#officers jobs

[spongebobssquarepants]

“Haven’t seen you in awhile, what you been up to?”

me:

[roe-oo]

upper management

[otselotus]

He just want some coffee before his 6am shift :c

[chloesimaginationthings]

The real reason why FNAF movie Vanessa got her job,,

[time-woods]

off in some alternative universe theres a cosmic office comedy with some romantic undertones taking place

[wasabi-gumdrop]

Kabru has a secret admirer in the castle!

[pachimation]

there’s nothing wrong with a bit of workplace gossip, right?

[erodingsinner]

Leverage parodying The Office was 10/10 much better than The Office

[morganbritton132]

Eddie’s trying to film a Tiktok showing off what he thinks is the best Chinese food in Chicago but has to stop because he’s getting the most judgmental look from Steve so… “What? What’s that look?”

Steve: What are you doing? You don’t know anything about good food.

Eddie: Yes, I do. I’m a foodie.

Steve: No, you’re not. Your favorite food is pizza rolls. Cooked in the microwave.

Eddie:

Steve: I watched you eat Ramen out of the trash once.

[skellydun]

Actual Phone Conversation I Had With A Girl Absolutely Going Through It This Morning:

me very quickly: hi this is dylan from x. how are you today? is now a good time to talk?

girl on the phone: what? oh you know! it's just work, work, work.

me: haha yeah! Just another busy Monday :)

girl on the phone i have known for exactly 11 seconds: sometimes i wish it would just stop. it's relentless. and it's every week! how many mondays can someone go through?

me trying to do my job: ha ha i know right? so I'm calling--

girl on the phone i have known for exactly 16 seconds: i'm so tired. i'm soooooo tired. shelby kept me up all night again. she will not get over keegan. they keep calling each other just to yell i swear to god.

me: only 4 days till the weekend and some sleep! :D

girl: yeah. but she's sleeping with me. at my house. didn't he tell you? who is going to get the dog? or the fucking 300 dollar blender I got them?

me: unfortunately no! so i would love to know more but the reason i'm calling is to get you scheduled for x job interview are you still interested?

girl whispering: what?

me awkwardly: it's...i'm dylan. from x. the x job you applied for. we would like to interview you for it.

girl: oh my god. no. oh my - I am so sorry. I thought you were my friend--I cannot believe--I told you work was relentless. I don't really mean that! I talked about blenders!

me: no, no I totally get it. It can be. But that's why you're interviewing for somewhere better! Tell Shelby to apply too! Do you have any availability on Thursday?

[idkaguyorsomething]

five nights at freddy's is a film that creates a tense, suspenseful atmosphere of horror by having its protagonists go up against supernatural threats such as trying to navigate the job market, being forced to deal with shitty cops, and a man who willingly makes himself think of nebraska over and over again every night

[ophanim-vesper]

everyone wants Chihiro and Haku to reunite but WHAT ABOUT THEM

[slfcare]

the most difficult thing about growing as a person socially, as in getting out of your shell and noticing that you are, is that there will still be times when it doesn’t feel like you’ve grown at all! times when you can’t really connect with anyone around you, times when you fail to enter into an existing conversation, times when you say the wrong thing (or nothing at all when in hindsight you probably should’ve). but that’s also kind of the best thing, because that’s the thing that helps you realize that sometimes, it’s not you or your lack of skills or any shortcoming. sometimes certain environments just aren’t for you and certain people aren’t your people, and that’s okay. that’s human. it’s okay to not feel the progress you have made all the time.

[foxsketch6543]

Is it me or is history is repeating itself?