#oh.. tumblr has changed so much since i last came back

[att4boy]

some thoughts

i was reminded of this blog bc i was watching mina le's lovely video on subcultures and aesthetics, and rmbed the times i came on here and reblogged all these art hoe (or whatever) photos with the #aesthetic tag, and tried to make my blog look all cohesive and pretty as well. i was 13 when i first started this blog - in fact i started it the day after i turned 13, if i'm not wrong? just a few days after... - and now i'm turning 21, and still thinking about this place. i joined tumblr bc all my friends were on it and it seemed like such a cool place. now all the friends (irl and not) i used to have here are gone.

(are any of you still here? let me know...)

i've been thinking about my relationship with the internet recently, inspired mainly by chia amisola (among many others on twitter). when i was younger i was so careless with what i posted. not using careless in a bad way, btw. i mean careless as in unself-conscious, careless as in happy to chat with anyone who happened to be around. when i had just started elementary school my sister helped me set up a blog where i happily posted about my day (i went to kfc today!), and then in p3 i tried to set up a blog to document my family (though it never materialised in the end; i think my mum heard about it and discouraged me from doing it, though i truly don't rmb much anymore). and when i got instagram i started a transparents account (those overlays to put on pictures that everyone was rly into back then) on instagram that got almost 1k followers, i had (have - it's still available online, though we haven't posted since 2016) a book fandom account with three of my friends where we posted our little fanedits of books like divergent and hunger games and twilight. i remember briefly chatting in the comments to some guy a year or two older whose username referenced mockingjay about singapore and school... making a transparent for this ? influencer ? my age ?? that i thought was rly cool... and then something changed, i'm not sure what. i think i became more conscious not of data privacy and security and whatnot, but of how hostile the internet could be when you had a "bad" opinion. i was finding my way into the parts of the internet that discussed feminism, intersectionality, lgbtq+ rights, etc... and don't get me wrong, i think those are all excellent movements that i'm proud to be part of, but i think i also stumbled into areas where accidentally being insensitive or uninformed was very harshly criticised and looked down upon. and i think, probably, i was already the sort of person to naturally be a bit more worried and anxious about doing the "right thing" - i was always the goody-two-shoes in class, still am today to some extent. so the internet changed around me and i came to know it as somewhere where i shouldn't ask too many questions, where i shouldn't criticise.

but then i've been reading about other people's experiences on the internet - how they grew up and built their entire worldview there, made friends across the globe and changed the trajectory of their lives because of it... and i am of course remembering my younger days of freedom of the internet. i miss that era! i wonder how different i would be if i had walked further into this space and talked more. now all i do is lurk on twitter with a private account, ghost cool people trying to follow me back, dream about replying to posts and weaving a friendship from nothingness... i am definitely romanticising, to some extent, but i don't think my version of the internet back then (/ now) is wholly accurate either. i am imagining a version of myself with more confidence and curiosity, and i am wondering if i can still spin that version into existence.

i guess this post is an attempt at that? the last time i came here to talk abt something and then i ended up moving that into a private google doc. but it feels appropriate for me to post about coming back onto / into the internet on tumblr, where i have "been" for years and years. i've been thinking about starting a blog, or a public twitter, or maybe (this one just came to mind) restarting a tumblr and seeing where things go. i don't know if i'll keep it up... but wouldn't it be nice to try?

[kyri45]

✨ShadowPeach Bio Parents Bio AU Q&A! 21/11✨

Welcome to the Q&A! A space where I can answer related or similar question about the Shadowpeach Bio Parents AU! If you submitted your ask anonimously, then you’ll have to check the whole post if it’s answered here, if it’s not, worry not! Your asks might have been used for a future comic or just in the queue~

Anonimo ha chiesto: Hi! Would Macaque kidnap Wukong again? I read your comic, the last page, where Macaque is the kidnapping expert. And I'm very curious about it. Anyway, I love your comics! You are awesome.

Haha I don't think they really need it unless they want to do a "traditional wedding courtnapping" but it would be pretty odd since they kind of already live togehter.

Anonimo ha chiesto: I know this is definitely a LONG ways away, but, imagine: Wukong and Macaque playing the newlyweds game. What questions? What answers? Who’s asking the questions? Who’s getting the most right?

I wont list all the lesson but I think Macaque would get most of them right just because Wukong never really changed a lot during the years, while Macaque went through different stages of his life, and and he has new hobbies and tastes.

Anonimo ha chiesto: Will mk have a nightmare about LBD? If yes Then we will have some angst with fluffy monkeys family moments!!!

Oh he has. He has many. Most of them he has while he is at pigsy's.

Anonimo ha chiesto: Can you please shows up a flashback backstory on how MK/Wukong discovered/found out/came out as trans?? 🙏🙏🙏 Banana sundae with chocolate sauce, rainbow sprinkles, THREE cherries, and a super-deluxe one-and-only Monkie King™️ collectible spoon???

Anonimo ha chiesto: will we see any past Shadowpeach?? I’m interested to see how you frame their dynamic back 5en.

Hahah maybe in the future, I'll see

Anonimo ha chiesto: Can we get Wukong telling dad jokes? Please, I’m begging i want to see MK laughing and Macaque just being so disappointed with Wukong yet so smitten. I want to see more Monkey family domestic blissss. 🙏🙏🙏🙏

I don't have my dad jokes book here but man give Macaque an award for the patience he has with these two children

@goofybearclown ha chiesto: Hi :3 Just wanted to say I love your shadowpeach and cotl AU!!! I didn't notice you made both at first but when I did I was like "waow :0". Tbh your works are in my top 3 series on Tumblr! @fenikzia ha chiesto: I love your LMK comic so much, I look forward to reading the new additions to it when they come out every other day,and reading your comic just makes my day better. Even if it hasn't updated a particular day, I make sure to go back and reread the newest part.Keep doing what you're doing and make sure to take breaks! @skye-minecraftyt-blog ha chiesto: You! I like you! Your Bio parents Lmk au always makes me extremely happy and I regularly reread it. ((o(^∇^)o)) Just wanted to say it @blazeandsilver ha chiesto: Hello, I just wanted to say your artwork is absolutely stunning, it makes my day whenever I see that you posted something new to the BioParents comic. Please keep up the good work and be sure to take some time for yourself, you’re important too.

AWWWWWW THANK YOU FOR ALL THE LOVE!!

Anonimo ha chiesto: Hihi shadowpeach au question: You mentioned in the latest comic that Mac is more lean and skinny than Wukong. Will we ever see the full extent of that?? ALSO I ADORE YOUR ART OMG ❤️❤️

A fully naked Macaque you say? Maybe.... who knows....

Anonimo ha chiesto: I come to defend Wukong acting like a man looking at a victorian lady ankles, he hasn’t seen his (ex) husband’s fur in centuries. And he probably hasn’t socialize in years either besides MK and the gang. Romantically he is stunned right? I doubt he has even looked at anyone besides Macaque anyways…

Honestly I like to think that Macaque was the only being in all the universe that was eer able to make him flustered

@mochalikesdrawing ha chiesto: So I got a question, will we ever get to see kaiju MK again?

I have a scene post AU I would like to draw. Maybe.

Anonimo ha chiesto: Ignoring all the angst because it is crushing my soul /pos, I'm lowkey convinced that Macaque knows Wukong feels some kind of way about him because he can hear his heartbeat go crazy at certain moments and isn't dumb, but just isn't calling Wukong on it because he's still trying to sort his own feelings first. BUT ONCE HE DOES OH BOY-

Hahah Macaque knows perfectly well Wukong is down for him. In the meantime Wukong is alwasy afraid he's just imagining things bc he's dense af.

Anonimo ha chiesto: Do you think Wukong and macaque would be cuddling and macaque would be watching something scary and Wukong would be trying to not pay attention to it because he hates scary stuff or would it be the other way around?

yess

@ep2nd ha chiesto: In your shadowpeach bio parents au, if MK and Wukong were created by Nuwa, with Nuwa using Macaque and Wukong as a base, has anyone wondered who created Macaque? And does Macaque himself knows?

Wait Nuwa created Wukong? If that's so I think then all the 5 monkeys were made by her, for some reason.

@boonalina ha chiesto: Sooo what exactly is the courtnapping process like? Is it just a simple "I'm gonna pick you up and carry you away" or is it an entire ceremony? Does someone have to lure the person into place? For example, Mei bringing Redson over to a secluded spot so that Mk can "courtnap" him? (Side note: I've been in this fandom for around two years now, and this comic is what made me find out about courtnapping lol)

I "think" anything that can be counted as like a sneak attack that takes them out of guard and brings them to the designated courtnapped room can be considered as courtnapping technically.

Anonimo ha chiesto: ... Hey so your shadow peach bio parent AU is better way better than season five. WOAH, WHO SAID THAT!! (no but seriously it is like a sitcom I tune on ever so often. Much love 🫶)

Haha thank you! That's a HUGE statement!

Anonimo ha chiesto: I wonder if MK has any unique attributes/abilities as a living mass of celestial material?

He's such a cocktail ofdifferent energies I wouldn't be surprised he is able to glow in the dark.

@cjtuy ha chiesto: I do have a question it's mainly about pigsy and tang when and how long have they been together as a couple and did both of them find mk are they married ?

They have been together for almost a year, but I don't think they are married, but maybe that could happen in the future??? But yeah MK found out a little after season 5 that they are together, that was also the same time he started calling Tang "Papa"

Anonimo ha chiesto: Has macaque added any personal items to the house? Like is he moved in? Have Wukong and macaque improved or changed anything else besides making the bed bigger?

Yes he did! Half of his belongins are in FFM, althought he's a little more minimalistic than Wukong. He also have been bothering Wukong to death so that he can finally organize his stuff (and they were roomates

Anonimo ha chiesto: I feel like if they were to play Minecraft or something macaque would be the base mom. He would be the only one to remember to farm food to not starve. The others would probably forget all the time that hunger is a thing in game. Wukong or Mk: oh dang does anyone have food I'm starving Macaque: (always brings extra for this reason) "sighs" yes

AH!

Anonimo ha chiesto: Remember the Minor Scale episode, from season 2? Where MK learn how to shrink himself? And there’s also the final episode of that season where MK just grow very big to try to fight LBD. I just love that part of his power and I have seen very little people showing it. Like, sometimes that power can show up when the poor boy is experiencing overwhelming emotions that can’t be contained anymore, or pure exhaustion. For example, Having many responsibility can lead to a lot of stress and exhaustion and at some point MK just can’t do more and just become tiny, not able to do more. On the opposite, maybe he experience trauma again through a nightmare (like about azure for example) and the emotional burden is to much and he just becomes big because of that. You see my vision? I love sizeshifting base on emotions :)

Aww and i love emotion-based powers, they are just so easy to play around.

Anonimo ha chiesto: Tbh the show should let macaque have a motorcycle. Wukong gets to be passenger princess

Yesss

Anonimo ha chiesto: as we get into the colder months i like to imagine MK’s first winter coat and he’s all super fluffy and warm

Cool for the monkey parents, bad for pigsy and all the hair in the restaurant from sheeding.

Anonimo ha chiesto: I think it would be so funny if MKs rock hadn't been cracked and he'd been raised on FFM by wukong. If the same thing happens in the show macaque planning to take mks powers thinking he's just Wukongs student but then while macaque and MK are training. Since macaque is so close he notices his ears. (Being raised by a monkey he gets his form sooner) suddenly putting everything on hold busting into FFM and is like WUKONG WTF

There's a fic on AO3 about it it's A Son of Two Dads

@cheese-hommo ha chiesto: Hii, fiesta I want to say I love how you draw and everything, it just looks so cool and beautiful. Now, with the last chapter of Monkey parents Au and so, with the acknowledgement of the demon etiquette and else, DBK and Wukong really misunderstand the comfort scene for a confession? Or something more? It was just so funny seeing the two of them getting so embarrassed at the end 🙂‍↕️

Ah, 2 young demons in their true forms so close to each other, blushing? Scandalous.

Anonimo ha chiesto: I've seen Mk is his Lego merch- he gots a tooth gap- so does this MK have one or did he get it filled?

Wait that was a tooth gap??? I though it was like, a detail of the smile

Anonimo ha chiesto: 🎤 what is your official (if any) opinion on Ink MK? (as a character, plot device, literary parallel, what have you)

It's ok. I personally believe "shadow" version of one character with their own fears and doubts is a clique a little bit too much used. But they give a lot of angst.

Anonimo ha chiesto: Thoughts on Macaque knowing either Japanese or Korean due to him liking anime.

I'll give you one better. Macaque always traveled to Japan pretty frequently during the centuries. Then became a weeb

Anonimo ha chiesto: Maybe it's just me but Wukong looks a bit thicker each time, is it because his fur's thickening or is he getting chubbier ??????? Anyway luv ur art

Both.

