#okay now im just kind of rambling on
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okay that break was shorter than...yeah idk i cant think of some dumb metaphor to go with this. it was a short break thats all really
#i like taking the social out of social media so when i start to witness bullshit discourse out of my little mutual bubble#it annoys the abolute fuck out of me#like i should not have to witness everyones takes that are so removed from the mark they are one the opposite corner of the page in which#the mark is#if you couldnt tell i just got bored#and i like talking to myself in this echo chamber of a blog (with an audience of about 3 at a time) because otherwise i talk to myself irl#and my sister is like dude why are you talking to yourself are you okay#okay now im just kind of rambling on#anyway. hi
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proper refs for my new r&m ocs :-) more info BELOW
morty v-37 - basically gets used as a human shield and then promptly left for dead by his previous rick(which is why hes got the scar and prosthetics), y-4441 finds him and fixes him up + erases his memories of the whole nearly dying thing. he’s pretty chillaxed and a bit more cynical than an average morty, more “rickish” i guess idk. tends to be skeptical, likes poking holes in rick’s arguments/inventions etc etc but like in a teasing way
rick y-4441 - very peppy, upbeat and emotional. he kind of reeaalllyyy dislikes the cfc and stays away from it as much as possible, especially after finding and unofficially adopting v-37. he’s not as tech savvy as most rick’s, his abilities are more akin to s1 rick’s skill level? as in, he lives off of scraps of materials and creative solutions, less god-like and more “old man in garage who happens to know physics and chemistry”. loves to ramble about basically anything and happily indulges in morty’s hypotheticals/questions whatever. EXCEPT! for why morty doesnt have his fingers he shuts that topic down immediately just does not want to deal with that can of worms at allll
#rick and morty#rick sanchez#morty smith#ocs#idk#theres no name or real story for this au#except for like their backstories i mea#like they have no direction they're just chilling#but i like drawing them#theyre kind of? role swapped versions? buuutt like okay.#i usually hate roleswap aus bcs the way most ppl do them is by just tweaking designs AND ALSO switching the personalities#like ok this is just me rambling abt a pet peeve now but listen to me#it is much more interesting to take the characters and Keep Them The Same while putting them in a different position#that is a neat au in my opinion#but just ugh.#like ok if u just wanna draw alternative versions of the charas thats fine OBVIOUSLY#but i wish there was a biiittt more thought in there. like just a shred of idea#'scientist morty but he's still empathetic and loves his family' + 'regular grandpa rick who is just such an ass for no reason at all'#ok im over it. tell me my ocs r cool
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@girlymatsu ive been unable to stop thinking about these three being friends since you mentioned it, so i hope you dont mind that i drew out a few ideas ^^;!!
#my art#ocs#kiru#keiko#others ocs#its like 4am so sorry if my handwriting is a little sloppy OTL i hope its still legible...!!#also i couldnt find any examples of erinas work attire so i decided to wing it... im sure youve drawn it before im just a little tired#it ended up looking a bit minimalist for her tastes...... lets just say its a lazy day for her HEHE#but mostly i think kiru and erina would have a lot of common ground in. well not exactly SHARED experiences#but the emotions surrounding how they connect to other people/feel a need to perform i think is very similar#for kiru some of it is in the past but make no mistake the constantly calm/collected ''reliable nee-san'' thing is kind of a facade#not Fully but still. shes quite guarded#okay im rambling now BYEEE
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I was just messing around but now i ironically like it but i was making this strawpage for a DIFFERENT blog and now it's like. OKAY WELL. EITHER I THROW ONE TOGETHER FOR THIS BLOG TOO OR I CHANGE IT.
