#oh lain what if i died

[dnangelic]

She's here to offer a present, grin wide and bouncing forward on her toes: a cupcake, comedically misshapen, too large to properly fit inside its pastel wrapper. Bulbous on one side and concerningly flat on the other, the handiwork of a teenager with ideas loftier than skills. A generous amount of icing dotted with bright sprinkles threatens to spill over. Already some smears against her fingertips as she holds it forward. "Didn't know if you'd like chocolate or vanilla more, soooo I tried to marble it!" Don't ask where the others in the batch went (if they even survived, anyway).

@deiscension

and at first , he can't quite tell what it is that he's looking at . was it a cake ? a cupcake ? crème brûlée , the far more questionable and experimental variety , or an even more questionable and experimental-appearing icing-and-sprinkle soufflé ? try as he might to resist the immediate tickling poke on his sides at the ( just a little ! just a little lumpy ! ) sight , daisuke can't help but burst into laughter --- a high , explosive sputter that begins with him fruitlessly covering his lips until he's left spilling and bubbling out one cherub giggle after another , clutching his arms about his waist and hopelessly trying to pull himself back together .

' i'm --- sorry ! ' it's only after he's gone totally breathless that his hands , trembling slightly beneath the bright , brilliant red of his cheeks , make themselves able to properly accept her confection . ' shi qingxuan , i'm so sorry --- ! i didn't mean to laugh , i hope you didn't think i was making fun of you or something , it's just ... '

how could he have even begun to describe it ? seeing something like this handed to him so fearlessly , so boldly and energetically , brave even if only by the bold act of its very handing off in the first place . he could only admire it despite all of its obvious , and yet somehow endlessly endearing , flaws . how could she make even things like this seem proud and shameless ? for someone like him , who had similarly struggled himself to private tears and deep pits of depression over his lack of quality in just about every endeavor , the cake , cupcake , crème brûlée - soufflé was just ...

' i love it . i really do . ' enough that he could already feel his heart starting to pound , its shape no less a bulbous , asymmetrical thing , clumsily but carefully crafted by some god , no doubt . ' it's perfect . i mean it ... ! i can't think of a better gift , ' and he couldn't , really . no matter his curses , or shi qingxuan's own struggles that he was sure must have existed , wasn't this enough , at least just for the day ? a lopsided cupcake , a reason to be thankful that he had been born found in a friend , and the stain of icing that he could only hope would taste just as sweet in her mouth as would in his own .

' i'm going to take a picture of it so i don't forget ... ' and it wasn't a lie , though he's woven his running necessities into it . somewhere , for however briefly , would be azumano's one and only great phantom thief carefully framing her ambitious handiwork into the blurry box of flip-phone camera , an enormously pleased smile on his face . ' i'll be right back --- but i'm not going to start eating it unless you're right next to me , i promise ! '

[kiaxet]

HOW ABOUT THAT @somerandomdudelmao DISASTER TWIN REUNION, HUH

Went a little feral to the tune of 2.2K words of self-indulgence. What else is new?

~~~~~~~

Donnie can't sleep. More accurately, he won't sleep. Not until he's done. He'd never been one to leave a project unfinished; death and resurrection hadn't changed that.

He taps incessantly, repetitively, on a keyboard and screen, the motions long since past inputting data and now only serving to keep him awake. The repetition is soothing, easy, and - counterintuitively - he finds his head drooping forward into sleep-

And he snaps back upright. No. Not until he can confirm Leo is okay.

Leo is behind him, he knows. Breathing. In bed. Asleep. Very much alive. And-

He jumps and whips around as a thud sounds behind him. "What the-"

Leo is on the floor.

Well, that answers the question as to whether his twin is awake.

For a fraction of a second, part of him wavers uncertainly. He loves his idiot twin. The question he hasn't been able to answer is whether his reaction to Leo waking up will fall on love or idiot twin-

"Leo!"

He can hear the exasperation in his voice, and yep, it's the latter. He takes a knee next to Leo and hauls him into his arms, lecturing him all the while, and if he can hear the annoyance in his voice then Leo sure as hell can. Sleep deprivation for the purposes of keeping his brother's soul alight had done nothing for his temper. "I swear to God, all you had to do was make a sound! Why are you such a difficult patient?"

He deposits Leo carefully on the bed - "Sit still!" - and checks him over, running every scan he can think of and making sure his brother's new body really is in good working order, spouting increasingly irritated commentary all the while. Of course the fall didn't hurt him - Leo is tougher than that, and Donnie does better work than that - but he still can't help the rising anxiety in his throat.

This almost didn't happen.

"-stupid, stupid selfless idiot!"

Donnie almost couldn't save him.

"Grrhh-"

Leo nearly died for real. Permanently beyond Donnie's reach. Well and truly gone-

"Do you have any idea how close you were to having nothing left to save?"

And now here Leo is, in perfect health, sitting on Donnie's bed with a big dopey grin on his face as Donnie chokes on his anxiety and damn near shakes himself apart-

Oh for fuck's sake.

"Hey. Are you even listening?"

Leo speaks up for the first time since he's woken up, voice shaky from disuse. "D-Donnie?"

And that is not a goddamn answer to anything Donnie has been saying, because of course it isn't. It's Leo. He's always had his own priorities. "Yeah. No. You're not fucking listening." Donnie heaves a long-suffering sigh, sinking back into the routine comfort that irritation at his twin provides. "At least you're talking." Small favors. "Although I'm surprised you're not throwing your stupid jokes at me." Even smaller favors.

He stops short as Leo's hand closes around his wrist, drawing Donnie's arm to Leo's plastron. "You're real," his brother breathes, looking from Donnie's hand to Donnie himself with tears streaming down his face. "You're real!"

And then, in the space of a thought, Leo's joy breaks, his smile turning desperate. "Are you?"

For a moment, Donnie stares at his twin, wondering at the sudden change in expression. He takes a breath-

And the part of him that had lain dormant for so long after he'd woken up - the part of him that had been screaming for his twin's safety ever since they'd recovered the few scattered embers of Leo's soul - gasps to life, blooming like a time-lapse video of a flower and reaching to the edges of Donnie's soul. Leo had called it their twin sense, and Donnie hadn't had it in him to argue after a while. Whatever it is, it's back, connected to Leo's renewed presence, and-

Donnie's heart floods with emotions. Relief and joy sprout quickly and are nearly swept away in a tide of exhaustionanxietyfearfearfearfearFEAR-

But down beneath it all, steady against the rising wall of terror, is the little blue spark of hope that his brother always carried. His core. The thing that let him continue on in the face of insurmountable odds, and lent that same strength to everyone around him. A ninja's greatest weapon.

It's Leo. It's Leo-

And Donnie can't leave him alone in his fear. Not when there's no need for it. Not when they're safe.

He lets that breath out, and sits next to Leo on the bed. "Mhm. I'm alive. And you're alive. We're safe. The Krang are gone." That's all the news that's fit to print, or at least the most important parts. What else does he have to say?

Oh.

"I'm sorry I..uh…"

He's sorry he what? Died? Left a mess for Leo to deal with? Didn't do enough while he was alive to keep everyone else alive in turn after he was gone? Kept his brother's soul in a fucking mug, because that was the only way he could ensure he wouldn't break it while Leo was still fragile? All of the above?

…yeah, it's all of the above.

He owes Leo one hell of an apology, and he's never been good at any of this, so instead he shrugs haplessly and leans forward, pulling Leo into his arms and hanging on tight.

It's a matter of moments before Leo has him flat on his shell on the bed and is sobbing into his arms. Normally he'd hate seeing his twin cry, but it's proof of life - proof that Leo made it, that his soul is intact enough for him to still be Leo, that he's alive and awake and here - and Donnie will take it.

And if he's squeezing Leo back pretty hard himself, well, that's fine too. Nobody else needs to know.

~~~~~~~

Donnie is yelling at him.

Donnie is strong enough to have picked Leo up off the ground, well enough to be on his feet without support, running tests and reading Leo the riot act over his latest boneheaded maneuver - in this case, forgetting he was missing an arm and falling out of bed.

Donnie is yelling at him, because Donnie is here to yell at him.

And Leo is smiling, because he couldn't be happier. He lets the words wash over him, draping over his shoulders like a favorite cozy blanket that he'd lost so many years ago, and he basks in the warmth that is his brother's voice and smiles.

It's enough to interrupt the yelling for a question, though he doesn't really hear it - just keeps smiling, and says Donnie's name, and it's so nice to be able to say it with a smile now, because Donnie is here-

-he is, right? This isn't just a dying hallucination on Leo's part, right?

(It couldn't be- he remembers his death, remembers breathing his last, remembers being trapped- but this-)

He reaches out, taking Donnie's wrist in hand, and pulls his brother closer to him. "You're…real…" It certainly feels real - skin and scales, softer than his own, and his fingers barely fit all the way around the wrist instead of encircling them with room to spare - and he stares down at it, tears rolling down his face as he finally looks back up at his twin. "You're real!"

The Krang show you what you want to see.

The thought strikes him unbidden, turning his joy and relief to ice. It's a well-known fact: a Krang infection can show its host what they want to see, visions of comfort and family and home, and extract intel from the host's reactions. He knows that- he knows that, and-

And he'd died surrounded by Krang- and even if he couldn't see or hear or feel, he knows he'd been held captive-

But it's Donnie- he wants this to be real- he needs this to be real- he wants his twin back so badly he can't think, and the idea that this could be a Krang hallucination is almost too much to bear-

"Are you?" He can hear how choked the words are as they leave his lips, but he needs to know-

And Donnie stops, and sits down next to him, and tells him everything he wants to hear - everything he could've ever wished for. They're alive. They're safe. The Krang are gone. It all sounds too good to be true.

