#okay fuck tom cruise but please hear me out

[gay-poet-gabriel]

steve <3

more under cut:

[worldofheroes]

Failed Prank

tom cruise x girlfriend!reader

summary: you and tom spend the day at the beach, and he tries to prank you, only to fail.

warnings: alcohol, language, fluff

wc: 719

a/n: a request by @rveyjules ! I did write some smut for this but decided since I’ve only been writing filth I needed something fluffy 😅 I’d be more than happy to share the “deleted scene��� in the future!

“How about right… here?” you ask Tom as he trails behind you on the beach.

“Whatever you like, sweetheart,” he gives you a smile.

You smile back at him, setting your things down and starting to set up.

“I’m glad we were able to relax for a few days,” you say, settling into your chair. Tom sits in the chair beside you.

“I agree, I’ve missed you,” Tom says, reaching for your hand and giving it a kiss.

You smile at him, taking the sunglasses - a pair of Tom's aviators - from your head and putting them on.

“Time to get back to this book,” you say, pulling out your latest read from your tote.

“Do you want anything to drink?” Tom asks.

“Yes, please!”

“Strawberry daiquiri?”

“Always,” you confirm.

“Okay, I’ll be back soon,” Tom says, standing up and kissing the top of your head.

You go back to your book, not phased by anything happening around you.

As Tom walks to the bar, he decides he’s going to prank you. He finds a spot at the bar where he can see you, and orders the drinks.

He pulls out his phone to give you a quick text.

Tom carefully watches you after he hits send.

You hear your phone go off. You move your sunglasses to the top of your head as you fumble for your phone. You see it’s a text from Tom.

There’s a girl flirting with me at the bar.

You roll your eyes and put your phone away. You bring your sunglasses back down and continue reading, not bothered by the text.

Tom furrows his brow, unsure why you went back to reading and didn’t start looking for him. He decides he won’t say anything when he gets back, unless you say something first.

The bartender hands him the drinks and he heads back to you.

“One strawberry daiquiri,” Tom says, handing you the glass.

“Oh, thank you, I’m so excited for this,” you tell him, putting your book down and taking the glass.

You take a sip through the straw.

“Oh, it’s perfect,” you breathe.

Tom chuckles. “Good to hear.”

You spend a few hours on the beach, enjoying your time with Tom. Later in the afternoon, the two of you pack up and head back to the condo.

“I need something to eat,” you say out loud, to no one in particular. You make a bee-line to the fridge.

“You’re just going to leave me with everything?” Tom calls out after you.

“Yeah, I think so!” you reply from the kitchen.

You pull out the leftover cake you had saved from the previous day, taking a seat at the kitchen island.

“Well, that’s a good snack,” Tom jokes.

“Hey, watch it,” you say, taking a bite.

“Did you see my text when we were at the beach?” Tom asks.

“Hmm? Oh, yeah, I did,” you comment, still focused on your piece of cake.

“Why didn’t you come find me?”

“What?” You furrow your brow. “I didn’t think you needed rescuing.”

“What?” Tom replies.

You shrug. “Girls flirting with you isn’t exactly new, Tom. You’re Tom fucking Cruise, you’re hot and handsome and of course girls would flirt with you.”

“But what if I did something bad, like flirting back?”

You roll your eyes and lean across the counter to get closer to Tom. “Well, I know you wouldn’t do that, Cruise.”

“Yeah? How come?”

“I didn’t think you were this dumb,” you laugh. “Because I trust you, Tom. I know you only have eyes for me.”

“Pretty confident there, wouldn’t you say?”

“Are you trying to get a reaction out of me?”

Tom gives you a mischievous smile. “I don’t know, what do you think?”

“Fuck off,” you say, rolling your eyes again. You lean in and give him a kiss.

“That wasn’t very nice to say,” Tom mumbles against your lips.

“Shut up and kiss me,” you say, moving in for another kiss. Tom moves away. “What?”

“Come here,” he says, walking around the island.

You stand up and he pulls you into him. You look up at him.

“You’re absolutely right,” he whispers, giving you a gentle kiss.

“I mean, yes, but about what?”

“That I only have eyes for you.”

“You’re so stupid,” you laugh, giving him another kiss.

[blood-mocha-latte]

Okay hear me out. A Valentine's Day ficlet wherein everyone in H Company is out on fancy dates except ace!Chuckler, who is S T O K E D to have the apartment to himself. He's gonna Tom Cruise underwear dance yo.

bestie you absolute GENIUS by god. ace!chuckler my beloved!! loosier sort of Shoved themselves into this, which i hope is okay!

i love this too much. so much. all the much. i hope you enjoy <3

~

“Please don’t tell me those are what I think they are.” 

Chuckler smiled, smug, and adjusted the sunglasses across the bridge of his nose. “I think I look classy.” He said, and Lucky looked at him with something that matched vague horror.

“They’re bigger than the continental US.” He said, sounding somewhat impressed. “And pink.”

“And stylish.” Runner jumped in easily, rounding their kitchen island with a cup of coffee and sitting across from Leckie. “You could be on the cover of Vogue.”

Lew grinned, and tilted his face up so the sunglasses wouldn’t fall off. “Because of my stunning good looks?”

He’d gotten the glasses for half off at the gas station that sat kitty-corner from their apartment, and it was, in short, the best three quarters and a dime he ever spent. 

“I think I’m gonna wear them everywhere.” He said, and took them off only to admire them, the heart-shape of their frames, the red tint of the shades. “Paint ‘em green, go out for a night in the town.”

“Get horribly lost again.” Runner agreed, and Chuckler made a face at him.

“Okay, well, that wasn’t on me.” He said loftily, crossing his arms and setting the glasses down on the table. “Someone took the charger so my phone was dead, so I couldn’t Google-walk home—”

“—that was extenuating-fucking-circumstances, I was supposed to get a call from a publisher—” Leckie is jumping in with a protest before Lew can even finishing talking, holding up his hands defensively, and Runner started talking over him after that, a large jumble of shouting that ceased only when Leckie’s door cracked open.

Lucky nearly fell out of his chair when Hoosier shuffled out of his room, blanket wrapped around his shoulders, hair sticking up in every direction. “Coffee.” He said, and Hoosier grunted, a nonverbal confirmation that sounded only slightly murderous.

“I hate you.” He said, shuffling the short distance between their bedroom and the dining room table and dropping into Leckie’s now unoccupied seat. Leckie in question was pouring a second mug of coffee, still steaming, and was quick to move and set it in front of Bill, pressing a kiss to his temple that Hoosier was too slow to bat away.

“I love you, and I’ll get you whatever you want tonight.” He promised, already turning back into the kitchen to find the creamer. Hoosier curved his hands around the mug, bringing his face down to inhale the steam.

“I want a new boyfriend.” He muttered to it, and Runner snorted.

“Bad night?” He asked, and Chuckler raised his eyebrows, pushing his glasses closer to Hoosier when the other just gave him a blank look.

“I was having trouble with my novel.” Leckie said absently, clattering around at the counter as he did something that Lew couldn’t see. “And was trying to force myself to write, which—”

“Which means that I got one and a half hours of sleep last night, and also am going to get a gun.” Hoosier said over him, face still against his mug. “To kill you, Bob, if that wasn’t clear.”

“It’s very clear. And very understandable.” Leckie said, turning back around with one of the semi-stale croissants they’d gotten at the same gas station that Chuckler had acquired his glasses at. “Have I told you how gorgeous you are?”

“I’m breaking up with you.” Hoosier said. “We’re done. Get out of my house.” Leckie hummed, setting the croissant in front of him and crossing an arm over the front of his chest, dropping his face down to his hair before kissing his forehead. 

“I’ve got an awesome day planned.” He said, and Hoosier groaned, holding up a hand to fend him off. “You’re gonna love it—”

“I’m gonna be too tired to enjoy it—”

“Well,” Chuckler interrupted, pushing his sunglasses back onto his face when Hoosier showed no interest in them. “I mean. I slept great.”

Hoosier just blinked at him. “Would you like company tonight?”

“Baby—” Leckie started, holding his hands out, but Lew was already shaking his head, vehement. 

“No way in hell!” He said cheerfully, pushing his glasses further up on his nose. “Today for me is about me. Today for you is about you and Lucky, it’s not my fault he’s a terrible partner.”

Hoosier dropped his forehead to the table with a groan, and Leckie shot Chuckler a vaguely threatening look. Lew just shrugged, still grinning, and Runner snorted.

“I mean. I’m gonna have a great day too.” He offered, and Chuckler held his hand up in a high five.

“Hell yeah!” He said, enthused. “But you can’t stay here. I have dibs.”

Leckie made some sort of frustrated sound, still clattering around in something that seemed to be in an effort to reap forgiveness. “When can we come back?” He asked, complaining, and Hoosier snorted.

“Why do you care?” He muttered to the table. “You’re never getting laid again.”

Chuckler just shrugged. “Sleep over at Hoosier’s place.” He offered to Lucky, and Hoosier groaned over him in protest. 

“He’s sleeping in the fucking street before he’s getting into my bed again.” He said, and Leckie sighed.

So. Very par for the course.

“I’ll give you seven dollars if we can come back by nine.” Lucky offered, and Lew grinned, delighted.

“Nope! This is the first time I get to be by myself in nine months, by darling friends, and I don’t want to see any of your faces for the next twenty-four hours. You have thirty minutes to get out of here.” 

He finished off his own coffee, and Hoosier pushed his face off of the table to squint at him, under eyes bruised purple. Leckie moved around him again, attempting to kiss his cheek, and Hoosier steered him away with an open palm to the face.

“I like your glasses.” He told Chuckler.

“Thanks.” Lew said, cheerful. “I like your croissant.”

“Thanks. You can have it, if you want. You can have the man who made it, too.”

“Babe—” 

Chuckler snorted, wrinkling his nose. “Thanks, but I’m okay.”

--

His plan for the night, as written out:

Wrap all of Leckie’s shoes in cellophane.

Last month, Lew had woken up at four in the morning with his singularly obtained Buffy the Vampire Slayer comic book shrink wrapped, and Leckie sitting at their kitchen table, sipping at coffee, calmly writing out what seemed to be a letter.

Finally, he had time to seek his revenge.

(He had also conveniently forgotten that the reason Leckie’d wrapped his comic book at all was because Chuckler had replaced all of Hoosier’s keys with plastic baby rings.)

Do his laundry. In peace. 

Last time, Runner had gotten cheetos in the dryer. Lew wasn’t even sure how he managed that, but never again. Never again.

Text Hoosier to make sure he hasn’t actually killed Lucky.

“Hi.”

“Hey! Are you okay?”

“Uh, yeah. It’s fine. It’s all fine. I’m still mad, though, so. Uh.”

“Lucky plan something good?”

“Ugh. Yeah. It’s really sweet, the motherfucker. I’m never gonna forgive him for this.”

“He took you to the Observatory, didn’t he?”

“Yep. The bastard. How’s it going for you?”

“I mean. If it makes you feel better, he has a nice present at home, now.”

“Hm. Make him suffer for me.”

“Okay! But don’t make him too upset. This is, like, a big night for him.”

“...”

“Hello?”

“Chuckler. You have to tell me if he’s going to propose. Legally. It’s — you can get arrested if you don’t.”

“Hm. I don’t think I can. But he’s not gonna propose—”

“I — I mean, we’ve talked about this, and I’d say yes, but if he proposes on fucking Valentines day—”

“He’s not gonna propose! I promise. Scouts honor! Roommates honor!”

“That is the most cliche shit I’ve ever heard—” 

“All I did was tell you to be nice to him! That doesn’t mean he’s going to ask you to marry him—” 

“Oh, holy fuck, I knew that he was being weirdly nice—”

Make a cake.

Although whatever drama Hoosier and Leckie were going through was interesting enough, he also had a recipe that he wanted to try and last time he’d tried to bake anything of any sort, Hoosier had poured jalapeno sauce into it. 

Which, come to think of it, may have been because Chuckler popped all of the keys out of Leckie’s laptop.

Listen to Simon and Garfunkel.

Runner hated Simon and Garfunkel, and because Chuckler was to be a good person, he didn’t blast it through the house when he was home.

But he wasn’t home, was he!

Lew loved Valentine's Day.

Call Hoosier one more time. Just to be extra certain Leckie isn’t dead.

“Oh, good, you picked up! Please tell me you haven’t got engaged—”

“What? Oh, no. Bob has been, uh. Well. Bob’s been arrested, so—”

“Bob’s been what—” 

“But it’s not my fault, I feel I should make that incredibly clear—”

“Uh-huh. Okay, well, I’m not coming and getting you. Call Runner.”

“No, no—”

“It’s my day, Hoosier! You know this! It’s my day, I’m not dragging my ass down to the station—”

“My boyfriend’s in jail, Lew, I think that’s extenuating circumstances—”

“Ope, the Sound of Silence just came on, so I’m gonna obey its wise title and hang up. Call Runner!”

“I — uh. Fine. It’s your day.”

“It really is! Good luck. Don’t say anything without a lawyer.”

Yeah. Lew loved Valentine’s Day.

[svechnikovvv]

can’t take my eyes off you (part 6)

gif by: @his-name-is-ed

pairing: steve harrington x fem!reader

warnings: the usual

word count: 4,960

summary: steve fake dates y/n for a week for a family reunion, but little does y/n know, he's had the biggest crush on her for a while.

a/n: AH, YOU GUYS, WE'RE NEARING THE END

friday. it was FINALLY friday. you haven't left the room since wednesday and you obviously knew that today you had to get off your ass and go be productive again. you were really feeling up for a movie, so later you'd ask steve if you and him can go see top gun. he knows he can't turn down tom cruise.

speaking of steve, he was still asleep next to you.

"he's like a fucking owl," you get up and head to take a shower. you desperately needed one. after all was said and done, you head downstairs and maragaret's standing at the stove, cooking her infamous pancakes.

"y/n. oh my god. i started to think you were becoming a hermit," you laugh at diane's comment and sit down at your favorite bar stool and rest your chin on your palm.

"just needed to take an off day 's all"

"take as many off days as you need, dear. nobody's judging"

"duly noted"

"okay, food's done" your stomach lets out a growl and you make both you and steve a plate. about ten minutes into your eating, steve plops down beside you. he was still wearing his pajamas and you chuckled. he was rubbing his eyes, more-than-likely ridding them of sleep. he then lets out a big yawn and you pass him the syrup.

"you sleep good steve?" diane asks and steve grunts

"no. y/n shoved me off the bed halfway through the night" both margaret and diane look at you. you point your syrup-covered butterknife at steve.

"i told you if i woke up with your damn knee in my back, i'd shove you off the bed"

"i didn't think you were being serious"

"i value my sleep, harrington. and just because you're my boyfriend, it doesn't mean you get freebies" he rolls his eyes and you go back to cutting up your pancakes.

"see what i have to deal with everyday" he says to his mom

"oh please. you wouldn't last a day without me" diane watches the two of you argue playfully with a smile on her face. she loved what the two of you had.

"alright children, fnish your food" she interjects, and you two listen to her, finishing up your breakfast. you wash your plate and step into the hallway.

"y/n!" you snap your head in the direction of the voice and see wendy running over to you.

"wendy! there's my favorite girl" you squat down and open your arms. she runs into them and you stand up holding her. you spin her around and she starts laughing. you put her back on the ground and she brushes her stray hairs out her face, looking up at you.

"where were you yesterday? me and nicole wanted to play with you" you frowned at her

"i wasn't feeling so hot yesterday so i stayed in my room" she nods

"was stevie your doctor"

"yes, i was," you hear steve speak up from behind you. "and i took good care of her too"

"good. princess y/n needs royal treatment" you laugh at her statement and steve nods.

"yes she does," he places an arm around your waist and the three of you head out to the terrace, you and steve sitting on the porch swing.

"ooh! y/n! can i show you my cartwheel?" wendy asks, running to stand in the grass. you nod. she does a cartwheel for you and steve and you gotta admit, it was a pretty damn good cartwheel. you both clap for her and she does a curtsey.

"where'd you learn to do that?" steve asks her

"my friends from school" he nods and she sits in the swing between both you and steve.

"can we go get more ice cream today?" steve chuckles and looks at you, then looking back down at wendy.

"wendy, sweetheart, it's only 11 in the morning" she shrugs

"it's never too early for ice cream” you and steve laugh

“ask your mom later if you can and if she says yes, then we’ll go”she nods and you and steve continue to gently swing back and forth.

“how did you and stevie meet?” she asks, breaking the silence. you look at steve, having a silent conversation with your eyes. he finally caves and rolls his eyes. he begins to tell her the same story you told his mom, but changes it up a bit.

“well, one day y/n came into scoops ahoy. because i used to work at an ice cream place. but she came in and asked for a waffle cone with two scoops of strawberry ice cream. i remember thinking that she was the prettiest girl that had came in that day," steve briefly looks over at you and gives you a smile. he then goes back to telling wendy the story.

"i told her she looked more like a cookies n' cream type of girl. she laughed and paid for her ice cream then left. she kept coming in every day and eventually, i asked her on a date" wendy gasps and covers her mouth, looking up at you. you smiled and nodded at her.

"where did stevie take you for the date?" you panick because you didn't know what to say. you were surprised you even made up the ice cream story as quick as you did a few days ago. yet you couldn't come up with a simple first date spot.

"i took her to the fair since it was in town" you internally sigh and wendy's eyes are twinkling as if you and steve's fake first date was straight out of a disney princess movie.

"did you guys get cotton candy?"

"lots of it"

"and funnel cake?"

"the best part" wendy then turned to you

"did he share his funnel cake with you?"

"yes. he was a gentleman" she nods and faces steve again

"when did you have your first kiss?" god, you and steve were going to need an oscar for how good you two have been putting up this performance.

"we had it at his house" her face scrunched up at your quick reply

"that's not romantic" you hold up a finger

"every first kiss has a story, silly" she gets excited again. she loves her stories.

"okay, so stevie has a pool in his backyard"

"a pool?!" you nod, chuckling

"you heard right. but anyways, i was sitting on one of the sunchairs by the pool and i had fallen asleep. steve picked me up and threw me into the pool. i was angry at him for throwing me into the pool. so i had an idea. i asked him if he could grab my hand and help me out the pool. he listened, and instead of getting out, i pulled him into the pool with me," wendy starts laughing and you have a smile on your face.

