#oh my dear little friend
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#startrix#starlight glimmer#my little pony#mlpfim#mlp fanart#fanart#friendship is magic#mlp#trixie lulamoon#the great and powerful trixie#starlight glimmer fanart#trixie fanart#trixie#trixie mlp#starlight mlp#trixie x starlight#mlp fan comic#starlight x trixie#mlp comic#mlp big mac#big mac#trans big mac#mlp trans#I should have invited Trixie! I'm just not used to having friends. When we had drag shows in Our Town everyone had to show up.#Is this a normal thing to take a friend to? Can you bring friends to a drag show or would that be like a date?#HAHA! A date! With Trixie! Can you imagine! Hahahahahahahha ha ha ha ha ha Oh dear#Give it up for our first performer: The Great and Powerful Trixie!#Holy fuck.#captainzigo#do not repost
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I fucking LOVE that Donna is not immune to being a little starry-eyed over The Doctor in the way that many of us get a little starry-eyed over our best friends but she IS immune to being that way in front of them lmao. Double love that this appears to also be Catherine Tate and David Tennant's dynamic
#catherine in solo interviews: davids a phenomenal actor and genuinely one of the best people ive ever worked with and a dear friend#catherine when shes with david: oh my god. this fucking guy again#donna talking to wilf: hes absolutely brilliant and honestly a little magical and i miss him a lot i think we should be at each other sides#donna the second she sees the doctor: SUP DIPSHIT#doctor who#donna noble#tennant doctor
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ray: sand is not even my type!!1!!
also ray:
#only friends#only friends series#only friends the series#only friends ep4#ofts#firstkhao#sanray#sand x ray#first kanaphan#khaotung thanawat#gmmtv#thai bl#bl drama#oh my sweet sweet little boy#sorry to break this to you but you are in love my dear#kjdhsfs#😩😩😩😩😩#my boy khao really has the heart eyes DOWN like my god#no one does it like him#if he looked at me like that#i would start going to church
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Rank 52: The final duel!!
#I don't even know how to start in saying how much this scene hurt me. I don't even know if I can express what I'm feeling with words#because all I can think right now is how much I love Astral and how much he breaks my heart#he was born from hopes and he was given a mission that would protect the hopes and futures of his world (and all other worlds probably)#at the cost of his own existence#but that wouldn't have hurt because he wasn't created for feeling anything#He would have complete his mission with no regrets with no past with nothing to miss#just a little light of hope that would have defeated E'Rah sacrificing himself without leaving anything behind#and then he met Yuma#he started to know Yuma and his friends and adversaries and what emotions were#and the hollow hope become a person#a person who felt happiness fear love a person who now had a story and people who he would miss#and he still decided to carry on his mission because that would have protected what he now holds dear#those new emotions those connections were the key to beat E'Rah but were also what made him understand how tragic his fate was#but he didn't regret any of that#because it was Yuma and his friends and the emotions that they had made him feel that made his brief life worth living#(sometimes I forget that in the manga Astral was probably sent to Earth soon after he was created. That “brief life” is heart-breaking)#and Yuma asking him if he was okay with that and if he wasn't scared#and Astral saying that he wasn't given any means to feel such terror but he was now scared#and yet he found that fear wonderful because that means he was alive#all those emotions were what made him truly alive#not a tool not a hollow hope but a real person who still decided to sacrifice himself for protecting everyone#astral zexal#astral yu gi oh#yuma tsukumo#yu gi oh zexal#zexal#yugioh zexal#zexal manga#Zexal manga spoiler#ygo zexal
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Come have a drink, darling✨
Guys I am down bad for Mr. Gresley here. I’m so sorry. Like I am mad at myself I fell for his charms. If he would ask me for a dance I would say yes.
