#oh wow angst before bedtime

[tacc0yak1]

papa, pahinga muna, ako na 🦇⚔️🐉

[the-court-of-dreams]

ONYX STORM SPOILERS

.

.

.

.

Quotes that KILLED ME in Onyx Storm

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

1)

To the ones who don’t run with the popular crowd, the ones who get caught reading under their desks, the ones who feel like they never get invited, included, or represented. Get your leathers. We have dragons to ride.

Books have always been a safe place for me. I still remember picking up The Hobbit when I was still a kid, closing my bedroom door and going on an adventure. I'm almost 25 now and I still love going on adventures. From magic schools to institutes, hidden cities to castles, forests to enormous capitals. With cars and ships and horses and broomsticks and dragons. Every story, a new adventure. Every book, a new journey. Oh, how I love travelling!

I only ever had one friend who loves reading as much as I do and our conversations about books, the hours we spend making theories, and analysing everything that happened... they are some of my most beloved moments. ( @strovilos , you are the joy of my life) My other friends don't understand as much, it's okay. I' ve always been the kid hiding books under my desk, staying up past my bedtime with a light under the covers. So yeah... that dedication really got me.

I was invited to places, but I almost never felt included while being there. That was okay too.

I always preferred riding dragons anyway.

2)

Xaden is mine. My heart, my soul, my everything. He channeled from the earth to save me, and I’ll scour the world until I find a way to save him right back.

Wow, that didn't take long at all, huh? Straight in the fucking feels.

3)

I could reach the rank of Maven, lead armies of dark wielders against everyone we care for, and watch every vein in my body turn red as I channel all the power in the Continent, and I would still love you. What I did doesn’t change that. I’m not sure anything can.

Such a good start for me and my fucking heart. Thanks, Rebecca... I really appreciate it.

4)

If I’m to be court-martialed for helping Braxtyn defend his people, then I shall welcome the trial. All who channel from dragon and gryphon alike should flourish under the wards, and now Aretia will be that haven should one of the others ever return.

Lyra... I fucking stan!

5)

So with all the love in my heart, put your fucking uniform on, because we need you.

Look, I'm not saying that Ridoc is my favourite character in this book... but... Ridoc IS my favourite character in this book.

I died with the whole squad dynamic, but the four of them will always hold a special place in my heart, I fucking love these kids.

6)

Even hundreds of miles away, he’s still taking care of me and doesn’t even know it.

I KNEW this godsdamned book would be full of angst....BUT DID IT HAVE TO BE ALL OF IT??? DID IT REBECCA????

7)

You might be angry when you realize I didn’t wake you to say goodbye. But it’s only because I no longer fully trust my ability to walk away.

—Recovered Correspondence of His Grace, Lieutenant Xaden Riorson, Sixteenth Duke of Tyrrendor, to Cadet Violet Sorrengail

FUCK ME MAN....Come on...WHYYYYYYY????

8)

But the thought of you being out there, beyond the wards, facing down a known attack of venin, triggered something in me I’ve never felt before. It was hotter than rage, and sharper than fear, and cut deeper than helplessness, all because I couldn’t get to you.

Fuck you.

9)

I would have killed anything and anyone in that moment to reach you. No exceptions. I would have channeled every ounce of power beneath my feet without hesitation if it would have landed me at your side.

Double fuck you.

10)

If I’d been there, beyond the wards, I would have drained the very earth to its core to keep you safe.

TRIPLE FUCKING FUCK YOU!!!!

11)

Pain isn’t new to me, Jack. She’s an old friend I spend most of my days with, so I don’t mind if she sings to you.

Violet Sorrengail... you are the most badass bitch to ever badass. (I feel like that's SUCH a Remi thing to say. Fucking finally.... iykyk. Shout out to @skyfallscotland for writing fucking masterpieces. Getting notifications from you always makes my day. If any of you are into fanfcition, i STRONGLY recommend reading everything this girl has written. You can start with Fear and Flame. Thank me, and HER, later.)

12)

“We live by the Codex—” I try again.

“I live by you. When have I ever given a fuck about the Codex or the Code of Conduct?” He cradles my face and leans down, resting his forehead against mine. “I am yours and you are mine, and there’s no law or rule in this world or the next that will change that.”

I love them so much it hurts.

13)

Love of my life. You have nothing to be jealous of.

😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

14)

“There’s no magic here.” He tugs me against him. “No power. No lure. No taunting reminder that I can save everyone if I just reach for it and take what’s offered. It’s only…peace.”

For the first time since fetching the luminary, I seriously debate Tecarus’s offer.

When I tell you this book was PAINFUL for me....I'M NOT FUCKING KIDDING.

15)

"...Sgaeyl…" He glances up at the trees as if he can see her in the sky above us, a look of longing on his face.

If I had a dollar for everytime this book broke my fucking heart.

16)

“My consort,” Xaden replies casually. “Violet Sorrengail.”

I'm deceased.

17)

I can’t quit watching Xaden’s eyes in case their flecks change back to gold whenever I see him during Signet Sparring.

They never do.

Like my heart will never again NOT be broken for these two.

18)

“The pain. The mess. Give it to me. I’ll hold it. I know that sounds ludicrous, but I’ll find a way.” I lace our fingers. “I will hold everything you don’t want to feel because I love every part of you.”

This ship... this fucking ship...

19)

“Seems Catriona has found someone worth lagging behind for.”

I loathed her in the previous book....but gods did the poor girl go through it in this one....

20)

“There is no cure for me.” He presses a kiss to my forehead. “That’s why you have to become better than me. There’s only you.”

I seriously don't know why I'm putting myself through this torture.

21)

When things get…shitty, I hope you can look down at it and imagine us sitting there together when this is all over. That’s the vision I’m going to cling to: you and me, holding hands, looking over the city.

This right here broke whatever soul I thought I had left. It just hurts so much when the characters cling to a future that I fucking know isn't going to happen.

22)

It’s almost like this room is removed from time itself, a tiny corner of the world where we simultaneously live together yet don’t.

Rebecca literally...WHYYYYY????

23)

I didn’t reach for any form of power because even in that state, I knew it could take me back to day zero, and day zero doesn’t give me you. I clawed my way back to myself and left.

Screaming, crying, throwing up.

24)

While most deities allow temple attendants to choose their timeline of service, only two require a lifetime of dedication: Dunne and Loial. For both war and love change souls irrevocably.

For the love of Gods, please let this be some kind of clue.

25)

I love you more than this city. Do not die defending it.

Screaming. Crying. Throwing up.

26)

At some point I’ll stop looking for her, right?

I KNOW Andarna had her reasons... but my girl Violet did not deserve that after everything she's been through.

27)

His smile instantly becomes a core memory.

MY smile instantly becomes a core memory....as in I don't think I'll have one again.

28)

You’re not a weapon of destruction. You’re not venin. You’re the artery power chooses to flow through. You’re life.

I fucking ship this SO MUCH. I love me some enemies to lovers, slow burn, full of angst shit.

29)

When push comes to shove, I'm not the best of us. She is.

YES VIOLET, THAT'S YOUR BESTIE!!!!!!

30)

“That’s a little menacing,” I admit to Feirge. “Then let us be menaces,”

I ADORE multiple povs. I've been waiting for Rhi's and Imogen's pov for 3 books, and I was NOT disappointed. Wish I could have more of them though.

31)

She’ll rip the very sky apart before she and Glane accept defeat.

GO IMOGEN! GO! GO! GO!

32)

The flame of perpetual rage that lives in my chest burns hotter. Fuck that horde. Fuck the venin who ride them. Fuck that unholy vortex of a tornado at the end of the northern field, and fuck the orders to stay grounded in these winds.

FUCK! I love this girl so damn much.

33)

I’m glad it’s you with me. Parapet to Malek’s own doorstep. I’m so sorry I have to go first this time.

To be honest, I didn't really care about Quinn for three books now... but I SOBBED in these 3 pages.

34)

And you should tell him, Gen. Tell him, and you find some happy.

And the fact that she preached for my second favourite ship of the series with her dying breath??? Miss Quinn, you have my heart. I didn't care for your existence for three books, but man, did you get me in the end.

35)

“We made it a good one.”

This one cut me so fuckign deep I had to stop for a good ten minutes. I did not see it coming. I did not think I'd care. I still don't understand why I did. But I really, really did.

36)

“I’m not leaving you!” He leans in and slides his hand behind my neck. “I’m not leaving you, Imogen,” he repeats, softer this time.

If these two don't end up together, I'm gonna make it everybody's problem. I PROMISE!

37)

“You have been the gift of my life,” I tell Tairn.

I've read some theories that Tairn will die in the end... First of all...HOW DARE YOU? And second of all... REBECCA DON'T YOU DARE, I WILL-

38)

She was the first to choose me, to elevate me above all others, the first to see every ugly side of me and accept it all, and every single person in this fucking canyon will die before they remove a single one of her scales.

The fact that Xaden channeled for Violet but really turned to save Sgaeyl... I did not expect that. And although it was painful as fuck to read through... to me it was perfect and a job really well done.

39)

Shadow brings quiet. My soul departs like pieces of ash from a fire, flaking free and drifting away as power consumes the space it once inhabited. I’m no longer on the ice—I am the ice.

Xaden...baby...no....

40)

Save them, the last remaining pieces of me beg, holding on with teeth and claw to keep from being torn away, too.

I will never... ever... recover from this.

41)

“I love you.” Violet’s voice cracks the cold, and a silken thread of warmth wedges itself in the opening before it seals shut, locking it in place.

No. Wait. I grab for that thread with desperate hands, clawing to keep her as more of my pieces are blown away, lost to the void. She is warmth and light and air and love.

This was so fucking painful to read I literally have no fucking words.

44)

I love her. That is the emotion I cling to, the fire of pure power burning at the feeling’s edges, and I know if I take it any further, it will be the next and final piece to float away.

😭😭😭😭😭😭💔💔💔💔💔💔

45)

“What did you do?” My head snaps toward Imogen, and a deep sense of foreboding takes root in my chest. She slowly lifts her gaze to mine.

“What you asked me to.”

How THE FUCK am I supposed to wait who-knows how long for the next damned book???

All in all, I really enjoyed this. I never got bored and I didn't mind the side missions at all.

The xaden×violet of it all shattered my heart. I definitely loved their relationship more than the previous books (It really reminded me of their dynamic from one of the best pieces of literature I've ever had the pleasure to read, a fanfiction piece called Storm in the quiet by @justallihere. She is truly the best.).

I just knew this was coming, and all of their trying would lead to this... it tore my heart apart. I love heavy angst in my books, but it hurts like a motherfucker when you have to wait for the next book in a series. I've promised myself I would never start an unfinished series ever again but oh well....

I loved the side characters so much, and I feel like I got to see them more and get to know them better in this one.

Ridoc is the best comic relief character I've read in a long, long time, and I love him so much (I almost had a heart attack when I thought the cook actually stabbed him.)

Aaric is a little shit and I'm so here for it. His exceptionally well written character was one of the highlights of the book for me.

Imogen and Garrick are my babies and I want them to end up together SO FUCKING BAD.

Also, the Drake and Mira crumbs? Chef's kiss.

I have to admit I was very fed shipping wise.

Unexpectedly, I also laughed my ass off in this book... so I'll probably make another post with all the times I died of laughter. Who would have thought?

My soul will definitely need mending and a good dose of fanfiction to get me through the long wait. To the people who are gifted enough to write these fanfcitions, you are my heroes. Cheers!

Final thought, Xaden Riorson, THE MAN that you are.

Accurate image of me after finishing Onyx Storm:

[stupidlittlespirit]

I’m a mother of 3, and my middle child just turned 8. I read your tags. I cannot even FATHOM taking my child, dropping him off in a parking lot to make him think that I’ve abandoned him, and then come back and say “you should appreciate me.” ………… ffffffuckk that. The instance with your mother also, I can’t even imagine telling my child something like that. My heart absolutely aches for you. Legit I’m furious, I’m crying and my hands are shaking. No child should ever have to go through something like that. I am so so sorry you didn’t have the foundation you should have had in this world and it’s RIDICULOUS for people to say you didn’t succeed because you weren’t focused enough holy shit you were just trying to SURVIVE. My mother and step father were not abusive, but they were somewhat misguided and they did not help me get a good start to adulthood. I remember being told “you’re an adult, figure it out” at like 18. So I can imagine the kind of hardships you faced and I think you deserve all the grace in the world for your situation.

You know how at Pride events sometimes there’s parents there offering free hugs, because lgbtq+ people don’t always have parents that support them? Well this stranger on the internet who is a mom supports you 🥲

As someone who has written fanfic since (I’m a couple years older than you lol I’m gonna date myself here 😅) 2003, I know all the times that fanfic was literally the only thing in my life that was keeping me going, specifically the kind and wonderful interaction I received from reviewers. It made me feel like I wasn’t so alone, it made me feel like I had people cheering for me and people in this world who cared about me.

Your MtB series has been living rent free in my head since I found it. Like you find that one story that just takes up all your thoughts and you reread it before bed like a lil bedtime story (shut up you know exactly which chapters I keep rereading 😆🤭) and I am so interested and invested as to where it will go next. As soon as you mentioned Reader was glowing I was like hey that’s like Base12’s fic! I was really pleased to see yours was inspired by that one! Ford is my favorite Gravity Falls character and I love how much you understand him.

Oh also OF COURSE I still want MtB to end in smut LOL! 😆 idc how much body horror you put in I still want the good stuff 👌😆😁 I think they both deserve it after all this!

Anyway sorry about my rambling on this and how long this got, but I just couldn’t see what you went through and not say something 🥺 I hope you’re doing well and there are people out there who care about you! ❤️

Yeah it's funny you say that because I often look at children interacting with parents on the street and think to myself 'wow they're so little, I couldn't imagine doing something like what my parents did to me'. I literally step aside to let kids through on the pavement because I'm afraid that if I brush up against them as I walk by I might knock them off balance or something lol. I couldn't imagine hurting one on purpose. They're just babies!

And thank you, that's very sweet of you haha I really appreciate it <3 Thanks for being my internet mum!!!!

Ahh I'm so glad you like the series! I definitely write for the same reason in the sense that I hope it offers some small comfort to other people because it was one of the only good memories I have from childhood. I used to spend all my time reading fics and living in this different world, and I guess my intention is just to offer that to someone else. That's why I like hearing from you guys when you comment and stuff! <3 When people tell me they stayed up all night reading a fic, it makes me so happy because I can recall how much fun I used to have doing exactly that. I mean, go to bed by the way but LMAO

Ugh yeah they definitely do deserve to fuck nasty at the end of this thing lol I need them to get all this tension and angst out of each other! Heated sex scene pending.

Thank you, it's really kind of you to reach out like this. I'm in a decent place now. I'm finally in therapy that I fought very hard to get and it's really helping me. I live with my partner and I have two lovely cats, plus some very wonderful friends. It took a long time to even feel slightly happy, but I'm miles better than I was. There's still a long way to go but what is life if not a journey, right? I'll get there eventually. I haven't done all that work to give up now :)

[beefromanoff]

Going Under Ch. 18

summary: following the press conference, the team heads back to the compound where Bucky gives Gianna a tour of where she'll be staying.

characters: Bucky Barnes x OC

soundtrack: somewhere only we know - keane

warnings: fluff, pop star fantasy x love story, set in an AU where the Avengers reunite after Civil War, pre-infinity war, slight angst, hurt/comfort, lonely reader/OC.

author’s note: i'm on my FREQUENT UPLOAD game lately...enjoy! xo

chapter list

_______________________________________________

The last remaining bit of daylight streaked across the sky in deep purple hues as the Quinjet touched back down at the compound. This was the first time Gianna had seen the outside since being brought here following the accident. The famed Avengers Compound stood nestled amidst the picturesque woods, a technological marvel hidden from the world. It’s existence was no secret, but the details were the stuff of legends. 

Some people said this was simply another division of the United States Military. Others claimed it operated as a bed and breakfast for various space-entities and gods. Neither of which were entirely untrue. From what Gianna had gathered, it was multi-purpose. This was where the Avengers split their time, most of the team having residences in both the Tower and at the Compound. There was also a massive training and operations facility for the new and improved SHIELD division, with all intelligence being privately screened and vetted onsite. There was an aviation hangar for all maintenance and storage of their various aircraft, and then several more sprawling units that Gianna had no idea about. Oh, and it all overlooked the most stunning, glassy lake she’d ever seen. 

After they padded down the exit ramp, Gianna turned, realizing she didn’t know where she was going. “I hope it’s not too late to ask for that tour?” Eager, but tired eyes peered up at him.

“I still have an hour or so before the mandatory bedtime.” Bucky mimed checking his watch. 

“I guess we better walk fast.” 

As they crossed through the hangar and into the main building, the grand foyer welcomed them with its polished floors and high-tech holographic displays. Gianna's eyes widened in amazement. "Wow…Bucky, this place is incredible!"

Bucky smiled, his metal arm glinting in the ambient light. He’d undone the top few buttons and rolled the sleeves on his dress shirt, a look reminiscent of a groomsman late in a wedding reception, looking handsome in a disheveled way. "You haven't seen anything yet. Come on, we’ve got a lot of ground to cover. Literally."

They strolled through the spacious common areas, passing by the lavish coffee station that catered to the Avengers' and SHIELD members’ caffeine cravings. "This is where Tony Stark fuels his genius," Bucky quipped, punching a few buttons on a tablet embedded in the marble countertop. 

At first, it looked like any other coffee shop, espresso machines and syrups lining the back wall. As Bucky took a step back, Gianna realized that Stark Industries really did do everything better.

A mechanical arm whirred to life in the dark cafe, whirring through the motions of making a latte. They watched in silence, the sound of the milk frother filling the air and the scent of espresso filling their noses. After a moment, the arm deposited two steaming lattes on the counter, Stark Industries emblazoned in the frothy milk on top.

Gianna took a sip, savoring the rich flavor. "Okay, one sip of this and I feel like I can save the world too. I know the Avengers’ real secret weapon." She dug a teasing elbow in his ribs.

“Let’s get this round of bruises healed up before we send you into round two, huh?”

Bucky chuckled, guiding her toward the floor-to-ceiling windows that overlooked the compound's picturesque lake. "And that is one of my favorite spots," he said, his gaze drifting to the tranquil waters. "It's peaceful here, away from...everything."

Gianna nodded, her eyes mirroring the calm of the lake. "It's beautiful."

They stood quietly for a moment, side-by-side gazing out the windows across the water. The last bit of the light faded away and their own reflections began to look more prominent. Gianna took the rare moment to run her eyes over Bucky, settling for the reflection rather than the man standing right beside her. She took note of how he towered over her, easily a foot taller. His shoulders were broad, and though he had good posture, he always leaned slightly to the left under the weight of his vibranium arm. His chin length dark hair was tucked behind his ears, but still slightly ruffled from where he’d run his hands through it. Even in the dark glass, Gianna saw how his gaze seemed to have relaxed from the worried expression she’d gotten so used to. 

Maybe this is when we finally get to rest. Both of us. 

As they continued their after-hours tour, Bucky showed her the state-of-the-art training facilities, where the recruits honed their skills. There was a massive complex for the agents to practice sparring, a sprawling weight room, and an impressive shooting range. He explained that the Avengers had their own, smaller version of the training facility on the ground floor of their housing building. Everything except the shooting range had been replicated to allow them to train in privacy. In reality, they probably could only train with each other anyways, not even the best agent could hold their own with an Avenger.

It was oddly quiet across the grounds. Bucky explained that they had a night team of agents who monitored surveillance and stayed alert in case anything were to happen during off-hours, but everyone else went home at night. Some would stay late to train or research, but that was on their own time. 

After crossing between buildings in the cool night air, they stepped into the building at the back of the grounds, the one where the team lived part time. All of the buildings were short and expanse, not appearing to be more than four stories tall at most. This one was no different. The bottom floor was, as Bucky had said, a training facility. Weights, sparring rings, locker rooms, things Gianna didn’t recognize. They breezed through the floor, heading straight to the elevators. 

“Second floor is the main common area, living room, kitchen, movie room…things like that. Third and fourth floors are where the bedrooms are. You’d think there would be some kind of system for who got which room, but I think the official method was arm-wrestling for the best one.”

Cocking an eyebrow, Gianna smirked. “So you have…?”

“The biggest room.”

“I thought so.” She giggled as they crossed through the elevators onto the fourth floor. The doors opened up to a smaller, round living space with a kitchenette on the wall to the side. Doors lined the walls, leading to each separate bedroom.

It seemed like each floor had roughly five rooms. Before she finished counting off Avengers in her head, her thoughts were interrupted. 

“Look who’s back for round two of the best damn karaoke she’s ever heard.” Sam’s unmistakable voice called from the sofa. He had a beer in one hand and a TV remote in the other, which he used to click off the volume.

Gianna could basically feel Bucky rolling his eyes beside her, but she ignored it, striding across the soft carpet. “Hi, Sam. It’s good to see you.” 

“It’s good to see you too, kid.” He wrapped her in a hug. “Heard you can take a blast with the best of ‘em.” 

She shrugged. “That’s not what my MRI said. Concussion.”

“Ah, those are a dime a dozen around here. That’s the main reason we have FRIDAY, to remind us of every damn thing we forget. Ain’t that right, FRIDAY?”

“Correct, Mr. Wilson.” 

Just as she was beginning to wonder if she’d get the hang of the mysterious robotic voice who seemed to be omniscient, she felt Bucky’s hand on her lower back. 

“Ready to see your room?”

A flutter went through her stomach and she wasn’t sure if it was from his hand or from his words. Her room. Although she knew it was temporary, the idea of having a more permanent space than a hotel room sounded heavenly. Even having roommates, or suitemates, or whatever you would call this arrangement…a dream. She wondered where the rest of the team was, how often she could expect to see them here. Already, her mind conjured up images of rom-coms on the couch with Nat and Wanda. Well, when the world didn’t need saving. 

As they closed in on the back of the living area, Bucky stood next to two doors. 

“This is you.” He gestured to the door on the left and grinned. “I’m not too far away. Just like old times.” He nodded to the second door. 

“Do I need to ask how the room right next to yours, which happened to be the biggest room of all, happens to be up for the taking?” She narrowed her eyes at him, her smile giving away her true feelings on their proximity. 

“Sam should be better at arm wrestling.” He shrugged. 

“Hey, I heard that!” Sam’s voice called over the back of the couch. 

Turning the knob, Bucky opened the door to reveal a spacious and beautifully decorated room.

"It’s no Four Seasons, but…" he said, stepping aside to let her enter.

Gianna stepped into the room, her eyes taking in the elegant furnishings, the comfortable bed, and the view of the forest beyond the window. It felt like a sanctuary. She turned to Bucky, her heart so full of gratitude it felt like it could burst. 

"Thank you, Bucky. You've been amazing… through all of this. I don’t even have the words. Thank you."

Bucky smiled, his blue eyes warm. "It's my job to keep you safe. There’s nowhere safer than right here. I’ll make sure of that.”

“You deserve a raise.” Gianna murmured, still glancing around the room. 

“This was all Pepper. Wanda helped decorate, I think. She asked me for your Pinterest, or something like that. I told her I didn’t know what the hell that was. I guess she didn’t need it after all.” 

“You know what I mean.” She turned back to face him. “For going above and beyond. Everything you do…outside your contract.” 

Their eyes met, and Gianna stepped closer to him. Looking into his eyes, smelling his familiar scent, it dawned on her that they hadn’t ever discussed that night at Tony’s party. The kiss.

“I’m pretty sure my contract says ‘other duties as assigned’,” Bucky said, eyes drifting down to her lips. For a moment, Gianna thought he was going to lean in. Maybe it was just wishful thinking. 

“Do you need anything? Everything from the hotel should be here, if anything is missing we can send for it tomorrow. Water’s in the fridge outside, bathroom is next to the closet, and you know I’m right next door.”

“No…I don’t think I do. If you hear a loud noise, it’s just me falling asleep in the shower.”

He chuckled before stepping back to the door. “Goodnight, Gianna.” 

“Goodnight, Buck.”He pulled the door closed behind him. As she walked over to the bathroom to start the hot stream, Gianna pushed away the thought that the only thing she needed had just walked out her door.

[ezwezz]

OH MY GOD I LOVED YOUR HEADCANONS POST ON WHAT THE CHARACTERS PERSONALITIES WOULD BE LIKE IN MODERN DAY! WHAT HOBBIES DO YOU THINK THEY WOULD HAVE TOO?

wow thank you so much!! it really means a lot :)) also thanks for the suggestion!! <3

Eren:

- tbh, I can see Eren as a hardcore gamer. not just because he's an angry soul but I can see him needing something to release his angst and stress, therefore I think fast-paced, fairly simple gaming would work the trick for him.

Mikasa:

- ahh mikasa is amazing at embroidery seeing as her mum taught her at a young age.

- she uses it to escape the moment and take her mind off the day, usually getting carried away and designing an entire display of perfectly stitched artwork.

Armin:

- I feel like Armin really loves to read. not just because he's canonically a nerd, but I also think he reads to feed into his wild imagination.

- Armin definitely has bedtime scenarios he creates based off books.

Jean:

- not only is Jean good at art, I can also see him being amazing at singing- although he never does it in front of anyone.

- his voice is very gravelly- like something you'd hear in modern rock. if you're close with him, he might mumble a quiet tune whilst the two of you chill.

Connie:

- I can definitely see Connie playing the guitar.

- when there's people around he'll get nervous and just play 'wonderwall' for the jokes, but when he's alone he'll play a lot more advanced, serious songs and simply get lost in the music.

Sasha:

- we all know Sasha is great at archery, but in modern times I can't really see that being her thing. instead I reckon she's an awesome swimmer.

- she's probably won a bunch of races and entered loads of competitions but she doesn't take it too seriously therefore nobody's aware of her hobby.

Reiner:

- aside from working out, I feel like Reiner has a lot of unresolved issues in his head therefore he does a lot of meditation to wind down before bed.

- he's never told anyone except bertholdt (whether that's a romantic or platonic bond, you can decide).

Bertholdt:

- I definitely headcanon Bertholdt being into tenis like I mentioned in my last post. I can also see him doing golfing since it's a lot more chill and he likes to have a balance.

Annie:

- I think on the most part, Annie being a fighter as a hobby makes a lot of sense and I reckon she'd definitely take part in some form of martial art.

- on the other hand, I can also see her needing a calmer, more peaceful hobby on the sidelines therefore I believe she'd play the piano when she's alone.

Erwin:

- I would love to say erwin has a not-so grandpa-like hobby however I can't shake the aching truth of him being invested in collecting stamps.

- he 100% has a book just filled with stamps from various decades and different areas.

- he takes a lot of pride in his collection as hange and levi have had a full briefing on the backstory of every single stamp he owns.

Levi:

- It may sound a bit of a reach however I can totally see Levi volunteering at an animal shelter of sorts.

- I've put some thought into this one and came to the conclusion that he's an animal person. he thinks animals are so much better than humans and if he could, he would stay at the shelter all day simply venting to the animals- they never interrupt, judge or try to understand, they're simply there to listen and he appreciates that more than anything.

Hange:

- Hange would 100% love to travel and learn about different cultures.

- They love the sheer thrill of experiencing new things and seeing different sights therefore they would probably choose to backpack across countries instead of going on proper holidays. it allows them to experience everything so much more authentically and realistically.

Historia:

- I think Historia is such a poetic-minded individual since her entire childhood had been formed through literature. with that being said I think she'll love to write.

- she was completely inspired by novels at a young age and would give anything to allow others to experience the same wonder she felt at the time.

Ymir:

- Ymir would absolutely love competitive sport. I can ultimately see her playing football (or soccer...whatever floats your boat.)

- she enjoys the thrill and pressure of the match. (she also likes the cheerleaders but we won't get into that).

Hitch:

- I definitely see Hitch being a dancer, and no, not just tiktok dancing.

- I think she'll enjoy doing contemporary dance styles like ballet and slow dancing since it's her way of venting the tougher emotions she keeps bottled up.

Pieck:

- Pieck is a plant mother.

- there's no explanation for this one, she just owns an entire habitat of plants. (she has names for each and every one of them and may or may not bawl her eyes out when one of them dies).

Porco:

- Porco is definitely a rugby lad.

- ramming into people and knocking them off their feet with sheer bodily force is his form of therapy. it also gives him a lot of confidence in himself which he wouldn't have if he'd never taken up sport in general.

Onyankopon:

- Onyankopon is a pro at chess and you cannot change my mind.

- I can see him being amazing at strategy games since he loves to put his mind to work in a competitive style.

Yelena:

- eat, sleep, worship zeke.

