#oh my land

[sadboytristan]

Man, I have the audacity to roast Felix as if I didnt step into the shower and say "ayo?? What the fuck am I stepping on?? Why my feet squishy???"

I got in to the shower, WEARING MY GODDAMN S O C K S- and you know what, I couldve rolled with that BUT TELL ME WHY

I SCREECHED "J I M I N E Y J A M I N E Y" like I was BORN AND RAISED SAYING- like it was the moST NATURAL THING FOR ME,, rolled right out my MOUTH just like that

AND THEN I GOT HIT WOTH THE ONE TWO GUTPUNCH, staring off LIKE THEY DO IN THE O F F I C E

AND I SAW INSANE FIX IT FELIX JR LOOKING AT ME THROUGH MY OWN GODDAMN REFLECTION-

THIS WAS MY FACE, THIS WAS THE EXPRESSION-

It's been hours, it's been SIX HOURS and this has HAUNTED me ALL DAY

It was the way my mom waited AN HOUR before asking me "hey so...you uh, yelled Jiminey jaminey?? Or were you listening to felix in the shower???" WHICH ONE IS WORSE??? She thought I was LISTENING TO HIM WHILSTINTHESHOWER-

[somewhereincairparavel]

i will never understand how people have the heart to hate Jason even after they found out that his Ambrosia tastes like fucking sawdust. Ambrosia being tasty is like one single happy thing a demigod can have despite their tragic lives, because it reminds them of the home they once had, but lost. And Jason doesn't even have that, he doesn't even have a home to lose in the first place.

[hinamie]

i don't normally participate in these redraw challenges but it's megumi so i'll make an exception

[clambatch]

like a murmuring brook

curving about you

[four-pointed-leaf]

happy pride month

[phoenixtakaramono]

【TIMESKIP】

I think the Princess of Hell and her devoted knight make a great powerhouse couple

Higher-Res Version: Twitter

[paintpanic]

👑

[octopuspot]

I am not immune to his cutie beam 😔

[izzystizzys]

There is a scratch mark on the floor of the Council chambers that Mace has never noticed before. Not a deep one, mind, quite shallow. This matters because it’s making the white-hot pulse of agony stabbing through his eyeballs ebb momentarily. Then, he chances a glance upwards at the fidgeting Knight in front of them, and it returns in full force.

Huh, he’s never seen Oppo Rancisis’ face turn that colour before.

“Hmm”, Master Yoda hums, deep and scratchy. His expression is unreadable even to Mace beyond a baseline gremlinness, and the force with which he grips the edges of his seat is making his bones creak. Master of the Order you should become, they said. Follow the calling of the Force, you should. A fulfilling purpose, it will be. Mace is going to hunt the little goblin for sport when this is all over, and he’s going to laugh the whole time.

“Show us the livestream again, could you, Knight Parvo?” Yoda asks. Mace bursts a capillary, he’s pretty sure, and so does poor Knight Parvo, whose orange Mon Cala skin tips all the way into blood red with stress. “Most unusual, this is.”

“Absolutely not!”, Ki Adi intervenes before Mace has to, thank the Force for little mercies. Plo Koon’s tusks tremble slightly with either suppressed laughter or abject horror, maybe both, and Stass Allie has her head in her hands. “The holo stills should be enough”, Ki Adi proceeds to add, and Mace has to reconsider all feelings of grace he just felt towards his fellow Councillor.

He never wants to watch Yoda zoom in on someone’s abs again. Or Depa raise her eyebrows at the curve of thighs bent over the dripping front of a speeder.

“Speeder Wash For Our Troops”, his former padawan reads out loud from a still of what has to be hundreds of the things gathered in the public senate parking lot. “Fund Our Boys And Get A Wet Seeing-To!” The series of images features dozens of Coruscant Guard troopers in various stages of unkitted, gleaming and shining with soap suds and water. The fact that the whole thing is also massive shatterpoint after massive shatterpoint is, quite frankly, insulting.

