#ok I think I've gotten it all out
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I will always be loyal to Yuya.
#yugioh arc v#ygo arc v#arc v#yuya sakaki#declan akaba#reiji akaba#my art#arc v art#i was pretty ambivalent towards declan until he said this out of nowhere in s3 and i was like ok you're kind of insane in a way i respect#the vibe i've always gotten from declan is that he's actually pretty kind and polite#but he comes off as mean/sinister because he has a flat affect and rbf#and i think that extends to his relationships too. yuya is like ugh declan doesn't care about any of this declan doesn't care about us#while internally declan is like yuya is such a good friend :) i'm glad we're working together#it just doesn't read externally. at all.#he doesn't express himself the same way as other people even if he feels things just as strongly#so when he suddenly confesses his undying loyalty it's out of nowhere but it's also just how he is. do you get it
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THE EYHM COLLECTION GROWS!!!! managed to make some space without having to move too much so they can all be together!!
(i made the smaller ones into stickers bc i'm running out of picture frames!! hope that's ok!)
THANK YOU SO MUCH EVERYONE WHO'S GIFTED THESE TO ME THOUGH!!! I'M CALLING ALL OF YOU OUT HERE BECAUSE I LOVE YOU!! ❤❤❤❤❤
*sharp inhale* @eskariolis-con-salsa @oddpizza @woobab @the-little-knight @moon9931 @misdreavusplush @noodletime @witch-tower-au !!!!!!!
hope you all have a good holiday season!! love you all! *MWAH*
#don't worry about the fish tanks they'll keep the kitties company! there's literally almost nowhere else good to put these lmao#but!! i think they look good there at least!! AND IN GENERAL THEY ALL LOOK SO GOOD THANK YOU#BUT NOW AFTER THIS I REALLY NEED TO FIND MORE SPOTS IF I GET MORE EYHMS BECAUSE THERE'S NO SPACE LEFT THERE!#....maybe i can move some of the pokemon posters i have by my bed lol. they're just kinda. there rn.#but yeah!! i never expected people to like this cat this much and i'm kinda freaking out!!! but thank you again so much!!#i'll say it 1000 times if i have to!!!!!!#eyhm stuff#gift eyhms#basically ALL of the gift eyhms i've gotten lmao. there's a couple that're in progress but they'll hopefully join the others soon-ish!#quick side ramble! i've got a couple more drawing things planned this year but they might take a couple days because Chrimbo and all!#but there's a couple pizza tower things/gifts and. maybe finally my About Me post? gotta figure out how i'm gonna make that heh#OK I'VE BEEN TALKING TOO LONG SORRY BUT I'M JUST SO HAPPY ABOUT THESE AAAHHHHHHH
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Eeeeeee one of my best friends that I haven't seen in a few years is going to try to come out to Las Vegas and hang out for part of my birthday trip! So now it won't solely be a "wandering around solo while high as a fucking kite" experience (not for the entire time, anyway)
#make no mistake i will still be very high i am bringing a bunch of edibles#birthday plans#birthday de faye#woo and the friend has never been to las vegas so it'll be fun to walk around and be a dumb tourist with them#i have been saving all year for this amd i am stoked#the only thing that could make it better is if I also had someone joining the trip who would provide me with birthday bonin'#i did extend an offer to d before we stopped talking but obviously there was no interest#no better way to make it clear that someone isn't into you than to extend an offer for a hedonistic sexcation#and get a 'haha I'll think about it' and then nothing else#anyway the friend actually joining me is in no way a sex friend#which is ok i still love hanging out with them and I'll be stoked to see them and show them around#but man i also wish i had someone to have crazy exhilarating birthday vacation monkeysex with#thinking back on it i don't think I've ever actually gotten sex on my birthday#absolute travesty tbh
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ngl gamers, I think I'm gonna inevitably lose to the hormones and depression in the near future XD
Can't bring myself to be active cause I'm using a lot of energy to not vent post all the time. But fuck it, into the tags I go!
