#oh no don’t get me started on them as centaurs

[ricco4]

Hob as a Suffolk Punch, I can’t get it out of my head…

Centaur!Dream with a long pretty mane.

I think @gabessquishytum talked abt centaurs at one point and I was like hng yeaaaaaahhhh centaurs SHOULD be a thing. In whatever iteration.

[tojisth3rdwife]

📺BuzzWord Celebrity Game: 10 for 10 with Gifted Curse!📺

Choso: "Hey guys, it’s Chosen here with Toji, Kuna, and Guru! Together, we make up Gifted Curse, and today we’re about to play '10 for 10' with BuzzWord! Let’s get it!" *points to camera*

Rules: Each member will take turns pulling tiny scrolls with questions from this fishbowl. The goal is to answer 10 questions in under 10 minutes. If they fail, they will have to pull a dare from the Dare Box. If they succeed, they get to pull a prize from the Prize Box.

Sukuna steps up to the bowl first.

Toji: "Age before beauty, right?"

Sukuna: *flips Toji off but his finger is blurred out*

Sukuna: “alright…If your band were a superhero team, what would each member's superpower be?”

Toji: "Oh, that’s easy!"

Suguru: *playfully shushes him* "Let’s hear it!"

Sukuna: "Well, Toji’s power would be him talking people to death. He’s good at that. Uhhh… Choso would be telepathic or have the ability to manipulate people's emotions. He’s probably the most intuitive person I know. And Guru?" *turns to Suguru, squinting thoughtfully* “A sharpshooter. Like Deadshot or Hawkeye”

Suguru: “why tho?” *chuckles*

Sukuna: “Because you don’t miss.” *mimes writing with a pen*

All: ooooh

Sukuna: *nods* “I know, I’m good at this!”

Suguru’s turn.

Suguru: “What’s the weirdest thing a fan has ever given you?”

Suguru: “Hmm… I mean, we get a lot of underwear when we’re on stage, but I can’t say that’s strange, right? Isn’t that just a given when you’re in a band?”

Toji: “it is..” *nods*

Choso: it happens

Suguru: “Yeah, so maybe that? I dunno..But I do remember one night at a show in Chicago. We’re in the middle of our set, and out of nowhere, the biggest pair of panties hits me in the face, bounces off, and ends up hanging off the pegs of my guitar. I didn’t notice until the song was over.”

Choso: “I remember that!” *laughs*

Suguru: ”uh huh…I still have em too. The fan signed them and wrote some very nice things. So… at least there wasn’t a bottom-heavy woman or man missing their panties that night. Plus they were clean so..I appreciated that.”

Toji: how you know?

Choso’s turn.

Choso: “What’s your go-to karaoke song when you’re not performing?”

Choso: “Aw man… I don’t really do karaoke.”

Suguru: “Never?”

Choso: “Nah. I didn’t get out much when I was just a regular person. But I do know a song that I’ll just bust out and sing randomly. Toji knows it too.”

Toji: *lifts his brows* “I do?”

Choso: “You do! Because we sing the parts. I don’t know who it’s by, but I know all the words because it played so much in the house I grew up in. It’s crazy.”

Suguru: “Well, what song is it? How does it go?”

Choso: “Aw man, I gotta sing it?”

Toji: “You might as well! You brought it up!”

Choso: “Dang… okay, um…*looks at ceiling as if hes trying to remember* ‘You're contagious… touch me, baby, give me what you got…’”

Toji: *starts grinding* “Seeexy lady, drive me crazy! Drive me wild!”

Choso: *also grinding* “See!? I told you you knew it!”

Suguru: what are yall even dancing to?

Sukuna: “Yall funny” *chuckles*

Toji’s turn.

Toji: “If you could be any mythical creature, which one would you choose and why?” *grunts and laughs to himself*

Toji: “Ooh, I know. What’s the thing where the upper body is a dude, and the bottom half is like a horse?”

Choso: “A centaur?”

Toji: *winks and points at Choso* “Yeah, that one. That’s me!”

Suguru: *smiles with a wrinkled nose* “Why?”

Toji: *looks at the camera and winks again*

Sukuna: *is the first to get it and busts out laughing, playfully shoving Toji’s shoulder* “Ughhh man.”

Toji: “Next question!” *winks for the third time*

Sukuna’s turn again.

Sukuna: “If you could have any animal as a band mascot, what would it be?”

Sukuna: “Toji.”

Choso and Suguru start laughing while Toji just smiles.

Toji: “I’ve just been catching strays all day… it’s cool.”

Sukuna: *laughing* “Because you just make it too easy.” *nudges Toji playfully*

Toji: “Uh-huh.”

Sukuna: “Aw, come on, man, don’t start pouting!”

Toji: “I’m not! It’s cool! Wouldn’t be the first time somebody accused me of being an animal.” *looks at the camera, smooches the air, and winks again*

Suguru: *looking at him incredulously* “What does that even mean?”

Sukuna: “ANYWAY.. Ummm… I think some type of bird would fit us. Like a bird of prey. Maybe a crow or a vulture… some dark *cuss*.”

Suguru: *claps* “Good answer… that’s a good answer..”

The timer goes off.

Toji: “Damn!”

Choso: “Wait, that was 10 minutes?! How?”

Sukuna: “Time flies when you’re talking *cusses*”

Suguru: *snaps his fingers*

Host behind the camera: “Okay, since you guys didn’t answer 10 questions, one of you has to choose a dare from the Dare Box.” *places box on table*

They play rock-paper-scissors, and Choso loses.

Choso: *walks up to the Dare Box with Toji slapping and rubbing his shoulders teasingly*

Toji: lets go champ. Daddy aint raise no punk

Choso: *makes a face and looks at Toji but shrugs off the comment* ok..i can do this. *hesitates*

Sukuna: today would be great

Choso: *puts his hand in the box, mixing the scraps of paper around before picking one*

Suguru rests his chin on Choso’s shoulder to see the dare while Toji leans over his other shoulder to do the same.

Choso: “Eat the hottest chip in the world and close the segment out… wait, hottest chip in the… NO!” *sees the producer handing him the viral spicy chip challenge in the coffin-shaped box*

Toji: *grimaces because its common knowledge that he hates spicy things*

Suguru: ooh ive seen that. That *cussing* is no joke.

Sukuna: *smirking*

Choso: “Oh god..oh god…im scared” *carefully opens the box and sniffs the chip, snorting* “WHEEEEW…”

Toji: “Ugh, I smell it too…HELL naw..ugh…” *swaps places with Sukuna*

Sukuna: man eat the chip!

Suguru: *snickering*

Choso: “Okay!… okay… I can do this. *picks up chip carefully, sniffs it again then gags* Oh *cuss*.. I'm from Tennessee. We eat hot *cuss* all the time. This is nothing..Just one chip.” *shrugs, then pops the chip into his mouth and starts chewing vigorously*

Choso: *pants and chews* “Ugh…”

Toji: *face stuck in a grimace*

Sukuna: *grinning with amusement*

Choso: *fighting for his life, tapping his fist on the table and chewing vigorously*

Choso: Agh! Its so bad..*cusses*

Suguru: “Nah, you’re supposed to be talking, fam— not gasping. Close us out…” *pats his back*

Choso: “Gaaah… ick.” *blinks, teary-eyed* “Okay. *LOUD CUSS*, sorry. Um… Gifted Curse new album dropping December 25th, so go to the link in our Instagram bio to presave it. Ugh, oh god… it gets worse when I talk… uh… show it lots of love. The Journey Documentary will be available to watch on Prime January 6th.. Be sure to like this video and subscribe to BuzzWord so you can see more videos like this. I am Chosen. We are Gifted Curse. I’m about to go drink some milk… good day…”

Choso walks off camera, and can be heard dying in the distance.

Suguru goes after him while Toji gives one last wink/peace combo to the camera before leaving.

Sukuna: *sniffing the hot chip box* “Can I try one too?”

✨Like. Comment. Subscribe✨

<🥀>

Click here to meet the band

[murasaki-cha]

I've wanted to do some incorrect quotes with the ancient powers since I rarely see them (+some Cale and Nelan Barrow for funsies)

-

Super rock: Anyone d-

Crazy kid: Depressed?

Glutton: Drained?

Thief: Dumb?

Cheapskate : Disliked?

Super rock: -done with their work... what is wrong with you people ...

-

Thief: Glutton was banned from the chicken shack, so we had to go out of town to get some.

Glutton: Well, they shouldn’t say “all you can eat” if they don’t mean it.

Thief: Glutton , you ate a chair

-

Super rock: You're a loose cannon, Crazy kid.

Crazy kid: No, I'm not. I'm a cannon maybe, but a loose cannon? Is that what you think of me?

Glutton: I think you play by your own rules.

Thief: No way, they think rules were made to be broken.

Super rock: Those are all attributes of a loose cannon.

Crazy kid: No, I'm just a reckless renegade. Cheapskate is a loose cannon.

Cheapskate : *smashes a chair*

-

Super rock: We need to distract these guys

Crazy kid: Leave it to me

Crazy kid: Centaurs have six limbs and are therefore insects. Discuss.

Glutton, Thief, and Cheapskate : *Immediately begin arguing*

Cale, listening to them in his head: Oh this. I don’t like this. I don't like this at all.

-

Super rock: Favorite horror movie?

Crazy kid : It

Glutton: Saw

Thief: Annabelle

Cheapskate : High School Musical. after watching it I spent all my middle school years terrified that the entire school would start singing something and I’d be the only one who didn’t know the lyrics

-

Super rock: If you bite it and you die, it’s poisonous. If it bites you and you die, it’s venomous.

Nelan Barrow: What if it bites me and it dies!?

Glutton: Then you’re poisonous. Jesus Christ, Nelan, learn to listen.

Thief: What if it bites itself and I die?

Cheapskate: That’s voodoo.

Crazy kid: What if it bites me and someone else dies?

Crazy kid: That’s correlation, not causation.

Thief: What if we bite each other, and neither of us die?

Cheapskate: That’s kinky.

Super rock: Oh my God.

-

Crazy kid: Jail is no fun. I’ll tell you that much.

Thief: Oh, you’ve been?

Crazy kid: Once. In Monopoly.