And then Donnie offers him an apology and a sad half-smile, pulling him into a strong hug-

And the ice in Leo's mind shatters in a flood of warmth as his twin sense opens for the first time since Donnie's death. He feels his twin's irritation, and deep-seated exhaustion, and a choking wave of guiltguiltguiltguiltguilt-

And beneath it all, steady and strong as ever, the thrum of unending determination, powered by an unfathomably deep well of love. It's the backbeat to the melody of Leo's life, the point-counterpoint to his own heartbeat- it's something he'd never had to live without until he did, but it's back, rushing in to fill the silence he'd known with the strength to go on and the knowledge that he is loved loved loved, strong and overwhelming and all-encompassing in the way only Donnie can love-

It's something the Krang could never imitate.

This is real. This is all real-

He throws himself against his twin, toppling them both over on the bed as he clings to Donnie, unable to stand even a fraction of an inch of space between them, as though he could push their hearts together through their plastrons, and he cries, sobbing out worry and terror and grief and the slow, crushing exhaustion of a losing battle finally lost. He cries as though the world was ending - and it had, once when the Krang had invaded and again every time he'd lost a member of his family, over and over until he'd sent his last hope through a portal that had cost his littlest brother his life and succumbed to death himself.

And now he's alive. Here, wherever here is, with Donnie. Clinging to his twin, and being held in turn as Donnie gently sits them both up, never letting go as Leo cries himself out.

It takes a while - long enough for Leo's gaze to settle into a stare and his thoughts to settle into a comfortable static. He's alive, Donnie is alive, and he has no fucking idea what else is going on, but he's just going to be okay with that for now.

His thoughts rouse enough to inform him of something wrong - the line of tension Donnie is carrying down his neck and over his shoulders. That won't do. Leo could try to massage it out with one hand, maybe try to get Donnie to talk about it, but Donnie never likes to talk about it, and Leo isn't one for slowly soothing away tension when he can just take an axe to the release valve instead. Plus, it gives him something definite to focus on, instead of…this whole situation. Whatever 'this whole situation' actually is.

Donnie had mentioned his stupid jokes, right?

"H-hey Dee?" His voice wavers from disuse, thick with tears, but he pushes through. "Why did- why did the tree buy a camera?"

"What?" Oh, Donnie is not going to see this coming. Excellent.

"To do a photosynthesis." It's nowhere near the level of pizazz he normally uses for a punchline delivery - he's still too tired and frazzled and clinging to Donnie entirely too hard for that - but that beautiful pause of a terrible joke sinking in tells him it had hit home nonetheless. Donnie moves - he can hear the telltale slap of face meeting palm - and then breaks down into helpless laughter, smacking the back of Leo's shell as the tension Leo had felt in his twin's shoulders abruptly relaxes. Good. It worked.

"This is so fucking stupid," is all Donnie manages as his laughter fades, and he slumps fully against Leo with a murmur. That's...abrupt. Sure, Leo had felt Donnie's exhaustion, but he hadn't realized it'd been that bad. He takes hold of Donnie, gently laying him down on the bed to rest-

Remember what happened last time Donnie fell asleep next to you.

He gasps sharply at the thought - not again NEVER again - and keeps his hand steady as he moves, laying both fingers gently against Donnie's neck and feeling for his pulse. It's easy to find, strong and steady and even, like it had been before the infection had taken Donnie's vitality and then his life.

But he's alive, and healthy, and sleeping. He's okay. And Leo-

Leo moves his hand to the side of his own neck. His pulse is also easy to find, quickened with the adrenaline of an unknown situation and multiple consecutive shocks to his system.

Okay. Take stock. Assess. Figure out a plan from there.

He's alive. Donnie's alive. The Krang are gone. And everything else…is a big fat question mark, with no easy answers and no indication as to where to begin looking for them.

Well.

Uh.