#I want NO MESSAGES regarding this. let me just be upset and alone#you spend most of your life trying to not succumb to sick brain but honestly I don't think it's worth it in the long run#my life is for better or worse....decent. but I've lost the drive and happiness to really DO anything a long time ago. like whats the point#the only reason I havent killed myself yet is cause Im too lazy (and dont have access to a gun for a quick getaway)#and I'm saying all this DESPITE having stuff to look forward to in the near future. it's like AUGH whats the POINT IM always gonna suffer#why does mental health take such a toll on ppl. this shit sucks ass. and I still feel excited for things in the future too? somehow?#but I also really want to die so. idk man. idk. maybe if I fall in love with someone then I can be distracted but all my walls are up#what's the point in anything anymore. *I* have to take the steps to improve myself and my situation#and I'd rather die. anyways who wants to make a pact that once we reach 40 we will marry each other#that might be fun#also my brain has gotten so bad that I am literally considering joining a hiking club to get out more and I FUCKING HATE HIKING#but I should probably do something out of my comfort zone to push myself and who knows maybe I will find a new passion#but let me tell you about the anxiety - oh BOY it's starting to act up again. hahahha#ah well sometimes you just need to scream your feelings out in the tags to get a lil clarity from the brain fog#one day I will fucking die/kill myself but for now I'll just try to make the best out of. whatever the hell this stupid life is. *shrug*#(but hey if any professional hitmen are reading this. feel free to. heh. you know ;) )#also I need to get back to art#gotta do my paid work and that one pic I lined months ago. and clay stuff *continues to bed rot another week because hahahahahahaha*#ah I wish I didn't fail all those years ago. then I would be free. I wish I was free#ok goodnight I promised myself that I would do paid work when I wake up tomorrow so hopefully no more migraines -pray emoji-
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mha is like an estranged awkward father to me. i try not to make my connection to it obvious but i secretly care a lot about it (sometimes against what i desire) and when ppl talk serious shit about it i get defensive. like yea i understand that it's not the best series writing-wise, it's got a good amount of problems and that its mere connection to me makes me cringefail ... but i'll always find some sort of unexplainable comfort in its arms despite its flaws bc there's still a good amount of it to genuinely enjoy without a constantly ironic state of mind that all media must be critiqued with nowadays and i don't expect anyone to understand this odd relationship but myself
#every time i hear that mha fans are cringe and have bad taste i'm like well yeah. but also hey. watch it#like protecting my pathetic father who does not need protecting but i'll do it anyway bc it just feels like i should#it's not at all a horrible series the way everyone labels it and i think its popularity caused such a societal whiplash#like oh it's mainstream now! time to pick on every flaw it has and reduce it to typical shounen shit#without addressing its actually decent and sometimes stellar aspects#it is not as overwhelmingly enjoyed like certain anime i've gotten into lately but that's ok. i'm fine with that#it's a mid to mid-good series with good characters (with exceptions) and great artwork and ok storytelling#i remember when mha was super praised and considered incredible like 5 years ago .. lol how times change#anyway. just wanted to type this out bc i think mha fans get an unfairly bad rep sometimes for doing nothing all that out of the ordinary#just for having an interest in a not-very-enlightening piece of media#and that kinda sucks#also bc i started watching mob psycho and it's really fucking good LMFAOOOO#bnha#mha#becki rambles about stuff
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want to cut my hair again like you wouldn't believe. What are the possible consequences of going bald
#100% секретный дневник левы НЕ ЧИТАЙ#actually i dont mean bald i just mean all one guard length#but hhhhh maybe i'm in an awkard stage maybe not i just CANNOT live like this#middle part is frustrating because it's not perfect in the way it sits side part is frustrating because i look like a girl#i feel like i could go all in with the 4 and then sorta texture a bit with the 2 guard HOWEVER having used the 4 previously. i know#how short that is. it might not look good so i worry#the bright side is it would grow out a bit by the time of the parade but augh i hate this#i'm currently a tightly wound ball of rage sorry. i didn't eat much of anything 2day#tried to call the hospital to get help with the letter/consulation thing preceding top surgery and they were NOT OPEN so idk if they will#be open tomorrow or not. the passage of time has gotten very vague all of a sudden#iiiiiii do not think i am doing well. lol. idk why though! god forbid any of it have a reason#i almost wish i'd relapse just so i could like. eat food again#idk i don't think it would solve it but i feel in my heart it might make things easier#buuuut because relapse is Bad For Me i guess i have to avoid it. well i want to anyways.