#oh god im not going to tag every different book

[literallys-illiteracy]

Project Moon Reading list

this is mt attempt at a comprehensive list of the references in Project Moon Games.

if you have any that arent listed, feel free to share them.

Lobotomy Corporation:

SCP-049 (Plague Doctor) (Speculated)

Portrait of Dorian Grey (Portrait of Another World; Mirror Of Adjustment) (Speculated)

Bible (One Sin and Hundreds of Good Deeds, Plague Doctor, Skin Prophecy, Flesh Idol, Burrowing Heaven, Express Train to Hell, Whitenight, Carmen)

Midsummer Nights Dream (Fariy Festival)

[Radio Station] UVB-76//The Buzzer (1.76Mhz)(Speculated)

Necronomicon//General Lovecraft (Skin Prophecy)

Colour Out of Space (Fragment of the Universe) (speculated; Thematically almost certainly lovecraft inspired)

The Little Match Girl (Scorched Girl)

Beauty and the Beast (Beauty and the Beast)

The Red Shoes (Red Shoes)

The Wonderful Wizard of Oz (Scarecrow searching for wisdom; Warm Hearted Woodsman)

Colour Out of Space (Child of the Galaxy) (speculative)

The Snow Queen (The Snow Queen)

Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer (Rudolta of the Sleigh)

[Opera] Der Freischutz (Der Freischutz)

Snow White and the seven dwarves (Snow White's Apple)

Alarune (Alriune) (speculative)

The Little Prince (Little Prince)

Little Red Riding Hood (Little Red Riding Hooded Mercenary; Big and Will be Bad Wolf)

Three Little Pigs (Big and Will be Bad Wolf)

The Six Swans (Dream of a Black Swan) (Speculative)

[Music] Bethoven's Moonlight Sonata (Il Pianta De La Luna, Silent Orchestra)

[Film] Spirited Away (Mountain of Smiling Bodies) (Design) (Speculative)

Wonderlab specific:

Alice's adventures in wonderland (Red Queen, Hookah Butterfly)

The Wonderful Wizard of Oz (Scaredy Cat and the road home)

The little mermaid (Piscence mermaid)

Midsummer nights dream (Titania)

[Conjecture/Heavy Speculation] Snow Queen or Snow White and the Seven Dwarves (Nobody Is)

Rapunzel (Tangle)

Lady in the Lake (White Lake)

Mythology and Folklore:

[Buddhist] Preta (Clouded Monk)

[Celtic] Faerie (Fairy Festival)

[German] Der Freischutz "The Freeshooter" (Der Freischutz)

[German] Doppelganger "Double Walker" (Nothing There) (thematic)

[German] Nachtkrapp "Night raven" (Big Bird) (Speculative; Personally unconvinced)

[Greek] Stymphalian birds (Punishing Bird) (Speculative)

[Greek] Pygmalion//Galatea (Pygmalion)

[Japanese] Baku (Void Dream)

[Japanese] Jubokko "Tree Child" (Grave of Cherry blossoms)

[Jewish] Kabbalah (Tree of life, Malkuth, Yesod, Netzach, Hod, Tifret, Gevurah, Hesed, Chokma, Binah, Keter, Ayin)

[Jewish] Succubus//Incubus (Porccubus)

[Korean] Urban Legend regarding "Grape Welch Soda" (An Opened Can of Welcheers)

[Norse] Yggdrasil (Parasite Tree) (Speculative: Giant Tree Sap)

[Roman] Justicia // Lady Justice (Judgement Bird)

[Roman] Laetitia (Laetitia)

[Russian]  Zhar-ptitsa "The Firebird" (The Firebird)

--------------

Library of Ruina:

Library of Babel

Do Androids dream of electric sheep? (Thematic, Achievement name)

The Wonderful Wizard of Oz (The Adult Who Tells Lies, Scaredy cat and the road home)

The Marvelous Land of Oz (Ozma)

Town Musicians of Bremen (The Musicians of Bremen)

The Jaunt (WARP trains)

Nosferatu (Nosferatu)

Macbeth ("And then is Heard no more")

[Film] The hour of the wolf (Tanya)

[tarot] The fool (Jester of Nihil)

[poetry] Sky, Wind, Stars, and Poem (SPB&TP mili song) (thematic)

[poetry] Orlando furioso /& Orlando Innamoratto. (Roland and related cast (Argalia, angelica, etc.))

---------------

Limbus Company

The Divine Comedy (Dante & surrounding cast)

The Wings (Yi Sang & co.)

Faust (Faust)

Don Quixote (Don Quixote)

Hell Screen (Ryoshu)

The Stranger//L'etranger//The Outsider (Meursault)

Dream of the red chamber (Hong Lu)

Wuthering Heights (Heathcliff & Co.)

Moby Dick//The Whale (ishmael & Co.)

Crime and Punishment (Rodion & Sonya)

Demian (Sinclair & Co.)

The Odyssey (Outis, Cyclops)

The Metamorphosis (Gregor)

Limbus Company - Minor References:

Peter pan (Smee)

Sherlock Holmes: (Timekilling Time Stage Names)

Scandal in time (Scandal in Bohemia)

A Case of the Gallows (A Case of Identity) (speculative)

The Adventure of three detectives (The Adventure of Three Students)

The White Scarved League (The Red Headed League)

The Clock Tower of Fear (Valley of Fear)

The Final Problem (The Final Problem)

Midsummer night dream (Midwinter Nightmare EGO gift)

The Time Machine (Hubert from TKT) (Speculative)

The Stars (Alfonso and Stephanette)

The Old Man and The Sea (Indigo elder) (Speculative)

Murder on the Orient Express (Murder on the WARP express)

Vampire the Masqurade (Casseti) (Speculative)

The Masque of the Red Death (Casseti) (Speculative)

The one who rules (Stage name "the one who lords") (speculative)

Real People:

League of nine:

Kim Kirim (김기림) (Rim)

Yi Hyoseok (이효석) (Aseah)

Lee Jong-myeong (이종명) (Yurang)

Kim Yu-yeong (김유영) (???/ Unnamed Member)

Chi-Jin Yoo (유치진). Pen name: Dongrang (동랑) (Dongrang)

Cho Yong-man (조용만) (Aneung)

Lee Tae-jun (이태준) (Sang-heo)

Jeong Ji-yong (정지용) (Young-ji)

Lee Mu-young (이무영) (Gap-ryong)

Park Taewon (박태원) (Gubo)

Kim Hae-Gyeong (김해경). Pen name Yi Sang (이상) (Yi Sang)

Park Pal-yang (박팔양) (???/ Unnamed member)

Gim Yujeong (김유정) (Dongbaek)

Kim Hwan-tae (김환태) (Nul-in)

other(s):

Agatha Christi (Grade 1 Fixer Agatha)

Kim Sakkat (Bamboo Hatted Kim)

Alphonse Daudet (Alfonso)

Vergil (Vergillius)

EGO and Abnormalities:

Midsummers Night Dream (Midwinter Nightmare) (EGO gift)

Carmilla (400 roses Anormality) (Carmilla EGO gift)

Metropolis (Resident of Metropolaris) (Speculative)

Snow White and the seven dwarves (Ebony Queen's Apple)

Pride and Predgudice (Spider of Marrige)

Poem of a dying butterfly (no.10 Crows Eye View) (A Dying Butterfly

Rudolph the red nosed Reindeer (Sandolph)

[Religion, Abrahamic religions] (Skin Prophet) (Heavenly Executioners throne) (Sign of Roses) (Heavenly Commanders Throne) (Broken Wings) (ichthys (Headless ichthys))

[Religion, Buddhist] (Ya Śūnyatā Tad Rūpam EGO) (My Form Empties)

[Folklore, Celtic] Faeries (Fairy Long-Legs, Fairy Gentleman, Faelantern)

[Folklore, German] Der Freishutze (Der Freishutze) (Der Fluchshutze)

[Folklore, Korean] The Green Frog (Blubbering Toad)

[Folklore, Korean] Dol hareubang (Wishing Cairn) (Pagoda Veneration)

[acourtofquestions]

No. No, it couldn't have been a dream The escape, Rowan, the ship to Terrasen—

A dream. An illusion. Her escape from him, from Maeve, had been another illusion.

Had she said it? Had she said where the Keys were hidden?

Then a cool, cultured voice purred, "All that training, and this is what becomes of you?" Not real. Arobynn, standing on the other side of the altar, was not real.

"Even Sam held out better than this."

Fenrys snarled.

You could get out of these chains, if you really wanted," Arobynn said, frowning with distaste. "If you really tried."

No, she couldn't, and everything had been a dream, a lie.

"You let yourself remain captive. Because the moment you are free..." Arobynn chuckled. "Then you must offer yourself up, a lamb to slaughter."

Only hearing the King of the Assassins, unseen and unnoted beside her.

"Deep down, you're hoping you'll be here long enough that the young King of Adarlan will pay the price. Deep down, you know you're hiding here, waiting for him to clear the path." Arobynn leaned against the side of the altar, cleaning his nails with a dagger. "Deep down, you know it's not really fair, that those gods picked you. That Elena picked you instead of him. She bought you time to live, yes, but you were still chosen to pay the price. Her price And the gods'?"

Arobynn ran a long-fingered hand down the side of her face. "Do you see what I tried to spare you from all these years? What you might have avoided had you remained Celaena, remained with me?" He smiled. "Do you see, Aelin?"

She could not answer. Had no voice. Cairn hit bone, and—

Aelin lunged upward, hands grasping for her thigh. No chains weighed her. No mask smothered her. No dagger had been twisted into her body. Breathing hard, the scent of musty sheets clinging to her nose, the sounds of her screaming replaced by the drowsy chirping of birds, Aelin scrubbed at her face.

The prince who'd fallen asleep beside her was already running a hand down her back in silent, soothing strokes.

A dream. Just a dream.

She twisted, setting her feet to the threadbare carpet on the uneven wood floor.

"Dawn isn't for another hour," Rowan said.

Yet Aelin reached for her shirt. "I'll get warmed up, then." Maybe run, as she had not been able to do in weeks and weeks.

Rowan sat up, missing nothing. "Training can wait, Aelin." They'd been doing it for weeks now, as thorough and grueling as it had been at Mistward.

She shoved her legs into her pants, then buckled on her sword belt.

"No, it can't."

A gathering storm to the north had forced their ship to find harbor last night—and after weeks at sea, none of them had hesitated to spend a few hours on land. To learn what in hell had happened while they'd been gone.

The answer: war.

Everywhere, war raged. But where the fighting occurred, the aging innkeeper didn't know. Boats didn't stop at the port anymore— and the great warships just sailed past. Whether they were enemy or friendly, he also didn't know.

