#okay done being angsty gonna try to make this a good day at all costs!!!

[desperatepleasures]

woke up anxious for some reason (weird melatonin dreams that I can't remember maybe?) and then got sad about how I can't say goodbye to my cat before I leave for work bc he always sleeps in my ex's room 🙃

[ragingbookdragon]

The Daughter Of Superman, The Adopted Son Of Batman...What Could Go Wrong? PT. 1

Jason Todd x Kryptonian!Reader One-Shot

Word Count: 3.8K Warnings: Explicit Language

Author's Note: I totally forgot about this one! If you like how cute and fluffy it is, just wait for PT. 2! It gets angsty >:) -Thorne

**********************************************************************

They were pretty lazy teenagers when they weren’t busy saving the world with super speed, strength, and smarts. Even if their textbooks were spread all over his bed they were still too lazy to actually do their homework, instead scrolling through social media apps and trolling all the citizens of San Francisco about the identities of the Young Justice Team.

She glanced up from the advanced calculus textbook and stared at the boy laying across her thighs. “Tim, isn’t your dad hosting a gala this weekend?” he hummed in response, and she asked, “Are we allowed to come?”

He didn’t bother looking up from the tablet he was tapping at and nodded. “Yeah. Bruce already added your names to the list, (Y/N).” a flicker of a smile came over his lips and he added, “Of course I had to wear him down in order to get Bart on the list.”

She looked over at their speedster and grinned. “I’m kinda surprised Bruce actually let you on the list Bart.”

A shocked expression etched across his face and he questioned, “Why do you say that?”

(Y/N) shifted Tim’s head, smiling as he grunted from being moved, and rose from the bed, walking over to the minifridge. She pulled out a soda before jumping back on the bed. “Because between you, Tim, Conner, and me, you’re the one who gets us into the most trouble.” She shifted Tim’s head back into her lap, petting his hair until he smiled.

“I do not!”

“Oh really? Do you remember prom night? It’s been almost two years and they stillcall us and talk about the absolute mess we—well, you caused.”

“That cake wasn’t there when I started running, I swear!” he pointed at Tim. “Tim it wasn’t! You know that!”

The others cackled at his protest, and (Y/N) glanced at Conner. “You gonna bring M’Gann?”

A faint pink tinged his cheeks, and he shifted his gaze down at his physics textbook. “Uh…maybe.”

(Y/N) leaned forward, poking his cheek. “Your heart’s beating pretty fast, little brother.”

He swatted her hand and glared at her. “Shove off.”

She snorted and glanced at Tim. “What about you, Timbers? You going to go with Stephanie?”

“Steph and I aren’t dating anymore, (Y/N).”

“For now. But you two like each other.” She smiled and singsonged, “She’s your first love~”

“What about you?” Tim scowled. “Who’s your date?”

She grunted at him and laid flat in the bed, Bart’s legs under her back. “Are you kidding me? You know my dad won’t let me get a boyfriend, let alone a date to a gala for a night.”

“You’re nineteen, (Y/N). I think you’re allowed to start dating.”

“And my parents help pay for part of my utilities. Does it look like I’m going to do anything to tip that delicate balance of not having to pay for all that?” she sighed. “Dad’s always been that way when it comes to me.”

“Daddy’s little girl.” Conner grinned.

(Y/N) grunted and reached over, shoving Conner off the bed. “Don’t call me that. I am not a daddy’s girl.”

The others laughed at her and Tim quipped, “Yes, you are. You two go on father-daughter dates every month and take pictures to show everyone.” She glared at him and he smiled, continuing, “Maybe we can find a date for you at the gala.”

“You can try. But mom and dad are going to be there. If dad sees me with a boy, he’s liable to lose his mind.” The others laughed again, and (Y/N) rested her head down on Bart’s lap. “I need a dress, Timmy.”

He glanced over at her and tapped a few buttons before showing her the screen. “How does this look?”

(Y/N) took the tablet from him and looked over it, taking in the image of the navy-blue dress. “I like the color, but this is a Cinderella dress. Give me something not as…poofy.” He nodded and took the tablet back, tapped on it, then handed it back to her. “Hmm…too booby.” The other two boys giggled at her answer and Tim sighed, taking the tablet again.

He handed it back to her once more and she looked at the dress. “Mermaid silhouette…sheer side…strappy back…” She glanced up at Tim and nodded. “Got a pair of shoes to match?” He hummed and she grinned. “Then I’ll take it. Thanks Timbers.” He nodded once more, and she nudged Bart. “Oi Allen.”

“What?”

“Don’t run into the cake at the gala, okay? It’ll probably cost more than you.”

“It was an accident! Stop bringing it up!” The others simply laughed at him.

***At The Kent Farm***

“Mom! Dad! Jon! I’m home!” She shut the door behind her and turned, catching Jon who’d launched himself at her. “Kid you’re getting too big to do that.” He laughed at her and she let him down, ruffling his hair. “Where’s mom and dad?”

“Out back with Krypto.” He tugged on her sweatshirt. “Did you bring me anything from the tower, sissy? Did ya? Did ya?”

(Y/N) snorted and rummaged in her pocket, pulling out one of Tim’s crimson shurikens. “Tim gave this to me to give to you.” She handed it to him but held it when he reached for it, “Do not,” she warned firmly, “cut yourself with this or mom and dad will make you give it back after they finish tearing me a new one for giving it to you.”

“I won’t!” he promised and she watched his eyes light up in wonder when he took it. She ruffled his hair once more before walking towards the backdoor.

She stepped outside and saw her dad throwing a ball with Krypto, her mom watching from the back porch; she walked over and leaned down, pressing a kiss to her cheek. “Hey, mom.”

Lois glanced up at her and smiled. “Hey, sweetheart. You’re home early.”

(Y/N) nodded, sitting down beside her. “School let out for the week, and we didn’t have any missions from the Justice League, so I figured I’d spend a few days here instead of cooped up in the tower.”

“I’m glad you decided to come home, hon. It’s always nice when you come back.”

She looked up and saw Clark walking towards her. “Hey, dad.”

He pressed a kiss to the top of her head. “Hey sweetheart, how were the boys?”

“They’re good. We did our usual thing.”

Clark sat on her other side. “Collapse on Tim’s bed and lay around like lethargic teenagers?”

(Y/N) snorted and shoved his shoulder lightly. “We were productive young adults. We finished over-break assignments and reports. Well…mostly. Still got that thirty page physics paper I have to write but…I’ll let that stew awhile.”

He chuckled. “Anything else happen today?”

“Talked about the gala this weekend.” She paused. “You guys are coming too, right?” They nodded and (Y/N) laid back on the porch, pulling out her phone. “Ugh…I remember how badly the Wi-Fi sucked out here. I don’t have any service at all.” She looked at her mom. “I don’t how a journalist like you manages to live in the middle of nowhere like this and still stay sane.”

Lois snorted and thumped her leg. “It’s called satellite service. Now c’mon, let’s go inside. Dinner should be done by now.” (Y/N) rose from the porch and they all began walking in when the sound and feel of rushing air came over them. She and Clark immediately spun, ready to defend themselves when they saw Conner hovering in the sky.

His eyebrows were drawn in slight concern. “(Y/N)! We need you!”

She nodded, shucking off her sweatshirt and pants, revealing the blue suit underneath. The crimson cape billowed around her and she glanced up at him. “What’s the situation?”

“We’ve got simultaneous bank robberies all over SF. Bart and Tim are already on the first few. I came to get you.”

(Y/N) turned to her parents. “Rain check on dinner guys.” She turned in the direction of San Fransisco, eyes darting wildly as she viewed her teammates positions. After a second, she nodded. “I’ve got em, Bart’s on the east, Tim’s on south. You take north and I’ll take west.”

He nodded and she shot up from the ground. They were almost in San Francisco when her father’s voice reached her. “Be careful, (Y/N).”

She curled her fists when the bank doors came into view and responded, “Always am, dad.”

***

“The dress looks fine, (Y/N).”

She glanced up at Tim who was smiling at her; she let out a sigh, letting go of the side strap she’d been tugging, still semi-uncomfortable with how it fit. “I know it does. But I feel like it’s still a little…grown up for me. I’ve never had a dress this open in the back or the sides since…ever.” The boys laughed and she smiled at Bart and Conner. “I forgot how well you two cleaned up.”

Bart pulled at both sides of the bowtie and winked at her, while Conner merely grunted, “I still hate tuxedos.”

“You’re definitely going to hate the long hours of your wedding then.” They laughed once more, and the car pulled around the venue.

Tim looked at them and grinned. “Show time, lady and gents.” They followed him out of the limo, grinning at the cameras as they walked inside.

Immediately, the view made her eyes go wide and she gaped. “Damn…this place is…really big.”

Tim shrugged nonchalantly, “I dunno, the ballroom in Wayne manor is bigger, but definitely more expensive.”

Bart shook his head. “Tim, my dude…we live on minimum wage not a billionaire’s salary.” (Y/N) and Conner simply nodded, still dumbfounded at the sheer size.

Tim rolled his eyes and looked around. “There’s Bruce and the others.”

She glanced in the direction he was looking and she saw her parents with Bruce. “Looks like mom and dad are busy chatting.” The others nodded and she turned to Tim. “What exactly are we supposed to do at a gala?”

“Have fun?” (Y/N) heaved a sigh and stared at him until he said, “You dance and drink and eat. That’s all you do.” He waved his hands. “Go knock yourselves out.”

They started to fan out when (Y/N) called out to them. “Wait!” They paused, turning back around. “We should go talk to Bruce and tell him thanks for inviting us.” They nodded and followed Tim over to Bruce.

He saw them coming and turned, holding out his hand to her. “Good to see you, (Y/N). You look wonderful this evening.”

Her cheeks warmed at the compliment and she smiled, giving his hand a firm shake. “It’s good to see you too, Mister Wayne, you don’t look too bad yourself. Thank you for inviting us to the gala.” The others shook his hand, and she turned to her parents. “Hey mom, dad.”

Lois walked around her and squealed, “You look so beautiful!”

(Y/N) cleared her throat, feeling her cheeks warm as the others smiled in her direction. “Mom…chill out, you’re embarrassing me.” She merely laughed but stepped back over to Clark’s side and (Y/N) looked around. “Bart have you—and he’s already at the buffet table.” Snickers sounded behind her and she sighed. “I’m going to make sure that the bottomless pit doesn’t devour all your food before your guests can eat, Mister Wayne.”

They watched her walk off and when she got over to the table Bart was standing in front of, she saw him shoving food in his mouth. “Oh my god…Bart, what are you doing?”

He turned to her, and swallowed, a sheepish smile crossing his face. “I haven’t eaten anything today,” he licked his thumb clean. “I’m hungry.”

(Y/N) rolled her eyes and sighed. “Just try not to eat your fingers, would you?”

He snorted and pointed to an appetizer. “You should try the pigs-in-a-blanket. They’ve got this sauce on top that’s just—.”

A low voice cut him off. “They have pigs-in-a-blanket! What!” They turned to see a young man a couple years older than them reaching over. “The old man’s never had something this plain at a gala.” He popped one in his mouth, then turned to them. “You’re Timberly’s friends, right?”

They nodded and (Y/N) gazed, something about him tugging at her mind. “I know you from somewhere.” She stared into his teal eyes and suddenly she remembered where she knew him from; she’d never forget those teal eyes and how angry they’d been. “You’re Jason Todd, aren’t you? Bruce’s second son.”

He grinned. “That’s me. Have you and I met before? I have to agree with you, because you look really familiar.”

(Y/N) glared at him and crossed her arms, spitting. “We met in the Hall of Fallen Titans three years ago.”

Jason’s eyes briefly widened, before they narrowed in amusement. “You’re the one who threw me out the third story window after I kicked Timber’s ass.” He chuckled. “You don’t have to worry about all that, doll. Timmy and I are good now. You can ask the speedster about it.”

She continued to glower at him until Bart leaned over, propping his chin on her shoulder. “He’s telling the truth, (Y/N). Tim told me a while back that he and Jason are brothers now.”

Jason nodded and she finally stopped glaring at him. “Just so you know Jason, I can still throw people out windows.”

He smiled and held out a hand, watching her place hers in it; he brought her hand up to his lips and pressed a kiss to the back of it. “I wouldn’t have it any other way, doll.”

Bart poked her side and grinned. “I’m gonna go see Tim and Conner. I’ll leave you two alone.”

He wandered off and (Y/N) pulled her hand back. “So, why are you here? Aren’t you supposed to be dead?”

Jason chuckled. “Oh, I was. I got better. We just made up a story about me getting lost, yadda yadda yadda, I’m not important.” He propped his elbow on the wall above her and grinned. “But what is important, is how pretty you look in your dress.”

(Y/N) cocked a brow. “Is that supposed to flatter me?”

“Is it not?”

“It could be a little better.”

He laughed and she found herself smiling along with him. He nodded towards the balcony. “Wanna get some air?”

She nodded, and they walked out into the night. (Y/N) gazed up at the stars and sighed in wonder. “There’s billions of them out there…I’ve never tried to leave earth and go search for them on my own.”

Jason leaned on the railing and gazed at her. “How come?”

(Y/N) shrugged, leaning against the railing too. “Dad’s full Kryptonian…me and Jon are, to use a less than favorable term, half-breeds.” She paused. “I’m not sure if I would survive like dad does out in space.”

“Won’t know ‘til you try.”

She huffed a laugh and looked at him. “If I’m wrong, I might die.”

“And if you try and you’re right, you won’t be dead.”

She shook her head at him, a smile playing at her lips. “You’ve got answers to everything, don’t you, Jason?”

He grinned at her. “I find that being sharp and witty helps with the crowds, doll.” The music sounded from inside the ballroom, and he stepped back, offering her a hand. “May I have this dance?”

(Y/N) rested her hand in his, feeling him pull her close, his other hand resting on her lower back; it was warm against her open skin and she cleared her throat. “I should warn you, I can’t dance to save my life.”

A cocky smirk crossed his lips and he leaned down, his lips brushing her ear. “I can take the lead, doll…all you have to do is give it to me.”

“Your flirtations need work too.”

Jason chuckled in her ear, making her shiver as he pulled back. “I don’t think they do.”

“Arrogance isn’t attractive, Jason.”

“Mhm.”

“It isn’t.”

“I heard you the first time, doll.” As they swayed to the music, he asked, “So, how’d you and Nerd-bird become friends?”

“We met through Conner.”

“The clone?”

“My brother.”

“Sorry.”

“He introduced the two of us, and we’ve been friends ever since.”

“Only friends? Nothing more?”

It was (Y/N)’s turn to smirk and she looked at him. “Are you asking because you want to know if there’s competition?”

He stopped moving and they stood still, her in his arms. “Just want to know if there’s anyone between me and first place.”

She huffed a laugh. “God, you’re something else.” Her eyes found his and she asked, “Do you want to get out of here?”

Jason nodded and stepped back, holding out his hand. “Where do you want to go?”

(Y/N) smirked and stepped forward, closing the distance he’d created, and wrapped an arm around his waist. His teal eyes widened, and she looked back at the party; no one noticed them, and she turned back to face him, “Up, up, and away.” They flew upwards, and she felt him latch onto her. “Why are you acting like I’m going to drop you, Jason?”

He made a waring noise in his throat. “I have a friend who’s an Amazon, and she is…very fond of throwing and dropping me.”

(Y/N) giggled. “Sounds like we’d get along spectacularly. She likes dropping you…I like throwing you out of windows…”

“That was one time. And you caught me when I was off-guard.”

“Uh huh, sure. You got your ass kicked by a sixteen-year-old and I think you’re just bitter.”

He grumbled at her. “Rub it in, why don’t you, doll.” She laughed and lowered them down; their feet hit the roof and he looked at it. “Wayne Enterprises? Why?”

She shrugged. “Cool tower…nice view.” She took a seat on the ledge, listening to him sit beside her.

He leaned over. “Almost romantic…don’t you think?”

(Y/N) eyed him, seeing a goofy smile on his face; she snorted, shoving him lightly. “You’re cheesy.”

“So I’ve been told.”

She glanced back at the water. “You know if this goes anywhere, my dad and your dad aren’t going to be happy.”

Jason snorted, nonchalantly replying, “Doll, there’s a few things I’m afraid of in life. Superman and Batman…are not those things.”

“Is that arrogance or confidence I hear coming through?”

He shrugged. “Probably a bit of both.”

(Y/N) smiled, then she felt his hand rest on hers, letting him link their fingers; she turned her face to him. “Is this the part where you tell me I’m beautiful and ask to kiss me?”

Jason grinned. “No, this is actually the part where I tell you you’re drop dead gorgeous…can I kiss you?”

She giggled, leaning in, and just before his lips brushed hers, she whispered, “You know I can kick your ass, right?”

He groaned. “Should I mention that strong women really do wonders to me?”

(Y/N) huffed a laugh and brought her free hand up, curling in his shirt. “Shut up and kiss me, Jason.”

“With pleasure.” His lips met hers, and she felt him bring his hand up, cupping her cheek. She pulled back ever-so-slightly, but he chased her, pressing his lips to hers again. He let go of her hand and brought his other hand up. He lowered her down until (Y/N)’s back was flat against the ledge; the chill from the stone made her arch her back off it, and press into his chest.

Jason pulled away slightly and smirked at her. “Cold?”

She rolled her eyes at him. “If you want to keep making out, jokes aren’t going to do the job.” He snorted at her and leaned forward again, intent on kissing her senseless when someone cleared their throat, startling them.

They sat up quick as lightning, turning in the direction of the sound. “I wondered where my daughter had flown off to.”

“Oh my god,” she hissed and covered her face with her hands. “Dad. C’mon…seriously?” Clark stepped onto the ledge and walked towards them.

Jason leaned down, whispering, “Is he going to throw me off the ledge?”

This made her giggle despite trying not to and she shoved him. “Shut up, Jason.”

He grinned at her and rose from his position, standing in front of her father. “Mister Kent.”

“That’s my daughter.”

“Oh, I know it is. I still remember how she threw me out of a building a few years ago. I get teary thinking about it.”

The corner of Clarks mouth rose, but then dipped back down, and (Y/N) stood up. “Dad, I’m nineteen. This whole, ‘daddy’s little girl can’t date’ bit, is getting old.” A hurt look crossed his face and she stepped forward, taking his hand. “To you, I’ll always be your little girl, dad. But sooner or later you’ve gotta come to grips with me dating and having…mature relationships.”

Clark held her gaze, then glanced at Jason who grinned and gave a thumbs up. “Does it have to be one of his kids? I mean if it’s going to be, I like Tim.”

“Ew, gross. Tim’s my best friend.”

“What about Dick?”

“Nice butt, but he and Kori are dating.” She paused and smiled at him. “The only one left is Jason, dad.”

Clark eyed Jason once more, then Jason offered, “If it makes you feel any better, I’m slightly afraid of your daughter.”

He sighed. “Thank you, Jason. I can tell.” Turning to her, he cupped her cheek. “It feels like yesterday I was bringing you home for the first time.”

“Dad…stop…we don’t need sentimentality right now.”

Clark hummed and smiled at her, pressing a kiss to her forehead; he turned to Jason and leveled him with a hard look. “I don’t think I need to warn you about what happens if you make her sad.”

Jason gave him a mock salute. “Chances are I’ll be in ICU after I was thrown out a building.”

“Oh my god. Let that go.”

They laughed, and Clark rose from the rooftop. “I’ll need to get back to the party. Don’t do anything crazy.”

They waved him off and (Y/N) turned to Jason. “Do you want to get something to eat?”

He nodded. “There’s a pizza shop down the block from here.”

“Sounds great.” (Y/N) rose a few feet off the roof when she heard a cough behind her.

She spun around and looked down at Jason. “Doll…I don’t know if you know this…but I can’t fly.”

“Whoops. My bad.” She lowered back onto the rooftop and held out her arm.

He walked into it and wrapped an arm around her waist, then tipped his head to her. “Up, up, and away.”

(Y/N) snorted as she rose. “You’re still cheesy, Jason.”

The grip on her waist tightened as he murmured, “I know.”

[vivithefolle]

What are your favourite fanfic tropes/aus for romione?

(I’m gonna try to make my way through old asks I received AGES ago and never answered because I’m a procrastinating lump. Here’s betting I’m going to give up and play videogames all day instead.)

Oh my god, so many.

Okay so as a rule of thumb as long as it’s nice to Ron I’ll read it. I’ll read anything. I have been known to read Ron/Draco and even sacrificed my dignity and everything I stand for as a human being by reading some Ron/Snape stuff. Yes. I was THAT desperate. This is how low I’m willing to go because of sheer love for Ron.

Which means that when a fic will go “oh poor Hermione, poor Hermione who is waiting for Ron to grow up because She can see one day he could be worth it but for now he’s all dumb-dumb and inferior and doesn’t deserve Her perfection :(”, I will be judging. Judging very hard. I may not leave a comment but rest assured, my thoughts are loud enough for me. This is 2010s mentality. This is “haha I’m so like Hermione, not like other girls who throw themselves at boys, I’m so special and girl powery :)” Horribly Bad Feminism. Fuck that. We’re doing better now.

