#oho nobody's having a good day here
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what's the origin story for dgdss? if you don't mind 🥺
oho! well. as it happens, i love telling this story.
if you want to know how my childhood best friend writing a short story about me ended up leading to me getting a big 5 book deal, read on.
tw for reference to self harm and some...... unpleasant commentary (not mine) about it later on, folks.
so.
i was homeschooled until my very last year of high school (yes, like mean girls, except my mean girl dominated the first 15 years of my life and that last year was just blissfully chill) and like many homeschooled children, i was a part of a co-op.
cool, right? it's like School Lite™ where you put a group of feral children in a classroom, except you're all varying ages and grade levels, and also, nobody in the room is an accredited teacher, and nobody seems to have an issue with this.
my mom and her mom were best friends, and we were born around the same time, so naturally, we were best friends too from birth, and we were part of the same co-op all through my elementary and junior high school years.
anyway. i won't air all of the dirty laundry regarding our early friendship, because the whole book deal thing doesn't touch it, and i also think there's no need to be pointing out the behaviour of an Actual Child in retrospect. all you need to know is that we were best friends, our relationship was fraught, and by the time we hit 12-13 it was to the degree that people started telling me, hey man, this is Very Strange Behaviour and You Might Be A Victim, and i had to go do some introspection.
the introspection led to the general conclusion oh shit, but we stayed friends, because obviously. when you're 13, breaking up with a best friend is literally The End of the world, and anyway, there was a lot of good in there too, right?
right?
anyway, things took a turn when we were about 14. i struggled heavily with mental illness and self harm as a closeted religious teenager (who'da thunk?) and i confided in her about a small fraction of what was going on, because she was my best friend. i didn't tell her details, because even then i knew what i was experiencing was heavier than was probably appropriate to burden another kid with (and i stand by it!), but she knew the gist.
several Tense moments resulted, one of which was the day she pointed out self harm scarring in front of other people and asked me what happened, ran away, and refused to talk further about it, so i had to talk to her mom, who told me i should apologize to her, considering my mental health struggle had been so difficult... for her.
yeah, you know the type of people we're dealing with, here.
she was determined to undermine me in front of our mutual friends. anything to make me look worse, in one way or another. anything to step just a little higher. if i was interested in something, here's a public dissertation on why it's a dumb thing to be interested in. if i had a crush, forget keeping it a secret, and forget the notion that it's normal, because it's not, it's stupid, and shallow to have a crush in the first place. if we had a similar interest, here's a dressing down about how all i ever do is steal the things she likes (even if i liked them first).
needless to say, by the time the whole deal with the short story is going down a few short years later, we're on the rocks.
let me set the scene. we hadn't seen each other in several months, due to the On The Rocks of it all, and were meeting up for coffee while our moms were also getting coffee. hashtag classic homeschooled behavior, etc.
we're catching up, and she tells me she needs to apologize for something. i am, as you might imagine, agog, considering the rarity of apologies from this girl. she tells me she wrote a short story and submitted it to her university journal to be published, and that in hindsight she thinks she should have asked for my permission first.
i am, obviously, suspicious. to her credit, she gives it to me to read through and then leaves to go do christmas shopping. it's a muddy-ish faux-deep piece about a narrator who has a best friend struggling with mental illness and self harm.
(oh, you might say. to which i say, yeeeeah.)
in the story, the narrator depicts the struggle of trying to care about somebody who is in pain, referring to the best friend as 'cariad' the whole way through, which is just so weird i'm not even going to touch on it. google it if you'd like. the line that i still remember (and will probably remember until the day i die) is the one where she describes her cariad as feeling the need to use a razor as a microphone.
i honestly don't recall what i said when she eventually came back, but i contained all of the aggression of a piece of pocket lint at the time, so i imagine it was along the lines of oh. yeah, okay. [insert image of the saddest wettest cat you've ever seen]
i never saw her again. we went our separate ways, and that was that. we never talked about it.
(the one upside of it was that my mom, with whom i have a Notoriously Contentious relationship, was outraged on my behalf. that was the first (in many years) and last (ever) time we were on the same side of a battle, so, you know. silver linings.)
but the real indignity of it to me was that my friend never really knew. i never really told her about what was happening in my head. she never knew why i was hurting myself, or how bad it got, because i did everything i could to keep that to myself, and at the end of the day, she thought it was all for attention to the degree she wrote a transparently biographical account of it and chose razor as a microphone as a phrase on purpose.
dead girls started as a way to process the complicated feelings i had about that friendship and then obviously ultimately became a whole different creature in the process. i wanted to write about how it felt to go through that never having had another close friendship to compare it to, and how confusing and nauseating it was to have other people point out shitty behaviour.
it became about healing when you can't get closure. how do you move on when you'll never know why somebody hurt you?
nothing that happens in the book is based on real life events between us, partly because i'm not a hypocrite, and partly because if your work can be traced back to your personal experiences, perhaps you should do what you can to be kind.
'my julia,' as i like to call her (she is not named julia, because, oh my god) is nothing like julia hoskins in appearance or general personality. but the way she made me feel? oh, that's all there. nora feels it the way i felt it.
i wrote dead girls back in 2020, and got agented with it in 3 weeks of sending my first query. we got a book deal for it with a penguin random house imprint 1 year later to the day, and next week it's going to be out in the world, and i'm not going to lie, it feels really damn good.
also, her short story got rejected by her university, because it was bad. so you might lose some, but you win some, too.
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(A starter for @cloudpools ! Good luck, Blythe!)
Doomsday is bored. That's not a new thing. In fact, nothing is really new around the Office anymore - not the carpet, not the walls, not the visitors, not the cars that periodically run through it, not the other ghosts, not even the monuments that have been stolen and set up outside of it.
Certainly not her boredom.
The ghost doesn't even feel like destroying anything today, because that's not a new thing either. She's put plenty of holes in the vibrantly painted walls around here. Set fire to the 90s arcade carpet plenty of times. Defenestrated the couches more times than she can count. What's the point.
It's to the point where she doesn't even feel like scaring the shit out of anybody anymore. Not really. That's lost its fun, too. Most people don't react in a way that's funny these days. They either just stand there or try to come onto her. Nobody runs away screaming or begs for their life anymore. What kind of crap is that? Boring.
Except. Oho, wait, maybe she does feel like scaring the shit out of somebody after all, because here's a new potential customer now. This one looks promising. A younger folk - they're generally more likely to scare, like little Timmy who still flinches at the sight of her at her sharp-toothed grin and glowing yellow eye sockets.
With a small snicker, Doom goes up into the ceiling, passing straight through the tiles, and begins following the visitor overhead, watching her through the barrier. She can see through walls and other solid objects. She can even see her soul, if she has one.
She follows her around quietly for a minute or two, observing her, before deciding to making her presence known. All she does is giggle. A sound that's not inherently bad... if you know where it's coming from.
She follows up this giggle by making the lights flicker and softly saying, "Who's this little soul wandering my hallways? Ehehehehehe."
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i might not have the nsft art done by tomorrow after all hghghgh things have been busy these past few days and i'm having one of those "nothing's coming out right" weeks ;;; and i really want this to look good. i can't comm anyone rn, so i /HAVE/ to step up and make this look good -- it has to last me for a good while AKJFNJJDNFKJ.
turns out i might be able to spend valentines "with ren" after all tho so. aha. oho.
(tl;dr i won't have a heart monitor for a day or two bc of a reaction to the adhesive -- they're sending me an hypoallergenic model that'll get here tomorrow or thurs, so nobody will be uh.... 'watching'..... 🤫
#of course as soon as i dropped it off for return shipping i had my first palps since i put the damn thing on. ofc ofc ofc.#in better news i'm almost at a point where i can get my carpets cleaned. aka close to new kitty time. ^_^#need... baby... neow...#📌 [ my posts. ]#💭 [ my thoughts. ]#[ suggestive. ]
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AWOL 26
(Another longer one. Lots of disagreements in this chapter, but somehow I managed to sneak in a brief, cute little exchange that I’ve been wanting to post for months. Also, I left canon a little bit more broken than I found it, again. Yay!)
It was said that the lineage of Yoda through his most recent apprentice, Yan Dooku, tended to be more reckless and foolhardy than most. Ahsoka had grown enough that she no longer bristled at that particular bit of criticism, but she still preferred to think that she, Anakin, and Master Obi-Wan had their priorities straight, because there was not much time in battle for thought to dwell on anything else but the most immediate problem.
Therefore, once she recovered from the initial wave of disbelief at finding her best friend in the company of a Sith Lord who ought to have died more than a decade ago, Ahsoka let the conundrum pass for the moment. The immediate problem was not Barriss or Maul. The immediate problem was getting off Florrum.
And the immediate obstacles to solving that problem were the several speederfuls of pirates who had caught up to them.
And getting onto the Crucible while in a live firefight.
When the Crucible was being piloted by a ten-year-old Rodian.
As a wise one once said…fierfek.
Well, at the very least, their ferocious new temporary ally was not at all afraid of returning fire…so to speak. When a blaster bolt had ricocheted perilously close to Barriss’s head just as she was having her turn drinking from the canteen, Maul had sent the speeder of the pirate responsible hurtling into the speeder behind it. Jinx gave Ahsoka precisely one wide-eyed expression of helplessness, before turning off his blue lightsaber and following suit, plucking the remaining pirates out of their seats and dropping them to tumble into Florrum’s yellow dust.
“You’re not going to win anything by sparing their useless lives, boy.”
“And you’re wasting your breath being dramatic. They’re out of range now.”
Barriss swiped a blaster bolt out of the air before it could hit Jinx’s right lekku. “Less talking, more blocking. Are we there yet?”
Ahsoka tuned out the fight, listening to the distinctive whistle of the Crucible’s ancient engine as it gradually grew nearer. “Almost.” She put her head into the tank’s hatch. “All right, everybody out! You guys are getting on first.”
“But the accelerator…”
“Lock it in place with something! We need to go!”
The Crucible pulled up beside them, smoking and squealing in ways that would have set even Anakin’s teeth on edge. The old gangplank was lowered, and Ganodi and Professor Huyang stood upon it, the young Rodian reaching out with her hands and the Force towards her friends.
And that was when the tank suddenly decelerated; whatever had been placed on the accelerator to keep it going had been displaced. Ahsoka braced, grabbing poor Byph as he lost his footing and nearly fell. The Crucible, already overtaxed in this high-speed chase for which it had not been built even in its time, careened away from them; without a good pilot at its controls, it lurched and then plummeted toward the ground. Ganodi and the Professor only had enough time to leap out of the ship before it crashed…right into a ravine which Ahsoka only just now noticed they had been approaching.
Petro disappeared into the hatch, and the brakes screeched two moments later. They came to a perilous, halting stop, mere meters from meeting the Crucible’s ultimate fate. The pirate speeders surrounded them.
“Hands up, Jedi!”
Ahsoka knew when she was beaten. She turned off her sabers, holstered them, and put her hands above her head. Almost everyone else did the same…except, of course…
“That means you, Zabrak!”
The Sith held his hands primly behind his back, though he did spare the speaker one ferocious glare. “I am not a Jedi.”
“Maul,” Barriss hissed.
“Put. Your hands. UP!”
He lifted his eyebrows, and then tilted one ear to the sky. “Like…so?” He flicked his wrists, and flipped the three speeders over, toppling everyone still in them to the ground.
The pirates swore and tried to right themselves, but before they could get reorganized, a heavy weight descended toward them. A heavy, beat-up freighter landed thunderously between the pirates and the commandeered tank, its large cargo bay doors opened wide.
“Everybody inside!”
“Oh, you have got to be kidding,” Ahsoka breathed, even as she fished Petro out of the pilot seat.
“Have you got any better ideas?” Jinx yelled, before he leaped off the tank to retrieve Ganodi and the Professor.
…He was right. There was no choice, here. It was either this, or let the pirates capture them again, them and all the younglings.
Ahsoka ran up behind the children, helping Barriss toss Zatt, Katooni, and Petro up into Byph, Merrin, and Gungi’s waiting hands. Then, she jumped into the cargo bay, and caught Barriss’s hand to lift her up; Maul hauled the Professor inside a second later, Barriss caught Ganodi when Jinx wildly tossed her, and Ahsoka barely managed to drag Jinx himself aboard before they were taking off, the blaster bolts still flying around their heads as the doors finally closed. Then, for a moment, all was still as everyone fought to catch their breath.
“Best. Training mission. Ever,” Gungi growled at long last.
“What he said,” Byph returned in his own language.
When she got home, Ahsoka was going to buy Obi-Wan a good keg of his favorite tea. If this was the sort of headache he had to deal with all the time around her and Anakin, the man was a living, breathing saint and deserved three dozen vacations at the least.
***
“Um…brother?” Savage murmured as they left Florrum’s atmosphere.
Maul rolled his eyes, and began to input calculations for a hyperspace jump. “I know, I know. Just…get us out of here for now.”
Savage sighed. “No, I don’t mean them.” He took Maul’s hand, and pointed out of the bridge window. “That.”
His younger brother’s jaw dropped as he saw what Savage had noticed on the sensors…that being the entire flotilla of Confederate ships which had dropped out of hyperspace in front of them scant seconds before. “…What?”
“That’s Grievous’s flagship,” Savage said…oh, and that was a person he’d hoped never to cross again, but here they were. “What did you do?”
“I…I don’t know…”
“It wasn’t him,” intoned one of Maul’s new acquisitions, a Togruta, who entered the control room, staring at the ships outside with an expert gaze. “The Ohnaka Gang has been at odds with Dooku for some time now. Obviously Dooku has sent his main enforcer to deal with them.”
“Oh,” Savage grunted, swiveling around to the controls in order to direct their ship out of the flotilla’s path. “Well, never let it be said that I stood in the way of General Grievous…”
“You’re just going to run away?” the girl demanded.
Savage was pretty sure he and Maul made the same bewildered gesture before they turned back toward her. “Was Ohnaka not about to sell you to Dooku?” Maul asked. “Why in the name of every star are you defending that mongrel?”
There was an obstinate light in the young Jedi’s eyes. “That mongrel is the only thing in this sector that doesn’t belong to the Confederacy. His raids have disrupted their supply chain far more than we’ve been able to manage. Like it or not, he’s necessary if anyone is going to depose Dooku.”
She was careful to avoid mentioning the Jedi or the Republic, and addressed her argument chiefly to Savage in a tacit appeal to his presumed desire for revenge against his erstwhile Master. “That is an excellent point,” Savage replied, holding up a hand when Maul, confused, began to lose his temper. “And, if I was in any other situation aside from this, I’d give my left hand for the chance to ruin Count Dooku’s day. But, I’m not the only factor here. We are getting away, end of discussion.”
“But…”
“You heard him,” Maul murmured. “Go back to your younglings, Padawan.”
She sneered, and stamped all the way back to the cargo bay where her fellows were waiting.
Savage grinned. “Man, you’re better at adopting strays than I am.”
“…Shut up.”
“…We’re going back to Yavin? But the pirates found us there…”
“The pirates are about to be far too busy to care about where we’ve gone. It’s as good a hiding place as any.”
***
…There was a Hutt-sized bedframe welded to the cargo bay floor, with a fully-attached mattress to boot. Barriss was currently occupied with gathering a great many blankets, comforters, and pillows, which had been scattered about the room with all of the recent activity; the younglings shrugged, and set about helping her with the task.
Ahsoka watched quietly, feeling as if her life was spinning out of control and she couldn’t even manage to decide how to react to it. Florrum is being invaded by Separatists, she signed, dully.
Good.
She glared at Jinx. Obi-Wan did not spend the last two years cultivating a rapport with Hondo Ohnaka for us to lose him as an ally. This could turn the war against us.
Master Kenobi is still in the neighborhood. If he wants to keep Ohnaka there, he has the numbers to liberate him, if the wily old rodder does not liberate himself first. The Twi’lek eyed her shrewdly. But that isn’t the real reason you’re angry, is it?
She huffed. I’m not angry, I’m frustrated. We just wasted two years of progress…
No, Ohnaka wasted two years of progress when he decided to throw friendly relations with the Jedi out the window to grab at some shiny crystals. We made a choice to survive, and we did.
For how long? Force save us…you weren’t here to see the results of Savage Opress’s last rampage, but I was. He killed one of my crèchemates, his Master, and their entire division of clones…
Yes, I know. I watched the HUD footage to get a feel for what I was getting into. At Ahsoka’s horrified face, Jinx averted his eyes and shrugged. I’ll admit it didn’t really put my mind in a good place. But, that battle was months ago, and to be honest, he didn’t look well in those holos. He was too still, too robotic, and his pupils were…I dunno, wonky, too much dilated for the amount of daylight he was in. I think it’s safe to say he was not his own person then, under some kind of mind control. And…well, look at him now.
