#of why she was suggesting that position for me
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GOOD FOR THE HEART
country! vi x reader fluff, angst, smut (18+), slow(?)burn, wc. 13.6k
synopsis: an intimate bond forms between an ill farmer's daughter, desperate for a taste of the outside world, and the helpful part-timing cowgirl at the farm. OR vi wants you bad, and what better way to get to know you than sneak you around town?
content warnings: illness, NOT read over, foul language, smut so mdni/18+, fingering r!receiving, controlling parent, health worries, fainting, slight insecurity, emotional rollercoaster but a fun one!!
soundtrack: my girl (the temptations) | our love (curtis harding + jazmine sullivan) | | we’ll never have sex (leith ross) | pillow (malcolm todd) | close to you (carpenters) | not a lot, just forever (adrianne lenker) | cool about it (boygenius) | pancakes for dinner (lizzy mcalpine)(this sounds sm like vi to me) | kiss me (sixpence none the richer) | i bet on losing dogs (mitski) aftercare (listen post-fic): sienna (the marias)
Vi could strip naked right here, right now.
And with her well known spontaneous personality, she would. Especially under the hundred degree heat that preys upon her and forces the girl’s freckled skin to glisten. But a: she’s with her siblings (enough said), and b: she’s working outdoors at the Laurier’s farm. Meaning only a handful of yards away, tucked in that blue, yellow, and white idyllic house covered with blooming botanical life, stands Mr. Laurier’s orphic daughter.
That’s all Violet’s ever heard about you, from children playing on the street to adults roaming the town shops. Ever since her adoptive father suggested she take this summer job before she goes back to focusing on her college work. Ever since her siblings and family friend jumped to tag along after Mr. Laurier decided ‘the more the merrier’.
All that’s been filling Violet Lane's ears is information about you, or, the lack thereof. How you’re always locked up in that big residence. How you used to roam the town just like any other little rascal until five years ago, at the age of thirteen, when something out of her knowledge occurred. How stunning you look in a sundress. She tried to block that one out.
“Why is it that Mylo’s drivin’ the tractor and not me?” Powder complains, pulling her clenched hand from the bag of chicken feed and tossing it on the ground for the horde to gobble.
“Last time you tried to drive something I started praying.” Ekko throws out. His bun shaped hair bobbles as he finally pulls that one stubborn carrot from the ground and places it in the basket.
“Besides Pow,” Violet starts, lifting a heavy brown box onto her shoulder and cradling it with just one arm. “You’re doin’ fine taking care of the animals. Mylo would be scaring them to death.” The pink haired girl sighed out, looking around.
Her gaze landed on the decorated porch, and she pursued. Vi set the last of the boxes down with a soft grunt before straightening her back and lifting her arms, clasped at the fingers, over her head to get a well-deserved stretch.
The worker’s completely regretting her chosen position as the door swings open, and she looks heaven right in the eyes.
You stand there in a white lace sundress covered in a juicy red pattern of cherries, a smile sweet enough to give a sugar high plastered on your stunning face. Vi’s gaze flickers down to your feet covered by red country boots. Above those are your soft looking hands holding a gift basket. When she’s done examining you, her blue-gray eyes trail their way back to yours– and it’s like whiplash. Once again, she’s blinded by those pearly whites and the tasty perfume radiating off of you. God help me, is the only phrase filling her mind because damn you’re ethereal.
“Hi there, cowgirl.” You’re going to send Vi into cardiac arrest with just your voice. Thankfully, she realizes she needs to respond, and quickly wipes the dopey grin (that she wasn’t aware she had) off of her face.
It’s not like everything is peaches and cream on your end. The girl’s tight white t-shirt is grasping onto her glistening biceps, her pretty bright eyes and the freckles that decorate her nose make her look blessed by the sun, and seeing such a beautiful yet handsome woman in a cowboy hat is doing foreign things to your stomach. ‘Wow’, is all your wandering mind formulates.
“Hi there, miss Laurier,” she copies you in her lower voice, and you notice the slit on her lip as it curls up into a soft smirk. You shake your head at her words with a polite smile, insisting she call you by your name, which you offer up. She repeats it once perfectly, claiming it ‘rolls right off the tongue’, and you crack a smile.
“My father informed me that you’re the new help around here for the summer, so I decided to bake somethin’ for the five of you.” You’re sticking out the basket, decorated with a pink bow on top, for Vi to take. She does and quickly takes a peek inside. Five snickerdoodle cookies and one large cherry pie. You do stay on theme, and so, it starts.
“Thank you, cherry.” she cracks a smile that sends a shock down your body, and gently tips her hat.
Fourteen searing days pass on that farm, days filled with laughter, hard work, and the smell of life from the surrounding plants.
But not for you.
For each of those fourteen days, for the past one thousand eight hundred and twenty-five days, you’ve sat sideways in your window with your back against one side and your legs propped up on the wood. You read, journaled, book pressed flowers (that you had to sneak out front to get), took much needed resting breaks, tended to your pet lamb Daisy, and watched Footloose. Your sock-covered feet subtly shuffled side to side as if you were mimicking their dance moves in your head.
Vi watched as you sat there all those days in your open window. Half of your body out in the fresh air and half cooped back up inside like the past five years of your life. It was as if you yearned to experience life completely outside the window, but you couldn’t. And so, you completed your daily activities the furthest away you could get.
Until your eighteenth birthday came along.
“Lord, can you focus instead of stalking your ‘cherry’,” Ekko mimics the pinkett’s voice with the last two words, wiping his forehead with the back of his hand.
“Bet she wants to pop her cherry.” Mylo snickers at his own joke, earning a slap to the nape from Claggor.
“Last warning Mylo. Don’t talk about her like that.” she replies firmly, furrowed brows making a little scowl.
Claggor shakes his head softly, letting the tension between his siblings diffuse before speaking. “You know, you should do something other than just stare at her all day. It’s getting sad.”
“Like?” the cowgirl responds with crossed arms.
“Ask her to hang out, obviously.” Powder pipes up, petting a sheep as she prepares to guide it inside the barn. “She’s always lookin’ so lonely. Swear the only time she smiled this past week was when you complimented her on those blackberry muffins she baked us.”
“You know she’s not supposed to come out, Laurier said so. Pretty sure that’s why she stays upstairs, can’t even come out on the porch when we’re here no more.” Violet huffs.
“You think he thinks we’re a bad influence on her?” Ekko ask in confusion. Because truth be told, no one knew why you stayed locked up in that bright house, like a princess trapped in a tower. People knew better than to ask your father, and of course, they couldn’t get to you. Maybe it was time for someone to be your knight in shining armor.
“Doesn’t matter, he’s not even here right now.” Mylo insists.
So, after a long back and forth conversation of weighing the possibilities, Violet’s shoved over to the shrubs in front of your second story window. You notice her when she’s there (you’ve been sneaking glances at her every so often), shifting your position so that you can look down on her as she calls out your name.
“Afternoon, cowgirl,” you coo, tucking a piece of hair behind your ear.
“Hey there, angel,” she simply replies with that signature smile, and your hands clench the frame you’re leaning on a bit tighter. “We’re done with the chores for today.”
“Oh. Well, get home safely.” you hum, eyes dropping in what Vi hopes is discontent, because her next words will cheer you right up.
“Actually, we’re not headed home just yet. The five of us are headed out into the woods over there for a little.. chat." The glowing sunlight illuminates her face as she nods her head to Mylo, who’s allowing the brown paper bag to peek out of his backpack and into your vision. Alcohol. “Would you wanna come with us? Won’t take up too much of your time, I promise.” she asks with a cool voice but a pounding, fearful heart.
No.
Or at least, that’s what you were supposed to say. It’s what you’d normally say. As much as your ill heart ached to connect with others, as much as you wanted to venture out of your home, as much as this strawberry-haired helper made you want to explore new things you’d only ever seen in movies, your answer always had to be no.
But, unbeknownst to the others, today was your birthday. You had cautiously lived another year, and instead of feeling fulfilled, you only wonder how many you have left.
You wanted to live, not survive.
You stared in contemplation before backing up, shutting the window and rushing out of the girl’s sight.
Vi dropped her head down to the shrubs in front of her. It’s over. She blew it.
“You scared her!” Ekko teased, making the girl whip her head around to show an angry stare. But the displeased expression faded faster than it formed when the creaking of that back door met her ears, and Powder gasped in joy and disbelief.
“Lead the way.”
The walk along the trail of the woods to a more secluded area with cut wood stumps as seats was anything but quiet. Powder was talking your ear off about everything mechanic she worked on, treating you like you were from the middle ages rather than just sheltered. Claggor and Mylo were leading, causing the group numerous wrong turns and unplanned ‘shortcuts’ (they’d gotten lost along the way). Vi walked with Ekko on her left, quietly pumping her up and giving her the confidence she’d need to ‘make her move’.
But despite the various noises, she couldn’t hear anything. Because strolling to her right was you, the girl she’s been infatuated with since first glance. She’s trying to be discreet, examining the way your hair falls, your scent, the way you press your lips together in thought before answering a question. It took the platinum blonde boy next to her elbowing her side before she came back to the real world.
“I call first sip,” Powder squeaks, to which Violet scoffs, making a quip about how she’s only sixteen and scolding anyone who attempts to offer her the bottle. The bluenette brings up the fact that the others aren’t even the legal drinking age either, but it’s shut down because ‘an adult is an adult’.
“We’ll bring a juice box for you next time.” Mylo smirks, taking a long drag from the bag before offering it out to you.
Despite the soft urge, you shake your head, because you know your limits. Your heart’s limits. Despite the fact that you’re ignoring the sweatiness of your palms and feeble limbs.
Mylo hums. “Two juice boxes, then.”
“Mylo–” Vi scolds, finally coming out of her trance.
But her anger is cut short at the sound of a hearty chuckle coming from your mouth. And it’s the first time Vi’s ever heard you laugh. Genuinely laugh. It’s enough to bring stars to her already-bright eyes.
The conversation continues as the sun and clouds pass by. Eventually, the others are in a heated debate about the best character in some film you’ve never heard of, leaving you and Violet to shyly shift your attention towards each other.
“I’m glad you came. I noticed you.. don’t get out much?” Her tone is the gentlest it’s ever been.
“I’m glad you invited me.” You easily avert her indirect question. It eats you alive, the want to tell her everything about you. How you have a “bad heart” as your father gently put it, and now you live your days mundanely so as to not risk triggering anything fatal. But the desire to live just one day in normalcy is stronger, and so you change topics.
“You have very big muscles. I like them. Is that why you do most of the lifting things rather than herding cattle and such, like other cowgirls?”
Vi feels her cheeks get toasty at the compliment and your almost-awkward forwardness. But you can’t help it, you’ve hardly had conversations with anyone but your father the past few years, let alone a handsome girl so close in age. It doesn’t matter much though, because Vi loves it.
“Not a real cowgirl. I’m only good for lifting what others can’t.” She chuckles a bit. “I just happen to own a horse— and I wear the hat of course… maybe the belt’s a little cowgirl-like too, but that’s all.”
You smirk because that makes her a cowgirl in your book, but you politely hum and say nothing.
The girl shifts her position to turn towards you more, and you swear your heart stops when one of her manspread knees leans against your crossed ones and makes no attempt to move. She examines your behavior, and when she sees the ghost of a smile on your lips, she leans on her opened legs slightly to get more comfortable.
“So what do y’ do in that big house all day, angel? Must get lonely.”
These nicknames are doing terribly good things to you.
You hum. She’s completely correct, but the last thing you want is for her to pity you. “Bake a lot, shop in the catalogs, watch movies, write in my books.” You shrug. “Oh, and I take care of my Daisy girl.” A smile graces your perfect lips.
“That your dog? Never seen her around,” she asked with questioning brows.
“No,” you giggle, sending Vi into heaven. So beautiful. “It’s my lamb.”
A beat passes before she responds, a glint in her eye. “So I should be calling you Bo Peep?” she jokes.
You laugh, knocking your knees against hers in playful scolding. Simple words, simple touches, a simple gathering that may be day to day life for anyone else in the town. But for you, this was the best thing to happen in years.
“Daisy’s a sweet name, matches her sweetheart of an owner.” she compliments you, and you graze your hand over your heart because you can’t decipher why it’s speeding up. “We sound real rugged compared to you. Our dog’s name is Rusty. Powder ch–”
“Hey!”
A deep, raspy voice calls out from behind you. A few of you whip your heads around to see the source of the noise, whereas others stand out of shock as the man comes into your sight. “What are y’all doing on my property? Get over here!” He’s moving quickly towards the group, and Ekko’s the first to move his feet.
“Time to go,” Vi says hastily, standing. Without thinking, she takes your hands and pulls you to a stand. “You a good runner?”
No. I don’t know. I haven’t had anywhere to run in years.
That’s what you should’ve said, but as stated earlier, a life of normalcy for today. And so, you lie.
“Sure– yes, yes.”
Vi nods at that, tightening her grasp on one of your hands as she rushes to exit along with the others. Your hands stay intertwined as the pair of you dash through the greenery, avoiding unfriendly hanging branches, jumping over logs, and ducking under leaves.
You’re terrified. The same glistening sweat that forms in your clammy hands makes another appearance on your forehead. A prickle crawls its way up your throat, and suddenly you’re hacking into your elbow as the cowgirl guides you close to her body while you near the edge of the woods. Your little red problem pounds against your chest as if it’s begging you to stop, to give up before it does, but you can’t.
The man moves quickly, but he’s no match for adolescents of the countryside. By the time you reach the fields of your farm, he’s nowhere to be found.
Powder’s hollering and cheers of victory sound broken, doubling and distilled, coupled with a soft ringing sound and pressure around your head that only grows the longer you stand. The only thing you can hear clearly is your quick panting. That deep red blood is draining from your head and blazing heat is left in its place.
A blurry and distant Violet comes into your impaired vision, and you feel the soft sensation of her cupping your face with worried hands. “Cherry?”
Your mind’s swirling with thousands of sensations, and your terrified breaths grow increasingly shallow until you can’t fight to stay awake any longer, falling into the arms of Vi. There’s yelling, someone scooping you up into their protective arms, orders being thrown around as you’re rushed towards the house, then silence. Complete and utter silence.
The female lead is on your screen twirling and rolling her hips with glee for the third time this week, and you wonder if you'll get a chance to dance like that.
It’d been three days since you fainted after running from the farmer down the trail, three days since you’ve seen Violet (or any of the farm helpers), and three days since you’ve felt that inexplicable warmth in the pit of your stomach.
While you rendered unconscious, Vi and the others scrambled to get your limp body inside. They laid you out on your bed, arguing about whether or not to call for help, because they had no clue what was wrong with you.
Of course, you woke up a couple minutes later as you always do. You were confused and terrified, but strictly instructed to rest by the friends who promised they’d stay until your father arrived. Fatigued even more than normal, you complied.
When your father arrived home an hour later, he stumbled upon Powder placing an ice pack on your sleeping head, Claggor and Mylo pacing the room in worry, Ekko attempting to research what exactly would have caused your current state, and Violet looking sick to her stomach as she cradled your soft hands in her rough ones; praying to whoever’s up there that you’d be fine.
Needless to say, once they’d confessed to leaving for the woods and running back (leaving out every bit alcohol related), he’d been beyond furious, placing you on total lockdown for recovery and demanding the helpers avoid the farm for a couple of days. After you’d gotten your medication in you and recovered after a full day of rest, he chewed you out too. ‘You know I’m just trying to keep you safe.’
But you didn’t want safe anymore, you wanted life.
And Violet walked right through your front door. Literally.
The pinkette runs a hand through her fluffy hair before securing the cowboy hat back on her head. Her eyes are searching the house for the kitchen when they land on you, and a wave of relief washes over her.
“Hi, angel.”
Your heart speeds up, and this time, you don’t need to question it.
“Hi Violet,” you coo shyly, standing from your comfy position on the couch and making your way over to her, hands clasped behind your back.
She wastes no time cradling your face in her calloused fingers, the pair of your soft breaths filling the silence as the girl looks over you, finishing her personal assessment before swiping a thumb across your cheek in gentle comfort.
“I was so worried about you,” the whisper fell from her lips without shame.
“I’m fine, really.” you speak in the same tone, leaning into her sweet hand.