[wrenhyperfixates]

Don’t Gotta Work it Out

Pairing: Loki x reader Summary: A particularly nasty fight rattles your relationship with Loki. Even as both of you wonder if you’re not meant to work things out, you long to be in each other’s arms. But can you make amenjds before your hope is gone? Warnings: mentions of depression; angst, some more angst, then a lot more angst, and finally a fluffy ending A/N: inspired by the song Don’t Gotta Work it Out by Fitz and the Tantrums. I’m experimenting with a new style, so flashbacks in italics! Hope you enjoy :)

Tag List: @lucywrites02 @frostedgiant @lunarmoon8​ @twhiddlestonsstuff​ @lokistan​ @lowkeyorlokificrecs​ @gaitwae​ @whatafuckingdumbass​ @castiels-majestic-wings​ @kozkaboi​ @cozy-the-overlord​ @birdgirl90​ @myraiswack​

Disclaimer: Gif not mine

Loki had signed himself up for the mission before the words even left Tony’s mouth. He didn’t care where he was going or what he was doing, just so long as he was away from you. You’d gotten into a fight—a bad one. Somehow, Loki’s way of dealing with it was running away. Whether that was because of pride, pettiness, or cowardice, he wasn’t really sure. Then again, he was avoiding thinking about it as much as possible.

“I have volunteered for a mission,” he told you, the sentence short and clipped as he entered your shared quarters. “I leave at midnight.”

“Oh,” you replied, rolling over on your bed so you were facing your boyfriend. He’d already grabbed his bag and started packing. “That’s nice.”

A small hum of acknowledgement was all he made in the way of a response. He perched on the edge of the bed as he tugged on his boots. Right as he finished with the last buckle and was making ready to stand, your arms suddenly encircled his waist. For a minute, the room was filled with hesitation and quiet breathing, a spell of tension only broken when Loki’s hand alighted on top of yours. Not to say everything was fixed between you two, but the anxious energy in the room calmed a bit.

“Just... Come back safe, ok?” you said, your voice so soft, it just barely registered in his mind.

“Alright,” he whispered back. Your forehead rested in between his shoulder blades, and his thumb involuntarily began rubbing small circles on your skin. “I will.”

How Loki wished for more, for the passionate kisses that you usually shared before a mission. But he knew that wasn’t going to happen now. It might even be wrong considering how mad you were at each other, everything you’d said. Though, if it really was wrong, Loki didn’t think he much would have minded; it still would have felt good. Felt normal. Not like whatever messed up situation you were in right now.

You and the trickster god had been dating for over a year and, as any couple would, had a few squabbles. But nothing like what you’d gone through the other day. Loki shuddered now, just thinking about it. It started out stupid, as these things tend to, but turned into something much more serious. He tried to push it from his mind as you placed a featherlight kiss to the base of his neck. Then you pulled away, hugging your knees to your chest. Now it was Loki’s turn to look at you. His hand hovered above your knee for a second before he lost his nerve and let it fall to the mattress.

“I have to go now,” he said. “Take care of yourself.”

You nodded, and Loki walked to the door, looking back at you one last time. You’d already rolled over so your back was to him again, but he could tell you were crying from the way you were breathing. It made his heart break, but all he could do was whisper a small “I love you” and hope you heard.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Oh. You’re awake,” you said, entering your quarters.

“I am,” Loki replied, staring at the fire crackling in the hearth. There was an open book in his lap, and you couldn’t help but wonder how long ago he’d given up on reading in favor of a contemplative trance, looking at the flames. “And you are home now. Are we all caught up?”

“Ok, it’s past someone’s bedtime,” you answered him, catching on to the ice in his voice. “And no, we’re not all caught up. What’s wrong?”

“You could have invited me.”

You’d gone bowling with roughly half the team, only leaving a note for Loki so he knew where you were. You huffed as you tossed your keys onto the dresser. Leaning back on it, you surveyed his face, set in a harsh manner.

“Sorry,” you shrugged. “You were in the shower, and I knew you wouldn’t want to come, anyway.”

“And what if I did?”

“Then, sorry again. You can come next time.”

“Oh, can I now?”

You pushed off the dresser and walked over to him, rubbing his shoulders a little. He didn’t shake you off, but he didn’t relax at all either. You frowned and walked around to the front of the chair, planting yourself in his lap. His arms instinctively wrapped around you, but his face was still stuck in a scowl.

“What’s this really about?” you asked, resting your head on his shoulder.

“It hardly matters.”

You clenched your jaw a bit. You love Loki, but it’s hard to deal with him when he gets like this.

“If you’re going to brush it off,” you said, forcing a smile, “then don’t act so obviously upset and angry. I’m always here to talk, but if you’re not going to, then don’t pick a fight.”

“It seems to me you are the one picking a fight.”

“Yeah, ok. Whatever,” you snapped, standing up. You waited for him to clench his fists or give some sign he was feeling something, but he was as unreadable as ever. “I’ll just never have fun without you. Sound good?”

“You are blowing this out of proportion, darling,” he drawled. “You can calm down.”

“Oh, can I now?” you answered with a smug smile, the petty parts of you egging you on to parrot back his words from earlier.

He sprung up from his chair and approached you fast as lightning. It startled you, and you gasped, walking until your back was against the wall. Loki menaced over you, placing one hand next to your head. He made sure to leave the other side open so you could get away if you really wanted to. You didn’t, instead staring defiantly into his eyes.

“You should,” he growled. “Just invite me next time and drop this nonsense.”

“Wow,” you scoffed, crossing your arms as he made to spin away from you. “Just because no one’s ever cared to listen to you before doesn’t mean you get to make yourself a martyr.”

Your hands immediately flew to your mouth. Loki had shared everything about his past with you. Really and truly, every painful memory. Every ugly, gritty moment. You knew how much stuff like that damaged him. He spun back around, rage plain on his face, and a deep hurt lurking behind his eyes.

“Loki, I’m so sorry,” you said, rushing toward him. “I didn’t mean-”

He put up a hand to stop both your words and approach. “No. I think you did. It is my fault for believing a mortal of all beings could have any depth of understanding, of feeling. For thinking you could love me. The joke is on me, I suppose, hmm?”

He scoffed and stalked toward the door, refusing to let you see the tears in his eyes. He was yanking on the knob before you could even say his name again. The last thing he saw before slamming the door behind him was you crumpling on the ground in a sobbing mess. As he stomped down the hall, his own tears began to pour.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Loki, are you even trying to sleep?” Bruce asked from across the hotel room.

Tony had taken a room for himself and stuck Bruce and Loki together in an adjoining one. Thankfully, it had two beds, but Loki was still a little pissed. Honestly, he’d considered just skipping the hotel and going on a walk, a long walk. Instead, he was laying with his eyes open and glued to the ceiling, reliving the fight in his mind over and over again.

“Yes, Banner, I am,” the god huffed. “I am just not having any success.”

“Is there... something on your mind?” Bruce hesitantly asked. He and Loki were far from best friends, but he figured it would be considerate to ask.

“Actually, there is,” he sighed.

“Do you, uh, want to... talk about it?”

“Yes,” he sighed. “I suppose you are a doctor, after all.”

“Not that kind but-”

“My beloved and I have gotten into an argument, and now I am on this mission. So, we have not made up. I fear we never will.”

“Oh, come one. I’ve seen you two. How bad could it be?”

Loki sighed and sat up on the bed, recounting the story. He did his best to keep the tears out of his eyes and emotion out of his voice, and was met with far more success on the first front than the second.

“Yikes,” Bruce said when he finished. “I mean, they tried to say they didn’t mean it. And I’m sure you didn’t either. So maybe just try to talk?”

“Perhaps. Or maybe we are not supposed to work it out.”

“That’s crazy. Look at you right now; you can’t stop thinking about them.”

“And do you think they are thinking of me?”

“You know what, yeah. I do.”

Loki just mumbled his thanks and flipped onto his side so he was facing the wall now. Bruce went back to sleep, and Loki prayed that slumber would claim him. It did not, and he spent the whole night wishing for you. That he had never said those awful things. That he had never even been given the opportunity to know you, for if he didn’t, he never would have hurt you.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You laid on the floor crying for hours. The notion that Loki would come back and wrap you in a hug and talk about what happened didn’t leave you be for hours. And then, all of a sudden, it did. Then you just felt empty and tired. Somehow, you managed to pick yourself up and drag yourself into bed, still in your clothes from the day. You waited another hour, still believing Loki would come back, if even just to lay beside you in the bed you shared and say nothing. When it became clear he wouldn’t, you submit to the tears still stinging the back of your eyes, and cried yourself to sleep.

Waking up the next morning, you didn’t immediately remember what had happened. You felt the empty space next to you where your boyfriend usually was. You listened for the running water of the shower that you could always hear on the mornings he wasn’t beside you. The silence was deafening.

“Loki?” you called out to the vacant room.

Only the echo of your voice answered you. Suddenly, the memory of the night before came crashing back into your mind. A strangled sob escaped your lips. You desperately looked around, frantically searching, begging, for some sort of sign that he’d returned in the night and had just left before you awakened. There was no indication that such a thing had happened.

Moving on autopilot, you found yourself in the shower. You tried to wash, but mainly just stood there and let the scalding spray run over you. Eventually, the stream turned cold as you used up the last of the warm water. You always enjoyed how plushy the towels in the Tower were, but you hardly noticed it as you dried off. Some water still dripping off you, you pulled on your robe. The mirror revealed that your eyes were still a little puffy from crying. Your pruny fingers touched the reddened skin, but you couldn’t be bothered to do anything to cover it up.

“You’re back,” you gasped, walking back out into the bedroom.

He was sitting in a chair, different from the one last night, this time actually reading the book he had. He looked so composed that it made you embarrassed by your appearance. You were sure he was just as much a mess on the inside as you were, though. At least you hoped he was.

“Mhm,” he replied. “And you are dripping on the carpet.”

You looked down where, surely enough, a small wet spot was gathering from the droplets rolling off your body. Everything was moving at half speed in your mind because of how drained you were, both physically and emotionally.

“Sorry,” you mumbled.

He didn’t even really acknowledge it as he sidestepped around you and into the bathroom. A few seconds later, you heard the shower turn on. Summoning all your strength, you managed to get dressed for the day, encasing yourself in your most comfortable clothes. You looked at the door and considered getting something to eat, but the pull of your warm blankets was too great. The bed, devoid of your lover, reminded you too much of last night, though. You grabbed the blankets off and swaddled yourself in them on the couch. You tried to shut out the world and go back to sleep. It didn’t work.

“Darling?” Loki softly called as the bathroom door opened.

You wanted to reply, you really did, but it felt like too much effort to peel your eyes open and will your voice to work. So, you listened as he padded over to where you were. He sighed and left, leaving your quarters silent once more. You didn’t even have the energy left to cry.

Roughly ten minutes later, you heard the god come back in and set something on the coffee table. The aroma of pancakes, bacon, and tea flooded your senses seconds after, and you felt your heart somehow swell and break at the same moment. Loki’s hand softly touched your cheek and caressed it so gently, it seemed he was afraid you might break.

“Sleep well, my darling,” he whispered.

Loki kissed the top of your head as gently as he had touched your cheek, his damp hair tickling your skin. He stood up and, though you couldn’t see, felt him turn and look at you once more. Then the door closed, and the strength to cry returned to your body.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Please, Steve,” you beseeched. “Just tell me where he is.”

“I’m sorry, you know I can’t.” He truly did look hurt that he had to keep this from you, especially when he noticed the tears welling in your eyes. “It’s top secret.”

You were trying to figure out where Loki was, if he was ok. You should have asked him more about the mission; he would have told you where he was going, rules be damned. But you hadn’t, so he hadn’t, and now he’d been gone for three days with no word on when he’d return. You tried his cell phone, but Steve had at least informed you that they had to turn off anything that could be tracked for the mission.

You felt so awful about what you’d said, the guilt gnawing at your heart every minute of every day, every dream of every night. If he were to die before you could work it out... you just didn’t know what you would do. Even if you never made up, you just needed him to make it back safely. Maybe you didn’t have to work it out, shouldn’t. Maybe you were a toxic poison ruining his life. Refusing to cry in front of Steve, you pushed the thought from your mind.

“But he’s my boyfriend. Doesn’t that count for something more than the rules?” you pleaded, the look of desperation in your eyes only growing.

“Sorry, but it doesn’t. Look, it would be different if you were married. What I can tell you,” he said with a sigh, and a quick glance over his shoulder, “is that he’s alive and safe.”

“Thank you,” you sniffled. “I guess that’s something, at least. When will he be back?”

“Soon, ok?”

“Ok,” you sniffled again.

You trudged over to the couch in the common room, trying to spend time someplace other than your room for the first time since the fight. Besides quick meals, you’d just been moping in your quarters. The thought crossed your mind that you were probably depressed, that you should get up and exercise or move about. Despite the knowledge of that, you couldn’t actually muster up the willpower to act on it. Instead, you flipped on the TV and pulled the blanket hanging over the back of the sofa snugly around your shoulders. The voice of Gordon Ramsey faded into background noise as you stared out the window, foolishly and fruitlessly hoping that you’d see Loki’s ship flying in.

“Monday,” Steve sighed, setting a mug of hot chocolate on a coaster for you.

“What?” you asked, slightly bewildered after abruptly being pulled from your trance.

“Don’t tell anyone I told you, but Loki’s coming back on Monday.” Steve sat beside you and comfortingly pat your back as you expressed your gratitude. “Can I give you some advice, though?”

“Please.”

“Whatever happened between you two, you can work it out. I promise.”

“I just feel so bad, Steve. I said something horrible that I never should have.” You bit your lip before continuing, nervous you were oversharing. The way your companion was sympathetically nodding his head, however, urged you on. “And then he said something awful too. And now he’s gone, and no one will even tell me where to find him. Maybe it’s a sign that we shouldn’t work it out. That we’re not right for each other.”

“Come on, that’s just the fear talking. I know sometimes the team grumbles about you guys, but it’s only because you’re so sweet together.” He waited for some sign of recognition that what he was saying was true to click on your face before continuing. “Take it from me, you don’t want to let an opportunity to pass you by; even more so when it comes to being with someone you love. You have to make the most of every moment. But you also have to be willing to work through your disagreements, even if they’re particularly bad. Heck, especially then.”

“Thanks, Steve.” You managed a smile. It was small, but it was also the first one that had made its way onto your face in nearly a week. Not only did you realize you had great friends surrounding you, but you felt a spark of hope that you could repair things with Loki. “I’ll keep that in mind.”

“Good. Now, want to come for a training session? Take your mind off things for a bit?”

“Thanks, but no thanks. I’m still not really feeling up to it. But soon, I promise,” you added when a flash of worry danced across his face.

He gave a nod and one final friendly pat on the shoulder, then was off. You went back to staring out the window, now gently sipping on your cocoa. It was still a bit too hot, and it burnt your tongue a little. You knew you should wait until it cooled, but the pain kept you tethered to the earth instead of floating away. You also knew what Loki would say to that so, after a few more sips, you set it down to let it become a more drinkable temperature. As you waited, you let your mind be filled with thoughts of Loki, wondering if he was thinking of you too. Soon, your eyes were drooping shut, and you succumbed to dreams of happier times with your beloved.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The rest of the day passed much the same, with you pretending to be asleep. Loki knew you were awake at some point, at least, to eat the food he’d brought. Otherwise, he would have flown into a panic that his little mortal was unwell. Or, more unwell than just in an emotional sense, anyway. There was one point where he saw your eyes crack open and look at him as he sat nearby, switching between reading and thinking. You didn’t say anything, though, so neither did he.

“Brother?” Thor said, knocking at the door. “Are you two in there?”

Loki rushed to the door and, opening it, shushed the God of Thunder. He gently closed the door behind him as not to wake you, thinking you may really be asleep now.

“We are, brother,” he whispered. “Why?”

“The team has not seen either of you all day. Is everything alright? Are either of you ill? Or perhaps you’re just having fun in there?” Thor playfully elbowed his brother in the ribs and suggestively wiggled his eyebrows. “Oh, and why are we whispering?”

“Because my beloved is sleeping.” Loki felt a prick of fear in his heart. Maybe he had lost the privilege of calling you his beloved. “We are ok. Relatively.”

“Relatively?”

“Yes. We... We had a fight,” Loki exhaled. “It was not pretty.”

“But you are going to work it out, right?” Thor sighed when Loki said nothing. “Oh, come on, brother. You must talk to them.”

“I will. At some point.”

With some final words of encouragement, Thor let his brother be. Loki took a deep breath and reentered his room. You were sitting up on the couch, twiddling with your thumbs, eyes cast down. He tentatively sat at the end by your feet. Elbows on his knees, he buried his head in his hands.

“Well,” he said to the floor, “are we going to talk about it?”

He felt you flinch at how angry he sounded, while he mentally kicked himself for the same reason. He peeked out from behind his hands, trying to compose himself so he could speak to you in a calm voice.

“I mean,” you said, “if that’s what you want.”

“Oh, and you do not want it?” he snapped, silently cursing himself again.

“Please,” you scoffed, “don’t do anything for my sake.”

Now you were both angry at yourselves, and completely honestly, the other too. When it became clear neither of you was going to say anything else, Loki stood to leave. He spun back around when he heard you mumble something under your breath.

“I’m sorry, darling,” he said in a too-sweet voice, making the pet name sound more like a threat or a mockery than anything else. “I did not quite get that. Would you like to speak up?”

“Yeah,” you snarled, this time loud enough for him to hear. “I said, ‘so you’re really just gonna walk out again, huh?’”

“Oh, allow me to apologize. I must have been making myself a martyr again, hmm? Was that not what you said last night? Or perhaps that was just me blowing things out of proportion again?” He looked down at you as a panic flooded every inch of your body. Loki wanted to stop, but his floodgates had been opened. “But I thought that no one cared to listen to me. Again, I do believe those are your words, not mine.”

“That’s not- I didn’t- I’m not-” you struggled to form a coherent sentence. “I didn’t mean that!”

“No? But it is what you said. Perhaps it was that ever condemning Freudian slip of the tongue? Or do you think yourself so special, mortal, that you care? For I know no one else ever has; I did not need you to tell me that,” he spat.

“You know what?” you laughed without mirth. “You’re right, this isn’t what I want.”

Loki knew he’d pushed too far. His voice grew immensely softer as he spoke again. Not in a kind way, but in a way that showed he was afraid.

“And what exactly, do you mean by ‘this’?”

“This, what we’re doing now. I don’t know what it is, but if it’s your way of talking about what’s wrong and working it out, it’s not what I want. I guess you should just go, Loki.”

Loki hated himself. No, that wasn’t strong enough. He loathed himself, utterly and completely. He slammed the door behind him, and immediately sank back against it, falling to the floor. Neither of you heard the other’s sobs over your the sound of your own.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Though Monday was only two days after Steve told you it would be the date of Loki’s arrival, it felt like years elapsed in those forty-eight hours. By some miracle that, you thought with a tiny laugh, Loki would have said was thanks to the Norns, you managed to get yourself into a presentable state. Shower? Check. Teeth brushed? Check. Eyes normal and not red from crying? As checked as it could be.

Steve had promised that he’d get Loki to go to your room straight away. You figured if you two were going to have it out again, it should be in private. Though, you were hoping it would go a great deal better than last time. You could only hope that some time and space was all the two of you would need to finally work through this.

Your breath hitched in your throat as the doorknob turned and Loki shuffled in. The door softly clicked shut behind him, and you tried to quell your worry that your conversation would end with him slamming it again. He dropped his bag at his feet, and for a second, the world stopped. You just looked at each other, both too afraid to end the moment of peace.

“I am back,” he gently said, opening his arms to you.

You took a single hesitant step forward before fully launching yourself into his arms. He caught you with surprising grace, and though he seemed unsure of himself, calmly rubbed your back.

“Can we... Can we try again?” you asked, pulling back enough so you could look into his beautiful, blue-green eyes. “The working things out, I mean. Can we try that again?”

“Yes, my darling.” The pet name had returned to something more gentle, holding the usual care and affection it did. “I’d love nothing more.”

Hand in hand, you walked toward the couch. This time you sat with bodies angling towards each other, already starting off on a high note. It made both of you feel the other was much more willing to listen to what you had to say.

“Shall I start?” he asked, cupping your cheek.

“No, I want to go first.” Your hand rested on top of his and you leaned into his touch. “If that’s alright with you?”

“It is. Please, speak your mind, my sweet.”

You took a steadying breath before you began. “Look, I’m so sorry for what I said. I was frustrated, and I lashed out. But that’s no excuse for it. I never in a million years should have said what I did. It was wrong and insensitive. And I do care for you so, so much on so, so many different levels. I’m sorry I ever made you doubt that. I will spend every day of the rest of my life reassuring you that I love you, Loki. I love you.”

“I accept your apology, and I love you, too.” A single tear rolled down his cheek, but you knew it was from happiness. After all, several tears of the same emotion had fallen down your own cheeks. “Now, it is my turn to say I am sorry. I was unreceptive, pushy, snappy, and cruel. I should not have responded in that manner, and I should have been more open to working through the problem. My insecurities got the better of me, but I promise I will try to keep them at bay. Because I have you, darling, and I love you. And I have no doubt that you do feel the same.”

“I forgive you, too, Loki. I’m ready to put this behind us if you are.”

“Absolutely I am,” he replied, smiling—really smiling—for what felt like the first time in a century. “And, if I may be so bold, I do believe we have a week’s worth of kisses to make up for.”

“The math checks out,” you giggled, leaning in. “I certainly wouldn’t be opposed if you wanted to start playing catch up now.”

“It is like you have read my mind.”

You gave him one quick peck on the lips before he pulled you flush against him and kissed you like there was no tomorrow. Maybe it was because he’d been so worried that there wouldn’t be. But, in the end, there was. Because you worked it out. Because you loved each other. Because you were two hearts connected as one in the crazy journey called life. And you’d always find a way to work through your differences. For, deep down, you both knew you were meant to be together, would always find your way back to each other. There was nothing either of you believed more, and you’d never doubt it again.

[jungwoniics]

: ̗̀➛ we get along just fine | nr { part 1 }

↦ pairing: nishimura riki / niki x reader ↦ genre: angst ↦ w/c: 1270 ↦ requested by: -

- y/n pov -

“class, we have a new student joining us from now on,” ms maeng announces. she gestures towards someone standing outside the classroom, and the girl emerges and stands next to the teacher’s desk.

“would you like to say a few words of introduction?”

“okay uhm, hi everyone! i’m eunji and i just moved here this weekend. it’s nice to meet all of you!” she says enthusiastically, contrasting to the shy vibes she gave off when she stepped in.

ms maeng gestures for her to take her seat next to me. she walks over to my table, slipping into her seat. “hi,” i greet her with a smile.

“hi!! wow, i love your bag! it’s so pretty,” she tells me as she looks at my bag.

“oh thanks.”

✦❘༻{ 𝐄𝐍– }༺❘✦

the bell rings. everyone rushes out of the classroom, hoping to get their food before the queues in the cafeteria get long.

just as i was about to leave the classroom, i notice how eunji seemed to be taking her time to pack her bag. “hey, uh, do you have anyone to sit with for break?” i ask her, walking back to our seats.

she shakes her head, clearly embarrassed. “no. people find me annoying and overly enthusiastic.”

“oh, that’s not true. being enthusiastic is a good thing anyway. besides, you’d love my good friend. he’s extremely enthusiastic. you’ll know it once you meet him. so come on,” i pull her up to her feet, rushing to the cafeteria.

✦❘༻{ 𝐄𝐍– }༺❘✦

“y/n!”

i turn around swiftly, making eye contact with a boy in the distance. “oh there he is!” i pull eunji through the crowd of students. we quickly take a seat at the table before another person could push us.

“oh hi!” the boy greets eunji. she just waves, unsure how to react.

dusting off my skirt, i clear my throat. “oh eunji, this is sunoo. sunoo, this is eunji. she’s new here.”

“ooh, welcome! hope you’ve had a good experience so far,” sunoo tells her with a wide smile. “yep!” she nods.

before any of us could say anything else, a couple of students leans against the table. we look around, noticing how the middle space was cleared and the students had all moved to the sides. even the students seated were now standing up.

“oh, you’ve gotta be kidding me,” i roll my eyes.

“what’s going on?” eunji asks me.

“it’s just this boy. he’s so-called the ‘popular’,” i tell her.

“judging by how everyone’s reacting, he must be really popular. what made him so popular even?”

“there was just this stupid dance competition and he participated. he showcased his ‘top-notch dancing’ and ‘stole the hearts of many’,” i explain, unable to stop myself from rolling my eyes. “at least that’s what i heard.”

and at that moment, he emerges. nishimura riki. he was my best friend. before the stupid dance competition. and the ‘top-notch dancing’. and the stealing of hearts. ugh. i used to call him niki, but now i don’t.

why?

because it used to be my nickname for him. me. it was a unique thing that kinda symbolised our friendship. but everyone calls him that now. it doesn’t mean anything anymore.

“did something happen between you two?” eunji suddenly asks, pulling me out of my thoughts.

“what? noooo don’t be ridiculous. i just don’t like guys who gets over their heads because of their fame,” i lie, faking a scoff.

at least it was partially true.

…

okay fine, here’s what happened.

- flashback -

“oh my god, niki, look!” i wave the paper in front of his nose.

“i can’t look if it’s that close to me!” he exclaims, snatching the paper out of my grasp.

“oh oops,” i just shrug.

we remain silent for a couple of moments as he read the contents of the poster. he puts it down, but doesn’t say anything. i had expected him to be more excited. way more excited.

“well? are you gonna take part?”

“uh… i don’t know, y/n… it says “best of best”. i’m not even one of the best,” niki says, placing the paper on the table.

i gasp at his response. “who are you?”

“oh come on,” niki rolls his eyes playfully.

“no, you come on,” i push his shoulder slightly. “when has being the best ever mean anything to you? you dance because you love it, not because you wanna be the best. i mean, sure, that comes along in the process. but that’s not your goal.”

i go on, and on, and on about how he should join the competition, not caring about the exasperated looks he was giving me. when i finally lose my breath, i stop.

“are you done?” niki asks, his eyebrow raised.

“no, but seeing that i’m out of breath, you may speak,” i say as i take a big gulp of water, making a lot of noise in the process.

“look, you made your point. i’ll sign up, but you have to come to watch me perform,” he whispers as if we were carrying out some illegal business.

i place my bottle on the desk, “what’re you whispering for? and obviously i’d come. watching you dance is my therapy.”

niki gives me a look of disgust and amusement. “niki, i’m joking. i don’t need therapy. i’m completely fine.”

✦❘༻{ 𝐄𝐍– }༺❘✦

[ two weeks later ]

it’s finally the competition day. niki has been practicing every day for the past two weeks. and i’ve told him every time that the choreography was perfect. obviously, he still insisted on practicing more. he even made me stay with him. that literally caused me to miss my bedtime like seven times. SEVEN.

YES I CHERISH MY SLEEP IS THAT SUCH A PROBLEM?

moving on…

it’s finally niki’s turn to perform. he walks up to the stage. although he was extremely tall for his age, he looked extremely small from here. he remains calm as he waits for the music to start. and as soon as it does, i could see the change in his expression which could only mean one thing.

he was ready.

i’m not even kidding when i say he rocked the stage. his performance was lit. and i couldn’t stop telling him that. everyone was at the edge of their seats as we waited for the winner to be announced.

“and in first place… NISHIMURA RIKI~”

the place erupts in claps and cheers for niki as he made his way up the stage to receive his trophy. “oh my god, it’s so cool,” i exclaim when niki lets me hold the trophy.

as amazing as it looked, it was really heavy. for a girl at least. and niki seemed to realise i was struggling with it because he immediately grabs hold of the trophy before it could pull me down.

✦❘༻{ 𝐄𝐍– }༺❘✦

monday came in a flash. and everything changed. the halls grew quiet as niki stepped into the building. before i could make my way to him, he was surrounded by the other students. everyone suddenly wanted to be his friend.

days passed, and i constantly spotted niki surrounded by a big group of students, mainly the other dancers. and i found myself distancing myself from him.

while he gained many friends that week, i lost the only friend i had.

- end of flashback -

anyway, that was when sunoo came into the picture. we were assigned partners for a geography project, and that allowed us to get to know each other better and we eventually became good friends.

✦❘༻{ 𝐄𝐍– }༺❘✦

・❥・ written by lia┊part 2┊ending

・❥・ enhypen masterlist┊blog navi┊❦ 7 hearts ❦

➵ taglist status: open — send an ask or comment!

