#ok i need to stop my rant and go shower

[ihavesomejays]

quick shapey sunday thing i painted to procrastinate on my drawing assignment

detail shot under keep reading

[habits-white-rabbit]

UGHHHH

[belovedhoon]

daydream- p.js

paring: jay x f! reader genre: smut words: 1.8k (short i just NEEDED to get my jay thots out...) fandom: enhypen contains: smut, somnophilia (prior consent), oral (f! & m! rec), unprotected smut (don’t be silly wrap ur willy), creampie (yum), jay should be a warning himself… taglist: @hmusunoo @st1llm0nster @lonelybutterflytae @pshbites A/N: blame the daydream track video for this fic... jay is SO HOT

Synopsis: jay comes back from a long day at work and all he wants to do is fuck his wife…just because you’re sleeping doesn’t mean you can’t have fun right?

fic under cut >>>>>

It was around 11:30 pm when Jay got home, and he hoped that you would still be up. He’s been hard ever since this morning when he woke up to you mouthing at his clothed cock. He can still remember the feeling of your hot breath ghosting over his throbbing cock. As soon as he was coherent enough and realized what was going on, he pushed your head down further on his clothed hard-on and let out a deep groan. Just as you were about to pull his erection from his briefs, his phone rang and Jay let out another groan this time in annoyance. Of course, he’d get a call at this time… Jay reached his hand out to the phone that was ringing annoyingly in his hand and sighed when he realized it was his assistant Jake calling. Leave it to Jake Sim to cockblock him once again.

“What is it, Jake?” Jay answered the phone his tone gruff and annoyed. As soon as Jay uttered those words, Jake started ranting about how things got messed up at the office and Jay was barely paying attention because as Jake was panicking on the phone you had pulled Jay’s cock from his briefs and were now placing wet, open-mouthed kissed all around the shaft. Jay sighed blissfully as you placed his bright red tip in your mouth and began to suck gently.

“Jay! You need to come in like as soon as possible! I don’t know how to fix this!” Jake rushed out. Jay rolled his eyes at Jake’s panicked tone before letting out a gruff “ok” and hanging up the phone. Jay groaned a third time, from both the feeling of your mouth on him and from the fact that he knew he wasn’t going to get to cum because he had to go to the office. He placed a gentle hand on your cheek causing you to look up at him prettily, your mouth full of his throbbing cock and he moaned at the sight of you looking so beautiful with your mouth filled with him. Oh, how he wished he could finish this with you right now.

“Y/N, darling…I’m sorry but I have to go to work.” Jay let out regretfully. You took him out of your mouth with a pop sound then pouted up at him. He sighed at your pout, knowing you were not happy about this. “But Jay–” You started but stopped as you saw Jay’s stern glare.

“Darling, you know I don’t want to but I have to, Jungwon messed up some of the paperwork and I have to go fix it.” Jay said to you, watching as your face fell. He felt bad that he had to leave, but at the same time, he was the CEO and had to go and fix things at his company. You nodded solemnly at his words before tucking him back in his briefs. He smiled thankfully at you and then got up out of bed before opening the door to the ensuite bathroom to take a shower.

After Jay was done with his shower, he walked back into your shared bedroom with just a towel wrapped lowly around his waist. You could feel your mouth water at the sight of Jay’s bare chest, watching as a lone water droplet rolled down his chest and abs down to the plush of the towel. You needed him so badly… Jay turned away from you to rummage through the walk-in closet and dropped the towel and your eyes roamed over his muscular back and down to his toned ass. ‘God he was so hot’ you thought to yourself, you could feel yourself becoming even more wet at the sight of his naked body on display for you.

“I can feel your eyes on me, Darling…” Jay said and you could just hear the smirk in his voice. You nearly moaned at the sound of his cocky voice. “Jay…I need you…I’m so wet for you…” You let out in a sultry tone, hoping to convince him to stay. Jay groaned at your tone and you watched as his hands clenched tightly at his sides. Just as he was about to come over and give you what you both wanted his phone rang again. It was Jake again.

“Jake. I’m on my way relax.” Jay said annoyed then hung up the phone. Jay turned to you and sighed at your disappointed expression, he too was also disappointed at the fact that he has to go to work with a fucking hard-on and that he has to leave you so needy. “Y/N…I promise when I get home, I’ll give you the most mind-blowing head… I’m so sorry I have to leave right now.” Jay said to you. You nodded in agreement at his words.

“What if I’m asleep by the time you get back?” You asked playfully. Jay thought about it for a second before saying, “Well then I guess you’ll wake up with mind-blowing head…if you’re okay with that.” Your eyes widened and you nodded your head enthusiastically. Jay chuckled at your words, telling you that he needs you to use your words, to which you let out a whiney “Yes please Jay” Jay smiled in contentment before kissing you goodbye and leaving.

Now that Jay was home, there was only one thing on his mind, and that was giving you that mind-blowing head he mentioned hours before in the morning. He walked through the dark house noting that the lights were all off, assuming you were in the bedroom reading your book. As he made his way to your shared bedroom, he opened the door and saw you lying on the bed with nothing but his large t-shirt on. He smiled at how peaceful and adorable you looked. He walked to the closet and took his clothes off and then proceeded to go wash up in the bathroom before returning to to the bedroom and smiled when he saw you had turned on your back, making it easier for him to do what he was about to do.

Jay walked over to where you were sleeping on the bed and leaned down to place a soft kiss on your lips before trailing the kisses down your neck and collarbone to the bottom of the shirt you were wearing. He pulled the shirt up and noticed you didn’t have panties on under the shirt and groaned at the information. He spread your thighs and began to leave kisses on the inner parts of them. The whole time he placed kisses on your inner thighs he watched your face to make sure he didn’t wake you up too soon, before the fun could begin. Jay got impatient just wanting to taste you so he placed his mouth on your folds and stuck his tongue bringing it to glide between your folds, moaning at the taste of you. Jay licked from your clit to your entrance which began to quickly become wet at his ministrations. Jay took your clit between his lips and then proceeded to suck harshly on it, watching as you let out a moan in your sleep. He brought two of his fingers to your soaked entrance and teased your hole, before slowly inserting them inside you. He began a steady pace as he sucked on your clit. You began to stir in your sleep finally beginning to wake up, as you woke up your hands immediately fell to Jay’s soft hair and pulled roughly at the feeling of his mouth on you.

“J-Jay…I’m gonna cum…” You let out your voice raspy with sleep. Jay’s eyes shot up to your own, pulling away to murmur, “Go ahead, cum for me darling.” Before placing his lips back on your clit and sucking it into his mouth roughly, moving his fingers at a faster pace. You could feel your high fastly approaching and you let out Jay’s name in a chant before you fell over the edge and cumming hard in his mouth, Jay moaning as your juiced soaked his face. Jay rode you through your high by thrusting his fingers slowly before he stopped as you pushed his head away in overstimulation. Jay crawled up to you hovering above you and kissed you passionately, sliding his tongue into your mouth tangling with your own, letting you taste yourself on his tongue.

“Can you do one more? Can you be good and take me?” Jay asked his voice breathless as he spoke against your lips. You whined out a “Yes Jay please I need you…” Jay smiled at you and pulled away to remove his briefs and crawled back on the bed on top of you. He teased his hard leaking cock against your clit before placing himself at your entrance. He looked up at you for permission one last time to which you nodded and he took that as a sign to enter you. He slowly pushed his thick tip into your entrance, you gasping at the feeling of being stretched so much from just his tip alone. You always struggled to take your husband’s big cock even if you have done this a thousand times with him. Jay moved his hips slowly until he was halfway inside you and groaned at how tight you were around him. He stopped to let you adjust knowing it was a lot for you to take. You whined moving your hips to let him know you needed more and Jay thrusted the last bit of himself into you.

“F-fuck Jay…You’re so big!” You whined out clawing down his back with your manicured nails. Jay cursed at the feeling of you clenching down on him so tightly. “Ah shit Y/N you’re squeezing me so tightly darling…I need you to relax so I can move.” Jay let out gruffly. You sighed and tried to relax at the feeling of Jay’s thickness. Jay began to slowly build up a fast speed and was thrusting into you at a rough pace. You were a whining, moaning mess as Jay pounded into you roughly. You could feel yourself getting higher and higher, almost going over the edge of the cliff, just needing that one push. Jay could tell you were close so he brought his hand down to your clit and began to rub it intensely. That was the push you needed because you quickly felt your release wash over you, clenching down tightly on Jay causing his hips to stutter as he also came, spilling his thick, hot release into you, groaning out your name as he did so. He pushed his hips weakly into you to ride out both of your highs before he stopped. You could tell he was still hard inside you, so you looked up into his eyes in confusion.

“You don’t think we’re done do you?” Jay said smugly, a smirk on his face. You were in for a long night….

[mooki3-bear]

I Need You pt.2 (paige bueckers x black!reader

Part one <3

Summary: You and Paige finally unite

Warning: Just cursing

word count: 1757

Three months. It’s been three months since me and Paige went on our “break”. 

The first month was the hardest. Just a lot of crying, bargaining, rants, and Chipotle. I sat in my puddle of despair, wondering what Paige was doing.

What she was thinking, hoping the thoughts were about me.

My worst thought was thinking that she had moved on to someone new, or someone that has always been there.

The second month was the month that I told myself to stand the fuck up.

This month had its ups and downs. I moved in with my best friend who welcomed me with open arms. She’s been more than supportive since the very beginning. She comforted me, fed me when I didn’t feel like eating, and took the remote from my hands every time I felt like turning on a UConn game (I'm healing slowly but surely).

I even picked up a hobby! I started taking a ballet class to keep my mind off of things! My bleeding feet are a VERY good distraction.

The third month is when I felt like a new and healed me. My skin was clear, my curls were popping, my body was giving. I felt better.

However, no matter what I did or how much better I thought I was…I can’t get her out of my mind.

“Come on! You’ve been stuck in this house all day! It’s getting sad Mookie” my bestie, Quenlin, says while ripping the blanket from my body.

“My dance class got canceled today and new episodes of my show came out. I just thought I could lay here and wallow all day” I moan while pulling my hoodie over my face. I turn my head to see Quenlin shaking her head.

“Girl, you smell like ten cans of ass and your hair looks a mess. You cannot let this girl get to you like this” She turns to open the curtains.

The blinding light burns my eyes as I wince and pull a pillow over my face. She rolls her eyes as she lays next to me on the bed.

“Let’s go bar hopping tonight! You love that shit” she yells as she shakes my aching body! She wasn’t wrong, bar hopping was probably my favorite activity. I lay there and contemplate whether I should get cute and have fun or lay in the imprint I have made in the bed and cry.