“No, you’re not.” That catches you off guard. “When your father saw what happened he panicked, said something about your heart and thought you were…” she let your mind fill the blank with a glint of pain in her blue-gray eyes. “You wanna tell me what’s going on?”
Your eyes drop to the floor, and before you have time to think about it, you speak. “I’m sick. The bad kind of sick that doesn’t just go away after a couple days.” you can’t look her in the eyes as you speak, just placing a finger to your chest. “I have a ‘bad heart’, as my father puts it. Don’t have a lot of energy, can’t do much without getting too overwhelmed, dizzy spells and such..”
You expect to see a crack in Vi’s sweet eyes, a sign of distaste, of regret for caring about a broken girl, but her gaze only softens and a tender hand moves a piece of hair from your face.
“That why you’re cooped up in here?” she asks, even though she knows the answer. You nod.
It’s silent for some time, and the two of you enjoy the other’s presence in such a milestone moment.
“I have somethin’ for the five of you,” you finally speak, pulling from her affectionate grasp. She nods, wiping the worry she feels in the pit of her stomach away so that she can be there for you. You stroll into the kitchen with the cowgirl behind you, opening and rummaging around the fridge as she takes a needed seat at the marble island.
She looks over your attire. A big bright red sweater hangs off your shoulders that covers your shorts, and a white bow in your hair that brings a smile back to her face.
You turn back around, setting down a tiffany blue cupcake platter and perfectly made white-frosted cupcakes with a purple design in the middle. You then pull out some tupperware, transferring cupcakes into it as Vi speaks.
“They’re Violets,” she says in surprise and you giggle, only nodding your head.
Marry me she thinks, before coming up with something more plausible to say. “Is this what you’re studying in college? You're gonna be a chef or somethin’ angel?”
You pause before barely shaking your head. “Not goin’ to college this year.. my father says I need a gap year before ‘making any big decisions’,” you scoff, because the truth is he just can’t let you go. “Worries me though. He won’t go out and buy me any textbooks or anything, I’m gonna go stupid.” you whine.
Vi presses her lips together, clearly sharing your discontent with the situation.
“Well, I know you’ll do great when you go. There’s already a strong brain in that pretty head of yours,” she grins.
A smile forms against your will as you look up at the girl.
“You think I’m pretty, Violet?’
She responds quickly, like the words spilled out of her heart rather than being formulated in her head. “I think you’re gorgeous. Whoever’s up there took their time making you.”
Comfortable silence ensues as the room’s filled with pounding hearts and warm faces of passion. Finally, you finish packing up Vi’s cupcakes and place the box in front of her. She thanks you, looking to the side in thought before an idea flickers across her face.
The girl rises, lifting the hat from her head and leaning over the marble to place it atop your surprised head. She doesn’t wait for your reaction as she picks up the cupcake box and a wooden crate from the ground (what she should’ve been doing in the first place). “Keep that safe for me until tomorrow, cherry.”
“But isn’t tomorrow your day off?” you ask, flicking the front of the hat so it’s above your eyes.
“Yeah. I’m coming to see you tomorrow.”
The sun couldn’t set and rise fast enough.
You waited in so much anticipation that you woke up an hour earlier, practically shoved your father out of the house with his breakfast, and spent any extra time at a mirror fixing an out of place hair or switching your outfit for the fifth time.
You don’t know why you do– why you care so much. But before you can think too hard on it, the sound of someone pulling into your driveway blesses your ears and there’s six soft knocks at the front door.
And so it starts with you and Vi seated on the floor between the couch and the coffee table. Your backs lean against the lower portion of the soft matter, and Vi pulls out a book. Four books, to be exact. One for each core subject.
You furrowed your brows in confusion, looking from the pile of literature to the fluffy haired girl.
“I was thinkin’ I'd bring some textbooks to you since you can’t get ‘em yourself. I’m in my second year now so I won’t be needin’ these ones anymore.” She somehow speaks with both suave confidence and warm-faced fear in unison. “We could make it a thing, y’know. Preparing for classes together.”
“Yes!” You speak with starstruck orbs.
Violet laughed with relief, because if she had to be completely honest, that wasn’t the only reason she was here. She didn’t need this time to prepare, maybe a quick refresh before the year started, but she definitely didn’t need to be studying during summer. But if it gave her a chance to connect with you, she’d study until her brain burst.
The helpers’ off days were Monday, Wednesday, and Friday. So that’s when Violet would pack her books, hop in her truck, and haul ass to your farm. Each session was the same. You’d start out in comfortable silence reading your separate texts and answering questions or jotting notes down, then Violet would make a stupid joke about a picture in the book or get sidetracked by your bookshelf of dvds in front of her, and minutes later the room would be filled with fits of laughter, fuzzy brains, and your books completely discarded.
“‘Dirty dancing’? Damn cherry, your father know you watch this stuff?” Vi grins, sliding the movie case back into its spot along the brown wooden shelf.
“It’s not that kinda movie, Violet. It’s like.. set in the sixties.” you huff, holding back a smile at her playful words. The pinkette takes her seat next to you on the couch, manspread legs and a cunning smirk just inches away from your face.
“And what exactly is ‘one of those movies’, doll?” she teases.
You scoff.
“I’m sheltered, not stupid.” you play, a soft hand coming up to push against the girl’s arm.
Something flickers across the pinkette’s face before suddenly, she’s on top of you.
You’re pushed onto your back against the plush couch as pure muscle weighs above you, powerful hands swirl at your waist before your laughter fills her ears and your hand shoots out to grab at one of her arms. The pair of you struggle for power, pushing back and forth, twisting bodies, and yelling out competitive quips.
Finally, you smush the palm of your hand against Violet’s face, momentarily stunning her before the stronger girl grabs both of your wrists and pins them right above your head.
Soft panting and awestruck eyes decorate the both of you. The air is tighter, every inch of your body is suddenly aware of your positions, and no words are exchanged as you savor the feeling of her touch. God you feel weak, but you don’t know whether to place the reasoning on Violet or your heart.
Violet’s about to lose it, because with the way your sweet eyes are trailing up her body to her face, her heart is clear.
She wants– no, craves you. Bad.
It’s quiet for a moment longer before Vi clears her throat, reluctantly letting go of your wrists while moving back to stand.
“We deserve a study break.” the cowgirl hums, crouching and examining the lower levels of the bookshelf.
“We haven’t even been studying,” you throw back and fix your skirt while sitting up. Vi finds the record she’s been searching for, pulls it from its sleeve, and adjusts the player.
“Okay smart ass, we deserve a break.” she grins and the stylus hits the circular item.
A soft, sensual song makes its way through the air. It’s older, a woman singing softly about her lover’s perfection, and you warm at the thought of a special someone fantasizing about you to the tune.
Vi stands in the middle of the spacious room, and when you don’t move she waves her arm. “C’mere.”
You stand (a little quicker than you should’ve), and make your way over. She wastes no time, gently moving one of your hands to her shoulder and intertwining fingers with your other. As for your free hand, she tenderly places it on your waist, looking for any discomfort in your face. All she’s met with is big eyes of wonder and god, she’s screwed.
“Just follow my lead.” she’s speaking sensually under the music, thumb rubbing at your waist.
“Oh please, I could dance circles around you.” you quip.
“I’m sure you could, doll. But it’s a slow dance, so we work together.” Your bodies move closer as she speaks, making you smile and lose the sassy attitude for a moment. Just a moment.
Angelic vocals encase the two of you. There are only sounds of that and gentle side steps before you speak once more.
“Did you know it was my birthday?” You stare straight into her eyes.
“Wait, what?”
“The day we went to the woods. Is that why you asked me to come? Because it was my birthday?” you tilt your head.
She blinks twice before huffing a laugh. “No, I didn’t know. This mean I made you faint and get in trouble with your pops as a present?”
You smile to yourself at the coincidence, holding her hand a bit tighter.
“Have you danced with someone like this before?” she asks.
You shake your head before pausing. “Well, once with my mother, but I was very little.”
Vi’s eyes soften a bit more. “Is she..?”
You nod. “It happened when I was eleven. She had the same problem as me, that’s why he’s so protective.” Your voice is soft as you refer to your father. “I understand him, I really do, but I’m just so tired of being separate from the world.”
The girl can only nod, the hand around your waist snakes around to your back and pulls closer until your bodies are almost plush against each other.
“Thank you for trusting me with that,” she whispers. And suddenly, there’s soft giggles. You’re laughing because the tough, suave cowgirl you know can be such a sap.
Your laughter dies down and you shake your head before placing it between the crook of Vi’s neck, softening into your sappy cowgirl. “Talk to me about something good,” you hum.
“I’m takin’ you out on a date Friday.”
Your eyes widen and you pull your head back to look her in the eyes.
She stammers and mentally groans because you’re the only one who could ever make Violet Lane stammer. “Well– if you say yes.”
No.
That’s what you’re supposed to say, and what you should say. Not because of your father’s influence, not for your safety, but because you’re afraid. Afraid of the trouble you could get Vi into, of dealing with the unknown, but most importantly you were afraid of hurting her.
While you aren’t bedridden, your life is fragile, and the thought of being a burden to Vi was heavy and present. How long could she stand you until she got tired of your neediness? How long until she’s tired of hearing about all the things you can’t do? She’s spontaneous, reckless, fun, and you thought she deserves to end up with someone just like that. Someone you’re not.
But right now, you want her, and she needs you, so you give her what you can.
“Of course,” you agree with a genuine, toothy smile, and the pinkette sighs of relief.
The song finally comes to a stop.
For the first time, you’re glad your father works all day long, because there’s no way you could sneak someone as loud as Powder around your house.
Her squeals of embarrassment and your laughter echo from the kitchen throughout every room of your home. Your canvases and paints are neglected as you point an accusatory finger at a message on her screen. A message from ‘Ekko <3’.
“I knew it! The way you talk to each other– ‘Oh Ekko! You’re just so smart,’” you mock her, making the girl’s face change colors faster than you’ve ever seen.
“I do not say things like that!” She yells back, making you giggle harder. “And we aren’t dating.”
“Why not?” you whine. You clasp your hands as if a plea is about to fall from your lips when a ding rings throughout the room. You look down and gasp. A message from ‘Lux <3’.
You pause, eyes flickering to the girl. “Do you have everyone saved with a heart?”
She shakes her head.
“Just those two?”
She nods.
“Oh, this is just like the movies!” Your laughter repeats like a loop. The girl groans at you and moves her phone to the other end of the marble countertop. “I’m kidding– awhh, Powder!”
She shakes her head. “This conversation is all the way over.”
It takes a moment for your giggles to die down, and soon you’re nudging the bluenette’s shoulder with yours gently. “You’ll make the right decision, just don’t waste time overthinking it. Follow your heart.”
She raises her eyebrows, picking up her paintbrush. “I could give you the same advice.”
You scoff out a laugh, gaze landing on your taunting medications in the corner of a counter. “My heart is fighting itself. Wants two different things at once. Certainly can’t have both.”
“Then follow your mental heart, not your physical one.”
You pause, brows furrowing as you look at her with suspicious eyes. “Did Violet..”
Powder shakes her head before you can finish. “No. She can keep a secret, especially for you. I connected the dots on my own,” she shrugs, swiping an electric blue line across the clean canvas. “Y’know, the meds, how protective your father is. Once, on one of your bad days, I looked through a window and saw you sitting down a third of the way up the stairs looking all dizzy and breathless. You fainting just tied it all together,” she hums.
You burn holes into the ground with your utterly ashamed gaze.
“I don’t want anything bad to happen to you, but you should live the life you want rather than being trapped in one you yearn to escape. And you can count on that big baby to protect you.” You let out a little laugh, nodding at the younger girl’s sweet words.
“Oh yeah, she wanted me to give you this. Dummy forgot it yesterday.”
Powder sets the brush down and rummages around her tote bag that lays on the counter, pulling out a tiny black velvet box and handing it to you before turning back to her self-proclaimed masterpiece.
Your heart swells in the best way possible, and you flick open the little clasp to reveal a thick golden ring with two red dots and a green leaf in the middle. It’s accompanied by a small white note with bright red writing.
‘Happy birthday, cherry.’
“I knew they were together!”
You stare out of the windows of Vi’s truck into the town square. Your gaze is fixed on Miss Medarda and Mister Talis, who are sitting suspiciously close to each other on a bench near one of the decorative fountains.
Vi fixes her dark brown hat as a laugh escapes her. “No way, he’s always chatting up this guy– one of the professors at U.P.” Vi refers to her college, and it takes you a second to understand.
“His hand was on her thigh, Violet. That was pure romance.”
Vi pauses, seemingly focused on the road ahead, but the lightbulb look behind her eyes that appears makes you think otherwise. “Yeah, yeah, we’ll see who’s right.” she jokes after remembering she hadn’t responded.
Vibrant sunlight hits almost every inch of the truck and illuminates the town that passes by as the pinkette turns down a road surrounded by greenery. You spin the gifted ring on your finger once, then twice, out of nervousness. It’d been years since you left your house for anything but the doctor’s, let alone a date. A thousand and one possibilities whirled through your mind, but were quickly flushed out at the sound of Vi’s voice.
“I see you got your gift,” she smiles, eyes flicking away from the road down to your ring and back. “I like how it looks on you.”
She was skilled at putting up a flirtatious and unbothered front, because on the inside you had her absolutely melting. Out of all ten options, you chose to secure her gift on your left ring finger.
You’ll be the death of her, no doubt.
“It’s perfect,” you look over to her with hearts in your eyes. “Thanks, cowgirl.”
She nods, eyes flickering back down before she takes her right hand off of the wheel and down to thumb the end of your shorts. “I like these too, real damn pretty.”
You giggle, and somehow the swarm of butterflies in your gut doubles in size, because instead of returning to the wheel, the girl’s hand is delicately placed onto your inner thigh. Her calloused hands gently cup your skin, and she’s grateful you can’t read minds because she’s terrified of your potential reaction.
You can’t fight the smile that crawls its way onto your warm face. The only thought that runs through your mind is how this is even better than the movies.
“Well I hope I’m dressed well enough for whatever we’re doing today. Wish you woulda told me.” You finally reply, softening under her touch. You swear you hear her let out a little sigh of relief.
“That’d ruin the surprise. I’ve gotta wow you.” she sends you a wink and your laughter fills the car with joy.
It doesn’t take long until you’re pulling into the driveway of Violet’s house. It’s beautiful, all brown and white with flowers out front that Powder planted herself, high school graduation yard signs, and fresh open space. Still, a panicked look sets on your face.
“Wait, wait, Vander’s gonna see me– he’ll tell my dad,” you stammer.
Vi cuts the engine, gently taking a hold of your chin to redirect your gaze as she speaks reassuringly. “Hey, hey. He’s not here you worrywart, won’t be home until late tonight.” Your eyes soften and you sigh. “Besides,” she starts, “we’re going over there.”
Just past the house is a matching white and brown barn-esque building. Stables.
“She’s so big!” you yell with awestruck eyes as Vi pulls the red roan out of the stables by the lead. “What’s her name? When’d you get her? Wow I’ve never seen one of these up close, mama was afraid of ‘em and my father doesn’t ride.” You speak at rapid fire making Violet snicker.
“Slow down,” she instructs, standing between you and the hairy beauty. The girl takes your hand, placing it on the horse’s shoulder, giving you the okay to pet. “Her name’s Gunner, she was my fifteenth birthday present, and I can’t imagine your pops getting anywhere near a horse.” You playfully hit her with your unoccupied hand.
“Gunner,” you whisper, “badass.”
Vi chuckles, because swearing sounds so foreign to you.
“You ready?” She asks, slipping her black riding helmet on your head.
“Wait, what?”
“You think I brought you here just to stare at her?” she smirks, completely mesmerized by your face while tightening the straps of the protective gear. “We’ll go slow this time, I promise. Okay?”
The promise of this happening again makes your heart flutter, and all of the gears in your brain stop spinning before you respond, “Okay.”
She helps you onto Gunner, patting the small of your back before hopping up right behind you. Her warm arms snake around your waist and grab hold of the reins in her hands. Her muscular front is smushed against your back, her head placed inches to the right of yours.
“Now, gently squeeze his middle with your calves,” she instructs.
You obey, and the red roan begins its walk. It’s slow, peaceful, but such a new experience to you that a sweet gasp of surprise falls from your lips.