Speaking of doing better. Recently I read something about how Ron is, paraphrased, “the brute of the Trio”, spun in a positive way since he uses his strength to protect them but, but, still... please no? Just no! Just eff no with these takes about how Ron is a hypermasculine dudebro M For Manly™! No, no, fucking no! Just because he’s the Sulfur to Hermione’s Mercury and Sulfur represents the masculine component to Mercury’s feminine one, DOESN’T MEAN Ron is “the brute”! (”the” brute... seriously... who’s the more brutish one, the one who punches a racist in the face or the one who uses a torture curse as retribution for spitting on his fave teacher?)

The way I see him, Ron is a balance, a blend of feminine and masculine qualities intertwined close together. I LOVE that he can swear like a sailor but can only say “scarlet woman” or “cow” when it comes to insulting a woman. Some will probably see it as “hurr durr he sexist he doesnt think women can take it!!!!!!! >8C” but given that those are probably also the peeps who say “HE CALLE D HERMOANI A NIGHTMURRR!!!!!!! DDDDD8″ I’m gonna venture the idea that we don’t care about those folks’ biased, sexist opinions.

Where was I going with this... oh yes! Ok, so Ron can swear like a sailor yet couldn’t insult a girl to save his life. He’s strong physically but most of all he’s strong mentally (to put up with the way his friends treat him for years speaks a lot of his mental fortitude... and to top it off he comes back for more to boot! I’m not sure if that’s more mental fortitude or straight-up masochism though.) When he succeeds at things he gets a bit attention-whoreish but at the same time, you can see that when he’s being complimented he’s all unsure of himself and blushy and shy and you just, dude you can’t handle positive attention because you don’t know how to react to it I don’t know whether that’s adorable or the saddest thing I’ve seen in my life? He’s insecure but he’s always the first to cheer on Harry and Hermione when they’re doing something great, which speaks VOLUMES of Ron’s selflessness and of his actual character: to quote @peetamaellark​, Ron doesn’t think “Harry is great, therefore he sucks and I hate him”, he thinks “Harry is great, therefore I suck and I hate me”. THIS is Ron. THIS is why Ron will lash out, not because he hates Harry, but because internally he hates himself and you can’t keep that sort of feeling bottled up for too long before... you got it, you explode.

I. Want. More. Fics where Hermione isn’t this ~oh dear~ Victorian damsel in distress who cries and Ron is the Big Strong Man who holds her with one arm and is stony-faced and goes “I’ll protect you”, please no that was old before it existed, let us have nice, realistic depictions of Ron and Hermione please.

Like, Hermione is more than capable of kicking butt herself. She IS absolutely nervous and scared and cries easily and that’s a vulnerability we NEED, but the fact that she can be super scared and crying but still hex her opponent into oblivion? THAT’s good, THAT’s excellent. It’s a very important message for girls, I think. “You can cry, you can be sensitive, you can be emotional, AND you can still kick butt”. And as important as that message is for girls, it’s also a very important message to give boys, because boys are socialized to “never cry” and that’s super unhealthy. I love Ron’s admiration of Hermione. I love the way Ron hesitates, the way he can be cautious when he needs to as much as he can be reckless and impulsive. I love how he shows himself to be a big softie and a sweet soul. I don’t think that makes him an “emasculated doormat” (to quote a guest I once saw on FFN), on the contrary it makes him an even better man in my eyes. You know why I love the locket scene so much? Because Ron’s tears aren’t ridiculed. Ron gets to cry about the terrible ordeal he’s been put through, and while Harry “pretends he can’t see Ron cry” because it’s more comfortable for him personally, he doesn’t try to tell Ron to “man up” or anything. His reassurance is pretty lousy but he lets Ron cry, he lets his friend be upset, and he doesn’t try to invalidate Ron’s pain. (ok, the “I thought you knew” is kiiiiinda on the way there, but it stops at that and I’m grateful for it).

I like. Seeing Ron distressed. I like seeing Ron upset and be allowed to be upset. I like to see Ron’s pain treated with respect. So when Ron is having a shit day I like to see him get a cuddle. I like seeing Ron go through horrible ordeals and break down and for his breakdown to be properly acknowledged and not turned into insensitive comic relief (ISN’T THAT RIGHT, LATTER HALF OF THE SILVER DOE????). I mean seriously, just imagine GOF, Harry sitting in the hospital wing after Cedric’s death, Molly Weasley gives him a hug and it’s all very sad and angsty. And now picture Ginny running into the room screaming “HARRY JAMES POTTER” and punching him over and over and saying “PULL YOURSELF TOGETHER MAN, PULL YOURSELF TOGETHER” then after two pages of Harry “explaining” himself to Ginny she goes away saying “aight but if you do that shit again you’ll have to answer to me” then Harry’s friends are like “damn she’s spunky huh?” and Harry laughs and everyone laughs and this is how the book ends? How would it be funny? How would it be appropriate? How would it feel like “romance”? When Ron returns in The Silver Doe, he’s been psychologically tortured (”tortured” is the actual word JKR uses, please), we don’t need him to be hurting outside as well.

I want more accountability for Hermione. More “uh hey Hermione maybe don’t do that”. More “hey Hermione you know you think of yourself as a good person buuuut yeah actually if all good persons were like you I’d be very afraid”. More “Hermione please for the love of God educate yourself”. More “Hermione sweetie I love you, but you can’t actually learn everything from books”. CHARACTER. DEVELOPMENT. PLEASE. Don’t be afraid to punch Hermione down and tear her apart the way the best Ron fics maim and torture our poor boy. Just because Rowling treated Hermione with kiddy princess gloves doesn’t mean you have to mimic her.

So when Hermione does a genuinely shitty thing let her own up to it. When Ron is a victim let him be upset and angry, even if Hermione is the one treating him badly. Just because he loves her doesn’t mean he’s not allowed to be disappointed in her or that she’s entitled to his immediate forgiveness. Give Ron and Hermione equal consideration. If you’re brushing off Hermione’s actions but condemning Ron for the slightest mistake, I am sure to hate it.

Okay, uh, so, those aren’t really tropes. Those are more just, guidelines I presume.

Oh, yeah, a trope that annoys me! Ron saying “you’re mine”, “my Hermione” and stuff, and Hermione just swoons and says “yours” and shiz. Ok, once in a while, why not. Once in a while. BUTT. I WANT HERMIONE TO SAY IT TOO. “Mine”, “my Ron!” and Ron swoons and says “yours, absolutely yours”. DO IT YOU COWARDS. FUCKING TAKE THOSE GENDER ROLES AND PUNCH’EM IN THE FACE.

Oh, right, while we’re on the subject of gender roles! Dad!Ron is everything. SingleParent!Ron is mwaaah. Stay-at-home-Dad!Ron is ALKZLDSJDLQSKLFJ <3. AnimalLover!Ron is HHHHNNNGG. Remember, the small gestures, the tiniest, softest acts Ron does (helping Harry get dressed when his arm is deboned, giving Dobby his brand-new sweater, praising Ginny, Luna and Neville when they escaped Umbridge), those are often those unremarkable, unmistakeably kind and sweet actions that tell us who Ron really is at his core: not a guy who’d want power at all costs, not a guy who’d give it all for ambition, not a guy who sees people as possessions, but someone kind who wants to make others happy.

Ok, I was also asked for AUs, so, uh, pretty much every AU is game as long as Ron gets treated with respect? I mean I don’t really care for Mafia!AUs or such but if you can find a way to fit good Romione then go for it I guess. Royalty AU, yeah why not but I often see Ron being made a prince while Hermione is a poor wee servant girl and like. Uuum, we’re talking about the same characters here? Hermione the highly educated girl who keeps on walking over everyone’s toes and loudly talking about how things should be done and is definitely Nouveau Riche, Ron who is a country boy who lives on a farm and is lost in the constant shuffle of his brothers, you think she should be the peasant and he should be the royal? Whaddafack? Oh, and all the “Hermione is a Muggle, Ron is a wizard” AUs that start this way BUTT! Suddenly... Hermione... turns out... to be (wait for it!)... A WITCH! And a super powerful super talented very good one too!!!... yeah ok, yawn. It’s quite scary, actually, how often I’ve seen that plotline, but in the rare cases when it’s Muggle!Ron and Witch!Hermione, Ron never ever EVER (I mean, seriously, NEVER EVER) turns out to have been a wizard, not even a mediocre one, all along. No, when Ron is made a Muggle for the sake of AU he stays a Muggle. But when Hermione is made a Muggle she has to turn out TO HAVE BEEN A WITCH ALL ALONG OMYGAH. I can count on one hand the number of Mugglemione/Wizardron fics that actually stick to their Mugglemione premise till the end - and usually they’re one-shots. (Also I don’t mean “Ron mistakes Hermione for a Muggle because he meets her in the Muggle world and assumes he must hide his magic from her, oh wait she was actually a witch!” fics, I mean genuinely “Hermione has been raised a Muggle her whole life, never had weird things happen to her her whole life ever, then Ron comes in and is a wizard and he does magic and Hermione wonders what it’d be like to be a witch and oh surprise! Don’t worry Hermione, you won’t have to feel not-special or mundane for long, here comes the plot contrivance to tell you you really were in fact the specialest of them all!!” fics.) Fairytale!AU is cool. Very good. But honestly I like to see them swapped around. Ron cursed by a nasty fae to be a Beast and Hermione stumbling upon him? Neat, especially if you don’t go the boring route of “oh let’s just rehash the Disney/the original book with different names and call it a day”. But Hermione cursed by an asshole fae for, let’s say, not sharing books, turning into a Beast, and Ron stumbling upon her as she’s trying to survive in the woods (and not doing a very good job of it)? Yes, brava, chief’s kiss. Rapunzel AU where Hermione’s bushy hair turns into the most impractical, most suffocating improvised ladder ever for Ron? Hilarious. Rapunzel AU where Ron has A GIANT EFFING PONYTAIL OF THE GODS and is screaming “ow ow ow” as Hermione makes her way up to his window cringing and saying “sorry! sorry! sorry! (damn his hair smells good)” on every step? Equally hilarious. Go! Be creative! Please I beg of you

Creature!fics! Oh my god there’s not enough of those, at least that aren’t focused on a bullshit pairing! Soulmate AUs! Give me everything! I’ll even take A/B/O if you insist on making it Romione! That’s how far I’ve fallen from human decency I’ll take anything just give me some good Ron content please I beg of you (Ah and to those that are going to say “Alpha Ron Omega Hermione :)))” well yes, but actually no. “Beta Ron Beta Hermione”? “Beta Ron Alpha Hermione”? “Omega Ron Alpha Hermione”??? HELL YEAH NOW WE’RE TALKIN)

Oh dear god I’m still not finished and I haven’t gone through everything someone stop me.

AND NOW BE CAREFUL CHILDREN, BELOW WILL BE SMUT.

Okay I don’t know if it qualifies as a trope, but. But. A more realistic depiction of Ron is usually what I’m after. All those fanfics that have Ron be “the sexy experienced one ;)))” ravishing “naive virginal Hermione ;))” is just UGH. We spent all the 2000-2010 period having fics like this, mind adding a bit of EQUALITY to the mix???

It’s just... I hate it okay? So many fics read like they’re just projection, writers who are essentially making Ron their big strong sex toy stud who's so attentive and sweet and cherishing, and so it does indirectly ends up as "servant Ron is so devoted to his goddess Hermione, providing pleasure to her while she doesn’t have to lift a finger”. The Dom!SexGod!Ron thing honestly depresses me... Since it's Ron taking care of Hermione, AGAIN. Like, he spends his WHOLE LIFE doing that already. Can we give him a break for once?

In the endI feel that it's less "Romione smut" and more "self-inserting into Hermione smut". In "real" Romione smut I think Ron and Hermione would switch roles according to what they feel like. And honestly I ALWAYS picture Ron being super nervous during Dom stuff, like he spanks her once then immediately he goes "oh my god are you okay?? did that hurt, do you want to stop?", things like that. I cannot imagine it happening any other way. XD Ron is just... too caring, too sensitive to do stuff like hard BDSM and that kind of thing in my opinion. He’s too much of a caretaker. I understand if it’s your kink and you’re perfectly free to project and write the fic you want, I’m not the fun police, but it’s just... I don’t think that’s really what Ron would be like. I just want MORE realistic Ron.

Also I’m trying really really hard to not point fingers here but WHY is it that it’s always “Ron growled” while it’s always “Hermione whimpered” or “Hermione moaned”? Like... you know it’s okay for a man to moan or whimper in pleasure too, right?  You know Ron isn’t 110% muscles and testosterone? You know Hermione is allowed to be fierce too? Hermione can 100% “growl” and be dominant and pin Ron to the wall and reduce him to a puddle of goo if you’re brave enough?

(Honestly how sexy would Ron think that is? The woman he loves is half his size yet can pin him down and ravish him. DO YOU KNOW HOW LONG RON HAS WANTED TO BE RAVISHED AND CHERISHED DO YOU KNOW HE’S BEEN WANTING THIS ALL HIS LIFE)

Oooo-kay, so that’s... mostly it, I reckon. Oh also Ron has a gigantic penisraise kink (and a great penis too, but mostly a praise kink). That’s canon and that’s all.

[leia-imogen]

aaron & the family he's found all by himself; vol. 2 // vol. 1

( ft. short jokes, a belated birthday shopping trip, & an ultra-chaotic winter break )

( for @criswisstuff & anyone who enjoyed the first one <3 )

savannah, who is 5'9, is constantly teasing aaron and cleo for being short. katelyn's good at 5'6, and also a bit impossible to tease bcs she's the actual best, so she gets to escape this

cleo ( 5'2 ) is perfectly delighted to have someone shorter than her for once in her life, even by only 2 inches

aaron: guys, just try and see this from my point of view

sav: [ collapses ]

katelyn: [ crouches down ]

cleo: [ sits cross-legged on floor ]

aaron: dude you're literally 2 inches taller than me

cleo: 2 and a quarter

sav is so smug about this but in a good-natured way, in that she and cleo call aaron "kid" or "kiddo" or "pipsqueak" and he doesn't mind bcs they always say it w such a huge smile and he likes to respond to sav with "how's the weather up there, tall-ass?"

and katelyn thinks it's ridiculously adorable how tiny aaron is and obviously she uses him as an armrest all the time

katelyn, petting aaron's hair: guys guys omg he's like an angsty mini blond kitten and i would kill for him <3

sav, popping up between them: mini-yard :))

before i get super distracted, i just wanna mention that aaron met sav and cleo towards the end of november, so they missed the twin's birthday

but sav still insists that she must take him shopping bcs sure his fashion sense is fine but there's always room for improvement, isn't there, aaron??

he relents, so long as she and cleo and katelyn ( who already gave him a birthday present?? why's she doing this??? ) don't spend too much money

sav drags him all around south carolina to the best thrift stores she can find and cleo and katelyn are amazed that she can get such fantastic deals on the supermodel clothes she wears

fr she's literally a fashion design major ( + minoring in business management ) and she shows up to class in skilfully done drugstore makeup and an absolutely killer outfit for like 15 bucks

she grew up poor, and she's still poor now, even if she ( thankfully ) managed to scrape a cheerleading scholarship

sav, flicking through a rack of dresses labelled $4 apiece: RIP to little miss rich bitch reynolds but i'm different ;)

no hate to allison she's awesome but she grew up in the lap of luxury surrounded by designer brands so she knows NOTHING about thrifting and rationing money in general

oh and sav and allison have kind of a frenemies thing going on bcs they're both fighting for the top spot of their fashion design course

they spend the whole day shopping and aaron ends up with a highly upgraded wardrobe that contains a lot of cute pastel stuff and sav's promise to do his makeup

aaron insists on paying for dinner at the really nice pizza place a short drive from campus even tho they all protest

and andrew knows he's found new friends, but has no idea that it's the vixens and he's dating one of them. nicky does tho, but he's sworn to secrecy

nicky thinks his new clothes are adorable and is stunned when aaron tells him the total cost

"oh my GOD that girl sounds like a genius."

"yeah, her name's sav. you guys,, would get along, i think."

okay now for the winter break part!!

i think that you can get permission to stay at dorms if you're an international student or something??

anyways since sav's super upset bcs her father straight-up told her not to come home bcs he has a new girlfriend ( god i hate sav's father )

katelyn would stay with her, but her dad can finally have her home in new york for christmas and she really doesn't want to miss it

cleo, the only one with a properly functional family, is going back to her big family house and loving parents and grandma and aunt and siblings and cousins. love that for her.

so aaron and sav are stuck at psu for 2 weeks and aaron's surprisingly cool with this. and sav's excited bcs for the first time since her mom died, she can spend her christmas with someone she actually wants around instead of her shitty-ass father and his constant stream of bitchy girlfriends

they spend a lot of time together, stealing food from the athlete's dining hall to make their own weird combos, which usually ends with aaron making something Cool and Interesting and sav gagging and spitting out whatever strange concoction she had previously insisted would taste good

i literally can't bring myself to give a shit about the twinyards' deal bcs andrew literally became best friends with renee?? and hooks up with guys at eden’s??? idk what's going on there but it's like andrew is trying to control aaron's life while he can do whatever he wants??? and honestly wtf????

also let me just make it clear that i ADORE andrew so so much he's one of my favourite comfort characters ever but i'm not gonna make excuses for his shitty behaviour. i fully believe he heals and puts away his pride to apologise to aaron, nicky, and kevin for his treatment of them

that's definitely not to say that aaron's internalised homophobia isn't eww, but with so many important people in his life gay, he makes a huge effort to get over it

so andrew just thinks that aaron is spending a lot of time in the library or out with nicky or something

and when aaron tells sav about this deal, she's kinda horrified, but it's pretty clear to her that aaron so desperately wants to fix his relationship with his brother, and she's not in any place to discourage him, is she?

the only thing she can do is hope that he won't come out all the worse for it

and stare at the boy curled up on the other end of the pale pink sofa cleo's parents had gotten, wonder just how much shit he'd been put through, and decide she was going to be his best friend

aaron's face has gone entirely impassive. sav nudges his fluffy-socked foot with her own, then reaches out to smooth the crease between his eyebrows. "careful, you'll wrinkle your pretty little face."

aaron is very caught off guard by this, and very promptly flushes bright red, which contrasts with the pale teal hoodie he stole from katelyn

"okay, enough talk about depressing crap. wanna go make christmas cookies now?"

"yeah."

so they make christmas cookies. well, it was supposed to be christmas cookies, but it turns into double chocolate fudge cookies somewhere along the line. neither of them knows how

them baking together is the definition of chaos. they're still blasting songs, and sav is singing along terribly

"yOu'Re A mEaN oNe, Mr. GrInCh," while poking aaron's cheek as he tries to mix something. he throws a handful of flour at her. "yOu ReAlLy ArE A hEel."

anyways obviously sav retaliates and that ends in a flour fight. it only stops when aaron deadass cracks an egg on sav's head and she smears chocolate into his hair

she also tries to make him sing along to baby, it's cold outside

"i'Ve GoT tO Go `wAAyyy~" she holds a spatula up to his face

"go away."

they video call katelyn, who takes one look at the mess in the cramped dorm kitchen and sighs so loudly and dramatically that her dad pops in and asks if everything's okay

aaron freezes up at the sight of him and sav quickly turns off the camera, bcs they both want to make good impressions on him, and being covered in various cookie ingredients just won't cut it, ya know?

the cookies turn out delicious and sav sends all their group chat various photos of the process, most of which consist of selfies with her making goofy faces while aaron is simultaneously baking and flipping off the camera

plus a several videos of sav enthusiastically dancing and mouthing the lyrics of, as follows, all i want for christmas is you, let it snow, and santa claus is coming to town and aggressively pointing a spatula at aaron

"c'mon aari, just sing! please??? please???? please you can do it i believe in you!!"

finally he just. gives up. "okay, you know what? fine, i'll sing to ONE and then you will STOP bothering me you insolent dumbass."

sav beams. santa baby starts playing. aaron is very clearly going through five stages of grief in 0.5 seconds

"go on," sav says sweetly as she slides in next to a pouting aaron, "i'll sing with you."

sav slings an arm around his shoulder and sways with him, so it's just her doing that and him grumpily mumbling the lyrics

and when the cookies are cooling down, they start cleaning the kitchen up. aaron rubs some spilled egg yolk into sav's hair but it goes pretty okay otherwise, since they're just listening to more christmas songs and chatting about light stuff, like aaron's biochem course, sav's fashion course, and their dumb classmates

aaron mostly listens tho, and learns that sav kind of hates allison reynolds for giving up her inheritance when she would do ANYTHING for even the tiniest fraction of that money

but she still thinks allison's gorgeous bcs c'mon

and that sav's dream is to one day open her own boutique!!

aaron spends most of the actual christmas day with the monsters at eden's bcs nicky and andrew wanted to

he spent a lot of the time texting on their group chat

doessavvyisgay: so u just go to a nightclub every week??

unaliveme: i mean yeah, i literally worked here for a while. we needed money and nicky was already working 2 jobs night and day

actualblessing: babe ur backstory is so tragic

unaliveme: i'm a fox for a reason ig

cleo.magda: Yes but-

doessavvyisgay renamed this conversation "aaron miniyard support group"

unaliveme: oh ffs

unaliveme: sav subject change go

doessavvyisgay: i'm at the clothes store what should i get?

actualblessing: something pretty :)

doessavvyisgay: sorry, i can't buy the cashier

cleo.magda: Wow.

doessavvyisgay: I DID GET HER NUMBER THO

unaliveme: lmaooo what's her name?

doessavvyisgay: uh

unaliveme: savannah istg u don't even know her name??

actualblessing: s a v

actualblessing: damn u really do be turning on the Charm tho

actualblessing: respect i didn't even talk to aaron till i asked him for notes bcs he has rly pretty notes and also a rly pretty face

actualblessing: and even then i was like :0

unaliveme: IT WAS CUTE I PROMISE

doessavvyisgay: u 2 = the only valid heterosexual couple

actualblessing: rt

unaliveme: oh shit i'm getting super drunk

cleo.magda: Aaron, you drink? That's not legal, get out of there right now. Kids these days-

unaliveme: cleo u have literally seen me get drunk af,, the first time we met,,, and anyways this is how my family bonds ✌🏻

doessavvyisgay: that's. so damn weird kiddo but go off ig

actualblessing: no go find better things to bond about other than alcohol and weird sweaty dancing

cleo.magda: Yeah, go watch some Christmas movies!

unaliveme: nicky makes us watch die hard every year

doessavvyisgay: see u in hell, kiddo ;)

cleo.magda: I meant things like The Polar Express and Home Alone.

actualblessing: merry christmas ya filthy animals!!

doessavvyisgay: merry xmas y'all i'm gonna go to that christmas party bcs i'm super bored

unaliveme: merry christmas mothers and fuckers

cleo.magda: Merry Christmas, you guys!