Aelin scowled. "What." It wasn't so much of a question as demand.

His gaze was unfaltering. As it had been when she'd returned from her run through the misty fields beyond the inn and found him leaning against the apple tree. "That's enough for today."

"We've hardly started." She lifted her blade.

Rowan kept his own lowered. "You barely slept last night."

Aelin tensed. "Bad dreams." An understatement. She lifted her chin and threw him a grin. "Perhaps I'm starting to wear you down a bit."

His canines gleamed. "You need to eat."

"I need to train."

She couldn't stop it-that need to do something. To be in motion.

No matter how many times she swung her blade, she could feel them. The shackles. And whenever she paused to rest, she could feel it, too—her magic. Waiting.

Indeed, it seemed to open an eye and yawn.

She clenched her jaw, and attacked again Rowan met each blow, and she knew her maneuvers were descending into sloppiness.

Knew he let her continue rather than seizing the many openings to end it.

She couldn't stop. War raged around them People were dying. And she had been locked in that damned box, had been taken apart again and again, unable to do anything.

Rowan struck, so fast she couldn't track it. But it was the foot he slid before her own that doomed her, sending her careening into the dirt.

"I win," he panted. "Let's eat."

Aelin glared up at him. "Another round."

Rowan just sheathed his sword. "After breakfast."

She growled. He growled right back.

"Don't be stupid," he said. "You'll lose all that muscle if you don't feed your body. So eat. And if you still want to train afterward, I'll train with you." He offered her a tattooed hand.

But Aelin said, "People are dying. In Terrasen. In-everywhere. People are dying, Rowan."

"Your eating breakfast isn't going to change that." Her lips curled in a snarl, but he cut her off. "I know people are dying. We are going to help them. But you need to have some strength left, or you won't be able to."

Truth. Her mate spoke truth. And yet she could see them, hear them. Those dying, frightened people. Whose screams so often sounded like her own.

Rowan wriggled his fingers in silent reminder. Shall we?

Aelin scowled and took his hand, letting him haul her to her feet. So pushy.

Rowan slid an arm around her shoulders. That's the most polite thing you've ever said about me.

Elide's eyes widened. Widened further as he opened his mouth, and took a bite. His swallow was audible. His cringe barely contained. Elide reined in her smile at the pure misery that entered the Lion's tawny stare. Aelin and Rowan had been finishing up a similar battle when she'd entered the taproom minutes ago, the queen wishing her luck before striding back into the courtyard.

Elide hadn't seen her sit still for longer than it took to eat a meal. Or during the hours when she'd instructed them in Wyrdmarks, after Rowan had requested she teach them.

It had gotten her out of the chains, the prince had explained. And if the ilken were resistant to their magic, then learning the ancient marks would come in handy with all they faced ahead. The battles both physical and magic.

Gavriel met her stare, and Elide again restrained her laugh.

She felt, rather than saw, Lorcan enter. The innkeeper instantly found somewhere else to be. The man hadn't been surprised to see five Fae enter his inn last night, so his vanishing whenever Lorcan appeared was certainly due to the glower the male had perfected.

Indeed, Lorcan took one look at Elide and Gavriel and left the dining room.

They'd barely spoken these weeks. Elide hadn't known what to even say. A member of this court. Her court. Forever.

He and Aelin certainly hadn't warmed toward each other. No, only Rowan and Gavriel really spoke to him. Fenrys, despite his promise to Aelin not to fight with Lorcan, ignored him most of the time. And Elide ... She'd made herself scarce often enough that Lorcan hadn't bothered to approach her.

Good. It was good. Even if she sometimes found herself opening her mouth to speak to him. Watching him as he listened to Aelin's lessons on the Wyrdmarks. Or while he trained with the queen, the rare moments when the two of them weren't at each other's throats.

Aelin had been returned to them. Was recovering as best she could.

Elide didn't taste her next bite of porridge. Gavriel, thankfully, said nothing. And Anneith didn't speak, either. Not a whisper of guidance. It was better that way. To listen to herself. Better that Lorcan kept his distance, too.

Whether the others knew what propelled her, they hadn't said a word. Aelin sheathed Goldryn and loosed a long breath. Deep down, her power grumbled. She flexed her fingers. Maeve's cold, pale face flashed before her eyes. Her magic went silent.

Fenrys sat in wolf form at the edge of the nearest field, staring out across the expanse.

Precisely where he'd been before dawn.

She let him hear her steps, his ears twitching. He shifted as she approached, and leaned against the half-rotted fence surrounding the field.

"Who'd you piss off to get the graveyard shift?" Aelin asked, wiping the sweat from her brow.

Fenrys snorted and ran a hand through his hair. "Would you believe I volunteered for it?" She arched a brow. He shrugged, watching the field again, the mists still clinging to its farthest reaches. "I don't sleep well these days." He cut her a sidelong glance. "I don't suppose I'm the only one."

She picked at the blister on her right hand, hissing. "We could start a secret society-for people who don't sleep well."

"As long as Lorcan isn't invited, I'm in."

Aelin huffed a laugh. "Let it go."

His face turned stony. "I said I would."

"You clearly haven't."

"I'll let it go when you stop running yourself ragged at dawn."

"I'm not running myself ragged. Rowan is overseeing it."

"Rowan is the only reason you're not limping everywhere."

Truth. Aelin curled her aching hands into fists and slid them into her pockets. Fenrys said nothing didn't ask why she didn't warm her fingers. Or the air around them. He just turned to her and blinked three times. Are you all right?

A gull's cry pierced the gray world, and Aelin blinked back twice. No. It was as much as she'd admit. She blinked again, thrice now. Are you all right?

Two blinks from him, too. No,

They were not alright.

They might never be. If the others knew, if they saw past the swagger and temper, they didn't let on.

None of them commented that Fenrys hadn't once used his magic to leap between places. Not that there was anywhere to go in the middle of the sea. But even when they sparred, he didn't wield it. Perhaps it had died with Connall. Perhaps it had been a gift they had both shared, and touching it was unbearable.

She didn't dare peer inward, to the churning sea inside her. Couldn't.

Aelin and Fenrys stood by the field as the sun arced higher, burning off the mists.

Aelin shook her head. Another dream, or hallucination. "If she's on our heels with this army, I'm just ... trying to understand it. Her, I mean."

"You plan to kill her." The gruel in her stomach turned over, but Aelin shrugged. Even as she tasted ash on her tongue.

"Would you prefer to do it?"

"I'm not sure I'd survive it," he said through his teeth. "And you have more of a reason to claim it than I do."

"I'd say we have an equal claim."

His dark eyes roved over her face. "Connall was a better male than—than how you saw him that time. Than what he was in the end."

She gripped his hand and squeezed. "I know."

The last of the mists vanished. Fenrys asked quietly, "Do you want me to tell you about it?" He didn't mean his brother.

She shook her head. "I know enough." She surveyed her cold, blistered hands. "I know enough," she repeated.

[fanaticsnail]

Snail important question;

Of any line-up of characters of your choice-

Who do you think is attracted to competency,

Who is attracted to stupidity,

Who can go either way,

And who is attracted to both at the same time (imagine;

Reader: sorry I'm late I had to fight off two different ships

Them: is that how you got that bruise on your face?

Reader: oh... Actually, I wasn't looking and pulled a push door off its' hinges into my face

Them, kicking off their pants: god you're so fucking stupid, sit on my face

)

Also, I feel like there are different versions of competency and stupidity. Street smarts vs social obliviousness. Book smarts vs functionally illiterate. Strategic/battle smarts vs what-do-you-mean-flashing-the-enemy-isn't-a-valid-distraction?

(Zoro is completely math smart and dumb in every other way)

I could imagine Luffy would be attracted to hyper specific competency. If you're really into a specific thing and good at it and it's your dream he would absolutely love it even if it sounds like you're speaking gibberish to him. He wouldn't even think of it as weird - I mean, no more weird than any other dream he doesn't personally understand - he's certainly not the type to judge based on societal norms. You could talk his ear off about the reproductive habits of different animals and he wouldn't get why everyone else doesn't like to hear it when they're eating but hey more food for him.

Snail. Your asks always know how to get the better of me. Have a series of little drabbles, dear.

Competency, Stupidity, Duality

Masterlist here

Word Count: 410+, 510+, 580+

Synopsis: They can't help what attracted them to you. No matter what you did, they simply couldn't get enough of you. Their emotions finally catch up with them, and they confess their adoration for you.

Themes: variety x gn!reader, feelings, injury, mentions of battles, finally giving in, all different 'reader' inserts, confessions of love, kid x reader, zoro x reader, killer x reader, angst, fluff, sweetness.

Notes: I wasn't expecting to write this today, but I've been thinking about the big boys lately and I needed to give them some love. Something about trios lately.

Tag List: @sordidmusings @nerium-lil @feral-artistry @since-im-already-here @writingmysanity @indydonuts @gingernut1314 @i-am-vita @carrotsunshine @mfreedomstuff @daydreamer-in-training

Competency: Eustass Kid

When Eustass Kid noticed how quick and sharp you were to react in life or death circumstances, he was immediately smitten with you. Being a Straw-Hat, your ambitions and dreams were fostered by your playful captain as you sailed aboard the Thousand Sunny. Your ability to interact flawlessly by balancing the combined efforts of the three crews had him intrigued by your charisma. 

Fighting by your side was something he didn’t expect to affect him so much. The way you researched the strengths and weaknesses of all three crews sailing and fighting together was admirable. Asserting yourself by asking Law to push and pull you closer to the fight with the Ope-Ope no Mi ability, while fighting side-by-side with Massacre Soldier Killer in close quarters, had him left wordless.

After the battle finishes, he watched as you hastily aided your crew of their injuries while disregarding your own; putting others first while adding pressure to your hand-gash, hovering it over your head to slow the bleeding. He couldn’t get enough of you. 

He needed you to know how he felt about you, but being in the presence of Luffy and Law always seemed to bring out the more juvenile side of attitude. His simple attraction and infatuation with you had to be revealed to you in due time, but he couldn’t risk sounding like an idiot in front of you. He would have to simply wait until you were alone and unoccupied before he made his move to take care of you after taking care of others. 

Slowly approaching you as you sat down against the tangerine grove aboard the Thousand Sunny, his shadow shrouded your form and prompted you to gaze up into his scarred, sheepish face. Your smile caused his heart to beat harder and his head to swirl with a variety of "what-ifs". Gulping back his insecurities, he knelt down in front of you.

“Let me take care of that for you,” he offered with a soft smirk, “You’ve done so much for others, and I think your hand needs some seeing to.” 

