure him that he had real friends, not fake ones like the friends he had at his old school.

So they became particularly concerned when Wes had called a late night Warbler rehearsal after dinner and when Kurt didn’t show up. Sebastian had told the group that Kurt would be a little late getting back to Dalton because he had spent the day in Lima with his dad and step-mom but then Kurt didn’t show up at all and the boys started to worry. Kurt wasn’t answering his phone and had been three hours late. It was getting late and the boys were considering telling the dean about their friend when he finally showed up.

Wes, David, Thad, Trent, Nick, Jeff and Sebastian were all in their dorm room that they shared with one another, conversing about what to do about their missing friend when they heard the door open and saw Kurt walk in the room. To say that the boys were relieved that Kurt had come back and that he wasn’t dead or stranded alone somewhere was an understatement but then they took a closer look and their panic came back.

Kurt was visibly shaking, soaked head to toe since it had been raining that day and had various cuts and bruises on his face. It was hard to tell whether the water on his face was rain or tears but they assumed that it was both. Kurt looked more scared then he usually did and hugged himself tightly as he slid down the door, breaking down into tears. It seemed like the boy hadn't noticed that he wasn’t alone and was surprised when the boys came up to him. Sebastian and Nick bent down in front of him as they both took one of his hands to hold.

“Kurt what happened?” Sebastian asked, trying to figure out whether he was more upset or angry and whether he would stay with Kurt or go and beat up whoever hurt him. “Where were you, we were scared?”

“He’s gonna kill me,” Kurt said, in between sobs. “He found me Seb… I was leaving my dad’s house, walking to my car when he attacked me with his friends and… and I tried to get away, to get my dad or Finn but they had already left and …” Kurt started to say but his voice trailed off before he continued crying.

“Who was it babe?” Sebastian asked, sharing a look with Nick. “Was it Karofsky?”

“Yes,” Kurt whispered. “Please Seb, I don’t want to die,”

“Hey, look at me,” Sebastian said, tilting Kurt’s head up so that they were looking into each other’s eyes. “You aren’t going to die, I promise you. Don’t worry, okay? But you have to tell us what happened so that we can help you. Can you do that?”

“No,” Kurt said, shaking his head and it broke the boys’ hearts to see how scared and vulnerable he was. “I don’t want to die. I can’t tell anyone,”

“Kurt babe,” Sebastian started to say. “You aren’t going to die, I told you that but you have to tell us what happened so that we can make sure it doesn’t happen again. You don’t want it to happen again right?” Kurt nodded his head. “Okay then, so how about we get you cleaned up and into some dry clothes and then you can tell us what happened.”

“You can’t tell anyone,” Kurt begged. “Please don’t tell my dad. All he’ll do is say that I deserved it for not sticking up for myself. Please Seb…”

“We won’t tell him okay?” Sebastian promised him. “Come on,”

He helped Kurt stand up and gave him a hug while Kurt continued to cry and Sebastian faced the Warblers, uncertain of what to do.

“Can someone get me some… I don’t know, band aids?” He asked. “What the fuck am I supposed to use?”

“Well go get some disinfectant and bandages from the nurse’s station,” Wes told him before leaving the room in a hurry with Thad and David.

“Did he really say that his dad was going to defend his attackers?” Trent asked, shocked. “What kind of sick person says something like that?”

“Well they don’t exactly have the best relationship with each other,” Sebastian sniffed. “That’s one of the reasons why he came here, so his dad could get rid of him and so he wouldn’t have to deal with the bullying at his old school,”

“That’s horrible,” Jeff said with tears in his eyes.

“I know,” Sebastian sighed, rubbing Kurt’s back. “I'm gonna help him change. Tell me when Wes comes back,”

Sebastian led Kurt into their room and shut the door before truing around to see Kurt sitting on his bed.

“You’re gonna be fine Kurt,” Sebastian assured him again. “You’re safe now,”

“I’m scared,” Kurt admitted, looking up into Sebastian’s eyes. “And it hurts,”

“What hurts?” Sebastian asked, sitting down next to Kurt on the bed.

“My head, I hit it on the ground.” Kurt explained. “And my wrist,” He said, holding out his arm so that Sebastian could see that his wrist was red and swollen. It was at least sprained. “Someone stomped on it,”

“Oh yeah that does look bad,” Sebastian told him, taking his arm and holding it gently. “But we can wrap it and ice it so it can rest. And at least it’s not the hand you write with right?”

“Right,” Kurt agreed. “I’m sorry Seb. I would’ve called but they broke my phone. I passed out and I guess they eventually left but when I woke up it was already pretty late so I started driving back here but my wrist… and it was far away… and…” Kurt’s voice broke off and he became overwhelmed and started crying again. “I’m so sorry,”

“Kurt you have nothing to be sorry for babe,” Sebastian assured him while bringing him into a hug. “I’m just sorry for not being there.”

“It’s not your fault,” Kurt told him, embracing the hug. “Can I change?”

“Yeah,” Sebastian said, letting Kurt go. “Go ahead,”

Kurt got off the bed and went over to his draw to pick out a pair of clean clothes before going into the bathroom to change. A few minutes later he came back out in dry clothes and went back over to Sebastian, hugging him again.

“I love you,” Kurt told Sebastian. “I really do and I’m sorry that I’m like this. I don’t want to be this way,”

“No Kurt,” Sebastian said. “You’re perfect. You really are and I don’t want you to change one bit. You’re cute and talented and smart and kind and you’re the best person I know. It’s not your fault everyone’s an asshole,”

“Do you mean it?” Kurt asked, sincerely.

“Every word. I love you too,” Sebastian assured him, giving him a kiss. “I’m so glad I met you and I promise, I’m never going to let anyone hurt you ever again,”

“I know you won’t,” Kurt said. “I’m tired,”

“Wes, David and Thad should be back soon but I guess if you want to we can lay down until they come back,” Sebastian suggested and he laid down with Kurt in his bed, his arms wrapped around the smaller boy.

Kurt was the best thing that had ever happened to Sebastian and he was damned if he was going to mess up what they had going on. From the moment Sebastian met Kurt that day when they had bumped into each other, from the moment he looked and met eyes with Kurt, he knew he loved him. And he was lucky that Kurt loved him back. And he wanted to hurt anyone that had ever hurt Kurt in the past and he wanted to protect him at all cost. And he was going to do that no matter what he needed to do. Kurt meant that much to him.

They fell asleep in each other’s arms and didn’t hear when Wes and Nick knocked on their door. The boys opened the door to find Kurt and Sebastian asleep and debated on whether they should wake the pair up or not.

“Aww, look how cute they are Wes,” Nick cooed. “You can’t possibly think about waking them up now,”

“Kurt needs to be looked at,” Wes explained. “They can be cute again once he’s fixed up,”

“Since when are you a doctor Wesley?” Nick huffed. “Let them sleep. Kurt’s probably exhausted as it is and you blabbing on and on about god knows what isn’t going to make him feel better. You can take care of your patient in the morning,”

“Fine then,” Wes said, rolling his eyes. “Let’s go,”

The boys softly closed the door and left Kurt and Sebastian to sleep peacefully. Wes just couldn’t believe what was happening to Kurt. He had heard from David about Kurt not eating when he got stressed and then that incident at Regionals with his old friends and now someone had tried to kill him. It wasn’t fair. Kurt was the most innocent, kind person he knew and to learn that he had so many people that hated him and that wanted to hurt him made him upset. If it was because Kurt was gay then people really needed to grow up and learn that hating someone because of the gender they loved was ridiculous and made no sense. And if it was because of Kurt’s personality then everyone was crazy. The poor boy needed a break and in the end, that's why Wes had decided to let him be.

It was now December, Kurt was attacked a month ago and he was still dealing with the effects of his attack. Sebastian and the rest of the Warblers had carried out their promise and hadn’t told anyone about what had happened that night but they were still considering it. Kurt was a mess and they meant that with all respect.

At first Kurt had gone on acting like everything was fine. His behavior was normal (or normal for Kurt anyway) and he stayed close to the Warblers and Sebastian. He didn’t leave the school not even if someone went with him but that was understandable. But then he had a nightmare.

Trent was the first one to wake up when he heard a high pitched scream coming from the other side of their room. He shared a room with Thad who was the next person to wake up and they walked out of their room into the common room to see a sleepy eyed Nick and Jeff also awake.

“Did you guys hear that?” Trent asked, rubbing his eyes. “Someone screamed,”

“Yep I heard it,” Jeff said, rubbing his ear. “It was definitely Kurtie, he’s the only one who can scream that loud,”

“Do you think we should check on him and Seb?” Thad asked. “To see if they need help,”

“I guess,” Nick said and the four of them walked over to Kurt and Sebastian’s door. Jeff knocked on the door.

“Seb? Kurt? Are you two okay?” He asked.

“Jeff, get the fuck in here now,” He heard Sebastian yell and he quickly opened the door and walked in, the other boys following behind him.

“Why did Kurt scream?” Nick asked.

“I don’t fucking know,” Sebastian yelled, getting out of his bed. “He screamed and then he ran in the bathroom and he won’t come out,”

“Well have you considered your choice of words Sebastian?” Trent asked and in return received a pillow thrown at him. “I guess not,”

“He had a goddamn nightmare,” Sebastian said, still cursing but lowering his voice some. “Before he screamed he was mumbling and he said his dad’s name and the name of his bully, Karofsky,”

“Oh the poor thing,” Jeff said, sympathetically. “Is this his first one?”

“I don’t know,” Sebastian groaned. “Why the fuck do people have to mess with him? He’s been through enough,”

“Seb,” Trent said. “I think you should check on him,”

“Right,” Sebastian said, walking over to the bathroom door. “Um… if you guys could like, leave that’d be great. I don’t think he’s going to want an audience right now,”

“Of course,” Thad said. “Tell us if you need anything and take care of him,”

The four boys left the room and Sebastian knocked on the bathroom door. “Kurt, are you okay in there? Can I come in?”

He pressed his ear against the door to hear muffled cries coming from the inside and sighed before opening the door. He found Kurt kneeled down in the corner, hugging himself in a tight ball, crying. The scene was heartbreaking and made Sebastian admittedly rush over to him to give him a hug.

“He was right there,” Kurt said, shaking. “He was right there Seb, he wanted to kill me. He almost killed me,”

“No he didn’t Kurt,” Sebastian said, tears welling up in his own eyes. “He’s not anywhere near here, you’re fine I promise. No one’s going to hurt you,”

“What did I do wrong?” Kurt asked, more to himself than to Sebastian. “Why do they all hate me Seb? They hate me so much.” He said through sobs.

“They don’t matter babe,” Sebastian assured Kurt. “I love you and the rest of the Warblers love you and that’s all that matters right, the people that do love you?”

“I miss them,” Kurt said. “I miss my friends and I miss my dad and I messed everything up,”

“No you didn’t. You didn’t mess anything up babe. You’re perfect. Please stop crying, you’re making me cry,”

“I’m sorry,” Kurt said, looking up at Sebastian and wiping the tear that fell down his face. “I love you,”

“I love you too,” Sebastian said, laughing when Kurt brushed off his tear. “And I always will,”

“Ok,” Kurt said softly, “I don’t want to go back to sleep,”

“You don’t have to if you don’t want to,” Sebastian told him “You can lay down with me and we can watch a movie ok? You can pick,”

“Ok,” Kurt said again, standing up with Sebastian and leaving the bathroom. They both got into Kurt’s bed, under the blankets and snuggled close together before Sebastian grabbed the remote and turned on the TV. He flipped through the channels until Kurt settled on a movie that he had never heard of before and they both watched the movie together, neither falling asleep. Once the movie was over Sebastian got an idea and dragged Kurt out of the bed, pulling him over to the window and opening it to reveal a beautiful sunrise.

“Look at that,” Sebastian said, sighing happily to himself as he hugged Kurt from behind. “Isn’t it beautiful?”

“Yeah,” Kurt said, smiling. “I love it,”

“And I love you,” Sebastian said, snuggling into Kurt’s neck and kissing him.

“Forever?” Kurt asked.

“Forever,” Sebastian assured.

“I love you too,” Kurt assured him back and they spent the rest of their morning in each other’s embrace watching the sunrise and for a moment Kurt thought he was going to be okay.

But Kurt and everyone else was soon to realize that Kurt was wrong.

It was winter break and everyone in Kurt’s dorm decided to stay at Dalton for the holidays since their families worked during the holiday and they decided that being with each other would be more fun. So they spent their break watching Christmas movies and drinking hot chocolate or singing Christmas carols or playing board games or doing puzzles. Kurt joined in on the movies once in a while but kept to himself for the most part and resorted to writing in a journal.

It wasn’t your typical teenage journal that was actually a diary full of secrets and gossip about one’s life. It was just a notebook full of random words that were written in Kurt's neat handwriting. Kurt’s logic for doing this was that it calmed him, just seeing the word neatly written in pen on a blank sheet of white paper. He could write words about how he felt but for the most part he wrote the things that he liked.

My friends.

Sebastian.

Singing.

Cats.

Clouds.

Coffee.

Watching the sunrise with Seb.

Writing.

Taking walks.

Reading.

Going to my classes.

Flowers.

Grass.

Trees.

Things along those lines. Just things that Kurt loved about his life. He was just trying to focus on the positives rather than the negatives. But sometimes that proved to be really difficult for him and one day was very difficult to deal with.

Sebastian had woken him up early that day to tell him that he was going out to get some things that he needed from the store and told Kurt that he would be back soon. Kurt said okay before falling back asleep and when he woke up his body went into a state of intense panic. Just the sight of the other side of his bed, empty when Sebastian usually laid there and waited for him to wake up threw his whole day off. He tried not to let it bother him too much so he got up and got ready like he usually did before grabbing his blanket and his notebook and walking out into the common room. He was thankful to find the rest of his friends were already awake, continuing their Christmas movie marathon by watching “Elf” and laughing at the movie. They greeted him and he greeted them back before sitting down in an empty chair and trying to pay attention to the screen. It wasn’t working out though. No matter how hard he tried not to think about Sebastian and how he had been gone when he had woken even though he already knew that Sebastian wouldn’t be there, the more he thought about other things.

His dad.

Finn.

Carol.

His family that sent him off to a private school because they didn’t want to deal with him.

Rachel.

Mercedes.

Quinn.

His old friends.

His old friends that hated him now.

Karofsky.

Azimio.

Bullying.

Slushies.

Locker shoves.

Dumpster dives.

Kissing.

Disgusting kissing that tasted awful.

Kissing that made him cry, that made him hate himself.

Kissing that made him feel so disgusting and awful that he wanted to hurt himself.

Fag.

Fairy.

Traitor.

Disappointment.

Waste of space.

Should just kill himself already.

This is what he found himself writing in his notebook and soon there was no trying to think about the positives because the negatives were pushed to the front of his brain and he couldn’t get rid of them. He felt tears come to his eyes and not wanting to cry in front of everyone but then not wanting to be alone, he got up out of his chair and went to sit down on the floor. Behind the couch. Under the table.

Why Kurt picked a table to sit under, he didn’t really know. He just needed a confined area of space that was for him only but he didn’t want to go back into his empty dorm room, he wanted to hear his friend laugh and he wanted to hear the movie so he chose the table. He tried to breathe but it didn’t really work, the air wouldn’t come into his lungs. He silently cried, his pen shaking in his finger and his body wrapped around him as he tried to calm down and tried to think about the positives. But nothing good came. So he tried to shut his mind off. He tried to clear everything out so that he didn’t have to think about anything and closed his eyes shut.

He didn’t know how long he had been sitting there but he was relieved when he heard the door to their room open and heard familiar footsteps walk into the room. He wanted to get out and run into Sebastian’s arms but something inside him told him not to and kept him in place.

“Where’s Kurt?” Sebastian asked, taking off his scarf and coat.

“Under the table,” Wes said casually.

“What?” Sebastian asked confused as he walked over to the table and peered down to see Kurt sitting in a ball covered in a blanket. “Why did you let him sit underneath the table?”

“I don’t know,” Jeff said, still paying attention to the movie. “He seemed like he had his mind set on sitting underneath the table so we let him sit under there. Besides, who are we to tell him what to do? Is it a crime to sit under a table?”

“No,” Sebastian sighed. “I guess it’s not,”

Sebastian reached out to grab Kurt’s hand to pull him out from underneath the table when he noticed the notebook that Kurt had been writing in. Kurt hadn’t really seemed to notice his presence and Sebastian picked up the notebook, reading what Kurt had most recently written.

“Oh Kurt,” He said softly, looking back down to see that Kurt was shaking and that his face was stained with tears. “What happened?”

Kurt only shook his head.

“Come on. Let’s go,” Sebastian said, motioning Kurt to take his hand so he could get up. Kurt took his hand and Sebastian pulled him up before getting an idea. He looked up above his head and smiled, mischievously to himself.

“Look what we’re standing under,” He said in a sing-song voice. “Mistletoe,”

“Kurt looked up and then looked back to Sebastian with a perplexed look, not connecting the two things together. That was until Sebastian dipped him back and kissed him passionately on his lips. Kurt kissed back and they stayed like that until the Warblers turned around and caught them in the position they were in.

“Eww gross,” Trent said, throwing a pillow at Sebastian.

“Get a room Seb,” David groaned, burying his face into another pillow.

“You two are worse than Nick and Jeff,” Wes complained before turning back around to see Nick and Jeff snuggling together, eskimo kissing one another. “Never mind, I take that back,”

“That’s what I thought,” Sebastian smirked before tilting Kurt back up and leading him into their room. “Don’t interrupt us,”

“Trust us, we won’t,” Thad assured him before Sebastian closed the door.

“So are you okay Kurt?” Sebastian asked, turning around to look at his boyfriend. “What happened?”

“I don’t know,” Kurt whispered, looking down like he was ashamed of himself. “I woke up and you were gone and I know it’s stupid because I knew you weren’t going to be there but it still freaked me out for some reason and I got upset and I didn’t know what to do. I got dressed and I tried to pay attention to the movie that everyone was watching but I kept thinking about you and then I started thinking about everyone else and instead of writing down things that I liked, I started writing the things down that I didn’t like. And then I got really overwhelmed and I couldn’t breathe and so I got up and sat under the table because I didn’t know where else to go but… I’m so sorry Seb. I know that it was stupid of me to get so upset but I don’t know what happened,” Kurt explained, rapidly.

“Hey, take a breather babe,” Sebastian said, walking over to Kurt and rubbing his back. “It sounds like you had a panic attack. But you’re alright now okay?”

“Okay,” Kurt said, hugging Sebastian. “Please don’t leave me right now,”

“I won’t,” Sebastian promised him. “I promise. So do you want to watch the movie with them or…?”

“Can we just stay in here?” Kurt asked.

“Yeah of course,” Sebastian said before walking over to Kurt’s bed and laying down in it with him. They snuggled up with one another like they usually did, wrapped in blankets and in each other’s embrace and this time Sebastian picked a movie.

“I love you Sebastian,” Kurt said, smiling up at his boyfriend. “I love you so much,”

“I love you so much too Kurt,” Sebastian smiled back.

Kurt had resorted to a different method to manage his stress… running. He knew it probably wasn’t the best thing to do seeing how little he ate but then again, was really anything he ever did a good idea? He didn’t think so. So running was his new thing.

He felt free when he ran, like there was nothing holding him back or there was nothing weighing him down. When he ran he didn’t need to focus on all his problems or the things that bothered him, all he focused on was moving his feet in front of the other one and his breathing. He could run for hours if he wanted to and one day he actually did.

It had been a bad day for Kurt. He had had two exams and a project to present in his classes that day and then a Warbler practice after lunch and he felt like he needed to relax. So he went out after dinner and ran. Some of the other Warblers went out with him and watched him as they sat on the bench and talked with one another.

And Kurt ran. He lost track of time but he could tell that it was getting late when he noticed that the sun was setting and he would’ve stopped but he was on a roll. It felt good to him, to push his body through all the pain and sweat. Yes maybe it was a bad idea to run to the point where you’re in pain but it wasn’t like the pain that he felt when he was shoved in a locker. The pain felt good so he didn’t stop.

“What are you guys doing out here?” Sebastian asked Jeff, Nick and Trent as he walked out to the track and saw the guys on the bleachers.

“Kurt’s running,” Nick said, pointing over to where Kurt was on his probably hundredth lap around the track.

“Shit, you idiots,” Sebastian hissed. “How long has he been like that?”

“Like what?” Jeff asked. “He likes running,”

“He looks like he’s going to fall over Jeff,” Sebastian said, irritated.

“Oh. Well we’ve been out here since dinner which was at six,” Trent said, thinking out loud.

“And it’s around eight right now,” Nick added.

“So that means it’s been two hours,” Jeff said happily. “Woo, Kurtie’s really good at that,”

“Oh my god,” Sebastian groaned before jogging over to Kurt. “Hello babe,”

“Hi,” Kurt said, shortly, out of breath. “What are you doing here?”

“The better question is what are you doing here? It’s been two hours since I last saw you and I miss you,” Sebastian said, giving Kurt puppy dog eyes.

“Sorry. I knew it was getting late but you know… it’s just been a stressful day,” Kurt said.

“Oh,” Sebastian said, his face dropping. “Do you want to talk about it?”

“I prefer running,”

“For two hours straight. Is that even healthy?”

“No but neither is being stressed out so I take what I get,” Kurt shrugged.

“Well what if we find a better way to get rid of your stress,” Sebastian suggested slyly. “We could make out,”

“Seb,” Kurt whined, although he did smile.

