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lacy, oh lacy
actor!eren x f!reader
**part of my method acting series
content: oopsie. mentions of blood/injury. I think drinking is like briefly mentioned at one point.
an: ok. ok. the song line up in this one is so random i swear.
songs mentioned: peace by taylor swift, city of stars by ryan gosling and emma stone, promiscuous by nelly, lacy by olivia rodrigo
previous part linked here
--
You return home and stay there for an entire month, despite protests from Danny and Sareen. But anytime they try to push back, you remind them.
Your older brother split his head open because someone threw a brick through his window. Because of a situation they got you involved in.
Granted, they’re not fully to blame since you did agree to it, but Levi and Hange vehemently disagree. The two of them were very passionate about the fact that managers have a responsibility to protect their artists and the fact that Danny and Sareen even asked you to do something like this has them fuming. And by them, you mean Levi. He yelled at them on the phone after the pictures dropped.
Regardless, your contract with them won’t be over until the end of the year. The only way you can terminate is if you break the deal with the record company, but then you have to promise them majority royalties that you make with any other songs you release until the two years are up.
Which isn’t bad. You could just not write music for two years. But there’s some sense of loyalty, a need to maintain face so someone else does sign with you later on, you’ve proved you’ll be loyal. And that your records won’t suffer because of internal politics.
But for now, all you’re focused on is Colt and Falco.
Falco, who is quite literally a human cat (in the cute way, not the Catoru Gojo way), is currently nestled up in your lap and fast asleep. After two hours of playing Rocket League, which you actually suck at, and then another two hours of arguing about how stupid the game is (cars playing soccer???), he finally passed out.
Colt knocks, the scar along his hairline bright red, as he hands you a bowl of cereal and settles onto your bed with his laptop. Which he’s been doing often lately - lingering around in your room, never leaving you alone. Hovering.
He’s applying for summer internships, because apparently that’s a thing that normal people and not celebrities do. Not that you would know anything about that.
“Thanks Colt.”
He gives you a hum as he types away on his laptop, his jaw clenched in concentration. But all you can do is stare at that bright red line near his golden blonde hair and how angry it looks. There’s four sets of stitches in place, the area around the entire mark so pink and swollen. And he’s blinking too hard, eyes squinting at the laptop even though the brightness is all the way down. Meaning, his head is still hurting. You make a mental note to call the doctor again tomorrow.
“Y/N.”
“What?”
“Quit staring.”
“I’m not staring. And stop being so loud, Coco is sleeping.” you whisper.
“Were you born yesterday? He’d sleep through the apocalypse if he had to.”
You bring your hand down to Falco’s hair, soft under your touch, as he snores into your legs.
“Not lately. Y-yesterday, he came into my room crying in the middle of the night. Said he had a nightmare of glass shattering but it was just someone parking across the street.”
Colt looks over, his glasses resting against his nose, and gives Falco a worried look.
“He just- he was there when it happened, that’s all.” Colt murmurs, voice all quiet.
“You never told me what did happen.”
Colt closes the screen of his laptop and sets the computer in between you, as he readjusts on his side. His hand is now in Falco’s hair, making a mess of his already matted hair.
“I-I was sitting in your room.”
“Huh? Why?”
“I do that when I miss you. Just sit in here, with Chelsea and all these god awful posters you have.”
You smile, reaching forward to squeeze his hand which he rolls his eyes at.
“You’re cute. You miss me?”
“Shut the fuck up.”
“Okay, Jesus.”
“Falco came to sit with me too. Also, he totally ate chocolate on your bed and spilled some on the carpet.”
“Remind me to kill him when he wakes up. Is that what’s under that god awful rug you guys put in here?” you respond, grating your teeth.
He ignores the comment all together and keeps going.
“I kept getting a lot of texts from my classmates and stuff like that, like a few hours after. About the pictures of you and the rumors and all that. And I called you and Eren picked up and he told me about how you came to him, all bloody and cold. He told me that you were finally sleeping so he didn’t wake you. Said to call him back if I needed something.”
Sweet, sweet Eren.
“And then I heard it. This rustling, by the side doors. Now, I know that Sandra putting the trash cans back is really loud from your room, but it was Friday. Trash day is on Tuesday. So I peeked my head out the window to see what the noise was and that’s when they threw the brick. It went through the glass and hit me.”
You clench his hand, which he shakes his head at. He’s rubbing small circles into your skin as he keeps going, his voice so hollow it bothers you.
“I fell over. Started bleeding onto your carpet and Falco finally noticed. And, and he was holding my head trying to stop the bleeding. He figured it was the right thing to do after how much Grey’s Anatomy you’ve forced him to watch. Mom and Dad came in and I told them to call Eren and not you, because you were probably still asleep. Eren sent us a security detail super fast, he said it’s the one he’s been using since he was a kid so we can trust them. They got here in like twenty minutes and did the stitches on me.”
You look at him and he wraps his arms around you, Falco meshed in between the two of you. And you stay that way for a while, in each other's embrace, as the guilt sits with you. And when Colt falls asleep too, you reach for your notebook and scribble the lyrics down.
As long as danger is near And it's just around the corner, darling 'Cause it lives in me No, I could never give you peace
You slide out of their embrace, leaving the two of them tangled on your bed as you hike your knees to your chest and sit on the floor to write properly. And when you lift the rug on the ground out of curiosity and piece it all together - that they’re covering up the dark, brown mark of Colt’s blood on your carpet, you keep writing.
I’ll give you my sunshine, give you my best But the rain is always going to come if you’re standing with me Would it be enough if I could never give you peace?
Your phone buzzes three times and you reach for it, sliding it open to read the notification.
eren: attachment, two images
eren: saw you earlier today. ur face card is insane.
You open up the picture, one of him and Lana in Los Angeles with a billboard of you in the back. You had seen them on Twitter, Spotify putting up big pictures of the Ribbons album cover, with Multi-Platinum in shiny letters right next to it.
The first picture is of Eren and Lana blowing kisses towards the billboard of you and the second is Eren choking Lana a few seconds after. The photos are live, so you hold down and watch Eren and Lana move in the picture, Eren’s laugh coming through.
you: please don’t choke my wife. she’s too hot to die young.
eren: i hate you guys. i really do.
you: are you jealous?
eren: you were mine first >:P
eren: how’s falco? he hasn’t responded to my text since yday :/
you: please stop texting my thirteen year old brother. you’re such a loser.
you: idk. he had a nightmare last night about what happened. i don’t think he’s taking it too well.
eren: it’s hard. he’s still so little. how’s colt?
you: his cut looks like it hurts and he keeps squinting at his computer still. i feel like he’s trying to put on a brave face for me or something.
eren: he’s older than you and he’s always taken care of you. he’s going to do that still, and you should just let him. how are you?
You pause.
You’re sick to your stomach. Because all you’ve been able to do is read what people say about you online. And what gets you, is that everyone thinks you’re so fake. And you think so hard, read so much into what they’re saying, that you almost start thinking it’s true.
Is the “I’m a small town Canadian girl an act?” You haven’t lived here in years. And you can’t say you’re not famous anymore - because you’ve literally broken records before, multiple times over. And you’re not really a fraud anymore, despite the fact that you still feel like one. You fake relationships, your friends don’t like you, and…and…..
You’re fake. Your mistakes are on display and some people think you deserve to die for it.
eren: where’d you go?
you: sorry. im trying my best to hold on. i was just writing a song.
eren: LEMME SEE.
you: no.
eren: LET ME SEE.
