#okay im done for now byebye

[galatariel]

ELECTRIC TOUCH (From the Vault) FT. Fall Out Boy SPEAK NOW / Taylor's Version (2023

[lighthouseas]

sorry for the lack of coherent thoughts life has been like if you had a gumball machine and shook it and it exploded and all the gumballs went on the floor and people stepped on them

[isayahacts]

hi um

[phagodyke]

had a friend stay over last minute yesterday which was nice bc I hadnt seen them irl in almost a year but did my mum have to text me at 12am apropos of nothing saying she was sorry I had to have her as a mother and she knows she needs help and diagnosis and medication. Man

[n0bluev]

Somehow, im inspired to write that 'revision fic'. === (EDIT : u can skip but heres another snippet for u (3 separate bits that fit together nicely, actually haha) cuz hihi. THE AU: As i said, its a failed "3"rd regression context, where yjh is now in his "4"th round. The last memory he has of kdj is him dying, and to make things worse "In this round, that guy doesn't exist." is a thing, so yjh freaks out a bit but hes totally normal about this whole ordeal & the fact that he doesnt even remembers kdj's face now. Wdym! Hes fiiiiiine!

sorry lol back to the actual post : (,hope u enjoyed that little treat tho^^)) ===

!!THAT [Somehow, im inspired to write [...]] HAS NEVER HAPPENED TO ME BEFORE!!. I always like. do an outline for the overall story and vibe, then flesh out the start or something and cook up a little 500 (probably unsatisfying) words for fun kind of as a bonus. Keep it mostly for my private enjoyment and move on before the story comes to life. And that's okay... Yes, it would be cooler to actually write the AU ideas i get in novel or comic form instead of having them stay at just the 'sketch' & 'idea/brainstorm' phase before i get another idea and leave them to dust up in the pile,,

But yeah, its okay.

In the few years since ive started getting ideas for more elaborate aus/fics, ive noticed that my ideas improved with time. (no shit, i know, but it makes me happy! i grew up!!! i can see it.) My planning methods are better too. So all of that unfinished or abandoned stuff is not at all useless work in my eyes. And who knows, maybe one day i'll bring them back.

--> as a plus, all my fandom brainrot experiences even get transferred into my OC stuff, and frl whenever i read my notes these days (or listen to my voice memos lol) and im just like "HOW DID I THINK OF THIS WOW" or "WHEN DID I PUT THIS LIKE THIS? IT WORKS!" (not to brag or anything but my oc lore goes hard ☝️)

BUT. NOW THIS IS UNEXPECTED.

I DID NO PLANNING. I just started writing for orv and its. Lowkey, good ???? Dont get me wrong i only have 1.5k right now and there are clear holes i have to fill and stuff but... CLEAR HOLES! CLEAR HOLES. Sure Im used to being like "something of the sort should go there..." BUT THIS TIME ITS "THIS SHOULD GO THERE, ILL WRITE IT LATER BUT THE IMAGE IS IN MY MIND, CLEAR AS WATER, AND ONCE I START PUTTING IT ON THE PAGE ISTG THOSE WORDS WILL STREAM OUT OF MY FINGERS AS IF IT WAS A NORMAL OCCURENCE FOR ME" ,,- !??? Yo!

Anyways. Point is that somehow theres interesting stuff going on in my gg doc and the more i write the more i know where i want to go, so that's cool, i feel all powerfull for once

idk if that ease is going to stay once im done with the first scenes (ughh!!! theres so much potential!!!!!!!!) but hopefully yes. either way ill probably post it so im not baiting yall with a "um actually im writing smt rn --- *never shares with the class*" --- either 1) things go well and i write a "real fic" (!? wtf that wasnt my plan!) --- or 2) i only post the finished version of what i have now (expect around 5k? (i have no idea actually)) and we wait together to see if i pick up the idea again haha. (i do wish to write it tho! im not a 'writer' writer but i want to be one, u get me?)

! thank u see u byebye

[pammei]

Our moms?!

Rindou Haitani x reader (chatfic) 

Chapter 1-3 from Our moms by pammeiwammei (me) on Wattpad

❥@Rindog has followed you.

'Rindou? Followed me?' I glare at my phone deciding if i should call hina or not. "Y/n, done with homework?" "Yes mom" She looks around "Oh by the way you know my new friend Sara? Well I met one of her sons and he goes to your school so I gave him your instagram."

Oh shit.

"Mom, why would you give my instagram to a stranger?!" I yelled at her thinking about what I'm gonna do in school tomorrow.

She looked at me with disappointment "Y/n watch your tone, and there's no harm in making new friends, is this about not wanting to be friends with guys?"

There she goes jumping into conclusions again. "No mom it's just he's not the nicest in my school okay?"

She just nodded and left

☕︎Instagram dms☕︎

❥Rindog: Yo y/n, seen ya around school but never talked to ya

❥Y/n_l/n: Um yeah.. Nice to meet you ig?

❥Rindog: No need to be so awkward i know imma lil intimating but i dont hurt girls

❥Y/n_l/n: Oh my bad for assuming

❥Rindog: all good👍

7:04 seen

❥@Randog has followed you.

'Oh shit, ran too?'

♡@Y/n_l/n has been added to group chat 'bros'♡

❥@Randog: Hey y/n its nice to meet ya ;)

❥@Y/n_l/n: Uh hi? Why was i added?

❥@Rindog: Ran wanted to meet ya Sorz for not askin before adding ya

'Why do they type like that tf'

❥@Randog: Its okay broski they shouldn't be offended over this LMAO

'Broski? BYE THE RED FLAGS'

❥@Y/n_l/n: Sorry my moms calling i gtg byebye.

❥@Rindog: See bro ya scared them away

☕︎Instagram dms☕︎

❥@Rindog: Hey sorry for ran he doesnt know how to talk to girls 4:28 seen Yo im real sorry if we offended ya 5:13 seen

❣︎ Meanwhile on the call with Hina and Emma:

"Why are they so desperate HELP" both I and Hina laugh at Emma's comment on the brothers.

"I don't know man but this whole thing is very suspicious, like how they keep dming me," I say as I try to clean my room "I mean it's funny how thirsty the popular guys are."

"Y/n, Sara just called and told me you've been ignoring her son." mom informs me as I try to hold my laugh

as soon as my mom left my room I look at the screen to see Emma and Hina looking like the skull emoji, then we all laughed so fucking hard I started choking.

"THEY-- REALlY TOLD THEIR- MOM PFFTTT." Emma said as we all started choking and snorting.

❣︎

@Y/n_l/n has added @drakens_bae4life, @Hina_Hanagaki to group chat 'bros'

❥@Randog: who the hell?

❥@drakens_bae4life: really? randog? 💀

❥@Randog: stfu

❥@Hina_Hanagaki: can yall not fight? 😕

❥@Randog can you shut up? 🥺

❥@Rindog: ran shut up for a second

❥@Randog: you a simp? │ ↳ ❥@Rindog: bro 💀  im just being nice bruh chill

♥︎@Randog is typing♥︎ ♡@Randog was kicked♡ ♡@drakens_bae4life was kicked♡ ♡@Hina_Hanagaki was kicked♡

❥@Rindog: y/n i understand that ran is an asshole sometimes hes just a lil messed in the head ya know? dont take the things he says to heart, he probs doesnt mean them just dont argue with him like if things go too far he might hurt you or your friends physically so just bear with him alr?

❥@Y/n_l/n: wow that kinda really nice of you to say thanks ill try but i am a little bit sensitive:(

❥@Rindog: completely understandable if anything he says or does bothers you just dm me ill deal with it Y/n reacted with a '❤︎' 5:48 seen

❣︎

"Y/n you're really quiet what's happening?" Hina asks,

"Rin's actually kinda nice.." I say awkwardly knowing it's gonna surprise them.

"who the fuck are you because you're not Y/n," Emma replied.

" Y/n, ARE YOU BLUSHING? GOODBYE GET SOME REST YOU NEED IT." Emma said and soon after left Hina also left not long after.

❥@Rindog: [link to a server]

❥@Y/n_l/n: sorryz i dont use discord 😋

❥@Rindog: want me to make ya an account?

❥@Y/n_l/n: forsure go ahead

❥@Rindog: user: bald ran#6969 password:ilovecatssm36

❥@Y/n_l/n: you like cats? nice

❥@Rindog: i mean sure but i just picked a random pass

❥@Y/n_l/n: logging in now ❤︎Read 10:19❤︎ As you log in you notice the two people in your friends list 'rindog#6969' and 'randawg#0690'. wow they really need new usernames.