#ttte#thomas and friends#ttte human au#ttte humanized#ttte gijinka#ttte flying scotsman#flying scotsman#lner a3#lner#thomas and friends humanized#human au#ttte humanisation#oh dear oh dear oh dear#i am down bad#so so so bad#Scott you little asshole you stole my heart and semblance of purity#i am looking respectfully#fabulous mustache#the thoughts are not pure my friends
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Based off this post...<3
#changed the text a little bit because i love you masc presenting lesbians i love you sm#however#it's Reggie.#ANYWAYS#i don't draw him much because a friend was looking through my sketchbook and said that he looked like a “Dilf-y Mario”#and I haven't fucking recovered#also im not sure hat to do with his hair#hair doesnt make sense to me though tbf#i can't draw it the way i draw fur so it's just. strange to me#alas#anyways bringing starstuck content to the fandom is also my solem duty shoutout to those two who only exist in a very specific au to me#the rarepair ever dear lord#[agent moose's art]#ieytd#i expect you to die#john juniper#agent phoenix#reginald crane#the handler#OH YEAH BSL FOR PHOENIX!! YEAH!#i want to improve my own BSL since im english and it's the only other language I've been able to pick up#and so im practicing with phoenix#do i think phoenix is british? no absolutely not#where do i think they're from? they spawned in /j#anyways#ENOUGH RAMBLING IN TAGS#sorry it's like a safe space for me#boring ass caption then all the fun stuff is in the tags#starstruck
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thinking so so hard about LaughingStock and how that'd go down. disastrously, probably
#and ill talk about it at Length in the tags until tumblr cuts me off like a rowdy drunk after last call#please keep in mind this is all in my Brain and relationship dynamics etc are all technically speculation. anyway#so while franklydear is your more classic 'oh no im in love with him! / aw shucks im in love with him<3'#laughingstock is 'feelings what feelings / oh shit oh fuck this is bad'#to Me.#in my mind howdy is completely oblivious to his emotions#he's out here like 'gotta get the store impressively neat & shiny for barnaby! and everyone else' without blinking an eye#he starts assembling barnaby and wally's dogs slower an slower so that barnaby has to hang around a smidge longer than usual#he's out here giggling at barnaby's jokes while sweeping Hours or Days after the joke was told like a lovesick idiot#all while being like Ah Yes Barnaby My Dear Friend. My Platonic Buddy Whose Jokes I Laugh At A Little Too Hard. Platonically.#meanwhile barnaby Realizes his own feels. has a minor crisis. goes through the 12 stages of grief and absolutely panics#he's like 'ok just gotta play it cool. normal. dont be weird. he'll fall for your natural charm in no time'#'ill hold all of my feelings right here until i die or howdy reciprocates. i just cant tell anyone about this.'#'....hey wally you can keep a secret right'#and rizzes it up yk. rolls a nat 20 on charisma every time without howdy even realizing it. ig barns rolled for stealth too#and from barnabys pov its going great!#howdy is flirting back! hes showing all the signs! when eddie views their interactions he comes to barnaby later and is like A+ gay as fuck#so barnaby is a soft pining mess and howdy is Absurdly Oblivious despite being a clever & observant guy#so im imagining (will freely admit that this Train of Thought is slightly inspired by the latest chapter of Stamps by Indigopoptart)#that eventually barnaby is Confident in their budding relationship ok. hes ready to ask howdy out.#everyone who Knows (wally & eddie) are like Go For It He Clearly Loves You#and when barnaby tells howdy. howdys like 'ohhhh geez um im really flattered 🥺 but i dont feel the same 😔😭'#cue barnaby turning into the 'never again' meme while trying to laugh it off and pretend like he didnt just have his heart mr starked#so he goes home to smoke his pipe and cry and howdy goes about his day feeling Strange#why cant he stop thinking about that confession. what are these emotions. i mean its not as if hes in love with Ohhhhhh No. Oh No.#so howdy has his 'holy shit! im in love with barnaby! (lovestruck. swooning) ....Holy Shit I Rejected Barnaby (horrified. nauseous)' moment#cue howdy expecting barnaby to come by in the morning as per Routine so they can talk. he Doesnt. cue howdy stressing the fuck out over it#meanwhile wally sally (eddie sent her in his place. hes too busy) and barnaby are having a girls day (eating ice cream and watchin romcoms)#eventually barnaby hears that howdy has been Dropping The Ball and cant not check on him. cue emotional heart-2-heart outside the bodega#this is all very specific but its in my brain. these scenarious lull me to sleep every night lately
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how am i meant to emotionally recover from this
#oh my jakkkungz my favourite bffs ever in the world......#made me CRY like a little BABY hanbin u r so sweet...#their friendship is just so dear to me.........i cld go on abt it for so long....#and the little doodles from their rings........................#tearing all my hair out . theyre besties 😔😔😔😔😔😔😔😔😔#i hope they get to be friends for a long time theyre so cute 😔😔😔😔😔😔😔😔#iri.txt
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okay rambling time actually
i have so many identity issues (?) no one ever really sees me the way i see my self and i know thats because im currently incapable of allowing myself to act as I am due to my trauma caused by my father.