“Please,” Sebastian begged. “You’re so cute and I haven’t seen you all day. I love you,”

“Fine,” Kurt smirked. “But I’m taking a bath first,”

“Okay let’s go,” Sebastian said excitedly, taking Kurt’s hand and dragging him off the track.

They went back to their dorm room and Kurt showered and got ready for bed and then the two boys got into bed and cuddled up with each other. Kurt kissed Sebastian and Sebastian kissed back and they stayed like that for a while before Sebastian pulled Kurt into a hug.

“Are you sure you don’t want to talk about it?” Sebastian asked him. “I just ask because… I mean you could’ve changed your mind and I want you to know that I’ll listen to you,”

“I’m okay Seb,” Kurt assured him. “I just had a lot of work to do today and I'm not used to having so much. I was always on top of my work at McKinley, I was at the top of my class but here it’s just a little harder. But I got it done so I don’t have to worry anymore. I just wanted to run and I guess I lost myself a little too much,”

“Oh,” Sebastian said, rubbing Kurt’s back. "Well if you ever need help you can always ask me,”

“I know Seb,” Kurt said. “But thank you. For… just everything Seb. It means a lot to me,”

“Well you mean a lot to me,” Sebastian smiled.

“So do you,” Kurt smiled back.

Nick, Jeff, Wes and David were all in the common room doing a puzzle when Sebastian and Kurt walked in, hand and hand and stood facing each other with their foreheads pressed against each other.

“Why don’t you just go lay down and I’ll be in a minute, okay babe?” Sebastian told Kurt who nodded his head and wiped some tears on his face as he walked into their room.

“What’s wrong with Kurt?” David asked curious.

“He’s sick,” Sebastian said, rubbing his eyes. “He’s got a fever,”

“Oh, should I get the nurse?” Jeff asked, standing up.

“No, he’ll be fine I think,” Sebastian told them. “I don’t think he’d like that since he’s not really a people person. I’m just going to lay down with him and maybe he’ll sleep it off,”

“Oh okay,” Jeff said, sitting back down. Well tell me if you need anything,”

“I will,” Sebastian said before walking into their room to find Kurt curled up in a ball on his bed.

“You feeling alright babe?” Sebastian asked, rubbing Kurt’s back.

“I don’t feel good,” Was all Kurt said back.

“I know you don’t, you’re burning up. Do you want anything?” Sebastian asked.

“A hug,” Kurt told him and Sebastian laughed a little.

“I mean like medicine or something Kurt,”

“You don’t want to hug me?” Kurt asked, tears in his eyes.

“What no,” Sebastian exclaimed, laying down admittedly and hugging Kurt. “I always want to hug you Kurt, I love you. I just want to make you feel better,”

“I hate being sick,” Kurt pouted. “It’s not fair, I never get sick,”

“Well you just have to take care of yourself more Kurt. You’re stressing yourself out too much, it’s no wonder you aren’t feeling good right now,”

“I’m sorry,” Kurt whispered. “I really do try, it’s just hard,”

“I know you’re trying,” Sebastian assured him. “And I know it’s been rough for you but you’re doing really good, trust me,”

“I trust you,” Kurt told him. “And I love you too,”

“I love you,” Sebastian said, kissing Kurt’s forehead

#glee #glee fanfiction #kurtbastian #kurt hummel #sebastian smythe #the warblers #gleecharactertot2021

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judediangelo75 · 4 years ago

Text

Crushed

Okay, so I mentioned an a random post that I wanted to show the two halves that make, well her.

A painfully timid and skittish side (which mainly developed when she started living with her mother when she came to London. While she can hold her ground against her a bit more, she still fears her mother) and the coldhearted side (which developed at Hogwarts, where all the issues, tragedies and so on harden her).

I was on my Wattpad where I can a collection of Judith and Talbott stories (though there’s not much backstory or structure on there) and this story definitely would show that timid side of her. I tweaked it so it can be better than what I have posted over there.

Just to be clear: This side DOES exist. It’s her most vulnerable side of her. The reason it’s not shown is because Judith doesn’t like showing that side of her. Where she feels like a piece of glass that can break at any second.

She struggles with anxiety. She doesn’t like having too many eyes on her, she feels like people are constantly watching for any mistakes like her mother and exploit it. It gets pretty bad to where she gets anxiety attacks (she usually runs and hides out for awhile until it’s over. Like I said, she doesn’t like showing this side of her, and WILL NOT share this side unless you pry it out of her).

While she doesn’t show it often, she does talk peoples’ words to heart at times. Which doesn’t help her low self esteem.

She does her best to find coping mechanisms to help over the years and does build genuine confidence. But it takes time.

Alright there, you have a back of backstory of that side of her.

Just FYI, this is just to show that side of her (like if her more dominant side; because usually when you push her, that cold side would seep through a bit. You would hardly ever see her skittish)

Okay, I rambled on enough. ON WITH THE STORY!

(Judith Harris)

"There goes Demented Harris," I heard someone whispered to their friend before they broke out into snickers as I walked out of my Transfigurations class. I just kept my head down and walked past them.

Sometimes I think that coming to Hogwarts was a mistake.

Ever since the incident with my brother years ago, everyone suspects that I'll be just like him.

Become hellbent on finding the Cursed Vaults, getting expelled, and disappear. Never to be heard from again.

I have broke a few curses since my second year but I stayed pretty sane. I’m a good student and sought to become a Healer when I graduate. I don’t plan on dropping off of the face of the Earth...

Even though I’m sure nobody would miss me if I did...

I sighed. I would’ve thought some people would at least be a bit grateful for what I’ve done for them, for the school, thus far. But like my mother always said, I’m asking for too much in life.

It’s fine though. If I can't find love and appreciation in people, then I can in magical creatures at least.

"Miss Harris?" I blinked, coming out of my thoughts to look down. Professor Flitwick smiled up at me once he saw he had my attention.

"Good day, Miss Harris," he greeted. I gave a shy smile and nodded, whispering a soft hello.

"If it’s not too much trouble, if you're free, I was wondering if you can assist me in a class for first years. One of my top students already agreed to help, but I would love one of my favorites to join in on the lesson," he said. My smile widen a bit before I nodded once more, following the small man to the Charms classroom.

There were times I wished I joined Ravenclaw. I enjoyed spending time with the ex-Dueling Champion. He was one of the few people who treated me with kindness. He didn’t see me as my brother, but for me.

I loved to help him, when it’s for tutoring, helping for the younger students or even for helping the Frog Choir whenever he needs extra help (he’s disappointed that I didn’t actually join, but settled for this arrangement).

I even spend my birthday, which was also his, with him. Something I haven’t done since Papa died.

I let out a mental sigh. But I wasn’t a Ravenclaw. Which might as well be a blessing, seeing how I have an easier time avoiding him.

"Ah, here we are!" I almost missed Mr. Flitwick's delightful cheer when we entered the classroom. All I could focus on what the feeling of my blood going cold when I saw who was the other teaching assistant.

Talbott Winger...

I quickly ducked my head when he turned to look over in Mr. Flitwick and I's direction. How did that saying go?

Speak of the devil and he shall appear? Whoever said that was on something...

"I hope we didn't keep you waiting, Mr. Winger," Mr. Flitwick said as he hopped up on his tower of books. From the corner of my eye, I saw Talbott give him a small smile.

"Not at all Professor. What will we be helping you teach today," he asked. As Professor Flitwick explained today's lesson, I stood quietly a few feet away from Talbott, trying to make myself as invisible as possible. Flitwick pointed to the basket of feathers and had us place one at each seat. I remained silent as I handled my task from one side of the room.

I developed a crush on Talbott when he helped me become an Animagus. To this day, I don't know why he agreed to help me. Maybe because I have access and knew things that he didn't?

Either way, I couldn't help but to fall for him.

He just seem so handsome to me. From his neat, slicked back hair to his beautiful red eyes.

I appreciate the fine art of sarcasm, which he seems to be a master in (next to me of course). I find him hilarious whenever he’s feeling sassy or playful.

Helping him find his mother's necklace made me realize that there is a beautiful heart and creative mind that he hides under that aloof and unapproachable exterior.

Which made me fall faster.

The smile that spread on his face when he said that we were friends just melted my heart in a helpless puddle of love...

But I wouldn't really go as far we were "buddy-buddy". More like acquaintances, hell I'll be lucky enough to call us that even. I would see him around, maybe give a wave. Half of the time he rarely sees it though, making me look awkward in the process...

I don't know why I try to get his attention. It doesn't matter because I know he doesn't feel the same way about me. I remember his reaction when I confessed to him, clear as day.

--------------------------------------------

Flashback

"Rather than erase pre-existing memory, it might be easier for you if you tell Mr. Winger a new piece of information. Something that he didn't know before and won't forget, then use the Memory Charm to erase that memory," Flitwick suggested. I heard Talbott made a noise of agreement. I turned to find him sizing me.

"I'm okay with that. If you're just gonna erase my memory of it, you might as well tell me an interesting secret, Judith," Talbott suggested, a hint of mischief dancing in those red eyes. I bit my lip and shyly glanced at the Ravenclaw boy. Maybe I can confess my feelings and see how he feels about me...

"Th-Then this might be a g-good opportunity to tell y-y-you that... I-I-I fancy you, Talbott..." Flitwick and Talbott looked at me in shock.

"Oh my!" Flitwick gasped. I felt my face burn with embarrassment and shame as Talbott looked anxiously at me.

"Wh-what? Are... are you serious," he exclaimed. I rubbed my arm sheepishly, waiting for him to say more.

"Why? I mean... er..." I felt a bit of dread build in the pit of my stomach. Was he surprised? Or was he uncertain on how to let me down gently?

"Thank you," he finally said, though it came out more like a question. I buried my burning face in my hands.

"This probably wasn't the right time..." Or any time for that matter.

The boy rarely looked in my direction, why would I even think he would express some kind of interest in a witch like me?

"Ahem, perhaps now would be a good time to try casting Obliviate..." I never agreed with Professor Flitwick more. I quickly pulled out my wand, pointing it at Talbott.

For a moment, I could’ve sworn a look of protest in his red eyes, but didn’t want to dwell on it too much.

Talbott was not leaving this room with that memory, not if I can help it.

After casting the spell, Talbott looked lost then a little frustrated, like he was struggling to remember something.

"What do you remember, Talbott," I asked as I withdrew my wand. I needed to know if the spell worked or not so I determine if I should go into hiding for the rest of my time at Hogwarts...

"I remember you choosing to cast Obliviate on me, then... nothing," He replied. I let out a sigh of relief.

"That means Obliviate worked," I cheered. Talbott looked at me suspiciously.

"Now you've gotten me curious. What did you tell me," he asked.

Ha! You're hilarious if you think I'm repeating that situation twice. I'd sooner jump into the Black Lake.

"I'll tell you later," I smirked. By later, I mean never.

Like ever.

He returned the smirk.

"I'm going to hold you to that..." Over my dead body, Winger...

--------------------------------------------------------------------

Ever since then, only two people know of my crush on Talbott.

Professor Flitwick and Penny.

I'm pretty sure he forgot about that whole situation and I'm more than grateful for it. I wasn't gonna confess again back then and I'm not looking to confess now.

Once the classroom was set up, the first years filed in and took their seats. Professor Flitwick introduced both of us to the class. As Flitwick went over the basics of the lesson, Talbott turned to look at me. I almost jumped out of my skin.

"How are you, Judith," he asked, a small smile tugging on his lips.

"I-I'm o-okay... and yourself," I stuttered. Judith, words! Use them!

"I'm doing good... I must admit, being here together brings back memories," he said. I fidgeted, already knowing what he was implying.

"O-oh," I asked, trying to play dumb. He looked me in my eyes.

"Yeah, where we came to Flitwick to learn the Memory Charm... I'm glad you talked me out of using it on Merula by the way," he admitted, his smile growing. I felt a blush blossom on my cheeks.

Gods, why is he so handsome?

"It's not a problem, Talbott," I said softly, looking down so he wouldn’t see my red face. He hummed before saying,

"You know, you never told me what you said to me when you erased my memory.”.

"Miss Harris, do you think can come and demonstrate the proper stance and help the class correct their stance?" I darted away to help Professor Flitwick. The Gods are looking out for me today.

------------------------------------------------------

(Talbott Winger)

I frowned when the young Hufflepuff basically ran away from me to help Flitwick.

Judith seems naturally shy, but never have I ever seen her outright run from something. She took on Cursed Vaults, but she runs from a simple question.

Ever since she erased my memory of whatever she told me, the situation would pass through my mind from time to time. I just wasn't sure how to approach the topic with her. Today seem like the perfect opportunity to broach the topic with the cute Hufflepuff.

Yes, I said cute. Because she is.

I admit I didn't like how she was so pressed to help me in the beginning but I slowly grew fond of the girl.

Plus, she was very beautiful.

Ever since I hit my growth spurt, I towered over the Hufflepuff by at least a good 5 to 6 inches. She was a bit on the short side, but where I was standing, she seems small and it was adorable.

Her sweet face was one of my favorite things to look at. Despite her shyness, her facial expressions usually spoke for her sometimes. The way her nose would scrunch up in distaste when she heard something unpleasant or she didn't like. The way her brow would crease in concentration when she's in class or studying. The way she would hide her flushed cheek behind her hand when she's embarrassed. The way her eyes would speak for her when she can't formulate words...

I normally wouldn't pay much attention to the opposite sex as far as physical appearance but I must admit, there was a time or so where I wondered what she looked like in more form fitting clothes, instead of her House robes or her trusted yellow hoodie.

Her shyness made her all more endearing.

The way her gold eyes would widen slightly when someone focuses their attention on her. The way her sweet voice would sometimes stutter when she tries to talk. Sometimes hitting a higher octave when she feels insulted. How she would bring the bottom half of her hoodie to cover her face when she's blushing. How she fiddles with her dark brown hair when she's nervous.

She was cavity-inducing...

"Mr. Winger, can you come up with Miss Harris to cast today's spell?" I heard Professor Flitwick call.

I smiled as I walked up to stand beside the suddenly flustered Hufflepuff. Together we were able to levitate our own feathers, flying them across the room. I peeked over at Judith, seeing a beautiful smile spread on her face. My heart fluttered at the sight.

Such a shy and quiet beauty.

"Excellent, just excellent," Flitwick praised. Judith looked down, shuffling her feet. We soon went on the opposite sides of the room to help any students with the spell. I stole some glances at her, finding her smiling and laughing with the first years, applauding them when they successfully cast the spell.

She looked so happy...

--------------------------------------------------

Once class was over and we finished cleaning the classroom, Judith was already gone before I could question her again. I softly cursed beneath my breath.

"Is something the matter, Mr. Winger," Professor Flitwick asked. I perked up a bit. Maybe he knows, he was there after all...

"I was wondering if you could help me with something... about Judith," I said softly. He nodded.

"Do you remember what Judith told me the day you taught us the Memory Charm?" He looked surprised and mused over what I said.

"So I'm assuming Miss Harris never told you what she said that day," he said. He shook his head.

"I'm sorry, Mr. Winger, but it is simply not my place to tell you," he sighed. I rubbed a hand over my face, suddenly tired. Will I ever know what that girl said?

"May I ask you something, Mr. Winger?" I looked up the the short man.

"Is it possible you fancy the girl? I've noticed how you looked at her during class," he asked. I felt a blush working its way up to my neck.

Am I obvious?

"Of course not, Mr. Winger. But you are in my house, I take the time to learn my students throughout the years," Flitwick chuckled. I glared at the man's teasing.

"Yes... I started to grow fond of her and she is rather endearing," I admitted, rubbing the back of my neck. The professor smiled at me.

"Although I can't tell you what she said, I'm sure you can get your answer if you spend some more time with the girl," he offered. I frowned.

"But I rarely see her around, except for class and in passing," I said. The girl was extremely scarce, despite having her own friends. Flitwick looked thoughtful for a few moments before saying,

"Why not ask Hagrid for her whereabouts? I know she spends a decent amount of time with the man." Not a bad idea...

"I'll go do that now, thank you Professor and enjoy the rest of your day," I smiled, walking out.

Time to catch me a little Hufflepuff.

--------------------------------------------------------

"Hello, Hagrid," I said, approaching the giant man. Hagrid turned to me with a big smile.

"Hello there, Talbott! What can I do fer ya?" Fang barked and ran up to me. I chuckled and bent down to pet the dog.

"I was hoping if you could help me find someone," I said as I rubbed Fang's belly. The man laughed cheerfully.

"Why of course, m' boy! Who are you lookin' fer?," he asked.

"Judith, have you seen her," I asked, silently praying he'll agree to help. Hagrid looked taken aback at my request.

"I- er..." I rose a brow at him.

"I don't know Talbott... Judith made me promise not to tell anyone where she goes when she has free time," he said, looking a bit sad.

Here I thought I preferred being alone, but clearly she has me beat...

"Why is it that she wants to be alone so much," I asked. I was a bit upset that I couldn't find the girl as easily as I would like.

"There are some cruel kids in this ‘ere school, Talbott. The girl has a lot more weight on her shoulders than anybody realizes," Hagrid sighed. I frowned.

"What does that mean," I asked.

"Pay close attention to what people say when she's around," Hagrid simply said.

---------------------------------------------------------------

Taking the man's advice, I watched the girl as closely as possible the next few weeks. I must admit, it hurt me seeing the girl being pushed around.

Demented Harris.

Jinxed Judith.

Jamal #2.

The shoves.

The laughs.

The public humiliation.

Those hurt gold eyes, shimmering with unshed tears.

No wonder she's so quiet and hardly around. Any form of attention brought to her is negative.

I miss seeing her smile...

Today I planned on confronting her, hopefully to provide some comfort.

In my Animagus form, I silently followed the girl as she walked out of the castle in the direction of the Magical Creature Reserve. Perching myself in a tree nearby, I watched as she walked in a grassy field, carrying a bag of creature feed.

As she approached a Niffler, Knarl, Porlock, Diricrawl, and Abraxan all perked up at the sight of her.

"Feeding time, my loves," she called, her voice sweet and full of affection. The creatures all bounded towards her. Her Niffler, bounded up her legs, torso to rest on her shoulders. The Knarl rolled around her feet before bumping into her left foot. The Porlock trotted up to nuzzle her right calf, it's tail waging. Her Diricrawl nuzzled her left leg, flapping its small wings. The Abraxan trotted around her, nuzzling her hair.

The girl was giggling at her creatures’ enthusiasm.

"One at a time, everyone. You will all get your turn," she said. She looked so cute, surrounded by all these creatures.

Once she fed them all, she and them all walked around the field and to my hiding place. The Abraxan looked directly at me and huffed. It turned and used its hide legs to kick the tree. I let out a surprised squawk and flew out before I could fall.

"Angel! What's gotten into you, it's just an eagle," Judith cried, running up to the winged horse to soothe it. I landed a few feet away and her Porlock stared at me warily.

Can her creatures tell I'm not really just an eagle? The Porlock went up to me, sniffing me before letting out a soft huff of distrust.

Yeah, they can...

Giving up the act, I transformed back into my human form. The Porlock let out a small startled cry and ran to Judith, hugging her leg.

"What's wrong, Baron-" Judith froze when she saw me standing there. I let out a bashful smile.

"Talbott! Wh-what are y-you..." she trailed off, looking down. I slowly walked towards her, doing my best not frighten her.

"I just wanted to see you, Judith," I said softly.

"Why," she asked firmly, turning to face me. I took in her full appearance and blushed a bit.

She was wearing a floor length sundress, white on the top that gradients to a soft shade of yellow. It was form fitting, hugging her curves perfectly. Her full chest, small waist, her abs, her slowly rounding hips.

Her hair was in twists. Most of it was pulled back in a low ponytail while the rest formed her bang that occasionally sweep over her right eye.

Her face was free of makeup, save a gloss over her plump lips. Her skin was basically glowing...

I swallowed thickly.

She was...uh... rather developed for someone was just 16.

Oh boy...

"I want to spend some time with you," I said, reminding myself to breathe. Her pretty gold eyes widen and she shifted uncomfortably on each foot.

"S-spend time with m-me," she repeated, sounding lost. I nodded, getting closer. We were only less than a foot apart now and I could smell her perfume. I tried my best to keep my breathing even, even though I was to take in more of that pleasant smell.

I held out my hand. She looked down, extremely confused.

"We could start with a walk around the Creature Reserve... if you'd like," I suggested, silently hoping that she'll say yes.

A few moments past and I could feel my nerves starting to take over. Before I could pull back, Judith laid her small hand in mine, stepping close.

"Okay... but we're visiting the rest of my creatures in the meanwhile," she said, staring at my chest. Slowly, I grasped her chin to tilt upwards so she can meet my eyes.

She had one of prettiest eye colors I've seen, I could get lost in them all day...

"Of course, anything for you," I said with a smile. Her eyes went wide and she abruptly buried her face in my chest. I felt my heart stutter at her unexpected closeness but didn't push her away.

Gods, she was so cute...

"C'mon, what other creatures do you have," I chuckled, gently nudging her from her hiding place. She flustered at our proximity to one another and simply held my hand, leading me to other parts of the reserve.

The entire time, I couldn’t help but to notice the feeling of her hand in mine.

Her hand had a few callouses on her fingertips and a bit on her palm, assuming from all the writing and physical work that she does. But her hand felt soft overall.

To me, it shows how strong she is, all while still having a gentle touch.

Perfectly her...

--------------------------------------------------

I made some decent progress with Judith the next few weeks.