The giant Zabrak had lumbered into the room, and gingerly bent to pick up a soft blanket patterned with cartoon tookas. Zatt crept up to him, gesturing to the blanket.
“I can take that over to the bed if you want.”
Opress peered down, barely able to see the young Nautolan over the expanse of his own massive chest. “Uh…no, I…” he stammered, gently lifting the blanket out of the youngling’s grasp. “This is, uh…mine.”
Zatt stared solemnly back at him, and reached up to pat his elbow. “That’s valid, my dude.”
Jinx turned back to Ahsoka, raising his eyebrows meaningfully. See what I mean?
She frowned. Barriss obviously got to him.
And? She’s good at mind healing, overworked or not. And, they don’t seem to have any love for Dooku…
Jinx. Please tell me you aren’t seriously suggesting what I think you are?
He regarded her frankly. We have no choice but to watch and wait, right now. If we can turn this into an alliance of some sort…you have to admit, it would give the Order options we didn’t have before.
You are…!
Ahsoka, tell me straight. If these two had shown up on Wasskah instead of Chewbacca, what would you have done?
She closed her eyes, and set her jaw. I would have united with them against a common enemy.
Even if the rest of us thought you were crazy.
She sighed. I don’t think you’re crazy.
Of course you don’t, because you’re crazy. I’m just trying to keep up, here. Jinx smiled. We can always try to run away once we land. The kids’ commlinks still work, and Master Kenobi knows we’re out here somewhere. And we’re pretty good at this surviving thing, you and I.
I hope we can be good enough…
***
Hondo Ohnaka sat enthroned amongst the ruins of his own hideout, observing quietly as Obi-Wan and Cody approached him. He was stone-cold sober, his chin high and his back straight; that alone told the Jedi that he was greatly affected by the losses he had suffered.
“Well, General,” the Weequay said with a smile. “I suppose now is as good a time as any to discuss my fee.”
“Your fee?” Obi-Wan replied, holding back a smirk as Cody deliberately adjusted the gigantic repeater he was carrying on one hip. “Beg pardon, Captain, but as it was my army that liberated your assets, I believe I am the one getting paid in this scenario.”
“Ah, but you only helped me because my business is useful to your war efforts…don’t lie, I’ve been around to know how the game works.” Hondo sniffed theatrically, slouching. “Our ledger is settled on that account, but there is still the matter of the effort I spent protecting your young Jedi-in-training.”
Obi-Wan kept smiling, even as the gears of his brain came grinding to a halt. “To which young Jedi do you refer?”
“Why, your teenage grand-apprentice, of course! I rescued her from one of my more irritating competitors who were going to sell her to Dooku of all people, along with some Twi’lek kid she was with…Syndulla, I think his name was. And then, of course, I found another girl named Offee; two of my men (whom I’ve now promoted to captains) snatched her out of the jaws of some monster and brought her back here!”
“…Do tell,” Obi-Wan said, forcing his body language to exude calmness instead of his steadily rising hackles. “Well, where are they? They’ve all been sorely missed back on Coruscant.”
Hondo laughed nervously. “That’s the thing…they, uh, went their separate way after the attack on my compound.”
Obi-Wan’s eyelid twitched, and he heard Cody shift the intimidating weapon to hold it in his arms like a baby, sliding one step closer to combat mode. “So what you’re telling me is that you had our young Jedi, and not only did you not immediately inform us that they were with you…”
“You’re a hard man to contact, Kenobi, have a heart!”
“…you also extended the same hospitality to them that General Skywalker, Count Dooku, and I received upon our first stay with your organization.”
“Absolutely not. I’m smart enough not to make the same mistake twice, my friend, give me just a little credit!”
“Not only that, but you had them in your possession, and then you lost them? And you expect me to pay you for that?”
“There were extenuating circumstances, and I can assist you in finding them!”
“Oh really? Tell me, where do you think they went?”
The pirate captain cringed just a little, trying to play it off as a shrug. “They, uh, neglected to inform me of that.”
“Meaning they escaped.”
“No, meaning they were stolen, by two new recruits who took advantage of my generosity and my excellent benefit plan.”
Obi-Wan was beginning to seriously regret the choice to leave Anakin on Coruscant and Lissarkh on the ship; this man needed to be strangled or eaten, one of the two, possibly both at the same time, and he couldn’t manage to stomach doing either himself. “Can you at least describe the reprobates in question?”
“Uh…well, they were both Dathomirian. One was this little girl, maybe twelve years old, adorable, and she could talk to the disturbingly friendly ghosts we had staying in our diner. The other was her father, a man kind of yay-high, red skin, yellow eyes…”
He was going to have a stroke. He was certain of it. “You allowed Darth Maul to walk away with my teenage apprentice!?”
“No, I allowed Malign, touchingly protective single father of Ilyana, to walk away with your teenage apprentice. I’m not an idiot, Kenobi – that Maul fellow was in pieces and had a, uh, distinguished Core accent like you do. This guy was whole and spoke like a normal person…I mean, normal for out here, not…”
“Did this ‘single father’ have a red lightsaber?”
“How in the galaxy would I know? I was fashionably indisposed when the fighting broke out!” Hondo was shrinking into his chair. “Are you…angry? I don’t think I’ve ever seen you…”
Obi-Wan waved him silent and turned his back on him, so that only Cody could see the several long breaths he took through his nostrils and let out through his mouth in order to avoid doing something regrettable in a fit of temper.
“Easy, sir,” the Commander murmured.
“I should have let Grievous kill him.”
“And let that asthmatic cyborg have all the fun? Sir, I thought you loved me.”
Obi-Wan grinned, and turned back to Hondo with what he assumed was an expression of tactfully withheld bloodthirst. “Captain, your fee is settled. For your effort in…protecting our future Jedi, I will order my colleague here not to gun you down like the…unrepentant gentleman of fortune you are.”
Hondo glanced in terror at Cody, who sighed disappointedly and shifted the repeater onto his hip again.
“You will also refrain from interfering in any Jedi effort again, for the duration of the war…my fellow generals are going to be less forgiving than I am.”
“Of course, Kenobi, anything you say.” The pirate captain nodded shakily. “All of my resources are at your disposal as well.”
“What resources?”
“…Want a drink?”
“I have my own, personal, very well-stocked bar on my own, personal, not currently on-fire or discombobulated ship. Keep your drugged and watered-down spotchka. I bid you good day.” And with that, Obi-Wan turned on his heel and marched out of the compound.
“…You know, sir, we could always bombard them from orbit,” Cody said at his shoulder.
“I’m in a mood to admit I’d like that, Commander, but I’d have a devil of a time justifying such a waste of tibanna gas to the Council.” Obi-Wan sighed. “He’s going to be scrambling to regain my good graces now. That, at least, will ensure his good behavior for…a standard month, perhaps. He might even find the young ones for us.”
“Then we can shoot him.”
“Indeed.”
#star wars#the clone wars#canon divergence#AWOL au#ahsoka tano#darth maul#maul#barriss offee#jinx syndulla#savage opress#the Youngling Clan#plus merrin feral and the prof in the background#obi-wan kenobi#hondo ohnaka#commander cody#oho nobody's having a good day here#except maybe nilam and qui-gon#pretty sure they're hyped up on Space Ghost Booze#and bitching to each other about their respective children#Ahsoka is just looking for any reasonable excuse not to share an enclosed space with her ancestral enemy#Hondo is not a reasonable excuse#Zatt is a good Nightbrother Wrangler#return of Savage's favorite tooka blanket#Hondo shut up challenge#Obi-Wan is going to blow a gasket#it's kind of beautiful in a terrifying way#the 212th waits in eager anticipation for their general to lose his temper#more cyborgs to dogpile that way#Cody is just kind of watching this and feeling privileged to witness such an historic moment#just you wait until Luminara and Lissarkh hear about this...
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Dad!Gojo with schoolkid!reader hc
Summary: Dad!Gojo with a Reader that goes to school. Or more like: DILF!Gojo being hit on by people
Characters: Gojo and his kiddo
Word count: -
Content warning: Gojo himself is a warning, idc
A/N: I think this is part 2??? 3?? I don’t even know.
He does not pack your lunches, in case you were wondering if he did. Man's too busy eating his own sweets.
Imagine him doing it tho??? Devastation.
If he has time to pack your lunches, which is rare, he packs some pastries.
He actually packed your lunch once upon a time (when you were in kindergarten) but one day you had insisted that you were "all grown up" now (going to elementary lmfao) and could do it yourself, so he was like "Oho?? Is that so?" and stopped
gives you lunch money tho. Is 50 dollars enough?
regularly brings you to school (in casual wear), then is late to his own class or whatever he has to do??? (assuming he has indoor lessons at all)
He usually doesn't drive. He simply picks you up and uses cursed energy to transport. Because he can.
but when he does drive, rest assured that it will be in a fancy car bc he can afford it
If he is not able to bring you to school, he will have Ijichi do it
everyone thinks Ijichi is your less cool uncle
Occasionally Nanamin brings you to school
all the kids think your dad is super cool
They admire him: boys want to be like him later on, girls want to have a husband like him when they grow up but little, do they know both of you live dangerously
that one time when your homeroom teacher tried to sneak her number into your backpack for your dad after having seen him a few times
the dozen times when single moms flirted with him in front of the school gates and he flaunts his good looks but ends up being like "I am terribly sorry, ma'am, but I am a very busy man with a kid to take care of."
someone call the doctor(s) because: cue a VERY charming smile follows afterwards
crouches down to give you a goodbye hug <3 "I'll see you later, my little sunshine"
Honestly, I don't see anyone bullying you or picking on you. I wrote it in the last chapter in case people would be curious but you're literally Gojo's kid that probably adopted some of his traits and this man is just loveable and so are you. Sorry, I don't make the rules here.
In case you do get bullied or picked on: God forbid the first-years-trio hears of this. They'd pull up the very next day to make sure nobody picks on you ever again. Sorry not sorry.
Gojo isn't exactly thrilled about someone picking on you either, so he's gonna have a mature talk with their parent(s)
To Gojo, the most important thing is that he has a heart-to-heart talk with you afterwards to be able to assess what damage has been done to you, mentally as well as physically, and reassure you that you are a great person that should live their life with their head held high
If you're crying? Lord, help this man. He doesn't really know what to do besides suppressing his murder intent kneeling down to embrace you tightly and stroke your head
If he catches the other kid in the act of bullying you, he will pull you aside, throw them a look and make some sassy remark that will instantly shut them up
He has a mission? Oh well, guess Nanami will have to work overtime then because Gojo will make some time for you and spoil you afterwards to make you forget all the bad things
You are a prodigy in the eyes of the teachers
You are doing especially well in maths - already being able to multiply and divide bigger numbers
Sometimes Gojo explains stuff to you at home, so it's hardly surprising that you are able to do this
He takes your education very serious - just because he's a jujutsu sorcerer does not mean you have to become one as well... unless you want it, which is also why he sometimes teaches you basics about the world he operates in
Whereas he may take it seriously, that doesn't mean he will scold you for bad grades. He will just encourage you to do better. Not that you brought back a bad grade anyway
You may be good at maths but you enjoy arts lesson the most
lmao doodle your dad with a mustache, your dad fighting a curse (but ofc nobody knows what that is), Shoko and you enjoying a campfire, Megumi carrying you, etc
At the end of a day, he will pick you up again if he can (again, in casual wear)
You will run into his arms as soon as you see him in front of the classroom
Effortlessly, he picks you up and twirls you around
"How was your day, sweetie?" and you proceed to tell him
He listens well and throws in some comments or questions
What you do afterwards depends on his schedule
He would take you on non-special-grade missions too because he knows he is able to protect you for sure but he prefers to spare your children's eyes
so you just go home
#gojo x reader#dad!gojo#gojo satoru x reader#gojo satoru headcanons#gojo as dad#jujutsu kaisen#jujutsu headcanons#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jjk x reader#ikemen gojo
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“do you even lift, bro?”
Not exactly a prompt but just a suggestion where the dorm leaders fem s!o wants to carry them bridal style? Maybe they got injured or maybe she just wanted to show her strength? How will everyone react? Thanks a lot :) -- From @blackstrawberrynightmare.
A/N: Thank you so much for this! This was a very fun break from the “holding the world” series ahahah~ I enjoyed it a lot and I think it sort of became crack? I hope this makes everyone who reads it laugh at least once! Please tell me what you think~
other versions: ver i (this), ver ii (dire, divus, ashton), ver iii (leech twins, jamil, epel, rook, lilia)
--
“Bet I could bench press you.”
“I beg your pardon?” Riddle turned to you with the most incredulous face ever, and you giggled in response. “What is... a bench press?” Riddle struggled, his expression looked as if he was thinking back onto all your conversations--he tried to remember if you’ve ever mentioned this... bench press before.
“It’s basically when I hold you like this” you opened your palms facing upright, “and then I lift you like this--” you proceeded to move your hands up and down.
“Absolutely not.”
“But Riddle!” you pouted, and he narrowed his eyes in turn, his arms crossed.
“I refuse to be... bench pressed.” He pressed his lips tight together, and you sighed, disappointed.
“One day I’ll convince you.”
“That day will never come.”
“Then next time, I won’t ask for permission.”
“You--” Riddle glared, his cheeks red. “--never mind.” he scoffed, as he looked away. “What makes you think you can carry me anyways?”
“Ah, but I can!”
“I don’t believe it.” Unfortunately for Riddle, you were waiting for something like that.
“Then let me prove my strength~”
“What are you doing? Why are you bending down--Wait, don’t you dare--guh!”
You proceeded to wrap your arms behind his knees, and around his back. With barely a blink, you swept him up into your arms.
Riddle gaped when you barely flinched. While Riddle was small, he wasn’t exactly light. Or at least, that’s what he liked to think. You looked down at him, and wiggled your eyebrows.
“Have I made you fall in love, prince of my heart?” You delighted in the embarrassed red flush on his cheeks. He began to struggle in your arms, but you held on pretty tight--enough that the most he could do was attempt to push you away with his hands.
“Let me down,” his brow furrowed, and from embarrassed red he slowly turned to angry red, “this instant.”
“No way, this is too fun.” you giggled, as he struggled harder in response.
“If you don’t I’ll--” he stopped short, realizing he really didn’t have leverage against you. He couldn’t exactly use his unique magic on you. You grinned cheekily at him, and he crossed his arms grumpily in response. “... Since when were you so strong anyways?”
“Always?”
“You didn’t say anything.” he pointed out and you cocked your head to the side in thought.
“I guess it’s like you with your magic. You’ve always had it, you’ve always been good at it.” you shrugged, “it’s normal to me. So I never thought it was something that needed explaining?” He sighed in response, he could understand your point after all.
“... When will you let me down?”
“Never.” you cuddled close and his blush that had originally calmed down--intensified.
“--!” he sighed, before he let you. It should be fine as long as nobody walked in.
“Prefect, Riddle--” Cater walked in, only for his eyes to widen, and his hand snapped up immediately to take a photo.
“Cater!” Riddle looked murderous, and he tried to leap out of your arms to grab the third year who laughed nervously, and hesitantly stepped back. “[Name]! Let go of me right now!”
“Sorry, can’t do Riddle,” you giggled. “Cater! Send me that photo, okay~?”
“[Name]!”
“There’s a reason I adore you Prefect!” Cater laughed, as he snapped more photos.
“What’s going on?” Trey ducked into the room, and paused at the sight. Riddle sputtered, as Trey immediately turned around to snicker.
“Cater I want those photos too--”
“YOU ALL--!”
--
“Leona!” you tried to call the man’s attention, but he only turned away, his tail thumped heavily on the ground.
“No.”
“But you need to get to class!” you protested, “don’t you have a super important thing today?”
“Hngh... zzz...”
“Hey! Don’t you dare fall asleep on me!” The lack of a response made your eye twitch. “Fine... if that’s what you’re gonna do--then I’ll have to resort to--”
When there was a sudden silence, Leona smirked, the moment you approached him--he would drag you down to the ground with him, and quiet you down by--
That is until he felt your small, delicate hands dig underneath his back then legs and within a moment--he hissed in surprise, and you smirked in response--you carried him in your arms, bridal style.
“-carrying you.” You snickered at him. “how do you like it, Leona?”
You’ve never seen him so surprised. His eyes were wide, his pupils huge (’like a cat’s!’ you couldn’t help but inwardly squeal), his ears were flattened against his head, his tail was actually still--and from the little of it that you could see of it--it seemed like the fur was standing upright too.