[lobotomy-maybe-bestie]

RQG for the music ask meme!!

1. Ghosting - Mother Mother

Probably Sasha as the sneakiest, the invisble one in the party, leaving her home, leaving London and then eventually leaving the entire world, but still haunting the memory of the party as they make their way through the destroyed remains of Other London

I've been ghosting, I've been ghosting alone

Ghost in the world, ghost with no home

I mean this was basically her whole life until finding a home in Ancient Rome. No I'm not getting emotional about Sasha again ;_;

2. Morton's Fork - Typhoon

Ok so this is unfortunate because I have that song from an RQG playlist. It's peak "Guard the pack so you that you will succeed together" "Taking a spear for Sasha" "Volunteering for the first night watch in Damascus even though he hasn't slept for 48 hours" Grizzop drik acht Amsterdam.

I won't lie to you, it will be painful

It's in your nature to fear what is natural

I mean just-

We are alone in this together

All alone in this together

Just-

I haven't slept in several nights and I'm not tired

Who protects the ones I love when I'm asleep?

Though there's little I can do, I say a prayer

That when the wolves come for their share

They'll come for me

Yeah. Pretty much.

3. High Hopes - Panic! At the Disco

S1 Amelia Earhart definitely. This song has crazy airship trick vibes.

4. 21 Guns - Green Day

It's angsty enough to fit the whole campaign I reckon but I don't know any specifics.

5. Loose Ends - Imogen Heap

Zolf and Hamid.

It's complicated

This time I think it could be

Triangulated

It could be just what we need

So what do you say, we give it up and walk away?

We're overrated anyway

Need I say more?

Not now, not ever, no, it's never a good time

How will the good times ever roll on?

Comparing photos then and now, now and then

Just wondering where it all went wrong

Just... ouch.

6. Little In The Middle - Milow

Ohhhh okay this song gives me Hamid vibes. It's specifically about a child's dream to join a circus but like...

For the fun and death defying

But in time you forgot life is small in the big top

And your dreams were slowly dying

What you wanted was not a crime

You could have done it

Hamid with his dreams of becoming a wizard which were shattered only for him to be plunged into a terrifying and wonderful adventure that makes him develop a new dream, of being a Hero.

Lions leap through hoops of fire

As the acrobats go flying

But what's the show all about

When did your north get turned to south

And the truth turned to lying

Only for the story to get darker and darker, he loses his sister, he loses his friends, he loses the world. He is more powerful than he could have EVER imagined but it comes at the cost of having to save the world and being ready to sacrifice everything he has.

Always just a little in the middle

It keeps your head from spinning round

And the party around him who are so much more pragmatic! We just saw it again, Cel closing the door because they knew that it was more important to protect the lab than to ensure they can all survive. Hamid really is just a little guy in the middle of everything and it makes me feel so sorry for him!!

7. Atlas Hands - Benjamin Francis Leftwich

It makes me think about Cel's old life. Like when they were living with their husband and his kids? Actually maybe it's that specific scene in the Garden of Yerlick where he appears and they tell him all about what happened since he died.

I will remember your face

Cause I am still in love with that place

But when the stars are the only things we share

Will you be there?

Like just that quiet reassurance there that they still love and remember him? It makes me feel something.

I've got a plan, I've got an atlas in my hands

I'm gonna turn when I listen to the lessons I've learned

Also these lines are very Cel. They're old! They've seen a lot! They've travelled the whole world! And now they're saving it!

8. Cough Syrup - Young The Giant

Early Sasha, definitely. It's about the "I don't have anything to lose", "I just need to get away"

If I could find a way to see this straight

I'd run away

The party being an opportunity for her. Protection, sure, but also a way out and, maybe more importantly, a reason to go. A goal that isn't just "escape".

9. Carrying Cathy - Ben Folds

Alright, so I thought "Haha it's about Wilde bc he sucks so bad at combat that the party has to carry him all the time" and then I thought some more about it and got very, very sad.

So obsessed was I and self-absorbed that I

Didn't see that she was crying

In Paris, when the party was fleeing and treated Wilde like absolute shit (like okay they saved his life but they treated him a little like they treat Barrett now). Especially told from Zolf's perspective to highlight how CLOSE they are now.

And she's different when it's just me and her, and I

After the whole party disappears and Zolf and Wilde found each other. How close they grew in that 18 months but also the fact that Wilde judged himself effectively useless except to do paperwork (tbf he was right and also very good at paperwork but still... ouch)

But to imagine a fall

With no one at all to catch you

There'd always been someone

And then he falls off the ship and dies. And they carry him again, in the hope he may be resurrected.

10. Purpose - The Late Night Call

This song is very Endgame lol. Everyone aware that they might need to sacrifice themselves and trying to find something good in that.

[petri808]

1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | 16 | 17 | 18 | 19 | 20 | 21 | 22 | 23 | 24 | 25 | 26 | 27 | 28 | 29 | 30-Epilogue

*Trigger warning- panic attack. The next 4 chapters will stay completely angsty as well, but I swear the ride will get us to a happy ending. Due to feedback, I agree that I need to show the trauma and progression to heal.

Thank you to @mcornilliac​ for your invaluable input, it’s really gonna help bring the story fully to life :) 

“Lucy, baby,” Natsu’s hand squeezed harder. “You gotta calm down.”

“Ma’am... ma’am,” the EMT snapped his fingers in front of Lucy’s face. “Ma’am, I need you to focus on me. Can you focus on me?”

Their words were just muffled static, barely any tone and definitely not comprehensible to Lucy for there was too much competition vying for attention flowing through her mind. It felt like standing in a rapid wave break of constant ebb and flow but pounding against her prone body flattened into the shoreline. The thoughts raced so quickly, screaming, with only the harshest words coming through like a foghorn in the blackest night. Death. Pain. Blood. Anger, along with the emotional turmoil that came with them. Each rushing wave of anxiety fueled irrational thought after thought. ‘Stupid, stupid girl! Such a selfish fool! This was your fault for stealing away someone else’s love, a fantasy home wrecker! Fuck that! Natsu was mine fair and square, damn it! I deserved Natsu just as much and he loved me! Not Touka! Me!!!’ Lucy’s mind screamed, but the stares ate away... All those eyes judging her as they took that walk of shame. The authorities, the neighbors, heaven help her the talk that’s bound to get around. Will there be whispered, and hushed tones muttered around her, bearing down with all the weight of a thousand gravitational forces?! It was too much! Too mu—

“Oww!!” Lucy screamed and yanked her hand back, as she felt a sharp stab on the back of her hand. “What the fuck did you do that for?!” She glared at the EMT while rubbing and nursing the angry red spot. Whatever the man had done had hurt, but aside from the pain, nothing broke through the skin.

Without missing a beat, the EMT merely retook Lucy’s hand and placed two fingers over the pulse point in her wrist. “Can you tell me your name?” He questioned, speaking in a soft tone.

“Of course, I can! It’s Lucy Heartfilia!”

“Mmhmm,” he uttered in response. His eyes stayed trained on his own watch. “Do you know where you are?”

“In a fucking ambulance!”

“And who’s the current prime minister?”

“Huh? Um,” she paused with her head slightly tilted, “it was Abe, but I don’t remember the new guys name.”

“Close enough. Your pulse is still high, but it’s coming down now.” The EMT let go of Lucy’s hand, talking as he continued working on things. “I’m sorry to use such a technique, but when a person is in a panic attack, we need to snap them out of it as quickly as possible to keep it from escalating. Basically, during an attack your mind goes on overload, but physical stimulation can halt it. Shocks, if you will, to snap your focus away from cognitive thoughts back to the physical reality. The questions were to check if your cognitive focus had returned.”

“Oh...” was all Lucy could respond with to all the jargon. She hadn’t even realized she was having a panic attack. “T-Thank you...” But she wondered for a moment, just some physical pain could stop all those bad thoughts? It was something she’d never known before.

“You’re welcome. There are other methods including those you can administer to yourself at the immediate onset, so I suggest you look into them in case of another attack.”

“You think she’ll have more?” Natsu questioned with an obvious mix of concern and curiosity. The whole thing happened so quickly, that by the time he’d registered how bad it was, he couldn’t even react to a stranger stabbing a pen into his girlfriend’s hand. He was annoyed but glad this EMT was able to stay completely focused and calm.

“Traumatic events can cause a lot of emotional reactions including panic attacks. So, it’s a good idea to be prepared just in case.” The EMT now injected her arm, explaining as he went. “This is a mild sedative just to help you relax.”

By the time they’d reached the hospital, the sedative was taking effect and Lucy struggled to keep her eyes open. The level of exhaustion blindsided them both. Physically exhausted as if she’d run a marathon and emotionally drained. The closest she could rationalize it to was studying for the college entrance exam and how tired she’d been once it was over. So, she sat quietly as the medical personnel double checked her wounds, but too dazed to pay attention when they were giving her aftercare instructions. Thank goodness for Levy who’d been waiting as soon as they’d arrived. The woman handled a lot of the talking for Lucy and Natsu, but Natsu himself was being worked on next to Lucy. His wounds were cleaned up better so they could get a closer look.

The doctors inform Lucy she’s free to go but Natsu would have to stay so they could run X-rays. She wanted to fight to stay because right now he was the closest thing to security she had but could barely focus. With some gentle coaxing from both Natsu and Levy, and reminders that Touka wasn’t getting out of jail, Lucy eventually relents. A police officer would be escorting the women back to their apartment.

“Just try to get some sleep, please,” Natsu kissed his girlfriend. “I promise to call you as soon as I can, but I might pass out as soon as I hit my bed.” He wanted to be honest with her but assuring at the same time.

“O-Okay,” she nodded slowly, glassy eyed from exhaustion and sadness. “I understand.”

He leaned his head to her forehead while cupping the back of her neck. “We’re gonna be okay, Lucy. We’re gonna get through this, and I’ll be there for you no matter how long it takes.”

That pulls a few sniffles out of the woman who closes her eyes. “I love you, Natsu.”

“I love you too, Lucy.” He sits back up. “Now promise me you’ll get some sleep?” She nodded. Natsu smiled. “That’s my girl.”

Gray arrived shortly after the two women left for the night to keep his friend company and help him get home. Natsu wasn’t keeping track of time, but it sure felt like this was taking forever. The police had taken both he and Lucy’s phones for evidence, so he had nothing to pass the time with. Luckily, there wasn’t a lot of downtime between treatments. After the X-ray, the doctors sedated him and sewed up the wounds on his cheek and abdomen. It took both internal and external sutures, but luckily the side wound didn’t hit anything major. According to the doctor, the knife had missed the large intestine by a centimeter. He’ll be left with nasty scars for life, but a life is one he’ll at least have.

“You okay, man?” Gray questioned.

“Just tired and sore,” Natsu sighed. Now that Lucy wasn’t there, he let his body and mind fully register all the physical pain he was going through. “I just wanna fall into my bed.”

The doctors told Natsu, he should fully heal in about six to eight weeks, pending he keep the wound clean, keep his health up, and above all did nothing to aggravate it. So much for working, but he was sure that Makarov will make an exception. Maybe put him on register, light stocking, and inventory with no heavy lifting. As for how bad the scars will be, only time will tell. Plastic surgery might help, but that costs money. In a fleeting thought, Natsu worried that Lucy would leave him over it. ‘No way, she’s not vain like that... although the reminder it gives might be the problem...’ he quickly dismissed the notion from conscious thought, even though it lingered in the background. It would certainly hurt if she did, but could he really blame her? To be reminded of the night she almost died every time she looked at him? Natsu wanted to believe that Lucy was strong enough to get through this, and regardless if things eventually didn’t work out between them, he’d never stop trying to help her. He owed her that much for putting her in this situation. Well... that wasn’t fair, he couldn’t have foreseen Touka’s behavior, but it didn’t make him feel any less guilty for it.

“We’re here.”

Grays voice snapped Natsu out of his thoughts. He looked out of the taxi window to see the front of their apartment building. “Oh, right.” He was so ready to clean up and sleep.

Inside their apartment, Natsu took a shower, and Gray helped him to re-bandage his wounds. The warm water and sensation of being clean helped him to feel a little better, at least physically, even though the emotional turmoil still churned. But as he laid in bed, the exhaustion was swiftly taking over. There was so much to do. Replace their phones, the official police interview, notifying their jobs and schools to make sure they wouldn’t fall behind. Even the EMT’s comment was nagging at him, so note to self, call the shrink in the morning... well, as soon as he woke up anyways. By the time his eyes were shuttering closed, the early breach of dawn had made its calling. It was a new day and all Natsu could hope was to start anew.

[cherrybracelets]

crybaby

dean winchester x fem!reader / word count: 1.8k

warnings: mentions of tattoos, needles, blood. swearing. no smut. just dumb mutual pining and hand holding and tattooing

song inspo: crybaby by lil peep (i recommend listening before or during!)

an: thanks for my first dean request @herfalsegod i kind of tweaked this a bit and made it a bit more angsty i hope you like it <3 no spoilers or spn context is needed here! no set timeline in the spn universe either!

“I can’t have this conversation with you again, (Y/N),” Dean lectured, throwing his back down on the cheap motel bed, a pile of dust filling the air as it hit the blanket. 

“Dean, you’re kind of being a little over dramatic,” you responded, rolling your eyes flirtatiously, biting slightly on your lip. 

“That’s like the third time this month you almost got possessed. You have to get the tattoo. I’m serious.” It was a conversation you’d had time and time again, him telling you how dumb it was to not have the anti possession tattoo with the amount of exorcisms you’d been doing lately. You were asking to get hurt, he always said. You were being dumb. 

“Dean, you’re not in charge of me. In fact, didn’t you come to me for help with this hunt?” 

“Yeah, everyone said you were one of the best. I almost believed it, too.” 

“Almost?” You chuckled, shaking your head in frustration at him. 

“I just don’t think anyone could be that good of a hunter if you’re afraid of needles. How are you supposed to fight demons if you’re such a crybaby?” 

That hurt. That made you angry. The fact was, you had saved Dean’s crybaby ass about a hundred times since you started hunting together, and for him to say that to you just because you didn’t want a stupid tattoo… 

“Fine. Let’s go then.” You grabbed your jacket and started towards the door, determined to prove to Dean you were tough enough.

“You’re serious?” He laughed, rolling his eyes as if he didn’t believe you. 

“I’ll go with or without you, either way I’m not gonna stand around and listen to you insult me anymore,” you snapped, crossing your arms over your chest and refusing to look at him. But you could sense him pouting, his tough exterior breaking down a bit as you yelled. 

“Well, you can’t just walk into any shop and get it done. It needs to be done perfectly. I know a guy a few towns over who can do it. I’ll take you,” he offered, grabbing his keys off the nightstand and heading towards the door. Although you wanted to turn him away, keep up the angry facade you had created, you were secretly grateful he was coming. You were nervous, and there was no shot you could do this alone without crying or passing out. 

You didn’t speak for most of the car ride, still refusing to look at him, just staring out the window. He kept looking over to you, as if he wanted to say something, but couldn’t come up with the right words. 

Finally he spoke up, turning down his music just a moment before he opened his mouth. 

“I didn’t mean to be a dick, (Y/N). I don’t think you’re not tough… in all honesty, I think you’re way tougher than me. I just… don’t want to see you get hurt, I guess.” He brought his hand to his face, rubbing his jaw as he turned the words over in his head. He didn’t want you to get hurt. It would kill him to see you get hurt. 

“I know, Dean. I’m being stupid… it’s just a stupid tattoo, right? It can’t be that bad,” you smiled, looking up towards him, realizing now just how much you missed looking at his face. How much happier and calmer you felt knowing he was right beside you. 

“Yeah, it wasn’t too bad at all. Somewhere between a bee sting, and like… being stabbed?” He smiled, winking deviously at you. 

“Oh shut up! Do you want me to get the fucking tattoo or not?” You slapped his arm playfully, the two of you laughing obnoxiously over the sound of the radio as his car sped through the dark streets. 

“Well, we’re pulling in now, so you don’t have much of a choice anymore,” he informed, raising his eyebrows in anticipation as he found a place to park. 

You felt your head starting to spin and your heart racing as he took the keys out of the ignition, your hands shaking as you started to get out of the car. Dean could sense your change in mood, your body language screaming out for help. He ran over to your side of the car, putting his arm around you and grabbing you tightly. 

“Oh, c’mon, sunshine. It really isn’t that bad, I promise. And I’ll hold your hand the entire time. It’ll be over before you know it,” he assured you, the warmth of his body grounding you. His touch was always enough to bring your head back home from the clouds. 

“I’m ready. Let’s go,” you nodded, affirming to him you were going to be okay. He smiled down to you, nodding slightly in response. 

He walked ahead of you into the shop, smiling as he greeted his friend behind the desk. They had a quick and quiet conversation, making sure their words were only heard between the two of them. After a few minutes of talking, they both nodded and walked in opposite directions, Dean walking back towards you. 

“You ready?” 

“As I’ll ever be…” 

You followed Dean and the tattoo artist to a private room, having you lay down on a padded table with Dean sitting in a chair next to you. 

“It’s nice to meet you, (Y/N). I’m Sean, and I am going to be tattooing you today. Have you ever had a tattoo before?” He looked like one of the most intimidating people you’d ever seen in your entire life- and you’d come face to face with demons. But, his voice was so kind and reassuring, you instantly felt better.

“I haven’t. And I’m a little nervous, to be honest,” you frowned, not wanting to sound super lame in front of Sean. 

“Hah! I remember how nervous Dean was when he got his first piece. Almost threw up right here on this bed,” Sean cackled. The thought of a nervous Dean made you giggle as well, which you tried desperately to hide. 

“Don’t listen to him, (Y/N)... I was fine,” Dean responded, denying any allegations of him being scared. 

“Ah, sure, whatever you say buddy. We’ll act like you didn’t shed a few tears that day, too…” 

“Oh… a crybaby?!” You looked up at Dean, who was avoiding your eye contact at all costs. You could swear a quiet blush crept up on his cheeks, the first time you’d ever seen Dean embarrassed in your entire friendship. You grabbed onto his hand, intertwining your fingers with his. His hands were warm, and surprisingly soft. You had always imagined his hands would be rough, worn, tired. Why had you thought so much about what his hands felt like? 

“Don’t worry, Dean. I will definitely cry. And I’m tougher than you, remember?” You giggled, finally grabbing his attention. Your touch was enough. It was always enough to bring his head back home from the clouds. He smiled down at you, a loving smile and warm eyes, ones that you would’ve lost yourself in if Sean hadn’t broken through your daze. 

“You ready?” 

“Mhmm,” you nodded, slipping your arm out of the sleeve of your shirt, revealing a bit of your bare chest. Not too much, but enough to make Dean shift in his chair, goosebumps forming on his flesh. He had never seen so much of you… he had never realized how beautiful your skin was, how much he desired to see more. 

You were still holding onto his hand, Sean turning his machine on, the loud noise breaking through any anxious thoughts you had. You turned towards Dean as he started tattooing, furrowing your brows as the needle began to pierce your skin. It wasn’t as uncomfortable as you thought it would be, helping you relax after the first few minutes. 

“It’s not too bad, actually,” you shrugged, Dean still staring at your chest. 

“Hmm? Sorry?” He said, shaking his head uncomfortably as he brought his eyes back to you. 

“You okay?” You giggled, wincing a bit as the pain got a little worse. 

“Yeah, just zoned out, that’s all. Sorry. I’m here,” he smiled, squeezing your hand reassuringly. 

“Thank you, Dean. For taking care of me.” You were feeling exceptionally grateful for him at the moment, your heart overwhelmed with love for the man that pushed you to be safe, that wouldn’t stop until you took care of yourself.  