The two of you sit in silence, appreciating the comfort of each others’ presence and warm golden light shining upon you as the beauty of nature captures you. In the green pasture of Vi’s fields, you feel like you’re breathing for the first time in five long years.
Gunner simply walks for a few minutes as you point out pretty flowers that you pass and Violet mentally compiles a bouquet for you. Vi’s talking about her years as a kid in this field. When she’d lost (and found) her favorite toy bunny out here, or dared Mylo to walk through the vast field at the dead of night. Suddenly you’re begging to see some baby photos.
It’s at this moment that everything’s easy. Vi’s admiring everything about you with eyes of love when–
Gunner’s neigh sounds like a shriek of terror when three birds zip past, spooking the roan into a 180 and bolt away before Vi can make it out of her trance.
You yelp from the sudden change in speed, almost slipping off of the animal, but Vi’s there to keep you securely fastened against her as she takes control of it. Just as fast as it changed, Gunner’s speed slows to a stop. You can feel just how tense Vi is as she speaks.
“Shit. I’m so sorry, doll. She gets spooked so easily and– god, I’m sorry for scarin’ you.”
It’s silent for a moment. The scariest moment of the pink haired girl’s life, because she can’t see your twinkling grin that spreads from ear to ear before you laugh.
“That was so cool!” you beam, leaning forward to pat at the horse. “Not so badass though, huh?”
After a few more apologies and you repeatedly telling Vi that it was fine, you two decided it was best to turn in for the day.
You sigh, sitting against the short wooden fence. “I wanna rest for a minute, that okay?” ‘I need to take a rest, I don’t have any energy’ is what you actually mean, but you choose not to worry her.
She wastes no time plopping down onto the grass next to you, eyes raising to the baby blue sky. She gives you a few moments of silence, sneaking glances at your face every so often, before speaking.
“Powder and Claggor were talking about how awesome it’d be if we took you to a Seraphine concert. Think you’d like her music a lot.” she hums, smiling to herself.
“And one day, I'm gonna take you line dancing so we can settle our little debate once and for all.” Her grinning face is inches away from you and her overpowering scent of amber and musk ensues.
“Oh really?” Your voice is soft as your head turns, looking Violet up and down with half-lidded eyes. “I think..”
You quickly mount Vi’s lap, pushing the girl onto her back and pinning those muscular arms right beside her head with both of your hands. You’re both all giggles and grunts, and even though there’s no way you’d stand a chance against her in a real tussle, she lets you win.
You lay there, one atop the other in a field of colors. The tension is so thick that not even a knife could cut it, and your grip softens when tender hands reach up to cup your face, a thumb stroking your cheek. The sun, her hands, her sparkling blue eyes, and the love radiating between the two of you has you all but melting. You’re leaning down, inching closer each second, and just before Vi’s dreams come true, you stop.
You pull back with newly glossy eyes, dismounting the girl while whispering apologies that get lodged in your throat. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry.”
You want nothing more than to connect your lips and hearts, but you were so afraid. How long until she resents you? How long until it’s over? You’d grown accustomed to heartaches, but never heartbreak.
But Violet craves you more than plants crave water, she needs you more than the Earth needs the sun. You just don’t know it.
“Hey,” she whispers, sitting up and holding your chin as if routine. “Look at me, angel.”
You comply with built up tears that threaten to stain your cheeks.
“You don’t have to apologize for something like that,” she consoles, never looking away from your softened eyes. “We can go as slow or as fast as you want, okay?”
You wipe your tears with the side of your hand, choking out your words. “I just– I don’t want to disappoint you.” I don’t want you to hate me once I’m gone.
“Disappoint me?” She stiffles out a laugh. “You don’t know how bad I want you. But I’ll wait until the end of time if you ask me to, hell, I’d lasso the moon and bring it down if you wanted.”
That makes you sniffle and let out a breathy laugh, bringing Violet some relief. The girl slowly inches forward to make sure you’re completely okay with it before placing a warmhearted kiss to your forehead. It’s quick and simple, but causes an eruption of butterflies in your gut. Soon, your troubles are forgotten.
“Let’s get you home, yeah?”
“What’d I say about keeping this door open?” Vi raises a brow, leaning against the doorframe as she stares at an unbothered Powder who’s doing her mascara, and a flustered Ekko.
“Must’ve been the wind.” Powder mutters.
“She wouldn’t listen!” He raises his hands in innocence from his position on a neon pink beanbag.
It’s silent before the three burst out in laughter, and Vi’s shaking her head as they catch their breath.
“Hurry up though, we’re gonna be late to Laurier’s.”
“Not today, Vi.” Vander’s voice bellows from behind her, making her turn her head with furrowed brows. “He gave the five of you a day off.”
A smile graces Ekko’s lips and Powder is whooping in the back, but Vi’s lips drop into a subtle frown.
“Awhh,” Powder coos, “poor Vi doesn’t get to see her girlfriend today, how ever will she live?”
The teens snicker, but the pinkette notices the uneasy look on his face, the one where he has something to say but just can’t spit it out. “What?”
The burly man runs a hand across his beard with a sigh.
“His daughter.” The entire room pauses. “She's terribly ill today, bedridden. He’s staying home to watch over her so there’s no need for far–”
Vander doesn’t get to finish his explanation, because Vi’s pulling the keys from her pocket and rushing past him towards the front door.
It takes almost running three red lights and a long, torturous talk with your father about being able to speak to you just for an hour, but at your bedroom door stands Vi, taking off her hat to look at you with big worried eyes. “Cherry,” she calls out.
You feel absolutely horrendous.
Your breaths are shallow, your ankles feel swollen beyond belief (you thanked god Violet couldn’t see them from under the blanket), and your eyelids weighed a thousand pounds, threatening to drop from fatigue.
“What’s going on? What can I do?” she asks, wasting no time walking over to your pretty bed and taking a seat right next to you.
You shake your pillow-elevated head, laying on your side to face her with a soft smile. “Can’t do anything, it’s just a bad day.” You reach a hand out to grab her calloused one and intertwine your fingers. “Just glad you’re here.”
“How’d you get past my father?” you whisper, relaxing into the soft matter.
Vi huffs out a laugh, readjusting to lay down as she speaks. “Convinced him that I’m extremely knowledgeable in this area because I’m studying to be in the medical field. So he thought it’d be fine if I watched over you while he feeds the cattle.”
You giggle with a teasing look. “Oh yeah, what have you learned?”
“Cherries are good for the heart,” she says all ‘matter of fact’ like. “They have potassium and antioxidants to reduce inflammation.”
“I should be the one calling you cherry, then.” You hum. You don’t know how much it means to Vi to hear that she’s ‘good for you’.
It’s quiet again, and you spend time shamelessly looking over every inch of the girl’s face, landing on her powder-blue orbs. “You know, your children would have some beautiful eyes.”
“And yours would be beautiful all around,” there’s not a trace of doubt in her voice. “What would you name them?” She asks and throws out silly names as you look around in thought, “Batman? Lice? Maddie?”
“How is Maddie as bad as those names?”
“I just don’t like it!”
Your giggles fill the room before you shake your intertwined hand. “Maybe either.. Josie or Clementine? They sound.. warm. Safe.”
Vi nods, pulling you closer into her chest and draping an arm over you that cradles your back, “Josie it is.”
Your ears burn as you nuzzle into her. “And we’ll live in a big pretty house in the city, surrounded by noise and culture and life.” You wished so badly.
“We?” Vi asks.
“Me, Josie… and you.” You look up at her with the last of your body’s strength. “If you’ll join us.”
That spark in Violet’s stomach has grown to a full fire heating her body. Her dream girl’s lying in her arms, talking her ears off about their hypothetical future together, all while looking up at her with pupils blown wide as if she’s your knight in shining armor.
“Of course,” she agrees, “but we’ll have to bring Rusty and Gunner along.”
You snicker with a nod. “Sounds perfect.”
There’s a glint in the girl’s eyes as she trails her hand up your back to the soft skin of your face. “A pretty house, an adorable daughter, my rascal animals,” you let out a weak laugh, “and my pretty girl to share it all with.”
Your heart skips a beat. “Yours?” you tease.
“Yeah, mine.”
She’s tracing meaningless patterns on your neck with one hand while tucking a piece of hair behind your ear with the other. And god, whatever this feeling is it’s too good, too sweet, too sensual. Your waiting lips are slightly agape in awe, and it doesn’t take long before Vi whispers, “Can I?”
This time, ‘yes’ is the only word that pops into your brain and slips from your mouth as Vi’s lips crash into yours.
Her lips are melting into yours with so much intensity that it’s hard to keep up. You let her take the lead while your scents, minds, and tongues mix together in a bundle of passion. Her grip around you never loosens. Fingers thread through your hair, and her slightly chapped lips dread leaving yours, because your kisses are the air she needs to breathe.
A whine falls from you when she reluctantly pulls away from your sweet mouth, placing four chaste kisses on your cheeks, nose, and forehead.
“You need to rest,” she coos, peppering your forehead with another (much needed) kiss, and keeping the close proximity as her arms wrap around you. There’s no argument, because the adrenaline rush from her kiss is wearing off and that wave of exhaustion snakes its way back.
There you lay, bodies intertwined and souls tying as the sound of Vi’s healthy heartbeat lulls you to sleep.
Once you’re out, you stay sound asleep as Vi hesitantly leaves your bed.
You stay sound asleep as she trots downstairs where your father places weights of guilt upon her, claiming he knows you two have been sneaking around, and it’s her fault you’re in this current state.
You stay sound asleep as he demands she doesn’t return to the farm, permanently.
With every inch of your worn down heart, you hate Violet Lane.
And while deep down you know that’s not the slightest bit true, you still act like it.
When you woke up the next day, the birds singing and a beaming face as you skipped downstairs to hug your father good morning, the last thing you expected was to hear the all too confusing news that Vi had quit. Along with the rest of her siblings and friend just an hour after.
Unfortunately, you were none the wiser, and slowly sulked up the stairs and sank into your bed where you cried yourself back to sleep.
For the first couple days, it didn’t make sense. The way she looked at you with those big puppy dog eyes, her tender care, the ways she spoke to and about you, it all seemed so real. It had to be real.
On day three, you decided that acting was just one of her many skills.
By day four, you had it figured out, or so you thought. Vi was a flirtatious asshole who wanted nothing more than some street credit for kissing the untouchable, locked up, sick princess right under her overbearing father’s nose. Coming to and believing such a conclusion felt like a stab in the side, and the knife only twisted when you factored in the fact that the others must’ve known about this, which is why they left alongside her.
You thought you’d become accustomed to all of the heart pains in the world, but you were wrong.
Tears fell from your eyes like a waterfall until they grew dry, your baking pans yearned to be used but were shoved away into a cabinet, and what hurt the most was knowing your father was right for keeping you locked up all these years. You weren’t free, but you were safe.
Finally, on day five, you’re engulfed by the plush matter of your couch when there’s six knocks at the door and someone’s calling out for you: “Cherry?”
You scoff at her audacity.
When you storm over and yank open the door with the meanest glare Vi’s ever seen from the prettiest girl she knows, you’re met with Ekko leaning against your white picket fence with his arms crossed, Powder standing next to him with a worried face, Claggor and Mylo relaxed against Vi’s bright red truck, and said truck-driver right in front of you looking absolutely sick.
And you slam the door right in her backstabbing face.
“Seriously?” Vi huffs out, earning a stifled laugh and whistle from Mylo.
“Go away, Violet.” You yell through the door, voice the sternest she’s ever heard.
“Fuck no. What’s going on?”
“Why don’t you tell me?” you counter, back pressed against your barrier. “You got all that you wanted from me, and then you quit and disappear from my life. So why are you back, huh?”
You’re lucky you’re packed with pent up anger, because tears are bubbling in the corners of your eyes and yelling is the only thing keeping them from spilling over.
“What?” the pinkette's completely taken aback, because she has no clue what you’re on about.
“That’s not–” she sighs, lowering her voice before speaking. “I’ll never get enough of you. I’d take a thousand kisses and so, so much more if you’d let me, but that’s not why I see you, angel.”
Your eyes soften and hurt brows furrow because damn, she’s a good actress.
“And I didn’t quit. That afternoon when you fell asleep, your old man practically dragged me out of your house and fired me. Said I caused your symptoms to worsen. I thought I’d lay low for a few days– and believe me when I say these were the hardest days of my life, but I didn’t want to get you in any trouble.”
Your bottom lip is bitten red until you finally cave, creeping the door open just enough to show your face.
“You promise?” you ask, and Violet’s heart is aching.
“Cross my heart.” she replies.
That’s all it takes for you to swing the door open and jump into her arms. She stumbles back in surprise before applying the same force, arms wrapping around your waist as she melts into yours cradling her neck.
You’re sniffling, taking deep breaths before you speak. “Really thought you left me,” you croak out.
“You’re not getting rid of me that easily.” she teases, placing a tender kiss on your forehead as you giggle and blink away tears.
“Now go get changed, we’re going out,” a grin tugs at the corner of her lips when your happy eyes make contact with hers. You blink, an idea flashing across your face, before pulling her inside by the wrist, yelling “just a minute!” to the others, before hastily shutting the door.
Violet’s eyes graze over every last atom of your body as your hips sway in front of her, babbling with Powder about who knows what, because she hasn’t been focused since you dragged her into your bedroom ‘innocently’ needing help with your outfit.
She stood in your doorway curiously, thinking she’d only be there for a second, maybe you’d never been to a rodeo and needed advice.
That was, until you paused at your walk in closet, a cheeky smirk on your lips that Vi desperately wanted to taste as you nod your head towards the bed. “Sit.”
And she obeyed, manspread legs at the edge of your bed as you walk infront of her with a few items on white hangers. All frills, lace, denim skirts and shorts, and Vi’s reasonably concluded she died and went to heaven.
“I could wear..” you shift the hangers around, “this with this skirt, or maybe these shorts and.. ooh, these boots match my panties.” You get a rise out of seeing the usually suave girl short circuit at the words that bless her ears. Definitely in heaven.
But Vi came to the realization that she was, in fact, alive. Because her heart truly stopped beating when she helped you settle on your pieces, threw her a sugary sweet “thanks, Vi,” did a casual 180, and stuck your ass out to drag your skirt down painfully slow.
Oh, those boots do match your panties.
Now here you stand in a lacy red top, denim shorts that have her thanking god for your creation, and matching cherry red cowgirl boots that graced her eyes the first day you met.
Neverending chatter fills your ears from other attendees, the overwhelming scent of kettle popcorn from a nearby booth stuffs your nostrils, and you see Ekko nudge at Vi, saying something that you can’t hear over the bluenette beside you talking your ear off about the stunning horses she sees.
Suddenly, Vi’s walking up to you and smushing her hat onto your head with her famous smirk. “Keep it safe for me, doll?”
You nod mindlessly, a hand coming up to fix its position on your head.
“Where ya goin’?” Powder calls out to the platinum blonde boy who’s ushering Vi to hurry up.
“Our annual face off,” he throws her a wink, and the girl’s rolling her eyes with a playful scoff.
Before you can even ask, she’s locking arms with you and dragging you along to an even more crowded area. There’s various groups of people surrounding a blocked off area containing a big, black, circular inflatable mat. And directly in the middle is a mischievous brown mechanical bull.
“Are they..” and your question is deemed useless when Ekko mounts the hairy machine, pumping his hands up in motion for the crowd to whoop and holler. Of course, they do.
Ekko does good, to say the least.
One hand grips the bull while the other is thrown up into the air as the machine thrashes him and his white locs every which way. The intensity increases as it tauntingly speeds up, thrashing harder, and spinning recklessly. Finally, he’s bucked off, rolling to a stand and flashing his pearly whites as the crowd cheers.
A giggle falls from your mouth as your hip nudges Powder who’s in complete awe, and she warms in embarrassment.
Vi and Ekko fake tension, sending joking competitive glares as they switch places. Now it’s the pink haired cowgirl that’s mounting the mechanical animal.
You never thought you’d be admiring this sort of thing, but Violet’s never fails to twist your stomach in knots.
With a hand gripping the bull and the other resting on the back of her head, she bucks her hips back and forth to counter the thrashing machine. She’s focused, her sculpted muscles flexing as she holds on tight, but a cocky smile is plastered on her face with teeth biting down on her rosy lips.