☕︎Discord dms☕︎

❥Rindog: yo :wavingpenis:

❥bald ran: woah hi :catcrying: wait do i have the nitro thing or something?

❥Rindog: yeah thought ya might like it

❥bald ran: stop you didnt have tooooooo im gonna have to pay you back☹️

❥Rindog: NONO dont worry consider it a gift :)

☕︎Instagram groupchat: two married and one single person☕︎

❥@Y/n_l/n: EMMMA HINNAAAAAAAAAAJAJAHSHWHAHAU MEOWWQWWWWWWWWW

(Pretend you see the emotes.)MEOW RAWR MEOWMEOW

❥Hina: OH MY @EMMA LOOK ❥Emma: what? WHAT THE FUCK Y/N Y/N Y/N Y/N REPLY RIGHT FUCKING NOW

❥Y/n: meow ���

❥Emma: y/n

❥Y/n: what

❥Emma: you downloaded discord for him? i thought you were over that app after your e dating phase🤨

❥Y/n: BUT HE MADE ME AN ACCOUNT I COULDNT SAY NO

❥Hina: also tell that ran bitch to go eat dick he was suck a dick to me last time😢

❥Y/n: yeah forsure hina

❥Emma: downloading discord rn i was talking to mikey about what happened and he said theres a toman server. drakens there

❥Hina: INVITE ME TOO

☕︎Discord dms: Randawg#0690☕︎

❥bald ran: eat dick (from my friend you argued with last time)

❥randawg: bitch what send addy rn pussyio

❥bald ran youre not scaring anyone LMAO

❥randawg: jeez ok😢

"Y/n Sara just called, im disappointed why would you ever be mean to my friends son?" aint no way "💀"

☕︎Discord dms: Rindog#6969☕︎

❥bald ran: can you and your brother stop telling your mom that im being mean to you guys, i cant play roblox for a week now

❥Rindog: ran did that?🤭

❥bald ran: yes

❥Rindog: brb beating him up

❥bald ran: alright cya goodnight:)

❥Rindog: oh youre sleeping already? goodnight:) ❤︎Reacted with ♡❤︎

[enlighten3d]

More Oc lore

ummmm no reference picture for him yet but John Doe, the real name of the stag who is the cult leader.

He is the gayest gay to ever gay

he basically was just some white guy in the 70s chilling with his boyfriend until he saw the horrors and kind of went insane. He sacrificed a few people and when his boyfriend found out he said he did it for “gay rights” (it’s kinda coverup to make himself look good) and he wants to destroy the universe. His boyfriend Kenneth absolutely being distraught about this fact broke up with him and decided to “fix” him with the ✨power of friendship ✨but that only resulting in one night stands with him or one of his friend is dying. eventually Kenneth dies from ingesting a potion which is somewhat curse so John goes why the hell not, retrieves his corpse from a morgue and preserves his body in a glass case, like any good boyfriend.

he is also have deer motif, and most of his right hand men/ plane travelers have prey symbolism

so uhhhh yeah very silly, he hasn’t done anything wrong (committed genocide in multiple universes) and if he did he was feeling a bit goofy

...JOHN DOE?? JOHN DOE ? LIKE JOHN DOE FROM MALEVOLENT- sorry im insane about malevolent. theres a.. guy who names himself john doe. qjsndjfhsjfjskckd. (i am aware that its a rly common placeholder name !! just when insane for a hot sec when i saw it ahdndkdjfjsjd)

okay.. cult leader is john doe. fascinating .

oh boy !! sacrificial murder in the name of gay rights, definitely definitely. bro saw the horrors and is not sane. very logical on his part /s. byebye universe ! its impossible to stop gay people so the universe is fucked ig /silly

KENNETH. MATE. 'i can fix him..' no the FUCK you cannot. rip kenneths friends ig. and kenneth too ! this is what happens when you fuck a cult leader who wants to destroy everything (why does he wish to do so, if i may ask..)

aand hes sleeping beauty now. checks out ! is he gonna use kenneth for some sort of Ritual.......

OOOH fascinating... symbolism !! beloved! 💥

hes. so silly. definitely. thats so normal of him. /s

guy needs to go to therapy and jail or get killed

FUCK the IRONY THO... hes a genocidal megalomaniac who has a motif of prey. thats insane. bcs if anth hes the predator here. smth smth wolf in sheeps clothing... amazing

this is beautiful

[mars101]

Act 3: -> Scene 2: about that..

WRITTEN PART -> (0.8) -> no ss after text

"oh no, what if im too slow omg"

yin was currently dashing towards the entrance of the small hotel. her quick steps leaving behind a trail of dust, lies of course but she's still sprinting pretty fast.

she eventually reached the entrance where she saw three familiar looking men standing around the small outdoor area. before heading out to greet them she looks in a nearby mirror to tidy up herself after running to where she's at currently.

“can i help you guys?”

excitement fills yin's body as she approaches the three men. her hands sweating behind her back as she's having trouble with the fact that she's looking at her possible father.

“Ah yes, we're here for the wedding! I'm Lee Juyeon”

“Lee Hyunjae”

“Kim Younghoon.. you are expecting us right?”

“yes! welcome, it's good that you all made it”

The three men look at the familiar features of Yin, “Are you.. Y/n's daughter..?” Younghoon asks Yin as he takes a small step forward.

“Of course she's Y/n's daughter! Look at her she looks just like her, Yin right?”

yin gasps at the fact that juyeon knows her name, “omg how do you know my name?” her hand lightly covers her mouth as she looks over at him.

“Hmmm lucky guess, I had an aunt that lived here with the same name”

“oh? im named after a yin..who lived.. here..”

the two of them tilted their heads in confusion.

“hmmm….”

“Is it alright if we head to the room now? I feel like we should ready ourselves before we see your mom, it's been a while for all of us..”

“oh right! uhm lets go there now, wait- lets go through the side instead of the main entrance.. its a shortcut..”

Yin led the men torwards their makeshift room in the attic of the garden's backhouse. She didn't want her mom to notice their names on the list of guests in the hotel so she made the place as cozy as possible for them. Which wasn't a problem considering Yin and Y/n always kept it clean.

“Oh… Uhm, can we go to our room now..?”

Juyeon pats Younghoon on the shoulder, “I'm pretty sure this is our room, it's cute by the way.” He then lays on one of the “beds” that Yin set up, getting cozy.

“thank you and uhm.. there's one tiny small thing i gotta tell you..i sent the invites my mom doesn't know anything..hehe”

“Oh god..”

“okay well i think this would be a good surprise for my mom since well she's done so much for me and she's always talking about you guys and the good old days,” lies. “and i thought what what an amazing surprise for her.. that you are all going to be at my wedding..”

Younghoon sighs and plops down on the bed Juyeon was laying on, “Look Yin, if it was you who sent the letter then I can't be here. Last time I saw your mom she said she never wanted to see me again

“well that was years ago! please, it would mean a lot to me..”

“Why?-”

“look, when i sent the invites i didn't even know if any of you would even see them. but the fact that all three of you are here after seeing my mom's name on the letter means something…doesn't it?”

Groans and chuckles were shared among the three men at the words of Yin, “You are just like your mother do you know that? Such trouble”

“hey! i love hearing that i'm just like her, i'm very proud about it”

Just then, Y/n's humming is heard from outside of the place. The men perk up at the sound of her, “Is that..?”

“yes! but..stay quiet, make sure she doesn't see you guys” yin opens up a window and moves to hop out, “Yin do you need help?” “oh im good, done this many times before. please make sure you come to my wedding byebye!” she hops out of the window, closing it with a slam.

as she fixes herself while on the ground she notices karina and yuna behind a tree waving her over. with a confused look she heads over to them, “are you guys ‘hiding’?? you are two people behind a single tree” yuna shushes her, “shh, we followed your mom here, are they in there?”

“yes they’re in there, i’ve never been so nervous in my life”

“you proposed.”

“and for that i was more excited..anyways-”

“do you know which one is your dad?”

“about that..”

the girls roll their eyes at yin, “go figure, omg we expected this

“babe, it’s only been a few minutes how would i know??”

“okay miss “ill know it when i see them” you are a liarrr”

their conversation was cut short when they hear the door being slammed open and they see y/n bolting out, eyes slowly filling with tears.