“I’ll buy you Chipotle” and with those four words, I hopped in the shower, got dressed, and was ready to head out the door.

9:30 Pm

Me and I were on our second bar of the night and I felt alive again. I had flashes of images of Paige in my mind throughout the night but I decided I would deal with that issue when I went home. 

“Girl, can you go order us some drinks? I gotta piss real bad” Quenlin said, doing the potty dance at her grown age. 

“Go ahead, and stop doing that shit” I laugh as she waddles off to the bathroom. I make my way up to the bar and order me and my friend vodka cranberries. 

I twiddled my thumbs waiting for the drinks, when I finally heard it.

“Hey beautiful” My body froze when I heard the voice I had longed for so much but also dreaded hearing. I slowly turned my head to see the beautiful blonde that had been occupying my mind for months.

She looked so good, but also drained.

Words tried so hard to leave my mouth but nothing came out.

“You look good. Like, good. Guess the break up was good to you” She lets out an awkward laugh as I am still in shock but gain the ability to speak.

“Eh. It was ok for me. A lot of crying hehe” I mentally slap myself, who the fuck says that. 

“Yeah, same” She looks down at her feet trying to figure out what to say next.

“Listen, can we talk, please? I wanna fix this. I-”

“Unh Unh! What are you doing here” Quenlin appears from thin air as she jumps in front of me to confront Paige. This breaks me out of my trance as I jump to defend Paige. 

“No, Quen! It’s ok! Me and her are just going to talk outside” I put my hands on my best friend's shoulders to calm her down. She turns to look at me and then back at Paige.

“Fine, but if you try some manipulative shit, it’s me and you” she pokes piage with her finger before walking away. Paige looks back at me “I never liked her. I just want you to know that.”

I laughed as I walked to the door, Paige following close behind. When we get a good distance away from the bar we stop and just look at each other.

I can tell she’s trying to find words to say, I couldn’t find any either.

We stood in silence for a few more minutes before one of us finally spoke.

“I'm sorry. I'm sorry that I made you feel like shit for so many months. You should have been my priority and I didn’t do that” Paige let out a shaky breath before looking down at the ground. I waited for her to continue but….she just stopped.

“Paige…that's not the only reason why I wanted to take a break. Yes, you ignoring me was a big part of it but there was so much more” She finally raises her head to look me timidly in the eyes.

I take a shaky breath before continuing. “It was the petty comments, the constant arguing, and the insecure feeling I always felt” I started choking up on my words, and the memories of me and the girl I love screaming at each other came flooding back.

“I'm sorry! I was just so stressed with basketball, the interviews, and the constant attention that I guess I got stressed” She quickly tried to defend herself, flailing her arms in the air.

“I understand how stressful that could be but…I would've been there for you. I could've listened to your rants, helped you during solo practice, and helped you calm down when you were nervous about an interview…but you shut me out and started bullshit arguments for no reason. I love you so much. I just wanted to help you” I felt a tear roll down my face.

I saw Paige’s face change from defensive to vulnerable in the middle of the conversation.

I let out a sigh as Paige drops her head, tears falling down her pretty face. “Paige, I love you so much. You’re probably the best thing that has happened to me in a long time” I take her hands in mine “but when we have an issue, you can’t just shut me out or brush it off. We need to talk. We need to express ourselves or else it’s just gonna get worse.”

Paige raises her head once more, looking into my brown eyes with her bloodshot blue eyes. “I know…I wanna be better for you baby. I will do anything to make it up to you. I just want things to go back to the way they were” She brings my hand to her lips, placing a tender kiss upon them.

I felt my skin turn hot as her lips connected to my skin, it’s kind of funny how we were together for so long and she still managed to make me nervous.

“I know it seems like an empty promise but I swear I will do everything that I can to make it up to you. I’ll communicate better and I will make sure to do everything that I can to remind you that you're the love of my…I can’t fucking lose you again y/n” she wraps her arms around my body, leaving another kiss on the top of my head.

On instinct, I wrap my arms around her to as I close my eyes to breathe in her perfume.

I was still angry with her but somehow I knew deep down that she was serious about wanting to be better for me. 

She pulls back to look into my eyes before she places an unexpected but loving kiss on my lips. I felt like I was floating on air as my lips touched the ones that they have been craving for three months. With this simple act, she knew that I forgave her 

As we pull away she rests her forehead on mine. 

“Can we just start over please, I miss you so much” Paige giggles while also sniffling. 

I let out a snort as I placed my hand on her cheek “Well we got a long way to go until we are back to the same place but, I think we’ll be ok”.

2 days later

“Ok! I think that’s the last of my shit” I let out a sigh of relief placing the last bit of my clothes back into me and Paige’s shared closet. I fell back into our bed, missing the smell of our sheets. 

I let out a grunt as Paige ran into the room and jumped on top of me. “Jesus Paige! I think you broke one of my ribs” I try to push her off of me as I let out a laugh.

Paige keeps her position on top of me as she puts her face into the crook of my neck. “I'm sorry, baby. I'm just happy you're back” she sighs as she kisses my neck.

“Ew, can yall wait to fuck until after I leave,” Quenlin says as she brings me some more of my stuff in from the car. I laugh as Paige finally rolls off me with a dramatic groan.

I walk over to Quenlin take the box of stuff from her hands and place it on the floor. “Thank you for letting me stay with you,” I say as I hug her.

“Of course, anytime! However, if this shit happens another time me and Paige are gonna have to tussle. You hear me” she yells towards Paige.

“I love you too, Quen” Paige blew a kiss to her.

Quen rolls her eyes before giving me a kiss on the cheek and leaving. 

“Why must y’all fight over me”

“Because you’re the most important thing to us, baby” Paige leaves another kiss on my lips before hopping back onto the shared bed that I will never leave again.

Y'all I am so fuckin sorry this came out so late! But here yall go <3

[januaryrabbit]

how seventeen would act around their s/o while drunk heheee

pairing: seventeen x gn reader, established relationship, fluff

word count: 1.8k

warnings: alcohol, cursing, mentions of sleeping over and physical affection w/ the boys but it’s meant in a fluffy context, not a suggestive/mature one!

other disclaimers: lowercase intended, probably typos, setting is hanging out with all the boys and with you!!!!!

a/n: i just realized in my wip post i said "crush" instead of "s/o"........WOOPS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! BUT ANYWAY hello everyone, i’m finally back with another post! i;m sorry for the very long hiatus, i p much always have something going on in my life lol @-@ but i have time now to actually write!!! i hope you enjoy this one hehe -mina

✩‧₊˚clingy drunks:

mingyu: this man will not leave you alone. he is in love with you. and he’s cheesy! in a sweet way :) will kiss your hand every few mins, lean on you, or put his arm around you so you lean on him hehe. i think he would also want you to reciprocate the clinginess too hehe,,,it makes him feel loved :3 i can see him moving your hand to his hair to ask you to play with it, and if you stopped, he would just take your hand and put it back in his hair LOl. he strikes me as someone who would take care of you (kinda like how he takes care of drunk hoshi hehe) and makes sure you're ok, even if he's drunk himself :]

seungcheol: omg omg HES GOING TO DOTE ON YOU SO MUCH!!! “jagi are you ok” “jagi do you need water” “jagi i’ll walk you to the bathroom, be careful”...he doesn’t realize that he himself is wobbling around and spilling water, LMAO. he just wants to help his baby!!! would def ask where you’re going if you get up, ask you to stay over with him, etcetc. would always have an arm around you and constantly LOL. would also go on a random rant about how protective he is of you HAHAHA!! like “Y/N . IF ANYONE MAKES YOU UNCOMFORTABLE. TELL ME RIGHT AWAY . I WILL DEFEND YOU TO THE ENDS OF THE EARTH  EVEN IF IT’S MY OWN FRIENDS I DONT CARE WHO I HAVE TO BEAT UP (svt: BRO WTF?????) . GOD I LOVE U SOMUCH .” pls give him some water and a kiss!!!

junhui: i don’t think he’d necessarily be like talkative or doting, but i think he’s the type to just want to be around you and would sit really close to you :3 he almost gives me like Protective Bf vibes in the way that he’d just wanna be by your side to make sure you’re feeling ok too. plus, junnie just likes your company! i can picture him sending a lot of smiles toward you every few minutes because he’s so happy you;re his partner and he feels so comfy with you next to him :) also he likes leaning his head on your shoulder and he WILL show you cat pics the entire night…..pls comment on all of them or he’ll get sad. he also gives me the vibes of someone who has lazy days with his s/o after a night of drinking hehe…napping, hotpot and movies :)))

✩‧₊˚loud/emotional/(verbally) affectionate drunks:

soonyoung: MESSY U WILL HAVE TO CARE HIM !!!! did you see him on lee youngji’s show?? so cuteeee :( he would just shower you w/ affection heheh. im picturing him hugging you from behind like how he hugged the ice in the youngji ep and he would nestle his head into the crook of your neck and reach over to kiss your cheek :3c he would announce like every 20min how much he loves you to the whole room like "THIS IS MY PARTNER I LOVE THEM VERY MUCH THANKS!!!" and would post blurry pics of the two of you on his story with typos "i lvoe tehfm sonmchch" HAHA!! youll definitely have to sober up to take care of him hehe. would definitely start crying bc he loves you so much and YOU have to comfort him……you and mingyu get him to the car that night because he can’t walk by himself. the next morning hes like babe that was so fun round 2 of drinking tonight???????????? (horanghae pose)

seungkwan: BRUH KWAN GETS INTO (JOKE) ARGUMENTS WHILE HE’S DRUNK I HAVE NO DOUBTS!!! 90% of the time he’s trying to pick a fight with mingyu or chan i just know it I KNOW IT TO BE TRUE!! but with his s/o, i think he’s the type to be like HONEY THIS ONE IS FOR YOU and he starts belting a love ballad and singing directly to you HAHA!!! (vernon: why are u always trying to outsing everyone. no one else is singing.) seungkwan ignores vern’s comment and keeps going tho. he almost moves himself to tears by how much he loves you and how much love he’s pouring into his performance LOL. you tell him you love him too and that he doesnt have to sing VERY LOUDLY IN PUBLIC to profess his love !!! its not that serious pls sit down!!! and hes like MY LOVE FOR YOU IS SERIOUS . and that’s how you end up with a pouty and drunk kwan!!!!!!!!!