‘One day,’ you solemnly swore to yourself, ‘I’ll surprise him by, I dunno--bench pressing him with one hand so I can take a photo with the other hand.’
Leona just stared at you, his mouth slightly agape.
Sure, Afterglow Savanna was filled with incredibly strong women. However no one has ever attempted to carry Leona. Primarily because he wouldn’t let anyone--and also because his pride wouldn’t let him. He knew that women outside of Afterglow Savanna weren’t the same as the women within the kingdom. So he had figured you wouldn’t be able to carry him...
Give him a moment, his pride was just damaged, in the same moment you’ve suddenly become all the more attractive to him.
‘In the culture of his kingdom, especially for the royal family--what made a great wife, is a strong woman. Here you were, proving just how perfect you were for him.’ He could feel the heat rise to his face upon that realization, and he struggled to calm his heart down--fervently hoping that nothing showed on his face.
“Hello? Leona?” He was still super still in your arms, and you shrugged. “Ah well, since you aren’t resisting, this will be easier for me.” So you began to carry him out of the garden. At your sudden movement, he twitched in your arms, and tried to get off. Unfortunately for him, being able to lift a man of his height and weight also meant that you had a pretty strong grip.
“Nope.” you shook your head. “You wouldn’t get up earlier, so I’ll just carry you to class.”
“Let me go He-” he paused, ‘Could he still call you herbivore, given you’ve proven you’re not a herbivore?’
At his sudden, uncharacteristic hesitance, you glanced down at him. Wow, he’s being really weird today.
“Leona... are you okay?” He opened his mouth to respond, when his ears twitched, and he struggled harder in your arms.
“He--[Name], put me down, right now.” he practically hissed.
“What? No way! You’re clearly not enjoying this, therefore I am.” ‘Hah! Take that for all the heartbeats I wasted on you, you big tease!’ He growled in response, about to snap back when--
“Is that... Leona?” You blinked, head turned in the direction of the voice, while Leona slackened in your arms, and groaned. “with [Name] carrying him? Shishishi!”
“Oh! Hi Ruggie~ Jack~ I’m off to bring your dorm leader to his class~”
Ruggie was practically bent forward, as he both cried and laughed. Meanwhile Jack just stared at you with the widest eyes, and biggest open mouth you’ve seen on him.
“Hahahah! Leona--being carried like a bride! Wait I need a photo!” Ruggie snickered as he pulled out his phone.
“Oi! Ruggie! Don’t you dare--!”
“Oho, I see you’re a hyena of culture Ruggie! How do you want me to pose?”
“Well if you can just--”
“You herbi-[Name]--don’t encourage him!” Leona yelled, clearly exasperated. At the corner of his eye, he noticed that Jack’s shoulders were shaking. The student had desperately covered his mouth--trying to hide his own laugh.
‘Great,’ he scowled. ‘they’ll never let me live this down.’
--
“You’re doing great Azul!” Jamil yelled, with a very wide, self-satisfied smirk on his face as the trembling octopus merman flew into the air on his broom. Azul would’ve shaken his fist at the snake if he wasn’t clinging onto the broom as hard as he was. ‘Is he that mad about the burn cure incident in our alchemy class?’ Azul thought, but the broom wobbled and his grip tightened on it in response.
“Unbelievable these land dwellers,” Azul cursed underneath his breath. “I just learnt how to walk on two legs last school year and now they want me to fly? They want a merman in the air? Absurd. Complete savages the lot of them.”
Now when it came to magic—the most important thing is being able to believe in your ability to do it. Be it believing in your ability to manipulate elements, or believing in your ability to conjure something out of thin air.
This applied to flying too.
Unfortunately for the octopus... he was so distracted as he cursed in the language of the seas—he forgot about the fact he was flying.
Hence his broom started to wobble.
He only realized the problem when his broom started to jerk around.
“Oh—“ he let out more curses in his native language and closed his eyes, “ok you can do this Azul. I believe I can fly! I believe I can fly—“
But he didn’t really so—his broom grew to be even crazier with his movements.
“Hey! Azul! Open your eyes! Calm down!” Jamil yelled out. Caught up in his own panic, Azul didn’t hear him.
“I believe I can flyIbelieveIcanflyIbelieveIcanfly--” Azul chanted, but when he opened his eyes and saw how high he was--
“Ah carp, I’m gonNA DIE!” Azul shrieked, and shut his eyes tight--which led to him getting flung off his broom.
“Oh scarab.” Jamil swore as he tried to run after the free falling octopus, only to stumble to a stop when he saw--
“Gotcha!”
One moment he was free falling, then the next moment he’s caught, and pressed close to your chest. Azul’s eyes flew open in response to hearing your voice. You looked down at him with a wide smile.
You were carrying him--like a bride. Your hold was gentle, but firm--and the smile you sent him was tinted with worry--but it turned to amusement with the way he gaped at you.
Azul’s eyes glistened, and you’re pretty sure he would start crying any second now if you didn’t immediately distract him. You didn’t want him to be sad after all.
“You rang for a Princess Charming?~” you tossed in a wink, and he promptly turned red in response.
“You--ga--wha--” Azul gaped at the fact you carried him in your arms with ease.
“[Surname]!” you looked up to see that the rest of Azul’s second year class had ran up to you too. You easily hiked Azul up in your arms (which he yelped at), as you stood upright. Ashton Vargas looked at you with glitter in his eyes, and you took an involuntary step back at his expression.
“That! WAS! IMPRESSIVE!” Professor Vargas boomed, “That catch was magnificent! You barely stumbled! No recoil at all!”
“I’m really strong.” You said with a shrug of your shoulders. “I never really had a problem with doing physical stuff. I just braced myself properly to catch Azul.” you held out your arms, where the octopus, still completely bewildered, lay--still slack from the shock.
“Since when could you do that, [Surname]?”
“I always could...?” you shrugged your shoulders in response. “I just never needed to use it.” you laughed awkwardly.
“Is Ashengrotto alright?” Vargas looked at the merman, and tried to look at his expression.
“I think I should take him to the infirmary.” you said, “he’s still in shock.”
“Right, right. You do that.” Vargas stroked his beard. “Carry on. I’ll have Viper update Ashengrotto if he misses out on anything.” Jamil flinched, and shot a guilty glance at Azul then at you. You shot him a smile, in response and mouthed that you’d tell Azul he was sorry. Jamil looked relieved.
“Sure Professor.” with that you turned around, and relaxed your hold on Azul.
“...How’d you know?”
“Hm?”
“... That I didn’t want to be seen... like that.”
“You mean crying?” You gave him a love filled smile that made his heart beat even faster. “Well the answer is simple. I am your girlfriend after all.” His face turned red again.
“Thank you.” Azul sighed, “I feel like you saved me twice today.”
“And I’ll keep saving you whenever you need me.” That gentle grin--full of your adoration for him is enough for his blush to darken.
“Please put me down.”
“Oh no, I refuse.” you squeezed. “I think you’re cute in my arms~”
“I want my octopus pot right now.”
Extra:
“Oh my.”
“Carp.” Azul swore, as he saw the Leech twins up ahead. Floyd let out a happy gasp, before he ran right over.
“Ooooh! I want to be carried too--!”
“Wait Floyd--don’t just jump--AH!”
“Oh my, my.” Jade snickered to himself as you easily caught Floyd, but started to stumble.
“Jade!” wailed Azul from underneath the laughing Floyd.
“Woah! Shrimpy strong!”
“Don’t move too much! Ah! Wait! My balance--”
--
As you entered the Scarabia Dorms to visit Kalim, you noticed a commotion. More specifically--a bunch of animals going wild. You also quickly noticed Jamil off to the side, hissing out sharp commands.
You ran up to him, and waited for him to acknowledge you. Which he does, easily enough.
“Ah, Prefect, you’re here.” he had a long suffering expression on his face, and you tilted your head.
“Someone forgot to lock up all the animals this morning so...” he sighed. “We’re trying to calm them down.”
“Ah, I see.” you looked around, “any way I can help?”
“You don’t have to, please sit with Kalim.” he gestured to an empty chair. Something in your stare must’ve been telling, because he visibly paled and went:
“He... he’s not there.... is he?” he said in a very weak and pitiful tone.
“No he’s not.” you said, as gently as possible. “Would you like me to help?”
“Yes please.”
“Alright.” you slammed your fist against your open palms. “He’s likely wherever it’s most difficult.” Jamil nodded, before he made a very deadpanned expression.
‘Ah.’
“... He’s with the elephants.” you both said in unison, and you both rushed off in the direction.
--
You find him easy.
There he was, in the middle of the path, faced away from the approaching elephants.
“Jamil! [Name]!” he waved--WAVED! All cheeky too! While in the midst of danger. Jamil looked like he was having a heart attack, so you quickly darted to Kalim.
“Wait! [Name]!” you quickly scooped Kalim up into your arms, bridal style, before you tossed yourself as hard as you could out of the fray. You exhaled in relief, before you feel Kalim wrap his arms around your neck, to give you a quick kiss on the cheek.
“My hero!” he laughed, all jovial, as if he hadn’t nearly been in mortal danger.
“Kalim! That was dangerous!”
“Yeah but we got out of it alright!” he said, as he waved his hand in a dismissive manner. “What’s more important is--! I didn’t realize how strong you were!” When he looked at you with those sparkly eyes, it was easy to falter, and forget about everything that could you upset.
The adrenaline finally rushed out of you, and you crashed to your knees, after which you buried your head into the crook of his neck.
“[N-Name]?” his voice was confused, and even flustered. Any other time, you would be eager to see his expression, but for now--
“Please... be more careful next time.”
“.... Uhn... I’m sorry! I’ll try not to make you worry so much!” Kalim pulled away from you to look at your face. “What kind of boyfriend will I be if I make you hurt like that, yeah?”
You exhaled, relieved. “Yes, exactly.”
You both share a smile, then soft giggles--before it turned into full blown laughter.
That is until--
“What do you think you were doing Kalim?” Jamil hissed, his expression dark.
“Oh--well, that is” Kalim sweated in response, and you attempted to melt into the background until Jamil’s dark gaze moved to you.
“And you as well--” he gritted his teeth, “running out like that--!”
“Wait--why are you blaming me?”
“You both nearly gave me a heart attack!” when he looked up, his eyes glowed with a sinister light.
“Oh no.”
“...[Name]... save me.”
“Already on it.” you hopped onto your feet, and darted off with Jamil hot on your heels.
“Come back here you two!”
--
Now, normally when people were surrounding your ridiculously pretty boyfriend you were fine with it. He was a model after all. You didn’t really mind him interacting with his fans--you were perfectly fine with stepping out of the way, and giving them a few minutes to talk to Vil.
You could relate.
After all, you didn’t call yourself Vil’s number one fan for nothing.
You were lucky enough to be able to hoard Vil to yourself so much, so you were always willing to share ‘Vil the model’ with his fans.
‘It’s fine. I’m completely fine.’ you crossed your arms. You hoped your face wasn’t irritated, or upset. You understood how important fan interactions are but--
‘It’s our first date in awhile, and I really wanted to enjoy private time with Vil.’ you thought mournfully, as you eyed the gaggle of boys and girls who surrounded your Vil.
If Vil was upset--it wasn’t visible on his face at all. In fact, as per usual, he enjoyed his time with his fans. (Which made you feel even worse.) He made sure to acknowledge each one of them, and looked them straight in the eye. It caused a lot of the fans to go red, and nearly faint (once more, absolutely relatable--those eyes? With those lashes? Up close? Even you had difficulty breathing with him that close.)
You looked at the time, only to inhale sharply at the fact he’s been at it for at least an hour. Plus--based on the way the crowd around him only grew, you two would never get to finish your date.
‘Alright, I’m sorry,’ you thought, ‘but I’m going to have to get in the way.’
When Vil looked up to search for you outside the crowd, he couldn’t see you. He mentally frowned. He was grateful that you were always willing to adjust to his fans, but at times--he wouldn’t mind if you were a little bit more selfish with him.
He had given you himself--he as Vil Schoenheit. The world--his fans--they might have Vil Schoenheit as the influencer and model--but you had him, for himself. The Vil with no make up in the morning, the Vil who would cheat his diet for some sweets, the Vil who wasn’t as put together as the world saw. You saw all his flaws--the imperfections, the things he found ugly--yet you held him, told him he was your world despite that.
That was something.
No, it is something.
He hoped you knew, that no matter what, that made you so irreplaceable... so important to him.
After all, beyond his prowess as a poisoner, beyond his fame as a model--who would stand by him when that was all gone?
He hoped it was you.
“Sorry everyone, but I’ll have to steal my boyfriend away now.”
He turned to you, surprised but excited that you were going to steal him away.
‘Now how would you do that, sweet potato?’
He saw you bend down, then quite literally--sweep him off his feet. He’s surprised--and his first reaction is to wrap his arms around your neck. You ignored the gasp of fans, as you quickly run off without a single misstep.
“I finally have you, my ah... damsel in distress?” you quirked your brow, not sure if you said it right. Vil only laughed and pressed his lips against your cheek. When he pulls back, there’s a very obvious lipstick mark on your cheek.
“You finally saved me, my Princess Charming.” he said, and you blinked down at him.
“I was just... selfish.”
Oh! And how much did that warm his heart--to know how much you wanted to dominate his time, as much as he did.
“You can always be selfish with me.” He told you quietly, with a gentle smile.
“I mean--are you sure?”
“Of course! I am your boyfriend after all!” He cocked his head to the side, “now, you didn’t tell me you were strong enough to carry me around.”
“It never came up?”
“Then, I’ll rely on you to save me more--alright?”
You stared into his eyes--honest, and loving, coupled with how genuinely enchanting Vil was well--you broke away first with a faint blush on your cheeks.
“... Of course...”
EXTRA:
“How cute...” Rook purred.
“Aside from how weird it is that we’re following them on their date...” Epel paused. “I wonder if [Name] would tell me how she got so strong?”
--
You burst into Idia’s room, frantic and worried after receiving a text from Ortho, about his brother collapsing.
“[Name]!” Ortho called out relieved, as he pointed out Idia--slumped onto the ground, groaning.
“What happened Ortho?” you frowned, as you knelt, and carefully turned your boyfriend onto his back.
“He just suddenly collapsed, and I don’t know why.” Ortho fretted, you leant forward and pressed your forehead against his, only for you to reel back quickly in surprise.
“I think he’s running a fever.” you frowned, “we’ll have to take him to the infirmary.”
“But how?”
“I’ll carry him, of course.” Ortho’s mouth dropped in surprise when you easily scooped up his brother. With Idia’s long hair trailing to the ground and limp body, it did look like you had just finished saving a princess.
“Woah! [Name] you look so cool!” Ortho stared up at you with shining eyes, and you giggled in response.
“Thanks Ortho. Now go run ahead and tell the nurse I’m bringing your irresponsible brother to the office, alright?”
“Mhm!”
--
On the walk there, Idia stirred in your arms.
“Oh, are you finally awake?” you teased, at which his eyes widened and he immediately froze in your arms.
“[Name]?” he squeaked out, then frantically looked around before he met your gaze again. “Wait--are you carrying me?”
“To the nurse’s office, yes” you said, amused.
“Please put me down!”
“Absolutely not, after all--you made Ortho and I worry a lot!” you huffed at him, “so suffer in the arms of your girlfriend a little longer!”
“Everyone is staring!” he whimpered.
“Well if a certain someone didn’t forget to take care of themselves while they got into the new dlc for Gao Gao Shield and Sword...” Idia whined in response.
“I needed to complete the GaoDex before anyone else! I was one Gao Gao away from completing it, before this upstart mystery player LilV actually managed to beat me--” he buried his face in his palms. “I was so close...”
“There there.” you tried to rub his back as best as you could. “Isn’t there another dlc still coming out later this year?” He brightened up at that.
“That’s right, I’ll start training my resistance to hunger and--” he winced at the glare you shoot at him.
“If you’re going to do it, do it in a healthy manner Idia.” you frowned, “if not for me--then for Ortho.”
He paused, as he lowered the hands covering his face to stare at your face. You were genuinely worried for his sake, and he thought: ‘oh no, this is like picking the wrong choice in Water Crest: Seven Dorms and my support level is going down!’ he inwardly panicked, ‘I worked pretty hard to grind to level S! Of course I need to maintain it because I--’ he felt his face flush red. ‘because I really like [Name]... and I don’t want her to worry so--’
“I’ll... I’ll be more careful.” he looked away, bashful, and you stared at him--surprised. You didn’t think it would be easy--he loved gaming. You wouldn’t want him to change--only to take care of himself more.