“wtf happened…”

synopsis = a day before her wedding day, Yin decides to find her father so he can walk her down the isle, the problem? There's three candidates: Lee Juyeon, Kim Younghoon, and Lee Hyunjae.

last/next

masterlist

taglist:

@boomhoon, @sanasour, @loonaluvz, @jaerisdiction, @cowsmicwu, @jundundun

[tonydaddingham]

✨ episode 5 - running commentary✨

- this episode better be the one to Alter My Brain Chemistry, I NEED AN explanation for the too fast for me scene pls

- THEY BETTER KISS I S2G

- right okay hi shax I hate you 😘 but Miranda is killing WAIT TEN THOUSAND WHAT THATA OVERKILL ITS ONE SILLY BILLY ANGEL AND A DUMB ASS DEMON

- "can I watch" crowley TONE IT DOWN KINKY BOY

- "there will be sandwiches" LOL IM IN BABES

- DOCTOR WHO lmao harpischord guy get fucking SERVED

- HES JUST TEMPTED SOMEONE AND GIVEN AWAY A BOOK??? my guy going through some ROUGH character development

- hell is literally so understaffed wtf

- MAGIC SHOP AGAIN YES

- ERDNASE REFERENCE ERDNASE REFERENCE

- Crowley is so proud of his husband BUT THAT FEZ NEEDS TO GOOOOO

- neil if you ever read this pls can we have aziraphale be a permanent party planner bc he does the mostest and pls ignore my criticism of ep1 and 2 I take it all back pls pls more aziraphale planning tf out of shit

- SHAX MOMMY YES💅💅💅 ALSO ERIC MY BELOVED My sweet baby boy

- FRENCH AZIRAPHALE YOU NEED TO STOP crowley is FED UP he looks like a kid whose mum got caught chatting at the supermarket

- aziraphale pls stop

- NINA KNOWS WHATS UP GAY SPOTS GAY

- no crowley don't make that face no why why why WHY YOU LOOKING LIKE THAT😭😭😭✨ he loves you CROWLEY YOU BLIND FUCKKNG IDIOT and you love HIM you emotionally stunTED APE

- the glasses and sideburns are still BUGGING ME someone explain did he go shOPPING OFF SCREEN????

- ERIC NO BYEBYE MY LOVERRRRR

- wow that was a long pre credit bit wtf

- DATE???? oh no crowley is pulling away no no no

- "SMUT?" fucking OKAY??? DO IT THEN YOU PUSSY ASS BITCH✨💓

- fuck they're about to have a Conversation aren't they and get drunk and it's about to get EMOTIONAL

- Crowley FUCK

- CROWLEY BOO

- "friend" ok lol

- he's about to throw mf HANDS but goob is so innocent NO WAIT CROWLEY NO DOMT DO THAT oh thank fuck

- matchbox ajamakajalam sns

- lmao the growth that Crowley just did in 30 seconds gave me WHIPLASH

- Muriel no pls don't do it bbygirl💓💓 OH GOD YOUVE GONE DONE IT NOW

- ah Jim's mug

- DECORATING MIRACLES YES BABY

- WAIT AND SEE ✨✨✨✨

- oh aziraphale I love u so MUCH 😭😭😭

- Mrs sandwich I LOVE HER no aziraphale don't ask pls bby

- CROWLEY WHAT U SNIFFIN HONEY UR LIKE A BLOODHOUND FOR TROUBLE WHAT A POWER

- GOOB YOU ARE FABULOUS DARLING I LOVE JT✨

- "you young people"

- F BOMB FUCK YES

- oh no Maggie no not you CROWLEY YOU HERO GOD BLESS tell em babes

- lmao are they even gonna get to dance this is so stressful

- Mrs sandwich just chill out honey you are a madam SEX WORK IS VALID REAL WORK I said what I said

- "have a vol au vent" SO MARRIED💓

- omg am i now liking Maggie and nina hmmmmmmm AZIRAPHALE'S FACE crowley you could have that IF YOU EVEN TRIED MY GUY

- I HAVE SUCH JACKET ENVY LMAOOOO goob you are the only valid character

- WHAT no stop goob stop

- fuck OFF THEY ACTUALLY SANCE FUXK KM SWEATINF NOOOOOOK💓💓💓💓💓💓💓💓💓💓

- AHHHHHHHHHHHHH BOYS PLEASE

- well fuck that's put a spanner in the works

- aziraphale go fucking NAILS GET THEIR ASS oh that's not good✨

- GOOBY NO BE QUIET SHHHHHH

- GOOB NO

- NO GOOB

- the mf coat is SPECTACULAR ✨✨✨✨ did they spend the whole budget on it???? HES SO FABULOUS AND FRUITY

- oh my god the miracle is working against them fuck

- the fact that the humans are just chilling lmaoooo

- NEIL WE NEED CROWLEY AS A LAWYER PLS THANK U they just got SEVRED✨💓

- lmao IT WAS FAKE HAHAHAHAHA

- Mr brown shut up pipe down back in your box

- see that's what you get when you run your mouth

- IS THIS EVERY

- CMON GIVE ME EVERY

- oh my god crowley is the PATRON VIRGIN saint of sex work I LIVE FOR IT god bless or maybe not

- IS THAT A PRAISE KINK I SEE

- "rescuing me makes him so happy" FUCKING DECEASED

- Muriel lmao we know this it's ok bby take HIM TO HEAVEN IN THE ANGEL-ON-THE-ASS TRACKSUIT

- the MUSIC OKAY ITS GOOD NOW YES YES YES✨

- GOING UP

- I'm dead

[amulieee]

okay i just made a post thingy but I NEED TO KNOW WHY MY TUMBLR BLOG LOOKS SO BORING and why is tumblr ONLY SMUT

ah yes fancy line going through words i’ve figured tumblr out well done me (id like a round of applause)

also i’ve been on tumblr for like A YEAR NOW and ive only just discovered the art of posting SO IDK WHAT TO DO

also do people even post random shit on here (sorry ladies) cause what if like a really cool tumblr lady finds this and is super repelled by it and talks to all her cool tumblr lady friends and have me added to the tumblr lady blacklist THAT SOUNDS SO SAD I DONT WANT THAT TO HAPPEN☹️ but anyway im doing that now so i hope the tumblr ladies find this and take pity on me and introduce me to the art of tumblr PLEASE

oh yeah back to my question HOW DO I MAKE THIS LOOK LESS BLAND cause so many people have like really cool looking blogs and it makes me FILLED WITH RAGE (at myself) that i cant figure tumblr out so now im gonna like watch a youtube tutorial and maybe make a tumblr introduction (cause people still do that right (RIGHT?))

byebye ladies

[todayisawthewhxlewxrld]

I THINK I FORGOT TO SEND MY ASK??? IDK 😭

dude axel my dad woke me up at 4 IN THE FUCKING MORNING BECAUSE MY DOG HAD TO GO PEE AND MY DAD WAS ALREADY AWAKE 😭 LIKE IF YOU WERE AWAKE WHY WOULD YOU WAKE ME UP🫠

anyway im probably gonna fail spanish cause theres this project (idek what it’s about) and i havent started it yet 😆 goodbye honor roll🥲

SHIT DUDE IM ON THE TRAIN THAT I TAKE TO SCHOOL AND I JUST REALIZED I LEFT MY SCIENCE HOMEWORK AT HOME 😰😰 i was finally going to turn in my missing assignment 🫠 OH MY GOD SPEAKING OF SCIENCE GUESS WHO IS FAILING 😆 my parents are probably going to cut my allowance 🫠

ANYWAY MY FAVORITE MOVIE IS HOWLS MOVING CASTLE‼️ as for movie genres im honestly not sure I just know that I LOVEE romance movies like UGHWGDH oh or like specific 80’s movies (like breakfast club and 16 candles)

OKAY ANYWAY THATS ALL FOR NOW ILYSM BYEBYE💗💗

-bambi (HELP I ALMOST MISSPELLED MY TAG IS bmaib)

I HATEEEE WHEN PPL DO THAT like u couldn’t have just done it for me at that point since u were AWAKE ???? 😒😒💔💔

HELP WHEN IS THE PROJECT DUE ??? MAYBE U STILL HAVE TIME N CAN FIGURE IT OUT!!

