#oh no. but he’s an asshole like me

[cangse-sanren]

the “this character is insufferable” to “this character is literally me” pipeline strikes again

[brainrotcharacters]

makes me giggle to think of X2 Logan meeting dp&w Logan when this is a thing

[jedi-starbird]

"Qui-gon traumatised Obi-wan!!"

Bold of you to assume that Obi-wan Kenobi did not immediately turn around and traumatise him back. Obi-wan does not have daddymaster issues his master has padawan issues.

He returns from MelidaDaan with the power of being 14 (derogatory) and excessive weaponry on his side. Qui-gon's being called by the teachers cause his padawan is teaching the other kids how to make shivs and also unionise. He's sneaking off to the lower levels to hustle sabbac games in order to buy tiny blasters he can keep in his tunics and boots.

When Xantos breaks in to the temple Obi-wan tells him that it's frankly embarassing for him to have had Qui-gon Jinn of all people living rent free in his head for so many years.

[bixels]

Hey, I need some advice. For anyone experienced with kids, how do you deal with young children with hyperactive ADHD. I’m doing well babysitting but I’m afraid of being a pushover and letting these two kids get away with too much, especially when they’re rough-housing.

[feverdreamsandlucidnightmares]

I love perfect court AU stuff if for no other reason than Kevin and Jean are like 6’2” and Neil is 5’3” but he is 100% always more willing to start and finish a fight than them

[sluttybibuck]

imagine one day you’re on your third flight of the day doing your silly little flight attendant job and you’re exhausted, and ready to be home, and you’re smiling and dissociating as your greet passengers as they come on board and suddenly in walks jensen ackles, dean winchester himself, and he smiles and says “thanks” as you hand him a silly little disinfectant wipe. You proceed to hand the basket of wipes to your coworker as you rush to the bathroom to have a full blown panic attack because DEAN FUCKING WINCHESTER is on your flight and you are going to have to talk to him and interact with him and be professional and pretend you aren’t having a meltdown cause you would know those eye crinkles ANYWHERE. Imagine you’re taking dinner orders and you’re repeating to yourself in your head “be profesional, smile and ask for his order, just breathe” and he proceeds to order the cheeseburger and a whiskey neat and your brain short circuits and in your most sarcastic tone out of your mouth comes “yeah sure thing dean” AND THEN YOUR BRAIN EXPLODES CAUSE YOU JUST SAID THAT OUT LOUD TO JENSEN FUCKING ACKLES!!!!! Anyways he laughs and says “my wife says that all the time” then you proceed to die and blackout and work the rest of the flight on autopilot yeah imagine if that happened 😅

[lovehours]

i don’t even fucking care

[simcardiac-arrested]

wait, that elias?

[greasydumbfuck]

i like thinking about how all the versions of frank i know are so gentle with civilians in a certain way. its always "it was my pleasure", "youre safe im not going to hurt you" and "just stay still youre fine" while hes defusing an actual bomb. its always we cant shoot at the strip club because the workers are going to get injured and we cant have that above most else. the punisher is big and scary and kills people without a second thought but if you didnt ask to be there and are just a regular guy wrapped up in situations way beyond you he is also so gentle and its driving me insane

[winepresswrath]

I will laugh so hard if it turns out that John is making a sincere effort at being a decent parent and it's such an awful outcome for Gideon that I feel like it's plausible. He's giving off such man who thinks of himself as a good guy confronted with oops baby vibes.

[laurrelise]

ok so: the umbrella academy except it’s about the hargreeves siblings in 40 years when five is a very, very old man but really in his early 50’s while the rest of the siblings are senior citizens whom five has to take care of against his will

someone please read the tags and yap about this with me. thank you

[nerosdayinanime]

(1)gay fish be upon ye

[acediaedeus]

feel like Grimmjow is a guy you think slept around A LOT, but he actually hasn’t, bc he’s way too dedicated to a sport and beating a ginger guy he’s decided is his rival. he did end up beating him (though only into the mattress).

[latteandjacks]

Susie is way too underrated in aus, she’s usually reduced to a mean girl, stays the same or is underdeveloped

So I just spent the last 3 hours developing her art in the doomed au, she gets a whole section!

Spoiler alert: She needs better friends probably

[lord-squiggletits]

If Megatron was on Earth in Optimus' team during the Galvatron debacle

Optimus: *rips off Galvatron's head*

Soundwave, Arcee, etc.: *gaping at Optimus committing this act of violence*

Megatron: *breathing heavily* "Oh no Optimus that's horrible you need to uh" *clears throat* "I mean you're not supposed to commit war crimes that's" *bites his lower lip* "I mean it's cool that you killed a fascist but you know, ethics and all" *pressing his legs together*

[nakathemoth]

Football! So cool!