-

Cheapskate: .. .----. -- / ... --- .-. .-. -.-- [translation: I’M SORRY]

Super Rock: What's that?

Cheapskate: Remorse code.

Super Rock: I'm even angrier now.

-

Crazy kid: I love you guys, you're the best thing that's happened to me.

Cheapskate : We're the best thing that's ever happened to you?

Crazy kid: Yes!

Glutton: I'm starting to feel a little sorry for you.

[flurrys-creativity]

Freakday Night Version

Pairing: Centaur!Choi San (Ateez) x Fem!Naga!Reader; Genre:  fantasy au, supernatural au, smut; Rating: nsfw, 18+, MDNI; Warnings: unprotected sex, sex between different species, built-in bdsm, teasing; Wordcount: 442

Summary: You two were an unlikely pair, yet your desire for each other always tenfolded whenever you two met.

A/N: Welcome monsterfckers, enjoy. I'm seeing myself out :D

“Have you lost your herd?” You asked with a teasing tone, wetting your lips with your split tongue. You glided through the trees and lowered yourself on the back of the centaur, who had stopped upon hearing your voice.

San stomped with his hoof on the ground and shook his head, looking over his shoulder with a pout. “Stop teasing me.”

You cooed at him, snaking your body around until you were eye to eye with him. “You’re just too cute, love.” With that you wrapped your arms around his neck and pulled yourself against his torso. 

San gulped audibly, feeling how your breasts pressed against his bare chest. Yet, he still held you in the embrace. He hid his heating face in the crook of your neck, knowing full well you weren’t done teasing him.

You carded your fingers through his dark locks, slightly scratching his scalp in the process, while your snake-like lower body tightened its hold on San’s lower half. 

He jolted in surprise and raised his head, looking at you with wide eyes, when he felt your tail press against his cock. “What are you doing?” He glanced around in worry someone might stumble upon them in the middle of the forest.

“Oh, love”, you cupped his cheek and closed the distance to kiss him, forcing your split tongue into his mouth. “Don’t be shy now.” A smirk pulled at your lips when San started moaning.

Your own desire increased as well, feeling his large dick hardening under your ministrations. You rubbed your folds against the hard shaft, getting yourself wet and lubricating him. 

Driven by lust, San forgot about his surroundings. His hands greedily roamed around your upper body, playing with your breasts and curves. San lowly cursed his form, wishing he could grab his shaft and simply thrust it into you. Yet he had to endure your teasing and plead with you to finally free him from his pain.

As if you were able to read his mind, you moved your lower body accordingly, pushing yourself on his thick cock. 

Both of you moaned into each other's open mouths, the pleasure from the stretch of your tight hole had both of you panting. 

Your body squeezed around San’s form, your desire nearing its highest point. “Shit, San, you’re so big.”

San grunted something unintelligible, holding you just as tightly with his muscular arms. While he couldn’t actively fuck you the way he desired to, he knew what he had to do once you were done and too weak to hold yourself up.

While you two were an unlikely pair, he’d do anything to stay with you.

© all rights reserved

Taglist: @xavi-in-kpopland @songsoomin @aaa-sia

[luvendiary]

Hiiiiii could i request a Percy x reader? Where reader has been at camp half blood for majority of her life so she’s witnessed everything, maybe she feels very powerless despite being a half blood, so when Chiron tells her she has a prophecy she’s like wtf!?! And maybe it’s about her sacrificing herself to like help win the battle of manhattan? And protect Percy? And maybe when she dies Percy goes absolutely batshit?

Sacrifices

a/n: i'm so sorry for the delay. these past few months have been hectic. I've just finished my IB assignments and I feel so free. to everyone that's sent in requests, I deeply apologize for making you wait so long. with that said, I hope you enjoy this, and as always, let me know what you think. warnings: mention of blood, violence and a bit of dark!percy

When Luke’s sword had pierced your abdomen, it hadn’t hurt.

You were so relieved to have finally found Percy, that the euphoric rush of adrenaline had numbed any pain that the weapon digging into your flesh could have caused.

It wasn’t until you saw the look on Percy’s face, and was somehow made aware of the gasp that Annabeth had let out that you realized something was wrong. You started to feel cold, and dizzy, and it wasn’t until Kronos pulled out the blade, that you finally felt it. With eyes wide, you silently brought your hand up to your stomach, and when you glanced down at it, you saw your calloused skin tinted a deep shade of crimson.

A small gasp left your mouth, a disbelieving one. This couldn’t be it, right? Then again, you suppose this was what you had always wanted: adventure. And with adventure, comes risks. Now you had to pay the price.

You looked up at Percy, and the sound of his sword clattering on the ground echoed in your ears. He was running to you, though his movements seemed slow. Everything was slow, and everything was quiet. Everything but the sound of your own pained breathing that seemed to be amplified. You felt your knees as they gave out on you, and as you fell, your life flew before your eyes.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ───

You were six the first time you realized that older son of Dionysius you had befriended wouldn’t be coming back to camp. He and his group had been ambushed by a group of inferni, and he had sacrificed himself in order to give the others a head start.

Chiron looked at you, as you sat in the first row of the amphitheater, tears running down your cheeks. “We must remember them for who they were, not for their fate. They have reencountered their fallen brothers and sister, and it comes to reason that we will see each other again”, the centaur said. But that didn’t make it any better. You realized then and there that your other friends who Chiron had told you that had ‘moved away’ or ‘decided not to come back to camp’ had probably met the same fate as your friend.

It was Mr. D who had broke the news to you, “Demigods don’t live long kid”, he had said when you came to his office crying that you hadn’t seen his son. “It’s time you knew that, it will save you a lot of pain”. He took out a bottle, and took a big sip from it. His words had not made you feel better, and instead you had run directly to the door, with the intent of getting out, and as far away as possible. Instead, you had bumped into Chiron, who looked down at you with concern, and sudden realization.

“Oh young one…” he lamented.

His deep voice offered you the comfort Mr. D had failed to give you, so you clung to one of his legs as sobs racked your body.

“Couldn’t you be more gentle with her? She’s only six, for the gods sake!”

“Her kind have suffered worse…” Mr. D slurred. “It’s time for her to open her eyes and wake up.”

Wake up.

Wake up.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ───

“Wake up, please. Please wake up, Y/N,” Percy pleaded as he held your body to his.

Your eyes fluttered open, and you saw him looking down at you, his beautiful sea-green eyes were watery. You thought they looked pretty.

Your eyes started to water, though you didn’t know why exactly. Was it because seeing Percy sad made you sad? Or perhaps you were afraid of dying? You didn’t know, but you knew that you wanted to comfort him, so you offered him a small smile and gently raised your hand to wipe his tears.

He let out a sob as he clutched your hand and pressed it to his cheek tenderly.

“Percy…it’s ok…”

He shook his head and shushed you, “No, save your energy. I’m going to get you out of here. You’ll be ok. Everything will be ok.” His voice was desperate, and his eyes reflected it. A storm was brewing inside them.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ───

You were ten the first time another demigod had injured you. It made you feel so weak. You had always been calm, never one to act upon harsh emotions, but this was the first time you realized how much pent-up anger you had been holding onto.

You had been playing capture the flag, and she was on the opposing team. It had been on purpose, you knew how personal these games could get. You understood that. What you didn’t understand, however, was how could she have done this to you.

You pleaded and scurried away from the fifteen-year-old, telling her you didn’t have the flag, and begging for her to leave you alone. She just laughed at you as she showed-off the new blade she had gotten as a spoil from her last quest.

You couldn’t exactly remember what happened, but what you could remember was the pain you felt as the blade cut through the skin on your face. You also remembered the laugh that followed suit, as blood dripped down onto your legs. But you couldn’t remember seeing anything. The blade had cut your eye, and when the other girls realized the severity of the situation, they had fled the scene, leaving you crying and gasping for air alone on the forest floor. It was Annabeth who had found you, and she had called Chiron immediately. By then you had lost consciousness, and when you came to it was by the light stroke of a thumb over your now-healed scar.

Luke smiled down at you. “We’ll be the most bad-ass campers now that we are matching”.

You had smiled then, accepting the little comfort he had offered you. You did suppose that being similar to Luke made you happy, but deep down, the anger that burned inside of you grew. For now, however, you would allow yourself to rest, until you were strong enough to stand again.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ───

You didn’t want to rest. But the thought seemed so alluring. Maybe if you just closed your eyes for a second…

“Open your eyes Y/N”, Percy begged. His voice broke, and it made you want to fix whatever had been broken, but you couldn’t. Not this time.

“We’ll see each other again Perce,” you said, your voice barely above a whisper. “The gods owe us that at least.”

“No. I’ll fix this. There must be someone”.

“It’s not your fault Percy, we can’t stop destiny”.

His eyes widened, he understood now. “No- Please don’t tell me…Y/N/N…”

“Prophecies choose us. And I would have…” you were running out of breath. “I would have chosen it, if it meant helping you.”

Your eyes were getting heavy now, and your body had gone numb by now. It was a peaceful feeling.

“We’ll see each other again,” you whispered. “I promise”.

You heard Percy sob, and you felt his body shake as he held you close. It was nice spending your last moments with him. It was nice being loved.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ───

You had been twelve when you first saw Percy. His encounter with the Minotaur had left him not in the best conditions.

“The monster got you too,” were the first words he had said to you. “But you got a bad-ass scar out of it. I’m just sore. I don’t think that’s fair”.

You rolled your eyes at him, you had been very much tempted to punch him right then and there. “This wasn’t the Minotaur”.

“Then what was it?” he asked, fascination in his eyes. It was amusing how he thought it was all exciting.

“A worse kind of monster,” you replied simply. Not wanting to go into details.

“You’re the coolest girl I know”, he said, and something gave you the impression that he didn’t know a lot of girls.

That year you had your first quest, thanks to fish-boy. It was also the year you got your first ever prophecy. But you wouldn’t come to know that until a few years later when you asked Chiron why he had insisted on you going with Percy and Grover.

You had felt a numbness go through your body then. There was no way to outrun fate. And if fate wanted you to serve as a sacrifice for the world’s savior, then there was no way around it. Your first instinct was to tell Luke, but you had to remind yourself that he had chosen his path a long time ago. He was the cause you were going to have to sacrifice yourself.