“If you say so, Captain Kid,” you shrug, offering your injured hand delicately to him and listening to his every instruction as he treats you, “I wasn’t aware you had any medical training.” He straps your hand in a bandage, placing down the final ties before holding your injured hand in his.

“I don’t,” he shrugged with a smile atop his painted lips, “But I’ve lost an arm before, and I don’t want to see that happen to you.” 

“You’re-...” he stuttered over his words, gazing at your hand before softly drifting his tired eyes up, “...-You amaze me. Truly, amaze me.” You place your other hand on his, never once removing your eyes from his face as he offers you such kindness. 

“Thank you, sir,” you nod to him with a soft smile, “You amaze me, too.”

Stupidity: Roronoa Zoro

“Why would you do that?” Zoro roared at you, hovering his body over yours and caging your face-down body within a shield of his own. The gashes on your back were deep, your body weeping out the red essence and staining your clothes with it.

“C-Couldn’t risk yours,” you stuttered out with a soft smile, “H’was gonna g-get yours. Didn’t want you to wear the shame.” His eyes widened, filling with a steam of glossy tears that threatened to spill over the moment you stuttered out your confession. “That’s what you said, wasn’t it? Mark on the back is a swordsman’s greatest shame?” 

Drip. 

Drip.

Drip.

One after one, soft tears spilt down his cheeks and mixed with the fluids pooling at your back. He leaned down towards you, the heat of battle dying down with the swift, flaming kick of the blonde cook and giggling chuckles of your captain, Luffy. 

“You’re a fucking idiot,” he sniffed his sobs back as he leaned down to cage you, “Can’t you see? None of that fucking matters without you here.” He softly, tenderly moved you from your position on the floor to not disturb your wounds. He sat you up, cradling you against his broad chest and openly sobbed for you. 

“When you get better,” he growled into your shoulder, “I will repay you for this. I will pay my debt to you.” His sobs got more desperate, not halting in the slightest when Trafalgar D Water-Law approached the two of you in your embrace. 

“Let me get ‘em to the infirmary,” Law offered, gesturing for Bepo to ready the aid kit, “I’ll treat the wounds there-.” 

“-I won’t leave them,” Zoro barked over your shoulder, your soft smile tugging at your cheeks in your hazy daze. “Let me go with you, Traffy. I won’t say a damn word to distract you, on my honor.” Law nods, raising his hand and spreading his fingers and offers the two words to switch positions within the infirmary: “Room, Shambles.” 

As you drifted in and out of consciousness, you laughed each time Zoro chastised you for your stupidity. Echos of: “There were so many other things you could’ve done instead,” and “You stumbled into that blade like a moron and took that hit for me, idiot.” You giggled through the pain, barely feeling it as Law worked to stitch you together again. 

Upon regaining consciousness, you looked to your moss-haired crewmate and offered out your hand to his bicep. His head was bowed, arms crossed over his chest, and was assumed to be napping by your bedside. Feeling your touch, he was roused from his sleep and immediately leaned forward to bring his face beside yours. 

“You’re a fucking moron,” he huffed, smiling in a melancholy grin. You laughed at his insult, squeezing his muscle before retracting your hand. As you nearly drew it away to your side, he caught your hand and brought your palm up to his lips. 

“My fucking moron,” he confirmed, placing a soft kiss to your palm before using it to cup his face. “I love you.”

Duality: Massacre Soldier Killer

Staring up into your face while remaining silent, resting his masked face on the heel of his palm, he listened to your recount of a very specific childhood injury that left you with an interesting scar on your thigh. Killer’s eyes never left your face, his cheeks beginning to glow warm and vibrant beneath the shroud of his mask.

“So, let me get this straight,” Captain Eustass Kid held his hand in front of his face and gave it a gentle wave to halt your words, “That sick-looking scar wasn’t from any time you served with Luffy, but because you set off a fucking harpoon and speared yourself in the leg with it?” 

Killer felt himself swoon at the melody your laugh thrust into the atmosphere. He was ever thankful his blue and white mask disguised how much he was smiling beneath the shroud. 

“Yep,” you popped the ‘P’ afterwards, nodding in confirmation as you sat beside Usopp and drew your tankard up to your lips, “But I learnt from it, and it hasn’t happened since.” Killer sighed, his voice almost coming out in a soft moan to reveal his growing infatuation for you. Kid barked out a harsh gaggle of laughter, clapping you on the shoulder with his right hand and gestured for you to reveal it to them.

“Let me see it again, go on,” he chuckled, removing his hand and sitting back on his seat, “Use Killer’s thigh as a prop so we can see it properly. You don’t mind do you, big guy?” Killer absentmindedly and slowly shook his head, tapping his thigh twice with his hand for you to reveal your injury to the captain of the Victoria Punk, himself and your crewmate beside you. 

“Alright,” you shrugged, standing beside Usopp and Killer and gently placed your foot atop Killer’s thigh and began hiking up your shorts to your hip, “Feast your eyes, Captain.” Sure enough, an interesting looking scar was revealed on your inner thigh, clear as day and sure as the sea is salty. 

“Oh, fucking hells!” Kid gave you a hearty laugh, “You seeing this, big guy?” Kid turned his attention to his first mate, his smile only growing as he noticed the angle of Killer’s mask never left your face. Surprise was immediately thrust into Kid’s eyes, noticing the unwavering resolve in Killer’s posture. 

You turned your attention down to the silent and broody first-mate, your face puzzled and eyes searching his mask for any further thought or action. He slowly drew his hands up to clasp around your ankle and calf, holding it firmly as he leaned forward. 

“You’re perfect,” he offered in a breathy whisper, stroking your leg and gazing lovingly into your face, “Don’t let anyone ever tell you otherwise.” 

Your face flushed with a warmth at his words, eyes widening and looking down at his large hands as they held you so tenderly and delicately within his grasp. Smiling, you leaned forwards and placed your hand over his scarred left forearm with mischief in your eyes, asking him a simple question with a suggestive tone. 

“Like what you see then, big guy?” At your question, Usopp nearly choked on his drink. You had never been this bold before, and this came as a shock to your crew’s skilled sniper. He covered his choking with a soft cough, turning away with a downturned smile and stifling his growing laugh. 

“So much,” Killer confirmed, gently caressing your calf and looking up at you through half-hooded blonde lashes beneath his mask, “So, so much.”

[beybaldes]

one single thread of gold tied me to you

sejanus plinth x gn!reader

masterlist

summary: Sejanus Plinth sits on the steps of the academy with you by his side. Things may be bad, but there are worse places you could be

warnings: NO relation between reader and snow I might die if I see another fic where reader is his twin (not that they aren’t good fics, they are so good!!! I just don’t look like him at all 😭😭😭 free me), little angst but mostly fluff, ONE use of y/n, hehehehehe i posses evil powers

an: okay I know Ive not posted in like forever but I saw BOSBAS and fell in LOVE 🥲 technically spoilers and won’t be 100% book/movie accurate im going with straight vibes for this one :D enjoy!!

Sejanus Plinth was never meant to cross your path, let alone take violent root in your heart. In every other universe he never left district two and you never bumped into him on the playground at 8 years old, wondering where on earth he must have come from. There wasn’t such a thing as a ‘new kid’ in the capital, and yet, you had found one.

Or rather, he’d found you. You’d been chasing Arachne Crane around the playground in a game of tag, too focused on trying to catch her and not focused enough on the tree root that stuck out of the ground in front of you. There’d been no time to react, but sweet, gentle, wonderful Sejanus Plinth had caught you by the arm, his grip so firm you’d had his fingerprints bruised into your skin for weeks after. But he’d saved you from scraping your knee against the ground, and he held you up until you’d steadied yourself, and then he’d walked away without a word. Arachne had disappeared from your sight and you were suddenly infatuated with the mass of brown curls that were walking to the far side of the playground; you felt as though you had no choice but to chase after him instead.

Shivering at the thought that in another life you’d befriended the likes of Felix Ravenstill or Festus Creed instead, you reached out for Sejanus’s hand between the tables the mentors were made to sit at to watch the games. Surprisingly, he was receptive to your touch, tightly interlocking your fingers and hoping it would provide him with more comfort then you both knew it ever could.

As Lucretius "Lucky" Flickerman, the capitals weatherman, began to introduce the game to viewers watching from the comfort of their homes, Sejanus’s grip on your hand only got tighter, his hands beginning to tremble slightly as the screen at the front of the grand room began to show the tributes entering the area. As images of the tributes being pushed, dragged and shoved into their starting places crossed the screen, your thumb ran across the back of his hand, hoping you could make the shaking of his clammy palm against yours stop.

Slowly the cameras in the arena moved their focus from the tributes waiting for the games to start, and instead zoomed in on Marcus, hung by his bloodied hands on the fallen debris caused by the rebel attack.

“Oh my God.” Gasping the words out, you couldn’t tear your eyes from the sight, and you would’ve held onto Sejanus’s hand tighter if you were still holding it. Instead his hand was torn from yours as he stood among the other mentors, flinging his desk and device across the room with a rage you’d never seen in him before.

“You’re monsters!” He cried, hands scrunched into fists by his side, tears filling his eyes as he addressed the room before him. Peers, Sejanus didn’t dare call them friends, and teachers alike stood in silence, refusing to feed into his outrage and refusing to speak against the regime they had been raised in. Though some of them had never known anything different then a life with the hunger games, it didn’t take anything more then a heart in your chest to know how wrong it was. Even if Sejanus hadn’t known Marcus from his time in district 2, he was the same age as him, he had a family and friends back home hoping he would return to them, he was a living, breathing person who shouldn’t have had to fight for his life because his name was drawn from a hat. “All of you!”

Sejanus stormed out of the room, and you would’ve been hot on his heels if Coriolanus hadn’t grabbed you, holding you to your seat. “Just wait.” You didn’t understand at first, furious that Coriolanus would try and stop you from going after Sejanus to see if he was okay, but as he silently pointed at Mr Flickerman, you understood. Following Sejanus should wait ten seconds while Lucky counted down to the official beginning of the Hunger games and you could sneak away unnoticed. While you were never particularly fond of Coriolanus Snow, you could appreciate his brain and how it ticked.

When the ten long seconds were finally up, you sprung from your seat, a whispered thank you to Coriolanus as you snuck around the outside of the seated mentors, all of whom were enamoured with the screen. As you left the building in search of Sejanus, you briefly worried he’d be nowhere to be found, having run far away from the academy in hope he could escape everything. However, he’d been quite easy to find, hunched over himself on the steps of the academy, his arms wrapped around his knees and curled into himself as his shoulders jumped with strained breaths. A part of you prayed you’d never have to see him like this again.