chan: oh my sweet chan,,he would just shower you with affection LMAO like “i love you. you’re amazing. you look so beautiful right now, you know that?” type of thing. he’s just the biggest simp hehe. i think hes also the type to just wanna have fun, he'd prob cheer you on if you took a shot like FUCK YEAH BABE GO OFF!!!! but i also think that he would be doing EVERYTHING for you. "i'll pour your shot!!!!! don't lift a finger SERIOUSLY!!!!!" asks you every 30min if youve had water. (you: yes. i had some 30min ago. when you GAVE ME SOME.) gets you snacks. if you needed to throw up he WILL hold your hair with a drink in the other hand (for him)!!!! he also helps you put your jacket on at the end of the night. it doesn't matter how drunk he is, he's firm on taking care of YOU!!! <3

✩‧₊˚(physically) affectionate drunks:

wonwoo: he’s all smiles for you hehe. clings onto your arm whenever you’re near him. he wouldn't be too loud or anything, but i think he'd shyly whisper compliments to you now and then about how you look nice or how much he loves you. i think he’d be one of the more chill people, he just feels happier than usual bc of the alcohol hehehhe. usually, wonu is pretty good at keeping himself composed when you show him affection. but when he’s drunk, i think he’d react a little more…he strikes me as someone who’s more verbally/physically affectionate when it’s just you two, but around friends/family he tones it down. but when he’s drunk i think he would be comfortable having you sit on his lap or having an arm around you <3

jihoon: i am convinced lee jihoon is a different man when he’s drunk!!!!!!!!!  i have a hot-ish take when it comes to drunk uji…omg woozi would SOOOO open up physically and emotionally to you..and he’d be the type to always, Always have an arm around your waist and constantly hold your hand, looking at you with a smile that leads all the way up to his eyes. he’s someone who has dealt with a lot in his life, but in this moment, he’s so grateful to be here with his friends, and someone he loves that also loves him for who he is. the reason i think he’d be like this is juts because like. he doesn’t drink much, but when he does, feelings he’s been keeping to himself finally come up to the surface. also his face, neck and ears are constantly bright red because of the alcohol LOL. but ALSO they'd be red the next day when he realizes how he behaved in front of you hehe…. don't tease him too much about it or he'll die of embarrassment!

seokmin: dont ask me why bc idk but i think he would ruffle your hair constantly because youre so cute. then he would get distracted and talk to the bros for a bit, look at you again and remember how cute you are and ruffle it again sorry i dont make the rules!!!!!!! dk is definitely the loud/funny drunk hehe…hes the type to be giggly/try to make everyone laugh :) but i think he’d definitely try to make you laugh the most !! mostly in terms of physical affection though, i think he’d just dote on you a lot…like you know in the dingo video how he kept kissing woozi??? yeah he does that to you. along with the hair ruffles. and the attempts to get you to laugh. good luck. you’re going to drown in affection from this man LOL. 

✩‧₊˚happy/chill drunks:

vernon: HE WILL CARE YOU this man is all vibes. he’s just here to have a good time lol. you’ll probably be the drunk one who needs to be taken care of :3 but if he was somehow convinced to get really drunk, i think he would still just be vibes. but happier vibes. i think he would just laugh at everything and keep a hand constantly on your knee heheh. also i think he would encourage seungkwan’s antics more when he’s drunk i’m just saying .

minghao: minghao is just relishing in the moment of enjoying his time with his friends and partner~ he doesn't strike me as someone who drinks much, kinda like vernon. he'd be more focused on having a good time with everyone! i think he's the type to have hangover remedies ready for you at home for the next day. i think he would also be the type of bf to know when to cut you off LMAO like “y/n’s had 4 shots….hyung STOP pouring them another one!!!!!!!!” he just seems like he'd be prepared to take care of his partner :) you're so lucky!! he’s also the type to observe you and take pictures/videos if you’re doing something funny while you’re drunk LMAO!!!!

joshua: josh is a giggly drunk i have no doubts. also in the dingo video that man was RED af!!! would probably be like “im fine im SO SOBER RIGHT NOW…BABE TELL THEM HOW SOBER I AM!!!” he is not sober. i also think he would be the type to compare hands with you LMAO. you’re just like ???? you know how big both our hands are???? you’re literally my bf???? and hes like I JUST WANTED TO CHECK OK!!! tbh he seems so fun to be around LMAO like he on the way to the hangout hes like “babe lets match each other if u drink i drink” and ur like HELLO SIR???????? WHO IS DRIVING US HOME?????? (jeonghan does and he sleeps over.)  he just wants to have FUN and let loose with the homies and his partner!!!! consequences are for TOMORROW, y/n!!!!!! (he might start sulking if you don’t agree to match him but it’s fine you both know your limits hehe)

jeonghan: i see him as someone who doesn’t go too wild when drinking. kinda like vernon and minghao, i think he’s more there for vibes than getting fucked up lol. if anything, he’s doting on you because he finds you so cute, especially when you’re drunk hehehe. HE would be the one to ask you to do aegyo or something and when you do he just dies of cuteness lmao. i think he would also tease you in silly ways, like convincing you that he and s.coups are actually long lost brothers who found each other in college, or that seungkwan is a natural blonde. and of course you believe him which is the funniest shit ever to him!!!! LMAO!!!!! your shock and wonder at his blatant lies is the cutest thing to him. don’t worry tho he’ll tell you the next day nothing he said was true, except for when he said he loves you :)

[4pfsukuna]

Hiii❤️can you write some headcanons about sukuna with a asexual reader? It could be modern sukuna or any version. Of course you dont have to if youre not comfortable with it🙏

OMG Can i? This is my first request you can bet Sukunas masochism i can! Originally i had no idea what to write and then i had 17 ideas.

Then i began writing couldn’t save it as a draft it got deleted so now here’s the second idea i had.

It’s not often someone steals Sukunas attention but you do it with ease.

At first he’s annoyed by the way you stare at him with a deadpan gaze. No thoughts, no emotions just gaze.

He’s used to either fear, adoration or lust but you just give him a blank stare it’s torture…he kind of likes it.

• He likes listening to you read, sing and cook you do those things with such passion it engulfs you to the point of you forgetting he’s there.

That’s when he takes the time to Admire  your hair, dark pink curls that resemble the soft texture of cotton Candy… kinda smells like it to. (It’s vanilla) 

and no matter how many times you swat his hand away he cant help it…its pretty. Like you.

He’s infatuated and how dare you not be equally infatuated with him as he is with you?!

You get lots of…gifts. The head of a goat, skull of…something and the blood of your enemies. You don’t want to question how he got any of these things.

“What? Why do you not look happy?” He questions yet youre speechless unaware of the same dead gaze you’re still giving him. He cant read it but he knows its not joy.

“I shower it with gifts and yet still no emotions, these human things are so confusing”

“I’m not a thing or an it im a human and im not emotionless im asexual” 

Now its his turn for the blank stare except you can read his and hes completely confused.

You laugh at his idiocy, how can you not. Or maybe the irony of someone like Sukuna trying  to get you to show emotions.

He wants to hate you laughing at him but he likes the way your plump lips reveal your sharp teeth and you’re shaking with laughter.

He definitely ask uraume about asexuality. Uraume just stares— the same stare you give and it dawns on him uraume is also asexual. 

Sukuna is very hands on hes just adapted to different ways.

Biting? Yes he will bite you just for his own shits and giggles. Hard enough to leave bite marks but never enough to break skin…ok maybe once but he thinks its okay because your blood didnt make him want to eat you.

hes learned your blank stares at this point and this one means you think he’s an idiot.

He also will just randomly pick you up and sit you on his lap as you rant about the characters in your book. And when you think he isn’t listening…

“Sweetheart if they were real id dismember them and make a necklace of their blood for you to wear” he promises wrapping a curl of yours around his finger ignoring the countless times youve told him to stop touching your hair.

This results in you biting his hand. 

He likes having his hair played in, he won’t say it aloud but the soft groans he lets out that turn into snores is all the confirmation you needed.

Imagine how angry he was waking up to an empty bed, hair not being played with to see you talking to one of the guards in the middle of the night.

“Jealousy doesnt suit you, king Sukuna” and he hates when you call him that as if you were nothing more than just a servant and he meant nothing to you.

He uses all 4 arms to make sure he doesnt wake up in the mornings without you. Sometimes he’ll peak one if his eyes open and it’s never long before you feel his gaze and smile.

“Im still here… Now go to sleep before i poke you in your eye” Did you just threaten him? He smirks turning his head the other way… he wasnt willing to risk that.

You sometimes wondered if being asexual bothered him… it didn’t. He like that someone just wanted to spend time with him no fear, no lust, no requirements to do or be anything.

Especially after a long day of being king he just wants to rant about how annoying everyone is especially you since you weren’t there because you were soooo busy.

You went shopping with uraume, who seemed to like you for Sukuna. Though After spending the day with uraume you understood why they were bestfriends. Uraume was equally as unhinged just quiet.

He hates when you use your pointer fingers to direct his frown literally upside down. And your giggle that you let out… he needs to punch something— or turn away so you cant see him actually smile.

When it comes to dates he takes you to grand places he’s not a date person. He heard you talk about stars once so he takes you to the top of the castle and explains each constellation watching the way you hold onto every word with fascination.

Or he shows you his domain for the first time and tells you about war stories and as you look around at the piles of skeletons you notice this may be where he got the skull he gave you as a piece of him. 

You realize he might have a crush on you.

Or the day he avoids you completely after you yelled at him about plucking a fish from water just because only to wake you up at 2am to show you the koi fish pond he had installed with so many different colored fish.

Hes shocked when your tiny body hugs him, laughing in pure excitement before leaning over the lake admiring each and every fish.

Its when you turn back to him the same adoration on your face this time aimed at him that his brain lags for a second. He finally… FINALLY got what he’s been wanting for so long.

and like the greedy man he is he wants more vowing to say yes to whatever you want.

He doesnt process you running back into his arms with pure excitement until you speak.

“Can we get more? I think a bigger lake. Sukuna could you imagine a wall in our bedroom with these fish? Or a secret mini pond in the throne room that can only be accessed by us” 

And the sounds of we, our bedroom and us along with the way your bright eyes gaze up happily and hopefully at him makes his insides hot. 

You never talked about the status of your relationship but he was yours the moment you gazed at him with that deadpan expression. And the way his name rolled off your lips through your razor sharp teeth infatuated does nothing to explain how he feels about you.

[col-islander43]

Jersey pt.2

Pt.1

Jamie Drysdale x reader

Warnings: crying, proposal

Word count: { 2,471}

"That ring looks good on you." His breath tickled your ear, his whispers making you blush and affecting you more than you'd ever like to admit. You softly squeezed his arm resting around your waist with one hand while the other was busy stirring the sauce for dinner. 