"What the fuck," Leo whispers to the room at large, as though the walls could answer.

~~~~~~~

(A world away and still very close, a younger pair of twins cling to one another the way a drowning man clings to driftwood: desperately, clutching tight, as though letting go will spell their doom. Neither of them know where the emotions came from, or why; all they know is that each of them are damn glad the other is alive, and they'll do everything they can to make sure that continues to be the case.)

(What the fuck, indeed.)

[wynnyfryd]

Trailer park Steve AU part 28

part 1 | part 27 | bonus stobin scene | ao3

cw: anxiety attack, graphic thoughts of death

Chapter 7

Steve's mom leaves the week before Thanksgiving.

No preamble, no notice, no "so long and thanks for paying rent," just— poof. Gone. Ta-ta, kiddo. Have a great life!

(Or don't!

Who cares?

Not me, that's for sure!)

The worst part is Steve finds out from Ernie of all people. Ma couldn’t even tell him to his face that she’s abandoning him to the gaping maw of this hellish town because she’s a good-for-nothing coward. Some day this place is gonna swallow him whole, splinter the bones and cough up the pellet, and Florence Harrington will be somewhere far, far away, sighing empty condolences over a fresh glass of red. “Just dreadful, isn’t it? Such a pity; what a shame.”

Steve’s hanging towels on the clothes line the day after the party — after the ride to drop off Max and the hangover brunch with Robin; after drowning his headache in Tylenol and finally getting home, only to realize that he can’t shower yet because all the towels are soaking wet — when Ernie looks up from his yardwork and casually ruins his goddamn life.

“You're wastin' your time with that,” he says, propping his weight against a rake and squinting at Steve in the mid-afternoon sun.

“What?” Steve frowns; hangs another towel. It's not like they're going to dry themselves. "Why?"

"Too cold."

"It's not supposed to rain, though, is it?"

"No, but the humidity—"

Screw the humidity. "I'm sure it'll be fine."

Ernie shrugs. “Suit yourself.”

He turns his attention back to his yard, dragging the rake over a smattering of damp leaves; obsessed with keeping his little patch of lawn pristine; and Steve reaches into the hamper and sincerely hopes that Ernie’s wrong. He needs a shower, and if the towels don't dry fast enough they get that gross mildew smell to them, and then it gets in Steve's hair, and how is he supposed to flirt with Eddie if he smells like musty lake water?

"Where's your mom off to, anyway?" Ernie asks after a moment. "Saw her leave this morning with two big suitcases,” he explains when Steve throws him a questioning look. “Figured she was off somewhere nice.”

Steve blanches.

Two big suitcases?

He didn’t even notice that she wasn’t here. Feels like a stupid, selfish asshole now, because he’d called ‘ma, I’m home!’ when he got in earlier and had thought nothing of her complete lack of response, the peaceful silence of the house; had welcomed it at the time, even, and what if—

Oh, god, what if she’d died?

What if she’d been lying there dead in her room, and Steve didn’t bother to check because he was too busy thinking about himself and how nice it was not to hear reruns on the TV for once? How long would she have lain there, rotting and bloated, and— and how long would his dad have, if the gunshot hadn’t rung out? How long; how long? Bleeding out on the carpet gurgling fish sounds everything red and Steve can’t breathe—

“Did she—?” he pants. Brings a hand to his throat; tries again. “Did you- see who she left with?”

“Some woman. Relative of yours, maybe? I didn’t get a good look at her. Had a real fancy car, though. Mercedes, think it was.”

Steve chokes on his own spit. Feels his throat close up, his heart pound and his ears ring and the yellow-purple-black start creeping in like vines at the edge of his vision, like demogorgon claws; like death’s shark-toothed grin. Hungry, howling, happy as it takes a bite out of him.

“You alright?” Ernie asks.

Steve grinds his jaw so hard he feels something crack. "Excuse me," he grits out, stomping back into the house.

—

"Fuck!" Steve shouts to his empty house — to the sun-faded paneling, to the weird stain in the orange carpet. Fucking Cecelia; fucking hell.

He cleans the house in a rage, eyes hot with unshed tears, and there's a note on the breakfast table. Crisply folded on plain paper, prim cursive letters, almost comically estranged:

Steven,

Apologies for short notice. Gone to stay with Aunt Cece in Evanston. Call or visit if you like.

— Mom

P.S. Happy Thanksgiving

The words leave papercuts in his throat. Steve rips the note to tiny pieces, can hardly see for the tears swimming in his eyes, but he's not crying over this; he's not. He fucking refuses.

Somewhere along the way, the cleaning turns to blind destruction, demolition of the all the little scraps of life mom left behind: her creepy angel figurines, her vintage Pyrex dishes, an empty bottle of old perfume. Steve hurls them all against the living room wall, delights in the shimmering pile of broken glass at his bare feet. Wants to crawl over it on hands and knees. Wants to burn this place to the ground.

When the sun dips below the trees he goes back out to check the towels. The air is wet, bitterly cold; nips at his hands when the wind blows, and the towels hang heavy on the line, just as damp as before but now the slightest bit stiff with the first creep of frost.

"FUCK!" Steve roars, ripping a towel down off the line. Yanking each one down in turn, throwing them into the dirt, raging, "What! Is! The fucking! Point!"

His tears spill over then, hot and wet as he sinks to his knees with a wounded growl, and he chokes there in the dirt; the cold, wet mud, the patchy grass. Gravel digs into his shins, and sobs wrack his chest, capsize him like plunging waves, and he can't do anything but shake and cry where the whole neighborhood can see. Making a commotion; making a scene, as his mother would say, but his mother's not here. She fucking left. She left him here, and his dad did, too, and Steve is utterly, truly, hopelessly alone.

"Come on, son."

And there’s Wayne Munson, coaxing him up off the ground with a sure, strong grip. Steve makes animal sounds as Wayne lifts him under the arms — ruined hiccups, mangled wails. There's mud in his lungs. Ocean silt; sucking sludge.

His mother's gone.

"Easy now," Wayne shushes; hugs him hard against his side. "You're alright, kid. You're alright."

—

part 29

tag list under separate reblogs, comment if you’re over 21 and want to be added tomorrow

[shuksstuff-blog]

Menjubo Madam

Hubungan aku dengan Madam ni mcm pasangan bercinta juga, kadang dia punya moody, letih juga nk melayan pe'el org tua ni, Ada sekali tu terkantoi, aku bawak awek office lunch, dijadikan cerita, naik kereta Audi yg dia belikan utk aku, memang ribut melandalah jawabnya. Aku igtkan dia dh fly ke KK, follow up dgn master payment disana, jadi aku curi2 la ngejas awek office bangunan sebelah, dua tiga kali mcm ada respond, jd bermodalkan Audi, manatau dapat merasa pepek muda. Belum smpat lunch, What App masuk, "I' ll Kill You", 'I know what you do!" dpt msg dr Madam, Ahh sudah, bisik hati aku, apahal pulak org tua ni,.   Selang beberapa minit, call in masuk,. aku swipe reject, nk makan kot. Dia call lg, aku swipe reject lg.

Selesai lunch, plan aku nk memantat dgn awek ni, tak jadi hari ni, kene lah postpone, jd aku trus drive blk office, hantar juga awek office sebelah. Aku melangkah masuk office aku je, Madam berdiri didepan meja aku, smbil tgnnya memeluk tubuhnya yg menampakkan tetek selambak dia tu. "Shut the door!" dgn nada yg tinggi, aku perasan staff2 lain terkejut dgn nada madam, sblm ni dia sorg yg peramah, jarang nk tggikan suara. Aku berjalan ke arah kerusi aku, dan duduk. "What wrong hunny?", nadaku yg rendah niat memujuk madam. "Dont you even 'hunny hunny' with me!, where are you going with that Bitch?!" aku agak terkedu bila madam berbahasakan begitu. Aku pun respond dgn baik, "I dont get it? who is the Bitch? i dont understand madam?". "Well the Bitch you taking to lunch just now!". "I see, are you jealouse with the "bitch" madam? and didnt you know who is the bitch rite now?"

Pertengkaran kami agak lama, cumanya lain staff tak la dgr sgt apa yg kami bertengkar. "I give you everything, anything, then you did this to me?" smbil mengalir airmatanya, suara yg menengkin td, kini dh redha. Aku memegang bahu madam, aku urut2kan supaya lebih tenang. "I know you love me rite?", smbil madam menggangguk tunduk, mukanya masih malu melihat aku. Aku mengaku yg aku ada keluar lunch dgn ex girlfriend aku dlu, walhal bukan pun, awek tu baru aku nk mencuba nasib. "Then what is she so special to you?" balas madam "you already touch all of me rite?". "Dont get mad when im telling you the truth, can you?" tnya aku kepada madam, dia hanya menggangguk saja. "Okay, she gave me all her hole, not only pussy". "Then let me give it to you also!, you want it now?" mencelah madam. Hatiku makin riang apabila umpan utk anal madam berjaya. "If that thing are special, why on earth you want to give rite now?, dont you want to take trip, only with me?" smbil memeluk madam, dia kini mendongan memandang aku, melebarkan senyumannya, dan kiss bibir aku, "i'll booked flight ticket now, we heading tmw". Oh senangnya bisik hati aku

Entah apa si madam ni discuss dgn boss aku, boss aku call, "Tmr, assist madam to Langkawi, this week im still at Bangkok, see you next Monday". belum smpat aku kata okay, dia letak fon. Sesampai saja kami di Airport Langkawi, ada kereta pick up kami terus ke Datai Hotel, dh macam honeymoon dgn madam kali ni di Langkawi, selesai check in, kami berangkat ke Cable Car, melayan la si madam berpimpin tgn, sebelah malamnya pulak, aku hanya bwk madam ke Rasta Hut Chenang, sesambil madam meneguk whiskey, aku dapatkan Weed, sebalut dua di bar, madam pun kian mabuk, aku ajak madam blk bilik.

Sesampai di bilik, madam terlalu horny, dlm lift pun dh meraba btg aku. Dilondehnya seluar aku, madam mencari btg nikmatnya utk diisap. Weed yg aku kena ni boleh tahan dengungnya, btg aku makin mencanak bila diisap rakus oleh madam, madam yg tanpa seurat benang masih hot dan bergetah, aku baringkan madam di katil, lidah aku laju mencari pussy, sesmbil aku memasukkan jari ke lubang jubur madam, masih dara, boss aku mesti tak reti anal. "Ahh, ahh ahh, plss fuck me babe" rayu madam bila pussynya terlalu becak dan stim. Batangku merodok pussy madam, menyentak2 madam dikerjakan aku, madam yg terkulai membiarkan saja aku meratah tubuhnya, seakan akan menurut nafsukunmenghambakan dirinya. Aku meminta madam menonggeng utk doggy, Clup clup clup, pussy madam menerima tujahan dr batang aku, terkemut2 pussy madam, dan akhirnya, aku melumurkan air pussy madam di lubang juburnya, batangku menekan kedalam jubur madam, madam tersentak "ahh, sakit". keluh madam, kian lama sakitnya hilang, rengekkan madam kini lain dari rengek bila pussy nya di tujah, kali ini lebih ganas bunyinya. "Arhg arghh arhgh, it fit baby, arhhh arhhh" moaning dr madam membuatkan aku hilang keruan. Sentakan demi sentakan btg aku, jubur madam semakin longlai, madam hanya akur dia diliwat ganas oleh staffnya, aku memancutkan benihku ke dlm lubang jubur madam, madam terdampar, dan aku menindihnya, batang masih lg dikemut2 oleh jubur madam.. kami berdua tertidur.