[staynskz]

Making Amends: Part Two

Pairing: husband BangChan x female reader

Genre: slight angst, fluff

Word count: 2.2k+

Warning(s): none

At work, your boss realized how distracted you were. “Y/N, are you okay?” she asked, snapping you back to reality. “Huh? Oh… yeah I’m doing okay, just a bit deep in thought.” She stared at you with worried eyes. “It doesn’t seem like it. Look, why don’t you go home and get some rest for a few days while I work on the rest of the project, okay?” “What? No, it’s okay-I’m completely capable of completing the project, don’t worry, I-” “Y/N… you’re my hardest working employee. I’m sure it’ll be fine if you take some time off, okay? Why don’t you go home and stay with your kids for a bit and see how it goes. Maybe spend some time with them while they’re still small, hmm?”

She was right. You’d been so caught up in this project, you barely slept, ate, nor spent much time with children anymore. You thought the project was only going to last for a bit, but that was never the case with any project at work. “Are you sure?” you guiltily asked. “Yes, I’m sure! Now go! Enjoy the rest of your day off, hun!” As she shooed you out of the office, you walked out into the street and realized that you didn’t even remember how to have fun. You planned a small date for you and your kids. They for sure were going to have fun with you today. You were going to make memories they’d never forget.

After picking up the kids from Changbin’s house, you surprised them by going to the park near the house. It had been so long since you’d brought them here. It felt like a million years had gone by already. The three of you ate ice cream, played lava monster on the playground, and ate dinner together. The day was set as a memory you’d never forget. When the three of you got home later that evening, you saw that Chan’s car was in the driveway. It was weird that he was home so early. You weren’t displeased, but from the last conversation you both had, you weren’t so happy either. Either way, you inhaled deeply and went into the house.

Chan was sitting on the couch when the three of you trudged your way in. Aris and Eli both dropped their backpacks on the ground and ran over to Chan. “Daddy!!!” they screamed as they attempted to climb onto Chan’s lap. “Hi kiddos,” he said while grabbing them both and placing them on his lap. “Daddy, guess what mommy and us did today??” Aris asked Chan. “What is it? What did you and mommy do, hmm?” Eli cut his sister short as he started exaggerating every detail of the day. They were both so busy entertaining Chan that they forgot you were still standing by the door just watching them explain things to their dad.

Before the story could get any crazier, you decided to let them both know that it was time for bed, and that they needed to sleep so that they could wake up and go to uncle Binnie’s house tomorrow. “Awwww but I wanna stay up with you and daddy!!!” Aris complained while pouting. “Yeah!! You said we could do anything we want today!!” Eli chimed in tune with his sister. “Now, you both know how mommy is when she gets mad, you two. Why don’t you go shower tonight, and we can all ready a book together tonight, hmm?” Chan explained calmly to them. With a loud gasp, Aris said, “Can we read about the warriors who slay the dragon??!!!” “Noooo!!! I want to read about Cinderella,” Eli retorted. It was literally as if Aris was the brother and Eli was the sister from the way they both acted. It was too adorable. Chuckling, Chan obliged to read both stories to them. Running away happily, they took their bags from your hands and got ready to shower and end the day.

When the kids had finished showering, Chan laid in bed with them-both books in his hands. He really was going to read both books, wasn’t he? You just stood at the door watching your children smile while they laid across Chan’s lap. “Mommy?” Eli said interrupting your thoughts. “What is it, baby?” “Can you come lay with us?” Surprised, you stood awkwardly at the foot of the bed, looking at where to join the children and Chan on the bed without actually being near Chan. “Come on, mommyyyy, I want to get the story started!” Eli complained while you stood there-still looking like an idiot. “Mommy, just sleep by daddy!” Aris demanded while making some room by Chan on the bed.

Not wanting to waste any more time, you walked over to the side of the bed and joined Chan under the covers while the kids shifted their way around the two of you. It was awkward, to say the least. You were still struggling on how to sit next to Chan but could only lean back towards the wall behind you. It was the most uncomfortable feeling ever. The four of you sitting in your daughter’s small bed trying to find space just to read a simple bedtime story. “Mommyyy! Can you move, please? I don’t have any space,” Aris complained beside you. “Well mommy doesn’t have any space either, baby. Why don’t you sit on my lap, hmm?” “No, I don’t want to mommy. Why don’t you just lay on daddy’s shoulder like you always do?” The most awkward tension had been brought back by your sassy five-year-old daughter.

So it was true-toddlers were probably worse than teenagers because of their unruly filter. All that time, Chan just sat there laughing and giggling to himself under his breath with Eli. He truly did know how to get under your skin. Especially since you were both still not speaking to each other than about the kids. You shot a glare at Chan while adjusting yourself to compromise with your daughter.

It was hard getting intimate with Chan-even just putting your head on his shoulder. It had been so long since you’d both been intimate-whether it be holding hands or even making love. It just wasn’t there anymore. You missed it, to be honest. It was the hardest thing to admit. You wanted to be independent, show that you were tough, but all you wanted in all honesty was for Chan to hold you. You missed the way he would caress your body, the way he would kiss every inch of your body, make you feel his love through his actions, whisper sweet nothings in your ears, tell you how beautiful you were regardless of anything you thought of yourself. You missed those days. The days when you were both able to enjoy small moments together. “Are you comfortable, babe?” Chan asked, bringing you back to reality. Shocked by his sudden words, you whispered a simple yes without looking at him and you laid your head on his shoulder. “Okay, let’s begin, shall we?” Chan asked the kids as he opened your daughter’s favorite book. “Once upon a time, there were three kingdoms…” that was the last you’d heard while you could keep your eyes open.

The next thing you knew, you were waking up in your bed with Chan’s arms around your waist. He must’ve brought you to the bedroom after he read the books to the kids. Pulling his arms off you, you walked toward the bathroom to get ready for work. It was hard holding a grudge against Chan at times. Times where moments were so sweet and loving like last night. But one moment wouldn’t fix that. One moment can’t fix the lonely nights you cried in bed alone and cold. One moment can’t fix the many times you’d had to tell friends and family that Chan was busy at work while you were at family functions he promised he’d show up to. It had been going on for long enough. You did want to forgive him, but forgiveness had to come with change; that was the only compromise you’d ever needed from Chan. Regardless, you were going to try and make this work once you finished your unfinished project at work. There was too much at stake to lose the deal you were close to closing.

Dropping off the kids at Changbin’s house went smoothly and arriving at work seemed less stressful than previous weeks. Maybe your boss was right taking a day off definitely helped. “What are you doing here, Y/N?” you heard your boss’s voice behind you. “What do you mean what am I doing here? I’m here to work,” you said nonchalantly to your boss as she followed you into your office. “Y/N… when I said take some time off, I didn’t mean only half a day.” “…What do you mean?” you asked. “I meant take a few days off, Y/N. I can’t make my most hardworking employee burn out!” “But the project-I can’t just-” Taking the paperwork out of your hands, your boss quietly said to you, “it’s about time you and your hubby go on vacation, yeah?”

Vacation. That word was so foreign to you. It was so long ago since you’ve been on vacation. “I don’t think vacation’s a great idea since we’re trying to land this deal…” you said while trying to snatch the paperwork back. “Noooo… you do realize that they agreed to the deal, right?” “They did?!” “Yeah, they did. I don’t know how they came to a conclusion to work with us, but here we are.” “Wow… that makes me feel so much easier now,” you said while sitting down. “Good. So that means that I have to kick you out of this building just so you’ll take time off, right?” she asked as she grabbed your purse. “What? No, I need to-” “Ah! No. If you don’t listen to what I have to say, that means I’ll have to fire you just so you’ll stop living here, right?” “I mean…” “No-that’s what I thought. Please, Y/N, you need to leave this place for just a few days, okay?” “Please go home and rest while you can before we have to close another deal, okay?” She rushed you out of the office and blew a kiss before choosing the lobby floor for you in the elevator.

You couldn’t even catch sight of what was happening-just that your boss had given you the next few days off. Sounded good, though, since you needed it and wanted to catch up on a few projects back at home. You texted Changbin’s wife asking if they could keep the kids until the same time so that you could run some errands. With a sweet reply, she said yes.

Pulling into the garage, you saw that Chan’s car was still parked in the garage. Did he not go to work? Either way, you still didn’t want to talk about the situation with Chan. It was like you were both walking on eggshells- not just around the kids, but it you were both struggling to find a middle ground. It’s not like you were trying to make a point by not apologizing… okay maybe it was a bit of pride, but you also felt that Chan should’ve been more helpful as a husband and father.

Opening the door to your house, you saw that there were packed suitcases in the living room. Why were there suitcases? Was Chan leaving you? Was it the nightmare you wished would never happen? It made your stomach drop. No matter how independent you were, in this marriage, it only worked as a codependent relationship. Not only that, but as parents, it would be easier to work together in one home than in two-in most cases. Was Chan falling out of love with you? Was Chan going to leave you alone? Were you really going to be the single mother you’d always felt you’d been for the past few months?

As those thoughts were running through your mind, Chan walked into the room. “Hey, babe… let’s go.” “Go where?” you asked. “We’re gonna miss our flight.” “Our flight? What do you mean? I still have work, and the kids-” “I’ll explain on the way to the airport-” Chan said as he pulled you back into the garage and into his car along with the suitcases. On the car ride to the airport, you couldn’t help but ask so many questions. Where were the kids? Where were you guys going? What happened? Chan answered the questions with simple yet vague answers. It wasn’t helping your frantic mind at all.

Boarding the private jet, you weren’t ready to go anywhere-you were just worried about your babies. You knew you left them with Changbin and his wife, but you didn’t get to say goodbye before leaving to whatever destination Chan had been rushing you to go to. Taking a seat on the jet, you opened your mouth to ask Chan another question, but were hushed with his stern voice saying for you not to worry, and that you needed to get some rest before arriving at the destination. Furious at the vagueness of his answers, you turned toward the window and stared at the sky as the jet took off.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Author’s note: Here’s part two :) I’m just glad I’ve been having a bit more time to work on this with the few days I get off of work.

Tag list: @crispbang 

[fandomscombine]

The Hargreeves Kerfuffle  Part 1 : Disastrous Childhood (Prologue)

TUA Series Part 1:  Disastrous Childhood

The Hargreeves siblings x Hargreeves!Reader (Familial Relationship)

An idea came to me at 2am after binging TUA S2 and rewatching S1 right after!

BG: The Reader is Number Eight. It follows how you fit into the structure of Season 1 and the family dynamic of the siblings.

This part follows when the young Hargreeves Siblings had their powers manifested and the development of The Umbrella Academy.

Contains: Sibling Angst and Fluff. Reginald being a crappy father but sometimes not really?

The series will consist of 10 parts. Where the reader would have a focused interaction with each sibling. (Eg. After this part, it would be Luther x Reader, then Diego x Reader and so on! –Yes Ben is included)

WC:2649

A/N: This is my first ever TUA fic and I’m doing a series. WOw ambitious I know. Anyways I hope you enjoy! And tell me how you feel about it!

>>MASTERLIST<<

>>THE HARGREEVES KERFUFFLE SERIES MASTERLIST<<

READ: [PART 2]  [PART 3]  [PART 4]

>>JOIN MY WRITING CHALLENGE!<<

~

On October 1, 1989, 43 women across the globe gave birth despite them not being pregnant when the day began. In news of this mysterious happenings, Sir Reginald Hargreeves immediately went out of his way to find as many of these special babies. He has successfully adopted 8 of these children and you were one of them.

One might think that when a person adopts not one, but eight kids would have so much love to give but they would be mistaken. Sir Reginald Hargreeves—Dad, was not a loving father. It would be a miracle for one to see the man show any other emotion apart from anger. Sir Reginald Hargreeves was distant and treated the children like they were experiments that the dynamic felt closer to a doctor/patient relationship. The children weren’t given actual names, only to be called by their numbers based on the order Sir Reginald Hargreeves had procured them. It was only when Grace, their robot mother insisted they have a real name, were the children given them. And so, the children were:

Number One - Luther Hargreeves

Number Two – Diego Hargreeves

Number Three – Allison Hargreeves

Number Four – Klaus Hargreeves

Number Five – Five Hargreeves

Number Six – Ben Hargreeves

Number Seven – Vanya Hargreeves

And finally,

Number Eight -  y/n Hargreaves

For 6 years, the only special thing about the children was that they were miraculously conceived and birthed within a day, the same day. However, on the 7th year , October 1 1996, more strange things started to happen to the children.

It first started with Ben at breakfast. Dad as usual is cold and strict more so in the early morning. ‘Sit up straight Number Six.’ He directed without even a glance up from his newspaper at hand.

‘Yes Sir.’

Beside him you place your hand on his and whispered, ‘You alright Ben? You look sick.’

He gulped. ‘Yea y/n.’ Wiping the cold sweat off his forehead.

‘You sure?’ you questioned, not buying it.

‘Umhmm never bett-----’

You expected vomit to come out but what happen next is something you would never though was possible.

Screams broke out everywhere.

You feel yourself being raised above the table. Looking down, you were 5 feet off the ground held by what seemed to be tentacles.

‘Take that!’ You hear some shout then a thud. Diego had brought down a knife to the tentacle that had suffocated him and in now laying on the floor covered in green blood.

The sight finally snapped you out of your shock, your fight or flight reflexes kicked in.

A quick sweep of your surroundings showed Five and Klaus on either side of you, they too are struggling with the ever-tightening grip of the monstrous arm.

While on the ground, Vanya and Allison are making their way to Ben in hopes of helping him control whatever all this that was coming out of his body. While Luther is fighting off the arms away from Diego who seem to have broken his leg from the fall.

Dad, Mom and Pogo are nowhere to be seen.

You move your head to the left, knowing that Klaus doesn’t do well in small spaces. ‘Klaus it’s okay buddy, Dad would find a way to fic this. Just breathe’ You choked out ‘Just breathe Klaus, everything’s gonna be alright.’

‘mmmm!’ That was Klaus’ only reply but you were thankful to see him to fidget less. He seemed to have taken your advice – how much of the second part of that advice be true, you genuinely don’t know.

You try to move your head to face the right towards Five but no dice. The arm was wrapping itself closer to your neck. ‘Five’ you call out, but it was barely a whisper. ‘five..’

‘Y/N!!’ Five’s scream was the last thing you heard before everything went black.

~

‘She’s broken a couple of ribs and sprained her neck. But’s she’s gonna be okay. Just needs time to rest.’

‘And how long would that time Pogo?’

‘She would need to say in bed for 2 to 3 months, Sir.’

You open your eyes and are greeted with blinding white light. Dad, Mom and Pogo surround your bed.

Grace tucks a stray hair behind you ear. ‘My baby, y/n. How are you feeling?’

‘Sore.’ You reply, noting the coarse sound of your voice. ‘How’s Ben? Klaus? Vanya?—’

Grace cut you off. ‘They’re all fine y/n. Though Ben is a bit roughed up.’ She says truthfully.

‘Number Six has appeared to have powers of summoning monsters with his body and he is currently under supervision.’  Reginald stated.

But something didn’t fit right. ‘But how did you calm him down? The whole fiasco back there was in total chaos?’ Voicing out all your thoughts and questions. ‘No one could get him to take back control, unless…..’ You couldn’t continue the thought. Your eyes go wide. There was no way. It was too harsh, but it was dad after all, he would do whatever means necessary to get what he wants.

Your dad smiles proudly ‘Ah yes. Y/n ever the cleverest of the bunch.’ You had observed that he had addressed you in your actual name instead of your number for the first time in your whole existence.  ‘Unfortunately, I had to sedate Number Six. You do understand that it was the only way.’

You open your mouth to argue.

‘No buts, Number Eight!’ Ah and now we’re back to number, you thought.

‘I’ll have Grace by you side whist you recover and Pogo here would relay your recovery progress to me daily.’

He was almost to your door when he faced you again. ‘Oh and Number Eight, When you feel something different or unusual. Do inform me of it immediately.’ And with that he left.

‘Pogo? What does he mean by feel different?’ Your nerves go up, worried about your siblings. ‘Is anyone hurt?’

Pogo sighs, after much contemplation he begins ‘Y/n dear. Today’s happenings uncovered that there are stranger yet special things about you children.’

You nod, not wanting to interrupt but also wishing he would hurry up and continue.

‘Ben isn’t the only one who have gotten powers today. During the kerfuffle, Diego has shown skill with a knife, Luther immense strength and Five had shown ability to teleport.’

Once again you found yourself in shock.

‘Your father has gotten the idea that you children have varying power wish are “activated” so to speak when reached the age of 7.’

‘Haha-OW’ You clutch your side.

‘Careful y/n, try not to do sudden movements—yes and that includes laughing too.’ Mom says, caressing your cheek.

‘When can I see them?’

‘I’ll try to persuade Reggie to allow them for a visit dear. But now I need you to rest.’

~

Sibling Visits are limited to 30 mins a day, right before the bedtime curfew.

All your siblings (expect Ben who was still under strict supervision and is recovering himself) came to see you the following night.

Allison was the first one through your door and ran to give you a hug. ‘Y/n! We are all so worried!’

‘Aww thanks—OW OW OW’

‘Oops sorry’ releasing you from her death grip of a hug.

Seeing that movements still hurt you. The rest opted not to hug you, Klaus and Diego held your hand, Vanya is sitting on the edge of you bed, Luther gave you forehead a quick kiss and Five being Five, greeted you with the typical sibling teasing. ‘Glad to see you not drop dead in front of me.’

Diego showed off his leg cast and asked you to sign it, which you happily did so. Signing ‘Badass as always. -y/n’ beside Ben’s note of ‘Diego is cooler than Batman’

The 30 minutes consisted recaps of what happened the day before, the gushing of the boys showcasing their powers and debating on who’s the most powerful.

And just like that, the time was up and each had to go to bed. Everyone kissed your head for goodnights, even Five.

‘You know I love you right?’ His eyes softer than you ever seen before

‘I know’

‘You really scared me yesterday when you blacked out.’ Five had his tough façade down. ‘I thought you died y/n.’

‘But I didn’t.’ You reach up to wipe his tears away. ‘It’d take something bigger, if you wanna get rid of me.’

He chuckled. ‘Night, y/n’

‘Good night, Five.’

~

3 weeks had passed, and your siblings never failed to visit you. Over that time, Klaus and Allison had manifested their powers. Klaus can conjure the dead while Allison could ‘rumor’ people to her will.

Ben came by 2 weeks later. His color is back to normal, not like the blueish tint it had the last time you saw him. Though he still had a few remnants of bruises and scars across his arms and face.

‘I’m sorry y/n.’ He said leaning on your door frame.

‘Ben!’ You exclaimed. ‘I’m so glad you’re back up and running!’

Ben was caught off guard. ‘You—You’re not mad at me?’

‘Why would I be mad at you?’ You questioned, genuinely confused at your brother’s words.

‘Cause, Cause I almost got you killed. I am a monster.’

You sat up straight at those words, your ribs hurt a bit at the sudden movement, but you didn’t care. Your brother was blaming himself for something he couldn’t have controlled.

‘NO BEN!’

Ben jumped from your sudden outburst.

You motioned for him to come closer.

‘Ben…’ looking into his eyes. ‘Ben you are no monster.’

‘But—’

‘uuh uh I’m not done’ You held his hand in yours. ‘You are no monster what happened then was an accident, nobody knew, heck nobody expected powers to just show up. It was beyond anyone’s control. It took us by surprise.’

His shoulders relaxed.

‘It wasn’t your fault. I don’t blame you for what happened.’

He gave you a bone crushing hug. ‘Thank you y/n. You don’t know how guilty I was feeling.’ Voice muffled by your shoulder, which is now wet with his tears. ‘I kept thinking about the pain I caused you and I wasn’t allowed to leave my room even when I begged dad to see you and say sorry. y/n’

‘Shhh shhh’ Rubbing his back. ‘It’s alright Ben. What’s important is that we’re all here now. Alive, Safe and sound.’.

~

You still have a month left for recovery.

Only you and Vanya are the one left who haven’t had their powers revealed.

Dad had created a group called ‘The Umbrella Academy’ in which he trained your super powered siblings. He even given them codenames to go along with their newfound powers.

Number One - Luther Hargreeves aka Spaceboy

Number Two – Diego Hargreeves aka The Kraken

Number Three – Allison Hargreeves aka The Rumor

Number Four – Klaus Hargreeves aka The Séance

Number Five – Five Hargreeves aka The Boy

Number Six – Ben Hargreeves aka The Horor

With this new training program comes with the downside of spending less time with your siblings. Your traditional Sunday afternoon sister bonding time Allison and Vanya is basically non-existent now. Sure the rest of siblings still drop by to check up on how you’re recovering but it is not as frequency as they once were- you totally understand though, it must be tiring to be part of ‘The Umbrella Academy’ but girl were you still hurt and wanted more than anything to be a part of it.

So, you spend most of your time with Vanya nowadays. You didn’t mind, it is nice to have someone along. Most of the time Vanya practices her violin in your room.

‘That was beautiful Vanny’ you commented after she finished a rendition.

‘Thanks y/n’ Her face flushed. ‘Maybe someday I’d be a famous violinist!’

‘I know you would.’ You say truthfully. ‘And I better get the best seats at your concerts okay? Nothing short of VIP treatment for your favourite sister!’

‘Don’t worry, I’ll make sure Allison would get that.’ Vanya teased.

Placing a hand dramatically to your chest ‘uhh I am offended! I thought I was your favourite sister!’

‘well... you thought wrong.’ Vanya tried to keep a straight face but failed. ‘You y/n are the VVIP guest!’

‘Now that’s more like it.’

~

That night you were tossing and turning in your bed.

In the training room, huge boulders were being tossed onto Luther’s back. He currently had 3 on him. ‘More’ he cried. It was an impressive feat to see. A 7-year-old carry the what had to be at least 5 times his weight.

It was at his 6th block when his legs start to shake.

‘Straighten up Number One!’ Reginald voice came through the speakers.

‘I-I’

‘Fix your posture! And stop babbling!’

He was trembling all over, the weight was far too much and carried far too long for just a young boy.

Any second now, he is gonna be crushed by the boulders.

‘LUTHER!’ You screamed. Cold sweat was plastered all over your face. You were still in your room- but it all felt so real.

You look over to your bedside table, 9:07

Training would have started an hour ago. You had time.

You took the stairs two at a time, bursting into the training room. ‘STOP’

Reginald stood from his seat. ‘Number Eight. What in the world are you doing here?’

‘STOP! Luther is gonna get hurt please stop it--.’ Ignoring his question.

‘Number Eight, what are you talking about? Number One is doing perfectly fine!’ He gestured towards the front.

He was right. Luther looks fine. In fact it looked like it was carrying a light backpack instead of 3 boulders. ‘But- But I saw—’ Then it hit you 3 boulders. 3 not 6.

‘More’ You heard him cried out, just like you had in your nightmare.

You stared at Luther, how could this be?

‘I saw him sir, he is gonna collapse from 6 boulders.’

At this, Reginald took interest. ‘You saw?’

‘Yes, I-I must have dreamt it.’ You slumped against the free chair, defeated. ‘but it felt so real.’

‘Let me everything you saw, and don’t miss a single detail’

And so, you did. By the time you finished, Luther was with his 6th block.

It was exactly like how things went down in your dream. ‘No No NOOOO!’

‘Release him!’ Reginald called at the last second. Standing he faced you. ‘Now y/n dear would you please come with me.’

He didn’t speak again until you were both in his office. ‘It seems to me Number Eight that your powers have finally manifested.’

‘what—’

‘A slight delay compared to your siblings, but I presume that it was due to you recovering from your injuries that your body had focus on your recovery first then powers.’

‘What about Vanya? Would she have powers?’

‘It seems that Number Seven has no powers gained.’ Standing in front of you. ‘But no matter now, what’s important is that you’ve got them.’ He placed his hands on your shoulders. ‘You would do great things Number Eight. To see into the future is a valuable asset to have indeed. For this I shall name you Foresight.’

This was it! You own codename!

Number Eight -  y/n Hargreaves aka Foresight.

‘I’m gonna be part of The Umbrella Academy?’ Overjoyed by your father taking pride in you that every other thought left your concern.

‘Yes Foresight. You will.’ Standing straight again. ‘However, your training would only start once you have fully recovered.’

‘Thanks Dad.’ Hugging him and for once showed the affection back.

You wish you could say that it was at this point where you and your siblings finally gotten a loving and healthy childhood. But you were wrong. Things only deteriorated from here on out with the Hargreeves household and by extension the dissolve of The Umbrella Academy.

END OF PART 1

READ: [PART 2] [PART 3]  [PART 4]

Taglist [All]: @gruffle1

Taglist [TUA]: @herecomesthesun1969  @ultraviolet-m​ @winterierwriter @lordofthunderthr​  @alabaster1223

[txemrn]

The Picture Show

Book: TNA

Rating: fluffy; smidge of sensuality, smidge of angst

Word count: exactly 2000

A/N: Oof! I wanted to participate in wacky drabbles #102 this week, but long story short, the week got away from me, and I am painfully late in posting! That's okay, though! It's going up anyway, and I'm sure they won't mind me using their prompt (prompt will be in bold)! Huge thanks to @kat-tia801 for brainstorming this fic with me, and thank you to @chemist-ana for pre-reading (and convincing me it wasn't dumb lol). As always, these characters belong to our friends at Pixelberry (also, Caroline is the name I've given Sam's first wife; even though we know her real name now, old habits die hard... wow, pun not intended!).

***

A crisp, cool breeze manifests a gentle oasis for the gathered movie-goer crowd on the humid city street. Waiting in line to purchase tickets for their impromptu date night, Brynn casually ties a knot in the front of her knit band tee, exposing a thin strip of her Tuscany-sun-kissed skin. Finger-combing her almond waves, she tosses her careless strands into a perfectly teased bun to enjoy the reprieve from the stifling August heat.

“You’re making this too easy for me.” The familiar, smoky whisper sends a pleasure-filled jolt down Brynn’s spine as his breathy chuckles tickle her ear. His fingertips pad across her midriff, tucking his sizable hand into the front of her jeans. His other hand cups around her head as he presses his plump pout to the sensitive spots of her neck. “So, what’ll it be tonight: Melissa McCarthy telling jokes for two hours or scary paranormal demons?”

“The difference being?” Brynn jokes, pulling Sam’s hand out of her pants, lacing her fingers with his.

“Touché,” he chuckles, hiding a wide grin. Their lips meet together for a simple kiss just as the ticket booth attendant motions for them to approach. After collecting their tickets for the latest horror flick, the young couple approach the concession counter. “Wanna share a popcorn?”

Brynn’s eyes light up as she eagerly nods her head. “And gummy worms, please!”

“You are just as bad as the boys--”

“What does that mean?” Brynn jovially pinches Sam, aiming for his chest.

“Let’s just say that gummy worms were never on the weekly grocery list until you came around,” he smirks, raising an eyebrow while guarding his nipples.

“See? I improved your life in more ways than one,” Brynn quips.

Sam lets out a hearty laugh, pulling Brynn’s body closer to his. “Mmmm--” he kisses one side of her neck, “--so many--” he kisses the other side of her neck, his hand grazing the curve of her ass, “--different--” he suddenly squeezes hard, making Brynn yelp, “--ways--” he captures her lips in a hungry kiss.

A clearing of a throat abruptly interrupts the moment. “‘Scuse me, but did you want butter on your popcorn, sir?” Sam’s cheeks burn red as Brynn chuckles through a nod. “That’ll be twenty-eight eighty-one.”

Sam quickly double-takes as he pulls out his wallet. “I’m sorry,” he grins politely, “did you say almost thirty dollars? For popcorn and gummy worms?”

“And your wife wanted a large Coke Zero.”

Brynn smiles brightly as she dramatically slurps on a straw. “Yes, husband, your wife wanted a large Coke Zero,” she sardonically mimics the concession worker, batting her eyes innocently.

Sam lowers his voice. “For thirty dollars?”

“Actually for twenty-eight eighty-one,” the teenage attendant corrects.

“You’ll have to excuse him,” Brynn pats Sam’s chest, winking at him endearingly before turning her attention to the cashier. “He hasn’t been to the movies since de Blasio took office.”

The attendant gives a confused look. “Who?”

Brynn stifles a laugh. “Exactly.” She looks warmly up at Sam as he boops her on the nose, grinning smugly at her. She puts her hand in his hand that is holding his wallet. “I’ve got this, old man.”

“Absolutely not.” Sam pulls his hand away from hers. “What kind of gentleman do you take me for?”

“Sam, it’s not a big deal,” she reaches for his wallet. “You are always paying. Let me do this tonight. My treat.” He quickly snatches his wallet, lifting it above her head while shaking his head. “Samuel!” she titters, stretching to grab his wallet. “Why are you being so difficult? Put that away.”