She was able to open up to me and allow me to help her take care of the creatures she adopted. It was nice to see her laugh and smile around me.

There was moments of slight awkwardness, like some of her creatures pushing us closer together. The bigger creatures were especially known for this. One time, Griffin, her Hippogriff, purposefully picked up the girl and set her on his back, as if going on flight. He never gave her adequate time to properly hold on, so when he took off, she would fall over and I have to race to catch her. I always found myself holding her protectively against my chest, our faces just an inch or two apart.

More than once, I've been tempted to kiss her.

But I simply set her down while she shyly thanked me and scurried off.

We were sitting side by side each other, under the shade of a large tree. Another sundress hugged her frame, this time white and royal blue. Her Porlock, Baron, was cuddling up against her as she scratched behind his ears.

"Hey Judith," I called out softly. Her pretty gold eyes shyly glanced at me.

"Yes," she answered. Taking a deep breath, I brought up the question,

"Why wouldn't you tell me what happened in Charms class that day?" she stiffen a bit and Baron let out a soft huff of worry. I reached out for her hand, intertwining our fingers.

"Please don't shut me out, Judith. I just simply want to know," I said softly. I watched as she gave the young Porlock a final scratch behind his ears before sending him off.

“I-I... I’m scared to see your reaction again,” she quietly admitted. I gave her hand a gentle squeeze.

“Hey, we’re a bit older and mature now. I’m sure I can handle it better this time,” I told her. She peeked at me from her short curly lashes before looking away.

She mumbled something under her breath.

"What was that," I asked, scooting over closer. The sweet smell of coconuts and cocoa butter greeted my senses, and I wanted to close my eyes in bliss.

"I...Talbott," she said a bit louder. Growing bold, I gently grasp her chin to look so she can face me.

"One more time for me, Judith..." Tears welled up in her eyes, and she let out a soft whimper.

"I fancy you, Talbott," she quietly sobbed, trying to pull away from me. I froze. Judith likes me...?

She feels the same way.

My lack of response made things worse as her eyes grew wide and frantic.

"I-I-I'm sorry! I di-didn't- you-you don't ha-have to-" her ramblings with a soft gasp. I pulled the girl into my lap, hugging her.

Judith went still, her nerves undoubtedly getting the best of her.

"There is nothing to be sorry for, little bird... I fancy you too," I whispered into her hair. She shyly met my eyes, hope shining brightly in those gold orbs.

"Y-Y-You do," she asked, trying to blink away any tears in her eyes. I gently wiped her tears away from my thumbs, she let out a soft breath at my touch.

"I do, Judith. And I want to prove it to you. Everyday... While at Hogwarts and beyond," I said softly. Feeling bold, I peppered kisses all over her face. Her eyes fluttered closed as I did this, her breathing slowly evening out. When I pulled back a little, she clenched at my robes with a whimper, pressing herself against me.

"T-Talbott, I-I-I..." Her expression was uncertain and fearful. I noticed how her gaze would land on my lips before darting back up to meet my gaze.

Rubbing her back, I leaned in and pressed my lips against hers.

She readjusted herself so she would be straddling my lap, her lips still moving shyly against mine. I groaned a little and squeezed her a bit closer. My hands followed the outline of her waist and hips, memorizing it. One of her hands was clenching at my robes and the other fisted in my hair. I groaned throatily. Gods, she's so perfect...

I pulled away, kissing the tip of her nose.

"You're so beautiful and perfect, darling," I cooed, nuzzling her cheek. I could partially feel the temperature rise and chuckled.

"And adorable," I added, pecking her lips. She pouted at me when I pulled away. I chuckled again.

"Don't give me that cute sad face," I told her. She grumbled but snugged against my chest. I sighed and ran my fingers through her hair.

"Talbott..." I hummed, letting her know I was listening.

"I like you," she said, kissing my cheek. I smiled and squeezed her tight.

"I like you too..."

#hphm #hphm mc #hphm talbott #hphm talbott winger #hogwarts mystery #harry potter hogwarts mystery #judith harris #hogwarts mystery talbott #talbott x mc #talbott x jacob's sibling #talbott winger #talbott winger x jacob's sibling #talbott winger x mc #jacob's sibling #jacob's sister #hufflepuff!mc #hufflepuff x ravenclaw #fluff

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rhys-writes-sometimes · 4 years ago

Text

Music Worth Making Part 4: The Hollywood Ghost Club

Requested: sort of

Warnings: mentions of death, bad writing

Series Summery: When the reader’s life is ripped away from them, they’re distraught. But with her two best friends and three certain ghosts, maybe the afterlife isn’t so bad after all.

Chapter Summery: The boys learn about Bobby, and drag you along to haunt him. They also drag you along to the Hollywood Ghost Club

Words: 4310

A/N: sorry this took so long, I didn’t write for a few days, and I didn’t expect this chapter to be so long. I think this is the longest fic I’ve ever wrote! please tell me if you catch any mistakes, because once again, i did not edit this. also please tell me (on anon or not!) if there is a trigger warning you want tagged. hope you enjoy! (side note: i did a little research and gentlefolk is in fact the gender neutral term for gentleman)

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 5 | Masterlist

______________________________________________________

“You’re…… a ghost,” Flynn said, her face morphing from confusion, to surprise, to something that looked like regret.

You nodded glumly.

“So that’s why you weren’t in school today? Because you died?” she shook her head. “I can’t believe this. I- I need a minute.” She ran out of the garage.

Your face fell out of the expression you didn’t realize you had been putting on for Flynn. Taking a deep breath, you sat down on the couch, not knowing what to do.

“Hey, Y/N, I-” Julie stopped when she saw you. “You okay?”

“Huh? Oh, oh yeah, I’m fine,” you lied. You could tell that Julie didn’t believe you, but she didn’t push. You were thankful. You didn’t even know what was off.

“Okay, well, I just wanted you to know that Danny’s staying in Carlos’s room now.”

“Really?” you asked, standing up. “Thank you Jules!” you went to hug the girl, but then remembered you were made of air.

“Yeah, no problem,” Julie said, trying to make what you had accidentally created a bit less awkward. “Well, I gotta go do homework. I guess that’s one perk to being dead, you don’t have to do school anymore.” She laughed a little as she waved goodbye.

That was true. You had a lot more freetime now. Maybe even time to sing?

Looking around to make sure no one was there, you closed your eyes and could practically hear the start of your favorite song. You started singing along, quietly at first, but soon you were belting it out at the top of your lungs and dancing all around the room, passing through the furniture that was in your way.

The song ended, and you smiled, happy for the first time in a while. Before you could continue on to the next song, your moment of bliss was interrupted.

“I didn’t know you could sing,” Luke said from his spot in the doorway. You jumped slightly. You had been so caught up in the music that you didn’t notice him watching you.

“Oh, sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you,” he said, stepping into the studio. “That was really good.”

You felt your face heating up. “Thanks,” you said quietly. It was the first time you had been complimented on your voice, never having the guts to sing anywhere outside of the school choir.

“Do you sing much?” he asked, moving to sit on the couch.

“Um, not really, no.” You sat next to him. “My parent’s wouldn’t let me. I only sang in the ensemble for the school choir.”

“Wow. That was amazing for someone who doesn’t sing much.” You felt yourself blush slightly. He smiled at you.

“Hey, um, would you wanna join the band?” he asked, fidgeting with his rings.

Your eyes widened. “Join- join Julie and the Phantoms? I, I’d be honored to, but what about Alex and Reggie?”

“What about them?”

“Well, shouldn’t they get a say in it? Julie too? I mean, it’s their band, too.”

Luke waved his hand dismissively. “I’m sure once they hear you sing, they’ll agree with me.”

You bit your lip. “Even if I did join, there’s a risk of someone recognizing me. How are you going to explain that the dead kid is singing on stage with Julie?”

“I’m not. Julie would explain that,” Luke smirked, earning a playful glare from you. “Seriously though, you could wear a disguise or something. I mean, you said you just moved here a few years ago and you’re pretty shy, so most people don’t know you, right?”

“Maybe….” You knew that someone was bound to recognize you, but decided that it was a problem for Future You to figure out. “Alright, I’ll join.”

Luke bounced up. “Yessss!” he exclaimed, pumping a fist in the air. You squeaked slightly when he pulled you into a tight hug. “Sorry,” he said, loosening his grip. You smiled at him, letting him know it was fine. “Welcome to the band.”

-----

“We’re playing a school dance? Sweet!” Reggie said, looking at the poster Julie had shown you.

“It’s not exactly the Strip,” Luke muttered, making you roll your eyes slightly.

“And you’re not exactly alive, so you should be happy we have our first gig,” Reggie retorted.

“I wasn’t in love with the idea at first either,” Julie admitted, “but it could be a great way for us to build a following, right?”

“Yeah, we need to play wherever we can, whenever we can,” you said, nodding at Julie.

She raised an eyebrow at you. “We?”

You felt your heart start to speed up as you realized you had accidentally told her you joined the band. Luckily, Luke saved you from having to explain yourself.

“Ye- yeah, we. I invited Y/N to join the band earlier. I hope that was okay,” he said, throwing an arm around your shoulders and hugging you to his side.

Julie nodded hesitantly. “It’s fine, I just wish you had asked us first.” Reggie nodded his agreement.

“I know, and I’m really sorry-” you started, but Julie cut you off.

“It’s fine, Y/N, really.” She smilied at you.

Luke smiled. “Let’s rock those kid’s faces off! And then play the clubs.”

“And then record a single that gets a billion streams?” you said hopefully.

“I don’t know what that is, but hopefully it gets us a manager and a tour,” Luke said with a smirk.

“And then we release a bunch of hit albums!” Julie said excitedly.

“Put out a country album that does surprisingly well.” You all stared at Reggie. “I shred on the banjo,” he shrugged.

“Then I’ll learn how to fiddle,” Julie said, fist bumping him.

“And before you know it, we’re being inducted into the Rock ‘n’ Roll Hall Of Fame!”

“But one of us isn’t there,” you said somewhat ominously. “Because we had a blow-out in 2032.”

“My money’s on Alex. He’s just so sensitive,” Reggie said, making you laugh slightly.

“What are we waiting for, let’s get rehearsing!” Luke said eagerly.

“Uh… where is Alex?” Julie asked just as he poofed back into the room.

“Oh, hey Alex. Where’ve you been?” you asked the drummer. He looked slightly out of breath, and had a faint glow of happiness to him.

“We need to start practicing,” Luke said, slightly annoyed.

“Yeah? For what?”

“Dance news!” Flynn called out as she walked in. “I don’t have a date. But I don’t care because I’m so psyched to see you guys perform.”

“Oh man, we’re playing a dance?” Alex asked, his disappointment evident in his voice.

“Of course dude. That’s how we get a following nowadays.” Luke sat in the chair behind him. You laughed quietly.

“Yeah, get with the program, Alex,” Julie laughed along with you.

“What? The guys are here? Hey guys!” Flynn waved in the wrong direction.

“Other way, sweetie,” you chuckled. “They’re sitting over here, with me.”

“Oh, yeah.” Flynn said quietly and waved in your direction. Reggie waved back.

“Okay, well, now that Alex has graced us with his presence, can we start working?” Luke asked, impatient.

“Yes! We’re gonna rehearse, you wanna stick around?” Julie asked Flynn, who frowned slightly.

“I’m supposed to blow up 500 balloons for the school dance, but this sounds way better.”

Just then, Carlos burst into the studio and accidentally walked through Alex. “Hey Julie! Remember those orbs in dad’s pictures? I…. I think they’re ghosts.”

You, Julie, and the guys all shared a look.

“But don’t worry,” Carlos continued, scanning the room. “This room is…. Is….” You sat forward slightly, waiting to hear his verdict. “This room is clear. I’m not getting the ghost tinglies.”

“Wrong again, little dude,” Reggie laughed.

“Have no fear. If they come back, I will protect you because I am the man of the house.”

You laughed. “Isn’t Ray supposed to be the man of the house?”

“Isn’t dad supposed to be the man of the house?” Julie asked, echoing you. You smirked.

Carlos crossed his arms. “There can be two,” he muttered, causing you to laugh again. “Dad needs all the help he can get, right?”

He held up a salt shaker. “According to the internet, this burns their souls out. A little sprinkle will keep them from ever coming in here.”

Your eyes widened with fear. It couldn’t possibly be true, could it? Taking no chances, you pulled your legs up into the chair you were sitting in as Carlos threw some salt your way.

“No!”Alex screamed as some salt hit him. “Nooo! Oh god, I’m…. I’m fine. I’m totally fine,” he said when nothing happened to him. You sighed in relief.

“Flynn, could you…?” you asked, nodding your head to indicate taking Carlos out of the studio. In times like these it was useful to be a ghost that only some people could see.

“Hey, Carlos, you know who’s hungry? Me,” she said, taking your hint. “Um, salt me a path to the kitchen.”

“Shall we try this again?” Julie asked once they were gone.

“Yes please, but remind us later. There’s some Sunset Curve songs that we wanna show you,” Luke said, standing up again.

“Oooo, show me now,” Julie said, pushing away her microphone.

“Yeah, okay!” Luke said, putting down his guitar and walking over to his journal. He took a paper out of it and read the title of the song: “‘Home Is Where My Horse Is’. Reggie, stop putting your country songs in my journal.”

“That was a gift,” Reggie said, winking at you.

“Thanks, buddy.” Ignoring Reggie as he tried to get Luke to look at the song, he walked over to Julie and handed her his journal. You walked over to look over her shoulder. “I dog-eared the ones I think you would slay.”

“Who’s Emily?” You asked, the name catching your eye as Julie flipped through the pages.

“That one’s not dog-eared,” Luke said, frantically trying to get the journal back. Julie held it to her chest. You mouthed “sorry” at him as he looked at you.

“‘If you could only know that I’d never let you go’,” Julie read out loud. “Wow Luke, I didn’t know you were such a romantic.”

“He’s not,” Alex said, walking over. “That one’s actually about-”

“No one.” Luke cut him off. “Uh, that’s just something that I tried…” Was it your imagination, or did his eyes flicker over to you? “B- but if you go to the next dog-eared page, I got a tune that’s just…. It’s got a killer beat.”

He started playing the song on his guitar. You tilted your head to the side, sure that you had heard the song before.

“So you wanna sample,” Julie spoke up, cutting Luke off. You realized where you had heard it before. It had been one of Rose’s favorite songs.

Luke scoffed. “What do you mean, ‘sample’?”

“Sample someone else’s music,” you chimed in.

“My mom and I used to sing that song at the top of our lungs in the car all the time.”

“It’s a classic Trevor Wilson song.”

Julie nodded, thankful that you knew what she was talking about.

“Nope.” Luke picked up his notebook. “It’s a classic our song.”

“Pure Sunset Curve,” Reggie said with a smile. “I’ve never even heard of Trevor Wilson.”

“Yeah, maybe you’re mixing it up, you know, with another song,” Alex said.

“Julie doesn’t mix up songs,” you said. “Trust me.”

“Yeah, me and his daughter used to be best friends. We used to hang out at their place all the time! I know that song.” You looked at Julie. Having moved to Los Angeles after Julie and Carrie stopped being friends, you forgot sometimes that they used to like each other.

“Here,” she said, pulling out her computer. “I’ll prove it.”

“His first album had a bunch of hits, but none of his later stuff is as good,” you said while Julie searched his name.

The boys gasped as she turned the computer around. You looked at her in confusion.

“That’s Bobby,” Luke said.

“Seriously? I just told you his name is Trevor,” you said, slightly concerned for his memory.

“Okay, so he changed it, alright? That’s definitely Bobby. He was our rhythm guitarist.” Alex spoke up. Reggie stood still, clearly in shock.

Julie scoffed. “Trevor Wilson was in your band?”

“I can’t get over how old he looks…” Reggie finally said.

“Oh, he looks like a substitute teacher,” Alex said in disgust.

You looked at Julie in confusion again. Sure, you had had a few bad substitutes, but you didn’t think it was enough to be an insult.

“Julie… what were his other hits?” Luke asked hesitantly.

“”Get Lost’.”

“Yeah. I wrote that.”

“‘Long Weekend’?”

“Yeah, Luke wrote that one too,” Reggie spoke up. You and Julie looked at him, the surprise evident on her face.

“‘Crooked Teeth’?”

“And that,” Alex said. “It was about Reggie.”

“What?” Reggie exclaimed, shocked and slightly hurt. “I thought that was about you! I don’t like that song anymore.” You held in a laugh.

“Wait… this is freaking me out. Trevor’s songs are kind of big to me,” Julie explained as Luke picked up some darts. “He’s the one who introduced me to rock.”

“Yeah, and Julie introduced me to rock using his music,” you said. You were freaking out a little too. You loved Trevor’s songs, so it was pretty weird to think that the ghosts standing in front of you had actually written them.

“Yeah, Luke introduced you to rock,” Alex scoffed.

“So this whole time, I thought you were connected to my mom. But instead, you’re connected to Carrie’s dad? Out of all the people, it had to be the one girl who had it out for me.”

“All right, well, add it to our list of questions,” you muttered.

“Back when Carrie and I were friends, the three of us used to talk about music all the time.” Julie looked at the guys. “He never mentioned you guys.”

“And that’s unbelievable!” Luke said, throwing another dart at the board. “He can take all the credit and he doesn’t even mention us?” Reggie shook his head slightly.

“And he’s rich,” you said. The boys all looked at you. “He has his own helicopter.”

“With his face on it,” Julie added.

“And he parks it in front of that hotel?” Reggie asked in shock.

“No. He gets to park it in front of his mansion.” You rolled your eyes.

“Mansion?” Reggie’s voice cracked.

“Dude, we live in a garage,” Alex spoke up.

“It’s not about the money, it’s about the music!” Luke said, but it sounded like he was trying to convince himself as much as anyone else.

“It’s a little bit about the money though!”

“A little bit about the money!”

“He could have shared it with our families! Maybe then my parents wouldn’t have had their house turned into a bike shack!”

“What he did is steal our legacy.”

You felt really bad for them. You couldn’t even imagine how it would feel if you had worked that hard on something, and then someone stole it.

Luke turned to Julie. “Where does he live.”

She sighed. “Above the beach in Malibu.

“Let’s go teach him a lesson,” Reggie said. The boy’s face was usually so kind and bouncy, but now it was stone cold.

“Wait, what? Guys! We have to rehearse for our dance! This is our first gig, and Y/N’s first time singing with us!” Julie said frantically, standing up.

Alex glanced at you in confusion, and you remembered you hadn’t told him yet about you joining the band.

Before you could say anything, however, Luke grabbed your hand and poofed out.

-----

“Bobby’s house is ridiculous!” Alex exclaimed as you looked around.

“Have you seen these platinum records?” you asked.

Reggie turned and looked at them. “Platinum?”

Luke was staring at a different set of records. “He recorded ‘My Name Is Luke’...” he muttered. “My name is Luke!”

Just then a man walked in wearing sunglasses and a leather jacket.

“It’s him!” Reggie said.

“Hey, Carrie! I’m gonna meditate!” Bobby called out.

“He wears sunglasses indoors,” Reggie said, disgusted.

“I’m in the den!” Carrie called out.

“Cool!” Bobby called out before going upstairs.

Reggie shook his head. “I can’t stand him!”

“Time for his past to haunt him,” Luke said, a scowl on his features.

He started up the stairs, with Reggie following him and you following a bit more hesitantly.

“Wait!” Alex called out, making you all turn around. “You know, it’s my…. It’s my first time haunting someone. I wanna make it special.”

You looked at him, confusion written on your face. “Okay, Alex,” you said before turning around and continuing up the stairs, Luke and Reggie joining you.

“Yeah, that was weird, okay,” you heard him mutter as he followed you.

You made your way into Bobby’s room, where he sat with candles lit.

“Agh!” you said as you felt another jolt of pain flair through your ankle. The boys looked at you, concerned. You shook your head to let them know you were fine. It was the weirdest thing, it’s like it flared up when it was the most inconvenient….

You watched the boys giggle as Luke gave Bobby a wet willy.

You and Alex snuck over to the candles, forgetting for a moment that no one could see you, and blew them out.

Reggie turned on the music player, which started playing a rock song. Bobby walked over and turned it off, but Reggie just turned it back on, causing Bobby to unplug it.

You hadn’t noticed Luke sneaking away, but he was gone when the shower turned on a moment later.

“Carrie?” Bobby asked. You giggled with the boys.

Bobby walked into the bathroom to see the shower running just as Luke turned it off. The mirror across from the shower was now foggy, and perfect for a ghost to write on.

“Ooo, Luke, you should write ‘Hello, Bobby’ on it!” you suggested through a fit of giggles. Reggie pointed at you to show his agreement.

Grinning, Luke wrote on the mirror in his best creepy handwriting, which also happened to be his best handwriting.

Bobby tried to run out of the bathroom, but Alex held the door shut.

“Let… Me…. Out!!” he shouted. Alex finally let go of the door and Bobby practically fell out of the room, causing all of you to laugh.

Luke grabbed your hand again and you poofed down to the patio just as Bobby was leaving. You watched as his helicopter flew over your heads.

“Oh! Quick, let’s moon him before he gets too far away,” Reggie said, causing you to roll your eyes.

“He can’t see us,” you reminded them.

“Oh it’s not for him, it’s for us,” Luke said as he pulled down his pants. You averted your eyes.

“So, did you guys have fun in there?” Julie asked, storming outside.

“Okay, you’d do the exact same if he stole all of your songs,” Luke defended them.