[seneon]

ESCORT ──── shinji hirako x fem! reader. ib chase atlantic's escort. fluff + mentions of alcohol. wc of 600+

thinking about captain shinji hirako who would most definitely bribe or pay or do whatever it takes just to have you in the fifth division. he'd be so desperate about it, even go on his knees just to recruit you into the squad that he takes charge of. and for what reason?

the mere sole reason that you miraculously stole the heart of the captain while he came down to shin’o academy to demonstrate kenjutsu for the students. you just so happened to be one of the students that the hirako had to personally teach.

as beautiful as you can be and as bright your smile can shine, it only took a few hours for the blond-haired male to fall under your spell. but you never even put a spell on him in the first place. all you did was breathe, exist, and learn as shinji teaches.

as pathetic as the man can be, he doesn't ever show it. in fact, he does the opposite. he'd go all “oh look. it's the student girl whom i taught that sucks at swordsmanship.” like bro you did not just get on your knees to beg yamamoto to put the ‘student girl’ in your division…

he wants you to work for him and be under his wing, so he watch whatever you do. even better if he's seeing you make such a drastic change and progress ever since your academy days. not that he's a weirdo captain or anything that fancies a student of his, but your ages weren't that much of a difference. in fact, shinji is the one who ended up becoming a captain at such a young and admirable age.

“i can give you love for free, y/n…” shinji said during one messy night where the word sober left his vocabulary. all on his mind are fuzzy images of you.

“trust me, sir, she'd appreciate your love one hundred percent,” a voice said as they took away the bottle of sake in their captain's hands. the man simply looked up at the figure and looked back down, snuggling his drunken face into his arms. “you're kinda... pretty.. not any more beautiful than y/n though.”

“woah sir, thanks for the compliment. i honestly agree too, she's very cute, captain.”

the hirako glared at his subordinate who's helping him get up from the table so he can finally leave the pub with some guidance from someone of his barracks. “you keep her name outta your mouth, pink!”

“it's punk, sir. not pink.”

“shut up. only y/n can tell me what's right or wrong,” shinji's head wobbled just as his division member sighed and draped his long arms around their shoulders. they were oddly smaller than the fifth division captain.

“come on, captain. time to go home. y/n wishes that you return home safely.”

the voice of his subordinate is gentle and soft, so similar to his crush’s voice. he couldn't even tell what is going on right now, but he just lets his subordinate escort him home, not really in the correct state to think of anything else. although, his squad member uttering the name y/n made him all sweets and butterflies on the inside.

after such a night, the man wakes up in a frenzy, struggling to remember whatever happened last night and however in the world he ends up in his soft comfy futon without ever remembering how he got back into his bed.

he stares at a bone china vase for a few good minutes, attempting to search and dig for anything that has been buried by the headache that he currently has. but the more he stared at the reflection of the vase, the more he caught something at the corner of his eyes.

shinji shot his head at the few bags of items that laid beside his futon, a note of instructions on the items written down. he knows this writing. he out of anyone would've recognised this immediately. it belonged to you.

then a flash of memories became visible in his vision.

“THAT WAS Y/N?!?!?”

note. requested by @imaginingbleach. tumblr murdered me on the inside when i lost your request ask... i'll write an aizen piece soon trust

© SENEON 2024 ♰ do not repost, alter, or translate.

[thatwritterbeach]

So About that Alley .3

Jason Todd x fmc

DC masterlist ALL OTHER PARTS FOUND HERE

Unedited***Also I swear Tumblr is messing up my spelling on purpose cuz everytime I re-read something I know I fixed it's wrong again

Alex: short, curvy, red hair, green eyes, redheads go through pain meds way faster than normal people to the point I personally don't even take them, it's a joke, they last 30 min at best

Summary: Alex finds out her bf is red hood, after she spills some not so great secrets to the masked man while stitching him up.

Warnings: Vaginismus* angst, sexual assault, self-harm, depression, drug use by Alex, violence, cursing, NSFW, smut, thigh riding, vaginal fingering, guided masturbation?, p in v (not overly described), pain during s*x, hiding said pain, hickeys?, self-hate, insecurities, eating disorder, weight loss

A/N: I do not own dc booho

"Hey, Jay," she asked in a totally calm totally cool manner the next morning, completely numb thanks to the nice little combo she'd whipped up. Not floating or un-present but not in pain, even where the arm of the couch was digging into her side as Jason squished into her, laying fully on top of her.

"Yes, my beloved?"

"Don't make me take away your books you little dork. I was just wondering if your family knows about you...you know, not being dead?"

"Uh, yeah, why?"

"Just if I happened to run into them I wouldn't wanna be like 'oh I'm dating Jason' and they'd be all 'wtf is wrong with this chick, he's dead' you know."

"I guess. Alex," he said grabbing her hand and pulling it to his mouth," I'm gonna introduce you, I'm not ashamed of you or whatever the hell else your mind is trying to say. My family is...overwhelming for most and I didn't want to scare you off."

"I get it dude, and since I just recently placed you as Robin you would have had to hire a family, or spill you deepest secrets to me. Lucky for you, I am the most understanding woman on the planet."

"I'd argue, but you're right. I'll text Alfred, the leader of the gang, and see when we can come for dinner. Be warned though, it could be tonight, they've been trying to get me to come home for a while now."

It was in fact that night. Alex scurried around for a clean pair of jeans, then after a glance in the mirror at her too large reflection she ripped them off and tossed them to the floor. A dress? No, that one has a tear. This skirt? No, it's too short. Jean short, they're clean but who the fuck wear jeans shorts to a mansion. Business slacks, no that says trying too hard. Ah ha, a superman t-shirt, and black leggings, then top it off with one of Jason's zip up hoodies.

"Is that what you're wearing," he asked with a laugh as he came into the room. In fact the laugh became a full blown fit and he doubled over nearly to the ground clutching his stomach and wheezing. With each second she got more and more self-conscious. Of course she couldn't wear what was basically pajamas to a fancy place, what was wrong with her. With a sigh she took off her boots and slid out of the leggings and switched them for her jeans, that she hated but whatever. Searching in vain for something that wasn't a graphic tee, or a business blouse she was half way through her closet when Jason recovered enough to notice what she was doing.

"No, put it back on, it's great, doll, I wasn't laughing at you, I was laughing with you."

"I wasn't laughing," she said without emotion.

"Hey, come 'er." Much to her wiggling protest he pulled her tight against him and placed several loud kisses along her scalp.

"Everyone else will be in pj's I solemnly swear, in fact I was just about to change into my matching flannel set, someone amazing bought it for me, but I can't remember who," he said tapping his chin with mock thought.

"Really?"

"Cross my heart," he said, though his fingers were crossed behind his back.

"Ok," she conceded trying to get free. He held on for another minute before spinning her out away from himself and winking when she fell back onto the bed. Matching pj's in hand he headed to the bathroom, not for privacy but to send an urgant group chat explicity stating lounge clothes were to be worn.

See masterlist for more

[rasp-my-berry]

a summer glowup pt. 2 // klitz x chubby reader

ALL CHARACTERS ARE 18+

unfortunately i got really high and forgot to add in the part where they make their relationship off and got straight to the smut. additionally, it has been a significant amount of time since my last work and i wold like to apologize ahead of time if you pick up on stylistic changes in my writing. i am very out of practice and only just got in the mood to finish this work,, so quality definitely isn't what it used to be. i also haven’t completely gotten used to tumblrs format so i’m sorry this is so ugly

i also have failed to proofread as always since my keyboard thinks its funny to mess w me rn. ill most likely come back and make some tweaks eventually. i always do lol

the rest of that first day was... weird to say the least. people who wouldn't usually give you the time of day, as if you were a regular stain on the wall, suddenly had some interest in you. was it because you spent the summer out of state? because you came back with an entirely new wardrobe? because you were suddenly confident, suddenly had interesting things to say?

that's ridiculous. you refused to believe it. besides, you didn't care what they thought. all you cared about was the trio of boys and your best friend. they were the only people you wanted to spend time with. and who could blame you? you'd only known them for all of highschool up until now.

by the end of the day, you were exhausted from all the attention you had been receiving. you wondered if this was how new students and anyone regularly receiving that much attention felt. it was awful.

but finally, the end of the school day. you could leave and go home, do whatever you want- oh, right!! klitz wanted to hang out after school! suddenly you felt nervous again. not that you knew why. you'd already kissed the guy, so he knows how you feel. what's the big deal? there is no big deal.

until, of course, you saw him approaching, with eli and matt in tow. eli had a smug grin on his face and matt was snickering at something you couldn't hear. klitz looked like a wreck. sweaty, shaky, and pale. scratch that last one. he's always been that pale. poor boy hardly ever sees any sun. you'd have to change that. get some healthy color in him.

"hi guys!!" you smiled, waving as you walked over.

eli smiled and waved at you, walking over faster than the other two. he was always like this. an overexcitable puppy, you liked to call him. you were surprised he didn't pee a little bit when he first saw you earlier today. he always seemed like the type to pee when he gets excited.

"hey y/n." klitz greeted nervously, his voice shaky. he was definitely nervous for whatever you had in store for him.

you grabbed his hand and pulled him closer, using your other hand to hold his arm and keep him at your side. "hey klitzy boo~"

matt greeted you and took his spot in the small circle you four were forming. "so, what're we doing tonight?" he asked.

"oh, sorry. klitz and i are gonna be... uh.. occupied tonight-" you started before eli cut you off.

"UGHHHHHHHH!" he groaned in exasperation. "you mean to tell me, we don't get to see you for a whole summer and you're gonna spend your first night back with klitz??? i always knew you wanted to ride him like a freak, but i never thought i'd see the day you would abandon us to do it!"

you had to laugh. you had to give it to him. eli's definitely funny. a giggle passed your lips and klitz started trembling. you just sounded so angelic.

"i PROMISE we'll hang out tomorrow! i just have some lost time to make up for with klitz." you defended. "besides, i bet you guys don't even know he kissed me this morning. that kinda changes things a little bit."

"HE KISSED YOU?" matt shouted.

"WHAT DOES THAT CHANGE??" eli's shouts overlapped matt's.

you laughed. "you know what i mean, right klitz? can you explain it to them?"

he sighed, hating to have to explain this to his friends. "yea, i kissed her earlier. and it doesn't change everything but it might just mean that... yknow... we won't be spending every day together.. y/n and i are gonna want private time too."

"WHY NOT?" eli started. "yknow i wouldn't mind watching you two do a little.." he started wiggling his fingers together from both hands, trying to make a sexual gesture??

your jaw dropped and you had to contain your laughter. "oh, stop it! only way you'll be seeing that is if we decide to tease you and send a video." you rolled your eyes.

eli visibly slouched, your words distressing him. he turned to klitz, grabbing his shoulders roughly. "klitzy.... klitzy, klitzy, klitzy..."

"what, eli?" klitz hesitated, scared of what eli could possibly have in store.

"OH BABIE PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE," eli dropped to his knees, tugging on klitz's pant leg and literally sobbing at this point. tears streamed down his cheeks like a waterfall and snot was collecting on his upper lip. disgusting. " YOU GOTTA FUCK HER, BRO! FOR ME!! FOR MEEEE!! RIDE IT, SUCK IT, LICK IT, SPIT ON IT FOR MEEEEEEE!!!"

people were beginning to stare, and klitz hated having people look at him. he would say anything to get eli to stop this tantrum. "yea, whatever, dude. i'll do her raw and hard just like you would want to..."

"promise?" eli squeaked, holding out his pinky finger.

klitz sighed, putting his pinky out as well and linking it with eli's. "i promise."

you couldn't help the giggle that escaped you. you wouldn't necessarily be upset if klitz followed through with that promise...

"well, we really should get going. we wouldn't want to be late for.... yea!!" you smiled, tugging klitz's arm and trying to get him away from the boys. "we'll talk to you guys tomorrow!! fill you in on all the details, don't even worry. it'll be like you guys were there!! promise!"

matt rolled his eyes. "what if we don't WANT-"

"THANK YOU!" eli sobbed, still on his knees. he turned to matt and began hugging his legs, crying into his knees.

taking a deep breath, you hugged klitz's arm, pulling him in the direction of your house. it wasn't a long walk, and not an unfamiliar one, either. ever since you had become friends with the tripod, everybody regularly got at everybody's houses. it wasn't uncommon for you to wake up to your mom telling you the boys were waiting downstairs. it was a little silly, actually.

"so, my parents actually won't be home tonight..." you started. "they wanted to visit my grandparents, so we've got the house to ourselves! we can do whatever you want."

"whatever i want?" he gulped, that nervous feeling rising up again.

you nodded your head. "yup!" and popped the 'p' as you spoke.

he hummed in thought. "well, we could watch that movie you were telling me about last time... or do our homework."