"he then got mad at me, but i thought it was the funniest thing ever. i was laughing and laughing and steve came up behind me, then spun me around to face him and he cut my laughter off by giving me a kiss" wendy's smiling big and she looks between you and steve. but then she looks at steve, getting serious.

"don't push y/n in the pool again while she's trying to sleep" he nods

"i haven't done it since" she nods, crossing her arms across her chest.

"wendy!" wendy gets up at the sound of her mom's voice.

"bye wendy" you and steve both say

"bye stevie! bye y/n!" she walks back into the house and steve turns to face you.

"you're good at lying" steve says to you

"i'm a trained actor. maybe you should take some tips from me"

"seriously though, y/n, how do you come up with this shit so quickly?" you shrug

"i just say what comes to the top of my brain. how do you think authors write stories? steve, if you think about it, writing stories is like telling one big lie" he mulls over your words before nodding

"you got a point there"

"never doubt me, harrington" he rolls his eyes

"what do you wanna do today?" you perk up at his question

"i was hoping i could get you to go see top gun with me"

"you and tom cruise. i swear"

"what can i say? i love duality in a man" he laughs

"fine. fine. we can go see top gun later" you nod, getting excited

"do we want to take wendy for ice cream before or after? because you already know laura will say yes" you ask him

"before"

"so, around 2 ish maybe?" he nods and you make a mental note to get ready around 1. it was already nearing twelve so it gave you an hour to do whatever.

"what do you want to do until then?"

"we could go to the vineyard again"

"yes" your answer comes out quickly and steve laughs

"you're eager to go back"

"it's gorgeous down there, how can i not be excited" he pats your leg then stands up.

"let me go change out of my pajamas and ill be back and then we can head down there, yeah?" you nod and he heads back inside. it didn't take him long to change because five minutes later he was back at your side and in fresh clothes.

"alright. let's go" you stand up and the two of you walk side-by-side as you head to the vineyard. once you two see the familiar trees, you head over, steve right behind you.

"do you guys have any wine that you've made?" he nods

"back at home i have some. and there's some at the house if you want to try it later. i'm sure mom will let you take a bottle home with you if you want"

"uh... hell yeah. i got new episodes of general hospital to watch" he laughs and nods

"alright. we'll take a bottle back home with us"

"fine by me" you two continue to walk around, taking everything in. you make some conversation along the way. by that, you mean it was mainly steve talking about how dustin is "cheating on him with eddie" by that, he means dustin has found a new babysitter. you keep telling steve that he will always be dustin's number one babysitter and there's no changing that. you eventually get him to shut up about it and accept that he wasn't replaced.

"time check?" steve checks his watch

"12:45"

"god damn. we need to head back so i can get ready and we can head out since it takes thirty minutes to get to the ice cream parlor"

"what you're wearing isn't good?" you look at him as if he just said tom cruise wasn't hot.

"steve. this is basic female 101. we have a different outfit for everything. and for going out, i need a different outfit" he rolls his eyes but sighs.

"alright, let's go" you both head back to the house and you head upstairs to get changed as steve waits downstairs for you. he asked you to grab his car keys on your way out, so once you were done, you grabbed his keys and headed back to him. only to see that he wasn't where he last was.

"he went outside to put wendy's car seat back into his car" laura says, coming up beside you. you nod and stand there awkwardly.

"he cares about you a lot, y'know?" laura says, breaking the silence. you look over at her

"yeah?" she nods

"i haven't seen him care this much about anyone... ever" that familiar fluttering feeling is back and you push it to the back of your mind.

"what about nancy?" by the way he acted after their breakup, you were positive he had to care about her at least a little more than he does with you.

"nancy?" she furrows her brows

"yeah. did he not tell you about nancy?" she shakes her head

"you're the first girlfriend i've met of his" your face must be displaying shock because she then speaks up

"y/n. listen to me when i say this. steve has never brought any girl to meet his family. ever. you're the first. so trust me when i say that you're more special than anyone. and definitely more special than you may think" you absentmindedly nod and she gives you a soft smile. steve then walks back inside, placing his hands on his hips. typical steve.

"alright, we're all ready to go. wendy's already out there and buckled up. did it by herself again" he looks at you and laughs and you laugh with him. however, your mind is elsewhere. you both say bye to laura and that you'll be back as soon as possible. you slide into the passenger seat and stare off at the scenery.

wendy talks steve's ear off the whole time, but you're silent. he notices something's wrong with you. he gently places a hand on your leg and you look over at him to see him already looking at you.

"everything okay?" you nod

"yeah. just thinking"

"that's never good" you playfully smack his arm and he laughs

"but seriously. anything bothering you?" you shake your head

"i'm okay steve" he holds out his pinky finger

"promise?" you interlock your pinky with his

"promise" he nods and soon you three are pulling into the ice cream parlor. wendy grabs both you and steve's hand and she does that thing where she runs and you two lift her up. when you get inside, the lady from the other times you came here isn't behind the counter. instead it's a guy no older than you and steve.

"what can i get you guys started with today?" wendy looks up at steve

"can i order first?"

"go ahead sweetheart" she excitedly tells the young boy behind the counter her order and he chuckles, but makes it. you and steve then give him your order and this time, steve pays. once you three sit down, wendy digs into her ice cream and you face steve.

"i could've paid"

"i wanted to pay you back for wednesday night"

"steve. i told you to let me take care of you. which means letting me pay for ice cream" he shakes his head

"that doesn't count"

"fine. then i'm paying for the movie later"

"you can't do that" you smirk at him, a mischievous glint in your eyes.

"we'll see about that"

"i don't like that look, y/n" you shrug, taking a bite of your ice cream. once you three are done, you have to clean wendy's face of chocolate residue again and then you're back on the way home.

"y/n, i'm going to miss you when you leave" your heart melts. you've grown so attached to the kids in the short time you've known them. you turn in your seat to look back at her.

"i'm going to miss you too, wendy. but you can always come visit sometime, yeah? if your mom says yes though" she nods and you turn back around to face the road. once you see the familiar house come into view, you all get out, steve putting wendy's car seat back into laura's car.

"mommy, can i visit y/n sometime at her house?" laura looks up at you

"she was telling me on the way back here how she was going to miss me once i left here and i told her if it was okay with you, if you guys could visit sometime" she nods

"oh that's more than fine with me" you smile

"great"

"so is that a yes?" wendy asks and her mom nods. she squeals of excitement and you chuckle.

"why is she squealing?" steve asks, coming to stand beside you. before you can answer, wendy answers for you.

"mommy said i can visit y/n at her house sometime after we leave here!" steve has the same reaction as you to her excitement.

"oh really now?" wendy nods excitedly. she then turns to face her mom

"mommy, did you know that stevie threw y/n into a pool while she was trying to nap?" laura raises a brow at wendy.

"oh really now?"

"yeah. then y/n pulled him into the pull with her and they had their first kiss" laura laughs at her daughter's excitement and faces you two.

"she's very curious" you tell her and she nods

"oh that she is" you all share a laugh and then you feel something tug your pants leg. you look down and see the little bundle of joy you've grown to love. david's making grabby hands up at you and you pick him up.

"david, bud, what're you doing? where's your mommy?"

"kitchen" you nod and you head to the kitchen, apologizing to laura for having to leave. steve stays back and talks to her though.

as david said, cynthia is standing in the kithcen talking to diane. diane happens to see you and david

"i see david found y/n" cynthia turns around and laughs to herself.

"he can't seem to leave you alone, huh?" you shake your head

"it seems not. but i don't mind the company"

"i'm just glad he's with you and not by himself" diane excuses herself, leaving you and cynthia standing there.

"look, i don't mean to spoil the mood by bringing this back up. but wednesday night... you made me love you even more. nobody has ever stood up to jack and put him in his place. steve is so lucky to have you, y/n" you give her a soft smile

"speaking off, where is he? usually he follows you around like your shadow"

"tell me about it" you grumble and she laughs. speak of the devil and he shall appear. steve then steps into the kitchen

"so. i talked with laur, and wendy's going to come stay the night with me in two weeks. and wendy said she's going to bring her teacups so the three of us can have a tea party after we go swimming in the pool. and i was given verys strict orders by her to not throw you in the pool anymore" cynthia is listening to steve talk and looking back and forth between you two.

"well, whatever princess wendy says, goes. right?" he nods. cynthia then speaks up

"is there something i'm missing here?"

"oh. wendy asked when steve and had our first kiss and long story short, it was in steve's pool after he threw me in while i was napping" cynthia starts laughing and shakes her head

"seems like a steve thing to do" you nod

"a very steve thing to do" david then starts to squirm a bit in your arms and makes grabby hands at cynthia. she takes him

"seems like it's his nap time already" you wave bye to david and he waves back, the two of them heading out the kitchen. you turn to steve.

"when do you want to leave to see the movie?"

"i was thinking we could see the 8 o' clock showing?" you nod

"fine by me"

"that gives us a few hours to kill. i think we have twister somewhere if you want to do that. i can get my mom to operate the spinny thingy"

"i'm gonna win" you tell him and he shakes his head

"not before i do" you roll your eyes

"we'll see about that, pretty boy" ten minutes later, you and steve are an entangled mess on the mat. diane's watching with humor.

"harrington, if i feel your hand on my ass one more time, i'm going to start to think that you're just using this game as an excuse to touch it"

"i told you i don't have good balance" you roll your eyes from your twisted position. diane spins for steve again

"left foot green" steve tries to maneuver his left foot to green, but he fails and ends up falling, making you the winner. you stand up

"haha! told you i'd win" he crosses his arms from his position on the floor. you bend down and kiss the top of his head

"'s alright stevie, not all of us can be winners" you walk past him, not before ruffling his hair. you head up to you guys' shared room, then locking the door behind you. you had to move quick. you look around for steve's wallet, finding it on the nightstand on his side of the bed. you grab it and take all his money out, then putting said money in his suitcase. you were paying for the movie tonight whether he liked it or not. lucky you, he took a twenty earlier out of his wallet and brought it with for ice cream instead of bringing his whole wallet.

you put his wallet back in place as if nobody touched it and then you quickly unlocked the bedroom door and headed back to the bed, falling back onto it. you stared at the ceiling for what felt like five minutes, surrounded in your thoughts before the door opened.

"figured this is where you ran off to. it was either here or the terrace" you don't answer steve back, still staring at the ceiling deep in thought. steve comes to stand by the bed and looks at you. he then plops down beside you.

"just thinking again?"

"yeah"

"is it about the same topic as earlier?"

"mhm" you two lie there in silence before you start to doze off.

you're then woken up by someone softly shaking you.

"y/nnnnnnnn," they drag out your voice. "wake up sleepyhead. we gotta go see top gun" you shoot up in your spot and frantically look at steve

"what time is it?"

"6:30" you let out a sigh of relief

"i'm not gonna let you sleep through our plans. what do you want to do with the thirty minutes we have to spare?"

"dunno" steve then perks up

"lets ask each other questions"

"okay. you start off" steve sits there for a minute and thinks of a question to ask you

"what's your favorite childhood memory?" you had to think long and hard about this one before a memory came to mind.

"probably... the time anthony almost fell off our roof while him and i were star gazing" you let out a quiet chuckle and steve joined you.

"he's always putting himself in danger"

"all the time. my turn. what's your favorite childhood memory?"

"the first time my mom took me to the vineyard. i ran around it like you did" he smiles fondly at the memory, then speaks up to ask you your question.

"what's something you've never told anyone?" you have to think for a minute.

"i used to have a crush on eddie in elementary school"

"really?"

"yepp. back when he had a buzz" you laugh at it and steve joins you

"i think it was the fact that he was the only guy in my class that didn't tease me" you pause for a bit before speaking again. 'what's your guilty pleasure?"

"ferrah fawcett"

"you're so predictable" you smile and he smiles back

"my turn. biggest fear?"

"you're gonna judge me" you cover up your face with your hands and steve prys them away.

"this is a judgement free zone"

"that's very hypocritical of you to say" he rolls his eyes, waiting for your answer to his question.

"...moths"

"moths?"

"see, i knew you'd judge me"

"i'm not judging you. 'm just curious for the backstory?"

"there's no backstory. just the way they look freaks me out" he nods, listening to your answer. not laughing at you or judging you like you thought he'd do.

"anyways, my turn. any regrets in life?"

"oh yeah. a ton"

"what are they?"

"ah ah ah. that's not the question you asked"

"fine," you roll your eyes

"if you had to save one person in the zombie apocalypse, who would it be?"

"mmmm, this is a hard one. i'm gonna have to go with my brother"

"so you'd let me die?" you shrug

"you only said one person. maybe if you had said two, you'd be on the list" he huffs

"what's your regrets in life?"

"i knew you were gonna ask that"

"guess i'm as predictable as you, harrington" he waves you off

"yeah yeah. let's see. one of my regrets in life is not telling my dad off and just letting him do whatever he pleased" you frown at his answer.

"steve, you're one of the most caring people i know. you just wanted to keep the peace among everyone. you just want what's best for everyone and he was taking advantage of your kindness. there's no need to feel regret. he should be the one feeling regret for not realizing he has an amazing son" steve then pulls you into a hug and it's as though you can feel every emotion he's feeling in the hug. he hugs you tight and you hug him back, rubbing your hand up and down his back soothingly.

"y/n, thank you. for everything. i don't know where i'd be if i didn't have you" you want to crack a joke, out of habit, but you know that right now steve needs this. so you refrain from doing so. you two just sit there for a while, not letting go of one another until steve glaces down at his watch.

"shiit. we should leave now. it's gonna take us thirty minutes to get to the theatre" you two pull apart from one another and steve grabs his keys, heading out the door. you follow behind him and then you're both off and on the road again. the sun was starting to set and you wanted to stay in this moment forever.

next to the moon & stars, your brother, and steve, sunsets were your favorite thing in the world. you'd seen so many sunsets in your life and every single one of them was different. you loved the way the sky was painted different shades of orange, pink, purple and blue. like one big mural. to you, sunsets were a reminder that each day is different, so you must treat it that way.

"you good over there?" steve asks, breaking you out of your thoughts.

"yeah. just admiring the sunset"

"well, i hate to cut your admiring a bit short. but we've arrived at our destination" you look in front of you to see that you did, indeed, arrive at the theatre. you and steve get out of his car, heading to get a ticket.

"what movie?"

"top gun" the lady tells you your total and steve goes to open his wallet and pay, but he sees that he has no money. you give the lady the amount that you owe and she hands you two tickets for top gun. you and steve head inside and he looks at you.

"seriously? you took all my money out my wallet?" you shrug

"told you i was paying" he sighs and you guys go ahead and get your popcorn and drinks, heading to where you needed to go. you and steve sit in the very back, making conversation as you wait for the movie to begin. the best thing about going at night, was that there weren't as many people in the room so you didn't have to worry about your volume. yeah, you still kept it quiet for those who were sharing the room with you, but you didn't have to be as quiet.

you and steve watched top gun and by that, you mean you ogled at tom cruise the whole time. steve, however, was very engrossed into the movie. you were too, but some of the details in the movie seemed to go in one ear out the other. you and steve filed out of the theatre, stretching your limbs and letting out yawns.

"so? what'd you think about it?" you asked steve

"i'm glad i agreed to go with you. definitely was worth it" you nodded in agreement

"see? i have the better judgment here"

"whatever you say" as if on cue, you let out a yawn

"tired?"

"that would be the understatement of the century. i'm exhausted" he chuckles and you two get into the car. it's now pitch black outside, so staring out the window at the scenery to keep you awake is a no. you might as well take another nap. so that's what you do. you don't know when you got into bed, but you're assuming steve carried you up.

he gently shook you awake

"hey, do you want to change into something more comfortable to sleep in?" you nod, your eyes closed. steve grabs your pajamas and hands them to you

"can you turn around or close your eyes? i don't feel like getting up and changing in the bathroom right now" steve nods and he turns his back to you. you change into your pajamas as quick as you could, wanting to get back to sleep.

"okay. you're good" he turns back around and sees you making yourself comfortable in bed. you toss your clothes you previously had on over to the side, making a mental note to deal with them when you woke up. steve slides into the bed beside you and he doesn't even bother trying with the tv. both of you too tired anyways.

"night steve" you say, turning on your side and closing your eyes, going back to sleep.

"night y/n" he turns his bedside lamp off and you two fall asleep. thankfully, you didn't wake up with his knee in your back.

tags: @btsinurmom @lovelyela @fezcomybeloved @manuosorioh @preciousbabypeter @in-this-minute @k-k0129 @prettysbliss @hcloangcls @simonsbluee @joekeeryswife @scoobiessnacks @sorrenthesonnetwriter @goldenbrokenheart @mess-in-side @chocolatepizzatyrant @frostandflamesfanfic

join my tag list: tag list

masterlist: masterlist

a/n: sorry i didn't post this at the usual time i do, i got caught up in watching jane the virgin. but here it is

[mde1011]

some quotes i jotted down from that wonderful stream of tommy‘s (some lore spoilers)

“do you smoke sam” “all the time”

“i thought you were talking about the- the speeeeed drug”

“have you ever sold drugs to kids sam?” “......no”

“shecure is a hard word how do you say it? secure? shecure?” “...secure...?”

“we can’t let the girlboss rule because she will gatekeepe my feelings” “that would not be pog”

“THEY DIDNT INVITE ME TO KILL ME???? NOW I HAVE FOMO”

“i’ll load it up king- ive started saying king a lot” “yeah yeah i’ve noticed i like it” “you are admittedly a king sam so”

“strong man” “how does TWIG rhyme with STRONG??????”

“you have obviously taken part in scientology-“ “i have not-“ “you’ve donated to tom cruises cult shit”

“....am i worse than david dobrik?” “are- are we worse than david dobrik?” “oh- oh god”

“cAPTAIN PUFFY IS YOUR LAWYER????” “she IS? I HAVE A LAWYER THATS NOT BIG Q OR BIG LAW?”