You take a picture of the lyrics, messily scribbled in your book and send him a picture. And then nearly a minute later, Eren’s name is flashing across your screen and he’s calling you. You quickly walk into Falco’s room and take a seat by his little balcony, sliding the call open.
“Hi Eren.”
“Oh, Y/N. Sweetheart.”
And at the sound of him calling you that, of him calling you sweetheart still, has tears burning down your face and tiny sobs leaving your mouth.
“If the rain is always going to come if I’m standing with you, I’ll just hold an umbrella.”
“Eren.”
“That’s how they feel about it too. Both of them. I know it’s different when it’s me because I understand, because we’re used to this, but they love you. You are enough for them, even if you come with this thing behind you. That you can’t control, mind you.”
“I know that, Eren. But I want them to have that, I want their lives to be peaceful and I want Falco to sleep through the night without waking up. I don’t want to give Colt to get hurt because of me-”
“Every time I call them, all I hear is them worried about you. That you’re going to pull away from them, because you’re scared of hurting them. And-and I told you how much it sucks when you’re on the other side of that. Granted, Zeke’s a sick fuck who did it to mess with me but…please don’t do that to Colt or Falco. You’re going to actually hurt them if you do that. Pull away.”
You pause, taking in Eren’s words. Eren and Zeke. Zeke got canceled and stopped talking to Eren all together. Insulted him, made fun of him, and didn’t say anything at all. And, and it hurt him so bad that when Eren told you, that he was crying.
No. You’re not doing that to Falco or to Colt. God forbid they feel like they’re unlovable because you can’t let them in.
“You-you’re right, Eren. Thanks. That-that actually helps.”
“Yeah?”
“Yeah. I-I didn’t even realize. I forgot that this has happened to you. Are-are you okay? I know this type of thing can be triggering, I should have asked before.” you respond.
He’s quiet.
“Eren?”
“Yeah. It-it wasn’t easy.”
“I’m sorry. I should’ve-”
“No, no. I don’t mean like, it wasn’t easy and you shouldn’t have come to me. It was more…eye-opening I guess. It hadn’t happened in so long that I forgot about it. It was a harsh reality check when it was you of all people knocking on my door. I hate that I can’t protect you from these types of things.”
“I’m sorry, Eren. You-”
You pause. What do you say? What do you say to him when this is all he’s known? All he’ll ever know? And when you know all too well that there really is nothing he can do?
“You don’t have to say anything, Y/N. Knowing you’re here with me is enough.”
Fucking mind reader. You hate it when he does this.
“God. Quit reading my mind.”
“Can’t help it. I know you like the back of my hand. And I am saying that in earnest. This shit sucks, I’ve dealt with it forever. But you make things easy. Your presence is enough comfort, okay?”
There’s a beat on the phone call. He doesn’t speak and you don’t either. And you can feel your cheeks burning.
“Eren?”
“Hm?”
“Since when do you call my brothers?” you ask, sniffling.
“Ah, you know. Since it happened. But in all fairness, Falco calls me first most of the time.”
“How many times have you talked to him?”
“Like every day or every other day at least. Kid is so ridiculous.”
“Eren. You don’t even call me that much.”
“Do you want me to?”
“No, it’s not the same if I have to ask you to do it. And plus, your new best friend is probably going to get all mad at me.” you tease, trying not to laugh.
“Oh, don’t be like that, sweetheart. I’ll call you more, yeah?”
“Yeah.”
“Don’t say yeah like that.”
“Like what?”
“God, Y/N. Quit flirting with me or I’m going to fall in love with you.”
Your heart does a somersault, a cartwheel, a back handspring, and everything in between. Eren throws blankets over your barbed wire and shamelessly flirts with you after like it’s nothing.
--
The song comes out in the middle of your preliminary press tour for Ten Things I Hate About You and instantly becomes a hot topic the interviewees focus on. You’ve been stuck working all day. You can’t even comment on whether or not the song is about you if you wanted to.
Historia released her latest single, for her new and upcoming album, called Lacy. And everyone thinks the song is about you, that it’s a response to dorothea. And when you get home from the warm lights nearly cooking you on the stage, you immediately run and pull up the video on your computer, Yuuta and Rika taking residence in your room while you do.
The music video is simple, a black and white video of Historia and Eren in a recording studio, singing the song. Eren’s nimble hands are plucking the strings of the guitar and Historia’s sweet, soft voice is carrying the vocals.
Ooh, I care, I care, I care Like perfume that you wear, I linger all the time Watching, hidden in plain sight And ooh, I try, I try, I try But it takes over my life, I see you everywhere The sweetest torture one could bear
You keep listening, focusing intently on how anyone could even connect the song to you. Granted, from what you’re gathering, the song is about someone Historia knows that she idolizes, focuses on so much that it makes her feel bad about herself. Like an obsession.
You are put into constant competition with each other, down to the time your records come out. People make it a point to comment on who would become a triple threat first - her or you - or pigeon hole the tiniest details into some big feud between the two of you. The only time your song leaves the #1 spot on the top of the charts is when Historia releases a new one, the only time her movie falls in popularity is because yours comes out.
But that doesn’t mean it’s about you.
Ooh, I care, I care, I care Like ribbons in your hair, my stomach's all in knots You got the one thing that I want Ooh, I try, I try, I try Try to rationalize, people are people But it's like you're made of angel dust
You freeze. That’s where the connection comes in. The ribbons in your hair. Not only is your record literally called Ribbons, but the entire tour, press, even the cover of the album is you with varying colors of ribbons in your hair.
If that’s true, then…Historia stopped talking to you because of it? Because people pit her against you one too many times and it makes her feel bad about herself? You reach for your phone.
you: eren.
eren: y/n. what can i do you for?
you: is lacy about me?
eren: just saw ur lip sync battle with sukuna. i’m inconsolable.
He’s changing the subject. Though, you were waiting for him to bring that up. Your final stop on the press tour before finishing and returning to filming was doing the infamous lip sync battle - with you and Sukuna against Yuuta and Rika. And in true Yuuta and Rika fashion, they did a super lovey dovey rendition of City of Stars, from La La Land. Which only made it funnier that you and Sukuna just sang Promiscuous and made it rain dollar bills on each other.
you: i’m sure your heart is very broken. but quit changing the subject.
eren: it is. i’ll never love again.
you: eren. answer the question. you know how much this entire hisu thing has bothered me.
eren: i’m sorry, sweetheart. you know i can’t talk about things historia told me in confidence, as much as i want to.
you: eren. are you seriously telling me that historia stopped being my friend because OTHER PEOPLE were comparing us? that’s so stupid.
eren: don’t pigeon hole the lyrics. you don’t even know if it’s about you. and even if it is, give historia some slack. this entire thing we do is complicated. and she’s always felt things so deeply.
you: you’re a traitor. you’re supposed to be on my side.
eren: sometimes being the devil's advocate is being on your side.
you: don’t quote me back to me. being annoying isn’t a good look on you.
You throw your phone back and replay the song. Four times, each time doing exactly what Eren told you not to do and pigeonholing the lyrics. But you keep going over it in your head. That if it really is about you, then the way you are, the success you have is so obsessive for Historia that it made her start hating herself. That she feels like she can’t compare, so much so, that she’d avoid you all together.
It stings. You were girls together.
The last time you talked to Historia was months ago, when you were still taking your month off and staying with Colt and Falco. And even that was an exception to her normal radio silence and the miles she put between you two.
The call came in the middle of the night, right after you made sure Falco and Colt were both asleep. What you were expecting was Eren - who was too overprotective and kept calling to check if you were okay. But instead, Historia’s name and the picture of the two of you - fast asleep on the couch on the Attack on Titan set - was flashing across the screen.