Sesedarnya aku, madam masih tidur, mungkin kepenatan, aku mencari stok weed smlm, smbil balut dibalcony, madam dgn shower robe, memeluk aku dr belakang, terasa panas tetek madam dibelakang aku. Madam mencium leher aku, meraba2 badan aku, bila aku pusing mengadap dia, btg aku dh terpacak. "Woaaa, always hard yaa, wait ya i need to take shower first". smbil mencuit btg aku. Madam meluru ke bathroom, punggungnya melentok2 semasa jalan, geram je aku tgk, tak padan dgn berumur, nafsu makcik cina ni masih berdarah muda, mungkin boss aku tak pernah melayan mcm aku, pancut je tido, pancut je tido.. Madam hanya berendam di dlm bathtub, aku berdiri disebelahnya, dicapai btg aku, terus masuk mulut dan hisap. Aksi kami di bathroom berlarutan, btgku hanya mensasar lubang jubur madam, akan tetapi, pussy madam aku rodok dgn jari hingga berlendir, barulah aku mula menujah jubur madam. Nafas madam semakin liar, juburnya tidak lagi mampu menahan tusukan btgku, dn akhirnya madam climax, pussynya memancut2 air dn meleleh di pehanya d keaddan madam berdiri dan menonggeng menahan di basin toilet, kaki madam longlai kesedapan, aku menahan dr madam jatuh, aku smbung fick jubur madam, "Arghh, arghh, arghh, baby cum in me baby" rakus rengekan madam. Aku menghaburkan mani aku lagi ditempat yg bukan sepatuynya.. Madam tak berhenti kemut kesedapan, badan madam berpeluh2 akibat pertarungan kami berdua.

To be continue..

[andromedanisa]

tinggalkan saja..

aku pikir semua orang itu baik, sampai aku sadar dititik "oh ternyata ada ya orang yang memang ingin memanjat lebih tinggi dengan mengesampingkan teman-teman disekitarnya".

kayak, aku nggak peduli orang mau ngomong apa, aku gak peduli orang nantinya akan terluka apa enggak, aku nggak peduli dengan hubungan kita berakhir baik atau tidak. ya nggak peduli aja, yang penting aku bisa mencapai puncak mimpi yang aku inginkan, yang penting aku selamat, yang penting aku nggak terluka, dan yang penting aku.

padahal untuk mencapai puncak itu nggak harus mengesampingkan atau bahkan menjatuhkan orang-orang disekitar. langit tak pernah menjelaskan mengapa ia begitu tinggi. langit tetaplah langit, tak pernah ia menjatuhkan matahari, atau bintang hanya untuk terlihat lebih tinggi, terlihat lebih baik, dan hanya ingin dilihat.

maka seharusnya diri kita juga demikian.

jika ingin mencapai puncak, naiklah tanpa menjatuhkan, naiklah dengan tenang, naiklah dengan kapasitas kamu memang memiliki kemampuan untuk itu. buktikan bahwa kamu mampu. buktikan bahwa kamu memang layak untuk berada dipuncak tertinggi. bukan menjatuhkan orang-orang di sekitarmu dan lucunya kamu malah merasa menjadi korban sebab orang-orang disekitarmu mencoba menjatuhkanmu.

ingat, hidup didunia ini cuman bentar banget. apa yang kamu tabur, nantinya akan kembali kepada dirimu, suka atau tidak. jika tidak menimpamu setidaknya ia tetap akan kembali kepadamu dalam bentuk yang berbeda.

ada satu kutipan ayat yang bagus banget, yang dimana ketika kamu tidak mampu membalas segala bentuk ketidakadilan atau kedzaliman yang menimpamu. ayat ini cukup untuk menguatkanmy bahwa semuanya akan menemui pembalasannya.

"Barangsiapa yang mengerjakan kebaikan seberat dzarrahpun, niscaya dia akan melihat (balasan)nya. Dan barangsiapa yang mengerjakan kejahatan sebesar dzarrah pun, niscaya dia akan melihat (balasan)nya pula” (QS. Az Zalzalah: 7-8)

Masya Allaah, berat banget yak pembahasannya. tapi ini bener loh, maka sebisa mungkin hati-hati sama orang yang kamu dzalimi, orang-orang yang kamu sakiti. dia mungkin diam, tapi doanya melangit kepada Allaah tanpa pembatas. dia tidak perlu pembelaan, baginya cukup Allaah sebagai penolong dan keadilan akan datang dalam bentuk yang berbeda.

better an honest enemy than a false friend.

but i think that if something's toxic and it's only ever really been that. what are you gonna do? just move on. it's fine.

jadi orang-orang seperti itu memang ada dan lahir. kamu hanya perlu berjalan pada kebenaran, jika memang bisa dijelaskan dan diperbaiki, maka lakukanlah. jika tidak bisa, serahkan semuanya ke Allaah. dan itu cukup.

tinggalkan semua yang menyakiti, dan hiduplah tanpa menyakiti. semoga Allaah menolong kita semua dari hal-hal yang berpotensi menyakiti orang lain meski terkadang kita tidak sadar atau tidak ingin melakukannya.

selamat tinggal || 11.49

[fwitolei]

The Dragon Prince Thoughts 6x09 - Stardust

Previous Episode // Masterlist // Next Episode

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Spoilers under the cut

“I called her my ‘unicorn’”

Okay why the FUCK are we starting with a villain backstory that I already know is gonna end horribly because he’s talking about his daughter in past tense

*mentally preparing*

*dEEp sigh*

*grabs tissues* Okay here we go

“Her name was Leola”

THE LOVE IN HIS EYES UGH—

ALSO leola’s last wish? The starr???

Woah runaan what happened to you—

It’s like ttm when the other moonshadow elves were in their phantom forms attacking rayla

Oh wait why aren’t tiadrin and lain like that—

Ooh maybe cuz runaan and the other elves had unfinished business maybe rayla’s parents were at peace when they died

That is a BIG BOOK what—

OMG SO THE CUBE DOES DO STUFF

I wonder what that book is and where it is now

“There is proof. A witness… Anak Arao”

Are you telling me that a little child got arrested for breaking the flow of the universe because a fuckass dragon saw her FLOATING R O C K S in front of a human—

wait if leola gave PRIMAL magic to humans (cuz dark magic didn't exist at the time) is that why callum can do magic???

“If you so choose, you may die alongside your daughter.”

ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME

WHAT KIND OF MERCY IS THAT

“It was rescued? By who?”

“Me.”

Bro she waited so long to say that lol—

“We love you, Rayla.”

I’m glad she decided to let her parents go

That way they can stay together instead of ripping one of them from death and having them spend the rest of their life without the other

And it’s also like does she choose mom or dad yk this way she doesn’t have to make that choice

“There’s nothing to fear. Close your eyes.”

OMG STOP this shit is wild

I feel so bad for aaravos this is not okay—

he was such a good father he's a completely different person now

istg the dad's in this show L O V E their daughters ugh

THEY FUCKING ATOMIZED HER

NOOOOOOOOOO

Oh look the star on his chest is black and upside down now

So he became the “fallen star” because of Leola’s death

FUCK OFF MERCIFUL ONE

Nah that line official kicked off his villain arc that’s for sure

“Ethari.”

AWWWW STOPPPPPP

The cheezy romance in this show is top tier ugh—

“I’m your daughter.”

GAWD THAT WAS CLOSE

Yuhhh tiadrin and lain were together but ethari’s all alone he needs his husband back 😭

Runaan isn’t done with xadia he wasn’t supposed to die I bet that’s why he was that angry phantom thingy

“He isn’t doing anything for love, he’s doing it for revenge.”

YES TERRY talk her down

Even thought aaravos has EVERY RIGHT to get revenge on those fuckers

YAYY RUNAAN’S BACK

What’s up with the coin why’s callum examining it like that

“Is that…Katolis?”

OOP he found out—

OMG EZRAN FOUND OUT TOO

welp time for the brothers to spiral together in to self-deprecation and blame—

Aaravos getting his anime-girl transformation

Omg he’s hERE aaahhhhhhhh

OH MY GOSH HE’S HUGE

WHAT

Why’s he so HUGE now wtf—

He wasn’t that huge in the flashback—

Oooooohhhh my gosh—

Oooooomgggggggggggg the shock factor in this season was C R A Z Y. Aaravos is out and he’s ready to wreak havoc that is def gonna be interesting. I get the feeling Terry’s gonna join Team Zym because he’s not so invested in aaravos’s plans and whatnot and i think he’s gonna wanna try save claudia. Callum is gonna FLIP OUT when he finds out that aaravos is out and he took the candy to the starscraper that’s gonna be bad. And EZRAN TOOO we never see ezran so worked up like we did this season and i’m scared and a little curious to see how he’s gonna be now that katolis is pretty much destroyed. But hey only 3 months until s7 :P

[mekachu04]

26. Cold

Kidd - 17 | Killer - 21 |Heat -22

Tags specifically for this chapter:

Head Injuries again

please seek emergency care for head injures like this!

The helmet is born

brief but repeated vomit

Read at A03 linked above or here below cut

Drabbles from Pocket Jack's KiKi-tober Prompt list

"What's wrong with him?"

House gestured over to where they'd set up an impromptu infirmary; where Heat had apparently marched Killer off to once the heaviest of the fighting had died down. "Dunno. I think he tried to block a pipe with his face."

Kidd groaned; He didn't like to see Killer hurt - but he didn't like to hear Killer had gotten hurt in such a stupid way even more. He stalked over to the little shelter, throwing the door open to find just the two men thankfully.

Killer was seated on the ground, Heat squatting next to him, red stained cloth pressed against his forehead and their first aid supplies lain out next to them. The cloth mask Killer usually wore over his face had been pushed up as an impromptu headband by Heat to hold his bangs back as he picked through the supplies one handed. Heat waved for Kidd to keep his voice down, the Captain only just biting back a jab at Killer's bad luck.

"hmhmmka" He mumbled to Kidd.

He was definitely not okay; any jest's dying on Kidd's lips as Killer tried to stand up to prove he was fine only for all the colour to drain from his face. He was blinking rapidly, and then Kidd and Heat were lowering him back to the ground before he fainted.

"Get the bucket," Heat warned urgently, dropping the bloody rag to pull Killer's hair back suddenly. Kidd handed it off just in time for Killer to hurl into it. It was not the first time, Kidd frowned, as the bucket already had sick in it. "I'm.. gonna go dump this." His nose wrinkled up at it once he took it back from Killer before he spilled it on himself.

"I wouldn't. I don't think he's done yet."

Kidd's frowned deepened; Heat began to stitching up the still bleeding cut along Killer's hair line. Kidd reached out to touch the end of Killer's nose, blood dripping onto his hand.

"This one is bad."

"/This/ one?" Heat looked nervous, "How many concussions has he had?"

Kidd made a /ehh/ noise, checking Killer's pupils, "I'm gonna have to start sending you out with a safety helmet, buddy."

Killer just looked confused. "Imnt 'uty"

"Oh Killer, you so are fucked up right now." Kidd said sympathetically.

"A'mo wel'day." He told Kidd as Heat finished trying off the thread, before giving a pathetic whine and shudder as Heat pulled away. Baffled by the noise, Heat looked over at Kidd who shrugged back.

Tentatively, Heat put his hand back on Killer's forehead and swore, before using both hands to cup his cheeks. Killer closed his eyes and shivered, leaning into his touch.

"He does feel a little chill," Heat warned, and Kidd pulled his jacket off to wrap Killer up in it.

In a show of gratitude, Killer puked on him.

<><><>