“DONT TELLL RANBOO IM UPSET IM NOT UPSET IM FINE IM FINE”

“............howd the talk with the lawyer go.....sounded like it went pretty well” “sam. samuel” “oh god what’s happening you called me samuel”

“gotta go get some la-piss”

“come and hang out i am live it will be nice come and hang out kings” “o-oh you just pinged the WHOLE discord wow-“ “maybe vikkstar will come”

“doNT SAY YOURE LOVING THIS CHAT I AM IN PERIL”

“he has broke one of the rules of the hit best seller ‘the bible’- this kind of looks like a cock”

“well i’ve moved now, KING”

“what is an angsty teen and am i one? because when i USED to hang out with tubbo and ranboo they used the word angst a lot”

“yeah yeah yeah i bench”

“sam i think i’m angsty i think i’m an angsty tik tok teen looking for a community to help me out”

“i don’t think you’ve followed the train of logic all the way-“ “there’s a TRAIN INVOLVED????????”

“i’m like the orange fucker from that animated rom com”

“THIS IS WHO I NEEDED RIGHT NOW IM IN PERIL I AM ANGRY- oh wait that’s wrong that’s wrong-“ “angry is different from angsty”

“i need a lawyer and they need to be big and strong and angry and ready to fight”

“what’s wrong with killing somebody?” “.........HEY nononononono don’t think i forget when you locked me in there you- you PSYCO FREAK” “you should talk to your lawyer about that”

📷

“i can read minds” “what am i th-“ “tits” “what”

“shUT UP PUSSY”

“you just- you just do NOT have blue balls”

“you think this guy will win?” “SHUT THE FUCK UP” “I LIKE THIS GUY”

“STOP STARING AT MY TIE YOU ARE OBJECTIFYING ME” “I DONT MEAN TO-“ “U ARE-“ “ITS A WONDERFUL TIE-“

“i can’t look away it’s just so-“

“i’m under the influence of big cock”

“it’s meeee big cock man”

“i cant look away” “sam please use your twitter alt for this” “he’s horny on maaaainnnnn” “and what’s wrong with that?” “.......”

“you’re a FUCKING IDIOT” “IM NOT A FUCKING IDIOT, BIG COCK”

“i’m gonna call you ‘cockity’ big cock” “sHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT THE FUCK UP-“

“STOP LOOKING AT IT” “ITS SO VIBRANT”

“at least this guy doesn’t have a cock-“ “itS NOT A COCK” “horny on main jesus-“

“is that a cock” “SHUT THE FUCK UP”

“.....i wanna see the inside of it again do a split”

“i heard....i heard there is a big cock in town....”

“why did you say that to me jesus” “did you just come for the cock?”

“nOOOO JESUS JESUS GO AWA-“

“okay sam-“ “tommy that guy wants your cock-“ “no- no he doesn’t sam”

“i- i just looked to my right and the entire chat is just ‘E E E E E I’”

“sam, sam and i need you to hear this....dont. act. up.” “i don’t act up-“ “you were acting up-“ “i-“ “you were caught in 8k.” “but- but we both agree it’s not a tie-“

“please don’t tell me to kill cockity i am overwhelmed”

“why is there an anus in my tie?”

“what are the legal implications of this?” “...i mean besides hell you’re good”

“jack mana-bitch”

“whatre the legal implications?” “i mean usually that’s a no-no but today, today it’s fine” “yeahhh lets go murder his family”

<Foolish_Gamers was blown up by awesamdude> “hahahahgahah” “wHY ARE YOU DEAD??? WHY IS OUR LAWYER DEAD” “that- killing jesus is a big no-no”

“jesus is back ayyyy” “three whole days ayyy he’s back from the cave” “that was three whole minutes” “he speedran it” “why didn’t he do that in the bestseller?” “are you referring to the best seller called ‘the bible’?”

“i’d be an antivax landlord”

“i’m real like are-kansas” “that’s not REAL” “it IS”

“you’re projecting your own problems onto me, puss” “wHAT THE FUCK”

“i just don’t want you to girlboss me”

“i am the girlboss and i will gatekeep” “you are a girlboss”

“we will join vc two and then we’re gonna gatekeep them and the we’re gonna gaslight them”

“that’s such a funny joke man-“ “it’s not a joke. dollywood is real”

“does anyone have cocaine?” “ooooh i remember when you did cocaine last night awesamdude”

“jesus never does drugs” “well- well you turned water into wine king and wine is alcohol”

“can you put on pants i can’t- i cant stop looking at it- sorry tommy i know you said-“ “yeah sam i know you tried-“

“you know i fuck with satan”

“i’m sorry jesus lucifer is just such a good man-“ “oh you- hold me BACK FROM THIS FUCKER HOLD ME BACK ILL SEND HIM TO HELL YOU LIKE HELL-“

“are you jesus or just a man who grew a beard and put on a suit?”

“even the guy with his cock out is telling you to stop-“ “oh jesus, and i mean jesus-“ “shUT THE FUCK UP MAN”

“the best best way to slander him is to stop his offspring; we need to kick him the balls.....no? not a good....? alright us four each take a ball-“

“......jack manifold has four balls?”

“......why did jesus give him four scrotums man🙁🙁”

<Quackity fell from a high place>

<awesamdude> BIG COCK DOWN

[sohin-ace]

Bucci gang hc with a female team member that's always tired and sleeping but has lightning fast reflexes? Like, she's always tired and sluggish but she always manages to survive and complete missions. Every. Single. Dang. Time.

Didn't write dialogue for Abba because his HC was so long already.

Bucci gang w/ a chronically tired S/O HC

Bucciarati

The least worried of the group, but still somewhat concerned.

He knew what you were capable of. He took you in after seeing the extent of your abilities. It didn't matter what the gang thought of you at first, they would eventually understand, was what he told you.

He's never seen someone so physically drained in his life and he'd love to believe that you may have a clinical condition that explains it.

Gets so frustrated when you don't listen to him during briefings and go to do your things on your own in missions.

It's so dangerous and he gets so scared. Even if you always succeed, sometimes without a single scratch, he still can't help but worry.

He stomps to you and when you think he's going to yell at you or slap you for being so reckless, he instead takes you in his arms, relieved.

"It's only a matter of time until something happens to you... God you scare me..."

Otherwise, he has no problems letting you lean onto him when you're feeling spent, or want to nap on him in the car.

Abbachio

Really? That was the new member Bucciarati trusted and brought in?

He was so pissed and frustrated whenever you laid halfway onto the table during meetings, or dozed off when someone reported for duty.

You were so lazy, undisciplined and churlish he couldn't stand it at times.

Some people, like him, worked their ASSES off to get to where they were, and you were just hunched over and drooling?

He was okay with a member feeling a bit sick or tired occasionally, especially if it was Bruno who overworked, but you were just too much!

He constantly slaps you to wake you up or get your attention and scolds you for it.

The way you handled the missions with such endeavour and skill was so contradictory to your usual slow attitude, he was so surprised.

To be honest he's terrified. How could someone be so two-faced?

But now he finally understood why you had been taken here by Bucciarati. You were indeed a valuable addition to the team, he had to recognize it.

It takes time for him to actually trust you and make sure you won't betray them, but he's still very admirative.

Giorno

He wouldn't show it but he was a bit worried. About the gang but mostly about you.

He guessed that you had some vitamin defficiency or anemia maybe? That would explain it, but he was no doctor.

He likes to believe that you're not just plain lazy and careless. If Bucciarati took you in, it was for a reason, he wanted to trust you.

And he was absolutely right.

He had been stuck, alone and in the verge of death on one dreadful mission. Nobody was there, and he couldn't call out for help.

He had used Golden Experience as a desperate last resort to call for one of the members, but he had no hope of anyone coming just in time to save him.

He was beyond shocked when, barely a few minutes after his call, you bursted through the place at lightspeed and took him away, not letting anyone even find you as you brought him to safety.

How did you come in so fast? Where were all the enemies? Did you... take them out all by yourself?

"Thank you, Y/N... I... I owe you my life..."

Otherwise, he puts a bunch of flowers and leaves on your hair when you nap.

Mista

He was pretty laid-back and lazy himself sometimes too. When he sees you chilling, sleeping, looking all jaded he just chuckles and join you in.

When you join the gang at first, he doesn't doubt that you could be a great spy, or a healer, maybe you could spot enemies like Narancia?

Surely he was NOT prepared for what kind of abilities you truly hid behind your tired and deviant facade.

The way you were fighting and the speed and clarity in your movements, he couldn't even catch everything with his two eyes.

The pistols had called for you, as Mista was in a dire situation and surely enough, you were there mere minutes after. He wondered if you had teleporting abilities or if your Stand gave you some kind of hyper speed. Turns out, you were just that fast.

You told him to hang in there and took his gun to finish off the enemies. Taking them one by one.

Your tone and the energy you had in your voice sent electricity down his spine. You were so... Different than what you has used him to.

You patch him up with expertise and he can't help but stare at you like you were a Godly revelation.

"Not gonna lie Y/N, that was kinda hot..."

Narancia

Pranks you all day. And I mean ALL DAY.

There's a recurring joke about how you're going to be the first one to die because of how lazy you are and how you're probably gonna fall asleep mid-fight.

Bucciarati does not like those jokes, at all.

Takes great pleasure in waking you up in the loudest and most obnoxious way possible just to see you flinch and panick.

"Giorno, put a centipede in Y/N's ear. Come on it's gonna be fun!"

How do you manage to sleep with him, Mista and Fugo fooling around next to you all the time, that was a grand mystery.

He brings you pizza, claiming 'you need vitamins'. Because everyone knows pizza have the perfect amounts of nutrients...

He's so impressed and admirative of you when you absolutely kill it during missions. It's like you're a completely different person, he doesn't recognize you.

He's your number 1 fanboy, please sign him an autograph because wow, you're so incredible he can't believe you're real.

It's incredibly funny how you immediately start to yawn and sleep in the car right after the Tom Cruise stunts you just pulled 5 minutes ago.

Fugo

He thinks you're just lazy and he doesn't feel comfortable with you here at first.

Like Abbachio, he wonders what went on Bucciarati's mind to even recruit somebody like you?

But at the same time he's very curious. Did you have some kind of strange disorder he's never heard of?

Every time he saw you, you were either sleeping, slumped over, or just plain out of it.

Are you doing this on purpose to mess with him or piss him off? Because if you are, it's working.

He forces coffee, orange juice, soda, anything down your throat to keep you awake and focused on missions, and when you refuse, he starts biting his nails.

"You better stay focused on this one I swear to God...!"

He's so scared and anxious you're gonna fuck it all up and get someone, or worse even, yourself killed just because you're a careless slug.

When he sees how operational and strong you were and how incredibly fast you acted during missions, his view on you does a complete 180.

In the end, your down-toned presence was very cooling for his angry soul, and he couldn't afford to lose you so stupidly and easily...

Trish

The first time she saw you she wasn't too surprised to see you napping and being a bit slow.

You were in the mafia after all, not necessarily the calmest and chillest occupation. It was okay to feel sleepy once in a while... Or all the time.

She even believed that you weren't just tired physically, but rather maybe you were tired of them.

And honestly? She relates.

But when one day on a mission you went from dragging your feet slowly like a drunkard to swiftly grabbing her, lifting her in your arms like she weighted nothing and running like a freaking cheetah a second after hearing gunshots, she was FLABBERGASTED.

First of all, WHAT? Second of all, HOW? She is so shaken and her eyes couldn't possibly get any wider. You went from 0 to 100 REAL FAST.

She's even wondering if that's really you holding her right now or if you have been possessed or something.

When you show her a characteristic tired smirk as you run, all her doubts are wiped and she's so charmed and impressed, you litterally and figuratively sweeped her off her feet.

"You... You're amazing Y/N..."

[ikleesfiction]

I'm a fucking alcoholic (with a sweet tooth)

Fandom : Chicago PD TV Word count : 1,623 words Pairing : Jay Halstead x reader Author's note : This is the third one shot of "Will you follow through if I fall for you" fic continuation. It would be better if you read it first. But if you don't, here's the quick summary. Warning : It's fluff. I hope it doesn't end up too cringy?

Disclaimer

◢◤

It is a cold Friday in Chicago. You would say it is super cold since you worked in the warm weather of Los Angeles last week. Jay is coming over to your place after work. Now both of you are snuggling on the couch, watching movies on TV.

"I cannot watch this part," You hide your face in Jay's chest, preparing for the frightening scene. The darkness in the room increases the tension.

"What are you talking about? This is not even a horror movie," Jay looks down at you, bemused.

"Say you! Watching Tom Cruise blowing up a Gallardo distressed me. My soul is crying. It is a nightmare!"

You move out from Jay's embrace to point out the screen where Maggie Q said it is such a nice car. "Yes, it is! Don't do it, Zhen," yell you at the TV.

However, The Lamborghini on screen still went kaboom and was engulfed in fire. "Oh, no!" You put your hand on your heart, feeling devastated.

Jay grins at your silliness, "I'm sorry for your loss," He rubs your back, offering his condolences. However, his smile turns flirty. "If there's anything I can do to ease your pain..."

You play along with his idea. "Hmm, is that so?" Your hands wrap around Jay, pulling him closer. Your nose is tracing his neck, up to his jaw, his cheek. Your lips softly grace his skin, make their way closer to his. Jay wasted no time to kiss you and keep kissing you.

You don't know how long it goes, and you don't care to know. Until Jay moves back abruptly, tilting his head away from you, "Your pho..."

Your lips cut his words as you get on his lap. Jay puts his hands on your waist to stop you, halfheartedly, "Babe, your phone is ringing,"

Your hands curl behind his neck. "Let it ring." You whisper to his ear. Jay shudders when he feels your breath on his neck. Your mouth soon follows to make a mark on the same point. Jay tries to hold himself back from reciprocating the gesture.

Unlike Jay and his work, you got no obligation to pick up your phone. No life or death depends on you tonight. But the phone keeps shrieking. It started to annoy you because Jay stops participating in this make-out session.

"Might be important," This is one of the rare times you want to curse Jay's occupation.

"I assure you it won't be," You try to get Jay back in the game.

"Well, at least you can tell them to call you back later," Jay lands a soft kiss on your forehead. With a loud sigh, you move away from Jay's lap to pick up your phone.

Seeing the caller ID frustrates you even further. "You are interrupting our date night," is the first thing you say to your best friend, Alex, when you receive the call and put it on speaker.

"Hi, Jay!" Alex chirps his greeting, ignoring your complaint.

Jay greets back with a chuckle, "Hey, man. Nice to hear from you," He takes the remote to pause the movie, where Tom Cruise is gunning a Mercedes CLK down the road.

"No, it's not." You grumble under your breath. "What's up? Did you just come up with a song idea that would make Bruno Mars wished he wrote it?"

As a fellow songwriter/producer, you understand that song inspiration could come anytime. But it would still piss you off if Alex insists on working for it tonight.

"Not yet. But we do have a potential project for you,"

"Couldn't it wait until next week?" You moan your refusal. "Jay and I got plans for the weekend,"

"Of course. As long as you promise to pick up your phone when Angelique calls. I know you have been dodging her." Alex chides you.

Huffing your aversion, you lay your head on Jay's lap. In reflex, he plays with your hair. "Who's Angelique? A new talent?" Jay never heard that name before. He is pretty sure that he knows everybody at Pyramid, Alex's record label in Amsterdam where you work for.

Alex starts to explain, "She is a singer. Been around for a while,"

"Country singer, turned bubblegum pop singer, and now I guess she wants to try dance music as well?" You elaborate to Jay and asking Alex at the same time. You have written and produced songs from various genres, but your notable works so far are mostly EDM.

"Maybe," Alex answers casually.

"Angelique..." Jay ponders for a moment before lighting up, "Oh! Is she the one whose songs you keep skipping whenever they pop up, babe?"

Your best friend lets out a big laugh from the other side of the phone. "Angelique wants Y/N to produce her next album, but all of a sudden Y/N here cannot find the receive button on her phone," Alex emphasizes his sarcasm.

"I took yours, didn't I?"

However, Alex begins his interrogation. "Why are you avoiding her calls anyway?"

"I don't wanna work with her," You know you sound petulant.

"Come on, Y/N, it would be great! Angelique's third album sold triple more than her second. Her last single went neck to neck with Taylor Swift's song. Now, she is gonna let you work on her fourth album! Other producers would kill for this opportunity," Alex tries to reason.

Jay whistles, being impressed by the story.

"Well, my boyfriend here is a cop. I don't wanna get involved in any criminal activity," You are intentionally being obtuse. "If it were so great, why don't you do it? You're the one who still works on stage."

"You know people talked about how you could be the next Max Martin, right? Made sense that she asked for you," Alex states. "Angelique doesn't need another artist to perform with her. She needs someone who writes and produces good stuff."

"Every producer could be the next Max Martin if they work hard," You shrug the notion.

Jay looks confused with all these new names. "And Max Martin is...?"

"We are never ever ever getting back together?" Alex starts singing a couple bars to show Jay some examples of Max Martin's works.

"Uh..." Jay doesn't show any recognition.

"ou make me feel like I'm living a teenage dream?" Alex sings another song. Your best friend is nothing but persistent.

"Uhm.." And yet, Jay is still clueless.

"Jay is not keeping up with pop music for the last decade, Lex," You joke to your best friend. "Try some songs from the Backstreet Boys,"

"Hey!" Jay protests. "I know your songs," He smirks at you in full smug. "Especially the ones that were written about me."

You laugh at his adorable and sexy smirk. Sitting up from Jay's lap, you kiss the smug out of him.

"Guys, I'm still here." The flat tone of Alex on the phone stops Jay from taking the kiss further.

You peck a corner of Jay's lips one more time. "Your own fault. Who told you to call during our date night anyway?"

"Since I'm not there to poke and pinch you, I hope Jay could help me convince you to take this project." Your best friend is shameless.

"Is Angelique not a good person or something?" Jay tries to understand the situation. He knows you are a hard worker. It is rare for you to run off from a big project like this. "She ought to be a good singer, right? With all of that achievements,"

You cross your arms and glare at your boyfriend, "It is a prerogative to hate your best friend's exes, no?"

Jay frowns, "Wait, Angelique is Alex's ex?"

"Oh, come on!" groans Alex. "It was years ago!"

"You know how the saying goes. Quote-unquote, "You are my friend. She is your ex. You get to forgive and move on. I get to hold a grudge until I die”

"That was kinda harsh," Jay comments.

"Your best friend still hates me until now, Jay." You roll your eyes at your boyfriend.

"Mouse doesn't hate you. I even haven't got a chance to tell him about you since he's been deployed," Jay raises his eyebrows.