“I won’t… I can’t let anything happen to you,” he whispered. You tried to think of something to say in response, but the tattoo needle was getting closer to your collarbone, and the pain made your brain unable to say anything else. 

You made casual conversation with Sean until he finished, which only took about another 20 minutes. When he finally added the last detail, he turned the machine off and smiled proudly at your. 

“All done, kid!” He gave you a thumbs up before grabbing a mirror and showing the final result. 

“Oh, wow!” you responded, grateful it was finally over. Sean cleaned it up and explained the aftercare to you, making Dean promise that you would take care of it until it healed. 

“If it doesn’t heal right, it could scar, and then the anti possession property won’t work right. You don’t want to have to do this all over again, right?” 

“No, sir,” you laughed, shaking your head and promising to take care of it. Dean paid Sean in cash, said their goodbyes, and the two of you walked outside and to his car together. 

“So? Not too bad, right?” Dean asked as he began unlocking the car. 

“Not at all. And it’s kind of badass. Kind of hot, right?” You giggled, opening the passenger door and sitting comfortably in the seat.

“Oh, yeah… yeah, totally hot,” Dean responded, an awkward tone hung in his voice. 

“Oh, don’t be weird about it. Your tattoo is hot. Tattoos are hot.” 

“You think I’m… it’s hot?” Dean was blushing again. Two times in one night? Almost impossible. 

“Yeah. Super hot,” you nodded, feeling a sudden layer of tension hanging in the air. 

“Can I try something?” Dean asked, awaiting your permission for whatever it was he was planning. 

“Uh, sure?” You shrugged, slightly nervous about what you just agreed too. 

And then Dean wrapped his soft hands around your face, pulling you towards him and kissing you softly. His lips held the taste of cheap beer and mint gum, which he incessantly chewed to curb his cigarette habit. A habit he only quit after he met you. 

He kissed you gently at first, not sure how you would respond to him. But you kissed him back, kissed him harder, your hands pulling his face into yours. You could feel him smiling as you kissed, happiness overwhelming both of you as you were finally able to admit how you felt. And how much you had just wanted to make out. 

“I do think your tattoo looks really, really hot,” he whispered, his lips trailing kisses down your neck. 

[fruitquake]

here’s the third and final part of that very angsty Thing™ (read the other parts here)

-

Remus opened his eyes to a familiar face - and a familiar pain searing through his body. He grimaced, clutching his ribs where the pain seemed to be worst.

“Hey, you’re awake.” James and Peter were sitting beside him. “How are you feeling?”

Remus glared at them both. “What are you doing h…” He trailed off, seeing the looks on their faces:

Peter was a nervous wreck, but that was not the most unusual thing, but James… James was usually the most cheerful and optimistic of them all, preferring to use jokes and humor even in tough situations, but now he was all but cheerful. In fact, he looked… scared? Remus had never seen him genuinely scared before.

“What’s wrong?” he asked frantically, sitting up in bed. It hurt like hell, but he didn’t care. 

James put a hand on his shoulder. “Remus, it’s not your fault,” he said. “I- I told him to stay away, but he didn’t listen…”

Sirius. Where was Sirius? Remus recalled something: Sirius besides him as the transformation began and he started to lose control… 

“What happened?” he asked again, pushing the words past a lump in his throat. “Sirius? Is he hurt? Is he…” The thought was too much to bear.

“He’s alive,” James hurried to tell him. “But we don’t know how bad it is. Madam Pomfrey won’t let us see him.”

Remus took in a shaky breath. “Fuck,” he whispered. “This is all my fault.”

James shook his head. “You can��t blame yourself-”

“No, James, it is my fault,” Remus persisted. Tears were forming in his eyes: he did nothing to stop them. “I pushed him away, I thought I was doing the right thing but I… I could’ve killed him.” 

Before he could register it was happening, James’ arms were around him, pulling him into a warm hug. “No,” he said. “It isn’t your fault. No matter how you look at it. Stop that, Moony.”

Remus couldn’t remember when he’d last been hugged like this - or at all. He hadn’t let anyone, not even the other marauders, close to him like this in ages, even before the break-up. First came the tears, rolling down his cheeks, but it didn’t take long before he was sobbing uncontrollably into James’ shoulder. 

“Shh, it’s okay,” James said, hugging him tighter. “He’s gonna be okay.” He didn’t sound convinced himself, but Remus tried to believe him. He had to. Otherwise how could he ever forgive himself?

The atmosphere in the hospital wing that day was worse than Remus had ever experienced it. The sitting and waiting to find out something, anything. His friends kept telling him to get some rest, but how could they possibly expect him to sleep? No, as he sat in the uncomfortable bed, James and Peter on either side, all he could think about was Sirius. How terrible he’d been to him. And now… what if he would never get a chance to make it up to him?

It must have been hours before Madam Pomfrey approached the three of them. James had been sitting down slumped over, probably dozing off, but leapt to his feet as soon as she came near them. 

“How is he?” he asked, eyes wide, scared, behind his smudged glasses.

Madam Pomfrey offered a smile Remus couldn’t quite decode. Was it meant to be reassuring, comforting, sympathetic? “You can see him now,” she said. “But you must be very quiet, he needs to rest.”

Heart and mind racing, Remus got out of bed, rather clumsily. If not for James being there to support him, he would’ve fallen. 

Seeing Sirius was like getting stabbed in the chest. Sirius, usually so full of life, was hardly recognizable as he laid there, covered in bloodied bandages. Remus hated himself more than he’d ever hated anyone before.

“I’ll leave you boys for a moment,” Madam Pomfrey said quietly.

James pulled over a chair and sat down next to Sirius’ bed. Peter did the same, but Remus couldn’t get himself to move any closer. This was his fault. It was all his fault. 

“I’m sorry,” he whispered hoarsely, shaking his head from side to side. He wanted to hold Sirius and never let go, but at the same time, he wanted to get as far away from all of them as possible, so they would never have to look at him again. The second option seemed like the best one to Remus. He turned around, leaving his friends, and hopefully the guilt, behind. 

The guilt did not stay behind. James could tell Remus that it wasn’t his fault all he wanted but he didn’t understand. He had pushed Sirius away, pushed all of his friends away, really. His stupidity had almost cost Sirius his life. 

“Remus?”

Remus froze in his tracks, quickly wiping away the tears. He’d forgotten there was going to be other people in the hallways and suddenly he noticed all the students looking weirdly at him… to his horror, he realized he was still wearing the hospital pajama he’d been sleeping in. Shit, this really was like that nightmare of going to school without pants on…

The voice who had called out to him belonged to Lily. With a concerned look in her eyes she grabbed his arm and pulled him gently to the side. 

“Are you okay?” she asked.

Remus nodded, but doubted that would do much to convince her. “I’m just… trying to get to class,” he said, but his voice came out all hoarse and scratchy. 

Lily looked at him with sympathetic eyes. “Let’s go to the common room,” she said. “There won’t be any people at this time of day.”

She was right, the common room was empty except for two 4th years skipping class, playing chess in a corner. 

Lily sat him down at one of the red armchairs by the fire. “I heard something happened to Sirius,” she said quietly. “Is he okay?”

Remus felt his chest clench up until he couldn't breathe. He didn’t want to think about Sirius. He couldn’t… 

“And are you okay?” Lily added. “Did you spend the night in the hospital wing?”

There was so much of this Remus couldn’t tell Lily. She didn’t know about him being a werewolf, and surely she would think he was a monster, especially after hearing what he did to Sirius. 

Remus swallowed past the lump in his throat. “I’m fine.”

Lily didn’t believe him - he hadn’t expected her to - but she left the matter alone. “You look like you need rest,” she said. “And a change of clothes.”

Again, Remus became uncomfortably aware of the hospital clothes he was wearing. He nodded quietly.

“Alright, I’ll leave now then,” Lily said, giving his arm a gentle squeeze. “Take care, Remus.”

Lily was right. Remus really needed to rest. Once he had made his way up the staircase and into the boys’ dormitory, he didn’t even have the energy to change clothes before collapsing onto his bed.

-

“Let’s try not to wake up Moony, kay?”

“Yeah, alright.”

A second later, the sound of something being knocked over stirred Remus from his half-sleep state, followed by James’ voice: “For fucks sake, Peter.”

Remus sat up in bed, pulling back the curtains. James and Peter were alone. Of course they were. Sirius was still in the hospital wing.

“Hey, you’re here,” James said. “Good… We were kinda worried when you ran off like that.”

Remus didn’t know what to say, so he stayed silent. How long had he been asleep? It seemed the sun was starting to set…

“Sirius asked about you,” James told him, and Remus’ head immediately shot up.

“What? He’s awake?” 

James did a mix between shrugging and shaking his head. “Well, he was. But barely,” he explained. “But I think he would really have appreciated you being there.”

Remus felt a pang of guilt, which he immediately shook away. “He shouldn’t want me anywhere near him,” he mumbled. 

“Well, he does,” James said. “And honestly? I don’t think there’s much you can do to change that. So maybe you should get over yourself and be there for him when he needs you. At least as a friend.” The last two lines were spoken quite harshly, yet Remus could tell by James’ eyes that it came from a place of love and caring. 

He sighed, fiddling with the hem of his blanket. 

After a while where neither of them spoke, James seemed to give up on talking to him. “Well,” he said. “Just get some rest for now, aight?”

-

The invisibility cloak was on the floor, right by James’ bed. Remus had been staring at it for what felt like hours, waiting for his roommates to fall asleep when suddenly, he couldn’t wait any longer. He leapt up, grabbed the cloak and pulled it around him, making sure he was all covered up, before leaving for the hospital wing.

The common room was empty, as were the hallways, which meant getting there was the easy part. No the hard part was convincing himself to actually go in, as he stood in front of the doors leading to the hospital wing. Would Sirius even want to see him? What James had said had probably just been a lie to cheer up Remus. Why would Sirius want anything to do with him after everything he’d done?

Despite all this, Remus carefully pressed down the doorknob and opened the door, grateful that it didn’t creak like most of the older doors in the castle. The hospital wing was almost empty, except for a few sleeping patients. And Sirius, of course… Once again, seeing him made Remus’ chest tighten, but this time he didn’t run: instead, he quietly sat down next to him, making sure the curtains were drawn by before pulling off the cloak. 

Sirius was still asleep, and still covered in bandages which were red from blood, yet Remus thought he looked a little better than he had that morning. Still, though, he didn’t look like himself has he laid there, all pale, arms hanging lifeless by his side. Remus took one of his hands and held it with both of his own. His skin was so warm…

“Sirius,” Remus whispered, careful not to alert Madam Pomfrey of his presence. “I… fuck, where do I even start?” 

He felt the tears again, but didn’t bother wiping them away.

“I’m so sorry.” That felt like a good place to start. “I should never have pushed you away like that. You… you’re the best thing that ever happened to me, and I threw that away.” He looked down at Sirius’ hand in his. “If I could go back in time and do it all again, I would never had hurt you like that. I would never have said those things. I guess I was just… scared? Yeah, I was scared. I’m not sure what I was scared of… That you would get tired of me, or realize you could do better? Or perhaps that you wouldn’t realize… I just wanted what was best for you, and that’s definitely not me, but…” He bit his lip, looking at Sirius. Despite his pale, feverish skin, and the bandages covering his wounds, he was beautiful. “You mean the fucking world to me,” Remus said. “I just want you to be happy. I’d do anything for you to just be happy, because… because I love you.” It felt so good to say. 

“I love you too.” Sirius’ voice was rough like sandpaper and barely more than a whisper, but the corner of his mouth was turned up into a smile. 

Once the surprise had died down, Remus felt joy and relief bubble in his stomach. “Sirius! You’re awake.”

Sirius opened his eyes. Those grey eyes, bright as the star he was named after. “Ha, I heard your whole emotional confession,” he teased. “That’s a bit embarrassing for you.” 

He tried to sit up, scrunching up his face in pain.

“Oi, careful!” Remus placed a hand on his shoulder, gently pushing him down again. Even after Sirius had obliged and was lying down, Remus kept the hand on his shoulder. “Do you…” he hesitated. Sirius gave him a questioning look, so he went on with the question: “Do you remember what happened?”

Sirius nodded. “Well,” he said. “I remember some of it.”

“I’m sorry,” Remus said. “I hurt you pretty bad…”

“Please don’t apologize.” Sirius put his hand over Remus’, giving it a light squeeze. “It’s really not your fault. I should’ve used my brain.”

“Don’t you think that’s an unfair demand to make of you?” Remus teased. 

Sirius laughed, then groaned in pain. “Anyway,” he said after a moment. “Let’s put all that behind us, ‘kay?”

Remus nodded. They were both silent for a while, not wanting to ruin the moment. Finally, Remus spoke: “You should get some rest,” he said. 

Sirius looked up at him with wide eyes. “Please don’t go.” He scooted over in bed, leaving a small space, which he patted, still looking at Remus. “C’mere?”

It was a terrible idea. Madam Pomfrey could come any moment to check on Sirius and she really wouldn’t be happy to find Remus there. “Pads, we shouldn’t,” Remus said with a sigh, though he already knew Sirius and his pleading puppy-eyes had won. 

Carefully, he got into bed, filling out the little space next to Sirius, just as Sirius had done so many times for him. He put his arms around him, and Sirius rested his head on Remus’ chest, where a warm, glowing feeling was spreading. 

Tomorrow, he would certainly get in trouble when madam pomfrey found them together in the bed that was too small for both of them, but that didn’t matter right now. The only thing that mattered in that moment was him and Sirius, together. 

[laceymorganwrites]

Is it snake of snack (14)

Word count: 2,217

Pairing: Daishou x fem!reader

Warnings: child abuse, self harm, childhood trauma, anxiety/panic attack, swearing, hurt and comfort, Bokuto is a good friend

A/N: this is basically just an angsty dragged out chapter of the last one, please read the warnings and skip this if you´re triggered by any of this. 

Listen to: Dying in a hot tub - Palaye Royale

Taglist: @samuthots @doggonudez @pepperful-qt @sandwitchsthings

Daishou didn´t mean to send that last text… he really didn´t. He always kept his feelings to himself. And for a good reason, he didn´t want to bother anyone else with it.

Besides, from his experience, nobody even cared. And you only told people what they wanted to hear. That was what he got taught.

Or rather punched into him by his father, the same man who yelled at him that he should disappear, that he couldn´t do anything right, that he was a waste of breath and that he should shut up at all times or next time he wouldn´t make it out alive.

His mind was a dark place, he knew this and tried to avoid it at all costs, he found healthy coping mechanisms with you, you were also the only person he trusted with his inner thoughts.

After your break up however, he reverted back to his old self, closing off and falling into the oh so familiar path of self deprecation and destruction.

He hasn´t cut himself in a while, not even scratched, but he could feel the itch in his skin, right underneath those ugly scars, which were signs of weakness. Daishou knew that it was unhealthy and bad, he knew that he shouldn´t do it, that he was truly fucked up to do so.

But then again, he was fucked up enough already before, so why stop when it helped? Even if only for an instance?

Current pain inflicted by himself was much better than reappearing suppressed memories that cut deeper than any blade ever could.

The good thing was that he could control the depth of the wound, he felt oddly safe when cutting, hyper fixating was always the thing that helped most, yet it was also the most dangerous thing to him.

Especially when he got so deep into his mind that he couldn´t possibly get out of it alone.

“Alright, I´m going to the bar with you!” he announced after hurriedly throwing on something to make him look presentable and leaving his room to join the others.

Kuroo was nervous, Daishou could tell, he also knew that he tried to hide his crush on their neighbor and bartender, but never pressed the matter.

“You look good” he stated, nodding at him approvingly.

It felt weird being complimented like that, Daishou never believed he looked alright, not even close to it, he was a mere insect unworthy of any attention.

But still his heart leaped in ecstasy as soon as those words left Kuroo´s mouth.

He didn´t style his hair today as the decision to go out came rather spontaneous.

You always thought he looked incredibly cute like this, he missed the way you´d look at him, the way your eyes sparked when you caressed his cheek. He swore he could still feel your warm hand.

His heart ached for you, he missed you terribly.

Sure, you were friends now, but Daishou was greedy, he wanted more.

Now that he has had a taste of what love could feel like, he didn´t ever want to feel anything else, he felt so safe with you, but more than that he needed you like the air he breathed.

Daishou simply didn´t function without you.

“I think you should stay home, Daishou” Bokuto said, looking at him with a worried expression.

Soon after moving in and being at a state of not hating each other, Daishou forced himself to open up a bit, if only to avoid his major trigger: alcohol.

Luckily his roommates were very supportive and respectful and so alcohol became a prohibited good in their apartment.

When Bokuto or Kuroo went out, they made sure not too drink too much and when they arrived home, they went straight to bed while being as silent as possible.

It worked well too, but Bokuto was always more perceptive than Kuroo in regards to mental health, he just picked up on the small things that Kuroo wouldn´t usually think about.

Not because he didn´t care, but just because the two had a very different way of thinking, Kuroo being more logical and Bokuto emotional.

“I´m fine, it´s okay. We´re not gonna stay long anyways. I just need some fresh air” Daishou said, his voice not even convincing himself, but he wasn´t ready to unpack the baggage that he carried currently.

And so the three of them walked out of their apartment, Bokuto already made up a plan in his head to let Daishou stay outside while he quickly delivered Kuroo.

He tried to minimize the time he had to spend in the company of drunk people as well as thinking about what to get for take out later.

But things never went as planned, did they?

As soon as they arrived at the bar, Daishou´s eyes diverted to the floor, he stayed frozen in place next to the entrance, trying his best to blend in with the wall, making himself as small as possible.

Others wouldn´t realize that something was wrong, they didn´t even spare a glance at him, which didn´t make the situation worse, but still, Bokuto could feel his heart clench in empathy.

Kuroo dragged him inside with him and when Yuuji saw them, he found himself in a conversation that felt like it would drag on forever.

He needed to get back to Daishou before he did something stupid, he knew that look in his eyes.

Also he felt like he was third wheeling and it made him very uncomfortable.

When things got too intimate for him, he just slipped away and hurried outside.

Daishou was still in the same spot, but he looked aghast.

Bokuto´s alarm bells rang all at the same time, he scratched the idea of getting take out for dinner and approached Daishou, apologizing loudly for being so late not to scare him.

He once tapped him on the shoulder in such a state before he knew how it made him feel and Daishou almost jumped out of his skin.

He kept quiet the whole walk home, sternly looking at the ground while Bokuto made conversation to distract him as best as he could.

As soon as they arrived at the apartment Daishou retreated to his room, sitting down on the floor, crouching down and resting his head on his knees.

Bokuto was quick to follow with a glass of water and whatever snack he could grab the fastest.

He sat down next to Daishou who was shaking and sobbing, clearly trying his best to keep quiet.

Just as he was taught.

Every time Daishou cried as a child, which was often, his father would tell him to shut up, hitting him hard across the face, most of the times leaving bruises.

To this day, Daishou still got jumpy when someone touched him without him seeing it, even something simple as just tapping his shoulder.

It made him cower in fear.

If he obeyed, he wouldn´t get hurt, it has always been this way and even after the divorce, even when he knew that he´d never have to see this horrible man again, he still saw his image in people he passed on the street.

Just like he did earlier.

His father was an alcoholic, making sure to tell Daishou what a mistake he was every time he got the chance to, his words left deep scars in Daishou´s mind and to this day he still felt unworthy.

His inferiority complex showed most in the way he played volleyball, not trusting his skills enough until he played for the uni team.

Kuroo and Bokuto helped more than he liked to admit, they were able to calm and silent his mind when he couldn´t and they became precious friends to him, a truly unlikely friendship.

He wanted to believe in himself like they did just one time.

Daishou had told Bokuto about his father in depth before, Kuroo only knew the gist of it all.

So Bokuto could only imagine what he must be going through right now.

“Let it all out, man. Don´t hold it in” he said and promptly Daishou´s crying got louder, but also more controlled.

He remembered when he had hyperventilated once before and how scared he was for him, how helpless he felt.

Ever since that incident Bokuto made sure to read into the topic of mental health and how to help properly.

He waited patiently until Daishou was done crying and then offered him the water and the snacks.

Daishou was grateful for his presence, Bokuto made him feel like it was okay that he wasn´t, like he had nothing to be ashamed of, like he was free.

“Thanks...” he said, his voice hoarse, finishing the glass and putting it next to him.

“That´s what friends are for. You´re not alone in this, we´re always here for you and if you want to talk about anything, you can unload it on me. I´m here to listen and to help” Bokuto told him, gently placing a hand on his shoulder and this time Daishou didn´t flinch, he only looked up at him with swollen eyes and a grateful smile.

“Can I tell you something stupid?” Daishou asked, sniffling to which Bokuto nodded.

“I don´t want to be just friends with (Y/N). I´m too dependent on her, I miss her too much… I don´t think I ever loved someone as much as I love her and I don´t think I will ever love anyone else…” he admitted out loud for the first time. It was something that he always knew to be true and yet it sounded so unhealthy, so toxic that he didn´t want it to be.

“It´s not stupid. Feelings are never stupid.” Bokuto said sternly and in such an earnest voice, it made Daishou chuckle.