You had been thirteen when you realized that maybe Percy wasn’t so bad after all. And fourteen when you told Thalia you might have a crush on him. Fifteen was when you had your first kiss, and now that you were sixteen, you were afraid that you wouldn’t be able to have a second one.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ───

Percy’s blood turned cold as he heard Krono’s grating voice.

“I told her she should’ve joined me! She would have been safe here!” he screamed. “This is your fault Jackson!”

Percy stood up and gripped his sword tightly and lunged at him. His angry groans fueled every attack. Rage and anger ran through his veins, like gasoline, forcing him to move and thrust his sword harder with every attack. His vision became tinted with red, all that he knew was that at some point during their fight, Kronos’ moves had become sloppier, his mortal body confining him, and his tired gasping was like melody to his ears.

The clang of their weapons echoed across the city as they circled each other, searching for an opening. Percy eventually found one, and with a swift and decisive strike, he plunged his sword into Luke’s chest.

The blond boy fell to his knees, clutching his chest as blood seeped through his fingers. Percy looked down at him, his sword still dripping with blood.

“She would’ve told me to go easy on you,” he said, as he glared down at him, hot tears still rolling down his cheeks.

Luke glanced up at him, blood spilling from his parted lips. “I’ll se her soon…” he muttered.

Percy grabbed his hair and forced him to look up at him, “You wont ever get to see her again, understand? I want you to die knowing that you will rot in the deepest pits of Tartarus, while she will be happy without you.” His voice was like acid, burning through everything it touched.

With that, Luke’s eyes rolled to the back of his head and his body went limp.

It was done. The prophecy had ended.

But his quest was far from over. He would have her back, even if it was the last thing he’d ever do.

[henry-fox-biggest-stan]

My favorite parts from the songs of the percy jackson musical

- We’re halfbloods!!! Not gods but demi!!!

- I’M GOOD ENOUGH FOR SOMEONE (six schools in six years six schools in six years six schools in six years)

- The way The Minotaur / The Weirdest Dream is the same tune as Annabeth singing about Percy on In The Same Boat.

- Oh kid you have no idea about this place and your former mentor, I don’t have time to fill you in on the details but look, he’s also a centaur, god!😒

- But, hey! That’s life and life’s not fair!

- “Why, my brother and I arrived here just yesterday! May 1st … 1939! 😊”

- ‘cause you’re the two best friends this screw up ever had

- “Are we ever gonna once have it easy?” “Nop :)”

- Daddy doesn't love me and mommy is a god! Mommy can't protect me and daddy is a god! Mommy is too busy, and daddy is too busy, busy, busy, busy, busy being a god :(

- She can capture your heart I’m gonna ca-ca-ca-capture the flag🎤🎤

- “Grover, you’re a good friend” “aww … dude I’m your only friend.”

- So if you think you are a halfblood, better get headed to the exits now, ‘cause folks will think you're lying, better run and don't start crying 'cause you're monster chow! Or stick around and maybe you'll learn from me 😒 This ain't Odysseus' Odyssey, so hear me out, if you're so compeeelleed, but, nobody listens to me, they never listen, nobody listens to me, they never listen, oh!!!

- My mom raised me all on her lonesome, when I would reach out no one else would be there! Well I want my birthday cards and fishing trips, child support and homework tips 💃💃

- But I don't care where our parents may be, as long as you are here with me. We don't care where our parents may be, as long as you are here with me!! (Nico exploding them with his mind from the distance).

- Luke’s part on The Last Day of Summer.

- And I'll be back next summer, you'll see me again. I'll be back next summer, I'll survive 'til then.

- “My mom doesn't believe in war!” “Oh yeah? Then why does she keep texting my dad?”

- The last verse of Strong sang by both Percy and Sally

+

- The entire song “Pick a Side”

[hydrangeyes]

Unnamed

So if you don't know, Yes this already existed, my old account was deleted (accident but I can tell I won't be getting it back), and am reposting my old x male reader works!

I don't know if I saved all of them but here is one that was saved to my AO3 account.

Edit: So shuffling through my docs It's been brought to my attention that wattpad (who I use as backup) Cut a lot of my fics in half??? anyway I'll be trying to fix that also

-------------------------------------------------------------------

Edit Nov.8.2023:

*Looks everywhere but at you* it..it was going to be pwp.

Botw link x male lynel hybrid

Warning: kinda slow burn, romance is there????, it is, courting, violence, slight misunderstanding, belly bulge, big dick, cum play, ass eating, blow jobs, pet play, overstimulation, nipple play/light torture, somniphilia, crying, light angst, public sex, voyeurism, switch link, switch oc, updated as I write lmao, this is pretty slice of life tbh, just with porn, ruts/heats, This is some wild shit, Wow google search please don’t 

Are you telling me lynel's exist and someone hasn't once thought "maybe 👀 these centaur babes can get it?" Cause I honestly don't believe that.

================================================

Chapter 1: I love Chabi, I feel like she would be a gremlin.

Note: Puuuuuure self-indulgence. Like listen my brain went brrrrrrrrr, this is for fellow monsterfuckers

Traveling after fighting Ganon all at once was rather...fun. Maybe it’s because he went straight to the source of evil and somehow lucked out. And now don’t have a sense of urgency to get to that end goal. The collecting of his memories happened right after as well and by then the princess herself wanted to truly rest up before traveling with him.

He didn’t like the thought of leaving her behind, but he felt a little more at ease that at least she would be staying with Purah for the time being.

Link shivers as he tugs up the fur around his neck. Snowfield was feeling extra chilly for some reason.  He moves a little faster, shuffling through his pockets as he ate one of his emergency peppers. Imagine his relief when he sees the stable just up ahead with a few of the tiny town’s stacked together houses.

“Ah, link!” A voice calls to him once he steps in. The tavern/horse stable wasn’t too packed thank goodness but there was a familiar face. Chabi grins waving at the surprised Hylian.

Chabi and he became pretty good friends after the handful of times Link has saved her as well as traded monster parts with her. She mainly stuck to warmer places and just barely the edges of goron city. It seemed she was acting as an in-between for Kilton and fellow travelers. But being so far from the usual land she would circle in?

“Chabi? A bit far from the base aren’t you?” Link said softly with gesturing to the whole thick woven sweater she was in. Giggling chabi smirks puffing out her chest. “Call me the official Monster tradesman! I’ve started traveling a little further out for those rare materials. Kilton even gifted me with some weapons that’ll protect me better!” she starts up, gesturing him to join her at the little table she was sitting at.

“And so I thought why not start the one place I know the boss doesn’t care to visit. He doesn’t like the cold, he says it makes his feet clammy.”

Link holds back the many questions that pop up in his head about that. Best to store that away with the other questions he has under Kilton’s name. “I..see. So Snowfield was your first stop or?”

“Hm? OH no hehe. Rather some interesting rumors brought me here.”

Feeling like this will be a long one Link waves over a barmaid to buy some spicy curry and hopefully a few fish skewers. Maybe buy a bed for the night as well, just in case, the others get taken.

---------------------------------------------------------

“-And so there I was! Hearing about a lynel wandering between the mountains and near the ruins! And oh I just had to see for myself, maybe ask for a few loose fangs or toenails you know?”

“No. I don’t know.” Link muttered into his drink. It felt like hours since she started this story, before finally getting to the point. He learned way more about how to skin mokoblin guts than he wished. Anyway- “I doubt they would give you a fang but what’s this about it traveling to the ruins?” As far as Link knew most lynels up here were feral or didn’t live anywhere close to the ruins.

“Well, which ruins now that I think about it…” Link asks as Chabi finishes up the last fish skewer. 

“Mhh, Well I say ruins but really it’s the forgotten temple.”

Now that got his attention. What could a lynel want in that guardian-ridden place??? Link frowns leaning back o think about it. That temple of any was the most dangerous and well...Link couldn’t help but feel a little responsible since he didn’t exactly break down the guardians still in there. He was still getting the hang of dealing with those, much less the mobile ones.

The thought of those stalkers since a bone-deep type over shiver. “Why don’t you let me check out if the rumors are true or not. I know you can take on a hoard of bokoblins but even when they’re going easy on you lynels are tough, and rather approach you than vice versa.”

Chabi yawns pouting a bit, sleep probably just now getting to her. “Mm, I suppose. If you can leave them a welcoming message to trade with me please?” she half pleads and half demands. Link nods getting up for a stretch, absolutely happy that she didn’t stop him. He was ready to collapse on the nearest free bed. “I will, soon as I get up I’ll head on over okay?

“Link if I wasn’t so devoted to the boss, I could just kiss you right now!”

“Please don’t.”

------------------------------------------------------

End Notes:

Basing a lot of this on my 3 playthroughs of botw. And I played them chaotically, as well as just overall making some things up. I kinda want there to be a lot more people in the botw world, like stables have small villages of their own (tarrey town size at least).

 I have a whole dnd esc Au for this where most monsters have their own tribes etc. but lynels, Lizalfos, and maybe wizzrobes interact with humanoids and trade with them. Except for maybe wizzrobes, I feel like they’re more steal your shit and bargain it back, type people.

This issss planned to be very long like, there’s a whole courting arc I have in mind, If you’re here just for the porn, it’ll be marked.

Anyway, this will all probably be unedited and sloppy. It’s for fun and the chapter lengths will probably vary as well. Idk why but I like the thought of the monster appreciators hooking us best friends (or partners) and link is just there, rethinking his life choices. 

But again real talk I right this whenever my mind gets staticy so please excuse any grammar issues, the many run-on sentences, etc etc 👍

--------------------------------------------

Chapter 2: O-oh someone fucked a Lynel.

If there's one thing he loved about the snowy areas it was waking up to fresh snow in the morning or nights.

Breathing in that crisp air and starting his journey. Link rubs his cold cheeks, face a bit flushed.

But Chiba woke him up first thing and he will admit he was also wondering about this traveling lynel. The locals (at least the ones up) all mentioned how the lynel kept to themselves, and only came to buy directly from the farmer.

Makes him wonder if the lynel was checking out the area to maybe start up a new home. Shaking his head Link focused on climbing the hill and not sliding off. 