"She meant your work partner," Alex answers Jay for you.

Jay frowns deeper, "Hailey doesn't hate you."

"Wanna bet on that?" You challenge him.

Alex prevents the couple from bickering further, "Guys, listen! Angelique and I broke up amicably. There were no hard feelings between us now,"

"Excuse you!" You exclaim. "I still remember those dark days. You cried over so many Tequila bottles. And those boxes of chocolate!! Why did we have to consume that much chocolate over a breakup?? My waistline did not come back to its original measurement for three months!!"

Jay lets out an amused snort.

"Oh, you don't get to talk, man!" Alex hits the couple back. "Your temporary breakup also forced me to replenish my Jenever stocks! I got bakeries phone numbers on speed dial for chocolate cake emergencies!"

Jay puts his hands up in surrender. "Okay, okay. You guys continue to discuss business," He stands up from the couch. "I'm gonna go warm up some pie," Jay gestures to the kitchen area. "Alex, it's nice to catch up with you. Hope the next time we talk, it would be more social and less about business,"

"And you, love, try to listen to what Alex offers first before you cut him off," Jay bends down to kiss your lips teasingly. "Please don't pull out any bottles with more than 40% alcohol content. I need you sober for our plans tonight." He winks at you before moving to the kitchen, leaving you to deal with your pushy best friend alone.

+x Taglist +x

@lorenakaspersen @life-treatments @itsdesiree86

Foot Note: - Tom Cruise and Maggie Q blew up a Lamborghini Gallardo in Mission: Impossible III (2006). All of the MI movies are classics in my household. - Max Martin is a Swedish record producer, songwriter. You might not know his name, but I'm sure you know his songs. In reference to this fic, he co-wrote and co-produced Taylor Swift's "We are never ever ever getting back together", co-wrote Katy Perry's "Teenage Dream", co-wrote and co-produced some of Backstreet Boys' biggest hits. - "You are my friend. She is your ex. You get to forgive and move on. I get to hold a grudge until I die" line is taken from Henrietta Wilson on 9-1-1 TV Series S02E04 "Stuck". I thought it was hilarious. The line became the reason for this particular fic's existence.

I'm sorry for the long note. Thank you for reading this fic and the note. You are so welcome to reply, ask or tag me. We can talk about music, series or Jesse Lee Soffer's abs. :p

[writingtoforgetreality]

“Who is she?” (Alexander Calvert x Reader)

Request: I would like to ask for something where Alex and the reader are dating and the two are part of the Supernatural cast, and they fake a fight in front of Jensen, Jared and Misha, but it ends in a cute moment. That's it lol. (by anonymous), [Actors-Masterlist]

Summary: You could not find the script you needed for an important upcoming audition. Still, you had to start practicing or you would not perform well. Luckily, Alex was always there to help you with your lines. But what would happen if things got out of hand?

Words: 1,937

Warnings: language, mentions of cheating, argument, protective!Jensen, fluff, (Y/E/C) = your eye color

If you like my work & wanna support me: a coffee would be highly appreciated ❤

“Alex?” you were currently in your shared apartment in Vancouver. Searching for a very important script, you slowly started to go insane. You could have sworn you put it right on top of the coffee table. Why was it not there anymore? Maybe Alex had seen it.

“Yeah?” his scruffy voice made you look up. He came straight out of the shower, only a towel hanging low on his waist. On every other day, this sight would have been an invitation for you but you had to find this damn script.

“Have you seen my script? I put it right there.” you pointed to the place where you last saw it.

“Um, I don´t know...Are you sure you left it there?” Alex got closer to you and started helping you. First the living room, then the kitchen. Soon after, it felt like you searched through your entire apartment, without luck.

“(Y/N), it´s time to head out. We´ll be late.” he disappeared in the bedroom and came out seconds later in a black hoodie and gray sweatpants. Why bother wearing anything else when you had to change as soon as you were on set?

“Ugh, okay. I´m coming.” it did not make sense to you. You needed that script. There was a very important audition coming up. A big movie with TOM CRUISE. Yes, you heard that right. An action film where you would portray his love interest. This would be your chance to really start at Hollywood. Your role in Supernatural was the first start and the fans loved you a lot. Just like Alex, you came around for the 13th season. At first, you were only meant to stick around for a few episodes. Just some girl who was saved by Jack and brought back to the bunker. The fans seemed to like you and they almost immediately caught up on the chemistry Alex and you shared. When you started dating, the writers decided to make your character Jack´s love interest. Now, the last few episodes were about to air and you still had not found your next job.

Of course you worked on it to change that. Supernatural was your first acting job, you were not the most famous in this industry. Jared had already found his next role: Texas Ranger. Jensen will be a part of the third season of The Boys. You were incredibly happy for them but it also scared the shit out of you. If it took them this long to be cast in another project, how long would it take you? That was something you should not be thinking about during your ride to the set of Supernatural. You should start preparing for the upcoming scenes.

The first half of the day was very productive. Ever since the thought of shooting the LAST episodes has sunken in, the crew really wanted to bring the best out of every scene. Still, Jensen, Jared and Misha loved to mess with Alex and you. There had to be enough scenes for the gag reel, right?

As the director called for lunch break, all of you made your way over to the catering area. You were not hungry, thoughts still with your lost script. Maybe you should just give them a call to let them know that you needed another script. No, that would not leave a good impression.

“When do we continue filming today?” Jensen asked.

“Uhhh, around 3 pm, I think?” Jared´s answer was not really helpful. Most days he had no idea about your schedule. One of the reasons that made you love him even more.

“For once you´re right.” Misha threw in.

Everyone headed back to their trailers, wanting to prepare for the next few scenes and relax a bit.

“Can you practice with me?” you asked Alex as you were walking towards your trailers. You did not share those because they were very small to begin with.

“Practice what? We rehearsed our shared scenes, like, a hundred times last night.” he chuckled, amused by your uncertainty. He knew how you barely ever forgot your lines or broke character yet you still wanted to keep on running through your lines.

“Nooo, I mean for the audition. It´s next week and if I don´t start going through it now I´ll be even more nervous.” you came to a halt, waiting for his reaction.

“I thought you lost the script?” Alex turned around to look at you.

“Misplaced. Anyway, I know the story more or less. We could just improvise. Please?” your big (Y/E/C) looked at him in a way you knew he could never resist.

“In my trailer or-”

“Actually, I think right here, outside, would be perfectly fine.” your smile grew. You loved acting alongside Alex. This role was not meant to be his but he was always happy to help you with auditions. You did the same for him. Recalling what was written on the script, you tried your best to explain the story to him. It was easy, really, your character found emails from another woman, arranging meetings that go way back, like seven months. The scene you had to prepare for the audition was you confronting “Tom Cruise” which ended in a big fight.

“Got it?” you watched Alex´ face closely, looking for any misunderstandings. A nod from his head made you get into character.

“Hey, honey, I´m home.” your back faced Alex, your body language seemingly tense. He moved closer to you as you did not answer him. A hand was held out to touch your shoulder but as soon as it came in contact with you, you brushed it off angrily. Turning around with tears in your eyes, Alex was impressed by how fast you could make this role alive, without even saying a word. You truly were magnificent.

“DO NOT call me honey!” you managed to keep the tears at bay, thinking it would be better to let them spill a bit later.

“What´s wrong?” Alex gave you space, getting the sign of you not wanting to be touched by him.

“Oh, so you don´t have anything to tell me?” your arms crossed in front of your chest, your eyebrows raising, waiting for him to answer you.

“Um, I´m not su-”

“BULLSHIT! Bullshit.” the second part was barely above a whisper, showing that, despite everything you saw, you still cared for him. Loved him, even. Alex just stood there, knowing what your next words would be like.

“How long has this been going on?” your gaze was focused on the floor, not wanting him to see your tears that now started spilling.

“She doesn´t mean anything to me. You are the on-” but once again, Alex was cut off by your screaming.

“Did you fuck her?” your voice was small, not wanting to ask this question but desperate for the answer.

“Sweetheart, I-”

“DID YOU FUCK HER?” this time you screamed at his face. Your emotions were all over the place.

What neither Alex nor you noticed was Jensen, Jared and Misha storming out of their trailers due to hearing screams. When they saw the scene in front of them, they came to a fast stop. Did they just hear that Alex had cheated on their (Y/N)? Someone who was like a little sister to them? Jensen made himself ready to storm to you, wanting nothing more than to punch Alex. Jared and Misha, though, held him back.

“Yes.” Alex sighed. “But it´s not like she means anything to me.” he once again came closer to you. This time you did not protest. You were too exhausted to react to it.

“Who is she?” scared of what the answer would be, you took a step back but looked straight into his eyes.

“Cassie.” you read Alex´ face as regret but as soon as you heard him say the name you could have thrown up.

“CASSIE?! MY BEST FRIEND CASSIE?!” you lunged towards him and started punching his chest, too weak to do any damage, but you were angry and did not know what else to do.

That was too much for Jensen. He ripped himself free and ran towards you, Jared and Misha following close behind. A shove from the side made Alex and you separate. Suddenly you were pulled back by two strong arms. As you looked behind, you saw Jared holding you close to him. As you focused your gaze back to Alex, you were shocked to see him in Jensen´s grasp. You did not quite understand what Jensen was saying but it did not sound good at all.

“Jensen, stop!” you wiggled yourself out of Jared´s arms and ran to save Alex. You tried pulling Jensen away but he was too strong. Even Alex could not free himself.

“IT WAS JUST ACTING!” your scream erupted which made Jensen stop in his tracks. Slowly, he let go of Alex who coughed a few times.

“What?!” the confusion was written all over Jensen´s face.

“Alex and I were just practicing for my audition next week. You know, the one with Tom Cruise? I told you about that.” your heart was racing, your breathing too fast. Jared and Misha were already at Alex´ side, making sure he was not hurt.

“Shit, I´m sorry. Alex, are you okay?”

“Yeah, yeah, all good.” he waved it off as if it was nothing. Typical Alex, you thought.

Suddenly you started laughing, replaying the scene in your head. Everyone looked at you weirdly but copied your actions soon after.

“Alex, he almost killed you.” by now tears were streaming down your face because you were laughing so hard.

“Hey, I didn´t even touch him.” Jensen complained.

“Oh yeah? Tell that my throat.” Alex stated sarcastically.

“That was acting?” Jared asked to which Alex and you only nodded.

“If you don´t get the job I´ll make sure to sue them, just so you know.” this time it was Misha who spoke up. This only made all of you laugh even more.

“Everyone back on set, please!” you could hear the director yell. Jared, Misha and you walked over, chatting and laughing about everything that just happened. Alex and Jensen, though, were a bit behind.

“Sorry again, kid. I really thought y´all were fighting. It sounded so real. You sure you´re okay?” he finished his sentence with a light chuckle, still somewhat ashamed of throwing himself at Alex like that.

“I´m fine, Jensen, really.” Alex laughed lightly. “Besides, now I know what happens if I ever hurt (Y/N) in any way.”

“You better take care of her and treat her like a princess. I´m serious.” Jensen had a stern look on his face but smiled anyway. You meant a lot to him and he could not bare the thought of anyone hurting you.

“I will. I promise.”

“Y´all coming or what?” you screamed at them from the other end of the set, waiting for the two of them so you could finally continue filming.

“On our way.” Alex said back, beginning to walk towards where you were standing. As he kept walking he thought about you again. How it was so easy for you to act out such a hard scene. Your talent amazed him. He really hoped you would land that role. From what he had seen so far, you were perfect for it. God, he loved you. It still had not sunken in that you were his. What did he ever do to deserve you? He knew he could not live without you and he would keep on reminding you of his love for you every single day.

Published (09/10/2020) by Cathy

Tags: @kalasyrtiaan, @blairrrose (thanks for your support <3)

[petersasteria]

I love the Disney songs idea sksksk I see the light (Tangled) w/Haz Love you 😘

Aww, thank you! Let’s just hope no one requests the same thing HAHAHA

I See The Light - Haz Osterfield (Soulmate AU)

"𝐀𝐥𝐥 𝐚𝐭 𝐨𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐢𝐬 𝐝𝐢𝐟𝐟𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐧𝐨𝐰 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐈 𝐬𝐞𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮."

Blur. It was all you saw. An array of colors would be in front of you and all you could see were distorted colors swirling around. Glasses didn’t help your situation or anyone’s situation for that matter. You cursed the ancestors who made the highest entity angry.

You see, it all began when a man named Fraudator cheated on his wife, Fidelis, with some woman he met while he was farming. The highest entity wasn’t very pleased with Fraudator’s action, so he punished Fraudator’s children until the next generations with blurry eyesight. The only time a person will be able to see clearly is when they touch their soulmate.

If your soulmate dies, the colors you’ll only see are black and white. It’s quite sad, really.

Your parents were one of the lucky ones who’ve met their soulmate at such a young age. You, however, were not so lucky. You’re already 23 and there was still no luck of meeting your truest love.

It was your mom’s birthday and your father decided it would be nice to go on a cruise for one week. You didn’t have anything to do, so you agreed. Your older sister was bringing her husband and her two kids and your little brother just went with the flow. After all, he was only thirteen. His whole mindset was “fuck soulmates!”. He didn’t care.

You arrived at the cruise and got settled in with the help of your parents. The food was delicious, the music was great, the people were kind and accommodating, and despite your blurry vision, you were having the time of your life. That’s why you needed to take a breather.

“Um, is it alright if I have some air outside?” You asked. You could see the blurry figure of your sister... or was it your mother? Anyway, either of them, turned to you and said, “Sure! I’ll take you.”

Upon hearing the voice, you realized it was your mother. You smiled and she helped you up from your seat and led you outside near the pool area.

“Do you want me to stay with you?” Your mom asked sweetly. You shook your head and held on to the railing, “No, thanks. It’s your birthday. Go have fun. I’ll just press the remote button when I’m ready to go.”

Everyone was given these little remote systems when they’re born. It only has one button and it’ll alert your parents’ phones whenever their blurry sighted child needed help.

“Alright.” Your mother kissed your cheek and left. You took a deep breath and faced the dark blurry scenery in front of you. Oh, how you wish you could meet your soulmate so that you could admire the view together. Unbeknownst to you and your soulmate, your wishes would come true that night.

You heard a group of boys laughing and walking towards your direction. They weren’t actually laughing at you. They were laughing at their blurry sighted friend who claimed that he could see everything without any help.

“Haz, come on! Don’t be silly.” Tom chuckled. “It’s okay if you need our help in guiding you everywhere.”

Harrison sighed, “I just don’t get it. All of you have met your soulmates-”

“Harry hasn’t met his soulmate yet. Hence, why he’s at home.” Sam interrupted.

“Fine. I’ll rephrase it.” Harrison rolled his eyes. “All of you, except for me and Harry, have met your soulmates early on and we haven’t met ours yet! It’s so annoyi-”

“HAZ, WATCH OUT!!” Tuwaine shouted, but it was too late. Harrison bumped into you causing you to fall on the floor with him falling on top of you.

“I’m so sor-” Harrison said, but he stopped mid-sentence when his blurry eyesight vanished. It was like magic! He looked at you and you also had a shocked look on your face.

“Haz, let’s go. Your position looks weird right now.” Tom said as he walked towards him. Sam stopped Tom and quietly said, “Don’t. Let Harrison have his moment, Tom. He just met his soulmate.”

“That’s his soulmate?” Tuwaine asked in disbelief.

Sam nodded, “Judging by their shocked faces and the fact that they’re looking at each other directly means that they were written in the stars for each other.”

Harrison got up and helped you. Both of you were still in shock and Harrison’s small group of friends were watching the scene in awe. Tuwaine was smiling, Tom was about to tear up, and Sam’s heart was practically soaring in pure bliss for his friend.

“I’m- I’m Harrison.” He said and offered you his hand. You looked down at it and lightly pushed it away. He slightly frowned, but it was replaced with the look of surprise once more when you pulled him in for a tight hug which he returned.

“I’m Y/N and I’m really glad that you’re here with me right now.” You said to him. You were going to cry and so was he.

“You just made my trip a million times better.” Harrison chuckled and pulled away.

Both of you looked at each other with bliss written all over your faces. After all those years spending your time with blurry vision, you could finally see everything clearly. More importantly, you finally found your soulmate and both of you knew that from that day onward, you didn’t want to spend the rest of your lives apart any longer.

"𝐒𝐭𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞, 𝐢𝐭'𝐬 𝐨𝐡, 𝐬𝐨 𝐜𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐫 𝐈'𝐦 𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐈'𝐦 𝐦𝐞𝐚𝐧𝐭 𝐭𝐨 𝐛𝐞."

"𝐈𝐟 𝐬𝐡𝐞'𝐬 𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞, 𝐢𝐭'𝐬 𝐜𝐫𝐲𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐥 𝐜𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐫; 𝐈'𝐦 𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐈'𝐦 𝐦𝐞𝐚𝐧𝐭 𝐭𝐨 𝐠𝐨."

* * * *

Fraudator is Latin for cheater. Fidelis is Latin for loyal or faithful.

𝐇𝐀𝐙 𝐎𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐅𝐈𝐄𝐋𝐃 𝐓𝐀𝐆𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓: @abrielleholland​ @silencetheslaves​ @imeanlifesabitshit​ @joyleenl​ @marshxx​​ @hjoficrecs​​ @blueleatherbag​ @poguesholland​​ @harryismysunflower​​ @justanothermarvelmaniac​ @lonikje​ @lizzyosterfield @itstaskeen​ @ilarbu​ @turtoix​ @badreputationlove​ @starlight-starks​ @swiftmind​ @sovereignparker​ @pearce14​

𝐆𝐄𝐍𝐄𝐑𝐀𝐋 𝐓𝐀𝐆𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓: @marvelousell​ @justasmisunderstoodasloki​ @rubberducky-jrr​ @petersholland​​ @osterfieldnholland​ @miraclesoflove​ @god-knows-what-am-i-doing​​ @perspectiveparker​​ @hollands-weasley @itstaskeen​ @call-me-baby-gir1​ @the-panwitch @iamaunicorn4704 @chloecreatesfictions​ @holland-styles​ @halfblood-princess-505​ @spidey-reids-2003​ @herbatkazmiloscia @whatthefuckimbisexual

[i-am-a-bad-influence-writes]

The Dutchess’ Garden - Part 4

Series Masterlist - Chris Evans Masterlist - Full Masterlist

Pairing: Chris Evans x OC Emma Meijers (typical Dutch girl. Blonde, blue eyes.)