#im probably just gonna change it#do i NEED a strawpage and carrd? no probably not. but im enjoying this too much so enjoy yall#ough. Cal would also look adorable there#guys whats it like seeing me blog about some F/Os i have never mentioned ever ever#is Strip even ON my list??????? I like him and think about him more than a normal amount but he just does not rotate enough in my brain-#-for me to be vocal about him#OKAY IM RAMBLING IN THE TAGS AGAIN IM LEAVING NOW#toptier Kane shitpostin.g sorry yall im on my pc and got some funky silly music playin im goin crazy right now#feels kinda good to yap and be a bit carefree about it. even if no one will see it but like... in a im okay with this now. or at least more#-than i used to be#OKAY IM ERALLY DONE NOW I SWEAR. for this post at least#if anyone read this than. idk. I will buy you your favorite bread a whole loaf of it you can pick any kind any bakery#selfshipping#selfship#self shipping#self ship#selfship gushing
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If you shush Rust, would you place your finger on his mouth or on his skull's mouth? (sarcastic)
That's not actually what Zero is doing but it looked really goofy when I was rendering Rust's helmet lmao Also, I have some other things in the works; non Rust x Zero related things. One has to do with Prometheus and Menoetius (a character I've only briefly touched on and is someone Prometheus would consider a sibling of sorts). It's actually a minor gore piece too, so that's fun. Uhmmm... *clicks tongue* I dunno, I think that's it lmfao
TLT MASTERLIST
#WIP#digital art#fan art#Living Tombstone#TLT#The Living Tombstone#tombsona#tombsonas#Zero_One#Rust#Zero One#Zero_One x Rust#Zero One x Rust#ship#ship art#Drawing a Tombsona from the angle Zero is in this is so strange#Like how would the skull even look? I tried it's not perfect but it's whatever lmao this is a three-part thing anyways#(four if you count the doodle that I already posted lmao)#sorry for rambling#Im just kind of off today so I'm a bit scatter brained lmao#okay ill shut up now#OBLIGATORY DISCLAIMER:#this work depicts Rust and Zero being shipped: this has NOTHING to do with shipping the musicians behind the characters
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hey so do you think wtv keiko had to deal with growing up with yusuke could be considered a type of parentification
#god chapters where barely anything happens except a character's realization about things can be hard ...#im writing another keiko pov chapter and it's hard because well!!#keiko was never really a main focus in the series and as time goes on she gets even less of a focus so i have to fill in these spots#in her personality and views that aren't really explored. im taking a lot of liberties lets say#and idek if it's gonna read as in character cos of that#anyway im tryna say that like. pre series keiko was basically this presence in yusuke's life and he saw her as a pain but he cared#she was there to scold him and cajole him into going to his classes and she was his only friend#now we know atsuko was negligent and idk how involved the yukimuras were in his life but i feel like keiko#whether directly or indirectly was given this duty like you have to keep him outta trouble#you're smart you're mature he needs someone like you. this responsibility just kind of put on her before she can understand the weight of i#and she can't really comprehend that weight until it's abruptly taken from her. yusuke dies and there's no one to shepherd#i feel like keiko should get to be mad about this. this realization of the nature of their dynamic. keiko planning things around yusuke#who's never done that in his life. not because he's purposely being thoughtless but bc he was never the one to have to plan#to think about what their future looks like. he just kinda drifted along and keiko tried to do damage control. it wasn't fair#yusuke is keeping secrets from her she is scared of high school and that he'll die again without her knowing why and it's unfair#so she should get to be mad also because girls getting to be mad is one of my favorite things 👍🏼#the realization that yusuke won't be lost without her so she shouldn't hinge her life on the expectation that he will be#she worries about yusuke a lot i think. especially after he comes back from the dead. and i think kuwa's presence would help ease that#dread in her heart. it doesn't have to be just me. there's someone who can be there with him always and it doesn't have to be me#the guilty relief of not having to be the sacrifice. but kuwa doesn't mind so maybe it's okay this way#idk just rambles about my fic while i puzzle out how to word it#character analysis#yukimura keiko#yu yu hakusho
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(Click for better quality)
Healing & Growth
(gif made by my friend @robanilla-arts is below - slight warning for flashing! Thanks again, Rob!)