NAURRRR NOT THE FORGETTING UR SCIENCE HW 💔💔 tbh tho i don’t blame u for failing science bc science was not my strong suit. cough none of my classes were jesus i failed so many classes don’t be like me cough

HOWLS MOVING CASTLE IS SO GOOD!! and no one is doing it like 80’s movies anymore… i get it…

BYEBYE ILYM

[churbo]

happy fugo day everybody

[ashenworth]

ououououo carrd update

patch notes:

- luci moved to main w/ miles hehe

- removed 1 f/o, finally moved 1 f/o from crushes up to secondary

- unimportant extra info added to dni section

- familial and platonic section has been made even more confusing :)

[the-autism-mascot]

okay because im back on my tua bullshit. i need to talk to you all about five and his queerness + neurodivergency.

FIRST OFF. starting with his gender cause this is kinda the one i put the least amount of thought into. i think he is agender i think he uses he/him pronouns just out of convenience. i think at one point like klaus or something used they/them for him on accident and he was like huh. i dont mind that actually. but didnt care enough to actually like officially make it a Thing. i think maybe klaus or viktor at aome point tried to have a Gender Talk with them and they tolerated it for like five minutes begote being like “oh my fucking god i do not give a shit. use whatever pronouns you want now leave me alone” and that was kinda the end of that

SEXUALITY. OKAY. this one i have a lot of feelings about. so they are aroace. in my heart it is true. I KNOW. I KNOW HE HAD A WIFE. HOWEVER. consider the circumstances. mans ran away when he was 13 years old. he never really talked to anyone other than his siblings even before that. i don’t think he fully understood what romance was (ESPECIALLY CONSIDERING HE DIDNT HACE LIKE. PARENTS WHO WERE IN LOVE TO OBSERVE) at that point. all he knew was that peoplr who spend their lives together get married because theyre “in love” or something. and he never really got the chance to learn what romantic love is. because yknow. he didnt talk to anyone for half a century. but they are so so so so lonely and their mind is so desperate for company that they make themself a companion. i think hr was like 20 or something when he found delores? idk. but in his mind this is someone who he wants yo spend all of his time with so obviously hes going to do whatever a Romance is. (thus is simplified obviously he has some idea of what romance is but i think he didnt fully get that it’s like. something that’s different from familial love.) so yeah he married delores but i dont think he loved her romantically. honestly he doesn’t ever perform any specifically romantic behavior? it’s obvious he cares for her (has an unhealthy attatchment to her really) but he never really. he just treats her like a really good friend. which idk maybe thats just how five woulf do romance but it just doesn’t feel that way to me. with the aroace thing i dont think he ever really puts a label on it because he basically refuses to talk about delores with his siblings so there’s never really an opportunity for them to be like Five That’s Just What Having A Friend Is. but yeah. five aroace and its important to me

okay last thing. his autism. i spent a while like really conflicted about whether or not he’s autistic. i wasn’t sure if he was jusy Like That because he’s been alone for 45 years but no. im rewatching now and he’s just incredibly autistic. like. i would have to make a whole other post to talk about how autistic they are. but its important thay they’re autistic. autism yeaaaaaaaa.

ok im done. five important. byebye

[babysizedfics]

the first time vee regressed in therapy (and meeting michael after)

NOTE: this is almost 2k words... so it continues under the cut. No TWs!

for the first few sessions of vees therapy with dr picani, patton is in the room with them because of vee's selective mutism, so patton hung around to help translate for vee during seasions until she is able to speak for herself, and thru these firsts sessions emile sees how attached the two are to each other

and after about three or four weeks, once vee can reliably talk for herself, patton stil sits in the waiting room so if vee needs him he's there

im their first session without patton, emile actually prompts vee to tell him what she calls her uncle patton. she says "patton" but emile is like do u not call him uncle? and she hesitates bc she definitely doesnt call him uncle but she hates lying

and emile smiles knowing that she doesnt. then he asks "are there any other names you call your uncle, vee?" because unbeknown to vee, emile actually heard her call patton "dad" one day in the waiting room

she is made rlly nervous by this question but emile assures her he isnt trying to trick her or anything, he just wants her to be honest. and after some more coaxing she whispers that she calls patton "dad" and emile is like thats lovely

and suddenly vee is teary and panicky because shes scared emile is being sacastic or will quiz her about it, but he insists that its very nice that she is comfy calling patton that and that they are so close and it makes vee feel a lot safer

but that prompts emile to start asking her about her biological father, janus. has she ever called him dad or was he always janus? does she know why that is?

vee really tries her best to stay calm and answer, but the questions suddenly get too much and before she knows it virgil goes non-verbal bc she realises she is starting to regress

emile notices vee's distress and changes his voice like softer and more clear. he asks what is wrong, he assures her they dont need to talk about anything vee doesnt want to talk about. Can you breathe with me? Good thank you, can you talk? No thats alright you dont have to. Is there anything he can do to make her feel safe?

and the soft caring words just push vee compeltely into half regression and she starts fully crying, tears spilling down her cheeks and shaky breaths and little squeaks and sniffles and tightly cuddling her softie she took with her (a lilac octopus, dr violet)

after a couple minutes of just crying and emile givinf her some space to let it out, the tears arent slowing down. so she cries " i w-wan pa-p-p-..." giving up after she realises her voice is definitely little now

"what do you want, vee?" emile prompts so so kindly that it just makes vee's chest ache

she whimpers "w-wan papa" and trails off in sobs

and emile instantly knows she means patton. he very easily rolls with this infantile behaviour, being a child therapist a lot of the time. he just sees her acting like a toddler and he immediately thinks okay time to turn on the toddler therapy, no questions asked

emile stands up carefully and speaks clear and gentle "okay vee. dr picani is leaving for just a moment to get your papa, okay? I'll be back very soon" and vee just squeaks through her tears, so he hurries out to the waiting room to fetch patton

pat literally jumps from his seat when emile calls him in saying vee is upset and practically runs through the corridor and into the office. he immediately pulls her into a one armed cuddle on the couch while emile just closes the door rlly gentle for privacy and hands a box of tissues to patton. so patton softly shushes his baby and wipes her tears away while emile takes quick notes in his book

patton is rlly quietly shushing her and comforting her, trying to be discreet. emile notices that this is obviously a common occurence, and also notices that patton seems to be holding back something

so when patton looks up briefly and catches emiles gaze, emile just smiles and speaks softly "do you know what age regression is, patton?"

and patton breathes a massive sigh of relief and hugs vee tighter "yeah... yeah we do"

and emile nods and smiles a little sympathetic looking back at vee and patton jumps right back to comforting her, not trying to be discreet this time, going full papa mode now that he has the confirmation that emile knows about regression

patton lifts a still crying vee into his lap and cuddles her to his chest and rocks her. "its alright, baby, shh shhh, papas got you" (vee still crying and grabbing pattons shirt tightly) "i know i know, baby, youre ok"

then emile adds in softly "youre doing very well vee" and patton smiles at him then repeats for vee "did you hear dr picani? he said youre doing sooo well! youre so so brave, hunnybunny"

and eventually when vee is comforted enough and the tears have stopped, emile raises his eyebrows questioningly at patton and pat talks to vee: "vee, are you ready to talk to dr picani again?"

she whimpers and grips patton tighter. "its okay babygirl, papas not going anywhere..." patton hesitstes and looks up at emile a little worried "uh, as long as thats alright with dr picani"

emile nods and smiles softly when vee peeks over her softie at him "of course. you can do whatever you want vee, if having your dad - or your papa here makes you feel safer then of course he can stay. would you like patton to stay so you can feel safer?"

vee doesnt respond but frowns and hides behind dr violet again, and emile looks to patton

patton explains gently "we need simpler language than that for her when she's regressed."