“Brynn, c’mon, there are people waiting--”

“Exactly. Let me pay.” She pushes her petite body in front of Sam’s as she reaches for her own wallet. “Here, sir,” she motions to the cashier as she begins to pull out two twenty-dollar bills.

“No. Brynn!” Sam loops his arm in front of Brynn’s body, shielding her from pulling her money out. “Stop that!” He turns to the concession attendant. “Here, take my card--”

Brynn swats at Sam's hand, accidentally knocking his wallet out of his grasp, the contents of the billfold dumping out onto the counter. Brynn cups her mouth, laughing at an irritated Sam who is taking a large deep breath, pinching the bridge of his nose. She quickly hands her money to the attendant before turning her attention to Sam. “C’mon, let’s get this cleaned up--”

And suddenly, there it was, splayed out for both Sam and Brynn to see together: a picture of Sam’s late wife. In the nude.

Sam quickly snatches the picture up as well as his cards and cash, hoping Brynn didn't notice. When he looks back up, Brynn is already giving their tickets to the attendant to be admitted into the theater.

She noticed.

“Brynn--”

“I--I think I’m gonna need some more napkins,” she nervously interrupts, an out-of-breath pant to her voice.

“Ma’am? There are napkins inside," helpfully offered a worker.

“Oh,” Brynn appears defeated, refusing to look at Sam. “I’ll go grab our seats then,” she offers, power-walking away from her boyfriend.

“Brynn? Brynn?” His voice carries over the bustling hallway, but she doesn’t slow down. Once in the theater, Brynn anxiously stumbles in the low-lighting, picking out seats. Catching up to her, Sam’s hands kindly grip her shoulders. “Brynn. Please. Talk to me.”

She cordially smiles at him. “Talk about what?” She sits down, nervously pawing to open her bag of gummy worms.

Sam steals the bag of candy from Brynn. “Are you seriously going to pretend that didn’t just happen?”

“Pretend that what didn’t just happen--”

Putting his hands on his hips, he raises his voice. “You seeing my wife’s tits.” With the sudden cascade of snickers and gasps from fellow patrons turning to stare, Brynn grabs Sam’s arm, yanking him down into his seat.

Sam leans over, whispering into Brynn’s ear. “Please, let’s just talk about this--”

“There’s nothing to talk about, Sam,” her eyes stare intently at the large white screen.

“You’re mad.”

“I’m not mad.” Brynn begins wringing her hands as her foot nervously bounces. “I just,” she sighs before becoming quiet, her voice audibly shaking, “I--I didn’t know. I mean--damnit, Sam, you keep a photo of her in your wallet?”

“Of my wife?" He enunciates, making Brynn feel foolish. "Is that wrong of me?”

“No,” Brynn’s lower lip begins to tremble, “yes? I--I don’t know, Sam. I don’t know what I’m supposed to think right now. I figured you'd have a picture of her. Just with, uh, I mean. She would be, um--"

"Clothed?" Sam smirks.

Brynn gradually looks into Sam's eyes, but finds herself abruptly avoiding his gaze as questions flood her mind. Why would he be keeping a nude photo of his late wife? How often does he look at it? Is that even her business to know? To care?

The house lights turn down as the roar of advertisements brightly flood the screen. Brynn rests her chin in her hand, fighting tears. Even though the excitement of the music and vivid colors enthralls the audience, Brynn is a million miles away. She feels completely confused as to how to feel about this situation. Was she even allowed to be upset about this? Why couldn’t things just be simple for once in their relationship?

“Brynn?” Sam beckons for her from the clouds, bringing her back to reality. He lifts up the armrest between them. Wrapping an arm around her shoulders, he pulls her into his chest, peppering her hair with kisses.

As the movie ends, Sam and Brynn remain silent, making their exit to the streets of New York. After a few blocks, Sam stops, sensing Brynn’s heightened emotions. He can tell she’s still bothered by what happened before the movie.

He sighs heavily. “Let’s talk about it.”

Brynn lets go of his hand, scoffing, spinning around to see if anyone was watching. After a few moments of silence, she can feel the heat budding in her cheeks. She crosses her arms, and while staring at Sam, she lets out an inaudible ‘okay’.

With sincerity in his voice, Sam locks eyes with Brynn. "I honestly haven't looked at that picture in months. I completely forgot that I even had it. But--” he hesitates for a second, choosing his words wisely, “--throwing it away seems like the wrong thing to do."

"Caroline* and I didn't have sex until our wedding night." Brynn's eyebrows furrow before her eyes widen in shock. Sam continues. "She wanted to wait until marriage, especially given," he takes a deep breath, "my past--which you know about." Brynn nods. "But then the night before our wedding,” a smile blossoms across his face in remembrance, “she gifted me this wallet. With this picture. She said it was her promise to me--her all to me. I know you see a nude picture. But,” he sighs nervously as his eyes glaze with tears, “it’s always been so much more than that.”

Brynn considers his words, a warm smile growing on her face. She finally holds out her hand, for Sam to take. “Let’s go home.”

The next night, Brynn did bedtime alone with the boys. The penthouse had been fairly quiet throughout the day, even after Sam came home late from work. There is still an awkwardness in the air, and even though Brynn and Sam weren’t angry with each other, they also didn’t know what to say.

Closing the twin’s bedroom door, Brynn quietly tiptoes to the home office in her robe, knowing Sam is lost in his paperwork. She cautiously knocks on the door. After a few moments, the door whips open, Sam grabbing Brynn and jerking her inside.

“Since when do we knock on doors, babe?” Sam sits back into his leather tufted chair, pulling Brynn onto his lap, endearingly rubbing circles on her lower back.

“I--I wasn’t sure if you were busy, or--or if you--”

Sam holds his hand over her mouth, a smile growing across his face. “You know better.” He grabs her hand, kissing the back of it. “Now, what’s going on?”

Brynn coyly looks up at Sam, clearly nervous to ask her next question. “Can I see your wallet?”

Sam’s face falls, his Adam’s apple bobbing. “Why?”

“I want to see it.”

Sam can’t bring his attention to Brynn. He never removed that photo of his first wife, nor did he know how Brynn was currently feeling about the nude picture. All he does know is he better pull out his wallet. And start praying for mercy.

Brynn stands up, circling around Sam’s office chair. Sam reaches in his back pocket, pulling out the wallet. Brynn wraps her arms around his shoulders, brushing her nose against his ear. “Open it,” she commands with a sensual, husky tone.

Sam dutifully opens his wallet to the plastic picture holder. His cheeks begin to swelter with pink growing down his neck. He can feel a queasiness growing in his gut as he lays it out for Brynn to see.

“Aren’t you going to look?”

“Brynn?” He throws off her arms, becoming irritated. “What kind of game--?”

And that’s when he sees it: a picture of his stunning girlfriend, carefully photographed in the nude with her hands posing perfectly across her assets.

Sam’s eyes quickly dart around the room, finding Brynn locking the door and uncinching her robe. Letting the fabric pool on the floor, she straddles her naked body across his lap, his hands unable to resist.

Brynn grabs the wallet, pulling out the nude photos of herself and Sam’s first wife. “This may have been her promise to you, and you can keep it for as long as you want,” Brynn pulls out her photo, handing it to Sam. "But, this. This is my promise to you, Sam Dalton." She leans over, stealing his breath with a fervent kiss. “I love you.”

Cupping her cheek, Sam’s eyes gather tears as he looks admirably at his new forever. “I love you, too.”

***

Tags: @ao719 @charlotteg234 @chemist-ana @choiceskatie @forallthatitsworth @jessiembruno @kat-tia801 @khoicesbyk @lovelyladyk88 @lucy-268 @neotericthemis @nestledonthaveone @phoenixrising308 @sfb123 @shannonwrote @shewillreadyou @taniasethi @thefrenchiemama

[ah-ga-seven]

Till’ The End of Summer - Chapter 2

>> series masterlist <<

Pairing: Choi Yeonjun x Reader

In a Nutshell: College!AU, Rich Kids, Friends to Lovers, Fuckboy athlete Yeonjun, Overprotective Best friend Soobin, contains all of TXT and other Idol cameos, Omnipresent perspective.

Synopsis: You and Yeonjun are caught up in a cat and mouse game because of unspoken feelings and endless pining for each others’ attention. With the summer break approaching and lots of college parties, will you finally get a chance to explore your feelings for each other; even though the world and Yeonjun’s reputation makes things complicated?

Word count: 7.2K

Genre: Angst, Fluff.

Cameos: NCT Johnny, Ateez Wooyoung, ITZY Ryujin & Yeji.

Warnings: Heavy drinking, sexual implications, arguing and conflict.

A/N: English isn’t my first language, pls don’t come for me ;)

“Dang,” Soobin exclaims as you get in the car. He turns around to check out your attire, make-up and jewelry.  

You chuckle crossing your legs and posing for them dramatically. “How you like that?”  

Mia looked at you with proud eyes as she nods checking you out. “I approve,” she practically yells. She probably already had a few shots at home before she left judging by her enthusiasm.

“I don’t,” Soobin raises his eyebrows and Mia rolls her eyes at him. “Ok grandpa, how about we just get going.”

Soobin pouts at Mia’s comment and in order to calm him down she gives him a quick peck on the lips.  

You smiled at the two of them, hoping that one day you get to have what they have.

The remainder of the car ride was filled with laughter. You guys were singing, or should you say, screaming along to the music that was blaring through the speakers. The time practically flew by and before you knew it, the three of you had arrived at the entrance of the huge rustic looking frat house.  

You had never been here before, and you were amazed to say the least.  Your jaw dropped in awe of the size of the house. It was like a damn villa.

Sometimes you forget that 90% of the people at your school are rich brats who only got into this college because of their parents’ hefty wallets. You forget because you on the other hand, actually worked your ass off to get where you are without being an athlete or curing cancer in your spare time.

It suddenly made you think of Yeonjun again, about how little you actually knew of him. How did he get into this school? Was he already here? Who did he come with?

Soobin snaps you out of your daydream as he opens the car door for you. “The escort service is on the second floor,” he jokes helping you get out of the car.

You slap him on his chest but take his hand anyway. You’re used to his low key protective behaviour by now, so nothing really bothers you anymore. “Keep those snarky comments coming boy, I still have your whole embarrassing childhood to expose to your lovely girlfriend,” you say as the three of you start walking to the front door.

Soobin just shoots you a glare as he instinctively wraps an arm around Mia’s waist. “Don’t you dare,” he says pouting, making you and Mia laugh in response.  

The door opens with a dramatic swing and a tall, handsome-looking dude with sharp features greeted you with the warmest smile ever. It made you giddy inside, and you cursed at yourself for how easily impressed you are by any type of tall man.  

You could hear the loud music and feel the base send vibrations through your spine. You looked past his tall figure and noticed how the house was packed with people already.

“Sooooob, what's up my man,” he exclaims pulling him in for a bro-hug, Soobin smiled at Johnny fondly. “This is my girlfriend Mia, and this is y/n, my best friend” he explains, introducing both of you.  

“His single, best friend,” Mia chimed in giggling.

Your eyes grow wide and you slap Mia’s arm in response. “Don’t mind her. She has the alcohol tolerance of an underweight toddler,” you joke apologetically, which earned loud laughter from the tall guy who was dressed in white jeans accompanied with a loosely hanging Hawaiian blouse which was almost completely unbuttoned. Classic.

“Well, it’s a pleasure. I’m Johnny, feel free to make yourself at home. The booz and snacks are in the kitchen,” he said smirking, obviously checking you out from head to toe. “Come in,” he stepped aside so the three of you could walk in. You had to admit. He was charming. But as soon as your eyes landed on Yeonjun sitting on the couch with Beomgyu,  Hueningkai and Taehyun next to him, you completely forgot about Johnny’s existence.

He looked absolutely ravishing. When he wasn’t wearing baggy sweatshirts and sweatpants he actually had an incredible fashion sense.  

He was wearing a satin black button-up blouse that loosely hugged his figure, paired with dark denim jeans. He had his signature hoop earrings in, while also wearing a chained LV necklace and bracelet to go with it. You forgot to breathe for a second, and your eyes meet for the first time that night.

His eyes were looking around the room before his gaze lingered on your figure. His mouth fell agape slightly. And he swallowed harshly looking at your attire. “Damn,” he says under his breath. It was inaudible to you but you could tell what he was saying.

You silently take the win and smile at him knowingly.

You hadn’t even realised yet how nicely the house was decorated and just how crowded the place was. Your eyes reluctantly leave Yeonjun’s dark orbs to look around the living room and quickly noticed that Soobin and Mia had already abandoned you to get drinks. How nice of them.

You awkwardly look around and make your way to your friends, who were all sitting on the same couch, not noticing how most of the people there were staring at you as you made your way through the crowd.

“Isn’t it past your bedtime?” You joke as you give Hueningkai a nudge on the shoulder.

He scoffed in response. “You need to stop babying me,” you gasp, mocking him. “Never.”

He just smiled at you, giving you a quick hug.  “It’s good to see you,” he hums into the hug, and you smile at him as you let go.

“Wow y/n you look incredible,” Beomgyu says smiling up at you, Taehyun nods in agreement giving you a warm smile as well. “Total bad bitch,” Taehyun adds giving you a thumbs up.

“Thanks,” you chuckle, absentmindedly looking around for a place to sit.

Beomgyu noticed and got up so you could sit down instead of him, as there was no place left on the couch. Instead, he sat down on Yeonjun’s lap, who still hadn’t said a word to you since you walked in. For a quick second, you wish it was you on his lap, but then you notice that all he does is stare at you. Given the fact that you were feeling yourself tonight, you just stare back at him, which made him smirk in response. He licked his lips, ready to break the silence before Johnny appears in front of you with two red cups in his hands.  

“For the lady,” he says handing one of the cups to you.  

You look up in surprise, giving him a friendly smile as you accept the cup. “Thank you, that’s really thoughtful,” you say a little too flirty and you instantly curse at yourself for not having control over your tone of voice; even though you’re completely sober.  You take a sip, realising it’s your favourite. It made you look up at Johnny and he just smirked at you knowingly.  

“Thanks…” you say taking another sip, giving Johnny a smile that he could think about for the rest of the night.

You could feel Yeonjun’s eyes bore in to the back of your head. He was paying attention and what you would do next would determine the tone you had set for that night. So you knew you had to escape.  

“I’m gonna look for Mia, I remember I had to tell her something, If you could just excuse me for a second,” you said apologetically getting up. You pull your dress down a little trying not to expose your ass cheeks.

“That’s okay, the night is still young,” Johnny smiled at you brightly. It wasn’t the creepy type of smile or comment though. The tone in his voice was overbearingly friendly. His aura made you want to get closer to him. As friends though.

You smile at him and walk off, making your way through the way too large house looking for your friend.

You finally find her and Soobin in the kitchen with a bunch of other people. You recognise a few of them, but you couldn’t be bothered enough to greet them first as you grab a hold of Mia’ arm.

“Oh hey, y/n! They have jello shots. Look!” She wiggles the shot in front of you and you could tell she had at least 5 of them already.

“Bitch, fuck your jello, I’m not off to a great start,” you say whining.

Soobin turns around, suddenly interested when he sensed the desperate tone in your voice. He was eating some type of chocolate pudding.

He smacked his lips a couple of times before he decided to chime in. “What do you mean?”

You ignore Soobin and focus on Mia only. “I could tell he wanted to say something, but then Johnny appeared in front of me like I was in some type of Disney movie. It’s like the guy is glowing?” You say animatedly wiggling your fingers around to mimic sparks flying to make Mia’s drunken state understand better.

“Johnny is a great guy,” Soobin states butting into the conversation. “He’s into you, just date him.”

Mia just giggled, nothing was registering to her. Fuck. She was drunk. Too drunk to give you rational advice.  

“Jesus Soobin, how do you even know that?”  

“Because he came over here and asked us what your favourite drink was. He’s trying to impress you, so I just gave him a little nudge in the right direction. And like I said, he’s a great guy. Date him.”  

You roll your eyes at his pushiness. You don’t know what it is, but the more Soobin tries to push you into one direction, the more you don’t want to follow. It’s like you’re a defiant teenager while he’s the parent. It made you want to act out even more. It’s childish, you know that. But the fact that he even played matchmaker between you and Johnny was doing the most.

“I saw you cozying up to Yeonjun today at the park you know.”

“Oh did you now,” you roll your eyes at him.

“Damn it y/n,” Soobin took a step closer to you. He was getting mad and you could tell. Mia turned to her boyfriend giving him a warning look.

“I’m trying to befriend him. I literally had my legs draped over Beomgyu’s and you don’t bat an eye, but I can’t even talk to Yeonjun before you jump to all of these conclusions!?” You were raising your voice at him to get your point across but Soobin wasn’t having it.

“You didn’t admit your feelings for Beomgyu to me now did you,” he bites back at you.

“You’re being so fucking annoying right now, I told you not to worry about it,” you yell back at him, making Mia flinch in the process.

“What’s going on here?”  

His voice startles you and you feel his hand on your shoulder.  

You look up and see Yeonjun standing by your side, almost protectively standing between you and Soobin.

“Oh hey,” Soobin said, calming down at the sight of his friend.

“So much for a fun night,” Mia pouted, tugging at Soobin’s fingers.

Soobin just blinked a couple of times, apologetically looking into his girlfriends’ eyes. He tried to look you in the eye as well but you avoid his gaze.  

“Nothing,” you say stoically. “I was just about to leave.”

Yeonjun’s eyes grew big. “Leave? You just got here all of five minutes ago?”  

You sigh. “I meant, leave the kitchen,” you say waving your arms around.

Yeonjun didn’t quite understand what was going on, but he could tell that you were tense. He contemplated asking about it one more time because he was curious. But decided against it, not wanting to push you over the edge.

Instead, he nudged your shoulder. “Wanna go take a walk?” he asked giving you a hopeful look.

You visibly relax at his request, your heart skipped another beat and you just nod at him in response.

“I-” Soobin starts, but he doesn’t finish his sentence. He knew he was going overboard with it. And if he pushed another one of your buttons, you might just swing at him for real this time. He figured he just had to trust your judgment for once. Even though he knows of your terrible track record of dating incompetent men.

You send him a glare before boldly taking Yeonjun by his hand and leading him out of the kitchen with you.

You sigh in relief as fresh air fills your lungs when you step outside. The temperature had dropped so much since this afternoon. A shiver ran down your spine and Yeonjun noticed.

He turned to you. “Wait here ok,” he said confusing you as he ran off.  

Did he just leave you out here? Alone? What the fuck.

Not even 15 seconds later he returns with a leather jacket. He ran up to you and covered you with it.  

You stare at him in silence. Dumbfounded by his chivalry. You couldn’t help but blush, and you curse at yourself as you do so.  

“T-thanks,” you say fixing your hair.  

“It’s nothing, I realised I had the jacket in the trunk of my car,” he says giving you a warm smile.

God damn it. You melt once again. He’s making it too hard for you to stay away. But why would you?  

He hasn’t given you a reason to. Nor did he give you any red flags. The whole’ he’s a fuckboy and doesn’t want a relationship’ story didn’t add up.

“Are you okay?” Yeonjun asked cautiously, trying not to tick you off.  

You shrug absentmindedly. “Soobin is just getting on my nerves.”

He nods, noticing how he should probably drop the topic, but he decides against it.

“You know. He talks about you so much. About your adventures from your childhood, the trips you took together, everything. I can tell he loves you a lot. I don’t know what your fight was about but I don’t think you should be too mad at him. He’s just trying to look out for you,” Yeonjun says carefully. He knows he’s overstepping a little bit, but he doesn’t care. He hates to see Soobin upset, so he’d try his best to meddle between you two.

Oh Yeonjun. If only he knew that the fight was about him. And here he is, sticking up for Soobin even though he is trying to make Yeonjun out to be the asshole.

“Also, I am just starting to get to know you more and more. Soobin is our only connection, if you two fight, then when will I be able to see you hmm?” He says chuckling.  

Wow, okay. His flirty self is back again.

You laugh at the cute shift in his personality. “Don’t worry, I’ll pencil you into my busy schedule if you’d like.”

Yeonjun throws his head back in laughter. “When Soobin talks about you, he makes you seem so chill and funny, it made me want to get to know you better. But now that I’m with you all you seem to do is flirt with everyone.”

You stop in your tracks giving him a look of confusion, but you can’t help but laugh. “Flirt? With everyone? Who’s everyone?”

“Johnny,” Yeonjun says shrugging. “And Beomgyu, in the park…and well…Me.”

You nearly choke on air. “You’re kidding? Right?  I didn’t flirt with Johnny nor Beomgyu, Also Beomgyu is like a little brother. That’s gross,” you laugh nervously.

Yeonjun just stares at you and starts to smirk again. “So you don’t deny flirting with me?”  

Your eyes grow big at his observation. Shit. You really exposed yourself like that. “Well…I eh…” you stammer. You just singlehandedly boosted his ego with one sentence. He developed a child-like grin on his face as realisation hit him.

Yeonjun took a step closer to you. “You…what?” he’s getting cocky now.

His face was inching closer and closer to you by the second. He looked at your flustered facial expression as he crouched down a little to get to eye-level with you. When he sees the fear in your eyes he burst out laughing.  

You look at him in shock and he inches away from you again. “I’m just playing with you. You should’ve seen the look on your face.”

“Dick,” you exhale.  

“Dick!?” he repeats all fake defensive, poking your side.

“That’s the only pet name you’re getting if you keep playing with me,” you giggle as he poked your ticklish spot, and you swat his hand away playfully as you continue to walk down the street filled with massive villa’s.

“I prefer da- never mind,” he stops himself immediately.

You nudge him laughing hysterically. Not believing he was about to say that. You take a mental note, hoping you would need it in the future.

Being with Yeonjun was easy, it felt like breathing. He was able to switch your mood in all of 2 seconds and you’re thankful for that. You genuinely thought your night went to shit.  

Before you knew it, the two of you walked around the whole block. You talked about anything and everything and there is so much you had learned about him in such a short time.

He was an only child, he took dance classes since he was little and still practices from time to time, he loves to travel, especially to warm and tropical countries. He’s not a picky eater but can’t handle fishy flavoured foods like oysters. He is passionate and competitive, oh and his favourite dog breed is the Welsh Corgi.  

You were surprised at how easy it was to talk to him since he always seemed so distant and unreachable. But you figured he was just shy because, in reality, he was the biggest sweetheart. Maybe that’s his charm? Girls pine after him because he seems like a bad boy, but when he lets his walls down, he’s the complete opposite.  

“Wait, so…you’re telling me that Soobin got a sports scholarship and you got one because of your grades alone?” Yeonjun asks wide-eyed.

You nod. “Yep, total nerd over here,” you huff. “So…that means you’re like smart, smart?” Yeonjun asks while holding you back before the two of you cross the street to check if there weren’t any cars coming your way.  

The sudden skinship startled you a little as he held you back by your arm before he decided it was ok to cross the road, back to the house. His manners were dumbfounding, and you could tell he wasn’t even trying. It’s just the way he is. Always looking out for others before he looks out for himself.

“I mean…it’s nothing special,” you say lost in thought. you were getting kind of sad as you approached the house, knowing that your quality time would soon be over because of his immense popularity. Once you got inside you knew that everyone would want something from him again.  

“That’s cool y/n, you really earned it,” he gives you a warm smile before the both of you enter the house again. You reciprocate his smile, feeling warm inside at his compliment.

You take off his jacket, handing it back to him but he shakes his head in response. “Keep it with you for the night. Just in case,” he says wrapping it back around your shoulders. “Besides, I don’t think I’m ok with the fact that every dude can just gauge at you in that outfit” he swallows harshly.

You meet his eyes confused at his comment, but he doesn’t budge. “You’re lucky it goes with my outfit,” you giggle. The sound made his heart jump and his lips curl up into a smile. “Even if it didn’t. I’m sure you look good in a potato sack y/n,” he compliments you once again, moving a piece of your hair behind your ear so he could see your pretty features a little better.  

His actions and words were laced with affection. And not once had he tried to make a real move on you yet. You weren’t sure if you were happy or sad that he didn’t. But the more he showed this side of him to you, the more you felt the butterflies in your stomach go crazy.

“Yo Jun!” Another tall guy with long black hair yelled out for Yeonjun’s attention. Making both of you snap out of your bubble as he approached. “We’ve been looking for you man; we need the king of beer pong in our team, alright?”  

Yeonjun chuckled. “Wooyoung, chill. I’ll be right there,” he patted his friend on the back to signal him to leave the two of you, but he didn’t seem to get the hint.

“Oh, who’s this?” He questioned giving you a smirk while holding out his hand for you to shake.

You took his hand, weakly shaking it as you introduce yourself. “I’m y/n,” you smile.

“Well hello y/n, can I just say, you look very pretty,” Wooyoung winked at you and you awkwardly smiled back. Damn these horny and drunk college boys really do be something else.  

“Ok. I think that’s as far as that introduction goes,” Yeonjun says chiming in. “How about that game you were talking about?” he diverts his attention to Wooyoung, but gives you a last look before he walks off.

“You coming?” Yeonjun asks holding out his hand for you. But you just shake your head in response.  

Given the crowd that had formed around the beer pong table, you decided against it. You didn’t like to be the center of attention, but you knew Yeonjun did. When you were with him you could feel so many eyes on you, but he didn’t seem to care or notice.  

“I’ll be fine, just go,” you say shooing him away playfully. He nodded, taking one last glance at you before he disappeared. It didn’t take long before he was completely engulfed in the game. You just stood there, watching him from a distance. He really was the MVP. Everyone was cheering for him as he kept making shot after shot. And of course, you noticed the females around him as well. He’s thriving off the energy and you don’t know why but it made you sad since you were pulled back to face the reality of things.

He’s just out of your league.  

Suddenly your mind flashes back to what Mia told you this afternoon.

“The problem is that a lot of girls have eyes for him too and that can become a problem. The issue is if YOU can handle that.”

Can you handle that? You sigh turning around, wanting to find either of your friends but you couldn’t get far as you bump into a wall of a person.

“Oh, sorry,” you say looking up. It was Johnny.

“Hey,” he smiled at you. “All by yourself out here?” He asked chuckling.

“Well, yes. Every time I blink my friends keep disappearing from my sight because this house is just too huge,” you say looking around you, trying to spot any of them.

Johnny laughed at your comment. “Do you want to see the rest of the house? I can give you a tour if you want? There are three floors. And we even have our own gym,” he said proudly.

“Your own gym? What the hell. Now that, I want to see,” you say intrigued.  

Rich kids really are something else.

Johnny laughed at your sudden enthusiasm and put an arm around your shoulder as he led you upstairs.

Before you reach the top of the stairs, you see Beomgyu, talking to Ryujin, a girl from his class that you were also friendly with.

“Oh hey, y/n, where are you going?” Beomgyu asks, his big eyes darting from you to Johnny. He squinted his eyes at the sight of Johnny having his arm around your shoulder.  

“I’m getting a house tour. Did you know they have a gym?” You say with your mouth agape.

Ryujin chuckled. “Wait till you see the sauna.”  

“Sauna!?” You repeat in awe.  

“Oh yeah, that’s on the third floor. We’ll get there,” Johnny smiles at you innocently and leads you further into the second floor opening the first door on your left. “This is Jaehyun and Jungwoo’s room. It’s kinda messy.”  

Beomgyu watched the two of you like a hawk. He heard you laugh at every joke Johnny threw your way. But the further you went into the hallway, the more your voice became white noise.  

“Ryujin, I’m really sorry but I have to find my hyungs,” Beomgyu says apologetically diverting his attention back to her.

“That’s ok, I was just about to get back to Lia en Yeji anyway,” she smiled at him knowingly. He was going to warn his friends about you disappearing into the rooms with Johnny, and she knew it.  

“Raincheck?” Beomgyu carefully asks, taking Ryujin’s hand. She smiled at him brightly. “Of course.”

He gave her a quick kiss on the cheek and ran down the stairs making his way through the crowd.

Mia, Soobin, Hueningkai and Taehyun were sitting on the same couch from before. “Soobin hyung!” Beomgyu exclaims slightly out of breath.

Soobin looked up from his phone, Mia was situated on his lap, nearly passed out from the jello shots and Kai and Taehyun were lost in conversation with her. “What's up?” he asks putting his phone away.

“Johnny took y/n on the house tour.”  

“….She knows that tour always ends in his room right?” Taehyun chimed in. “She can be so naïve sometimes,” he says clicking his tongue.

Hueningkai’s eyes grew big. “Eh, should we…save her?”

“Save her? For what. She went with Johnny herself, she’s an adult. Why would we interrupt them?” Soobin coldly states, obviously still angry with you. Mia rolled her eyes at her boyfriend, still too drunk to really judge the situation, her head falls back on his shoulder as she giggles.  