“Sejanus?” His head snapped to face you, furiously wiping away the frustrated tears that had rolled down his cheeks and forcing something that tried to be a smile on his face. A frown pulled on your lips as your met his eyes, quickly crossing the steps until you were beside him. “Oh, Sejanus.”

“Did you see what they did to him?” His voice trembled as he spoke, hiccuping in breathes as he tried to tell you what he was thinking, tried to nullify the crippling ache in his chest. With the escape of a whimper from the back of his throat, your hands came to cup his face, caressing his cheeks and simultaneously wiping away any tears that crossed your path. “What they’re doing to all of them?”

“I know, I know.” You cooed, knowing there was nothing you could do to change things. All you could do right now was make your Sejanus feel better, though you worried even your best wouldn’t be enough. “It is wrong and cruel, so, so cruel, and one day people will see just how right you are.”

“They won’t.” He scoffed, his eyes turning to stare at where his shoes met the ground, avoiding your gaze. “They think that this is life, that this is how things are. And no one else sees an issue with that, at least not here in the Capital.”

One of your hands turned Sejanus to face you, not allowing him to look away as you spoke, while the other fervently soothed his curls away from his face, hoping a combination of the two could begin to make him feel better.

“Thousands of people will have seen your outrage at the games tonight, and if even one of them has been affected by it, then you will have made a change.” Sejanus’s features softened as you spoke, and while you knew his boiling rage was only reducing to a simmer, and that at the end of the day it would still be inside of him, you knew that he was allowing himself to get through this moment with your help. “Rome was not built in one night. Change will come, it just takes time.”

Silence didn’t have the chance to settle. “Why are you so nice to me?” That surprised you. It didn’t seem like a question that needed answering and it didn’t seem like something Sejanus would ever ask you. It felt too obvious. “No one in the capital has ever accepted me as one of them, and yet, my own district won’t recognise me as theirs either. Most of the people at the academy don’t even acknowledge me, and sometimes I feel like Coryo only tolerates me, but you? You are nice to me, like now. You didn’t have to come out here, you chose to. Why?”

Strangely, you’d never been so scared. You couldn’t help but think that you’d said or done something to make Sejanus think that your friendship towards him was fake or conditional, but it couldn’t be further from it. How did you put into words how much you loved him for him, without saying it just like that? Plain and simple?

“You are kind, Sejanus. You don’t see a lot of that around here. From the very first day I met you you have been nothing but kind - not only to me but everyone around you, even when they didn’t deserve it.” Your hand against his hair had moved back down to his cheek, the gentle caress of your thumb against the apple of his cheek turning more and more loving with every word you spoke. “You bring your Ma’s sweets to share, even when they’re the ones you really like, you recite your favourite books to me just because you want to talk and you know I’ll listen, you stop me from going home with scrapped knees and grazed hands everyday, and-“

It was like you’d suddenly become dangerously aware of how close the two of you had got, not only physically on the steps of the academy, but in your friendship over the years. Maybe more then a friendship if either of you were brave enough to say it. You couldn’t breathe and you couldn’t think about anything but his lips against yours. Removing your hands from his face and placing them neatly in your lap, you tore your gaze from his face and looked to the sunsetting sky. “Sejanus plinth, it seems I have grown quite fond of you.”

Sejanus placed two fingers beneath your chin, turning your face to make you look at him, like you had done just minutes ago. “I have grown irreversibly fond of you, y/n y/l/n.”

As Sejanus leaned closer to you, and you tilted you head so your nose would slot perfectly against his, a crowd of mentors came out of the academy, causing the two of you to jump apart. Sejanus looked more disappointed than you think you’d be able to get him to admit, and he stood from the steps almost instantly. “I have to go.”

If you’d been any less dazed by the almost kiss shared between the two of you, you’d have chased after him once more, but you found yourself frozen on the steps of the academy. Sejanus was going to kiss you. Maybe, if you were lucky, you’d find the two of you in such a position once again and maybe that time your lips would actually meet.

A part of you is certain you don’t even know the boy exists in any other universe. And yet, you find that you would plead before the Gods themselves to have the fortune of knowing him in every one.

An: thank you for reading!! Would anyone want a part 2 about Sejanus going in to the arena and reader and Coriolanus teaming up to get him out? I might write it anyway lol but please give me feed back and let me know what you thought!! Mwah <333

part 2: I swam a lake of fire, I’d have walked across the floor of any sea out now!!

[mitchasaurus-r3x]

Spoilers for all of tma :p

I had a tma time travel fic idea that basically goes like Jon gets sent back in time after mag200 and doesn’t find Martin, so he ditches the institute immediately and goes to current timeline Martin in his flat and Martin being the lovely, too kind man he is is like “OH MY GOD” and future jon is like “HEYY LISTEN IM FROM THE FUTURE AND YOU NEED TO DO THESE THINGS IF YOU WANT YOUR FRIENDS TO LIVE AND IM MOURNING BUT IM AWFUL AT FEELINGS SO IM PROJECTING MY LOVE AND CARE I SHOWED MY MARTIN ON U” and current Martin goes “ok.” So NOW what happens is Martin does stuff with future Jon’s advice, and current Tim and Sasha are so confused and suspicious but oddly enough current Jon isn’t? Instead he’s more kind and friendly to everyone, even Martin (only by a smidgen, he’s not that great)! But Martin is too caught up in whatever future Jon is saying will happen in the future, so he doesn’t quite notice.

Then eventually, the Vittery statement comes in, and Jon assigns it to Martin. Martin tells future Jon of this and he goes “NOOO NONO NOPE tell ur Jon to drop the case immediately , and do not go investigate.” So Martin calls up current Jon with his phone on speaker so future Jon can listen and current Jon is… surprisingly understanding? Like he just sort of, drops the case as soon as Martin mentions it. Actually, he says that he was planning on calling Martin to TELL him to drop it.

Which, is wierd.

Future Jon never remembers even thinking about asking Martin to drop the case, but maybe with Martin changing the timeline already he’s softening up quicker? Well whatever it is, good, Martin is off the case and hopefully will never need to ever meet Jane Prentiss or be so so lonely in his flat. But future Jon has a job to do, he still needs to eliminate Prentiss, and luckily he still has some residual Archivist powers. Not as powerful as in the apocalypse, but maybe alright for one more smiting (he decided to kill Jonah in a different way, preferably taking out his real body in the Panopticon). So he sneaks down to Vittery’s flat in the dead of night, not before telling Martin where he was going (Jon is all about communication now, he WILL make it up to this Martin, he WILL be better). He makes it down and plans to duck into the basement with the same window but… there’s someone(thing?) hunched over the basement window. Jon immediately goes Archivist mode, stalking up to this figure and … wait.

Martin?

No, he shouldn’t be here. Jon TOLD HIM to stay out of this, how dangerous this would be. In a sudden flash of anger he grabs Martin’s shoulder, ready to cuss the man out, and he whips around armed with… a fire extinguisher? And his hair is longer, and his stubble is gruffer, and his eyes are washed out and it’s… it’s his Martin. His Martin wielding a fire extinguisher at his chest, in an old band shirt, and smelling like old books and dust.

They kiss right there on the street, fire extinguisher squeezed between them, certain of crawling worms just inside that window ready to eat their flesh, but they kiss right there and everything is ok because somehow Martin made it here alive, and he didn’t find Jon in the Panopticon so he ditched in tears and went to the only place he could stand. Current Jon had stared at him, pissed, confused, worried, every combination of emotions but he let Martin stay, and Martin told him how to save his friends, to stop taking live statements, to keep the archives in chaos, and to make sure current Martin never goes to Vittery’s flat. And uhhh yeah they kill Jonah somehow and it’s one more for the everyone lives/nobody dies tag!

[isdalinarhot]

on the state of kholin haterism on tumblr

this is gonna be a long one, so bear with me.

one thing i think that has changed in the tumblr fandom in the three years that ive been in it is that the culture in 2021 was ALSO at a largely anti-Kholin sentiment, but there were two key differences.

the first is that most people making critiques of such characters would use the tag #kholin critical, which was useful either if you were sensitive to criticism of one of the kholins for whatever reason AND if you wanted to read analysis of some of their faults by many different users under one tag.

the second is that said kholin critical criticisms were... less stupid? like a lot of it was talking about reddit fandom hypocrisy where dalinar was held up as righteous and badass and could do no wrong even though he had tons of personal and political faults that other characters (largely people who WERENT extremely powerful nobles) were demonized for. also a lot of stuff like "adolin is kaladins friend now but i dont think just categorizing it as simple enemies to besties is fair because adolin WAS being overtly racist to kaladin at the beginning there". a lot of discussion about how the Kholins treat darkeyes and characters of lower dahns where the bigotry there was being downplayed by fans in favor of the characters being painted both by fandom and in the universe of the books as Always Right All The Time. stuff like that.

that's not to say the whole kholin crit tag was all, like, stuff that isnt bullshit. people have been dunking on elhokar for being a whiny failking since the beginning of time. but the vibes were a lot different.

kholin critical kind of fell out of favor as a hashtag because most of us realized hey on a doylist level either the things we're criticizing the kholins for are purposeful character flaws that make for richer, more realistic, more engaging characters; or they're oversights from the moderate liberal Sanderson, in which case, why are we complaining about Dalinar doing this, when we should be complaining about Sanderson doing this. so this whole thing is stupid. and also by then the atmosphere on tumblr was way different, this was by and large the Moash Website and while people were haters about characters they did not put the hate in character tags so people largely avoided each others haterism. and there was peace for like a year and a half, i guess.

things are way different now. for context. i track the #dalinar kholin tag. so whenever my dash is dead im checking my tracked tags, and thus i see every original post about dalinar that someone decided to tag #dalinar kholin. and boy howdy, things have devolved. this used to be a chill experience for me, i'd see first time readers go OH MY GOD HE DID WHAT?????? during oathbringer and "[some philosophical shit dalinar said]" -brandon sanderson. follow for more inspiring book quotes" about three times a day, fanart once every couple weeks or so, stuff like that. but now a solid 75% of the posts in dalinars tag are like. hate. not literary criticism, but hate. sometimes about justified things, sometimes about unjustified things, but still, extremely negative.

in a bubble, that's fine. god knows ive been a hater on my blog before and ill be a hater on my blog again. and its not even like im opposed to reading well thought out criticism of my faves on any level because, like, dalinar is kind of a rat bastard! but like. listen. you don't put character hate in that character's tag. you don't do that. the people who are checking a character's tag are fans of that character and fandom is for fun. being a hater directly reaching out to the lovers for comment is rude as hell.

also a lot of the things people dislike about dalinar tie back to his neglectful fatherhood and his alcoholism which is, like, a thing i understand people would have strong negative feelings towards him for having because Neglectful Alcoholic Dad is like one of the top 10 kinds of abusive dads out there so lots of people have very visceral very personal experiences related to that. but when posting about this in any form whatsoever it feels like im having to go back to Treating Addicts Like Human Beings 101. like i feel like ive made a billion posts to the tune of "okay kids, you can do bad things while drunk and you are still responsible and you can also get drunk at inopportune times and you are still responsible, but the act of being addicted to alcohol does not make a character ontologically evil". and like thats. um. a personal thing but also oh my goodness.

i dont really have a conclusion to this. im just thinking goddamn its bleak out here right now.