Warnings: Explicit language, fluff, not really smut but kinda.

Word count: 1902

‘Okay, so come around 6:30? We can eat dinner together?‘ ‘Sure.‘

‘What are we watching,‘ Emma asks while shoveling another piece of pizza into her mouth. Chris doesn’t want to think it’s adorable, but it’s adorable. ‘Dammit, can you eat normally,‘ he laughs. She sees her eyes peek up, ready to say what has to be said. ‘I know, I know, language.‘ ‘That’s what I thought,‘ she says sternly, but he can see her smile just a second later. How did she manage to get him under het thumb this fast? And why doesn’t he mind at all? ‘Back to movies,‘ Chris says, ‘do you have any suggestions?‘ ‘I dunno. What are you up for? We can watch something funny like Not another teen movie, or something touching like Gifted, or something like Red sea diving resort, or-‘ ‘Are you going to name every single film I’ve ever done?‘ She huffs. ‘I didn’t even get to the Marvel movies,‘ she whines, ‘but yes. And as someone who thoroughly enjoyed Knives out I need to know if you still have your knit sweater from that movie. Because you won’t after I leave tonight.‘ ‘I do not own that sweater and even if I did, I wouldn’t tell you,‘ he smiles. She rolls her eyes in fake annoyance. ‘I’ll just take another one to hold hostage,‘ she says and walks over to him, grabbing his shirt by the hem, ‘like this one.‘ ‘You wouldn’t dare,‘ he says with a grin twitching on his lips. She steps a little closer to him. They’re only inches away from each other and Emma wants to pull him down and kiss him so bad, but she won’t. ‘You sure about that?‘ ‘I am fairly certain you wouldn’t be able to, even if you tried,‘ he leans down a little as a joke to tower over her, hoping to intimidate her a little. What he forgot is that Emma is a firecracker. She’s not easily intimidated. In fact, she steps closer so her chest is against his and she has to lean back to face him as he leaned over her. ‘I thought we agreed that I’m stronger,‘ she tries to say it seriously, but bursts into laughter and the moment is gone. She walks back to her seat. Chris tries to laugh along, but he feels a bit strange. Did that just really happen? Did she just do that? He wanted to kiss her, but she made a joke out of the situation. The mood was good, but she manipulated it to her will. ‘I’ll show you strong,‘ he says menacingly. She watches him with wide eyes as he walks over to the couch, grabs a blanket, and walks over to her. ‘Oh no,‘ she breathes out and jumps off her chair, ready to start running from him but she’s too slow. He’s already captured her in the blanket. He picks her up and throws her on the couch. Then, he flops down onto her. ‘I’m stronger.‘ ‘No, you’re just heavy,‘ she whines, ‘get off meeee~.‘ ‘Never.‘ ‘Okay, fine, you’re stronger,‘ she finally admits. Chris gets off her and she pulls her arm from under the blanket to show her crossed fingers. ‘Oh you little-‘ Before he can grap her she jumps over the back of the couch, racing through the house with Chris hot on her heels. Laughter fills the room until the third lap around the couch. She picks up a cushion and hits him with it. Not hard, but hard enough to surprise him. ‘Shit, did I hurt you,‘ she asks worried when he doesn’t move after she’s hit him. She drops the pillow and walks over to Chris, reaching for his face to check if he’s alright. He plays along, pretending to be hurt, but when she’s close enough he scoops her up again and pins her down on the couch, leaning over her body and holding her hands above her head. ‘You lost.‘ ‘Asshole,‘ she laughs. ‘Language,‘ he warns. ‘Dickhead,‘ she smirks. Chris puts both of her hands in one of his and starts ticking her, holding her down with his body. Her aggressive laughter and pleas fills the room. Dodger starts barking and runs over, pushing Chris’ leg. ‘Yeah, get him Dodger,‘ Emma tries to yell, but the dog doesn’t understand it through her laughing. Finally, Chris stops and Emma’s face falls into an angry frown. She crosses her arms, but he knows she’s just playing. ‘Okay, I’m sorry. You can pick the movie.‘

Chris has to admit he didn’t expect her to pick a movie that he didn’t star him. He was fully convinced she’d choose one that he played in to tease him back, but she didn’t. Instead she put on Coco and curled up against him. It was nothing like he expected. When the night got colder, she had coyly asked him if she could borrow a sweater anyway and Chris had said yes without thinking twice. Even after she told him he’d never get it back. He wrapped her arms around her to keep her warm and kissed the top of her head mindlessly when he heard her sniffles near the end of the movie. And suddenly the end of the night was there. Chris let her out after she insisted she could walk herself home. He didn’t want to let her walk alone, but knew he’d only strain their relationship if he forced himself on her. He finds himself back on the couch with Dodger’s head on his lap, trying to explain his feelings to the animal even though it won’t understand a word he’s staying. He looks nothing less than confused. Just a few minutes later, the doorbell rings. Dodger runs over to the door and starts wagging his tail like crazy. For a second, Chris wants to ignore it but Dodger doesn’t look that excited for just anyone. He peels himself off the couch and walks over to open the door. Without really paying attention, he pulls open the door to see a very sleepy Emma with her arms wrapped around herself, holding the sweater towards Chris. ‘I forgot to actually give it back,‘ she laughs, ‘and if I don’t do it now, I’ll probably forget.‘ ‘Please put it back on, you look like you’re freezing,‘ he begs her, pushing the sweater back to her. ‘I don’t want to.‘ ‘Listen, you were bugging me about the Knives out sweater earlier. This one looks like it, just keep it,‘ he tells her, not understanding why she has to be so stubborn about a damn sweater. ‘But if I keep it, it won’t smell like you anymore.‘ Her eyes widen when she realizes what she just said. ‘Oh no,‘ she whispers. Chris takes a step closer to her, taking his sweater from her and wrapping it around her shoulders. ‘You like the way I smell?‘ His lips play an amused smile as he watches Emma go into full panic mode. She takes a step away from him. ‘Ehm, I gotta go. I have a lot to do tomorrow. By the way, I won’t make it to our run tomo-‘ Chris grabs her arm, pulls her back in and gently presses his lips on hers. The kiss isn’t wild or deep, but just their lips together feels like electricity running through. Their lips part and Emma’s eyes go wide again. A blush is pulling up on her cheeks as Chris admires her with a small smile. ‘I like the way you smell too,‘ he admits. ‘I’m sorry, I have to get my head straight,‘ Emma tells him, handing him his sweater and almost running away, leaving Chris feeling confused. Did he read her feelings wrong? Was it all purely platonic?

It has almost been a week. A week since the kiss, a week since Emma disappeared and The Dutchess closed. Robert called Chris for to meet somewhere because he knows it has something to do with him. It has to. Those two were basically eye fucking each other the first time they met. They ended up in Chris’ garden to keep it private. ‘Why do I get the feeling all of this has something to do with you?‘ Robert stares Chris down, not a bit of niceness in his voice. He sounds nasty, like he’ll do something to Chris and he will. If he hurt her, that is. Emma is like family to him and he’ll treat her as such. If Chris took advantage of her, he’ll make it right. ‘I didn’t do anything,‘ Chris argues, ‘I don’t know what’s going on.‘ The two stare at each other for what feels like forever. Then Chris’ phone goes off. ‘Yes?‘ “Hey Chris, it’s Tom. Listen, I just met up with Emma and she asked if you and Robert were coming to the party Monday since she hadn’t heard from either of you.“ ‘You met up with Emma? Where is she?‘ “Well, she just took a plane back to the Netherlands. She’s been visiting family in Europe.“ Chris looks up at Robert. ‘Visiting family in Europe you say? Listen, I’m here with Robert. I’ll put you on speaker.‘ “Hi mister Downey. Emma said that you’d know about the party. She said it’s an annual thing and she felt sad that she hadn’t heard anything from either of you. She thought you would’ve seen the post by now.“ ‘The post,‘ Robert asks. “Yeah, the Instagram post on the private page of The Dutchess.“ Robert pulls out his phone and goes to the page. This is the first time Chris hears anything about a page. ‘What’s this page you’re on about?‘ ‘Don’t bother asking him,‘ Robert snaps, ‘it’s a private Instagram page that keeps members of The Dutchess updated. A better question is how you got into that page Tom.‘ “Oh, I’m a member of The Queen’s Garden. It’s the British version in England. They’re all owned by the same family.“ ‘Well that’s new,‘ Robert mumbles and shows Chris his phone, ‘let Emma know we’ll call her to confirm we’re going.‘ “I can’t tell her. She already left. I think you’re better off just calling The Dutchess or calling her dad. She told me you have his number.“ ‘Okay, thanks Tom.‘ “No problem. Have fun at the party.“ Chris stares Robert down, waiting for an apology he’s never going to get. ‘I forgot about that,‘ Robert admits, which is as much as an apology as Chris is going to get. ‘But there is something going on between you two. I’m certain of it. You wouldn’t be the first one to fall for her.‘ ‘What do you mean?‘ ‘She’s charming and beautiful. There has been more than one occasion where her father blacklisted a member because he was making moves on Emma.‘ ‘I-I’m sorry?‘ Robert sighs. ‘To name a few, Tom Cruise, Channing Tatum, Hernry Cavill got close to being blacklisted,‘ Robert sums up. ‘You’re forgetting about Hiddleston,‘ a voice calls. The two of them turn around to see Emma walking towards them, Dodger already circling her feet. ‘Emma, you’re back,‘ Robert says quite unbothered. ‘Hi, welcome back,‘ Chris says, opening his arms for a hug which she happily walks into. She presses a kiss to Robert’s cheek and sits down with the two. ‘As I said, you’re forgetting about that time with Tom Hiddleston,‘ she says, ‘my father almost blacklisted him because our way of friendship is flirting. He has no interest in me whatsoever. I’m not his type.‘ She says the last thing while looking at Chris. ‘He prefers my niece.‘ ‘I thought you’d be home Monday,‘ Robert says. She looks at him with a smile. ‘I was supposed to be home Monday, but I realized I left someone hanging at home,‘ she explains, ‘so Chris, can I take you out sometime? Preferably tonight at seven?‘

[dontshootmespence]

Crossing the Threshold

Summary: You and your best friend Dean have always just been friends, best friends, but one night with the bunker to yourselves you decide to get a little silly...which leads to a little fun.

Pairing: Dean x Reader

Word Count: 1,660

Warnings: Nipple piercings, nipple play, vaginal sex, oral sex (male receiving).

A/N: For those of you 18 and over! This fulfills my “piercings” square for @spnkinkbingo, my friends to lovers square for @spnfluffbingo2019 and my prompt for @heycasbutt‘s 600 follower challenge. Prompt is bold!

“Headed out!”

You heard him scream from the bedroom and yelled back. “Have fun, Sam! Not too much fun!”

“Yea, don’t do anything I wouldn’t do!” Dean bellowed, his voice following the wafting smell of bacon coming from the kitchen. 

“Don’t listen to him! He’d do anything!”

You expected to hear something from Sam before he left, but you got nothing. Undoubtedly, he was already out the door. He was about to go on his first date in forever and although he didn’t want to get his hopes up you could tell he was excited for some degree of normalcy. 

Turning the machine back on, you continued your back and forth movements, watching the floors go from a dull, dirt-covered gray back to the shine it had when the boys first found out the bunker even existed. Neither of them would ever think to clean the floors, but having something that felt even a little bit like home - clean, cool, comforting - was something that didn’t go unnoticed by the two men you loved more than anyone else in the world. 

They’d found you in a bar drowning in a bottle of whiskey with no one left to keep you anchored to the world, but they’d saved your life and taken you in and you couldn’t imagine your life without them.

Maybe 10 minutes or so after Sam left, the scent of bacon became too much. You turned off the machine and admired your handiwork.

“Bacon and eggs are ready!” Dean screamed from the other end of the bunker.

“About damn time! I’m fucking hungry.”

As you walked into the kitchen, Dean sauntered over to the table with the pan in hand and a towel slung over his shoulder. “Perfection takes time.”

“It’s bacon and eggs.”

“Perfect bacon and eggs.” He placed some on your plate and the rest on his. “What have you been doing this whole time?”

“Cleaning.”

“Why?”

“Doesn’t it feel more like home when the place is clean? Instead of an actual bomb shelter?”

“Yea.”

“That’s why. Speaking of, I waxed the floors, get your fluffy socks!”

“Why?” Dean asked, genuinely confused before it finally clicked. “Wait, smooth floors, are we going to pull a Risky Business?”

You grinned widely and stuffed the rest of your dinner into your face so you could go and grab some socks, the iPod and docking system and a new shirt. This one was grungy as fuck after an entire day’s worth of cleaning. 

Running back toward your room, you realized that amidst all the cleaning you’d forgotten to do your own laundry. Instead of sweating it, you ran into Dean’s room and grabbed a band tee he hadn’t worn in forever, figuring he wouldn’t mind you wearing it. Between his shirt, crappy, worn shorts and white socks you were really rocking some sex appeal tonight. 

After grabbing the iPod dock and your iPod, you slid your way back into the kitchen and turned on Old Time Rock and Roll, singing into your invisible microphone while you waited for Dean. “You’re wearing my shirt.”

You spun around and looked down. “Yea, you never wear this one and with all the cleaning I forgot my own laundry, so I grabbed this. Didn’t think you would mind.”

“I don’t,” he said, swallowing the lump in his throat as he looked you up and down. If you didn’t know any better, you would’ve said he was checking you out, but it had been years and nothing happened, so you chalked it up to wishful thinking and demanded he rock out and slide along the newly waxed floors with you. 

“Slide, fucker!”

With a snort, Dean pulled his sunglasses down began a spot on imitation of Tom Cruise. If you had to venture a guess, he’d done this before, or at least thought of it. It was rare that he allowed himself to really relax, even more so than you or Sam, but seeing him so genuinely happy was worth all the effort you’d put into cleaning.

The second the song went off Dean put it on repeat and you started all over again. With renewed vigor, you slid down the hallway toward your room, losing your footing over a particularly slippery patch of floor and slamming into the door frame. “Ow fuck!”

“You slipped?”

“No, I decided to take a nap on the floor.”

“Don’t be such a smartass,” he said, holding his hand out to help you up. “You okay?”

“Yea, I just hit my boob. My piercings are gonna kill in the morning.”

Dean went startlingly silent. “As in nipple piercings?”

“Yea, I’ve always wanted them and our lives are never certain so I figured fuck it. About a year ago,” you continued, knowing he was going to ask when you’d gotten them.

You grabbed yourself, massaging the pain away, before realizing that Dean hadn’t said anything. “You alright?” 

“You’re wearing my shirt, you look incredible and I have the image of your pierced nipples in my mind, I-I need a minute.”

Maybe you hadn’t been seeing things earlier. “You...have the hots for me?”

“Have you seen you?”

Blushing, you replied, “I look like a hot mess. I’m in baggy ass clothes.”

“And you look hot. And you’re you. Who wouldn’t want you?”

For a moment, you pondered whether or not to really cross that line with him. “Do you want me, Dean?”

Silence filled the bunker, only Dean’s shallow breathing and your own blood pounding through your ears before he backed you into the wall and lifted you up by your upper thighs. He hesitated a moment, giving you another chance to put an end to this, but you didn’t want to. 

He grasped your chin and brought your mouth down to his, opening your lips with his tongue as his hand slipped up your shirt. As his finger grazed your nipple you gasped. Ever since you’d gotten them you’d been even more sensitive. “Play with them,” you whispered into his mouth.

Dean groaned at the command and grabbed the hem of the shirt, pulling it up and over your head in one smooth maneuver. “Ever orgasmed from nipple play before?”

“Nope.”

A devilish grin spread across his face, his eyes alight with his newfound mission. “Let’s change that.”

He dipped his head to your breast, tentatively licking at the piercing as his other  hand played with the nipple that needed attention. You’d played with your piercings before but had never reached that pinnacle moment. Something told you that the addition of another person was going to complete the equation. The warmth of his tongue enveloped your nipple, sliding over the piercing before he bite down gently, sending an electric shock to your pussy. 

As his tongue washed over your right side, he pinched your left between his thumb and forefinger and relished in the way you bucked your hips against his denim-clad cock. “Needy much?”

“You have no idea, Dean,” you breathed. You hadn’t had sex in so long it was astounding you hadn’t exploded. He quickly dipped his head to your wanting nipple and pursed his lips around it, sucking gently, sending small waves of pleasure emanating outward. “Fuck, please. Please make me cum.” In desperation, you reached down between you to touch yourself but Dean grabbed your wrist and pinned it to the wall. “No.” 

Hungrily, he continued his ministrations, lapping each nipple with attention, bringing you closer and closer to the brink before he’d move away and leaving you wanting. You grabbed his face and begged for the teasing to end. “Look at me,” he demanded.

When you looked at him, he grasped both your nipples between his thumbs and forefingers, pulling, pinching and twisting with practiced precision until you were shaking against him, your orgasm quiet, but powerful and different from anything you’d ever felt. “Fuck, oh my God.”

You felt like jelly as you unwrapped your legs from around his waist and slipped to the floor, grasping his belt and ripping it from its loops. “I need to fuck you.” You heard from above, voice breathy. 

“And I need your cock in my mouth.”

Dean grunted against the need to burst right then and there. “I can’t tell you how many times I’ve imagined this.”

“Well, you’ll have to let me know how the reality compares to your imagination.” You pulled his jeans and boxers down together, watching with rapt attention as his cock sprung thick and heavy from its confinements. With a flattened tongue, you ran yourself up the length of him and kissed the tip, moaning at the salty pre-come that had gathered there. 

Dean chanced a glance at you, swallowing hard. “If you continue looking at me like that I’m going to have a hard time controlling myself.”

“I don’t want you to control yourself,” you replied, wrapping your lips around his tip and massaging the front of the head with your tongue before pulling off with a satisfied pop. “I want you to let go.”

As you slide him in and out of your mouth, your hands followed, flattening against his pelvis while you took him nearly three quarters of the way. When you cupped his balls in your hand, he grabbed your head and stilled it, gently thrusting himself down your throat. “My god, Y/N. Your mouth is like silk.”