Surrounding girls (including yourself) are wooing at the sight.
Vi makes it through the most chaotic shakes and spins as the bull finally comes to a controlled stop, and you’re cheering louder than you ever thought you could.
“Woo! Hell yeah!” you cry out. The girl’s cheesing harder than ever when she hears your support, and the smile lasts all the way over to a fake booing Ekko who rolls his eyes and slips her a twenty dollar bill from his pocket.
You and Powder unlock arms to move over to the riders. A chuckle of amusement spills from you, and you’re securing Violet’s hat back over her fluffy hair. “That was real impressive, cowgirl.”
“Yeah?” she coos.
“Yeah.” The atmosphere grows heavier, each of your eyes searching the other’s like there’s treasure to find. But your little staring contest as Claggor speaks.
“Earth to lovebirds,” he hums politely. “You coming?”
You’re quick to nod, but Vi gently holds your wrist, making you pause. “Actually, I wanted to show cherry around some more. Catch up later?” She asks, but she’s already pulling you away before Claggor nods in agreement and the group goes in the opposite direction as you.
You speed up, feet coming into step with the girl who’s needily pulling you. Her silent prayers are answered when she spots a more secluded area behind a building and some fences.
“Vi,” you snicker, cheeks warming in nervousness, “what are we doing?”
She hums through half lidded orbs, hands finding their place on your hips and hastily pushing you against the wall that covers the two of you from the eyes of others. You’re looking up at her with the sweetest glint in your eyes and it’s driving her absolutely mad.
“You said I was real impressive, right?” Her voice is smoother, breathier.
Ohh.
You tilt your head, teeth chewing on your abused bottom lip before you mutter. “That’s right.. think you deserve a reward, huh?”
“Exactly what I was thinkin’, sweetheart.”
The newfound nickname is sending a shiver up your spine that transforms into a blazing warmth when Vi’s lips fit into yours like puzzle pieces. This time, messy limbs are thrown over each other. Your hand travels from her hands that are cradling your heated face, down to her abs (making her shiver as you scrape your nails across), to tangle in what pink locks aren’t captured by her hat.
A strong hand makes its way around your waist, pulling you dangerously closer to rub against her body. God, she’s good at this.
“Vi..” you’re finally able to whisper as she trails kisses along your jaw and down to your neck. You can feel her smirk against the area where she peppers you with affection.
And it’s perfect.
Not just the way she’s kissing you, or the fact that you’re kissing at all. It’s the environment, the feelings, the friendships that you’ve made with the others, the fact that for today, you’re living a normal life. It’s the fact that for a moment, you can cheer on your friends in a competition, you can lock arms with a friend and woo over others, you can get lost in passionate kisses with a girl and not have another care in the world.
You wished it could stay this way forever.
You lose all sense of shame, letting a soft grunt slip from your lips at the feeling of teeth and a ‘pop’ on your neck. It’s only a matter of seconds before both of your eyes widen and Vi’s pulling back with a crooked smile on her face.
“Did you..”
She wordlessly eyes the red-purple love bite forming on the back-side of your neck, just below your ear.
“Violet!” you drag out with a whine, sending her into a soft fit of laughter. She feels guilty, but you’re just too cute.
You have a love-hate relationship with the neon lights that are beaming throughout the spacious room that brings more noise than you’ve heard in the past five years– maybe more than your entire life.
On one hand, the flashing colors are starting to give you a major headache. On the other, the red glow that decorates Violet’s face as she grins down at you has your insides doing summersaults.
Nevermind. You love the lights.
“C’mon y’all,” Powder calls out with a chipper expression. Ekko’s standing properly in line and his blue haired companion, who’s already freestyling, spins out of control and squeals up a storm.
“You ready?” Vi’s words kiss your ear as she holds both of your hands, pulling you out to the dance floor.
“Are you?”
Your sass has her laughing, and she brings her tongue out to wet her bottom lip. “Follow my lead, cherry.”
And for a few moments, you do. All of the surrounding crowd dances the same to the upbeat, fast-paced country song that pierces your ears, so you replicate Vi’s mixed steps and cute little head tilts with her hand on that chocolate hat.
But then the song changes, it’s more passion filled and fiery. All it takes is Powder spinning out of line and shamelessly making her own moves before you’re formulating the steps in your head. From movies you watched religiously to mindlessly shuffling your own feet late at night, you danced for the little girl who longed to have fun, who longed to be free.
You’re clicking the heels of your boots against the ground, moving your hips as fluid as water, and bringing your hands up just for them to slide down your sides with a heart-stopping smile tugging at your lips.
Violet’s in awe, because her girl’s fearless and full of smiles, and she couldn’t be happier for you.
And there’s no doubt in her mind that this is the only girl she’ll ever want, need, crave.
She whistles, looking up and down with the most amused expression you’ve ever encountered. “Jesus, alright you win, doll.”
“Yeah?” The tease comes out a bit breathless, but you play it off as dancing too wildly.
You look at the pink haired beauty through thick lashes. Inching dangerously closer as you sway, Violet’s hands have a powerful hold on your soft waist. You stumble over your feet once, then twice, and she notices.
“Slow down there cowgirl,” she chuckles, but her gaze is tender under the carefree mask. “You alright?”
It’s unbearably toasty in the room, and you feel two times hotter with each passing second. But you don’t want it to end, so you wave her off, throwing out an “I’m good!”
But you’re not, and it’s evident on your face when the small ‘headache’ turns to tight pressure smothering your scalp, and you’re losing your balance as you search for an exit.
“I just need some air,” you mumble, turning your head. The room shifted under your feet, vision blurring in a haze. You took three measly steps forward, and on your fourth, you crumbled.
Your body gives out under you, and Vi’s right there to catch you when it does. Her arms snake around your waist to hold you up before she lifts you in her arms with big eyes and wavering lips.
“Shit. Ekko, come here! Powder, go get Mylo and Claggor.”
The five haul ass to Vi’s truck, the pinkette tossing her keys to Ekko as he and Mylo hop in the front. She, Claggor, and Powder take seats in the bed of the truck. When you finally come to, your back is laid against Vi’s worrisome chest, and you get the fresh air you were looking for from the speed Ekko’s driving to get you home.
But when you pull into the driveway of your home, there’s already a car waiting for you, and there stands your father with his arms crossed and pure fury in his eyes.
And you’re in so much fucking trouble.
The others attempt to plead your case, in good ways and in bad, as the man scolds everyone in sight.
“Mister, we just went out to dance.”
“She’s not a child you know, you can’t keep her cooped up here forever.”
“Please just understand.”
Everything goes in one ear and out the other, because in the chaos silently sits you and Violet. You’re still breathless, and this headache is gonna last longer than you want it to, but you relax into the warmth of Vi for one last time.
You pull back, ignoring the spike of pain that flashes across your brain, and turn to the girl with a tight lipped smile. “I’m sorry, you guys should just go.”
She looks pained, like she wants to say something, she wants to help. But she nods, placing a chaste kiss to your temple just as you’re sliding out of the truck bed and over to your father. He hastily drags you inside while you bid farewell to your moping knights.
With every inch of your worn down heart, you love Violet Lane.
And you’re not an idiot, you’re sure she loves you too.
That’s what makes coming to a conclusion impossible on almost every level.
Your physical heart says this is the most idiotic decision you’ve made in your entire life. You’ve had worse symptoms than normal, you’re putting yourself in danger in the name of ‘fun’, and the thought that’s lingering in the back of everyone’s mind is one you can’t ignore: just how long will you make it?
Your mental heart says this is the best thing you’ve ever done. You’re happy, you’re in love, you have real friends, and you’re finally starting to see the point in living. Not just from a tv screen or the books your father supplies, but through your own eyes and experiences. And even though your father seemed overbearing, you know he’s afraid. He’s taken on all of the worry and stress so that you don’t have to. If you wanted something to change, you had to take the leap yourself. But you’re not sure you can.
There’s six knocks at the door, and you stay seated in your position on the couch. “It’s open,” you call out.
The clack of familiar boots enter the room, and a wave of musk and amber suffocate you when Vi walks past you to sit at your side.
It’s silent. Not your comfortable, daydream filled state of silence that Vi could watch you in forever. It’s awkward, strangulating silence, and she can’t take it.
“Yesterday was..”
“...amazing.” “A mistake.”
You speak at the same time, eyes flickering at each other's response.
“What are you talking about?” Vi asks, setting her textbooks down. You don’t miss the newfound waver in the back of her voice.
You don’t respond. You don’t want to go through with this conversation.
“..Is this about the hickey?” she flashes a strained smile, “I’m sorry if he saw it, doll. Reall–”
“This isn’t a joke, Violet.” you finally speak, eyes strictly trained down on your fiddling hands in your lap. The tears are bubbling at your eyelids and that itchy, sore feeling is crawling its way up your throat.
“Then what is it about? You and your dad? Look, I can talk to him, I’ll make things right.” Her voice is increasingly wavered, desperate, scared.
“Our–” you inhale a shaky breath, “– this, us, whatever we are is an inconvenience. An inconvenience to my father, an inconvenience to my health, an inconvenience to you.” Your voice breaks with the last word. “I’m a burden Violet, face it.”
You can’t see it with the tears blurring your vision, but Vi’s shaking her head in horror. “No. No, what are you going on about? You aren–”
“God just face it, Vi. All you wanted was to love a girl and you got a defective one.” You spit the words out like they sting on your tongue. “Soon, you’ll be annoyed by everything I can’t do and bored of everything I can.”
“Maybe we’re just not…” you can’t continue as silent tears transform into quiet little sobs.
Vi’s heart aches as she kneels down on the floor in front of you, examining your now puffy eyes and tear stained cheeks. She wants nothing more than to kiss the pain away, but first she has to fix that worrisome little mind of yours.
One hand intertwines with your anxious ones, and the other reaches up as rough fingers delicately hold your chin, a soft thumb rubs back and forth against your cheek. She whispers out your name with a voice that’s holding back sadness of her own. When you’re finally ready to look at her, she smiles delicately.
“You don’t know how bad I want you. But I’ll wait until the end of time if you ask me to. I’d lasso the moon and bring it down for you if you asked.” You recognize her sweet words from your first date, and you’re weakly melting into the palm of her hand that’s sliding to cup your face.
“I meant it then, and I mean it now,” she whispers. “I will never be annoyed by what you can or can’t do– god, I'd sit here and talk to you about slugs all day everyday if that’s what you really wanted.” That has you scoffing, fighting back a smile at her silly words.
“Love isn’t about the activities you can or can’t do, it’s about a connection, our connection, and what we do with it. So, you can get rid of me if this is all true and that’s what you really want, but I will never stop loving you.” She’s speaking so sweetly, and before she even finishes her sentence you’ve made up your mind.
“You’re good for my heart, cherry.”
Those are the last words she can get out before you’re throwing yourself forward and locking lips with the love of your life.
It starts off slow, soft, an apology for the rollercoaster of emotions and blunder of nonsense you put yourselves through. Then, Vi’s hands are cupping your face and the back of your head while yours are thrown around her neck. It’s needier, sloppier, and her tongue slipping into your mouth shows it’s moved from an apology to ‘let me make you feel better’.
You hum into the kisses with pleasure, but you wanted more. Needed more. Without hesitation, you slip a hand under Vi’s tight t-shirt, running a hand up and down her abs.
The action sends a shiver down her spine, and you gasp in surprise when the sculpted girl wraps your legs around her waist and lifts you into her arms.
You’re giggling as she walks up the stairs and into your bedroom. Your litter smooches down her jaw and to that neglected neck, mimicking what she’s done for you. Vi slips a hand under the back of your shirt, making you hum into her neck at the warmth.
Pop.
A devilish grin graces your angelic face when you pull back, eyes flickering from Violet’s to the bruise on her neck.
The girl grins, catching your mouth in a wet kiss. “You’re asking for more, y’know,” she warns, and her lustful eyes are turning your brain to mush.
“Good. I want more. Need you all over me,”
Your confident words are canceled out by a sweet gasp that leaves you when Vi bucks her hips.
“You’ve gotta say it then,” she orders.
“Say.. what?”
She chuckles. “Tell me what you want, baby.”
You swear there’s a pool of slick in your underwear.
“Want you to fuck me till I cum, please please please,” you beg, hiding in the crook of her neck.
“Fuck,” is all she can choke out, because she’s never wanted wanted a girl this fucking much. Your begging is all she needs to hear before she’s stripping you out of your top, unclasping your pretty bra with one hand, and flipping you over onto your back.
You’re throwing your head back with a soft moan, running a hand through her pink strands while Vi latches onto one of your rock hard nipples. Her hand trails down your abdomen and to your pretty little skirt. The fabric slides down your legs and off your delicate ankles, and the girl’s gawking at your panties.
“Vi, please please,” you moan in impatience.
She lets out a cruel chuckle, fingertips pulling down the fabric that’s completely drenched by your arousal.
Holy fuck.
She’s moving faster now, pulling her shirt over her head, and you don’t have a chance to drool over her bare muscles as she sits against the headboard of the bed and pulls you back by your hips into her lap.
Your back’s pressed against her chest, and she pulls your legs apart making cool air attacking your lips. One arm hooks under your knee and holds tight, making sure you stay perfectly spread for her.
“Suck,” she whispers, and two of her calloused fingers are shoved in your mouth. You swirl your tongue around the nubs, letting drool pool around them as Vi looks down at you like she wants to ravish you.
“Wanted to touch you like this for so long.”
Her fingers are dragging out of your mouth and down to your sensitive slit to your swollen clit. You’re already messily bucking your hips against her as she pushes soft circles against your bundle of nerves.
She relishes in the way your eyes roll back before she decides she’s done being a tease, sinking her wet fingers into you three full knuckles deep.
“Violet– holy fuck yesyesyes,” you whine, quickly closing your legs at the newfound pleasure. But Vi’s pulling them right back apart as she pumps into you faster.
She peppers kisses on your temple, whispering sweet nothings about how you’re ‘so damn pretty’ and she’s been dying to see your ‘fucked out face’.
“Yeah, oh fuuck.” you squirm under her control, a knot of passion and pleasure building in your gut.
“Yeah? Yeah, baby?” She speaks breathily. The way she’s mocking you and the depth her fingers are reaching is sending you right over the edge. Your toes curl while writhing pleasure shoots through your body, and all you can see is stars.
“Fuck fuck, I’m– hah,”
Vi’s shushing you softly, keeping her speed and strength as your cunt tightens around her fingers.
Your moans are like angels blessing your ears as you cum, gushing on her skilled fingers.
The only noises in the room are your exhausted pants, the slick of your cunt as Vi pulls her fingers out terribly slow, and the bed shifting under the absence and reappearance of pure muscle.
Except this time, the pinkette’s knelt in front of the bed.
She pulls you to the edge by the soft skin of your thighs, and piercing blue eyes joined by a warm pink tongue threaten to have you wheel-chair bound by morning.
“Let me clean you up, angel.”
Despite being near nothing but muscle, Vi’s bare body is incredibly comfortable.
“And he made a giant splotch of paint on the wall with his ass.”
You gasp, choking out a little giggle of shock as Vi tells you stories of her childhood, specifically all the stupid situations they got themselves into. The just-right bath water is engulfing your intertwined bodies. Vi’s fingers are threading through your hair as your head rests on her shoulder. Your body sits in between her legs, and your arms lazily drape around her waist.
“How mad was Vander?” you ask.
“He just… laughed. I’ve never really seen him mad, just disappointed at times.” She shrugs. “He knows kids make stupid mistakes, learn, and grow.”
You hum, nuzzling further into her. “I hope I’m that calm when I’m a mom,”
You pause.
“If I’m a mom.”
That strikes right through Violet’s swollen heart, and she shakes her head, holding you a little closer.
“You’re gonna be perfect.” She reassures. “Josie.. Gunner.. Rusty, Daisy, and our big beautiful city house are going to be so lucky to have you. I’m so lucky to have you. Never gettin’ rid of me.
You smile against her skin, placing a loving kiss.
“Even if it takes ages for my pops to understand?” you mutter.
“I don’t care if it takes a millennium.” she states confidently, a tender kiss graces your forehead before she looks you in the eyes.