“Y/N?”
“Hisu? Is it really you.”
She awkwardly laughs.
“Yeah. Hi. I was just calling to check up on you. I would take time off to come see you like everyone else but I’m stuck on set.”
“No problem. I-I’m staying home anyways. With Coco and Colt.”
“That’s nice. I’m glad, you-you never were one to take a break.”
You pause.
“So. Um-”
“You’re okay, right? I-I saw the pictures. The entire thing is really shitty and I’m sorry it happened to you.”
“Yeah. Yeah, I’m okay. How are you?”
“I’m about to go on release my album in a few months. Then go on tour. ”
“Yeah, I’ve been watching all the press. You’re amazing, I-I’m really excited to listen, yeah? I’ve always been your number one fan.”
There’s a beat. She doesn’t respond right away and the silence sticks in your mind, even if it’s only for a few seconds.
“Thanks, Y/N. You’ve always been really sweet.”
“You too, yeah?”
“Listen. I have to go. But take it easy, yeah?”
“Okay. Bye Hisu.”
It’s static.
You reach for your phone and pull up the chat between you and her and text.
you: just listened to lacy, hisu. another hit, once again.
And after you can’t help but think about it. Are these the compliments that hit like bullets on skin? She never responds. You take that as a yes.
--
You stare at the screen, eyes focused on the texts. That have been bothering you for a few days. Five texts, all left unanswered by Eren.
Your novelty is wearing off. Eren’s done talking to you.
You’re making it up. You’re making it up and it’s only because you’re so used to his quick witted responses that it’s bothering you. That he hasn’t responded yet. You read them over again, double, triple checking what you said.
you: saw this ugly toad ceramic at the store. reminded me of you.
you: i’ll buy it for you.
you: i think jean is going to propose to mika. and i know they’ve literally been together since we were fifteen but we are ONLY TWENTY TWO.
you: it’s been a while since we’ve seen each other!!!
you: armin and i were thinking of coming down for your birthday! meet all ur lil set friends and see connie again and stuff :’)
It sits with you in a weird way. Because you know that he responded to Armin an hour ago, about his birthday. And said that it was best that you both didn’t come just because of how busy it was, that he’d probably only get to spend an hour with you guys.
Armin is insistent on going anyway. And you just miss Eren. Sukuna pads into the room and finds you like this, with your phone flat on your bed and the way you’re leaning over the covers and staring intently at it.
“Just climb in, why don’t you?” he mutters, falling flat on your bed.
“Hello to you too. Why are you in my trailer?”
“Bored. Lonely. Horny. Take your pick.”
You roll your eyes and side shuffle to make room for him, his stupid musky smell enveloping the air. What you were expecting to be an unpleasant co-star was anything but, because you and Sukuna have slowly been sweeping hearts.
From the way you guys argue during press, how Sukuna shamelessly flirts with you, to your shared need to fight with each other - you’re quickly ramping up the popularity around the rom-com you aren’t even done filming.
“So. What the fuck are you staring at?”
“Nothing.”
“Talk.” he says sternly, lifting his hand to knock on your head.
Absolute caveman.
“Can I ask you a weird question?”
“Sure.”
“How are you so blunt?”
He turns over, a look of confusion spread on his face. You follow suit and turn over too, eyes focused on the tattoos that litter his skin. All the way around his neck and his arms and on instinct, you nervously reach for your own.
“Are you tired of being a pushover, Y/N?”
“What? I’m not a pushover, I’m just-”
You stop. Maybe not the word you would use, people pleaser seems more like the explanation for it. Maybe if you cared less about Eren, about what he thought of you, it would be easier. Maybe if you wanted him less it would be easier to be his friend.
“I’m going to tell you something and you can’t repeat it to anyone, doll. I’m trusting you here, okay?”
“Okay. I promise I won’t tell anyone.”
“I learned quickly that you can’t let anyone have a pull on you. Because when you do, you’ll do anything. Believe anything. And it’ll be your downfall if you let it.”
You take in his words. And he doesn’t talk for a while, eyes focused on the brown ceiling of your trailer.
“I went a long time without doing what I felt was right. What people were pulling me to do this and that, what I had to do. And when I reached a certain point, I didn’t even know who I was anymore. Hundreds, thousands of people loved me and I didn’t even know who I was looking at in the mirror.” he says.
“Well, I hardly doubt it was thousands, Sukuna. You’re quite irritating.”
He brings his hand down on your face, laughing. His face is uncharacteristically soft and he resembles Yuuji too much. Granted, they are fucking twins but the expression - it’s one you’ve only seen reflected on his face and never Sukuna’s.
“You’re tolerable when you’re like this, Y/N. You’re always such a pain in the fucking ass.”
“You’re normal like this. It’s nice. You should do it more often.”
There’s a beat. And he’s thinking.
“Being blunt is the only way I’m sure. That I’m being myself, because that’s what’s coming to mind. And in a place where almost everyone is lying, trying to pit everyone else against each other and bring them down for entertainment, honesty is the only way I make it out.”
You nod, sinking in his words. Thinking back to Sukuna, when you met him. When he was on again and off again with Hyla, how he said that he would just get pulled so deeply into things that he didn’t even realize what was going on till he was out of it. That it was blinding.
“So what was bothering you?”
“Ah. You know, the whole Historia thing.”
He laughs.
“Lacy, oh lacy. Skin like puff pastry.”
You snort.
“I can’t even tell if that’s a compliment or not. Aren’t puff pastries really dry and crumbly?”
“I think she meant to say pasty. Like a ghost.” he responds.
“I don’t know, Sukuna. I guess I feel bad. That we’re always in competition and that it seems like my mere existence just makes it hard for her.”
“Y/N.”
“Hm?”
“You know what Historia does when she puts you on a pedestal?”
“What?”
“Gives herself no room to stand next to you. And leaves you up there alone.” he says, the tone in his voice definitive.
You pause.
“When the fuck did you become so wise?”
“Beauty and brains, Y/N. There isn’t a thing I can’t do.” he responds, giving you a stupid smirk.
--
The pictures drop on Twitter three weeks later, on your last week of filming, and give you a bittersweet reaction. The first one, when you see it, makes your heart drop. Maybe even break a little.
Eren and Hyla, all curled up on a yacht kissing each other. Eren looks great, phenomenal even, and people make no point to keep that information to themselves. He’s getting more and more fit as time goes on, the stupid sunglasses he’s wearing, and his hair long again - people are going feral for Eren Jaeger. And Hyla is Hyla - gorgeous, brilliant, and beautiful.
Granted, this entire feeling is on you for making the assumption. That Eren taking care of you after the Ricky thing, that you guys constantly text again like you used to, is any inclination that he likes you. Especially when he started slipping away.
It’s simple. Eren’s your best friend. Nothing more, nothing less. You dropped the ball and let him go and now he’s someone else’s.
You’re fish together because you’re friends, because you get each other. And that alone is a testament to your relationship. That it can’t be replaced.
But it doesn’t make it sting any less. Especially when he gives you no warning beforehand.
But in a nice, karmic way, the second picture makes it all better. It’s Eren throwing up over the side of the boat. Right after kissing Hyla.
Eren and his sensitive stomach save the day. He’s trending for both how great he looks and for how ridiculous it is that he literally vomited after kissing his girlfriend.
“Sukuna. Come here.”
“Hm? What do you want?”
“Let’s send him a picture.” you say, pointing at the pictures.
Sukuna, in true Sukuna fashion, has printed out both pictures and framed them for the trailer.