So now that he was saying this then--
‘I’ll meet him halfway.’ you decided.
“Next time I’ll stay with you.” you said, with a sweet smile. “so if you get caught up in it, I’ll get you back on track.”
“Are you sure? You might get bored?”
“Now why would I get bored?” you shoot him a sly smile, “I’m spending time with my boyfriend after all~”
“...”
“Ah! Idia you’re heating up!”
“That’s because--! Ughh--! I didn’t realize there was an SS support conversation!”
“A what?”
--
“So are your horns heavy?”
Malleus cocked his head at your sudden question.
“I’m... confused... with this question, bright light.”
“Eh...” you move your hands around as you spoke, “I don’t know, I guess I was just curious if your horns... like maybe had a certain weight to them? Like... does your neck hurt?” you tilted your head. “Like... does it feel like when you’re holding a staff? Maybe?” You paused as you looked back at the dark fae.
“Sorry, was that a weird question? Is it... intrusive? Or something?”
“No it is not.” he shook his head gently. “I suppose I can not really tell. I have had my horns all my life so I can not say if they are light or heavy.”
“Could I try--like seeing if they’re heavy?” He quirked his brow in response.
“You can try,” he paused, “but how exactly will you do that, bright light?”
“Like this.” With barely a blink, you gestured for him to crouch lower. He did so--confused. When you suddenly picked Malleus up into your arms, you do so with such a smoothness that he froze.
“Huh, your horns are slightly heavy I think.” You adjusted him in your arms, you definitely felt a difference in weight closer to the side where his horns were. “Tsunotarou? Bright eyes? Two hundred and two centimeters? Malmal? Are you okay?”
(You were unaware of Sebek behind you, who had attempted to rush out to save his young lord. Lilia pulled him back with one hand, his other hand covered his guffaw. On his other side, Silver was very awake--also surprised that a human girl was able to just sweep the young lord into you arms with barely a flinch or stagger.)
You squinted at him, only to realize his pupils were wide--wider than you’ve ever seen before. His lips were parted slightly, as he stared at you. He looked absolutely stunned.
“Um? Are you okay--”
“Heh...” Malleus raised a hand to his lips, before he started laughing out loud.
“Woah Malmal, you look sort of... crazy.”
“Heheh... Hahahah!” Malleus laughed, “Interesting! So very fascinating, my bright light.”
“Uh?”
“To think you would have the gall to lift the Heir to the Valley of Thorns--to think you had the strength to do so--will you ever stop being so intriguing, my bright light?”
“I’ll try not too?” you replied, in a confused tone, and Malleus continued to chuckle lightly in your arms. His eyes became gentle at your response.
‘I keep wondering why I find you so fascinating...’ he mused, ‘but it is truly simple--you are not afraid to treat me as... myself I suppose. You did not see me as Heir of the Valley of Thrones--you saw me as a man with horns-- a man with bright eyes--’
‘You do not treat me as delicate... but at the same time, you do not treat me as something to be feared.’
‘You are like a light... a light with the potential to burn away all the darkness...’ he held your confused gaze, ‘will you do it? Bright light? Will you persevere in this world not yours--and show it how bright you can be?’
‘Whether you do or not--you are perhaps, the only one, the first one I can consider a friend--an equal.’
“You look really deep in thought, bright eyes.” You said, and he hummed.
“It is nothing.” When you moved to let him down, Malleus’s arms looped its way around your neck.
“Ah?”
“I would like to stay in your arms for a little longer, bright light.” He met your gaze, and you blushed at the intensity in those eyes. “Would you indulge me?”
“--That is... of course, Tsunotaro.” His smile widened, and your heart melted at how genuinely happy it was. To think he used to gaze at the world with such sadness...
If little things like this was enough to make him happy, then you want to do it more often.
--
Ai’s Glossary For TWST Swear Words *I primarily came up with this because I don’t think swear words are the same in different worlds--? So I decided I should just come up with them. (✧≖‿ゝ≖)
- “Oh my Queen” / “Sweet Witch” / “Dear Sorcerer” ... you get the drill - basically equivalent to our “oh my god”, “sweet lord”, “dear god”
- “Oh carp” - unique to the Octavinelle dorm. It’s basically “oh crap” or “oh shit.” Variation include “holy carp.”
- “Oh scarab” - unique to the Scarabia dorm. Perhaps specifically unique to Jamil too. It’s the same as above, except he uses scarab instead of carp.
#aiwrites#aiscenarios#ai lift series#twisted wonderland#female reader#twst#twst scenarios#twst riddle#twst leona#twst azul#twst kalim#twst vil#twst idia#twst malleus#ayt lets bench press tsunderes#the key to writing leona is to pretend you're holding a cat#will i ever stop trying to imply that the octakids and mc are in a poly? never#im sorry jamil i owe you a cute one shot#vil is so hard to write#the whole pomefiore is difficult to write and isnt it fascinating? we only see them at 'face value'#idia breaks the 4th wall sorta#malleus is lonely
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OMG 1000 is a big number cONGRATULATIONS ! mmmM i was thinking, maybe yandere!scarabia & octavinelle with a genie! s/o ? they have the lamp like in aladdin :o
warnings: general yandere content, implied violence (in floyd’s part)
kalim al-asim
there’s been tales of genies in lamps for years in the land hot sands- there’s plenty of myths and stories he grew up hearing. of course, the chance of actually finding such an artifact were slim, nearing to impossible
so stumbling into a lamp and accidentally unleashing a genie was needless to say, a huge shock. of course, with his happy and cheery attitude, he didn’t waste any time in befriending the genie- honestly, his three wishes are pushed to the back of his mind
at first, he’s eager to show this genie the outside world. how long has it been since they saw the world? have they ever been in a huge feast? kalim says he wants to show them the world- although it’s quite clear to everyone else he’s enjoying their company a bit too much
a human courting a genie is just... unheard of. kalim’s genie is confused, but oh, he’s so sweet! they really can’t sense any dark intentions from him; and he doesn’t, really. the twisted love that blooms in his heart isn’t a bad intention, it’s simply how he loves
kalim takes full advantage of the fact his darling has been stuck to his side since they were awakened, even without he himself realizing it. they trust him; his affection seems to be so pure they can’t help but return it, he’s gifting them jewelry and silk despite them being the genie, he doesn’t even mention his wishes...
... which is how it’s just so easy to be slowly entrapped by him. oh, genies are cunning and smart: genies are supposed to outsmart greedy humans, to twist their wishes around and make them suffer by their own words. but kalim isn’t greedy, he isn’t one of those slimy creeps who try to use a genie to cheat and win at life... and so his gentle and cheery demeanor is what it takes to slowly isolate and drive his darling into a corner
when they realize what he’s doing- keeping their lamp away from them, keeping them quite literally locked in like some sort of housepet- they panic. they should be in control here. they have to give him his wishes so they can leave. but nothing can compare to the look of hurt in kalim’s face when his genie finally tells him to just go and make his wishes
“if i make three wishes, won’t you leave...? i don’t want you to leave.” kalim is serious when he says this. he doesn’t care what he could wish for (he has wealth, he has friends, he’s happy). all he wants is them. he wants them, he wants to love them; he’s become hopelessly attached
it’s a tricky situation. kalim’s hidden their lamp god knows where, claiming it’s “to keep it safe”, he’s blocked off all escape routes, and they’re technically still his, he is their master until all his wishes are completed. he keeps acting as if nothing’s weird- he almost treats them as if they were just a human lover, happily talking about the future he’ll share with them
there’s still hope, right...? kalim’s genie can only hold onto the hope that as years pass, greed will corrupt the heir and he’ll give in and cash in his wishes, and that’ll free them. of course he won’t, he isn’t the sort of person who’d do that- they... know him well enough now, to be able to know he’s just not the kind of man who’d be so easily swayed.
perhaps it’s better this way. they’re not human, but kalim seems to be trying to ignore that. if they press too much- if they try to tell him it’s just not how things should be, genies aren’t supposed to be kept around like this- it’s not going to accomplish anything. kalim may be gentle, but he’s possessive. if anything, they might get him to use up one single wish; and he’ll wish for them to stay with him forever, as his lover for the rest of his life.
jamil viper
like kalim, he’s grown up hearing stories about genies in lamps found in the land of hot sands. he also knows how cunning and sharp genies are in the stories; how wishes are turned around, how they make it so someone’s dearest wish backfires
so of course, when he accidentally unleashes a genie when cleaning what he thought was just an oil lamp forgotten in a corner of the treasury, jamil knows better than to immediately give in to his impulse of using his wishes
jamil may even taunt the genie- do they think he’s just going to foolishly make a wish and let them twist his own words against him? he also relishes on how the genie refers to him as a master; it’s... truly a nice change for once
he’s quite shocked that the genie isn’t like those described in myths. they aren’t an old or ghostly looking figure; especially once they’re entirely out of the lamp, they actually look just like any other human. if it weren’t for the slightly outdated jewelry, they wouldn’t look too out of place... they’re quite pretty, really...
jamil tells himself he’s keeping them around because he wants to “think out his wishes properly”. and it is true, he wants to make sure his three wishes are all perfect, but... he cannot deny how nice it is to have someone who’s objectively his. he is the superior here, he’s the master
is it... can he be in love with a genie? they do look so human; they’re so cute with how they try to pressure him into making his wishes, all the while trying to be respectful to their master. he adores how they squirm when he threatens to lock away or destroy their lamp if they keep telling him to hurry and make his wishes, how they’re always so grateful when he brings them food despite them not needing it
finally, jamil has his wishes done. it takes months of pondering; they have to be perfectly worded, he can’t have his darling little genie tricking him, can he? boiled down, his wishes are quite simple: he wants the viper family to be released from servitude to the al-asim family, he wants to be powerful and independent in the future, and...
oh, and he wants to own them and keep them by his side forever. he makes it quite clear- they’re going to be his lover, they’ll be nice and obedient, and do as he acts. after all, he’ll make sure to remember them that he’s still their master; not being allowed to leave despite the wishes being done, being kept in his room as some sort of housepet
azul ashengrotto
a genie in a lamp, a nearly divine creature who can grant any wish... when he was younger, that would have been azul’s dearest wish; however, now that he’s older, he takes more pride in the fact he got where he is with his own work
so finding a magic lamp all of a sudden is... jarring. he’s long past the days he’d wish for a genie or some divine intervention to make his wishes come true, to not be mocked or bullied; so when he’s asked to make three wishes... he doesn’t know
instead, he sees an opportunity. not only are genies a rare find, but this particular genie is just so beautiful; he’s careful with his words. while he thinks of his wishes, won’t they stick around? perhaps help around the lounge? it would be quite an unique experience, wouldn’t it?
he keeps the lamp locked away, trying to distract them from the fact. he’s advertising their appearance, flaunting the “real genie working in the lounge”, showing them off in the clothes and jewelry they came with when they came out the lamp
it’s easy for azul to become obsessed with them. they can grant any wish to anyone, but they’re his, he controls them now. If he has them, nobody else does. It’s his business to make deals to make people’s wishes come true- it wouldn’t be good for him to let them go, right...?
his smooth talking is good enough to be able to make requests and convince them to do as he pleases without it quite counting as a wish. it flusters and stresses them out, but to azul, he doesn’t mind
he becomes possessive over them; to the point he’ll attempt to use ‘it’s a deal’ on their ability to grant wishes. they don’t need that; they have him!
he doesn’t want them to be able to go, to be able to leave him. his wanting to keep them around for business reasons slowly becomes him craving their attention and approval. he’ll only ever use one wish: they cannot leave him, ever.
jade leech
oho, a genie? what a curious happenstance. jade seems to take the situation with his usual calm and tempered attitude
perhaps he’s so gentlemanly and perfect, that when the genie first looks at him, there’s no way for them to imagine the way this gentle-faced man will make things go
at first, jade acts innocent. so they’re a genie? how interesting- so they can grant wishes? oh, three wishes then? what are the terms? the conditions? of course he already knows the answers- myths and stories about genies are common- but it’s clear it’s working. he can tell the genie seems to be happy to explain, maybe even charmed by his ‘naivety’
jade plays his cards slowly. he’ll figure out what his genie knows and doesn’t, how long they’ve been stuck inside the lamp; oh, it must have been so lonely there! he takes his time acting like the sweetest gentleman to them, lowering their guard
and then he makes his first wish
they aren’t allowed to leave or disobey him, ever
the panic is almost immediate when he says this. he’s been a perfect gentleman, a kind master- so why now does he make this wish all of a sudden-?
once he’s made sure that he’s got them where he wants them, jade indulges in his lover. yes, they’re his lover now; it’s not like they have much choice
if they disobey, then he has no trouble shoving them back into the lamp- perhaps he’ll do so when he can’t keep his eye on them, taunting them and making them suffer
they’ve gotten so used to being around jade, of living in the world, being left back in the lamp is suddenly jarring. it’s so lonely, so cold; even though they should be furious at him, they cannot help but suddenly feel calm when he lets them out, when they’re in another being’s presence once again, even if it’s the man forcing them to play the part of his lover
floyd leech
waaah, what’s this? a genie? why’re they hiding in a lamp, like a hermit crab? that’s quite funny, isn’t it?
floyd’s first instinct is to just squish ‘em in a hug. little hermit crab is just sooo cute! why were they hiding in there, all alone?
when a very flustered genie explains they’re actually supposed to grant him three wishes and not, uh, be hugged around, floyd isn’t particularly surprised
three wishes, huh? hmm, sounds interesting
he’ll blow his first two wishes in random, useless things. maybe he’ll wish to run into riddle just to tease him, or maybe he’ll wish the cafeteria will serve his favourite food
... but he doesn’t want to make his last wish
floyd doesn’t stop hugging and being handsy with his genie- or as he calls them, his hermit crab- he can’t let go of them! they’re the perfect little plaything!
and suddenly he just refuses to make the last wish and let them go. they try to ask nicely; doesn’t he have another wish? he can ask for anything, they’ll make it come true!
and suddenly floyd holds them by the neck, eyes darkened- why do they want to leave him so badly? why does his hermit crab want to disappear from his life? don’t they know once he makes his third wish they’ll be gone? do they think he’ll let them?
floyd can be violent in impulse, and it’s clear that they have to tread carefully. trying to press him into making another wish, into freedom, is a ticket to having their ribs painfully crushed in his embrace
stuck as his plaything- a powerful genie, capable of making any wish come true- except the wish for their own wish of freedom
#yandere twst#yandere twisted wonderland#kalim al asim#jamil viper#azul ashengrotto#jade leech#floyd leech#yandere tw
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Get your crush || Choi Yeonjun
Summary: y/n and or nameless character happens to have things happening to her in a way that seems like a dream. The things happened seemed like they were in her imagination, cause why would her popular known crush notice her, but oh they’re a reality.
Word count: around 1.3k
A/N: This is my first time posting on tumblr so bare with me, though it’s not my first time writing. I have a couple of stories on ‘wattpad’ and i thought “why not post some of my quick story ideas to tumblr?” so here we are after a long ass debate with myself. also, the mention of ‘she’ is just to give out the idea that there’s an extra person but they don’t have much relation to the story and i got lazy with coming up with names (hence why the reader is y/n) but lets not talk about that. I hope you enjoy my stories :)
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"I'll quickly go get it then i'll head out" I told myself after debating whether or not I should go back to class to get my pencil case. At first I got lazy cause I got plenty of pens and pencils back at home, but after I remembered my favorite pens being in my pencil case, I headed back to get it. As I got to the classroom I heard voices in there so I peeked to see who's in there. And to my displeasure 'she' was there with none other than 'Yeonjun' with her. Let's just say that I have developed a liking towards the boy for sometime now, but that's a story for some other time. She was known as one of the bad kids whom you shouldn't hang out with. As for her name ... It doesn't really matter here anyways; but all I know is that Yeonjun and her have a project together. Yeonjun on the other hand, was an amazing person. He was smart, hardworking, sporty (strong ;)) and nice but never a push over. If you don't like him, then you must be jealous of him, its one of the two. And I... Well I study hard, do my best and I mind my own business. She sat there writing down on some paper with her cigarette between her lips, with no care in the world. As if its not allowed to smoke in school. is she even real? She let out a puff bothering Yeonjun, so took away the cigarette from her with distress and irritation written all over his face. For a second, I thought he was going to smoke, but eventually he threw the item on the floor and stepped on it to turn it off. She simply eyed him then continued on with her work. Yeonjun looked up at the slightly opened door which made me jump and stumble backwards "I guess I'll just come back later" I quickly got up and rushed away. 3rd P.O.V : Yeonjun got up from working on this unpleasant project to see what happened to the person who was behind the door. Once he opened it fully, nobody was there. Confused, yeonjun went back to his seat shaking his head to shrug away the idea that a ghost might be there and continued focusing on working so he can finish his parts of the project faster. *end of 3rd P.O.V* My week went on at a very routinely pace. Go to school, have classes after classes, go back home, do work, sleep and repeat. I ended my weekend hoping that next week would be slightly different and hopefully feel lighter.