He felt at peace until someone knocked on their door.

Bokuto got up and opened it, finding your distressed face.

“Kuroo told me what happened, is he alright?” you asked out of breath. Just a few minutes ago, Kuroo and Yuuji entered your apartment, lips locked and limbs entangled.

They only had to mention that Daishou came with them to the bar to make you hyper aware of the consequences. You acted on instinct as you did so many times before, no matter your relationship status right now.

Bokuto couldn´t really react in time and just stepped aside to let you in, pointing to Daishou´s room.

It was strange. In Daishou´s mind you hated him, from his perspective you wanted nothing to do with him, you were just with him out of pity.

He held you in such high regards that he never once thought about your feelings from a realistic point of view.

Bokuto had to smile, it was so clear to him that you loved Daishou just as much as he loved you.

“Sugu? It´s me… I´m coming in” you announced your presence, refraining to knock because you knew loud and sudden noises scared him.

Slowly you opened the door and found him sitting on the floor, in the same miserable position as before, looking up at you with pleading eyes, eyes that said ´I´m sorry I´m a mess, a failure´, ´I´m sorry that I can´t ever be good enough´.

You sat down next to him, just close enough for him to know that you were there but not too close to make him uncomfortable.

“Code red?” you softly asked, it was your secret code to make sure he didn´t cut.

He shook his head, reaching out his arms for you so you could check, it was routine, it made him feel safe rather than ashamed and embarrassed.

You slowly rolled up his sleeves to inspect his scars, the freshest were about a few months old.

Nothing changed. Your heart still ached when you saw them, you felt somewhat responsible for them and guilty as well.

Daishou didn´t deserve to suffer like this…

“You know you´re not alone, right?” you softly asked.

He nodded.

“Bokuto and Kuroo… they help a lot” he said, making you relax your worried expression a bit.

“Don´t let them win, the voices in your head. They´re not real, always remember that. Something that isn´t real doesn´t have any control over you, but you have all the control over it. Use it. You´re stronger than you think, Sugu” you still held onto his arms without realizing it, softly tracing your fingers over them.

“I miss you…” he quietly said, averting his eyes, before speaking again.

“I don´t wanna be just friends” as soon as those words left his mouth you pulled him into a tight hug, your hands caressing his back.

Daishou immediately relaxed into your touch, hugging you back desperately.

“Good, because I could never see you as just a friend. I love you too much for that” you told him, your hands wandering through his hair as he let himself be calmed down by your touch.

“I love you too…” he mumbled into your chest and slowly loosened the hug.

You two looked at each other for a while, warm and gentle smiles plastered on your faces as you slowly leaned in to kiss him.

Daishou kissed back eagerly since he´s been waiting so long and when your lips connected it felt like coming home.

[himbowelsh]

You can totally ignore this if you want but I could I request some sad headcanons about the guys. Like how they deal with ptsd or insecurities or traumatic childhood incidents.

Richard Winters

dick isn’t emotionally open in general.  he keeps things in.  that’s how he was raised, how he’s grown up, and the only way he really knows how to cope with things.  talking about his feelings...  is uncomfortable.

that said, he processes them well.  dick doesn’t let negative emotions fester.  he finds releases for them, either through doing things he enjoys or spending time around his loved ones.  he’s not the sort of person to linger on things.

will definitely overwork himself when his mind is in a troubled place.   being productive helps him so much.  focusing on things he can control, things that need to get done...  sure, he’s going to bed at 3am, but it’s not because he’s upset, it’s because he was working.

doesn’t...  like being alone when things are on his mind.  it’s too easy to get sucked in, for those loud thoughts to drown everything else out.  being around other people...  not sharing, but just not being alone...  it helps.

Lewis Nixon

*summon the folger’s theme song*  the best part of waking up...  is an obscene amount of high-shelf liquor in your cup!!

hey, it’s nine o’clock...  in the morning.

literally.  nix is of the opinion that if you can’t drink the bad thoughts away, then they’re not worth thinking at all.  the thing is, his brain summons them anyways, because brains are awful like that.

he’s got a lot of trauma!!  so much trauma!!  his childhood was miserable, his family’s the worst, he feels like a disappointment and has no desire to try to prove himself to parents whose love was questionable from the day he was born...

lots of insecurities too.  can you tell?

he won’t talk about any of it unless he’s really, really drunk, with someone he counts among his closest friends.  then sometimes the negativity just rushes out.  he can’t help it, and it gets ugly.

otherwise, he broods, he holds it all in, and he drinks.  would he benefit from therapy?  yes, absolutely, but alcoholism tastes so much better.

Carwood Lipton

this is a healthy man right here

he copes with things.  lip has interests, outlets he can channel his frustrations into, and the ability to rationalize things internally and get them off his chest.  most things don’t weigh on him for long, because he’s got those sweet coping skills.

this isn’t even angsty.  he doesn’t have a lot of emotional angst.  he works through things, mostly by processing them on his own  ---  but if something’s really weighing on him, lip will turn to his most trusted person  (his mother gives great advice)  for an outlet.

Ron Speirs

heh heh.  ohhhh boy.

he’s...  he’s speirs, okay.  he’s not gonna open up and talk about what’s bothering him, because that’s his business, and no one else needs to know.

ron...  gets impulsive.  reckless.  places less regard on his own life.  he’ll do obscenely risky things because he’s kind of an adrenaline junkie; that burst of danger actually helps him cope with what’s bothering him.  at least, it gives him a good reason to keep going.

he retreats into himself when it comes to anything emotional.   broods a little, but if anyone asks what’s on his mind, he won’t say a word. 

“well, we’re all on a steady march towards death anyways, does anything really matter?  no.  i’m already dead so nothing has any consequences.  yeet.”

jesus christ, get this man some therapy.

Harry Welsh

talks it out.  literally, he’s just... gonna share things.  he’ll literally just do that.

harry sometimes can be an oversharer, but he never really learned to put a filter on his emotions.  it helps that he’s sort of the “water off a duck’s back” type of person; he doesn’t take a lot of things personally, so when he does need to rant about something, it’s usually big.  he turns to his loved ones, because he trusts them, and usually they can help.

but it is kind of weird for guys like nixon and winters, whose life mottos are “i’ll keep all of my emotions right here and then someday i’ll die”, to hear harry be like  “I’M UPSET TODAY AND HERE’S WHY”.  like...  he really doesn’t care who knows what’s going on in his soul, huh?  he’s really able to open up like that.

(harry is the most emotionally healthy man here, good for him)

Buck Compton

it’s called impostor syndrome, and buck has it.

he’s a confident guy, but under the surface, has insecurity in spades  ---  he feels like he has a lot to live up to, and doesn’t believe he’s doing everything well enough.  he’s supposed to be exceptional, and that’s a heavy burden to bear.  there’ll be a part of him that’s always going to feel like he’s not good enough.

like...  he seriously doesn’t know quite where to begin when processing negative emotions, because he feels like he should be able to deal with them himself.  his first instinct isn’t to talk it out, or seek out positive outlets; he keeps it all inside because he feels he can handle it.

don’t get me wrong, buck handles things well  ---  he’s resilient.   but every so often, the emotions just get so overwhelming, and boil up like a toxic spill inside of him; it can get overwhelming.  

Eugene Roe

conceal don’t feel buddy

look, gene...  never acquired coping skills growing up.  it wasn’t anyone’s first priority, and he had too many sisters monopolizing his mother’s time.  as a kid, gene had genuine anger issues, and would get into trouble often, because he just...  didn’t know how to deal with what he was feeling.

his grandmother was the one who stepped in and taught him how to pray.  that’s the closest thing gene has to comfort; he is quietly devout, and turns to god in his darkest moments when desperate for some guidance.  if he can’t talk to anyone else about what he’s feeling  ---  and he usually prefers not to  ---  he can speak freely to god.

but god can’t help him shoulder his burdens.  genuinely, gene just needs to learn to open up and share. keeping everything bottled up...  is not good for him.

George Luz

laugh the pain away, until you no longer can.

people assume george luz processes his emotions in a healthy way.  these people are incorrect.  his “fake it til you make it approach” isn’t the worst, but 9/10 therapists would not recommend.   (the 10th is luz, doing his best impression of a therapist.)

he laughs things off. it’s easier than to do that than to let people in.  george hates burdening others with his feelings.  he’s got a natural talent for keeping peoples’ spirits up, so bringing them down with him is...  a frightening idea.  it feels like failure.

for the most part, george is good at keeping things in and processing them internally.  if something’s really bothering him, people close can tell  ---  he hardly smiles, and his jokes aren’t as funny as they are dark  ---  but he’s usually able to recover without any help.  he’s good at dealing with things on his own.

he tries not to drink too much, because if he gets really really drunk, he loses his grip.  then it can all come spilling out, in a big messy wave of feelings, and he’d prefer to avoid that at all costs.

oh gosh, there’s this amazing fic that actually centers around babe and roe dealing with their problems, but there’s this one scene with luz, and it breaks me

Joe Toye

in a word?  not well.

joe dealing with things...  is not a pretty picture.  he prefers to not deal with things, to be honest, because it’s easier to pretend all the emotional shit doesn’t exist and just push it down until he can’t feel it anymore.  sometimes it even works.

truth is, joe has a lot of insecurities, and really struggles to deal with them.  they plague him]...  and while he can channel some of it into anger  (there’s a reason my modern!toye takes up kickboxing)  a lot of it just gets sent straight to depression central.

it’s not something he talks about easily, either.   he wasn’t raised in an environment that encouraged men talking about their feelings; joe comes from a tough irish family where everyone, especially the men, are supposed to keep a stern face and power through.  he’s only able to opens up to a few trusted people   (malarkey, maybe guarnere, maybe luz).  when the emotions reach a boiling point...  they don’t have anywhere to go.  they feel like they’re going to consume him.

he’s contemplated some dark things before, and it’s not something he’s proud of.

Bill Guarnere

what the hell is this man even made of???

bill takes all his negative emotions and converts them into fuel.    every tear his body forces him to shed adds an extra year to his life.

he’s incredibly resilient, and can power through pretty much anything.  losing his leg didn’t take him out for long; sure, it was a blow, but he bounced back from it as strong as ever.  losing his brother was agonizing  (worse than the leg, honestly)  and it made bill furious  ---  but that fury kept him going, and kept him alive.   he reacts to grief by turning it into anger, and once that anger dulls it’s just raw energy keeping him moving.

bill copes by being around people.  honestly  ---  just put him in a room with his best friends and his problems gradually fade out.   it’s not like he bares his soul to them; he just needs to be around friends, enjoying life. their presence helps him work through things better than any therapist.

(peak extrovert energy omg)

Babe Heffron

just like bill, babe also recovers by being around his favorite people.

he draws energy from them; it’s like he’s low on cash, so he asks his buddies for a few dollars, but in this case it’s emotional stability.  babe just copes better around other people.

left alone with his own thoughts...  things can get messy.

this man doesn’t do well with being alone in general  ---  he feels isolated, almost forgotten, and will seek out the nearest person just to chase those dark feelings away.  when babe’s struggling with something, he also struggles with how to deal with it.   the emotions are like a pot bubbling over inside of him, and he’s fighting to make sense of them all.  he can’t do that alone.

he has to express himself to someone.  ideally someone he trusts, but it might just end up being whoever’s available, or whoever’s nearby.  his dark emotions are very potent, and very painful; it takes a while for him to be free of them completely, but having someone else help make sense of them  (or just offer reassurance)  helps.

he’s a crier.  he’s not proud of it, but when babe’s really at his brink, he cries.  it’s an ugly sight.

Shifty Powers

just freaking...  goes off into the wilderness.

no, literally.  shifty needs some quiet time.  when he’s struggling, he’ll take his gun, take his car, and vanish for a while.   (that sounds...  worse than it is.  shifty’s not the kind of person to consider hurting himself.)    he just disappears into the woods.   

the longest he’s ever been gone was two whole days...  but he always returns with a clear head, willing to talk things out.

Joe Liebgott

he just...  straight up doesn’t, man.  he doesn’t deal with shit.  he pushes it aside, forces it back  ---  it’s not exactly repression, because the Bad Stuff is always there on the outskirts of his mind at all times, lieb just actively chooses not to deal with it.

(he’ll pick any fight except the ones in his own head.)

you’ve got to understand, he’s had his share of trauma.  he didn’t have an easy go of it before the war, and definitely not during.  liebgott collects emotional baggage like baseball cards, and at this point he’s got a full set.

if he can run from the emotions, he will.  this leads him to self-isolate, cutting himself off from the people who might be able to help; he doesn’t want to share all the negative emotions, because he doesn’t know how.  at his worst, he also tends to lash out, and...  other people don’t have to deal with that, okay?

joe will put off dealing with things for as long as possible, and never truly deal with them at all.

David Kenyon Webster

writing is literally his therapy.  putting his emotions down on paper helps.  formulating them into words is like a release, and having them laid out in front of him, where he can analyze it all lets him look at the problem objectively.  webster writes just to get things out...  sometimes because he can’t bear to hold it all inside any longer.

he also loves sailing, partly because of how freeing it is to be out on the open water.  he’s completely in control of his boat, and can go anywhere, anywhere in the world  ---  if he wanted, he could leave everything behind.  the notion is tantalizing.

webster really isn’t open about his negative feelings with others.  when it’s something personal...  it takes a lot for him to open up, and he’d have to trust that person implicitly.  a part of him feels that baring his emotions is just an invitation to be mocked, so he’s hesitant.

at least he processes them.  he’s not tormented by things, because he’s got his releases  ---  writing, and sailing.  if the mind is a prison, they set him free.

Donald Malarkey

catch malarkey right there in that kickboxing class with joe toye

look.  don feels things deeply, and takes things personally.  he can’t help it.  he doesn’t let go of things; if he’s been hurt badly, it’s an open wound on his soul forever, and it never heals.

he’s never a wreck.  like, he’s perfectly able to function, and has a unique ability to power through even in the darkest moments...  but those shadows are always there, and they weigh on him.  they smother him.   he can never really escape.

tends to avoid the topics which hurt him; when they come up, he can get testy  ---  or worse, teary!!  ---   and that’s not something he wants to burden anyone else with.     his greatest hurts are very private things to him, and he doesn’t want the people he cares about affected by them.

Skip Muck

skip channels his bad feelings into energy, and that energy needs to find its way out.

he’ll play guitar and sing along really aggressively.  he’ll deep-clean the entire house.  he’ll run just to feel the burn in his lungs, the ache in his limbs, until he’s too worn out to feel anything but exhaustion.

honestly, he gets a little manic when something’s bothering him.   he needs to chill.

skip is...  more willing than most to talk things out, so long as he has someone he trusts.   it’s not too hard for him to open up, he just needs to be able to open up to the right people.  his sister is a frequent confidant, as are malarkey and penkala.   skip doesn’t like many people seeing the darker side of him, but being able to talk about his feelings helps immensely.

Ralph Spina

genuinely... doesn’t have any baggage.

no childhood trauma.  no agonizing breakup story or betrayals.  no emotional damage whatsoever.  and when something is bothering him, his instinct is to just talk it out, and then it’s done. this man sleeps like a baby.

it’s freaky.

[youremeimyou]

Promise Me(pt.2)

Part 1 - Part 2

pairing: Park Jimin x reader (ft. Kim Taehyung) genre: Lots of angst, fluff and pure drama... word count: 5k warnings: alcohol consumption, sexual tension

Description: Y/N is Jimin’s longest and best friend. Certain feelings are caught and meanwhile, Jimin accidently sets Y/N up with his other best friend. But not before getting her to make him a promise.

A/N: First off, sorry cuz I know it’s been a long time since pt.1. But finally pt.2 is here, yayy! This one’s a bit more angsty but these two boys are both fluffballs so there are lots of cute stuff. (sighs)I just love Vmin so much, it was hard to do this justice. I hope I could and I hope you’ll like it. I’d love to know what you think. Enjoy!

It had almost been a month since the eventful Christmas. Taehyung was walking to the girl's dorm to spend some time with Y/N. This was his third time going without Jimin since he finally found the courage to go alone a few weeks ago, when he made up a stupid excuse for showing up at her door in the middle of the night.

Of course he was drunk that night. A few words may have slipped out of his mouth that made Y/N a blushing mess. But he never made a move on her in his drunken state and she appreciated that. Y/N took care of him, helped him sober up, let him sleep on her couch. So it became normal for him to drop by just to hang out since then.

After everything that went down on Christmas, Jimin only had one mission in mind: Avoid both of your best friends at all costs.

It was obviously hard considering one of them was a person he saw everyday since he was a kid and the other was his roommate. But he tried his best. It was starting to become tiring, feeling bothered and even heartbroken without understanding why and pretending to be okay so they wouldn't figure out. So he was more ghost than man over the course of last month.

It didn't go unnoticed by Y/N of course, she saw through his acts easily. Especially the times they would work on the musical. Normally doing anything with Jimin was fun for Y/N, even work and studying. And producing a musical normally would've been crazy fun. But Y/N could tell he was being distant. He wouldn't even come over much, saying there was still a lot of time to work on the project. All of that broke Y/N's heart to pieces.

There was a flower in Taehyung's hand that he picked up from the little winter garden at the coffee shop he'd been coming from. And he contemplated whether or not to give it to Y/N as he waited outside her room. But suddenly the door opened.

"Oh- Hey Tae! What're you doing here?"

"Uhh.. Hi. I just came by to ask you if you wanted to play some Mortal Kombat." he said, having trouble keeping eye contact.

"You mean you wanna get your ass kicked by the best player around? Sure." Y/N smirked. "I was just about to take out the trash so after that-"

Taehyung took it from her hands.

"I'll take it out and you get the game ready?" He made it sound like a question but started walking away to do as he said at the same time.

"Wait. What's that in your..?"

Taehyung looked back to see Y/N pointing at the flower in his hand, a funny expression on her face. He mentally face palmed.

"Oh this? Uhh it's just-" he sighed defeatedly and passed it to her. "It's for you." She was cringing and laughing but it still made his heart race as she took it to her nose.

"Thanks, it smells so nice."

After 15 rounds of K.O. -each with fatality- from Y/N, Taehyung gave up and put the controller down with a frown. Then he noticed the sketches on the coffee table.

"Oh, come on. You're good at music, acting and drawing? How's that fair for the rest of the world?" Taehyung protested.

"I'm merely mediocre at the first two and I suck at the last one. Admit it."

"No way! What were you drawing here?"

"Uh.. Jimin.."

Taehyung's eyes went wide. "Oh. Okay, sorry it just looks more like Bart Simpson than anything."

They both burst into laughter.

"I know. It's just- the professor wants the posters to also be original and made by us. So I wanted it to be a cool drawing of Jimin. You know, cause he's the lead." Her face dropped as she continued. "And also.. Jimin's been out of my reach lately. Which sucks.. So I thought maybe I could surprise him and make up for anything stupid I did to make him avoid me."

Taehyung could tell how important this was to her. He also was on Jimin's 'to avoid list'. An idea popped into his mind.

"Well, I can work on a poster for Jimin. Though, it'll be kinda hard to keep it from him. He always loves to snoop whenever I'm working on something."

Taehyung was a graphic design student that did illustrations for a comic book shop as part time gig. So he was more than qualified. But all of his equipment and designing programs were on his computer. And his wasn't a laptop but a desktop pc.

"You're just gonna have to distract him for me!" Taehyung said while looking like he presented the best idea ever.

"That is a brilliant idea. But our lovely Chim doesn't really talk to me novadays." Y/N's frown returned. She really had missed him.

"Come on, he can never resist you."

Now that was true. All three of them knew it. Even if it made Taehyung a bit upset, he just knew their relationship was something way bigger than anything else. And so, they made a deal and shook on it. Taehyung was gonna get free tickets to the musical in return for designing the poster.

Later that day, Taehyung texted Y/N saying he had an inspiration and that she needed to get Jimin out of the room to start working on it. So she quickly got ready and went over there.

She knocked on the door and heard both of the boys collectively say "Come in!" When she walked in she saw that Jimin really was trying to look at what Taehyung was doing on his computer. A curious little baby, she thought.

"Hey Chim. Whatcha doin'?"

The look on Jimin's face as he looked at her was confusing. Because it contained nervousness and edginess but also longing and relief. It gave hope to Y/N in thinking she wasn't the only one missing a best friend. Jimin walked over to her and when he noticed a strand of hair fall on her eyes, he gently put it back behind her ear.

"Nothing much. You?"

"Same. Wanna come over and work on some dance moves? I feel like I can't do any of 'em right. I really need you.."

She had no idea why she expressed that last part with so much emotion. But it made Jimin inhale sharply.

"Okay, sure."

"Great! Oh, you go ahead and I just gotta return Taehyung this uh.. pen I burrowed."

Y/N had one of her own pens in her hand and Jimin knew it. But he wasn't gonna dig on the subject. He just settled for rolling his eyes and saying "Fine.." as he walked out. Taehyung on the other hand was confused not remembering ever lending her a pen.

"Here Tae, thanks!" She shouted that so Jimin would hear and then whispered the next part.

"Whatever you do, just draw him dancing. Oh, and I want my pen back later."