"oh my apologies..." emile starts, then tries again. "Vee?" he waits for vee to lower her softie from her eyes again to show shes listening. "Do you still want your papa?"

vees shoulders are tensed and shes hugging her softie so tight, still hiding partially behind it, but she nods a little

and so they continue with patton in the room

throughout the session she is REALLY shy of emile in this headspace but emile is just rly gentle and treats her like an actual young child while she sits in pattons lap and tries to interact with him, so emile manages to coax some stuff from her. and is shocked to find that this seems to be a headspace that actuslly allows vee to be more open and honest with him even if her language is limited

he asks her how does she feel right now? its okay if she doesnt know. is she scared? thats okay, it is very scary. she's being so brave. but is papas lap soft and warm? thats very nice! does it make her feel safe? does it help her tears go away? well thats good to hear, we dint want you to be sad. do you love papa? Can you show me how much? Woah that's a lot!!

and once vee has calmed down a lot and giggled a little at how nice dr picani is being to her, emile sees vee start to suck her thumb

unfortunately its not sanitary for her to suck her thumb in oublic since she must have touched surfaces, and pat brings her thumb away and desperately apologizes when vee whines and starts tearing up when papa wont let her suck her thumb. she dorsnt have her pretty paci so what else is she meant to do!

then emile announces in a very babytak voice. "vee, can you guess what I have in my desk drawer? Haha No, not frogs. Look!" and he pulls out a handful of lollipops! all different colours! and vee starts bouncign a little on papas lap and smiling

with a quick check that she has no allergies (egg, but there aint no egge in lollipops) emile lets her pick a flavor/color then givs it to her to suck on

patton needs to hold it for her though in case she accidentally swallows it, so her lil hands are just holdin gently on papas hand as he holds the lollipop for her and her legs are swingin, dangling down from papas lap bc she happy stims when she is eatin sweets by kicking her feet!

nearing the end of the session emile tells vee how good ahe's been answering al his questions and being well behaved for her papa. so he lets her pick a sticker to prove how good she was today!

but she doesn't want to touch the sticky or have it one her pretty dress, so patton asks her to point to her favourite and papa can pick it up for her. but shes too shy to pick one

so papa chooses one for her, a puffy pink kitty, then puts it on his nose to make her giggle. shes shy abt giggling in front of emile and buries her face on papas shoulder and patton cradles her head and coos and emile just watches all of this rly softly

and then their time is up and patton smiles and pats vee's leg and asks if she wants to be carried and she shakes her head with a proud smile. patton gasps "are you gonna be a big girl and walk on your own?"

then vees smile drops and she whines and grabs pats hand and patton giggles "no no not completely on your own. paps gonna hold your hand baby" so she nods and they get up with patton holding her hand

then patton says goodbye to emile and thanks him for being so kind to vee, and emile says "my pleasure. i'll see you next week vee!"

vee squeezes her papas hand and shuffles behind him a little. but she waves her softies tentacle at emile to say goodbye and emile smiles and waves to them "byebye dr violet, make sure you keep vee safe and happy this week!" and vee giggles and patton leads her outside

in the waiting room vee is much more closed off because theres the receptionist and a couple other clients in there so she just keeps her eyes down while papa signs them out - then she hears a slightly deep voice say "oh, I really like your stuffie"

vee doesnt really know how to react, she looks up a little and sees dark blue jeans and thick legs and vans sneakers but then quickly tugs pattons hand and steps behind him to hide from the stranger

"Thank you! It was a 'well done for going to therapy' gift from me" patton says cheerfully, and vee starts stroking his fingers as a comfort stim

"aw that's sweet!" the stranger says just as joyful as patton... so vee feels okay looking up now that she knows this stranger wasnt trying to make fun of her

she only catches some shaggy brown hair and a tshirt with what looks like a horror film image on it that she doesnt recognise. she doesnt dare make eye contact but she can tell the stranger is smiling at her

and she cant talk, shes too little, but shes not little enough to not understand whats happening. so she lets go of pattons hand bruefly to sign "thank you" then quickly grabs his hand again, feeling her cheeks warm and looking back to the ground

"you're welcome!" the stranger says, still happy, so vee smiles a little, then tugs pattons hand and looks up at him pleadingly

patton is beaming, his cheeks bunched in the biggest smile. "ready to go, sweetie?" vee nods "okay, here we go. It was lovely meeting you..."

"michael!"

"michael" patton smiles and holds out his other hand to shake michaels hand. "im patton and this is vee! have a good night!"

"you too, patton!" michael bids as patton and vee start walking away. then the voice soeaks again "bye vee!"

vee doesnt respond but she smiles and pulls dr violet up to hide it

patton leads her out to the parking lot and as he buckles her seatbelt for her he presses a big kiss to her cheek "im so so proud of you, babygirl"

and the whole ride home patton speaks softly and recaps what was good about theraoy this week. he does it to reinforce with vee that this is a good thing to do.

he talks about how lovely dr picani was and how he already knew what regression was. he talks about how funny his jokes were and how much she giggled. and her lollipop and her sticker - which they just realised was still on pattons nose and laughed about. and he talked about the lovely boy in the waiting room who liked vee's softie!

and the whole time vee is smiling and giggling and blushing and getting closer to full regression so that when they get home vee is just a bouncy wiggly giggly baby all night

[survivormontenegro]

Episode 9: “-28... negative. 28. negative. twenty. eight.” - Jason

i'm fully a psycho, i practiced my acting in the mirror to pretend I accidentally voted Ian. its a mess. a REAL mess. and I might have done it for no reason, they took it super well so maybe I... shouldn't tell Jason...

i literally am why Ian left. I wanted him out since round two, and I made it happen even though nobody wanted it to. I FINALLY ACTUALLY MADE A MOVE IN A GAME. I FINALLY DID SOMETHING I'M SO HAPPY asldfa. I could CRY, I can leave this game happy.

um da fuck alalkdgh well I aldlkj so alkjdfc;l.

^ decipher thats all I got.

No honestly I don't know what to think right now. Everyone went crazy last tribal and I feel like I need to explain myself a little bit? First off my alliance voted someone oppositely of what they told me they'd do. And secondly, they used me as a total fallback. And what made it me CRACKED asf was that they told me none of it. Like we talked in the morning about how shit was going to go down tonight and decided on Jason. We were all in agreement and it was in motion. Later Tom asked me what the vote was and I was told to tell him Ian. Except Alex told me that he told him Me. Without warning me. At all. Which is like shitty. So I kinda got paranoid and started asking around and seeing what was what, and thats when Tom came up to me and said that there was a big blindside to vote me off led by Alex. Of course, my initial thought was that this could be happening and he made this big plan to vote off Alex and I talked to Ali about it but ULTIMATELY I decided to go with Jason as I promised. My mistake I guess was telling Jones, who I really trusted, saying that they wanted to make a move on Alex but I trusted him and said I voted Jason. I only said so because I was worried that it might fall through and I might need to be saved by her idol. Which I know is hers of course and I don't want to dictate when she can use it but with this insanity going around I just was really nervous. But honestly I can't believe that Alex and them all just decided against voting Jason without telling me. They said it was to save me, which of course is true, but they didn't tell me. And it was SHITTY for Alex to not tell me that he threw my name to Tom, like truly dumb. I know I've said I might want him out soon a lot, but honestly I HAVE NO IDEA what I'm going to be doing with the next tribal. I do wanna say tho that I like him as a person a whole lot! He's sweet and loyal and really kind, I just think he's gonna end up dominating this game if people let him.

PS I don't know if Julia has a problem with me. We were suppose to be voting together for Jason, and while she doesn't owe me anything, she just wouldn't talk to me. Like I think I wouldn't have CRACKED so hard if I could just reach her and get a grip on how she was voting.

She's being chaotic on purpose but only to me? I don't get it.

okay I'm off the alliance call. I just sent a really like emo paragraph to my hostchat but I'm so happy, which is gross because I just did Ian so dirty but lemme explain.

I have played 7 games before this (3 Survivor, 4 Big Brother) - I've come 2nd in five of those games, and without exception I have never EVER played a game I'm proud of. I always make fun of my game for being crap. Like I'm always a goat, always crap, and always play passively.

I'm so excited about this season and this game because... I'm finally playing the game and a game I am proud of. Like I'm not fussed about winning or making FTC, because lets be real, it fully is not happening, but I wanna leave the season proud of my game. And I already so am, like... I've wanted Ian out since round two, and I've been determined to make it happen.

And I did that. I literally was angling to get him out via a vote switch and then when the vote split came up, I knew exactly what to do. I knew Ian would be less willing to make amends and more able to make connections. I knew Ian was a threat and so urgently needed to be removed because he could keep a grip on the game.

I can't believe that. In a tribe of twelve people, where nobody wanted Ian out (the four votes for him were all just for the sake of a vote split), and I singlehandedly forced it through. I saw a target, knew to make a move and got them out. IM SO HAPPY.

in other news... I am a psycho, I literally went to a mirror, practised how to look shocked and then went on that call and acted my HEART OUT. I think people bought it, but it is. the. most. cracked. thing. I. have. ever. done.

I'm now kinda stuck, because I have two options. Either I tell Jason what I did earning his trust, or I just... try and work with Jason without telling him. One is riskier with more potential long term benefit, and one is a much safer bet. I am gonna think on it and decide tomorrow.