You popped off his cock, keeping your eyes glued to his as you cleaned the drool off your chin with your finger. “How about my throat?” Before he could answer or look away, you deep-throated his cock and mumbled in approval around him as he came - long, thick spurts hitting your tongue while he struggled to stand. 

Standing up, you kissed him deeply, fisting his cock in your hand as you backed up toward his room. Crossing the threshold, he pushed you back toward the bed, eyes dark and determined. “I’m never going to get enough of you.”

[alitheamateur]

The Grind-Chapter 15

He escorted me through the tinted glass doors into the predicted booming music filled bar room, people packed from wall to wall, over to a tall tabletop nestled in the corner. Very gentlemanly, he pulled out the empty chair to offer my seat.

“Alright, Liv Elliott, can I get you a drink? What’s your poison?”

“Thanks, uh, I’ll just have a beer, please.” I answered, quivering with slight nerves. He maneuvered his way through the crowd headed in the direction of the bartender, while I waited fretfully alone with my thoughts. He seemed to be nice enough, and clearly easy on the eyes, so much so that my agonizingly neglected sex life was taxing me towards the direction of just sleeping with the man tonight for the hopeful intent of an orgasm.  But, he wasn’t my Colton. My emotionally confused, tormented, asshole Colton.

Snap out of it, woman. The guy dumped you. Very cruelly so. MOVE ON.

Drinks in tow, Luke two-stepped and squeezed through the crowd, making his way back to me.

“A beer for the lady,” he served with a wink. But it wasn’t the same wink that so long ago made me weak. It wasn’t like.. don’t say it, you pathetic fool. “You look stunning in the neon lights, you know?”

Dear God, please be joking with that line, man. He let loose a smothered laugh. Sweet relief. He wasn’t serious.

“Thanks, I think?” I accepted the cheesy, sarcastic compliment. “Tia mentioned you were a personal trainer. That must keep you pretty busy.”

“I do my fair share of push-ups, I guess, yeah. But I enjoy it, honestly. Especially when my clients see the results their looking for. It’ all worth it then, ya’ know?” Okay Luke, so you’re kind, and not a total airheaded muscle bag. Noted.

“Yeah, I’m sure the downtown housewives have a fit over you, huh?” I winked. “Ha ha ha, very funny. I’ll have you know I have several house dads on my clientele list as well, thank you.” He chimed matter of factly. “But, enough of me for now. I need to hear all about the glamourous, successful, posh life of the rising journalist, Liv Elliott.”

Wow. What load of shit had Tia been feeding this poor fellow? “Not much to know, sadly. I’m a bit of a workaholic these days. I was recently promoted at the newspaper I work for, which has definitely added to my work load.” I tapped my index finger on the dampened bar napkin beneath my sweating brown bottle. It did sound a bit tragic when I heard myself say it aloud. I was a soon to be 23 year old single woman, living in a bumbling metropolis, no children, no heavy responsibility other than a steady job which most of the time felt more like a paying hobby than an actual career, and I spent the vast majority of my life tucked away at my desk, or in my lonesome apartment with my nose tucked into my computer. Aside from the occurrences when Tia would suggest dinner, or the occasional appearance at a newly opened nightclub, which I was strangely enough beginning to enjoy a bit.

“Nothing wrong with dedication in my book! I admire that you take what you do seriously. And the fact that you’re a complete knockout just adds to the allure.” Luke said with eyes zeroed into my own.  Swallowing the last swig of my drink, a pang of guilt flinched in my belly. I was genuinely enjoying the banter of small talk the evening had consisted of thus far, but the feelings didn’t go much deeper than that. Not to say necessarily I wanted to be there with Colton instead, because every ounce of remaining conscience within me advised otherwise. I felt it wasn’t wise to be out without anyone yet, considering the state I was in. After returning from the short visit back to Indiana, sure my emotional state was frequenting more on the border of happiness, and almost contentment rather than the doom & gloom of before. But, I was far, far from ready to dive into the dating pool again. The proven dangerous, unruly, painful dating pool. My heart not quite nursed back to it’s original state, and ready to open up to the next Pittsburgh man. Regardless of how purely genuine and handsome that man may be. Luke didn’t deserve to be trampled on, and strung about by an unstable mess of a woman living in a never-ending state of confusion.

“Oh gosh, Luke. Thank you, really.” I tucked a curled strand of hair behind my reddening ear. “Can I be super honest with you right now? At the risk of sounding like a total heartless wench…”

His look narrowed behind stringy eyelashes, and he leaned in. “Uh, sure? Yeah. Shoot.”

Flashes of  what I imagined would’ve likely been a stable, routine, safe and steady relationship with the confused man across from me sparked through my thoughts. All the attributes any sane woman would hunt out in a partner, yet all the things to me that seemed, dull and tedious.

“You have been nothing short of a total charmer since our introduction tonight. And I-” I began before Luke interjected with a cautious smile, and knowing nod.

“Ohhhh, I think I know where this is headed.”

“Any woman, I mean literally any woman, including my clearly stupid self, would be lucky to be in your company. Which is why, I couldn’t look at myself in the mirror again if I carried this far enough to let you get hurt.” My saliva thick with nerves and what I hoped wasn’t regret as I let my date down as easily, and earnestly as I knew how. “You have no idea how bad I sincerely wish I could slap the ignorant decision I’m about to make right out of me… But, I’m just not ready, ya’ know? I’m kind of a pile of wreckage at the moment, and you don’t deserve to have to glue it all back together.”

He bobbed his head lazily and relaxed back into his chair. “As much as I don’t like it, I understand it. Tia kinda informed me that you were still reeling a little from your last relationship. But, since you were honest, can I be the same with you?” He asked politely.

“God, of course. Please!”

He pursed his mouth seriously before beginning. “The loser who did whatever he did to screw you over so badly, is a mindless asshole, who is apparently blind as well. I’ve spent all of a couple hours with you Liv, and even I can see what kind of woman you are. So, don’t sell yourself short, okay? Whether you give him another chance, or someone else who comes along, make sure he deserves you. And hell, by the way Tia talked you up, she might make her own play at you before it’s over.” I laughed at his response, especially his dig at my proud bi-sexual friend, who never hesitated to playfully suggest I take a walk with her on the other side of the sexuality fence.

As the conversation came to a close, Luke took my hand into his, and ushered me kindly to my car outside. I kissed him tenderly on the cheek before he reached down to open the handle of my door.

“If you think it’ll keep Tia off your back, I could always tell her our night ended at your place with hours of relentless love making, if you want.” I puckered my mouth in sincere contemplation of his suggested lie, but considered it be best for both our reputations if we kept it honest.

“As tempting as that little strategy of yours sounds, I think I better just suck it up and take the scolding from her. But thanks for lookin’ out for me.” A thoughtful smile slid onto his lips as he closed to door after I slid into the seat, before he jogged carefully across the crosswalk.

 Following my date with Luke the night before, Tia had texted begging to meet up for brunch at a place closely located between the center of our apartments. I groaned at the backlash I’d no doubt have to suffer at her hand after I spilled the details of how things had played out with her set up. She’d arrived at the restaurant before me, and was seated at an umbrella covered, mosaic table on the front patio, already sipping leisurely on a mimosa. When she saw me approaching, she raised her hands to a cheerful clap, obvious that she hadn’t spoken to Luke yet. Or maybe, talking to Luke was exactly why she was so unreserved with her merriment towards me. Had he decided to go ahead with his salacious fictional story about what had happened a few hours ago between us?

“I ordered you a drink. Now sit, and spill, LC!” She’d decided that would be her given name for me, given my middle name was Caroline.

“Hello to you, Miss Nosey. Whatever happened to not kissing and telling?” I was giving it my all to avoid crashing her excitement.

“Don’t you dare! I need to hear everything!” She gasped with an exasperated eye roll.

When the waitress came back to our table, delivering my fluted glass and jotting down our order, I was thankful for the 3 extra minutes I had that allowed to me to escape her insistent questioning.

“Alright, but when I start talking, you have to swear you won’t interrupt. Just let me say my piece, okay?” I arched a pinky at her in expecting hers to return in a swear.

“I already don’t like what I’m hearing, ma’am….” She sighed between sips.

“He’s like, beautiful. Like Tom Cruise in Top Gun kind of beautiful. And he was so damn polite, Tia.  The perfect gentleman. But, not in a stuffy way, ya’ know?”

“Yes, Liv. I do know. Which is exactly why I wanted you to go out with him to begin with. Go on…” She cocked an obvious displeased brow at me.

“And trust me 100% when I tell you that after I spent some time with him, I really, really tried, Tia. I wanted something to spark, I wanted to feel that little flutter in my belly around him,” I stressed in a contrite tone. “And I know if it had been any other normal, remotely rational female, that it would’ve happened that way…” Before I finished my plea, I downed the hefty remains of my mimosa hoping for an extra ounce of liquid courage. “I’m just n… not ready, I don’t think. I mean, I feel a million pounds lighter than I did 6 months ago, definitely. But, I don’t feel quite ready to move forward with dating anyone just yet.” I ended my thought, hoping there was a sliver of her that would understand where I was coming from. “Do you hate me?”

She huffed dramatically. “Oh fuck, Liv. Stop it! You  know I don’t hate you. Its your life, and I’d never encourage you to do something you don’t feel up to. And, just because I know you’re driving yourself crazy with it, I just want you to know its okay to still love him. Colton, I mean.” I halted any movement as her words registered to me. Breathing included. “I know you despise him for what he did, and rightfully so. The shithead deserves it. But, it’s okay to love him, too. Don’t beat yourself up over that. Love is this stupid, weird, jolting roller-coaster that makes no sense. And whoever you strap into that seat with, whether it be Luke, or Colton, or some rando you haven’t even met yet, it’ll be right. You’re smart, LC. Trust yourself. And if you happen to strap in with someone who turns out to be a vicious psychopath, then I’ll be in the seat right behind you to throw the dude over the side, alright?”

The girl was a God send. I was so unbelievably thankful for my dangerously loyal friend. Something that now made my life somewhat whole. Almost as whole as the veggie omelet I inhaled, after a side order of cheese grits, of course.

“You’re the best. Like, the best of the best, you know that?” I complemented.

She shrugged daftly, smearing cream cheese heavily over her blueberry bagel. “You don’t deserve me, Elliott. What are your plans today?”

I hadn’t thought much about an agenda for today past the brunch with Tia, but I’m sure it’d consist of something along the lines of a yoga session in the living room, maybe a little research for the next match I had to cover, and lastly spending way too much time pruning in a bubble bath.

“Nothing as of yet. Where are you headed? Work today?” I supposed.

“No, I actually have the day off so I’m gonna head over to the Temple for an extra workout.” Tia was referring to Temple Fitness, the gym close by where she was a member.

“Do you have anything coming up? Like, fights, I mean?” She was still striving to get her feet wet in the world of fighting, so competitors weren’t exactly banging her door down with opportunities.

“Not yet, damn it. But my trainer keeps me in shape at all times, just in case something comes along,” she informed me.

Then, a strange glimmer lit inside her blue irises. “As a matter of fact, why don’t you come down with me? When’s the last time you put a workout in, you delicate little pansy?”

As much as I didn’t appreciate her brutal sarcasm, she was actually right. Not to discredit the wonders of hot yoga, but I hadn’t actually had my heart rate elevated in, well, nearly a year. With Colt out of the picture, I’d lost my running partner. Who was also my bedroom partner, which had been my definite first choice in the cardio department.

“Hey, I resent that remark, thank you very much! No matter how accurate it may be. I’d just be in the way though, Tia. You’re training, and I’d just be, standing around.” I laughed off her suggestion.

“There’s plenty of equipment, you bimbo. Ellipticals, treadmills, a pool. Plenty of things to keep you busy, and get your saggy little tush in shape,” Tia winked. “Or, the fancy MMA columnist could maybe do a little training herself to see what a day in the life of her subject is really like.”

I was instantly intrigued at the bold proposal. I’d gotten to sit the sidelines on everything Colton underwent in the days leading up to his match, but nothing remotely close to suffering it firsthand. We’d learned in school that there was no better way to “know” than to “do.”  I would truly have the insiders point of view if I dabbled around with all that entailed in the life of a mixed martial artist, along with that added bonus of gaining what I very much lacked in muscle mass. Not to mention, the education of a bit of self-defense, which wasn’t a bad idea now that I no longer had my own personal body guard to escort me through the ruthless streets of the city. Damn, Tia and her endless ideas that sent my boxed zone of comfort crumbing around me.

“God, I can’t believe I’m agreeing to this. Is there anything you can’t talk me into? Like, it’s getting ridiculous. Stop forcing me to be all, spontaneous and what not.” I spat sarcastically at her.

“Well, I haven’t talked you into bed yet, my oh easily persuaded friend. I’ve spared you,” Tia gawked foolishly across the table. I can only imagine the pink cloud of mortification overcasting my gaping jaw.

What crazy plan had she wrangled me into? My hesitant agreeance already a hard to swallow regret. But, she couldn’t drag me into too much trouble with just a bit of exercise, right?

tags: @torialeysha @eap1935 

[bluesfortheredj]

May I please request a Taron fic please? In an interview he said that he did not know much about cocktails and ordered a long island iced tea so that had me thinking, what if he went out with the reader, ordered the 'iced tea' and got drunk. Can't walk straight, slurring, giggling type drunk. The reader then takes care of him throughout the night ('I'm hungry', the reader throws him a sandwich etc) In the morning he feels bad so he tries to repay her but she refuses until one day... [up to u]

“Which one then?” you ask as you stand with your arm linked in Taron’s, both of you looking at the two choices of places to eat in front of you. One was an Italian restaurant, and the other was more of a bar that did nibbles instead of proper food, so obviously Taron was set on that.

“That one,” he says, nodding towards the bar and starting to walk before you could give an opinion.

“So, tonight’s about drinking instead of eating?” you chuckle.

“Well, not exactly, but it’ll help.”

“Why? Because you can’t stand my company any more?”

“You know I didn’t mean it that way!” he says, nudging his arm into your side.

“Whatever. Let’s go drink.”

You both walk in and order some chips to share, then you decide on a malibu and coke while he goes for the ‘steady’ option of a long island ice tea. You frown at him in confusion at his choice of words for that drink, but you shrug it off, assuming that he must know what’s in it if he’s ordering it.

“Come on then, what’s been going on with you recently?” he asks.

“Well, me and Mike broke up a couple of weeks ago, job’s going pretty good though-”

“What? Why didn’t you tell me?!” Taron interrupts, now leaning in to you across the table for you to tell him what happened.

“Could’ve sworn I text you. Maybe not though, it was all a bit of a blur. Although the image of him and that girl on our sofa is, funnily enough, clear as day still...”

“Seriously?! He fucking cheated on you? (Y/N), seriously, you should’ve called me.”

“Oh, come on, the last thing you wanted to hear when you were being all badass as Robin Hood was my sob story,” you laugh. The drinks arrive and you down yours easily, ordering another almost straight away while Taron looks on at your with concern.

“Don’t look at me like that, Taron,” you say, rolling your eyes, “I’m fine. Weren’t meant to be, obviously.”

“(Y/N), I’m so sorry I wasn’t there for you. I wouldn’t have minded if you called. Then I could’ve flown back to smack him earlier,” he smirks.

“Oh, don’t worry, he got a huge slap round the face when he came back the next day to try and ‘fix things’ as he put it.”

“Good girl!” Taron winks, already finishing up his drink and getting another, “so, what now then? Any dates?”

“Hell no. Enjoying my own company thank you very much,” you say defiantly, downing the last of your second drink.

The conversation continues, the chips get eaten, and Taron keeps on ordering his long island iced teas, still blissfully unaware at how much alcohol was actually in them. You watch as he gets a little giggly, and his cheeks turn a rosy red as the drink goes straight to his head, the chips doing nothing to soak any of it up. He tells you stories about being on set, but you’re not entirely sure what’s true or not as he keeps winking and laughing mid sentence, as if it was a private joke, with only him knowing the answer.

“And then… and then my trousers went… POOF!” he slurs, barely getting out the last word through fits of laughter. He waves his hands around and covers his crotch to show what he had to do when it happened, then slips off his stool and grabs on to the table to steady himself.

“Alright you, I think it’s time to go home,” you chuckle, and slowly get off your seat to help him.

“Don’t tell anyone,” he whispers loudly, “but I need to pee real bad.”

“Can you hold it until we get home?”

“I think so.”

“Excellent, because I am not coming in the gents to help you.”

“Shhh!” he laughs, “if you came in the gents with me I wouldn’t be able to resist…”

“Okay! Enough of that now, come on,” you say, getting a hold of his arm and helping him to the door. You hail a taxi and get in for the short ten minute drive to Taron’s place, then pull him out of the vehicle, pay the driver, and watch as he walks in a wobbly line to the door. He fumbles with his keys, missing the lock every time, and you have to take them off of him to unlock it for him, and he stumbles in the door, kicking his shoes off messily.

“Need to pee. Wanna help?” he asks, wiggling his eyebrows.

“Absolutely not, but thanks for the offer,” you reply, picking his shoes up and placing them neatly together along with yours.

“I could make you forget all about Mike, y’know!” he slurs as he holds on to the wall to help him walk towards the toilet. You roll your eyes and laugh to yourself at the giggly, flirty Taron that you’d missed so much. He soon comes back without any trousers on, just his shirt and boxers, then slides across the wooden floor as if he were Tom Cruise.

“Missed me?” he asks with a grin.

“So much,” you reply, raising an eyebrow at him, “I think you should sleep this off.”

“Yessss!” he exclaims, “come to bed with me.”

He grabs your hand and you follow him to his bedroom where he then trips on to his bed with a bounce, and leans up on his elbow, looking at you with what you could only assume was meant to be a seductive look, but ending up more sleepy looking.

“Am I making you wet?” he asks, gesturing to himself.

“Unfortunately not, darling. Is there anything you want?”

“You.”

“Apart from me?”

“A sandwich would be good. Tuna mayoooo,” he sings.

“Coming right up,” you laugh, exiting the room. You root around in his fridge and cupboard, then put together a sandwich for him to take back up to his room where he’s sitting up against the headboard with his shirt off now.

“Oh, bloody hell,” you say, shielding your eyes, “you could have warned me.”