“I love you, cherry.”
And this time, you’re done holding back.
“I love you, Violet.”
Your fingers, hearts, and lips intertwined as you share your most passionate kiss yet, one of the many for years to come.
Five years, to be exact.
And five years later, as the blood refuses to circulate throughout your body and your heart ceases to beat, you die in Violet's arms.
Through her sobs and shattered heart, she can only smile at the fact that all the way until your death, she helped you truly live.
silknspice
#vi x reader#vi arcane#arcane fanfic#arcane#vi fanfic#vi smut#wlw#sapphic#vi imagines#arcane vi x reader#vi league of legends
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The Proposal || Gregory House
Paring: Gregory House x fem!reader
Summary: House is going to propose to you but your nail color is not what he was expecting
Warnings: swearing
Word Count: 0.5k
P.s. based off a request by anonymous
༶•┈┈୨♡୧┈┈•༶༶•┈┈୨♡୧┈┈•༶༶•┈┈୨♡୧┈┈•༶
"Bright fucking green! Out of all the colors she could have chosen, she chooses bright green!" Wilson could only watch as his best friend loses his mind.
"Why would she choose now to venture out of her comfort zone! She's had some funky colors before, but BRIGHT FUCKING GREEN!?" House paces the room, as best he can, occasionally swinging his cane around wildly.
Wilson can only feel pity for his friend and a tad bit of guilt. He was the one who told House to make sure you got your nails done before he proposed to you. He was scolded by his ex about not warning her before and he just wanted his best friend to have a better proposal than he did.
He never thought this would be the outcome. "Why don't you just tell her to get them done again? This time something a little more tame.'" House stops mid-pace pondering the suggestion before shaking his head and collapsing onto Wilson's couch.
"I can't. She likes them too much and she was so proud of herself for going outside of her comfort zone. It would crush her if I told her to change to her normal color." Wilson shakes his head at his friend, glad that he actually is considering your feelings, but knowing House is going to find an elaborate way to make you change them. Most likely hurting your feelings even more than if he was to tell you.
Luckily, House did not have to create an elaborate plan as you walked in with a fresh new set of nails. "There you are! I've been looking for you everywhere!" House sits up as you come bounding over to him holding up your hands to show your very natural looking nails. "What do ya think?"
House looks from your face to your nails before pulling you down onto his lap. You yelp in surprise and try to avoid his bad leg as you are manhandled into a straddling position on top of him.
"I love you so much." Another yelp leaves your mouth as House smashes his lips onto yours. You pull back slightly panting and questioning his actions.
"All I did was change my nail color." He pulls you back in for another kiss that continues until Wilson clears his throat. "As much as I love to watch you guys make out, I would rather get back to my work." Taking the hint you shimmy off of House's lap and start for the door.
"Why did you change the color?" You turn back to face House who hasn't moved from his spot on the couch.
You smirk at him, "I couldn't let you propose to me while I had bright green nails, duh." House lets out a little chuckle and you watch Wilson's jaw drop before opening the door and bidding them goodbye.
#x reader#greg house x reader#gregory house#gregory house x reader#hate crimes md#house md#x fem! reader#x fem!reader#gregory house x fem! reader
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TW: Cursing, negging, misogyny, sexually suggestive, maybe explicit?
"Are you really going to eat all that?" He asked, his face not really bothering to hide his disdain towards my meal.
I popped another french fry into my mouth and gave an exaggerated mmm before replying.
"Yeah, what did you think I mean when I said 'we should get some burgers and shakes'?"
"I just thought you were going to get, like, a salad."
This may be the worst date I've ever been on, but no way I'm going to let some guy ruin this delicious food.
"It's whatever, I guess," he continued, "So do you like heroes?"
Oh okay so he's making an effort to get to know me. Maybe he's not so bad.
"I love heroes! I think my favorites are probably Eraser," I said thoughtfully, "and Dynamight."
He hummed in response. Not a thoughtful hum, or an inquisitive one. One of those condescending hums. I sighed after finishing off my burger and washing it down with some vanilla milkshake.
"What now?"
"No, nothing."
I gave him a hard stare.
"I just think it's interesting that your favorite heroes are men. Aren't you like, a feminist?" He questioned.
I was stunned.
"Do you...do you think I'm going to fuck Dynamight?"
He shrugged and mumbled something I didn't quite catch, but quite frankly I was over it. I grabbed my food tray to toss the empty cartons and he dumped his onto it as well, without a single word of please, thank you, or asking to do the favor of throwing his trash out.
Once that was done, I excused myself to the restroom to freshen up and upon my return, saw there were two receipts at the table. One paid for, one not, so I went over to the register to pay for my meal. The girl ringing me up asked me if all was okay in the way only us girls could really communicate, and I gave a shrug.
"It's rough out here"
She nodded in agreement and wished me luck.
I turned around and he was waiting by the door, so I went to bid him farewell. Before I could reach him, he walked out the door and just as I was about to walk through, it nearly slammed in my face, making me jump.
Frustrated, I pushed through, ignoring him, and started walking to my car. It looked like there was a small crowd gathering half a block down from where I'd parked, so at least I wouldn't be completely alone in this rough part of town.
Soon enough, I heard footsteps behind me and it was him. Walking me to it was the least he could do after this poor excuse for a date, so at least there's that.
"We going to your place, or mine?"
Again, I was stunned. The noise behind me got louder but I was too focused on what this idiot was implying.
"Uhh, hello?," he started snapping his fingers in my face, "are we going to your place, or mine?" He asked again, slowly but loudly.
"Boy, what the hell are you talking about?" He looked behind me and then back at me about to say something, but I wasn't going to let this loser waste anymore of my time, "Do you really think after pulling that 'negging' bullshit on me, I'd still sleep with you? Why would anyone in their right mi-"
OOF! Something rammed into me and I heard an incredibly loud crashing sound and lost all thought for a moment.
I suddenly realized I was being carried in someone's arms, before being carefully set down by the idiot I was desperatly trying to get away from.
"Are you fucking stupid or something? Did you not hear everyone telling you to get your girlfriend out of the way? Or did you not see the giant fucking boulder about to crush her?"
None other than Dynamight was bitching at my date for leaving me in harm's way, right after he himself saved me.
There's no way this is really happening.
The moron stood there for a moment looking like he was going to cry, then tried to act cool.
"Oh, look, it's the dickhead hero from the news trying to be positive for a change."
Dynamight looked at him incredulously, and for a second, I thought his hands started to glow before he shook them off.
"Yeah, and I bet your bitch is my biggest fan."
Dumbass stood there looking like, well, a dumbass. What else could he say though?
"You're right!" I burst out laughing, "I told him your one of my favorite heroes just a minute ago"
This made Dynamight smile at me, while I pointed at the guy and corrected, "I'm not his bitch though. That was the worst date ever"
The hero raised an eyebrow before looking me up and down, before glancing over to the guy and tutting.
"You really fumbled her? Bigger idiot than I could've thought"
My cheeks turned red, but this gave me the encouragement I needed.
"Aw Dynamight, you're making me blush. Actually, I was wondering what time you're done patrolling so we could...go back to my place?" I asked, wiggling my eyebrows at him.
His smile was back, and he gave a quick glance over at the clocktower not too far from us before saying he was actually off now, just needed to finish helping arrest the criminals that were causing the commotion when he saved me.
"Whatever man! She's a fatass anyway!" The loser shouted at us.
The blonde reached his hand out to me. Confused, I took it, and he guided me into doing a couple of spins while his eyes ran up and down my body again before stopping, bringing my hand to his lips and kissing it.
"That ass is fantastic."
And that, friends, is how I ended up fucking Pro Hero Dynamight.
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Do not copy, repost, translate, plagiarize, and process in any way, shape, or form, including through AI.
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A/N: Got this idea from watching this video by fan0fthearts (yt/ig/tt). Many more to come because their art and concepts are amazing.
Also, I know this is terribly written but I needed to get it out of my head. Hopefully will rewrite/fix in the future
#bakugou katsuki#bakugou x reader#bakugou x you#bnha bakugou#mha bakugou#mha#bakugo#bnha#my hero academia
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Scarborough Fair 9/?
Yes, it's true. You aren't dreaming. I am finally updating this long-neglected fic! Not only that, but I will be finishing it. As a matter of fact, you will have an update every day this week. If anyone still cares, that is, lol. I know the fandom isn't what it once was. However, I suddenly got inspired again to finish this. So whether or not anyone reads it, it's getting the resolution it deserves. Why did I neglect it for so long? Writer's block. I just haven't written hardly a thing in at least a year, probably longer. So when I laid awake, unable to sleep because I was finishing this fic in my head, I was ecstatic. That's why I'm finishing it whether anyone reads it or not. Of course, if you are still reading it, may I politely suggest commenting? It definitely feeds the muse!
Rest assured, there will be an update tomorrow. I don't have much going on tomorrow, and I actually planned more in this chapter originally. So be looking out for that!
Much thanks to the two biggest fans of this fic, Krystal @kmomof4 and Marta @snowbellewells - re-reading your reblogs of this fic helped kick me back into high gear!
And as an extra treat, here is a picture of Emma's wedding dress in this chapter:
Summary: Seventeen-year-old Emma Swan has had a charmed life, despite being a foster child. She has a wonderful family who loves her, and the best friends in the world. The only thing that mars her idyllic existence is her birth mother: a homeless woman who mutters nonsensical rhymes and claims to be Snow White. One fateful night, however, Emma’s world is shattered. Perhaps her mother’s rhymes aren’t nonsense after all.
Rated: M for date rape, dubious consent, teen pregnancy, and sexy times (the good kind!)
Words: Over 1k in this chapter
Chapter One | Two | Three | Four | Five | Six | Seven | Eight
Also on Ao3
Tagging: (let me know if you wish to be removed or added): @snowbellewells @teamhook @kmomof4 @jrob64 @xhookswenchx-reads-blog @thisonesatellite @welllpthisishappening @spartanguard @ohmakemeahercules @tiganasummertree @sparlecorn93 @sals86 @pirateprincessofpizza @xarandomdreamx @zaharadessert @huntressandlioness1 @jamif @undercaffinatednightmare @onceratheart18 @sparlecorn93 @sals86 @pirateprincessofpizza @xarandomdreamx @zaharadessert @huntressay
Liam and Ingrid, unsurprisingly, had concerns when they came home to Emma and Killian announcing their engagement. Anna, unsurprisingly, was bouncing up and down with joy.
“Are you sure you’re proposing for the right reasons?” Was their main question for Killian.
“Well, the main reason is I love her,” he told them with conviction, “but it’s also the timing. She needs me. I know deep in my bones I was always meant to be her husband, so if she needs me now, why wait?”
“Are you sure you aren’t just accepting out of fear? Because it’s safe?” Was their main question for Emma.
Emma’s answer was delivered with just as much conviction. “It isn’t just that I feel safe with Killian; I love him. Shouldn’t love feel safe, anyway? And I feel the same way he does. If we waited five more years, or ten, or twenty, nothing would change. We’re meant to be together.”
Liam and Ingrid couldn’t pretend to be surprised. Both of them had noticed a soulmate type of connection between Emma and Killian for a long time. They also couldn’t deny the logic of the decision when it came to Emma’s security and the baby’s. There was only one other concern.
“What about school?”
“I can finish high school married just as well as I can single,” Emma told them with a shrug, and Killian vowed he wouldn’t get in the way of her education.
“But Boston College, Killian?”
He squared his shoulders and looked his brother dead in the eyes. “I won’t be returning. I’ve already told my boss he can count on me full time with the construction company. He’s promoting me to a foreman position, so I can easily support Emma. When the baby’s a little older, I can enroll at Red Oak and get my degree there.”
Liam wanted to argue, but there really wasn’t anything wrong with Killian’s plan. Lots of people worked a year or two, or longer, before getting a degree. He wanted to say that Boston College was a lot more prestigious than Red Oak, but he knew full well it was a pretty weak argument. Killian would save a lot of money by transferring to Red Oak, not to mention gaining job experience. He let out a long breath and shared a meaningful look with his wife.
“Well okay, then,” she said, her signature grin filling her face, “let’s plan a wedding!”
*******************************************************
A date was set for mid-August, giving Emma two weeks between the wedding and the first day of her senior year. Unfortunately, Elsa wouldn’t be back from her study abroad program in time for the ceremony. It also gave them only three weeks to throw a wedding together. Thankfully, neither Emma nor Killian were big on grand ceremonies.
The first item on Ingrid’s checklist was the venue. The bride and groom solved that easily: their own living room. Anna and Ingrid - and Elsa via Zoom - tried to protest that it was too small, but Emma just shrugged them off.
“We can just pull out all the furniture and line up folding chairs. It’s not like we’re inviting that many people.”
Ingrid was concerned that the second item, the dress, would be impossible. Fate, however, seemed to be in their favor. Emma found a vintage dress that suited her personality perfectly at a thrift store downtown. She hadn’t even been dress shopping that day. Ingrid had taken her for ice cream after one of her prenatal appointments, and they had decided to stroll around the square with their ice cream cones. They were simply walking along the sidewalk, licking scoops of chocolate ice cream, and suddenly, there it was, displayed in a window.
Emma wasn’t even sure it was meant to be a wedding dress, but it didn’t really matter. It was a cream colored, empire-wasted, sleeveless dress with one tier on the bottom of the long skirt. The fabric had a delicate floral pattern in light gold that shimmered when Emma moved. The top was a halter, which flattered Emma’s fuller bust due to her pregnancy. The empire waist also masked her growing baby bump and provided plenty of room in case she gained more in the next few weeks. When she tried it on, Ingrid started to cry.
An employee stopped to admire Emma. “We just got that in yesterday,” she told her. “A woman told us it was her mother’s prom dress in 1976.”
Emma’s mouth fell open as she locked eyes with Ingrid. Her foster mother pressed her hands to her mouth and let out a happy squeak.
“It’s fate, Emma,” she told her, and the two embraced.
They left the store with the dress lovingly wrapped in its original box, having paid a whopping thirty-five dollars and seventy-five cents.
Every single item on Ingrid’s list was checked off with simple solutions by the bride and groom:
Killian’s tux? Well, if Emma was wearing a 70s prom dress from a thrift shop, Killian would find a thrift store suit, too.
The food? A potluck lunch would do just fine.
The cake? The ones at the grocery store would do. As George Banks said in Father of the Bride, a cake is just flour, eggs, and sugar, right? Or something.
The only thing Killian was concerned about was a place to live. Sure, he knew his brother and Ingrid would never kick them out, and there was at least a modicum of privacy in his attic suite. Still, it would be a little awkward, for one. More than that, however, was Killian’s pride. If he was really providing for Emma and the baby, he should be able to put a roof over their heads.
His pride wouldn’t even allow him to go to his own brother with his concerns. Yet, Liam somehow knew anyway. Which was why he greeted Killian at the door one evening, a week and a half before the wedding, with a huge grin on his face and a slip of paper in his hand with an address on it.
After hearing what Liam had to say, Killian raced eagerly up the stairs to Emma’s room with the good news. He came to a sudden stop in Emma’s open doorway, the smile falling from his face. She was sitting atop her bed, hugging a pillow, hastily wiping tears from her cheeks. Her mother’s journal rested atop the quilt beside her.
“Hey,” Killian said softly as he entered the room, “what’s wrong?”
Emma slid over to make space for him on the bed, still trying to wipe the traces of tears from her cheeks. Killian picked up her mother’s journal as he made himself comfortable against the throw pillows along the headboard. Emma lifted his arm, put it around her shoulders, and tucked herself against him.
“Is it the curse?”
She shook her head. “It’s my mom,” she told him softly.
He waited, rubbing her arm gently, and pressing his lips to the top of her head. Emma let out a shaky sigh before continuing.
“I wish I knew where she was. I’m getting married, and she doesn’t even know.”
Killian nodded but said nothing. Emma lifted her head just enough to look up at him.
“Is it crazy that I wish she could be there?”
“Of course not. She’s your mother.”
“My insane, homeless, unpredictable mother who threw glass bottles at my head.”
Killian chuckled lightly. “True,” he tapped the green, cloth-covered notebook resting on the bedspread, “but I think reading her journal has given you a glimpse of the woman she was before. I think it’s made you realize, maybe for the first time, what you’ve lost.”