[rearranging-deck-chairs]

Hi hello I watched all of carmilla in a weekend when I was 17 because a student teacher who in retrospect I had a bit of a crush on mentioned that she knew one of the actresses. also I am pretty invested in all your recent vampire stuff because I watched iwtv in 2 days last week because your edit intrigued me

oh hiiii 🫶 thank you for indulging me. thats so cool that you watched iwtv! did it live up to the expectation?

i also watched carmilla at 17! or like, 17-19. i found it when s2 had just started and followed it to the end. did something permanent to my brain but i think it was a good thing. on rewatch now im like, i was right to like this. like it's a solid show, it's good. it has its flaws obviously but it's well written, the emotional moments still get me, i can see why i liked it and i still like it now even when it's not anymore, you know, meeting every need that baby gay me didnt even know they had

what it doesnt reaallyy do though - i dont remember if i posted abt this or if i left it in my drafts but - is explore vampirism as a concept. their subject matter is more lesbianism than vampirism. which is great! thats what they wanted to do and they did it and it's very good. but reading interview with the vampire the book rn im realising how much potential vampires have to be metaphors for like so many things and i started wondering like 'wait, did carmilla just not really engage with it or did it all go over my head'. but it just didnt really engage with it all that much. which again is fine bc that wasnt what they were doing. im glad they were more about the lesbianism than the vampirism

but there's this interesting difference in framing, because in iwtv they keep calling armand 'ancient' right? and emphasising how old he is. and he's like 500? and i was like 'wait isnt carmilla like 400?'. she isnt, shes 340, but still, thats getting there, you know? and we know quite a lot about her history, but kind of just the Big Events. when she was turned, the events of the novella, coffin of blood, silas. thats sort of what we know. but none of the long lonely slog of history day to day you know? with armand i feel like we can really feel how much time everything takes. how every one of those years is made up of single days. with carmilla i dont feel that as much. i keep kind of thinking about daniel, when louis calls him a boy in the first episode, saying "im an old man, with all the triggers that come with it"

because carmilla might look 18 (or mid twenties at this point) but she has lived all that time. shes also seen her native land be claimed by like a succession of ruling powers, right? like armand. shes been buried alive, like louis. when lestat is born, shes already 80 years old, shes lived a whole human lifetime, and the entire adult part of it shes been a vampire. shes lived through 1680-1870 being a lure. i compared her to abigail hobbs in some tags on a post, i dont know if youre familiar with hannibal the tv show, but i do also kinda keep thinking about that comparison

if youre not familiar, in the first episode of hannibal the murderer of the week is this guy garrett jacob hobbs who kills and cannibalises girls who resemble his daughter. and later on it turns out she was made to be his lure. like they'd go places and he'd sent her to the victims to make friends and maybe get them back to their home or smth. not sure if they specified all the details. but that's what carmilla did for mother. and in s2 we hear from mattie that while every couple of decades carmilla had to lure victims for the fish god, she also seemed to just enjoy humans between those times, right? like the doctor, gets lonely, gets a new companion. but we've only sort of got mattie's mocking word for it ("dont eat him, hes a poet! or her, shes got such a wonderful voice. or that one, shes just too pretty to ruin"), we don't know exactly from carmilla's point of view what she was doing or why. if mattie's talking about stuff that happened after the blood coffin, 1950-now, then i think it's a fair assumption based on what carmilla says in the s1 sock puppet show that after she'd figured out what the real situation was and what her role in it was, when she'd started trying to save girls from being sacrificed, that she mightve been doing the same trying to save people from becoming mattie's victims. it's probably more likely that she was just trying to find excuses to stop mattie from sucking someone dry rather than actually having like an aesthetic based morality. but it might be a bit of both. im still trying to figure out what her philosophy actually is, like i dont know what existentialism actually means ghkfjghkj but i will

i also found it pretty striking in the movie when shes turning back into a vampire she says like "this was supposed to be done, you know? the blood lust, the self-loathing, the sleeping tied to a chair in my own bedroom". thats what defines her vampirism, wanting blood and hating yourself for it (the third part is a joke/reference to s1 but also i think meaningful for how she sees her relationship with laura when she IS a vampire. little bit of that 'she will reject me for my monstrousness' shining through). and thats what defines vampirism for lots of vampires across the genre obviously, but i dont know, it struck me. we dont get a lot from carmilla's pov, we know a fair amount about her, but the story is always told through laura. we get laura's diaries, but just snippets here and there from carmilla, what shes thinking, how shes feeling

and i love that shes a philosopher. i love that thats how she seems to try and find something to hold onto, in a world that kind of moves around her, having been murdered, kidnapped, turned and groomed to be a lure on the cusp of adulthood, never having been properly loved (the relationship with her father wasnt good she says in s3, and her mortal mother i dont think has ever been mentioned (like laura's)). the only good relationship she seems to have had for the better part of 3 centuries seems to have been mattie, and mattie seems to love being a vampire. i can imagine carmilla just sort of going along with anything mattie wants to do just because shes so desperate for that friendship. not like, against her will necessarily really. but more like, she hasnt even had the space to develop her own will, you know? and philosophy lets you do that. philosophy gives you frameworks to understand the world and to develop your own opinions on it. and by the 21st century she seems to have developed those opinions, she has a sense of her own values, but shes also still stuck in that same situation. shes jaded and cynical in the face of laura's optimism and strong moral code a lot of the time in s1 because she feels probably pretty powerless. like she does what she can to save some girls but at the end of the day shes scared of her mother and she has nowhere else to go really, right?

i like how she grapples with that over the course of the series, in tandem with laura grappling with her black and white morality. she sort of jumps ship from her mother to laura bc theyve fallen in love, but then laura still stuck in her hero thinking refuses to see her monstrous side. not literally bc i think the biological vampirism never seemed to be a problem for laura, but morally. the having murdered. carmilla needs laura to see that and love her while seeing it bc the last girl she loved rejected her for being a vampire.

but you see her kind of swing back and forth in s2. she softens first with laura but then they break up and she leans back hard into the sarcastic cynic defense mechanisms, leans hard into "im a monster, dont expect heroism from me". but thats like, it's sort of learned helplessness i think. it's powerlessness, resignation. bc morally shes not a monster. maybe she doesnt have as strong a drive to help other people as laura does and is a little more selfishly hedonistic in that she just wants to enjoy her/their life, but she doesnt hurt people for fun, she never has. she just sort of didnt have another option for a Really long time. so she pretends she doesnt care. "im a vampire, this is what i do, this is who i am". but clearly from the way she talks about it when she turns back into one, she doesnt enjoy it

and i like how she goes even further in s3, where she starts swinging even more to the heroic side, bc she sees hope. shes like "wow if we kill my mother, i'd be free". theres hope and she becomes like a lot more active. and shes like that at the start of the movie too, a lot happier, a lot more relaxed, and then vampirism is back and bam depression gfhgkjh like shes immediately more gloomy, ashamed of her past and her self, retreats into herself

sorry i just took this as an opportunity to dump all the carmilla thoughts floating in my head on you. you didnt ask fhkghgjh consider this an open invitation to you or anyone else to come talk to me about carmilla

[sinistergooseberries]

SALAAR (SPOILER ALERT)

continuing my tags from a previous post (sorry 😭 @deadloverscity) : like i said, i do think salaar is a good story so far. I like the world-building, I like the tribe coalition system that becomes a background for our story, and i like the fact that varadha and deva are in a toxic yaoi relationship.

im not gonna lie tho, i just haaaate the cinematography and lighting in prashant neel's movies. it's always a bad time there. It's like slapping a vignette over every frame of the movie, and it takes away any colour whatsoever. I understand that he wants to go for a dark vibe, but trust me, dark vibes can be achieved even without making the entire movie dark and invisible. I literally cannot see the actors doing any action! It's bad! It's not enjoyable. As a typical Telugu moviegoer (and assuming the movie was made for a predominantly telugu audience), I enjoy a somewhat vibrant colour scheme. So far, in all of our movies and even the mega movies (if you have watched RRR and Baahubali) there is a lot colour and imagery going on in the movies. I think in Prashant neel's cinemas, all of this is taken away. He has a set of colours that appear in his films consistently - which are black, grey and red. This colour scheme i feel, if repeatedly used, can be a bit boring and may take away the vibrance of the story. the stark contrasts (imo) do not emphasise the story, they overshadow it. still, take this w a grain of salt.

However, considering the fact that this is just his fourth film, ill cut him some slack. But man, if he is going to make movies for a telugu audience, i hope he lets go of the vignette filter.

next, the worldbuilding. i like it - here is a country that is completely separated from india, yet dictates certain aspects of it. i like that they chose an isolated place that evolves in parallel with the mainland, but retains the values of the tribes, making this place mythical and real at the same time. i was really intrigued by the tribe lore - about how the mannars ousted the shouryangas, and how rajamannar basically went against his own father's rule-book and is now facing dire consequences from bharava, whose tribe has the right to the throne right now. i also love love love loveeeeeee the fact that deva is the rightful heir to the throne - and also also the fact that whether he knows about this or not is left ambiguous. i love how this adds another layer to amma's hatred of khansaar and OH. MY. GOD. chef's kiss i love it.

as a personal taste, i don't like violence and epic fights tm overshadowing the narrative, which i feel the movie does. however, kannada film-making might be different. idk, i havent seen many kannada films other than kantara and kgf. the former is good i absolutely love it - the story is fantastic, the fight scenes are chumma, ufff i can praise it for days. the latter is pretty meh for me.

another thing i love about the movie is.. well, varadha and deva. dude, what is up with telugu guys unintentionally making queer movies these days? what is up with that yallll??? ohmygod. when i tell you that i smelled the romance im not lying. dude. dudeee. the whole friends to enemies to (maybe) friends/lovers arc theyve got going on? oooh baby i can feel the fanfics writing themselves. the whole soaked in blood-fighting-together scene? it was a miracle i wasnt jumping up and down on my seat. the dialogue in that scene 'i have friends more handsome than you' and then varadha getting kinda jealous and shit. lovely. the whole don't touch him thing that deva has got going on - baby boy just kiss him. and man. it's beautiful tragic and im writing a fanfic.

soo yeah this is my rant about salaar. im expecting something from it lol.