Also I was really mean about Jones, Mo & Alex in my confessionals earlier. I take it back, on calls they are so FUN. I think they just aren't texting people so I don't judge. Doesn't mean I necessarily wanna go too far with them, but I love them as people and feel bad for being mean.

also since this round solidified that much as I'm proud of my game, I'm not making FTC, I'd rank people in the order I'd vote for them as a juror as:

Jules > Alex > Mitch > Tom > Benj > Jones > Julia > Jason > Caeleb > Mo

Jules/Alex/Mitch seem very switched on, Tom making it to the end would be a real underdog journey, Benj is a king and has the right idea with an undercover duo, Jones/Julia savvy queens, Jason actually also has an underdog story we will need to see with that one, Caeleb telling Jones about the Alex plan is a real dumb move imo which lowers his rank for me. Mo is my SON and I love him but would need to see more game from him to be comfortable voting him at FTC in any scenario.

also ian talking about dom not deserving to win switzerland set off kill bill red flags for me. nobody who talks about dom negatively lives to tell the tale, you go BYEBYE. but also ian ilysm, like you were a major threat and had to go, but on a personal level i love you with my whole heart.

okay last confessional for now, the two moods:

June 30th yeehaw

July 2nd

Extra notes:

Benj and i are working on the idol hunt together and I’m already on like,, 30 w him so it’s gucci, I’m not gonna tell Alex ab it or anything bc I kinda wanna try and stray away from him a bit?? Like he doesn’t have to know EVERYTHING Ab my advantages yk?

And I’m probs not gonna try and use the vote cover on anyone rn bc every single one of my allies is like,,, up for exposure???? So that’s wacky,,

Also bc Ian was absolutely ROBBED of jury we’re thinking it’s a F2

Bc OF COURSE IT IS which I’m not mad ab but I have to think ab who i’d Really want to sit with,,, best case scenario for me is probs Benj,, maybe Mo? Not too sure,, but um ya barbecue sauce on my thiddies here we go into f11 onward and upward amirite

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RGv10gbJxVU

this was b4 tribal 

So I lost Ian... and I'm kinda mad about it! I can't help but feel like I'm on my way to the jury because even the next day people are still acting super weird with me. I don't really understand how I'm a threat to anyone right now though??? Like I guess the Me/Ian power duo thing was valid but Ian's gone now so that argument should be moot.

I have no idea what to do moving forward. Up this point my game has been based on how I interpret conversations with people and how much I thought I could trust them... but I can't do shit if no one wants to talk to me (and I cannot stress ENOUGH how much sense this doesn't make).

The one good thing about me staying in the game I guess is I now have free reign to do whatever the fuck I want with my time left here. If I can blow up as many games as possible and stir the pot as much as I can at least I go out having fun?? Right?? But bottom line is I fully intend on lone-wolfing this game for however long I'm still here for.

My current first steps are to first throw Julia under the bus to Caeleb, and hopefully get something going with Caeleb. If I'm in with Caeleb, it might help with Alex, Jones, and Mo using me as a number.

Next is to pretty much sell my soul to the kingpin of this entire thing right now, Alex. I'm imagining a faux-Phillip Sheppard scenario where I tell Alex he owns my vote, but he doesn't really. I have no clue if he'd bite but it's worth trying because what the fuck else do I have left.

On the topic of Alex, I could also try to shift his attention into targeting someone like Mitch or Benj? I can embellish a little bit and tell Alex that Mitch is spreading a rumor that he has the Dirt People Idol or something along those lines.

Next on the (tentative) agenda is to talk with Jules and try to see where I stand with her. For some reason I feel the most burned by her from last tribal?? I don't trust her at all but as long as she thinks that door is still open I'll hear what she has to say. Maybe I can guilt her into giving me more info as well?

And the last thing I can think of is try making a better connection with Mo and Jones, and hopefully start some sort of game relationship with those two. I don't really see myself getting far with this one considering these two have been hit or miss in the conversations I've had with them, but there isn't anything worth not trying at this point.

Back to a less gamebotty point of view, I've honestly been oscillating between being angry and being upset about how last tribal broke down, mainly because I feel like Ali, Julia, and Mitch could've waited a lot longer to do something like this if they were worried about me and Ian (which I still believe they had very little reason to be worried right now in the first place). But I also feel like I had 9 doors slam in my face and the only person I can still be real with is Tom. I'm back at square one and I'm not happy about it, but I didn't come back to this godforsaken ORG to go down easy so I've gotta keep moving for as long as I can.

(Also I need to be willing to let go of Tom. I'm not gonna go out of my way to burn him, but I'm also beyond the point of wanting to stick my neck out too far for him. My longevity is the only priority right now.)

okay so... this vote is operation get Caeleb out of here. I really wanted to work with Caeleb, and I think he could have been a really useful number, but like... him telling Jones about the plan to vote Alex really, really rubbed me the wrong way. Like I do not trust him at all after that, I really do not know where we are at now.

So here is the goal. I'm about to call Jason and hopefully get him back on side. Then hopefully between Jules and I, we can convince Space Jam to vote Caeleb (I'm still confused how close he is to Mo/Jones/Alex, could be a good test). With Caeleb, a potential number for them, out of the way, next round its time for a big move, its time for one of Jones/Alex/Mo to go.

The numbers for that move would be (hopefully) Me, Jules, Julia, Tom, Jason, Mitch (6/10) + Benj hopefully, or at worst I'll just keep him in the loop. I really think Caeleb going could be so so good, it really opens up numbers and weakens Jones/Mo/Alex - it also narrows down where the idol is, something that we have to stay conscious of.

At the moment, my closest allies are definitely Jules and Benj. Jules is just.... the best, so woke, so on the ball, I am LOVING playing this season with them. Benj is such a king, my earliest like 'proper' ally even though Julia approached me after like 0.5 seconds in the game ha. I love Benj, and at the moment he also is quite out of the loop, he could also be a workable FTC option. I'm really stuck with Jules and FTC - you would be crazy to take Jules, as articulate and smart as they are, to FTC, but I really don't think I could face writing Jules' name down, I would feel AWFUL.

Also thoughts on Tom? He is too good for this world, he was so sweet about Ian/Jason going and like I really relate to the emotions he feels in games, on a personal level he is the best.

I feel like my plan going forwards is vote off Caeleb, then Alex, then Jones/Mo, and then figure it out from there. I really think if I play it right, I can slowly and calmly continue to have real swing over this game, I'm mc'loving it.

Also, because I keep doing this and its a fun pattern at this point, this is the order in which I would vote for people at FTC, if I go 11th at the moment:

Jules > Jason > Alex > Julia > Mitch > Jones > Tom > Benj > Caeleb > Mo

okay i just called Jason, such a king! i feel like i was VERY awkward, and I like I didn't articulate myself very well, but... he gets that we are going to need to potentially pull some shenanigans. I really want Caeleb then Alex, but if we need to just do Alex first, I can deal with that.

I think ideal situation is Tom wins immunity, Space Jam wants to vote Caeleb - we all go along with it, and then Alex goes next round, but we will see eek!

Oh wow hi it’s me, Mo.

So here’s the rundown on what’s happened the past couple rounds for my dumbass. First let’s start off with getting to merge, it’s a talent of mine, don’t look at my Italy placement. We’re out of that dumb fucking cave so no more waiting which is great. Another cool thing is I’m actually allies with Julia now which is weird because I’m going to be honest I was terrified of her going into this game. We had a past game experience that made me fearful. But now I’m sitting comfy in a majority alliance with Alex, Ali, Jones, Jules & Julia. By the way this is a first time thing for me, being in a majority alliance during merge. So this at least guarantees me final 7 or 6. It took me four tries to spell guarantees, who’s idea was it to put the u in front of the a it’s fucking stupid. But like here’s the thing, my gameplay is somewhat underwhelming. Basically my game relies on jury management and likability. Because I can’t strategize for shit, I just kinda smile and waddle forward when a door opens. I thought at this part of the game I would be close allies with Tom again but that didn’t happen. Apparently JJ told Tom about an alliance made in old Durmitor with Alex, Jules, Jones & Evan??? Made to like simmer JJ down. So now Tom doesn’t want to work with any of them (Which mind you three of them are my close allies) so he confronted Alex about it and I think he was like butthurt about not being included??? But like bitch I wasn’t included either but I’m not sulking about it. It wasn’t even a serious alliance. Also back to my alliances, sorry I know this is mixed up. MESSY, WHO BROUGHT NAPKINS IM GETTING MESSY. But I was also in an alliance with Alex, Jones & Caeleb after the swap. Called the Durmitor Dominators which is still a thing. But Caeleb wasn’t added to the Space Jam alliance with the group of 6 so I’m like??? What’s going on there??? I should probably talk about it with Alex because I am confusion. Also now there’s this new twist since we got out of the Dua Lipa cave, now we have to adjust to the sunlight with this exposure twist which basically means whoever gets eliminated gets to expose three people and whoever is exposed still by the tribal has to write who they’re voting for in chat. So I love that. But that’s about it for me thank you for taking the time to read this.