#one bad day would not a reset make but my previous day happened this year already so...#i dunno it's been so long that i feel like it's not valid or whatever cause it was at an age where i can say it was a 'phase'#.............. i dunno what to do with that information. anyways.#i mean so what if i went all in on it again anyways? i kinda miss it lol. it's not like i could do any serious harm??#(potential infections aside.)#i just want to be creative and i CANT because my stupid brain will NOT think of anything#and the majority of what i have concretely written of this was written... get this .... right when i was trying to stay clean at first#correlation does not equal causation ........ sighs#i feel like i'm fighting a losing battle because i WANT IT to be that bad again#i've never really regretted it & it's never really been because of anything#i just started because i was curious about why someone would do that. that's all#i dont think i've EVER had any of the mental distress i see people in when theyre in these spaces#in one journal entry i made this big deal about wanting to kill myself but *i didn't want to*. i never did.#like sorry old me but it is REALLY hard to believe i've ever been depressed depressed#i just want things to be better and they never are :/ this should be everything i wanted and its just ... not#i'm not really sure how to ....... oh tag limit ok hold on
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really hate that it's taken me two nights to write 2k words 😞 but I've nearly got the first draft of the first chapter done soooo 🤷♀️
#i write sometimes#it's kinda slow going. but it's going at least I guess.#I just miss being able to clack out like 1-2k in a single night like where'd that bitch go how do I get her back#I gotta go to bed I've already stayed up wayyyy to late 😞#I guess I did write roughly 1k a night tho idk it feels like I've written NOTHING tho it's so short :/#ughhhhhhhhhhhhhh I hate this#I always worry abt chapter length and then I think abt all the comments I've gotten on longer one shots like#'this was long maybe coulda been chapters' like UGGH OK WHERE'S THE LIMIT THO???#I like keeping chapters between like 2-3k though it feels like a good length. idk. bed time jfc
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trying to not be a know it all is soooo hard when you're around other know it alls. it's such a weird balance bc if someone smugly corrects you with wrong info and you tell them they're wrong, somehow YOU'RE the rude one, which doesn't make any sense to me!!! you started it!!
#i'm STILL mad about this interaction i had with a coworker#lmfao SO.#at our job. at a COFFEE SHOP.#he was like oh i wish we had a cafe au lait i think our customers would love it#and i was like. we do we just don't call it that we call it a misto. a cafe au lait is coffee with steamed milk.#it's just FRENCH lol#and he was like NO that's not right actually a cafe au lait is made with cold milk#and i just had to be like. ok.#because i'm not FIGHTING with you on the clock#but. you are wrong#lmfao he gets sooo mad when one of our coworkers calls him out for mansplaining but like. well.#once he explained to me in excruciating detail what a flat white is....#again. at my job at a coffee shop. that i've unfortunately worked in for over 5 years.#i have gotten so good at letting things go#but any time i go 'huh. i didn't know that. cool'.#PLEASE KNOW. i KNOW you are wrong. and i just do not want to fight about it.#although most things can be solved by a quick google... but break out google and you're NEVER beating the know it all allegations lol
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tell me why i'm considering opening the doc and writing fanfiction during my lunch break. ON MY PHONE
#talking tag;#totp tag;#i've been meaning to make a tag for the fic so. there#ok if anyone is curious (probably not but like. i like talking about these things) i split the fic in sections in my head#so every ''kimberly finds her father in blah blah'' is a section and that's how i keep track of them#so chapter 1 had sections 1-3 and chapter 2 had sections 4-5#and chapter 3 will have sections 6-7. it has to. for structure reasons#but section 6 is a very important one and she's at like. 8.5k words at the moment???? and i still haven't gotten to the last scene#OF THE SECTION. THEN THERE'S ANOTHER SECTION#which should hopefully be shorter (around 5k or less is my guess) because fewer things happen but. god#we're looking at a 15+k word chapter. if you're reading the fic hopefully you like long chapters cause!!! it'll be a long one!!!!!#also i am once again pointing out that if you're reading the fic and have absolutely anything to say about it PLEASE tell me#i love talking about this fic she's my child that i created. she's like a clay sculpture to me#i do mean to reply to ao3 comments but i'm shy 😭😭😭😭 but i reread them all a billion times and cry about them every time#i'm still thinking about the lengend that dropped that page long comment on chapter one. king (gn) if you see this i love you#when i reply to comments yours will be first. know that you have me and nat's infinite love forever and always.#truly i hope you like it and cand find peace in it. lord knows we all need it#well. anyways! i think i might edit the doc i'll see
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good morning! i just put a.khos on the f/o list!