For Sukuna, the entire ordeal is priceless. Because Eren and Hyla being together is funny, but Hyla being so atrocious that Eren throws up after they kiss is even funnier. He’s already tweeted so much about it that everyone’s dying over Sukuna and how petty he is. Truly, the only person who could get away with this.
You debate addressing the elephant in the room with Eren. Granted, calling a model like Hyla an elephant is almost ironic but, you digress.
If it was a big deal, he would give you a warning. So you shouldn't. But maybe you should tell him you don't care and that it's okay that he's with her.
What are you saying? He doesn't need your permission. Ignore, ignore, ignore.
You put the frame against the mirror, making sure Eren can see you and Sukuna laughing in the reflection as you take a picture of the frame. And the fact that Sukuna’s not wearing a shirt, that he’s leaning all over you, should trigger some type of reaction. Or you at least hope it will.
“Give him hell, doll. Stupid prick.” he says, shuffling away back to the other side of his trailer.
You give him a smile as you slide open your phone, sending him the picture. And then you follow and plop onto Sukuna’s bed, which has him nearly trying to cut off your circulation by smothering a pillow in your face.
A gentleman.
you: eren jaeger, the man that you are
eren: FUCKING STOP. JEAN IS ALREADY DOGGING ME ON TWITTER.
you: an instant classic. you are never living this down, my friend.
you: the fact that connie has said nothing yet is almost concerning. this has him written all over it.
eren: tell sukuna i will kill him. he’s got his dirty paws ALL OVER YOU TOO
you: possessive much?
eren: i am a simple man. and you two together has been a sore spot for me since i was sixteen. there’s only so much i can stomach.
you: protect your peace, king. this movie is not going to be easy for you.
eren: WHY?????
you: has a lot of smooching. and you KNOW sukuna gets carried away.
eren: blocked. I hate you.
eren: never talk to me again. i refuse to come to the premiere.
you: hehe.
eren: do NOT hehe me. im going to cry myself to sleep. do you relish in my pain?
you: a little bit. sweet dreams!!!
eren disliked a message.
Sukuna leans over and reads the messages as Yuuji and Rika walk in, with Yuuta and Annie in tow. You give them all a smile as they fall onto the bed with you two, stuck in their own conversations. Annie and Rika are talking about Rika’s birthday that’s coming up and Yuuji’s too busy trying to swipe Annie’s phone, for god knows what reason.
“This is insane. He’s all but fucking another girl on a yacht but talking to you like this? After ignoring you too?” Sukuna mutters, glaring at you.
“It’s not like that. We-we’re just friends. And it’s funny to joke about it.”
“You’re just friends. Yeah, and I’m the Thirteenth Disciple of Jesus, Y/N.” he responds, bitingly sarcastic.
“You and Judas would get along.” you respond.
“You’re being stupid. I’m not buying you ice cream when you come to me crying when he stops texting you.”
“You would. Begrudgingly, probably while hurling a bunch of insults at me, but you would.”
He reaches forward and flicks your forehead. A telltale sign that even he knows he would, because he isn’t rejecting the notion. Yuuta scoots over and flicks Sukuna’s hand off, giving you a smile.
“What are you arguing about over here?” he asks, giving you a warm smile.
“Eren.”
“Oh, I just saw the pictures. Poor guy.” Yuuta says, an awkward hand rubbing the back of his neck.
“Yuuta. Got a question.” you say, propping up on your elbows.
You explain the whole situation to Yuuta. That you and Eren dated. And then you didn’t. And then he saved you from Ricky, that you guys were texting again, but he’s dating Hyla now, full on and out in the open. And then let him read the texts and ask him.
“Now tell me, Yuu. Who is in the wrong?”
“Sukuna.”
You give Yuuta a glimmering smile as Sukuna rolls his eyes, reaching forward to headbutt both of you down into the mattress. You both protest and smack him off, giving him the finger.
“The only person on this Earth who is more goo goo ga ga and down horrendous than you is Yuuta. You picked a biased person to intervene.” he says, seething.
“Did not. I don’t even know what you’re talking about.”
“Oh, quit playing dumb, doll. Yuuta and Maki are worse than you and Eren. Break up, make up, argue loud as fuck in the middle of the street, just to be kissing in the park the next day.”
“You just don’t get it. You can’t relate to the situation, Sukuna. Sometimes you just can’t stay away. Have you ever been in love?”
“Every time I look at you, doll.”
“Ugh. You’re disgusting.”
“You love it.”
The bell rings outside the trailer, signaling the call time for set, and Sukuna makes it a point to give you his warning.
“You’re treading on thin ice, doll. And when you fall, it’s going to be no one’s fault but your own.”
“For someone who claims he’s not a disciple of Jesus, you sure like to act self righteous as fuck all the time.” you respond, pushing him into the food cart near the directors chair.
Sukuna rolls his eyes as he drags you by the arm to your chairs, propped up, as you watch Yuuta and Rika take their marks, with Annie and Yuuji in the back. Sukuna’s glaring at you, bloody murder, unable to drop what he’s talking about.
“Look. Even for normal people, it’s never a good sign to be friends with your exes. And I bet he’s already being suspicious as fuck, despite the fact that he puts this whole goofy best friend persona on and flirts with you once in a while.”
“He does not. He-he’s not like that, all calculated and manipulative. You know him, he’s like a walking cheeseball.”
“He was a walking cheese ball. But at some point, you become the people you surround yourself with.”
“Okay, Sukuna. I fucking hate it when you’re all cryptic as fuck. You go on and on about how fucked up the people Eren’s around are. But you never once say what they actually do.”
He frowns, glaring at you.
“Why do you think Connie and Eren are fighting?”
You pause, thrown off by the question.
“Connie and Eren aren’t fighting. They’re like best friends. Connie’s even going to be in his next movie, Sukuna.”
“You said it yourself. It’s weird that Connie hasn’t commented on Eren’s whole vomit-gate moment. They’re filming a movie together, but they haven’t taken any pictures. And I can bet you ten bucks that Eren hasn’t said shit about him being there.”
You don’t respond. Because he’s right. Eren hasn’t said anything about being there. And Connie hasn’t even talked to you in weeks.
“It bothers you, doesn’t it? That he’s pulling away?”
“Eren isn’t pulling away, Sukuna. He just has a girlfriend, it’s obviously not going to be the same between us as before.”
“Bullshit. You know he’s pulling away. What does he do? Forget to text back once in a while but then flirt to make it better? Tell you you’re pretty when pictures of him and Hyla drop? You’re ignoring every gut feeling you have about him because you want to keep him around.”
“Fuck you, Sukuna.” you respond, warm tears filling your eyes.
This is what you hate about Sukuna. His persistent need to point out things you so blatantly choose to ignore. That he pokes holes in what you and Eren have, valid holes that bother you at night, that only validate what you think is true.
You need Eren more than he needs you. You like Eren more than he likes you. And he’s going to leave you far behind, at the end of all of this.
Sukuna reaches forward, fingers swiping the tears off your cheeks as he rolls his eyes.
“Stop fucking crying.”
“You’re so rude.”
“I’m not rude. You’re just a bitch.”
You smack his face out of your space.
“When you’re ready for it, I’m here to help you. There’s nothing I do better than revenge, doll.”
You scoff.
“Save your unadulterated rage for the camera. And don’t get too excited when I lean in to kiss you.” he responds, tucking your hair behind your ear and giving you a wink as he slides over to his mark.
You’re going to kill him.
--
Six weeks of freedom from Sukuna and you’re hiding in the bushes with Armin, Annie, Connie, Sasha, and Marco next to you. Hands locked together as you watch Jean and Mikasa in the distance. And you make your best efforts not to cry, to not fully sob at the second time you’ve been able to witness a love so warm.