[callie-shifts-apparently]

WAIT I GET A TAG I LOVE THIS !!!! u must tell me all about ur fantasy dr now omg

RAAAAH OKAY. Im working on a Notion thingy that I'll link when its "done", and i loath everyday that i havent figured out the magic system yet, but heres the super basic outline:

- Its a european medieval fantasy setting, magic and mythical creatures and such (the only humanoids are like. Elves and Humans though, so not quite high-fantasy)

- I live with my adopted dad + mentor, Cassius, on this collection of floating islands called the Peregrine Islands

- Dragons are a fairly big part of the world but are severely under researched, so we work in a government funded program to study dragons. but this usually means just dicking around with them lol

- Gods are real (though not all powerful). the two primary Gods are Celia of the Moon and her sister Seraphis. Seraphis is commonly known as the sun goddess but shes technically a god of twilight and dawn. Celia's followers are all very different with different styles of worship but generally Celia sends signs through dreams, where as Seraphis dormant because every few hundred years she makes these big "miracles" and exhausts all her power

- The 9 levels of hell are real and each level has a legendary weapon associated with it. In order to keep the 9 Hells closed, the weapons are sealed away in each of the 9 capitals of the world. Eventually one of them (I dont remember which weapon it was my b <\3) gets stolen by this shapeshifter mf and pawned off to pirates but idk where that plotline is going juuust yet 👀

- im Super Cool and also Arospec in this reality so in my dr i naturally have a love triangle goin on 🤘 plan is polyamory but we'll see how it goes lol. One is a boy-next-door type from an old-western-style town me + Cassius visit sometimes, other is from an arctic tribe with these cool seaglass beaches i found on pinterest and immediately adopted into the universe jdbsksbsj

- yeah generally Stuff Is Going On LMAO but 99% of my time in my DR is me going on research trips, special requests from the princess, and housekeeping for dragons lol. eventually im gonna have to write a wholeass BOOK on them and even defining what a dragon IS is going to be such a task oml. but i <3 my work

- other animals like jackalopes and unicorns and phoenixes and merfolk will exist for sure for sure for sure, but ive always been autistic about dragons and that WILL NOT change there

- My riding dragon is a pretty common one but hes my bestest friend ever ever everrrr. Hes an orange + white feathered wyvern called Solstice and I'd die for him a thousand times over. His species typically keep to family groups in these like, year-round autumn forests near the peregrine islands? but during certain times of year theres like. 30-50 of them hanging out in fields to even out the food sources yk. without the camouflage of the forests they just rely on strength in numbers :] i have to go every year but honestly its a vibe. theyre a very docile dragon lol

- Cassius' riding dragon is a very serious girlie called Juno !!! Cassius worships Celia of the Moon very dutifully so even his dragon is moon themed lol. Juno is like a SUPER DUPER rare kind of dragon where they have a really long life span because their eggs almost never hatch. they only hatch on eclipses, and theyre super fun too because if they hatch during a Lunar Eclipse you get the horned variant (Juno), and if they hatch during a Solar Eclipse you get the frilled variant :D!!!! I gotta sit down and properly design them one day but AAAA

- OH Familiars also exist here!! they basically work as like a reservoir of magic if that makes sense? The spell it takes to get one is super tedious and draining but Cassius helped me with like, support spells so i managed. Familiars basically either can double the strength of one spell, or allow you to cast an additional one. They can take on basically any shape so long as its mobile because magic isnt stationary. Mine is a blue tiger cub named Tybalt/Tibby (Hes based on my favourite stuffed animal lol). most familiars are semi-tangible and pretty small - Tibbys about the size of a small rabbit. Familiars natively make like. Wind chime/glass clinking noises :3

[cowboybrunch]

writerblr interview tag!

thank you for the tags @tragedycoded (here) @sableglass (here) and @saturnine-saturneight (here) <3 ive been meaning to get to this one for a minute sooo let's get into it

Short stories, novels, or poems?

i started with poetry, so it has a special place in my heart. all of my short stories turn into beasts. is it a cop out answer to say all of the above?

What genre do you prefer reading?

it'd be easier to list what genres i don't like. when i say ill read anything, i mean ill read anything. lately i've been on a sci fi kick (thanks Pierce Brown) but i love a good modern trashy romance as much as the next guy (i read the booktok sludge so you dont have to!) im not really a nonfiction guy but hey, if anyone has some recs, ill give em a shot

Are you a planner or a write as I go kind of person?

def NOT a planner. usually when i start writing i have a vague idea of where we start and where we need to end up, but what happens along the way is a surprise for everyone involved

What music do you listen to while writing?

SILENCE. sometimes white noise. i cant focus with music, brain gets jumbled

Favorite books/movies?

of all time? oh god for books, probably This Is How You Lose the Time War or The Song of Achilles but The Locked Tomb series is def up there. not a novel but i've read Bluets by Maggie Nelson so many times i probably have it memorized by now favorite movie is Zoolander, easy answer. that movie owns. i can watch it on repeat and ill never get sick of it

Any current WIPs?

Dust to Dust is still alive but im taking a bit of a hiatus before hopping into the final bit (tag is here if you wanna see me ramble about it) Felix Wonder is the fun time brain break WIP of choice currently and im working on draft 3 of Burden of the Reluctant Death (we will get to the ending this time. we will)

Create a character description of yourself: 

Elusive, or pretends to be. Too much energy in too small a body. Refuses to sit properly in a chair. Prone to fits of melancholy remedied by sunlight. Easily excitable, but fussy. Same outfit every day: big sweater, little pants, fuzzy socks. Nails bitten bloody but at least her hair is clean (if a bit too long for summer)

Do you like incorporating actual people you know into your writing?

i could say no but that would make me a liar

Are you kill happy with your characters?

i was gonna make a joke but it would be spoilers soo. i write about grief. no way everyone makes it out alive

Coffee or Tea while writing?

coffee. i dont like tea (sorry sorry!)

Slow or fast writer?

im very much a burst writer so. flood or drought, no in between. lately i'd say SLOW but im just waiting for that spark u get me?

If you were in a fantasy world, what would you be?

this really isnt fantasy but i feel like i was destined to be the kind, slightly off-putting maintenance man in a haunted apartment building that says cryptic things like "don't take the east elevator on a full moon" and "the air conditioning has made that noise since the fire in 12B"

Most fav book cliche:

yea there's only one bed and ill eat it up every single time!!! also: "i didnt know where else to go" or basically any overdone romance trope you can think of. im here for it

Least favorite cliche:

if there's a cliche that i dont like, i havent found it yet

Favorite scene to write?

confession scenes of any kind! scenes where the big tough character breaks down. any kind of emotional revelation, positive or negative

Reason for writing?

words in head, need words out of head ok ok fine, serious answer. i feel like writing is both asking and answering the question, "have you felt like this before? has anyone ever felt like this before? am i alone?" and it's proof that you're not the first and only person to ever experience the things you're experiencing. even this made up guy in this pretend world understands rage and despair and joy and grief and love. the source is different but the result is the same. human connection, man. love it and! it's fun. im having fun

tag!!

@knightinbatteredarmor @friendlesscat @tildeathiwillwrite @glassonthewall @illarian-rambling

@mysticstarlightduck @dyrewrites @sarandipitywrites @oliolioxenfreewrites @xenascribbles

[monstersinthecosmos]

HI <3 Sheith VC anon here back with a very humble request. So I've read TVL and am currently reading QoTD, just finished the Devil's Minion chapter (oH mY gOD my HEART). I'm going through the books a bit slowly bc life stuff, but I have sooooo many thoughts and feelings and feel like I need to read lots of fic to work through it LOL. I would love it if you could rec me some (or tons of!) fics that wouldn't give me (m)any spoilers re: stuff that happens after this point in the series. I realize this might be a kind of hard/maybe impossible request because a lot of those spoilers would be referring to things that chronologically would have taken place prior to DM for instance, but I'm so starved I thought I might ask just in case! I'm not suuuper partial to any specific ships (Lestat/Louis is a bit boring IMO 😭 but I love them so I'll take it) and I don't have any NOTPs, so I'm down to read pretty much anything (esp if it's spicy and/or hurts my heart and/or features Armand lmao). Totally fine if this is too much trouble or if it turns out to be an impossible ask indeed; thank you in advance anyway! AND THANK YOU AGAIN for introducing me to these brain-rotting books lol I spend like half my waking hours thinking about Armand now.

SHGKJALDS I SPEND HALF MY WAKING HOURS THINKING ABOUT ARMAND TOO SINCE LIKE THE YEAR 2000 LMFAO im so glad you see!!!!!!!!!!!! YOU GET IT MAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! So babe tbh the reason I started writing Armand/Daniel fic at all is because there really ... isn't that much? And I was like GUESS I GOTTA FUCKIN COOK FOR MYSELF. So tbh I haven't actually read a ton of VC fic at all. The otp:true filter for them on AO3 (excluding TVverse fics) only has 237 fics hdkjgalds but you can start here LOL. I think for the most part you'll be able to tell in the tags if it's post-QOTD because people usually will tag like "post canon" or "Prince Lestat Era"; for QOTD fics check for a Devil's Minion/Devil's Minion Era tag. I don't always remember to tag my own fics but my only post-canon D/A fic is called "In the Trials of the Heart" and all my others are Devil's Minion era and shouldn't spoil anything ! Be aware that the TV fandom and book fandom sometimes overlap so there might be stray TV fics in the book tag; it won't spoil anything bc the TV canon is a completely different story, but it might not make sense if you jump in to read it. So without actual fic recs I'll share some authors that I really trust!! Have a look through their VC fics!!!!!!!

apoptoses (pervert extraordinaire 10/10, all the D/A fics are Devil's Minion era except for Blood Sanation so go nuts!) covenofthearticulate (this is Ash, she actually writes Loustat & Louis/Armand mostly but she's so smart and I trust her so much!!!!) Diabolus_Invictus HekateInHell (writes a lot of Lestat/Armand and also has a human AU called Our House that I'm obsessed with!) ImhereImQuire Nothing_But_Paisley rainandcoffee (if you're sick of all of our doom&gloom you can find fluff and lightness here!) whisperbird (just one VC fic but I think about it every day of my life I love it)

Whenever I remember I try to post VC fics that I do read, kinda like how Sheith fandom does Wednesday Fics, I try to tag #VCFicFriday so try there too!