#had to happen eventually hehe! I've fallen head over heels for my biggest enemy and i love him sooooo much!!#ash rambles 💚#i had a pretty eventful weekend#went out of town and on a shopping spree! twas very fun and i ate lots of yummy food and the such#i'm home now but so.. tired... cant bring myself to get out of bed just yet BAHAHAHA#i keep thinking about a.khos' arms around me keeping me close to him#i had a kinda creepy interaction with a man in public the other day and although i'm ok and safe#it was the first time that had happened to me and i'm still sorta shaken up#im ok!!! but i keep thinking about f/o comfort and the such just to help some more. i'm completely safe and doing so much better than I was#you see... theres this character... i don't love him. i think he's a horrible man. but he's so hot i start questioning things about myself#and my s/i for that source is a known flirt- so i wouldnt put it past them to have gotten it on a few times#but i've been thinking... what if theyre actually bitter exes? maybe that's why my d.mc s/i hates serious relationships so much..#but that aside. this character wears this heavy coat and i keep thinking abt using it as a weighted blanket!! it looks really really cozy#sir you're an asshole but... give me your coat!!!!! (grabby hands)#oh also! me being home means i got to see a.qua plushie!!! i missed her!#but yeah. that's what's up. so much goddamn a.khos brainrot.#he's stolen my heart#and don't tell anyone i said this but...#i love it. i love it so much. no better feeling than me being his and he being mine#also i've been thinking about my xb1 fankid a lot as of late.. but if i start rambling about Nalia we'll be here all day LMAO#but yeah! hope everyone is doing well! i'm doing okay too#ALSO AJDHWJEHW SO MUCH S.KYRIM ROT!! I LOVE R.UNE BY THE WAY AJDJAJS I#I HAVE BEEN DOING SO SO MUCH S/I WRITING FOR THEM#ALL OF THE THIEVES GUILD ARE MY BEST FRIENDS BTW#also did i mention i got to visit one of the largest bookstores in the world? goodness i love books soooo much!!!!!!!!#but also... reading next to a.khos.. enjoying that comfortable silence..#(swoons) what a man
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i don't like my haircut but everyone (and i mean everyone) loves my haircut ??? am i crazy
#i've never gotten so many compliments on a haircut#today our waiter said they were jealous because they were too scared to rock a 'cool punk haircut'#a goth teenager working at taco bell blurted out 'woah you look so cool' as soon as the opened the drive thru window#old lesbians love it#why do i hate it !!#i love the way it feels but i don't like looking at it#anyway transition is weeeeeird i'm feeling so weird rn#i'm so happy abt all the changes but its making me unhappy with my appearance overall because i'm not butch enough or man enough yet#even tho i KNOW that's bullshit#it's a feeling that has been very hard to shake#trying to think what is at the core of the feeling#maybe the ever present fear of rejection#but the result is that i'm rejecting myself#or perhaps it all stems back to my psychosexual obsession with a girl in my pre-school class#(just like every think that is wrong with me!!!)#joking#or am i ?#ok bye <3
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posting stuff online because i truly just love sharing my silly creations with anyone who may also love them vs. wanting to deactivate and move to a forest every time i'm met with positive feedback (i am terrified of people and of being recognized/acknowledged)
#THUS IS NOT A GOOD MENTALITY I KNOOOOOWWW I KNOW DBSJDBSJH im just a non functioning little guy ok#i've gotten out of the 'worried about numbers' phase early but now it's been this fdhsjhsjghs the content machine is unforgiving#there's so many layers to this im TRYING to like slowly untangle all of it but. ugh :(#sometimes i think maybe i just need to stop doin merch and art altogether and touch grass or whatever but...#i dont want it to be my irrational fears that force me to stop doing stuff i like. it's not like there's any other problems#really -- otherwise i like doing what i do!! i don't even really care if ppl hate me and my shit BUT --#i think i care too much about not doing good enough for the people who DO like my little sillies 😭😭 and i think that's my main issue#maybe also explains why it's so hard for me to like.. talk/put my PERSONALITY out there? im scared that ppl who enjoy my stuff will hate ME#implying i have much of a personality anymore i think whatever was there kinda melted away these past few years djshkshk#SORRY FOR THE VENT POST sorry if u actually read all these tags oh my gosh#i'm just a weird guy aaaaaa i'm silly aaaaaaaaaaaa#the void screaming
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forgot i love sci-fi a normal amount