“But you guys have new songs. With me. The best way to get back at Trevor is for this band to do great. And to do great, we have to play at dances, then clubs-”

“And tours, I know.” Luke walked up to her. Julie still looked mad.

“I’ll see you guys at the school. We go on at nine. Please don’t be late. There’s gonna be a lot of people there.”

“We got it, alright? Don’t worry,” Alex said.

Julie sighed as she headed back inside.

“I don’t care what Julie says! I’m glad we scared Bobby,” Reggie said with a small grin. “We should’ve done more! Like… like written ‘thief’ on his forehead.”

“And Alex, how did you shut the door earlier? You could barely open a garage door,” you asked, confused.

Reggie looked at his friend, proud of him. “Learned that from your new friend Willie, didn’t ya?”

Alex blushed slightly. “Yeah, well, he taught me some things, we screamed in a museum…” he caught the look of confusion on your face. “It’s a long story.”

Luke smirked. “You think he has a few other tricks up his sleeve?”

“Let’s find out,” Alex said with a shrug.

-----

You landed near a beach, a boy on a skateboard coming to a stop in front of you.

“Hey, what’s up man?” he said to Alex, doing a short handshake. “You brought friends.”

“Yeah, these are my bandmates, Luke, Reggie, and Y/N.”

“Cool, I’m Willie. So, you guys here to learn some tricks?” He waved his hand in the direction of two police fourwheelers, making their sirens go off.

Reggie’s mouth hung open. “Do it again!”

“Actually, we were thinking a little bigger,” Luke said. “An old bandmate stole from us and we wanna confront him, face to face.”

“Alright, is this, uh, friend of yours a lifer?” Willie asked.

“Oh, that’s fancy ghost lingo for the living,” Alex said before you could ask. “Little something I picked up.”

You caught Willie smiling at Alex.

“Ah! Then yeah, he’s a lifer,” Reggie said, using the fancy ghost lingo he had just been taught. “Too much of a fancy-pants for street dogs.”

You snorted. “Wait, that’s how you guys died?” Julie had never told you, and you had just never discussed it with them.

“Uh, that’s not important-” Luke started to say, but Willie cut him off.

“Wait, you didn’t die with them?”

“Uh, no,” you said, trying to stop laughing. “Some guy killed me.”

Willie winced. “Ouch.” You nodded.

“Anyways,” Luke said, trying to get the conversation back on track. “Can you help us?”

“Yeah, I’m sorry,” Willie said, shaking his head. “Speaking to lifers is even out of my lead.” The guy’s faces fell. “You know, but there is one ghost who might be able to help you guys. He’s kind of a big deal…”

“Literally, anything would help,” Luke said.

“Oh, alright. Well, um, I gotta take care of some things, but I’ll meet you where Alex and I met, eight o’clock. See ya.” He skated away.

-----

“Right this way,” Willie said, leading you into a huge ballroom-type room.

“Whoa,” Luke muttered. “So this is where your hot-shot ghost lives, huh?”

“Yeah, we’ve walked past this hotel like, a million times. How come we’ve never heard of it?”Alex asked.

“That’s because this area has been sealed off for decades,” Willie said with a grin. “I mean, you wouldn’t even know this place exists unless you’re invited. Alright, I gotta go make sure everything’s cool, but I’ll be right back.” He turned and disappeared into the crowd.

You inhaled sharply as the pain in your ankle flared up again. Luke looked over at you, confused, and you pointed to your ankle. He nodded, understanding.

“‘The Hollywood Ghost Club’?” Reggie asked, oblivious to what had just happened between you and Luke. “Man, this place is creepy.”

“Yeah, well, so are we.” Alex smiled.

“I don’t know about this,” you muttered.

“Well, if you get scared, you can always hide behind me,” Alex said. “I’ll be hiding behind Luke.”

“You guys need to grow up, okay?” Luke said as Alex moved behind him. “We’re gonna get back at Bobby. He needs to pay for what he did to us.”

“Yeah.” Alex said. Then he whispered to you: “I’m still gonna hide behind him.”

Just then, Willie came back. “We’re all good!” he said with a smile.

“Oh, uh, cool,” Alex said, flustered. “Hey, just so you know, we have like, an hour. We’ve got a gig with Julie.”

“Oh yeah, no worries.”

“Cool.”

“Let’s go.”

You all walked down the stairs, taking in all the fancy clothing people were wearing. Well, the four of you walked. Willie slid down the railing.

“I think we’re a little overdressed,” Luke said. You smirked.

Suddenly a woman walked through Alex.

“Whoa! I thought these people were all going to be ghosts,” Reggie said.

“Nope. These are all lifers.” Willie gestured to the entirety of the club.

“Oh, uh, lifers are actually-”

“Alive people, I was listening,” Reggie said, cutting off Alex with a smirk.

“But this is a very exclusive crowd. Everybody here has uh, paid a lot to get a sneak peak at the afterlife.”

“I always knew rich people did weird stuff like this,” Reggie muttered, making you laugh.

A ghost appeared behind you.

“Gentleman, my lady,” he stopped and looked at you a moment. “I have a table for you.” Your heart sank as he misgendered you, but you didn’t correct him.

“Oh, uh, Y/N here is actually non-binary,” Luke said. You beamed at him.

“My apologies, gentlefolk. Right this way.”

You followed him to a reserved table in the front, right in front of the stage.

Luke pulled out a chair for you to sit. You blushed. You also squealed internally when you noticed Willie do the same for Alex.

“Okay, so who’s gonna make us visible so we can confront our old bandmate?” Luke asked Willie once everyone was seated. You looked around in wonder at the club.

“Oh, no, no. None of these lifers have the power to do that.” Dramatic music started to play out of nowhere. You thought you recognized the melody, although you couldn’t quite place it. “Oh, but here comes the ghost who does!”

“Ladies and gentleman,” boomed a voice from nowhere and everywhere at the same time, “back from the dead by popular demand, Caleb Covington!”

Willie cheered along with the rest of the club’s members as a man appeared floating above the stage.

“Did you miss me?” he asked.

You gasped, your eyes widening.

“What?” Luke asked you. “What’s wrong?”

You turned to him with fear in your eyes. “That’s him.”

“Who?”

“The man who killed me.”

tag list: @sunsetcurvej @ifilwtmfc @xplrreylo @phantompogues @caitsymichelle13 @yagorlemmalyn

#jatp #jatpfic #jatp fic #julie and the phantoms #julie and the phantoms fic #fanfiction #luke x reader #luke patterson x reader #x reader #jatp x reader #julie and the phantoms x reader #rhys writes sometimes #music worth making series

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thoughtsaboutshows · 4 years ago

Note

51. “Gimme cuddles.” “Fuck off.” :)

Finally got this one done! Sabrina has some insecurities and Prudence tries to help. Warning, convos about sex ahead.

“Ugh could you please figure your shit out with my cousin so he leaves me alone?” Sabrina complained as she stormed into the Sanctum and threw herself on the couch next to Prudence.

Prudence eyed her annoyingly over her ancient text and prayed to Hecate if she just ignored Sabrina Spellman that she’d just go away. No such luck.

“Oh please have a seat.” Prudence answered sarcastically and gestured to the spot next to her that Sabrina was already sprawled on. Sabrina was huffing and puffing and her face was a shade of red that Prudence had never seen before. She knew she wasn’t going to get out of whatever rant Sabrina was about to spew if she tried. So she bit the bullet and took the bait Sabrina was so obviously laying out there. “What ever is on your mind, Sabrina?”

“It seems Ambrose can get any so he’s made it his purpose to pry into my sex life.” Sabrina grumbled and crossed her arms.

“Who says your cousin isn’t, as you so eloquently put it, getting any.” Prudence’s smile was sly, and she saw the exact moment that it clicked into place in Sabrina’s mind. A scrunched up disgusted look made its way across her face as Sabrina came to the conclusion that Prudence and her cousin were in fact sleeping together. Despite the fact it was what she asked for, Sabrina was also certain she didn’t want to know the sordid details.

“Great so you’re back together. Could you tell him to leave me alone?” Prudence laughed at that and finally closed and set down the book she then realized she was done reading because Sabrina wasn’t going anywhere.

“What did he say?” Prudence asked her, curious as to what had her so riled up. It was clear as day when Nick and Sabrina had finally had sex. Even without their disgustingly dazed and loving eyes they sent each other before the merge, Prudence could tell by the way Sabrina shifted awkwardly on her feet when she walked that something had gone on when Nick quickly teleported over after being summoned by her.

“He keeps in insinuating that all Nick and I do lately is have sex.”

“Well don’t you?” Prudence asked with a laugh. She figured that once Sabrina had gotten a taste of what it was like to be with Nick it made sense that the two were always running off somewhere. But it also could have something to do with the fact that Sabrina had nearly died and the echoes and moans of the bedroom were their battle cry of victory.

“No, Prudence, we don’t!” Sabrina cried but then bit her lip when Prudence raised her eyebrows. She took a deep breath and then shrugged, her face blushing even redder with embarrassment. “Okay maybe lately we’ve been pretty active. But I nearly died for Hecate’s sake.”

“Then what’s the issue, Sabrina?” Prudence asked her. She knew Sabrina was half mortal, but never quite understood her embarrassment when it came to sex.

“The issue, is I don’t want to be one of those couples where all they do is have sex.” Sabrina admitted. “I want us to have real meaningful connection, and do other real meaningful things.” Prudence raised her eyebrows at Sabrina who scrunched her nose and then added. “And have sex too of course.”

“You don’t think you and Nicky have a connection?” The insecurity bubbling out of Sabrina Spellman was almost laughable. Prudence had known Nicholas Scratch for a long time, and she’d never seen him be as devoted to anyone else as he was to Sabrina.

“No, I know we do. I know we love each other. I guess I just…”. Sabrina trailed off trying to find where the issue is.

“You guess you want to make sure the emotional connection doesn’t fade away in between your sighs and cries for more in the bedroom.” Prudence filled in for her after taking a quick peek into her mind.

“That’s one way to put it but yeah that’s about right.” Sabrina grumbled but then bit her lip sheepishly. “He’s just so damn irresistible most of the time.”

“Oh I know.” Prudence smirked and Sabrina rolled her eyes. She had seen more than once how irresistible Prudence knew Nick could be. It was all in the past now, but that didn’t mean Prudence didn’t like to ruffle Sabrina’s feathers with the memory. “And by the way he looks at you I assume he find you impossible to resist too.”

“How does he look at me?” Sabrina tilted her head to the side and asked her, apparently completely unaware of how Nick’s hungry gaze had been honed in on her since day one in that damn choir room.

“Um I don’t know like he couldn’t give two shits about who’s in the room and he’s a nod from you away from ripping your skirt off and fucking you at any given point in the day.” Prudence was blunt. It was perfectly normal for witches and warlocks to be deeply sexual, to enjoy the passionate romp at a moment's notice. Nick had transitioned, however, from the anyone and anytime to being inherently focused on one witch for the rest of time.

“Prudence!” Sabrina sneered in a whisper. There weren’t any other people in their corner of the Sanctum, but hidden familiars lingered and she swore after one too many lectures by Zelda that the books had ears. “He does not.” She tried to deny what Prudence was saying but found herself faltering. She found it hard to deny too that she looked at Nick in any other way. Prudence didn’t have to do anything more than raise her eyebrows to get Sabrina to recant. “Okay maybe he does...but how do I resist him Prudence?”

“Well let’s practice. I’ll be Nicky, you be you.” Prudence cleared her throat and whispered a few Latin words and the next words out of her mouth came out in Nick’s dreamy tone. The one that was sweet and savory at the same time, a little scratchy but smooth as honey. “Hey, Spellman. Give me cuddles.” Prudence slid closer and wrapped her arm around her shoulder. Sabrina tensed, weirded out by hearing Nick’s voice come out of Prudence’s mouth. She leaned even closer and whispered in her ear. “Or give me something else.”

“Oh my Hecate. Fuck off, Prudence!” Sabrina shoved her away, certain Prudence sounding like Nick would haunt her nightmares for centuries to come.

Prudence burst out in laughter and expected Sabrina to bolt. But she stayed where she was, arms crossed and head shaking. Prudence slid closer again, but didn’t touch her and returned her voice to its typical state.

“Why do you need to resist him?” Sabrina originally narrowed her eyes but she relaxed when she saw Prudence’s genuine confusion in her eyes. “You’re finally having sex, and good sex at that. There is nothing wrong with enjoying each other. Doesn’t your mortal moral compass say you should have sex with people you love anyways? I don’t see the issue.”

Sabrina took a deep breath and turned to Prudence, letting her insecurities fall into place as she considered how to word them.

“Nick’s had sexual relationships in the past, where sex is all it was. And I don’t have a problem with that, truly. There’s nothing wrong with that.” Sabrina held up her hands and Prudence believed her. “But I want Nick and me to be different. I don’t want sex to be all we are.”

“Sabrina.” Prudence told her and the softness that Sabrina knew existed in the girl was shining through. She brushed Sabrina’s hair back in a gentle way and tilted her head to the side. “You and Nicky are not and have never nor will you ever be just about sex. Take it from someone who has been with him both before and after he fell in love with you that he is never going back to that. Maybe it took you guys a minute to get there. But from where I’m standing I don’t see any other outcome than the two of you grossing us out with your love for the rest of our lives.”

Sabrina smiled and nodded, swallowing once before sitting up straight and looking at Prudence again.

“Thanks, Prudence. I guess I get caught up in my head sometimes.”

“I think you should talk to Nick.” Prudence gestured with her head to the door. “If you need to dial back the physical you need to tell him. And he’ll do it. He’d-”

“Do anything for me, I know.” Sabrina bit her lip, knowing how true that statement was. Memories of a masquerade ball flooding her mind. “I don’t know that I need to dial it back…”. Prudence smirked, knowing that wasn’t really what Sabrina wanted at all.

“You just need to know that if you did, he’d stick around.” Prudence finished and Sabrina smiled slightly.

“I’m gonna go find him.”

Sabrina and Prudence nodded at each other one more time, a small gesture of understanding. They were friends. They wouldn’t be having sleepovers anytime soon, but they both had another person in their corners.

Sabrina set out from the Sanctum in search of him, knowing around this time he’d be getting home from wrestling practice at Baxter High and be hopping in the shower soon.

Sure enough when she knocked on his door and walked in before getting his response he was there, shirtless with shorts hung low on his hips and the shower on in the background.

They didn’t spend a lot of time in his room at the Academy, typically ending the night in Sabrina’s bedroom with her essentially forbidding him from leaving her. Not that he wanted to anyways, always holding her close ever since she’d nearly died on that sacrificial altar.

“Spellman!” Nick said surprisingly but with a smile. Sabrina pressed down the recent memory of Prudence’s face saying that name with his voice. “I thought I was seeing you later.”

“You complaining?” Sabrina quirked an eyebrow up in teasing and he playfully rolled his eyes, crossing the room to her in seconds.

“Of course not, babe.” He leaned in, placing his hand on her shoulder and kissed her cheek. His hand slid down her arm to grab her hand. “What’s up?”

“Can we talk?” Sabrina heard the way her voice wavered. Nick’s worried brows told her he picked up on her nervousness too. He used his hand in hers to pull her to his bed where they both sat.

“What’s going on, Spellman.” Nick used his other hand to brush some of her curls back as his other rubbed circles on her palm.

“Nick, what would you do if I told you I wanted to have less sex?”

Nick’s face contorted in multiple emotions: confusion, worry, and finally it transitioned to fear.

“Sabrina did I do something that made you uncomfortable? Did I hurt you?” He was rambling, trying to figure out what line he crossed. “I’m so sorry, I never meant.”

“Nick.” She grabbed his face to get him to stop. Her small smile only calmed him a bit. “You didn’t do anything. I just want to know what you would do.”

“Then I’d say we’d have less sex.” Nick said slowly, still confused. “Spellman, what is this about?”

“You wouldn’t leave?” Sabrina raised her eyebrows. She already knew the answer, knew he’d never leave her. But that didn’t always stop the insecurity. Nick grabbed her face now, and stared intently into her eyes, his gaze and intensity never wavering.

“I will never ever leave you. You are the love of my life. I meant it when I said you were it for me, that I’d wait for however long it took. I’m going to be here, by your side, until our very last day. And even after that, I’m not going anywhere.” He brought her face close to his then to kiss her in a way that eradicated any doubts. “I love you.”

“I love you too, Nick.” She kissed him again, deep and soft.

“Can I ask where this all came from?” Sabrina bit her lip and looked away for a moment.

“Ambrose teased me for all the sex we’ve been having. It made me insecure for a second that we were losing what makes us us.” She reached up and brushed his curls delicately, admiring each one.

“Sabrina, the sex we have is incredible.” His smug smile made him blush. “But it’s the fact that it’s with you that makes it that way. And if you need to dial it back, that’s okay.”

“I didn’t say that was what I wanted…”. She told him as she began to trace her fingers over his bare chest. His skin felt illuminated by her touch, as if her fingers unlocked his nerve cells one by one.

“How about I take you to dinner and a movie this weekend?” He suggested, closing his eyes as her fingers reached his abdomen. “I can even kiss you goodbye on the porch and walk away like a good boy.”

Sabrina stopped her movements at the suggestion.

“A date sounds lovely.” She began moving again, toying with the waistband of his shorts. “But if you think you’re kissing me goodbye and coming back here then you’re not as smart as I thought you were.”

“So what’s the verdict then?” Nick asked her, finally leaning down to kiss the junction of her neck. “Less sex?”

“No.” Sabrina whispered as her hand wandered to his back now, tracing its dip and moving up to scratch his shoulders. “No more letting Ambrose’s dumb comments rattle me. You rattle me instead.”

He paused his work on her neck and she nearly hissed when he pulled away to look at her, face flushed from the blood pumping through his body.

“I was about to shower before you showed up.” Nick stated and then lifted his hand to play with the flimsy straps of her top. “Join me?”

Sabrina stood, dragging him to stand too and wasting no time discarding her clothes and pulling him to the steamy bathroom.

“I thought you’d never ask.”

#nabrina #sabrina spellman #nicholas scratch #otp prompts #post part 4 where no one dies #Sabrina and Prudence are real friends

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freckledacademic · 4 years ago

Text

hello everyone!

i had someone request a breakdown of what my medical school/MSTP application looked like, so here we go!

FIRST - a disclaimer! this is my application, and it worked for me. it doesn’t look like the application of my classmates and other medical school friends who also got in. one of my friends got a below average MCAT, but her clinical experience and extracurriculars meant she got into (and is going to!) a highly-ranked medical school. on the other hand, my application was weighted fairly heavily in the direction of academics, since that’s my strength!

also, keep in mind i was applying to medical scientist training programs with the goal of getting an MD/PhD -- my app is also pretty research heavy

onto the specifics!

general

i went to a small liberal arts college with a focus on research. nearly every student does a senior thesis, and science senior theses usually involve lots of lab work/data generation done by the student.

i double-majored in mathematics and biochemistry & molecular biology, and between those classes, gen eds, and music, i was generally over full-time but just under the credit limit per semester.

i took the MCAT in May of 2018, and applied that summer. my AMCAS was in July 9th, and I got approved ~August 10th. this was between my junior (17-18) and senior (18-19) years. i matriculated at my med school in july of 2019.

numbers

GPA - 3.97 (ish? i got two A-s, and everything else was As)

MCAT - 519 (130 on three sections, 129 on one. i don’t remember which one though whoops)

clinical experience

shadowing - shadowed with two different doctors - an oncologist over the course of a semester, and a clinical pathologist for a day. total # of hours - relatively low, maybe 15-25.

clinical volunteering - i volunteered at a free clinic near my college for one afternoon every week or so during most of junior spring and senior year. total # of hours - ~60 hrs

medical ethics program - related to the longitudinal oncology shadowing. once a month, throughout the spring semester of my junior year, we would meet to discuss articles we’d been assigned to read on a topic eg: end of life care, malpractice, etc. total # of hours - ~10 hrs

research experience

research assistant, yeast genetics lab - i worked in this lab during the spring of my first year and during the summer after. it was my first lab/research experience, and it taught me a lot regarding lab techniques and lab mentality. garnered me my one and (still) only publication! total # of hours - 400+ hrs

research assistant, computational biology lab - i worked (and went on to do my senior thesis) in this lab during my junior year. it was partially an excuse to get started with my thesis coding early, because it was going to take a lot of time, but it also helped me get acquainted with my thesis advisor! total # of hours - ?

research intern, cancer research center - this was an internship i applied for that was specifically for students with a year left in college that occurred the summer between my junior and senior year. i worked with a biostatistician on developing a machine-learning model to predict disease risk based off of demographic data. i learned a lot about R, statistics, and regression models. i also learned that i don’t like R, statistics, and machine learning models lmao. note: this didn’t technically go in my AMCAS iirc, because i applied while i was *at* the internship. i did talk about it at interviews!

senior thesis - this was another thing that wasn’t in my app itself, because at the time it hadn’t been written lmao. it was something i was able to talk about at interviews, but it being ~still in progress~ did complicate it

on-campus jobs

peer tutor - got recommended by a professor my first year for a different tutoring program, but my schedule was a mess so i ended up as a one-on-one peer tutor! i really enjoyed it, but i had to drop it with how busy i got junior year, so i only did it for two years (freshman spring --> junior fall). total # of hours - 210 hrs

laboratory course TA, cell biology - again, got asked by a professor to do this. specifically TA’d 2/3 sections junior fall, and then 1/2 or 1/3 sections every semester after that. also held office hours, maintained longitudinal lab experiments, and supervised students performing experiments. total # of hours - 800 hrs (TAing this class was absurd and i did it for four semesters)

extracurriculars

collegiate choir member - i adore singing, and part of the reason i went to the college i did was so i could still partake in music while pursuing a science degree. i was a part of my school’s auditioned choir for all four years at my school, and it involved 1h15m practices 4 days a week, regular concerts, and an annual spring tour. total # of hours - 500 hrs

chorus manager - i was a manager of the chorus as well for three years (sophomore through senior). i was very much in charge of the organization - making sure everyone had uniforms, that those uniforms were on for concerts and that everyone was wearing shoes. shepherding people on trips, solving problems, taking attendance, etc. etc. total # of hours - 250 hrs

i also took voice lessons, though i don’t think i put that down on my app? iirc there’s a limit to how many activities you can add?

other

honor societies

Phi Beta Kappa - general undergrad honor society, inducted junior year

Mu Alpha Theta - mathematics honor society, inducted sophomore year

Beta Beta Beta - biology honor society, inducted sophomore (?) year

awards

Barry Goldman scholarship - honorable mention

Dean’s List - all 8 semesters

various prizes specific to my undergrad

academic merit scholarship, minor voice scholarship

------------

to sum it all up....

i think the pros of my application include a strong academic presence, proof of my interest in research, and the existence of significant interests outside the STEM pathway - namely, music!

i think the major con of my application was a really weak clinical experience section, tbh. i also feel like some schools on the other side of the country from my undergrad like. hadn’t heard of it lmaooo.

everyone’s application will be different!! and that’s good, and okay, and you’ll be fine. you want to think about the things that make you you, and potentially the things that reflect on the kind of doctor that you’d like to be.