“That makes sense. I think I’m also worried that we haven’t heard from her in so long.”
Killian didn’t know what to say to ease her worries, so he cupped her face in his hand, tipped her chin up, and covered her lips with his. The kiss started gentle, intended simply to comfort, but then she responded so fervently and eagerly, that he lost himself. He shifted so she was beneath him, which caused a mewling sound to pass her lips that drove him wild. Emma slid her hand beneath his t-shirt, sending shivers up his spine as her fingers caressed his lower back. His hand grasped her waist, and his thumb slipped beneath the hem of her shirt. At the simple contact, Emma arched into him, and he began to trail kisses along her jawline. With one hand still on his back, her other hand threaded through his hair. She gasped when his lips trailed to the sensitive skin behind her ear, and something about the sound snapped him out of his haze of desire.
Killian pulled away abruptly and sat up, putting some distance between them. Emma still lay there on the bed, her face flushed, her hair splayed out on the pillows beneath her, a look of confusion marring her brow.
“I’m sorry, Emma,” he said thickly, fixing his own mussed hair with shaking hands.
“What for?” Emma asked indignantly, sitting up beside him. “We’re engaged.”
He turned to her and took her face gently in both hands. “I know. I love you, Emma, and I plan to cherish you. You deserve that. After everything you’ve been through, I’m not going to take you like this, hurried and frantic, thinking in the back of our minds that someone could interrupt us at any moment.”
Emma glanced sheepishly at the still open door and giggled. “Then close the door next time.”
He laughed with her and pulled her to him, holding her gently. He ran his fingers through her slightly tangled hair.
“I want to make love to you. Slowly. Thoroughly.”
Emma shivered in his arms. “Are you trying to torture me on purpose?”
He laughed again. “I feel a bit tortured, myself, truth be told. But we only have a week and a half. Then we’ll have the time and the privacy we deserve.”
“Time maybe. But privacy?”
Killian pulled the forgotten slip of paper from his pocket. “Yes, privacy.”
Emma snatched it from his hand, looking at it curiously as she settled in the middle of the bed with her legs crossed. “An address?”
“Our address,” he told her, grinning broadly.
“For real?” Emma’s eyes widened.
“For real.”
Emma squealed and threw her arms around his neck. He laughed as she peppered kisses all over his face.
“How?” she finally asked.
“There’s a professor of archaeology taking a sabbatical to do a dig in Greece. He told Liam he was looking for someone to take care of his house while he’s gone. So it’s ours. For free.”
“For free?”
Killian shrugged. “Well, there are also some maintenance things on the house I’m agreeing to do for him free of charge, but basically.”
Emma gazed in shock and happiness at the paper in her hands. “It’s too good to be true.”
“It’s fate.”
Emma’s eyes shone with happy tears as she looked back up at him. “It really is.”
Killian was ready to throw caution to the wind and press Emma back down into the pillows when Ingrid appeared in the doorway. He was worried what she would say, seeing him on Emma’s bed, but Ingrid seemed too ecstatic to notice.
“We’ve found her!” she told them.
“Who?” Emma asked.
“Your mom!”
#cs ff#captain swan fic#captain swan ff#captain swan fanfic#captain swan fanfiction#cs au#cs impossible au#lieutenant duckling#modern fantasy#angst#cs angsty august#impossible au
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the waiting re: confirmation that I’ve been hired is actually making me insane good god I need to Know
#the thing is. I’m not sure if they implied I was definitely being hired at the end of that interview#or if they were still considering whether or not they need/want me#because it Felt like they were just sorting out where to put me and now this waiting is less about whether or not I’m hired and more#sorting out shifts and positions and whatnot.#I can’t tell if I missed a social cue here or something but they didn’t make me a direct offer so I’m assuming i didn’t and this was just#a really weirdly blurry area#I keep telling myself that it’d be weird to me if they didn’t hire me considering she said they needed to fill 5 host spots and that’s part#of why she was suggesting that position for me#like they clearly need the employment and I’m inevitably not the Worst Option (at least I don’t think I’m a bad enough option to where theyd#reject me even when they’re understaffed#and also it feels weird that she’d explain exactly how choosing weekly shifts works and the cafeteria and lockers and parking and etc#if it wasn’t pretty solid that I was being hired#but I’m still on the fence because. well my ridiculously high rate of failure for one but also some other stuff she said like ‘we still have#a few more candidates to talk to and then we’ll get back to you’ or something like that#which again I’m like?? maybe that was more in reference to like? telling me WHERE they want to employ me? like as a host upstairs or#downstairs or the slim chance id get a busser/runner position. but I don’t fucking know man#like I asked ‘how will I know which positions are available to me’ or something like that (can’t remember my exact words) and that’s when#she told me they’d be sorting things out and would be in touch to follow up or something like that#so like. is it safe to assume I have A Job and it’s just unclear right now exactly Which One???#gahhhdgasggahhhghh this is really driving me insane dude I know this is all super trivial to think about right now cause it hopefully will#be cleared up sooner than later but. I can’t stop thinking about it and it’s making it hard to focus on anything#kibumblabs
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I hate the stretch lines in the front of Curly's uniform because that means the devs rushed to make a model in like a month or so and thought "They gotta at least know he has huge knockers, gotta know he's got back pain." Cause like what is the thematic importance of his tits having overhang?
What responsibility is that representing? Breast reduction? It shows an inherent greed in his character due to the excess and heshouldletmeholdone and that he clearly is blinded cause if he tries to look down his damn ladder all he's seeing is his own cleavage.
#this is my curly slander post ig#disclaimer i need you to understand i see all fictional men i like as like butches Curly is no exception#but like they didnt need to add that many polygons to his chest like its unnessary and honestly a little mean he already has so many things#to handle and you expect him to hold those boys up like that just aint right this is like something so stupid but i know you can tell im#having strong feelings about it cause like what was the point why did they survive the fucking crash it has to be a injoke at this point#with the devs it shouldnt make me this mad im turning into a misandrist but only towards large chested men#mouthwashing#curly mouthwashing#shitpost#suggestive#ig because this is just about his chest but like also they made him objectively pretty for no reason like yeah like ideal man and work ig#but they went over the extra mile like i have a right to be mad they did that much for a model we see canonically for like two seconds its#crazy actually how little we see of curly pre crash because we also lose his physical movements to help characterize him the way we see#body language with the other characters and how it gives way to their struggles and personalities and sentiments in certain moments#like all he does and how he emotes is stifled by the fact we always play as him until the last moments where he takes over to try and save#the ship and crew and even right before that the scene is so wrought with tension we cant tell what that look he gave Jimmy meant due to#the limitations of the models and how stiff Curly is like was it fear acceptance denial we dont know enought about how he acts himself#to tell and then everything else is charaterized by what Jimmy had done to where we dont really just get to see Curly as himself like Anya#and Swansea and Daisuke we have no idea how theyd act in a regular moment outside of a few glimpses and even then it is them doing#their jobs like grrrr we hate an unreliable narrator but also its the fact jimmy clearly does not interact with them or try to outside of#his position as copilot and then captain harkening back to the entire capitlist view of utility and how he views all of them as useless eve#Curly which fandom tangent the fandom also tends to do to Curly as they base every trait on what they think he failed to do as Captain#between Jimmy and Anya when the QnAs kinda make him out to be a rather open and willing person but still someone who isnt like a push over#just thinking of QnA three where it mentions hes very open to trying new things and you need to be an open minded person to open urself up#to failure like that and ig this is just the weird view that Curly needs to learn that or that theres redemption he needs personality wise#verses healing and learning from trauma like idk its the idea that people assume he did abosultely nothing when the games points out direct#and throught parallels he was taking actions its just wasnt enough and an over focus on absolute inaction vs ineffective methods used to#tackle the issues and themes the game grapples with plus wanting someone to take the blame and have to make it up to Anya even tho#i think it would mean nothing from Curly because she saw his efforts and would be disappointed it wasnt enough but the idea she would#disregard the attempts or not acknoweldge Jimmy as the epicenter compared ot Curly is weird and too focused on someone
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"As for the government of the kingdom, [Edward V] had complete confidence in the peers of realm and the queen."
"According to the Crowland continuator, [Elizabeth Woodville] seems to have taken the king's place in listening to his council immediately after Edward IV's death. It does appear that she expected to have some role in her son's kingship, and the Crowland continuator’s report of the letters sent to her by [Richard of Gloucester] indicates that she had good reason to expect to be able to work with him and the other councillors: 'the duke of Gloucester wrote the most pleasant letters to console the queen; he promised to come and offer submission, fealty and all that was due from him to his lord and king, Edward V, the first-born son of his brother the dead king and the queen'."
"[However], in what was Gloucester's first coup, Edward V was separated from his household and Woodville advisors. When the young king questioned the move, Buckingham was reported to have told the boy 'It is not in the business of women but men to govern kingdoms'. The blunt remark referred to the authority of Elizabeth Woodville as queen and the power she must have anticipated within the new political climate left by Edward IV's sudden death [...] While the veracity of this scene is questionable*, the words attributed to the duke no doubt seemed plausible to Dominic Mancini who believed they exemplified the popular sentiment held by men [...]."
-Dominic Mancini, The Usurpation of Richard the Third / J.L. Laynesmith, The Last Medieval Queens: English Queenship 1445-1503 / Alexander R. Brondarbit, Power Brokers and the Yorkist State, 1461-1485
*One of Mancini's key sources seems to have been Edward V's own doctor, John Argentine, who attended to him in the Tower. It's very likely that he was the one who recounted this scene to Mancini, which suggests that it should probably be considered more credible than not.
#historicwomendaily#elizabeth woodville#wars of the roses#15th century#english history#my post#Croyland wrote that 'The counsellors of the king - now deceased - were present with the queen' so yes#He clearly seemed to view Elizabeth as taking on Edward's role after his death#Which is striking since her son - the new King - hadn't even arrived in London yet let alone be crowned#It's also interesting that Richard wrote letters to *her* rather than the rest of the council and that she was the final deciding authority#when it came to her son (she was the one who wrote to him for his military escort) - it's a clear indication of who was seen as important#This is also reflected in 16th century chronicles like the claim that the Archbishop of York gave Elizabeth the Great Seal#We don't know if this is true - the Archbishop was definitely opposed to Richard but More may have embellished or invented the story#But either way it reflects the perception that Elizabeth would have a major role in the realm's governance during her son's minority#Which makes sense as Edward V would have been used to his mother governing for him as part of his council his whole life#It's also interesting to compare the impression we get of Elizabeth's role with that of former kings' mothers in late medieval England#Because that can help us understand her activities (and perception of them) within proper context rather than purely in isolation#From what I understand kings' mothers could be very influential (eg: Joan of Kent) but were almost never visibly/directly associated#with the governance of the realm. It's striking that the most extreme and arguably the only exception - Isabella of France - assumed#her unofficial regent-like role only after literally deposing the former King aka her husband in the most atypical situation imaginable#So it's striking that Elizabeth *was* visibly and directly associated with it despite her situation being entirely standard; despite the#lack of precedents; and despite the physical absence of her son. Especially since she was effectively the king's mother for only 20 days#I do think it's possible to argue that it says something about her power as queen#(Edward *did* give her unusual positions of authority either way) and may also suggest a more direct personality on her part#It may also explain why historians were/are so readily prepared to believe that she wanted to 'usurp the sovereignty' to quote George Buck#Ofc this is my interpretation based on my (limited) knowledge - feel free to correct me
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actually what annoys me most actions-wise the whole series is that a mechanism by which villages self-govern clearly exists in lumatere but when beatriss buys fenton even though she only pays like 2/3rds the cost she still gets to be sole leader via what is from this point implied to be hereditary nobility. like it's not feudalism 1:1 lol they can leave but still. it is very hard for me to see it as a victory for anyone except beatriss
#altho nettice's villagers don't really seem to be in a position where they can leave. so maybe it's an individual discretion thing. which is#still nasty!!!! like obviously it's not modern day it's fantasy they're nobles blah blah blah whatever. if so then why the hell would you#suggest that self-governance is legal (if you have enough cash) then show me a major character becoming their landlord like she's a hero#just don't say they can buy the damn village themselves come onnnn man#sorry im still in a bad mood and i haven't been able to come up with anything coherent in a while
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...
#hey why can you forgive a male character's actions towards another male character for the purposes of shipping#but can't fathom doing the same for the same male character's actions towards a female character?#are same gender ships inherently less problematic to you?#i would say - at worst - that the actions are equally bad#and they were bad. this is fiction etc.#the actions towards the female character were one off. possibly to save face. she wasn't in physical danger. she is revealed to not feel#emotionally threatened by it#(this is different to a real life scenario where 1. we can't see that 2. there's a possibility for danger)#we also can't see if that pattern of behaviour could be continued#this is introduced as the first time it happens. it begins respectfully. and it doesn't happen again.#contrast this to the behaviour with the male character#this has been happening for years and is clearly a display of power. the male victim is consistently physically socially and emotionally#hurt and tormented#and he does not suggest forgiveness for him or any positive feelings about this#so. therefore. i would say the m/m one is more toxic than the m/f one#this isn't to say you're toxic if you ship the m/m one. no do what you want#my main issue with that one is the misogyny and mischaracterisation that sometimes appears#but like. why can you forgive the pattern and not the isolated incident#why does it feel somewhat connected to the b word?#idk. maybe it's not. maybe you're bi too. slay. but it feels weird to me.#yes i'm overreacting about petty fandom drama. and yet
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👙 ( For Pogue to see Jayn in lingerie~ @in--noctem )
She kept trying to quietly motivate herself to leave the bathroom.
Pogue had lit up when she'd modeled those lace panties during the lazy day they'd shared while on winter vacation with their coven. But what if he was actually just trying not to laugh? He'd tugged off her sweatshirt & they'd had some really good sex then (wall-shaking, Reid-shocking sex, apparently). At least, the sex was good for her...it wasn't like he hadn't had better with Kate, who probably looked good in everything she tried on...
Jayn told herself that she was being realistic. She wasn't thin. The straps of her bras gently indented her skin, & the garters she'd tried on had all squeezed her in a way that made her look uncomfortable, even if they didn't feel incredibly tight. She had left the lingerie store in tears, clutching the small bag with her two purchases as if someone were going to try & smack it out of her hands. But she'd still told Pogue about it (minus the teary part), because part of her wanted him to know. She wanted to be pretty--for him & for herself.
That's not what she saw in the mirror, though.
Her nails, which were freshly manicured from the afternoon before, nervously drummed on her bathroom counter. She kept her eyes on them, because when she'd finally finished doing her makeup after she got dressed, she'd freaked out. That was the price she paid for being fat & looking in the mirror.
She didn't understand why it was so hard. She didn't find every girl to be attractive, but they all seemed to be more attractive than she was. Blonde, brunette, redhead, plus-size, toned, pale, tanned, dark-skinned--women of all kinds were beautiful to her. & yet it was always a miracle when Jayn saw her reflection & wasn't disgusted. Sometimes she did her hair by using her shadow to check for stray locks, just so she didn't have to do the alternative. No one knew that.
"Jay? I'm comin' in--"
"No-!" But Pogue had had enough. According to her phone, he'd been waiting for her to come out for almost 10 minutes. No wonder his patience was wearing thin.
He opened the door, ready to model for Abercrombie & Fitch as always with his perfectly tousled hair, soft hazel eyes, & (shirtless) toned body. Jayn was never jealous of him. She just wondered if she deserved him.
His lips parted just as his eyes widened. He hadn't looked that surprised when she'd revealed the designer panties hidden under those thick yoga pants.
"H-how...how bad is it?" Jayn managed, eyes big & glassy like an innocent baby cow's. She didn't know what she'd do if he laughed at her. In her dreams, her reaction depended on what he said, not what he did.
"Baby...babygirl, c'mere." He stepped into her space, gently moving her so she was facing him. His hands rested on her hips, as usual. He might've smiled, if she didn't look so pathetic. "Don't cry. Hey..." A hot stray tear ran down her cheek, cruelly wetting her lined eyelids. She'd even put on some eyeshadow, which she'd never done before. "I know you were scared. I won't say you shouldn't be, I don't know how you feel really...but I know you did this for me." Good try, he's saying. "I think you look so sexy--why don't you?"