"homework?" you raised a brow. "i am not doing that shit. i'll get to it tomorrow."

he laughed. "ok, ok. how do you feel about the movie then?"

"i like that idea!! we've got some snacks at home so we can have fun getting a whole spread out!" you smiled.

once the two of you got inside, you let klitz raid the pantry and fridge while you ran around trying to find the dvd for the movie you mentioned to him not too long ago. once you finally found it, you sang victoriously. "finally!"

running back to the living room, you paused at the base of the stairs, watching klitz for a moment. he was sitting in front of a coffee table, setting up the snacks very carefully. he sat back for a second before leaning back and turning a bag of chips just a few centimeters over. he sat back and made a motion with his hands as if to say "stay."

you didn't want to startle him, let alone make him think you're making fun, but you giggled. "oops- sorry. it doesn't have to be perfect y'know. we're probably gonna mess it up anyways."

his eyes widened at that. at first he took it the wrong way, seeing only a sexual meaning in that statement. then he realized you were right. reaching for snacks and pulling them out of the bags would only result in a messed up sequence of what he originally laid out. he felt so silly for being so easily flustered.

"you're right. i just wanted it to look nice." he stuttered.

you smiled, taking a spot on the floor to put the dvd in. "well, i appreciate the effort klitzy poo."

he smiled and sat back on the couch, clearing his throat out of nervous habit. once the dvd was in, you grabbed the remote and took a spot next to klitz, instantly snuggling up in his side. he tensed up at that, fear and nervous thoughts instantly swarming his mind.

what if he smells bad? what if you can hear how fast his heart is beating? what if you can tell how nervous he is by listening to his breathing pattern? are you as nervous as he is? it doesn't seem like it. why can't he be as relaxed as you???

the movie started and you smiled, snuggling deeper into him. "you're gonna love this!! you like romcoms right?"

"o-oh! yeah! they're popular for a reason." he laughed nervously, and you giggled at how nervous he was.

a part of you liked knowing that you made him this nervous. another part wished he could just relax around you. you knew you would never judge him or anything like that. maybe he didn't know that.

about half an hour into the movie, HALF AN HOUR, there was a sex scene. at this point, klitz had finally relaxed and rested a hand on your hip, occasionally massaging the area subconsciously, as if it was something he'd done a thousand times (which he had. when you went shopping with the boys and it was crowded, he had a habit of holding and pulling you close to him so he doesn't lose you.)

klitz was already tense as it was, but you felt the feminine urge to tease him. with your free hand, you rested it on his thigh, running your thumb over it smoothly, slowly.

you could feel his thigh tense up under your touch and heard his breath get caught in his throat. he was holding his breath, watching you carefully. were you aware of the effect you had on him? could you tell? his hands were shaking and covered in a layer of sweat.

your hand slowly started massaging his thigh, moving up, up, up. you waited for a reaction. but he was focusing so hard on the movie and trying to block out what you were doing to him. he was gonna snap if this went on any longer.

your hand finally got high enough to where he couldn't take it.

he whined and stood up instantly, is if trying to get away before he embarrassed himself. "w... we should do something!!"

"like what, klitzy?" you asked, batting your lashes. "have anything in mind?"

his breath hitched and he could feel a heat pooling in his groin. he sighed. he knew exactly what he wanted to do to you, he just didn't have the confidence to get himself there. fuck it. yolo... or whatever. "let's get freaky."

did he seriously just say that. he could've said literally anything else. he was slapping himself repeatedly in his head, cursing himself for being so damn stupid.

"okay!" you smiled, sitting up.

fuck. he didn't think that would work. you're so pretty. he just wants to worship you, make you feel good in every way possible. "wait, wait, wait- actually???"

you sighed, standing and slowly walking over to him. "klitz, i think you fail to realize just how long i've been waiting for this moment. do you have any idea how long i've been infatuated with you?"

you rested your hands on his chest, slowly sliding them down, down, down to his belt buckle. you gave it a tug and sank to your knees. he could hardly breathe, hardly think. this was actually happening. this wasn't a dream, or some fantasy he was coming up with again.

"w-wait!!" he stopped you. "not like this. i wanted to please you."

your face burned in embarrassment and you shamelessly got butterflies from that statement alone. "oh!" you giggled nervously. but if he wanted to take charge, you would let him. "what do you want me to do?" you asked, standing again.

"just sit back on the couch. make yourself comfortable." he said, lightly nudging you back.

once you were seated he walked over, dropping to his knees before you. he stared into your eyes for a moment, just taking you in. you smiled at him, suddenly a little nervous. you didn't know what to expect from him. you were rigid, sitting up straight and staring down at him.

he offered you a smile back, before looking down. he grabbed your leg, kissing your knee through the pants you were wearing. you suddenly wished you had changed into something else when you had gotten home.

he kissed the top of your bare foot, running a hand along your leg under your pant leg.

he could feel how smooth your skin was, how warm it was. he could smell your perfume. the smell lasted forever, it always had, but this time it was intoxicating. he reached up, slowly following his hands with his lips, kissing a trail from your ankle to your knee. once he reached your thighs, he paused. he looked up at you, double checking that this was what you wanted.

you nodded your head. "keep going." you mumbled, afraid your voice would fail you.

he finally unbuttoned your pants, unzipped them, and tugged them off of you carefully. he stared at the panties you were wearing for a few seconds. he'd seen those before. they were your favorite.

you used to tease him by bending over when you wore skirts and turn around and say 'oops' when you saw he was behind you. just another one of those things he wished for so long you could've done in a different setting. but teasing each other had always been the nature of your friendship.

his breath shuddered, and it left goosebumps on your thighs. his hands were on your knees, gently pushing them apart to make room for his head. you didn't fight him, but god were you nervous.

he kissed your inner thigh, taking a deep breath as he did so. he continued to kiss inward, trailing from your knee all the way up until he was right in front of your clothed pussy. he kissed right at the hem of your panties.

you suppressed a whine. "oh, get on with it already, don't tease me."

he laughed nervously before finally pulling off your underwear. he grabbed a hold of your soft hips and pulled you closer. you were now barely sitting on the couch, your weight being supported by your arms. the closer he got to your arousal, the deeper your breaths became. klitz spread your legs farther, wanting a better view of you.

he could smell you, practically taste you. he'd never admit just how horny that made him. he loved the smell, the look of it all. his cock twitched in his pants, and he had to stop himself from groaning aloud.

he started by kissing you, right above your clit. you shuddered at the feeling, scooting a little farther out. "please, klitz, just- just-"

you would've specified what you wanted but his lips latching on to your clit kind of made you lose your train of thought. you couldn't help it. you moaned instantly.  he hummed against you, dragging his tongue against your clit. reaching up, he sank two fingers into you, gently curling them upward directly onto your sweet spot.

your hands immediately found their way to his head, pulling him closer, cursing aloud all the while. "fuck- right there-"

your moans were enough to stimulate him. he loved the sounds you were making. anytime you moaned, he couldn't help but moan as well. you just sounded so hot, so needy. and knowing he was making you feel so good only urged him to do more, to do better.

you had no idea where he learned to do this. as far as you knew, he was as inexperienced as you were, not that it really mattered anyway. you were just startled.

almost desperate for breath, he pulled away. his glasses were fogged, and his hair was a little messed up.. practically the most arousing vision ever. he pressed his thumb to your clit, the two fingers inside you working their magic while you squirmed on the couch. you wrapped your legs around him, crossing your ankles where they met over his spine. you wanted to keep him as close as possible.

your arms were trembling now, beginning to buckle under your weight just a bit. you whined, the pleasure overwhelming you. you were getting close. you could feel a neediness build up in you, and you could hardly contain yourself.

"harder, faster, faster, fuck-" you panted, throwing your head back.

his free hand came up, kneading the plush of your thigh before trailing further up, under your shirt. he tenderly ran his hands over the soft skin of your stomach before finally finding your right breast. your moans deepened.

"i'm gonna cum-" you warned, your body bending to prepare for the wave of pleasure. he went right back with his mouth, removing his fingers so he could fully taste your pleasure.

he moaned against your clit, pushing you right over the edge. right as your moans turned to a scream, and you pushed his head farther into your pussy, he came as well, effectively ruining his pants.

he moaned against your clit, deeper, longer this time. the electric feel of his voice against your clit sent a shock of your spine, a small whimper leaving your lips. you panted, shocked by the overwhelming pleasure. your ears were ringing and you couldn't quite focus your eyes on anything. "klitz... i.. christ, that's the best i've ever had.."

you couldn't catch your breath for a solid minute, finally sitting up and running a hand through your hair. you noticed the spot on his pants and your hand flew to your mouth. "oh my god-"

he was still catching his breath. he pushed his still somewhat foggy glasses up, and eyes you curiously. "what is it?"

"did you..?" you paused.

he looked down and back up to you, his eyes now fearful. "i'm sorry! i know, it's, like, super pathetic and weird of me-"

"shut up, i think it's hot." you rushed. "did me feeling that good.. make you feel good?"

he nodded his head slowly.

"sick." you paused. "but are you gonna fuck me or are we leaving it at this?"

"whatever you want?" he looked up at you expectantly.

you smiled, batting your lashes at him. "i want you to ruin me. i want your dick balls deep inside me, klitzy."

his eyes widened, his jaw dropped, and his brows raised immediately. he didn't think you were capable of being so vulgar. especially in real life, compared to your texts. he gulped hard. fuck. he took a deep breath before leaning forward, pressing a kiss to the corner of your lips. he supported his weight on your bare knees, massaging and caressing the skin there.

you sighed dreamily, melting under his touch. your eyes fluttered shut and you smiled. "you don't have to treat me as if i'm fine china." you giggled.

"you're just about as precious to me." he murmured as he stood to sit beside you on the couch.

you nearly swooned aloud, the words alone giving you butterflies. you grabbed a hold of his hands, his soft, gorgeous hands, and pulled him closer to you.

you stared at each other for a moment, awkward and nervous silence settling between the two of you. you raised a hand up to his cheek, cupping it gently. he melted into your touch, sighing deeply. you leaned forward and pressed a short kiss to his lips.

he barely got the chance to kiss back before you pulled away and pressed your hand to his chest, running it along the whole of his torso, stopping at the hem of his shirt. you glance back up at him for a split second, noticing the way he's watching your hands so intensely. a smile pulls at the corners of your lips and you finally lift the shirt up and over his head, throwing it a short distance away.

once again, you ran your hands up and down his chest, feeling his heart beating rapidly beneath your fingertips. your smile widened, and you went further, further down to his belt buckle, undoing it with ease. his breath caught in his throat, nervous once again. you pull his pants down, leaving him in his boxers. you don't say anything, just scoot closer.

you hover over him, your hands on either side of his head, and press another kiss to his lips. "can i keep going?"

"please." he sighs.

you giggle a bit and finally go back to pulling off the final layer. you don't say anything but your eyes widen visibly. it's silent between the both of you for a moment, the movie filling in for your lack of words.

"is something wro-" he starts, before you cut him off.

"KLITORIS??" you shout. "WHY HAVE YOU BEEN HIDING THIS FROM ME FOR SO LONG???"

"huh-"

you scream into your hands. there's a panic in your whole body, excited to just devour his cock whole. "klitz, if i had known you had such a juicy, scrumptious, fat cock, i- UGHHHHH-"

you quickly composed yourself, taking a deep breath. when you looked back to klitz, you noticed just how red his face was. you smiled again and he began stuttering.

"um so anyways-"

"i'm gonna ride you." you said with a straight face. "and you're gonna hold me like this."

he gasped, a nervous chuckle following quickly after. "oh-! okay.."

scooting forward and putting your legs on either side of his hips, you grabbed his hands, placing them on your plush hips. his hands were trembling, and you asked again if this was what he wanted, to which he vigorously nodded his head.

you smiled, still looking down at him. his shoulders rested just above the arm rest of the couch, you were almost at perfect eye level with him. "are you gonna take your shirt off?" he asked. "you don't have to, but-"

you practically ripped your shirt off before he could even finish. he was in absolute awe of you. the illumination from the tv made you look almost angelic, looking down on him like this. you were glowing, ethereal. an angel.

his eyes trailed your body from top to bottom, admiring every inch. the way your tits sat, and your soft stomach, your amazing hips, and your thighs that had him weak in the knees. your gorgeous, wet pussy, just moments away from him. his cock twitched and it reminded him of what was about to happen.