Beomgyu raised his eyebrows in disbelief. Soobin would rather die than let a guy take advantage of you, so his sudden attitude towards the situation surprised him.

“Y/n is with Johnny? Upstairs?” Yeonjun overheard the conversation as he approached.  

He was confused, to say the least. He thought the two of you had something going, especially after the walk you took together just minutes ago. He looked down, visibly upset.

“Yeah, I saw them…” Beomgyu says scratching the back of his head.

“I don’t know about you guys, but I feel uncomfortable about it,” Hueningkai says shrugging.

“Me too,” Yeonjun says under his breath, earning a look from Soobin. “Why, did you want to fuck her first?” Soobin says, his voice laced with venom looking straight into Yeonjun’s eyes.

“What?” Yeonjun's eyes grew big as he looked at his friend in confusion. “What the fuck are you talking about?” Yeonjun bites back taking a step towards Soobin.

The younger ones all shifted uncomfortably in their seats. But Beomgyu knew better than to let this escalate.

“Guys, stop,” he said putting himself between Soobin and Yeonjun. “Are we gonna go up there or no? Time is ticking,” Beomgyu asked indifferently.

“I know I sure as hell am,” Yeonjun says tearing his eyes off of Soobin’s burning look, heading for the stairs without thinking twice.

Beomgyu panicked and ran after him, while Taehyun and Hueningkai shifted their attention to Soobin.

“Hyung, what was that about? Why did you come for Yeonjun’s throat like that?” Taehyun asks.

“Y-yeah, everything was fine this afternoon, I don’t get it,” Hueningkai adds.  

Soobin sighed, placing Mia next to him on the couch and off of his lap. “I’ll tell you some other time. Look after Mia for me. I’m going to go after them.”  

The younger ones just nodded at Soobin as he left, sprinting up the stairs two steps at a time.  

Johnny was the biggest clown you had ever met. He pretended as if you were an interested buyer as he was showing you around. Cracking joke after joke. He had opened at least 3 doors to rooms where people were either making out or doing the dirty. And every time he did he looked so flustered it was adorable.

“I’m gonna need them to put a sign on the door or something,” he says scratching the back of his head.  

You laugh at his comment and you realise you finally made it to the infamous gym-room.  

“There better not be any people having sex in here right now or else I’m going to throw up,” Johnny says opening the door carefully. He peaks his head through and sighs in relief. “Ok. It’s safe for us to go in,” he whispers opening the door for you, letting you walk in first. You giggle again at his comedic antics and you step inside. Your eyes skim the place and you swallow harshly.  

“Damn,” you say in awe of what you were seeing. “This room is as big as my whole apartment.”

“And it looks better than the campus gym,” you say letting your hand graze over the fancy equipment.  

“It is, isn’t it,” Johnny says sitting down on one of the benches. “So…” he starts.

You turn around and look at him. There’s a sudden tension that filled the room since you were secluded and the music from the party was barely audible. You were waiting for him to finish that sentence, looking at him expectantly.

“You’re dating Yeonjun?” he asks out of the blue.

You almost choke on air, coughing, widening your eyes at his sudden assumption.

“N-no, why?” you ask. “Does it seem that way?”  

Johnny chuckled at how flustered you got and leaned back, making himself comfortable on the benchpress. “Nah, I just noticed the two of you walking outside together, and when you got back, he wrapped his jacket around you and stuff. It was very cute.  Also, he glared at me when I gave you the drink. I swear Soobin told me you were single,” Johnny says putting his hands up in defeat.

“He glared at you?” You blink a couple of times, letting his observations register and sigh. “It’s complicated,” you say.

“Ahh, it’s one of those huh?” He smiles at you knowingly.  

You just nod. Not really knowing what else to say. “Well, if you ever get bored of him. You know where I live,” he says wiggling his eyebrows and you laugh at his bluntness.  

At that, the door swings open. The sudden bang of the door making impact with the wall made you jump and you knock over one of the dumbbells in the process which caused a loud thud as it made contact with the wooden floor.

The first one you see is Soobin, which made your blood boil. The second is Beomgyu, which made you realise that he’s probably the reason why Soobin is even standing here right now. But then you see Yeonjun’s face, making your eyes nearly pop out of your skull and suddenly, all the anger in your body subsides.

“What the f-” you can’t finish your sentence before Johnny cocks his eyebrow at the three musketeers standing in the doorway of HIS gym room. “Eh, hey guys?” He says a little confused at the way they barged in.  

‘Ah, y/n. W-we were looking for you,” Beomgyu starts.

“Having fun here?” Yeonjun says crossing his arms. He looked upset. And he wasn’t hiding it.  

The temperature in the room dropped below zero due to his tone alone. Shit. He’s mad.

“Oh…guys, guys. Please don’t get the wrong idea here. Y/n was curious about the gym room since I mentioned it. I was just showing her around. Besides she was standing out there all by herself,” Johnny explained lightly.  

Soobin sighed closing his eyes. “Ok so, Johnny. This might sound unbelievable since this is your house and all. But could you maybe like…give us the room…please.”

You just stand there frozen in the same spot as Yeonjun’s eyes are still peering into yours. You were trying to read his facial expression, but you couldn’t. If only you could read minds.  

“You’re right. That does sound unbelievable. But I get it” Johnny chuckles shrugging.

“Just don’t break anything,” he jokes as he got up. You gave him an apologetic look and he just winked at you, signing to you not to worry about it too much.  

You’re lucky that he’s so chill. Otherwise, this could have ended a lot differently.

When the door closed, the loud music from the ongoing party was muted again. Silence engulfed the room which made the atmosphere so much tenser than it was before. For some reason, your heart was pounding uncontrollably fast. You didn’t know whether to be sorry or angry or why they even barged in the way they did.

“Guys,” you start, exhaling. “I’m…lost? What’s going on?” You ask crossing your arms.

Yeonjun leaned against the wall, biting the inside of his cheek nervously. You didn’t do anything wrong, or did you? He expected to see a different image, maybe you on top of Johnny or vice versa. But it wasn’t anything like that. He didn’t understand why he felt so angry. He should’ve just taken you with him to the damn beer pong table, but the fact that you didn’t want to, confused him. Were you just playing him? Did you enjoy having him in the palm of his hands like that just to drop him? All of these thoughts were circling his mind, but he wasn’t man enough to voice them.  He hated how hard you were to read. He hated how you had him in the palm of his hand like that. It was a foreign feeling to him.

What are you doing to him? He swore he was ready to fuck Johnny up if he was touching you in any way. But why? Why did the thought alone bother him so much?

Soobin sighs, awkwardly shifting his weight from his left leg to his right leg, looking at Beomgyu giving him a sign to speak.  

“Eh…I saw you going up with Johnny and I thought he was somehow going to take advantage of you…so I told Soobin hyung and here we are,” he shrugged, fumbling with his fingers trying to avoid your burning stare. “I’m really sorry y/n. I was just worried,” Beomgyu explains.

You close your eyes for a second, letting it sink in. “I…appreciate the concern. But you know and especially Soobin knows, I’m not the type for one night stands. Especially with someone I just met all of two minutes ago….and also…not surrounded by exercise equipment,” you say waving your arm around at the room’s surroundings.  

“We’re sorry for jumping to conclusions,” Yeonjun suddenly said, breaking the silence. “It was wrong of us to interfere. We had no right to do so. It won’t happen again. Even if you were to mess around with Johnny it’s none of my…I mean our business.”  

Before you could say anything, Yeonjun had walked out of the room, leaving you speechless and confused. You wanted to run after him but you decided against that since it didn’t make sense to do so. Nothing made sense to you at the moment.

What would you even be running after?  

A million different questions circle your mind as you’re trying to understand why he looked so incredibly pissed at you.

Did you mess up? Did you blow your only chance to get close to Yeonjun for good? You can’t really comprehend what just happened, but sadness washes over you as you stare at the spot where Yeonjun was standing just seconds ago.  

Soobin’s eyes followed Yeonjun out the door and then his focus shifts to you. He noticed that you were upset and his harsh demeanor softens at the sight. “Beomgyu, can you go check on him?” Soobin asked softly still looking at you with worry emitting from his pupils.

The younger one nodded and walked out the door, confused as ever.

As the door closed behind Beomgyu, you break. You put your hands over your eyes and a small sob escapes your lips.  

You really don’t know why you were crying, but at the same time, you do.

You unintentionally blew the one chance you had with the guy you’ve had a crush one for over a year now and you didn’t know how to fix it. Because honestly, all of your feelings were unspoken, and before today you didn’t even realise you stood an actual chance with him.  

But given the way he reacted to finding you with Johnny, you just knew that he had felt the same way about you too. With an emphasis on the word ‘felt.’

On top of this, the frustration and pent up anger you had towards Soobin made you even more emotional. You hated fighting with him more than anything, especially if he is the one that’s right.

Soobin’s face literally crumbled at the sight. He’d probably seen you cry all of 5 times during your life long friendship, so he panicked.

He walked towards you, bending his knees to get to eye-level with you. He tried to remove your hands from your face but since you didn’t budge – because you were embarrassed – he just pulled you into his arms, patting your hair.  

“Shhh, w-why are you crying…please stop, or I’ll start crying too,” he sighs into your hair, still patting your head to comfort you.

You remove your hands from your face and look up, trying to sniff your tears back into your head.  

“Soobin I-” you look at him not able to finish your sentence as more tears escaped from your eyes.  

He inhaled sharply. “It’s ok, it’s ok. Take your time just please stop crying, you don’t need to explain right away,” he says quickly wiping your tears with the long sleeve of his shirt.  

“No, I do,” you sigh untangling yourself from his embrace. You shake off your bitch ass behaviour and collect yourself, taking deep breaths as you fix your face in the mirrored wall behind you.  

Soobin watched you like a hawk, afraid you would suddenly start crying again.

You sit down on the bench press and rake your hands through your hair.  

“Look, first off I need to apologise to you,” you said calmly.  

Soobin head snapped in your direction as you spoke. He walked over to you and sat down next to you on the way too small bench.  

“You? Apologise?” he nudges you playfully trying to lighten the mood. “That’s new.”  

You chuckle at his statement and sigh. “I don’t know why I was so mad at you. You were just looking out for me and I broke a promise I made to you by going after Yeonjun anyway and I’m sorry.”  

Soobin frowns, blinking a couple of times.

“Y/n. I can’t tell you who to date. I certainly can’t tell you who you should and shouldn’t have feelings for. It was wrong of me to push you into a direction you didn’t want to go in, but-”

“No,” you interrupt him, looking him in his eyes. “I get it. I do. It’s just that…the whole ‘Yeonjun just wants to fuck’ story doesn’t add up? He was so sweet. We have a lot in common, and I could tell he genuinely cared. He didn’t try to get in my pants ONCE, he didn’t even try to kiss me when we were alone together. He was just interested in me, as a person. Not as…some lust object,” you explain to your best ability.

Soobin sighed, letter your words register. “I have to admit; I’ve never seen him so worked up over a girl before.”  

You raise your eyebrows. “What do you mean?”

“I mean that…he was upset y/n. He didn’t like seeing you with Johnny. When Beomgyu told me you went up with Johnny, you should’ve seen him. He overheard and immediately sprinted upstairs. I think he might really like you. Meaning that I was wrong. But you never know with him. It’s like he doesn’t want anyone to get close to him like that,” Soobin says rubbing his forehead. His head was pounding just thinking of the whole situation leading up to this very moment.

“Well, I just blew any chance I had with him,” you say playing with the rings on your fingers.  

“Not necessarily, I mean. It’s not like we caught you in the act or something. Nothing happened. Right?” Soobin asked looking at you.

“No. Nothing. Nothing at all,” you assure him.

Soobin just nods, licking his lips as he’s lost in thought. “Let me fix this,” he says determinedly.

“W-what?” you look up to him in surprise.

“I’ll talk to Yeonjun,” Soobin says reluctantly. “If I didn’t push Johnny into your direction this would have never happened. And also, I can’t see you cry. It hurts my insides,” he says avoiding eye contact.

For the first time in a while, you crack a smile, you nudge him. “Don’t get all soft on me now, you giant baby.”  

He just smiles, looking down at his hands that were situated in his lap. “Just don’t make me regret helping you out with this,” he said sighing.  

You wrap your arms around his waist hugging him, squeezing him to your best ability. “You’re the best, best friend in the whole entire world,” you say squishing your cheek against his. This earned a heartfelt giggle from him and he tries to push you off but you don’t let him.

“Ok, ok, ok. Stop it or else I won’t do it anymore”, he threatens and you let go immediately.

“Now let’s get you drunk. You’ve been through enough,” he chuckles getting up and pulling you up with him.

“Oh my god. Yes, please.”  

You arrive in the kitchen again, ready to get to Mia’s level of brain dead as you watch the jello shot jiggle in your hand.  

“You’re not having anything?” You ask Soobin, but he just shakes his head. “I’m driving, remember?”  

you nod, understanding. “Right, I guess I’ll just cheers you with your Coca Cola,” you snort.  

He smiles at you widely, before you bump your cups together. “To never fighting again,” you say raising your plastic shot glass.

“Agreed,” he says doing the same. And just like that, the shot slid down your throat. You were surprised at the amount of alcohol in it, but then you remembered you were at a frat party.  

Soobin smiled at the face you made as you tasted the jello. He put his cup down on the counter and looked around the room. Soobin’s eyes wandered from you to the hallway and he froze. Not being able to register what he just saw.

You noticed his gaze stopping, and you wave your hand in front of his face. “Soobin, my dude. You good?” You ask him, but he doesn’t respond. His eyes fixed on something behind you.

You frown at him, turning around to follow his gaze, and just as your eyes landed on what Soobin was seeing, your heart sank.

It was Yeonjun, sticking his tongue inside Yeji’s mouth as he pinned her against the wall. Passionately kissing each other like no one was watching.

“Oh, no,” Soobin said under his breath.  

A/N: Sorry. 

ATW’s in mine and the character's perspectives are open.

Chapter 3.

[hopekiedokie]

The Dreaded First Day of School (single dad!jimin)

SUMMARY: On his son’s first day of school, we learn that the badass, leather jacket wearer, and tattoo clad single dad might not be so tough after all. Or maybe, his soft little son isn’t as pure as he ought to be. (In short, Jimin’s baby is growing up and he’s not prepared for it.)

GENRE: fluff, humour, maybe angst if you squint hard enough

WORD COUNT: 1.6k

NOTES: So Jimin isn’t supposed to be a mean or awful dad here. He’s just still not totally equipped to be one even after five years now. This might become a mini series with Ms. Y/n being Haneul’s teacher in the future. Who knows? Also, the photo is not mine.

POSTED ON: 26th March, 2021

What the actual heck is this??

Jimin has seen a lot of crazy things in his life but this, whatever is happening in front of him, is something he truly cannot believe.

You see, today is his son's, Haneul, dreaded™ first day of school.

The kid was up until 3 in the morning, crying his eyes out. He kept begging Jimin to not let him go, saying things like “I’ve been a good boy.” or “I don’t know those people.” or “Please, daddy, I don’t want to go!”

Half of the time, Jimin didn’t even understand what he was saying because he was crying so much.

The worst part is that Jimin had half the mind to give in to all these excuses and to just let Haneul attend school next year.

Contrary to popular belief though, he’s not entirely an awful example of what a father should be. In general, yes, he’s done a lot of questionable things. But in particular, as a father, he does like allowing his son to eat whatever junk food he wants, watch whatever is on the tv, or letting him up way past his bedtime (as late as 4am).

BUT he still has a smidge of decency left in his being and he actually wants his son to grow up decent.

(Which for the most part, is going along fine since Haneul is probably one of the sweetest and softest kids he’s ever seen. How though? Jimin has no idea.)

So with tired eyes and barely 4 hours of sleep, he dragged his son to school.

Even during the drive, Haneul was still adamant about skipping school and all the while, he kept using his cute crying voice that ALWAYS turns Jimin into mush.

Not this time though.

“It’s gonna be okay. You’ll meet a lot of friends and you’ll play with them! It’s gonna be fun, I promise.” This is one of the many things he said to lift his son’s spirits up.

All his efforts are still not enough to pacify Haneul as the tiny boy kept throwing a tantrum. Jimin even had to carry him after getting out of the car and during the entire walk to the school gymnasium where the assembly is, Haneul held his arms tightly around his neck.

To be completely honest, Jimin thought that it would be embarrassing but actually, he found the entire thing quite endearing.

Maybe it’s the narcissistic prick inside him that’s talking but seeing and hearing his son say that he’d rather spend time with him makes him feel like perhaps he’s not so bad of a dad after all.

Which brings us to the present.

To reiterate, Jimin cannot believe what’s happening.

One moment, his son is clinging to him for his dear life, then in an instant, he watched him grow up right in front of him.

In the worst way possible.

Not to be dramatic, but it was like watching his entire life slip away from his grasp.

The beginning of the end started when Jimin pointed to these three boys and insisted Haneul to introduce himself.

Boy, oh boy, oh boy, BIG mistake on his behalf!

He probably should’ve pushed his son to the “nerdier” looking kids. That would’ve helped him in the long run, as well!

At first, he watched in awe from a far as Haneul progressively turned less tense and more comfortable with those boys. They started with cute small smiles but it quickly turned into wildly animated gestures while comparing their Paw Patrol themed trolley backpacks.

“That’s my boy! Already making friends and it’s only been 5 minutes.” Jimin proudly thought to himself.

Okay, maybe Haneul is going to be fine. All that crying thinking Jimin did the entire night was for nothing! His cute soft son can totally do this.

Now, Jimin’s life altering moment comes. The time to actually say goodbye is here.

A teacher announces that they’re taking the kids to their respective classrooms and even if they cry or make a huge fit about it, the parents or guardians should stay where they are. They should refrain from “babying” their child.

Alright, now’s the time for Haneul to cry again! There’s no way he doesn’t cry even just a tiny bit…....Right?

Jimin makes eye contact with Haneul and, without any second thoughts, proudly mouths “I love you” while pointing to him.

Normally, Haneul is quick to return the gesture. Heck, he even goes as far as drawing a huge heart with his tiny pointer fingers!

But today, he doesn’t do that. No no no no no!

Instead, Haneul discreetly looks around him to check if anyone is watching him then……….

He shakes his head towards his father then faces back to his new friends.

Gasp! What is this???

Jimin has never felt so betrayed in his entire life! Not to mention, by his OWN son too.

This irks him so much.

So much so that he stands and gets close to his son, opposing the teacher’s instruction of letting their kids be.

Bitch, no. He’s getting his “I love you” from his son no matter what.

As he walks towards Haneul, it’s apparent that the kid had somehow done a complete 180 from his mood 10 minutes ago.

How can this be? How is he suddenly so cold towards his own man?

When he finally gets to Haneul, he literally, no joke, had to call his name 4 times to get his attention. The actual audacity of this kid!

“Hey, Haneul. Daddy’s gotta go!” Jimin says with his world famous “no eyes” smile.

Haneul’s face drops.

Bingo!

This kid is about to get a huge reality check or so Jimin thinks he is.

He’s waiting for any signs of despair, a sniff or maybe some glassy eyes but nothing happens.

Come on, where are the water works?? Where are all the hugs and kisses???

Haneul is like (・-・) to Jimin.

O-okay…….

“...”

“...”

“...”

Nothing???

“There’s a lot of scary strangers here……”

Okay, so that was really mean for Jimin to say bUT HE ONLY WANTS TO SQUEEZE EVEN JUST A DROP OF AFFECTION FROM HIM. Sue him!

Haneul finally opens his mouth.

Jimin quietly anticipates his son to return to his warm and loving self that he still doesn’t quite know where he gets from...

“So what, daddy? I’m a big boy! I don’t need you.”

(´⊙ω⊙`)?！

Uhm exCusE mE, but W H A T??

Needless to say, that statement hurt Jimin like a buttcheek on a stick.

However, he’s not gonna break away from his badass persona in front of all these people, especially around these little shits that they call “children”. He has an ✨𝓪𝓮𝓼𝓽𝓱𝓮𝓽𝓲𝓬✨ that he strictly abides to, people!

And frankly, he’s not gonna let his son walk all over him.

So without any word, Jimin leans down to give Haneul a kiss. If he’s not gonna receive any affection through words then fine! He’s gonna get it through a different way.

Jimin’s lips are almost in contact with Haneul’s plush cheeks. They are literally a hair away that Jimin can feel the heat emitting from it but all at once, that heat is gone.

You know why?

Because Haneul is quick to do that matrix shit where he bends his back to avoid his father’s lips.

Then he saunters away, leaving Jimin hanging.

(๑´⊙ ₃ ⊙`๑)

Jimin calls him a couple times but again, he did not look back.

S I G H

Alright, then. He doesn’t normally raise his voice towards his son (nor disciplines him tbh) but oh boy, oh boy! This kid is practically asking for it.

He doesn’t give a fuck if he’s five, no son of his is gonna be allowed to treat him like that!

“HANEUL! GET BACK HERE. NOW!”

Well, that got him looking back towards his father.

Jimin points in front of him to which Haneul begrudgingly complies after taking a peek from his new found friends.

Haneul hears the other boys snicker behind him as he trudges towards his slightly pissed father.

When he’s standing right where his father wants him, Jimin leans his cheek down again for him to kiss.

Now, the other boys are blatantly laughing at him.

Maaaaaaaan. He can’t be a laughing stock on his first day of school! He needs to be as cool as his daddy!

As Haneul contemplates his life choices, Jimin patiently waits for his kiss. There’s no way Haneul is gonna reject him for the third time in a row within a span of two minutes!

Within a few seconds, he feels Haneul’s lidol babie hand against his cheek.

O M G

How 😭 cute 😭 is 😭 this 😭 ??

This has got to be one the softest moments they have shared together. AND it’s in front of all these people!

Take that Namjoon hyung for saying I can’t be a gentle and tender loving father!

Jimin is about to place a hand over Haneul’s small one to caress it but then Haneul pushes his face away.

“Just go, daddy!”

Before Jimin is able to process what just transpired, Haneul is already strutting towards the other kids, feeling like a king or a boss for bitch-slapping his own father.

This little fUqer!!!

Who does he think he is to act like this towards Jimin iN FRONT OF OTHER PEOPLE??

This is what happens when he lets his son spend too much alone time with his Uncle Jungkook and Uncle Taehyung.

But to be fair, Haneul is still Jimin’s son at the end of the day so…..like, maybe he shouldn’t be too surprised??

Yet, still, he truly cannot believe it.

All it took was 5 minutes and a rowdy set of friends, then his kid has grown up.

He apparently “doesn’t need him” anymore, according to the kid.

To think that Jimin got up early to make him those cute bento boxes. He even specifically made them look like various pokemons that Haneul fancies!

Wow. Just. WOW.

Excuse him, but he’s just gonna get in his car and crank up “Slipping Through My Fingers” by ABBA while he ugly sobs.

[mooresomore]

Detective AU

Here is my detective AU I had been teasing earlier. I was actually able to write a tiny bit of angst- which quickly turned back into fluff (what can I say, lol). This all started with my rewatch of season 2, when Eddie had to go to Christopher’s school in the suit. Add that in with the 4.3 “true crime podcast” comments and that was it. I still wanted Buck to be a firefighter, even though Eddie was a detective. Some of the cracks about police officers and firefighters in here are actual things I’ve heard between our local cops/firefighters. My brain immediately *short-circuited* and this idea wouldn’t let go. Hopefully you all like it!

Buck had been introduced to Patrolman Eddie Diaz by his captain Bobby Nash’s wife, Athena Grant-Nash. They had hit it off (even being able to laugh at everyone’s jokes about them being the current Montagues and Capulets), and they had been together for 4 years now. Eddie had been working his way up the ranks, and now he was set to take the detective’s test.

“You got this babe,” Buck said, coming over to sit by Eddie as Eddie was having a freak out about not being good enough the night before his test. “You are going to go there and knock it out of the park. I believe in you.”

“Thank you.” Eddie said, stealing a kiss. “I wish you could be there.”

“I wish I could too,” Buck agreed. “But Bobby told me that I can take your call, no matter what is going on, unless we’re on a call. Plus, Christopher and I gotta have our guy’s night.” Buck teased, knowing that Eddie would relax knowing that Christopher was in good hands. Buck leaned in again. “You got this Eddie Diaz.”

“Thank you.” Eddie said. “I needed to hear that. Bed?”

“Yes.” Buck said. “I was thinking we could get up early and make breakfast for Christopher- and you- and Christopher and I could walk you out to the car.”

“I’d like that a lot.” Eddie said. “Love you.”

“Love you too.”

*

In the morning, Eddie helped Buck in the kitchen, and after breakfast, Buck and Christopher walked Eddie out to the car. Christopher gave Eddie a drawing for good luck, and Buck gave Eddie a kiss on the cheek and told Eddie to call Buck as soon as the test was over. With that, Eddie was gone, and Buck took Christopher to school. 

“Remember Superman, Carla is going to pick you up after school today. I’ll get you after shift, and we’ll have a boy’s night. Your dad will be home tomorrow.”

“Ok. Bye Buck. Love you.”

“Love you too kid.”

*

“Buck, stop pacing.” Bobby said. “He’s going to do just fine.”

“I know he is, but it just sucks waiting, you know?”

“I do,” Bobby said. “But Athena tells me he’s one of the best she’s ever seen. Just trust your boy ok?”

Buck was about to say something when his phone rang. “It’s Eddie!” Buck quickly picked up the phone. “Hey. Yeah, not on a call. Oh, nothing. Bobby kicked me out of the kitchen. Seems I was too aggressive with chopping the vegetables.” There was a pause and everyone held their breath (of course they were eavesdropping). Buck’s face broke out into a huge grin. “That’s great. I’m so proud of you. Told you you’d be able to do it. Mind if I tell everyone else on shift. Yeah, they’re listening.” Buck chuckled. I will. Christopher and I will FaceTime you tonight and you can tell him. Ok. Talk to you later. Love you.”

Buck hung up the phone and turned around to face everyone. “Eddie passed the detective’s test. He said thank you in advance.” Everyone chuckled.

“Let me know the date of the pinning,” Bobby told Buck. “You’ll have it off, no questions asked.”

“Thank you.”

*

Buck gave Carla a thumbs up when he got home from shift, letting her know that Eddie had passed. “We’re going to call Eddie in a few and Eddie wants to tell Christopher himself.”

“I am so proud of that man.” Carla said.

“Me too.” Buck smiled.

“You tell me what to bring to the party.” Carla said as she left.

“Yes ma’am.”

*

Eddie called Christopher and Buck right before Christopher’s bedtime routine was supposed to start.

“Dad!” Christopher smiled.

“Hey buddy. Are you and Buck having fun?”

“Yeah. He let me have ice cream for dessert and we watched “Finding Nemo”. It’s bedtime now.”

“Wow. Sounds like fun. I know it is-that’s why I called. I wanted to tell you goodnight and that I’d see you tomorrow.”

“Ok.” Christopher paused. “Did you do good on your test?”

“I did.” Eddie smiled. “I did really good on it. So I get a new job title.”

“Cool. Good job.” Christopher smiled. “Love you dad.”

“Love you too buddy. Go get ready for bed and be good for Buck, ok? I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Ok.”

“I’ll get him in bed and call you back?” Buck asked. Looking at Eddie, he added, “Actually, I’ll just talk with you in the morning. You look exhausted. Get some rest.”

“Thanks.” Eddie smiled. “Thanks again for watching Chris tonight.”

“Anytime. Go to bed.” Buck said. As Eddie shifted the camera around, Buck caught sight of the shirt Eddie was wearing. “You stole my shirt?” Buck chuckled.

“I wanted a piece of home with me and hoped it would bring me good luck.” Eddie said. “It obviously worked.”

“You did it all on your own detective.” Buck said, watching Eddie smile sleepily. “Seriously, get some rest. We’ll see you tomorrow.” Christopher hollered down the hall. “His majesty awaits.” Buck chuckled.

Eddie chuckled. “Goodnight. I love you.”

“Love you too.” Buck said.

*

After Buck dropped Christopher off at school, he came home to find Carla and the rest of the 118 at the house, ready to help him get everything ready for the surprise party. Buck left and went to intercept Eddie before he could see the surprise while the rest of them put the finishing touches on things and got Abuela and Pepa there.

They went out to breakfast as a reward. Buck then convinced Eddie to pull Christopher out of school for half a day and go home and have a “family day”. If Eddie suspected something, he didn’t say anything.

Buck made sure to have Eddie open the door. Buck caught Christopher’s eye and grinned while holding a finger against his lips. 

“Surprise!” Everyone yelled when Eddie opened the door; he looked Buck to Buck and Christopher, who were smiling.