Last week, Jamie compromised with himself. After calming down, he explained he'd love to marry you at that moment, but he wasn't ready yet, and he didn't want you to feel pressured to say yes after what had happened. You reassured him, telling him you'd never feel pressured, especially not with him, and yes was the only answer he was getting even if he asked you a hundred times. To compromise, he came home with a promise ring the day after, nearly giving you a second heart attack in not even 24 hours. 

The ring, a slim silver band with a gorgeous, small, oval diamond sitting in the middle, now resting on your ring finger, took your breath away when you layed your gaze on it for the first time. He went a bit on a rant, scared it was too much.

"I did a bit of research, and the diamond is April's birthstone. You know my birthday is in April, now you have something that represents me with you... Along with the necklace. It's one of the simple designs because I know you like simple and this way I can go a bit overboard when I get you the real thing. Do you like it?"

For most of the rant, he was looking down. If he had looked up, he'd seen the tears and love in your eyes. The love you had for Jamie was unexplainable, the thought he put into things multiplied that and he'd never understand how much it meant to you when he did because that was also unexplainable.

"It's not the ring I'd like but it'll do for now." 

You dropped the spoon and turned around so quickly that you nearly gave yourself a whiplash. "What do you mean? J, I love you, but you need to stop saying these things because I'll end up in the hospital." his hands were still on my waist while yours were resting on his chest. His face taken over by a smile or a smirk, you weren't really sure.

"Ok. I'll stop." Pecking your lips, he nodded his head towards the stove. "Dinner's ready." His face, what you knew now, had been taken over by a smirk. He pecked your lips once more before leaving to go set the table.

----

After dinner, knowing you were exhausted from work, Jamie tried convincing you to go take a shower as he cleaned up. After he realized you weren't giving in, he guided you to the bathroom, promising he'd join you before you knew it. You almost cried on the spot, your body consumed by exhaustion, a shitty day at work, and Jamie's overflowing love you didn't know if you'd survive the day.

Now joining him in bed, he softly smiled at you as he took you into his embrace. Just like every night, he placed several pecks on the top of your head before rubbing your back.

"I don't think I've ever told you this before, but falling head over heels for you was unexpected but so easy." You had turned around in his arms, when he spoke up, resting your chin on his chest. "I know I fell pretty hard when Trev bumped into you, at the coffee shop, and you were more concerned about his head instead of your coffee-stained shirt." he softly admitted, his cheeks turning pink "I called my mom afterwards, told her I could be in love and she asked me if I got your number. I told her I didn't and she scolded me, she was happier when I told her Trev owed you coffee." 

Giggles left my lips, thinking about him getting scolded by his mom "Who knew Z not paying attention would make me meet the love of my life." Your hand, subconsciously, went to play with Jamie's hair "It payed of for once. Plus the sound his head made when it hit the door was what concerned me, I still surprised he didn't get a bump."

His body softly shook with laughter as did yours thinking back to that moment.

"I do know for sure when I realized you were the one. It was when I called you at three am, the night Trev came home drunk, and I was on the verge of a breakdown because I wasn't happy with how I had played the past few games. You came over after I told you I wasn't ok, and I didn't ask you to come over because I knew you were exhausted between school and work. Even though you were exhausted you came over, you stopped for pizza, chicken nuggets, and fries because you knew Z needed to eat something and because you know eating with you helps calm me down even at three in the morning."

You wrapped your arms around Jamie's body, softly squeezing, a way to thank him for being vulnerable "You would've done the same thing. And we all know how difficult Trevor can be when he's drunk especially when he keeps insisting he's just tipsy."

He placed a couple of kisses on your collarbone before speaking up again "I still can't thank you enough for doing it because I was seriously doubting myself, you, chicken nuggets, and fries helped me overcome those doubts. You also took care of Z so I could rest up. You made sure we were both ok before you decided to rest and I could never give that back to you."

You were crying, you didn't want to, but Jamie always said the right things which started the waterworks. You tried to hide it, but it was useless. He looked up at you, giving you a sweet, soft smile before wiping away your tears and pecking your lips softly "I don't want you to give it back to me because I'd do it every time if it meant I got the amazing, loving, caring, and handsome boyfriend I get every day."

Blush covered his cheeks at your praise "I love you, princess."

"I love you, Jimmy."

----

"Babe! Come here real quick!" You dropped the laundry you were folding, rushing over to the living room after Jamie's urgent yells filled the apartment.

"What happened? What's wrong?" 

He turned to you with a smile "Nothing's wrong. I have a gift for you. Why do you look so concerned?"

You rubbed your forehead, trying to calm your racing heart "You were yelling, you never yell so I assumed something was wrong. Why do you have a gift for me?"

His arms pulled you in as he moved you to stand in front of the dinner table where a plain box layed "What? I can't get my girlfriend a gift? We agreed on no spoiling, but that doesn't mean I can't get you a gift every now and then." 

He softly pushed you forward, keeping a hand on the small of your back as you looked at the box skeptically "It's not gonna jump at you, I promise. You'll love it."

You opened the box, revealing a reverse retro Ducks jersey. When they first came out, you rambled to Jamie about how good he'd look in it and how you were stealing all his reverse retro merch once it would be hanging in his closet "Turn it around." he whispered as he wrapped his arm around your waist, wanting to gauge your reaction.

A gasp left your lips as a grin took over your face, taking in the back of the jersey. His number 6 glaring back at you proudly, instead of his last name it said: Be my

You turned to Jamie, concern written over his face, you tried to erase it by running your finger over his features, but that only seemed to deepen it "You know my number is 6 and I'm yours so I want you to be mine. Do you wanna be my 6?" his voice was unsure making your heartache, when would he understand you weren't gonna leave him?

You nodded as your throat clogged up and tears rolled down your cheeks "Of course I'll be your 6. I've always been yours." You locked your arms around his neck as he pulled you in for a kiss. A kiss filled with love, like he was trying to tell you how much he loved you through that kiss. "Thanks for explaining it, Jam. I was trying to process it, but I understood."

He placed his forehead on yours not wanting too much distance between the two of you, drying your tears "I knew you would, I just wanted to be sure 'cause Z told me you wouldn't."

"You had to explain it to him didn't you?"

He nodded his head, giggles leaving both of your lips "Yeah. He was a bit confused." 

"He needs to give me more credit." You had started to sway the two of you, not wanting this moment to end.

"I told him you'd understand, he refused to believe me but I think I convinced him a bit when I told him you graduated college early." You pulled back a bit, looking at him with confusion written over your face.

"He didn't know?"

Jamie shook his head at your question, pulling you in again "Apparently not. I don't think he even knew you went to college in the first place."

----

Too lost in your own world, you didn't hear the front door close, you did however hear the loud screeching voice that followed "Jimmy! Jimbo!"

The man in question placed his head in the crook of your neck. You had retreated to the couch after you put away his gift and made lunch together. Together being the keyword as Jamie hadn't let go of you once and neither had he when you layed down. His hand had been playing with your hair, legs entwined under the blanket as your hands were resting on his cheeks softly tracing his features, loving smiles covering both of your faces. 

"Should I ignore him? Maybe if I do he thinks we left and he will too."

You placed your hand on the back of his head to keep it in the crook of your neck "You know that's not happening." you mumbled back

Trevor's voice was coming closer, but his volume didn't lower "Did she say yes? Hello! Jamester!"

Quiet giggles escaped your mouth as Jamie whispered "That's a new one."

Trevor appeared, his face consumed by happiness, his eyebrows were pretty high up on his forehead making him appear a bit scarier than he was. "And?"

"What are you doing here?" They both said at the same time

Trev's face changed from happy to confused in a second "What do you mean what am I doing here? I live here and our agreement has expired."

You looked between the boys as you asked "What agreement?" your voice laced with amusement and confusion

"We agreed Trev would stay out 'till 6 so I could pull this off." You both sat up so Trevor could join you guys on the couch

“Yeah, it’s 6.04. I gave you 4 extra minutes which is a lot considering I wanted to barge in here for the past 15 minutes.”

“You waited outside for 15 minutes before coming in?” a shy smile adorning your lips

“Yeah. Duh."

Jamie and you made the same face. Head tilted slightly to the right, eyebrows a bit furrowed.

“What? I was excited, two of my favourite people are getting married. Or maybe getting married? You said yes right? Cause if you didn’t it would be weird since you both haven’t let go of each other. Anyways I didn't wanna ruin the moment in case he hadn't asked yet.”

You hadn’t left Jamie’s embrace yet since he pulled you in after he proposed and his arms squeezing you told you he wouldn’t let you go any time soon which you had already guessed especially when you both had sat up and he still hadn't let go.

"I said yes." Trevor squealed. He actually squealed and neither you nor Jamie were expecting it.

"So when is the wedding? Did he give you a whole speech? Did she cry? Show me the ring." The questions made your head spin as you were trying to keep up with the adult bouncing around the living room.

"Buddy calm down I just proposed, we haven't even called my mom yet. And I gave the speech last night because I didn't want to make it obvious that I was gonna propose." At his admission, you whipped your head around to look at him. 

"That was your speech? J. that was so sweet, and I did cry. But how could I not when your words meant the world to me." He placed a kiss on your forehead as you turned to Trevor holding your hand out to show him the ring.

He held on to your hand as he fanned his face looking like a wine aunt at a family gathering. An emerald stone sat in the middle of a silver band which had diamonds in it all the way around, next to the green stone sat 2 smaller diamonds on both sides. It was a beautiful ring, and when Jamie said he was gonna go all out with the proposal ring he meant it. 

You took your hand back as Jamie asked you to remind him to call his mom. Before turning back to Trevor to ask what he wanted for dinner as you were cooking, you kept your gaze on Jamie's face and placed a kiss on his cheek "I forgot to tell you, but thank you for remembering about my Grandma's ring." He responded with a smile and kiss on your forehead. 

When your Grandma passed away, your mom kept her ring not giving it to you even if it was one of your late Grandma's wishes. She claimed it wasn't in her will and therefore it wasn't something official, Jamie remembered how upset you were about it as she meant a lot to you so when he went ring shopping and saw the ring with the emerald stone he knew it was the one, the picture of your Grandma's emerald wedding ring engraved in his brain.

Trevor cleared his throat, making you both look at him "So when do I become an uncle?"

Jamie sighed, you hid your head in his chest "I'm not doing this." Jamie mumbled but by the laughter that was escaping from Trevor's mouth, you knew he had heard it.

------------------------------------------

Hello, hello. This has been in the works for a couple of days, but I struggled with finishing it because school is kicking my ass. I managed tho.

Thanks for all the love on pt.1 it means a lot 😊

Feedback is appreciated, hope you guys enjoyed!

[red1culous]

Stupid Moth part 1

Chapter: 1, 2.