"Huh?" She swallowed a sob & he laughed gently, trying to wipe her eyes. "Nooo--'dab, don't wipe', it'll get smudged--"
"It must be really fuckin' hard, being a girl. Assholes hitting on you, periods...Jaynie, you're always saying how hot I am. But I don't always feel like that."
"Really? Wh-why?" He sighed, looking away for a second.
"I...I can't--it's a long story. I just need you to understand that you're not--nothing's wrong with you just because you aren't confident all the time. You also aren't ugly, you're gorgeous, an' I wouldn't tell you if I didn't think so. Do I lie to you?"
"...no."
"Good. Now, let's see what we've got here!" Pogue took her hands & stepped back, admiring every inch of his girlfriend. She'd put random curls in her hair, then combed it out into a cheap version of beach waves. Her dark eyes were lined & shadowed, & she wore subtle lipstick. The lingerie she wore was a pink, v-neck satin slip that ended just past her butt & had black lace on the tiny side slit, plus the neckline. "Goddamn...we're gonna 'test the structural integrity' of this, aren't we?" he asked, shit-eating grin on his face. The phrase came from some night when he was rambling about cars, only for her to cut him off with a kiss & drag him on top of her for being so cute.
"Yeah! I guess we are," Jayn replied. It was always hard to keep from smiling when he already was. He took her hand & led her into her bedroom, where he'd taken the liberty of folding her quilt back & getting some condoms ready. Within a minute, the two of them were on the mattress, groaning, kissing & pawing at each other.
"Love you, mmh~"
"Hm, of course--oh, f-fuck, Pogue--"
"My sexy girlfriend, look at you, so damn pretty, mmm..." He'd stripped, put on a condom & was pushing the fabric of her slip up to her waist when--
"Pogue, wait, there's--"
"Oh, damn. Jay..." She hadn't told him that, aside from the slip, she was wearing a matching set of black lace: a fairly simple bra without underwire & surprisingly comfy crotchless panties. He stared at her neatly trimmed, very wet cunt, which was so nicely framed for him. She gulped, noticing the hungry look in his eyes & spread her legs some more, trying to be helpful. Without warning, Pogue Fucking Parry lunged, licking her from bottom to top like he was starving.
"Ah-! Nnnhahahnnmhnh--" He was taking "eating her out" to a whole other level & she returned the favor once she could see straight. I guess I don't look too bad after all.
#I feel like Jayn randomly suggests calling their friend group “the Ipswich Coven” & she's so excited it kinda catches on after that#& yes I know we haven't RP'd the winter trip which is why I chose to write a random event AFTER that (I don't wanna skip it entirely!! ;-;)#Pogue wouldn't let me lol#jkw: thread#in--noctem#thanks for the ask!#ugh I had to wait for a day when I wasn't hyperfocused on my private worldbuilding or feeling down...so yeah here it is!#body positivity#pogue fucking parry#emphasis on the fucking
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are you normal or did you note down the puns in the act 1 event quest to compare between localizations
#so the thing is i heard there would be puns so i switched my text language to spanish again#and i caught 3 of them#the first is the va-iew-vyastra one#that one was pretty much the same in spa it was 'vayumatra' so i think it was just the 'matra' pun#the second in en was apparently 'ground nuts'#i find the spa one more related to the context of a.lbedo's suggestion to test out m.ondstadt native flora afterwards#it's 'valbayas' instead and he said it's bc 'vayas al suelo' tal vez despues de comer demasiado#i will admit that one coaxed an actual laugh out of me#valberry in spa text is valbaya -> baya means berry#but the pun is bc vaya and baya are pronounced almost the same way#the 'b' in baya in this case is an approximate of /b/ bc it appears in intervocalic position#and orthographic 'v' is pronounced as /b/ after a significant pause#idr if he was speaking quickly at this time but yeah#and 'vayas' is the 2nd person singular subjunctive form of 'ir' meaning 'to go'#so the gloss would probably be 'you fell to the ground'#bc she ate too many valberries#the third in en was 'c.ollei lily/flower'#in spa they did a diff pun and he said 'coleigas' como las colegas de c.ollei#it's a cognate so 'colleague' and 'c.ollei'#love these little changes in the localizations it makes me pay more attention to differences#i also mainly use cn voiceover. sometimes i switch to en for certain characters#i left the vo the same and boy was that a test of listening comprehension#unfortunately i'm not as proficient there so i could only pick out certain words and phrases#which was still fun ngl! i really took my time with this quest#i played it late in the day too so that's why this is late-ish#oh right and i was spiraling in the abyss earlier which put me in The worst mood but hey 36 stars we take those#if you read this essay. why. but yw that was your localization infodump for the day#unfortunately i cannot ramble about this anywhere so to the blog it goes#note#genshinposting
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you apply for several jobs on seek (my preferred job site), indeed or jora. a couple get back to you and say "please do our preemptive psych (aptitude) tests/chat bot/fun games assessment/s with an online video interview (within the next 48hrs).... so that we can assess your viability for this role."
you do the bs chatbot/psych test/automated video interview etc etc. some of these give you an instant response after doing them, which you kinda like.... but also really absolutely hate. every test result you get back basically tells you that you're a walking contradiction: you LOVE to dominate conversations, which means your co-workers are somehow terrified of you. so please learn to PIPE FUCK DOWN, LISTEN AND TAKE IN OTHER PEOPLE'S THOUGHTS/FEEDBACK etc (which you do anyway). however, you are also EXTREMELY SHY and goal-oriented.... which means your productivity is moderately ok, but doing just a bit more will make you a go-getter.... but uh. have we told you that your coworkers and clients will NEVER get to know you deeply?? so, learn to speak up and make friends in the workplace and also have good client relationships 😊!
wait! wait! we're not done tearing you limb from limb yet!!! have you considered that your productivity is actually awful because you're so easily distracted and don't like routine??? have you considered that this lack of attention can ruin your KPI achievement targets.... and single-handedly utterly destroy the performance efforts of the ENTIRE team and company???? we suggest focusing on streamlining your workflow and productivity habits.... and totally NEVER getting distracted EVER, so YOU make US money and not the other way round 😤😡. also, maybe apply for something that involves a whole load of rules and stable methods (bc we conversely think you're also a very stable and consistent person emotionally), not an ever changing admin position!!! (BTW: we'll never tell you that these "rule loving" jobs include anywhere between $10,000 of study (at the very least for tafe) to $30,000+ for a degree (at the most) or SEVERAL years of work experience.... which you very obviously don't have for even a junior position, let alone a middle management or senior position).
hey, we're nearly done! we swear 😰! don't leave yet... if you're still breathing that is 😅😂!!! isn't this so much fun 🙃?!! congrats on being able to analyse the complex relationships in teamwork environments... if only you could collaborate- which you do well, actually, because you're super laid-back (everyone wants someone like you on their team 💞..... just not us though lol 😋) - and LEAD, maybe???? but also DON'T be a leader, and try to really achieve "above and beyond" (despite what we said in the job description).... because we don't want you thinking that you're actually able to do anything of meaning to you... and that you can really achieve your said big goals, with us in tow 🙃. finally, NEVER be laid-back in the work environment. we construe this as being lackadaisical (which is a BIG, intelligent word for L A Z Y, if you didn't already know that 🤓! also.... are you a young millennial or gen z??? hehehe! we've got you all figured out 😎) which means you'll NEVER do YOUR work to OUR fake desired standard/s anyway 🙃.
PHEW! that was a lot! thanks! have a wonderful day. now GO FUCK YOURSELF 😊' [one more teenie tiny thing: please give us feedback on this reading! how did we do??? 😊]
you then read these bullshit results to a family member. they are HORRIFIED at the utter lack of respect, transparency, care, trust, integrity and human interaction in the hiring processes of the modern job market, mostly for the office admin and retail jobs that you've been applying for. when ironically, all of those attributes you just listed above (and sometimes more) are the so-called values/mission/goals of EVERY firm/business etc that you've applied for.
the downright rudeness and callousness of being absolutely torn to shreds by a shitty little bot; for a big retail chain's christmas casual position, that they use to save time to cut in-person interview times.... all to be told that that's why you'll never be a check-out chick for 3 months over christmas.... is fucking awful and deflating. (although, not that it matters. you didn't really want it anyway. you tell yourself). being told that you won't/can't sit on a computer and phone, using word, excel and the business's CRM all day.... doing admin for what feels the 10 billionth fuckin local office or government dept/council job, or other fucking small local places that you've applied for.... all bc "you have big dreams" or "you love to talk. but not at your job" or whatever other condescending, demotivating and backhanded bullshit that they've said in these test results... is humiliating, depressing and undermining as all fuck.
all bc you selected the wrong answers in a "fun mini-game" about how to reply to work colleagues in the company chat program, whatever that may be. or all the other shitty psych/aptitude test mini games that i played for big firms for uni grad programs back in uni in 2017. or, you've selected the wrong answers in a more ~traditional~ psych/aptitude test for a local educational institution like a uni or a technical/trade college.
it makes you question what the actual goddamned fuck the HR people actually want. what the actual fuck the bot is trained to snuff out and highlight and gush all over in someone's resume, interview and test answers, like a big corporate cum stain. are they really as "fair", "consistent" and "equitable" or whatever the fuck else benevolent words companies use to describe them??? are they ethical??? am i going insane??? would it be healthier for me just to jump off a cliff into the ocean filled with blood hungry cartoon sharks circling below??? would it be better to [enter, pursued by a bear] when i FINALLY get another interview.... if i EVER get another one; just to serve justice???? if it's a dog eat dog world, why don't i just become a golden retriever that just wants to eat treats and make dog and human friends on the daily??? if the world has gone to the dogs or the bears or sharks; wouldn't it just be fucking nice to bring one along with you, to make a point????
it's utter shit out here, lads [gender neutral]. we're all fucking tired and dead inside. it's why "no one wants to work anymore", as the piss-baby weak employers LOVE to bitch and moan. but: why work when you're disrespected from the fucking outset??? why work when you realise that you'll NEVER have the upper hand in any-fucking-thing??? why work when you're ignored constantly or even ghosted by employers??? the questions go on and on and on. "stop being deafeatist!" or whatever other word/phrase i can hear the "no one wants to work anymore!"crowd shout. no. im tired. we're tired. we're motherfucking done.
You apply for 20 jobs on Indeed. The silence is deafening.
You apply for 20 jobs on Indeed. Half of them require you to create an account on the company website. You leave a trail of ghost accounts that will be used once and never again. You never receive a response.
You apply for 20 jobs on Indeed. One employer offers an interview, but it's so rare for you to receive any response that you forget to check the website and you miss the time.
You apply for 20 jobs on Indeed. One employer offers an interview, but you don't know the magic words that signal to the esoteric mind of an interviewer that you're fit for the job.
You apply for 20 jobs on Indeed. One employer e-mails you saying that 'unfortunately, you do not have the qualifications we are looking for'. You check the job again and see you applied to be a menial labourer.
You apply for 20 jobs on Indeed. Half of them require a car. No one stops to ask how you're supposed to afford one with no job.
You apply for 20 jobs on Indeed. One employer offers a job. The commute makes you want to die in your sleep.
You call the HR manager for the workplace in hopes of arranging an interview more directly. They don't even have an answering machine.
Employers complain that no one wants to work anymore.
#ilona's jobhunting thoughts and woes#ilona's work dilemmas#ilona's work thoughts#i fucking hate indeed and jora#they ALWAYS list jobs WAY beyond a job ad's closing date#fuck off with your 30+ days up to like literally 6 month old job openings indeed and jora#why the FUCK are they still up????#and this is why i'll always be fucking angry as fuck that my old boss REFUSED to give me a good reference call back in july#she just couldnt keep her mouth shut and be happy that i'd been given a full position upgrade from admin trainee to admin officer#all bc i didnt S P E C I F I C A L L Y listen to her and her job suggestion (support worker)#so you must dump out her application and tell her to apply for that instead :) why WONT SHE LISTEN TO ME???!!!! im perfect#and i KNOW whats BEST FOR HER AND SHE DOESNT BC SHE'S STUPID AND SELFISH AND DOESNT WANNA GIVE BACK TO THE COMMUNITY...#OR CARE ABOUT THE SHORTAGE OF WORKERS IN OUR FIELD#like yeah this is why social/community services has a high burnout/turnover rate and every other guilt trippy thing they told me there#bc bosses are so fucking controlling and bitchy (and apparently blameless) that it's not worth ever dealing with again (and so are clients)#*some clients not all#if she'd kept her mouth shut i would've been happy in that job for a while before changing again tbh.#and not stuck in the hellscape that is job hunting and now centrelink (aussie social services) jobseeker payment purgatory#(even though i shouldve applied for it MUCH earlier than august 31 lmao)#ANYWAY.#ilona makes a diabtribe/story/speech on a big post#ilona adds to a big post#shut up ilona
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#i’m really sad rn because I feel like my relationship with my mom is ruined#she’s upset that I don’t want to go over to her house in the morning for christmas while shes still testing positive for covid#my sister and I suggested we postpone celebrating for a few days and she got upset#saying it felt like she was being rescheduled like a doctors appointment#and then she basically told me my fears for covid were silly and that my anxiety was ruining my life#mind you my father died two years ago from covid#so its a sensitive topic for me#and then she told me that i have no empathy for why spending christmas with my sister and i is important to her#i kept trying to offer solutions so we could still do stuff together and she just didnt want to even consider it#like we always take photos on the beach Christmas eve and she had discussed with my sister that we just stand far away on the beach for the#but then yesterday she went with her boyfriend didnt say anything and posted it on facebook#i asked her why she didnt invite us and she said ‘i didnt think it was important’#and i asked if she wanted to go today to get them and she said she wasnt in a very christmas mood this year#and then today we were trying to offer going in the morning to see her and sit outside for a little while masked up#so we could at least see her on xmas bc her whole thing is that she was upset she would be alone on Christmas#and she basically said she didnt want us to come over and that its pointless#and she was like ‘thank GOD i have bf to go see otherwise i’d be completely alone’#and she keeps saying like ‘we’ll just axe christmas this year just dont worry about it you girls do your thing’#when we have been trying to say we can still do everything we normally do for xmas just on a different day#and she doesnt want to bc ‘its not christmas’#and she told my sister and i to come by whenever to pick up our gifts#and like i tried i tried to make the best of a shitty situation#theres no need for the entire holiday to be ignored just bc we can’t celebrate on a specific daye#were not a religious family but my moms torn up about having to see other people with their families while shes home alone#and i made a comment about when she got sick she decided she was going to be miserable and refuses to even consider any sort of compromise#and she was like ‘WOW that was rude. i cant believe you said something that rude to me’#i apologized but tbh i dont think i was rude. i was harsh/blunt but I was just calling it like i saw it#i hate it when people say that but i dont know how else to phrase it#but yeah then she was like ‘ive cried enough over this and every time i think i’m okay you rub salt in the wound’#when i was just asking if we could do stuff later
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The Guilty Plea
SIMON 'GHOST' RILEY x FEM!READER TASK FORCE 141 x FEM!READER
Traitors Among Us (Part 1) and Innocents Among You (Part 2)
Verdict Due (Part 4) Clear Skies (Part 5)
Summary: As you're discharged from the infirmary, under watchful eye, you head to Laswell to talk on the rest of your now ruined military career. Of course, you're forced to confront your team as it happens, the last people on earth you'd like to see.
If you liked this would you Buy me a Coffee?
---
Running your fingers along the raised, pink scar across you cheek, the feeling of it...it really looked terrible. A part of you thought it would disappear, hoped it would, but it didn't. It just became severely more noticeable. Looking at this, you knew you'd always have to think of it. You'd sport this reminder for the rest of your life.
Looking away from it, you find your own tired eyes in the mirror, you haven't been sleeping well. Or at all. You can't remember the last time you got 4 hours, let alone 8. Dark circles still surrounded them but at least the bruising and the swelling had gone down.
You couldn't recognize yourself. Not really.
This woman looked so exhausted, so frail and so goddamn angry. It was accurate, it was how you felt. All of it. So, you supposed that the mirror's reflection was the truth, this was you indeed.
"If you need another day or two, no one will ask questions."
You glance over towards your psychologist, your fucking therapist, a nice little 'gift' sent over by the bureau to check in on your mental state after your ordeal. Glaring at him through the reflection of your mirror, he sighs, putting down his pen that slaps against his notepad, "I can't help you if you don't talk to me."