“Nothing you haven’t seen before! And don’t pretend you don’t love it,” he giggles. You lower your hand and sit on the edge of his bed, handing him the plate roughly.

“Shut up and eat,” you sigh.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to-” he starts, his mouth full of bread and tuna.

“Don’t talk while you’re eating. Manners, Egerton, manners!”

He finishes up the sandwich quickly, then you take the plate downstairs and get him a glass of water, going back up to place it on his bedside table. You find him still sat up, but his head flopped to one side after drifting off, and you cover him over with his duvet. You make your way to the spare bedroom and settle in for the night, only waking when you hear footsteps outside the door the next morning. There’s a soft tap, then Taron opens the door to see if you’re awake, and his eyes light up to see that you are.

“Morning,” he whispers, entering the room, “about last night… I’m so sorry.”

“Sorry for what, exactly?” you ask with a smirk, now sitting up in bed.

“Umm, everything? I can’t really remember what happened.”

“Oh, you know, the usual. Flirting outrageously with me, asking me to help you in the bathroom, offering yourself to me.”

“Shit,” he whispers, “I’m sorry! Let me make it up to you.”

“Don’t worry, honestly. I’d better be getting home anyway.”

“No, don’t go, please.”

“I’ve got to,” you smile weakly, “I’ll be out in a bit.”

Taron leaves you to get ready, then you make your way out to collect your bag and leave, him sitting in the kitchen in his boxers with a sad look on his face.

“Oh, cheer up!” you laugh, “I’ll see you soon, yeah?”

“Please let me make this up to you. I’m so sorry (Y/N).”

“I’m alright. Don’t worry about it,” you smile, then leave in silence.

-

A couple of weeks later after chatting to Taron every other day on the phone, and him constantly asking whether he can make it up to you yet after his drunken antics that night, you finally send him a text asking him to come over.

“Hey, what’s up?” he asks as you open the front door to let him in.

“I just need some company tonight, if that’s okay. You technically owe me one,” you chuckle half heartedly.

“Of course. Are you alright?”

“Fine,” you whisper, your voice almost breaking as you lie.

“You’re not, but I won’t push it-”

“Mike was at the same cafe I was earlier and he was with his girlfriend, and I guess maybe it was ‘out of sight, out of mind’, but this sucks. This completely and utterly sucks, and I feel like shit, and that girl he cheated on me with is his girlfriend and why can’t anything good happen to me?” you ramble, tears falling down your cheeks rapidly. Taron’s face falls at the sight of you breaking apart, and in some kind of attempt at trying to piece you back together, he kisses you.

“Sorry,” he gasps, pulling away from you, “I’m so sorry. This is the last thing you need.”

“Maybe it’s exactly what I need,” you whisper, pressing your lips to his again briefly, “stay with me.”

“Of course,” he smiles.

[damianholstad]

all the damn symbols from blakey xD

✚  /  a song that reminds my muse of your muse  —  3005 by childish gambino. 

no, this isn’t the case of “ this song played when we chatted that one time. ” it’s far more gay than that. it’s the classic case of a boy, with itsy bitsy heart eyes at this stupid blonde bitch, and a song which he listens to on the daily and has begun to associate with her ‘cos ~uwu relatability~ like i said, it’s SUPER GAY and he won’t ever tell her. thanks.

“  —  no matter what you say or what you do … when I'm alone, i’d rather be with you.

✪  /  a song that represents our muses together  —  rumours by gnash.

their whole schtick is that people talk  –  and we shan’t trust gossip! that’s what to take from this, bailey … this song is self-explanatory, don’t make me over-explain it )-: 

“  –  so tell me the lies they told you first, ‘cause that shit ain’t nothing new. 

❤  /  a song that represents my muses feelings toward your muse  —  sit next to me by foster the people. 

[ me vc ] he has a thing for blondes! on the real, though – we already know she’s cute and he’s horny … can i make it any more obvious? 

“  –  last time i saw you said “what’s up?” and pushed right through. then i tried to catch you but we’re always on the move.

⚯  /  a song my muse would sing to your muse  —  you’ve lost that lovin’ feelin’ by the righteous brothers.

do you remember … weeks ago when parallels were drawn between maeve and jackson from sex education? well, let’s draw them again  –  ‘cos he WOULD stand on a table, get jazz band to back his nerd ass up, and he’d belt one out. and then he’d get rejected. HOWEVER, as bopping as jackson’s choice of song is, that’s not damian’s. his is from the hit film Top Gun (1986) ‘cos he’s an established tom cruise stan. remember when he dressed up as his role in top gun for halloween 2 years ago? anyways. click the link, coward. 

“  –  it makes me just feel like crying. 'cause baby, something beautiful's dyin'.

♡  /  a song my muse thinks your muse would like  —  nikes by frank ocean. 

he just likes the song, okay … there’s no deeper meaning here! so, please stop looking for one. gee, louise. * clears throat * BOP. 

“   –  you got a roommate he’ll hear what we do, it’s only awkward if you’re fucking him too.

✑  /  a song my muse would play on a road trip with yours  —  sunflower by post malone & swae lee. 

i want you to imagine them driving somewhere--anywhere--and damian got that damn aux cord, she cannot swipe it from him … he plays this. it’s a jam, we all know this, but he’s not just gonna sit there  –  he’s not going to let this song pass him by. so, he’ll sing his whole heart out and it’ll be a lot of fun whether she cares for it or not! 

“  –  she was all bad-bad, nevertheless. callin’ it quits now, baby, i’m a wreck.

[mde1011]

when i got into the dsmp i started a note and wrote down any quotes or moments i thought were funny, and im bored at 3 am so enjoy some of them

how is being arrested real? just walk away!!!”

⁃ “once an american always an american. go...go protests masks...or something”

⁃ “...yEAH BUT DID YOU HAVE WAP” “what’s...whats wap?” “...WORSHIP AND PRAYER”

⁃ “HOW DO YOU LIKE POLITICS MOTHERFUCKER”

⁃ “i’m naked” “...no you’re not” “i can be...”

⁃ “uhhhh i’m in a high stress situation....i deal with these poorly”

⁃ “i should go first i’m naked”

⁃ “yEAHHHH WE KILLED AN OLD MAN WITH HEART PROBLEMS”

⁃ “what are you going to do?” “i...have no idea i think i’m gonna start out by punching a tree”

⁃ “tOmmy...did i just hear you say shit ass looking mofo?”

⁃ “i aM gOinG to gEt nAkeD to iNtiMidAtE HiM”

- “...i want freedom !” “you want BALLS.”

⁃ “...down the line. yeah that’s where we discover the art of cannibalism” “oh it’s an art?” “it’s an art”

⁃ “oh there’s some logs here. wonder what they’re saying to me. uh huh. uh huh. oh yeah that’s very racist” “tommy you gotta burn those logs.” “burn ‘em before they spread their racism to other logs”

⁃ “are you pooing?” “*whisper* i’m charging up-““ “he’s ejaculating on the tent.” “he’s WHAT?”

⁃ “he’s sPEEDING. LOOK HOW FAST HES GOING” “i’ve taken so many drugs. someone tell badboyhalo”

⁃ “we should make a pact. and that pact is, uh, we make a book...and in that book...we declare that saying ‘muffin’ is a, is a slur”

⁃ “i was thinking what if one day your bladder just,,,,stopped working.....AGGGFFFFF i was tHINKING ABOUT THAT THE OTHER DAY IVE GOT TO PREPARE IVE GOT YO PREPARE thisiswhydiapersaintthatbad”

⁃ <sapnap> i think i was ordered to um

<tommyinnit> boobed

<sapnap> kill you

<tommyinnit> boobs

<sapnap> if this happens

<tommyinnit> think about boobs man

<sapnap> tsk tsk tommy

<tommyinnit> iM DISGRUNTLED

⁃ “why is this deadman so good at making drugs”

⁃ “i just learnt that a girl hero is called a heroine and it freaked me out”

⁃ “memento memento me-“ “that’s actually the worst word i know so you can’t keep saying that” “oh, really.....? have you ever heard the term ‘racist’?”

⁃ “the person who invented the phrase ‘be yourself’ hadn’t met you!”

⁃ “you seem like the type of guy whose dad would throw him overboard as a joke but he would just drown”

⁃ “shout out to dream for twerking!”

⁃ “let’s talk......let’s talk about sex” “wonderful. what do you think about sex, lazarbeam?” “i ain’t saying SHIT in front of a sixteen year old”

⁃ “what the- i think i’m seeing things” “....tommy i told you not to drink the sea water” “well i DID drink the sea water because it TOLD ME TO”

⁃ “it’s like the movie when that guy gets stranded on an island and has sex with a coconut” “whAT?? dream- dream, you vastly misinterpreted this” “it one hundred percent does”

⁃ “oh mastICATE.....isn’t that when a fish turns inside out?”

⁃ “what are some bad words YOU know, clay?” “i don’t-“ “what about ‘terrorist’?”

⁃ “my mind has to be on the same frequency as jesus when he walked on water”

⁃ “you wanna know why i was late?” “no i really do-“ “i was having a MASSIVE poo. really just a HUGE poo”

⁃ “jUST CUZ YOU TALK ABOUT POO ONCE AND THEN YOU SEE A BIG GREEN BASTARD AMD YOUR LIFE IS FLASHING BEFORE YOUR EYES AND THEN YOU CANT REMEMBER- YOU CANT REMEMBER IF IT WAS YESTERDAY OR TOMORROW YOU HURT THAT WOMAN”

⁃ “i love america. mmmmm patriotism

⁃ “LIFE IS NOT A HAPPY SONG KERMIT THE FROG”

⁃ “please stop taking the cock”

⁃ “two four six eight who do we appreciate? not the government let’s gooooooo”

⁃ “oooo look at the dogs😍” “wHAAAAAT. WHAT. THERES ACTUALLY LIKE. A MILLION DOGS HERE. WHAT THE HELL.”

⁃ “yeahhhhh bitch i stab- i don’t stab women-“ “woooooooah tommy you stab women?” “heyyyy sapnap”

⁃ “do you know what happens whne you reach the top of the ladder? there’s only one place to go.” “.....side to side😨” “down.” “...i really thought you were gonna say side to side🥺”

⁃ “one last time.” “just like in hamilton😓”

⁃ “you don’t know how many times i’ve mistaken trees for hot women”

⁃ “ i don’t feel better i just destroyed penis”

⁃ “i’ve never seen a snail with bad morals”

⁃ “awwwwwwww😢 i’m doin’ drugs🤧 just like the good ol’ days😓” “.....define the ‘good old days’” “back when i did drugs”

⁃ “have you ever fought a baby? i have and it was trivially easy to defeat, phil.”

⁃ “the only other i egg i know about was the one i learnt about in school....not allowed to say which one....”

⁃ “did you know one of my new years resolutions is to be more like 2010 justin bieber?”

⁃ “apparently cats don’t lay eggs”

⁃ “thinking about trees- if i saw a tree with a beard mmmmmm...holy shit id hit it”

⁃ “we’re in hell dude. science doesn’t matter here”

⁃ “i cant die i cant die i’m GOD”

⁃ “hey pig your letter is the same as pussy, hmm?”

⁃ “are we cool are we COOL guys? CRYSTAL COOL like CRYSTAL METH”

⁃ “he- he’s crying because - because i killed his mother isn’t that right? mother dearest mother deadest mother gonest”

⁃ “bro ive been drinking since i was six and let me tell you...it’s not good to be drinking that young. led to some poor life decisions when i was 8” “what did you do” “i cant say” “...who did you hurt” “....only myself”

⁃ “je suis” “ay i know what that mean you prick” “what does it mean” “it means you’re racist dickhead”

⁃ “i’d never poo in the presence of a women- which is why i’m scared to get a girlfriend i think i’d just explode”

⁃ “biff tannen is one of my idols”

⁃ “black widow died and i thought ‘wow it should’ve been the man’ because he’s a man”

⁃ “there’s a character called captain america and i think he’s stupid”

⁃ “i’m a GOOD LAD i’ve got GOOD MORALS and if i’ve DONE SOMETHING WRONG it WASNT MY FAULT I JUST GOT A LITTLE EXCITED”

⁃ “sam....what’s the longest you’ve ever wiped your arse? for me it’s 48 minutes”

⁃ “why are you standing in the shitter?” “....that’s a SINK” “uhhh welllll” “hAVE YOU SHAT IN THE SINK?????”

⁃ “you’re like a living ghost” “...i think that’s called a human, tubbo”

⁃ “maybe i accidentally kill ranboo and we just never see him again *laughs* ay? and then i go ‘april foooools!!!’ and then i kill their child. i kill him”

⁃ “you built a penis” “it’s a PENIS OF SAFETY”

⁃ “i saw the penis of safety and i pressed mouse button four my friend”

⁃ “the penis on the other side of the river is larger” “ive heard that before....”

⁃ “you’ve turned the penis into a wall” “a wall of safety is better than a penis of safety” “i think the penis was better”

⁃ “if you wanna make a penis i know where we can make a penis and i know how big we can make it”

⁃ “i don’t conceptualize death but i think i just saw it!”

⁃ “yeah i- yeah i know i’m- my first impression on eret was making him read a shrek fan fiction so- i’m not one for first impressions”

⁃ “i-i’m scared for him- i’m scared OF him. yknow the first thing he did when he saw me was imMEDIATELY strip down then jump off then immediately die?”

⁃ “where are you?” “getting stabbed, one second”

⁃ “you’ve seen the joker?” “yea-“ “i resonate a lot with that man” “...oH. oh. that’s- that’s not-“

⁃ “he bURNT DOWN MY HOUSE” “out of LOVE”

⁃ “ohhhh my god stop making me play with the neighbor kid” “o-okay if you don’t go play with him i’m kicking you out of the house-“ “wHAT THE FUCK???”

⁃ “there’s a STRIP CLUB” “oh yeah for wood!” “are you into strippers?” “i mean all it does is make the wood look different so....yeah it doesn’t really do much”

⁃ “no no we have categories, we have the poo-saster- you might have to take a shower after-“ “no, no i’m gonna stop you right there”

⁃ “as i was saying you can have a 1-to-3 wiper, that’s an A-tier poo, my friend”

⁃ “i want you to eat your sock”

⁃ “you know i’m a child- i’m a minor” “sO AM I DICKHEAD”

⁃ “everyone is calling you dresus” “yeah i am”

⁃ “ayyyy ayyyy los DROGAS LOS DROGAS” “no no big q- she’s thirteen- how does this happen with every 13 year old girl you meet?”

⁃ “my poo has muscles like i do”

⁃ “i cant hear the words among us without crying they’ll say there are aliens among us and in the back youll just hear me *choking noises*”

⁃ “tubbo...tubbo is like...tubbo is like mary” “.....did you just call me the Virgin Mary?”

⁃ “i’m just saying, have you ever seen me and jesus in the same room?”

⁃ “do you smoke sam” “all the time”

⁃ “i thought you were talking about the- the speeeeed drug”

⁃ “have you ever sold drugs to kids sam?” “......no”

⁃ “we can’t let the girlboss rule because she will gatekeepe my feelings” “that would not be good”

⁃ “THEY DIDNT INVITE ME TO KILL ME???? NOW I HAVE FOMO”

⁃ “you have obviously taken part in scientology-“ “i have not-“ “you’ve donated to tom cruises cult shit”

⁃ “....am i worse than david dobrik?” “are- are we worse than david dobrik?” “oh- oh god”

⁃ “he has broke one of the rules of the hit best seller ‘the bible’- this kind of looks like a cock”

⁃ “well i’ve moved now, KING”

⁃ “what is an angsty teen and am i one? because when i USED to hang out with my friends they use the word angst a lot”

⁃ “yeah yeah yeah i bench”

⁃ “sam i think i’m angsty i think i’m an angsty tik tok teen looking for a community to help me out”

⁃ “i don’t think you’ve followed the train of logic all the way-“ “there’s a TRAIN INVOLVED????????”

⁃ “i’m like the orange fucker from that animated rom com”

⁃ “i’m under the influence of big cock”

⁃ “it’s meeee big cock man”

⁃ “i cant look away” “sam please use your twitter alt for this” “he’s horny on maaaainnnnn” “and what’s wrong with that?” “.......”

⁃ “you’re a FUCKING IDIOT” “IM NOT A FUCKING IDIOT, BIG COCK”

⁃ “i’m gonna call you ‘cockity’ big cock” “sHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT THE FUCK UP-“

⁃ “STOP LOOKING AT IT” “ITS SO VIBRANT”

⁃ “at least this guy doesn’t have a cock-“ “itS NOT A COCK” “horny on main jesus-“

⁃ “is that a cock” “SHUT THE FUCK UP”

⁃ “.....i wanna see the inside of it again do a split”

⁃ “okay sam-“ “tommy that guy wants your cock-“ “no- no he doesn’t sam”

⁃ “sam, sam and i need you to hear this....dont. act. up.” “i don’t act up-“ “you were acting up-“ “i-“ “you were caught in 8k.” “but- but we both agree it’s not a tie-“

⁃ “please don’t tell me to kill cockity i am overwhelmed”

⁃ “why is there an anus in my tie?”

⁃ “what are the legal implications of this?” “...i mean besides hell you’re good”

⁃ “whatre the legal implications?” “i mean usually that’s a no-no but today, today it’s fine” “yeahhh lets go murder his family”

⁃ “i’d be an antivax landlord”

⁃ “jesus never does drugs” “well- well you turned water into wine king and wine is alcohol”

⁃ “can you put on pants i can’t- i cant stop looking at it- sorry tommy i know you said-“ “yeah sam i know you tried-“

⁃ “you know i fuck with satan”

⁃ “i’m sorry jesus lucifer is just such a good man-“ “oh you- hold me BACK FROM THIS FUCKER HOLD ME BACK ILL SEND HIM TO HELL YOU LIKE HELL-“

⁃ “are you jesus or just a man who grew a beard and put on a suit?”

⁃ “even the guy with his cock out is telling you to stop-“ “oh jesus, and i mean jesus-“ “shUT THE FUCK UP MAN”

⁃ “the best best way to slander him is to stop his offspring; we need to kick him the balls.....no? not a good....? alright us four each take a ball-“

⁃ “......why did jesus give him four scrotums man🙁🙁”

[insomniac-arrest]

The Red Polka-dot Umbrella

genre: sci-fi, wlw, original

words: 3k

Classifieds

You were the women with the red polka-dot umbrella hurrying down the Gran Demeter subway station with a coffee spill down your blouse. I was the girl with the black shrink-wrap hat on next to the guy playing Toxic on his harmonica. 