a n y confidence or personal opinion i dared to state as fact would get interrogated or questions or invalidated and that's resulted in me constantly, involuntarily, cushioning all my language in the tone "or whatever lol something like that lmao idk im just a stupid silly little guy!!! ive never had a thought ever lol lmao !!!!!!!!!" and I genuinely resent that.
its hard to break out of though because I do, also, enjoy purposefully joking like that. I can draw a line between that and my default behavior, its just hard; since the divorce, since his death, since finally being well and truly free, I have had to re-write myself. I'm doing better than ever yeah, this so called chrysalis phase of my life has by all account been awfully stress free, I am grateful for that.
I will never be grateful for being forced in to the molds I was by my father, I hope he rots alone in purgatory. To get back on topic- I am trying to 'fix' this, to rewrite myself into who I really am. It's kinda hard though; when your default is 120% "heehoo i am a sillay little gnome ive never had a thought in my life i am goofy !!!!" then anytime you do speak, plainly, like anyone else would, you feel like all of a sudden you're being "harsh" or "too serious." I know thats not true but part of me does, at least a little, fear that when I've grown into who I want to be the ones I love now won't be there / won't love me the same- I know that's unlikely, I know it won't happen, that if we fade from eachother it'd probably be for other reasons than my speech changing slightly. Because nothing else will change about me I'm not going to actually "get meaner" i'm simply a little frightened that's how it would sound to some.
But, you know. if, self-confidence and the real personality I have coming forward means I lose friends then were we ever really friends? in a way. I don't know but anyway that's only a small fear because I have deadpan phases and deadpan friends/people around me already.
It's the convincing myself to stop panicking everytime I let myself be confident or stoic or sure and secure. The day I've worked through most of the trauma that causes me intense anxiousness and insecurity is the day I can finally thrive and be me.
You don't know how tired I am of cushioning myself in language and tone that says "I am small. I am anxious. I am silly, goofy, tiny, harmless. I am not a threat. I am incapable of being a threat."
because people listen to you. and now that my father is dead and gone I got nothing to be traumatically defensive about like that.
#creativelyrottedmind#open journal#trauma mentions#the funniest part is that I'm not remotely afraid of confrontation.#normal conversation blindsiding me whilst shopping? oh dear god oh fuck oh no#someone trying to start shit with me? Oh yeah i know how this works lets go fucker#like. stop it.#what do you MEAN it causes me MORE anxiety to have to Move Like A Normal Man in the grocery store#than to fight someone verbally.#shows what i grew up with i guess#anyhow. i know who i am. i want to show that man more openly and proudly and confidently without the anxiety of expecting#the previous abuse I faced#i think i can get there#i am not 'a silly little guy' i am someone who has silly little guy moments#i wanna be seen as a comforting presence to my friends if possible but i want that to be associated with masculine traits/ my traits.#not the fake defensive traits ive been committing to since I was 12 to minimize abuse I'd be subjected to
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chocolate & peanut butter, aka "even i wanna make out with will right now" & other hits, aka hype reel for a thing i never ship until season 6 comes along and someone behind the scenes on this show loses their mind and/or has an epiphany
#if you look at this and think. oh my god dear internet buddy this is TEN MINUTES LONG#that is so valid. you are fully within your right to think that#but the problem is. you see. there is VERY LITTLE fandom content out there for this show#and i have SO MANY recorded little clips of mostly season 6 that had to go SOMEWHERE#and also the first version of this was 18 minutes. so hey. imagine the restraint i'm showing when viewed from that perspective#video#*#there is EASILY enough footage for a (slightly diluted) part 2#and also a will & gunnar & avery goofy best friends boy band compilation. and also an avery going 🙄 supercut#(maybe even one that flows seamlessly into will getting his turn at going 🙄 all the time)#(when his straight band mates create a love triangle and he's the only one not sleeping with the one (1) girl they brought in)#nashville#nashville abc#will lexington#gunnar scott