--- As I watched the teacher give the lecture absent mindedly, boredom was slowly taking over me, I can only hear my thoughts and my quiet breathing. Class ended with us assigned to do even more work, so I got straight to it. I looked up from my work because of some noise and chatter. I saw yeonjun standing there with his hands in his pockets and a small smile adoring his features. My heart did a little thing and I had to look away.
ugh if only i can have small conversations with him between classes... i can only dream.
My peace was soon ruined as one of the witches sitting a couple desks away, decided to throw shade at me. I looked up at her, raised my eyebrow clearly irritated but she dismissed my expression and continued on. "Stop starring at him weirdo, he won't like you" she remarked as she laughed with her friends. I took in a deep breath as I ignored her once more. And honestly it was embarrassing that she said that while he's here.
I know i sometimes stare at him but not for too long cause i don’t want to be a creep.
"Pretending to not hear me loser? Yeah you're silent cause you know I was right" "hey stop it!" The whole class went dead silent once his voice was heard. why is he standing up for me? no he’s quite literally standing up. I stood up to go out of the room put got stopped mid way.
I turned around to see yeonjun behind me holding my wrist. Though his grip was quite firm, it was still gentle. nooo i don’t have time to get butterflies now!
My eyes went from starring at his hand on my wrist to his face. I had confusion written all over my face.
"Oho, I didn't think you'd have such a taste in women, boring ugly weeb-" stepping forward, my hand grabbed her hair, pulling her head and smacking it against the table; with a loud smack, she fell to the ground whining in pain. Everything happened too quickly and I just moved subconsciously. ooohh i’m gonna get in trouble for this.
"That was the last straw, mess around with someone else b" I huffed and sat back down on my chair, 'she' came in and looked at me up and down then looked at yeonjun. She chuckled then went to her seat. For days after that, nothing remarkable happened, other than the few laughs and words that get thrown at me, but nothing big.
----
It’s finally the weekend! and right now, i’m at one of my favorite parks. it’s not as known, so it’s always quiet .
I was standing at the railing on the small bridge, looking down at the water. This place always calms me down but its a bit dangerous as it gets slippery so you have to be careful.
3rd P.O.V: yeonjun was walking around breathing in the beautiful air, taking in the scenery. As he walked by the lake, he saw a familiar person, he sensed their familiar presence too. He looked at her from a distance. Her hair waving around because of the wind as she looked around with the softest smile on her face.
She leaned forward to touch the water but it was a bit far from her touch, she then looked up at the tree that had flowers growing on it. She reached forward to grab one but still it was a bit far from her reach, so eventually yeonjun walked over to her so he can help her get one of the flowers of the tree. but a step away from her, she got frustrated and stomped on the ground.
She reached farther and as she was about to grab the flower she slipped falling into the water, and in no time yeonjun was right behind her. Luckly she didn't fully get into the water cause she held onto the bottom of the rail. She let out a scream of fear cause she wasn't any good at swimming. Yeonjun came from behind her wrapping his arm around her waist and slowly pulling her with him to the side. At first she flinched as a small gasp escaped her mouth, soon after she recognized yeonjun she felt her body relax. "Hold on to my shoulders, so I can swim with both arms to get to the side faster" she carefully did as he told her but she was shaky cause she was somewhat afriad of drowning "its OK don't worry!" Yeonjun kept on reassuring her constantly until they safely arrived.
They sat there heavily breathing, trying to calm down and realize what happened. she couldn’t believe what was happening! is she dreaming?!
Yeonjun chuckled "this is interesting .... Are you OK?" He turned to her, eyes sparkling with a little smile on his face. She blushed "y-yes, i-im fine" she stuttered a bit, mentally cursing at herself for this, but she liked him too much to not be affected. "T-thank you for helping me, I was afraid I'd drown" she mumbled while fiddling with her fingers.
He was able to hear her despite how quietly she spoke "Don't mention it... Though you'll most likely not drown cause its not as deep as it seems" he leaned closer to her nearly making her stop breathing "oh.. I didn't k-know that" with a slight confused face she looked down again.
He noticed how she was acting, he found her very cute, so he decided to tell her "Relax, I like you too!" He softly stated. Her head snapped to the side looking at him with wide eyes and her mouth slightly open, he let out a hearty laugh that sounded heavenly to her "a-are you serious?" She asked in disbelief "a hundred percent!" She felt her heart about to burst as she couldn't get any redder. is this really happening?!!!!! her thoughts were a mess.
He leaned closer and kissed her cheek, she laughed in shock, but what surprised him is that she happily and boldly returned it making him blush.
They were one unique couple. But they were happy to be together. Their differences made them closer and their likenesses connected them further. The end
P.S his outfit for the weekend that i imagined had this shirt on but imagine it with black hair instead. if that happened i would just e v a p o r a t e
#txt#txt yeonjun#yeonjun#txt soobin#soobin#txt beomgyu#beomgyu#txt taehyun#taehyun#txt huening kai#huening kai#choi yeonjun#choi soobin#choi beomgyu#kang taehyun#hueningkai#txt scenario#txt scenarios#txt imagines#yeonjun scenarios#kpop#tomorrow by together#tomorrow x together
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90 Days, part 5
Thomas Hewitt x reader
* Updates on Thursdays *
Day 25
You had a new book (well, newish, courtesy of Thomas) open on your lap, but you kept reading the same paragraph over and over. You couldn’t focus. Things had been - not awkward, exactly, more like… charged, between the two of you since your stroll the other day. You gaze wistfully at the bluebonnets on the small table, which were beginning to wilt. He’d stopped spending any extra time in your room, even to read; he just hung around long enough for you to eat, and he was a ball of nerves the whole time. You figured you’d spooked him with the hand-holding and he needed some time to relax again, which is why you’re surprised when, a few hours before dinnertime, your door begins to open.
It doesn’t register as odd that no one had knocked until Hoyt steps over the threshold, and the hairs on the back of your neck stand on end instantly. His tone starts out light, but that doesn’t fool you.
“Well, lookit you, all curled up an’ content like a housecat. Too bad this ain’t your house,” he ends in a scowl, then takes a step closer. You practically throw the book to the ground and jump to your feet, unwilling to be caught in a disadvantageous position.
“Get the fuck away from me, you malicious piece of trash,” you growl, tone immediately dripping venom, leaping forward to block him from getting any further into the room. He stops, but the smirk on his face doesn’t falter.
“Oho, here come the claws,” he says, returning to a darkly playful tone for a second, before dropping it suddenly in favor of guttural ferocity, “I owe you some hurt, you little shit, and there’s nobody home to save you,” he finishes, and slams the door closed behind him.
Your blood turns to ice as he stares you down, leaning closer by the second. You’d befriended the most obviously dangerous person in the vicinity, and perhaps dropped your guard because of it - forgetting the person most likely to be dangerous. Was it true that the house was empty? You didn’t have a weapon and he was blocking the only exit, so if you couldn’t call for help either, your options were looking fairly dire.
Well, fine - if he wanted claws, you’d give them to him. Your fight or flight instinct is kicking in, and you have nowhere to run - so you lunge at him instead.
Despite being caught off guard and pushed backwards, he catches the fist you throw towards his face. So instead you turn, lower your shoulder, and ram him into the door. It rattles on its hinges and his breath leaves him in a whoosh. You back up a step and grab the front of his shirt with both hands, intending to slam him backwards again.
“Let’s see what else of yours I can break,” you growl, but before you can make another move, he throws a wide-armed swing that doesn’t quite connect, but does knock you away from him and toward the nearby wall. He follows up quickly, pouncing on you and shoving you back against the wall.
Before he can get a good grip on you, you stumble to your right and into the little table, which falls over with a bang. The vase shatters on the floor, sending water flying.
You only have a split second to lament the flowers before one of his hands abruptly grabs onto your face; you bite him, hard, and he yanks the hand away with a roar. You lash out with one arm, catching him in the side of the head, but the blow mostly glances off - and the opening it creates allows him to strike out with his other hand and grab you by the throat. He wastes no time in leveraging his grip to slam you back against the wall, quickly caging you in with his body while your head spins.
Then the door flings open, threatening to come completely off its hinges. Both of you whip your heads in that direction, panting, and the bruising grip on your throat loosens.
Time slows to a crawl as you watch Thomas’ face; the shock first becomes confusion, then fear, then rage. You don’t even have a chance to sigh in relief at his appearance before he’s across the threshold and yanking his uncle off you, practically sending him flying across the room. He doesn’t stop there, either - he’s on him again in an instant, pinning him to the wall opposite you.
You register sounds from the doorway and swivel to look; it’s Luda Mae and Monty, both shouting, but seemingly unwilling to enter the room. You ignore them and turn back to the conflict just in time to see Hoyt land a blow, his elbow striking Thomas’ temple hard enough to cause him to drop the smaller man. Hoyt is yelling too, but you can’t make it out, and then he’s running your way - he has to pass you to reach the door - but Thomas whirls, catches him right before he reaches you, and all but throws him out into the hallway. His feet leave the ground briefly, momentum overwhelming his movement, but Luda Mae and Monty catch him before he falls to the ground.
Thomas had stopped between you and the door, keeping guard, but you skirt him, reaching out to quickly grab the door and slam it shut. You lock it and turn to face him. You’re both panting; his hands are clenched into fists, eyes wild and staring past you, brows furrowed heavily. You remain where you are for a moment, looking at him, trying to decide how to proceed. Finally you approach, carefully.
“Hey. Are you okay?” You ask softly, reaching out to touch his forearm. He startles when you connect, even though your movement had been slow, and finally makes eye contact with you. The anger drains from his face. You hand falls from his arm as he raises it, watching you closely for any sign of resistance. You don’t flinch away, and his fingers graze lightly across the side of your neck before settling flat against your skin. Were the red marks starting to show already? His thumb strokes gently back and forth. His eyes are soft and questioning.
“I’m okay,” you answer, voice betraying your words with its roughness. “I’m more worried about you - that was a big hit. Sit down,” you soothe, pushing against him a little.
His touch vanishes from your neck and he allows you to guide him to the bed, sitting down on the edge. You remain standing in front of him, just within reach, bringing a hand up slowly toward his face.
“Can I check your head? I won’t mess with your mask.”
He nods, looking past you again. You lift one hand to cup the side of his face while the other runs through the hair at his temple, parting it so you can check for injury. His eyelids flutter and half-close.
“Well, it’ll probably bruise, but it looks okay. Thomas?” Your voice is nearly a whisper. His eyes open back up and meet yours. “Thank you. I, uh, guess I was in trouble there.”
You want to laugh it off, but the way your throat constricts when you try makes you think the sound will come out as a sob instead, so you settle for a shaky exhale. Tears start prickling the corners of your eyes anyway.
His eyes widen, and then his hands are hovering indecisively on either side of you, while he searches your face intensely. You blink, and a couple tears break free and run down your face. Thomas surges forward, grabbing you by the waist and pulling you toward him. He keeps one hand there and wraps the other arm around your back, keeping you flush against his torso and pressing his face to your collarbones.
You hold still, stunned, afraid to move or even breathe. The tears dry on your face and no new ones follow. Finally you shift, gently resting your chin on the top of his head and weaving one hand into his hair. You remain this way for a while - silent, while he rests in the sound of your heartbeat and you steady yourself with rhythmic rise and fall of his breathing.
#It's long. I got carried away~#my heart is all aflutter#thomas hewitt#texas chainsaw massacre#slashers#slasher fandom#Rune writes slashers#90 days series
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Second part done! Read on AO3 or here! SFW!
Chapters: 2/2 Fandom: Critical Role (Web Series) Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Caduceus Clay & The Mighty Nein, Caduceus Clay & Jester Lavorre, Caduceus Clay & Mollymauk Tealeaf, Caduceus Clay & Yasha, Caduceus Clay & Caleb Widogast, Caduceus Clay & Beauregard Lionett Characters: Caduceus Clay, Jester Lavorre, Mollymauk Tealeaf, Yasha (Critical Role), Nott | Veth Brenatto, Caleb Widogast, Beauregard Lionett Additional Tags: Tickling, Revenge, Shrinking, wild magic mishaps, safeword, Teasing Summary:
Caduceus has made a habit of tickling some of his companions, be it as a cheer-up, a settle-down or a playful punishment. When a mishap with some wild magic makes his smaller than his friends, a few decide to get a little revenge.
CHAPTER 2 TEXT
They’d all agreed to wait a few days before going anywhere weird or dangerous, at least until Caduceus was back to normal. Sure, he didn’t fight using his size much, but the dangerously thin firbolg looked so breakable without his formidable height that they agreed to wait it out. After all, it was only a few days.
So naturally, trouble had found them.
They were lucky, really. Nobody was hurt badly, just a few scrapes and bruises. The spellcasters were burnt out, though.
“OK…” Jester said as they breathed a sigh of relief after entering the tower’s front door. “I got one healing word in me. Caduceus, want me to take care of that cut on your head?”
Caduceus reached up to touch it. It was barely a scrape. “Nah, I’m good. Maybe take down some of the bruising on Yasha’s arm?”
Jester did so, and Caduceus started to float upward toward his room. Thanks to the floating he didn’t even notice he was being followed until two sets of feet set down behind him, two bodies suddenly moving to walk with him pressed between them.
He looked up. It wasn’t Beau and Yasha, as he would have expected, Yasha being the only one to share the floor with him. It was Beau and Caleb, both smirking in ways that made his stomach squirm.
“Hey Caleb, did you hear what went on down there?”
“Ja, I think I did, Beauregard.”
“I think Caduceus just dodged a healing spell.”
Panic ripped a gasp out of Caduceus chest. “I did NOT!”
He started to try and break away from them, but Beau caught him around his middle and hugged him tight from behind. She lifted him off the ground easily, his feet kicking the air while Caleb stared him down.
“Jester offered you healing and you refused, Herr Clay. These are your rules. We have a zero tolerance policy, you see.”
Caduceus squirmed in Beau’s grasp. “It’s not the same –”
“Um, actually…” Beau cut him off, starting to walk them toward his room, “I’d like to refer you back to a previous instance of you counting Caleb’s ribs two months ago, where you involved Mollymauk for the first time. I believe it was the seventh instance of this punishment being meted out. In that instance, there were limited healing spells left and Caleb’s injury was superficial, but you cited the zero tolerance policy.”
“Ungh!” Caduceus grunted, trying to tug himself free of two arms as strong as ship cable, “You two are–”
“–Going to find out how many ribs a firbolg has?” Caleb teased over a very frightening little smirk that broke into a grin when his eyes flicked over Caduceus’ shoulder. “Veth the brave! I could use your assistance!”
When Beau turned to look he caught sight of Veth floating at the centre of the tower, her arms crossed and an amused look on her face. Her eyes met Caduceus’ gaze for a second.
“Nah. You guys have fun.”
Beau jostled Caduceus as she addressed Caleb. “Don’t worry you skinny shit, I’ll hold him down for you so you can get a little payback.”
“Noo…” Caduceus whimpered, the futility of the situation growing ever clearer. Caleb and Beau ignored him, talking to each other over his head instead as they entered his bedroom.
“Hey, has he ever done that thing where he tickles you until you say nice things about yourself?”
“Ugh. Ja.”
“So what’s he gotta say?” Beau climbed onto the bed with Caduceus still in her arms, keeping his back to her front.
“Hmm. We could make him say something mean, but that does not quite fit….”
“Nah.” Beau started to wrestle with Caduceus arms, fighting to get them up over his head. “How about just ‘I deserve this’ over and over until we’re satisfied?”
Caduceus fought her, whimpering, but her hands were as quick as sparrows and it was barely a moment before she had his wrists gripped tight. He tried to twist and get his feet under him on the bed, but Caleb grabbed his ankles and tripped his feet out as he perched on the side.
“Ja, that works for me.” Caleb shoved Caduceus’ shirt up, tucking it behind his head to keep it out of the way.
“No no no!” Caduceus wheezed as he saw his wizard friend and frequent victim smiling like a cat who caught the canary and floating his hands in a move that was clearly meant to rile him. It worked.