I DO NOT WANT TO BE VOTING JASON AT ALL THE FUCK I WANT TO GET ALEX THE FUCK OUT OF HERE BUT NO CAELEB APPARENTLY WANTS TO VOTE JASON I HATE THIS THEY REALLY ARE TRYING TO GET MY HOMIE JASON OUT!!! WAS I CONSPIRING AGAINST HIM AND IAN ALL WEEK? MAYBE SO! BUT I DON'T WANT HIM OUT YET!!! I DON'T!! WE ARE TRYING TO BLINDSIDE ALEX BUT THIS AIN'T WORKING UGHGHGHGHG *STOMPS ON THE GROUND* UGHGHGHGH I HATE THIS GOODBYE

Sooo besides the fact that it took me 5 minutes to find the confessional tab because I havent been doing these im here to update!!! Ian was just voted out and although i'm fine with it for now, I was NOT expecting a split vote. That makes me feel a little bit nervous going further into the game. I did think it was beneficial to split up the Jason/Ian duo but i was expecting Jason to go; not Ian. Anywho im almost positive im in the same predicament this vote. I've mended my relationship with Jason and im working very well with Tom to flip the script on Alex (who I believe to be running the game). Typically I would wait a few more rounds to get Alex out, but if everyone is playing for him to win, I might miss my opportunity like I did in my last season. I'm not blind! I'll do whatever it takes to go far and put myself in people's endgames. RN swapped Durmitor has the power. I dont necessarily like that because although im not on bad terms with them, I'm definitely on the bottom of that totem pole.

Tom sent seven confessionals in a row to be put at different places throughout this and last episode??? I guess??? But no thank you, so enjoy the thoughts in the order he apparently had them. ~Drew

*1 hour before tribal*

WHY IS ALEX SO CRACKED HONESTLY alex has said ian, caeleb and jason to 3 people i dont understand i am most likely getting played here but i dont want any of them to go, i see very high potential when working with all three of them so i think im going to try to make a big move and take out alex. I'm immune this round but next round im not so its a bit risky. I think Ali and Jules would be on board if there was the numbers there so if me ian jason julia ali and caeleb all voted together that would be majority and alex would be the first blindside of the game....

Tom

*10 hours before tribal council*

Everyone is pretty much dead silence i feel like everyone has an idea of who they would like to target but no one is really wanting to be the first person to throw a name out there so like its gonna get so fucking messy whilst im asleep and imma wake up to one big mess i already know it

Tom

*1-2 hours before tribal*

Okay so I've just woken up and i just spoke to alex and he seems like he just wants to do anything to get his ass safe this round which is sketch af, he is saying the vote is caeleb to me so thats cool and all but i asked caeleb what he was hearing just to get both sides and caeleb said alex said jason..... so like wtf is alex trying to do.....

TOM

ABORT MISSION ABORT MISSION sinking ship is near i cba voting for alex now that he has told jones, he did the same thing as evan and i am just ready for his ass to go out the door ugh im so annoyed!

Tom

OKAY I CANNOT DEAL WHO THE FUCK IS THIS CAELEB KID HONESTLY WHY ARE YOU SUCH A FUCKING IDIOT WHY DID YOU GO AND TELL JONES LITERALLY ALL OF WHAT I SAID....ITS A KNOWN FACT THAT THEY'RE A DUO OPEN YOUR STUPID EYES IDIOT!!!! THANKS SO MUCH NOW IMMA GET FUCKED OVER AND GET TARGETED BY ALEX AND HIS MINIONS NEXT ROUND. THIS IS WHAT I GET FOR TRYING TO SAVE SOMEONE I WANT TO WORK WITH IN THIS GAME....

Tom

*Tribal just happened*

Oh okay uhm well thats just fucking sad. I would like to say i never cry when a close ally is eliminated but i am a mess, i am crying right now at work and my driver is like "uhm are you okay..." yeah man im okay just crying over an ally that essentially died because i cant even speak to him anymore rip :( I miss ian so much i am so fucking furious that i am blindsided again at merge tho.... also really 9 people were in on that blindside split vote.....WOW! I am so surprised that ali and jules didnt tell me about the plan tbh they can say all they want about how they thought i knew but like if you thought i knew you should've just spoken to me about the vote.... like WHY THE FUCK WOULD YOU SPLIT UP JIAN when JONEX is still in the game they're much more dangerous and so much harder to get out every round we get closer.

Tom

waa waaa waaa call the wambulance! My plan is working so far i think tbh, mitch has been very responsive about this round and i am fairly certain that he has realised how fucked of a position he is in this game without me and jason here so he made an alliance chat which is good because that means he will work with us even just for this round. I think a lot of people now jian is out, have realised the next big big duo in this game is jalex so hopefully the movement on them occurs!

Tom

*hour after tribal*

Okay so this is shit me and jason are in minority and will most likely get votes split against us.... time to do something about it, in the past merges ive been too ive been in the bottom, and i was taken out this time it wont be happening as much as alex would like it too i will not let it happen! This cast seems to have fairly emotional sympathetic people in this game so imma express how sad i was at the tribal say i was balling my eyes out when ian left and how i feel so down and out and that i am very lost and sad in this game. Because this will make people feel bad for not including me in the plans and also it will create conversation for them to work with me to build my spirits up again and make me happy.

Just thinking about this exposure twist. Kinda cool actually. I'm surprised to say it but I think this might be the type of thing that I like to see??? Who am I. Kinda wish the reward challenge was more of a flash game over a typing game, only because I wanna know how hard the winner worked to get that score. Like for typing you kinda either are already good at it prior or you're shit at it, so I can't tell if Alex put in a bunch of time and effort to win. If it was some weird flash game that had a steep learning curve then I would know better and have a better grip on the game Alex is playing. Regardless, kinda excited about Benj having the curse because I think(?) that we can use that to actually do something crazy? Like I'm thinking a 5 vote blindside tie type situation where Benj throws out a red herring type of vote. We'll see, but I think I need to keep a low profile so who knows if that'll come to fruition.

okay mitch! has! been! elevated! to! king! status!

me and mitch have had a good conversation which I'm super SUPER happy about, he is someone who is in a similar spot to me, so I am SOOO happy we are talking yay. He agrees Alex needs to go soon, like... people are on the same page, maybe its time for it to hap' hap' happen.

since alex won reward, he'll of course save himself, which is fine. it means julia and benj are exposed, and while they're both close allies of mine, they are probably the two who would be in the toughest spot to vote alex, julia since she is like out of nowhere close to him, and benj since he is close to jones.

the plan could be to get alex and co to agree to another split vote or something, which separates numbers that could allow us to strike versus Alex. Maybe if we did like... Alex/Jones/Mo/Caleb on someone, Benj/Julia on another and then Me/Jason/Tom/Jules/Mitch on someone, making a 5-4-2 vote. oh god these merge vote counts have been so so cracked.

we will see. i think my placement this season is going to be like... 8th or something? I am scared of flipping for two votes in a row, BUT I feel like the good news is if I was getting voted out, either Tom or Benj would now hear about it, so I should be able to still play my idol. We will see ahh, but its very scary!

as always with my confessionals:

Bootlist: Alex > Caeleb > Jones > Jason > Mo > Mitch > Julia > Jules > Me/Tom/Benj F3

here is the problem though, I can't vote Jules out. I am such a Jules stan, voting them out would snap my heart it half, I really don't think I could do it. I think I would need others to do it, I'd probably want to be blindsided by it and kept in the dark.

and then the order I would vote people in an FTC:

Jules > Alex > Jason > Mitch > Benj > Julia > Tom > Jones > Caeleb > Mo

Ok so now I’m getting added to a third alliance chat which is supposedly a final 3 alliance. But like here’s the thing, I’d be sitting next to Jones & Alex. I have a snowballs chance in hell of winning against either of them. Everyone loves Jones and Alex has been kinda running this game so far. I’m just kinda his goat. Don’t get me wrong I wanna start making some moves but it’s too early, right now I want to stay unthreatening and low key. I might just have to ride this coat tail to the end because if we have bitter jurors they’ll end up looking at Alex.