[thetravelerwrites]

Growing Pains (Centaur Dads)

Rating: General Audiences Additional Tags: Adoption, Gay Dads, Exophilia, Centaurs, Kids Series: Part 17 of Shelter Forest: The Towns Words: 2,068

When their son comes home from school upset, two centaurs must figure out how to have The Big Talk about what adoption means. Please reblog and leave feedback!

Rollie stalked through the front door with his head down and dropped his writing board by the hall tree. Without bothering to say anything to his fathers, he immediately went to his room, not quite slamming the door but certainly shutting it with more force than normal. Beyram, a Rahvan centaur, and Alphons, a Haflinger centaur, looked at each other in concern and made their way through the open layout of their cottage, knocking on their son’s door. Rollie was a bright, happy eight-year-old child, so for him to be silent and brooding was wildly out of character.

“Rollie?” Beyram asked. “Everything alright?”

Rollie didn’t answer. 

“We’re coming in, alright, son?” 

Again, Rollie said nothing, and his fathers eased the door open. Rollie sat on his bed with his arms crossed sullenly, a tear rolling down his face. 

“Hey, buddy,” Alphons said gently, patting his back softly. Both centaurs folded their legs carefully and knelt next to the bed. “What’s going on? What’s got you so upset?” 

“The kids at school make fun of me,” He said. “They said it’s weird that you both have four legs and that I only have two. They said it means that I’m not your real son.” 

Alphons and Beyram looked at each other and winced. They knew that they’d have to have this conversation eventually, but they hadn’t known it would be so soon. Rollie had only just started going to the local school, and while he enjoyed it at first, he slowly seemed to become more introverted. Now they knew why. 

“Listen, buddy,” Alphons said. “You are our real son. Just because we adopted you doesn’t mean you’re not our son.”

“Adopted?” Rollie asked, looking up in confusion. “What does that mean?” 

“Well,” Beyram began reluctantly. “Da and Pa can’t have babies like other families can–”

“Why not?” Rollie asked guilelessly.

“Oh, god, we don’t need to have this conversation too, do we?” Alphons said in an undertone. Beyram ignored the question.

“Since we can’t have babies the normal way, we decided to look as hard as we could for a child that we could love, and we found you and brought you home with us. That’s what adoption is. It doesn’t matter that we’re centaurs and you’re human, you’re still our son. You’re someone we picked out specially. We chose to love you and be your fathers.”

Rollie frowned, still looking confused. “I don’t understand.” 

Alphons and Beyram looked at each other, at a loss for what to say. 

“So… I am different from you? You’re not really my parents?” 

“No, that’s not it at all!” Alphons insisted. “Of course you’re our son! You can’t ever doubt that! You’re our son and we love you!”

“Listen, son,” Beyram said. “Let’s take a trip tomorrow. We’ll show you what we mean. Alright?” 

“A trip to where?” 

“The place we found you. It’s called an orphanage. It’s where you became our son. Would you like to go see it?”

After a moment of contemplation, Rollie nodded. “Alright.”

The next day, Rollie sat on Alphons’s back and the three of them set off for Coleville, where there was an orphanage that was run by a lizardman named Cetzu and his human wife. It took about a week for them to get there since they traveled slowly and took frequent breaks. They wanted Rollie to have fun on the trip as much as he could, so they went camping and mushroom picking and frog hunting and lots of little activities that Rollie loved to do. He seemed in much better spirits during the journey. 

They reached Coleville and went straight to the orphanage, where Cetzu was outside, sweeping the front steps. Alphons and Beyram had sent a letter to Cetzu in advance, so he had been expecting them.

“This is where you lived before we adopted you,” Beyram said as they came up to the building. “You were only a baby back then, so it’s no surprise you don’t remember.” 

“I lived here?” Rollie asked. “Why?” 

Alphons nudged Beyram, and he fell silent. As far as they were aware, Rollie had been left on the doorstep of the orphanage when he was only a few days old. Thankfully, the orphanage regularly paid mothers in the town to be wet nurses for the infants, otherwise Rollie would have starved. They weren’t sure how to break it to Rollie that he had been abandoned, and had carefully avoided answering direct questions. They knew they’d have to explain it at some point in the trip, but they were dreading that conversation. 

“Welcome!” Cetzu said, rushing forward to shake hands with the centaurs as they arrived. Cetzu was quite tall, but the centaurs dwarfed him by a wide margin. “I’ve been waiting for you. My goodness, is this Rollie? He’s gotten so big!” 

Rollie wasn’t normally shy with strangers, but the nature of the trip had caused a bit of trepidation in him, and he hid a little behind Beyram’s foreleg. 

“Hi,” He said in a small voice. 

“Hello, there,” Cetzu said brightly. “I’m not surprised you don’t remember me, you were barely a year when you left us.” 

“Da and Pa said I lived here when I was a baby,” Rollie said. 

“That’s right,” Cetzu said. “My wife and I looked after you until your fathers came to get you. Would you like to come in and meet the other kids?” 

Rollie nodded and stepped forward toward the garden where about ten other children were playing. He only needed a small amount of encouragement before he was darting around with them, playing chase. 

“We really need your help, Cetzu,” Alphons said a little desperately. “We’ve been hedging the question, but we can’t avoid it forever. How are we supposed to explain that he was abandoned?” 

“Well, we don’t know that he was abandoned, necessarily,” Cetzu said. “It’s entirely possible that his parents died or met with an unfortunate fate. It does happen.” 

“You know what I mean, though,” Alphons insisted. “He keeps asking why. We don’t know how to explain it to him without hurting him.” 

“Well…” Cetzu said sadly. “There may be no avoiding a little bit of upset, I’m afraid. But your job as his parents is to reassure him that he’s loved. Regardless of why his birth parents gave him up, you chose him and you love him. Just make sure he knows that. That’s really the most important thing.” 

“Yes…” Beyram said, watching his son play and laugh. 

“Maybe ask the other kids to help you,” Cetzu suggested. “You’d be surprised how well kids grasp these concepts, regardless of their age. They’re all dying to get adopted. If Rollie hears how excited the kids are to find their own parents, he may understand how special it is to be chosen.” 

“That’s a good idea,” Alphons. “It’s is alright to talk to the children?” 

“Of course,” Cetzu said, stepping aside and waving to the children. “Go right ahead, I’m sure they’d be happy to.” 

Beyram and Alphons stepped into the garden fence. The kids stopped their game and gathered around the centaurs, their faces curious. It wasn’t surprising: centaurs were unusual here on this continent. Beyram and Alphons only knew of two or three others in the region, and they very rarely crossed paths with them. 

“Circle time, kids!” Cetzu said, motioning for them to sit. “Leave room for our new friends.” 

The kids circled up and sat expectantly. Cetzu sat with them and instructed Beyram, Alphons, and Rollie to sit alongside them.

“So,” Cetzu said. “Our new friend Rollie just found out he is adopted. What do you all think about that?” 

Every one of the children raised their hands. 

“Coby?” Cetzu said, pointing at a young boy of perhaps seven. 

“I think it’s great!” Coby said. “I can’t wait to get adopted!” 

“Why?” Rollie asked him. 

“Because I want to have a family, like all my friends from town. I want to have parents and siblings who love me.” 

“How do you know they’ll love you?” 

“Why would they adopt me if they didn’t want to love me?” Coby asked, his head tilted. 

Rollie looked introspective. “How come you don’t have parents? What happened to them?” 

“Nothing,” Coby said matter-of-factly. “They just didn’t want me.” 

“Why?”

“Rollie, that’s rude,” Beyram said in an undertone, but Cetzu shook his head. 

“It’s alright,” Cetzu said, turning back to Coby. “Do you want to answer that question?” 

Coby shrugged. “I don’t know why they didn’t want me,” Coby said. “But that’s not my fault. There’s nothing wrong with me. I’m great.” 

The other kids laughed, and Rollie cracked a smile. He still seemed a little confused, but he kept asking the others questions. The others had similar things to say, that they were abandoned or that their parents died or couldn’t take care of them for whatever reason. Beyram and Alphons weren’t sure if Rollie really understood, but they were happy he seemed engaged in the conversation. 

Rollie asked them if they really wanted to be adopted, and they all said yes. When asked why, the answer was the same: They wanted what every other kid in town had. They wanted a family. They wanted to be loved.

Rollie asked the other kids questions for hours, until the sun began to set. Cetzu invited the family to have dinner there, and they accepted. After dinner, Beyram and Alphons left a large donation to the orphanage and left for the local inn. It had a stable room that was rented out to four legged folks, and Beyram booked it. 

As they were settling down for the evening and laying out Rollie’s bedroll, Alphons asked, “Hey, buddy, how are you feeling?” 

“I’m alright,” Rollie said, getting under the blanket. 

“Are you sure?” 

“Yeah,” He said, looking up at his fathers, who were kneeling next to him. “I get it now. I’m special. That’s why you chose me, right?” 

Beyram smiled. “That’s right. You see,” He said, scratching his neck. “When Da and I got married and began living together, we always knew we wanted to have children, but we knew we couldn’t go about it the normal way. We always knew we needed to go about it differently than other families, so we knew we were going to adopt. It took us time to get the house set up the way we wanted and get everything prepared, but as soon as we did, we started looking for our baby.” 

Alphons nodded. “It was a while and a lot of trial and error, and we were worried we may not find the right one, but then we saw you, and it just clicked. We realized you were our child, and you always had been. It just took us a while to find you.” 

Rollie looked pensive. “What happened to my other parents?” 

Alphons sighed, apprehensive. “We don’t know, son. All we know is that Mr. Cetzu and his wife found you outside on the doorstep. There could be any reason why, but we don’t really know.” 

“Hmm…” Rollie hummed. “It doesn’t matter.” 

“Are you sure?” 

“Yeah,” Rollie said, standing up out of his bed and throwing his arms around Alphons’s neck for a hug, and then did the same to Beyram. “You’re my parents now. And you love me, right?” 

“Of course,” Alphons said, ruffling Rollie’s hair. “We love you very, very much.” 

“Absolutely,” Beyram said. “We’ve loved you since the day we laid eyes on you, and we always will. You’re our son.” 

“Then it’s fine,” Rollie said, getting back into his bedroll. “Goodnight, Da. Goodnight, Pa.”