“Thank you.” Eddie said. They had a small party, and as the three of them were sitting on the couch after everyone had left, Eddie looked at Buck. “You didn’t have to do that.”

“Yes we did,” Buck said. “Because you’re special to us and you deserve to be celebrated. Christopher was the one who suggested it.”

“Thanks bud.”

Christopher burrowed into Eddie for a tight hug, and then he was asking for Eddie to put him to bed.

“Sure thing buddy. Say goodnight to Buck.”

“Night Buck.”

“Night Superman.”

“Stay here for a minute?” Eddie asked. “I want to talk to you about something.”

“Ok.”

*

When Eddie came back downstairs a few minutes later, Buck was flipping through channels on the TV. Eddie sat down, and Buck’s hand found its way to the back of Eddie’s neck, where it started running light circles. “What’s going on babe?”

“Um,” Eddie said. “I was thinking. We’ve been together now for four years, and I’d love to be together forever. I was wondering if you’d like to get married.”

The hand stopped moving and Buck looked like a deer in the headlights. “Oh.”

“If you don’t want to…” Eddie said, misunderstanding Buck’s shock as a no.

“No, no.” Buck quickly reassured Eddie. “I’m just a little surprised is all. I wasn’t expecting this tonight, but I would love to marry you.” Buck paused. “Can we elope and have a courthouse wedding? I don’t want anything fancy.”

“Yeah.” Eddie said. “That’s what I was thinking too. We can do a reception for everyone later.”

“Name the time and place and I’m there.” Buck said.

“How about next Monday at 3? You don’t have a shift that day- I already checked with Bobby.” Eddie said. “I was thinking we could pick up Christopher from school and then take him with us.”

“That would be great.” Buck said, leaning in to kiss Eddie. “I love you. I want to do so much more than just kiss you right now.”

“Me too,” Eddie admitted, knowing that they couldn’t with Christopher down the hall. Christopher had been waking up with nightmares recently and crawling into Eddie and Buck’s bed. It wasn’t happening too often, but it was enough that Eddie had scheduled an appointment with Christopher’s doctor.

“This weekend? We can see if Abuela will take him?” Buck suggested. 

“I’ll talk with her in the morning.” Eddie agreed. “She was asking about when he was going to come over again.” Eddie smiled. “Come on, let’s go to bed. It’s been a long day, and you have to go to work tomorrow.”

“So do you, Detective Diaz.” Buck smiled.

“You’re never going to quit calling me that now, are you?” Eddie asked.

“Nope!” Buck grinned, popping the “p”.

“Come on,” Eddie said. He had a smile on his face too though.

*

In the morning, Eddie woke up to the smell of bacon. He felt the sheets, and sure enough, they were cold. Buck had been up for a while. Eddie didn’t mind, his boyfriend- no wait, now his fiance- was a great cook. Eddie had truly gotten spoiled to the home-cooked meals he got. It was definitely a change from all the pre-bought meals he’d heat up for him and Christopher, or the fast food burgers he lived on during shift.

Eddie padded down the stairs, finding his coffee mug on the counter with it made just the way he liked. Christopher and Buck were standing in front of the stove, flipping something in a pan. Buck looked up as Eddie hit the creaky floorboard at the edge of the kitchen counter. “Good morning.”

“Morning.” Eddie said. “Morning superman.”

“Morning daddy!” Christopher grinned, and that’s when Eddie saw the smudge of flour on Christopher’s cheek. 

Eddie couldn’t help the smile that came to his face. “You helping Buck make breakfast?”

“Yeah. I’m his sous chef. Wait, I said that right, right?” Christopher asked, looking at Buck.

“You did.” Buck smiled, wiping the flour off Christopher’s cheek. “He’s been a great help in here.” Buck added.

“Awesome. What do we have today?” Eddie asked, even though he could clearly see they were pancakes.

“Pancakes. Made from scratch.” Christopher said.

“Take off your apron bud and go sit at the table. I’ll bring them over. The plate is kinda hot.” Buck said.

“Ok.” Christopher grabbed the orange juice on his way by and the plate of bacon. He sat them down on the table and took his spot beside Eddie.

They ate breakfast in a comfortable silence. Then it was upstairs for Christopher to get ready for school, and for them to get ready for their shifts.

“I’m working a 24 hour shift.” Buck said. “There’s a pan of lasagna in the fridge for you to heat up for dinner. I’ll try to call around bedtime so I can tell you guys goodnight.”

“Ok. If all goes well, I should be home by 5. Carla is picking him up, right?”

“Yep.”

“Ok. Have a great day. I love you.”

“I love you too.”

*

As luck would have it, they met up on a call halfway through their shifts. The 118 had got a call about a stabbing, and when they pulled up on scene, the police were already there. The victim was already dead, and they just needed confirmation. Hen and Chim went in to do their duty, while Bobby talked with Athena for a minute. Buck was scanning the various officers, knowing that Eddie more than likely would have been there-this would be one of his first chances to work a homicide case. Buck didn’t see him though and was about to ask Athena and Bobby if they had when there was a pair of hands over his eyes and a “guess who?”

Buck couldn’t help the laugh that escaped. “I hope that’s you Eddie.”

“It is.” Eddie confirmed. “Fancy meeting you here.”

“Well,” Buck teased, “We come help you guys out all the time. You know the saying- ‘God created firefighters so police officers could have heroes’. Just doing my job.”

Eddie laughed. “Right. I seem to remember the saying going the other way. Either way, it was good to see you. I better head in there. This is my first case that I get to assist on.”

“You’ll nail it.” Buck said. “Good luck. I’ll call you guys tonight. Love ya. Be safe.”

“You too. Love you.” Eddie said, watching as Buck climbed back into the fire truck and sped off to his next call. Eddie took a breath and headed into the crime scene.

*

“So? How’s the case going detective?” Buck asked when he called later that night to tell Eddie and Christopher goodnight.

“You know I can’t tell you.” Eddie smiled. “But I’m learning a lot and they say I’m doing a good job.”

“I bet you are.” Buck said, grinning as Christopher came into view. “Hey Buddy.”

“Hi Buck.” Christopher came and sat on Eddie’s lap. He then launched into a story about what they’d learned at school today. Buck listened intently and asked a lot of questions.

“Sounds great buddy. If it’s ok with your dad, we’ll go to the zoo next weekend.”

“Please?” Christopher looked at Eddie, who said, “Yes.”

“I’ll see you tomorrow after school ok buddy?” Buck said. “You take good care of your dad and get some sleep.”

“Yes Buck.” Christopher nodded, blowing a kiss to Buck, who caught it and sent one of his own. Christopher giggled and hopped off Eddie’s lap. “Night Buck. I’ll call you when I’m ready dad.”

“Night Christopher,” Buck said as Eddie said, “Ok.”

Eddie looked at Buck. “Be safe out there tonight ok?”

“Always am.” Buck said. The alarm bell went off. “Duty calls. See you in the morning. Love you.”

“Love you too.”

*

Buck wandered into the house the next morning as Eddie and Christopher were walking out the door. “Have a good day guys.” Buck said, kissing Christopher’s head and straightening Eddie’s tie. “See you tonight.”

“Night Buck.”

*

Buck went into the bedroom to grab his clothes prior to getting into the shower and found the note Eddie left him on the bedside table.

Buck,

I hope you get some rest. I can’t believe in 4 days I get to marry you and spend forever with you. Even if you are a hose monkey ;) I’ll see you tonight. Love you.

Eddie

Buck grinned. He grabbed the clothes out of the drawer, set the T-shirt on the bedside table and went into the shower. Afterwards, he set an alarm and climbed into bed and crawled in on Eddie’s side, letting Eddie’s smell lull him to sleep.

*

When the alarm blared, Buck sat up and shut it off. He slipped on the shirt and went downstairs to the kitchen.

*

Buck was just sliding the meatloaf into the oven when Carla came home with Christopher. “Buckaroo. How have you been?” Carla asked.

“Good. Work’s been keeping me busy.” Buck said, watching Christopher make his way over to the table without being asked. “I’m sorry I haven’t seen you much lately.”

“I’ve been busy with Christopher mostly,” she said, “and you and Eddie have gotten a pretty good routine down.” Carla pauses. “I think though, with him becoming a detective, that things will probably change.”

“Yeah.” Buck said. “You’re still…”

“Oh, I’m always going to be here for you three sugar.” Carla gave him a hug. “You boys are my family.”

“You’re ours too.” Buck said.

“Tell Eddie I said hi. I’ll see you guys next week.”

“Bye Carla.”

Christopher quickly finished his homework and set the table. Buck and Christopher played a round of Mario Kart while they waited for Eddie to get home.

*

The first thing Eddie noticed when he got home was the smell of meatloaf coming from the kitchen and Christopher’s laugh. Eddie made his way in. “Hey, I’m...” He said, pausing abruptly when he noticed it was his LAPD shirt Buck was wearing. “Home.” He finished.

“Ah, you’re just in time.” Buck said. “I was just putting dinner on the table.”

They ate dinner, and then decided that they could have a movie night since Christopher didn’t have school tomorrow.

“You’re wearing my shirt.” Eddie said.

“Yeah.” Buck said. “Needed a piece of you with me today.”

“Not that I don’t love seeing you wear my clothes, but let me get it in a bigger size so you don’t pop out of it.” Eddie said, smiling.

“Fine. But only if you wear it first so it smells like you.”

“I can do that.”

*

The wedding day was here- Carla was going to be one of the witnesses along with Maddie. Christopher had been over the moon since finding out Buck was going to stay forever.

The ceremony was short and sweet, and Abuela took Christopher so Eddie and Buck could “properly celebrate your marriage”. (And properly celebrate they did; they had matching hickies on their collarbones that their uniforms would thankfully cover.)

They settled into a pattern; nothing had really changed-other than Buck was in the process of adopting Christopher (Christopher’s request). They still ran odd shifts and saw each other on calls, but it was just like it had been. Just now they had rings and the “husband” title.

*

**6 Months Later**

Buck had just gotten home from a split shift and was trying to crawl into bed without waking up Eddie. Somehow he managed to be successful, and Buck closed his eyes. They’d be up soon enough to take Christopher to school (and Eddie would have to go to work).

It barely felt like he had closed his eyes when Eddie’s cell phone startled Buck awake. Eddie answered “Diaz. Uh huh. I’ll be there in 20.”

“Homicide?” Buck guessed, looking at the clock.

“Yeah, go back to bed.” Eddie said, getting up to get dressed.

“I’ll get Christopher to school and pick him up.” Buck said. “You call us when you’re coming home and we’ll have dinner ready.”

Eddie tied his tie and slid his suit jacket on. “Deal. I love you.” He said, coming over to give Buck a kiss.

“Love you too Detective Diaz. Be safe.”

“Always am.”

*

Buck got Christopher off to school and was working on cleaning the house when his phone rang. “Oh hey Athena. What’s up?”

“Buck? Are you sitting down?” Athena asked. “If not, you might want to.”

“Athena? What’s going on?!” But was immediately on high alert. “Is Eddie ok?”

“He will be.” Her voice was calm and soft. “There was an accident at the crime scene. He’s at the hospital and fine, but he won’t be home tonight. They want to keep him for observation.”

“Which hospital?” Buck asked, grabbing his keys. “I’ll call Carla to get Christopher after school. I don’t want to worry him.”

“He’s at General.” Athena said. “He’s ok, Buckaroo. I’ll make sure you have clearance to enter.”

“Thanks Athena.”

Buck made his way to General, where Eddie was on the observation floor. “Detective Diaz,” Buck said, leaning against the doorframe. ���What happened?”

“Hey Buck.” Eddie said. “I’m ok.”

“Are you sure?” Buck asked, going to sit by Eddie.

“I am. I wasn’t planning on there being a victim in the closet still alive, and she attacked me with a knife. They’re mostly superficial, but she got a good one in to my shoulder and they want me to stay overnight. I’m sorry.”

“Nothing to be sorry for. Other than having Athena call me and scare the crap out of me.” Buck chuckled. 

“Sorry. I told her to let you know I was ok.”

“I got Carla to pick up Christopher after school. I wasn’t sure if you wanted him to be here or not.”

“He can come by.” Eddie said. “Instead of me calling you tonight.”

“Ok. I’ll have Carla bring him. I’ll be right back.”

Christopher came and visited for a while, and then it was time for Buck and Christopher to go. “I’ll see you guys tomorrow,” Eddie said.

“Night dad.” Christopher said. Buck echoed, “Night dad. We love you,” and kissed Eddie’s forehead.

*

Eddie was home the next day and after a stern lecture from both Buck and Athena, he was allowed to go back to work.

*

“Diaz.” Eddie said when the phone rang early in the morning. “Give me 30 and I’ll be there.”

Buck was up and out of bed making Eddie coffee while Eddie got dressed. By the time Eddie came downstairs in his suit and tie, Buck had the coffee in Eddie’s “#1 dad” to-go mug Christopher had made. Buck straightened Eddie’s tie and smoothed out Eddie’s jacket. “Go get em Detective Diaz.” Buck said, leaning down for a kiss. “Be safe.”

“I will be.” Eddie said. “I’ll call you when I’m headed home. Have a good shift Firefighter Buckley.”

“I will. I love you.”

“Love you too.”

[baeklination]

Ocean: the deep (2)

Pic: comma.

Date: 210114

Warnings/Contains: angst, abuse (ment./emot.), gen.explicit language

Pairing: au! Baekhyun x F. Reader

WC: 7,9k

NOTE: It’s not all angst, but describing it as fluff feels off. On sensitive/explicit topics.

Prologue  Masterlist

                                    ¤¤

Alot of us tell ourselves “I’d know”, but chances are you wouldn’t. Not if they didn’t want you to. And if they did, showed you a sliver of the truth, would you be brave enough to see it instead of thinking up an excuse? 

                                     ¤¤

“Are you okay?”, Beanie asks, putting the break on her stroller so you can sit down on the park bench.

“Me? Yeah, I’m fine. A little tired. Still getting used to drinking wine instead of mixed drinks I guess.”

“No, not you. I mean you guys, you and Baekhyun.”

“What do you mean? You saw him last night.” Doubt finding its way to your mind - she has after all known him for longer than you. “Did...Did he say something to you?”

“No, but I noticed…”, she turns to you, stalling. “Don’t get mad, alright?”

“Why would I get mad?”

“Just… I’m gonna say something and I don’t want you to get mad at me.”

“Okay, I won’t get mad, Bean. What?”

“I’ve been married to Minnie for a while now, so I see Baekhyun alot, and I’ve heard some things - rumours I guess - that maybe, you know…”

“Don’t say it, Bean. Please don’t say it.” Heart sinking, you brace yourself and ask her.

“That he sleeps around..?”

“No, not that. More that he’s maybe...not so...kind.” 

“What..?”, you burst out.

“Like I said, it’s rumours, I never really hung out with his girlfriends before, so I wouldn’t know. But I…”

Beanie’s fidgeting makes your throat tighten.

“I feel like Baekhyun used to dote on you, but lately he’s been acting more like...your dad.”

“That’s ridiculous..!”, you say, swatting your hand in the air. “Besides, don’t dads dote on their kids, hm?” 

“But you’re not his daughter”, she says bluntly, fixing her eyes on you.

“Are you talking about something specific that happened last night?”

                                          ¤¤

  Hearing the lock turn you breathe a sigh of relief; having a dinner party at home without the owner of said home wasn’t your plan. Baekhyun stops in the living room to greet his guests and engage in the usual banter - as if he didn’t see half of them earlier in the day - before you hear his footsteps nearing the kitchen. 

“Sorry I’m late, sweetie. I just couldn’t seem to get out..!”, he huffs.

Putting on your best Suzy Homemaker air (jokingly, of course), you turn around with your arms open.

“You’re just in time, Baekhyun. Honestly, I just took the lasagna out of the oven.”

“Wow, this looks great…”, Baekhyun says, taking the sight of your carefully planned dishes in before kissing you. “But…Are you wearing that?”, he says leaning back, his eyes slightly narrowing.

“Hm? You picked this dress. Don’t you remember?”, you say puzzled.

“Of course I remember. But it’s...more for me, isn’t it? Just me. Maybe put on something more modest?”

“Modest..?”, you laugh. “This isn’t worse than any of the other girls...” 

“Well, you don’t have to be like them, do you? You’re my girl, aren’t you?”, he coos.

You know he’s being overly sensitive, but it won’t cost your ego much to change - not as much as this dinner ruined would, so you lift your hands up in defeat.

“Okay, you win”, you sigh.

His smile lights up not only his face, but your entire being. His hands on your cheeks is a promise of sweet touches to be given later on; his lips one of your name being whispered in love.

“I’ll set the table, sweetie.”

¤

“You changed your dress?”, Beanie asks.

“Serves me right for not wearing an apron”, you chuckle as you sit down.

Baekhyun takes your hand and smiles. 

“Please, everyone”, you gesture to the fully laden table “enjoy.”

                                        ¤¤

“No, I mean in general.”

“Well, in general, you’ve nothing to worry about. Sure, I don’t get flowers delivered every other day like before, but that’s because I practically live with him now. You know how it is”, you say, gesturing to her stroller. “The beginning is always a fairytale, and then it becomes something else. You don’t need all the trimmings when you realise you…”

“Love each other?”, Beanie says, leaning forward with big eyes.

“Yeah…”, you say, shrugging your shoulders.

“Baekhyun said the L word to you..!”

“A month ago. And every day since. God, why am I embarrassed to say it!? Stop laughing, Bean!”

“I’m sorry. This is great!”, Beanie replies, clapping her hands. “Now I feel bad for dragging him like that...”

“I won’t tell on you.” You sit quiet for a moment, then continue. “And when you say “dad”, if you mean how he sometimes suggests things for me to do, or wear, I dunno, it’s because I’ve asked him to. You know I’m not from around here, so sometimes when we go places, say for dinner, I want to know what cutlery to use, or what those goddamn french words mean, you know. It’s embarrassing - for me - to be so obviously misplaced…”

“Shit, don’t I know it…”, Beanie shakes her head. “What? You know I grew up on the other side. First time Minnie took me to a corporate event...he called it “a party”, so you know I rolled up in my shortest sequin number and my highest glitter heels… Shit, the looks I got!”, she wheezes.

“Those stiffs must’ve thought you were the entertainment!”

“Hey! But you’re right. I tell you, Minnie didn’t get any for a week.”

After wiping her tears Beanie gets serious again:

“I’m sorry, alright? Only looking out for you. But who knows...soon I might be looking for a maid of honour attire”, she smirks.

You cross your fingers and smile back.

                                         ¤¤

“I’ll be a happy man the day I don’t have to read the name Seung Inc. again”, Baekhyun sighs and slumps down on the couch, lifting your head to rest on his thigh.

“Settlement getting the better of you?”

“Their stupidity might”, he chuckles, giving you a kiss. “I’ll take Ga’ round the block before bed.”

“No, I can do it.”

“I could use some fresh air. And your overdramatic drama starts soon, doesn’t it?”

“It’s a perfectly lifelike show, Baekhyun. What, you mean your boss doesn’t slap you cross the face?”, you giggle, remembering his disbelief at the scene.

“No, but I might slap him one of these days. Come on Ga’”, he says, getting up and patting his thigh. “Gawa, come here.”

Gawa doesn’t move, so you nudge him off of the couch:

“Go!”

“Why do I always have to call that dog three times?”, Baekhyun shakes his head.

“What that dog thinks is anyone’s guess. He probably likes the way you say his name. Don’t forget-”

“Bags. I know.”

  Feeling a little antsy you busy yourself with a bit of tidying up in the kitchen, emptying the dishwasher, wiping the counters and the like. There’s really no need, as you’ve already done it, but it’s something to do while waiting for Baekhyun to come back, for him to go to bed. “Take it easy. It’s just a search, what’s gonna happen? Nothing. It’s not true, so nothing.” 

When he’s finally tucked in you bring in his water bottle - which he always forgets - and put it on the nightstand. 

“Thanks.”

“All set?”

“Beyond all set…”

“Mm, I can see you won’t need a bedtime story to fall asleep”, you say, running your fingers through his hair.

“Depends…”, he says, seemingly half asleep. “Depends on the story”, he smiles, guiding your hand downwards.

You pull it away. When he doesn’t even bother opening his eyes you know he wasn’t serious anyway, so you turn off the light and say goodnight, closing the door behind you.

                                     ¤¤ 

  Finishing your show you mute the TV and sit still for a while, making sure you can’t hear any sound except Gawa’s snoozing. “Let’s just do this.” You grab your computer and start reading. You’re relieved to find you can’t relate to most of the things you read, but once in a while the text makes you stop;

Patronizing; one month: 

Going through your phone Baekhyun had laughed when you suggested he wouldn’t like finding you going through his. “Go ahead. But I doubt you’d be able to discern anything.”

“What, ‘cus I’m not a corporate lawyer suddenly I’m dumb..?”

“No...But put it this way. Since I am a lawyer I know certain things. But you know things I don’t, sweetie. Like scanning barcodes, or working a cash register. That’s more your thing”, he had smiled. 

You had definitely felt some kind of way about the conversation. But seeing as he’d already said he wasn’t calling you dumb you didn’t find the words to approach it without it seeming like you were picking a fight.

“Joking”: Two months:

 “Baekhyun, I don’t think this is my size. Why’d you cut the label off?”

“It was huge. I knew you’d do it anyway. Maybe you’ve gained weight…”,  he said, chuckling at how the fabric cut into your waist.

You knew you hadn’t, and comparing it to your other trousers, the one he bought was definitely smaller.

Monitoring your whereabouts: three months:

Stacking condiments on the shelf at work you’d seen him coming down the aisle; a lovely surprise in the middle of a long shift. “Hi..! What are you doing here?”

“You weren’t answering your phone, just wanted to see you’re okay.”

“I don’t have it on me, you know that.”

“Okay, you got me. I was gonna pretend I wanted snacks, but really I missed you.”

You had found it adorable that he’d gotten into the car just to see you. But had he maybe done it to see if your text was true - if you were really covering a shift for a sick coworker? 

“Sweetie…”

Drunk with sleep you rub your eyes. Baekhyun is kneeling next to the couch, the white light from your laptop making him an angelic figure in the otherwise dark room.

“Oh”, you scrunch your face. “I must’ve fallen asleep…”

“You must have”, he says, brushing your hair behind your ear. “Who’s being abused?”

You jerk, suddenly fully awake, and look at your screen: “Signs to look out for”. You scramble to sit up and close the web browser.

“No, Beanie just-”

“Minnie’s abusing Beanie?”

“No. Someone in her mom circle...she thought maybe. I don’t know…” You know it’s impossible Baekhyun doesn’t hear the lie, but he doesn’t let on. “I just thought I’d see if there’s anything she could look...out for, you know. She’s busy with the baby and all...”, you shrug your shoulders, trying to brush it off as nothing special.

“If she’s that busy maybe she shouldn’t put her nose in other people’s business”, he says, cocking his head.

There’s an almost undetectable smile on his lips which sends a shiver through your body.

“It’s not like that, she-”

“Come to bed”, he says getting up on his feet.

“I... Come on, Gawa.”

“No, he stays. I don’t want him in the room.”

  There’s something distinctly different in how his shoulders look as he walks away. Something that makes you drag out your visit to the bathroom, hoping he’ll be asleep by the time you’re done. Tiptoeing into your room you breathe a sigh of relief, until you get into bed and he immediately rolls over to hug you. Any other day this would’ve been nothing less than what you expected - and wanted - but now all you can think of is how fast your heart is beating, and whether he can feel it or not. And Beanie…“What if he asks her? I can’t tell her to lie for me, then I’d have to explain why I did it in the first place…” But your thoughts are interrupted when Baekhyun exhales loudly into your neck and pulls your body closer, easing you out of your underwear.

                                         ¤¤

  Cutting the alarm at 08.15 you sit up to find the bed empty. Well, empty of Baekhyun. He’d let the door stay open for Gawa to jump into bed, as he is now halfheartedly wagging his tail, looking at you. The fact that he’s not already in your face, vying for your attention means Baekhyun has both walked and fed him. And that means he’s not angry with you about last night.

“Ay, ay”, you sigh getting out of bed, tying your robe tightly. “Maybe I should cut back even more on my hours like he wants. Whaddya say, Ga’? Staying home watching dramas all day, wouldn’t that be something?” 

 Shuffling out to the kitchen you see a note on the counter: “I’m meeting Seung Inc.redible ass for dinner. Home early, call me if you want take out.” Baekhyun always ends his notes with a star. Never a heart, or a smiley, but a star. Today it makes you pause, mulling last night over in your head. Not so much thinking as feeling. “Sweetie…” Nothing had happened, yet deep down you know something had. But since it is deep down you swat it away with ease, going about your day as planned. 

  Coming back to your apartment to find half of your plants either dead or hanging on to life by a thread was the twig that broke the back of your dubble home lifestyle. The surfaces being covered in dust and your clothes smelling stuffy was just icing on said broken back. 

“...and cleaning up feels like a waste since I’ll be gone and the same thing’s gonna happen..”, you complain over the phone to Baekhyun. 

“Sweetie..? Are you asking me if you can move in with me..?”, Baekhyun says at the other end. You can tell he has a smile on his face.

“Wha-no… I’m not”, you laugh, suddenly realising that’s exactly what it sounds like. “I was just venting.”

“So you don’t wanna move in with me?”

If you say yes it will really seem as if you were fishing, so you just stare at the phone. 

“You there…?”

“Yeah, I just… Are you really asking?”

“Yes…”

What you want to do is swing from your lamp like it’s a merry-go-round and scream, but you keep it cool, clearing your throat.

“Well, it’s a pretty big decision. Of course I’d say yes, but I have to confer with my associate.”

“This associate of yours, does it happen to be a big furry thing who is probably lying next to you, listening in..?”

“Maybe…”

“Mr. Gawa, I’m gonna make you an offer you can’t refuse.”

“Baekhyun! I’ve seen that movie - it’s not a good offer..!”, you holler.

“Okay, okay”, he laughs. “My offer is love. Good enough?”

You scrunch your face and smother a yelp of delight.

“Good enough, Baekhyun…”

“Great”, he huffs. “Typical Seung, calling to rain on my happy moment… You’ll come home tonight then?”

“My first night as the lady of the manor, wouldn’t miss it. Go easy on him..! Love you.”

“Love you. Bye.”

  You sit in disbelief for a moment. Did an everyday phone call with Baekhyun just end in you moving in with him? A dozen unfinished thoughts goes through your mind; giving up the apartment seems daunting somehow; what do I do with all my stuff; does he have room for what I wanna bring..? But it is mostly happy thoughts painted in pink.

“Hope this puts an end to the tiffs we’ve had lately. Brings it back to how it was before”, you sigh. “Look alive, Gawa - you’re moving up in the world..!”, you say, wrestling with him for a bit.

                                           ¤¤ 

“Agh!”, you huff, kicking your shoes off in the hallway and dropping your bag on the floor.

Baekhyun, for once home earlier than you, gives you a curious look from the sofa.

“Rough day?”

“My car won’t start..!”

“How’d you get home?”

“It was fine, but when I turned the ignition off my headlights wouldn’t go out, so I was gonna do it again, but it wouldn’t start. I’ve been sitting in the parking lot for fifteen minutes revving the engine like Wacky Races..! I had to cut the battery ‘cus of the lights”, you complain, slumping down next to him with your head in his lap. “I was so angry I almost forgot Ga’ in the car. Ahh, that fucking car, Baekhyun..!”, you laugh desperately.

“You gonna leave it at the shop?”

“I can’t afford it right now. Not again.”

“Don’t be silly, I’ll pay for it.” 

“I don’t want you to. I’ll take the bus.”

“What’s a bus?”, Baekhyun frowns, choking a smile.

You roll your eyes at him and shake your head, as if you don’t think him playing with high class manners is funny. 

“Wait, I wanna lie down”, he says, stretching out on the couch with you as his blanket.

“I’ll give you money for the cab tomorrow”, he says, kissing your hand.

“There’s no cab. I’m taking the bus. But thank you.”

“Some start to being the lady of the manor… Speaking of which, did you give your… How many months is the notice...?”

“Three. No, I…”, you pause.

Baekhyun shakes his head a little, a question.

“I thought you might wanna talk it over.”

“We already did..? You having second thoughts?”

“Of course not..! It was just in case, since I was whining about it, maybe you asked...on the spur of the moment, kinda?”

His honeyed laughter rings in your ears.

“You think I’d ask you to move in on the spur of the moment?”

“Well, no...when you say it like that it sounds different..!”

“ Ah, what to do with you, sweetie”, he sighs. “You wanna have a party maybe?”

“A party?”

“Not a rave, but invite a few people, you know.”