It’s all so soft. So warm, so sweet, so much like Levi and Hange’s vow renewal that it makes your heart swell, to the biggest of shapes, for the two of them.
Mikasa is getting engaged. Engaged to Jean, who has always been so sure of her. So quick to run to her defense, to love her like it’s his second nature. They’re going to be together, by each other's side, drunk at award shows and holding hands in taxis for the rest of their lives.
Mikasa is wearing a white dress, soft and willowy, with her low cut Doc Martens. You convinced her that you just wanted to take her out for brunch, drive by the ocean a little bit before you leave town again. Because Jean had approached you, all squirrel like and antsy, and showed you the beautifully ornate ring he had gotten her and asked you to help her.
And Jean. Sweet Jean, he’s fumbling with the box in the pocket as he talks to her. You can’t hear what they’re saying, but you can quickly tell that Mikasa is comforting Jean. That he’s stumbling over his words, his feelings, but she’s standing there and holding his hand. Walking him through them.
And then Jean’s on one knee. Smiling up at her so hard he’s squinting, soft tears falling out of his eyes and her surprised expression. And she brings her hand up to her chest, right over her heart and falls to her knees to meet him, the two of them hugging each other so hard that it makes your chest squelch.
“Crybaby.” Marco mutters, reaching over to swipe your tears.
“Shut up.”
You look back at them, at Jean and Mikasa lying down in the grass tangled in each other's arms, and can’t wait any longer. The five of you - Marco, Annie, Armin, Sasha, and you - run up and pile on, the six of you crying in each other's arms, pink faces. Armin snaps a polaroid picture of Jean and Mikasa - her hands wrapped around his face and the softest look on his face when he smiles back at her. And then one of you and Marco crying, holding each other for good measure.
You reach for Mikasa’s hands the second Jean finally lets her go to hug Armin and Marco and your eyes are positively burning.
“Oh, Mika. I’m so, so happy for you.”
She’s crying. Her cheeks are pink, her eyes are red, and she has the full marks of love on her face. The softest kind of love.
“Thank you, Y/N. You-you’re a treasure. I love you. Thank you for not letting me wear that ugly green dress earlier.”
You laugh, wrapping your arms around her, and press a kiss to the side of her face.
Your heart aches. For green eyes, brown hair, and a soft smirk that no one else gets to see. For snarky comments, for shameless flirting, for every hurt feeling in your chest being smoothed over like it was nothing.
Jean and Mikasa make you long, long so ruefully for this feeling. The way they look at each other, the way he keeps tissues in all his pockets because she gets sniffly outside, how Mikasa is the only person who can handle him. The feeling you used to have.
You’ve decided then and there. You’re going to get him back. And luckily for you, you’re flying to Seattle and in nine hours you’ll be there with him. On his birthday, with all this love you’re going to share again.
You’re fish together. You’re not swimming forward without him.
“Hey. Where’s Con? We should get ready to leave soon.” Armin asks, pointing at his watch.
You look around at the crowd of you, Marco holding Mikasa’s hand in his as he admires the ring and gives Jean a smile.
Where is Connie?
You shrug as you tell Armin to stay, to keep taking pictures of the two of them, as you march around the garden, looking around for him. And you find him, knees hiked to his chest, crouched over with red eyes and a pink nose. You immediately reach for him and place your hand on his shoulder, which he immediately flinches at and then releases.
“Connie?” you ask, caught off guard.
He relaxes when he realizes it’s just you and aggressively wipes the back of his hand against his nose and smiles.
“Hey. My bad, they just got me too emotional in there. Fucking saps they are, I just love them so much.”
“Okay. Con, are you okay? You-you don’t look so good.”
He smiles again and it doesn’t reach his eyes. He’s sweating and…green. He places his hands against your cheeks and squeezes, his voice soft when he talks.
“Always the type to worry, aren't you? I promise I’m fine, Y/N. Help me finish packing because I actually didn’t start.”
“Huh? We leave in like an hour.”
“Exactly why I need your help!”
He stands up and pulls you along with him, your arms linked together, as you recruit Armin and Marco to help you pack. And you ignore the feeling, as you climb on the plane, nestled in between Armin and Connie, and focus on the important thing.
Brown hair, green eyes, and the soft smile.
You’re getting him back.
--
next part linked here
an, again: guess who is getting blocked on his birthday. eren no middle name jaeger.
taglist:
@k0z3me @kayleegomez @yihona-san06 @bsenpai @sweetenertea @mykyoon @violetmatcha @rebeccawinters @cutiejg @bokutosthings @bookwrmm @mblrrr @wheredidmycrowngo @somethinginyoureyes7 @chilichopsticks @okaystopwhore @you-always-made-me-blush @itzmeme @firelordazulaaaa @whoami-72 @g-ghostly @intimacywithceline @erensmoodygf @cocomellxn @princess-ackerman @jaegerfiles @cacapeepee @squirrelspoetry @rui-0836 @moonmalice @invisible-mori @sofiasber @bbybeeb @timetobegone @tee4str @ttokki2 @leave-rae-alone @ec3lipsy @officialsimpp. @gojojang @yookayyo @lordbugs @multiplefandomthings @iobeyfandoms @camilo-uwu @justanotherkpopstanlol @mel-star636
#ok yall#thoughts and prayers#next chapter will be a long one#and sukuna the man you are#seeingivywrites!#method acting#eren x you#eren x reader#eren x y/n#eren jaeger#eren jaeger x you#eren jaeger x reader#eren jaeger x y/n#eren yeager#eren yeager x reader#eren yeager x you#eren yeager x y/n#actor eren#actor eren x you#actor eren x reader#actor eren x y/n#aot actor au#aot#aot x you#aot x reader#aot x y/n#snk#snk x you#snk x reader#snk x y/n
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do i want another tattoo appointment? yes. should i get another tattoo appointment? no. did i send a request for another tattoo appointment? yes.
#ok yall#im dumb😭#i most definitely should not#i asked for 2 tattoo designs😭🫡#its truly an addiction#you just start planning the next one every time#personal#they are becoming more and more😭 and my family still doesnt know of the little bit bigger one i got in january#HAHAHAHA
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April Check-In
HI! I AM NOT DEAD I PROMISE, ANON!
Just... Ugh... It's been a stressful end of the month. I have not kept up with the weekly devlogs at all, partly because I had little to share each week, but also IRL was just too much. Head seems out of the water for now. Though I will be MIA for the rest of the week.
Onto the usual index:
Recap of last month’s progress
IF Events in the Next Month
Plan for the next month
Still long post under the break. If you want a mini version, head on over to itch.io as usual!
March Progress
From last month, what did we do:
Complete my French Comp entry. ✅ Not only did I write it all in less than two weeks (and it was full of typo that was so embarrassing), I also managed to...
Complete my SpringThing entry. ✅ Because that's the same game but in English.
Play more games! ✅Obviously having finished playing the Smoochie Jam AND all the French Comp game (quite a few good ones, voting was so hard), but also the SeedComp! and the Revival Jam (maybe?). The harvest of games for this month was bountiful!
Finish the Code Ch5 ❌ of Harcourt and edit Ch6 ✅
Finish fixing The Roads Not Taken. ❌
Things, it turns out... No, really...
Yay! Still managed to make a decent chunk of stuff.
Let's start with the bummer: still haven't fixed the borked games. Yeah... I really should sit down at some point and get down to it. BUT I did get some feedback for the Egg-game, and got extra code to fix the container issue. So... I just need to get to it.