“I’m sorry, I’m not being thick but you need to start from the beginning,” Wanda fills up your glass then swiftly tips back her own, downing the remainder of her fruity drink. 

You sigh cradling your glass until the liquid stills before taking a few swigs of the liquid feeling it burn as it travels down my throat. “Again?” you question buying yourself some time. “I’ve repeated myself twice now.”

The look she gives you is one of pity and love. “Babe I’m sorry it’s just that you and Nat have always been together. So this…” she gestures to the space in between the two of you, “…is very hard for me to understand right now.”

“Yea same” you groan. 

Wanda watches tension tighten your forehead. She reaches over to smooth the frown lines appearing there. Her smile is soft as she loops her arm over your shoulder and pulls you into a side hug. 

“There’s too much baggage for breaking up” she whispers into the space you are both staring blankly at. “You two dated for what? 3 years?”

You hum. “Four if you include the Jane Austen styled excessively over dramatic pining period.”

“You know,” she laughs and separates from you to look into your eyes. “Some people are meant to be together. Sometimes they get it right on the first try, and sometimes it takes years. You and Nat, you’re that some people.”

Your smile is a sad one. “And some people, when they break up, that’s it” you sigh. “They’re done.”

“It can’t be that bad” she says placing a hand on your knee, her thumb drawing comforting circles on the skin peeking through the hole in your jeans. 

You chuckle softly and duck your head in order to hide the tears that have started to well up despite your attempts to stop them. 

She knows. She always knows. She pulls you into her and you can no longer contain the tears that fall. You cry into her shoulder like you’ve done so many times before. 

“It’s going to be ok” she mumbles into your hair. “You’re going to be ok”.

“I wish I could blame this on Hydra but I can’t. I know that she can love. And it hurts so much more because I know she just can’t love me the way that I love her” you sob. 

Wanda just hums running her hand soothingly up and down your back. 

“Am I that unlovable? Because she made me feel that I was everything and then one day she got bored of me and just left me hanging out to dry” your words are a little hard to understand but Wanda knows enough to make out what you mean. 

“She still loves you” her voice is small as if she is trying to convince herself.

Your sadness morphs into anger as you ball your hands into fists holding Wanda even closer as a means of grounding yourself. “Yea I guess then her love language is leaving me on read for days on end and spending more time with everyone else and treating me like I have the plague or something” you spit out.

Wanda waits as you rant and spew into her shoulder. She holds you tight rocking you slowly side to side. She lets out intermittent little hums of acknowledgment letting you know she’s still listening to your tear drenched monologue. And then it’s over. The catarrh is out. She waits a few more seconds listening to your quite sniffles.

“So,” her voice is a mere whisper. She breaks the silence, “what do you want to do now?”

You sniffle adjusting your head to sit more comfortably in the crook of her neck. “Spend my days watching sad movies, crying, eating tubs of chocolate ice cream and only showering when I can’t stand my own stink,” you wipe your nose with the back of your hand before continuing. “How’s that for a plan?”

“Sounds like a plan to me, sweetie” she says while prying you away from her and wiping your eyes with the pads of her thumbs. She softly kisses your forehead and leans back against the sofa pulling you into her side. 

“You pick the movies and I’ll get the snacks.” 

Two movies in and the both of you are heavily debating something from When Harry Met Sally. You are animatedly waving your arms around as Wanda keeps interrupting you where she thinks your argument is weak. She laughs at your (very obviously flawed) theories and you cringe-gag-laugh at her impression of Sally’s public orgasm scene in the cafe. 

“Listen, all that doesn’t matter right now because, Y/N, I’d totally date you and take care of you” she says not missing a beat. 

Your face turns bright red and you’ve already forgotten what you had wanted to say before she blindsided you with her statement. “…what?” you manage.

“Only for a day” she adds a smile teasing on the corner of her lips.

“Excuse me, what?” now you’re offended. What did she mean a day.

“OK five working days, tops.”

You sputter unable to say anything. Your face feels hot as if the frown, eye-blinking and mouth opening and closing were working overtime. 

Its then you notice the full blown smile plastered on her face. A laugh erupts. A full-bodied-body-shaking laugh. It is surprisingly deep and bubbly like an expensive bottle of wine. You can’t help but chuckle too. 

Apparently something you had said was the funniest thing Wanda had heard all week. She continues to shake for what felt like forever.

Her quaking finally starts to recede and she wipes tears from the corners of her eyes. 

“I’m sorry baby. I promise I wasn’t laughing at you” she manages while trying to catch her breath.

“I swear if you say, ‘I was laughing with you’…”

“You gotta admit it’s sorta funny” she slaps you on the shoulder then takes your hand and laces her fingers through yours.

You pout at her mumble something incoherent which sets her off into another bout of giggles. You wouldn’t admit it, not now at least, but it did feel good to laugh and smile. 

Just then, you let her slip into your mind for a minute. You see her green eyes and red hair and catch a phantom whiff of her perfume. It hurts.

It hurt that you could never love each other in a physical way. But that was like the tides, the change of seasons. Something immutable, an immovable destiny that could never be altered. No matter how cleverly you might want to shelter it, whatever it is you had with Nat wasn't going to last forever. Not when it was so lopsided. You were both bound to reach a dead end. That was painfully clear.

Wanda throws a piece of popcorn at you without taking her eyes off the movie playing on the TV screen. She must have heard your thoughts. You snuggle closer into her and push Nat to the back of your mind. For now. 

For now.

A/N: For @imnotasuperhero I hope you enjoy this. It's not as angsty as I would have liked but I didn't want to keep sitting on it.

[leiawritesstories]

Happy follower celebration!! <3<3<3

May I request:

“I really want to see you first thing in the morning.”

Thank you so very much!!! 🥰💕 here you gooooo. enjoy!

Word count: 938

Warnings: none

500 followers celebration prompt fills

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Hey." Aelin tucked her phone next to her ear, holding it with her shoulder as she unlocked her car.

"Hey, Fireheart." Rowan's voice flowed through the speaker, just the sound she needed to hear after a hell of a long shift at the restaurant. "Just clock out?"

"Yeah." She pulled the clip from her hair with a relieved groan. "God, it was such a long day. So many people. So many kids. So much bullshit."

"Bet you didn't take any bullshit."

"I try." She switched her phone to speaker and set it in the cupholder before backing out of her parking spot and heading away from the restaurant where she worked. "Seems like all the ridiculous crap comes on the weekends, though."

"Want to come over?" He sounded so hopeful. "You can rant all you need, love."

She glanced at the clock. "I'm gonna swing by my place first to shower and get out of these disgusting clothes, ok?"

"Take your time." He paused. "Wait no, not too much time. I wanna see you."

She laughed. "Has anyone ever told you you're the clingy one, buzzard?"

"Don't see anything wring with it," he returned, chuckling. "I gotta go, but I'll see you soon?"

"Yeah." She blew him an invisible kiss. "Love you, buzzard."

"Love you too, Fireheart."

An hour later, showered and changed and carrying an overnight bag, Aelin walked up the front steps of Rowan's townhouse, knocked twice, and walked in. "Ro?"

"Hey." He jogged down the hall, met her in the entryway, and tipped his head down to kiss her soundly. "I made food."

She perked up, kicked off her shoes, and bolted for the kitchen. "You're the best, Ro!"

He followed, shaking his head fondly at the way she was so much more excited to see the food than him. "Maybe I should've thought twice before proposing, love. Seems you're more in love with food than your poor sad old fiancé."

"Stop that, drama queen," she laughed. "I'm just hungry, and your cooking is amazing." She gave him a broad, suggestive wink. "I'll get a whole free chef when we get married."

"Trust me, love, I can handle myself in the kitchen." He wrapped his arms around her from behind.

"You like it better when I handle you, though," she hummed, casually serving herself a big bowl of the soup he'd made.

Rowan spluttered, his face flaring bright read. "Aelin!"

She burst into bright laughter. "I'll never get tired of seeing you all riled up, love."

He mumbled something incoherent about just how much she loved doing that to him and wisely changed the subject. "Wanna watch a movie?"

"When have I ever said no to that?" she grinned. "Let me guzzle this soup like a starving madwoman first and then yes, absolutely I do."

"Take your time, love," he laughed. "I need dinner too, y'know."

"Oh, so you didn't make this whole pot of soup just for me?"

"Nope." He grabbed his own bowl ad filled it up. "Sorry to disappoint."

"Guess I have to knock a star off your Yelp review," she teased.

He laughed softly and nudged her towards the kitchen table. "For someone who's supposedly so hungry, you sure aren't doing a lot of eating, Ae."

Once she had a full, satisfied stomach, Aelin helped Rowan clear away the dishes, waving off his protest that he could do it all by himself, and went to the hall closet to get a big armful of fluffy blankets. Rowan's mom kept buying him throw blankets every fall and winter, insisting that he needed "splashes of color to liven up his boring gray house." Rowan pretended to be annoyed, but Aelin knew he secretly loved his collection of seasonal blankets. She loved the blankets, at least.

"How many of those does one person even need?" he teased as he came into the living room to find her snuggled into a blanket cocoon on the L-shaped couch.

"Not all of us are human furnaces, buzzard," she returned. "What are we watching?"

"Hmm...well, I'm in a classic cinema mood tonight."

"Oh gods," Aelin mock-groaned. "Why aren't you ever in a rom-com mood, you know, like a normal person?"

"Since when have I ever been a rom-com person?" Rowan asked dryly. "Besides, I know you want to watch The Godfather."

"You're too good at the bribery thing." She moved the blankets aside enough for him to sit down. "C'mere, buzzard."

Rowan obediently settled down beside her, stretching out his long legs so she could cuddle herself snugly against the toned planes of his body. He turned on the movie, turned off the lights, and tucked Aelin's blankets comfortably around her. Knowing full well she probably wouldn't stay awake for the whole movie, he idly combed his fingers through her hair.

Aelin lasted an hour before she was asleep on his chest, her breath brushing his collarbones in even pulses. A tender smile curled his lips as he watched her peaceful face. He watched the rest of the movie, turned the TV off, and rested there on the couch, his fiancée asleep in his arms.

She blinked awake a few minutes later. "Movie done?" she mumbled.

"Mhmm." He kissed her forehead. "You made it a whole hour; I think that's a new record."

"You're mean." She poked his chest, not causing any actual harm thanks the the layers of blankets. "Le's'go upstairs. Sleep. Bed."

He chuckled. "Are you propositioning me, love?"

"Nope." She shook her head. "I just really want to see you first thing in the morning."