“Hm...eh, I hadn’t...hm, okay.”

“We don’t have to.”

“No, I just hadn’t thought about it. It’ll be fun, let’s do it. Wait, I don’t even know - do you have a storage room in the building? If my stuff can fit there or whether I should rent something?”

“You’re bringing your things here, aren’t you?”

“I mean the big things, my furniture and…”

“You don’t need them anymore, just throw them out? Or are you planning on leaving me..?”, Baekhyun teases.

“Nooo. But I spent money on them, I don’t wanna just chuck ‘em out.”

“It’s stupid, but do as you wish”, he sighs.

“It’s not. Humour me. For a while at least.”

In these mundane things is where your heart is, feeling Baekhyun’s breathing and warmth through his thin t-shirt while he watches the news, lightly scratching the nape of your neck, but otherwise paying no particular attention to you. 

                                         ¤¤ 

  Even though you at first hadn’t a thought of having a moving-in party, the thought really grew on you, and you decided to throw something together. It was all rather ad-hoc: drinks, ramyun, games, a few shiny balloons you’d gotten from work and a dozen guests. Most of them were from Baekhyun’s office, but that didn’t matter, you knew and liked them well enough. Oddly enough, Beanie hadn’t gotten back to you today. You knew she was coming, she’d been too excited about the news not to, but you couldn’t get a hold of her now. You’d been checking your phone so often it was borderline rude, so you’d left it in the kitchen for some peace of mind, but now hearing your ringtone you excuse yourself and dash to get it. It’s not her.

“Hey, I forgot the code to the gate..?”

“Didn’t I send you a text with it?”

“Oh… I forgot that to..! Sorry, be right up.”

  Without being unappreciative of the friends that are here you can’t help missing the one who isn’t. You could probably drink and laugh away the night with anyone of these people, but with Beanie it’s different. You don’t know if it’s because both of you are from “the other side of the tracks” and somehow ended up in fancy places, but you do know your connection with her was instant, like meeting your twin from another lifetime. You know her word is her bond and that’s why her silence unnerves you.

“Problem?”

A little startled, you spin around to see Baekhyun.

“Nah, just Katy asking for the code.”

“Really..?”, he frowns. “You seem a bit…” 

“I thought it might be Bean…”, you shrug your shoulders. “Can you try Minnie, please?”

“He’s out of town on business”, Baekhyun replies casually.

“What?”

“He had to go, sweetie.”

“Had to go? Don’t you decide that?”

“What’s your point?”

“Well… Why didn’t you tell me?” 

Baekhyun cocks his head to the side. It makes your chest tighten.

“You want me to ask you how to do my job?”

“Of course not”, you say, deflated. “I’m just disappointed.”

“Well, you have guests in the other room. Maybe you should think more about them instead of sitting in here having a tantrum over someone who doesn’t even answer your calls. Shouldn’t you?”

You don’t want to let Baekhyun off the hook for not telling you about Min, but you know it wouldn’t make a difference if you continued. 

“I just don’t get why Beanie’s not picking up… What if something’s wrong?”

“She has a kid, she’s probably busy. And at this hour”, he says, looking at his watch “...she probably has her phone on mute. Come on now. I spent a lot of money on this, you don’t wanna ruin it for everyone, do you?”

Letting his words sink in, logic and guilt alike, you come to terms with the situation and realise that you really don’t want to ruin it for everyone, or yourself. You shake your head with a crooked smile.

“That’s my girl. No more pouting”, Baekhyun says, with a light poke on your nose. 

  Getting into bed you look through your phone one last time; check the call log and text messages, in case you’ve somehow clicked Beanie away, but there’s nothing there. Now, with not so little alcohol in your system you don’t worry about her being okay, but about your friendship. Had you done something wrong? Or rather, did she think you had; had she misunderstood something maybe? You try to put it out of your mind, but it sits like a little pebble in your gut, only given a break by Baekhyun.

“Thank god they’re gone..!”, he exclaims, dragging you on top of him. 

“You talked the most, drank the most-”

“I was trying to scare them away”, he laughs between kisses. “Every fucking time you moved on the couch I imagined it was me under there… Now be a good girl and ride me, sweetie.”

                                        ¤¤ 

As you hadn’t been able to get a hold of Beanie the following couple of days you had made up your mind to go to her and Minnie’s home - one of these days. Deciding to do something and having the courage to do it can be two very different things, and it fell on divine intervention to push you forward.

Waiting for Baekhyun to pick you up from the mall you spot Minnie walking across the parking lot.

“Min..!”, you shout, zig-zagging your way through the parked cars.

He smiles when he spots you, but you detect a degree of discomfort in it.

“Oh, hi. What are you doing here?”

“I’ve been to lunch with my mom, just waiting for Baekhyun to pick me up.”

“Lunch date with mom, that’s nice. I haven’t seen you in a while, how are you?”, he asks, as he starts for his car again.

“I’m good. You?”

“I’m good, just came back from out of town-”

“Yeah”, you interrupt. “That’s actually what I wanted to ask you about… Is Beanie alright? She didn’t come to my party and I can’t get a hold of her.”

“Yeah, she’s fine. You know how it is, busy with the baby and all… She probably just forgot.”

 Even with his face turned away as he’s putting his bags in the trunk you can tell he’s not being honest. You’re not sure if you want to know why though. You study his face as he rounds the car to the driver’s door - he’s clearly uncomfortable, trying to force a normal demeanour, so you press him on it.

“But I don’t think she’d forget about it. Or not get in touch on her own - we talk almost every day, Min.”

“Shit...”, he says, fidgeting with the keys. “I asked her not to go, okay. To keep a little distance for a while.”

“From me? Why? I thought we were-”

“No, it’s…”

They way he’s frowning and struggling with his words you know why.

“Baekhyun asked me to”, he finishes, holding his hands up in defeat.

“What, no. You must’ve misunderstood, Min”, you say, not wanting to let on what you’re really thinking. “Why would he?”

“He didn’t say, he just… Aeh, you know what? Maybe I did misunderstand him. Talk to him when you see him, it’s probably nothing”, he says, getting into the car.

“Yeah, I’ll tell him you ruined my party over nothing”, you chuckle. “Tell Bean to answer next time, alright?”

“Will do. See you around?”

“See ya”, you say, waving him off.

  You spend the few minutes you have left to wait wondering - fearing - why Baekhyun would ask such a thing of Minnie. Actually, you’re not wondering at all - you know why. But if that’s the case what does it mean? Why wouldn’t he sit down with you and have a conversation about it like an adult? Why would he essentially order Min to keep her away? He must know what it looks like… And what would Beanie think it looks like? What the hell are you gonna tell her when you see her again? “If you see her, you mean? I will see her.” You promise yourself you won’t let Baekhyun get away with this, that you’re gonna have a proper talk about it. But your resolve gets a nick as soon as you get in the car, for a moment pretending that it might just be a misunderstanding…

“How’s your mom?”

“You know, same old, same old.”

“Nothing new on the westfront..?”, he smiles at you and takes your hand.

“Not much. But I saw Min. Bumped into him, I mean. Just now.”

You can’t tell if you sound casual. When Baekhyun tightens his grip on your hand you definitely feel less than casual.

“Hm. Beanie?”

“No, it was just him. He-”

“So what’d he say?”, he asks, keeping his eyes on the road.

This is your in, but you’re not as brave as you were five minutes ago. If you bring it up you can’t unsay it and everything that follows will be your doing; do you want to spend a wonderful evening with your man or do you want to walk around on glass shards?

“Beanie thinks you don’t like her…”

He spares you a quick glance with a furrowed brow.

“He said that?”

“Not exactly. He said, eh, I don’t wanna be a tattle tale...”

“What are you, ten years old?”, he scoffs. “We can talk about it when we get home”, he continues and lets go of your hand. 

 It’s sickening, the darkness that emanates from him. Even shifting in your seat to look out the window you feel like a bother to him. You don’t want to “talk about it”, you want to shout at him for trying to decide who your friends are, and for cutting you off. But you also wanna sweep it under the rug, beg his forgiveness with your saddest eyes and let him know he’s more important than anyone else.

                                            ¤¤

  From the garage to the elevator to the hallway, every step feels like you're walking closer to springing a bear trap you set for yourself.

“You’re hovering...”, Baekhyun notes when you stand by the kitchen island, watching him scroll through his phone.

“Well, you said...we were gonna talk…”

“What’s there to talk about?”

You look at him, dumbfounded, until he puts away his phone and raises a questioning eyebrow.

“Minnie. Did you say anything to him about Beanie? I’m hoping it’s a misun-”

“That he should keep her away? Yeah.”

“Why would you do that? She’s my friend!”

“Don’t raise your voice at me.”

“Baekhyun…”

You try to find the right words as your eyes start burning, but end up throwing your hands up in defeat.

“She’s my friend…”

“Sweetie”, he says, coming up to you, looking down at you. “I’ve known her longer than you, I think I know what’s best.”

“I can take care of myself. Make my own decisions.”

“Sure you can. But I’m the one who moved you from a tiny apartment to a skyrise flat, no?”, he chuckles.

You know he sometimes has a tendency to poke fun at you, but this was different. Going from letting you know it doesn’t matter what your paycheck says to making sure you know it does - the audacity doesn’t make you angry, it hurts you.

“Why do you have to put me down? Like in the car, when you called me ten..”

“What am I supposed to do with you when you act like this then?” Pausing, seemingly drawing pleasure from your expression he continues in a softer tone, putting his arms around you “I was only kidding, you’re too sensitive, sweetie.”

“I guess I am...”, you whisper, knowing you can’t make him listen anyway. “I’m gonna take Ga’ out.”

   Giving Baekhyun the silent treatment doesn’t work. He sees through it, thinks it’s childish and wants no part of it. Besides, he’s better at it than you are; making some calls, working in his home office, reading the paper while seemingly not noticing your silent rebellion. After a while the TV and Gawa can’t keep your fearful thoughts away, the ones where he decides you’re no fun anymore. The clock is creeping closer to dinner time and that’ll be make or break as you see it - making up and eating together or eating alone and making a bad situation worse. You don’t want to give up even more of your pride, but his silence won’t stop any other way. “And besides, a relationship is about diplomacy. Sometimes you have to let the other person win.. It’s normal.”

 You walk past his study and the kitchen to find him lying in bed with his phone. Quiet as a mouse you sit down on your end, suddenly scared it won’t work, that he’ll brush away your attempt at reconciliation like so many bread crumbs from the mattress. “Do I beg?” A part of you is disgusted with yourself because you know he’s waiting for you to crawl back. He doesn’t look at you when you turn around to face him, but oh, he’s waiting alright. Shuffling up next to him you cautiously lower yourself down, hoping he’ll let you in. When he moves his arm for you to lay down, putting it around you when you have, the release you feel is immeasurable. Winning or losing isn’t so important. Baekhyun is. He runs his hand over your hair, eyes still fixed on the phone, you stretch your arm out, tucking your fingers beneath his shirt to feel his warm torso. That other stuff may be important, but not right now. 

                                            ¤¤

“Dear Diary in my head… Why didn’t I say anything? I’m not afraid of him, so why was I afraid to? I was lazy ‘cus I didn’t wanna go on with the fight. But I’m not a fucking school girl wanting a boy’s approval, so I should’ve insisted. Now it sounds pathetic, “I should’ve insisted I be allowed to see Beanie”, like he’s my dad - shit, that’s what Beanie said… I AM allowed to see her, goddamn it, and I will, I don’t care. He’s the one being unreasonable - as if I love every single one of his friends..! If that article is what he's mad about it doesn't even make sense, ‘cus he’s not like that. But what if he is...like that rumour she was talking about… Jesus CHRIST, I’d know if he was! Now I’m just winding myself up ‘cus I’m irritated, stop it. I know how he is; hot headed in the moment, but forgets about it quickly. I mean what, he’s gonna hate on his colleagues wife forever? Ah-ah, he’ll get over it. And I need to stop being such a pushover when we argue, that’s for damn sure…”

                                           ¤¤ 

“How many times have you seen her?”, Baekhyun asks coldly, holding up your phone.

You hadn’t, as you first thought, forgot to take it with you to the bedroom last night - he’d taken it before you woke up. There’s no room for you to come up with a lie, white or other. Actually, this time there’s not even room for your dread as you immediately get pissed off at him for taking it.

“I didn’t opt out of having a password for you to go through my phone”, you say sternly, going to retrieve it from him. When he moves you fix your eyes on him “Baekhyun..!”

“How many times?”

“A few times. She’s my friend, and I missed her. I know y-”

“A few times?”

There’s a glint in his eye that makes you unsettled so you make like you’re starting breakfast, with him following you.

“What do you talk about?”

“Nothing. This and that…”

“For example..?”

“I don’t keep a log, do I?”, you mumble sarcastically, more to yourself than him. 

Before you have time to react he's grabbed your arm, making your head bounce against the wall.

"What did you just say?", he spits in your face, but seeing how you cower, eyes locked on his hand hanging in the air, he remembers himself. "So fucking dumb", he hisses, releasing his grip on you with a shove to the side.

Toppling over, trying to compose yourself you see him snatching his blazer from his seat before leaving. 

  In an instant Baekhyun has made you so small you feel that the chairs, table and island are all towering up around you where you sit on the floor. Your eyes are fixed on the door, terrified you’re going to see the lock turn open. You won’t hear it through the piercing sound in your ears. “He was gonna hit me…” Understanding he’s not coming back you stand up, bracing yourself against the wall. What now? You look around aimlessly, not even realising you’re clutching your arm, until you see your phone on the counter. Like a bolt the obvious answer hits you: “You can’t stay.”  Hurrying to the closet you grab one of Baekhyun’s overnight bags - he won’t miss it - and open the drawers, grabbing a handful of everything and stuffing them in it; tearing clothes off their racks, making the hangers fall to the floor with a clank and sweep toiletries in  with one movement. Lacing up your shoes your heart threatens to break your chest in half. You repeatedly call Gawa, then remember your mom’s had him a few nights.

“Where’s my...” You look around for your jacket in a fever, unable to focus. 

“Did he take my jacket? My keys...no...”, you think even though you’re certain you never saw him with it.

“Ah!”

 Running to your room you breathe a sigh of relief when you see it hanging on a chair; putting it on you check your pockets to see everything’s there and *qo...*. You freeze. Was that the bolt sliding? Not hearing any other sounds you slide your phone open, ready to call whomever, leaving sweat marks over the screen, and inch your way out to the dining room. 

“Baekhyun..?”

 Your bag is right there. If he’s somehow managed to come in without you hearing it, he’s seen it, and with the open floor plan the only doors in the apartment are on the bathroom, office and walk-in closet - all situated round the entrance. You can’t lock yourself in. Your gut churns as you expect him to round the corner with his head to the side - the way it always is when he disapproves of something. Feeling like he’s toying with you, you give way to despondency, wiping your tears before you keep walking and turn the corner. But he’s not there. The door is locked. You sink down on wobbly legs, catching your breath. Grabbing your bag you hear that sound again, and realise it was just a glass bottle in the bag settling, knocking against another one. 

“Fuck! Jesus Christ…”

 Sitting down you start thinking about where to go. In the back of your head you’d assumed your mom’s place, but now you see there are only two ways that could go: you don’t tell her why, so she’ll invite Baekhyun in when he comes looking or you do tell her and she’ll insist you report him to the police. But what’s there to report? “He DIDN’T hit me. He grabbed your arm! Yeah, he grabbed my arm in a fight when he found out I’d been lying to him… They won’t do anything…”

“Why did I lie to him..! None of this would've happened if I’d been honest, just told him the first time I saw her. And if I hadn’t acted like that when he asked… Of course he'd be angry, anyone would. Being angry is one thing, punching someone is different. But he didn't… I mean, haven't I been so annoyed I've wanted to hit him? It's not the same thing! Why not? Because he happens to be stronger than me? It's still violence...You KNOW why it isn't… If he HAD, sure, I'd never let him near me again, but he didn’t. He wouldn’t… He wouldn’t.”

 Going back and forth with yourself in your head was just a formality and a way to convince yourself you're the type of person that 1: won't tolerate being treated like shit, and 2: would give someone a second chance. “Everyone deserves a second chance. At least a chance to explain themselves.” 

Putting your things back you make sure they are exactly as they had been, while ignoring the voice that asks why you’re worried he might be able to tell a difference. Now there’s nothing left to do but somehow pass the excruciatingly long hours until he gets off work...

                                        ¤¤

 Not hearing from Baekhyun all day had you go from thinking he’d been wrong to fearing he’d still think you were.

If you can forgive him then surely he can forgive you, right? If he’s still angry, you’ll make an effort; if he doesn't say anything about it, neither will you. You’ll go on as usual, have a visit with your mom, be fine. 

Standing in front of the mirror in your closet, trying to figure out what top to wear has a different feeling to it today; you're trying to cover up your arm. There isn't any bruising on it as far as you can tell, but you never know… When the lock turns your pulse goes up. You’ve been anxiety ridden all day, as well as longing for him to come home, so you can really put this thing past you and go back to normal. 

He peeks in through the door with a gentle smile and presents a bouquet - yellow peonies.

"I think roses are the official flower of apology, but I know how you love these."

“He’s not mad, thank God, he’s not mad…” 

"I don't know what came over me”, he starts, coming up to you. “It must be all the stress at work, with the buy-out and I… I would never hurt you! When I saw that look in your eyes I couldn’t believe what I was doing-”

“Why didn’t you call me all day?”, you ask, teary-eyed with relief.

“I wanted to, sweetie, but I...every time I picked up the phone I saw that look and I didn’t know what to say… I’ll never hurt you again, I swear.”

“You real...really scared me”, you manage to say through choppy breaths.

“I know. I’ll do whatever you want, give you anything you want”, he says, hugging you tightly “...just forgive me.”

You don’t take pleasure in seeing him distraught, but note that suddenly the roles are reversed - he’s the one pleading, and you have the power to lift him up.

“You have to promise me, Baekhyun.”

“I promise, sweetie. I promise..!”

He tips your head up by the chin:

“You believe me, right?"

With such sincerity in his eyes and tremble in his voice, how could you not?

“Good”, he says when you nod, giving you your long awaited kiss. “I’m so sorry…”

“Let’s...”, you exhale deeply, turning to the mirror again.“Let’s not talk about it anymore, okay?”

“Sure. What are you up to?”

“I'm just deciding what to wear. We have to be at my mum's in forty-five minutes, so if you're gonna shower before we go…”

Coming up to stand behind you in the mirror, the way he puts his hands on your shoulders makes you wince, if ever so slightly. But he doesn't notice. 

"Do you really think it's a good idea for us to go over there today? I think we could really need this time for ourselves. Don't you agree?"

"But I've already told her we're coming over…"

"I know, but with everything that's been going on… Tell you what...You go put these in water and I'll give her a call, tell her I've got a migraine."

"I have to get Gawa, she's had him four days already", you say, happy to have found a good reason for going over.

"She won't mind will she?", he asks, spinning you around to look you in the eyes. "Aren't I as important as him? I've really missed you today, sweetie."

You don't want to upset him again, and you've really missed him too. So you give in. 

Curled up on the sofa with your head on Baekhyun's chest, his fingers are playing with your hair.

"Sweetie? Have you thought about maybe letting your mum have Gawa?"

"Have him? Past tomorrow?"

"Keep him. For good, I mean."

"What? No, why?"

"Don't get upset", he says soothing you. "I don't mean he can't come over from time to time."

A sickening feeling creeps into your heart, but not wanting to risk another fight so soon you hold your tongue. Nonchalantly flipping through the channels on the TV he adds:

"We don't have to decide anything now. It's just...something to think about."

                                            ¤¤ 

  Drying your hands after finishing up the dishes at your mom's you hear Baekhyun from the living room:

"... to have him full time."

Your stomach's in knots as you join them. Baekhyun smiles and grabs your hand. 

"I was just telling your mom how we think she should keep Gawa - if you want to, of course", he adds thoughtfully, looking at your mom. 

"But he's your everything, honey", your mom, correctly, points out. "Why would you ev-"

She cuts herself off with eyes growing wide.

"Are you pregnant..!? Oh, oh..!", she blurts out before you can stop her.

"No!"

Baekhyun bursts out laughing, pulling you to sit on his lap.

"Not yet, mother. But who knows, might not be too long before you hear the tapping of little feet around here…", he jokes.

At least you hope he is. Not feeling entirely comfortable with the turn the conversation has taken, you get up, calling Gawa to you. 

"Well, I guess we should be going, mom. Come on, Baekhyun, Ga'."

There's a flicker in Baekhyun's eyes, but you know he won't make a scene in front of your mom.

"We'll give you some time to think about it", he says, hugging her goodbye. 

You can feel the cold emanating from him like dry ice in the elevator. 

"I'll drop you off at home before I head into the office", he says, clearing his throat. 

"It's Saturday, you're off."

"I might as well get some work done if you don't want to be with me. If you choose that animal over me."

                                         ¤¤

  Forty-eight hours ago you had been looking forward to the weekend; visiting your mom with your handsome, successful boyfriend and winding down with the love of your life - Gawa. But nothing had gone the way you had imagined. Even after the incident it was as if Baekhyun hadn't let go of your arm, keeping you under his eye and forcing you to prove your loyalty to him. But then again, you had just been through something big, however short it was. It was only natural he'd want a little more attention from you than normal, right? He probably didn't mean for you to give Gawa up for good, it was just bad wording. He loved seeing you happy, why else would he buy you flowers and jewellery, insist that you cut back your hours at work to be home more, call you every other hour to say hi? 

  Thinking about it in those terms made it simple - if not easy - for you to do what he wanted. Because he was what you wanted, wasn't he? So, not having told him you were returning Gawa to your mom the same day you were waiting for him to come back home. What had started as excitement about pleasing him had, as the hours passed, turned into a tremendously guilty conscience and now, lying in bed as he approaches, you can't even pretend to be happy.

"Why is it so dark in here?", he asks, throwing his blazer on the bed. "Where's Ga'? Gawa..!", he calls.

"He's not here", you answer him, your back still turned against him. "He's with mom…"

"Oh, sweetie", he sighs, laying down behind you, giving you a kiss on the neck. "I didn't mean for you to take him back today. Turn around, let me see that pretty face. That's better", he says, brushing the hair out of your eyes.

"My red eyes and runny nose is better?", you pout, partly fishing for a compliment. 

"Mm-hm. Of course I don't like to see you sad, but I really appreciate what you've done. It shows that you respect me. That you really care about me."

Little by little his words push away your melancholy. The way he's looking at you now, with his gentle brown eyes and sweet smile, prickles your skin. This is the reaction you had wanted from him.

"And besides…", he continues, slipping his hand under your t-shirt "I've been thinking about what your mother said… About a baby."

"No. Baekhyun, that's insane. That’s…"

"Why? Too soon? Who decides that? Look...", he says, nudging your t-shirt up to show your stomach "...can't you imagine a little Baekhyun growing in here? Or my daughter? Walking in the park with the stroller, showing the baby to everyone at work… I’d show you off to everyone the minute I found out."

“Aeh..”, you swat your hand as he gets up, but when he’s out of the room you scrunch your face with delight at the thought of it. Somehow you can see it. But in your stomach isn't just the butterflies of an imagined little life - it’s the whispered knowledge that you've left the right love behind.

[leafs-lover]

Because Two People Got Drunk: 18

A/N: Bold is text messages. There really isn’t a lot of development, more so a smut chapter.

Summary: As Valentine’s Day approaches you and Fred take steps forward in your relationship.

Warnings: Swearing, Angst (maybe?) Smut, male and female masturbation, phone sex, anal sex (just a lot of sex).

Word Count: 4700

Series Masterlist

Chapter 18

February 14, 2023

“Are those yummy?” you say watching your son eat his heart shaped pancakes. “How about you eat some of the fruit though bud” you joke.

“He has maple syrup, why would he eat fruit” Fred laughs over Facetime.

When he has been at home you have been spending some time as a family, but you still have nights apart at your own apartments. You have been at your apartment recently, as he is on the third day of his road trip.

You haven’t discussed labels, but you have been talking on the phone more than normal. While it wasn’t unusual for you to Facetime during road trips so he could see Oliver, it was uncommon for him to call multiple times a day, or when he knows Oliver is asleep just to catch up with him, but this had become the norm during this road trip.

“Yeah I should have given him the pancakes after, but these are super cute” you explain tilting the phone for Fred to see.

“Not as cute as my Valentine though” you say “I mean he has syrup on his face, smushed blueberry in his hair, strawberry juice has dribbled down his chin onto his chest. Every girls dream.” you place a kiss on Oliver’s cheek.

“Thought you don’t like Valentine’s Day. Two years ago you told me it was a stupid glorified holiday” he says.

“I believe I said restaurants, flowers, chocolate weren’t the real meaning of the day. Not that it was stupid” you explain when you hear a knock at the door. “I’ll be right back someone is at the door.”

A couple minutes later you walk back in to the room carrying a bouquet of white lilies.

“So you remember I said flowers aren’t the meaning of Valentine’s Day, but you still bought me some" you say setting the gorgeous bouquet on the counter.

“Not from me, maybe you should check the tag” he says. You reach over and pull the tag and read it.

You laugh slightly “I see you found a loop hole.” You hold the tag up “these are from Oliver.”

“Wow so thoughtful of him” Fred jokes. “Anything else come with them?”

“No, just this. Why?”

“No reason. I have to go to morning skate, talk to you later. Bye Ollie, love you.”

You continue on with your day, a few hours later you are watching it snow when there is a knock at the door. You open to find 3 different sized boxes waiting for you. They are all neatly wrapped in white paper, with a silver bow.

You take a picture and send it to Fred.

(Y/N): this just arrived at me place. Any idea what they are?

F: Nope. Not from me 🤷‍♂️

(Y/N): Guess I will just open them now :)

F: Just wait for me to finish dinner then we can open them.

(Y/N): Hurry up or I will sneak a glance ;)

An hour later you finish putting Oliver to bed when you feel your phone vibrate in your pocket.

“Hey” you whisper

“Hey, why are you whispering?”

“Just put Oliver to bed" you whisper turning the camera to face him so Fred can see him sleeping in his Penguins pyjamas.

“He was up a little late today”

“Yeah he was protesting bedtime, it was a fun night. How was dinner?” you ask. Fred sets the phone against the wall and begins to tell you about his evening. You are paying attention until you notice Fred is getting changed from his dinner outfit. You watch Fred unbuckle his belt, and pull his pants down leaving him in his boxers. You stare at his thick thighs, a soft moan slips from your mouth as he bends over, grabbing a pair of pants from his bag.

He quickly turns around as a blush creeps over your cheeks, “checking me out?”

“No I wasn’t” you quickly lie.

“No need to be shy” he says holding the phone up to his face.

“I uh, I was -"

“You’re cute when you’re flustered.”

“Can I open my Valentine’s Day gifts now” you ask trying to change the subject.

He laughs “for someone who doesn’t like Valentine’s Day gifts you are awfully excited.”

“I never said I don’t like presents. I just don’t think they are necessary, and on point with the day. But they are here so I can’t let them go to waste.”

Fred chuckles “okay go ahead, what one do you want to open first?”

“Oooh I want to open the big box first!” you exclaim grabbing the box.

He laughs “okay, that’s something for when I get back”

You slide the bow off before removing the sparkly white paper. You open the lid to the box and peel back the white tissue paper and see black lace crotchless lingerie with garters. You clench your legs together thinking of how you’ll definitely need your favourite toy later that night. “I see" you clear your throat “and uh, when will you be back?”

Fred chuckles “5 days.”

“Hmph. That’s so long” you wine.

“You’re telling me. I have to spend the next 5 days thinking of what you’ll look like in that.” That causes you to laugh slightly “I want the little one now” you say tearing the paper off and opening the box. You pull out 2 different size plugs. Fred laughs “that’s a just in case present.”

You raise an eyebrow “in case you want to, you know” he pauses as a blush crosses his face.

“Do that again?” you continue as he smiles nodding.

“It was fun last time" he finally adds in.

You smile at him “Yeah it was” you say reminiscing the last time; you can feel yourself soaking through your underwear. Its crazy how just a few words or his brown eyes glancing at you can have you falling apart. “Okay now the last one"

“The really fun one" he says. You tear off the paper before holding it up to the camera. “So I know you take care of yourself, I heard you through the door last Christmas.” A blush creeps across your face soft oh leaves your lips.

“Don’t be shy skat, it’s hot. When I think of what you’re doing without me I immediately get hard. But I want to take care of you when I’m on the road, or those nights when you opt to not hang out with me, I want to show you what you are missing out on.”

He pulls his phone into the screen “I’m talking to you on my tablet. Now get into bed so I can treat you right.”