Still haven't worked on coding on Harcourt, though I finished my part of the edits of Chapter 6. The file, full of comments, is back on his desk which... Well. Herm. MelS's computer just 💥(not like fire everywhere, but sudden forever black screen), corrupting about half of his data... which included his progress on that chapter and the endings. We've been working on getting his data back (tbh this project is the least of his worries, more important stuff is still gone), so hopefully we can get him back to editing and writing by next month (best case scenario). YEAH...
But before that happened, I managed to finish Les lettres du Docteur Jeangille for the French Comp, at the last possible minute yet again. I had the idea for month, but didn't start working on it until I was truly done with Teatime with a Vampire. It still managed to write over 15k words in 18-19th century French style (and full of typo because, only two weeks...) in essentially 1 and 1/2 week. EPISTOLARY STYLE game :D
After that was done, I got to play the Smoochie Jam and the French Comp games (it's on the IFDB), and started with the SeedComp entries (it's hidden because I'm the organiser). Lots of fun little game, some very sweet and humorous, some VERY DARK, some suuuper hot, and some that required a bit of noggins.
And halfway through the month, I sneaked a mini-parser game for the Revival Jam. I wanted to try my hand out with the old-style Speed-IF jams, that ran all the way back at the start of the century, which were just 2h long. TWO HOURS! No preparation, just you starting to code and stopping after 2hs. I tried my hand at Inform but... didn't have time to learn a whole new program and make my mini puzzle work in time. So I switched back to Adventuron, and managed to make something... in just over 2hs... I ended up Reviving old versions of the EctoComp instead (3h limit). Still it was fun to try to make a parser game in such short amount of time. It's called FIA: The Vacuum Cleaner, it will take you maybe 5min to play. And... it was so fun I kind of want to make basic micro-parser in that little universe. Some sort of multi-episode series where you have a small puzzle in front of you to solve. Like an intro to parser type of thing. Maybe in different parser programs? We will see. I might end up popping up here and there as tiny little games.
When THAT was done, I went back to work on the English translation of Jeangille, cutting it so close for the SpringThing deadline I thought I would not make it (for real, my files were sent at 23:58! I honestly don't think this was my bestest translation. It probably would have needed a few more rounds of polish and maybe some beta-readers but... :/ the computer explosion happened in the middle of all this so. I guess it was enough... I hope it was enough... But yay! I made it! No bug! Probably just typos! I didn't manage to make the cool animation tho...
AND I updated my website to add all of these juicy thingies!
AND AND! I was interviewed by the Rosebush Magazine last week!
So that was my month. We did good, we did bad, we are exhausted.
What’s happening in April?
Oh wow, already April. WHAT DO WE HAVE HAPPENING? So much, we have so much happening.
First off, we have competitions looking for voters:
Vous pouvez lire le français ? Venez jouer et voter pour les entrées du Concours de FI Francophone ! La date limite est le 4 avril.
Also on the 4th of April, is the deadline to vote for the SeedComp! (@seedcomp-if) games! You can find the forms here. We really really need voters!
The Spring Thing just released a new harvest of games (including meee :P ), and will open voting in a bit less than 2 weeks. Come play!
Looking to create some games instead?
The next @neointeractives jam just opened for submission! Come participate in the Dialogue Jam!
Looking to attempt creating a parser that is easy enough for beginners? Come check the Text Adventure Literacy Jam! You need a tutorial and 5 puzzles to solve!
If you want a deadline to finish your project, maybe check out : Finish Your Project Jam 2024
And for lovers: Amare Games Festival 2024
On the shorter side, and in May: Narrative Design Awards 2024 (ranked), 🔥 Fuck Capitalism Jam 2024 🔥 (unranked)
Interested in other IF events?
April 1st is Source Code Amnesty. Come share the code of your creations! (I've added a bunch of mine on Github today)
You can now register to attend the 2024 Edition of the Narrascope! IRL or Virtual, there are a lot of great talks this year!
We had so far 10 actual entries for the Interactive Fiction Showcase 2024 ! If you made something in 2024, consider showcasing it there too!
Note: @neointeractives will have jams all year long. One a month/or so. And the next Planting Round of @seedcomp-if will start as soon as the results are dropped.
The PLANtm for April
I, erm... should take it easy this month. But also, actually finish stuff, because the more I start, the more I have to fix/finish and it's becoming A LOT...
Play more games: I haven't covered the Revival Jam yet (I'm getting on it!) and the SpringThing has just started. So I have a lot of new treaties just for me! (And also that 2nd Rank is so close I can taste it!).
Finish the Code of Ch5 of Harcourt and edit the Ending Chapter: the latter should be easy since it is pretty short. The former... I just need to bite my tong and get to it! It should probably take me a day to code those last passages...
Finish fixing The Roads Not Taken. Or An Eggcellent Preparation. Maybe the other parser too (it just needs a smidge of polish).
Complete the TALJ entry. The deadline is at the end of the month. I already have the basic structure. I need: a tutorial, commands to actually make the game work. And words. So many words. (Did I mention here I'm making a maze?)
I think that's good. I'm trying REALLY HARD not to tack on another Neo-Interactives entry (we're doing dialogues and I LOVE THOSE). But I WILL TRY MY BEST TO KEEP IT FOCUSED ON THE CURRENT PROJECTS!
~
The 2024 To-Do List:
LOL, I've only done the website! :D
The hopefully maybe easy to handle To-Do:
fix the bugs in EDOC + overall the French version to match (waiting for Adventuron to get the French language)
fix the bugs of TRNT + find a way to add the missing pieces (giving up on the translation)
fixing the interface of LPM and the popups + check animal interactions
figure out the One-Button JavaScrip/jQuery issue...
edit the loading screens of the completed tiny games to include the program/format logo at least.
The 'Need a Bunch of Content to update but it's planned!' To-Do:
Update my website (bunch new title - also I don't think the logo clicky thing work...) + redo my itch page
Finish TTATEH (MelS dependent - this year should be it - for real)
Finish Exquisite Cadaver (half-way mark by this summer - manif)
Finish P-Rix - Space Trucker (main path at least)
Update CRWL (it's been almost two years... I'm getting ashamed)
The Unlikely But it Would be Dope To-Do
Finish The Dinner as it was planned (and translate)
Finish In the Blink of an Eye as it was planned (and retranslate)
Finish The Rye in the Dark City
Fixing TTTT (at least fixing, maybe try adding some storylets)
And finally The 'It's impossible, but one can wish' TO-DO:
Remaster SPS IH (if I managed to start this after completing the rest... I'm going to eat a whole sheet cake).
Start the IFComp project (2025? Might end up being a ST?)
#progress#update#interactive fiction#check in#monthly check in#Ok yall#I'm going on a break until next week!#Hope yall have a lovely month#(and maybe try my new stuf??)