You had on yellow heels and maroon pants, your wallet fell out of your pocket as you shouted at some Tom Cruise looking guy to slow down. You didn’t look back.

It’s a black wallet with a belt buckle around the middle and four pockets on the inside, no ID but you’re missing an expired costco card and a good movie ticket. More importantly, your ticker was tucked away behind around like all 300 of your receipts.

Honestly, I’ll admit I considered just picking it up and pocketing your twenty-five bucks (heads-up: I already used the ten to buy a new vape. My bad).

But this is why I’m writing you: dear red-polka dot umbrella woman, I saw your ticker. Your numbers are in the single digits

Please contact me immediately, here’s my website and my number: [redacted]

CALL ME

summary: a young woman tries to return a wallet in a faceless city of a million people as time runs out

Here’s what Sheena knew: Gran Demeter station was a terribly busking site, busking was still stupid no matter what her roommate Tomcat said, and some lady she didn’t know was about to die.

Well, ‘didn’t know,’ was a relative term. Sheena knew that the lady liked tacky key charms (5 receipts), bad coffee (17 receipts from Mike’s Hardbrew), and had a thing for brightly colored shoes and extra large ridiculous scarves (too many receipts to count).

She knew she had a well-worn wallet with four pockets, all of her credit cards were disabled, and that she kept her ticker in her wallet after the bracelet part looked like it snapped. Sheena looked at the bright red ‘six’ on the dials like it was about to personally insult her family.

“Goddammit,” Sheena bit as she looked both ways across the platform. She could feel the rails rumbling and the stars were peaking out between the glass panels.

She shakes her head and moves from one bench to the next restlessly, she checks her watch for the fifth time and hopes the tram security were still paid below nebula minimum wage. They wouldn’t bother her then no matter how long she loitered between trams 5 and 6/

Her watches speakers buss to life, ��Miss Coilwrecker,’ she jumps when Kip addresses her by the name she’d asked him to a couple drunken nights ago.

“Uh,” she shakes her watch, “yeah, Kip?” She blinks, the universal assistant device blinks at her.

“You have,” buzz, “36 new messages,” buzz, “tram 340 coming in. Do you need a ticket?” “No Kip.” She says heavily with a sigh, running her thumb over the smooth leather in her pocket, “any of those messages end in someone yelling ‘punkt?’

“Around five ma’am.”

She blows air out of her nose, “Analyze the rest for sincerity levels.”

“Of course Ma’am,” the little device buzzes off, Sheena doesn’t think she’s communicated with it this much since month she lived here. She usually didn’t have any use for it except to order pizza and tell it to put certain songs on 12x repeat.

Sheena stood on her tiptoes as she got on top of the bench, the vibrations of the next tram shakes her through her toes. She grits her teeth, “come on.”

She rubs her fingers over the leather of the wallet again as the station braces for the repressurization of the tram, the smell of ozone already oozes out onto the platform. Sheena’s eyes are rake over the various people stuffed inside the first car.

Red umbrella, polka dots, bright scarves, she claws for anything she could possibly recognize from this lady. There was only today left.

Her pockets are weighed down and Sheena’s eyes bulge out as she spies a mountain of dark hair and someone wearing a bright yellow kerchief.

“Now we’re talkin,” she jumps down to walk toward the color just as the doors about to open.

She feels the woosh of the tram doors as they slide open and a rabble of commuters come pushing their way out of the interplanet transport tram.

“Oi!” Sheena pushes a Glibbon out of the way as he rubs part of his wet shoulder fins on her new jacket, she shakes off the sticky droplets before pushing her way forward toward the yellow.

She staggers forward and starts waving, “hey!” Sheena uses her outdoor voices as she elbows her way forward, “you in the yellow neck thing.” The woman was hurrying on rainbow high heels toward the exits blithely and Sheena groans as she has to start to jog forward.

“I said stop,” she reaches forward, “look you might be dying lady.” The woman in the yellow pivots on her heel, she turns on her roughly, “excuse me?” Sheena rolls her eyes, “hey you missing a wallet?” Yellow Scarf just blinks at her, Sheena snaps her fingers, “I said, you missing a wallet? Or just or manners...” She bites at her.

The woman bares her teeth, “I’m not missing anything, I have places to be. What are you going on about?” Sheena shakes her head, “okay,” she lets go of her elbow, “but if you see a woman in all this lot with a red umbrella,” she takes a deep breath, “her ticker is missing. It’s almost atta a zero.” The women’s eyebrows shoot up, “Well.” She clears her throat, her tone going down a few octaves, “I’ll uh, I’ll keep on the lookout.” Sheena gives her a little salute and watches her leave with her shoulder’s slumping, “yeah, thanks.” She says bluntly as she watches the yellow disappear and her heart sink. “Fuck.” That was mostly for her own benefit.

She starts scanning the crowd again, “Kip,” she speaks into her watch, “update.”

The little speaker on her wrist churns out a stream of static before responding crisply: “11 remaining messages, most reporting traces of confusion or tomfoolery.’

“Erg,” she watches a couple more bland woman pass, no red umbrella. No extra large scarves.

“However,” Kip pauses in some sort of misguided suspense algorithm coded in. “Current DNA swabs of public terrain interacted with is active.” “Yes?” Sheena eyes her metal screen, “this isn’t the damn Odyssey, get to it.”

Kip beeped, “77% DNA match of the wallet with a public database at 9:51am. Placed next to public handrails of Lilly Czern park. Midtown Curie burrough.”

Sheena nods several times in a row to a degree she feared might make her dizzy, “why the hell didn’t you say right away? Fucking ring me.” She starts to run, “we don’t have much time.”

“You told me on December 9th 3041 to install ‘chill protocol’ and I have in accordance been installing eve-” “Yeah yeah,” she starts to run.

The warm soggy air of Demeter hits her right away as she runs out onto the surface of the small planet, the familiar smell of poppy pretzel bites and corner booth food floods her senses. Sheena muscles her way through the early morning tram crowd and gets fed directions toward the high rises of the business district.

“Shitty firm ladies,” she shakes her head and can’t believe she’s trekking all the way down to the financial district to give someone back their expired Costco card. Sheena sucks it up and misses a ditch puddle as she fast-walks toward Curie Borough.

The sky above flashes lighter blue as the artificial ozone barrier tints for ‘mid-day’ ambiance, Sheena resists the regular urge to throw something at the sensors. A small dog yaps at her as she passes the first cupid trees and Sheena wrinkles her nose at it.

She stuffs her hand into her pocket and rubs the leather again, she didn’t have the heart to open the wallet yet and see if the ticker had gone down yet again.

“Miss Coilwrecker,” her wrist beeps and Sheena almost swallows her own tongue in surprise.

“What is it Kip?” She says gruffly as she passes the midsection of the long park and approaches the forty-story skyscrapers of downtown.

“Your friend Tomcat-”

“No.” “He would like to know-” “Absolutely not.” “He requires your presence at his ‘gig’ tonight. And,” there was a short stall, “questions your current choices in some colorful words.”

“Such as?” “Ahem,” Kip cleared some robotic throat it didn’t have, “stalking is frowned upon in all 50 planet districts. Let the moneyed clucks get what’s coming to them. Just because you’re going through a dry spell-” “Okay, I get it.” She cuts the universal assistant off. “He also reminds you to not get thrown in jail for having ‘one angry ass mug’ and threatening someone. Followed by more colorful words.” “I get it. Send him some colorful words back, I told him this had to get done, no stupid gig tonight or not.” She growls and glares down a security droid as it passes her.

“Which colors?” Kip asks briskly, almost off-put if I robot she programmed to have a British accent could be ‘off-put.’

“Fuck,” she says carefully, “off. Those ones.”

There is a slight pause, “Of course.” Kip buzzes back into silence and Sheena eyes the passing pedestrians on the sidewalk. Red umbrella. Sheena tries to scramble up on top of a bench to get a better viewpoint, she sees a sea of grey suits in all directions and hears the clatter of busy feat.

“Oh, left ma’am. DNA match with public crosswalk Zelda Street.” Kip pitches through in real time from her police record patch she installed.

“On it!” Sheena almost topples off the bench as she scrambles toward the crosswalk. Her pulse picks up as her eyes dart back and forth across a group of Nel in rapid chirping conversation. “Come on,” she turns in circles as she sees two different crosswalks, “come on.”

Sheena feels a peak of hopelessness as the city melds into a blur and she sees too many streets and not enough twenty-something woman. Sheena pauses when she sees red. Bright red.

“Kip,” she gasps as she reaches out and starts to run, a pair of bright green pants blared next to a wrought iron park fence.

Sheena takes a deep breath, “HEY!” She shouts and points, “you.” She must have said the words forcefully enough as a head of dark hair turns and the face of a wide-eyed young woman stares back at her. She had wide-set dark eyes and full lips, she was tall, a little taller than Sheena.

She had a red umbrella sticking out of her bag and a heavy silver scarf.

Sheena pointed at her and narrows her eyes, “don’t move a muscle.”

The woman’s eyes were still huge, Sheena reached into her pockets to bring out the wallet and throw it at her if she has to. She gets the leather in hand but that’s just as she hears the clacking of heels against pavement.

She looks up to see some disappearing green.

“What did I just say?” Sheena groans as she watches her target begin to run the other direction. “I swear, this is damn a charitable act!” Sheena calls after her.

She goes back and forth in her head for a moment, deciding if it’s worth it. In a burst of spite she follows her out into the crosswalk.

All she has to go off of is fluffy black hair and bright green pants, but the green was bright enough to put neon signs to shame, she ducks in between bushes and waves. “Wait, fucking wait.” The woman was trying to cross a busy street of tubes and geocars. She doesn’t look behind her, Sheena considers kicking her as she gets close enough.

“Wallet,” she calls out, “It’s your wallet.” The woman just looks over her shoulder at her and walks straight into traffic, Sheena throws her hands up, “oh come on.” She’s forced to find another way across the five lanes when the crossing sign comes on and she somehow catches the last of the woman entering a building. Sheena is about to go football-tackle that woman and stuff the wallet in her mouth when she gets a message.

“Direct transmission,” Kip drones, “direct transmission.” “Now?” She huffs, “I’m busy.” “Direct transmission sent at 10:21 am from proximate personal Kip.” “Uh,” Sheena stared at Kip for a moment.

“10:21, message received,” static goes over the speakers before comes out in a hollowed mechanical voice, “I don’t want it.” Sheena blinks, “Want what?” “Message analysis,” Kip pauses for a moment, “it.”

“I don’t have time for this.” She pushed her way into the building she saw the woman enter. The Demeter Planetary Bank building, the front desk person eyes her but she manages to get to the elevator and get inside.

Sheena starts by pressing all 27 of the elevator buttons and watches her elevator mates leave with a couple deep grumbles at her. “Yeah yeah.” She waves them out.

“Message received.” Kip informs him. “Repeat message received.” “What is it?” “Stop.”

Sheena clicks on one of the side buttons of her watch, “send back the message: hold the hell still and I will.” “Yes Coilwrecker.”

Sheena blows air out of her nose and waits.

She feels her skin crawl as she passes more endless dim hallways and sees nothing but unfamiliar faces.

“My name is Sheena by the way,” she says into her watch.

Kip clicks to life, “Would you like me to call you-” “No, send that to the girl. She somehow got my number.” “Visual transmissions are now possible through singular contact and-” “Yes, go tell her my name. And that her numbers are going down.”

Kip goes quiet and Sheena checks the last hallway to see if she could get anything, “message received on the roof.” “Yes!” Sheena bullies a timid looking office worker into pointing her toward the roof access and she runs. There was a lot of running today.

Sheena bursts the roof door open and hollers, “stop!” She catches the woman’s bright eyes, Sheena cups her mouth, “You’re gonna fucking die.” She puts her hands up defensively in response, “I don’t have any more money.” Sheena groans deeply, “no wait, not like that.” She backs up and Sheena closes the door behind her before yanking out her pocket contents. She takes out the ticker, the red letter announcing an ominous ‘3.’ “Have you even been paying attention to your VF? Dumbass.” Her eyebrows shoot up, “someone really found that…” Sheena balls up her free hand and cowboy-walks over, “yeah. And it was a pain.” The woman covers her face and groans as she descends to the ground, her legs buckling at the new, “just throw it over the roof.” Sheena’s face falls a little, “what’re you talking about polka-dot lady?” She peers up between her fingers, “...polka-dot lady?” Sheena shrugs, “For the umbrella.” She rubs her neck and the woman looks up at her curiously. “And you

“Flores,” she says slowly, “my name is Flores.” Sheena puts her hand out, “Sheena.” She says bluntly, “I’ve been tracking you for two days now. Sheena.” Flores cocks her head to the side, “just for my wallet?” Sheena shakes the ticker in her hand, “dude, you are literally almost at 0.” Flores turns away and faces the street view, she hangs her head and they both stare out over the city.

“What’s the point?” She sighs and swings her foot over the side. “Let’s just say I’m screwed either way.” She looks up and her hair falls around her face, “I couldn’t make it.” Sheena itches the back of her hand, she glances back at the door and then the spot next to the stranger. She rubs her nose for a moment, she takes the seat next to her, settling down slowly with her legs hanging off the edge. The dizzying gray streets lay below.

“Please,” Sheena pushes her wallet toward her, “you still have one more punch before you get a free coffee at Hardbrew. You still have 20% a chipotle burrito.” Flores turns her face toward her slightly, she grins slightly, “you went through my stuff?” “Well,” Sheena’s mouth falls open.

Flore cracks a painted smile and lets out a little laugh, like the scratch of bark or something low and rumbling tumbling through the air. “Alright then.” Sheena looks away, “I was trying to find a way to return the dang thing.” Flores chuckles again, “did you find it on the train? I was a little freaked when I first lost all 25 bucks and all of my dead credit cards.” Sheena flashes her a grin, “And like 300 receipts.”

“Those too!” They laugh.

Sheena looks at from her purple pumps to her flowey pearl shirt, “okay, but I may or may not have bought a new vape with your stuff, but uh.” She looks her up and down, “you looked like someone who could use their wallet back.” Flores puts her hand out, “Do I?” She hums, “you work down here?” Sheena lifts an eyebrow, “Do I look like I work down here?” She displays her chipped painted nails and ripped pants.

Flores smiles, “Right.” Sheena hunches over, “I was just playing in the terminal. Or. My friend was playing and I was making fun of him as all you business people went to work.” She snorts, “told him it was a bad spot.” Flores bites her lip, “you play something too?” Sheena pushes her wallet toward her, “tell you what.” She wags it in front of her, “pay back your ticker and I’ll play you something on my violin. Which,” she winks, “I don’t just play for anyone.” Flores frowned slightly, “why?” “I dunno, I don’t just whip out the amp for-” “No, I mean, why would you do that?” She seems a little struck, “You don’t even know me. You don’t have to… I’m just.” Sheena slapped her on the back and shakes her shoulder a little bit, “tickers are bullshit.” She says forcefully, “I wouldn’t wish a 0 on anyone, even not a shopaholic, brightly colored cute lady, ya know?”

“Oh,” Flores says gently, “that’s, that’s sweet. I suppose...I suppose it’s bad. When the VF goes...you know, goes.” “Yeah. Death is like,” she pokes her, “kinda bad.” She laughs warmly before leaning forward, she flinches, “I don’t suppose folding under crippling debt can be any better.”

Sheena follows her gaze thoughtfully up and away toward the skyline, “I’ll teach you how to get overly sized stupid scarves from thrift shops instead if that would help.” Flores snorts and then puts her head in her hands, “You know the most idiotic part?” Sheena studies her, “running around downtown for some stranger with bad habits?” She sniffs, “I went down to 13 ‘cause I thought I could buy my way into getting him to not fucking leave.” She almost shakes from something red in the other woman’s vision. She gives a hollow laugh, “none of it worked.”

Sheena looks away, she traces her eyes over the bumpy skyline, “Look,” She says slowly and puts her hand out, “this fucking place…” She meets her eyes, “it eats everyone up.”

“You’re telling me.” The lines on Flores face creased and fell. “But you made it all the way out here.” She leans toward her, “Made it this far.” Flores glances at her, she studies her hand like an intricate portrait, “yeah.” She takes her hand and they sit there for a very long moment, silently, waiting, watching.

“I remember you,” Sheena turns slowly as Flores speaks lowly, “I remember. The girl in black at the station, with the hat out. You weren’t playing though, yeah,” Flores smile was something faint and promising, the dawn. “It’s a shame.” They both look down and Sheena presses a knob on her watch, “here.” She starts the transaction as their skin graces each other. Flores mouth makes a perfect ‘o’ before Sheena touches her wrist softly, she closes her eyes and feels it, Kip makes the transfer.

Flores blinks a couple times from the contact transfer. “What…” She dives for her wallet, and Sheena looks away as the other woman sees the 17 on her counter now.

She hears another sharp gasp, “I don’t know what to say.” Sheena bites her lip, “everyone could use a break now and then.” She smiles down at her shoelaces, “I don’t mind being someone’s once or twice.”

“I think you overpaid me.” “N-” Before the word comes out of her mouth Sheena turns her head and finds a soft press to the side of her mouth, she gasps. She turned right into a slight kiss.

Another contact VL transfer, an electric pulse runs up her spine.

She pecks her on the side of the mouth, Sheena’s ticker goes up one more point. Her cheeks flare a particularly high tone of red and Flores face is equally rouge. “Thanks,” Flores squeezes her hand, “thank you so much.” Her eyes are wide and she feels something warm and fluttery rise in her gut, “you didn’t need to.” Flores smiles like the dawn again, wide and all-encompassing, “I know.” She bites her lip, “I wanted to. I didn’t mean, but I hope it wasn’t, I mean.” She was blushing again. “If it wasn’t-”

Sheena grabs her hand and lifts it up, “It’s a start.” She kisses the knuckles and Flores laughs as they lean into each other.

The breeze whips around them and they sit there for a very long moment with the promise of heavy clouds on the horizon.

Flores says she’s more than welcome to walk home with her under her umbrella.