Gods, the way Rowan's heart fluttered at that simple statement.

~~~

TAGS:

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[fishtankwater]

Good morning! could u do kazuichi nsfw alphabet :) gn or fem reader plsss and pref top reader have a nice day :D

OH THANK FUCK I FINALLY GOT A REQUEST

I was getting so bored waiting on one 😭

Uh anyway Tysm to this anon

AND HOLY SHIT I HAVE RSV. I AHVE A BABY VIRUS. A BABY VIRUS. SOBBING

Anyway my bad for ranting

Kazuichi souda x GN!Reader

CW- nsfw shit that’s it idk what to put here anymore 😭🤛🏻

Currently listening- Dumb Dick

A-Aftercare

Bro…Kaz would give so many kisses and praise the SHIT out of you. But if you degraded him he would need praise cuz let’s be honest he would think it’s true and probs cry

Also he’ll probably struggle to know what you want and ask 2663825372 questions. PLEASE shower with him after he wants it. Do it. You know you want to

B-Body part

Him- his muscles 💀

I forget he’s muscular sometimes it’s genuinely so weird to think abt. But PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD SQUEEZE HIS BICEPS he loves it sm.

You- let’s be honest. The titties if u have em if not you chest in general

That whole vicinity is just chefs kiss to him If you have tits he will put his hands up ur shirt and squeeze them while cuddling and he’d probs calm them his “best friends” 💀

C- Cum

The first time he came as a kid he probably got scared cuz he didn’t know what it was and called his dad and was like “HELPPP” 😭. Ok I’m sorry for bullying him

His cum is probably sweet with a salty aftertaste if that makes sense and he cums a small amount so uh savor it while you can 😘

D-Dirty secret

Bro has so many pics of you naked in his camera roll he also records your moans/whimpers while y’all fuck tbh

AND HE SAVES EVERY VIDEO OF YOU HE CAN FIND he will become a professional stalker the second y’all become intimate or start dating

E-Experience

Unpopular opinion but I think he has a decent amount of experience like— not with women with the men AND HE WILL STILL DENY TAHT HE IS BISEXUAL “no I only did it because I was bored” AHHAHAHSHSHSJSHSJ

F-Favorite position

Please ride him. Please. Do it

OR SUCK HIM OFF IN THE SHOWER SUDHEHDHDBDJHE

“D-darlin-A-ah!”

STOP I CANT BRWTAHE

G- Goof Off

Depends what mood he’s in like sometimes he’ll be chillin laid back not caring how he acts and sometimes he’ll be stressed and just want to love you n shit

H- Hair

Def dyed his pubes pink LMAO

but there’s little to nonexistent hair

J-Jack off

Always thinks of you when it happens cuz he’s too embarrassed to ask for your help (poor baby)

L- Location

Anywhere anytime you ask he provides 💀

He prefers the bed to shower tho tbh

M-Motivation

Anything you do lol

But specifically seeing ur thighs, ass, or seeing you change or the thought of you showering like you being naked he has a urge to come in there with you tbh

N-Nuhuh

No hurting you bedsides a lil biting and maybe spanking. He also doesn’t wanna degrade you like he loves you and has no reason to think otherwise. Also other than overstim and biting he doesn’t wanna be hurt like bro 😔

O- Oral

Giver 💪🏻

Bro…the only time he will EVER overstim u is during oral like 😍 he loves your taste he can’t help it

When receiving he will buck his hips squirm whimper and cry tbh like out of happiness like it feels so good he can’t help it

P- Pace

Slow and steady wins the race

Bro will edge himself he doesn’t wanna go fast n hurt you to rush for it to be over he lovessss making love to you

Q- Quickies

“NOT HAPPENING!” -kazuichi souda

R-Risk

YES bro if your ok with it he will do it

He loves having public sex sm

S-Stamina

As long as you want him to go he will go

Wanna go for 5 hours? Ok bet he may not have much stamina that’s why he loves riding or cowgirl

T-Toy

Nope nada nee

HE wants to pleasure YOU not some toy

U-Unfair

No he would never but when you tease him he gets so shocked like jaw dropped to the floor but he loves it it’s like OSNHECSHSGHEHBRHEJHEH

V-Volume

WHIMPER-ER

Bro when he does moan he will moan so loudly too like are you trying to get the neighbors to call the cops on us??

W- Wild card

He gets jealous of gundham and pulls you aside to fuck the shit out of you like one of the only times he ever told you is when he’s jealous

X-X-Ray

I watched a video on yt that gives headcannon dog their dick size and tbh it seems kind of accurate his was 5 inches which I think it would maybe like that or 6 inch anywhere between 5-6 inches tbh (6inch= 15.24 centimeters 5inch= 12.7 centimeters for my non American people)

Y-Yearning

He’s horny 24/7/365 ok shut up

Z-ZZZZZZZ

He will be tired but try to stay awake to eat drink take a shower and then he’s out 😘

[brandwhorestarscream]

Hello!

Since the tfa versions are being born first: Octane and Astrotrain helping blitzwing with the triplets?

Aksjdjaka ok I'm gonna be honest I don't remember a lot (read: any) of their canon interactions so this is all gonna be wild conjecture

Blitzwing is the first of the Kalisians to fall to the reincarnation curse, and he's got three of them. Astrotrain and Octane probably tease him relentlessly, calling him "mommy blitzy" and generally just being awful, poking fun at him for being all domestic and having to stop basically his whole life, dropping everything to care for his three newsparks. Blitzwing doesn't want this: being a single parent is hard, being one with no preparation or expectation is worse, and having to do it with three newborns is enough to make anyone crack

Eventually, the other two needling him leads to a particularly ugly breakdown. What this looks like is up in the air: my go to for this sort of emotional overload is angry tears and screaming and desperately shaking hands, but I don't think that's terribly likely for Blitzwing. Then again, he's more stressed and sleep deprived and frustrated and scared than he's ever been, cornered in a situation with no way out other than death, so. Who knows. Maybe that is what happens when he finally snaps: everything bubbles over at once and he just explodes at them, body venting stress as hard and fast as it can in any and every possible way. Scalding air blasting out of his vents, charge crackling like lightning in his field, tears of liquid rage streaking and his face as he rips into the other two in the angriest, scariest, most vicious screaming rant they've ever seen. His mouth is moving faster than his mind and he doesn't even realize it when he yells that he wants to fucking die to escape

When he's finally done he stands there huffing and steaming for several seconds, expression pulled tight with rage before suddenly falling slack. His knees visibly wobble and suddenly he falls straight down, ears ringing and vision blurring and suddenly so, so dizzy. He hears a sparkling crying, distantly, and realizes he was holding one of the baby Blitz's and holding them way too tightly while yelling at Astrotrain and Octane. He tries to rock them, bounce them, begging them to, "Stop crying, s-stop crying, please stop crying I can't take it anymore...!" His shoulders start to shake with exhausted, silent sobs and he squeezes his optics shut, feverishly begging his newspark to stop. He hasn't slept a full night in over a month, he hasn't been able to shower or eat or do anything because the three of them require so much care and he's had no help at all.

After a tense moment of shock, the other two share a panicked look before Astrotrain hurries to carefully, cautiously take the sparkling from him. Blitzwing folds in on himself, wrapping shaking arms around himself and sagging so far forward in exhaustion that his forehelm touches the floor before he collapses onto his side, vents shallow and heaving. His voice cracks as he whispers that he can't do this anymore.

Now, obviously that outburst is cause for concern. He's been slowly unraveling since the triplets were born and he's fraying at the seams: he's never had to take care of a sparkling before, let alone three. He has no idea what he's doing, he's so exhausted he can barely stand. He needs help. The other two aren't terribly experienced but they're confident they can keep the bitties alive, at least. As Astrotrain has the baby Blitz, the little blue one, it falls to Octane to drag him to the washracks. Sits him down on the floor and helps get him cleaned up: he's covered in crusted dried energon and spit up snd Primus knows what else. He's uncharacteristically gentle while washing his back and arms and wings, while Blitzwing passes out against the wall within a single klik of their arrival.

After that, he's put to bed and the two of them watch over the triplets while he catches up on desperately needed rest. They don't leave even after he wakes up, and only after he shuffles out of berth do they realize just how awful he looks. His colors have gone pale and muddy, his optics are dim. Even after nearly 15 megacycles of recharge, his servos are still shaking minutely. His wings are pinned at their lowest point on his back, and his helm hangs. His express barely twitches when he speaks. He's so drained. He looks like all the life has been sucked out of him. He can't keep doing this on his own. It really will kill him, or drive him to do something drastic. Mental health services aren't exactly widely available on either side of the war, so it'll be a long time if he can talk to anyone, if he can talk to anyone at all, but in the mean time the other two triple changers resolve to lighten his load. Offering to stick around and help juggle the three littles, offering to take them on alternating nights so their poor carrier will never have to go without rest for so long ever again. They're of the last of their kind, and at home so long ago he'd never have been left all alone with this kind of big life event. It's no wonder he was going crazy with all this stress. Blitzwing is incredibly grateful, and thankfully his mental state improves with their consistent assistance and the sheer relief.

He's not just glad for the help, but... he's glad it's helping him be closer with his sparklings too. It sounds backwards, that he could feel more loving toward them now that they're spending less time together. But really... deep down, he had started to resent them. He didn't ask for children. He didn't ever plan to have them. And suddenly they arrived and he'd had no say in the matter: he lost any hope of ever sleeping or being clean or unoccupied ever again, and as much as he was loathe to think it... part of him had started to feel bitter toward them. It wasn't their fault and he felt like a monster, but drowning in the reality of surprise parenthood had been slowly cultivating an ugly, awful seed somewhere deep on his psyche. The greatest relief of all, perhaps, is feeling that angry seed start to crumble and abate: at last, now, he can focus on loving them and giving them the best life he can, rather than wondering if he can even survive another day.

[lindszeppelin]

I am the anon who sent you the long message, I am also a dude , Im of a rare breed in the fanbase , dont seem like there is alot of us here and thats ok lol I have sent you something before actually about how when men know we know. And I will say that over and over again. Seems like alot of the anons you get seem to be from people who are losing faith in that and think whatever Miss Gerber has with Austin is real. A man knows when he found his wife, not to get all preachy and sound like a religious crazy person but there is legit a whole bible verse in the book of Proverbs about it. I am 31, still young but old enough to know , especially as a married man myself when a guy has found his wife, he isnt hiding that shit. When i proposed to my wife we were on vacation and I legit facetimed my friends when she was in the shower and told them the news, up there squealing like a woman excited as hell LMAO. Austin is someone who wears his heart on his sleeve, if he saw that life with Kaia we would know it will show. So all that privacy BS is exactly that.....BS....like he dodges questions about her all the time and Kaia does the same, i personally have never seen celebs go that far to do that, even the ones who wanna be private. They still talk about each other. I think these shippers as I stated see themselves in Kaia,so when things are said about their relationship and lacking chemistry they take it as you saying about them and Austin...anyways I will stop ranting here but i wanted this to known and to give your blog a guy perspective

aaah welcome back in! nice to have you here. the fandom truly needs bit more guys in the fandom to balance out lol. and i think there are, but us women are a lot more vocal about it i'd say lol. and to each their own, it's so cool to have you here.