He can't help but have a laugh at Killer's expense when he hands the gag-gift over as they wait for permission to dock on the little backwater island; The Victoria Punk is almost bigger then the entire pier and someone on island wants to make sure she's actually going to fit. It's a reasonable enough request with no undertone of malicious intent, so Kidd is content to wait for once.

"You've had a real head for trouble lately," he cackles, as Killer opens the box to study the crudely made safety helmet.

It's just a basic hard hat that Kidd had shaped out of scrap steel, though he'd lowered the back a little more than was standard and didn't bother shaping the brim onto it.

"Shouldn't there be like... padding?" Killer asked, baffling Kidd in that he seemed to be taking it... seriously.

"Wait.. What?"

"I don't think it's going to be useful without some padding to absorb the blow. It's also going to fall right off."

"Are... Are you fucking with me?" Kidd asked; Killer was inspecting the item like he was actually considering wearing it.

He also looked confused by Kidd's comment. "What do you mean?"

"Because I'm fucking with you. This is a joke..." Kidd said slowly, waiting for Killer to drop the act, "Because after your last concussion? I made that joke about sending you out in a helmet?"

Killer looked down at the helmet in confusion, and then looked back up, still lost.

"Which I'm starting to realize... with your concussion, you don't remember any of that..."

".. I'm sorry?"

"Air son muir, don't be fucking sorry!" Kidd went to take the helmet back, feeling a fool, only to catch a look of uncertainty on Killer's face and pulled his hand back slowly. "I... Di.. Do you want me to make you a helmet? Like... an actual helmet?"

Killer floundered for a moment, "...Maybe?"

Kidd held his hand out, and Killer handed the piece to him this time. "So... Padding..." he prompted, turning the metal over.

"Maybe a face plate too?"

A knot tangled up in Kidd's gut. "Like, are you thinking down the center covering the nose or up over the cheeks?"

He almost didn't hear Killer's response, it was so quiet. It shouldn't have surprised him, not after a friendship as long as theirs.

"Anything you want."

If Killer wanted it full coverage, then that's what Kidd would make for him.

[divsere]

Sugar Induced Daydreams

The glass window allows

The morning sun to leak in light.

I make coffee, stir it with a stick-

This caffeine screams to fill my mind.

This sad girl, in the book I’m reading-

(lain on my back, my tummy to the sky);

Her eyes hold a mirror behind.

She goes through men, like chapters,

Follows rituals of “open wide”,

Till she can offer no more, and belts

Out a cry, so deep, no cad would abide,

And so, they leave.

The words on this book, now, dance ablazed-

For familiar tears stream, undiscovered as of yet.

The bitter coffee stings down my throat,

Dissolves in acid as flies roam about.

To counter this impending rot, I toss the book.

I plead and jerk my feet awake,

Glide through the kitchen, like a real babe,

I throw on some cereal, milk then syrup sweet,

Couple apples cut transverse, real neat-

Starry cored, they beg to be worshipped.

So much sugar leaks in daydreams-

Oh, what it must be like-

To be hanged as wet clothes on a line,

To be scrubbed clean of the vile,

To be belonged and needed alive,

To be shimmery more than a night.

The caffeine fueled sugar rush now subsides,

And somehow the sun died, and the moon’s full of life.

A doorbell- in a pip, “open wide”,

And I belt out a cry, so deep, no cad would abide,

And so, he leaves.

[beautifulterriblequeen]

We're getting to close to seeing how Callum and Runaan are going to interact! They both love Rayla, but will they let that outweigh the fact that Runaan killed King Harrow?

Rayla and Callum love each other, but their fathers were on opposite sides of a deadly clash, and one of them didn't survive. It's going to be intense, no matter how it falls out.

But we've seen this particular tangle come up before. And there's a wide range of results so far:

Zym and Ezran are bonded closely and can read each other's thoughts when they want to. But Ez's dad killed Zym's dad, and before that, Zym's dad killed Ez's mom. Yet that doesn't stop them from seeing each other as friends. They don't blame each other for the choices their parents made.

Rayla and Soren have talked through what Viren did to Runaan in TTM - as far as Soren knew and could guess at, which was that Runaan was messily dead dead at Viren's hands. And Rayla was still happy to be his friend, when he showed his true colors. She didn't blame him for what his dad did to hers, even when she still thought Runaan was gone.

These friendly pairings are all about people from the same generation, people who were hurt by or who were not involved in the deaths that occurred.

It's a little different for Claudia and Rayla. They've generally been on opposite sides all along, and we might see some closer context for Rayla and Callum from looking at their situation.

On one hand, they both know that Viren cursed Lain, Tiadrin, and Runaan into coins. There could be plenty of fallout to come from this knowledge on Rayla's part, and maybe even on Claudia's if she gave those coins away when Viren had some kind of plans in mind.

On the other hand, they also both know that Rayla tackled Viren off the Storm Spire, and he died, and it took Claudia two years to fix that.

Just like it's been taking Rayla two years to "fix" Runaan's coin situation (with vengeance, which will probably now shift to rescue instead?)

But when Claudia and Rayla clashed in S4E9, their issues with each other stuck to what they had done, not what their fathers had done.

And though the angst potential is great with Runaan and Callum potentially squaring off and forcing Rayla to choose a side, etc etc, I think there might be one more example to look at first:

Ezran and Rayla.

They've already bonded as children made to carry a heavy burden of responsibility by their fathers, of feeling separate and weird, not fitting in. They both know what it feels like to have a father who takes lives, a warrior who defends his people - and who kills the fathers of other children. And they're still friends. They're very good friends.

I think Callum has every right to be angry at Runaan, when they meet again. I think he will be angry. He's an angry person with a lot of hurt and stress. And that might be how he deals for a while, because I don't know that Rayla or Runaan himself will really be in a position to help smooth things out.

But Ezran could be, possibly more than anyone else. Harrow was his father, too, so he can speak to Callum from a place of true empathy. But Harrow took Avizandum's life and left Zym without his dad, too. Ezran could help Callum see their shared pain from the outside, even when he's angry. Ezran is the King of Katolis - made so by Runaan's attack, in fact. Ezran rules because of Runaan's actions as much as by the good people who rescued him from Viren's cell.

Oh yeah, how about that: Ezran knows what it's like to be locked up by Viren, too.

They were both betrayed by supposed allies, and Viren pounced on the opportunity to lock them both up.

Bringing Runaan back might divide Rayla and Callum for a while, if Callum can't sort through his feelings. But I think Ezran is the key to helping everyone involved move forward.

[leeus-writing]

I Hate you!

The request was for: Enemies to Lovers with Reno? Like the reader is a new Turk and Reno keeps messing with them much to their frustration xD

I Hate You!

He hated you… no he HATED you. Reno tapped his pen repeatedly watching you. No good, goody two shoes! Stuck up boss pleaser. He hated you following the rules to a T, you had no give, you always did what you were told. Something Reno would never agree with. Reno glared at you.

You looked at him and frowned as you came face to face with the glare of death! If looks could kill. Well, you’d have died. You’d have died three times over. Tseng stood up and came around the table.

“I have a task that involves driving out to Junon,” He stated.

“But that takes a few days,” Reno complained.

You puffed up your cheeks. A job was a job, why was he arguing this! Your looks of distain went unnoticed as Tseng explained that both you and Reno would be going as a partners. The shouting that erupted caused you to hide in the kitchen area for a while.

Once things calmed down, Reno stepped around the door frame and glared at you.

“Come on then… lets get movin,” He growled.

You glared back at him and walked off in front towards the car park. There Reno picked up the company car’s keys from an attendant and got in the front. You hesitated, not sure if it was better to sit in the back or front of the car.  You opted for the front but refused to look at him. He too refused to look at you.

For the first leg of the journey, you both were pretty silent. You didn’t even ask what the job was, you didn’t want to even talk to Reno. Slamming the door of your room and hearing him do the same. What was Tseng thinking! You sat down on the bed and threw your shoes on the floor.

Stupid Reno.

~~

It was the second night when things truly became heated.

“WHAT? ONE ROOM?!”

You winced hearing his shouting from outside the hotel. You didn’t hear the person reply but you could tell things weren’t going well when Reno was screaming about it being a double bedroom.

The redheaded man stormed out of the hotel with his mood just as red. You flinched a little as he snapped at you to follow.

“I…I’ll sleep in the bath or something,” You whimpered.

“Don’t be stupid. You’re a grown woman right. Can ya not sleep next to someone or Somin?” He asked voice a little clipped.

You winced, “yes.”

“Well then…” He replied stripping his shirt off.

Laying next to the man was uncomfortable. You lay there as if you’d been lain out on a morgue slab. Reno had curled away from you though you could tell he was still awake.

You wanted to say something, say sorry for irritating him so much. Slowly you rolled over and touched his shoulder. Reno’s turquoise eyes darted looking at you.

“Reno…” You whispered.

He rolled over leaning up on his elbow. You lay back down looking up at him. His hair relaxed a little without the jell in it.

“I… I’m sorry I make you so angry,” You whispered.

He hummed “it’s not that, I get annoyed by your rigid rule following. Do you have ta do everything your told. It’s like ya can’t Relax or somin. Sometimes we have ta brake rules to survive the job.”

“I just don’t want to be fired. I don’t always follow the rules. And I can relax,” You replied shaking your head.

“Oh?” he asked leaning closer to you.

Your heart skipped a beat, and your cheeks went bright red. You pressed a hand to his chest. This was a test, right? He was seeing how far he could push you. Some stupid game of Chicken.

“What rules do ya break then?” he asked lips now inches from your own.

You kissed him, his arms wrapped around your small frame.

~~

You decided that you liked breaking this rule. Reno’s arms were wrapped around your hips as the light shone in the hotel room. Reno slowly woke and kissed your neck.