“Ah, you can take it, I’m sure.” the wizard answered, meeting his eyes with a wicked glitter in his gaze, “I mean, you could safeword, but I don’t think you will. Not when you know you deserve this.”
Caduceus choked a little at the reference to his very first time counting Caleb’s ribs, a whine building in the back of his throat as the man’s hands drifted closer. Oh, he was in for it . It might be easier just to cast gentle repose on himself now— Jester wouldn’t be able to bring him back until the morning.
“Alright, so we start with number one, ja?”
Caleb’s ink-stained fingertips found Caduceus’ lowest rib, flatter and broader than a human’s. The firbolg bit his lip and whimpered as first they only grazed the downy hair there before starting to pinch along the length.
“Eeheek!” Caduceus squeaked, his heels drumming on the soft bedspread as giggles poured out..
“There, just like the first time.” Caleb teased over a tight-lipped smile. “Although, actually…” Caleb’s fingers started to attack him on one side, and then the other, switching back and forth to make him writhe. “That first time, you did it one side at a time, didn’t you? So, do you deserve this, Herr Clay?”
“Noho! I- I caught you ahaha– with aha broken rib thahahat first time!”
“He what ?!” Came a growl from over Caduceus’ shoulder.
“Ah– nothing. Moving on. Two!” Caleb’s hands jumped up one rib, drawing a satisfying squeal from their captive. “Now, the second time was still just you, but a little more like… this.”
Caleb ducked down to nuzzle his nose and cheek across Caduceus’ lower rib cage. The gentle pressure and rough hair along his cheek nearly made Caduceus jump out of his skin. His back arched, his body driven back into Beau’s embrace for lack of a better place to go.
“Aha— AHAha— Ohoho, OHo OK! I deserve it! I deserve it!”
Caleb stopped nuzzling but put his fingers back to work immediately. “Wunderbar! Three.”
“Nohoho! I deserve it! Aahaa! Please!”
Caleb ignored him. “The third time… that was Veth and her feather, wasn’t it?”
Caleb pulled away to dig around his coat, and Caduceus got a precious moment to breath. He slumped against Beau and tried his best to unscramble himself.
“Got it!” Said Caleb.
Caduceus’ eyes shot open to see the wizard twirling a quill in his hand.
“Eep! Wait! I deserve it, I deserve it, I deserve it! ”
Caleb flicked the soft fronds of the feather across one rib, then another. “It’s good that you can admit that now. So here is three, and there is four… I’m sure you have more ribs than I have vengeance, right, Herr Clay?”
Cad was too breathless to answer, slumped against Beau in a frenzy of chirping giggles that pitched upward when Caleb jumped another rib. The feather was surprisingly maddening after the rough scrape of stubble.
“Five!” Caleb cheered, “so the next time would have been Yasha…”
“NO! Nononono! Pleeheeheehease!” Caduceus didn’t bother telling them he deserved it this time, that clearly wasn’t getting him anywhere.
Caleb chuckled, exchanging a devilish wink with Beauregard over Cad’s shoulder before leaning in to nip at the side of Caduceus’ ribcage.
His reaction was more scream than laughter. Oh, the teeth were bad . The biting had all the same staticy mix of sensations that the nuzzles did with the added maddening little scrape of teeth. His breathing was hitched, his legs were kicking desperately against the bedspread. By the time Caleb let up there were tears in his eyes.
Caleb let him catch his breath and watched him with a little softness.
“While we are not nearly even for what you have put me through, I do feel a little bad. You’re nearly done, eh? How about this: We’ll skip to Mollymauk–”
“NO!” Caduceus yelped, still breathless.
“Hey, hey, calm down. I only want one. You made me use my safeword over a black eye, Herr Clay. You deserve much more, but if I get one, we may call it even.”
Caduceus’ whole body was rigid, and he groaned from behind clenched teeth. “Even? Blank slate?”
Caleb chuckled at the answer. “Ja. Blank slate. Until you decide to torture me again.”
“Well that’s up to you, man.” Caduceus growled, shutting his eyes tight and clenching his teeth. “OK. Do it.”
“Ja?” Caleb asked with a renewed smile.
“Yes!”
“You’re ready?”
“Cale–”
Pbbbbbt!
That sound again, this time mostly drowned out by a bleating shriek as Caduceus jerked like he was hit by lightning. The single raspberry felt like it went on forever, a rare credit to Caleb’s lung capacity.
When Caleb pulled back he was chuckling, partly out of delight for his vengeance and partly out of mirth at Caduceus’ reaction, now starting to fade into a collection of leftover giggles, sniffles and hiccups. Beau let go of his arms and hugged him to let him lean against her and catch his breath.
“The next *hic* time you beg for *hic* mercy…”
“You’ll take it very easy on me. We are even, remember? No vengeance allowed.”
Shit . Caduceus winced. He hadn’t processed what he was agreeing to, something the wizard had undoubtedly been hoping for.
“You know, I think this erases your escalations, too.” Beau added from over his shoulder. “Blank slate, right?”
Caleb brightened considerably. “Ja! A blank slate. Starting from the beginning.”
Caduceus growled, crossing his arms and trying to look annoyed while still hiccuping. Beau crawled out from behind him, and they both rose to their feet. Caleb planted a kiss on top of his head.
“Goodnight, Herr Clay.”
…..
He was big again before long. It happened when he was sleeping, and the next morning he’d made a pot of tea by the time he realized he no longer needed two hands to pour. The epiphany made him spring up straight, a smile on his face. He felt like himself again.
It was Veth who trundled into the kitchen first.
“Good morning!” Caduceus greeted her.
“Oh! I see you’re back. Are you happy to be big again?”
“Well, it’s a little more.. Me.”
“Yes, I think it is,” her eyes glittered at him, “now you’ll be safe from the others.”
“Heh.” Caduceus nodded, “I think everyone who wanted revenge got it by now. But I am glad to be a little harder to pin down. Thank you for not helping them.”
He turned toward the sink with his mug, and Veth was suddenly hanging off his back with her feet braced on his belt.
“We both know I don’t need you to be small to get you, do I Mr. Clay?” She whispered in his ear.
Caduceus barely got one large hand over his own mouth before one of Veth’s small ones was plunged down the back of his shirt collar. Her arm disappeared there, fingers scrabbling at the skin between his shoulder blades. He squawked into his hand, legs collapsing and spine twisting. He ended up on his knees, trying desperately to shake her off as she moved with him like a rucksack, as slippery as an itch he couldn’t reach to scratch.
“Ok! Ahaa! Ok! Veth, please!” He wheezed around his hand.
She did stop, hopping off his back with a little smirk. “Don’t worry, I’m gonna keep that secret and hold over you for a while yet.”
“Wonderful.” Caduceus groaned from his position curled up in a ball on the floor.
“Just don’t get cocky and I’ll never have a reason to TAKE YOU DOWN!”
“Alright, alright.” He sighed as he stood up. “Deal. Mercy. And don’t worry, Caleb already negotiated a pretty generous immunity offer for himself.”
Veth snorted. “Please. Do that as much as you want. Just don’t. Get. Cocky.”
“Ok, Veth.”
#critickle role#caduceus clay#tickle fic#tk fic#caleb widogast#beauregard lionett#veth bernatto#tickling#ticklish#rib tickling
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lit, y/n and the group (leo, calypso, apollo) go ghost hunting around the city during Halloween, apollo and leo are screaming, calypso has successfully freaked out apollo and lit and y/n and literally just making fun of apollo and leo
I'm so sorry anon, I wanted to make a whole fic story for you but I've been sitting on this for forever so here are some headcanons and a loose plot:
Leo doesn't think ghosts are real. Well, okay, he knows they're real but all the "ghosts" that the others see/feel aren't actually ghosts.
That makes it all the better when Leo releases the loudest shriek you've ever heard. He's panicking and running to the group babbling about something touching him and it sets Apollo on edge. (His jacket got caught by a door handle, nothing touched him.)
Lityerses actually has experience with ghosts and believes in them wholeheartedly so he's not taking any chances. He's glued to your side and any time you try to extricate yourself he holds your hand so you feel just a little bad.
Calypso is having a field day! She's taking pictures of Apollo's crying, she's noting how high a pitch Leo screams, she's making them more and more on edge with her magic. All around she's a little pocket of chaos and it's lovely.
You all end up coming across an abandoned house on the outskirts of town and you, being the biggest baddest of them all, say you should go in. Apollo and Leo's eyes widen, Apollo starts making excuses like being too precious to die but Calypso, oho, Cal's ready to go in.
After a moment of debate, you all go in. It really is a broken down house. The paint is peeled from the walls, there are termite markings in the walls, the stairs are rotted out in places and it just reeks of decay.
After a minute of nothing happening, the group decides to split up and check the place out. You find yourself alone in the upstairs bathroom but Lityerses is in the next room over. You managed to convince him for some space and he gave it.
You have to admit, it was a little creepy to be in this broken down house. The wind caught on broken windows and whistled through the holes, there is no light so your phone flashlights are all you have. You saw graffitti on the walls on the way up. A shiver runs down your spine and you close the medicine cabinet your were looking in. You got a bad feeling about the situation.
"Hey, guys?!" You call out. "We should probably go."
No response.
"Not funny!" You call out.
Silence replies and you grit your teeth. You leave the bathroom and enter the bedroom, ready to grab Lit and leave. There's nobody in the room. Now the panic starts to set in.
"Lit!?" No response. You look around the other rooms and don't find him. You're about to collapse on the floor when you hear a screech below you. You tear down the broken stairs to find the living room empty.
"HELLO?!" You scream. Footsteps pound on concrete and the rest of your friends burst into the room from the little hallway.
"GET OUT, GO, RUN." Leo shouts and you turn tail, racing to the broken window you entered through. After you all are a good ways from the house and catching your breath, you ask what happened.
"We went to the basement-" Apollo starts and gulps in oxygen. "-and we heard noises."
"Something touched me. No, no, something grabbed me." Lityerses says.
"Why did you leave me?" You ask him. He grows sheepish.
"I wanted to startle you, but I got scared instead."
Calypso, who this entire time, looks like the cat who caught the canary.
"Cal, you look a little guilty." Leo says. "What did you do?"
"I may have, um, there have been no ghosts the entire night. It's been me." She says. "I'm the ghosts."
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Squealing Santa 2020- Cheating
“You should have thought about that before you cheated.” Iida shows Kaminari what happens when he cheats. @tickly-floof @ticklygiggles
Kaminari finally succeeds in cheating on his Hero History test when it rubs Iida the wrong way, punishment ensues. (He is the Class Rep and all.) Fandom; BNHA/MHA
A/N: Sorry that the characterization might not be great, but I figured it was pretty close for someone who hasn't written anything creative for months😁 hope you like it! Merry Christmas❤
For once in a lifetime, Class 1-A was actually warned about a test before Aizawa Sensei walked into class with the paperwork in one hand and a sleeping bag in the other. Everyone had prepared differently, some spent a whole week pouring over assignments and textbooks, some let it slip into the background and crammed at the last minute, and some decided they could sneak past the Class Rep while he was leading a study group and steal the answers. Kaminari thought he was smart, and he spent a good hour patting himself on the back for getting the test copy without his teacher or Iida noticing.
Normally, Kaminari would have shared, if he was honest he intended to, but he was already so impressed with his expertly executed recon mission that he didn’t want Mina to accidentally say something at the wrong time or have Mineta find out and bribe him for answers. Yes, Normally he would have shared, but a success like this was hardly normal.
Kaminari’s second success was when he somehow managed to sneak his answers into the class and turn in his test without revealing himself. He was sure that at this point, Aizawa was either letting it slide or losing his touch.
Not more than a day later did the tests come back, and kaminari could not have been happier. He’d thrown a few answers to look less suspicious and managed to land himself a solid B, the highest grade he’d had in years. He was so busy fawning over it in the dorms that he never even noticed Mina come up behind him in the dining area.
“Is that your test, Kami? Ooh! Let me see, let me see! Did you flunk it too?” Mina had pulled the test from his hands before he could even react to her presence, thankfully she was out of the way before a startled shock jumped between his fingertips.
“Woah! Hey, lay off!” Kaminari twisted in his chair as he tried to grab his test back, “Be careful, you’ll crumple it!”
“You say that like you wanna tape it to the fridge, what did you get, an F minus?” Mina giggled, using one hand to push Kami away and the other to hold the paper up as she scanned it, “Woah! What the hell, Kami!? How’d you get a B?” Kaminari nearly fell out of his chair when she removed her hand from his face to cradle the test in both hands.
“You what?” Iida’s voice echoed through the room as he stood up on the other side of the table where he, Midoriya, Todoroki, and Yaoyorozu had been going over their grades. The Rest of the class must have been off doing the same in the solitude of their rooms.
“Nice work Kaminari!” Midoriya cheered from his seat, ever encouraging. Several positive reactions came from around the room as Bakugou appeared seemingly out of nowhere to tear the paper from Mina’s hands.
“Damn, Sparky, not bad, you cheat or something?” Bakugou scoffed, eyebrows quirked as he scanned the test over before Iida stomped over and took the test as well, earning an indignant growl from the blond.
“Precisely my question,” Iida frowned over the test before narrowing his eyes at Kaminari, “Cheating is forbidden in all testing environments,if you achieved this grade through dis-honest means-”
“Woah woah woah! Everybody slow down, I didn’t cheat! I just studied! Can we please just stop playing Ring Around the Rosie with my test?” Kaminari begged, speaking a little too quickly as he leapt from his seat to grab his test, only for Iida to catch his wrist.
“Oh, I don’t think so, you never study, especially of your own accord. Don’t lie to me. Did. You. Cheat?” Iida seemed more bristled than usual, his frown deeper and his height towering.
“Jeez, Iida, let me have this!”
“Answer the question.”
“I- well…” Kaminari gulped, “Okay fine! Yes, I cheated, but I think I should be getting a pat on the back anyway,do you know how hard it was to sneak past you and Aizawa Sensei? My recon skills should be applauded!” He pulled his wrist from Iida’s grip and threw his hands in the air, pouting.
“Kaminari!” Iida chastised, “You are a student of UA, you should be holding yourself to a higher standard than this!”
“Calm down, Iida! It’d just one stupid test!” Kaminari held his hands out defensively as Iida started stepping closer, Kami stepping back. At this point, everyone had grown quiet. Bakugou had stepped back to watch the show, Mina simply taking a seat on the table to stay out of the fray, and the study group in the corner sharing looks, wondering if they should be breaking this up.
Nobody had ever seen Iida this angry, however, nobody had ever successfully cheated on a test either, “It is not just a ‘stupid test!’” Iida’s voice had yet to raise, but it certainly seemed more strained as he stepped forward, jabbing a finger at Kaminari with every step as the test crumpled in his other hand. “As Class Rep, it is my job to ensure that 1-A is holding a standard and behaving as future heroes should, and as of this moment you have done nothing but shatter that image!”
Iida had backed Kami into a wall, leaving the boy nowhere to go but sideways, causing Iida’s poke to miss its mark on Kami’s chest and land on his side instead. It was the strangled yelp that left Kaminari’s throat that seemed to sober Iida for a moment.
“Kaminari?” His voice was calmer, concerned as he scanned over his classmate, “Are you alright? Did I hurt you?”
“Nope! I mean! Uh-” he swallowed, “I’m fine! All good! I would like to leave this conversation though, so if you don’t mind-” Kami moved to pass Iida, a faint blush on his cheeks, only for the taller boy to gently push him back into the wall by his shoulder and reach for his side.
“Absolutely not. You don’t have much of an honesty streak going,and if you’re hurt your injuries should be addressed!” Iida gingerly started squeezing Kaminari’s side, searching for whatever injury caused his outcry, paying careful attention to how the boy stiffened.
“H-Hey! Easy, Iida, I told you, I’m fine!” Kami insisted, pushing at Iida’s hand, still firmly planted on his shoulder. “Seriously, man, just lay- Ah!” The squeak certainly caught Iida’s attention.
“Is that where it hurts?” Iida questioned, gently pressing on the little spot beneath Kami’s ribs to feel for injuries.
“No, Iida! Wahait!” Kami dipped his head low and pulled a leg up to his stomach as his giggle escaped, trying to block Iida’s fingers.
It took the Class Rep about ten seconds of confused staring to finally get it. “Oh.” The subtle grin that spread across Iida’s face was devilish, and his tone was no better, drawing Kami’s wide eyes up to meet his.
“Oh god, don’t you dare.”
“I think I dare.”
The attack was sudden and brutal, the test still held between Iida’s hand and Kami’s shoulder was forgotten as the larger boy dug into Kami’s lower ribs, rippling his fingers up the boy’s ribcage as he squealed.