#like look ok. i always think like: man i don't like stuff with dense specific lore. i'm a themes and concepts guy over everything#and for some reason i'm sat here thinking sci-fi is all dense worldbuilding all the time#but whenever i get back into smth sci-fi i'm like. Oh. I ACTUALLY love this forever and ever? and ever?#and i have done this cycle multiple times#look i enjoy both star trek and star wars pretty shallowly but both were important to me growing up#and like i think sci-fi is such a perfect vessel for xenobiology concepts and relevant social commentary#while also just having one of the Coolest aesthetics#i love spec bio and i love applying current world issues to far-flung but still grounded situations#and i love robots and androids and ai and mutants and aliens and cyborgs#i love space#sci-fi! man!#this is cause i watched the first episode of starstruck and i'm pretty sure from the teaser that the captain just got brainjacked#by a parasite#and i think it would be such a cool character turn if zac started playing as said parasite instead#especially as we just came out of skipper like yelling at and being so mean to his whole crew and saying he was gonna fire them#i think it would be sick to do a 'they like the parasite better' thing#though i've gotten a kick out of skipper so far especially just how fuckinh done he is
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#ok look#i get not wanting to support certain transphobic authors of children's fantasy series#but can ppl actually cool it with the ''only weirdos are in the same fandom their whole lives''/''only weirdos read kids books'' thing?#you don't have to like children's media or get anything out of it#you can breezily hop from fandom to fandom as the wind carries you#or even not be into fandom at all!#but a lot of people like having a long-term fandom community!#and i think that's a fine and normal and ok thing to want even if it's not for everyone#like literally i'm jewish and we read the same book every year in weekly installments where we analyze the text#and discuss different interpretations#not that hp and the bible can generally be compared#but i just wish that when ppl took shots at hp#they didn't keep attacking the idea of fandom in general#or attacking ppl for liking things that aren't ''for their demo''#when interpretation and extrapolation of a text can build such beautiful communities#like it's been years since i've gotten out of hp fandom and i'm still looking for a fandom space so rich in ideas#DDDDDXXXXXX#<3 again i get that that's not the type of engagement for everyone; i don't tend to be drawn to childrens/YA that much tbh#but imo we should focus on the real enemy: marginalization in fandom spaces#& probably just stop giving that woman so much attention
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i come up with ideas based on the most random things because wdym i just rambled on about fucking fingers and decided,,,, heh,,,,, yeah. this is a good idea. well i mean i do think it IS a good idea but also like in hindsight and out of context i do think its totally fucking stupid. angel92 ahh post 💀💀💀
anyways i was thinking about mtt and fingers and which ones they would lose as a result of being with eachother but then that also means that i'd have to give specific meanings to the fingers (ughhhh,,,,,) ok lets see. pointer finger would represent precision and clear vision because you literally use it to specifically gesture to things. middle finger is like ughh vulgarity and hatred because its the middle finger. the ring finger (heh! i already spoke about this one because of the myth that its connected to the heart and also holds wedding rings) represents love and the pinkie represent promise (PINKIE PROMISE!) and the thumb represents basic functioning and interpretations (because the thumb helps us literally hold things and also thumbs up and down shows your view on things)
i think if i just tack this idea onto the other post about ring fingers then it would be kinda unrealted + plus too long SO ITS GOING HERE. all the mtt are missing ring fingers because i said so. dust is missing an index finger because if the trio break up he's the only one that wouldnt have anywhere/one to go. also he'd struggle to smoke and i think that horror would always complain about him smoking so it'd be like horror's still kinda there warding him off from smoking even though he's not there anymore. horror would lose his middle finger because he'd probably be the most agressive against kist in mttpoly and now without them there he's kinda chilled out. but also the agression and spark isnt there and now he's stuck in plain old boring regular horrortale again which isnt all that fun,,,, even if dust an killer sucked fighting was a way to pass time. but horror would never admit that. and i think killer could lose a thumb (ill be fr im just running out of fingers to use here. next thing yk i'll start talking about TOES) and then he'd struggle to hold knives normally now. he literally can't hurt others the way he hurt horror and dust (but also that could also mean that killer just has to come up with more creative ways to main. or also his reduced actions could result in him causing less trouble and therefore having less threats. depends on if killer wants to be a bit more knife happy or just chil,,,,,, you KNOW i gotta go with the knife happy idea mtt NEVER get a break and if they do i immediately forget about it)
dude imagine them with all these missing fingers 💀💀💀 that shit would lookd SO weird