“Well hello- oh dear”, Obi-Wan’s blue form crackles to life in his chair, followed by several sounds of choking that are definitely not him. Good, Mace thinks acidly. If he has to deal with this, then so does kriffing Skywalker. “I’m sorry, why am I looking at Commander Thorn using a washrag like a lasso on top of a speeder?”

“Oh, the Guard’s little fundraising project”, Bail Organa says, as he steps into the Council chambers. Normally, Mace likes the man well enough. Now, he just smiles and adds on, “I’ve already donated, in mine and Breha’s name. Remotely, of course.”

“The Guard’s fundraising speeder wash?”, Obi-Wan repeats, edges of his holo form flickering with what Mace suspects is Skywalker very unsubtly trying to edge in. Force, but the man really is horrible at any and all stealth, like kissing his secret wife in an open arena in front of his Master. “And they are fundraising for…?”

“GAR budget allocations have to come from somewhere”, Organa shrugs. “And with the tide of public opinion turning, they’ve been tending towards cuts. The Guard feels them more keenly than any other sector - they’ve been reduced from half to quarter rations, and medical supplies have not made more than a token appearance in the last draft. The Chancellor has cancelled three consecutive meetings on the matter, and thus it was agreed that a more hands-on approach was needed. Any surplus will go into the Army fund.”

“Surely it can’t be that dire”, Oppo protests, a slightly less concerning shade of purple now. Senator Organa shrugs again, jostling the smattering of cracks slowly building around his person in a way that makes Mace wince quietly. “It’s all publicly available data, Masters.”

It really can be that dire, as it turns out. And quarter rations is only scratching the surface of how dire, considering the Guard has apparently never had access to bacta in all their posting, and also includes requisitioning forms available to the Senate for reconditionings and decommissionings, two words Mace has only heard Ponds whispers amidst shuddering in the early days of the war before Shaak Ti went off and just about tore some throats out over it.

“Alright”, he concedes, rubbing at his temples. “Fair enough, we have failed to tackle a massive blind spot in the Guard’s well being. There is no Jedi assigned to Coruscant, and that’s an oversight on our behalf. But how in the everloving kriff did this get past the Chancellor and Commander Fox?!”

Who have both signed, black on white. Bail Organa smiles cryptically. “Well, if you scroll a bit past that one image, up to the industrial speeder in the back - Commander Fox is currently having credits stuffed into his codpiece in the back, I believe.”

“HE’S WHAT IN THE WHAT NOW”, Commander Cody screeches through the speaker of Obi-Wan’s holo image, and Mace has to summon every bit of Jedi-serenity he possesses in his body to keep from dropkicking a cackling Yoda through the chamber windows.

[finifugue]

something something Logan "my best friend on the grid is Oscar" Sargeant

and Oscar "I know Lando the best" Piastri

and Lando "Oscar doesn't play golf or Padel (like me and Carlos)" Norris

and Carlos "most physically affectionate with Charles" Sainz

and Charles "my best friend on the grid is Pierre" Leclerc

and Pierre "why are you all so weird about your teammates I fucking hate my teammate" Gasly

[pinksilvace]

ROTATING HIM IN MY HEAD AT AN ACCELERATING VELOCITY

[thebansheeoflamordia]

[noctiilio]

Look I only want the best for my favorite touhous I went on a rant the other night and so i present to you a glimpse into a world where Flandre Embodiment of Scarlet Devil and Gengetsu Lotus Land story are best friends (and this is where the picture with the flying cars utopia should go to prove my point)

[recalled11]

Directionless Pt. 4

Pt. 1/ Pt. 2/ Pt. 3/ Pt. 4/ Pt. 5

[taohun]

my baby here on earth, showed me what my heart was worth, so, when I die, which I must do, could it shine down here with you?

[chaotic-neutral-knitter]

so anyways I wanted to attach this to a reblog of this post but I couldn't and I just feel like the people need to know exactly how he said this sentence because it's so so so funny.

Taika Waititi: --and I like to go on, personally, because I'm ego-mad, I like to go on social media and see all of the fan art and see all of this incredible soft.. gay.. porn.. that's been created around our characters and stuff and I just really get off on it BUT it's really nice for, uh, to, to see people say, "Finally!" --