"you ready?" you asked.

he nodded his head again, and you didn't need another second to think before slowly lowering yourself on his erection. you let out a shaky breath, looking down and watching to see how much you were taking in. klitz bit his lip, nearly moaning aloud. you were so wet, so warm. so perfect. his hands gripped your hips tighter than you expected. your breath shuddered slightly, your hands finding their place on his shoulders for support. you sank down as far as you could, finally releasing your breath once you stopped. it had hurt, just as expected, but not as bad as you anticipated. raising yourself up again, you started to build a rhythm as best you could.

your breath was unsteady, as were your legs. klitz could hardly bare it. any of it. he wanted to just grab you harder, move you to a rhythm he much more preferred. just absolutely destroy you. he whined suddenly, his fingers on your hips twitching slightly, their grip never loosening.

after a moment or so, klitz finally snapped, his grip somehow tightening. he lifted you and pulled you back down just how he wanted you to. his hips thrusted up into yours, meeting you halfway and creating harder thrusts. he moaned aloud, his breath shuddering slightly. he could barely take it. you were perfect. he felt as though you were made just for him. a perfect fit. you gasped at his sudden action, although pleasantly surprised nonetheless. but he didnt stop there, of course. he continued manipulating your movements at a rhythm he much preferred to the one you were moving to.

his moans flooded the room, louder than the movie you had put on. he was so glad he had finally plucked the courage to say something. he knew things wouldnt be the same after this, and he was perfectly okay with that. this is exactly what he's been dreaming of for years anyways.

he kept pushing and pulling, at first just quicker, but as time passed, you felt him pull you down onto him much rougher than before. you could feel his tip reaching deeper than you thought possible. you moans soon turned into slurred speech, begging him to go quicker, begging to cum.

he didnt want this to end so soon, though. still, he was kind to you, and did as asked. he helped you move quicker again, and began thrusting his hips upward, meeting you in the middle and bringing a roughness to the speed that was needed to push you over the edge.

he watched your body, the way it reacted to his movements, the way it rippled with every thrust. he thought you had never been more beautiful, your makeup smudged and smeared around your eyes from sweat and tears formed from pleasure. sweat glistened on your skin, but still.. gorgeous.

soon enough, he heard your moan get louder, and louder, louder. then he felt your body relax, your walls tightening around him, pulsing with your orgasm. it felt.. divine. klitz was in ecstasy, and he hadn't even cum yet. just watching you come undone made him feel just as good as you did in that moment. he moaned, his brows furrowed and jaw slacked open. you looked absolutely angelic when you were feeling the pinnacle of pleasure. he didn't stop there, though. he grabbed your hips and in a second you were on your stomach, ass up and all. you were nearly exhausted and completely drenched. not just sweat, but the liquid arousal between your legs. he wanted to devour you again, but first, he wanted to cum.

he lined his hips up once more, pressing the tip against your cunt. a shaky breath escaped him as he pressed further, slowly sinking deeper and deeper. once he was in as far as he could go, he released a deep moan at the same time as you. he pulled out and started working up his rhythm again. his moans grew louder and louder. you were still sensitive from your orgasm, and you could feel another rapidly approaching. you hoped klitz was as close as you so you could cum at the same time. his breath was sharp and shallow, but his movements never fell out of rhythm. you turned your head, trying to get a good view of his face. you wanted to see his face twisted in pleasure as he cums. breathy moans turned to whining as his orgasm came closer and closer. he could feel it building up inside him.

he looked down at you, taking in your figure once more. he didn't fail to notice your perfect ass, and the way it rippled in time with his thrusts. god, he thought, she really is out of my league. he couldn't stop himself. his dream girl was right in front of him and holy shit his dick is really inside her. finally, he couldn't take it anymore. he grunted, trying to catch his breath.

"god, y/n, i'm gonna cum!" he started moving faster, fucking you even deeper and harder.

you were getting close, too, the pleasure overwhelming you. tears welled in your eyes and you let out a sob as your orgasm came crashing down on you. klitz came too, your orgasm only bringing him more pleasure, just the right amount to push him over the edge. he pulled out just in time for the thick ropes of cum to shoot across your back. the both of you slumped over and took a minute to catch your breath. tears continued to stream down your face as you recovered from your intense orgasm.

once you could finally speak again, you spoke up. "fuck, klitz... i'm gonna want a lot more days like this, if you don't mind."

"anything for you." he sighed dreamily. he pulled himself up and turned to the tv as he scooched his way over to you. reaching for the remote, he pulled you closer to him. "we won't be finishing this, will we?"

humming a simple response as you shook your head, you snuggled deeper into his embrace with closed eyes. in his arms, you didn't struggle to relax. he was warm and his heartbeat was soothing. suddenly, your eyes shot open.

"we can't tell eli."

[genshingorlsrevengeance]

Major Blog Update: Inbox Cleared, Life Updates, a big thank you and More!

First of all the big one:

The deed is done...The Inbox is dead.

Long live the inbox.

To get a fresh start, I've deleted the current inbox of all my asks.

The inbox memes, the nightmares...they're finally over...

ANYWAYS, feel free to send in any request you may have as per usual, just figured I clear that damn thing finally out considering I've had asks that are three years old in there.

Right now I'm really getting into Honkai: Star Rail since Natlan kinda killed my enjoyment of Genshin, but those gals I will still love and write for (I mean, I'm sure as heck not changing the blog url) so don't feel discouraged if you came to this blog because of my Genshin content. And of course my other fandoms are still good to rock and roll!

One last thing before the cut:

I want to thank EVERY ONE of you for following this blog and sticking around with my goofy ah for so long.

I genuinely get excited to read any message or request you put under my posts or inbox, whether it be feedback or joking around! And I know we have the memes going on about me being drowned, please know I do genuinely take the time to look at every single one that comes in everyday, even if I didn't say anything or respond. And it means the world to me that ya'll like my writing enough to continue asking of me.

You all are the reason I even put the effort I do in this blog for so many years, from my newer followers to those who have followed me since my first blog. I could not ask for a better group than ya'll.

From the bottom of my heart, thanks, and let's have a great year together!

ANYWHO: For those who care enough, this is what's been going on with me for the last few months.

Work:

As for why I've been absent for a while: simply put because I work a retail job. Thankfully nothing too bad, it's just normal scheduling and it IS work I very much enjoy and get paid relatively well. My love for writing is still very strong as is my simping, so no worries, I don't plan on going anywhere.

I DO greatly apologize for making everyone wait for literally ANYTHING, doubly so if you had an ask I didn't get to yet. I wanted to honestly save everything into my drafts, but alas I could only choose some select ones.

You're more than welcome to send it back in, and since things have calmed down I SHOULD be getting to them a lot faster.

Genshin:

In regards to what I said earlier about Genshin: Natlan kind of killed any enjoyment I had playing, characters were REALLY unappealing to me, it made my friends stop playing so therefore I stopped as well as that was the major reason I still had it installed. I don't really plan on adding anyone from Natlan or anyone else from that game in the future, so apologies if you were looking forward to that from me specifically.

Star Rail has been filling the hole in my heart and honestly? I have a lot more writing freedom writing the gals from there, but again, don't feel afraid to send me any genshin request! I still simp for my Mondstadt women after all.

Other things I've been doing/Ideas for the blog:

I've also been playing games (and getting distracted) with my irl friends and trying to catch up on my hobbies to prevent myself from burning out, Minecraft has been a big thing lately for me again: specifically Pixelmon LMAO.

For 2025 though, I plan to at least post an imagine once a week starting next week since things are still settling down and I have to get my work schedule.

I might also start posting (Eventually) my personal writing projects here to get feedback and possibly go to AO3 to post my crossover series since Tumblr isn't really the place to be doing so (Chief among them my FE3H AU: House Isekai), or if demand is high enough I'll post it here.

Oh, and with this major update I have once again updated my banner, not that it's really important, just that I put a good amount of effort in it, more than you'd think for how simple it is. I also want to see if anyone even gets my reference LMAO

Once this post goes live, I plan to add a few new characters, starting with the Commander from Girls' Frontline but we'll see how it goes.

I think that's all I got for right now, so see ya soon guys!

- Chris

[baseonezero]

Maybe This Was All A Mistake - HKS

synopsis: things aren't looking so good in your relationship after 3 years of being with your bf

characters: bf!shota x fem!reader

a/n: i've never published anything on tumblr so pls bear w me as i try to figure things out 😞 also dont know when to add warnings and stuff (non-idol au btw)

everything was totally fine for the past 3 years. perfect even. so why was there so much tension between you and shota?

well you knew why; the constant arguing over stupid shit which would then snowball into bigger things. usually you guys were so good at dealing with arguments and would end with a mutual understanding.

it's gotten to the point where you're tired of shota's mixed signals. he'd distance himself from you, get angry whenever you wanted attention so when you returned the favor, suddenly he'd turn into a clingy bf.

after 5 months of ranting about the issue to your friends, they were completely over it. reasonably so. they'd always give advice and voice their opinions but you never listened.

"break up with him"

"i dont think i can give up 3 years this easily. he's been better recently."

"yeah and then hes gonna go back to being an asshole"

"we don't know that. maybe its just those situations where we have a few struggles in the relationship and everything will be better again."

"girl— oh my gosh."

maybe you were actually stupid to believe that. nothing changed. it was the same never-ending cycle. did you actually waste 3 entire years on him? 1,239 days if you want to get specific. was the time actually wasted if you were happy with him for the first two years? did the love just wear off?

you both had gone out to downtown, walking around and stopping at a cafe where you two had your first date together. you guys came here pretty often, usually happy, but today was just rather sad. shota only scrolled on his phone as you both were sat right by the large window, waiting for your drinks.

you sighed, biting the inside of your cheek as your chest began to feel heavy. you watched soul mindlessly scroll on his phone, occasionally texting. he still had the polaroid picture of you behind his phone case but you wondered why he even bothered keeping it there. or maybe he simply didn't care enough to take it out.

"order for an iced matcha latte and an iced americano!" the worker placed the two drinks over the counter to which shota looked over and then glanced at you.

"i'll get it." you pushed your chair back and went over to grab the drinks. "thank you," you forced a smile at the worker and received a nod.

you don't really know why you ordered the most basic, kind of disgusting, drink ever. you weren't in the mood to drink or eat anything. as you sat back down, you slid the green latte over to shota and he finally placed his phone down, taking the drink into his hands. "thanks."

"its been a while since we've last been here," your voice was soft but had little to no emotion to it.

"yeah, it has been." shota took a sip of his drink before moving the cup in his hand in a circular motion, probably to mix everything.

it was depressing to see him this way. he was normally very silly, making random noises or rambling on and on about things he's into. it'd be an understatement to say you missed it. maybe it's too late to get that version of haku shota back. maybe you're just not the person who can bring it out of him anymore.

you didn't realize tears had brimmed your eyes until you felt the huge lump in your throat. you shouldn't cry. not in front of him at least and definitely not in public.

shota looked up at you from his drink. he stayed quiet for a moment before finally speaking. "you okay?" he reached for your hand and interlaced your fingers together. part of you wanted to snatch your hand away but the other part wanted to feel the warmth of his hand for as long as you could — before you commit to your decision of breaking away from him.

"shota," you choked on your voice, biting your bottom lip afterwards as tears begin to finally slip down your cheeks. you looked at his face before looking down at your hands, "lets.. break up."

although you didn't see it, shota's face dropped, his mouth slightly gaped. "you.. want to break up...?" his grip on your hand loosened but he didn't let go completely.

you only nodded to his response, biting your lip to prevent any sobs from becoming audible, simultaneously trying to stop the tears to no avail.

"baby, what? why? please, let's just talk about this." shota pleaded quietly but loud enough for you to hear.

you looked back up, your eye makeup slightly ruined by the tears. you sniffled as you took your hand away from his, "shota, you know why." you fought to not let your voice crack, carefully dabbing the tears off your cheeks and from underneath your eyes with the sleeve of your shirt.

"no, i don't know why. sure we have these small moments where we're upset but that's normal. we always go back to how it used to be, do we not?" he leans over the table and cups your cheek with his hand, his sad eyes looking into your teary ones.

you think about it. maybe he is right. you might've been thinking a little irrationally.

no. this can't happen again.

you shake your head, pushing his hand away from your face and you get up from your chair. "no shota. i'm tired of feeling this way. you give me attention when you feel like you're losing me but after a while, you go back to being a dickhead." you frown, taking your drink into your hand.

he gets up as well but leaves his drink on the table. at this point a few people are staring but it doesn't matter. "please y/n. don't leave me. we can fix this."

"there's no 'we' anymore, shota. i'm sorry." you drop your head.

shota only stays quiet. he grabs his drink and tosses it into the nearby trashcan and does the same to the cup in your hand. he knows you don't even like americanos.

when you guys came in not too long ago and ordered the drinks, he was confused as to why you had bought it. it doesn't matter anyway.

he swallows the lump that had now formed in his throat, taking a deep breath before talking.

"can i at least hug you for one last time?"

your heart shatters. you look into his eyes with blurry vision due to the tears and you wrap your arms around his body.

his face meets the top of your head as his arms hug your waist, rocking both of your bodies side to side as you silently sob into his chest.