#medical school #med school #med school advice #medblr #freckled talks #studyblr #academics unite #academicsunite #medical school applications #whooooop this took me like an hour to write up. what a thrilling tour of my college resume lmao

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brandyllyn · 4 years ago

Text

In our own image... (24)

Chapter 24

(Poe Dameron x OFC)

Other chapters... My Masterlist

Word count: 2400. Read it on AO3.

Rating: Teen & Up (PG) language. canon typical violence.

It was a detour. Nothing more. A quick stop on Garos to pick up some intel for the General before they returned to base. Not only that, but they had a lead on a Chasinian in town that Kina was desperate to look into. Just a quick detour.

There was only one problem.

"Maker, just take him with you," Finn sighed.

Kina glared at him, the warmth from Poe’s chest a constant presence behind her. "People are going to think I’m some weird slave owner."

"Can you ask him to just… be normal?" Rey offered.

Kina turned to Poe, considering him. The adoration coming from his eyes was pure and true and still, even after a full day of it, absolutely horrifying. Seeing his face so blank, everything in him replaced by what the Choir had done to him. She had thought that she would get used to it - or that being around his friends might make him snap out of it just a little. But he continued to have eyes only for her.

It was like being granted a wish in the worst way possible.

She had at least managed to convince him that the voice of the translator was her voice - even if he struggled to think of it as her. "Poe, can you stay with me and just… not talk? Especially not call me mistress?"

"I can do that mistress," he replied eagerly and Kina pinched the bridge of her nose. When she looked back she saw that his eyes were wide, "I’m sorry mis- I’m sorry. I won’t. I can do that for you. I would do anything for you."

"Chasī sometimes I wish I were a worse person," she whistled low enough that the translator cuff missed it. "Okay," she whistled louder, "I’m going to look into the rumors of a Chasinian, you three are going to get the intel for General Organa?"

"We’ll meet back here at sundown," Chewie said, slinging his crossbow onto his shoulder. Kina frowned at it. This was a peaceful planet, there was no reason to think he would need that. "It’s just in case," he said, noticing her concern. "Would you prefer I go with you?"

"No, it’s fine," Kina assured him. "We’ll be fine."

They most assuredly were not fine. Just, not in the way that a blaster would have helped.

Poe wouldn’t stop touching her. His hand on her waist, or her arm. Twirling bits of her hair around his fingers whenever she stopped to ask for directions. Once, someone shoved her back into him and she felt his arms wrap around her, his face press into her neck.

"Mistress you-"

"No." She spun on him, pressing one finger to the center of his chest. "No. Bad Poe."

His crestfallen expression broke her heart and she sighed before holding her hand out to him, guiding him along to the next stall. Soon enough he was gliding his thumb across the backs of her fingers, making small humming noises to himself.

This was torture.

Sweet Chasī what had she done to deserve this? This man who she had fallen half in love with before wrenching herself away for their own good. Who she had started to dream of a bright and wonderful future with. What had she done to deserve the torture of his touch and know that he hadn’t consented to it?

She cursed, reminding herself that this wasn’t him. But it was hard when she wasn’t looking at him. When he wasn’t calling her mistress. Hard to remember when his voice was low and pleading and he smelled just as nice as before. When his hands felt just as nice on the small of her back, their fingers slipping onto her bare skin and-

"Have you seen," she squeaked out the last word, jumping at the brush of Poe’s skin on hers. She glared at him sharply and he dropped the hand immediately. Turning back to the merchant she smiled. "Have you seen someone who looks like me?" She gestured at her rosettes.

"Sounds like Parrin, two streets over. Sells fruit."

Kina breathed a deep sigh of relief. "Thank you."

When they arrived at the stall Kina sighed. If you squinted a little, she supposed she could see how you might mistake the man at the fruit stall for a Chasinian. Or if you squinted a lot. He was humanoid, and he did have facial markings although his were obviously tattoos and a completely different design.

He also had three eyes and a set of tusks.

"I’ll take five of those," Kina pointed at the bunches of berries and sighed again to herself. She’d known it was a long shot that there was a Chasinian exactly where they needed to land. But there was still something fundamentally disappointing about having it verified. She took the fruit when the man offered it and barely noticed when Poe immediately took it from her.

She did notice when he held one of the berries up to her lips with a hopeful smile.

"Oh for fuck’s sake," Kina leaned forward and took the fruit, trying to ignore how happy the gesture made him. "No," she said when he reached for another. "No more."

He seemed unperturbed, wrapping her hand in his and smiling to himself as they made their way through the crowds. When they got back to the Falcon she sent him up the ramp ahead of her, stopping to lean against a pile of crates and take a deep breath.

"You’re back early too?"

Rey’s voice shook Kina out of her momentary daze. She was just ahead of Chewie and Finn, the former seemingly trying to teach some Shyriiwook to the latter.

"I got back just after you," Kina replied, gesturing at the open ramp of the Falcon.

She saw the other woman’s brows draw together. "We just got here."

Together, they all turned to the Falcon. And the ramp that should not, by any reasonable estimation, be down.

"I just sent Poe up there," Kina whistled softly, taking a step forward but Rey’s hand stopped her.

"We don’t know what’s going on."

"I have to-" Kina started to say, prying at Rey’s fingers but the woman’s grip was tight.

"We have to figure out what’s going on. Chewie?"

"Pirates," he growled and Kina’s eyes went wide.

"What?"

"What!"

All three voices stumbled over each other at Chewie’s words and the Wookie shrugged as he unslung his crossbow. "I’ll go check it out."

"Not alone," Finn started and Rey shook her head again.

"No one is going in there until we have more information. Beebs?"

BB-8 spun at her feet. "I will see Friend Rey." Before Kina could say anything the droid was gone, darting up the ramp.

Kina grabbed Rey’s arm, "What are you doing, he could be killed."

"What do you mean?" Rey gave her a confused look.

Kina sighed, now was not the time for this argument either. It was never the time. But she held her breath until she saw the droid return. "I could not find Friend Poe. Only strangers."

"How many strangers Beebs?" Rey asked.

"I saw four only," the droid replied.

"Were they armed?"

"Yes Friend Rey. And they were talking about taking the Friend Falcon."

"Pirates," Chewie growled again.

Rey took a deep breath, "Chewie, you go onboard and get to the cockpit. See if you can get us in the air. I don’t want them getting reinforcements. Finn, BB says there are four strangers onboard with weapons." The man nodded and Kina saw Rey unholster the lightsaber at her side. She’d only ever seen Rey using it in trainings.

This was not how she imagined seeing it in real use.

"We stick together as much as possible. Kina, I can block blaster fire with this but only if I’m between you and the bolt." Rey continued.

"Rey you don’t have to-" Kina started but Rey cut her off.

"You’re the only one without a weapon," she pointed out curtly.

Kina nodded. "We have to find Poe."

"We’ll do that first," Rey assured her and Kina breathed a sigh of relief.

The slow journey up the ramp was nerve-wracking. It wasn’t until Chewie motioned them forward that Kina felt herself relax even a little.

"Finn, BB-8, go with Chewie," Rey pointed to the right and two slipped off with the Wookie. "Where did you send Poe?" She asked Kina in a low whisper.

"To the-" Kina winced, hand going to her translator and turning the volume down. "To the commons. We bought some food, I told him to put it away."

Rey nodded, slinking around the corridor to the left with Kina close behind. This was the wrong way. Kina pulled on Rey’s arm and the woman shushed her with a finger across her lips. Kina glared but kept silent.

They met the first pirate in the cargo bay. Rey saw him first and she was on him from one heartbeat to the next. She never even turned on her lightsaber. One minute he was standing and the next she was dragging him behind a stack of crates, unconscious.

Kina knew her eyes must be as big as saucers when Rey returned but the woman just motioned her forward. There was no one else in the cargo bay, Rey and Kina making their way quietly though it before stopping at the bulkhead.

"Is there any way to open that that isn’t going to be disastrously loud?" Kina asked.

Rey shook her head, hands already moving. "Stay behind me. I know you can take someone hand to hand so if there is anyone unarmed I’m leaving them to you."

Kina nodded and braced herself, but the door slid open with no one on the other side. They both peered cautiously around, stepping into the storage repair bay.

"I know you’re there, why don’t you come say hi?"

Kina met Rey’s eyes. Beneath their feet, they felt the Falcon’s engines rumble to life.

"Come out or I’ll shoot him," the unfamiliar voice called again, still conversational.

"Poe," Kina whistled softly and took a step forward but once again Rey held her back. Stepping around the edge of the wall and into the doorway to the crew common area.

"This ship is not yours."

"Well that seems to be a matter of opinion right now doll."

Kina felt something bump her feet. K-0, looking up at her expectantly. She dropped to one knee. "K-0, my friend. Will you help?"

"Will help," the droid said immediately.

"I can’t guarantee it’s safe," she cautioned.

"Will help," the droid said again, more firmly. Kina nodded at them.

"Can you cause a distraction?"

K-0 nodded at her and then darted between Rey’s legs. Kina couldn’t see, but heard K-0’s repeated calls of "Bad man. No touch Poe."

"What the hell- get this thing off me." The deep voice came back.

Rey shrugged. "It does what it wants. And it doesn’t like how you’re treating my friend."

Kina took the opportunity to slip up into the vents, shifting the metal plating and lifting herself with the barest hint of noise. She moved as quickly as she could until she was over the commons. Now she could see what they were up against.

She wished she hadn’t.

There were two people in there, a man and woman. The man had Poe on his knees, a blaster pressed firmly to the back of his neck. He was kicking out at K-0 and cursing. The woman, for her part, seemed amused.

"What, can’t handle one little droid?" she taunted.

"I’ll fucking handle it alright," the man replied, moving his blaster for just a moment to aim for the droid.

Everything seemed to happen at once.

Rey’s lightsaber came on and she darted into the room.

Kina swung herself down onto the dejarik table.

A blaster shot went off.

Kina tackled the woman, noting correctly that Rey went straight for the man holding Poe. She knocked the woman to the ground and the woman’s blaster went sliding across the floor. Rather than go for it like Kina expected, the woman turned on her, kicking her in the jaw even as Kina scrambled to hold her still. She reeled back and then lunged forward, barely aware of the fight behind her.

But she did feel Poe. Felt his arms wrap around her and pull her behind him. Pull her to something resembling safety except now the woman had time to move. Time to crawl across the floor and palm her blaster and turn on them and-

A loud zap filled the air and the woman’s eyes went wide, she fell to her side with a cry of pain.

"Bad Stranger," BB-8 whistled darkly before tasing her again.

"Stop it you fucking piece of scrap," the woman snarled, turning her blaster on BB-8. Kina lunged at her. At the same time Poe leapt across BB-8, pushing the droid to the side and crumpling inward when the blaster went off.

Kina screamed but the noise was drowned out by a loud roar filling the commons. Seven and a half feet of Wookie had arrived and he was pissed. Chewie picked the woman grappling with Kina up in one hand, slamming her into the wall and then to the floor. Finn was right behind him, a roll of electrical tape in his hands and he knelt and began tying the woman up, his eyes on Poe.

"Kina-"

"I see him," she bit out, scrambling over the metal towards Poe and turning him over. There was a harsh, gaping red line along his side. The tissue bloody and raw and Kina’s hands hovered over him helplessly.

BB-8 was spinning wildly. "Friend Poe no," the droid whistled.

She vaguely heard Rey drop to her knees next to her, saw her reach out and lay her hand on Poe’s chest. Kina couldn’t stop the tears, cradling Poe’s head and touching his face but his eyes were drifting shut. "Don’t you dare die on me Poe Dameron," she warned.

"Hey, it’s okay. I get it." Poe reached up with one hand and touched her face, then turned and smiled at Rey and reached towards BB-8. "I get it now. Loyalty right? It’s…" he trailed off, his hand falling limp to his chest. His eyes were staring past them. "It’s… it’s getting dark… I don’t…"

Next to her, Kina saw several of BB-8’s tool disc bays open.

The room went ablaze with light.

Chpt25

#poe dameron #poe dameron x ofc #poe dameron / ofc #star wars sequels #star wars fanfiction

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butterflyinthewell · 4 years ago

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Dad took some steps today. He needed the therapist right there because he was so off balance that he would’ve fallen without support along with his walker. One of his feet is curling sideways and inward because he hasn’t been putting weight on his feet. That will be a problem and he may need a brace to straighten that out. It’s related to the whole “don’t use it and you lose it” aspect of Parkinson’s disease, and I was afraid of this.

I hope he gets to walk again as much as he could before because he will be stuck in one room for the rest of his life if he doesn’t. I think that’s the one incentive that makes him want to get back on his feet. My fear is he will then proceed to get up at night like he was doing when he got hurt in the first place. He still keeps mom awake till 3 and 4am because she’s a people pleaser who will give until she’s dead. Black hole people like my dad love finding bleeding hearts like my mom.

I’ve told mom to just put her foot down and go to bed, but I stayed up once to see what really happens. Dad whines and complains if mom says she’s going to bed. Suddenly he will want to be put on his bedside commode (which takes forever and then you wait for him to go and heave him back into bed), or he will want a sandwich or just anything that makes mom have to be busy on his behalf until she’s wide awake again when she was sleepy enough for bed before.

Just...AUGH...every good thing always comes with shit right behind it.

I think I’m going to ask my counselor or psychiatrist if there’s a way to screen for ptsd. My mental health is in the toilet and I’m having bizarre dreams and nightmares several times a week. My sleep is disrupted now, and that’s never been a thing for me. I’m constantly hyper vigilant. I’m having anger outbursts and the kinds of thoughts that intrude upon my mind are horrible.

If something happens to mom, I am helpless in all the issues that matter. Food, I can figure out, but I’m worse than useless for everything else. I cannot move dad to his commode or wheelchair, and he needs some support to move onto them. I’m too small, he outweighs me by over 100 pounds.

Most of my bad dreams are things happening to my mom, or there’s word that something happened and I can’t get any info on if she’s okay or not. Another kind I have is I’ve contracted COVID, or someone who comes in to see us has it and spreads it, and I’m the only survivor. Other dreams are the body horror type where I amputate my own body parts with a saw and hand them to people because I feel useless. I had one recently where I literally ran up to Hannibal Lecter with a knife and fork and told him to eat me, but he took the silverware away and wouldn’t do it because “no, you’re not rude.” I said I was, but he wouldn’t do it. I was so angry! I was angry about that dream all day!

I don’t believe I deserve anything good and I don’t see myself as a good person. I don’t deserve help.

I’m scared a lot. Just...I can be sitting here watching a cute kitten video on YouTube or eating dinner and get hit with a wave of fear.

None of this is how my mind usually works. I’ve never been in mortal danger(recently), but I’ve had my routines and life disrupted to such severe degrees that I feel like I’ve lost control of my life, and to me that’s almost the same thing as dying. I’m autistic, and autistic people are more prone to trauma from ‘mundane’ things that a neurotypical person wouldn’t flinch at.

I’m just worried the “not life-threatening” aspect will immediately disqualify a diagnosis.

In June 2019, I went into burnout after home health visits for dad threw all my routines away and they’re still getting destroyed by it because they can’t keep a consistent fucking routine.

July that year was my dad getting his DBS batteries replaced. It was sensory hell because I got my period the day of the surgery and spent the whole time nauseated and cramping, but being silent about it...only to get called selfish and horrible for mentioning how bad I felt after we were all home again. (Outpatient surgery)

September 2019, mom’s gallbladder almost blew up and she was rushed to the hospital. I was alone with dad, without warning, and had to function using emergency reserves that I didn’t have because I was in burnout. I ran around terrified that any mistake I made would get me screamed at by both my dad and sister. Mom was out of the house from Friday to Tuesday. Dad did nothing but demand and demand from me and yelled at me for melting down. I was almost out of meds and for awhile didn’t know if or when I would get them. I had to grocery shop with sister’s help and she kept getting upset at me for arranging the cart like mom did, and I ended up forgetting things I needed even though I had a list right in front of my face the whole time. I was that out of it.

An aid had to come bathe dad because mom couldn’t do it for at least six weeks. That happened whenever someone could come, so dinner, my showers and mom’s ability to do things were disrupted by waiting for the call that the aid was coming. Coverage only lasted six weeks and then the help was yanked the second mom was declared fit to lift more than 5 pounds again.

October 2019, our car died and so routines got thrown further out of whack because mom and I had to depend on friends and family for rides to grocery shop or go to church. Trips stopped being at a set time and turned into “whenever someone can drive you” so I was uprooted from my day with little warning, and we didn’t get a new car until early December.

December 2019: We Christmas shopped late because of the car bullshit, mom barely got the cookies baked in time, and it was just a super stressful Christmas season.

I struggled through the death anniversary of my dog because that year he was gone as many years as he had lived and I spent most of it in a disassociated state.

Then mom had her bowel obstruction the day after Christmas and was in the hospital from Friday to Sunday. Yet again she was gone and the routine was blown apart without warning. My sister gave me shit the first time I wore my new ear defenders to the grocery store. Dad did nothing but demand and demand from me when I had nothing. I ruined a dinner that I didn’t know how to cook and went hungry but made him eat leftover ham from Christmas.

January 2020, the COVID shit started on the news.

March 2020, I went to the grocery store with mom and shelves were empty like a nuclear war was coming. I was terrified that I would catch COVID and kill my parents by passing it to them. Church closed. Stores opened for senior hours at butthole o’clock in the morning. Weekend routines were destroyed. Choir practices stopped. More routine disruptions.

August 2020, I started having anniversary distress related to what happened to mom the year before.

Then dad fell and broke his hip. I still clear as day see him in his blue shirt, sitting on the stair chair, being pulled backwards out the front door by paramedics with the ambulance lights flashing red and blue under the midnight sky and white street light.

Late September, as I’m struggling a bit with the anniversary of what happened to mom, worrying about dad getting COVID and beginning to relax because “dad is going to be away till he can walk again...” there comes that phone call from shithole New Orange Hills saying they’re sending him home and we find out they lied to us about every promise they made.

October 2020, dad was brought home and now he’s laying in an electric bed in the family room where mom can hear him if he needs her.

Writing that down has me realizing I’ve been experiencing almost continuous upheavals to my routines. Routines give me a sense of safety, and every time things settle something else throws it all to shit again.

So either I have ptsd or I’m possibly developing it, and I’m scared because this seems so ridiculous compared to the reasons other people get it.

#swearing #dad fall drama #disabled abusers #emotional abuse #food mention #tw menstruation #tw pet death

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muckrakerhq · 4 years ago

Photo

PRESENTING … FONDUE FOR TWO, HOSTED BY JOEY HUMMEL-ANDERSON.

featuring… this week’s guests, @giannastone & @angel-alexanderr

fondue for two is a weekly internet talk show hosted by joey hummel-anderson. fondue for two, joey, and the muckraker team strive to get all the steaming gossip while he interviews guests of his choice over a steaming pot of cheese.

[JOEY'S ROOM, SAME SET AS BEFORE]

JOEY: Hello everyone and welcome back to Fondue for Two! We're doing a Glee Club edition this month, which means that I will invite the captains of each glee club that actually matter around here... Today we have the captain of the Warblers, also known as my boyfriend, Xan Puckerman! And we have a very good friend of mine, Gigi Stone! She's not captain of the Canaries, but after the so called slushie incident, Aubrey won't talk to me... Either way, are you guys excited to be here?

XAN : Always excited to be in your bedroom, Joseph.

GIGI: Can we keep the flirting to a minimum today, boys? But yeah, I’m excited to be here. You clearly made the best decision by inviting the most talented Canary.

JOEY: Don't worry Gigi, we'll try. Okay, first question is for Xan... Is it true that everyone at Dalton is gay? Or is that a rumor that was created many years ago?