“Iida! No no no waIT! Gaha! Gehet ohohoff! Iida!” Kami flailed, floundering between pushing Iida away and slamming his arms down, eventually settling to slide down the wall and try to turn out of Iida’s gip, the test fluttering to the ground as his escape was cut short by a large arm pulling Kami’s back to Iida’s chest and digging into his ribs.
“Well, I think I’ve just figured out how to discourage cheating in the class.” Iida proclaimed as he dove his second arm into the frey, scratching at Kami’s stomach. By now, the rest of the room had relaxed and started chuckling along, Bakugou grumbling something about wanting to see that fist fight and leaving for his room. Mina had taken to giggling hysterically and shouting tips from the sidelines, not that Iida was hearing any of it. #
“Iidaha! Stohohop, oho my Gohohod! Plehease! I cahahan’t!” Kami kicked wildly as he clawed at the hands assaulting his torso, squeezing his eyes shut and slamming his head back against Iida’s shoulder.
“Maybe you should have considered that before you cheated, after all, your plan was so well executed.” Iida spoke in Kami’s ear, causing the boy to crinkle his neck and pull his legs to his chest momentarily, a squeak breaking through his laughter. When holding his weight grew too distracting, Iida chose to sit down right where he was, trapping Kami in his lap as he counted up his ribs.
“Tell you what, if you can tell me the correct answer to one of these test questions without your cheat sheet, I’ll let you go. Sounds good?”
“Whahahat!? Nohohoho! I cahahan’t! Iidahaha, plehehease!”
“Great! Now, let’s see here…” Iida leaned to the left a little, peeking at a question on the first page, Kami had spent plenty of time staring at it, he must have learned something, “What President approved ‘Hero’ as a job in the states?”
“Ihihi- ohoho gohod! Ihihi dohon’t know!” Kami started sliding down in Iida’s lap with his squirming, laughter bright if not a little panicked.
“Sure you do! Guess.”
“Uhuhum! K-Kehenedy?” he shrieked a little as Iida flipped him out of his lap and onto the floor, leaning over him as he started drilling into his hips.
“Not even close. Maybe you need some encouragement.”
“IHIHIIDAHA! Nohoho! Nohohot theheheHEHERE! Gehehet ohohohoff!” Little sparks started jumping from Kami’s hair and skin, not enough to hurt, but enough to be startling, so Iida pulled his hands away just in time for Kami to arch his back and kick the wall, connecting his heel right with a wall socket and promptly knocking out the power. For a moment, all you could hear was Kami’s huffing breaths and slowing yet hysterical giggles as he calmed down, this quiet was short-lived, however, as the whole room busted out laughing.
“Oho my Gohod, Kami! What did you do?” Mina cackled, Midoriya wheezing like a dying seal in the corner, bent over the far end of the table. Even Todoroki was Chuckling wildly.
“What the FUCK, Sparky!?” Bakugou called from upstairs, presumably seething. Kaminari stopped sparking just as a glowing-eyed Aizawa walked into the room with his Capture Weapon gripped in his hands.
“What is going on in here!?”
The chorus of different students laying out blame on Kami and Iida did the poor eclectic hero no good in his explanation of his test results.
#squealingsanta2k20#squealingsanta2k2020#mha tickles#bnha tickles#ticklish kaminari#iida tickles#tickle fanfic#tickling#tickles#fanfic
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Gilgamesh's Bizarre McDonalds Adventure
A short story about Gilgamesh's first experience at McDonalds. A great adventure ensues!!!
It was a blistering hot day within the city; golden rays of sunlight beaming overhead. As Gilgamesh made his way through the bustling masses of humans surrounding his resplendent visage, he caught sight of a rather mundane building, with sparkling golden arches attached to it. Although its architecture was bland- if not entirely disappointing for the king-he appreciated their logo.
"Hoh, what an amusing use of gold that is!" Perching his Gucci brand sunglasses on the bridge of his perfectly-shaped nose, curiosity danced a merry jig within his heart. He would check out this location, poste-haste!
Seas of passers-by split in two, as they gazed in awe at the fashionable king of heroes, mouths agape with wonder. As Gilgamesh soaked within the ecstasy of receiving such arduous attention, he trooped inside of the local McDonalds. He was a man on a mission. As he gazed upon the glowing boards, and begrudgingly joined the queue; he formulated an order within his mind.
'Although one such as I should have no need to wait, I shall exercise patience for now.' Gilgamesh was much more patient than some would perceive him to be. Although he possessed disdain for the laws of the mongrels, he would sometimes abide to them.
Finally. The queue had ever-so-rightfully dispersed, finally giving him the chance to make an order! As Gilgamesh glided towards the counter, his gleaming red orbs widened with horror. Bright orange hair, golden eyes, and a worn-out expression...
Standing right before him was none other than his master, Gudako.
"Hello, how may I collect your order- HOLY SHIT!" Ruby red eyes gazed into amber ones; confusion etched upon both of their faces. "G-GILGAMESH?! WHY ARE YOU AT MCDONALDS?!"
"Heh, you've asked a good question, mongrel," Plonking his arm upon Gudako's worktop, he leans forward; eyes gleaming. "It was nothing but a mere coincidence! Places as inferior as these don't usually garner my attention, but..."
"...You liked the golden arches of the logo, didn't you?" Gudako couldn't help but crack a grin at that.
"You know your king well." It took all of Gudako's strength to stop herself from bursting out into laughter from that.
Lowering her cap so that Gilgamesh couldn't catch her befuddled expression, she sighs. "But to think we'd meet when I'm on shift! That's a funny coincidence."
"If only I had known sooner. I would've taken great pleasure in extorting my connection with you to obtain an endless supply of nuggets!" Realization dawned upon Gilgamesh, as he snapped his fingers. "On that note. I shan't dally any further. Bring me two units of 20-piece chicken nuggets, Gudako!"
"Understood." It took Gudako a monumental amount of effort to stop herself from laughing at the sheer absurdity of this situation. On average, she found him to be utterly frightening; but during times such as these, he was quite fun to be around.
"That'll be USD $10-" A massive golden bar smashed against the counter, as the surrounding customers' eyes popped out of their sockets. "...I only asked for $10..." No matter how many times Gudako tried to pass the gold bar back, Gilgamesh vehemently refused. "B-but, Gilgamesh...W-we can't melt gold at McDonalds, you know..."
"And why should I care? This gold bar is for nobody but you. Take that as payment for providing me with such ample entertainment." Gilgamesh deviously winked as he left the counter, leaving an array of gobsmacked staff and customers behind. "Despite being in such a drab location; today's customer service was well beyond my expectations!!" As he went to collect his order- as fellow staff yelled and cheered as they crowded around the gold- Gudako desperately desired to be swallowed up by the ground.
'W-what the hell...' Gilgamesh really did march to the beat of his own drum sometimes...
|o|
Confidentially cradling two boxes of nuggets within his arms, Gilgamesh was about to make his way towards his seat; until a small figure bashed against his leg.
'Of all the godforsaken things to happen-' Gilgamesh was fully prepared to eviscerate the being who would dare to collide with his leg. However, he rescinded once he caught sight of what it was.
"M-my chicken nuggets...." It was none other than a small child, their nuggets splayed across the floor. "My poor nuggets..." As the child began to burst into tears, Gilgamesh crouched besides them.
"Mongrel." Gilgamesh commanded their attention instantly, as they spun to face him. "You should employ the utmost of caution when traipsing around places such as these." Feeling ashamed, the kid was about to burst into tears again, until Gilgamesh softly placed a hand on their shoulders; his expression warm. "Shh, there's no need to cry."
"B-but sire, my nuggets...They're the highlight of my day..."
"Hoh, is that so?" As the kid nodded their head, the king cackled with laughter. "You possess rather fine tastebuds, young one. Well then, shall I pay you with some nuggets in reparation?" The kid's eyes leapt with joy, as Gilgamesh passed him an entire box of nuggets. "Now, be off."
The kid happily yelled 'thank you!' as they waved and ran back to their table. Although Gilgamesh was a little pained to be passing with his nuggets, he didn't mind lending the child a hand.
However, he wouldn't have to mourn his nuggets for long! Not too soon after, another staff member passed him a new 20 pack of nuggets. "Here you go. The boy's parent wanted to give you a peace offering or something-" Before the staff could finish speaking, Gilgamesh randomly thrust a $10 dollar bill into their hand. "W-whoa, what's this?"
"Your tip. Take it."
It looked like he'd still get to eat 40 nuggets, after all.
|o|
As he finally located an empty table situated by the window, a set of very familiar figures assaulted his vision. A bespectacled purple-haired girl, a man decked in a cursed Hawaiian T-shirt, another character with spiky white hair; and a radiant, red-haired woman were all seated together, sharing a vast array of fast food.
"Oho, look who the cat decided to drag in here today!" Gilgamesh all but exclaimed, as he smirked at the unlucky bundle of servants.
"...I could say the exact same thing." Archer sighed, as he shifted as far away from Gilgamesh as possible, as Mash dropped her fries into her milkshake in shock- Boudicca almost choking on her burger.
"G-geh, Gilgamesh? What the hell are you doing here?!" Lancer Cu's face contorted with displeasure. "Of all the fucking people to appear..."
"And why should I satisfy you with an answer, mongrel?" Gilgamesh's response elicited nothing but sighs. "Let me hazard a guess- that faker over there is the reason why you're all gathered here today."
"That's just like you, to ask us for an answer; without providing one of your own. How classy of you." Archer was practically radiating with sarcasm. Before the two of them could start an argument, Mash cut in.
"Yes, we decided to give Gudako a surprise visit today!" Mash all but beamed. "I'm glad to see senpai working so hard at her job." As her and Boudica openly explained their motives to the king, Archer sighed.
At this rate, he'd never be rid of Gilgamesh.
TO BE CONTINUED....(lmao its only a parody fic)
#gilgamesh#fate series#my writing#gilgablog#gudako#this is what happens if you let me write about gilgamesh. i go MAD but anyway this is what i think he'd be like at maccy d's
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You've answered multiple of my requests before (which were SO awesome) so I'd like to request another: Main 6 HC reactions to MC filling their jacket with whoopie cushions and surprise hugging their LI?
thank you so much for always sending requests 🥺 😭, they’re so fun to write and i’m glad you’ve enjoyed them! 💗
I altered this a bit to be more generally about pranking the Main 6 with whoopie cushions
Asra
you’ve been in a prank war with Asra for pretty much as long as you’ve known him
the two of you are in constant competition to make the other laugh and when you spot a whoopie cushion at the market you know you have to get it
you’ve got the whoopie cushion hidden in your coat pocket and you’re ready for a surprise attack the second he walks in the door
when he walks in a few minutes later you immediately ambush him in a hug and he stumbles back to catch you, arms wrapping around you
the cute moment is ruined when he leans against your left pocket and a loud farting noise resounds throughout the empty shop
”Asra!” you say in mock horror, leaning back from the hug to take in his surprised face
”I’m pretty sure that wasn’t me MC.” he smiles, immediately disregarding it and launching into a story about his day at the palace
you’re a little disappointed by his lack of a reaction but it does leave you the chance to keep pranking him, a situation you take full advantage of
the whoopie cushion becomes a constant joke between the two of you, each of you hiding it for the other to find in the most embarrassing of moments
Asra declares you a winner, and calls a truce, when you manage to hide the whoopie cushion under his chair at a fancy dinner with Nadia
Julian
you’ve been plotting this prank for days and Julian had, annoyingly, been thwarting your plans
when you saw the whoopie cushion in the market you devised the plan to hide it where he would sit on it, but after days of Julian somehow managing to sit everywhere but where you placed the cushion you’ve decided on more direct action
the two of you are headed out to the Rowdy Raven and as he leans down to pull on his boots you deftly sneak the whoopie cushion into his back pocket, leaving no chance for a prank screw up
you walk arm in arm through the bustling streets of the South End, barely able to suppress a laugh at the thought of your not-so-devious prank until you reach the familiar tavern
Julian greets the bartender and leads you over to your usual corner booth, gesturing for you to sit first
you watch in anticipation as he slides into the booth across from you and sits down just as the bartender comes over with your drinks
the farting noise is immediate and very loud and you burst into laughter, watching as Julian’s face grow bright red in embarrassment
”Well, that was quite something.” The bartender says with a laugh, setting the drinks down and bringing a hand up to clap Julian on the shoulder
“That wasn’t me!” Julian says, putting his hands up in defense
he shifts in his seat and manages to sit on the whoopie cushion again causing you to break out into another peal of laughter, tears running down your face
he looks at you suspiciously and reaches his hand down to his pocket, finally seeming to feel the whoopie cushion
“I’ll get you back for that.” He leans in close to your face, a dangerous smirk on his face
”I’d like to see you try.”
Nadia
you love making Nadia laugh, after all the stress she’s dealt with in her life the sound of her bell-like laugh makes your heart warm
you’ve never tried a prank like this though, and you’re not so sure she’ll find it as funny as you do
but she’s been worried about the courtiers lately and you know she could really use a laugh so you’ve devised your plan, she’d promised you a dinner with just the two of you in the dining room so you snuck in early to hide a whoopie cushion under her usual chair
you’re sitting at your chair primly waiting for her arrival but are surprised to see her walk in with all of the courtiers in tow
”I’m sorry my dear, I know I said it would be just the two of us but we have more business that needs to be attended to right away.” She says apologetically, you're not even mad you’re nervous, frantically trying to find a way to alert her not to sit down
you hadn’t wanted to embarrass her in front of anyone else, least of all the courtiers, but before you can warn her everyone takes their seats
the loud sound of fake flatulence echoes throughout the room and for a heart-stopping moment nobody reacts until suddenly Nadia breaks out into laughter, surprising everyone in the room
she reaches under the chair to find the whoopie cushion and holds it up for everyone to see, none of the courtiers seem to react until they can tell Nadia isn’t upset and after another moment of silence they burst into clearly-forced laughter (except for Valerius who rolls his eyes in distaste)
”What a clever trick, MC was this your doing?” Nadia smiles at you
”I-uh, yes Nadia, I didn’t know the others would be here.” you say, unable to suppress a laugh at the situation
”I shall just have to get you back then.” She grins
a few days later she does just that and all day long you find yourself sitting on whoopie cushions, in the library, at dinner, in your room, even somehow the bench you sit on in the gardens causes a loud farting sound
you don’t know how she manages to pull it off, whether she’d enlisted magical help or simply purchased hundreds of whoopie cushions and had them placed everywhere you might go, either way it makes both of you laugh all day
Muriel
he’s usually pretty shy about showing his emotions, but lately you’ve begun to see him breaking out of his shell, the occasional smile and laugh brightening his face
you do everything you can to make him smile, constantly cracking jokes and puns in the hopes of making him react
when you’re in town visiting Asra one day you spot a whoopie cushion in the market and buy it, hoping it’ll be just the thing to make Muriel laugh
you hide it in your coat pocket and when you get back to the hut that night you rush into Muriel’s arms
he’s taken aback by the sudden hug but his confusion only grows at the loud noise the hug emits
you laugh at his bewildered expression and pull the whoopie cushion out of your pocket to show him, “It makes a farting noise when you press on it, it’s funny!” you explain
”If you say so.” He says, but you notice a hint of a smile on his face
the next morning you sit down to breakfast with him and are surprised by the loud farting noise of the whoopie cushion hidden on your chair
you burst into laughter and watch as Muriel does the same, his eyes crinkling in a big smile
“Did I do it right?” he asks
”Yes!” you reassure him, “You’re a master prankster!”
”You’re so weird…” he grumbles though he’s still smiling at you
“But you love it” you tease, already trying to plot your next prank
“I do.”
Portia
you and Portia have a very playful relationship, always trying to make each other laugh and keep things light hearted
you’ve had water fights, food fights, even joke competitions, but your favorite way to make her laugh is tickling her because she’s incredibly ticklish
after she almost accidentally kicks you in the face while you’re tickling her, you decide to try a different kind of prank
you’ve been planning this little prank since the day you spotted a joke stall at the market, waiting for the perfect moment to put the dozens of whoopie cushions you bought on sale to good use
you arrive at her cottage with your pockets full of whoopie cushions, ready to strike
when she opens the door she pulls you into a hug and is immediately greeted by a symphony of flatulence
she looks at you in bewildered silence for a second before she starts laughing, nearly bursting into tears as you join her
”What was that MC?” she asks after you’ve both caught your breath
”Whoopie cushions!” you hold one up to show her and she takes it from you, sticking it into her pocket
”We’ve got to find a way to use this on Ilya!” she smiles deviously
”I like the way you think Portia, let’s plot.”