but i thank you once again for brining in the much needed male perspective on this situation. and coming from a man that is married and is Austin's age, that seriously should be everything that we need to heed your words.

i think a lot this discourse stems from the fact that the super young girls in this fandom closer to kaia's age clearly are showing that they haven't been in a serious relationship, or they don't have a lot of life experience. because a man should love his woman entirely and not be afraid to show it or talk about it. if a man hides his girl in any way then he's not happy with her. austin moves with kaia like a man that is not taking her serious. plus he knows she is too young for anything serious anyway. and when a guy TRULY thinks he has found his future wife, he won't waste time. i know this from personal family and friend experiences. i come from a parental background where my mom and dad got engaged after only 6 months of dating and they are still together 30+ years later. i know someone else where after only a week their man proposed and they are still together. like...it is what it is. a man can be just as emotional, clingy, and lovey-dovey to his woman than the woman is to him. ladies reading...if your guy doesn't act like the sun doesn't rise and set with you then he is not the one and he won't ever be. and that's okay. go find yourself a person that leaves no question as to their feelings for you. if you have to guess or question then, as the famous movie goes, he's just not that into you.

and you mentioned a verse in proverbs. i'm not necessarily a religious fanatic, however i am spiritual and i won't turn my nose up at acknowledging that stuff. . so if you would like to share the verse then go for it.

but once again, thank you so much for your insightful input!!

[aidenlyons]

A couple days after Love Day, Jake is fresh from a shower after his morning workout when his phone rings.

J: Hey, Kory. What's up, man?

K: Nothin' much. You around?

J: Yeah, got a little time, what's up?

K: Just something I need to talk to you about.. in person. Can I come over?

J: Of course.

K: Thanks, see you soon.

Jake's always happy to help out a team member, if only as someone to rant to. But this is different. Kory sounded so serious, he really hopes nothing is wrong...

When Kory gets there, Jake's out back enjoying the sunshine while finishing up a bit of reading.

J: Hey man! How's it going? Heard your party was killer.

K: Yeah, man. You should have come.

Maybe then he would have seen with his own eyes what Kory is about to tell him.

J: Nah, man, you know me. Parties aren't really my scene.

Plus he's trying to respect Aiden's decision. He hasn't reached out so he assumes he'd rather not see him. Especially in his own home. On Love Day. A part of him didn't want to see Aiden at a party like that, either.

J: What's up? You wanted to talk. Is it about the party? Girl trouble or something?

It wouldn't be the first time one of his teammates came to ask him relationship advice. They're pretty tight, especially with a lot of them living in the same dorm.

K: Yeah, right. As if. Look at me, I get plenty of tail. No problems here. No, I'm not here to talk about my love life, but yours.

J: Mine?

Jake hasn't HAD a love life since starting University. He's just been focusing on school work and football and... ok. Maybe pining a bit.

K: Man, don't be so dense. You know your ex lives under the same roof as me.

J: I know that, Kory. Trust me. What's your point?

K: Just think you might want to get used to seeing him around.

Jake would hope, but the tone Kory is using says Aiden won't be around for him.

J: Just spit it out, Kory, you obviously have something to say.

K: I just.. think you should know he's not carrying the same torch you are. Elias went up to see him during the party and, well...

K: I didn't see Eli until the next morning and I know what the walk of shame looks like. They weren't playing patty-cake, you know?

Jake does know. And it hurts to hear, he can't lie. Elias, of all people.

Aiden said that they were just friends, but maybe... no. If there's one thing Jake knows down to his bones, it's that Aiden is loyal.

J: .. yeah. Well. It's been over six months, Kory. Aiden is single. He's allowed to date - or sleep with - whoever he wants.

K: Man, how are you so calm?

J: I expected this, at some point. I hate that it's Elias, of course I do, but they're friends. It makes sense. When he left, Aiden told me he didn't want me to wait. I knew that meant this might be permanent.

J: Why did you even come to tell me this, Kory? What were you expecting? For me to get pissed, or jealous?

Kory is feeling more than a little exasperated.

K: Maybe I just want you to move on! Stop carrying a torch for a guy who doesn't feel the same. Maybe never did.

J: Listen up. You don't know shit about me, or him, or our relationship. There is not a doubt in my mind about what we shared. You have NO IDEA what Aiden has been through.

If Kory wanted Jake to get angry, he got his wish, but not for the reason he expected.

J: This hurts like hell, every day because I loved Aiden. Still do. But I NEVER doubted he loved me too. I know what it must look like, him breaking up with me. 'Cause you don't know shit about him. This is what he needs. It's BECAUSE I love him, that I respect it.

J: Maybe you should stop sticking your nose in other people's business and focus on your own life.

K: Man, you are a damned fool. You just got blinders on. If you believe all that shit, why haven't you dated? They'd be all over you. Men, women, take your pick.

J: Because I'm not over him!! I don't WANT anyone else! Not everyone is the same. I need more time before I can even think about that. I'm focusing on school, football. MY dreams. You know what? Just leave. I don't need any more of your 'help'.

Kory has nothing more to say. As he walks away, Jake tries to calm himself. He's been doing well, but it hurts all over again. He had hoped that maybe he and Aiden might get back together, but... maybe that was a false hope? Maybe Aiden has truly moved on?

[weabooweedwitch]

I dunno I kinda get the vibe that you also view your mom as a defective loser who can't change? you don't really have any nice things to say about her and seem to hate her about as much as you hate yourself (not to say that your mom isn't a pain and immature as fuck to boot bc she absolutely is). you call her subhuman and an idiot and all these horrible things a lot, before I thought it was just harsh online venting of your deepest most private thoughts but I guess you say that stuff to her irl too? just from seeing those texts, I feel bad because I know you're going thru a lot and you're hurting I don't want to make it worse but I kinda had to agree with the verbal aggression and suicide threats comment. not defending your mom, she is a pain-in-the-ass womanchild, but I can kind of understand why she's so defensive and reactive if that really is the way you speak to her. I'm sorry I know that's probably not what you want to hear or the most validating thing, your feelings are absolutely valid too here and I understand how grating having that type of parent can be, as someone who has a similar-but-maybe-not-as-bad situation over here

btw, as I understand it personality disorders are actually very responsive to therapy. the only reason people with certain disorders like aspd and npd don't get better is because a lot of them don't view themselves as having a problem or view their life problems as mostly other people's fault and don't want to hear the negative criticism. bpd has a very good prognosis too for those that recognize a need to change their behavior.

I mean, ultimately yes, i am real shitty to her off and on, but my opinion I guess is that, the temper and the insults are something that developed over time and is specific to our specific relationship. Like my mom and I have always kind of butted heads, but me being, I guess openly malicious towards her is a development that came about within the last few years, or decade maybe, just progressing over time

It's sort of like, you know, one of the things I hate the most is having to repeat myself because someone wasn't listening the first time, and with my mom, we just have the same issues over and over again that are never resolved, or I keep seeing weird behaviors in her, or she makes decisions that I find literally nonsensical. And its just. I look at her and I see someone still making all the same mistakes she always has, and it makes me angry because, I mean, my entire childhood was fucking ruined from constantly moving and literally being trapped in cars with her while she ranted. My relationship with extended family was ruined just because she had personal grudges that I kinda lowkey think are also her fault tbh. I got moved away from my grandmother because my mom was randomly like "oh I can't find any jobs in Missouri, let's just move 8 hours away to Wisconsin" and she didn't regret it but like, my older sister was completely devastated, and by that age, I myself was so desensitized to the constant instability that I was like "well yeah I don't mind moving again, we switch schools almost every single year or sometimes twice a year, do you really expect me to have any friends to even miss"

Like this developed over time. I didn't always feel this way about her. But as I've grown up, I've changed and she hasn't. She's still the exact same person. Even my father says she is literally the exact same person. It's like the thing with her moving my hairbrush out of the shower and never putting it back. I had to tell her over and over to stop even taking it out, that it's literally just a fucking hairbrush, stop taking it out of the shower where I keep it amd not putting it back and also it quite literally wasn't in her way in any way whatsoever, and she kept doing it, and there's only so many times you can "hey mom please don't do this" "mom please just put it back ok literally just put it back after you remove it" "ok I've asked you repeatedly can you stop touching my fucking hairbrush i need in the shower" until you snap and say "alright you STUPID CUNT if you do this one more time I'll remove YOUR things from the shower and I'll take them straight out to the dumpster" and THAT got her to finally stop

Like it's literally gotten to "you don't listen to me when I'm nice so why should I even waste my emotional energy pretending to be nice to you when i don't think you deserve it". "Why should I act nice to you when I feel so massively unsupported and drained and exploited by you"

Like she quite literally doesn't fucking listen, TO ANYONE. You can communicate clear as day with her and she'll still do whatever the fuck she wants. In the past my sister stopped even letting us into her apartment because my mom would start TOUCHING THINGS every single time we were there, like literally opening her fucking cabinets and touching her dishes and unloading her dishwasher, until my sister was basically screaming at her to stop and then it's "ugh Emily is so hysterical she doesn't take her medicine" like no you fucking dumbass you won't let her have agency over her own belongings in her own apartment after she moved out to literally run away from you and you're still doing it to her as an adult and she'll just look at how extremely upset you are "ugh I was just trying to help 🙄 you should think about how I FEEL"

She pushes and pushes and pushes and then when you snap and lose your patience with her, she goes straight for your fucking throat and acts like everything is your fault and she's just the blameless fucking saint. Sometimes I wonder if she is even capable of giving legitimate apologies because any time you bring anything up with her, no matter how valid you are, no matter how upset you are, she just Always responds with "im sorry but *laundry list of excuses*" or "no that's not what happened. You exaggerate. You need to be medicated." Or the favorite, classical deflection she always uses of "well what about when YOU--"

She will tell you every single day the exact same suggestion that you have already said no to. I was literally growing up in school and she'd constantly say "oh you're so smart, you could be a doctor" until I was telling her over and over "I DONT WANT TO and you make STRESSED OUT because it feels like you're trying to force me". Jesus fucking christ for example it literally makes my goddamn blood BOIL absolutely fucking BOIL that she still says "you should put highlights in your hair" when I've been telling her MY ENTIRE LIFE I DON'T WANT TO, I DONT WANT TO DYE MY HAIR, I DON'T WANT CHEMICALS AND BLEACHES, and she literally STILL SAYS IT like it's this kind of thing that makes me go "what would actually make you listen, fucking beating you like your ex husband? Are all these 'abusive relationships' you cry about and told us about when we were inappropriately young to try and squeeze sympathy out of us just you pushing people until they swing on you"