XAN : While I personally believe that everyone is at least a little gay. The number of out and proud homosexuals at Dalton Academy is lower than you might think. So yeah...definitely a rumor. Possibly a little bit of a problematic one while we're at it.(edited)

JOEY: Well... That's interesting to know. But I'm pretty sure that most people will still think that. Gigi, next question is for you! Do you have a date for Candyland? And if you do, who is it?

GIGI: Duh. Of course I do. I’m going with your brother, actually. Trace asked me the other day.

XAN : Love that for you two.

GIGI: He’s so cute, right? I’m excited.

JOEY: He didn't tell me that! That's cute... Why did you say yes? You know what, that's not important... Since we're talking about Valentine's Day, the next question is for you two: if we weren't all going to Breadstix, what would your perfect Valentine's Day be like? JOEY: Let's stop talking about my brother...

XAN : honestly? i'm not a big holiday person. being born on a holiday kinda ruined all holidays for me i think. but for sake of not looking like an asshole on the internet, i'll say i would be doing something cute with my boyfriend

GIGI: That’s... cute. In a sad sort of way. My perfect Valentine’s Day is being pampered from start to finish. Flowers, jewelry, chocolate. The whole nine yards. GIGI: Trace, if you’re watching this.. Play your cards right and you might be promoted from bench warmer to MVP.

JOEY: 4th of July is a holiday? I thought people just liked to throw fireworks on that day because it's fun, I don't know... But all of those are good answers. Okay, next question, what is the hottest piece of gossip going on at your schools right now? And this is an important one.

XAN : i'm simply not a messy bitch so i have no clue.

JOEY: C'mon, there's gotta be something going on at Dalton!

GIGI: Margot’s dad like literally paid off our coach so she could have a solo at Regionals. Embarrassing, right? Couldn’t be me.

XAN: i will not tolerate Margot slander in my presence. XAN: she's my favorite canary.

JOEY: Wait, did she really do that? Who told you that? I need to know if this is real. Sorry Xanny!

GIGI: It’s literally all anyone can talk about at Crawford? Which is annoying because there’s a lot more interesting things to talk about, but regardless, let’s just say it’s not the first time it’s happened.

JOEY: You heard it here first, people! It won't be a problem though, since you guys lost either way... So sorry about that. But at least the Warblers won! Moving on, who do you guys think will win at Nationals?

XAN : i might be biased. but this is the most competitive warblers year of recent years. i think we could go all the way.

GIGI: Obviously Vocal Adrenaline. No offense to either of you. GIGI: Well, I guess that’ll only happen if they finally kick Giardi off the team.

XAN : i will say...i've heard some rumors about vocal adrenaline's regionals set and i'm a little....terrified for lack of a better word.

GIGI: Say more.

JOEY: Say more right now!

XAN : not to incriminate myself, but i produce rap tracks for this freshman in the warblers. In exchange, he keeps tabs on some of the other show choirs in ohio. let's just say....vocal adrenaline is tributing one of the best vocalists of all time. XAN : expect to cry if you have tickets this weekend.

JOEY: Dua Lipa?

XAN: Not Dua Lipa babes.

GIGI: Interesting. Thanks for the tip, Puckerman.

JOEY: Well, that's kind of scary then... But to answer my own question, I'm sure that the New Directions have a chance too, but we'll see... JOEY: Next question, while we're talking about the show choir world, am I the only one who thinks there's some sexual tension between Julien and Gooby?

XAN : who the hell is gooby?

JOEY: Davis!

XAN: I don't know. That guy gives off heavy asexual vibes to me. Like the definition of soulless automaton. I should know I shared a room with him on the ski trip.

GIGI: (laughs) Davis is the farthest thing from asexual. Soulless? You might be onto something there.

XAN: have you copulated with the enemy???

JOEY: Yeah, have you Gigi? Because that's kind of weird and I can only imagine having sex with Gooby is like sleeping next to a loud breather...

XAN: Or a very unsexy android

JOEY: Or even an emotionless Henry Cavill!

GIGI: Do you two seriously live under a rock? Davis and I have been on and off for the past year and a half or so.

XAN: i don't really pay attention to heterosexual mating patterns...

JOEY: Wait... I thought people from Vocal Adrenaline weren't supposed to sleep with people from other schools... Isn't that why Ivy broke up with Julien?

XAN: i thought Ivy broke up with Julien because he's a cabbage patch kid in a high schooler's body

GIGI: I don’t know why Ivy broke up with Julien, and quite frankly, I don’t care. And to answer your question, they can’t date people from opposing teams during competition season.

JOEY: (chuckles at Xan's comment) Xan, don't be mean! JOEY: Well, yeah, but... Haven't you guys been hooking up for the past year? How does that work?

GIGI: Next question. I didn’t come on here to talk about Davis.

XAN: You heard the lady, stinky.

JOEY: Fine... Who do you think is going to be the most shocking couple at Candyland?

GIGI: Some of these losers actually landing dates is shocking in itself, but I, for one, am interested to see who shows up with the belle of the ball.

XAN: i don’t know about shocking, but I watched Chad texting Bri while we were eating at breastix....and if those two end up back together it would be the LEAST shocking thing in recent history. XAN: actually no...the canaries losing with an all country set would be the least shocking thing in recent history

GIGI: Interesting jab from someone who sang songs from a children’s movie. All I have to say on that front is that the Canaries will never be singing another country song again. You can bet on it.

JOEY: Chad and Bri dated? I had no idea about that... JOEY: But I have to agree with Xan, it was kind of lame... And Trolls isn't a kids' movie! It's a movie for all ages! I love that movie... I'm kind of curious to see who Leo McCarthy is going with, I feel like I haven't seen him in a long time. JOEY: What do you mean about the Canaries though? I thought Aubrey was captain still...

GIGI: And I thought Ivy would never let Julien out of her clutches, but here we are.

XAN: (laughs) not clutches!

JOEY: Okay... Well, that's all the time we have! Before you go, you have to say one nice thing about Gil the Fish... I feel like we haven't been giving him enough attention lately. [points at his fish bowl]

GIGI: I think it’s SO sweet that you bought a fish that looks like Kenna Giardi.

XAN: gil don't listen to her she didn't mean that. you're much sexier than kenna giardi!

JOEY: And that's it! Thank you for being here and for everyone else, don't forget to tune in for Fondue for Two some other time! Bye!

[ THE END ]

#Fondue For Two #fft: episode vi #gianna stone #xan puckerman #joey hummel-anderson

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writethehousedown · 4 years ago

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Lesson In Love (Gigi x Jackie) - Mina

A/N: So excited to participate in one of these challenges again, you treated me so well last time so I’m so excited to release this! Ty so so much to @dollalpaca for being an angel and betaing

Summary: Gigi may or may not be failing her music studies class. She also may or may not have caught feelings for the pretty Persian woman that offered to tutor her. Maybe. She’ll never tell.

“Janet,” Gigi groaned, narrowly avoiding falling off the couch as she rolled over and wrapped her blanket tighter around herself. It was leopard-printed, a gift from Jan to themselves from when they moved into the apartment. “Do you think ‘Intro to Floral Arrangement’ sounds like an easy class? Or do you know anyone who’s taken it?”

“Isn’t it an evening class? I feel like we went over that one like… twenty minutes ago.” The blonde hummed from the floor, not bothering to look up. She was probably right, too. She had her own laptop in front of her, in the process of color-coding her online calendar. Blue for lectures, green for labs and purple for choir practices. Gigi had seen her do this enough times - every semester since they met on move-in day their first year - to be able to recognize the blocks in her schedule at a glance. Sometimes it motivated her knowing that Jan could be so on top of things while also being the most chaotic person Gigi knew, other times it made her want to die and be reborn into someone who could organise her sock draw by diameter.

“Yeah, you’re right.” She frowned, letting out a deep sigh and closing the tab. Goodbye, department of nature studies. So long, her potential florist career.

The thing was, Gigi knew she couldn’t really afford to be particularly picky with only five days before the registration period ended, but still. At least, she thought, she’d long been enrolled in all her textile-related classes for the semester. She was looking forward to most of them too, especially the design ones. Really, it was just that one additional stupid arts gen ed course she needed to get out of the way, and then she’d be free for good.

“How about ‘Art of Listening’?” Gigi asked a few minutes later, reading over the course information. She heard the sound of Jan typing on her keyboard come to a halt. “That kinda sounds like a class for people that want to become therapists or something. Or marriage counsellors?”

“Maybe people that are gonna need marriage counselling, sure,” Jan replied, her typing picking up again.

Gigi laughed, running a hand through her hair and looking back at her screen. “It doesn’t seem too bad, y’know. Just two papers and a final.” She hummed, scrolling through last year’s syllabus. “And it’s actually about music, I could totally do that.”

“Wait, who’s the prof for it?”

“Uh… something-Nguyen I think?“ Gigi paused as she scrolled back up. “Yeah, Andrew Nguyen, why?”

“Oh, that’s the one!” Jan nodded happily. “Rock took it last semester, I think. I remember her talking about it when we first met, she was always complaining about the prof who—”

“Great, you should have just lead with that.” Gigi rolled her eyes as she closed the tab. Rock was one of the more easy going people she’d ever met when it came to that stuff, so she couldn’t imagine what a prof that annoyed her would be like. Probably awful, or at least had a bad taste in anime. A soft but slightly damp piece of fabric hit her in the nose before falling down in front of her, disheartened. She scrunched up her nose in distaste when she realised what Jan just threw at her.

“Why are you throwing your dirty socks at me?” Gigi screeched, picking it up and throwing it back in the blonde’s general direction. “And why is it wet?”

“If you’d just let me finish!” She rolled her eyes pointedly, leaning to grab the sock again. It was a little too far for her to reach, and Gigi watched her stubbornly wiggle to the side until she could close her fingers around it. She smiled victoriously, huffing a little as she leaned back against the couch and made herself stand up straight. “As I was saying,” she started again, enunciating carefully.

“Before I rudely interrupted you.” Gigi grinned down, picking at her nails.

“Yes, before you did indeed do that,” Jan huffed, “Rock took it last semester. And she was always annoyed because the prof didn’t always let them use their laptops in class, but she also said that it was really easy. Most of the time they just had to listen to some music and write about how it made them feel, that sort of stuff.”

“That sounds pretty easy.”

“Right?” Jan nodded excitedly, “And I think she mentioned one of her friends is taking it this semester too. A senior, so she’s probably in the same boat as you.”

Gigi didn’t think that’d make much of a difference, but she didn’t bother telling Jan that. It wasn’t like the class had group projects anyway, so she could hopefully get by with just showing to most lectures and turning in the assignments.

“I really should have done this over the summer, you were right about that,” she exhaled, shutting her laptop and falling back into the couch. She could have gotten those mandatory art electives outside of her major done as a freshmen, or even last year, like most other students in her program did.

“I’m sure it won’t be that bad,“ Jan chuckled, moving closer until she could rest her head comfortably on Gigi’s shoulder, blonde hair falling all over her face. “You’ll do great, because you always do; you’re talented, but you also work hard. So you’re gonna ace all your actual photography classes, pass this one, and be done with all your dumb degree requirements. And then next year you can take all the textiles classes you want, I’ll take all the music production classes I want, we’ll go to each other’s senior showcases, and barely even remember all the time we wasted on the ugly classes we didn’t care about.”

When Jan put it that way, it sounded pretty easy. *** After three weeks of classes, Gigi felt like she could safely conclude that the class was… Not that bad. If she had to give the class a grade it’d be a solid C-, bordering on a straight-up C. It was mostly filled with freshmen from the arts faculty trying to get an easy A, a solid half of whom had already stopped showing up to lectures. And yes, it was weird being back in a two hundred-person room when most of her other classes were forty at most. She had to turn in weekly written assignments, which was also not fun, but writing five hundred words once a week wasn’t a time commitment she couldn’t handle. The problem, though, was that as far as she could tell from those three first weeks, that supposedly-easy class would also n’ot rate the level of effort Gigi had put in as anything more than a C either. Which was definitely not what she wanted out of it. Far from it.

The class did have one major saving grace, a light in the dark and a minor help in stopping Gigi from quitting the class on day one, in the form of a fellow student.

Gigi didn’t know her name, or her major, or anything tangible about her, which was a little unfortunate. She did, however, know that the girl had legs. Long and strong, with toned thighs that suggested at least some form of semi-regular exercise, and looked equally good in the kind of wide-legged, loose cotton pants Gigi herself favoured as they did in denim cutoffs. She had really nice hands too, which the brunette found out about when they accidentally reached for the same assignment sheet. They looked soft, strong and capable and careful. They’d be nice to hold, or to have holding her down tightly, or tangled in her hair while she sucked bruises into her equally-beautiful thighs.

So yeah, you could say Gigi was kind of enjoying the course, sure.

The girl usually sat at the front of the room, in the very first row from where you kind of had to strain your neck upwards to see what was on the board. Gigi knew, because that was also where she sat during the first two weeks, until she realised this wasn’t going to be the kind of lecture where she could talk all the way through the lesson without the professor caring, not if she wanted to do more than just pass, anyway. The girl usually brought her laptop to class too - covered in political stickers and pictures of cartoons Gigi didn’t know. One time the brunette walked past her, only to see a video of a crab walking up a pile of sand playing in the corner of her screen.

Gigi could remember that she made a point about the role of music in religious movements when prompted, and how that connected to society’s idea of liveliness within places of worship. Gigi didn’t really remember the details, mostly because some of it had just flown way over her head, but their professor had been very impressed. When he had said so, instead of the self-satisfied smile that the brunette had been expecting, the girl had looked down at her notes, one arm twitching like she was resisting the urge to scratch at the back of her neck in embarrassment.

Gigi thought she’d even blushed a little, and really, no one should have had the right to be both this attractive and adorable at the same time. She wasn’t quite sure how she felt about the crab video, which was definitely weird, even by art faculty standards. But for her, she thought she might be willing to overlook it.

geege ok this girl at the front of listening class? so hot she’s like 90 percent leg and 40 percent sexy aunt energy

janjanjan sounds Hot

geege i’d let her walk all over me and say ty she’d just be like :] and tell me about the periodic table or smth

janjanjan okay maybe let’s stop there like keep the rest for when you’re alone at home

geege or in the shower

janjanjan thanks not like i use that shower too The thing was, Gigi wasn’t new to having crushes. At all. So perhaps it shouldn’t have come as a surprise to herself that she ended up developing crushes on more than a few of the people she met. Most of them were great, a lot of them were cute, and a few left her heart beating that much faster as she found herself wishing for their conversations to never end.

What was new (or disconcerting, if she were to listen to the Jan voice in her head), was Gigi feeling that way about someone she’d never talked to. Gigi still didn’t know anything about her, other than what she looked like and the sound of her voice - but god did she want to know.

And it felt like it’d been years, so many years, since Gigi had felt too shy to just go up to someone she wanted to know better and introduce herself. She’d felt anxious before, maybe a little self-conscious, but not the kind of shyness that turned into complete inaction. She found herself looking forward to the class, though not the actual work. *** She, Gigi thought, was currently winning at life.

She was done with classes for the week, had no plans that required her to get out of her sweatpants for the next twenty four hours, and was currently sitting back on the couch surrounded by food and two of her favourite people.

So yeah, life was pretty fucking great right now.

She leaned back against one arm of the sofa, a forgotten ball of yarn and half knitted almost-scarf in one hand and the other casually playing with Jan’s hair. The blonde was laying down on the couch, the only one out of the three of them that could kind of do so without most of her legs hanging off one end. Her head was resting on Gigi’s lap while her feet were in Rock’s.

Friday evening was their unofficially -designated group hang out time, a tradition that developed the last few months without any of them being aware of it, but now it was something that she wouldn’t miss for the world. It usually just meant Thai food, bitching about their classes, and whatever booze one of the other two decided to pick up. When Rock made grabby hands at her, Gigi grabbed an unopened can of sparkling water she brought for today and passed it on.

“Thank you,” Rock chuckled as she cracked it open, leaning forward to catch some of the foam that came out before it had a chance to further stain the couch. “Y’know,” she started, as she watched Gigi reach over for the mostly-empty bag of popcorn on the table. “I could just ask Jackie to help you out with the class.”

The brunette’s fingers closed on thin air, the bag of popcorn she was aiming for remaining just out of reach. “Who’s Jackie?” she asked absently, shuffling forward gently and trying not to dislodge Jan’s head from her lap.

Jan flicked her on the thigh regardless. “Rock’s friend, the one I told you about when you signed up! And, y’know, the one that’s also taking the class right now.”

“Oh,” Gigi realised. She totally remembered that, right. Her fingers grazed the bag of popcorn again, but in her haste she just ended up pushing it a few inches further away, balancing precariously on one edge of the table. “That Jackie.”

“I think she tutored, like, half her contemporary fiction class last year. So you know she’s gotta be good at actually teaching things, and not just smart,” Jan continued, as though Gigi’s attention was mostly captured by the pursuit of academics. One more inch, she leaned in a little further, balancing her weight on one arm. She just needed to get one inch closer and the bag would be hers. She could already taste the powdery, buttery, amazingness on her tongue.

“And Rockie’s always talking about how her old professor still basically cries about not being able to convince her to stay in the department. I’m pretty sure she’d totally still take him on as a grad student if Jackie just asked, nevermind that she transferred out more than two years ago.”

“So what do you think?” The blonde finished, a little more loudly, like she realised Gigi had tuned her out a bit. And Gigi had, yes, but she could finally feel her fingers closing in on the bag, triumphantly reaching in and stuffing a handful of popcorn - fat free - into her mouth. “Do you want Rock to ask Jackie when she has some time to meet up with you? Or maybe just give her your number, if that’s easier?”

“What? No, don’t do that. I’m not doing that bad.” Gigi laughed slightly, rolling her eyes. “No, I’m all good.”

“It’s too late anyway,” Rock laughed, all faux-casual. “I already messaged her.” She shoved her phone in front of Gigi’s face, and yeah, right there, that was a message saying just that, complete with her own number at the end.

“Why would you do that?” She complained loudly, tapping at the screen furiously to try and make it delete. It wasn’t that she was against the idea of getting help with the class, but mostly she was reluctant to have it taking up more of her time than it already did. Especially when she didn’t even know the girl.

“You need help!” Rock said with a yelp, avoiding the kick Gigi aimed at her. “She can help! It’s a perfect solution, why are you trying to hit me!” The last one landed just under her armpit, drawing out a higher-pitched squeal. “Besides, Jan agreed with me that it’s a good idea,” she added, turning expectantly towards her. “Tell her how you were the first one to even suggest it.”

Next to them, Jan had indeed been suspiciously quiet. “Why aren’t you saying anything?” Gigi asked, poking the older woman in the chest.

“Don’t you want to see what your soon-to-be tutor looks like, Geege?” Jan giggled, ignoring her question.

“Oh, you’re right, let me show you her insta,” Rock butted in, her thumbs moving on her phone screen for a moment before handing it to Gigi with an evil smile.

Jacqueline Coxx, the profile read, next to a very familiar, grinning face. The same very familiar, grinning face that Gigi had spent many a lesson fawning over. This had to be a mistake, there was no way. “You should really be better at Instagram-stalking people,” Jan laughed as Gigi felt her mind going blank. “I think it’s the only skill that’s going to save our generation from lifelong unemployment. Or underemployment, for that matter.”

The brunette didn’t give it a second thought before she pushed her off the couch and onto the floor, screams of unacceptable betrayal and terrified excitement echoing loud in the room.

*** geege hiiiii is this jackie cox? this is gigi, roxanne’s friend from the listening class she said she’d told you i would message you geege but in case she didn’t i wanted to ask you about some tutoring if you could tutor me i mean geege but if you can’t that’s all good !! don’t feel like you have to say yes just bc of rocks stupid puppy eyes oh and sorry about the triple-text ***

“I more than triple-texted her, but three separate times,” Gigi groaned, burying her face in between the couch cushions.

“I’m sure it wasn’t that bad,” Jan comforted, running a hand through her hair. Gigi would maybe feel a little bad about how much complaining she’d been doing over this, but everytime she thought of stopping, she reminded herself that Jan was at least forty-five percent to blame for this in the first place.

“It’s been more than two days. When’s the last time you went forty-eight hours without checking your phone? And be honest.”

Jan’s silence was enough of an answer. *** Jackie Hey Gigi! Rock did tell me about you, it’s all good Do you want to meet up after class on monday to figure out the details? Oh and sorry for such a late reply My phone was broken after i dropped it in a lake while i was hiking *** In an ideal world, Gigi would have planned things so she could get to class nice and early on the day she was supposed to properly meet Jackie. She’d have maybe put a little more thought than usual into her outfit, and made sure her hair looked good. Worn that red headband she knew did great things for her forehead and her eyebrows, maybe. Not that Gigi ever looked like a slob, but she definitely had clothes she liked more than others, and that she thought served her better for seduction purposes. Or even for just ‘making a decent first impression’, which she’d really settle for right now, as she ran up the final flight of stairs. Nothing said ‘I’m serious about needing help with this class’ like showing up late, especially for a course where attendance was actually recorded.

She spotted the door to the classroom still cracked open at the end of the hallway and slowed down a little, trying to catch her breath. She ran a hand through her hair, hoping that’d tame the mess a little and her cheeks wouldn’t be too red from the unexpected burst of athleticism. At the front of the room, their professor has already started talking, and Gigi quietly slipped into the first free seat she spotted, grateful to have avoided drawing everyone’s attention to herself.