“Goodnight, son,” Beyram said. 

“Goodnight, buddy,” Alphons replied. 

Rollie wanted to stay another few days before returning, so it was almost another two weeks before they made it back home. Beyram and Alphons were both worried that Rollie wouldn’t want to return to school, but contrary to their expectations, he wanted to return right away. 

When he returned home from school the first day back, he gave his fathers a hug around the middle and sat at his little table for a snack.

“How was school, son?” Beyram asked. “Did the kids pick on you again?” 

“Yeah, but I didn’t care,” He said nonchalantly. “They didn’t get chosen, so they don’t know anything.” 

Beyram and Alphons smiled, kissed the top of Rollie’s head, and gave him his apple slices.

Since my work is no longer searchable, please do me a favor and reblog this story if you enjoyed it. Help me reach a wider audience! To help me continue creating, please consider buying me a Kofi, becoming a Patron, or donating directly to my PayPal!

Thanks for reading!

My Masterlist

The Exophilia Creator’s Masterlist

[waitingandwishing]

The Clay Girl - Epilogue (For now)

(Cross posted on Wattpad and AO3)

Prev - Next Chapter

Odyssa sighed, packing up her orange shirt into her suitcase. This had been the first time she’d left camp. She hadn’t thought leaving would be on her agenda this year, but she had things she needed to do.

“Miss Creston, are you ready to go?” Chiron knocked on her cabin door. She folded the last of her clothes, turning to the centaur with a smile.

“Yes, Chiron,” she said, taking one last glance at the leather bag propped on her back. If she was going to leave camp, she’d have to leave behind her sister's things too.

“You are not going to be taking your sister's things with you?” Chiron asked with confusion written on his face.

“They’re a sort of waiting present for me when I come back for the summer.” Odyssa gazed fondly at the crushed music box.

“Hey, hey, hey.” Mr. D entered the cabin, “Ophelia c’mon it’s time to get out!”

She didn’t bother correcting him, it wasn’t like he’d listen anyway. “Alright, Mr. D,” Odyssa said, brushing past the two adults.

“Odyssa!” A familiar voice called out. Odyssa chuckled, rolling her eyes slightly.

“Hey, Will!” Odyssa smiled as Will came up to her.

“You’re really leaving?” He asked and Odyssa nodded.

“Of course I am, I’ve got to do more than just sit around here at camp.” She said and Will huffed.

“And you’ll come back next year?” The blonde asked and Odyssa ruffled his hair a bit with a fond smile.

“Of course, that’s a promise I’ll always keep.” The child of Artemis waved goodbye to her cousin. “I’ll see you, alright?! Make sure the Apollo kids don’t go around touching my stuff!”

“Will do!” Will saluted her as she made her way to the edge of camp once again. She squinted slightly, spotting two figures conversing near the pine tree.

“Hey.” Odyssa smiled as she came up to the two.

“How’re you feeling?” Annabeth asked and Odyssa shrugged.

“Much better, ambrosia’s a life-saver, y’know?” She smiled.

“You’re gonna remember to write to me, right?” Percy asked and Odyssa nodded.

“Of course, I’ll send you some gifts on the way.” She grinned before turning to Annabeth, “And I’ll be writing to you and Grover too so you guys better answer.”

“Wouldn’t miss it for the world.” Annabeth smiled.

“Guys! Guys!” Grover’s voice called out to the three of them, he scrambled towards them with the brightest smile Odyssa’d ever seen him wearing.

“You got it?” Percy asked and Grover nodded, “Where is it?”

Grover moved the side of his jacket to reveal a green peony pinned on his chest. Odyssa clapped softly at the sight. “Is that your Searcher's license?” Percy asked.

“Yeah. Officially authorized to begin the quest for Pan!” Grover exclaimed with excitement. Odyssa chuckled at his happy state.

“Where are you gonna start?” Annabeth asked.

“Well, it seems like every inch of the natural world's been checked, noted, and footnoted. Then checked again. The Council's theory is that Pan is always on the move, and it's all about timing.” Grover rambled, “But… No one's ever bothered to check the seas.”

“I know some people in management out there if you ever need some help…”

“I'll find you.” Grover smiled at Percy before turning to Odyssa, “Oh, yeah! Also, one of the Hephaestus kids said they’d fix the music box for you! It was really bashed up when I found it but it’ll probably be fixed when you get back.”

“Thanks, Grover.” Odyssa smiled.

“You mean you’re not taking it with you?” Percy asked and Odyssa shrugged.

“I’ve been stuck in the past for a long time.” She said with a far-off look in her eyes, “I figured it was best to take a break from all that stuff.”

“You’re a half-blood, you’ll never get a break,” Annabeth smirked and Odyssa smiled.

“Alright, well, as best as I can get.” She said.

A moment of silence passed through the four of them, they all exchanged glances at each other before Percy spoke. “Listen… Let's make a pact. Right now. No matter what happens, we meet back here next year.” He turned to Odyssa with a pointed look, “All of us. Right here. Deal?”

They all nodded before exchanging a big group hug with each other, Odyssa sighing as she was wrapped into a warm embrace. “You guys are the best.”

_____________________________________________________

“And then, I volunteered here.” Odyssa smiled, closing the small journal she wrote in with a snap, “Are you ready to go to sleep now, Trinity?”

Trinity nodded though she probably didn’t mean it before turning to one of the other teachers, “Why can’t Dessa tell us stories at storytime ALLLLLL the time?”

“Because, Trinity, Odyssa is very busy during naptime. She has to clean the kitchen and make your bed because you keep forgetting to.” A kind woman, Mrs. Brebs, explained with a smile, “Now, go back to bed. You’re gonna need it for tomorrow.”

“But I don’t wanna!” Trinity whined before turning to Odyssa, “Tell me about the one with the pine tree! You told me you were gonna tell me!”

“You have to go to bed, it’s getting late.” Odyssa ran her hand through the girl’s hair, “Maybe tomorrow, alright?”

The little girl smiled a toothy grin, a gap in between her two front teeth before bounding up the stairs to bed. “She enjoys your stories a lot, Odyssa.” The teacher said.

Odyssa nodded, eyeing the teacher. “Well, of course she does. Stories that feel real usually always are.” She said with a small smile, looking out the window as thunder crackled against the bleak sky. “I’m going to bed, Miss. See you in the morning.”

“Of course, goodnight, Odyssa.” Mrs. Brebs smiled kindly, “Oh, by the way dear, some letters came in the mail for you just last night.”

“Thank you for informing me, Mrs. Brebs.” Odyssa gave her a farewell and quietly entered her room, closing the door behind her.

She sat in the nook placed in her room, curling up with a small light next to her. The room had tall windows with sheer curtains, allowing a faint blue light to filter in. She tore open the letters with a smile as she saw what they had written.

Dear, Odyssa.

I surprisingly remembered to write to you today! My dad took me around New York and we took a tour inside the Empire State Building. It was nice, but I’m assuming you know that since you and Percy went there just a few days ago.

Thanks for writing back to me earlier, sorry I haven’t been able to respond. I saw a dog that reminded me of Cerberus, it was cute although I don’t think I’ll be able to look at them the same again.

Anyways, how’s Trinity?

From, Annabeth.

To, Odyssa.

Hi, Odyssa! My quest to find Pan has been going a little slow but I’m optimistic about him traveling the seas! After all, what’s more polluted than the ocean?

I’m hopeful that I’ll find him before anyone else does. If I do, they’ll mention my name for generations to come! I almost lost my Searcher's License yesterday, a goat tried to eat it which was weird because why was a goat even by me?

Thanks for checking in, Grover.

Hey there, Odyssa. (I think I spelled that right)

I just wnted to reach out and say hi. Sorry if this gets a bit mixed up, but I'm trying my best here.

Anyway, hope youre doing well and that things are going okay on your end. I’ve been thinking of reaching out but then i get distracted or forget what i was gonna say.

My mom wants to talk to you and says that you sound really nice and that she’d like you to come over during the school year. Sound like something you mite like? Anyway, i just wanted to check in. Let me know how things are going with you i guess.

Take care, Percy Jackson (The coolest person youll ever meet)

Odyssa chuckled at the letter; it was thoughtful of them to remember to write back. Most people would have forgotten. She grabbed a piece of paper and held a small pen in her hand as she wrote:

Dear, Kelp Head

It’s a bit late to write to you now, isn’t it? I’ve been trying to spell this correctly so you can read it properly and it’s taken me about a month and the dyslexia doesn’t help much either.

Thanks for checking up on me, I’m actually doing really good right now. There’s this little girl named Trinity where I’m living currently and I tell her snippets about our adventures sometimes. She says that she wants to meet you one day. Hopefully, maybe I could take her to camp.

That’d never happen, but a girl can dream, right? Anyway, I’m getting off-topic. I hope you’re glad that I’m writing to you because this is important.

I’ve already written to Annabeth and Grover and yes, I know how that sounds, but it’s been hard to write to you specifically because… You’re one of my best friends, even though I just met you.

You’re a great person, not because of who your parents are but because of who you are. You’re just Percy to me, that random kid that got pushed into the lake by Annabeth.

Just know that I’m always going to be on your side (Unless it’s Annabeth, then we might have some problems) and that I’ll always be your friend. I’ll always be there for you and so will everyone else. Just remember Perce, you’re not alone. You’ve got people who will fight for you.

Wow, I’m such a sap, aren’t I? I must miss camp already.

Anyway, it’s nice to know that there are people out there waiting for me. I’ve never had that before so thank you. Tell your mom I said hi and that I might take up your offer to visit you in NYC.

Love, Odyssa Creston (The coolest girl you’ll ever meet AKA The Clay Girl)

[beeshoesometimesdraws]

(centaur au)

Will Eclipse get revenge on Lunar for zapping him? If yes, how?

Also do you have any random facts/hcs about any of the centaurs?