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at first I only wanted to include my main 8 f/o's but then I felt bad leaving the others out so here they are, all (starts counting) 19 of them! (here's the picrew I used btw)
#ray talks about.💫#my f/os#selfship#reblog game#proship#proship safe#oh boy i gotta tag them all#colourful swagger 🌈#against all odds 🖤#honey bones 🍯#my little blond boy ✨#that wonderful magician 🔮#my future number one 💥#the mischievous redheads 🍒#the loud and sleepy fam 🌓#floating cloud candy 🍬#best clown friends 🃏#lavender hues 💜#tape worm buddies 🧡#electric angel pals ⚡#dear machinery baby 💗#sapphire crystals 💙#the bunker duo ⚔️
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uh oh i can feel it rising in my brain
#very specific horror thats not really a horror for me as it is or will be for someone else. wuh oh#me gripping onto the moral lines i have drawn for myself for dear life no you do not have to manipulate people into liking you its fine tha#your friends have other friends they still like you for you you do not have to contort yourself into an untrue shape just to get a better#grip on someone else. its fine. relaaaax its okay its not that deeep :333#this is why idk if i should be allowed to date someone fr i get a little Too controlling for my own good and im aware of that however#being aware of it doesnt mean the urge to make someones brain me central with no room for anything else goes away#seph.txt
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a few highlights from earlier today:
- tom found a fucking weed cookie in his car
- i slapped adam's ass so loudly and so hard everyone died instantly
- kiki fell asleep like 6 times throughout the day
- BURGER KING SUCKS ACTUALLY
- michael js normal 👍
- penis explosion urethra explosion polycule
#chris noises#burger king sucks and i ate my first meal of the day at fucking. 5 pm. no one was having a good time.#but we did mario kart 👍 like usual. and i came in last place. also like usual#i think its funny to suck at games on purpose#like if i actually tried im sure i would be better at mario kart. but its funnier#and michael finds a lot of joy in seeing me play#oh and we dream daddyed a little bit that was good#i love my friends :)#ok goodnight dear followers#i just remembered i have a lot of new followers. you'll have to catch up on the chris lore.#misc#lame gang
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hear me out.....two of us by louis and piarles
i hear you anon... i hear you 😭💙
#asks & answers#anon#*oh* i love this song#it is so heartbreakingly beautiful#to me it fits more with pierre & anthoine perhaps than piarles??#but anthoine was charles' friend too#if that's what you were getting at; anon?#either way; yes i think it is a stunning song 💙 and can be very fitting for them#it isn't something i would ever try to write about personally though... i am very cautious when it comes to depictions of grief#*especially* when it comes to rpf you know?#because i feel like there *is* a line#this is a real person who really lost a dear friend#and writing our silly fics about that would... cheapen it to me?? idk how to explain it tbh#but yeah#sorry anon this is nothing at all against you!! this is just my personal little cautions and preferences around rpf#i really appreciate you sending this in <333#and i always LOVE people's song associations with piarles!!#louis + piarles ESPECIALLY is something I think should be explored a lot more 👀#SOOOO much potential there!!
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Would you like a Devil's Spider? What's your opinion on it? :)
Of course I would! Unfortunately, I do not know much about them. Also unfortunately, I have to go to bed very soon. I'll be sure set a reminder to make a longer post in the morning. Nothing like some good research to start the day! But just from my surface level opinions, they look very interesting! I wonder what purpose those lovely spines serve? Are they used for natural mimicry? For defense? For purposes currently unknown? I'll have to find out tomorrow!
#.txt#asks#my beloved moots <3#oh crap I am just now realizing I have an ask from another dear friend in my inbox as well!#ill come back to that tomorrow!#hope this sounds coherent & thank you very much for the ask!#what a wonderful little spider! I'm excited to learn more!
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why am i physically feeling sick what gives
#the 2nd interview is tomorrow#and as for my other plans they're not set in stone#nothing to be freaking out about that much oh dear#but my body decided nope you're gonna be a shaking little mess#i'm worried for my best friend's doggo#my late dogs appeared in my dreams#i wish i could pet them again#domi talks
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