It was only minutes before the class ended that Gigi thought to look around for Jackie, peering across the middle rows of students before she accepted that she wouldn’t dare sit anywhere but the very front row. She tried to lean forward to glance at the first row once or twice, eventually accepting that there was no way she could be subtle and standing the slightest bit up from her chair. The first row was mostly empty, as it usually tended to be. Gigi recognized a girl from the Image Composition class she took last semester, and thought about saying hi to her after class when she remembered she had a goal here. As she let her gaze move through the other students in the front, it eventually landed on Jackie, although Gigi had to do a double-take to make sure it was definitely her.

The thing was, she’d gotten to see - unknowingly, at the time - Jackie often enough since the semester started to get a sense of her style. And from Gigi’s weeks of casual observation, she tended to favour loose, comfortable clothes, and mostly neutral colours. She liked floral patterns too, especially on shirts, which the brunette could appreciate.

However, the first thing she noticed today was Jackie’s hair. And really, Gigi thought that if it wasn’t for the bright smile and the longest legs known to humankind, she wouldn’t have even recognized her.

The messy dark brown hair that Gigi had gotten used to, and maybe dreamt about running her hands through once or twice, was now four inches shorter and numbingly straight, effortlessly falling over her forehead and almost into her eyes when she looked down. Something about the flawlessness of her hair combined with the white hoodie she was wearing seemed to make her face glow, skin tanned and radiant with pearly teeth glinting through a bemused grin as she laughed at something her friend was saying.

Damn.

She was brought out of her daydreaming by the sound of students around her packing up their things, and Gigi realised that she most likely missed the professor dismissing their class. As she struggled with the zipper of her bag, the same one she’d been meaning to get fixed for the last three months but still hadn’t, she felt a hand hesitantly tap on her shoulder, warm against the thin material of her shirt.

“Hey, Georgia right?” A voice asked right behind her, and when Gigi turned around Jackie looked just as good as she did the first time she saw her at the beginning of the semester.

“Gigi. I’m— my name— Yep, hi, that’s me. What’s shaking?” The brunette chuckled awkwardly, “Thank you so much for agreeing to help me out, I really appreciate it! Or at least agreeing to consider it I mean, I know we really just said we’d talk about the details today, so you technically haven’t agreed to anything yet. And you don’t have to, obviously.”

Jackie didn’t seem thrown off by the sudden explosion of words and gratefulness, which Gigi took to be a good sign. If anything, her smile only grew less hesitant, the tiniest dimple appearing on her left cheek.

“We could, like, go to that library around the block? It’s a nice place to study, so.” Gigi nodded, following Jackie and making awkward small talk until they made it inside. She learned in those quick minutes that Jackie liked crabs, and geography, and obscure movie references no one else understood.

“It’s been a while since I was here to be honest.” Jackie grinned, swiping at her phone casually. “I missed it.”

"Right, Rock mentioned you’d transferred out of the faculty.”

The brunette hummed in agreement, looking a little surprised at Gigi’s knowing about this. “Yeah, I swapped my major and minor back halfway through my second year. Geo major with a minor in stage production now.” She made little jazz hand motions as she said it, and the brunette really wished she didn’t find it half as endearing as she did.

“Okay, so, tell me more about what you’ve been struggling with so far,” Jackie asked with a tilt of her head, and they got down to business. *** Maybe it was a little self-sabotaging (or self-serving, she could never quite decide), but part of what Gigi quickly found out she liked best about their bi-weekly tutoring sessions, was how much time she got to just stare at Jackie. She’d finish writing up the draft of her weekly listening assignment and pass it on for the older woman to read over, and get a solid five-to-ten minutes of ogling out of it.

Not that she was ogling her per se, that sounded bad. She was just… appreciating. Appreciating Jackie’s arms, and her neck, and her cheekbones, and her brain as she read through Gigi’s outline. Every now and then, Gigi would catch her frowning slightly, bringing her pen to the paper and tapping over the words as she read a section a few times over before making a quick note and moving on. It was kind of embarrassing how devastatingly cute Gigi found the whole thing, honestly. Like how the way she was resting her head on one hand, her fingers accidentally creating a gap that just perfectly framed the dimple on her left cheek.

“Hey, Geege,” Jackie suddenly smiled as she turned towards her. Fuck. Gigi really hoped her face wasn’t making what she was just doing incredibly obvious. “What did you have in mind for this part here?” She asked, shuffling her chair to bridge the space between the two of them.

“Which part?” Gigi shakily replied, leaning in a little. The paper she wrote her outline on was on the table, technically close enough for both of them to read, but just barely. Gigi told herself that was her excuse for moving in a few inches more, until their hands were almost meeting on the sheet of paper. Almost.

Jackie was making it hard for Gigi to focus, leaving her stumbling through the start of an explanation of the admittedly somewhat unclear point she’d made in her outline about the sudden change in rhythm. As she got into the meat of her point, she could feel herself getting more confidence, gesturing with her hands as the words started coming out more easily, and Jackie nodded in wordless understanding. It only took a few sessions to realize that if there was one thing Jackie was good at, it’s listening. It never felt like she was trying to put answers into Gigi’s mouth - letting her explain her perception of the music instead, and asking questions when needed. She made Gigi feel like even if writing about how she experienced music as an art form would never come all that naturally to her, not in the way sewing or even most visual arts did, it was something that was still within her reach. Something she could understand and relate to.

“So, are you saying it felt expected to you?” Jackie asked eventually, after Gigi paused. “Like it was building up to this in the previous parts? Or that it caught your attention specifically because it was sudden? Or out-of-place, maybe.”

The brunette took a moment to think, replaying the lead-up to that section in her head.

They weren’t even touching, but she could feel the heat radiating off the older woman’s skin. She could feel the warmth, could see it in Jackie’s gaze as she looked softly back at her, she could smell it even. And Gigi knows that didn’t actually make sense, that all she was probably smelling was laundry detergent and sweat and maybe coffee. Gigi didn’t even like the smell of coffee. But right now, sitting side-by-side in the library and alternating between emphatically talking and listening to each other, Gigi felt like all of those things.

It was only when they both moved on from that particular point, a few messy notes from Jackie hastily written to Gigi’s own words, that she realized just how close they’d gotten. She was well into Jackie’s personal space, their shoulders no longer content just brushing against each other occasionally but rather aligned against one another. No wonder she could smell the coffee.

She started to move back slowly, not wanting to draw attention to how close she’d gotten, but a sharp sting on her ear stopped her mid-motion. She let out a small cry of pain, Jackie immediately turning to face her. The older girl felt impossibly closer than a moment ago.

“I think my earring got caught in your shirt,” Gigi said quietly, a pained and nervous giggle leaping from the back of her throat. She remembered putting them on this morning, long and dangly strips of silver shaped like eyes, and thinking about how they might get stuck in her hair. If the lack of distance between the two of them went unnoticed earlier, it was definitely no longer the case. Gigi felt incredibly conscious of every exhale of her breath, of Jackie’s face only inches away from hers. The guy in the seat in front of them threw them a dirty look, like he was annoyed at how wrong Gigi’s flirting attempts had turned out. She couldn’t really blame him because, what the fuck, they had turned out pretty bad, huh.

“Hold on,” Jackie breathed, “let me untangle it for you.” Gigi knew she was speaking quietly because they were in a library, and so close to each other anything above a whisper was unnecessary, but she was struck hard by the intimacy of it nonetheless. She couldn’t decipher whether choosing to wear those earrings today was the best or worst decision she’d ever made.

Jackie reached for the end that got caught, carefully lifting it away from the threads of her sweater. It was the kind of tangle no one could probably ever manage to achieve if they tried, and yet happened without either of them realizing it. When she moved to grasp at the fabric a little more firmly, her fingers brushed against Gigi’s neck, unexpected. And maybe it’s stupid to feel so thoroughly destabilized by the mere touch of a fleeting hand, but Gigi found herself forgetting to breathe for a few seconds.

“There,” Jackie chuckled as the earring finally came free, looking in Gigi’s direction without directly meeting her gaze. “I think you’re all good now.”

Gigi thanked her politely, but she’d be the first to admit she found it hard to focus during the rest of their session, every brush of air or clothing against her neck making her shiver at the memory of Jackie’s fingers. ***

“Wait, Jackie Coxx?” Crystal asked the next time Gigi met up with her to catch up over some drinks in their favorite dive bar. Crystal had technically been Jan’s friend first, but she and Gigi had gotten a lot closer over the years, bonding over a love of what their friends would lovingly call ‘loud’ and ‘confident’ clothing choices. “‘Trips on her own feet’ Jackie Coxx?” Crystal continued, the grin on her face widening as Gigi felt her cheeks heating up. “Follows at least three Twitter accounts dedicated to Star Trek? Rockie’s junior year baby crush? The same—”

“Rock is still a junior, Crys,” Gigi interrupted, laughing, because— what. What. “And wait, she has a crush on Jackie? My Jackie?”

“So not the point,” Crystal answered, still smiling like this was the best news she’d heard all week. “My Jackie huh? God, you’re such a simp—”

“No.” Gigi groaned, dragging out the ‘o’. “Back to Rock. My best friend, Janet fucking Sport, is head over heels, stupidly in love with Rock. And I don’t care how adorable she is, if what you’re telling me is true, she’s just been… been using her! And that really this whole time she’s just been waiting and pining for Jackie! As if Jan didn’t—”

It was Crystal’s turn to interrupt this time, the smile having faded away from her face to leave way for a confused expression. “Gigi, Gigi, stop for a second,” she repeated, a little more forceful than the brunette was used to hearing her speak. “Come on, think of all the time you’ve spent with Rock, with both of them. Have you ever gotten the impression that she was anything that a hundred and ten percent in?”

The brunette closed her eyes for a moment. She thought of Jan ditching her and Nicky to go hang out with Rock every Friday. Of Jan dragging her to go shopping on the weekend before Valentine’s day, an itemized and color-coded list of stores and potential gifts saved on her phone. Crystal definitely has a point, Gigi let herself recognize, deflating as the potential anger left her body as quickly as it had arrived.

“Rock did a tour of the university, back when she was still in high school and she wasn’t completely sure what program to apply for. Jackie was the one doing it apparently.” The red head paused to take a sip of her drink, grimacing a little at the taste. Why she kept ordering those novelty IPAs everywhere they went despite knowing full well she didn’t like how hoppy they were, Gigi had no idea. “I think she just made Rock feel comfortable, you know? Like, it was fine that she didn’t have everything figured out already, and made sure she knew she wasn’t making a decision at seventeen that she could never walk back. So Jackie gave her her number in case she had any questions, and then they actually started hanging out together once Rock started this year.”

“Oh,” Gigi realised, “that does really sound like her, yeah.” She could imagine it in her head, Rock a little younger and more unsure, not all that dissimilar from how she behaved when Jan first introduced the two of them to each other.

It was strange, remembering that a few months ago she would avoid directly meeting her gaze or spending any one-on-one time with her, when she could also recall the ‘u up’ and ‘netflix? :)’ texts she received from the shorter woman last night. It also really sounded like Jackie, although she didn’t tell Crystal so. It was just as easy to imagine her taking the time to reassure a worried high-school student without making her feel like she was being talked down to.

Crystal was still looking at her expectantly, and Gigi couldn’t help but feel a little embarrassed at how strongly she reacted. “So, not an actual crush then?”

“Nope, she just thinks Jackie is really cool. God knows why, because based on what I’ve heard, she’s kind of a giant dork.”

“Hot giant dork.” Gigi rolled her eyes. “Maybe I should have asked you that first.”

“Uh-huh,” Crystal replied, giving Gigi’s shoulder a squeeze. “You should ask her for the full story, actually. I’m surprised you haven’t heard it before, but she tells it much better than I do. And maybe you want to spend some time thinking about why you reacted that quickly, because we both know Jan is a pretty flimsy excuse.”

The brunette sighed loudly. “It’s just a crush, it’s nothing.” It didn’t sound convincing even to herself. Back when Jackie was just the hot girl in her class, that would have probably been true, but it felt like a long time ago now.

Crystal rolled her eyes with a cheeky smile. “That was a lot more believable five minutes ago, but sure.”

Gigi made sure to hit her in the leg for that, laughing easily and sputtering mindlessly about how she had it all wrong.

“Wait, what did Rock used to want to study, back when she was in high school?”

There was a long pause, before Crystal finally cackled., “Video game design.” *** geege do you think it’s weird

rockstar YES

geege … to ask someone if you can platonically caress their cheeks kiss them on the forehead at least wait till i finish to be mean

rockstar u know what this is both not as weird AND weirder than i expected ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

geege what do I do roxanne she’s not gonna tutor me forever. the final is less than a month away how do i tell her i wanna date her without seeming like i wanna date her

rockstar go up to her and be like ‘if we played pokemon together, we’d be a pokematch’ ;)))

geege what

rockstar will you be the nidoking to my nidoqueen

geege tf those sound like the names of drugs

rockstar yk it was one thing when you were just thirsting after the hot girl in ur class but now it’s actual feelings how embarrassing

geege u have given me a solid amount of advice. none.

rockstar k fair how about i pick up noodles on my way back? and we can eat that for dinner while you tell me all about ur gay crush without my consent

geege i like the chicken stir fry ones

*** “Do you want to listen to it again, maybe?” Jackie asked, reaching for her headphones. “Then you can tell me the exact part you’re thinking of.”

It was another Wednesday afternoon, but this time they’d ditched the library in favor of a small coffee shop that was closer to where Jackie lived. It was artsy in a way that Gigi was used to, a little hipster, but not actually fancy enough to properly lay claim on the word. The tables were a little worn in and wobbly, the lattes a little too cheap, and the art prints on the wall either too well-known or not enough.

“Sure, just give me a second.” Gigi took the earbud the Persian woman offered her, making an aborted motion towards the computer, before following through as Jackie nodded at her with a soft smile. The older woman’s phone vibrated on the table between them, and she took a quick glance at the screen before putting it back down with a little more force than necessary.

It took Gigi a few tries to find the part she had in mind when mentioning texture, replaying the same part a few times over until she was fairly certain she found what she was looking for. “That part here, until the tempo slows down again—”

The brunette was cut off by the sound of Jackie’s phone vibrating on the table again, lighting up with a missed call notification and some texts.

“Shit, I’m sorry,” the Persian woman cursed sheepishly. “This is so rude. I’m sorry, Geege, I should have just turned it off earlier.” She sounded a little annoyed, but mostly flustered, taking a quick look at the screen before flipping it back over facing down.

She flashed the younger woman an apologetic smile, her cheeks coloring a little as she pointedly pushed the phone away from her.

“Are you sure everything is okay? We can take a break if you need to deal with some stuff? Or even just cancel for today, I think I have basically everything I need to finish writing this up, so.”

“No, no, âsemun be zamin nemiyâd,” Jackie protested, mind clearly elsewhere. “It’s nothing, really. Or, well, it is something I guess, but it’s kind of stupid and I shouldn’t let it distract me, you know?”

Gigi hummed noncommittally, not wanting to force her to talk about whatever this was if she didn’t want to, but finding herself unwilling to acknowledge it as something stupid either. She offered Jackie what she hoped was a quick and comforting smile instead.

“I just…” She sighed, rubbing at her eyes with the heel of her palm. “I’ve been waiting to hear back from this prof about a recommendation letter for grad school? And she’d said yes before, but some more students asked her, and she has this thing about not writing more than five letters per year, I don’t know. So she said she’d get back to me today or tomorrow to confirm, and I’ve just been really stressed.”

“Oh no, I’m sorry. That sounds really stressful.” Gigi brought a hand to Jackie’s shoulders, squeezing the back of her neck lightly. She tried to avoid doing too much extensive thinking about what she might do after college, but she doubted it was a train of thought that’d ever made anyone feel good.

“It’s okay, I should be used to it.” Jackie shrugged with resignation. “It’s just that every time I remember I’m waiting to hear back from her it makes me think of next year, and what’ll happen if I don’t get in? Or if I do, because it’s like I really know that grad school is what I want to do, you know?” She ran a frustrated hand through her hair, and Gigi really wished they were close enough friends for her to offer Jackie a hug or something.

“Just call your prof back now. You should have said something earlier, and we could have rescheduled.”

“Oh,” Jackie breathed out, sounding inexplicably surprised as she turned towards her. “No, no, no, no, that’s not necessary. That wasn’t her. I’m sorry I’m a bit of a mess today, let’s just get back to this thing, yeah?”

Gigi nodded, reaching for the headphones and passing one on to her. In a lot of ways, this had grown to be her favorite part of their sessions. Not that she didn’t enjoy listening to Jackie talk about music, which she did; mostly because she was practically tone deaf and found it magical that Jackie was so good at it, or trading ideas back and forth on the pieces they listened to, both of which were rewarding in their own ways. But there was something about sitting next to each other, silent save for the shared music, that just got to her.

They were standing outside the coffeeshop, Jackie struggling to undo the lock on her bike, when Gigi thought back to their earlier conversation. “I know it’s not the same because I’m not graduating yet, but you know I’m here if you ever need to talk to someone, right? Like, no pressure or anything, but I just— just wanted to put it out there, I guess.”

Jackie stopped mid-motion and looked up at her, half of her U-lock in hand. “Thanks, Gigi.” She grinned, all bright and pearly and warm. “I think sometimes I just get too in my own head, you know? Especially about things I can’t do anything about. And yes, I know how stupid it is to stress out over these things so much, I really do.”

“I don’t think that’s stupid, though,” Gigi mentioned, as they started walking towards her bus stop. It was really nice of Jackie to walk there with her, rather than just take off on her bike straight away. It maybe made sense now that they knew each other well enough, but her heart still kind of fluttered whenever she offered it. “I mean, maybe it’s not productive because you’re worrying about things you can’t control, sure, but it also means you care, right? And I don’t think that’s something stupid, even if you wish you could just… not care less, but care better, you know. Still care, but in a way that’s better for yourself. To yourself.”

She thought of her parents, and of the guilt she used to feel every time she overheard someone asking them if they really thought it was wise to let her go to college for fashion, how she overworked herself to the point of passing out alone in the studio her freshman year in a misguided attempt to redeem herself from having failed a class. Like she thought she could atone for her perceived academic failures by working her body into the ground. She thought of the conversations that had started to happen in her periphery, whispers of ‘What are you thinking of doing after next year?’, ‘Have you also applied for the internship at this gallery?’, ‘Have you considered doing a minor in business?’, and how she sometimes struggled with not letting these thoughts invade her brain late at night.

“I just think it’s hard sometimes, but it’s even harder if we don’t let ourselves accept it. Or talk about it. So I guess all I’m saying is that if you need someone to listen, you know where to find me,” she finished with a deep breath.

When she looked up, there was a quiet smile on Jackie’s face, and Gigi felt warm at the thought of maybe having been the one to put it there. ***

geege you know i suddenly understand why you do the shoulder thing like i use to never really get it but that was before

janjanjan the shoulder thing??

geege wait more important how did ur audition go did they love you when are you gonna hear back

janjanjan it went pretty okay i think they’re def looking more for someone that does modern

geege so that’s good! very good!!!

janjanjan and one of the choreographers sort of smiled and nodded at me at the end i think he was on the dance team my first semester but that was before he graduated ig anyway idk maybe it was just in my head

geege no but that all sounds really good!!! look at u go diva!

janjanjan gigi just finished twenty minutes ago she was wearing this stupid ass shirt a really loose tank bc it’s been hot af and one of the straps kept falling of her shoulder

janjanjan oooooooooh oh no that shoulder thing

geege i saw collarbone and so much shoulder and upper arm

janjanjan how tragic tell me, did she lift it back up

geege yeah but it kept falling back down

janjanjan that’s rly good though!!!

geege no it was torture did you know she has a mole on her shoulder? right at the top and all i kept thinking of was that i wanted to kiss it

janjanjan cute also i don’t know how to tell you this but that shit doesn’t happen by itself

geege well it’s not like it was her fault

janjanjan listen a shirt can be a too big sure but you still kind of have to make it happen it doesn’t magically keep falling off

geege hm

janjanjan believe me i would know *** No matter how much she tried to forget about it, Gigi’s last session with Jackie was a thing that was very much happening right now.

It was strange, thinking back to the beginning of the semester, how she almost didn’t sign up for the class. How she maybe would have never met Jackie if she hadn’t, or maybe would have just pined from afar without ever learning her name were it not for her meddling friends. She found herself spending the last half of their session wondering more about how to casually ask Jackie if they’d still hang out once finals are over. Or if their semester-long friendship was, well, just that.

In the end, she just blurted it out as they packed up their things, subtlety thrown out the window.

“I mean, you’re friends with Rock, so I’m sure I’ll at least see you around, yeah?”

Jackie only hummed noncommittally in reply. She was busy packing her things back into her khaki tote bag, checking each pocket like she was looking for something. It reminded Gigi of what she used to do in middle school, every time she hadn’t done the homework or just really, really, really didn’t want to be the one called on to explain her work in front of the whole class. She’d just lean down, and start searching through her bag very obviously, making a show of opening every zipper, her head almost disappearing inside it if she could manage.

“Do you, like, need help finding something in there?” She asked, her voice coming out more harsh than she’d intended, just as Jackie seemed to decide she’d found what she was looking for and decisively slung her bag back over her shoulder.

“Sorry, I— it was—” she stopped and started, letting out a resigned sigh and shaking her head at herself. It made Gigi want to cringe. “Yeah, I’m good now, and yeah, I’ll still see you around. At least for the summer, but after that too I hope! I mean, I’ll still be around and you’ll be around too, so, y’know…” she trailed off. Her cheeks were tinged pink, just barely. Her ears, too, or maybe it was just the white of her sweater making everything appear brighter in contrast. “Besides, you still haven’t shown me any of your work, and you promised you would.” She was right about that, Gigi knew. She usually wasn’t shy about showing her designs to other people, but somehow she’d found himself unsure of what to show Jackie first.