I'm sooo interested in this AU that you can't even imagine

Yes, Eclipse will definitely be getting revenge on Lunar later (it will most likely involve snakes - I don’t think Lunar in canon is afraid of snakes, at least not that I recall, though centaur Lunar is, I kinda imagine it how Toothless and the other dragons in httyd are scared of eels)

Oh yeah I have LOTS of random fun facts/headcanons for this au >:)

Starting off with gender/sexuality headcanons :

Lunar is trans and uses they/he pronouns, pan

Earth is panromantic demisexual and uses she/they

Solar is pan and uses he/they

Sun uses any pronouns (he/she/they), bi

Moon is aroace, uses he/him

Eclipse is demiromantic pansexual and agender, uses he/him

(BM twins) Scarlet (twin 1) - genderfluid, pan | Whiskey (twin 2) - nonbinary (masc leaning), uses they/he and is biromantic grey-ace

Ruin is unlabeled, def queer tho, and uses they/them

KC is bisexual and uses he/him

Now onto other random facts/headcanons :

The BM twins in this au are obligate carnivores (most centaurs are omnivores like humans—in my headcanon anyway- so the twins are an abnormality)

The twins are separate in this au and that is how they have always been though they still have a very close connection to each other

The nick/tear in Solar’s ear is from a tracker that he ripped out of his ear sometime before meeting the others

Solar has a bit of a southern accent in this au (I may do voice claim stuff tho still unsure)

Instead of coming from his time in space like in canon, Lunar’s star powers were just something he was born with that lay dormant in him until later on (the astrals of course knew he had these powers the whole time but didn’t appear until they started to manifest)

KC is the tallest as well as the oldest in this au (with Eclipse being a close second in height) and Lunar is the shortest (and the only one based off a pony)

KC’s right ear is permanently flattened due to an injury from years ago (you can see this on his ref sheet)

All of them display horselike behaviors (because as many already know I LOVE characters with physical animal traits that also have behavioral traits)

These behaviors include :

vocal (snorting, squealing, whinnying, nickering, etc)

stomping hooves when annoyed/upset or sending an alarm to others

ear emotes (laid flat - angry, swiveling rapidly - anxious/nervous, pricked - alert/interested, etc)

when excited or playing they may nip and bump each other and/or chase each other around

charging/false charging (Eclipse is well known for doing this both to other centaurs and people)

They may be centaurs but they are still of course half horse and have prey responses/behavior, especially when it comes to things that could be a threat to them (wild cats, wolves, other large predators, snakes, etc)

some have stronger reactions to this prey response than others (though again the twins are the odd ones out and have little fear for other predators with them being more like a predator themselves)

during the fall and winter their coats get thicker and fluffier and in the spring and summer they thin back out

They all live with their own little “herds” —Moon and Sun’s herd (them, Lunar, Earth, Solar, eventually Eclipse), KC’s herd (KC + the twins)—Ruin’s the odd one out in this as they don’t belong to either herd

(There’s other behaviors they do but these are some of the most common/notable)

That’s all the random little facts/headcanons I have for now, I don’t want this post getting too long lol

Thank you for giving me an excuse to infodump :D

[a-chaotically-small-lunta]

Oh boy dream time!

It was short but I have to remember it. I was a centaur next to two others. We were helping to train a young fighter but holding weapons and attacks as they jumped past. The fighter basically had to jump past all the weapons while dodging them or parrying them. They wore basic armor and had blue hair, they honestly looked very similar to Lapis from Steven universe but with a few details of difference. Anyway, After a few attempts they get upset and yell at the other two centaurs that this is too easy and they aren’t making it hard enough. Then they pause at me and ask why I’m different, why I’ve been doing more than the other two. At this point I’ve been stuck in a dream loop so I sigh and say, “cause this is a dream that I’m having” as I say this I’ve morphed into my actual body. The fighter looks at me and drops their weapon “so I’m not real…none of this matters. You’ll wake up and I’ll never have existed?” They break down and the dream starts to fall apart. I quickly hold them close and say “it’s alright. I know this is scary and I’m sorry” they look at me and ask “please don’t forget me, please I don’t want to disappear” I hug them tightly and say I won’t forget them and I promise they’ll be remembered. Then I woke up.

[kawaiichibiart]

Felix: Why are Adrien and Luka sitting with their backs to each other?

Bridgette: They had a fight.

Felix: Then why are they holding hands?

Bridgette: They get sad when they fight.

˳✧༚ ☆ ༚✧˳･͛♡̷̷̷･͛˳✧༚ ☆ ༚✧˳

*Adrien/Ren's helping Luka out after they get injured, while the others are watching*

Felix: How does Luka look?

Bridgette: A little better than you, actually.

˳✧༚ ☆ ༚✧˳･͛♡̷̷̷･͛˳✧༚ ☆ ༚✧˳

Adrien/Ren: You lying, cheating, piece of shit!

Luka: Oh yeah? You’re the idiot who thinks you can get away with everything you do. WELCOME TO THE REAL WORLD

Adrien/Ren: I’m leaving you, and I’M TAKING FELIX WITH ME

Bridgette, picking up the monopoly board: I think we’re gonna stop playing now.

˳✧༚ ☆ ༚✧˳･͛♡̷̷̷･͛˳✧༚ ☆ ༚✧˳

Adrien/Ren, about Luka: Apparently we’re getting someone new in the group.

Felix: Are we stealing them?

Bridgette: New or used?

Adrien/Ren: Wonderful responses, both of you.

˳✧༚ ☆ ༚✧˳･͛♡̷̷̷･͛˳✧༚ ☆ ༚✧˳

Adrien/Ren: We need to distract these guys

Luka: Leave it to me

Luka: Centaurs have six limbs and are therefore insects. Discuss.

Felix, Bridgette, and Plagg: *Immediately begin arguing*

Duusuu, watching in horror: Oh this. I don’t like this. I don't like this at all.

˳✧༚ ☆ ༚✧˳･͛♡̷̷̷･͛˳✧༚ ☆ ༚✧˳

Adrien/Ren, walking into their house: Hello, people who do not live here.

Luka: Hey.

Felix: Hi.

Bridgette: Hello.

Plagg: Hey!

Adrien/Ren: I gave you the key to my place for emergencies only!

Duusuu: We were out of Doritos.

˳✧༚ ☆ ༚✧˳･͛♡̷̷̷･͛˳✧༚ ☆ ༚✧˳

Adrien/Ren: Just be yourself.

Luka: 'Be myself'? Adrien, I have one day to win Felix over. How long did it take before you guys started liking me?

Bridgette: Couple weeks.

Plagg: Six months.

Duusuu: Jury’s still out.

Luka: See, Adrien/Ren?

Luka: 'Be myself'. What kind of garbage advice is that?

[missterious-figure]

Heeeeey, I gots a centaur OC ready for Centaur AU! His name is Josiah, an albino deer centaur who mostly stays in the shade, doesn’t really like the sun. His hair is so long, he has a pretty hard time combing it and getting it out of his hair. He is rather big and kind of intimidating at first, especially if he is in the forest and is dark and someone just sees this light ass centaur with glowing yellow eyes. But in reality, he is a softie who just likes to chill and have his hair played with and braided and stuff. His legs are pretty strong but the skin is pretty delicate so he often has bandages wrapped around them due to injuries he gets every day.

He would not wander far from the herd a lot but when he does, he ends up getting lost pretty badly and cries until someone finds him. He is most likely to get along best with Y/N and Sun since they the most friendly of the herd in his opinion and is pretty close to the fawns and takes care of them when he can. He respects Eclipse and Moon, though he doesn’t talk to them much unless he gets lost and they have to find him.

“Oh no, don’t tell me I got lost again…”

(Poor boi’s sense of direction is the worst!)

The white deer centaur looked around the a the tall trees. How did he get lost again? The grassland is where the herd was, and he had only wandered in to the forest for a second. Why, oh why, does this always happen to him?

He then hears a loud bellow sound off in the distance. Eclipse! He's signaling to the group that they have an hour or so left to finish eating before they move on. Uh oh!! Not good. Josiah needed to get back. And soon. He started heading in the direction of the bellow.

(I really like your OC! He's pretty cool looking! And I love his story, too!)

[analiavs]

Remy Free Use

Cw/tags: free use, dog boys, centaurs, pig boy, degradation, minor mindbreak

Words: 3355

AO3 link for those that prefer:

Remy was brushing Hot to Trot. His precious stallion had just won best in show effortlessly. 

“Thanks for the apples boss. I’m glad to have pleased you.” 

“You’re always such a good boy for me.” He brushed happily while he praised him. His eyes caught on a certain part of his centaur's anatomy. While he was distracted the brush slipped out of his hand. It dropped into a giant  hole in the stable wall. He tsked. Hadn’t he told Charlie to fix it ages ago… docked wages for everyone then. He reached in to get it. It had landed farther than he’d expected.

He got on his tippy toes to try and reach it and finally managed to grab it. But lost his balance and couldn’t get back out. He tried his best but his feet couldn’t reach the ground.

“Uh, little help here.” He felt a pair of hands on his ass. They rubbed all over him trying to get a good grip, but it just felt like he was being groped. 

“Of course boss… Um it's just… I can’t get a good grip on your hips.”

“Just use my pants then! Hurry up before someone notices!” 

“Yes sir!” With one ineffectual yank his pants were ripped off him. 

“…Whoops.”

“Damn it! What if someone sees me like this!”

“Oh uh… I know!” He felt his boots get yanked off and the rest of his visible clothes getting stripped off. 

“I’ll hide your clothes that way if someone comes before I free you they’ll think you’re a cow.” 

“Why would a cow be in the stables?” He felt Hot-to-Trot spread his cheeks. 

“To get some dick?” He offered unhelpfully. 

“Besides we both know how you were really gonna reward me.”  That… was a fair point, and the leftovers from an earlier liaison dripped out.

“See you’re already lubed… c’mon please?” He felt that wondrous shaft rub against him and his hesitation melted away.

“Fine but make it quick. I don’t need anyone getting ideas…” The novelty of getting fucked in such a position intrigued him, though he wondered how Hot to Trot would ge the necessary mobility.

He didn’t have to wonder for too long. He hilted in one thrust. He covered his mouth to muffle any sounds, though the thrusts were disappointingly shallow he couldn’t risk being recognized.

It wasn’t the kind of sex he was used to, and he found he was more sensitive to it. He wished the breeding bench was more private, it was more comfortable. He bit back a moan as Hot to Trot really started to get into it.

“Oi is that the boss I hear? Can I go next plea- oh! Is this a gift for us?” 