You give him a questioning look as he pulls his phone into the cameras view. “It is Bluetooth and I have the app on my phone, I set it all up before I left.”

“How are you going to use this and talk to me?” you ask.

You listen running down the hall to your room. You close the door and set him on the side table while you take your shorts and underwear off and climb in. You are so excited you are practically dripping down your legs. “Shirt babe” Fred says. You peel the shirt over your head and unclasp your bra freeing your tits.

“Fuck I love your tits” he says through the screen as you run your hand over one, gently playing with the nipple. You stare at Fred through the screen, as you rub your nipple through your fingers. You continue to massage yourself keeping eye contact; Fred pulls his boxers off freeing himself. You hear his hard member slap against his stomach before he grabs himself in his large hand and begins stroking himself.

“I wish this was your hand” you moan “or your mouth.”

“Fuck, me too babe. Move the camera" you lower it to closer to your core where you know he wants to see. “You wet?”

“Mhm I’m soaked. I have been since you took your pants off” you say bringing the toy down and sliding it along your folds a few times lathering it in your juice.

“I knew you were looking" he says chuckling as you grin “slide it in.” You oblige and push it in as your breath catches in your throat, you hear Fred groan through the screen. The vibration start to turn on, you feel some different paces and patterns as you moan loudly.

“Ohh” you moan loudly as a very fast pace starts, then you feel it slow down. Fred plays around with the settings trying to determine what you like best.

“Set me up so I can watch your face and you pussy. I want to watch will I destroy you” he says into the phone.

“Fuck” you mutter while you bring the camera beside you propping it on the table. Fred is stroking himself at a faster pace while staring directly at you; you feel the vibrations become very intense.

“Babe if you do that I’m not going to last" you say as Freddie grins.

“You’ve never said no to two before" he smirks. “You’re close eh?”

The vibration becomes even more intense as you cry out as your orgasm tears through you. Your hands grip the bedsheet, knuckles going white. You almost pass out it’s so intense; you whisper Fred’s name and various curse words.

He keeps the pace on high until you come around from your orgasm. He lowers the speed slightly, but it’s still a lot for your sensitive cunt.

“Fred” you pant “it’s to…I need…fuck” you moan the pace increasing slightly preventing you from forming a coherent thought.

“No it’s fine; I know you can handle it.”

“No. Fred. Fuck” you scream your legs sliding on the bed.

You feel your second orgasm approaching, still not recovered from the last one. You close your eyes and moan loudly indicating you are very close when you hear Fred “not yet, wait for me"

Your eyes snap open and you look to the screen and see Fred pumping himself. “You have you wait for me.” The vibrations change slightly

“I can’t” you whine.

“Wait for me" he snaps, vigorously pumping himself.

“I wish that was me" you say trying to bring his high faster. He looks to your eyes “wish it was my pussy wrapped around you. That you would finish deep inside me, filling me with your warmth.”

You hear him mutter Danish curse words. Your high is so close and you will do anything to get him to his when you feel the pace speed up to the highest setting.

Your head falls back as you groan, gripping the bedsheet, your toes curling. “Fuck" you spit out as you clench around the toy. You are unable to hold it back, but you don’t care. Your legs shake as you clench the sheets tight; a loud moan leaves your lips. You look into the screen just as Fred reaches his climax, Danish curse words spewing from his lips as white ribbons spill onto his stomach.

“That was" you start to say out of breath, as your eyes are shut.

“Fred” you moan, the toy is still inside you vibrating inside you. You expect him to turn the toy off, but instead you feel the vibrations changing. Different rhythms and patterns pulse inside you, you are so sensitive you reach down to pull it out but are unable to focus enough.

You feel the vibrations slow down and you finally open your eyes and look at Fred. Your hand reaches and grabs the end of the toy “no don’t” Fred says through the phone.

“What?” you ask. “I don’t think… there was two…I can’t” you whine. The vibrations are on a low setting, but you can still feel it inside your walls.

“If you really can’t I’ll turn it off skat. But I know you and your body, if I was there you would be having another” he says moving closer to the camera.

“We both know you can” he smirks at you. “The first night you had 4, and you’ve done it a few times since then too.”

“Freddie” you groan your tone more stern than before.

You take a deep breath; you didn’t even notice that the speed of the toy had picked up its speed inside you until you moan loudly and grip the sheets. “I knew you wanted another” he says. “Move the phone lower for me skat I want to watch.”

You pant looking at him, still feeling the slight vibrations from inside you. He smirks at you before continuing “the first one would have been my mouth. I would have licked up your folds a few times before slipping my tongue inside you. I would lick up inside your walls and suck on your clit, my face pressed hard into you.”

“Fuck” you mumble as Fred keeps talking. “I would take my time drawing your orgasm from you, your juices finally dripping down my face. Just as you recover I would slip my fingers in you. They would be curled deep inside you hitting your g-spot. They would be moving fast, your second orgasm quickly approaching.”

You oblige and move the phone down “Freddie” you groan. “What else would you be doing to me?” you ask.

A devilish grin comes across his face, and a chuckle leaves his lips. “Well after you finish on my fingers, soaking them in your cum I would stop them inside you, giving you a minute to relax. When your breathing has returned to normal I would pull my fingers from you, drawing a light whimper from your lips.”

The vibrations have increased to a fast pace, your legs squirming slightly. “Then I would slip inside of you, pumping slowly in…”

“No fast” you cry out “faster Freddie!”

You feel the toy increase to the fastest speed of the night as he continues to talk to you. You don’t hear any words he is saying as the ball deep in your stomach begins to bubble up. You hear a few words as you try to hold the phone steady for Freddie to watch you. Your third and final orgasm comes, exploding from you.

“Oh my god” you whisper when you refocus and realize the toy has stopped, you slowly pull it out of you and take a few deep breaths.

“Skat” you hear and you pull the phone up to look at him and see it is covered in a sticky mess. “You squirted babe” he chuckles. You think for a second before realizing what he said and what is coating your screen.

“Oh my god” you bring your other hand to your face trying to hide the embarrassment.

“(Y/N/N) don’t hide your face that was fucking hot” he says as you bring your arm down and attempt to clean your screen. “We’re definitely doing that tomorrow night” he says causing you to laugh, but also agree.

 “Hey” you squeal jumping into Fred’s arms as he drops his bag at the door to catch you. His strong arms wrap around you as he carries you to the couch, you peppering his jaw and neck with kisses. He sits down as you cuddle into his arms “missed you too” he laughs, kissing you on the lips.

He played a game in North Carolina and as soon as he got off the plane he came right to your place to see you and Oliver. He told you the trip was really long, and he didn’t want to wait until the following morning to see either of you.

He brushes the hair from your face gently “you didn’t have to wait up for me” he says seeing your heavy eyes. “Yes I did, you don’t have a key” you say groggily snuggling in closer.

“Well go to bed dear; I’ll be there in a bit. Just going to unwind a bit.”

“No, I’m want to stay here with you, I missed you it was a really long road trip” you sigh “and you smell really good.” He chuckles kissing your head, he strokes your hair as you doze off. You stir slightly an hour later when Fred shifts under you. You look up at him as you lean in closer and wrap your hand around his neck. “I was trying not to wake you" he says carrying you bridal style to bed.

He gently places you on the bed and pulls the duvet up over you. He crawls in beside you and gently kisses your lips before you fall back asleep.

“Is that yummy bud?” you ask as he is eating cheerios with his hands, slobber everywhere.

“Dadda” Oliver says smiling. Fred walks over and picks him up “Hey Ollie, I missed you so much little man” he gives him multiple kisses on his cheeks causing Oliver to laugh.

Fred puts him back in his highchair and looks to you seeing the massive smile on your face. “What” he asks.

“Nothing that was just really cute” you explain sipping your coffee.

“I am pretty cute” he jokes pouring himself a coffee. “I ordered dinner for tonight. Thought we could have a family dinner, I’m off today...”

You kiss him on the cheek “sounds perfect.”

Later that night you stand in your closet looking for an outfit. It’s just a night in with the three of you, but you haven’t seen him in so long. You plan on wearing the lingerie Fred bought you and consider dressing up but ultimately settle on something simple, opting for leggings and a sweater.

Before pulling your leggings you open the box with the two plugs Fred bought for you. You coat one in lube and gently slide it in, moaning at the feeling before pulling your leggings on overtop your lingerie. During dinner Fred tells you stories about the road trip and you try to listen, but most of your attention is focused on the feeling of your ass. Oliver babbles to himself, likely inputting more to the conversation than you do.

After dinner Fred takes Oliver to bed and you pull off your clothes, leaving you in your lingerie. He walks into the kitchen to get a drink without looking to you in the living room. “You alright (Y/N/N) you seemed distracted tonight.” He questions finally looking to you “fucking hell” he mumbles “didn’t think this would look this good.” You laugh as his lips crash into your capturing you in a sloppy kiss.

His hands slide gently down your back, grazing your ass. You shutter as he grazes the plug you have inserted. “You’re killing me babe" he groans as you raise your eyebrow to him. 

He immediately rids himself of his pants and you see how tight his boxers are, his erection straining his fabric.

“Miss me babe?” you question innocently.

He drops his boxers, his cock springing free as he sits down pulling you onto his lap. He pushes two fingers in gently to your folds “you have no idea” he slowly fucks you on his fingers allowing you to adjust to the feeling with a plug in. 

He picks you up and brings you to the bedroom, you see him gulp as he turns you around. His hand caresses your ass a few times before he gently pulls the plug out of you, setting it on your dresser. He pushes you forward to the bench at the end of your bed. He slides his two fingers back inside of you, pumping them in and out. He pulls his fingers out and you spread your legs. Your brace yourself on the bench as he slides into you, his fingers dance near your sensitive hole.

He bottoms out before almost pulling completely out, his hands tightly grip your hips as he pulls you back onto you. You moan loudly as he pumps in and out of you. “Fuck babe” he groans pulling you back, your ass hitting his pelvis.

He reaches around to pull your breast, pulling the fabric down. He massages it and pinches your nipple, all while continuing to thrust into you. He moves his hand up to grip your throat and he pulls you up closer to him. Your back is pressed against him as he bites into your neck. You groan loudly as your orgasm comes over you. You thought your legs were going to give out as you spasm around him.

Fred keeps his pace pounding into you, his hand wrapped tightly around your throat. He releases your throat bringing his hand back to your hips, you feel him getting sloppy behind you as he pushes hard into you. He spills deep inside you, his fingers digging into your hips holding you in place.

He stayed inside you for a minute before finally pulling out of you; you collapse on the bench as Fred falls onto the bed beside you. He brushes your hair from your eyes and smiles at you “you’re incredible you know that?” he questions lightly.

He slides down the bed, his face in line with yours. He kisses you passionately; you finally pull away push on the bench to get up. Fred quickly grabs your wrist and brings it to his semi-hard member. You smile and take him in your hand stroking him up and down; you bring your lips to his and kiss him. As you lean in further Fred pulls away from you and gets out of bed. You look at him confused as he places his hand on your back and pulls your lingerie down your thighs. You move to roll onto your back, but Fred firmly grips your hips holding you in place.

“You didn’t think we were done did you?” he questions running his hand down your spine and over your ass. His finger dances around your hole “you got this all ready for me skat” gripping your ass tighter. “Be a shame to let it go to waste eh?” he questions as a whimper leaves your lips. He moves to the side table and grabs the bottle of lube, when he returns you have lowered your face to the bench sticking your ass out for him.

Fred chuckles as he coats your hole slowly pumping his finger in your hole. He pulls his finger out and you feel his tip nudge your hole, he slowly pushes in you and you cry out gripping the bench.

“You okay?” he asks stilling inside you.

“Yes. I’m so good” you hiss, you feel Fred slowly pull out and rock back into you. He sets a slow pace; gently pulling you back onto him, pumping in and out with ease. “Babe” you groan pushing yourself back fully. You pull forward and begin to increase the speed of your hips, Fred notices and his speed matches yours.

“You feel so good” he mumbles thrusting in you. His grip is firm, his nails digging crescents into your hips. Your knuckles go white as you tightly grip the bench below you; you begin to feel your walls tightening around him.

“Fuck babe, you close?” Fred asks feeling you tightening around him. You whine out in response as your head falls onto the bench while he rocks into you. His pace is fast, and you can feel him becoming sloppy behind you.

Your pleasure is building up, and you feel waves of pleasure coming over you. Your face is rubbing against the fabric of the bench as your ass contracts around Fred.

“Fuck smuk” you hear behind you as Fred pulls out. You collapse on the bench and you feel warm ribbons coat your back and ass. You lay there for a minute when you feel Fred pick you up and carries you to the bathroom turning on the shower. He gently strips your remaining lingerie off of you, your legs are still uneasy so Fred holds you in place, peppering you with kisses on your neck and jaw. He pulls you into the shower; your arms snaked around his neck for support. You pull your head back and kiss him while the warm water hits your back. Fred reaches behind you and grabs your shampoo, gently massaging it in your hair. He pulls the removable shower head off and gently washes the shampoo out of you.

He puts it back on the holder and massages conditioner into your hair. You look up at him grip his hair tightly and pull his lips down to yours. He pushes you back against the cool tile and kisses you lightly. He pulls back and places soft kisses on your cheek, as his hands are on your hips. He presses his forehead to yours looking deeply into your eyes while you gently run your hands through his hair.

“Du er utrolig” he whispers before he gently glides you into the water stream rinsing out your conditioner. Next he reaches for your body wash and lathers you in your pomegranate body wash, upon rinsing you off he kisses you on the lips.

A few moments later he wraps a towel around you and gently dries you off. He leaves and comes back with track pants on as he hands you your pyjamas. You walk over to the sink and start brushing your teeth as he comes up beside you doing his. He stares at you through the mirror the entire time. You spit the toothpaste out and rinse your mouth; you move to leave the bathroom when he pulls you back.

He reaches to get the shampoo when he notices you have bought his brand of body wash and shampoo products. He looks at you and you just shrug your shoulders “you’re here enough, figured you would like to use your own stuff.”

He kisses your cheek “thanks, but I do like smelling like you” he says. You laugh while he quickly washes himself off.

You crash into his hard chest as he bends down putting his hand on your thighs lifting you up with ease. He carries you into the bedroom, and lies down keeping you on top of him, your hand and head resting on his chest. You listen to his heart beat, as he gently strokes your side.

Fred breaks the silence “what are we doing (Y/N/N)?”

You turn slightly to look into his brown eyes as he searches yours for an answer. “This has been fun and all, but I can’t keep doing this if it’s only fun.”

“I don’t know what we’re doing Fred” you explain. He goes to turn his head to look away but you reach up turning his jaw to keep his eyes locked on you. “I don’t know where we are heading, but I don’t want to stop. I’m enjoying this, all of it. The cuddles, the conversations, the sex” you say with a grin and chuckle “and the family time. But” you pause for a minute before continuing “but I also enjoy having time apart. I want to keep seeing you, but also have time and space away from you if that makes sense.”

“Yeah it does” he says softly but you don’t think he fully agrees.

“I’m just not ready to move in and be with you 100% of the time, I’m not there.” You reach into your side table and pull out a small velvet box and hand it to him. He gives you a questioning look before he opens it and pulls out a key as a smile crosses his face. “So I don’t have to stay up until 2am waiting for you” you explain.

“So you want to live apart and keep up with the shared custody. But also go on dates and have family time the three of us?” he asks closing the box, setting it on the table beside him.

“Yeah” you say softly “is that okay?”

Fred stares into your eyes before pulling you in softly for a kiss “yeah, it sounds perfect.” You lay your head back on his chest and listen to the gentle sound of his heart beat as you fall asleep.

Next Chapter

[luci-in-trenchcoats]

Won’t You Stay (Part 10)

Summary: The reader meets a few of Jensen’s friends but ends up having a bad morning when she wakes up late for work...

Masterlist

Pairing: Jensen x Director!reader

Word Count: 2,900ish

Warnings: language, angst, implied past domestic abuse

A/N: Please enjoy!

_____

“Ackles,” said a tall guy when you got to the restaurant that night. He gave you a smile as you took a seat at the table, a woman sitting next to him. “You must be Y/N. I’m Jared.”

“I’m Gen,” said the woman, giving you a friendly smile.

“Hi,” you said, looking at them both. “You two seem familiar.”

“We did Supernatural with Jensen,” said Jared. “I was on all three seasons with him. Gen joined the last before I locked that down.”

“These losers are married,” teased Jensen. “At least I did not have to third wheel again.”

“So what’s it like having your girlfriend boss you around all day?” said Jared with a smile.

“Oh you wish you were in my position, buddy,” said Jensen. 

“You will learn very quickly these two turn into toddlers around each other,” said Gen. “They’d be joined at the hip if they could be.”

“I’m going to take a wild guess and say Jared’s the friend Jensen does his check in thing with?” you asked.

“You wouldn’t be wrong,” chuckled Jared. He glanced at Jensen and you looked down, feeling a foot tap your own. You lifted your head and saw Jared giving you a smile. “It’s not a secret or anything. I could do worse for a brother.”

“Aw,” said Jensen, Jared rolling his eyes.

“He’s very much a loser if you haven’t realized that yet,” said Jared.

“Losers are cooler than people think,” you said.

“Told you I liked this girl,” said Jared as the waiter came back over. 

Fifteen minutes later you had your food and Gen was already inviting you to a girls night dinner. You watched Jensen interact with his friends, smiling when you saw how he was with Jared. There was something sweet about it. If you didn’t know better, you would have thought they were real brothers. You liked that he had a friend like that, especially in the acting industry when people were known for throwing each under the bus.

“Y/N, wanna go to the bathroom with me?” asked Gen. 

“Sure,” you said, leaving your napkin on your seat as you went back with her. She used the restroom for a moment while you waited by the sink, smiling when she came out. 

“So it’s been awhile since Jensen’s had a girlfriend I’ve heard. I’ve never seen him even go on a date,” she said.

“He said he’s been on a break from them for a while,” you said. She dried off her hands and hummed. 

“You must be special then,” she said. You swallowed and she smiled. “Listen. He deserves to be happy and so do you. You two seem to like each other so I’m all for it. Those two boys are going to be besties for life so we’ll probably see a lot of each other.”

“I’ve barely been dating him. I don’t know…” you shrugged. She smiled and nodded. “I’m just enjoying it right now.”

“Probably the smart move,” she said, fixing her hair in the mirror. You pursed your lips and looked at your own reflection. Jensen’s hat was backwards on your head, hiding the flyaways you had from the rollercoasters that afternoon. You touched the end of your side braid. You weren’t even wearing any makeup. “You do realize he’s been drooling over you since the second you walked in the door, right?”

“Yeah but I mean I’m not an idiot. Guys like it when we look pretty and dress up,” you said.

“They also like it when we wear their stuff,” she said. “Relax. This was totally last minute anyways. I was literally in my underwear when I met Jared for the first time. I was mortified.”

“Seriously?”

“Yeah. It was our first scene together. He was late that day so he showed up on set and I was like awesome, let’s meet the cute guy when I’m half naked,” she said.

“I was kinda mad that our original lead actor dropped out and they had an emergency casting call. But Jensen was late to it. I didn’t know what he looked like. I went to take a walk around the block to relax and this guy kind of grabbed me and started bothering me. Jensen came out of nowhere and got me out of there while he dealt with the guy. Ten minutes later I find out he’s the guy that’s supposed to be auditioning in my movie.”

“Oh wow. I assumed you just met on set,” she said.

“No. He found out who I was the next day,” you said. “He asked me out the night before.”

“He’s the kind of guy that does that sort of thing, helps people I mean,” she said.

“I’m starting to get that,” you said.

“Maybe you help him,” she said. You raised an eyebrow and she shrugged. “Like I said. I’ve never seen him on a date. I don’t think Jared has either.”

“I just like him,” you said.

“Good,” she said, grabbing your hand. “Come on and split some dessert with me. I want to see that boy blush over you more.”

“I like her,” you said to Jared as you walked out of a bar later that night, Gen walking ahead with Jensen, the two of them chatting about you if you had to guess. “She’s cute.”

“Yes, she is. Jensen mentioned you were pretty cute too,” said Jared. “He’s been talking about you for weeks now. I was wondering when we’d get to meet.”

“Work keeps me pretty busy,” you said.

“I love the book by the way,” he said. “Jensen was bouncing off the freaking wall when he got the part. You have no idea how happy that made him.”

“He was very good. He got the part all on his own,” you said. “He’s a good actor.”

“He is. Any guy our age would kill to get to play opposite Ethan Y/L/N,” said Jared. “He says that’s nothing compared to you though.”

“What do you mean?”

“He likes the atmosphere you create on set,” said Jared. “He’s making me jealous almost. I’d love a director that cares more about the people making something than profits and marketing.”

“If I don’t screw this up and end up directing more, come look me up. Jensen’s friends are more than welcome on my sets,” you said. 

“I’ll take you up on that. I think you’re too hard on yourself. You’ll do fine with it,” said Jared.

“How would you know that? We just met after all.”

“Do you know why Jensen checks in on me everyday?” he asked, slowing his walk. “He worries about me. Sometimes I listen to the crap in my head too much. I had a rough go of it once. He was there for me. He’s still there for me. It doesn’t matter where or when. I can always go knock on his door and he’s there.”

“It’s like I keep telling him. People aren’t sweet like him,” you said as you looked ahead.

“They are. He’s just our version of it,” he said. “I’m willing to share if you are.”

“You can always come knock on his door, Jared. Even if I’m there,” you said. “I’m not stealing him away or anything.”

“Yet you don’t think people are as sweet as him,” he laughed. “You’re funny, Y/L/N.”

He slowed as you saw Jensen and Gen hanging out by the door of an apartment building, Jared leaning over to you.

“He doesn’t always say it but you’ll figure it out soon enough,” said Jared. “He thinks you’re sweet too.”

“Goodnight Jared,” you said as he started to walk again, a smirk crossing his lips. 

“Goodnight Y/N. We’ll have to have you guys over for dinner sometime when you’re not so insanely busy,” said Jared.

“We will take you up on that,” said Jensen, throwing an arm over your shoulders. “Night guys.”

He spun the two of you around before you kept going down the block, Jared laughing in the distance.

“Your friends are nice,” you said.

“They like you,” he said. He dropped his arm and took your hand in his instead, swinging it gently as you headed back towards his car. “I’m glad they like you.”

“They care about you.”

“Yes, they do,” he said. “Still. It’s hard being the tag along sometimes.”

“Jensen. I don’t think either one of them has ever considered you a tag along,” you said. “They want you to be happy.”

“I am,” he said. He kissed you slowly, smiling when he moved back. “Promise.”

“Me too,” you said.

“Anywhere else you’d like to go tonight, pretty girl?” he asked. 

“I am already up way past my bedtime,” you said, leaning your head on his shoulder. “Do you want to sleepover tonight?”

“Yeah,” he said quietly. “You’re very cuddly when you sleep.”

“Sorry,” you said, glad it was dark out and your blush was hidden. He leaned over and brushed his lips against your ear.

“I kinda really like it,” he whispered. You smiled, Jensen spinning you around in a circle until you giggled. “Oh, there’s another thing I like.”

“What else do you like?” you asked.

“Everything,” he said. 

“Ah. That narrows it down,” you said.

“Not a word of a lie,” he said as you let out a small yawn. “Come on. Let’s get you in bed. We have work bright and early.”

“Fuck,” you said, bottling up out of bed the next morning. You slammed your alarm clock, four snoozes in and dashed out of bed, running into the bathroom as Jensen yawned and sat up.

“Morning,” he said with a stretch, watching you run around your bedroom. You slammed the door shut to the bathroom and exited not twenty seconds later in new clothes. “I love a girl that don’t mess around in the morning.”

“I am so late,” you said, grabbing a hair tie from your dresser. You threw it back in a messy pony, Jensen tossing his hat from the floor at you. “Thanks.”

You tugged it on and he rolled out of bed, moving a little slow before he wandered into your bathroom and exited.

“Y/N, it’s like five am,” he yawned.

“I have to review my shots for the day and I have a budget meeting and a stunt review all before eight,” you said, pausing as you grabbed your backpack. “Uh you can totally sleep in. Just lock up after yourself.”

“Nah, it’s cool. I’ll come in early, crash in my trailer for a few,” he said. “Maybe have breakfast with my smokin’ hot director.”

“Does this look smokin’ hot?” you said, pointing down at yourself.

“Well, you’re wearing my hat and my texas t shirt. Yeah, pretty damn hot right now, girl,” he said. You hadn’t even realized you’d grabbed his shirt, just thought it was a big baggy one you used for washing your car or stuff around the house. 

“Oh,” you said, glancing at him, bare chested as he pulled on his jeans. “I didn’t mean to take your shirt.”

“Please do,” he smirked. “I got a sweatshirt in my car. It’s fine.”

“I didn’t remember you taking off your shirt last night,” you said. He nodded and crossed his arms over his chest.

“I got hot under the covers,” he said, glancing away. 

“Sorry,” you said when you kept staring at him.

“Not like you haven’t seen me without a shirt on before,” he said. 

“You’re just...really good looking,” you said, tugging on the bottom of your shirt.

“You can change in front of me if you want. I mean, I can keep it in my pants,” he said.

“It’s not…” you said, Jensen looking you up and down. “People like you aren’t with people like me.”

“I don’t know if it was this ex or what but this twisted sense of self-image or worth or whatever you have going on, you should tell it to shove it cause you are damn gorgeous. You care about people. The world ain’t seeing what you think it is,” he said.

You swallowed and stared at him, Jensen dropping his arms to his sides. You fixed the backpack onto your shoulders before you picked up your phone from your nightstand.

“Y/N,” said Jensen, walking around to your side of the bed, resting a hand on your shoulder.

“I have to relearn those things, Jensen. It’s gonna take time for me to do that,” you said.

“Let me help you do that,” he said.

“Why?” you asked, spinning around.

“Because I care about you,” he said quietly. 

“Yeah but why do you care about me,” you asked. 

“I don’t know. I just do. It kinda scares me to be honest,” he said. 

“Why, cause you’re attracted to a freak?” you asked. He scowled and turned you around, planting a harsh kiss on your lips. His hands cupped your cheeks when he pulled back and you felt like his green eyes were staring right through you.

“Because I don’t know what this is. It feels familiar but it’s not and that’s scary. I hate that you think that way about yourself and everyday I want to go and kick this ex-boyfriend’s ass more and more. He sounds worse than just a bad ex, Y/N. You’re not a freak. You’re someone I care about,” he said. “It doesn’t seem like you care about you all that much which really sucks cause she’s a pretty special girl that deserves it.”

You didn’t know what to say, not with the way he was looking at you. 

Crying when you were already late for the day seemed like the worst possible thing to do but that’s what your body decided for you. Jensen wrapped his arms around your shoulders, kissing your temple and shushing you.

“I’m late,” you sniffled. “I gotta go.”

“Not happening.”

“I’m gonna get in trouble again and I already used up a favor pushing the stunt back before,” you mumbled. “They’re gonna fire me off my own movie.”

“First off, no, they won’t. Second, you need to take a hot minute for yourself and lay back down in bed for another few hours. Filming doesn’t start until eight so we have time. Third, you’re gonna blame this on me,” he said. You tilted your head up, Jensen already shaking his. “I called you freaking out about the pressure and you came over to calm me down. That’s what we say when someone asks.”

“Jensen, no. You can’t do that,” you said. “You’ll get labeled as something you’re not and big gigs could take years to come your way again.”

“Well who gives a fuck about big gigs. I want my girlfriend to be okay right now. That’s what I want,” he said.

“Jensen,” you said.

“No. It’s like I said, you don’t have to tell me a damn thing you don’t want to. But I’m not gonna watch you bully yourself. I won’t. So I’ll help you kick that thing’s ass inside your head that’s making you feel that way. Please. Lay back down, I’ll text your dad, ask him to tell the story that you were reaming me out a new one to get me to keep working and at seven, we’ll wake up and head to work, alright?” 

“You’re not gonna give me a choice,” you said, shutting your eyes.

“You always have a choice. Just make this one right now. Please,” he said.

“Fine but-”

“No buts except you get yours back in that bed for more sleep,” he said. You peeled open your eyes, Jensen with a worried stare looking back. “Tonight after work, we’ll talk and figure out a good way to get through this, alright?”

“I’m not something to fix,” you mumbled, sliding your backpack off.

“I never said you were broken,” he said softly. You looked over at him, giving him a small smile before you slipped under the covers. He left the room for a minute and you kicked off your jeans, Jensen dropping his own when he came back in. He crawled underneath and pulled you into his side, moving the blankets around you. “Relax, honey. It’ll be okay. I promise.”

_____

A/N: Read Part 11 here!