"i'm sorry i couldn't be a better boyfriend to you."

after the hug you couldn't get yourself to say goodbye to him. you simply let go and walked outside and got yourself an uber.

this is going to be a bitch to get over.

a/n: definitely not my best work but i somewhat tried whidkwkd if this is total shit lmk 😭😭 wattpad-esque ahh story omg

[the-morningstar-family]

Argh, me and tumblr are going to have a very not nice conversation. I keep only getting reminders for half the posts you're posting so I missed out on the last parts of the story. Which I found out by accident but hey better late than never.

---

And because Sera is starting to really really piss me off, here is the last message again, so that her highness may hear all of it! (And to think she considers Lucifer to be the one with a pride problem...)

Hi, yeah, thanks for landing an ear. Who am I? A friend of Lucifer's, one you can't just shut up and send back to hell so open your ears and listen!

Down there in the hotel YOUR exorcists tried to destroy is currently a little boy who is watching his mother slowly die! A strong woman who is dear to so many people and whose impending death is ripping them apart.

Lucifer can't heal her. He can't even ease her suffering because he hasn't been able to access his healing powers since he came up to Heaven to safe one of YOUR souls from suffering.

And you thought yourself just and in the right for this because she has proven herself worthy of heaven and therefore doesn't deserve to suffer.

But Willa doesn't have that possibility! She is a hell hound, she can never ascend to Heaven, she will simply cease to exist.

Heaven has brought nothing but pain and suffering to Hell.

Is that what you have become, Sera?

An agent of torment and doom?

And before you start, it doesn't matter that the exorcists didn't target Hellborn. Do you really think that they were able to live their lives like nothing was happening during your slaughter?

I was once told that Heaven was about loving gof first and foremost. And second, before all else, to love each other.

For one little boy you could be a beacon of hope and love.

You could show them Heaven's mercy and light.

One life might not seem much in the grand scheme of things, but for Willa, for her son, for her friends, it would mean all.

And for your brother as well.

I would like to add a heartfelt FUCK YOU for acting as if this was no big deal and being more focused on Lucifer's sex life than on the kid who just lost his mom.

The seraphim and king are alone now. He swallows.

Sera: “A sinner Lucifer?”

Lucifer: “Yes, so?”

Sera: “Is he pregnant?!”

The king frowns, crossing his arms.

Lucifer: “What does it matter? There's -”

Sera: “Because he's a Sinner!”

Lucifer: “Lilith is as well! What's the difference?”

Sera: “That she was the first and as responsible for this as you”

Lucifer: “Cool, but things didn't work out so-”

Sera: “So you're taking the next best sinner?”

He bites his tongue but growls. Alastor is not a maiden in need of defending, and he knows, he'd tell him to concentrate on what is actually important.

Lucifer: “Can we focus? Please just help me-”

Sera: “Lucifer, then you have to heal-”

Lucifer, teary: “I tried! I can't! I can't! Believe me I tried. Please -”

Sera made a look as if biting on something sour, she doesn't want this.

Sera: “I can't just disregard what the heaven's council decided -”

Lucifer: “Oh, but you can only tell half of them about fucking genocide -”

Sera: “You were threatening order-!”

Lucifer: “We fucking didn't!”

The room suddenly tastes like Sulphur, and between Lucifer's horns, flames appear. Seraphim's face goes steely, as if his emotions aren't important. And that hurts. Because when they were younger, something akin to children, it did matter. It felt like it was the most important thing. A deep breath. He lets his demonic appearance go and let's himself fall onto a chair.

Lucifer: “Felix just wants his mommy back, Sera. We aren't like you. There's sickness, death everywhere just like on earth. If not worse. Please”

Sera: “And if this- this soul rot keeps appearing, heaven won't look much different. It is my duty to keep heaven safe and in order.”

She's been regarding hell, and by extension him, as a threat since before Charlie's birth. What makes her think he'd try anything? What changed?

Lucifer: “Sera, I just want to help Felix and Willa. They don't deserve this. Come on, you can brag about how wholesome and rigours you are- just try”

She sighs, halfway sad, but determined with duty. Oh yeah, how heaven loves duty. All these stupid rules.

Sera: “I can't disregard the heaven counsel's orders”

He sighs. Maybe he can find some other solution?

Lucifer: “Right… if I can find a solution to the- her soul rot... somehow…?”

Sera: “Then I can try”

He's so fucking frustrated. How in the fuck is he supposed to help that winner? It's not like he didn't want to.

Lucifer: “Fuck. Okay. Alright. Where is she?”

Sera: “Theodora is downstairs-”

The king freezes. He never actually asked her name.

Lucifer: “What did you say her name is?”

The seraphim cocks her head to the side.

Sera: “Theodora”

Lucifer: “Holy fuck!”

He leaves a confused seraphim behind as he suddenly speeds downstairs.

Alastor enters the lobby and immediately makes a sharp turn to the table, putting down the tray, giving his best showman smile. He's not going to let his guard down with angels around. He takes a cup and strands up as straight as possible.

Alastor: “I hope this small selection of tea will suffice -”

Theodora, shocked: “Allie?”

Suddenly it is quiet, as the teacup shatters in the ground. He turns slowly to the source of that wonderful voice.

Alastor: “Mama?”

[seethew3stwithm3]

frost on the eaves // j. miller

hi there :)

it's been a while since i've been on tumblr, and i started completely anew with this account, so let me introduce myself. i'm clarke <3 i love to write, even though my creativity has been pretty shit for the past year. but here's a little something i jotted down while listening to phoebe bridgers' christmas music, because i love me some seasonal melancholy.

have a wonderful holiday season. and i hope this is the first fic of many.

much love,

clarke x

(gender-neutral reader. you can imagine show or game joel, it's up to you <3)

warnings: angst. a little bit of lightheartedness. the general melancholy at the end of the world. mentions of sarah.

summary: christmas always makes joel think of sarah, so you keep him company. you and joel get a re-do of your first kiss. on christmas eve.

Snow was no stranger to blood, not after all this time at the end of the world. Seasons changed, leaves fell, the sun burned, but Winter always came back around.

Blood dripped from Joel’s nose as he walked back to the house, stumbling a little in the fresh sleet. He swore to himself, an ache in his lower back becoming more apparent with every step he took, as he pulled his jacket tighter around himself.

The cold had always made his nose bleed.

Shoving through the door, he kicked the snow from his boots before leaning against the wall to unlace them. Ellie wasn’t around, or else she would’ve come bounding down the stairs to complain about the racket he’d made.

He was still getting used to not having her at his side, was still working on easing the panic that arose whenever she was out of his sight. They were in Jackson now, as safe as they’d probably ever get, but the decades of vigilance and paranoia, of never trusting anybody, would take just as much time to undo.

Ellie is fine, he reminded himself as he tugged off his boots, grunting in pain at the strain it put on his back.

Lifetimes ago, he would’ve spent tonight in front of a fireplace, wrapping gifts for a little girl whose squeals of delight still lingered faintly in the deepest trenches of his memory. Christmas had once been his favourite time of year, if only for the stupendous amount of joy it brought to Sarah.

Whether it was the glimmering strings of lights, the window displays at the mall, or the general sense of festivity, Sarah’s excitement was constant and infectious for the entire month of December. And, by God, did he miss that.

Joel didn’t let himself remember very often, for it always brought a heaviness with it that was difficult to shake. But just this once, on this cold winter’s night, he let himself recall the sound of his daughter’s laugh. Of the gleam in her eyes, the same shade as his, when she’d unwrapped the digital camera he’d bought for her when she was thirteen.

He’d blinked spots out of his vision for weeks, always caught off guard by the click and flash when Sarah had pointed the damn thing in his direction. He thought of the photo albums she’d filled with whatever provoked enough joy in a thirteen-year-old to immortalise it in a photograph, and wondered what had become of them.

They, like everything —his Sarah, the world— would, of course, be long gone.

With a long sigh, Joel rested his head against the door. In the dark of the hallway, he blinked back the sting of tears. Christmas Eve was different now, all he’d planned to do was down a glass of whiskey, a heavy pour seemed necessary tonight, and go to sleep.

If he was lucky, he’d sleep through Christmas Day altogether.

But the wood vibrated against his forehead as somebody knocked on his door. Huffing a sigh, he opened it. You were the last person he’d expected to see on his doorstep.

“Hi,” you said softly, clutching a thermos in your gloved hands, wearing a gentle smile. But that smile dipped as he stepped into the porchlight. “You’re bleeding.”

“What? Oh.” Joel wiped his nose with the back of his hand, but it was no use, the blood had dried and crusted. “It’s nothin’, come in. Just let me clean up.”

As he led you inside, he couldn’t help but think of the last time you’d graced this hall. It had been two weeks since you’d kissed him, and maybe he’d been out of his damn mind. In the days that followed, he’d made himself scarce, signing up for extra patrols despite the ache in his back. It was foolish, and he’d regretted it each night when pain had lanced up his spine, down through his knees, as he’d tried to sleep.

In the days that followed, he’d fought an internal battle. His relief at a gentle touch waged a losing war against his stubbornness, against his certainty that forging any kind of meaningful connection would only end badly. With loss or abandonment, and he’d faced too much of that. He couldn’t do it again. He just… couldn’t.

Damn him for craving the warmth of you.

“Joel?”

Your voice shook him from his thoughts, and he turned away from the sink where he’d been wiping the blood from his nose.

“Yeah?” He sniffed, relieved that he could breathe clearly now. He crossed his arms, leaning back against the counter.

“I’m sorry,” you said, gaze drifting from the window to his closed-off stance, then to the floor. “For the kiss, and everything. I… yeah.”

With a shrug, your whole demeanour changed. Softening, accommodating to the fizzling awkwardness, brushing it aside. Without ever giving Joel a chance to say anything.

“Anyway, I was going to go for a walk to look at the lights and the tree they put up by the dining hall. I made cocoa. And, well, I guess I came here to ask if you’d come with me?”

Joel nodded, clearing his throat. “Yeah, sure, okay.”

A few minutes later, once Joel had tugged his boots back on, the two of you were out in the cold. It hadn’t snowed too heavily this morning, but the ground was a little icier than usual. You had to focus on each step you took to keep from slipping. But despite your vigilance, you stumbled.

Joel’s hand shot out to grab your elbow, stabilising you in an instant, as he’d done countless times on patrol, or wandering through Jackson. Once you were sure of your footing, you gently shrugged him off, giving him space. He’d made it clear that he didn’t want you, and you weren’t about to disrespect his boundaries by selfishly lingering close.

In the square, the tree they’d set up glimmered with lights. Handmade ornaments adorned the branches, the same ones you’d watched the kids put together in the dining hall last week when you’d been on dish duty after lunch. Painted pinecones, handsewn fabric stars, little bits and bobs and scraps that sparkled and shone.

A few others wandered by, holding steaming mugs of tea, all gathered to take in this sliver of rare festivity. Bundled up in coats and beanies, their breath like clouds in front of them. It was almost like Christmas before.

Settling down on a bench, you took a sip of cocoa from the thermos you carried. Joel grunted quietly; his hands braced on his knees as he sat down beside you. When you offered him the thermos, he took it graciously.

“This is good,” he murmured as he took another few mouthfuls before handing it back.

Minutes passed in silence, and snow began to fall. Little flurries that swept through the brightly lit city centre. Kids laughed, one of them was Ellie, running by with the friends she’d made.

Then it was quiet once more, and the gathered townsfolk left one by one, until the square was empty. Just you and Joel, alone in the snow, illuminated in a dusky glow.

“You didn’t have to apologise,” Joel said after a while, his voice a low rumble. It reminded you of glowing embers, warm, but only if you were close enough. “For kissin’ me, I mean. It was… I didn’t mind.”

You shrugged, setting the thermos on the ground between your feet. “It’s alright. There’re no hard feelings, Joel. The fact that you disappeared and didn’t speak to me for days said enough. It wasn’t… I should’ve asked, before just… yeah.”

The snow picked up, the only witness to this moonlit conversation. A few flakes caught in Joel’s hair, and you found yourself staring, even though you knew you shouldn’t.

“I didn’t… I don’t…” Joel sighed, running a hand down his face, brows furrowed. “I regret avoidin’ you—”

“I already said it’s fine, really—”

“No, ‘cause it made it seem like I didn’t want you when I did,” he grit out, something akin to shame in his voice. “When I do,” he amended.

A snowflake landed on your nose, a tickle of cold that you wiped away. Your heart thudded in your chest, and though you opened your mouth, no words came out.

“And if you’d let me, I’d… I’d like to kiss you.” Joel’s voice had never sounded so gentle.

Haloed in the dim glow, gilded with a faint golden gleam, he looked… different. Different to the Joel you’d always known. His ruggedness had softened at the edges, his dark gaze fixed on you, an almost imperceptible blush upon his cheeks.