She settled her bag on one shoulder, and they started making their way out in companionable silence until Jackie spoke again. “Hey, actually, do you maybe want to grab coffee before heading back? I have a bit of time before my next class and I could use a pick-me-up.”

They ended up just stopping by Starbucks, because it was on their way and surprisingly empty for a Thursday afternoon on campus. Gigi got a mocha frappuccino (almond milk, extra whip) and managed to sneak in Jackie’s usual cold brew order before she had the chance to protest.

“Gigi…” She sighed fondly, kind of like a grandma would when her grandchildren were doing something they’d regret. She was shaking her head in resignation, which Gigi took as a sign that she’d decided to leave it at that.

“No, I’ve been stealing almost three hours of your time every week since almost the start of the semester and—”

“How can that even be true when Rock only introduced us in what, February?” Jackie laughed in protest, reaching out to grab her drink from the brunette’s hand.

“No, not the point!” Gigi replied, moving her arm back until the cup was just out of Jackie’s reach. “You’ve given up a lot of your free time for me, is what I’m saying. And you didn’t even really know me, I could’ve been a total freak.”

Jackie opened her mouth and looked like she was about to say something, but Gigi continued before she had the chance.

“And you were so nice about it. Not ‘nice’ like when you have nothing actually all that good or specific to say. But nice in that you never made me feel like I was being stupid, you know? And you actually took the time to explain things to me so I’d understand them, not just the bare minimum so I could pass. You did all that when you didn’t really have to, so that meant a lot. Means a lot. I enjoyed spending that time with you, and not because it means I’m going to pass the class.”

Gigi forced herself to stop there, even though she knew for a fact that she could’ve easily kept going. She could feel her words coming out a little rambly, probably sounding more confusing than appreciative. At least she hoped that was what they sounded like, because the only other alternative was frightening. The idea that Jackie was in fact hearing everything Gigi was saying, her poor attempt at expressing the warmth she had felt growing inside her all semester long every time she was beside her, was infinitely more terrifying.

“Geege.” Jackie looked away, smiling after a moment, looking a little embarrassed. “I don’t even know where to start.”

Gigi could feel her cheeks getting hot, but when she looked up she could see that Jackie’s cheeks were tinged pink, too. It was almost funny, feeling what she felt and seeing the physical reflection of it not on herself, but on the person causing it. She wanted to reach out and let the tip of her fingers brush against Jackie’s cheeks, to see if they felt as warm as her own face did.

“You don’t have to say anything, I wasn’t trying to, like, I don’t know, get anything. I just wanted you to know what I meant, and that I really did mean it, when I was saying thank you.”

Gigi was laid bare, like her body was nothing but a lens, and behind it were all of her feelings jumbled together in a tangled mess, conclusion still very plain to the eye.

It was a surprise, when Jackie stepped forward and kissed her.

Gigi closed her eyes reflexively, but she could feel herself inhaling sharply, her body failing to catch up with what her brain was also struggling to process. When she eventually kissed back, it was only because she could feel Jackie’s body starting to move away, the fear finally pushing her into action. She brought one hand up, resting it on the side of the older woman’s neck, fingers gently brushing against her hair as she kissed back a little more confident. She could feel Jackie’s hand on her waist, warm and solid. Her grip tightened slightly as they separated, not strong enough to keep Gigi anywhere but a reassurance of where she was wanted.

Neither one of them really stepped back when the kiss ended, just stayed standing right in front of each other, breathing the same air. She heard Jackie swallow, loud in the silence of their shared space. She licked her lips, a reflex she didn’t even think about, and it was like the realization that, oh my god, they just kissed, hit her all over again when she found them wet. She suppressed a small shudder, although she wasn’t sure how successfully.

It was Jackie that finally broke the silence and stepped away from her, letting her hand fall away from Gigi’s side, brushing against her wrist and then gone before she had a chance to realize it.

“I,” Jackie breathed, “I’ve wanted to do this for a really long time, Gigi.” She laughed a little, maybe a bit self-conscious, and that was what brought the younger woman out of it.

“I spent hours talking to Jan about this gorgeous girl in my listening class,” she started, words leaving her mouth almost of their own volition. “How I didn’t even know her name but god, I really wish I did. Then I did know, even if I didn’t realize that you were, you know, you, when Rock said he knew someone who could tutor me. And then you were there and still the same person, but also so nice and understanding and just… good? Like, being around you just felt good.”

She paused, forcing herself to meet Jackie’s eyes again. “And I still mean everything I said earlier too, you know. Even if you weren’t interested in me, that’s not why I was saying it, but I still mean it just as much now.”

“Oh.” Jackie’s mouth was gaping so wide Gigi was worried it might actually fall to the floor. Maybe if Gigi were a different person, or if her brain wasn’t currently busy processing and reprocessing their kiss on an endless loop, she would have felt a little self-conscious at her outburst, but that just wasn’t who she was.

Especially not right now. Not when Jackie’s lips were right in front of her, still a little wet, still a little too red.

“That’s, that’s pretty good, then,” she finished quietly. They looked at each other in silence for a moment, only interrupted when Gigi let out a small snort.She couldn’t help but realise they were kind of ridiculous. Her face was taken over by an unashamedly stupidly large grin. Jackie properly stepped back then, far enough that Gigi could no longer feel the warmth of her body. She missed it immediately.

“I really need to get to my next class.” Jackie rolled her eyes. “So I can talk to the prof about her feedback on my draft first, but text me, yeah? I know it’s really shitty timing because we both have finals to take and papers to write, but I’ll make it work. Or I’ll call you, if that’s better? But I’m not running away, I promise.”

Gigi flashed her a bright smile and nodded in understanding. “I have your number too, y’know, so maybe I’ll just be the one to text you.”

“Okay, great, nice.” Jackie replied. She had her bag and coffee in hand, but made no clear motion to leave, kind of like she was worried if she did Gigi might disappear forever. It was so, incredibly, frustratingly cute and Gigi couldn’t help but wonder if Jackie would mind being kissed on the forehead.

“Jacks, it’s fine.” Gigi grinned. “I need to go too, anyway. Just maybe don’t drop your phone in any lake before you text me back this time, yeah?”

She turned away with a laugh of her own this time, and Gigi sipped through the plastic straw like it did anything to hide the smile on her face as she watched Jackie walk away.

“Wait!”

The Persian woman startled, turning back to her with an unsure smile. “What, did you forget something, Geege?”

“My first final is tomorrow,” Gigi said, looking up at Jackie with glinting eyes. “And it’s my first actual written exam this year, because I didn’t have any midterms, so how about another kiss for good luck, huh?”

Gigi’s cheeks ached from the force of her smile as she watched the uncertainty leave Jackie’s face, only to be replaced by a raised eyebrow and deep smile. Her shoulder’s rose slightly, like her instincts were telling her to hide her face in embarrassment at the cheesiness, but her eyes didn’t leave Gigi’s anyway. They didn’t leave Gigi’s, until they closed and their lips met again, and the younger woman thought it felt like more luck than she thought she had the right to ask for.

#rpdr fanfiction #gigi goode #jackie cox #rock m sakura #Jan Sport #Crystal Methyd #gigi goode/jackie cox #jan sport/rock m sakura #jiji #jock #lesson in love #mina #lesbian au #back to school 2020 #day 4: lesson #submission

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prettypinklass · 4 years ago

Text

I might start posting oneshots on here, like this one. Maybe.

The Queen's Songstress, the Songstress's Queen

Author: Pink

Word Count: 2513

Warnings/Notes: Fluff, Petra Works too Hard, orphans, Dagda OC, implied/mentioned racism, implied homophobia

Prompt: Paired Endings (Intertwined Destinies event from the Fire Emblem Amino)

~♡~

When she had first returned to Brigid, she had acted as a translator for her friend, who despite pleading to join her, knew nothing of the language.

Now, years later, Dorothea could speak the common language of Brigid as easily as she could Fodlan's.

"It's because you're such a good teacher, Petra," she teased, after Petra had praised her skills.

Despite her grandfather's approval, the people of Brigid had been skeptical of their marriage at first. Dorothea's Fodlanese heritage didn't help. Nonetheless, they didn't argue. Their new queen was happy, and that was what mattered.

Now, years later, the people praised them as one of the best pairs of rulers they had.

Queen Petra worked tirelessly to improve their relationship with Fodlan after declaring independence. Her wife, the Lady Dorothea, used her connections with the Opera to help. It was hard work, but they succeeded eventually.

Now, Petra lived her life working tirelessly to help her citizens. Everyday she could be found holding public hearings to address their problems, or in her room, signing paperwork, and on some occasions in a meeting, dealing with the other nobles. It was tiring work, but she would endure it for her kingdom.

Dorothea had built an Opera house in the capital city of Brigid, after extensively studying the nature of Brigid's fine arts and music. She ran the place on her own, wrote their plays, and held weekly singing practices that were open to all, where people could gather and and sing together. Her troupe became famous throughout not only Brigid, but Fodlan as well, eventually even receiving audiences from Dagda and Almyra.

Today in particular had been a hard day.

The queen had visitors not only from Fodlan, but from Almyra and Dagda as well. The meeting had been… tiring, to say the least. Seeing an old classmate again after so long on strictly professional terms had been… difficult, the man from Almyra was beefy, and loud, which was a stark contrast to the noble from Dadga, who was posh and professional.

Petra had collapsed into her desk chair after the meeting.

Dorothea had been laying on their bed, humming. Her day had been rough as well, having to deal not only with racist participants in the day's open singing practice, but also guide visitors from the foreign countries in the song. Though she had seen one familiar face, it had still been… difficult.

She jumped up when Petra entered though, before her face fell. The queen had sat down at her desk, and immediately reached for her paperwork.

"Petra…" the singer stood up with a small sigh, walking over, "Come on, you need to get some rest."

"I don't have time for rest," Petra replied, "I must get this work done…"

"Love, you're exhausted…" Dorothea sighed, resting her hands on the queens shoulders and beginning to rub slowly, "Why don't you take a break? Let me sing for you."

She hesitated, "Are… you sure? I must get this paperwork done…"

"You can do it later," the songstress insisted, "Take a break, love. You need one."

Petra frowned at her, shifting to face her wife. Dorothea smiled reassuringly at her, and smiled wider when the queen began to relax, "I have a day off tomorrow…"

"You can finish the paperwork first thing tomorrow, and then we can go out together."

It was quiet for a moment.

Petra sighed, and stood up as she gave in, "Okay… Will you sing for me, Thea?"

"Of course," Dorothea smiled even brighter in response, and pulled her wife over to the bed. The two laid next to each other, as she hummed softly.

"What song would you like me to sing?"

"No preference."

"Hmm… okay," Dorothea sat up, and began humming. The humming went on for a few moments, changing pitch and tune to match a song, and then…

"Reach for my hand," she began to sing softly, "I'll soar away. Into the dawn, oh, I wish I could stay."

Petra rolled over and smiled at her.

"In cherished halls, in peaceful days, I fear the edge of dawn… knowing time betrays."

Her voice was soft, soothing, and before long… the queen had fallen asleep.

And when she had finished the song, as she was never one to leave something half done, Dorothea fell asleep too.

~♡~

As promised, Petra finished her paperwork early, and Dorothea had dragged her off to see the town shortly afterward.

People waved as they passed by, and the pair waved back happily. Brigid's capital really was a lively and friendly place.

Just after noon had come, Dorothea brought her wife to the opera house. There was a public singing session today, and even half an hour before it started, people were beginning to gather.

A certain indigo haired woman was there already, looking around. Dorothea smiled.

"Shamir!"

Shamir looked up, and grinned, "Well well. We meet again, kid. Your Majesty," she bowed to Petra, "To what do I owe this pleasure?"

Petra fumbled for words. She still wasn't the best at Fodlanese…

"This day- er, Today, is my free day. I am not having work to do."

"Lucky you," Shamir replied, "It's good to see you both again."

"Am I assuming you came with the Dagda noble?" Petra asked.

"Fodlan actually," she shrugged, "Mercenary life gets me plenty of jobs. Just so happened I was in town, and the lord was looking for a suitable guard."

"Interesting," the queen hummed.

"Are you here for choir?" Dorothea asked, tilting her head to the side with a happy smile.

"I guess so. Lord Aegir wanted to come and I'm kind of obligated to follow him everywhere unless he specifically says so," Shamir shrugged, "He's talking to some of the singers, along with that guy from Almyra. Nader or something."

"You didn't tell me Ferdie was the visiting noble!" Dorothea turned to pout at Petra.

"It never came up," Petra admitted, laughing a little.

"Anyway, I'm going to go find something to do… singing isn't my thing."

"You joined yesterday," Dorothea blinked at Shamir.

"I was exploring town and got caught up in it somehow," Shamir sighed, "Lord Aegir's over there if you want to talk to him."

"Alright then… bye!" The songstress waved. Petra waved as well.

The pair turned, and walked over to the ginger haired noble.

"Ferdie!"

Ferdinand turned, and broke into a huge smile, "Dorothea! The ugly maiden!"

Everyone paused to stare at him.

Someone in the back began snickering.

"Uhh…"

"Ferdie," Dorothea frowned, "Um… Do you know what 'aklos' means Brigid?"

"Why, I was told it meant lovely!" Ferdinand replied, smiling brightly, "Impressive, right?"

Dorothea began giggling, as Petra sighed.

"Ah, Ferdinand… The Brigidian word for 'lovely', is 'akLAS'. Aklos is our word for ugly."

The noble blinked.

His face turned pink.

"B-by the goddess! Please, accept my sincerest apologies!" He bowed, "I have been tricked it seems…"

"Don't worry about it," Dorothea laughed, "Are you here for choir?"

"Why yes! I heard from Manuela that you run your own opera house here! She misses you by the way, and is hoping to one day collaborate with your opera."

"Oh, I would love to! I'll have to send a letter to her!" Dorothea exclaimed happily, "Thank you Ferdie!"

"But of course! It is my duty to assist!"

One of the actresses, a young woman, called over, "Miss Dorothea! We're ready to begin!"

"Oh! That's my cue," Dorothea smiled, and giggled slightly, "Have fun Love," she pecked Petra on the cheek, and waved at Ferdinand, before running up to join the singers at the podium.

Choir was always a joy for Petra to attend. Not only did she get to hear her wife's beautiful voice, but the act made her feel… closer to others, not only to her Dorothea, but to her citizens as well. The same citizens loved it when she would join them as well.

Ferdinand sang loudly, and he sounded well enough. Nader on the other hand, sounded like a dying bird. The look Dorothea gave him at the end of the first song would've scared the pants off of even the most fiercest soldier.

He ended up being asked to sing... quietly, so that the others could be heard over him.

Even Shamir participated, though at the request of Ferdinand. She seemed to enjoy herself though, if only for one song.

It seemed like only a few minutes later when choir ended, though it had been at least an hour.

"You were great Petra!" The songstress quickly began gushing, "Even better than before!"

"You're making me blush Thea," Petra laughed in embarrassment, "You sounded much better than I did."

"Even so," she giggled, "Well, what would you like to do now?"

"Why don't we visit the orphanage?"

"Sounds like a wonderful idea," Dorothea replied, "Let's head there now, and then we can be home in time for dinner."

"Right," the queen nodded, and after saying goodbye to Ferdinand and Shamir, they began walking to the orphanage.

~♡~

The orphanage was as lively as ever.

Though the place was small, and the only residents were a few children and their caretaker, it was always lively. The children were often running around and playing together, making noise and sometimes causing chaos. The 4 of them were quite the handful for their caretaker, but they managed.

A jingle sounded as they entered.

"Just a moment!" Came a call from the back. A few seconds later, the caretaker appeared, carrying a box.

"Oh!" She gasped, "Your Majesty, Lady Dorothea! What a pleasant surprise!"

"Hello Chey," Petra smiled, "We came to visit."

"The children were just wondering when they would be able to see you again," Chey laughed, smiling, "Children! You have a visitor!"

Light footsteps were heard immediately. The quick pitter patter of small feet echoed in the building, as a group came tumbling out of the bedrooms.

First came Fiona, a 7 year old. She was quickly followed by the 8 year old, Darrell, who stumbled and tripped onto her. Fiona squealed.

Lily came next, the oldest at age 11, "Hey! Be careful, I'm holding Harry!"

Harry let out a "Bubba!" and burst into giggles. He was the youngest of the four, being just barely a year in age. Fiona and Darrell fumed at each other.

"Now now,' Chey frowned, walking over to them, "Don't get into a fight. Look who came to visit!"

"Kween Petwa! Dorufea!' Harry babbled excitedly, "Petwa and Dorufea! Yay!"

"Q-Queen Petra! Lady Dorothea!" Lily gasped, and did a quick bow still holding the toddler, "It's a pleasure to see you again!"

"Petra! Dorothea! Hi!' Fiona brightened up quickly and waved.

"Idiot, it's QUEEN Petra and LADY Dorothea! Don't forget your manners!" Darrell hissed at her.

"What do titles matter?" She crossed her arms with a huff.

"A lot!"

"How?"

"Because-"

"That's enough," Chey sighed, "No fighting. Apologize to Her Majesty and Lady Dorothea."

The pair glared at each other. She nudged them.

Darrell was first.

"I'm sorry Queen Petra, Lady Dorothea…"

"Sorry…" Fiona mumbled quickly just after him.

Harry babbled something that nobody understood. Dorothea laughed, and took him from Lily. He squealed happily, and pulled her hair. She winced, but laughed.

"Your apology is accepted, little ones," Petra knelt down to smile at Fiona and Darrell, "It is a pleasure to see you again."

The two smiled brightly at her in response.

"What do you say?" Chey prompted.

"Thank you Queen Petra!" The two chorused, before running off into the back playfully shoving each other.

"Ah…" the caretaker watched them run off, "I'll have to scold them later… I'm sorry."

"Don't worry about it," Dorothea laughed, "You seem to be handling them well."

"Ah, well… I'm not quite sure how I ended up with four of them. I picked up Lily off the streets and since then… Well I haven't been able to say no to them like that," the caretaker laughed softly, "Will you be staying for a visit your Majesty? Lady Dorothea?"

"Please?" Lily added with a smile.

Harry babbled and giggled happily.

"I'm sure we can stay for a little bit," Petra nodded.

"Of course," Dorothea smiled brightly, "It would be a pleasure."

Lily cheered, and Harry babbled. The royal pair followed her into the backroom with a laugh.

~♡~

The meeting room was silent.

Dorothea suppressed a sigh. Shamir glanced at her from across the room.

"...and that is why I believe we should cut off trade entirely. I don't mean to be accusing, but recent affairs have proven my suspicions."

The noble from Dagda would not shut up. He kept going on and on about how Fodlan's recent battles proved them unstable, and their rocky relationship with surrounding areas didn't help.

"Lord Hanth, please," Ferdinand sighed, "I can assure you with 100% positivity that Fodlan is unified in all ways. I ask that you please refrain from this incessant blabbering about us being unstable, when it is not backed up by factual evidence."

Hanth scowled, "Of course you would say that, Lord Aegir. You're FROM Fodlan-"

Petra sighed, "Lord Hanth, with all due respect, I can fully support Lord Aegir's claims as witness. Dorothea and I were present for the unification of Fodlan."

"That is not the only issue!" Hanth snapped, "Her, for example!" He pointed at Shamir, "Why is a citizen of Dagda-"

"I'm from Dagda, yeah," Shamir crossed her arms, "I came to Fodlan as a mercenary. Lord Aegir hired me."

Ferdinand raised an eyebrow at the Dadga lord.

"We were invaded once-"

"You started that fight," Dorothea pointed out.

He scowled, "I refuse to do trade until both Fodlan and Brigid have proven their stability. With that, I believe this meeting is over."

He turned and stomped out.

"...Geez," Nader sighed, "What a guy."

Dorothea jumped. She had forgotten about the Almyran general.

"General Nader, thoughts?" Petra looked over.

"I got no problem with trade, long as Fodlan doesn't interfere with our merchants," the general shrugged, "Might have to double check with the king on that though."

"I see. In that case, do what you must," she nodded.

"...Shamir, are all the nobles from Dagda like that?" Ferdinand asked.

"Dunno," Shamir shrugged, "I haven't been there in years."

"Well," Dorothea sighed, "I suppose not trading with Dagda isn't too much of a loss…"

"I am sure we can manage," Petra nodded, "Ferdinand? Are you confirming a trade with Brigid?"

"But of course!" Ferdinand smiled, "And I hope we can establish trade with Almyra as well!"

"Hah! Sounds good!" Nader laughed.

"Shall we shake on it then?" The nobleman asked.

"Yes," Petra nodded, and held out her hand. She shook with Ferdinand, then Nader, and then the two shook hands with each other.

It was agreed.

Ruling a country that once was a vassal to another wasn't easy. Especially not when there were relationships she had to repair with other kingdoms, but maybe… just maybe, she could do it.

As long as she had Dorothea, the person whom she is said to have loved the most, standing at her side.

~♡~

#LOOK THESE TWO ARE SUPER FCKING CUTE #fluff #petrathea #doropetra #dorothea arnault #petra macneary #fire emblem #fe3h #three houses #fire emblem three houses #Petra works too hard #writing #writing prompt #FE amino #dagda #implied/mentioned racism #implied homophobia #don't worry it's barely mentioned

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