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"furry inflation" (2024)
#my art#furry#ok to rb#had a meltdown about how none of my art feels like 'real art' today and then immediately drew this#not helping my case#anyway yall should get into the comic series im making please
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love when ppl defend the aggressive monetization of the internet with "what, do you just expect it to be free and them not make a profit???" like. yeah that would be really nice actually i would love that:)! thanks for asking
#yes i want things to be free like ??? that is not a weird desire#'but but it costs money to keep up' ok and? how is that my problem#the government has plenty of murder dollars they could reallocate a few to make internet services universal if they wanted#also these companies were perfectly capable of supporting themselves before the internet got drowned with ads so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯#edit: muting notifs on this post bc new additions have kind of petered out#so no one feel bad about adding something someone else has said‚ it is not bothering me im just trying to keep my#notifs page cleanish lol#also since i saw some people are being redirected to read my tags: firstly hiiiiii this is a special secret message for you:3#secondly i have learned since making this that the reason they were able to support themselves previously was because#of investors bankrolling everything#and theyre now finally realizing that theyre never going to actually make a profit and arent as willing to invest#however thats just a minor correction and doesnt change my overall point#once again. so many murder dollars#so thats why im just adding it here in the tags rather than making an actual correction#anyways . love yall 💕#origibberish#bigger gibbers
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they are Cancelling me for dealing with my grief as best i can . also for the vicious war Crimes
#book 24#the conversation between the gods at the beginning there is just this#greatest hits#all i say is vicious war crimes in a vague way#and you all start frothing at the mouth like rabid dogs#a lot of yall get the memo with the blorbo tags but also. seeing quite a few strange pulls#not exactly war crimes but Ok#sometimes normal vicious crimes can just be normal vicious crimes ok guys#can yall stop tagging this as israel u guys r fucking weird….#if u see this and think it is a joke about actual fucking horrific war crimes and ethnic cleansing. u may be fucked up in the head#please be normal#will people stop commenting on this please. none of yall r funny#legendary warrior
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feels like a good time to bring this back
#ok goodnight#make good decisions#love that this post has nearly 200 rbs and no one has started discourse in the tags. am i dreaming#<- tag cancelled someone started saying we are all n*zis#post cancelled all of yall are fucking annoying
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merlin and arthur hunting ghosts? yes, great, BUT hear me out
#merthur#bbc merlin#merlin talks to ghosts obviously#why wouldn’t he#let’s pretend arthur would be buried at some random cemetery ok#kinda modern au perhaps#this MIGHT be the quote from another bbc show in the flesh … those who get it i salute yall#i miss that show man
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Some haha funny doodles I did
#gravity falls#my art#gravity falls fanart#bill cipher#fiddleford mcgucket#ford pines#gravity falls fiddleford#fiddleford hadron mcgucket#young fiddleford#gravity falls ford#gravity falls stanley#stanley pines#gravity falls bill#billford#fiddlestan#stanford pines#young stanford pines#gravity falls stanford#young stan pines#ok thats enough tags#projecting my period cramps onto Ford Pines#hit tweet#how are yall doing#hope u doing good
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penelope of sparta
#hopefully this does well I NEED YALL TO SEE THE VISION#heyy heyy heyy loverrrrr#GODDDDDD#they are so cute i hope they dont get separated for 20 years#i just wanted to draw odysseus being stupid in love ok#the iliad#the odyssey#i guess#epic the musical#odysseus#penelope#odypen#my artwork#greek mythology#tagamemnon
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never grow up
satoru gojo x f!reader
tsumiki’s first date doesn’t go so well.
**part of my satoru as taylor swift songs series
content: megumi + tsumiki kiddos, mentions of heartbreak, reader says she wants to murder a child at one point, reader and gojo are soulmates, written for my girlies who are still waiting for love (I am the target audience)
an: my other gojo fic is personally victimizing me. like physically giving me pain in my soul its making me very mad. anyways here is a consolation prize (very old draft) while I try to revive that dumpster fire and not rip my hair out in the process. apologies to the gojo girlies im sorry :(((
-
You press down the ends of Tsumiki’s hair, setting her hair against the hairband that she had picked out. You feel her reach up, squeezing your hands as you give her hair one last spray lean down to press a kiss to the top of her head.
She turns around, pressing herself against your legs as Satoru and Megumi walk in, leaning against the doorframe. They’re both irritated - not big fans of the whole ordeal.
Tsumiki’s going on a date.
Satoru was very adamant about it at first. Tsumiki can’t go on a date. She’s only thirteen and she has no business looking at boys, let alone going out with one.
But she was just so excited, her tiny little eyes looking up into yours as she pleaded with you to convince him. So you did - his favorite dessert, a few kisses, and batting your pretty eyelashes until he gave in. And he always does.
Megumi wasn’t one to exactly stop it per say, but he had made his opinions clear. He’s not a nice guy. Dates are stupid. Love isn’t real. You chalk it up to the fact that he’s a morbid nine year old.
The three of you clump by the door as you watch her walk out the door, shooting you one last toothy smile before locking her fingers with the boy, Hiro she said his name was, and skipping down the walkway to where his parents were waiting.
Megumi trails off immediately, running up to his room as you and Satoru watch the car drive away. He reaches over, locking his fingers with yours, as he cranes his neck out the doorway to watch the car disappear down the street.
“She’s too young to go on a date, Y/N. What if he’s an idiot?”
You wrap your arms around him, squeezing his arms as he deflates against you.
“They’re thirteen, Toru. I bet they’re just going to awkwardly hold hands during the movie and freak out about it. It’ll be fine.”
“And what if something else happens and she comes home crying, love?”
“She’s growing up. Stuff like that will happen. We just have to be here to catch her, that’s all.”
-
You and Satoru are standing outside the movie theater, the rain pouring against the shade, as you wait for Tsumiki to leave the theater. She had texted you - two hours earlier than she was supposed to, much to Satoru’s dismay - and had said that she wanted to come home.
And when she comes out, you know you made the wrong choice by letting her go. Because there she is, crying puddles like Satoru said she would. Her eyes are swollen, her cheeks tinted pink, and the look on her face is just about to make you cry. She looks heartbroken.
She holds her hand out to Satoru, the two of them walking off to the car as you trail behind the time.
You feel horrible. You pushed her too hard, too early - letting your own past get caught up in what you were doing with Tsumiki. You remember it vividly. Pining in your room, saying no to dates because you knew your parents would never let you go. Getting stuck wondering about what could have been, how much love you lost out on just because someone stopped you.
You didn’t want to do that to Tsumiki. Let her lose out on feeling special, having someone hand her flowers, and making her smile just because she was only thirteen.
This is somehow worse. She’s only thirteen and she knows. The soul crushing feeling of someone not returning your feelings, thinking you’re weird, having love to hold onto that no one wants to return.
The three of you return home, not having uttered a single word the entire ride home. Megumi was still over at Yuji’s, having ran over to his house across the street the second the two of you went to pick up Tsumiki.
“Want me to go get him, Toru?”
“Not yet, love. We have to talk to Miki first.”
You press your hands against your sides, awkwardly ambling into the kitchen where she was sitting at the table. She had unwrapped the plate you had made her - that she was supposed to eat when she told you about how great her date was. Instead she looks deflated, pushing her fork across the sides as she picks out the smallest bites of food.
You sit next to her and watch Satoru zip around the kitchen, placing items in front of you. Three spoons, strawberries, and the industrial tub of chocolate ice cream that Satoru bought against your protests.
He leans forward, taking the plate in front of Tsumiki onto the side and pushing the ice cream in front of her. He hands the two of you spoons, taking the third, and opens the lid.
“Alright Miki. Let’s talk, yeah?”
“No.”
She lowers her head, digging her spoon into the ice cream as you and Satoru stand at her sides. He leans over, slinging his arm around her shoulder as he gestures to you to do the same. You both lean your heads against hers, the three of you still digging into the ice cream.
You’re not sure when she started, but when you look over, Tsumiki’s crying, her hold on both of your hands so tight you can feel the blood stopping. The three of you wordlessly eat the ice cream, until Satoru breaks the silence - nearly an hour later.
“Want to talk about it now?’
“I just got sad. When we got there, he asked me if one of my friends liked anyone because he liked her. Not me.”
You can feel the bitterness sticking in your throat - a heavy mix of guilt and anger. You never really understood child violence, but you think you’re starting to get it. Because why would he take her all the way there just to say that? Hold her hand on the pavement just to ask about her friend? You’re going to throttle him.