#if you feel like reading it - I'm gonna ramble in the tags.#Don't really feel like having it attached to the post for forever... cause what if i just wanna reblog some fairysona art??#anyways#this year sucked a lot. in a lot of ways. but im grateful for it.#healing is stupidly hard and annoyingly enough? not linear in the slightest. Yet infuriatingly - it is worth it.#I am far from done with healing. I've barely scratched the surface.#but im learning and connecting with myself along the way.#The biggest step I've taken this year is working on my people pleasing ways. it's a bad habit birthed from a lot of different traumas.#but it no longer rules my life.#I am not passive anymore - and surprise! that doesn't make me a horrible or evil person.#my kindness is no longer a weakness. its still a part of me and always will be. i won't let go of it.#but it is no longer to a fault#there are people undeserving of my kindness... i realize that now. I know what i will and will not put up with in every kind of relationshi#im still learning and exploring - and i've said a lot of goodbyes this year. I'm sure i will say more.#but that's okay.#some relationships are forever - some serve you for a while and teach you a lesson when they end.#and some relationships stick around and don't *have* to have a deeper connection#and that's also okay.#I didn't think I'd make it through this year in all honesty. I was very close to ending it all on multiple occasions.#But. for what it's worth - as of now im glad im here.#i will continue to struggle and have my hard times. im not naive enough to think depression just goes away.#but im okay for now and im moving forward.#there will be pauses and abrupt stops and likely some good ol' rotting involved. but when i can - ill be moving forward.#i will not speak a word of 2024 because no matter what it will have it's ups and downs.#but i will continue to keep working on myself. and that's all anyone can do in this weird life.#if you made it through all of that... uhhhh wow you got a crush on me or smth? /j/j/j/j#but fr - if you read this far... thank you. i hope you're faring well and that you have a happy celebration tonight.#sleep well and dream well when it comes to you#yucky draws#my art
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my mental state or whatever is so bad these days i genuinely started thinking that my purpose in life is literally just to kill myself lmfaoo 😭
#like what kind of a 'purpose' is that bro 😭 thats not a purpose. thats not the point of a life lmaooo#but like genuinely the only thing i think abt nowadays is when i should kms. im like wondering which day would be the best and most#convenient for everyone skjfgsjkf like. thats not normal#and see my thing is (i am ranting now teehee) so my thing is. i dont understand why i cant just talk abt this to my family or anyone#like i DONT want to talk about it i would chew my arm off first rather than talk about it. but. like i should lmfao.#like if i told them hey yall i dont want to live and i dont really want to die either but i feel like thats my only option etc they would#want to help me. if i told them hey can yall just sit down with me and help me figure this out they would!!!#but the thing is i dont want to lol. i dont want to. and i dont know why that is#dear diary ass post. okay thats all <3 just thinking out loud and everything <3#zsófi rambles
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maybe I'm comfortable with tumblr because I get to say things I don't usually tell anyone
#like how my day is? or what dumb stuff im doing lol#my “safe space” where i got to meet people somehow (and theyre very cool :3c)#well. im happy if i get to do it now#cmon nae! sympathy points wont do you any good !!#okay so. tumblr gets to be my little planner too cause i get to write things in the momoment#so im writing things im proud of!#brushed my teeth for more than two mins today#n i actually washed a lil! its embarrassing writing this here because i dont want anyone thinking im dirty.... since its gross#but anyways.. im getting better at putting my phone down at night!#that means fixing my sleep right? i just have to sort out the mornings since i lose track of time#and struggle to leave bed (its too comfyyyy >.<)#and oh. i want to start going on walks..#itll be hard since the house is getting done n stuff but. anytine if the day. i feel like taking walks woukd be better for me#just to keave the house. my eyes always hurts when i steo outside#n thats not good :<#those are my goals for now. i do wanna get closer to my friends. and actually make friends!#ive had no friendships for nearly a year at college lol#its just been 'oh well' but i have actually felt lonely... oh well-#i guess i wanna get closer to people?#and.. talk to ny old friends too#i feel to guilty#im not good with this stuff. it drains me#but anyways. baby steps right? who knows#maybe ill make a friend on the trip! or next year too! that sounds good#ik nobody'll probably read this cause its word vomit lol#but basically yay yippee im feelin kinds alright#<333#posts.nae/rambles
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t4t laios toshiro exactly the same relationship but toshiro realised young that she was a girl n has never met another trans person so seeing laios transition after meeting her just continues to perplex and frustrate her (she wants to Fix laios so bad but by god she's annoying. kabru can do it instead ig)
HELPMe yeah yeah truly a t4t love story for the ages
#i think t4t laishuro is silly if like#ok so transfem toshiro#meets the toudens (laios first)#and shes like wow this guy is like the opposite of me#and then meets falin . yaddi yadda gets a crush on falin (transfem icon)#kind of gender envy a bit too cuz shes so soft and sweet and . toshiros all rough around the edges. trained warrior#shes a healer who can fix her.#and like toshiro thinks maybe . maybe i can be with her 🤔#and proposes.#yaddi yadda dunmeshi happens#meets laios again. okay.#yaddi yadda everything else happened#hugs laios. yay#laios transitions#toshiro and falin rejection that ends in friendship#again laios has transitioned. toshiro meets laios again#promise of starting over on a clean slate ish. i suppose#toshiros like : ''huh shes so much freer now. im more envious of her''#and they fall in love but its slow burn#also kabru is there with his t4t manuscript#woo'd laios already#toshiro feels she has to compete somewhat#kabru calls her babygirl#toshiro goes nevermind i think . i will just die 🫶😊😐#namari consoles her and they go kill their dads together#the end..#asks#dunmeshi#sorry for the RAMBLE in the tags . im just insane#tree 🌳🐈⬛ !