Y/N knew her neighboors would complain about the noise she and Jimin were making while practising. But it didn't matter. With the way his body moved fluidly as he showed her his smooth and flawless moves and the way he held her hips to move her and teach her when she couldn't get it right.. Y/N didn't care one bit about the neighboors, no.

Every once in a while he would dance behind her to lead her through the choreography, all the while his breathy voice in her ear, panting and counting the steps. Needless to say she felt hot and bothered. So she suggested to take a break.

The chamomile sitting on the little table inside a glass of water caught Jimin's eye. He knew for a fact Y/N wasn't a flower person. Whenever he'd buy her some in the past, they'd always end up dead. He did have a guess in mind about who might've brought it here, though.

"I hope he won't get upset when it dies in like two days." He pointed to it with his head.

"I know he's your friend but sorry, that thing was a goner as soon as it was placed in my care."

"Well, sad. Cause coming from Taehyung, it's kinda a big gesture."

A frown formed on Y/N's brows, with the worry of making Taehyung upset. But flowers just didn't grow with her, nothing could be done.

"I'm afraid it wasn't the right gesture to pull on me."

"He doesn't know you like I do."

By this point, he was much closer to Y/N than he was at the beginning of the conversation. Y/N hadn't even realized him moving towards her. This rehersal had been nothing but tense so far.

"No one does, Chim."

They looked into each other's eyes as if it was a staring contest. Jimin would normally win those. But having her right in front of him, with drops of sweat falling from her face down to her collarbones and heat radiating off her skin, he felt a push like never before to get even closer so he had to step back as caution.

"Good job today, panda. These moves fit you so well."

"Thanks. And thanks for teaching me. Sorry for being such a burden-"

"Hey!" Jimin cut in and stepped towards her again to look her in the eyes once more. "You could never be a burden." He gave her a kiss on the forehead and left soon after.

The evening came pretty soon and Y/N was very exhausted after all the dancing around earlier. Jimin was a professional at it. His body and condition would rival any of the boys on soccer team. But Y/N wasn't fit like that. So she was getting ready to call it at a day. In fact, she was barely awake as she layed on the couch. She nearly jumped out of her skin when her phone went off loudly with notifications. Her brain immediately presumed to see 'Chimmy' on the screen but instead it was 'TaeTae'.

-Hey wanna come over real quick? Jimin went out.

-I mean to talk about the poster, I swear I’m not a perv.. u awake?? I really need opinions!

-Y/N, he'll be out prolly all night, this is our chance.

Out all night? Why would he be out all night? Y/N quickly called Jimin first before even opening the messages.

"Angel? What's up?"

"Hey Chim, where are you?"

"Uh.. on my way to the library. I have intel that there'll be a quiz on Theatre History tomorrow." He voiced the last part like those characters in spy movies.

"Oh. Why didn't you tell me? I took that class last year and still have my notes, I could come help you."

"I know but no need, lovely. You were already tired today. And Namjoon hyung's here to give me an intensive course."

He always managed to make a smiling fool out of Y/N with the endless, sweet nicknames. This time wasn't an exception.

"Anything up with you? If you need something I'm already outside I can-"

"No, I just wanted to check in on you, I'm about to go to sleep. Good luck and say hi to Joon."

"I will. Sweet dreams, angel."

She got up to walk to her bed but remembered Taehyung’s messages. Her body desperately craved sleep but Taehyung was right. It was a great opening with Jimin out of the room so she dragged her feet over there. 

When Taehyung opened the door and saw a sleepy Y/N, his stomach started doing flips and somersaults. As a result, he was a stuttering mess.

“Hey, sorry if uh.. if I wake- woke you. Come on- come in! Come in.”

His hair was wet. There was a towel over his shoulders and he held a t-shirt over his chest. Fresh out of the shower. Y/N eyes traced the t-shirt down to where once she knew his tummy was from P.E. classes in high school. Tummy was no more, though. Those were qualified abs. Not overdone but just the right amount of them. Once she noticed she was staring, her eyes quickly changed direction. And when he noticed what she had been doing, he visibly blushed and audibly gulped.

“Oh.. When you didn’t write back, I thought you might’ve gone to sleep so I just hopped in the shower.” he explained as he quickly put on his shirt.

They went over to his computer to see the progress of the poster. Taehyung sat on the chair in front of the table and Y/N took a seat on Taehyung’s bed right next to it.

“Woah, Tae it looks incredible. I can’t believe you’re done so soon!”

“Done? No, I’m not done. There’re still a lot of details we should go through.”

As Taehyung mumbled the list of said details, Y/N couldn’t get her attention away from the poster. The elegancy and the delicacy of the move Jimin was pictured doing seemed so real, like an actual photo. But the colors and the environment looked so abstract. 

“You’ve really captured the essence of Jimin and the way he loses himself to dance. Wow.”

“I’ve seen him perform enough times to familiarize with the demon that posesses him on stage.”

Thank you Mr. Demon, Y/N thought as she always did when seeing Jimin perform.

Taehyung then settled on his bed next to Y/N with a pen and paper on his hands to sketch. He was asking Y/N about the stuff he wanted to change or add and etc and showing her what it would roughly look like. And Y/N tried her best to give opinions but her eyes were slowly but surely closing, drifting into sweet slumber. And so she dozed off. Taehyung didn’t even notice until he also was pulled by sleep. 

He thought about waking her up but couldn’t bring himself to do it. He watched her steadily breathing for a while before being taken by sleep himself. 

A few hours later Jimin came back from the library and slowly got inside his room, guessing his roomate would be sleeping. What he never would’ve expected was seeing Y/N curled up next to him. Sleeping by his side. 

That devastating feeling came back to sit on Jimin’s chest. She knew Jimin would be out for hours, maybe even until the morning. She called Jimin before coming here. Why? Why would she sneak in here without saying anything to him? Why would she keep this.. whatever it was a secret from him? They were clearly way closer than Jimin imagined. 

His breath got stuck in his throat. He felt furious and heartbroken and he wanted to run away but stopped dead in his tracks. The thought of leaving them alone in here like this seemed inconceivable at that moment. So he walked over to his bed and plumped on it. Pulling the cover over his head he hoped it wasn’t real but when he got his head out again, the view was the same.

That’s when he saw Y/N twitching and grunting in discomfort. She was slowly gaining back consciousness. Her head was between her hands as she tried to wake up fully, realizing she fell asleep unintentionally. After miraculously managing to slip out of the bed without waking Taehyung up, she noticed Jimin sitting on his bed staring at her. She wobbly walked over to him. And even though Jimin was upset, he still felt worried, she didn’t look well.

“What’s wrong with you?” 

“This crazy headache woke me up. I feel like vomiting.”

Jimin got up and went to check on her by instinct. “Let’s get you to a doctor.” 

“No no. It’s just normal migraine stuff, Chim. It won’t pass unless I manage to go back to sleep. I should get back to my room.”

She started walking towards the door and decided to explain everything to Jimin in the morning when she’d be able to do it better. Jimin on the other hand couldn’t leave her alone when she was in this much pain. Putting everything aside for the time being, he pulled her back by her arm.

“Just come here, Y/N.”

He pulled her into the bed next to himself and gently turned her to face the other way. His hands travelled on her temples, eyes and forhead, slowly massaging the areas. He would place little kisses on the back of her head from time to time, too. She’d get these headaches every once in a while so Jimin had learned over time what he could do to make her feel better. 

“It’ll be okay. Just close your eyes, try clearing your head and take deep breaths, baby.” he whispered in her ear. 

Jimin’s arms were home. Warm, comfy and familiar. Even that headache couldn’t hold Y/N back from dozing off once more and sleeping soundly in his embrace. Jimin kept watching over her and only allowed himself to sleep when it seemed like all her pain was gone.

With the morning sun Y/N slowly came around from sleep. She felt the lack of a set of arms around her so she turned around to regain them as her eyes were still closed. They opened in disbelief when she couldn’t find the source. Her eyes looked around the room next but only to find that both Jimin and Taehyung were gone. 

Y/N stayed in bed, trying to remember details of last night. She had accidently fallen asleep on Taehyung’s bed. She wondered what Jimin thought when he saw her like that. He did seem upset and she’d love to explain it to him but that terrible headache.. And how Jimin took care of her. Wasn’t new that he helped her but the atmosphere felt different at that moment. Despite being distant for a while before, he was being more intimate with her lately. A different kind of intimate. She really wanted to have a talk with him. She decided to text him but she saw the texts he had sent before on the screen.

-Y/N, I had to leave to get to class. If you're still not feeling okay, you have to go to the doctor. Let me know if you do. If not, bagels in the fridge and coffee's made.

-My keys are on the night stand you can leave them under the mat if you go out. But I'd love to have you there when I get back, angel.

There it was. An opportunity to have the talk. Jimin seemed to want to, as well. So decided on waiting there, it was a free day for her anyways.

Some time later sounds came from the door implicating someone coming in. Y/N thought it must've been Jimin. It was his taller counterpart.

"Oh, uh.. morning, Y/N."

"Hey, Tae. Did you have an early class?"

"No, it's my free day just like you. I just went out for a walk."

"In this cold?" Y/N teased, smiling.

"I was kinda hot headed so the cold helped."

His voice was even deeper than normal. And the features of his face were unusually hardened.

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah, sure."

He shot her a quick smile that didn't even reach his eyes. And anyone that knew Taehyung knew he was never insincere. That was against his nature.

"You can talk to me about anything." Y/N said as she handed him the cup of coffee she poured for him when he came in.

Taehyung stared at the mug. Then, at her strecthed out arm and lastly at her eyes, without saying a word or moving. He looked like he was thinking carefully about what he was gonna say next.

"I didn't wanna scare you away last night. I hope I wasn't but I apperantly have this habit of hugging things as I sleep so I'm sorry if-"

"Wha- No Tae and I wouldn't mind if you were either. You didn't scare me away. A headache woke me up."

"But when I woke up, I saw you over there." He pointed to Jimin's bed. Shit. Y/N worried about what Jimin thought of the situation last night but it didn't occur to her how Taehyung would take it. She sometimes forgot what Jimin told her about Taehyung's feelings. The last thing she'd want would be to break his heart.

"Jimin helped me. There's this massage thing he invented for when I get headaches. That's why we were-"

"I know it's not the first time I've seen you two like that but it's just-" Courage came to him all of a sudden so he took a step forward. "I thought I was being more.. open with you. And call me crazy if I'm wrong but it feels like we've become closer. Haven't we?"

They had been.Taehyung wasn't someone Y/N could easily disregard. And she knew she kept letting him in more and more over time. But she was just confused by Jimin all the time. Maybe she shouldn't have been, though. Jimin's been witnessing them getting closer but wasn't doing or saying anything about it, she thought. Guess he really was okay with it. Obviously he didn't want his relationship with Y/N to change into something.. else.

"You're not wrong, Tae. We have."

His eyes lit up and his mood got back up after hearing her say that. He didn't wanna rush things but he didn't want to do nothing either.

"Tonight, when you're hungry and when I'm also hungry we could- could we? Eat? Like outside- I know a great place."

Y/N couldn't help but smile seeing him stumble over his words.

"How are you this shy with the way you look is still beyond me." It was a sincere comment and she was pleasently surprised to be able to say it to his face. Taehyung still blushed like crazy, though. Then he took a deep breath and asked more confidently.

"Can I take you out to dinner tonight?"

Maybe she needed to move on from the limbo she was in, after all.

"Yeah.."

------

A ryhtmic knocking came from Y/N's door. She opened it and was met with a Jimin holding a lot of shopping bags.

"Chim! What's all that?"

"Well my quiz went amazingly, thanks for asking. So I thought we could celebrate. We're gonna make a cake!"

"I think you've gotten enough stuff to make ten cakes. And congrats."

"Ten cakes are even better. And thanks. But hey, I thought you’d be waiting for your man to get back at his room where he left you." Jimin teased with a smug smirk on his face. And Y/N’s mouth fell open a little in shock. But she quickly recovered and played along.

“Well my man took his time to come back. I can’t be kept in a cage, waiting forever for a guy.” They stared at each other until Jimin said “And scene..”

They were laughing as they carried the stuff inside and upon Jimin insisting, they started with the cake immediately. Twenty minutes in, they already created the biggest mess and didn't even get much done from fooling around. Jimin was in a good mood, dancing around, teasing Y/N and it all felt normal.

Y/N was making chocolate sauce and beckoned Jimin for a taste test. He came to her, sticking his head out from behind, over her shoulder and placing his hands on both sides of the stove, trapping her body with his own. Closer than close. He reached for the spoon and immediately closed his eyes after tasting, humming deeply.

"Mmhhmm.. my diligent panda, it tastes like paradise! Great job."

"Exaggerate away.."

"It does! Go ahead and taste for yourself."

Jimin took the spoon out of her hand and offered her some. He watched her as she tasted it. He was already staring at her lips and now they were covered in chocolate. There was some left on the corner of her mouth, too. Jimin felt that push again but this time he was already too close to not act on it.

He leaned forward and licked the chocolate away. Y/N just froze, not even being able to react.

"You had a little left.. on the corner right there."

When they finally broke apart Jimin got a bottle of wine out from one of the bags.

"I got this for when the cake is ready."

A while later there was some music they put in the background, only a few pieces were left of the two cakes that they made and the wine bottle had been emptied very quickly. It was still early into the evening but emotions, thoughts and feelings were already all over the place. 

They were at their usual spot. On the floor in front of the couch with Y/N seated in the space between Jimin’s legs and Jimin’s arms wrapped up around her. Movements were sloppy due to alcohol. Jimin placed his head on her shoulder. 

“I’m sleepy.” Y/N almost couldn’t understand what he said because of his mumbling. 

“Are you now? I don’t ever remember you being an early bird.”

“What can I do? You’re so cozy.”

“Me? It’s probably the wine making you sle-”

“Nope, this much wouldn’t affect me. It’s all you, bear.”

Bear was a new one, she loved it.

“Oh!” Jimin hopped up and down where he was sitting. “I know your secret~” he sang. Y/N’s eyes went wide. Did Taehyung tell him about the date? And why was he taking it this excitedly?

“Umm.. I don’t know what you’re talki-”

“I saw it on Taehyung’s PC. I figured it was your idea. And the way you were sneaking around with him made much more sense.” He huffed as if in relief. Y/N was also relieved. He meant the poster, not the date. Good. She wanted to be the one to tell him.

“He did all the work. And you weren’t supposed to see until he felt like it was done completely!”

“My dude’s got talent. And I always snoop around, he knows that.” 

They were giggling, Jimin put his head back down on her shoulder and closed his eyes. Y/N’s eyes went to the clock to see the time they agreed on meeting with Taehyung was getting close. She had to tell Jimin about it. 

“I gotta jet soon, Chim.”

“No, you wouldn’t leave me.”

“But I have to get ready.”

Jimin got his head up suddenly in denial with a lovely pout. 

“Where’re you going?”

“Out to dinner.” She paused to avert her eyes from him. “With Taehyung.”

Jimin had a rude awakening. “A date? An offical one?”

She just nodded. They didn’t speak for some time and just stared into space. But something happened in the silence. Jimin understood now. Up until that moment, what he knew was that Y/N was his person. Everyone around them knew it as well. But the void Jimin felt whenever this subject was brought up finally made sense to him. And he had promised himself that he’d tell her as soon as he knew. So that’s what he’d do.

“Don’t go.”

He spoke clearly and seriously.

“What?”

“Even though you complied back then, it was wrong of me to make you promise to not care about anyone the way you care about me.”

“Jimin, I could never-”

“We might be best and oldest friends but that wouldn’t be fair to anyone we open our hearts to. And especially you. You’ve given so much to me and I became comfortable on the recieving end. The reason I made you make that promise is because I knew I wanted to be the one you loved most but I was so dumb to not realize why until now.” 

He moved his head closer and closer until their lips were so close that they even touched but only slightly. 

“I know I’m so stupid. But I’m so in love with you, Y/N. I wanna kiss you so bad..” Y/N was sure her heart would jump right out of her chest at any second.

“But I won’t if you don’t want me to-”

Y/N quickly closed whatever little distance was left between their faces, not being able to take it any longer. Jimin was surprised but when he felt her trying to pull away, he held her and deepened the kiss. He slowly and gently pushed her down on the ground with his body on top of hers, lips still connected. Then linked one of his hands with hers while the other one was still placed on the back of her head, protecting it from bumping onto the ground earlier. 

When they finally parted lips, both were panting. Y/N ran her hand through Jimin’s hair. Jimin was looking at her with fragile eyes. 

“Does this mean you’re not going?”

“No, I only kissed you because there was some chocolate left on your lips and I didn’t want it to go to waste.”

Jimin actually took it seriously for a moment. He let out a relieved sigh when he realized the corners of her mouth curving upwards in humour.

“I can’t believe it took you this long, Jimin.” Y/N complained. 

“What do you mean? Wait- Did you already-”

“You finally figured out your feelings but you never had a clue about mine?”

Jimin was shocked. “Are you serious right now?”

“I’ve always loved you, idiot. And I’ve been pining after you for the longest time.”

“I’m sorry.” he quickly pecked her lips over and over and spoke in between kisses saying “I love you.”, “I’m an idiot.” and “I love you” again. 

“It’s okay, Chim.” she softly tapped his chest, signaling to sit back up. And they were seated once more.

“What’re we gonna do about Tae?” She felt so worried about that. Feeling like she played him. He was an amazing person and a true friend to both of them. The thought of breaking his heart terrified her. It made Jimin upset too, they both cared about him.

“I don’t know.. But we’ll figure it out.”

He laughed bitterly. “You know what? Tae knew. He always told me to stop being an idiot with you. I should’ve listened. But yeah.. I know he’ll understand.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. And whatever happens I’ll make it right with him. He’s my brother. Brothers might fight but they’re still brothers.”

She pinched the side of his arm. “No fighting over anyone! Not ever!”

“I meant that figuratively, angel.”

“Wait. Did you just quote High School Musical?” They both burst into laughter.

Then he smiled at her endearingly and pulled her into the tightest hug ever.

“Let’s just stay like this for a while.”

...

@world-moon​​ @nopedopebts  had requested to be tagged so here you go :)

A/N: I’m sorry for this long ass part. Thank you soo much if you bared with me and read it. I seriously hope you liked it because I struggled a lot with the ending, I hope it was good and satisfactory. I’d really like it if you guys let me know what you think and who would you have liked Y/N to end up with. 

[killian-whump]

OUAT 3x05: Rewatch Liveblog

Hello, my friends! It is I, Killian-Whump, here with another Rewatch Liveblog.

This one's for episode 3x05, "Good Form" - and let me tell you right now, it might be awhile before you see another one, because it will probably take me 15 years to GIF all of the whump, angst and sexy faces that appear in this episode.

BUT BEFORE THAT HAPPENS!!!

I gotta watch the episode. So let's settle in, click the link below... and do just that.

Looks like we’re starting off this episode with Neal getting thrown in a cage, for all of you who are into that kind of thing.

Normally, I would be one of those people, but I'm not really into Neal... and what the hell is up with these camera angles? Meh. Could be better.

OH GUYS! GUYS! This is the Lost Boy whose face annoys me. I thought he was in S6, but here he is here. Is he maybe in both seasons? I'll have to keep an eye out for him when I get to S6 in my rewatch and spontaneously combust.

Aww, my baby’s having some unexpected feels over there while Emma's talking about her days in the foster system.

Aww, look at him trying to share his feels and connect with another human being on more than a superficial level. Bless him.

Look at him getting shot down because Emma assumes it's just an attempt to get in her pants.

Aaaaaand look at Dave telling him he's nothing but a pirate.

Like I said, I'll be GIFing this shit until sometime in the 2030s.

Oh, look! It's Navy men! What kind of flashback could this be?

Why, that looks like a Naval Officer, someone of good standing, with a jaunty little ponytail and a spry bounce in his step. Who could it-

OH MY GOD YOU GUYS, IT'S HOOK

"Perhaps you mean younger brother." 'I MEANT WHAT I SAID, BITCH'

Ummm.... So... 'Only YOU can navigate us on this hero's journey!' 'Where are we going?' 'BITCH, I CAN'T TELL YOU'

OH GOD, GUYS, THAT BRIGHT SHINING SMILE FULL OF HOPE AND PROMISE T_T It kills me every time I see it. Colin could literally light up a city block in a blackout with that smile of his. We rarely get to see Colin's smile on Hook's face, but he uses it to such great effect right here. Bless.

...and here we are back to angsty, lusty, almost downright creepy staring at Emma XD

WHY IS HE FUCKING LIKE THIS (that’s what she said)

Hahahahaha, Snow. "Thanks for the advice." Like, she literally could not sound less dismissive if she tried. She gives so few fucks about Hook's thoughts, she might as well have walked over there and taken all of his OWN fucks away, as well. 'Nope, sorry, now NO ONE has any fucks for you. Not even you.'

My fucks... Now I have none T_T

I wish someone at the camp had answered WHY Hook had to go with David for more rope with, "You're freaking us all out, actually." XD

"What would you like to yell at me about now, Dave?" I love it when Hook calls him Dave, haha :D

Dave: "But if I do die-" Hook: "WHEN" Hahahahaha, you little shit <3

Aaaaaaaaand a swing and a miss. Dave, that was the absolute lamest attempt at whumping Hook that I have ever seen, AND I HAVE SEEN THEM ALL. Multiple times.