“Feck off! I’m the one who won the competition.”He recognized the centaur and knew that his dick was sublime. Maybe another round wouldn’t hurt.

“Uf, ah it’s fine. After Hot to Trot finishes you can go next Sapphire Dream.” The second he agreed he heard a symphony of his centaurs begging for a turn. 

“What about me?” Moor Fantasies. Thicker than average.

“And me?” Spotted Lightning. Curved.

“Please can I get a turn? It's been so long!” Jumping Juniper. The longest of all his centaurs. He came at the thought of taking all of them back to back. Meanwhile Hot to Trot gave his last couple thrusts before shooting inside. 

“Whatever fine. All of you can get a turn, just as long as no one blows my cover.” He muttered, as he felt Sapphire Dream pushing to take Hot to Trots place. Something rubbed on his ass cheek and without any fanfare, Sapphire Dream pushed into him. As always his technique was mind melting, and he had to focus extra hard on staying quiet. No one should disturb his centaurs, but he couldn’t imagine the cover up if one of the farmhands overheard.

His toes curled as he orgasmed again. Centaur after centaur, most came inside him. Others came all over his ass and thighs. He realized they were using a marker to leave tallymarks. At least they were being discrete. 

“Oi you lot? What’s all the ruckus in this pen, ‘avin a party without us?” He heard one of his dog boy overseers speaking. He couldn’t believe there were so many witnesses. He heard some laughter and compliments.

“I’d know that ass anywhere. Who's got next round?” Somebody smacked his ass, as the centaur inside him bucked harder. Hot to Trot spoke up.

“You want a go at ‘im have at it. Boss got stuck, maybe a fat knot can pull him out.” 

“Shit let me gather the boys and we’ll make a competition of it. Brutus might be the only one who can actually do it tho.” While Sparky presumably left to go get backup, the centaurs kept fucking him. When it was finally the dogboys’ turn to have a go at him, he immediately knew the difference. 

While their cocks were smaller, being bipedal afforded them more mobility. So the pleasure was still there. They were off to a great start with Shredder, whose length and skill had always been satisfactory.

“Don’t worry boss, we know how you like it so I only brought the biggest dogs. No toys here.” He heard Sparky say while a hand rubbed his ass. 

“Shit your ass is skilled. All those fucking centaurs and you still feel like a dream.” Shredder moaned. His dick twitched at the compliment. 

“Shame his mouth’s not available.” Whined Patches.

“We’re on a mission, remember? Whoever gets the boss out gets to be alpha for a day.” Another orgasm was wrung out of him. He took his hands off his mouth to feel at his bloated belly, with all the cum inside him he wasn’t sure if he’d be able to get out. 

Shredder came inside him, and stuck his knot in with ease. Unfortunately, he popped out with one yank. His toes curled as he came once again, jeers and cheers rang out through the stable. He felt another tally mark get added. And the next contestant took a stab at it. 

His boys were so well trained. Some were more enthusiastic, spanking him or planting kisses on his cheeks. But none of them were able to keep their knots in for more than a couple pulls. Finally, he sensed Brutus, the dog boy biggest in size and cock, stepping up to him. His hands spread his cheeks. Cum dripped out of his hole, and his own dripped down his thighs.

“The state of you. Boss you know I hate sloppy seconds, but I don’t think I can eat all this cum out of you. Tusk would probably love to feast on this. Heh, maybe we’ll go find him after my go.” He felt Brutus push in and closed his eyes. His thickness always made him go cross-eyed, and with his sensitivity currently maximized a moan slipped out before he quickly muffled himself. Brutus started talking him through it,

“Mmm, one day I’ll be able to fuck you in an open field. You won’t have to hide a thing. You’ll be able to take all the dick you could ever want without a care in the world. Scream as loud as you want, free as can be.” The fantasy and the physical pleasure had him cumming again. Brutus fucked him through his orgasm and he felt that knot press it’s way in. He bit his hand to keep his mouth shut. 

When Brutus was finally locked in with him, he started trying to pull him out. It was actually the closest he’d gotten to being pulled out of the hole. But his stomach was too swollen with cum. His freedom no closer, he tried to contribute to his freeing, but he didn’t budge. Brutus sighed and gave up.

“Hm, I’d keep trying but I don’t want to hurt you. Guess you really are stuck huh Boss?” He felt another tally mark get added, and the two of them settled in. This was fun, but he was starting to get seriously concerned he was stuck. 

“Who told you fuckers you could have an orgy in here!” He heard one of the farmhands shouting. His stomach dropped, he heard Brutus cuss under his breath. 

“Listen, it’s our stable, we can do what we want. Remy told you guys treat us with respect.”

“Remy’s not here right now is he? You’ll obey me.” Who was this low level farmhand to disrespect his centaurs, he bristled with anger. He thought he could act with impunity, he’d turn the bastard. 

“Why’s that fucking mutt stuck to the wall?” He heard Brutus growl.

“Get outta here or I’ll rip out your throat!” He snarled. He’d never heard Brutus sound so possessive.

“You can’t say that to me, wait till I tell the supervisor!” He couldn’t stand that whiny voice. 

“Fuck the little bastards gone to tell. We gotta dash! Suck in your gut boss, sorry if it hurts.” He heard rustling in the stable as he and Brutus doubled their effort to get him out. He didn’t budge and even Brutus managed to pull his way out of his ass. Cum streamed down his legs. And he felt two pairs of hands trying to pull him out. He didn’t budge and worse he could hear the farmhands returning.

“I swear it’s true!” The farmhand must of brought back up.

“Fuck! Sorry boss! If the loser tries to get handsy we’ll rip his head off for you.” He was left hanging there. Cum slowly dripping out of him. He hoped he wasn’t completely visible. He heard Charile 

“The only thing in here is a centaur Lyle. Get outta my sight I’m sick of you wasting my time.”

“But I swear I saw- ” 

“Out of my sight!” The stable went silent for a minute. He heard Charlie speak a few minutes later,

“So what’s that behind you?”

“A cow wandered in, we’ve been having fun with ‘em.”

“I’ve never seen a horseshoe brand before, must be new. I’ll have a go then and Remy won’t find out.” He hadn’t even realized his tattoo patch had been peeled off. Hot to Trot had the nerve to chuckle before asquiencing,

“Go ahead.” He felt human hands spreading his ass cheeks. 

“A right mess, but ass is ass.” He heard a belt getting unbuckled and pants dropping. He expected a cock plunging in, instead he was jolted by the sting of a belt. 

He let out one quickly muffled yelp as Charlie started whaling on his ass and thighs. He hated being spanked, but to his dismay his dick started getting hard. Smack, smack, smack, smack… he lost track of how many. But Charlie’s strength didn’t falter. He came shamefully and tried to hide it with his thighs. Hot to Trots chuckles only deepened his embarrassment. When his ass was sore and covered with welts the spanking finally stopped. 

“I can tell you’re a right little slut. Haven’t begged once to be freed. Naughty cows who sneak out their pens get punished, if you want centaur dick get it in the field ok. I don’t want to catch you sneaking in here again.” A hand rubbed at his ass cheeks before a cock finally pushed its way in.

“I dunno Charlie, seems like he liked his punishment.” 

“Shit with an ass like this I’ll punish him as many times as he needs.”

“Heh, don’t let Remy catch you doling out unapproved punishments.” A hand slapped his already sore ass.

“Psh with a dick this small he’s got a long way to go till his production is high enough to matter.” For the first since his ordeal his dick got rubbed and he came immediately. 

“Aw” Charlie cooed. “I could fall in love with this ass, it’s a shame Remy won’t sell. I’ll keep an eye out for you in the field, horseshoe.” A few more thrusts and Charlie pressed against his back. While he doodled on his backside Charlie muttered to himself.

“That was heavenly. I might be in love.” He heard the sound of pants being adjusted and a camera shutter.

“It’s not a problem, long as it ends up back in its pen by nightfall.” With one last smack to his ass Charlie left. 

“I’m having another go. Then we’ll see about getting you out.” Hot to Trot said. He was spineless as he got fucked again. This time Hot to Trot came all over his ass. Their desires sated for the time being the two renewed their efforts to get him out. Unfortunately try as they might he was stuck fast. 

Some of the centaurs and dogboys came back and tried workshopping solutions. Of course he wasn’t neglected, they kept a solid train going while they tried to come up with ideas. 

“Oi we saw Charles walking with an unusual zest for life after coming in here? Oh? What have we here?” Hot to Trot was quick to speak.

“A slutty little cow. You boys want a go?”

“Hell yeah! I’m going next.” He heard camera shutters as the centaur finished inside him. Within seconds the eager farmhand was taking his centaurs place. At least he couldn’t recognize them, but he wasn’t sure how he would face his employees tomorrow. Their technique was lacking even in his overstimulated state. They laughed and degraded him as they took their turns. Hopefully they would finish quickly and he could get a few more centaurs in. 

“I wonder if he could take two of us at once.” As worthless as their dicks were, he could probably take three of them if they could figure out the positioning. They spread his ass wide and laughed as they prodded at him trying to fit.

“Wait, hahaha, Niki get a good shot of this.” 

“Um well see, Mr. Remy hasn’t-” 

“Remy’s not here bruv. Don’t worry it’ll be for our own private collections.” A few seconds later he heard cheers and whoops, so he could infer that he was being filmed. He was going to kill them. Anyone he could trace back to this was getting turned.Though he could begrudgingly admit that the double penetration was passable. 

The one on the left was rabbiting into him, while the one on the right paced his thrusts. He felt an orgasm slowly building, maybe he would train his dog boys to triple team him. 

The pair actually managed to sync their orgasms. If he could speak he would have teased them. The pair pulled out abruptly and added their tally marks without any concern for his pleasure. His ruined orgasm had him gritting his teeth. 

“Why don’t you have a go cameraman?” 

“Oh, I’m quite alright. I just like to watch.” They booed him and started a chant.

“Fuck the slut!” He could kick them, these imbeciles were going to get even more attention.

“Alright! Fine I’ll fuck him! Happy?” The cheers had him rolling his eyes, how ripped could the bastard be? Niki never so much as got an erection at the shoots. 

The whooping and wolf whistles continued. Niki pressed against his rim almost nervously. He suppressed a sigh, a dick with no confidence, how disappointing. 