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Having something you've been putting off but really want to do vs something you kind of want to do and can do immediately causes you to read the entire dungeon meshi manga within the span of 5 hours instead of doing the thing you were supposed to do
#ryss rambles#dungeon meshi#delicious in dungeon#im in shambles#but also this was good#cuz the thing i need to do is based off dungeon meshi#and now that im in the mindset i think i can complete the task#its these kind of things that make me think i may not be mentally sane#but thats okay#my mental illness is what provides great content for my friends to enjoy#something that makes me very happy#and i got to read a good story which also makes me happy#so if i complete this task ill be double triple happy#and then i can share it with all of you which means they happiness just keeps doubling and continuing#so its a win win win win win win win win#pretty epic amiright#okay ive got to#do task now#but its not task its fun#lets a go a mario
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are you leaving? sorry for asking :/
Not sure yet :') being in this fandom takes such a huge toll on me when shit hits the fan that i cant really justify to myself staying and being invested in the same capacity as I have been. However I love my mutuals and this community too damn much to just up and leave completely 😭 for now im gonna take a break from tumblr and just give it some time. I could never leave tumblr fully though I fear I'm a yapper at heart so maybe I'll just end up posting about whatever. I really don't know ! I'll figure it out !!
#Don't really want to talk abt the whole situation on here I'm not the person for that#But yeah you all will hear from me again god knows I am incapable of shutting the hell up#And I want 2 say i truly consider dtblr to be my favorite fandom I've ever been in despite all the (very low💀) lows#You all are so incredibly funny and creative and kind and I really am so thankful I got to be a part of it all#When I think abt the friends I've made I could rlly just cry I love u all so much !!#Okay now it sounds like I'm writing a fucking eulogy DORRY ITS NOT THAT DEEP IM JUST NOT LOGGING ON THIS WEBSITE FOR A BIT GODDAMN#Like for all I know tomorrow I'll be like damn it wasn't really that serious and reblog dnf sucking cock or whatever#I'm joking^. It would probably be a frog picture#OKAY whatever I'm rambling I'm just gonna go and log out of my account on here CIAO#asks
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ngl i think i kind of was a genius for being like 'yeah this character is a scary killyou cannibal scary killer who scary kills you' and then realizing that the way my worldbuilding works out is that there's a nonzero chance that if you leave literally any body parts over they can just come back, depending on what they believe in their heart of hearts can kill them. Of course she'd start eating her kills. She probably tried normal stuff first and then realized it didn't work and she had to try harder if she wanted to actually keep them dead.