There was kindness in him, you’d always known there was, despite his stern exterior. He just wanted to get by, and you understood that, because with the world as it was now, there was no room for gentleness or peace. It was best to grit your teeth, crack your knuckles, and take everything on the offense. Or, alternatively, take the defensive approach and drive yourself mad with paranoia, watching your back with an obsessive nature that slowly chipped away at your health.

Joel had found a sort of balance between the two, and kept his kindness hidden away, stamped down by the years of survival. He was a faded photograph of passing time, with the smattering of grey in his hair, the lines on his forehead and the wrinkles by his eyes, the calluses on his hands and the scars on his knuckles.

It was as though the entire universe, whatever was left of it, weighed on his broad shoulders. And maybe it did. These days, everybody had a cross to bear, memories they’d rather forget.

But if this moment, whatever it was, could ease that ache in him, in you, even if just for a second… You’d take that chance. You’d spent a long time waiting for it.

“Okay,” you whispered, nodding slowly.

His hand came up to cup your cheek as he leaned in, and you were startled by the impulse that bloomed in your chest. The desire to just surrender. To take a moment of respite, alone here in his arms.

He tasted of hot cocoa and mint, and his lips were a little chapped from the cold. But the warmth that seeped into you was a pleasant embrace. And he kissed you like he’d done it a million times before, with a sort of assurance that only accompanied truly knowing somebody.

His tongue swiped at the seam of your lips, and you pulled away. There was still time, you didn’t want to rush this. Whatever it might become.

“Merry Christmas, Joel,” you whispered into the silence, your forehead resting against his. Your eyes were shut, and you could feel the featherlight weight of snowflakes as they landed on your lashes.

“Merry Christmas.”

-----------------------

thanks for reading! i hope to be posting frequently, so if there's anything you'd like to read, send it in and i'll give it my best shot.

[yangjungwonisms]

Hi all! This is a repost because tumblr messed up the format and cut some of the words off :((( hopefully this works better lol

A curious case of falling in love- PT 1

MDNI 18+

“Do you think about me when I’m not here”?You weren’t sure how you had gotten yourself into this situation. It started as an innocent conversation yet somehow here you were being metaphorically backed into the wall with no chance at getting out of this unscathed. You and Jake weren’t dating you’d never even kissed but you wanted to. You’d been friends for awhile but when it was just the two of you he always shamelessly flirted with you. You never thought much of it until recently. He’d started getting touchier with you, not that you minded but you weren’t sure where it was coming from. However now that you thought about it the last few times he’d been over at your place you felt a change between the two of you. The question came out of nowhere. At least you thought it had. Jake was going on about missing you since you’d been out of town for the last few weeks. The minute he’d gotten to your place he pulled you into a hug and kissed the top of your head. He’d talked you into staying in for the night to watch a movie and order out. After dinner you were laying in his lap while he played with your hair. You had felt the atmosphere shift slightly but didn’t think he’d ask you anything like that.

Once he had asked you that you felt your cheeks heat up and you refused to meet his gaze. “Do you think about me when I’m not here”? “Why are you asking me that, of course I miss you when you’re not here”. “That isn’t what I asked you pretty”. “Well I don’t know what you mean then”. “You’re avoiding the question”. “So what if I am it doesn’t matter”. “Do you wanna know if I think about you when you’re not around”? His question was met with silence. He pauses for a second waiting to see if you’ll answer him before continuing. “I think about you all the time, probably more than is appropriate”.

You sat up to look at him and noticed he was blushing. He’d never done that in front of you before. “Jake, where are you going with this?” “You know I like you right? Like you know I have feelings for you”? “Well, I kind of had an inkling, but no not officially”. “Okay, so how do you feel about me”? “I like you just fine Jake”. “That doesn’t answer my question baby”. “Baby” he’d never called you that before. You have to look away from him quick to avoid any kind of reaction on your end. Instead, he reached out to touch you slowly pulling your face so you meet his gaze. “Do you feel the same as me? Please I need to know, because I’m crazy about you and I want you to be mine but I need to know if I’m wasting my time”. Very quietly you squeak out “yes”. “Pardon me? I don’t believe I heard you”. “I do feel the same as you”. The way his face lit up you’d have thought he was a kid opening Christmas presents.

You weren’t sure what came over you, maybe it was all of the tension that has been building between you two or maybe it was how sexy he looked sitting in front of you with a slight pout present on his lips. Either way, you grabbed him and kissed him without giving it any further thought. You swore there were fireworks going off in the background when your lips finally met. However, this moment had been in the making for over a year now. How did he know how to kiss so well? Never mind you thought, you’d rather not think about it right now. After several minutes you were enveloped in a full blown makeout session with Jake. Suddenly he pulled away and said “But you didn’t answer my question”. “Which one”? “The one where I asked if you thought about me when I’m not around”. “Oh, that one. Yes I do”. “What do you think about”? Oh, this isn’t where you thought that would be going. “Just regular things Jake, I don’t know”. “Do you wanna know what I think about when you’re not around or would you rather know what I do when I think about you”? “Yes” you said rather breathlessly. “Yes to what baby”? “I wanna know what you do when you think about me”. He leaned in closer to you making direct eye contact and then said “Well it depends on what I’m thinking. See sometimes I just think about you and how beautiful and sweet you are. But most of the time I think about you, your body, and how unbelievably sexy you are. I think about those tight little shorts I’ve seen you wear around the house. I know you think I don’t notice you wear them only for me but I do”.

Trying to hang onto some semblance of sanity you stay silent willing your body to calm down but you just couldn’t help yourself “But you didn’t tell me what you do when you think about me”. “You’re right I didn’t, my mistake. You see baby, when I think about all of those things I just mentioned I get unbelievably turned on. Kind of like right now”. You didn’t miss the look in his eyes when you started to speak “What do you do when you get turned on”? “Do you want to hear me say it, or would you rather I show you”? You were frozen in contemplation, taking a little bit more time to answer than Jake would’ve preferred “clocks ticking baby”. You quickly mutter out “I want to hear it”.

You saw his gaze darken before continuing “Something I failed to mention before is that when I get unbelievably turned on I also happen to get unbelievably hard”. He paused for too long, every cell in your body was screaming for him to keep going. Clearing his throat he continued “you know, I’m surprised you’ve never noticed how hard I get around you”. You did notice, in fact, it was what you thought about in the middle of the night when you couldn’t sleep. He started to move closer to you at this point. “Have you ever gotten yourself off with me in the next room”? Call it morbid curiosity but you had to know. You needed to know. He had been slowly inching towards you now so close to you now that he was enveloping your senses. “I think you already know the answer to that”. You were starting to get worked up now but you couldn’t play this game of cat and mouse anymore you needed him. “Okay, have you ever gotten off while you were talking to me on the phone”? “Oh baby, more times than I’m proud of”. Your breath got caught in your throat he knew he had you. He looked at you expectantly “your turn”. “Have you ever touched yourself while thinking about me?”

You had the answer to his question you just didn’t know how to say it. You looked away from him but he was too quick and grabbed your face to look at him. “Jake, I can’t say it”. “It’s okay baby you can do it” he’s quick to add. He grabbed your hand pulling you into his lap. Finally you dared yourself to answer him “Yes, all the time”. Cocking his head to the side he says “Oh yeah?” He looked at you so sweetly but you knew better than to trust that smile. Suddenly he flipped you around on the couch now hovering over you.

You couldn’t take the tension anymore you needed him. There were so many things you wanted to do but kissing him was priority. After a few rather heated kisses he pulls off of your lips and starts to leave little kisses down your neck. He took the opportunity to grind his hips into yours earning a groan from the both of you. “Do you feel how much I need you baby?” You couldn’t think anymore “do it again”. He whined when you said that immediately starting to rut his hips into yours. You often thought about how his body would feel on top of yours and the real thing surpassed all of your expectations. You hadn’t realized how desperate he actually was until his thrusts sped up now rutting into you shamelessly. You were sure that you were soaking in your panties by now. You stopped him for a second moving to pull your shorts down so you were left in your panties. You pulled him back into you encouraging him to move his hips again. With one less layer of clothing in the way you were able to feel his hard cock rub against your clit just the right way getting just enough friction from his sweats. “fuck pretty baby is all hard for me huh”? You somehow knew what he needed before he said it. “always so hard for you baby”. He was so sensitive that in just a matter of minutes you were coaxing him into an orgasm.You’d never seen anything more beautiful than how his face contorted in pleasure as he came. And you’d sure as hell never forget the desperate little whines he let out when he came.

You could tell he was embarrassed about cumming in his pants which is why you reached out to grab his face turning him to look at you. You softly kissed him taking the opportunity to run your fingers through his hair. “What’s wrong baby boy”? You asked him in between kisses. “just embarrassed”. He was pouting now. “You have nothing to be embarrassed about sweet boy. Do you know how sexy it was that you were so desperate for me like that”. You almost didn’t catch the “do you mean that”? You started to press chaste kisses down his neck “of course I do my pretty boy”. He pulled back excited asking “I’m yours?” You simply nodded your head before adding “and I’m yours” before pulling him in for another kiss.

[howly]

do you ever worry you're too old to be a fangirl? idk someone i know said i should outgrow my interest in twilight and it made me feel sad.

short answer? no. but i thought for a while what my long answer would be. here goes:

ever since 2009, i've always been the only person from my friend group who's ever felt so intensely about twilight. i've also been mocked about liking the series since i was 13. so why should i feel any different about my love for it at 27, when i'm still the biggest twihard in my social circle, and considering i keep it down to making text posts on tumblr or reddit and gushing in front of my closest friends?

also, back in the day when, let's say, i was at an acceptable age to be a fangirl, and when the movie hype was in full force (i.e. while i was on tumblr in 2010-2012), nobody in the twilight fandom seemed to care about twilight itself and it was all about the cast, and specifically - i get war flashbacks as i type this - robsten. oof.

additionally in 2013 i stepped away from the fandom and from twilight in general, and that lasted 7 years. but then the first lockdown happened, then youtube started recommending me synthetic rose's videos, then midnight sun was announced. and it was like a dam broke. it was a time of big changes in my personal life, and for the first time in 7 years i jumped into my old feels for twilight and found so much comfort. i went to reddit, i came back to tumblr, i was amazed by how many people are here to talk about twilight's characters again - and not the movie cast, but the characters and all their feral decision-making!

the fanbase had aged and matured, and was drawn back in by nostalgia just like i was. my own skills for articulating myself, analyzing and critiquing had improved so much since i was 15 and participating in online discussions was so much more fulfilling. so i found myself sticking around for 4 years now, and doing so makes me genuinely happy.

and lastly, we're in that good moment of pop culture where everyone has an "oh, twilight is cool again!" kinda tongue-in-cheek demeanor. so even if i slip up and get a little bit insane about twilight on main, oh i'm just going along with the trend. it's hoa hoa hoa szn.

and that's why i don't think that, being a grown woman with a fully developed brain, i should have any issues with being judged for my love for twilight. it's my little island of comfort and brings me too much joy to bother beating myself up over it.

[astramachina]

an update of sorts

hi, yes, hello! it is i, tumblr user astramachina who was been relatively MIA for the past month or so. life has been a bit much so i stepped away from social media and tbh i don't think that's gonna be changing much going forward. whenever i do hop on it's usually on my alt blog and it's mostly to just vent so none of y'all are missing out on much.