#triglycercule's on a BIT of a roll coming up with ideas#i dont particularly know why tbh i guess i've just gotten over this slump of not having ideas#i already have 3 other decent ISH ideas in my notes app i should probably figure thst out#and then of course i have my ever growing pile of drafts on here#i cleared some of them out so now i have 40~ but thats still a SHITTON of ideas ive yet to post#on the other post ive yet to post i got too fucking into the idea#like WDYM the mtt would all just COINCIDENTALLY lose their ring fingers#its a cool idea tho..... just seems a bit unfeasible to me but whatever everything is impossible snyways#i have summer homework due on tuesday ive yet to do i should REALLY probably do that#and a test im 90% sure im gonna BOMB on monday. its the EIGHTH DAY OF FUCKING SCHOOL AND A TEST#i havent even gotten used to doing HOMEWORK again and my bitchass math techer is giving us a TEST.... smh old people#anyways mtt have 2 hands all so they can beat eachother up#polyamory solves everything but the solution isn't all much healthier than if the trio just fucking stayed ALONE 😭😭😭😭#ugh i need them all to kill eachother SERIOUSLY and then they feel bad but also satisfied about it but also bad but also#what would that feeling be like as a word. what word would that be (asks killer because he doesnt know shit about emotions$#they are NOT doomed by the narrative but ALSO NOT soulmates in every universe (debatable in my head)#but instead they were never meant to be together and because they were never meant to be together they simply dont work#but just having that constant even if it hurts and you hate it and everything it stands for when you've had nothing that understands you#is just kinda like. damn. okay i might stay like this for a while#they are not doomed by the narrative they are doomed by each other#gawwwdddd i love mtt so much..... mttpoly..... they were mesnt to be#but didn't you just say they weren't??? ok MAYBE but its because theyre all such terrible fits thst they were meant to be#they all match eachother's freaks in a way that no other utmv character can. mtt gets mtt#the mtt have so many parallels i really should make a graph or something#they all have scary faces!!!! kinda. killer with the chara scary face#horror with his black drooly pissed face and i guess dust's shadowed out face could be scary#but i think that face would be scarier if there were realistic human eyes peeking out but wtvr#anyways all have scary face what else. theres so much more its not even funny they seriously are meant to be together#if always together in fandom art and writing and other depictions then why not poly??? why not TOGETHER together??? why mtt seperate???#tricule rant
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bro
#i hate job apps lmao kinda in the trenches rn#i'm so idk so mixed feelings rn 💀#i think my self esteem when it comes to job apps is like fucking shot from career fair and job rejections and everything#my last interview was offered like a couple days before the interview and i just winged it and didn't rly prepare#and then after the interview realized i actually kinda like the company and would kinda wnat the job more than my lack of prep suggests LOL#but i applied for smth over the summer and they said they'd actually be interested in giving me an offer#but i committed to staying on campus for this yr (which i could've done stuff to get out of but i have dumb reasons for it ig)#but they just reached out and said they'd STILL be interested in offering me a job for summer 2025 start date#and it makes me fucking sad that i feel so weird abt it LMFAO i am happy abt it#but like literally this week has been so many rejections back to back bc i've been applying to things at my (old) college's career fair#and so many of them have already just immediately rejected me 💀#so a big part of me rn is like why the fuck would this company even still want me ya know#😀😀😀😀 i thnk i'll cry abt this at some point idk when tho 😀😀😀😀#also my mom keeps nagging me to apply for masters which i haven't actually looked into at all yet#i think esp bc she called me last night and was like no one's gonna give you a chance bc you only have bachelors#so you can't compete when theres masters and phd applicants too#which is true ig like i have just gotten flat out rejected without any interview or anything so many times#sooooo all of that adding up to me being like well i somehow tricked this company into still wanting me right#even tho i am literally doing nothing this yr i'm staying on campus bc i like it here#and i have a remote part time job and i'm figuring out what i want to do#jfc idk lmfao i'm also nervous abt telling my mom bc i feel like she just#ughhhgiuhdgfiwtglkdghfajs she can be very critical and judgmental ;-;#and i fele like she's been like that kind of a lot w job/masters conversations and i don't rly like talking to her abt it lmfao#when she called me yesterday she started nagging me abt job apps and not being picky abt stuff and i'm like#you have told me this 746598347 times i rly don't need to hear it again#i do appreciate and love my mom but i just rly don't like this lmfao#i think she'd be ok w it / happy i guess she did tell me to apply for this company at one point a while ago#i wanna scream lmfao#bro i wish tumblr would tell me when im RUNNING OUT OF TAGS rip some of this rambling i don't even remember what i said LOL#jeanne talks
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