#red rambles#im working on a character who i made up years and years ago and wasnt even happy with then because he didnt seem to have enough like#interior thoughts he was just like a guy who killed people when he was stressed and his life was constantly stressful and then he killed on#person too many and they were like 'this is fucking untenable and he has to die' and then they killed him#which is soooooooooo absolutely nothing honestly. Like it works as a barebones summary but i want to stress there was actually straight up#nothing else there. the entire rest of his whole whatnot was just being entangled with Haven who is a different character who at the time#ALSO felt unsatisfyingly lacking in interiority but at lesat he had really complex motivations and action flowcharts. that werent just 'i#get grumpy and i just go kill some random person with no regard for what the consequences will be and then i am so mean and i kill you'#now theres a lot more happening. i really didnt. like.#okay so i had a Backstory worked out but it was vague because i didnt know what the fuck he WANTEDDDDDDD right like. i had no motivations a#literally all except 'oohhh i kill people ooohhh i like killing people ooohhh im erratic i kill people' and the background i HAD was like.#Upper class scion of some rich family whose family honest to god just did not like him very much and also [gestures vaguely] i guess he#maybe kicked dogs or something and then he ??nebulous timeline meets haven and then kills his sister or kills his sister and very quickly#thereafter meets haven but i usually lean toward the former because haven LOVES convincing people to kill their whole families its like#cathartic for him because he would love to kill his entire family but physically cannot do it. but like kind of the implications of this#as far as i was concerned given this is set in the mid 1800s was like. ehhh he's getting away with this because he's rich white and male an#it pays to turn a blind eye to his indiscretions or w/e. a genderswap means that she'd be subject to a lot more scrutiny on basis of like#misogyny. LOL. and i already had the preexisting 'hates half sibling' (i genderswapped the sister into a brother because why not) and 'hate#parents' and 'parents strongly dislike her' and 'unsettling' and it worked nicely to start giving me actual fucking. Literally anything to#work with there. because it means that by going off with Haven she walks out of one situation where she has like 0 agency into another one#and like to be clear i respect anyone who is sitting around in haven's general vicinity for snapping and just starting to kill people. me t#but this works. SOOOOOOOOOO much better for real#im still working the kinks out but like also this means that she wins. she wins like multiple times actually. she comes closer to killing#haven than anyone since he learned what fucking species he was and causes him more trouble in the interest of getting the FUCK out of there#than anyone else has and then she fucking gets what she was going for against literally every effort haven could've made over ~five decades#get owned loser.#every time i draw her i cant help it i write some shit like PLEASE JUST GET DIVORCED on it even though i wrote the fucking narrative i know#it will never fucking happen and thats why she does all this shit instead#in another world she'd be like the wildly capable owner of Raytheon 2 or some other shit like that. like she'd never be a nice or good#person but she wouldn't be dead. god she could be in charge of a country or some shit. Alas. Please get divorced.
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the sinus headaches are already not great but Extra Shit has been added to the pile and im just sat on that right now trying to figure out what the fuck to do
#ive uh not processed it yet and it also wont really shake out for a little while now i guess but .. yeah#long story short my friends who ive been A Trio with since we were 11 might be done with each other#theres a LOT of additional factors but theyre splitting a house share so one can go live with a boyfriend#and in the process it sounds like theyve made a lot of selfish choices for some unknown reason#ngl theyve pissed me off a little bit for being so weird and reclusive since theyve had the boyfriend as well but only with us#its ... yeah i dont know what alls happened because i dont live with them#but i just cant fathom how they got to this point quibbling over the contents of their shared house of 5 years#over a boyfriend whos been around for 2 or 3 years ..... to ruin a friendship of 18 years ????#again i dont know the whole story but i trust what the friend whos still good at talking to us to not lie about them being screwed around#i just dont get it at all how to reconcile what ive been told with who ive known over half my life#theyve felt off .. or wrong for a while now tbh ... i miss them#i havent seen the other one since before may ...#the thought that mightve been the last time we all hang out is kind of killling me inside lol#and it was also pretty weird and stilted again because it was very boyfriend-centric#this always happens to me lol ive lost count of all my school friend groups who end up basically fighting over me after they fall out#its a MAJOR trauma point for me and i thought we kind of grew past that but i guess i was wrong#ive been catching myself with a weepy eye or a single sob all day#i dont know what to do i wanna know what the fuck happened and what was worth doing this for#i wanna confront everyone and ask for a fucking explanation as to why my single life solid bedrock is falling apart#i mostly wanna dig a hole and die in it ... im fine im safe but im bothered by like ...#what a total fool ill look like if i just melt down at work ... i might find the mental health first aiders list and write an email lol#im like not okay cksbdkssj fucking hell#i have some hope but its ... its hard out here#i need to go to bed fuck#id dont neeeeed thiiiiisss im gonna choke on life agaaaiiinnn#the battle to keep my shit together enough to at least not self-sabotage ??? its testing my patience#rory's ramblings
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I wish I could go back and tell younger me that I would in fact find that place one day full of people that I adore deeply and who I know love me in return. Who make me feel wanted and cared for and appreciated in a way I never thought would be possible. And none of it required hiding, or forcing myself to be a person I’m not. And I still have that space even though I’m aroace.