“I just wanted someone to like me like you guys like each other.”
You and Satoru look at each other over the top of her head, your heart squeezing in your chest at her words.
“Someone will, Tsumiki. I promise, okay?”
She crushes her hand in yours, nodding as she leans closer into you. You can see the gears in Satoru’s head moving as he looks over, shaking his head at you.
“Can I tell you something, Tsumiki?’
She looks up at him, the two of you looking into his bright, blue eyes.
“No one liked Y/N when she was younger.”
You glare at him, rolling your eyes. He can’t be serious.
“Really?”
“Yeah. She went months, years on end waiting for someone to like her back, you know?”
“Thank you for the reminder, Satoru.”
He ruffles the top of your hair as Tsumiki laughs, shaking his head at the two of you.
“What I mean is, Y/N and I had to wait for each other. We didn’t get it right on the first try or even the third, fourth, or fifth try. Y/N dated guys who were mean to her, I dated girls who didn’t even really like me, and we both were really, really sad about it.”
Now you get it.
“I waited for Y/N. She didn’t just come around super easy, okay? You’ll have to wait for your Y/N too.”
“Waiting for Satoru made it all the sweeter when I got to him, you know?”
She looks up, a questioning look in her eyes as she angles her neck upwards.
“The thing you’re waiting for is worth it. And you don’t have to worry about it not coming, because it will. And when it comes, you won’t even remember that you had ever waited, that you ever felt this way.”
You and Satoru both watch her wipe her tears with the back of her hand, nodding as she gives the two of you one last hug and pads off to her room. You and Satoru stay in the kitchen, your hands locked together as you eat the tub of ice cream Satoru left out.
You lean over, pressing your forehead against his shoulder as you groan. He places his free hand in your hair, soothing through the tangles at the ends of your hair.
“What are you groaning, love?”
“I should have just listened to you. She’s all sad now because I let her go.”
“That’s not your fault. It was right to let her go now because it was bound to happen one day.”
“I know that, Toru. I just…I don’t want her to grow up. I don’t think I really realized it before but people can hurt her. The bad way. And we can’t really protect her from that.”
He lets go of the spoon, circling his hands around your face as he lifts your head up. He’s looking down at you, stupid blue eyes glimmering, as he gives you a soft smile.
“She’s growing up. Stuff like that will happen. And she won’t be alone, because we’ll be there to catch her.”
“Don’t quote me back to me dumbass. I hate you.”
He laughs in response, leaning down to press soft kisses to your face - your forehead, cheeks, the tip of your nose. You shrug him off, pressing yourself against his shoulder again, his hand rubbing small circles into your side.
“Thanks for waiting for me, Toru.” you whisper, leaning closer to him.
“You’re so dramatic.”
He leans down, pressing kisses all over your face till you’re smiling so big you have to push him off. He always does this - tickles, kisses, squishes you to death until you smile at him again. He stops, pulling you close again as you both swing your legs against the chair.
“Thanks for waiting for me too, love.”
-
You and Satoru drag Tsumiki and Megumi to the bookstore the next day, much to Megumi’s dismay. You tell Tsumiki that she can pick anything she wants out and that the two of you will buy it for her.
She joins the two of you at the front, holding a laminated purple calendar in her hands. You crouch down, turning it over in your hands, as she looks at you. It’s a fifteen year calendar - which you didn’t even know they made.
“You picked…a calendar?”
“I want to count down the days. Till I find my you.”
She skips off, entering the line as you and Satoru follow, your hands locked together. He squeezes your hands three times, giving you a soft smile, as you return his three squeezes.
One squeeze for each word. I love you.
-
the satoru as taylor swift songs series masterlist
#ok yall#I didn't read this so I don't really know what it is entirely but#yolo swag!!!#satoru#gojou satoru x you#gojo satoru#satoru x you#satoru x y/n#gojo satorou#satoru gojou#satoru gojo#jjk satoru#satoru fluff#satoru x reader#gojo x you#jujutsu gojo#gojo fluff#gojo x reader#gojo x y/n#jujutsu kaisen gojo#gojo x read#gojo#seeingivywrites!#jjk x you#jjk x reader#jjk x y/n#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#jjk gojo
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RELEASE THE DA2 VARRIC ROMANCE ENDING BIOWARE
#i told yall ive been in varrichawke hell recently#i found out he was a planned romance or at least ending sort of and now im seeing my hawke from a whole new perspective#like its all coming together...i imagine they truly fall in love during inq after the fade but idk#this is my garrusxshep but for dragon age ok#please dont kill varric in veilguard i will cry :(#dragon age 2#da2#daii#female hawke#varric#varric tethras#marian hawke#dragonage#bioware#da#this was inspired by a few fanfics#cassandra pentaghast#cass#seeker#femhawke#art#drawing#my art#sorry for the drawing inconcitencies#lol#varrichawke#dragon age#dragon age veilguard
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does anyone realize how crazy it is to have the actor of a mostly headcanoned queer ship say the fans were never crazy and they were right all along after 10+ years of everyone just absolutely going nuts over the said queerbaited ship
#supernatural#dean winchester#spn#destiel#castiel#deancas#misha collins#im 20 i have been Experiencing supernatural and johnlock since i was 12 and merthur since wayy before that i have fought Wars#this is crazy#i love u hannibal i love u 911 (if u make eddie gay)#for the love of god by 'mostly headcanoned' i dont mean that it was never intentional#i am aware that they put the subtext in on purpose#they knew what they were doing#but my focus here is on the actor actually saying it because like#if its not mostly headcanoned then y was the entire cast denying it for years AND YEARS#like do yall not remember what jared and jenesn used to say#there have been many many many instances where the cast has made us feel crazy/stupid for saying anything abt destiel#im just saying TO ME its crazy that actors and creators talk so openly about these things now !!! again i was raised on merlin and sherlock#ok also im confused on the queerbaiting part#everyones saying its queer coding and not queer baiting but cant they be true at the same time ?#im not being dumb on purpose i swear im just confused#like yes dean is very much bi coded and their relationship is queer coded but if the creators deny everything#and we only get a last minute confession after 11 years#that doesnt count as queer baiting ?#someone smart explain this to me 🙏
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WAKE UP BABE!!!!!ITS TLNM'S ANNIVERSARY TODAY!!!!! 22ND SEPTEMBER!!!!!LETS FUCKING GOOOOOOOOOOO happy 7th anniversary to THE movie ever 🫶🫶
Hq ver
#AHHGGGGGG TLNMMMMM!!!!!!ITS TLNM'S DAYTOFAY EVERYOEN SHHHHHHH#casually posting this at midnight how awesome is that#sorry if iuh. clog the tlnm tag today i have a bunvha things to post 😼😼😼#ouhhh how much this movie means to me....i have such a soft spot for it this movie means rhe WORLD to me😭😭ICNAT DOIT#ok ill shut up now#my art#ninjago#ninjago fanart#lego ninjago#tlnm#the lego ninjago movie#lloyd garmadon#cole brookstone#jay walker#kai smith#zane julien#nya smith#woah buddy tahtsa. lotta tags!!!!idc thooohchhxshxhc#gif#tlnm anniversary#ninjago movie#more exciting stuff to come soon jusy wait and see yalls
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hello to the three people still in the sally face fandom i hope yall are doing great
#time to post my shitty art then fucking dip for three months#praying for the 56 people who follow me yall are SOLDIERS#sally face#sal fisher#larry johnson#sal sally face#larry sally face#sally face fanart#uhjhhhh ok i think thats it HAVE FUN GUYS!!!!!!
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