“Guess you’ve proven ya can relax. What else can I do to corrupt you?” He asked nipping your ear.

“hmm. I think I should still play goody two shoes in the office. Otherwise the paperwork wont get done,” you replied glancing at him over your shoulder.

“God, I hate you,” He snarled flopping back.

You laughed and rolled over, straddling his hips. “No you don’t…” you replied grinning.

He just grinned back.

[jinzouactor]

do you have any Ultimate 5 headcanons you’re really fond of? sorry if you posted these somewhere already, but I’m really fond of them and their fandom is p small these days!

omg right... there was so much good convo floating around back in the day but lemme see

mngs not fucking being ninete-

minegishi getting a pet postclaw. i dont see them having many ways to fill their time, i feel like having something to take care of would be good for them

the thought that minegishi is not very sensitive to other auras and their own was quite weak. before season 3 it was popular thought that their plants WERE their aura unlike other espers. the idea that makes them difficult to read is cool. like having no eyebrows makes their emotions difficult to read lol

i think the 5 of them meet up pretty regularly for drinks postclaw. i think hatori might have been more social than the rest of them and knows a few more people from Claw who weren't in the S5 and tries to get them involved but the rest of the 5 aren't that receptive. Seri has brought Reigen along a couple times. He didn't make a good impression.

Hatori was closest to Serizawa (both joined the S5 most recently) and Minegishi is most comfortable around Shibata (both of them are happy to NOT talk in each other's company). Shimazaki can get along with anyone but is difficult to form genuine connection with.

Hatori was quite eager to room with Minegishi post claw but they (very politely) were not really willing to tolerate that.

oh and the notion of matsuo and minegishi being exes (friend laine's hc) is super funny to me. in the way that there's bad blood around the time of the WD-arc but they're chill after the fall of claw. their friendship would be pretty cool

-> and THAT made me think what if mngs had some involvement in the 7th div e.g. working there before promotion to the super 5 which is pretty interesting ground for character interactions and the nature of claw. but that idea kind of died. still think its cool tho

basically im a fish who cant see the water around them because ive been in headcanonville for so long that i just sort of see it all as "naturally they are this way"

anyway for more then @nie7027 has some pretty fun headcanon posts

[madwomansapologist]

Can I request about Agatha Harkness and how she fall in love the first time she saw R?

another magical girl in town | agatha harkness

Masterlist | Rules | Taglist | Library | More Agatha Harkness | AO3

synopsis: Agatha Harkness has arrived in a new village, looking for a new quiet and peaceful life. Or at least that's what she tells the neighbors. Agatha didn't expect that the perfect boring place she found would decide to burn a witch. Or that the witch wouldn't be her. [1K]

warnings: burning people alive. gn!reader.

ps: it took me some time, but I did it! hope you like it! i'm think I'm on my witchy fase because all I wanna do is write for those kind of characters. she's just a great villain. like she's bad, but she's also a bitch about it and thats perfect of her.

Agatha Harkness is a widow. A gentle, warm woman who almost lost everything when her husband suddenly died. No children, no husband, no family. It was only a question of time until such a young woman decided to move into another village and search for a light in her life.

At least that's what Agatha told them.

"Oh my," Agatha followed the woman's group with big smiles and kind gestures. "I don't think a widow should appear alone on important meetings for our village. I will stay at my house, please go without me. I don't wanna be a burden."

When they weren't looking, Agatha rolled her eyes up.

Her new house is settled way further away from the village's core, Agatha has privacy to study and to practice. That's why she's there. Stronger than ever, Agatha need space and time to evolve. Before running away, Agatha stoled everything from her deceased coven's library.

"We won't be interfering with anything," the leader of the group told her. Agatha can't seem to remember her name. Elizabeth? Sophie? Whatever. "We'll just watch the judgment."

That wasn't new. "Who robbed milk this time?" Agatha won't learn if everyone keeps trying to make her interact with the village's stupid matters.

"Oh, you don't know?" A blonde lady smiled. That's how she think about them: the blonde, the tall brunette, the short brunette, and the leader. "They gonna judge a witch."

But that was new. "A witch?" It took a lot of strength for Agatha not to laugh.

"Exactly," the short brunette said. "That lying maggot. I know honored women shouldn't be talking like that about someone..."

"But you're right. A lying maggot." The leader guided them towards the village's path. Agatha decided to follow them, curious enough to forget about her studies. "I saw the collection of books. The herbs. I've been inside the hut. And their husband died with poison marks."

That's why Agatha haven't even tried to like anyone there. They are so stupid. So blind. Just another person that would be judge without even knowing what a coven is. No one ever suspect that she might be a witch, and Agatha travelled around a lot of villages. They are sightless.

Walking around the village, a lot of groups move towards the trial. Even kids where running towards the streets. Fools. If only they knew about all the times Agatha used them as a guinea pig. Despite knowing there where no other witches there, Agatha didn't stop the women from leading her into the main square.

But hher blase attitude faded away as soon as she saw a stake mounted. Hay and wood adorned it. It scared Agatha. Two weeks ago there was a trial, but they declared the woman not guilty. There wasn't even a stake. They wouldn't burn her anyway, but now...

That made Agatha remember. And she hates when people try to mess with her mind.

They wouldn't burn someone, would they? Are they that blind because of their faith? The witch hunt has little to do with witchcraft itself, it's just a delusion of faith. They believe that people have lain with Satan. Or so they say. As far as she knows, the person who burns is usually someone who bothers others. Someone they would like to disappear. Witch? No, this is about feuds.

The square was crowded, but she could see the figure tied to the stake. Agatha could see the person writhing, could almost feel the rope burning against her skin. She didn't need to imagine it, she just remembered. Trapped in ancient memories, memories that seem like from another life, Agatha didn't even heard what the priests said.

She is not a person. Agatha has no problem admitting this. Agatha is not a good person and doesn't want to be one. Agatha longs for eternal life, full knowledge, comfort and security. Kindness is not needed for this. But this does not mean that Agatha is a cruel beast.

Going against everything she'd done for the last few weeks, Agatha decided to intervene. People of faith? She will let the stake be set on fire, and then will put out the fire. They will think it is an act of their god. A deity showing that there is innocence to be protected.

Heedless of the women, Agatha walked into the crowd. She squeezed, pushed, and with effort managed to move forward. And when she was close enough, she saw you. And suddenly she couldn't do anything.

Agatha is not a good person. She already understood that. She wasn't born to be good and settle for little. Agatha wasn't born to be a person who pleases, who cares, who tries. Agatha is not a good person but you made her wish she was.

No. It's not that. Agatha would like you to think highly of her. That maybe in another situation, another time, you would look at her and think that Agatha is someone you want in your life. Agatha may not be a good person, but she would be good to you.

Then they set fire to the stake. It burned slowly, but the fire spread. Your startled cry shook her to the bone. With the slightest movement of her hand, Agatha doused the fire. The priests would decide that God had forgiven their sin and it would all be over.

But it started burning again.

Agatha did the same incantation, but this time the fire didn't dim. It just swelled and swelled, getting closer to your startled figure. She whispered a spell, but nothing happened. Agatha closed her eyes and tried to look for which rune could stop that, but your scream made her turn her head.

You were burning.

Desperate, Agatha whispered every possible incantation. Nothing happens. You burned. You suffered. Fire covered your body. You were dying and she couldn't do anything.

How could she be so powerful, have stolen power from so many witches, broken all the rules of her coven, and be unable to put out a prdinary fire? Was this divine punishment? Was it some deity punishing?

Someone started to laugh. Agatha's blood boiled. Who dared laugh at such a moment? Who enjoyed the suffering and scourge of an innocent person? She turned around, searching for the fool soul. Who dares to do something like that when someone is dying?

Then the heat subsides. Agatha looked up and saw that the fire had been extinguished. The fire is out. And you where there, no longer tied to the stake, laughing. Alive. Not even soiled by the embers. You looked like nothing happened.

People started screaming. Some runaway, but most couldn't do anything but watch. The priest said something. He fall to his knees. Was he begging you for forgviness? Was he praying to his god? You stopped laughing. You silence lead the crowd.

"It's too late to fix anything", you smiled. And it was so beautiful. Mesmerizing. "Farewell."

A blue cloud spread from you. Slowly, perhaps just to scare even more whoever was there. Those who hadn't run finally began to move. Except Agatha. She recognized the spell. Agatha just watched it spread.

And as the cloud reached the people, they stopped moving. No screams, no pain, no torture besides the fear. The skin hardened, twisted, until it turned to marble.

Agatha could have stopped you. She could have canceled her spell. She could have done so many things. But she didn't want to.

While everyone else was suffering, you took flight. And of course Agatha went right after you.

GENERAL TAGLIST: @suakemi @notanalienindisguiseblink

if you enjoyed, please reblog! i promise it makes a difference ♡

@ madwomansapologist.tumblr.

[queerofthedagger]

hold the fuck UP. for the wip game, you gotta share Breaking Points with the class???

Oh hey you know that one, you almost left the gc over it! good times 🥰 it's the "oh hey you know lancelot does deserve to snap" / merlin actually walks through the veil fic. have a refresher snip <3