"Mate? Mate!" Umm, try his name? We know you know it. You used it thirty seconds ago.

LOL, I like to think Hook was, like, pouring Rum on Dave's mouth like a five year old trying to feed a sleeping parent or something.

Aww, he plays David so well. Hook: "No, it's too dangerous." Dave: 'Well, now I HAVE to do it.'

Liam, you ass. "Haha! That was close!"

Liam: "Employ the Pegasus!" And all the sailors, who obviously know what the Pegasus is, all spring into action, repeating the order and following it. So they all KNOW what the Pegasus Sail is and how to use it, while Killian, the LIEUTENANT and second in command here, has no fucking clue what's going on, what the Pegasus is, that the ship can fly, or where they’re going.

Regina: "How do we know you're not lying?" Hook: "Oh, you don't." Aaaaaaaaand he is. Hook: "But I'm not." Yes, he is.

Dave's TOTALLY OBVIOUS "goodbye forever beloved family" goodbyes XD

Ah, Liam, you stubborn arse. Listen to the strange demon child. Listen to your brother. Spoiler Alert: He never listens.

Oh, look. It's time for "Conversations with Pan That Are Somehow the Most Homoerotic Thing Ever Put on Television That Aren't Overtly Gay OR Sexual at All."  FYI: If sexual innuendos about Captain Pan bother you, you’re gonna want to skip to the next line break. I’m just saying.

Creepy silhouettes. Darkness. Pan: "Come back and work for me." Work? Is that what we're calling it now? Pan: "Like the old days." TELL US MORE ABOUT THE OLD DAYS. Hook: "I don't miss the old days." Great, but TELL US ABOUT THEM ANYWAY.

BLIP! Sudden Closeness Alert.

"We've known each other a very long time, Killian. We've done business before." TELL US ABOUT IT IN GREAT DETAIL OR ISTG

Pan: "You know me." Pan: *whoooosh* Pan: *appears directly behind Killian* Pan: "I like action." Hook: *closes his eyes* Hook: *licks his lips* Hook: *hangs his head* HE LIKES ACTION BACK THERE. BEHIND YOU. BUTT ACTION. I FUCKING SAID IT. I ain’t taking it back.

Hook: *turns to face Pan* Pan: *moves around to be behind him again* That's... I mean... I don't even have to make the innuendos myself here, do I? IT'S BUTT STUFF. I'M THINKING ABOUT BUTT STUFF.

Pan: "I want to see your hook inside his body." WHY DOES HE FUCKING SAY IT LIKE THAT?!?! Like he's a fucking expert at things he wants to see inside people's bodies.

Get a little closer there, Pan. If you even can.

Oh, sorry. There is literally no way you could possibly get any closer to him without putting your SELF inside his BODY.

AND THEY'RE ALONE. THIS ISN'T NECESSARY. THIS CLOSE TALKING ISN'T NEEDED. NO ONE NEEDS TO WHISPER. IT DOESN'T NEED TO BE HUSH HUSH.

THIS DOESN'T NEED TO BE WHATEVER THE FUCK IT IS.

BUT IT IS.

JFC even though I've seen this scene a frankly very embarrassing number of times, EVERY time Pan grabs Killian's flask, I always think he's grabbing something else with that sudden jerking motion. And then he pulls the flask up into the shot and I'm like. "Oh. Oh, that's right."

Pan: "Have a drink." Hook's reaction. GODS ABOVE... Pan: "You know it always helps you think."

AHHHHHHHH and then we see why Pan was whispering, and why he put the flask in Killian's hand just then, because Pan knew Dave was approaching and he wanted Hook to look bad in front of him.

...and for butt reasons. FIGHT ME, BITCHES. You know I’m right.

Yeah.

Yeah, sure.

That fucking plant dripping black shit ominously looks like medicine.

Suuuuuuuuuuuure.

EVEN KILLIAN SAYS IT DOESN'T LOOK LIKE MEDICINE.

"You choose to believe that boy over our King?" Well, to be fair, that boy fucking LIVES there.

Oh, Liam. Liam, listen to your brother. Liam, don't. Liam...

*siiiiiiiiiiiiiiiigh*

Every. Fucking. Time. I. Watch. This. Episode. He never listens.

Annoying face time again. I wish Regina would just rip his fucking hear-

Oh, there we go. Thanks, boo.

Snow: "The cost can't be this family." Emma: "It won't be." As long as you stop being a judgmental stick in the mud, MOM.

Aww... My baby, giving as wide a berth to the Dreamshade as he can. I love how afraid of it he is. He's so precious.

Ooooh... Swordpoint. This is a much better attempt at whumping our pirate, Dave. I commend you for not giving up after the first try went so poorly.

AHHHHHH and Dave backs him up against the Dreamshade he's so afraid of. LOVE IT.

Oooh, suckerpunch. And Dave's out for the count.

Pan: "Maybe you shouldn't have goaded him into it." LISTEN, YOU JUMPED UP LITTLE SHIT... And Killian just falls right into the trap, just accepting that he's to blame and trying to explain why he did such an awful thing... Oh, my pretty pirate baby T_T

Pan: "Don't leave the island unless you're willing to pay it." Ahhhh, you tricky little devil. You TOLD him, but you didn’t tell him.

Also, remember how Pan said to Baelfire last episode that all the pieces were where he wanted them... I wonder what his purpose was for bringing Killian to the island and setting all this up. He likely knew the resulting cascade of dominoes would bring Killian back... and back again. But why?

Whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy?

(Hint: It's butt stuff.)

Awwww!!! They got the message to Henry!!! :D Yay!!! Success!!!

And they only had to rip a young annoying-faced kid's heart out to do it :)

And now the show would like to rip all of OUR hearts out with a touching scene of brotherly love and agonizing death and beautiful crying faces.

"I will follow you... to the ends of the earth, brother." T_T STOP IT

T_T

T_T

T_T

Damn show.

AWWWWWWWW. He's so cute, suiting up and "bloody hell"ing and pulling a bandana over his face for the task ahead.

Sweet peanut, facing his fears and hacking away at the Dreamshade.

Awww, the way he looks himself over afterwards, and looks soooo relieved that he's emerged unscathed. Such a fraidy cat. I fucking love it <3

"I didn't do it for you, mate." <3

Regina's so sorry she turned to see what was going on back there, lol.

Snow: "I'm not complaining, but what was that-" Snowing: *more kissing* Emma: "Okay, I'M complaining." :D Regina: "What I wouldn't give for another sleeping curse." HAHAHAHA <3

Awwww, Dave giving his future bro and maybe kinda sorta mate some credit. ...and Hook looking so shy and embarrassed by the attention. Bless <3

Oh. Ohhh. Ohoh!!

CS Kiss Time. As kisses go, this is a damn good one, because it has Colin O'Donoghue in it and Hook in it and Killian Jones in it and... it also has Emma grabbing him by his lapels and yanking him to her forcefully and keeping him there until she's damn good and ready to let him go and that speaks to me on a deep, primal level and did I mention that Colin's in this scene?

...and the way he looks so fucking BLOWN AWAY afterwards. Like, that boy's brain is SAUCE right now and I love every second of it. THAT... That is a man who has been kissed within an inch of his life and that is how a man should always look when a Domme lady is done with him :)

"A one-handed pirate with a drinking problem." LISTEN, YOU WALKING COAT HANGER...

By the way, this "Neal's alive and in Neverland!" cliff hanger here goes down in history as one of the lamest ones ever, seeing as Hook ends up telling the secret, like, literally 30 seconds later in show-time.

More Neal in a cage.

Pan: "Hang him up, over there. Next to the other one." Oh, how ominous...

WHO COULD BE IN THE OTHER CAGE?!??! We'll have to wait to find out!!!

Although, thankfully, you all already know... considering it'll be over a decade before I finish GIFing this episode and actually watch the next one... T_T

Pew Pew Pew Peeeeeeeeeeeew

[ramheavenandhell]

Last Christmas…

AN: Decided to write a cliché angsty/romancey Christmas fanfiction for you guys. I hope you like it :) Warnings: Rick/Morty, heartbreak and angst, but Happy Ending Summary: "Last Christmas, I gave you my heart…" Maybe this year, Morty gets a nice present in return. (And no, this isn't a song fic.)

Last Christmas… Christmas was different this year somehow. Jerry had been decorating the house on the outside and inside and was more excited about the season than the rest of the family combined. However, that was completely normal. No, it had nothing to do with the childish and spirited family father. The problematic rather rested with the oldest and the youngest of the household: Rick and Morty. Though, if Summer was honest, this all had started last year already. She had no idea what exactly had went down between the two and at first, she had assumed that they had been in a fight. After last year's Christmas Eve, the two had been avoiding each other for a while. However, even after starting to act normal again a few weeks later, it was undeniable that whatever had happened had changed something permanently in their relationship. So, it must have been something more than just a petty argument. Summer was the only one who had even noticed this though and she tried to question her brother about it without any success. Getting her grandfather to share any information about it would be an impossible task – especially since this seemed to be some emotional stuff – and so she didn't even try to make the futile attempt. As such, she could only watch Morty constantly spacing out. It was obvious that while he had been holding it together the entire year that whatever had happened last Christmas was starting to resurface in his thoughts again. While the change was less subtle in Rick, he also acted slightly different and probably also couldn't help but be reminded of it again. If she would just know what had happened, she might have been able to help them, but as things were, the two would just have to deal with their problems themselves. Summer just hoped that they would get this resolved soon because it seriously bothered her to see them like this…

Again, Morty stared into nothingness as he sat on the couch, only being ripped out of his thoughts as his sister elbowed him gently in the side. He could read worry in her face and gave her a reassuring smile to show that he was fine…even if he didn't feel fine at all. He couldn't really help but think about last Christmas again, now that the festive days were returning. Last year he had wanted to give Rick a special present…but it was a mistake. Morty had given his heart to the man and was rejected rather harshly. "What the fuck, Morty! I'm you grandfather for fuck's sake! What's wrong with you?!" It had taken him such a long time to muster up the courage to confess his love to Rick and he had honestly thought that his feelings might be returned or he wouldn't even have attempted to do that. For a long time he had been searching for hints that his grandfather maybe loved him, too, and after some more disastrous adventures that they had been through, he had been convinced that his feelings hadn't been entirely one-sided. However, he had been wrong. And he had ruined their relationship because things weren't the same between them anymore after that. He wished that he had some sort of invention with which he could just erase last year's Christmas. Not only erasing Rick's memory of it but also his own. Surely, his grandfather had a gadget like that somewhere in the garage, but Morty hadn't really dared to look for it. He sighed once more as he wallowed in regret and self-hatred for having done something stupid like that and wondered how many years it would take before he would finally not feel like shit on Christmas anymore. Maybe that would never happen… For now, he would have to worry getting through this season while trying to act normal in front of the rest of the family. He wasn't doing a very good job though since Summer seemed to notice that something was off with him. Thankfully, she stopped questioning him about it. There was no way that he could tell his sister that he had confessed his undying love to their grandfather and sulked now because he was shot down. He couldn't ever tell that to anyone!

Rick was the last one to join the family at the table for Christmas dinner. He threw a quick greeting to their guests – namely Jerry's parents and that one dude that was also there over the last years, though he never got why nor did he care – before taking a seat. His eyes fell on Morty who sat right next to him and avoided eye contact at all costs, looking like he wanted be anywhere but here right now. Of course, Rick knew that it was solely because of his presence that the boy felt so uncomfortable. His daughter and the idiot were blissfully unaware of their son's squeamish behavior. It was probably for the better though. Last year, his grandson had told him that he loved him. And not in the cute way that grandkids love their grandparents. No, he meant in a far more intimate and romantic way. And Rick had…reacted rather harshly. Which was the reason why Morty was acting the way that he was now. The thing was that he hadn't really meant to hurt the boy and he really regretted that he had yelled at him like that. He was sure that it was for the best though, that Morty didn't really know what he asked for and that he needed to see that they couldn't do this. That it is wrong! However, seeing his grandson suffering through the entire year as he did, even if they still went back to their adventures together, made him think that maybe he was the one in the wrong this time. They hadn't talked about this since, but Rick thought that they really needed to. He wanted to clear this up properly and he'd do it this Christmas.

Morty wearily followed Rick into the garage. His grandfather had told him that he had a special present for him and needed to show it to him here. It eerily reminded him of last year, when he was the one who told Rick the same thing and gave him his heart right here only for it to be broken. Yet it was obvious that this was just an excuse to have a talk under four eyes with him. "Morty, we need to talk." Rick started. "About last year." Oh no! Morty didn't want to talk about that. He just wanted to forget that it had ever happened. Why did Rick have to rip open that old wound? "Please, Rick. Just don't…" "No, Morty. We are gonna talk about this and we're gonna talk about it now." Rick interrupted him. He quickly took a gulp from his flask before he began. "Listen, Morty. Grandpa doesn't give much of a crap about morals. Heck, I keep preaching to you how those are only stupid social constructs. But that doesn't change that there's laws on this planet and you're my grandson so this—" he was gesturing between them "—is not accepted. And—" "Yeah, I get it, Rick!" Now it was Morty's turn to break through his grandfather's monologue. "It's wrong and I'm gross. I know that! You're not telling me anything new here, Rick. And I'm sorry, okay? But I just can't help how I feel!!" The boy turned away and was angry with himself for feeling tears welling up in his eyes. Great time to get emotional like this and then right in front of Rick on top of it! Even if Morty tried to suppress it, Rick could hear a sob. Seeing his grandson cry was always something that he felt bad about, but this was just heartbreaking. It wasn't his intention to hurt Morty, he just wanted what was best for him and felt like he needed to get this clear. He needed to bring his point across that this wasn't just okay, that it wasn't accepted on this version of earth and that being together wasn't simple and wouldn't be all rainbows and sunshine like he thought Morty was probably expecting. However, it was a dumb assumption that the teen wasn't grasping the full impact that this sort of relationship between them would have. Rick knew that Morty valued morals and was always intent on acting "righteous" or behaving in accordance to the social norms that he grew up with, but he was aware of the consequences that being together with his grandfather would have. And despite knowing and even despite being given the cold shoulder by Rick one year ago, Morty still loved him. And that knowledge moved something inside Rick. Even if he had always kept telling himself that he didn't care about the boy, tried to drink himself into oblivion every time when his thoughts about his grandson wandered south, even if he lived in denial about his emotions towards him, he couldn't deny anymore that he liked having Morty around. He wanted the boy to be around him. He needed Morty. Fuck it, he loved him!! And he was done with pretending that he wasn't and holding back any longer! "Morty, look at me." The boy only shook his head and refused the request, his shoulders trembling slightly as he still tried to hold back anymore sobs from escaping. Growing slightly frustrated, Rick grabbed his arm and made him turn around to face him. However, Morty still didn't look at him, head held low and his eyes clenched shut tight as tears were streaming down his cheeks. Rick's fingers covered the wet tracks as he grabbed the soft round cheeks and angled Morty's face upwards. Whatever the brunet had expected would happen, this wasn't on his list. His eyes snapped open in shock as he felt something touch his lips and saw Rick's face right in front of him. After they parted again seconds later, Morty's brain was still short-circuiting. "Wha-wha…?" "W-well, M-Mo-Morty…" A slight flush appeared on Rick's cheeks as he became flustered over the emotional "crap" that he was about to say. "L-last year you gave me a-a very special present and I'm sorry that I reacted rather-that I was being an ass about it. So anyways, th-this year it's my turn make up for it and to-uh to give you a special present in return…i-if you still want me that is." Morty looked at him stunned and it took a while until what Rick had said was fully processed by his brain and finally reached home. When it did, a bright smile broke out on his face that made Rick's heart skip a beat and he flung his arms around his grandfather's neck, pulling him down in another kiss. Without hesitation, it was returned. Their lips slid together, moving in massaging motions, pressing so tightly together as if they never wanted to part again, as if they wanted to fuse together and become one. The teen was sure that he had never been as happy as this in his life. This was the best Christmas gift that he could have ever wished for. Everything that had happened last year was forgotten and he was sure that every Christmas to come he would remember this wonderful moment – he was going to cherish this precious memory for all eternity. After few minutes of making out, they pulled apart again, but Morty still held onto Rick. "I love you." He whispered dreamily, despite having to catch his breath again. He was so glad that he could finally say these words without feeling ashamed. However, what came next was an even better present. "I love you, too, Morty." Rick replied without stutter, hesitation or making an awkward face while saying it. It was honest. He really meant what he said and Morty could clearly see that in Rick's eyes. This year's Christmas was truly the best!

AN: This was a byproduct of being tortured by my coworkers with having to listen to 20 different versions of WAM's "Last Christmas" for several hours over the course of several days. And please don't feel offended if you like that song, but I have to say that I was so overexposed to it the last years that I started to develop feelings of aggression for it -_- Also sorry, that the story is so short. I still hope that you liked this little gift. Wish you all a Merry Rickmas!!

[fymoanstax]

Tell Me You Need Me

60. And 91. With wonho! Something angsty if you could! Love your writing!

This was extremely crappy and not angsty because I’m not good at angst. If the requester doesn’t like it please feel free to message me and I’ll try again! 

-Admin Ponyo 

“Are you going to talk to me?” There were no visible emotions on your face as you sat on the opposite end of the table from your husband. There were no words to be exchanged between the two of you anymore. Actions spoke louder than words and Wonho had been doing all the talking for months on end behind your back. You refused to speak another word to him. Instead you slowly slid the stack of papers in front of you across the table to him. The bold, italicised words written at the top of the first sheet made it all too real for Wonho.

Complaint for Divorce  

“So this is how it’s going to end? You’re not even going to let me explain myself? You’re walking out on our marriage. We love each other Y/N. I love you and I know you love me.” You wanted to scream and cry and hit him all at the same time. He was right though, you did love him and you always would. If you didn’t love him you wouldn’t have married him in the first place. God why did you have to think about it now. You remember your wedding day like it was yesterday.

“Are you ready, baby?” You turn away from the mirror to face your father with a nervous smile on your face.

“Do I look okay dad?” There are tears forming in your father’s eyes as you twirl slowly letting him get a full look at your dress. It nearly cost him an arm and a leg but seeing you so happy made it worth every penny. You were sporting a floor-length ball gown with a sweetheart neckline. The bodice was decorated with small diamonds that were scattered all over. It was a simple dress but it nearly made you cry on the spot when you tried it on and you knew it was the one. Your veil was short, attached to a small headpiece in the shape of a tiara. You weren’t going to tell anyone but under your dress you were wearing a pair of converse because you didn’t want to risk tripping while walking down the aisle. For the entire month before the wedding you went makeup free to avoid breaking out or dry skin on your big day. Only today did you opt for a natural make up look which was barely even noticeable. Everything looked perfect.

“There’s only one bride I’ve ever seen in my life that compares to how beautiful you look right now and that was your mother.” Kind of like she knew you were talking about her your mother waltzed into the room wiping away a few tears.

“I can’t believe my little girl is all grown up and marrying the love of her life. He better treat you right otherwise I’ll put him in his place just like I did with your father.” You always wanted to experience true love like your parents but you always thought something like that was unattainable. Until you met Wonho. He swept you off your feet in less than a week. You met in a movie theater that was completely empty except for the two of you. It was a horror movie that had been in theaters for a while now so it wasn’t very popular anymore and you just so happened to have reserved two seats right next to each other.

You were too embarrassed to admit it but you were scared. It was only when a jump scare happened and Wonho jumped, spilling his entire tub of popcorn in the process, that you finally spoke up. The two of you decided to leave halfway through the movie and get some dinner instead. It all seemed to move quickly from there. One date turned into multiple dates. Official titles of boyfriend and girlfriend came soon after. He ended up meeting your parents. You dated for 3 years before he popped the question and wedding planning took you a year. Now here you were, arm linked with your father as he walked you down the aisle to the man of your dreams.

Your hands were sweating as your father handed you off to Wonho but thankfully his palms were equally as sweaty as yours. It seemed like everyone that looked at you today was on the verge of tears. Wonho mouthed how stunning you looked and you couldn’t help but blush and return the compliment by whispering that he looked absolutely dashing in his all black suit. You were so happy that day. So sure that your marriage would last forever and that it was you and Wonho against the world until death do you part.

But now you were here waiting for the man that you fell in love with even more every time you looked at him to sign divorce papers. Wonho didn’t even pick up the stack of papers. He wanted nothing to do with them. All he wanted was his family to remain where they belonged which was together in this house that they had made a home.

“Hoseok. You need to sign the papers so I can go. I told the babysitter I would only be gone for an hour and it’s already been 45 minutes.” Oh fuck how it hurt him to hear you call him by his actual name.

“Please don’t call me that. I’m Wonho. Your Wonho. Your husband. We can work through this. I’ll never do it again. Don’t do this to our family.” You scoffed right in front of him. You had done nothing but what was best for you and your child. He was the one that ruined it all and now he was trying to play the victim? Trying to guilt trip you? Not on your watch.