HOWEVER. ON THE TOPIC OF WRITING. a couple of updates:

an indie pub put out a submission call for a collection of short horror stories from a single BIPOC author to be published in 2026 and my ass went "oh heck, that's me, i can do that!" only to realize that

I only had 6k words of well polished work

The other 10k were hot fucking garbage

oh fuck oh no even if i do clean up what i have on hand i'd still be 24k words under the minimum word count.

so i did what any sane, well-rounded author would do in my shoes.

i scrapped it all and started from scratch. :( 40k words across multiple short stories. in four weeks. (deadline is "mid february")

i've done nano before and 50k in 30 days is usually a breeze when it's just a single story that i approach with a detailed outline. this was 30 days to create, outline, write, and edit multiple pieces.

i don't have particularly high hopes of making the cut considering i know for a fact i will not have the time to sharpen these stories 110% but i'm doing it anyway. if the publication goes "ew, what" and hits the reject button, i'll be sitting on 40k (if not more) words of juicy, spectacular short stories to do with as i please.

this is getting long so everything else is going under a cut (there's CHARTS down there) ↓↓↓

to end with a raw 40k by feb 5, giving me about ten days to edit, i'll have to deliver a little under 1.5k a day. which is a great minimum HOWEVER.

my hubris is going "i can finish by the 2nd if i write 2k a day" so that's what's been happening there. my brain is fried. exhausted. my eyes are killing me BUT it was been a great distraction from the fuckass dumpster fire that is the world right now.

last night i briefly talked about these stories as a whole over on my alt, and came to the decision that while they're all standalone pieces, they all happen within the same "universe". that universe being the TSP universe.

it's something i've been wanting to do since i first started writing because i thought it'd be cool or whatever, but back then i only wrote fanfic so it was a little hard to do. (kinda doing it with my ongoing fnaf series anyway but that's different) i like the idea of having TSP be a sandbox, a sort of "Goosebumps" but for grownups. not all of it is horror, some of it can be considered "new weird", but it's all certainly uncanny.

if you want a rough list of the stories:

green means it's 100% completed, down to edits.

yellow means fully written but not edited.

pale red means currently being written.

dark red means not even outlined yet (and might not even make the cut of getting ready for this round).

so as you can see. i seriously have my work cut out for me. once these are done i'm probs going to take a more serious break from writing because the last thing i want to do now is burn myself out. i seriously started this year with the intention of working on the mainline TSP story with Cy and the gang, but alas. hubris consumes me.

what happens if i don't get selected for publication? i don't know. some of these are a little too extreme for casual anthologies, and Monitor Screen keeps screaming at me that it wants to be longer. it's already almost too long for a short story at around 7k, and if i let it fester it would absolutely push into novelette or novella territory. so who knows.

i would love to like self-pub the collection if it does get rejected, but i'd do it a bit more professionally than my ongoing self-pub works. like run a kickstarter or something because i would adore to have some illustrations to go with it as well as actual physical copies.

so yeah.

on a more general note, DHTM (my folk horror novel) is still in the trenches tho i do have two agents currently going back and forth and i'm trying to be real chill about it (one one of them is a big shot and the other formerly worked on supernatural which is fucking crazy to me).

i'm also on bluesky... kind of. at least my "authorsona". i've been self-pub'ing my erohorror and people seem to like it over there and i've been, GASP, actually making sales on itch to the point where i was able to preemptively purchase some HRT supplies, so that's nice. my limited online time has to go towards fucking marketing myself and shit (tho i've met some very nice authors so it's not ALL bad). i'm not linking to it because i want to put down a clear-ish line between.... idfk. i don't want to use my government name anywhere so instead i've splintered my internet existences. mitch miller [fandom/unfiction creator/gen online existence name] versus [authorsona name]. SIGH.

if you do want to follow me over there, shoot me a message. like i'm not TOO bothered/worried about it but i feel like going forward, as a trans POC author, anonymity is the best way to go.

so yes. hello. handing you a cookie. you're amazing if you've read this far. please take care and don't forget to hydrate.

ps. i felt like i was getting too annoying with my fnaf posting on main so i just stopped orz. i know it's my blog and i do what i want but it kinda felt bad to be almost at 2k followers and peeps only ever interacting with gen shitposts while i yelled into the void about stuff i was hype about. idk made me paranoid that people just had me blacklisted or whatever which is their god given right btw, but like. just unfollow if that's the case. slkdfjhsdf sorry it's the mental illness.

[raccoonfallsharder]

recommended works ⊹˚₊⊹˚☕︎˚⊹₊˚⊹

these are the folks who have written or drawn something (specifically within the rocket raccoon fan community) that either murdered me, resurrected me, or both.

(i am always open to recs so if you wanna link me to your fave i will be so happy to check them out)

⊹˚₊⊹˚☕︎ fanfiction ☕︎˚⊹₊˚⊹

The All of You (ao3) i fuckin love this story so hard. i love the OC. i love the writing. i love the set up. i reread this probably every month or so and pine for more. it's so fuckin good. @lazarel-3000 is a double-threat (at least) who is also on my recced artist list, which means (obviously) they are a recced creator as well.

Casino Royale (ao3) this fic by @hibatasblog (see also: Entanglement, below) is so fucking delightful. petra quill is so hot i want to date her myself, and the tension between her and rocket is through the roof. loving the angst, loving the little ways that heartbreak seeps through every new paragraph, loving the mystery of trying to figure out what happened to petra and rocket to set them on their separate paths and now bring them back together. always waiting anxiously for the next chapter.

Entanglement (ao3) this fic by @hibataao3 has me rationing my consumption in a way i have not done in a long time. i'm like "i only read one chapter a week to pace myself, as a little treat for surviving another seven days." beautiful writing and intricate storytelling, the metaphors and analogies are so good i almost wish i was back in undergrad writing a thesis on it.

Experiment: The Ravager Code (ao3) ☕︎ Experiment: The Ravager Code (tumblr) [NEW ADDITION 2024] check out author @guardian-angel12 for character art and more ♡ girl gets scooped, experimented on by the high evolutionary, saved by ravagers, and finds her family. what more could you ask for? featuring a fantastic, fascinating OC and i am in love (i do need to catch up, though). the writing is beautiful, the emotional elements are so moving, ugh i love it.

Friends (tumblr) @nyxivy is making their way through the rocketober 2023 prompts and the first fic of the series is. so drool-worthy. i've probably read it fifty times since it came out. short and so hot i could die (much like rocket himself), and somehow incredibly sweet in just the span of a few paragraphs? i will continue coming back to this fic and look forward to more from them at every chance i get.

Get Up (tumblr)@caesarhamato22 is another person on my recced creator list because trying to find just one fic to call my "favorite" is a challenge (obviously i was unsuccessful because there are two on this list). anyway this is lovely and fluffy. i die.

Heatwaves (tumblr) [NEW ADDITION 2024] oh my lord. this was written a while ago i never officially added it to the list and i should've. @mytheoristavenue writes a very sultry, steamy oneshot about you helping rocket fix the ship's climate control. i melt into my chair everytime i reread this one (which is often). so much of this lives rent-free in my head but THIS changed the course of my fantasies: Finally, he placed a paw against your cheek and whispered in close: "You're burnin' up, baby."

last (friday) night (ao3) nsfw. trying to pick a "favorite" of @aliasrocket's work is like trying to choose a favorite incarnation of rocket (i cannot). guess who is also on my recced creators list.

more than seven (tumblr)second @caesarhamato22 fic on this list and another recced creator. this one is one of my favorite comfort fics (i mean it's still sexy as hell) that i come back to very often. like it's just so wonderful and sweet and perfect and atmospheric and vibes

Professor R Raccoon or How Rocket Got His Groove Back (ao3) [NEW ADDITION 2024] nsfw. the third @hibatasblog fic on this list. this author doesn't miss. ever imagine rocket raccoon wearing his dad-glasses in a perfect slice-of-life au smut fic? by which i mean wouldn’t it be nice if someone could just fuck rocket’s brains out till his glasses fall off and he doesn’t even have to worry about blowing up living planets or killing mad titans? enter petra quill once again. this is hot, highly-communicative smut complete with both consent & shredded silk stockings, and rocket just feeling good.

Rocket Secretly Likes Being Petted (tumblr) [NEW ADDITION 2024] @whitedragoncoranth writes LOTS of fluffy lil rocket one-shots and series, but this one is my ultimate fave. rocket hacks his own software to allow himself permission to be a soft lil guy that likes being petted.

stars. (tumblr) ☕︎ stars. (ao3) sexual tension & some of the loveliest atmospheric writing i've ever consumed. another @aliasrocket fic that lives in my head.

untitled drabble/oneshot. [NEW ADDITION 2024] @hyperjorts probably never meant for their random drabble (which they mistakenly tagged as a shitpost) to live rent-free in my head for months on end but here we are. you can skip (or not skip) the original ask they were reblogging and just focus on this wonderful little bit of fiction that SCREAMS "universe-killer rocket" to me. (and then has me sweating & panting at the end)

A Very Basic Instinct (tumblr) ☕︎ A Very Basic Instinct (ao3) nsfw. when i tell you this fic did things to me. it is probably one of the fics i reread most. like, all the time jkjk only semiregularly. check out the author @elegant-fleuret for other equally brainrot-inducing smut (also mentioned in my recced creators).

⊹˚₊⊹˚☕︎ art ☕︎˚⊹₊˚⊹

@angyc0rtoons the way they draw rocket is just. the most perfect embodiment of chaos. i WISH i could draw such animated expressions so fluidly and perfectly. and their color-choices make me want to cry in the best way. it's like i actually believe in the future again. make my brain go brrrr. (this one makes all my dopamine receptors light up) (also i will go to the grave grateful and sobbing over the time they illustrated my dumb hashtags) [NEW ADDITION 2024]

@bathmob i wish. i could draw rocket. like this. the vibes are so good. the style. is perfect. i thank the universe whenever i see new art from them.

@glow-autumz is absolutely going to be a published comic artist some day and i will buy anything she works on ever. literally everything she creates has a story behind it, which i love. like, not only are her illustrations gorgeous (and like…often very hot) but every single one is (at least) a single-panel narrative. plus her OC is also cool as hell and i love her interpretations of rocket.

@happylittleshrub is a genius of the highest order. love watching all the different ways they render rocket, and i would sacrifice my LIFE for their baby rocket (raised by groot). protect them and their little rockets at all costs [NEW ADDITION 2024]

@lazarel-3000 creates the most toe-curlingly delicious art i've seen in a long time. i am seduced by pretty much everything they create. even their rough drafts have me panting. (i also have a crush on their OC and as a bi-lady i look at their art and am often like oh shit this is a fuckin feast). as mentioned before, this artist is also the author of one of my favorite fics and is a recommended creator in general.

@projectanimation7 is an amazing artist in general but i am specifically posting to share this little snuggled-up rocket and groot. glorious, magical, cuddly. 10/10. [NEW ADDITION 2024]

@rogertaylorswift i honestly don't know how this artist was not already on my rec list??? a staple and a god in the rocket fancommunity tbh. i can't pick one piece of theirs that i love more than the others. their album covers are beautiful, their meme redraws are hysterical, their one-frame comics are deeply-moving and lovely, and their longer comic arcs never fail to make me weep. [NEW ADDITION 2024]

@uglly-rodent posts always make me want to pinch the babby raccoom's cheeks and/or cry.

⊹˚₊⊹˚☕︎ creators ☕︎˚⊹₊˚⊹

@aliasrocket writes such beautiful things it is impossible to pick a favorite (i got two of their fics in the fic section and it was difficult to narrow it down that far and even now, i'm not certain). their tumblr has the added advantage of a ton of drabbles, every single one of which is perfection.

@caesarhamato22 read everything. like everything. great smut but i am a sucker for the slice of life shit and it's so fuckin good here. i just wanna be a nail tech on knowhere/locked in a closet with rocket/have him steal my t-shirt/whatever. it's like all my most domestic desires got turned into little fanfiction dreams. so much wish fulfillment i could die

@elegant-fleuret has great fanfiction (more than just the one on my fic list - i just felt like i had to narrow it down and A Very Basic Instinct literally gives me a a fresh hit of dopamine every time i reread it, which is a lot). plus also art. double-threat.

@lazarel-3000 look. look. i cannot say this enough. please go check them out they are hope in a hopeless place. some of the sexiest art + one of my very favorite fanfictions + one of my very favorite OCs have come out of this flawless individual. (full disclosure they also did some nsfw art of my OC jolie and rocket that has me crying and dying and hyperventilating on a daily basis)

@love-for-faeries-go-burrrr has another one of my favorite OCs and i am always hungry for their little storylines whenever they post.

@mrwolfhare is one of my favorite sources of gotg food-for-thought. just some of the most thoughtful explorations of the details of both the mcu and comic canon, excellent headcanons, beautiful screenshot sets, and really solid art. the drawtober art and ficlets have been highlights in my days this month and i'm told there may be a rad fanfiction on the horizon so keep your eyes on this! (rad fanfiction is here now! read Subject 880HR on ao3)

@raccoon-coded just. A+ gotg content, both original and reblogs. most recently i find myself coming back again and again to their review of various gotg novels (and adding a few to my tbr pile). [NEW ADDITION 2024]

[hlficlibrary]

HL FIC LIBRARY ✤ AUTHOR REC

AO3: phdmama 

Tumblr: @phdmama

STATS:

✤ Number of fics: 208

✤ Posting Since: 2016

TOP 5 FICS:

1️⃣ Hold My Heart {E, 14k}

“Excuse me, mate, I’m the window seat here.” The voice was soft, apologetic, and accented in something a bit unfamiliar — northern England, maybe, Harry thought.

“Oh,” Harry jumped to his feet and moved aside, “I’m sorry, I didn’t see you standing there.”

The other man laughed as he swung a bag into the overhead compartment and slid into the seat. “You were well caught up in that book, mate. What are you reading?”

Harry paused, wondering how to explain the fact that he was reading an epic and x-rated romance that was the story of a relationship between a prince and the man he’d enslaved. “Oh, you know, just some fiction my sister recommended.” He turned to look at the man and froze.