Lancelot's heart is an unsteady beast snarling and crying in his chest, and he stares at Arthur, and only sees hatred. Only sees a legacy of scars that he has traced on Merlin's skin a hundred times, sees fear and resignation in tense lines between brows that he could never fully smooth away. Arthur's face is pale and drawn, and his voice wavers when he says, "Of course I knew Merlin. I know you're shocked, but—" "Draw your sword." The words are out before Lancelot recognises the voice as his own, before the voice at the back of his mind that sounds so painfully like Merlin's, has a chance to stop him. His hands shake, from fury or exhaustion or grief, he doesn't know, and he doesn't care, he doesn't. Merlin walked through the veil because a part of him has always loved Arthur more than he loved himself. Merlin walked through the veil and Arthur doesn't even know, all the wonder and miracles, the sacrifices, and he dares— Merlin walked through the veil without a backwards glance, and Arthur is standing across from Lancelot, claiming he ever knew anything. "Lancelot—" Gwaine starts, but it barely registers above the ringing in his ears, passing bells no manservant will ever receive the honour of. "Draw," he says again, and he moves in before anyone else can intervene, before Arthur has even raised his sword fully. He doesn't want to kill him, except for all the ways in which he does, except for how the beast within his chest is yearning for retribution, for blood, something. Someone to pay for how Lancelot keeps holding on to people, keeps losing them anyway. There is no technique to his fight, but Arthur has taught him well, has lain open all his weaknesses and tricks. Arthur has taught him, but Lance has learnt how to wield a sword long before that, and his ears are still ringing, his heart still snarling, and he finds the tip of his sword resting on the hollow of Arthur's throat much sooner than he expected. He will have died for nothing if you do this, a voice whispers at the back of his minds, and his hands are trembling, trembling, trembling, the world already too silent. Arthur is still staring at him with grief he does not deserve to wrap around himself, and Lancelot shifts his stance. He still does not know what he is about to do when two pairs of hands wrap around him, pulling him back. He still does not know what he would have done when they tie his hand. He does remember accusations like poison dripping from his tongue, all the way back to Camelot. He remembers being placed under guard in his chambers. He remembers finding a shirt of Merlin, one of his notebooks. Remembers attacking two guards, three days without sleep and scouring Merlin's books for spells--how to bring someone back, how to kill someone, trying to summon even a spark of magic into his palm like the warmth Merlin used to spin through the room for them. He still does not know what he would have done when the cell door closes behind him, Arthur's face a masquerade of grief and apologies when he says, "Only until you stop threatening my life; I promise."

[fluffskizeu]

Littles

Suara bell tiba-tiba berbunyi di apartemen yang masih sepi suara itu, jam 6 pagi di hari Minggu, belum ada orang yang beraktifitas.

DUG DUG DUG

Mendengar suara itu, si gadis tidak lagi bisa berpura-pura tertidur. Lagipula siapa yang akan tidak sopan menggedor pintu orang lain di pagi hari, khususnya di hari Minggu?!!

Dengan masih mengernyit, mata yang menyipit, perempuan itu meninggalkan hangat dari pelukan kekasihnya, juga selimut tebalnya untuk melihat siapa yang ada di depan.

Perempuan itu justru semakin mengernyit, dari lubang pengintipnya ia melihat kakak perempuannya ada di depan pintu bersama kedua balita kembarnya.

Click

“AUNTIEEEEEE!!!”

Teriakan dari kedua bocah itu seketika memenuhi unit apartement beserta seisi lorongnya, membuat sang ibu buru-buru melangkah masuk, takut-takut mengganggu yang lain.

Keduanya menyerbu paha perempuan itu, karena tingginya yang belum seberapa, tetap semangat menyambut tantenya yang baru bangun tidur.

“Sorry, really need your help. i have to go to the hospital”

Seakan kakaknya bisa menebak apa yang dipikirkannya, anak kembar yang belum mengerti percakapan orang dewasa itu masih asyik bermain dan bercakap dengan mainan yang dibawanya masing-masing.

“Here I already prepared their meals, this-is what you should cook for them, and these are the list they couldn’t eat— you can bill me for the expenses okay? I really need your help sissy, -must go now!”

Bicaranya dengan kecepatan yang membuat adiknya sendiri termenung diam, berusaha mencerna semuanya. Kakak perempuannya menghampiri kedua balitanya dan mengecup pipi mereka masing-masing.

“You both are happy right? I granted your wish to go to Aunt’s house, now mommy gonna go for a while and you guys— don’t be naughty and give your auntie a hard time, alright? Bu-bye”

Lagi-lagi keduanya masih terlihat senang, mengecup balik pipi ibunya sebelum sang ibu meninggalkan mereka di tempat yang masih sedikit asing untuknya.

Click

Perempuan itu mengerjapkan matanya, apa.. yang baru saja terjadi.. tiba-tiba keponakannya berkunjung- atau lebih tepatnya terpaksa berkunjung?

Ia masih terduduk diam di kursi meja makan, menatap ke arah ruang tamu di mana keduanya sedang bercanda dan bermain, sampai tiba-tiba ia lengah dengan pengawasannya.

Salah satu dari gadis kecil itu membuka kamarnya, dan berteriak memanggil saudara kembarnya.

“PLAY HERE!! IT’S COOL IN HERE!!”

Dilanjut dengan tawanya dan kaki kecil itu mendepak lantai berlari dengan semangat, belum sempat dihentikan.

Oh tidak, Chan sedang tertidur di dalam. Hari ini seharusnya jadi hari istirahat Chan, setelah berminggu-minggu tidur di subuh hari dan kembali bekerja di pagi hari.

Bahkan, ia juga tidak tahu kekasihnya suka anak kecil atau tidak. Tidak pernah melihatnya bersinggungan atau berinteraksi dengan anak kecil sebelumnya, membuatnya sedikit tak enak hati kalau kedua keponakannya akan mengganggu.

“Wait guys! You can’t-“

“AUNTIE THERE’S SOMEONE SLEEPING!!”

Gadis itu tambah terbelalak dengan teriakan salah satu dari mereka, buru-buru ia masuk ke dalam kamar melihat pemandangan horror, keponakannya berloncat-loncat di ranjangnya. Bahkan tubuh Chan terlihat ikut sedikit terguncang karena ulah mereka.

“AUNTIEE LOOK WHO IS THIS!!!”

Anak kecil itu menunjuk pria yang perlahan terbangun, menyipitkan matanya berkat gorden yang sudah dibuka lebar oleh salah satu dari mereka. Laki-laki itu mengusap matanya, tubuhnya ikut berguncang dengan dua orang anak kecil terus berlomba-lomba meloncat lebih tinggi di atas kasur.

“Oh my God.. guys guys, come on come here”

Perempuan itu berbisik, yang tentu saja tidak mempengaruhi keduanya. Justru Chan yang memunggunginya tadi berbalik menghadapnya yang ada di pintu, berusaha memanggil kedua gadis kecil itu.

Oh she feels sorry for him

Kamar itu dipenuhi dengan berisik teriakan seru anak kecil, dan tak lama kekasihnya sepenuhnya terbangun. Tampaknya anak kembar itu juga tidak takut dengan pria asing yang sama sekali tidak pernah dikenal mereka.

Malahan keduanya tertawa tergelitik melihat, dengan berani menyentuh rambut keriting Chan, tapi justru malah membuat care takernya panik.

“Why your hair look like this mister?” One of them grab a small part of his curly hair and giggles.

“No baby.. no-no-no.. you can’t touch anyone without their permission okay? What do you say now?”

Tawa kecilnya diinterupsi karena tidak sopan pada pria asing di depannya, matanya membulat merasa bersalah.

“Awe it’s okay hahaha, who are you guys little girls hmm?”

Chan merespon dengan senyum lesung pipinya, tangannya menadah dan ditepuk dengan gadis kecil satunya, menjawab dengan riang.

“I’m Anne! That’s my sister Anna” Also answering on her behalf of her sister.

“I’m Chan”

“They are my nieces, twins. My sister just dropped by, she said she had an urgent, so.. yea”

Kekasihnya sedikit menjelaskan, sementara pria itu menggenggam tangan kecil yang menepuk tangannya tadi.

“Now.. girls come on, don’t bother uncle Chan because he needs to sleep, yea? Let’s go out”

Ajaknya berharap keduanya mengikuti, tapi tidak.

“Why? the sun is up already”

Chan yang mendengar itu malah tertawa kecil, pikiran anak kecil memang terlalu polos.

“It’s okay babe- I’m awake already”

“I’m really..sorry about this. You can just go back to sleep okay?”

“What do you mean? The sun is already up Anne said”

Ketiganya termasuk Chan tertawa serempak, bahkan sempat-sempatnya pria itu memberikan tangannya untuk ditos kedua anak kembar itu.

“Are you guys like mommy and daddy? Mommy and daddy says babe at home too”

Pertanyaan Anna membuat keduanya saling melirik.

“Yeah we are”

Jawab Chan mendahului kekasihnya yang berpikir menyiapkan jawaban.

“Now, what’s for breakfast? Did you guys aready have breakfast? Come on let’s go out”

Entah ia kurang mengenal kekasihnya sendiri, atau situasi yang menurutnya aneh ini sedikit menenangkannya. Bahkan Chan berhasil membawa kedua bocah kecil itu keluar dari kamar, tanpa paksaan atau teriakan.

[plasterdrain]

seoknen — kupu-kupu itu kamu, binar.

"oh, my god. you really so pretty as butterfly, binar." sebuah kalimat yang keluar malam-malam dari seseorang di hadapan binar detik ini juga. memang seperti ini ya rasanya ada kupu-kupu dalam perutnya? tapi yang binar soal ares, pasti memang cowok itu pengen muji saja. atau entahlah, mungkin malam ini keberuntungannya.

should i say thank you, or get down on my knees then take his cock and say thank you? hanya dalam isi kepala kotor dan sebagian lainnya bahwa binar ingin saja. tapi belum apa-apa binar sudah seberisik ini isi kepalanya, bagaimana nanti?

"sorry, gue gak bisa nahan bilang lo cantik."

"thanks?" binar malu, serius, ia tidak tahu harus menghadapi keadaan canggung seperti apa. "serius, makasih."

"okay, sini kunci mobilnya."

"kak. gue gak pernah panggil lo kak ares ya, dari awal."

"no need, sesuka lo aja."

suka.oh, jelas sudah, bukannya terlihat dengan jelas kalau binar memang suka ares. darimana binar bisa biasa kalau jadi seperti ini, kenapa malam ini hangat dan pipinya kepanasan, seakan pendinginnya di bekerja sama sekali. "panas."

"mau gue turunin? nanti lo kedinginan, udah malem soalnya."

"turunin aja."

"okay..." tapi yang ada di antara mereka hanya hembusan nafas, suasana masih teramat canggung, bahkan tidak biasanya seperti ini, apa karena baru pertama kali dalam situasi berdua saja. entahlah. "sorry, buat lo balik ke kampus lagi, malem-malem."

"gapapa, ares."

"you know it sounds cheesy, awalnya gue mau ketemuan sama lo kalau gak ada rapat ini, or anterin lo pulang gitu, gak tau apa yang ada di pikiran gue. tapi, i like you, binar. too fast?"

kadang-kadang binar mencerna semuanya perlahan, sungguh tidak perlu terlalu cepat seperti ini. baru juga memikirkan memang binar suka sedikit dengan ares, tapi bukan seperti ini jawaban yang ia mau. 

"erm, gak kok, gak kecepetan. lagian emang kita nge-date?"

"if you say so..."

"kak, pelan-pelan." belum sanggup menerima informasi secepat ini. mungkin, binar tidak tahu, apalagi ares sekarang yang fokus dengan menatap jalan, memang ares itu tampan, pasti banyak yang suka. termasuk juga binar.

"mobilnya apa gue?"

"lo."

"oh."

"wanna listen to some song? or something? podcast maybe?"

terputar radio yang secara acak bersiaran, jadi teman di antara mereka, jujur, dari awal binar juga inginnya bertemu ares saja, meski apapun yang terjadi di antara mereka. mau canggung seperti ini, lagi pulang mereka baru bertemu, beda dengan di kampus, mungkin saling sapa.