Anyway if anyone wants to add to this post and share recs PLEASE DO I actually am not a great fic reader bc my attention span sucks and I'm picky about canon compliant porn LOL! But help our new friend out if you want to share any!!!!!!!!!!!!

[volivolition]

dude the TOP song you posted (truce) fucking kills me and the way you described the animatic is??? so good???? I'd bawl actually /pos

I need to know if there's any other TOP songs you relate to the furies/any DE character really, or any slower songs even if they aren't by TOP

OH AGREED ABSOLUTELY!! TRUCE MY BELOVED... and THANK YOU!! we are imagining animatics and crying together! /pos :'] <3

ooh!! well, i havent listened to a lot of TOP in a while, so i don't have many recommendations there unfortunately :'] but for other slow, soft songs, let's see... i'll put them under a cut with all my explanations, but ☀️ "See The Day" by The Altogether (Volition song!), 🍃 "Rounds" by The Oh Hellos (Shivers song!), 🦋 "Would You Be So Kind" by dodie (general skills song, Suggestion primarily!) are the best contenders!

Pretty sure you've seen it already, but from a different ask, i recommend "Almost (Sweet Music)" by Hozier! (and "Like Real People Do" if you want to cry and yearn with me, though my DE ideas for it are very loose hkjhg) these are slow ones i like hkjhg <3

"Goodbye" by The Altogether is a Harry and Dora song :0

"Soldier, Poet, King" by The Oh Hellos is one i specifically relate to Volition (my beloved protector/motivator/crownhead blorbo! [picks him up and wiggles him!!!]), but i would make one of those animation memes for it with every skill slotted into a "soldier" "poet" or "king" position.

☀️ "See the Day" is both another The Altogether song and another Volition song! a real "the worst is over. we made it through. we're going to survive this. it might not get easier yet, but we'll come out the other side and we'll be alive" song. it makes me cry hkjgh

🍃 "Rounds" by The Oh Hellos is a soft Shivers song, though the lyrics don't start until halfway in. ough my god listening to it makes my heart ache (/pos) <3 La Revacholiere singing to Harry in the wind. "Will you start when I end? Yeah, I'm long in the wind..."

"Northern Star" by Dom Fera, a song Harry would sing for karaoke and dedicate to Kim, and then they'd waltz a little clumsily on the dim, starlit sidewalk on their way home for the evening... <3

🦋 "Would You Be So Kind?" by dodie BUT SPECIFICALLY THIS VERSION, because i love everyone's crowded but earnest vibes. this one is led by Suggestion ("oooh you wanna fall in love with us so bad right? right???") and makes me grin, you GOTTA imagine all of the skills squished together in the front of Harry's brain all trying different tactics to get Kim to fall in love with them, (rhetoric: "I HAVE A QUESTION..." ency: "let's write a story! be in my book!") at 2:35, after all the skills singing together loudly, it's just Harry himself singing to Kim, with all the skills slowly backing him up. the ending is all of them fucking ECSTATIC celebrating when harry finally kisses kim hkjhg jesus this'd be so cute hold on i have to go plan this out i have so many thoughts hkjdh

"Seven" by Sleeping at Last would be a sweet Reaction Speed song (ironic that im adding react speed to a list of soft, slow songs though hkjgh) "I'm ready for whatever comes next!" <3 Reaction Speed is a fast, restless little fella who can't sit still for long, always loves moving, acting, doing. he's like the personification of a verb hkjhg <3 i would also accept an interpretation for echem <3

"Cosmos" by Jawbreaker Reunion is a song that The Furies recently suggested to me as a jean song and it's so right for that, very soft and i like it very much :'] (you should also ask The Furies if you want to, it's much more musically inclined than me, i feel hkjhg <3)

awuahg thank you for asking and for reading!! i appreciate it!! <33

oh and here's links to all of the songs in the tags: Come Together Now, Two, Four, Five, Six, Eight, Nine, RPG Animation Meme (<- homestuck lmao)

[dootznbootz]

saw this post while browing the odypen tag and someone in the comments said something along the lines of "penelope WOULD have to be abducted and not going alone of her own free will like helen" and im gonna lose it

https://www.tumblr.com/usuallyobsessedtmblr/744370775987994624/the-urge-to-write-a-fic-where-penelope-gets?source=share

A N G R Y

The post itself is perfectly fine. I have my own ideas on "What if Penelope gets kidnapped instead?" (Hector's pov most of the time, Odysseus basically does a stealth mission, Andromache's life is in danger for a bit, Everybody gets whiplash from the man who was so fucking terrifying and under a different name is now kissing and crying with your guest,etc. IDK gimme an ask if you want a snippet)

But the fucking rest?!?!?

I get excited often, thinking "HEY!!! We're getting better with Nuance!!!" and then get slapped by THIS.

Sure, technically it's kind of unknown if she for sure went of her own choice. From what I remember, there's basically a bit of play on words with how "Oh Aphrodite caused this." which either means "Oh I've been struck by LOVE!" or "She literally grabbed me and plopped me on Paris' boat and/or love spell"

Either way, does it matter that much?

Like personally, I believe in the "plopped on Paris' boat" version. As that makes the most sense. AND because to me, her and Odysseus' stories are "mirrors" in many ways as they have a lot of the same stuff kind of happen to them. I made a post about it a while back.

But by the Iliad??? She clearly doesn't want to fucking be there!!!

I get so fucking upset when it literally states in the text that "Hey, they're not having a good time. They're very scared and they're victims." and then people act like "well they didn't try hard enough"

ESPECIALLY SINCE THERE ARE GODS INVOLVED! This isn't PJO where 12 year old Percy beat Ares!!! She cannot just say no as that literally gets her yelled at by Aphrodite!!!

Thus spoke the goddess, and Helen's heart yearned after her former husband, her city, and her parents.

(Book 3, Butler)

[...]you’re in love with some mortal man and Menelaus has just beaten Paris and wants to take me, a despised woman,                                    back home with him? Is that why you’re here, you and that devious trickery of yours? Why don’t you go with Paris by yourself, stop walking around here like a goddess, stop guiding your feet toward Olympus, and lead a miserable life with him, caring for him, until he makes you his wife or slave. I won’t go to him in there— that would be shameful, serving him in bed. Every Trojan woman would revile me afterwards.                            Besides, my heart is hurt enough already.” Divine Aphrodite, angry at Helen, answered her: “Don’t provoke me, you obstinate girl. I might lose my temper, abandon you, and hate you just as much as I have loved you. I could make Trojans and Danaans hate you, too. Then you’d suffer a miserable death.” Aphrodite spoke. Helen, born from Zeus, was too afraid. She covered herself in her soft white linen shawl, went off in silence, unnoticed by all the Trojan women.     

(Book 3, Johnston)

SHE TRIES!!! SHE'S HURTING!!! Technically,there is no real answer if she went willingly or not...that's kind of the point!!! But by the Iliad, she's miserable.

Getting offtrack but this line is doing something to me

Menelaus has just beaten Paris and wants to take me, a despised woman,                                    back home with him?

I mean, holy shit!!! "He just beat Paris, Menelaus still wants to take me, a piece of shit, back home"

This sounds like such a fucking PLEA. She's SO hopeful. This gives an undertone of "Save me, please" and ksldjf HELEN!!!!!!!!!!! 😭 MY DARLING I'M SO FUCKING SRORRY

Look, I hate cheating just as much as anyone. Like, personally as well. But to even think something like "Well they were fine with it at first, therefore this is what they get." like??? Do you hear yourself? You're saying someone deserves to be raped. That's even if you are just going with the "She was clearly fine with it at first." because that's not necessarily supposed to be the "correct" interpretation.

I'm hoping that whoever said it, is just misinformed, because any other thought makes me itchy.

Also side thing, I'm fucking tired of comparing Helen and Penelope and "having them bitter towards each other". Even in the Odyssey, Penelope SAYS Helen wouldn't have left of her own choice and that's why she tested Odysseus because she was scared of the same thing happening to her. Honestly it's funny because the more "pitting against each other" I see the more I'm like "They're even CLOSER now in my fics!!! They are gossiping and having fun because THEY DON'T HATE EACH OTHER!!!"

Remember Helen of Argos, Zeus’s daughter— would she have sported so in a stranger’s bed if she had dreamed that Achaea's sons were doomed to fight and die to bring her home again? Some god spurred her to do her shameless work. Not till then did her mind conceive that madness, blinding madness that caused her anguish, ours as well.

(Book 23, Fagles)

I love both the gals so much, even for their "awfulness". Retellings, you're fucking boring if you make them hate each.

[madebypointlesswords]

just for funsies: books im currently reading

I cannot, for the life of me, read just one book at the time. I've tried multiple times and I just can't. It's most likely my untreated ADHD but oh welllll, have fun with my silly little books and go right ahead and judge my taste in the tags <3

The Iliad, Homer

Honestly such a fun book. I'm reading it very slowly though, because I want to savour each sentence. It's a thrifted version that someone else annotated and I got it for like, 7 euros? The annotations are very cute and fun to read while reading the actual book and it made me consider doing the same (annotating a book and then donating it to thrift so some random stranger can delight in my silly thoughts). Achilles is a bit of a dick but I like him that way. Diomedes is my absolute favourite (together with Patroclus).

This is the edition I have

1984, George Orwell

This book was an impulse buy from my favourite bookstore. I'm enjoying it thorougly, and I mainly bought it because I was going to see a play inspired by it that week and planned to read it first. I got through 50 pages. Orwell's style is a delight though, I have no notes. I'm currently like, one quarter into the book.

My edition (I'm looking for Animal Farm in the same style. I know it exists I just keep finding other ones and it irks me.)

Good Omens, Terry Pratchett & Neil Gaiman

Tumblr (and my best friend @mairrion) convinced me this year to watch Good Omens right when season 2 came out. I curse you all for the brainrot you have given me. Literally why did you have to do this to me. I bought the book very recently (this monday) and I'm 1/5 into the book. The writing is honestly so fun and I've laughed several times out loud on the bus while reading. Definitely recommend this to new (or old) fans of the series.

I got the edition with Crowley on the cover (they didn't have Aziraphales version but I still would have gotten Crowley's anyway). Mine's a tad different: the letters are golden, Terry is mentioned before Neil is, and Crowley's wine isn't red. Oh and there's a sticker advertising the series.

Little Thieves, Margaret Owen

Oh my god this book is fun. Delicious characterisation. Wonderful dialogue. Stunning worldbuilding. Honestly I am so angry at myself for not being able to read this cover to cover. Why am I LIKE this. The cover is also so extremely pretty what the fuck.