“I didn’t ruin anything. It was all you. You are the one that decided I wasn’t enough for you anymore! You made the decision to go and sleep with any woman that offered you sex on a silver platter. I was here raising our child and being a loyal wife. You’re right about one thing though. You’ll never do it again but only because I won’t give you the chance to. If you really cared about us you would sign the papers.”

Wonho skims over the first few pages in the pile, stopping to read whatever catches his eye. One part in particular stands out to him, something you secretly hoped he wouldn’t notice.

“Y/N...what does this say? Something about an u-unborn child. Are you pregnant? I-Is it mine?” Your first reaction is to wrap your arms around yourself protectively. Of course Wonho wouldn’t hurt you but any mention of your baby immediately had you in protection mode.

“Of course the baby is yours. I’m not you. I don’t sleep with other people while I’m married.” Wonho visibly recoils at the mention of his worst mistake.

“I’m not signing the papers. I’m gonna be here for you and for our little girl Sohee and for this baby. I want to be in my childrens lives and nobody, not even a judge in a courtroom, can take that away from me.”

“It’s all in the papers Wonho. We do joint custody I get weekdays and you can pick Sohee up from preschool on Friday and keep her the entire weekend. We switch off every year on holidays and long breaks. I’ll send you ultrasound pictures and you can be present at the birth. The baby will get your last name but that is it. That’s the best I can offer you. Take it or leave it.” Wonho is growing frustrated by the second. This isn’t how things are supposed to be. He’s supposed to be there for you and your children. He can’t stand the idea of not being there for major milestones.

Bringing Sohee home from the hospital was a dream come true. Wonho now had a family of his own and he would do everything in his power to make sure no harm ever came to either one of you. He thought back to the painstakingly slow 14 hours you were in labor. Hearing the cries of his little girl as she came into the world. You were somehow still beautiful and glowing after hours of pain and pushing. He was there for everything. The first bottle feeding, diaper change, bath, steps, and words. To know he wasn’t going to experience that with his second child was heartbreaking.

“Please think about what you’re doing Y/N. you’re taking two children away from their father. If you do this you’re no better than I am. You’re a bad mother.” Wonho regretted the words as soon as they came out of his mouth.

“Don’t you think I know that already? Don’t you think I asked myself what I could have done so wrong that you had to go out and have sex with other women? I had to think about it every night you didn’t come home. I was reminded of it whenever you walked through the door smelling like another woman.” Wonho approached you slowly. How badly he wanted to comfort you, hold you, and tell you how you were absolutely enough for him. You would never let him get that close to you again though. He broke your heart and you weren’t foolish enough to let it happen again.

“I’m so sorry baby. I didn’t mean it. I messed up. I slept with other women when I had the perfect one waiting for me at home. I’m so sorry I did this to you. I never meant fo this to happen. I’m sorry I hurt you. I’m s-sorry.” By the end of his apology Wonho had tears streaming down his face and as much as it hurt you to see that you felt like he deserved to feel miserable just like all the times you felt the same way when he didn’t come home after work.

“You’re not sorry that it happened Hoseok. You’re just sorry you got caught.” It was true. If he had continued sleeping with other women behind your back for months who knows if it would’ve stopped if it weren’t for you catching him in the act. You had already had your suspicions so you told him you’d be spending a few days in a nearby city with your parents so that they could spend time with Sohee. Wonho had been taking on longer shifts at his job so he told you he would have to stay behind. You did take Sohee with your parents but you also headed home early by yourself. You hadn’t even walked 2 feet into your home when your suspicions were confirmed. The undeniable sound of a woman moaning Wonho’s name and your own husband praising how good she felt around him and how her body was perfectly made for him made your blood boil.

You marched your way right up to the bedroom you shared with your husband every night the first few years of your marriage. The bedroom right across the hall from where your child slept. Did he have no shame? Pleasuring another woman in the same bed where both of your children were conceived and where you shared countless nights of romance together. He was so lost in the pleasure that he didn’t even notice you in the doorway of the bedroom. It wasn’t until both him and the woman he was cheating on you with had come down from their sex induced high that he saw you there. Tears in your eyes and a hand over your mouth. You felt nauseated, maybe it was from your pregnancy or maybe it was the sight of your husband in bed with another woman. You weren’t going to stick around long enough to let him see you in an even more vulnerable and weak state than the one you were already in.

You left and you didn’t look back. You didn’t stop even when he started chasing after you or when he started calling out your name on the busy sidewalk. It was over for him the minute you walked in the door.

“I’ll sign the papers. If you really want me to do it I will. But I want to hear you say you love me.” You look up from the ground straight into Wonho’s eyes. Of course you loved him. He’s the father of your children. Your husband. The love of your life.

“Just one more time.” The look of pain and guilt reflected in his eyes nearly made you break down on the spot.  

“I-I love you so much.” Wonho signed the papers immediately. Let the waterworks begin. You couldn’t hold your tears back anymore. Your marriage was over. Your whole body was wracked by sobs and then but only then did Wonho envelop your entire body in an embrace. The warmth radiating off his body made you feel safe and protected but all you could think of was all the other women that had felt this same embrace.

“I knew what I was doing when I asked you to sign those papers but why does it f-feel so bad.” Would you ever forgive him for what he did? No. Did he deserve another chance? Maybe.

“I know it hurts right now but you’re strong and you’ll get through it for our kids. If you feel like you can’t do it anymore I’m always here. It’s you and me against the world remember? That’ll never change.” You nod your head slowly and wipe your tears away before stepping away from him. The pile of papers sit idly on the table until you grab them and head for the front door without another word. You have your hand on the door knob and you’re so close to just getting out of there. Don’t look back. Don’t look back. You’re weak. Your hand falls at your side and you turn around. There’s a glimmer of hope and so much love in Wonho’s eyes when you look back at him. It’s the same way he looked at you while you walked down the aisle to him.

“T-Tell me you need me.” Your grip on the divorce papers is so tight that the knuckles on both hands turn white.

A/N: Kind of an open end I guess,,,,,,,,,,,,Sorry it was bad.

[lamptracker]

FIC: Sweet pea (Single Dad! Harry Holland)

At long last, here it is. An anon requested a single dad au of one of the twins (I picked Harry) getting upset when they make their daughter cry. Like I said I’ve been working a LOT the last few days, so I hope you like it!

FIC: Sweet pea

Summary: Single Dad Harry Holland gets upset at his daughter.

Warnings: This is kinda angsty.

Harry Holland will be the first one to tell you: Being a single parent is not easy.

He didn’t plan for this. Nobody does. He was doing a lingerie shoot with an up-and-coming model, one thing led to another. A year later he was summoned to court to take a paternity test. When he learned he was the father of her baby, the mother surrendered her parental rights and moved to Los Angeles to jumpstart her career…

...leaving Harry, barely a child himself, with a months-old baby girl named Eleanor.

Dom and Nikki were a big help, as were his brothers. But it wasn’t always easy, trying to do this on his own while he was still trying to figure out his own life.

“So, I’ll see you Friday afternoon then? Okay, great. I’ll just ask Mum if she can watch Ellie for me, and we’ll get those headshots done...okay, Harrison, will do.” Harry hung up the phone and smiled to himself. His photography business was really picking up steam. He worked as a film editor but photography was his true passion. His flat was filled with pictures he’d taken of Ellie over the years. His favorite was the one of her blowing out the candles on her last birthday; five pink candles stood tall as Ellie puffed out her little cheeks, extinguishing the flames.

“Ellie!” Harry called down the hall. “Ellie, it’s almost time for supper, go get washed up.”

“Okay, Daddy!”

Harry pulled some chicken nuggets and French fries out of the oven; he scooped some onto a plate for Ellie and got her a cup of juice. He was in the middle of fixing his own plate when he heard the toilet flush; it was soon followed by a loud, “Oops!”

Frowning, Harry made his way to the bathroom. There, Ellie was standing next to the toilet, peering down the hole with a furrowed brow.

“What happened, El?”

“I dropped my toothbrush in there,” she said, “and I went to get it out but I hit the handle instead and it disappeared!”

What happened next haunted Harry for a very long time.

He sighed, screwed his eyes shut, pinched the bridge of his nose, and shouted - he shouted:

“Eleanor Joanne Holland, how could you do such a thing? Now I have to call the plumber, and that’s going to cost me an arm and a leg. What were you even doing with your toothbrush anyway, we’re getting ready to eat dinner! I…”

“I’m sorry, Daddy, I didn’t mean to, I…” Ellie’s lower lip quivered and fat tears rolled down her cheeks.

Harry could physically feel his heart break in two. He did this. He made her cry.

This little girl was his entire world. And, in thirty seconds, he crushed hers.

Regret immediately washed over him in waves as he bent down to her level.

“Ellie,” he said softly. “I’m so sorry I shouted at you. I didn’t… I was just upset, that’s all. I know that’s not a good excuse but…”

“Do you still love me, Daddy?” she asked, through tears.

What was left of Harry’s heart shattered again.

“Of course I do, sweet pea! Why wouldn’t I?”

“Because I made a mistake. And I know Mommy doesn’t love me, that’s why she ran away.”

Boy. Harry’s heart, already battered and bruised, was now blown to smithereens.

He took a deep breath and sighed, sitting cross-legged on the bathroom floor.

“Come here, Ellie,” he said, pulling her into his lap. “There are lots of reasons your mum left. You’ll understand them when you’re older. But right now, what you need to know is this: There are lots of people that love you. Your granddad Dom, your granny Nikki, Uncle Sammy, Uncle Paddy, Uncle Tommy. And Uncle Harrison - though, he’s not really your uncle, he’s just a really close friend…”

Ellie sighed. “I love Uncle Harrison. He’s so handsome. I’m gonna marry him someday.”

Harry chuckled quietly. “Well, let’s just get through Kindergarten first, okay? But do you know who loves you more than all of those people put together?”

“Is it you, Daddy?”

“It is me. I love you to the moon and back, Ellie. And just because I get cross with you sometimes, that doesn’t mean I don’t love you. Okay? I’m very sorry I shouted at you.”

“I forgive you, Daddy. I’m sorry I dropped my toothbrush in the toilet.”

“Accidents happen, sweet pea.  I forgive you too.” He kissed her forehead and rubbed the tip of his nose against hers. “I’ve got you a plate ready, why don’t you go ahead and start eating and I’ll call a plumber?”

“Okay, Daddy. Do you think Uncle Tommy’s going to bring me a present from America?”

Harry laughs, loudly this time. “That’s probably a safe bet, sweet pea. He brings you presents from everywhere he goes. You’re spoilt rotten, you are.”

“Yeah, it’s ‘cuz I’m cute.” Ellie softly kissed his cheek. “I love you, Daddy.”

“I love you too, sweet pea. Now go eat, okay?”

As Ellie ran off to the kitchen to eat supper, Harry sighed deeply; he then made two phone calls. The first was to the plumber. The second was to his mother.

“It happens, Harry,” Nikki reassured him. “We all get frustrated with our kids once in awhile. That doesn’t make you any less of a good father, okay?”

“I just… I feel horrible, Mum. She thought I stopped loving her!”

Nikki chuckled softly. “Harry, she’s five. Her worldview is much different than ours. She hasn’t had the experiences we’ve had, so anytime something doesn’t go her way, she doesn’t understand it’s only temporary. We just have to be as patient as we can. I know it’s hard, I’ve been there. Four times, you know. But as long as she understands how much you love her, things will be okay.”

Harry smiled. “Thanks, Mum. Oh, can you watch Ellie on Friday? Harrison needs new headshots done.”

“I’d love to. I’ll pick her up from school that day, I’m on the pick-up list, right?”

“Yes. Thank you so much. Love you.”

“Daddy! I finished my whole dinner!” Ellie proudly held up her empty plate. “Can I have a cupcake?”

“Good job, sweet pea! Of course you can.”

As Harry got a cupcake out of the cupboard, he smiled. He truly did love this little girl with all his heart. Being her dad wasn’t always easy, but it was truly the best thing that ever happened to him.

[like-a-bag-of-potatoes]

Reunited- Finale

A/N: Tenth and final part of Reunited. Sorry it took me so long to get it out, but I always take long to write a final chapter. I've loved writing this series, and i'm really sad that it's ending, but i have new projects i'm working on so. Thank you to all that has read, liked, commented and reblogged this series… you are all fantastic. Also a special shout out to my beta @thorne93, I could not have done this without you.

Characters: Jensen x Reader…… Jack

Warnings: Fluff. (i had intended for this series to be more angsty, but….)

Wordcount: 2129

Catch up HERE

One week was all you had left before Jensen had to leave for Vancouver. It sucked. Like.. really sucked, but you had decided to stay positive. It wasn't like he was leaving forever, he would be home almost every weekend, and you would have more than enough to keep yourself busy while he was gone. Still there was this little part of you that wanted to doubt this whole thing, just end it now, rip the bandaid off so to speak. You didn't though, you had made a promise to Jensen, and to yourself, that you were one hundred percent in, and you intended to keep that promise.

Monday morning Jensen woke up to the smell of bacon and eggs. He didn't even bother to put clothes on before padding his way down the stairs just in his boxers to find you in the kitchen. He was torn between going over and kissing you good morning or just stay back and watch as you made breakfast wearing nothing but his t-shirt from last night. He decided to watch you for a little, but it didn't take long before he couldn't resist you anymore.

“Good morning, beautiful,” he greeted as he walked up and wrapped his hands around you from behind, kissing your neck softly.

“Good morning, handsome,” you said back, turning around in his arms so that you could look at him. He looked gorgeous, like he did every morning, his hair pointing to all odds and ends, the sleepy look on his face and his rough morning voice. And of course being almost naked helped a lot.

“I like this new look on you,” you said teasingly before taking the last bite of your bacon.

“Not like I had any choice.” He chuckled, pointing to the shirt you were wearing.

“You want it back?” you asked, cocking a brow.

“I'm gonna need it back at some point,” he said before standing up, ready to clear the dishes away.

“Fine, have it your way,” you said with a sigh. You stood from your chair and looked him dead in the eye as your hands grabbed the hem of the shirt, smoothly pulling it over your head. Jensen's eyes were blown wide and he was glued in place as he watched you shed your clothes, leaving you in nothing but your black lacy panties. It was really hard not to giggle as you threw the shirt at him before turning around to walk upstairs.

“Screw this,” Jensen said and you heard the clatter as he put his plate back on the counter. You looked over your shoulder and could see Jensen catching up to you, fast. You let out a squeal and then picked up your pace, trying to outrun him, but it was pointless. Before you knew it Jensen had his arms around you.

“Where do you think you’re going?” he all but growled in your ear.

“To put on some clothes,” you said simply, rolling your eyes at him. You couldn't keep up the charade for long though and before you knew it Jensen had thrown you down on your bed, and there was little you could do to keep the smile off of your lips.

**

The rest of your week was spent mostly in that fashion, not leaving the bedroom unless you had to, but when Thursday rolled around, it was time to join the real world again.

First thing you did was go into work to grab some paperwork before heading to the bank to apply for a loan.

“You have an excellent credit score miss (YLN), and I can tell your business is growing and doing very well, but unfortunately there's not enough assets in your company to grant you another loan,” the banker told you after you had showed him all the paperwork and told him about the increase in your workload. He was the one who had granted you a loan when you had wanted to open your business in the first place, so you hoped he would be able to help you now as well.

“Is there anything I can do?” you asked, desperately.

“You can come back in a few months and apply again. You have a contract here that will grant you a steady income, but we need that to be regular before we can grant you a loan. So far you've had only one job for this company and you just signed the contract two months ago,” he explained calmly.

“But… if I don't expand, I won't be able to keep doing these jobs. There simply isn't enough room at my current location,” you told him, hoping you didn't sound as desperate as you were feeling.

“I'm sorry,” he said simply.

“Can I take out a second mortgage on my house?”

“You can, but we still won't be able to give you the amount you’re asking for here.”

“Okay. Well. Thanks for seeing me,” you said politely, standing from your chair and reaching out to shake his hand.

“I'm sorry I couldn't be of any more help,” he offered, taking your hand.

To say you were disappointed would be an understatement. You wanted to scream and yell at the man, but you knew it wasn't his fault, he had rules and guidelines he had to follow. That didn't make you feel any better though.

When you got back home that afternoon you threw your purse at the wall in frustration. You had been in your office at work, trying to come up with a solution for this problem, but you were drawing a blank. You went straight to the liquor cabinet and retrieved your old friend, Jack.

You sat down in your backyard and hoped the golden liquid would help calm your nerves a little.

“I take it the meeting didn't go well?” Jensen asked as he came up behind you.

“Not so much,” you said, taking another sip from your glass. “I didn't hear you come in.” You kept your eyes on him as he came over and knelt down in front of you, a look of concern etched on his handsome features.

“Want to tell me about it?”

You summed up the meeting for him, giving him just the highlights. All the time you talked, he had his eyes fixed on you, giving you his undivided attention, and you had to admit that just having him there put you in a better mood. “I just don't know what to do now. If I don't manage to move to another location, I will have to buy out of the contract with Wendy, and that's gonna cost me a lot of money, on top of what I'll lose in income for the jobs.”

Jensen could see the despair in your eyes and he didn't hesitate to wrap you up in a comforting hug. He knew he could help you out, but he also knew you would never take a hand out from him.

“How about getting an investor?” he suggested as he released the hug.

“I don't know that anyone would want to risk their money in such a small company though,” you said, looking into those beautiful green eyes of his.

“What if I told you I could invest?” he pressed.

You were quiet for a long time before you answered him, weighing your options carefully. “I really do appreciate it, Jay, but I’ve built this business from the ground up by myself and I want to keep doing that. It's like my baby, you know?” you explained, hoping he would understand.

“I figured you would say that, but what kind of boyfriend would I be if I didn't offer?”

“You are the most amazing boyfriend,” you said, a warm smile on your face as you leaned in to place a soft kiss to his lips.

“There was something I wanted to talk to you about,” Jensen said, grabbing your hand in his much larger one.

“That sounds ominous,” you said, but urged him to continue.

“I know this is soon and all, but I wanted to ask you if you wanted to come live with me? I mean, we could live here if you wanted, but my house is bigger and I have a pool and stuff. Of course, if you don't want to live together at all we don't have to, I just wanted to throw it out there…” Jensen kept rambling on so you decided to shut him up.

You grabbed his face and pressed your lips to his, effectively ending his ramblings. “Yes, Jensen, I would love to live with you,” you said as you pulled apart, tears threatening your eyes.

It was a strange feeling when you realized that you had absolutely no doubts what so ever about moving in with him, strange, but good.

“You think we can swing it before I leave on Sunday?” Jensen asked.

“Do I think we can move all of my belongings from this house to yours in three days? Probably not,” you said, giggling a little at his enthusiasm.

“You want to start right now? Or do you want to celebrate?”

“How about we start in the bedroom and we can do a little bit of both?” you suggested.

Jensen wasn't hard to convince, and once again he chased you up the stairs to your bedroom.

**

The next few months flew by in a hurry. Jensen was home nearly every weekend, and even when you had weddings to do, you did get to spend a little time with him.

Long distance was hard, no doubt about it, but it wasn't nearly as bad as you had imagined. You talked on the phone every day, texted as often as you could, Jensen had even sent flowers to your door every once in awhile. One day, when work was piling up on you and everything sucked, he had even sent Rose over with a bottle of Jack. He was perfect in every single way possible, and you couldn't be happier.

Work was still busy and you hadn't figured out a way to open a second location yet, but you had rented a storage room as a temporary solution. You had put your house up for sale and you hoped that once it sold, you would have enough money to get the loan from the bank. But you would have to worry about that later, right now you were waiting for Jensen to come home for his Christmas break, which meant over three weeks together.

“Babe? I'm home,” Jensen shouted as he walked through the doors of your shared house. A smile spread on his plump lips when you appeared, all but running towards him before jumping into his arms. He didn't miss a beat and picked you up, spinning you around before placing you back on the floor and kissing you deeply.

“That was the most perfect, cheeky, rom com moment I've ever had,” you said, a wide grin on your face, a slight giggle in your voice, and sparkles in your eyes.

Jensen couldn't imagine himself happier than he was in that moment, looking down at the most beautiful girl in the world, knowing that he didn't ever want to be without you again. Emotions rushed through his body, making tears well in his emerald orbs. He quickly closed his eyes and pressed his forehead against yours so you wouldn't see him tearing up.

“I love you so much more than I can ever put into words,” he breathed, his voice barely above a whisper.

“Right back at you, Ackles,” you responded, tightening your hold on him.

“Marry me?” he blurted it out without even knowing what he was saying.

“What?” you tilted your head back so you could look at him, not releasing your hold on him. “Are you serious?”

Jensen took a moment to collect his thoughts before he answered. “I am,” he said with confidence. “I hadn't planned on doing this like this, in the hallway or without a ring or anything, but I am sure I want to marry you. We spent 11 years apart, and I missed you every day. This might sound cheesy and all, but I'm absolutely certain that you are it for me. I love you, and I have never been happier than when I'm with you. So yes… I'm sure.”

You looked up at him, searching for any uncertainty in his emerald orbs, but you didn't find any. Your heart was pounding in your chest, butterflies soared through your body. It was soon in a way, but in another way it had been a long time coming. You loved him with all of your heart, and you knew that he would be the only one for you.

“Yes!”

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