"what do you like?" tanya ares memutus lamunan dalam mobil.

"hm?"

"apa yang lo suka?"

"banyak, soal apa dulu?"

"something you like to do. maybe..."

"masak, gue baru coba baking tapi masih belum bisa, you know baking looks like chemistry, right. dan kadang kalau sepi gue main gitar."

"i can teach you that, maybe we can bake brownies together, nabi. fudgy or cakey?" nabi, kupu-kupu, masih jadi pembahasan ares, dengan cara cowok itu memanggil nama binar.

"supposed to be fudgy, right?"

"sure. i can do that."

"sounds cocky."

"ouch."

"bercanda, kak." perlahan situasi canggung di antara mereka lenyap, masih dalam perjalanan, sebenarnya tidak jauh juga, tapi binar suka, dan ia harap ares juga suka menghabiskan malam bersamanya juga. "lo sukanya apa? suka makan apa? suka dengerin musik apa? terus apa yang lo suka dalam jalani hidup? because sometimes i don't feel like it, jadi tau sisi lain dari orang itu cukup buat gue."

"panjang amat."

"kalo ga mau jawab, ga usah dijawab, res, serius."

"outside, i like to go outside, nyari nafas kali ya, makan... semua makanan dimakan, kecuali durian dan sekawanannya." binar lihat ares mengernyitkan wajah begitu kata durian keluar dari mulutnya. "kalau musik, lagu sedih kali ya, semua lagu sedih gue dengerin, kayak sulung dari kunto. something i like in this life, maybe nge-date dalam mobil sambil jawab apa yang lo suka. simpel, gak buang duit dan tenang."

"stop... being like that. if you don't mean it."

"enak aja, i mean it." sebentar ares melirik wajah binar, barusan ia juga mengatakan binar cantik, lantas mengapa kupu-kupu ini tidak percaya, toh benar, binar secantik sayap kupu-kupu. "terus lo kenapa gak ngerasa gitu?"

mengedikan bahunya. dijawab pun, saat ini binar tidak punya jawaban di antara keduanya. suka atau tidak dengan hidupnya, apapun itu harus ia jalani juga.

"gue rasa, manusia kejebak dalam conscious-nya, and need to be waking up."

"you know being here is not that bad, alive. i fully understand what you mean, even if you don't feel like it, don't ever feel like you are stuck with it, maybe let the flow with it, berenang-berenang terus berenang seperti dory. keep swimming until you find the shore and rest."

"childish."

"i guess we are childish. human are childish." dari sekian malam, kali ini ares ada di saat yang tepat, mungkin kali ini juga malam tidak soal untuk istirahat dan tidur seperti manusia lainnya, bicara, sampai akhirnya mereka baru makan malam. “so if you want to do something you feel like doing, just do it, get through it. let me accompany you, we can have fun together, nabi.”

bagai malam lainnya, mungkin malam ini berbeda karena binar tidak sendirian di rumah, ada ares bersamanya. ada yang datang jadi teman bicara, meski hanya semalam, ada teman untuk binar membicarakan persiapan masakannya. ada ares yang kini mau bertanya soal apa yang ia suka. soal bagaimana cowok itu mau menemaninya sekarang. 

malam ini buat binar merasa lebih baik dari sebelumnya. 

"gue mau siapin bahan-bahannya, sebentar ya, res."

"okay." ares masih ada di dekat binar, biar cowok itu yang langsung mengeksekusi makan malam hari ini, potongan bawang yang disisihkan, lalu telur, tidak lupa juga dengan daun bawang. "lo sering masak?"

"sering. kalau rumah sepi, jadi gue masak makanan buat sendiri."

"oh, gitu."

"hm... iya, udah biasa juga. makanya kadang ditemenin kak cinta. yang tadi gue ceritain."

"oh kalian deket?"

"deket bangettt... udah jadi kakak sendiri, tapi sekarang dia udah punya pacar, jadi gue kadang ngikut bareng pacarnya juga, jadi plus one-nya kak cinta. tapi emang begitu sih, dari dulu." kak cinta, yang sejak dulu jadi teman binar, jadi kakak binar, bisa juga jari orang tua binar, karena semuanya kak cinta ada dalam kehidupan binar. pokoknya sebelum ada cinta yang orang-orang rasakan, kalau binar udah merasakan cinta dari kak cinta lebih dulu. disayang, dipeluk kalau binar takut dengan petir, ditenangkan kalau binar mimpi buruk. dari situ binar kenal soal cinta.

"bertiga?"

"iyalah. masa sendirian, res."

"maksudnya—"

"jadi nyamuknya mereka. emang lo mikir apa?" dengus binar sebel kalau diingat-ingat.

"kagak..."

"well, si milk itu udah otomatis jadi kakak juga."

"lucu banget kalian."

"gak,"

"kok gitu?"

"lagi ngambek."

"kenapa?"

"ga mau ah, males. masa gue cerita..."

"dari tadi yang kita lakuin apaan, kalau bukan ngobrol?"

"iya sih." binar pasrah dengan situasinya, karena dari awal kalau bukan karena ia akan habiskan waktu bersama ares, mungkin kak cinta tidak akan menyuruhnya untuk pulang lebih dulu. "ngambek sama mereka, karena awalnya gue juga hangout sama kak cinta, lo tau 'kan, pas tau lo ngajak gue makan, mereka nyuruh gue jalan bareng sama lo, tapi kita end up di rumah gue, bukan jalan-jalan."

"ohhh..., 'kan sama aja, jadinya berduaan juga."

"cuma mereka nih pinter dikit kek, ngusir adeknya gitu aja. kalau gue diculik gimana?"

"culik sama gue gitu?"

"huum." harusnya binar tutup mulut saja, karena lebih baik diam, daripada dilihat ares seperti ini. sampai cowok itu tidak berhenti menatapnya. "res?" tawa renyah terdengar dalam seisi ruangan.

"lucu? memang lucu. nyebelin banget sih."

"gue mau deh culik lo kalau semanis ini."

"ya, hadapi duo repot dulu. mau gak?" binar menantang ares, melirik tajam cowok yang duduk manis di hadapannya, menghela nafas panjang tapi sekarang fokus untuk beri ares makanan paling sering ia masak, dan berharap cowok itu suka dengan masakannya. "gak berani 'kan?"

"lebih ke gak mau ambil resiko."

"pinter." gumam binar, sambil menata nasi goreng yang biasa ia masak untuk dirinya, kadang juga kak cinta dan kak milk makan malam bersamanya. "ini untuk ares, pake telor setengah mateng 'kan. no salmonella detected because gue pilih telur omega tiga udah dipasteurisasi."

"thank you, madam."

"ga boleh bohong ya."

"iyalah."

"laper banget apa kak?" serius, binar tidak bisa membedakan apa yang ares rasakan, bahkan nasi gorengnya tinggal setengah sebelum tadi mereka tenggelam dalam sunyi lagi, makan, dan memutar star wars : a new hope.

"laper." senyum ares merekah, sambil melihat binar lekat-lekat, "rasanya persis rumah, sehangat itu, enak, gue jadi pengen nambah lagi." mungkin karena simpel, apalagi mereka hanya berduaan di dalam rumah, tanpa hiruk pikuk jalanan yang penuh polusi, saling bertukar kesukaan barusan di mobil, sekarang hanya berdua saja, menunggu makan malam bersama. hidup harusnya semanis ini.

sekali lagi ares mengejutkannya.

"masih ada di dapur..."

"makasih, binar." langkah cepat dari ares, yang kembali balik dengan senyum lebar lalu duduk di sebelahnya.

"serius enak? atau lo gini ga mau nyakitin gue? makanya dihabisin semua biar gue gak makan?"

"seriusan, binar. ini enak, mirip masakan rumah. lo trust issue banget..."

"sebelumnya gak ada yang gue masakin, lo doang. soalnya, makanya gue takut gak enak, buat gue enak belum tentu lidah lo sama 'kan,"

"oh." belum sempat menjawab kalimat binar karena mulut ares penuh dengan nasi goreng buatan binar. "you know, the way to a man's heart is through his stomach."

"haha." apapun yang bisa rasakan, dari saat menelan nasi gorengnya, sekarang melirik ares yang serius dengan makanannya, cowok itu tidak pernah buat binar untuk mengalihkan perhatian. jujur, dari awal memang perhatiannya sudah jatuh pada ares, atau mungkin binar duluan yang jatuh hati. lalu sekarang. mereka berdua, duduk di sofa empuk. "thank you."

"sound flirty, ya?"

binar mengangguk.

"nonton dan makan, jangan lihatin gue, kupu-kupu."

binar yang fokus dengan tontonannya, bersama juga ares yang duduk di sampingnya, perlahan menarik piring kosongnya yang sekarang cowok itu taruh di depan meja. entah apa yang binar rasakan, tapi kepalanya perlahan mendekat ke arah pundak ares dan istirahat di sana.

"thank you, udah habisin makanan yang gue kasih."

"i would love to eat every dish that you make for me."

"okay."

"okay."

malam masih panjang, tapi entah di antara mereka berdua kembali diam dalam kesunyian masing-masing, televisi yang masih memutarkan film jadi teman mereka, nafas binar yang kembali tenang, bahkan sedikit lagi bisa saja tertidur di atas pundak ares.

isi pikiran binar yang berlalu lalang, ares juga masih fokus menonton. "kak."

"hm..."

"ngantuk." membuat binar semakin tenang dan ingin dekat dengan ares di malam ini, mungkin hanya malam ini saja. "kak, what if i am not as pretty as butterfly that you thought about, what if i am the moth. and you got the wrong one."

"you are and always will be beautiful for me, then. i like you the way you are, binar. even a moth or butterfly." 

"lo selalu gini ya?"

"apa?" binar cantik, mengapa harus ares sembunyi-sembunyi sebut binar cantik. “lo cantik, cantik banget… i find you attractive at first, i won’t waste my time to make a move, unless you don’t like me.” 

“gue suka.”

“so we’re both attracted to each other.”

“hm.” sebelum akhirnya binar sadar, memang sikap ares terlalu manis. "dan lo, manis banget sikapnya, gentle, gue tebak, pasti penyayang juga, gak berani bunuh nyamuk, padahal udah digigit sampe bentol-bentol."

"not with my bare hands... pake raket listrik lah."

"nyebelin."

"bener tapi gak juga, kata orang, gue cuek. bener. bener. salah." menjawab semua tebakan yang binar ucapkan barusan, baru sebagian hal yang binar tahu soal ares, sebelum akhirnya mereka berada di ruangan yang sama, pulang bersama, baru kali ini.

"salah satu?"

"hm." jawab ares malas. 

"bagus deh." makin lama binar bisa tertidur bersama ares, "gapapa salah satu, 'kan bukan ujian jadi pacar ares."

"emang lo mau ujiannya gimana?" tanya jenaka yang barusan dibuat dalam pikiran ares. memang benar harus ada cobaan apalagi yang binar lalui nanti.

"emang beneran ada ujian jadi pacar kak ares." 

"ada, buat nabi. ujiannya sebutkan jenis kupu-kupu dan apa perbedaannya."

"yah... gak tau."

"kan, temen kamu semua, binar, harusnya tahu." ucap ares.

"pengen taunya, ares mau jadi pacarku atau gak."

"mau." singkat, jelas, tapi binar belum siap, sama sekali, bahkan hatinya masih terlalu kecil untuk memikul perasaan yang sebesar ini dengan tiba-tiba. lagi pula baru juga bertemu, udah bahas pacaran. tiada hari esok saja.

"KAK, PELAN-PELAN. jangan langsung begini. gak romantis banget lagi ngantuk."

"oh, okay, besok kita cari romantisnya." cari romantisnya, baru ares nanti pacaran dengan romantis.

"mau tidur..."

"selamat tidur, nabi."

[my-thoughts-and-junk]

Okay so axel is still the miner right? Because I like the idea of a rich white 'kid' (aka grown ass man) copying a killer who was a working class man getting revenge against the upper class

But instead of axel being motivated by trauma he's motivated by TJ (who is no longer the owner of the mine's son or the mayor's son btw he's the son of one of the miners who died in the mine disaster) 'stealing' Sarah away from him

Basically I like the idea of Axel escalating from killing sex workers who remind him of Sarah to killing friends and townies who agree with TJ to attempting to kill TJ and Sarah in the mines

Obsessed with how the og my bloody valentine's harry warden was motivated by righteous fury at his superiors who failed him while the remake's harry warden was motivated by selfish self-preservation