So Alex says he didnt read the challenge post... yet came 2nd?

I dont buy it, I fully believe if I ask Benj and others what Alex asked to give him, he will say negatives. He is such a fraud.

also this split vote will be his undoing... his ass is about to be grass... mwahahahahha

-28... negative. 28. negative. twenty. eight. what the FUCK did i do to these people??

I don't even know where to go from here.

...but I mean I kinda do.

I can use this to further push the narrative that I've got no one and hence nowhere near the biggest threat/I'm the easiest target there is and HOPEFULLY people take their eyes off of me.

Aside from that what I WANT to do is vote Alex out (big change from my last confessional, I know). I think I have Tom and Jules on board if I were to pitch it to them, same with Mitch and Ali. I MIGHT have Caeleb but he ran it back to Jones last round so the precedent's already set. So from there to have a five vote majority was I was considering to split the other 6 votes. Julia and Benj are getting their votes exposed so they probably want to vote majority, which I'm anticipating to be someone like myself, Tom, or Caeleb. Ideally, the vote splits one of two ways— NEVERMIND

!! BREAKING !!

Tom says via Ali that Alex thinks that the 9 that split their vote on me and Ian are gonna split their vote again on me and Tom, but Ali isn't on board with that (if he's being honest), and I'd have to assume the same goes for Mitch since there's now a chat with myself him and Tom. So the plan from there (which ties into what I was planning anyway) is to get Jules on board (we called the day after tribal, she SOUNDS like she'd be down), and let the rest of them split their vote.

So that means...

FUCK Alex

FUCK Caeleb

FUCK Julia

FUCK the rest of em bc who??

[but not really it's a game I don't mean it]

But as far as tribal plans right now go... ideally it turns out

5-4-2

5: Me/Tom/Mitch/Ali/Jules for Alex

4-2: Some combination of Alex/Mo/Caeleb/Jones/Julia/Benj for me/Tom

I probably get the 4 again, Tom gets 2... or other way around??? I get the 2 if Mitch/Ali/Jules are meant to vote for me?

But anyways don't be shocked if this is all for nothing and this is my last confessional x

god... negative 28...

i am so frustrated with julia. okay so tom told me apparently on call she said she has a F3 with Alex/Jones, specifically a F2 with Alex. Now... I fully feel like Tom made this up, BUT I asked Julia about the vote and she says she wants to ride out the Space Jam alliance...

is she nuts. is she NUTS kjlasdfas. Literally I feel like WAY too much of this tribe is drinking the Alex Kool-Aid and I can't describe how frustrating it is lowkey. Like I sided with Alex relying on like... Julia's wokeness that we could then detach ourselves, Alex is now FULLY running this tribe and it terrifies me.

It solidifies to me that Alex needs to go this round. Like....this round. He is running this tribe, he has grips on Jones/Mo/Caeleb/Julia, and potentially Benj through Jones. That is SUCH a large amount of this tribe, so I need to stick my neck out. I'm fully embracing that I'm not making FTC at this rate, so it's just time to shake stuff up.

Here is the plan. I am going to play into the split vote plan, we can get Alex and his minions as they shall henceforth be called to split their votes between Jason and Tom, and then maybe Me/Tom/Jules/Mitch/Jason vote out Alex or any of his minions, I don't care which.

At this rate, I'm going to be going into F10 in a potential 5-5 situation, but honestly... Jones/Mo say about a word and a half of game between them each round so they are not workable allies, Julia who flips at literally the drop of a hat is suddenly misted by Alex and Co., Caeleb is just infuriating for telling Jones about the Alex vote, shows he can't be trusted. That leaves only Benj my king, the only woke one, though I am afraid of his connection to Jones.

I just WISH this TRIBE would use their BRAINS. Specifically Julia at the minute.

I’m so TIRED I’ve been so quiet maybe that’s why people are thinking about targeting me :)

Ok ok lemme back up a lil,, this is all according to Alex,, which,,,,,,, idk about YALL but he’s giving off a bit of a paranoid energy right now,, and I’m fully aware of the fact that he has the best chance at winning this game out of anyone here, sooooo maybe let him get eaten by the wolves soon? Not necessarily soon but like,, ya soon. Don’t wanna get him to the end skkdkdkdks. I also think separating myself from Alex might take a target off of MY back, I’ve been trying to separate myself like on my own terms but I think I need to start like,,, setting the stage kind of thing. Idk all I know is that I have a better chance sitting with anyone BUT him,, So maybe it wouldn’t be a bad thing to push Alex into the fire a little bit.

I have yet to hear a name, though I’d like to get Tom out personally? He can slide utr really easily,, plus we can (or at least I can) confirm he doesn’t have an idol, the only question is does Jason have an idol and is willing to play it on the only person he voted with? Who KNOWS!! We just have to make them feel comfy (assuming we have the majority vote that is KSKSKS)

But ya stay tuned laid ease

okay so alex is really trying to play me and its very transparent. now, this could just be tom playing which if so, good for him, his mind and his MIST, but here is the deal.

tom tells me him and alex had a conversation about pairs, where Tom threw out Alex/Jones as a pair, and Alex threw out Julia and I. Then in Alex's retelling of that same conversation, side note its funny that I heard the same conversation from both sides in the space of about 10 minutes, Alex conveniently leaves out that he threw out me and Julia as a pair, and he is SO defensive about him and Jones as a pair.

Jones was on my ass immediately when Caeleb told her Alex could be the vote, and Alex also knew super fast. You are really going to try and convince me that you aren't even close when you have spent 23 days on a tribe together, and from the sounds of things, voted together every single time! im not buying it.

for this vote, i want either alex or an alex minion out, i think mo would be the most do-able. jones is close to caeleb, who we will need as a number, so if alex's idol paranoia is too big, maybe we need to remove mo from the equation? we will see.

mo is my org son, and i love him on calls and such, but I am confused by the game he is playing. I'm potentially super underestimating him, which is a definite possibility, but at the moment.... its like... do something charlie. is he just going to hide behind Jones and Alex, because that's not smart.

i would like to see Alex go this vote, but i think he is already too paranoid (i think tom stoked his paranoia WAY too much). I think Mo could end up being the back up vote, which is probably actually okay, because Alex is a definite shield moving forwards, particularly if still paired with Jones.

Updated Jury Vote Rankings:

Jules > Alex > Jason > Tom > Mitch > Benj > Julia > Jones > Caeleb > Mo

okay I'm like... getting frustrated with Alex. he literally does not know how to be subtle about anything lowkey, like this vote split is literally his 4 OG Durmitors voting 'correctly', leaving all his unsure numbers Me/Jules/Julia/Benj on Jason... like mc'what...

i really want him gone, EVERYONE is drinking the Alex Kool-Aid. Maybe I'm not seeing it, but Jones and Mo particularly are playing SO passively, I fully want to scream.

I need to convince Caeleb to make a move. It's really time to just send Alex, or literally any of his minions out of here. I want to include Julia so badly, but she is so blindly misted by him out of nowhere, I hate it UGH.

I think I want Alex and Mo out as the next two votes, Alex runs the show and Mo is just too passive of a player to be a workable ally. Jones is much more of a threat, but Benj likes her and I want to respect.

I just can't deal with Alex and Co. playing so passively for another round, I'll scream KLASDFA.

Alex aka Gru (because of his minions) unfortunately goes byebye tonight. It took a bit of last minute persuading of Caeleb, but we have GOT THIS ahh.

It looks like its going to be either 6 votes or 5 if Tom self-votes on Alex (Me, Caeleb, Jules, Tom, Jason & Mitch), 3 on Tom (Jones, Mo & Alex) and 2 on Jason (Julia and Benj).

This could definitely backfire, but I don't think I'll go home (famous last words), and if Tom/Jason gets idoled out, next round there is still wiggle room because I still have my KING Benj on the other side. Jones/Mo/Julia are going to be coming for my neck, but I'd rather face the minions than Gru himself NNN,

i might live to regret this if Caeleb turns on me, but I take back everything negative I've EVER said about Caeleb. He is an icon, and so so fun to talk to. I feel like he really trusts me now, so I can't turn on him unless I have to.

New goal final five is Me/Jules/Benj/Tom/Caeleb... and I think its do-able. We get Alex out this vote, then Julia/Mo/Jones/Jason as the next four, followed by Mitch... I'm not sure how exactly, but we will figure it out AHH.