Just look at this

Crime and Punishment, Fyodor Dostoevsky

This book is a banger. It annoys me that I can't read it in one sitting. Because I genuinely LOVE it but I just fucking can't. I love it when Dostoevsky takes a break from the plot to remind us as readers that Raskolnikov is, in fact, very much a pretty boy. Peak comedy right there.

I got the Wordsworth classics edition because it was only 4 euros at my favourite bookstore again (i apologise this is the best picture I have)

The Ruthless Lady's Guide to Wizardry, C.M. Waggoner

I got this book today from one of my best friends and I've read only one chapter but holy hell I am hooked. This is amazing. This is fun. This is exactly what I want. Chaotic, sapphic and unhinged slightly evil women are my drug of choice and this is a heroin shot. Live laugh love Dellaria Wells.

also look at the pretty cover mmmm

The Darkening Age (The Christian Destruction of the Classical World), Catherine Nixey

My first non fiction book I think. Nixey's writing is exquisite and I am loving this book with all my heart. It's educative, interesting and just overall, a wonderful experience to read. I do encourage everyone to take it with a grain of salt, but the author has many, many cited works, so I'm not saying that you have to be overly critical of every sentence, just that the author is (just like any other human being) a bit biased.

btw the cover is pretty too :) but I just can't find a picture of it.

[neims-skeleton-obsession]

16, 18 and 31 on Skulduggery for the ask game?

SKUG FUCK YEAH oh god these are gonna make me experience Thoughts And Feelings arent they /pos 16) deepest darkest secret they won’t even admit to themselves: oh this is. this is so evil i love you thank you im probably gonna end up spoiling book 15 be warned the first Plausible thing i thought of was that he did love china, for a little while. i hate the whole grandkids thing it doesnt make sense even chronologically but eh but no i do think he loved china for a bit, and not just because of the w. the whole her being beautiful as fuck- but because he really, truly cared about her. he probably would have felt so guilty about it if hed ever given it any thought- especially after he found out about some of her Worse Shit i think probably after wifey? like a few decades or so after wifey/the war. maybe. hm second thought: he thinks he is entirely unforgiveable. he says that he'll reclaim his family crest some day- but i do think he's lying. mostly to himself, but to val also. but realistically he has no plans to forgive himself, or accept others' forgiveness of him. he would deny that. i think. probably because admitting that to himself would make it that much harder to keep doing things- ie qquote un-quote good things. because if it wouldnt make a difference, it wouldnt change what hed done, what would be the point? 18) what they’d go to see a therapist about: i think he would have to be forced to go at gunpoint but id like to believe hed choose to go ghddgh but i think initially he'd go for. yknow how a fuck ton of characters point out him being an "angry man"??? thaaaaaat but it'd end up including his gEneral self loathing and all that traumatic sh- genuinely take a shot for every time he's been tortured and that doesnt include everything that's happened. ok. there's a lot. i don't know how if he'd actually be helped by going to therapy though. the systems arent that great for one and i think a lot of the gENeRAl sElf HatREd is. quite ingrained at this point rgyfhdgf.

31) jf they had a tumblr what would it look like: mmmm ok two thoughts: classic cars or getting into debates over true crime/crime. based fiction i dont remember what the genre is called i think all he'd figure out how to change is his pfp (probably just. set to a picture of his bentley or something oR. he'd deliberately leave it as default. or val would change it to something ridiculous and he'd give up trying to reset it), and his blog title n such. which i imagine would just be his name or, again, val setting it as something dumb and him not being able/bothered to change it erhgbegd. he'd either post an ungodly amount or very little at all (n just mostly reblogging stuff), probably the first, but he would use entirely correct grammar n punctuation, and probably correct other people on theirs in the tags. dickhead.

thank you for the ask!!! and sorry for the ramble(s)!!!!

[atzrecs]

I tried fitting this all into the tags, but I can't shut up so it didn't work akdkd

IM APOLOGISING IN ADVANCE FOR THESE TAGS BC SODIDK IM SORRY IM DOWN SO BAD IF YOU READ THESE IM SO SORRY

THIS IS MY INNER MONOLOGUE / FEEDBACK IM SORRY IT SEEMS LIKE IM COMMENTING ABOUT EVERY PART IDK WHEN TO SHUT UP

''the one who smells like winter but has the eyes of a smoldering flame spreading to a forest fire'' oh god this is so accurate it hurts just the thought of those eyes 😩

BUT THE WHOLE OPENING PARA ACTUALLY THE MENTION OF HIS HANDS 😩😩😩 AND HIS DRESS SENSE 😩😩😩 lord am I whipped

Anyway

New piercing equating to heartbreak oh dear I hope his ears don't fall off 😭 he so cute please yes he not mysterious he a silly lil boy I love him

I'm so whipped I can tell this fic is going to make me worse djdjd

Oh the description of reader adjdjeje I feel seen

The way he looks at reader🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

and then ''You feel like you're not a person meant to be looked at this way'' 🥺🥺🥺☹️ oh

NOOO NOT A SMILE THAT IS SOFT AND ENTIRELY FOCUSED ON YOUUU IM DEVASTATED

''The one thing in the world you hate, he gives to you and makes you feel as though you don’t hate it nearly as much as you did before meeting him.''

🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺 stop it now

LOL I UNDERSTAND COMPLETELYYYY ABOUT THE CITY HAVING THE MOST WONDERFUL AND SHITTY VIEW

''It’s not my fault that it always feels like a first date with you.'' IT IS YOUR FAULT BITCH STOP DOING THIS TO ME WITH YOUR CUTE ASS 😭😭😭

The not liking his coffee convo is so cute so domestic I can't do this

iF yoU doNT LiKe iT yOuD sToP LetTiNg mE TAkE yOU OuT RiGHt OH SHUT UP YOU COMPLETELY ADORABLE CORRECT SMARTASS

Oh he looking for confirmation 🥺

''tucking himself into the smallest version of himself as he huddles into his oversized sweater'' okay this image broke me 🥺

You’ve made it clear that you expect nothing from me.”

''You nod, but tilt your head in question as your own eyes follow his gaze to the moon''

''So, it makes me want to give you everything''

Oh gosh... oh wow oh gosh op why would you make him say that I am FEELING THINGS

Melting is right 🥺🥺🥺

''Kind of want this to be the last first date'' I'm sobbing why is he so fuckin cute this is unfair

LOL WAIT NOT THE MISUNDERSTANDINF AKDJEJEJ omg I understand his dumb shit in important situations 😂

''You let him fuck that up and now you’re smiling at him and he can’t help but let his heart swell three times its original size'' adorable 🥺🥺🥺🥺

''You’re somehow right there with him even if you feel like you’re on two different pages of two different books'' 🥺🥺🥺🥺 why is everything so cute op I'm so 🥺🥺🥺

NOT THE POINT OF GENTLE MOUTH AND JAW KISSES AND OFFICIALNESS DOES READER GET RID OF DOUBTS😩 PERFECTION HIS KISSES MAGIC

''you feel loved for the first time in a long time''🥲🥲🥲🥲 oh hongjoong

''you felt safe and at home when his hands were roaming your body'' oh 🥺 to have the trust that hands that aren't yours will handle you with care IM SO DKDKDK😭😭😭😭🥺🥺🥺🥺😩😩😩😩

NOT THE INTERTWINING FINGERS AS YOU KISS OP WHAT ARE YOU DOINGGGGG TO ME 😩😩😩

''His lips are curled into this permanent little smile that tells you otherwise'' his smile his smile his smileeee

HONGJOONG NOT PUSHING FOR MORE HONGJOONG CONTAINING HIMSELF HONGJOONG GOING AT READERS PACE AND BEING SATISFIED WITH THEIR KISSES HONGJOONG ASSURING READER THEY DONT HAVE TO DO ANYTHING MORE HES SO LOVELY I CANNOTTTT

''glancing down to your lips again as if he already misses them'' oh im getting butterflies pls

Not 😩 the 😩 throaty 😩 groan

NOT THE DENIM AND THE RAWNESS OH NO AKDKDK

Shy joong not wanting you to see him when he takes his sweater off🥺🥺🥺

Oh that whole little part about him being shy and reader showing confidence 🥺 and he saying how can he not be 🥺 that was so 🥺🥺🥺

OKAY OKAY IM SO DIZZY OP

THE INTIMACY YOU HAVE CREATED THE SHEER HOTNESS AND BUILDUP FROM GRINDING AND TOUCHING IS DRIVING ME INSANE

BUT THE MOMENT BFJSJD TOUCHING HIMSELF 😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫 STROKING HIS PRECUM ON HIMSELF AND WATCHING THE DARK SPOT 😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫 LORD

His soft instructions and sweet check ins making sure you're comfortable oh oh oh 🥺🥺🥺

Sensory overload is right 😩😩😫

He’s riding off of the pleasure he’s giving to you - A KING YOU WROTE A K I N G

Forehead kiss while he's deep inside 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

SWATS HANDS TO DO IT HIMSELF AND HOLDING OTHER HAND THE ROMANCE THE INTIMACY H E L P

''Fuck, I can’t get enough of you''

''Let me take care of you''

Me = 🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠

Oh wow. Oh wow I've finished I wished I didn't. I wish I could be in the gentleness you created for longer op

Wish I could relive it like I never knew the words you wrote and how beautiful a world you crafted

I wish I could fall in love with the joong you wrote all over again

That was amazing oh the butterflies and all the feelings you evoked and the cozy atmosphere you created and the humour and realness of it all

How natural and human you made not just hongjoong but reader too

Thank you so much for this 🥺

philoselene (k.h.j)

You weren’t sure what to think of Hongjoong, with his ever-changing hair and ever-growing piercings. He is the complete opposite of you, and you’re unsure of why he keeps gravitating toward you, or why he found an interest in you at all. Through his eyes though, he swears you’d be able to handle the weight of the moon if he were to pull it down for you.

or the one where hongjoong would do just about anything for you, and he can’t help but show it when he’s got you on top of him for the first time.

ao3 | m.list | minors dni! | kindly leave feedback and reblog. 

WORDCOUNT― 6.2k

PAIRING― alt!stoner!hongjoong x afab reader 

CONTENT― some weed smoking and moon gazing happen, a little bit of them struggling to translate their thoughts into words that make sense, very fluffy stuff, he’s a little shy about his body, service top hongjoong, first time together, intensely passionate smut

NOTE― just fyi, i know the description makes it seem like the reader is insecure. I can assure you, she is not. It’s just two people learning that they fit together like a puzzle, and wanting to know each other’s thought processes. anyway, im very in love with hongjoong and that’s why I basically just wrote comfort smut. BYE. not proof read so pls dont point out my typos, ill actually cry. 

smut tags under cut:: 

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