Lucio
Lucio’s got a good sense of humor for the most part, but any jokes at his expense send him into an immediate bad mood
you know better than to try to prank him with a whoopie cushion, instead you’ll use it on yourself
you fill your coat pockets with them, making sure you’ve got some on every side just in case, and leave your room to search the palace for Lucio
you find him quickly- walking down a stairwell towards you, flanked by Mercedes and Melchior
”Lucio!” you yell, flinging yourself dramatically into his arms
he catches you and his face spreads into a grin as he wraps his arms around you, the grin abruptly falling at the sound of dozens of whoopie cushions farting resounds throughout the stairwell
”Uh, MC?” he doesn’t seem to know how to react, he looks slightly awkward which isn’t an emotion he feels very often
”It was a prank, Lucio, it was just whoopie cushions!” you explain as he continues to look blankly at you
”What cushions?” he asks, one brow quirking up in question
you explain, holding up one of the cushions to show him and demonstrating how it works
you’re a bit surprised he hasn’t ever heard of them, it seems like the sort of prank he’d enjoy- a point proven when he abruptly bursts into laughter
”Oho, give me some of those!” He smiles gleefully, reaching his hands out to you “I’m gonna get the courtiers so bad at our next meeting!”
you might have created a monster...
#ty for the request 💗#me writing the words symphony of flatulence I AM A SERIOUS WRITER#the arcana#the arcana headcanons#asra alnazar#julian devorak#nadia satrinava#muriel the arcana#portia devorak#count lucio#lucio the arcana#asra the arcana#julian the arcana#nadia the arcana#portia the arcana
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72 Investigations - The mystery of the missing Ruri-Chan part 2
part 1
An au where the reader is a private eye/detective with their own Detective agency.
Roles will be played by the demon brothers and other beloved obey me characters.
Y/N (Your Name) will be used for the reader's name.
Gender-neutral reader insert.
In our first case, you get hired by the wealthy hair Levi to find a mysteriously missing item.
You head outside, there is a car waiting.
"That's my car right there. I have a driver of course." Levi points to the expensive-looking car.
He really is a rich heir after all.
"It will be very cramped." Satan sighs.
"Nobody told you to come along." You huff at him.
"I'm sitting next to Y/N." Asmo seems rather cheerful.
"No, you aren't." You shake your head and head towards the car, you need the money from this job.
His driver seems rather impatient. "Can we start driving? I've got better things to do."
"Mammon, I said it before, and I'm going to say it again until your debt has been paid off you are my driver." Levi huffs and sits down next to you.
In the end, Asmo is forced to sit in the front, next to Mammon.
Mammon huffs and mumbles about unfair treatment.
Satan is busy looking out of the window, likely looking for cats.
Asmo tries to flirt with Mammon but quickly loses interest.
Finally, you arrive at Levi's home. It's a very lavish-looking mansion. Somehow it is exactly what you have been expecting.
You get out of the car and stretch a little after being cramped into the car for such a long time.
"This was one annoying car ride." Satan complaints.
"Just go home then, nobody invited you." You glare at Satan.
"I don't know what you want. I had a great time. Now look at that mansion, you should invite me to your next party." Asmo winks towards Levi.
"Umm… I don't do parties." Levi shifts uncomfortably around.
"Too bad." Asmo shrugs.
"You need to behave. Don't screw up my chance to earn some money." You hiss at Asmo, who just smiles at you.
"You should say that to him." Asmo points towards Satan, who somehow found a cat.
You sigh and start your investigation. "Where is the room in question?"
"It's the room with metal bars." Levi points to a room on the first floor.
You carefully go closer, looking for footprints or anything else that is suspicious. Sadly the ground is dry and there is nothing to find.
"Let's go inside next." You head back to Levi. "That was like some real detective work right there." He seems impressed.
"I couldn't find anything yet though." You feel a bit embarrassed by his compliment.
"I'll now show you the scene of the crime. Sadly I had to close the window, to protect the rest of my collection." Levi has obviously seen some crime dramas.
"It's alright. Please stay out of the room."
You get some tools out, your camera and dusting set, and then carefully walk over to the stand for the stature.
It's dead center in the room. The glass from the former case is shattered across the floor. Most of it is lying on the opposite side of the window.
Next, you go towards the window while looking for footprints. You only see a bit of dirt under the window. It looks like something or someone came from this window and went in the direction of the class case.
"How often do you open the window?" You ask Levi.
"Two times a day. Once in the morning and once in the evening." Levi answers promptly.
You look at the mechanism that closes the window. It looks pretty standard. You open the window and find the metal bars are all intact and way too small for any person to fit through. Then you see a small amount of white hair. You put it in a small plastic bag.
Then you look at one of the still intact glass cases. "Do these have some sort of alert when you lift or touch them?" You ask Levi.
"Yeah, but I tend to forget to turn them on and off. I know it's a bad habit." Levi sighs.
You nod, and then you see a black card in front of one of the other class cases.
"Oho, a calling card of the sunrise thief." Satan notices the symbol right away. This doesn't surprise you since it contains a cat and a sun symbol.
"It looks like one, but he is known for leaving messages on the cards. I can't think of him stealing something of such little value either. It might be a fake one." You still bag it as part of the evidence.
"Yeah, he probably would be more interested in this huge gem here." Asmo looks in awe at a huge green gem in the corner of the room.
"That gem is a prop from a show. I had the real gem but sold it after I found the one they used. It's so much cooler, to be honest." Levi seems pretty proud of his collection.
"That is an interesting fact, but I don't think the sunrise thief has anything to do with Ruri-chan." You shake your head.
"You closed the door last night, is that right?" Moving on to your next question.
"I do that every evening, but it's never locked," Levi adds another interesting fact.
You nod. "I need to close the door for a moment." You do just that and dust the door handle but nothing.
Well, this would've been too easy.
You open the door again. "Were all the entrance doors locked last night?"
"Yes, the front door is always locked unless I have guests and the same goes for the back door. The front door was definitely locked this morning as well." Levi seems to recall this fact.
"Okay, can you lead me to the back door?" You have a feeling about what happened at this point, but there are still some open questions.
"You mean us." Satan chimes in.
You only shake your head at him.
"Here is the backdoor. What the hell happened here?" Levi hasn't been in the room yet and is very surprised.
There is stuff scattered everywhere. It looks like something ran right towards the window and knocked everything in its path.
You carefully walk over to the window that is still a bit open and look outside. You can see a few plants outside have also been knocked over. You try opening the window, but it doesn't budge. No human could squeeze through here.
"Could you unlock the door?" You turn to Levi. He nods and opens the door.
You look under the window. There is a small indent on the floor that looks pretty suspicious.
Now almost everything seems to add up. "But if I'm right then where is the stature?" You say this mostly to yourself.
"You are definitely missing a suspect." Satan grins at you, this kind of smile really irks you. He has clearly solved the case completely.
"The person with debt big enough to be forced to work for Levi?" You know right away who he is talking about.
Satan nods. "Time to face the thief."
"Well from my point of view you already faced the thief earlier, and I'd say you were pretty friendly with them." You sigh and eye Satan. He just shrugs. "I'd say the human is the true criminal here."
Levi looks at you two in confusion.
"Just kiss already and tell us who did it. I have an important appointment." Asmo sighs loudly.
You glare at Asmo. "Fine, let's move to the front of the building. With a bit of luck, Ruri-chan is there."
Levi's face lights up with the sheer mention of this name. "Do you think so?"
"I hope so at least." You try not to get his hopes too high.
In the front of the building, you can Mammon, fidgeting with something.
Levi sees the Object and practically runs over to Mammon. "My Ruri-chan!" He takes his precious statue from Mammon. "You filthy thief! How could you do this to my poor Ruri-chan?" Levi carefully pets his stature.
"He didn't take Ruri-chan. He just found her behind the building." I intend to clear Mammon from the accusation.
"What? How do you know that?" Levi seems surprised.
"It would have been impossible for him to fit through the metal bars to get into the house. Furthermore, all doors were locked, and none of them looked like they were tampered with." You start to explain to Levi.
"What about the kitchen window? That was somewhat open." Levi doesn't seem to believe it.
"The window is stuck in a way that no human could fit through it. You can try opening it, but it will not move." You continue with your explanation.
"I suppose that's true but who kidnapped my Ruri-chan?" Levi holds his statue closely.
"I don't think the thief intended to steal anything. Since the culprit was the cat." You point at the cat that is peacefully sleeping in Satan's arm.
"Hey, hey don't you go accuse cats of stealing. She just wanted to play." Satan huffs.
"Regardless, it was the cat. The first hint is the small gap between the iron bars in front of the window. Only a cat would fit in between them. Then I found a bit of cat hair between the bars. The lack of finger or footprints supports the theory. I'm not quite sure what led to the cat pushing the glass case down, but I suspect she just got very startled by the sound and took Ruri-chan and ran off with her. Then she escaped through the kitchen window, where she dropped Ruri-chan. In the end, Mammon found it there and took it." You finish by explaining the whole rundown of events.
Satan nods along." The poor cat."
Levi seems surprised by the rundown but seems to accept it. "I need to leave the window closed from now on and I will get to fix that window. Regardless, I'm very glad you found my Ruri-chan. Thank you very much Y/N." Levi seems to be moved to tears.
"I'm glad that everything is well. I hope Ruri-chan wasn't damaged, I mean hurt too much." You couldn't take a closer look at the statue.
"She seems fine, but I will give her a good cleaning and check of injuries just in case. I will tell everyone you did a great job." Levi carefully holds his stature and then reaches into his jacket pocket and pulls out a big stack of cash. He then proceeds to hand it to you.
You look at the number of big bills. "This is way too much." It's more than enough money for a good half-year of rent.
"You have earned it for bringing Ruri-chan home. Thank you again." Levi is pretty insistent about it and holds out the money.
You reluctantly take it. "Thank you for the payment."
"No problem. I will now take care of Ruri-chan. Take them all home Mammon." Levi glares slightly at Mammon, who shrugs and gets the car ready.
"Isn't that lucky you should invite me out sometime but for now I have to go. My nails aren't going to paint themselves. Bye, bye." Asmo casually waves and walks off.
You can't see Satan anywhere and frankly don't care enough to look for him.
You go to the car and get inside.
"Are the others not coming?" Mammon doesn't sound like he cares much but asks anyway.
"Yeah, it's just us now." You shrug.
"OK, where do you want to be dropped off?" Mammon starts the car.
"Just drop me back where you picked us up." You give him a small smile.
"Alright." Mammon then drives you back home.
"We are here but here... take my card." Mammon awkwardly hands you a business card with his number. "Since you helped me I'll give you a discount." This seems to be his way of thanking you.
"Thanks, Mammon I will definitely use this sometime. Have a nice day." You give him a pleasant smile, which seems to surprise Mammon.
"Thanks, same to you. See ya." Mammon blushes a bit.
"Goodbye." You get out of the car and go straight to the café.
With a big smile, you open the door.
Only Beel is there right now. "Welcome, you solved the case I guess?" He smiles at you.
"Yeah, and I got a big payment. Now I won't have to worry about rent for a while." You show off the bundle of cash to Beel.
"Great. I will give the rent to Belphie later." Beel nods with approval.
"Is he taking a nap?" You shake your head and look at the cake options.
"Yeah, he worked hard today." Then Beel’s stomach starts to rumble.
"Sounds like you need a break too. Want me to take over for a bit?" You know Beel doesn't get to take a break that often.
"I only need to eat, and you paid rent, so you don't need to work now." Beel is reluctant.
"Don't be silly, we are friends. You helped me out so much by letting me work here. It's only for a bit anyway. You can pay me with some cake today." You glance at the delicious selection.
"It's a deal then. I'll be in the back if you need me." Beel instantly agrees and you take over for him.
This case was a pretty big success. Pretty pleased with yourself you take care of the café until Beel comes back.
#obey me#obey me fanfic#detective mc au#72 investigations#omswd#obey me shall we date#obey me one master to rule them all
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Reading One Piece pt 243: New Arc But No Ace???
Chapter 490
Thoughts:
- Fpos/cs: Giants from Enies Lobby/Water 7 are going back to their home island! Good for them!
- Straw Hats are sailing off too. Lots of waving and goodbyes :) Chopper, that’s dangerous, get off that railing, you can’t swim (I really like Sanji’s shirt, it looks so comfy)
- “Thanks for the sun!” :D
- Oh? Narrator is telling some spooky story about Florian’s Triangle
- But before I’ll start typing all of it for no reason, let’s figure out what I know about the arc we’re getting into.
Nothing. I know nothing. Not even the name. (I’ll give it a few chapters before I One Piece Wiki this, just because)
I mean, I saw some spoilers for what probably happens in that part of the story but it’s more of a “Ace is here, Prison Time, MIHAWK!???” type of thing. What I want to say, up to Thriller Bark I knew nothing but I felt like I was going right to the “Nothing Happened” moment in a “holding a rope” kind of way. Now I’m swimming in a soup of facts and probably-spoilers, and feeling as lost as Zoro on a straight road. I don’t even know where we are going, not for sure.
I have exactly ONE understanding here: New World is coming and it will be a complete disaster. Let’s find out in what way.
- Alright, Triangle Narration
- “Nobody knows what occurs in the mysterious sea called the “Florian Triangle”” aliens
- “Every year, 100 passing ships disappear into the depths of the mist.” You know, it’s actually weird. Grand Line is known for its inconsistency, constant weather change and different climates but Florian Triangle just. Always has mist. Whatever happens, mist everywhere. Weird
- “It has been a mystery long before the Giant Pirate ship, Thriller Bark, arrived in that sea 10 years ago.” Hm
- “It is fortunate that the white mist hangs over today, as well… concealing the sea’s bizarre face with a white veil.” Wow, ok, you have my attention
- There really IS something in that stupid fog. Something Big. Hey, Something Big, touch Hobo Pirates with your evil vibes and I’ll touch your face with my fist, thank you and goodbye
- But Straw Hats are out of the mist for good and are planning what next arc will be about
- Apparently, it won’t be about rescuing Ace???? Were my sources wrong????
- Luffy, you’re being a very little brother right now and I respect that
- Yeah, he think Ace will be fine cause that’s his adventure. It kinda makes me worry to be honest, that’s so very not like every other shounen ever it makes me nervous
- Meanwhile, LET’S HAVE A PARTY! Not everyday do you welcome a walking skeleton/musician into your crew :D
- Place change!! We’re in Holy Land!! Politics!!
- (Mark it as only time I was excited about politics ever)
- “What do you mean, they ran away!?” oho, Kuma is getting a scolding
- He takes it like a champ
- Garp is there too! Hey Grandpa
- Should I remember Sengoku’s name or…
- “Don’t tell me you took pity on a injured pirates” well, yes, but he was also super impressed by literary everything that happened, I think we can agree at that
- (he also mentioned Dragon. Who thinks Kuma’s a double agent? *raises hand*)
- (I suddenly want him to be a good guy, ignore me)
- Huh. Straw Hats will go right by Marine Headquarters, so marines will just wait for them now
- With Straw Hats again
- What the hell is Grand Line, this is ridiculous
- ‘Several days later’ “We made it…” made it where
- “We are halfway done! The Twin Capes, where we met Laboon, are on the other side of the sea and connected to this wall!” I discovered that the older I get, the less I understand geography. And One Piece maps just don’t make sense to me. We’re halfway, cool, don’t tell me anything else
- Oh wow
- They’re at the Red Line
- Wow
- (That’s just. A wall. A Gigantic wall. A ‘Stops clouds like nobody’s business’ wall. Wow)
- Straw Hats are so happy :D They’re remembering how they entered Grand Line (apparently Franky came from South Blue as a kid. We have a whole set, guys, all seas residents in one crew)
- I understand there’s The New World behind that wall. How will they get there?
- Zoro!
- “I must become stronger! I’m still too weak!” jezz, Zoro
- If you’re weak then what are we
- ! Luffy, Robin and Brook are in a submarine
- They’re looking for a way in of course
- Oh, they don’t know how to get to Fishman Island. Right, it’s underwater
- Sea monster
- ??? It spit something out when Luffy punched it
- Woooo A mermaid! And a friend!
- Sanji is so happy :D
- The mermaid is named Camie! That’s the same mermaid we saw in fpos/cs long, long ago!
- ahahahahaha
Ahahaha, so much confusion in that last panel :D
rOP 242 rOP 244
#one piece#one piece speed read#new arc new me#if you can't tell not rescuing Ace suprised me#chapter 490#one piece chapter 490#490#spoilers#spoiler#have a nice day#rOP 243
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