Like. I'm 26 years old and I feel like my own mother doesn't even try to understand me and i feel like if you asked her a list of personal questions about me that she'd gst most of them wrong. And I also feel like, and have felt like for a long time, that, well I guess to outright be cruel, the biggest reason she had kids was because literally no one liked her and i guess she thought children would have some sort of indentured love to her. She won't even like acknowledge i was an accidental pregnancy, she just deflects and says "no you're my miracle baby bc after I had you I found out I had endo-" "ok but mom you were not actively trying to be pregnant and you didn't like my father by the time I was born can you just at least say I was I unplanned, I'm not even saying it as you hating me, can you just acknowledge I was an unplanned pregnancy" "no :)"

I get absolutely no closure with her. Like. This might seem like an extreme comparison but the other day I was watching bodycam footage for the arrest of Joey McVay, a 10 year old who shot his mom. The story is all "oh his mom shot him because he got mad when he was asked to do chores" but then they dug a little deeper and asked the grandmother and the story was "oh this kid had a disability and his mom was actually a rude slob who worked him like a horse while also still treating him as defiant and incompetent and stupid and even being physically abusive and his house was a borderline dilapidated shack and he snapped and shot her because she made him feel literally worthless" and I was watching that thinking, wow that could have been me.

It's the constant like dehumanization she has pushed upon me while also expecting me to listen to her rant and rant and rant for years about her own problems. 'Sympathy for me but not for thee' kinda shit. I can't keep pouring from an empty cup bro? I can't give sympathy that's no longer there because it was sucked out of me like some kind of energy vampire

Ok but like exactly as I'm typing this my mom woke up and I mentioned to her how I'm trying to book with a dermatologist bc I'm having hair thinning and nail denting and I didn't want to be on the phone so I start trying to Google online, and then I end that topic and switch to , bringing up to her this personality disorder conversation, and she literally fucking interrupts me in the middle of my sentence "do you want me to make the call for you" and I just broke down sobbing because I'm sitting here reopening all my emotional wounds to write this post about how unheard I am and, there she goes doing it again, and now I'm refusing to speak to her because like, you didn't let me speak the first time, why should I waste my time saying it all again 🙃

I dont know. I guess it sounds mean but at this point she does it to herself. I've been worn down and demanded to care over and over while being ignored so now I have no sympathy. At this point its no longer "oh gosh I'm sorry that happened to you" and now it's "well what mistake did you make to fuck things up this time" which, in my defense, like, she does cause most of the problems in her life and my own. Like my god there was a period of time where we had just moved and we barely had any money I mean like financially struggling and she's like "oh I hate having all our canned goods on the floor, it just looks so GHETTO, I don't like it" and she ordered furniture off online and it. It literally. We've lived here for like two years and it still isn't fully assembled becuase she didn't read the instructions when she made it and refused to finish it without my help. Like we barely had money for rent and she wasted money on, a cabinet, because things not looking nice made her feel bad. And then in that same period of time she tried to order a dining room table that we have literally no room for, and I can't even tell you how many months ago she ordered a larger size glass enclosure for her bearded dragon and its been sitting in a box for literal months because. Uh. She expects me to help her assemble it and I told her straight up she shouldn't have even bought it if she won't even put together HER cage for HER pet which she takes poor care of, though I'm one to talk considering how little I've gotten to hold Louie

You just. Can't keep demanding sympathy and never giving it back? You can't raise your daughter constantly texting her instead of speaking to her for every little "oh I have a headache bring me a glass of water" to like the point there were periods of time she'd be lying in bed just shouting out for me instead of getting it herself and I'd barge into the room "it's just a glass of water your bedroom is literally next to the bathroom and we have neighbors, stop shouting you stupid bitch"

Like it gave me a COMPLEX. I've been sick and throwing up and refusing to take medicine and refusing any help from her because I grew up watching her pop pills for everything and argue with doctors and just constantly want help that I never saw returned the same way. She's on the couch next to me right now and she's trying to talk to me and I'm still so upset over being interrupted earlier I'm just popping earbuds in and pretending she isn't even here because the couch and her office chair are the only seats in this whole apartment which of course means she lives on it

Like maybe I could overcome my trauma and change with therapy. But mom? She'll argue with doctors. She'll argue with therapists. She'll like you and then you'll make the smallest slight against her and suddenly she wants nothing to do with you and has a laundry list of things she hates about you. She's a fair-weather mother and I'm sick of it. It's at the point where ant help or assistance or support or love she gives me almost doesn't even matter anymore because the constant mistakes and talking over me is still so constant that there's like a 70/30 hate to love ratio at this point.

I know that's a lot of text but, yeah I guess I can still keep certain disorders in mind but my mom is literally the only person I treat like this

[star2sworld]

hi, you guys…. I’m in deep need of ranting and updating my life. The last time I spoke was literally sept 20. Exactly 14 days ago.

soooo…… I spoke to my new therapist. She’s cool. She keeps it real with me. We did a body dysmorphia test and our next appointment is a month away. Actually let me go respond to her. Ok done.

my Brian literally hurts. I made a bank card, I went to Texas Roadhouse with Aria and then target afterwards, I brought a digital camera, Angel doenst sleep with me anymore, I restarted my sending addiction but I don’t speak to any of them anymore besides this guy from twt and he’s 29 but there’s family drama from my mom side where this guy and this girl saw each other secretly and they are family members and the guy is way older than the girl but she’s still pretty old as well and it’s making me rethink everything bc I’m talking to someone way older than me and we talk sexually and now I feel scared to get caught what if he exposes me he doesn’t know what I look like but I’ve sent pics of my body naked and parts of my face. & I told my sister how our uncle sa me when I was young and now she said she wants go confront him so I’m fucking stressed every time I talk to her about it she yells and me and screams in my face I fucking can’t I feel fucking empty just stressing out to the max.

No, I haven’t mediated no I haven’t journaled no I haven’t practiced self love. All this over thinking is making my head hurt. Also I stopped writing for about 25 mins but I’m back now. I was texting the guy. Decided to cut it off then I said let’s just be friends. I’m going to do a intense ab workout maybe meditate first and then I’ll go shower. Hopefully I feel better by then.

[writers-ex]

Istg i am so tense today 💀

So yesterday was Friday. Its Saturday morning here rn, btw. And some of my friends werent coming to college due to personal reasons. Now because everyone is usually busy in their work, no one has time to send the notes from the classes, so they told everyone to take the day off. Our Fridays are shorter days btw.

Being the head girl of the college, i tried to stop them cuz it might get us in trouble. But they didnt listen, so everyone was taking the day off. So i also thought that there is no reason to go to the college cuz no ones coming. So no one came, as planned.

EXCEPT ONE GIRL. She advertised the plan of not coming to college to everyone on our insta group, and then she just backed out. We thought that it was ok as long as she didnt tell anyone.

BUT THEN WHAT HAPPENED? We get a message from the teachers, saying that the parents have to tell the reason why everyone except that girl came. We panicked a bit but we all had our excuses. We decided not to message the teacher and just tell our excuses on Monday.

And thats where it all came crashing down. We just got a message, like 5 mins before the time i am writing this, that our whole class except that girl will be heavily penalized because we 'lied to our parents about the day being off' and 'breaking the college discipline code'. Btw we never lied to our parents.

Anyways, we found out that THAT GIRL SNITCHED ON US, SENT OUR CHAT'S SCREENSHOTS TO THE PRINCIPAL, AND GOT OUT OF THE PLAN LIKE SHE WAS NEVER INVOLVED. Mind you, if her parenyts had agreed to let her take the day off, she would never have come to school. And she was so unapologetic too. Like i get that we werent all innocent, but snitching and throwing everyone under the bus is so wrong 😭😭😭

I never liked that girl tbh. She fails her classes, she is not good at any extra curriculars, she is a wannabe teachers pet. And she visits the washroom 10 times a day idk why. Thats suspicious, if you ask me.

Im sorry for this long story, but i just wanted to vent out. Please pray for me and my class 😓

-🦔

this girl sounds horrible so i hope your weekend is better, i am glaring at her from my laptop and patting your back as well >:( rude little troll- please keep me posted bc this sounds…i want to know you are ok plz

side rant that happened with a girl in my class that turned out to be a cousin of mine…she so fricking ditzy giggling and making the teacher answer the most randomest questions in class while they give us lecture like bish wait or write it down BUT NO she keeps going and asking about the test and only paying attention to a lecture if its going to be on a test and not the actual INFORMATION WE NEED TO DO THE JOB LIKE BISH LIFE ISN"T ABT A GRADE????? i care abt my grade and study but like i want to perform the actual job correctly so even if the textbook is old i want to understand the idea and actually perform the task up to the standards NOT WEAR MY HEADPHONES AND LEAVE RANDOMLY FOR ABT AN HOUR OF CLASS ONLY TO BUG THE TEACHER ABT DOING THE LECTURE AGAIN BC YOU "LEFT SOMETHING IN UR CAR" why do you have to leave TEN TIMES A DAY TO UR CAR?????????????????? and then she hugs and hangs out with me like nothing happens and smells dirty like idk ur home life but shower or borrow my perfume please TTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT dont even get me started on her cheating and she has the nerve to complain abt her grades being one point less when she cheats??????????? i study and earn my grade honestly PISS OFF but i usually just smile and walk away before i punch the wall <3 bro this wednesday i was cleaning instruments during our BUSIET CLINIC EVER so i had to clean everything for eight hours straight with no help and one classmate lost a tiny screw in the sink when i left to grab some water BC I HAVEN"T DRANK WATER IN LIKE FIVE HOURS?????? so im tired, thirsty, and surviving off some milk i drank in the morning bc we don't get breaks for food either and THIS GIRL HAS THE NERVE TO LAUGH AND HUG ME SAYING THAT SHE WANTS ME TO CLEAN HER ROOM BC SHE NEEDS TO GET SMT IN HER CAR WHILE IM PANCIKING ABT LOOSING THIS SCREW THATS EXPENSIVE AND INSTRUMENTS ARE PILING (and god im so mad rn) and its all a blur after that bc i think i cried or blacked out and kept cleaning ignoring her :') i hate my life bc she thinks we're buddies and i want to slap her

whew rant over….so sorry to sound so violent this girl gets me mad and did also b4 we left class yesterday (it was friday for me) GAH