For the first time ever, I see a future where I’m not alone. And I wish I could go back and tell my younger self it would happen. It’s possible to not be constantly lonely.
#ravenpuff rambles#I’ve been lucky enough in my life to make amazing friends several times#several of whom are still in my life now#but it’s only been recently that I’ve felt like I truly found my place#I don’t know how to explain it#I guess up until now I have always gone into friendships expecting them to end and holding back just a little bit#and this is the first time I don’t feel like I have to run because I don’t feel like these people are going to leave me#maybe it’s just because one of them is also aroace and we’ve talked a lot about those similar feelings of being left behind#never had someone quite get that before#and maybe it’s just I feel more willing to open my heart#admittedly this group of ours went through some shit together and that’s how the friendships really started forming#and so maybe that helps#but it’s like#Have you ever met someone who is so much like you in so many ways that its like the joke of ‘#‘can I copy your homework?’ ‘yeah just be sure to change it so no one knows’#It’s a weird thing of feeling so completely and totally seen by somebody sometimes without having to say a word#anyways#I’m really happy with this little place I found and I wish I could tell younger me#and also tell xem that no it doesn’t look like a fanfic dream#no im not their person but yeah they’re kind of mine but that’s okay#its nothing and everything like I always thought of#and for the first time in my life I don’t feel a crush sense of loneliness#yes I wish I could see them in person#but I can be okay with everything I do get
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a trope i absolutely love is a really good “where did they go”/runaway trope. i love that shit. i go FERAL for it. runaway/missing persons/whodunit but the person in question’s body HASNT BEEN FOUND??? i eat it up. allison from pll; sadie from sadie (courtney summers); lucy gray baird (tbosas); the list is ENDLESS!
‘she’s missing?’ someone asks.
‘he’s never been found.” your teacher says solemnly, head bowed.
they left that one sunny afternoon, before the clock struck twelve, and haven’t been home since.
one day, zir was just gone. and zir was here, once. that memory is there—faded like an old photograph, like the indents of your nails in your palm. Zir had been here, it says. but time passes, and those little truths suddenly aren’t truths at all.
i love that shit. i love that opening—it’s a day like any other, or maybe it’s not (maybe the earth swallowed you whole before you even woke up and you know you know before your eyes even open) and this person (they loved you; you knew them; you hated them; you love them; when did you meet?; that face…; did you even know them, who was that?) is gone. it may be a mystery to a small town, or a simple statistic in a big city, or a person you never even met, or someone you tried to, or wish you knew more, or loved like your own family.
they’re gone. but are they dead? you hear whispers wherever you go, like a haunting melody, or a rickety creek of a staircase, or a broken pipe that wind and water can’t help but come through. it’s present; but time moves on; and you listen.
���strange, isn’t it—how someone can leave so suddenly.” was it sudden? was it?
what did you really know about them? is it an open-shut case? is something darker at play?
really, all you want to know is: what the hell happened to—
but you won’t know. it’s not a mystery you’d solve easily, maybe not one you’d solve at all. it is not YOUR story.
…but maybe it could be.
#i eat this shit up#this is my roman empire#i truly do love these kinds of books so recs would be phenomenal#i need them so bad i truly do#a good mystery??? always in style#i’ve written so many au’s or short stories like these because THEYRE SO GOOD#i’m sorry this is mostly a ramble but i really really do love these things i just wanted to ask for book recs#okay okay i’m shutting up IM SHUTTING UP#can’t catch me now by olivia rodrigo perfectly encapsulated this feeling i held#as well as the night we met but as the opposite person’ perspective if that makes sense?#i HAVE A PLAYLIST HOLD ON#you are the ghost that haunts me at night and i am the lover the liar the one left scorned#haunt me forever but don’t stop doing it is the vibes here
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