But when he finally pushed in he had to reconsider his assessment. Niki was on the larger side of all his human partners. He tried to hump against Niki’s dick, if Niki wouldn’t put his back into it he might as well take what he needed. Tragically he was stuck fast. 

“Oh you’re desperate for it huh? Heh, just this once, I’ll participate.” Then came the first thrust, the clap of his ass resonated throughout the barn. A hand on his back kept him stable as Niki started building up strength. Drool slipped out his mouth. He might just have to turn him into a bull. 

He covered his mouth to stifle any noise. Niki was really showing these louts how it was done. Of course, the peanut gallery had commentary. 

“Damn they’re really getting into it!” Niki grunted at that, but his thrusts only intensified. His eyes rolled up as he finally orgasmed. He wasn’t sure if it was dry or not. The overwhelming stickiness was really the only thing he could feel down there.

“Aw look at his little dick twitch! How cute!” 

“Tch, I’m missing an amazing shot, but pov shots are en vogue. Hah, your amazing darling, you were made for the camera.” Niki rubbed his thigh gently before finally hilting and cumming inside.

When he pulled out a hand spread his cheek and kept him there till some of the spend dripped out. 

“Thank you darling, I think I’ve found a new muse.” A gentle hand petted his thigh before adding yet another tally mark. 

After that it was a blur of nondescript dicks interspersed with dog boys and centaurs being used as entertainment. He savored those moments, along with the occasional well endowed farmhand. He wasn’t sure how long it’d been or how many. He’d long since lost count. A gruff voice broke him out of the haze.

“Har har har, oh you stupid slut!” A giant hand slapped his ass. Of course Big Tusk had finally made his appearance. He felt the greedy hog press his mouth against his rim and start eating the cum out of him.

Hopefully the pig would eat enough that he could finally get pulled out the damn hole. Honestly at this point he didn't even care if his identity got discovered.

Once Tusk decided he was full, he of course took his turn fucking him. The massive weird cock had always been a guilty pleasure for him, but overstimulated he could feel every curve inside of him. Tusk was rougher than usual and his stomach bulged with every thrust. He had one last almost painful orgasm as Tusk twitched inside of him.

The asshole laughed and left his tally mark. And then with one final slap on his ass he was left. He heard Hot to Trot speak up,

“Alright you lot that's enough innit, poor little bugger has probably had all the sense fucked out of him.” He was grateful there was finally a voice of reason. Though there were some complaints they left him alone. A few minutes later Hot to Trot spoke directly to him,

“They've gone. While the humans were passing you around I went and got an axe, so I should have you out in a bit. Just relax.” His response was more of a noise than a coherent thought. He was limp as Hot to Trot broke down the wall holding him hostage. Once he was free he was lifted gently and placed on his own two feet. Immediately his legs turned to jello and he struggled to hold himself up. Luckily, his centaur kept him standing up.

“My word you're a mess. Brutus got you some overalls, so you can be a bit more discrete leaving.” Hot to Trot was gentle while he helped him dress. His mind was still a bit fuzzy but he was starting to ground himself.

“Alright now get before anyone sees you.” With a kiss on the forehead he was sent out. He staggered out of the stable, thankfully with the presence of mind to check for anyone. With his stomach bloated and cum dripping down his leg, it would be obvious to any participant who he really was.

He was slow and meticulous making his way back to the mansion. But it wasn't too difficult, he was experienced sneaking around the farm after all. 

Once he made it to his bedroom, he resisted the urge to crawl straight into bed and forced himself to his bathroom. He finally got a good look at himself in the mirror and gasped.

His lower half was practically covered in bruises and tally marks. And he was covered in so much cum it looked like he had taken a milk bath. All this would definitely clog his damn plumbing, but he couldn't help but wonder when he'd do it again.

[avocado-frog]

Incorrect Quotes Tag

As u know I love doing incorrect quotes so thank you to @riveriafalll

Rules: create a set of “incorrect quotes” (either using a generator or your memory, feel free to adjust them to your needs) for your ocs or characters!

---

Cass: Accidentally indulged in too much 'free time', turns out I've been reported missing for over six months and presumed dead by most local and national authorities.

-

Dylan: I have the sharpest memory here - name one time I forgot something. Sam: You forgot me in a Walmart parking lot at 2am a day ago. Dylan: I did that on purpose, try again

-

Cass: The secret of life is to always use more spinach and less rice than you think you'll need Cass: The second secret to life is that fresh air, warm sun, and a cup of tea will make your problems small enough to start handling Cass: The third secret to life is that, sometimes, violence really is the answer

-

Lily: I personally don't think it's possible to come up with a crazier plan. Elliot: We could attack them with hummus. Lily: I stand corrected. Elliot: Just keeping things in perspective.

-

Lily: You can de-escalate literally any situation by asking 'are we about to kiss?' Lily: Doesn't work with getting out of speeding tickets, though.

-

Cass, about Leo: They're covered in blood again. Why is it they're always covered in blood? Logan: Well, it looks like it's their own blood this time.

-

Kai, planning a group disguise: You cannot be Blake Bortles. Jaxon: Fine! Then I’ll be Jake- Kai, under his breath: Don’t say Jortles. Jaxon: Jortles! And I work at the molotov cocktail department.

-

Leo: Dylan, what is the ONE thing I asked you NOT to do tonight? Dylan: Raise the dead. Leo: And what did you do? Dylan: Raised the dead..

-

Leo: I hate you. Jaxon: Well, according to this picture I drew of us holding hands, that is untrue.

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Emily: I’m going to kill Jaxon! Leo, completely monotone: Oh no. Don’t.

-

Logan: We need to distract these guys. Dylan: Leave it to me. Dylan: Centaurs have six limbs and are therefore insects. Discuss. Lily & Jaxon: *immediately begin arguing*

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Dylan: When I first got my autism diagnosis, my first thought was "woah... it's canon" and I think that maybe thoughts like that is why Logan made me get tested.

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Logan: People always ask me how I maintain control in my house with eight kids. The answer is: I don't. I have no control here. Jaxon called me into his room the other day and Dylan shot me in the neck with a nerf gun. Logan: I don't even know what a nerf gun is.

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Ryan: *double checking supplies in the boat* Compass. CB radio. Sunscreen. Dylan: Hot dog costumes! Ryan: I'm sorry, what? Dylan: You know, in case we get lost at sea, and one of us, probably Elliot, goes mad with hunger, we'll put these on. Elliot hates hot dogs, so he probably won't eat us. Ryan: Are you saying that Elliot would rather eat us than hot dogs? Elliot: I do hate hot dogs.

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Sam: What's your greatest fear? Dylan: Being forgotten. Sam: ... Sam: Damn, that's deep. Sam: Mine is the Kool Aid man, but I feel kinda stupid about it now...

---

Tagging: @elizaellwrites

@bikaribechic

@elsie-writes

Open tag as usual

[steampunkserpent27]

Don't Eat Those

for @hdcandyheartsfest 's prompt: Surprise rated: G CW: Deer-Centaur Draco A sequel to this

He was observing a young tree, one that had just started to bear fruit. Its leaves were short and spiky, reminding him of wide pine needles. They ran down the length of the stems, giving the green foliage a dangerous and hostile appearance. Growing in small clumps were round, red berries. Only these berries had a hole in the front of them, revealing the seeds inside. They were strange berries, ones he had never seen the likes of before. He plucked one of the berries free from the stem and rolled it around in his fingers. It was smooth and soft, crumpling, as he crushed it, staining his fingers a dark red. “Don’t eat those. You’ll die.” He flinched, completely surprised and turned to find Draco watching him from behind a large shrub, before he stepped out into the open, his white fur glistening in the sun. Draco looked annoyed, as if he was about to scold a disobedient child. He wiped the juice off on his trousers. “I wasn’t eating them.” Draco crossed his arms over his chest, as he trotted over to him, his short tail flicking up and down, as if agitated. “No. You were just about to. Don’t you know anything?” “I was not.” He fought against the urge to roll his eyes. “I wasn’t raised in the forest, how am I supposed to know which berries are safe and which ones aren’t?” “Even fawns know not to eat yew berries. They’re one of the easiest to identify.” Draco stomped his cloven hoof into the dirt. “And there’s not even any flowers this time?” “What?” “You didn’t bring me flowers. You brought flowers last time.” 

“Oh. No, I didn’t.” He ran his fingers through his hair, pulling a loose curl out of his eyes. “I didn’t think you’d want more.” Draco turned away, sticking his nose into the air. “Whatever. I didn’t want any anyway.” “Don’t be cross. I’ll bring you flowers next time.” Draco continued to walk away, as he refused to look at him. “Okay. I’ll get you flowers now.” He suggested, unsure of what to do. There was a brief pause, before Draco stopped and glanced back at him from over his shoulder. “You’re clueless, you know that?” He shrugged and leaned against a pine tree. “I’m trying my best, but it’s not like you’ve told me much about yourself or your customs.” “Well, I’m not really meant to.” “Why?” “Because you’re an outsider, and I’m just not meant to.” Draco gestured wildly with his hands. “Would you be punished?” Draco looked him up and down, his eyebrows furrowing. “No, but they might delay my…” He fell silent, his expression turning to annoyance. “I’m not meant to be talking to you about this. Stop asking questions.” “You’re very secretive. I have to ask questions.” He pointed at the bow slung around Draco’s chest. “What do you use your bow for?” Draco continued to glare at him. “What did I just say?” “Not to ask questions?” “Precisely.” “But why? It’s not like I’m a threat to you. You’re like the size of an ox.” He opened his arms wide, indicating how large Draco was. “What part of ‘I’m not meant to’ do you not understand?” He let out a huff, mumbling under his breath, “It’s just stupid, is all I’m saying.” Draco repositioned his bow, as he shook his head. “I’ve got to go.” “Already?” “I’m not even meant to be out here. They’ll come looking before long.” Holding back a sigh, he pulled away from the tree, moving closer to Draco, although he remained a respectable distance away. “I was going to get you flowers.” Draco paused by the edge of the clearing, one foot-step away from the foliage. “I like bluebells the most.” Then he was gone, and Harry was left wondering what bluebells looked like and how exactly he was going to find them.