Sitting next to him was Louis Tomlinson.

Or, the one where famous Louis Tomlinson offers his hand and a lot more to his seat mate on a transatlantic flight.

(Co-written with @a-writerwrites)

2️⃣ Feels Like Coming Home {E, 60k}

The last thing Harry Styles expects when he's hanging out at the Someday Cafe in Somerville one rainy October day is for his ex, Louis Tomlinson to walk through the door, but that's exactly what happens. After a spectacularly ugly break-up three years prior, Harry hasn't heard one word from Louis, and he's moved on. Gotten over him. But having Louis back in his life, not to mention working at the restaurant where he's a chef, isn't easy, and the feelings that Harry thought he'd left turn out to be not so easily forgotten.

This is a story about love and the power of forgiveness, and how the hard choices we make define us, and change our lives.

3️⃣ On the Go {T, 2k}

From this post because I could not resist.

4️⃣ It's a Better Place (Since You Came Along) {E, 51k}

When Harry Styles, a mid-level talent, Finder, and small business owner, sets off on the vacation of a lifetime with his best friend, Niall Horan, he has no idea the changes his life will undergo over the next nine days. He's got it all planned - there's going to be shore excursions, lounging by the pool on the deck of the luxurious cruise ship, not to mention margaritas. What he does not plan for are the new friends, new bonds, or the mystery from his past that comes back to haunt him, and he certainly hasn't planned for Louis.

5️⃣ For Better and For Worse {M, 12k}

Harry and Louis have been together for 5 years and they've been getting questions when they would be getting married and start a family. Bur Harry doesn't have the time. They were arguing one morning when Harry had enough and left for work. He's a doctor and works at the a&e there is a call that there has been a bad car crash and that there is more than one patient coming in. Harry does his job good and works on the first patient and everything goes great until his next patient is Louis.

HIDDEN GEM:

💎 Unveiled {M, 65k}

The train grinds to a halt and Harry leans forward in his eagerness to take it all in. It’s a gorgeous Spring day, the sky the same intense blue that he knows from home, which comforts him. There’s much here that looks almost familiar, but then so much that is new and strange to his eyes. The bustling station platform and winding streets beyond paved in cobblestones look much like home. There are vehicles ranging from small to very large, some with strange and unusual shapes of which he can only guess the purpose. But most surprising are the people. There is a crowd gathered, filled with men and women, some in what looks to be a military uniform, some in what must be the street clothes in this Land.

There are no robes. And not a single one of them is veiled.

[akehoshimystar]

Urara SSR

#DE7DF3

Proofread by Aca (@463ce6 on X and tumblr) & Imai (Imai (@bunnyandcomet on X and tumblr)

Part 1

Ito: Well then, let's get going.

Kamiya: Yeah, thanks. I’ll leave it to you. 

Urara: ………

It’s mid-January, and the New Year atmosphere has started to fade. In place of Onda-san and Nina-san, who were dealing with a different matter, I acted as a driver to support the ST Dept. I slowly started the car.

Kamiya: Right, that reminds me. Thanks for the other day, Deputy

Ito: The other day... Ah, about Manami-san?

Urara: Ah?

Kamiya: I asked her if I could use Aporia's kitchen for your birthday.

Since you’re on cleaning duty anyway, I thought preparing the food and having the birthday party there would be more convenient.

Urara: Huh? ……What's with that?

Kamiya: In the end, the bar was booked on the day, so it wasn't possible. Sorry.

Urara: You know damn well that’s not what I mean. Why’d you go and make an arrangement assuming there’d be a birthday party?

Kamiya: Because I wanted to.  I’ve already decided on it! 

Urara: Don't just decide things on your own when it’s none of your business.

Kamiya: Anyway. Thanks for checking, Deputy.

Ito: Don’t mention it. But then, what about the birthday party?

Urara: Tch.

Hearing him clicking his tongue made me wonder if I had said something unnecessary. As I swallowed what I was going to say next, Kamiya-kun laughed and spoke instead.

Kamiya: Pardon my intrusion… Oh, am I the last one to arrive? Sorry for the wait.

Yu: It’s not time for the meeting yet, so don't worry about it.

Tomose: Urara came in early today. Though he’s normally punctual anyway.

Urara: That last part was unnecessary.

Kamiya: I see. Then, I’ll say it again.

Happy New Year, Tomose-san, Yu-san, Urara.

Tomose: Right, this is the first time we’re all gathered here this year.

After Tomose-san said, “Happy New Year," Yu-san followed suit. And as expected, Urara clicked his tongue and said, "What's so great about that?"

Kamiya: Ahaha. The year may have changed, but Urara is still Urara.

Urara: Your head is just filled with nothing but celebration bullshit, blockhead.

Kamiya: Yeah, but you deserve a celebration too, Urara.

Urara: Ah? You’ve already drilled that into my ears. Are you seriously living in La-la land?

Kamiya: For your birthday, I mean.

Urara: !

Tomose: Today’s your birthday, isn’t it? Happy birthday.

Yu: Happy birthday.

Urara: …………Stop wasting my time and start the meeting already.

Part 2

Tomose: That's all. Is there anything else?

Kamiya: Nope.

Urara: No.

Yu: Tomose, are we done with the meeting now?

Tomose: Yeah.

Urara, do you have any plans after this?

Urara: Ah? …………Me? Not really.

Tomose: I see, then we can start without any problems.

Urara: Start what? What kind of work are you…..

Tomose: Your birthday party.

Urara: ……...Excuse me?

Kamiya: I wanted to celebrate your birthday, so I decided to get these two involved. From there, we discussed and decided what to do.

Urara: Don't mess with me. Besides, the birthday bullshit was over a long time ago.

You're just running your mouth and labeling it a happy occasion or whatsoever...

Tomose: No, I don’t think it has started yet.

Kamiya: That's right, the real thing has just begun.

Yu: Then I will start preparing the meal now.

Kamiya: Oh, Yu-san. I'll help!

Urara: Oi.

Kamiya: It's fine, the star of the party just needs to sit back and wait.

Urara: Tch... What the hell is fine about that?

Even though it almost sounded like a murmur, Urara was still sitting up straight. He’s just so honest. I didn't say anything though.

Yu: I appreciate the offer, but most of the preparations are already done. 

Kamiya: Eh, really?

Urara: ……

Yu: There’re a few grilled and fried dishes that need to be done. I didn’t make them before because the flavor would be lost if I cooked them in advance.

It’s more efficient that way, was it too much?

Kamiya: No way, not at all! I’m actually grateful.

Tomose: Yu chose the menu himself, so it should be to Urara’s liking.

Urara: ….Hahh?

Tomose: Is there something bothering you, Urara?

Urara: That’s an understatement. I mean, what would you have done if I'd said I had something to do?.

Tomose: ? I don't understand what you mean by that.

Urara: I’m just saying…. Don’t get ahead of yourself and prepare a party without telling me. 

Kamiya: So... “If the birthday party couldn't be held, what would you have done with the food you prepared?”….. Is that what you want to ask?

Yu: In that case, it would have ended up being dinner for me and Tomose. I was planning to treat Kamiya to some too if he wanted.

Either way, it definitely wouldn’t have gone to waste.

Urara: ...What are you, dumbasses? You guys don't have the same taste buds as me, do you?

Kamiya: ……..

His words sounded a bit barbaric, but I somehow felt a little warmth behind them and I thought, "Ah, I see what he means." Yes, the food wouldn’t go to waste, but in the end, the selection was made based on Urara’s taste. 

Kamiya: Yeah. I'm glad we had a birthday party.

Urara: Huh? A fraud like you doesn’t deserve toany laugh.

Kamiya: Ahaha, I can't deny that.

Urara: What a whole bunch of con artists. 

Part 3

Yu: Tomose, take the finished dishes over there.

Tomose: Got it.

Kamiya: Ah, I'll help with plating. Yu-san, you’re doing the fried food now, right?

Urara: ……

Yu: Yeah, I'll leave it to you. Just arrange what's here on this large plate.

Kamiya: Okay, copy that.

Tomose: Is this portion dish okay?

Yu: Yeah.

Urara: …..Tch. Oi, give me a plate too.

Kamiya: Eh?

Urara: Hurry up.

Tomose: Here. Thanks for the help.

Urara: ...Cut that out, I’m lining up the plates, not saving the world.

With everyone's help, the birthday party was ready in no time.

Kamiya: Let's have a toast!

Tomose: Sure.

Urara: …….

Yu: Urara, it's hard to toast in that position.

Although he had a glass in his hand, it wasn’t even a millimeter off the table. No wonder Yu-san had pointed it out.

Urara: Then let’s just not do it.

In contrast to his words, he lifted his glass ever so slightly. It really was just barely, and I couldn’t help but laugh. Tomose-san, Yu-san, and I all clinked our glasses together with his. 

Kamiya: Happy birthday, Urara.

Yu & Tomose: Happy birthday.

Urara: Piss off already.

Urara: Shut your damn trap already.

Kamiya: Sorry, I just thought I should tell the Deputy what happened.

Urara: It’s 100% useless info.

Kamiya: Isn’t that all of it?

Urara: That's what I'm saying.

Ito: Anyway, I'm glad it was a good birthday party for you... Happy birthday.

Urara: …….

Ito: (...I just thought I hadn't told him yet, but maybe I did say too much...)

Urara: Tch…..

That really was a shitty meeting.

With that, Manami-san turned his face toward the window, as if to avoid Kamiya-kun. But from the glimpse of his face that I spotted through the rearview mirror, it didn't seem like he thought it was as "shitty" as his words suggested. Touched by the feelings behind that expression, I didn't say anything else and gripped the wheel again to concentrate on driving.

[crybyemissamericanpie]

Academic rivals - Coriolanus Snow x fem!reader (PT,1)

needed to put the story in 2 parts cause I wrote too much, and i cannot change first or anything, idk my tumblr is acting weird

TW: Mentions of death

Coriolanus Snow and Y/n Y/l, the top students of the academy,for years now. They didn't really hate each other,they just like a challenge, and with the hunger games coming up and both of them going to be mentors soon enough, the adrenaline just grew

Everybody is seated in the class room, the teacher calls the names out for the student then tells them their score and their grade "Coriolanus snow,99%, A as usual" The teacher says as she looks at Coriolanus with a small smile putting the paper in front of him, as she walks back she reads out"Y/n Y/l-"The teacher stops, as if she is double checking her reading"29%, F"Says the teacher, the small shock and disappointment in her voice could be heard as the students eyes light up and immediately look at y/n in silence, she puts the paper down in front of herShe looks down at it and the teacher goes on to say the other grades.

She starres at the F, with her head down the entire class until the bell rang, and Coriolanus came over to her desk as the last student left too"Didn't expect that" Coriolanus says, as he looks over her shoulder, his eyes observing her paper

They were academic rivals of course, but after all they've known each other since babies, they hid in the dark days together, and when the tests disappear they can real be friends

"So didnt i"she says, her eyes not moving from the paper, blinking a few times as her eyes feelt like it was burning a hole through the score and the grade next to it

"Is there a reason?why this was so bad?"Coriolanus asks, he knows there is no such a thing that y/n wouldn't study or didn't remember the test, he knows that something is on her mind

"The games"she says, her mind running off. She speaked her truth, no matter if Coriolanus would take adventage of her weakness, making her think about the game more so she would be humiliated at the next test again

The games, it was the 10th game of the Capitol putting kids in an arena, then watch them fight to stay alive for their own enjoyment, or 'to remember what has the districts done' at the rebellion, it was stupid

"Stressed?"he asks,Coriolanus himself didn't know what to think of the games, he thought it was smart that they used it to show power, that they are still stronger than the districts no matter what

"Scared"She replied,the only thing scary wasn't just to watch kids fight to death but that she might get attached to her tribute and what if they can't win after all its 1 vs 23 , expect if they make allies, but either a disease, thirst, hunger, poison or a tribute is gonna kill them no matter what, it was cruel

"You're too smart to be scared about that,it haven't even begun"Coriolanus point out, that makes Y/ns head turn"yeah I don't even know which kid do I have to see die" She barks at him, frustrated a bit

"And..-and what if your tribute won?"Coriolanus tries to make this more positive"still gives them trauma"She replies as her eyes stares into his, as she observes him a bit more

Was he gorgeous, she thought, he was always fine, his blonde curls, his blue eyes,kissable red lips, he could steal anyone's heart in a heartbeat, oh but was he clueless, she thought again, he was always like every capitol born, agreeing with everything the Capitol does, even when not saying it out loud she knows. But he isn't like the Capitol themselves, yet.

Coriolanus sighs giving up to fight for his own opinion and to make it a bit happier, he straightens up a bit, fixing his red uniform"I'll see you later"says Coriolanus, not even waiting for her answer, he walks out of the room, leaving her alone in the cold classroom