"I'm going to Laswell." Ignoring his statement, you speak. "I'm ready. I'll pack up. Get back to base. Vera had me discharged from the infirmary. I can start ov--"
"Vera?"
"My nurse. You met her," you continued, annoyance spiking at the interruption. Your wrist brace squeaking quietly under the pressure of your fist tightening beneath the table.
"Right..."
"Do you listen to a word I say outside of...my 'trauma'?" You wonder, bluntly.
Your psychologist blinks, surprised, before clearing his throat, appalled. "If you feel I can be more attentive to your state of well-being throughout our process, than by all means--"
"Oh, so 'no'?" you lean back into your seat, a strained laugh leaving you. His lips press together and you continue before he can find the words. "Because whenever I mention leaving this fucking team, you either adjust our schedule for another two weeks or suggest hypnotic therapy, as if I need anyone else digging around to fuck up my mental state."
"I never meant to imply--"
"Oh, you implied it," you interrupted, gritting your teeth. "I know what I want. And I want off Task Force 141."
He taps at the leather of his notebook. "Scars heal, just remember that, Ms. (L/n). The reminders of your experience shouldn't have to haunt you."
"It's not the scars, I've had my share way before this," you admitted, rising to your feet. You exhale deeply that tells to the effort of it, the steel gear hinges along your leg braces shift with your change of position. Still getting use to them. "It's the person."
"Has she changed, you think?" the psychologist begins to write, getting somewhere.
"She doesn't exist anymore."
Finally, placing the mirror down and onto the side table, you pushed off of the table, rolling your IV pole along with you. Passing the chair your psychologist sits on, he closes his notebook with a frustrated huff, looking over his shoulder. "Session over for you already, Ms. (L/n)?" he sighs. "We've still got the hour."
"I'm done," you take the knob in your hand. Turning.
In more ways than one.
"You understand that, informing your captain on your leave is required of you. Have you spoken to any of them, in the last few weeks?" he spoke up, quickly. "I'm sure giving them a space to open up, share from their view--"
"Why should I care--"
"--will give you better understanding, better clarity of the situation they were in--
Appalled. "What the fuck?" Jamming the door closed with a loud, shuttering thud, you whip around. "IT'S NOT ABOUT THEM!" you could just rip your hair out. "Who--who says that to someone?!"
Your psychologist sits there, eyes wide in confusion. "What--"
"Christ, can you hear me? Can you--can you see me? I've got metal plates in my spine, braces holding my knees in place and nerve damage that'll never heal! Who gives a fuck about them!" your skin feels red hot, your face twisted in rage. "I gave my life! My life to this! And then I'm tortured, I'm threatened, drugged and beaten by my own team, my f--my family for eight fucking years..."
You continue with a heavy chest. "And I'm supposed to invite them for dinner to talk and listen them bitch and moan about why they thought it was necessary to beat me to death for two weeks?! Fuck you!" you spat. "I don't owe them anything!"
"That's not what I was trying to say, Ms. (L/N). I apologize, I overstepped. Come sit down--"
"Of course you meant it," you interrupted, mock humor. "Don't be a pussy, own up to it. Revel in your truth. Be tter yet--" you snatch a journal from the cabinet. Tossing it his way. "Make a note of it."
Turning the knob, you leave the room with a slam of the metal door.
---
You were officially famous. On the base, you were now a legend.
A story that would be mentioned and told at lunch for months. Probably years.
First, you were a rat. Next, you were innocent. This was the most gossip any of those in service had ever seen in their years of service.
An interesting reminder to those in service that you weren't safe off duty either.
You learned a few days ago that there was an update put into the interrogational unit, something about how to properly go about dissecting evidence and being on the lookout for enemy spies in the militia.
You guessed you had been told about it in an effort to be appeased by the thought that the head of control paid attention to anything beyond their own noses for once. But, you had little to no faith in a system that's nearly killed you on and off the field by now, so it didn't matter.
You doubted the new rules would be followed though, there was a plethora of things they'd done to you in that cell that were both illegal and unsanctioned. Most of all, that were expected towards an enemy, a prisoner of war at best, and not a fellow marine.
You arrive at the housing quarters, swiping your key card, pulling the handle and entering the wing. Immediately, you're greeted by a dozen eyes, conversations stopping short and clothes ruffling to silence, suddenly whispers fill the space and eyes turn away.
"Oh, god, it's her..." says one man in the far corner.
"Shut the fuck up, man!" came a harsh whisper back.
"I didn't know it was that bad..."
All those eyes on you, makes you pause in your step, looking around at all of your fellow soldiers, the men and women you've served with for years. Many you recognized, ate with, fought beside that turned their backs to you now. Out of respect? Out of distaste, morale, nerves, pity, it all didn't matter. It all felt the same.
The wheels attached to your IV pole suddenly sounded much too loud on the polished flooring, as you walked down the hall as fast as you were able to.
Breathing out deeply, you get to an elevator, pushing on the button, once, twice, three times, just open goddamn it.
With a ding, the metal doors open, and suddenly you're aware that people could be in the elevator, they could be in this elevator, he could be in this elevator. Your eyes flicker down to the floor, your grip on the pole of your iv tightens, your shoulders stiffen, waiting for a blow that will never come.
You stand there as the doors open up, the small space empty, the metal walls reflect only her and a streak of lighting from the ceiling.
Looking up slowly, finally taking a breath, before sliding the iv up and onto the elevator, following it as you press your floor number along the way.
The ride up is fast, a little rumble as it stops, and then the doors open. Faster than you were prepared for.
Peeking out down the hallway, luckily no one to bump into, which you were thankful for. But, it didn't make this hall any less haunting. You'd been cornered in this same hall, you could recall being hauled out of the room after the solid handle of a knife hits your temple.
You don't go down fast enough, whipping around as you stumble to take the wrist of your attacker, mostly for balance, it's Price. In shock, you're unprepared as Johnny's arm encircle your neck, locking you into position as you both stumble backwards onto the floor. He blocks your airways, hushing you harshly as you struggle, feet kicking out and your vision blurring as your team surrounds you. Your family.
That was quite the headache to wakeup with afterwards.
You hadn't quite remembered until now. Being back served as a hell of a kickstart to your memory.
Just a few more reasons to get the fuck off of 141.
Getting off the elevators, the metal doors sliding closed behind you, you make your way down the hall. The polished flooring creates a subtle squeak through the wheels of your iv pole, your hand absently running over the fading stitches along your side.
Passing the shadows of your tortured memory, the doorway of the office was closed, locked.
You pass Kyle's room.
Johnny's.
Finally, you rush up to the next room on the left, grabbing the handle, before beginning to twist, but then you're yanking your hand back as if the metal had burned you. Your back ramming into the back wall, catching yourself, this wasn't your room.
It was Simon's.
You'd spent hours, days, in that room. More than your own.
Why wouldn't you? You were about to get married to the man. You had more in this room than you had in yours.
Sharp breaths leave you, shivering in your effort to keep yourself together, your head goes back into the wall, swallowing down the ache in your chest.
You wait, muscles tensed and your body pressing back into the wall, hoping it'd absorb you if that door opens. Listening for every sound, any pin drop, even an exhale from beyond that doorway. Luckily, Simon seemed to be out for the day.
Hurriedly, nearly running, you steady yourself against the wall as you rush down to the corner of the hallway, finally finding your room.
Turning the handle, it's not locked, it's broken. It opens with ease.
Entering the room slowly, pushing the doorway aside, the crackle of glass beneath your boots as you step forwards, clothes and picture frames laying scattered.
The mattress flipped and ripped open, springs and cotton cut from it. Your wall of metals and certificates, from acts of bravery and mementos of valor, discarded, later you'd find them in the trash, one with a bullet lodged into the gold.
Sniffling as you leaned down, picking a specific frame off the ground, the only one that hadn't been broken. Laying along the ruined rug, with no care for the glass digging through your jeans, you stare at the still shot of your family.
The only family you had outside of Task Force 141, your father and his sister, military brats themselves, until their retirement. Your mother had passed, or just up and left, days after your 5th birthday, you weren't completely sure, the story kept changing every year. But, these two were the only family you've ever known, ever had, until you joined the military, following in their footsteps.
They'd been so proud when you arrived back after your first assignment, in truth you were heavily traumatized, but seeing them, you just had to smile. Having a family that understood the harsh toll on the line of a trooper, now a lieutenant, it was always easier to bring your troubles to them. But, they were also military nuts so "suck it up" was also a quick go to answer from your aunt, while your father was the smoother talker.
They had met Simon, loved him, his rank, his love for you, his seriousness. They trusted him completely with your heart.
So, when he called them, after the evidence leaked...
They believed him.
"What're you talking about?" You took the handle of the chair in your grip, easing you down into it as your legs do weak at what you were hearing. "I didn't...I didn't do it, Dad."
"Do you know how humiliating and disappointing--how it felt to hear him say that to me, hm?" he says, static crackles on the reciever. "My daughter...my own flesh and blood...working with terrorists--"
"I'm not working with anyone! Are you-" you huff out a breath of disbelief. "Are you even listening to me? I've never betrayed the code. How can you think that way of me?"
For a moment, he's silent. "Alright, then," he began. "Than, what'd you do? huh?"
"What--what..."
"Oh, come on, (Y/n)!" your father yells. "What did you do?! What could they possibly have had on you that made you the most likely target? You had to have had done something, been somewhere, were with somebody you weren't supposed to be with! They didn't just get that information from anywhere."
"What the fuck--" Your expression twists with frustration and misery, running your hand through your hair, pulling at it. "I've sacrificed every part of myself for this job, for this team, what do I have to gain from throwing that all away? They send me everywhere, places you've never heard of, places you'll never hear about and people you'll never have to meet, because of me! Why would you just believe Simon? Why couldn't you just wait to talk to me?!"
Hearing your father scoff at your words was painful. "What reason do I have not to believe him? He knows you, maybe even better than any of us. Besides, he was going to be my son in law--"
"I'm your daughter! Fuck Simon, what about me? You'd believe him instead?"
He sighs. "Listen, you're upsetting Cass. We didn't expect your call. I gotta make this brief..."
"You're upset?" pulling at your hair, sucking in sharply. "I'm the one who's permanently fucking altered here. What do either of you have to be upset about?!"
"Watch your fucking mouth!" he seethes. The anger in his voice isn't new, but the way he spits it at you is. "You did this to yourself, I didn't. Maybe that's what your nightmares were about, am I right? Your guilt?"
Wiping the streaks of tears that had fallen down your face, lips quivering and chest aching with sobs you frustratedly shoved down. "Why don't you believe me?"
"I don't deserve the disgrace that will come with you as my kin, I've lived my part of this war. No daughter of mine should even be in this fucking position," your father spat, disgusted into the receiver. Suddenly, he was the cruel, bitter old man your mother had always known him to be, you wished she had stayed to at least remind you of that. Maybe it wouldn't have hurt as much. "You should be ashamed of yourself, but at least you got yourself out it. The least you could do for us."
"Well--what does that mean?" you spoke, quietly.
"Don't call again..."
"Dad, no--" you break this time, a sob escaping you.
"Me and your Aunt Cass..."
"Daddy please, don't do this--"
"..We've decided to cut ties. We're not taking any heat from this, you're on your own," he finishes, clearing his throat, waiting a moment, listening to the pleads and cries of his only daughter, his once pride. "You take care of yourself. Goodbye, kid."
"Why can't you just believe me? Why?!" you cried.
"Don't come to the house."
"No, no,--" the line goes dead. And staring down at your phone, his caller id going blank and the call disconnecting.
Your phone all of a sudden feels heavy, the device and your hand falling down to your thigh, before the phone slips out of your grip and onto the floor. You sit there silently, until your tears drop up and even after.
Staring at the photo now was haunting in its own way, it was just another painful reminder.
Using the bed frame to stand to your feet, your grip on the frame is painful as you squeeze it, the glass cracks audibly.
"Bonnie..."
Whipping around at the sound of John MacTavish's voice, you back up a few steps at the sight of him, your back hitting the edge of your desk.
He reaches out as you stumble, before his fingers curl back into his palm as you find your balance, his hands receding back to his sides. He doesn't enter the room, just lingering just beyond the doorway, his eyes flickering around the room, guiltily.
"I didn't know--we didn't know you were out," he speaks quietly, as opposed prideful personality that translated into his voice usually.
You say nothing.
In the dark, your eyes are wide and your shoulders are tensed up, he can see the glint of your leg braces, the iv pole at the side, the scar beneath your eye. You looked terrified to see him.
"We were coming back to clean up today, just got back from...from a mission..." he stutters on his words, shifting his feet.
"It's been a week."
His lips press together hearing your voice. "I know..." Johnny glances around at the room he'd let those officers destroy, it hadn't been them, but they might as well had done it. "I know...we just...didn't know it was so bad."
"Really?" your voice is mockingly sweet, drawing out the word. "You didn't know? Well look..." you hold up your family photo, the light in the hallway catching on the glass. "You missed one."
Your hand dropping, the heavy frame comes down just as fast, ramming into the ground, the glass practically exploding on impact.
Johnny flinches, the photo of your family...He looks back to you, surprised. "Bonnie..."
Snatching the next closest thing from your desk, a ceramic cup. "Oh, wow, can't believe you guys missed this one," you chuck it into the wall. It breaks on impact, the remains scatter along the flipped mattress and onto the floor. "That used to be my favorite mug by the way."
The Scotsman worriedly steps forwards, 'Lass, I'm sorry--"
"FUCK YOU!" you spat, coming into the light. You're sure you look deranged, and you didn't care. You could've wrapped your hands around his throat, killed him right on the floor and you wouldn't have blinked. "It doesn't mean anything! 'I'm sorry', 'I'm sorry', 'I'm sorry', over and over and over again! As if you shouldn't be! Your apologies mean fuck all."
"I know...I know," he breathes. "But, I've gotta say it anyway, bonnie. I should've believed you, there was no reason not to. I know that now. I just--"
"Believe me!" you cut him off with a yell. "Trust me! Fucking 'HELP ME'!" you screamed with the same fever as your days in the interrogation room, that terrible cell, the cold, the burn and pain. "I cried it all to you, to all of you, and nobody came. Nobody came for me," you breathe in sharply. "It doesn't matter what you should've done. You didn't do it!"
Johnny's eyes are red, he opens his mouth, closes it and then swallows down whatever chokes him up as he looks at you. "I should've came for you. I wish I did. I wanted to, Bonnie..." he steps forwards, and you recede back away from him, your eyes narrowed with violence. "I'll never forgive myself for not listening to you. For not coming to help you. For laying a hand on you. I'm so sorry, (Y/n). I'm sorry..."
I'll never forgive myself... "That makes two of us," you assured.
Johnny's eyes widen, before they close, his guilt ever consuming. He can't help but understand, to respect your decision, to know things can never be ok again. "(Y/n)...."
Grabbing hold of the nearest thing, a pencil cup, you hurl it at Johnny. He doesn't put his hands up, flinching as it hits him, the metal clinking against his kevlar, eyes closing then opening, he stands still. "I don't forgive. I don't accept your apology. I don't fucking care about it!" with each sentence you throw something else his way, a broken frame, the trash bin, a pillow, the CD player.
His hand has to come up for the knife you unsheathe, a memento from one of your missions, it's rusted, ancient probably. But, you hadn't given it up to a museum or to pawn, you had nearly died on this mission, saving Johnny ironically. You had to keep it.
Seeing the weapon, his defensive position is instinctive but his hands drop just as fast, he understands, you need this. You deserve this. "If you need to..." he speaks. Your eyes flicker up to him, away from the knife. "If you need to, I get it..."
And you need to. You really fucking do.
Your grip on the knife is dangerously hard, it hurts.
Looking at Johnny, he'd been your brother in more than a few ways on and off the field, he had been your comfort, your friend, your family. You had bled with him, held onto him as he carried you from the battlefield, joked, laughed, screamed and cried. You've loved him for years.
He'd had a rough few nights you could see that. He was quieter, reserved. Almost as terrified to see you, as you had been of him.
And you could kill him right now and never bat an eye.
And so, throwing that knife was so fucking easy.
Johnny's eyes close as you do just that, fists clenching and teeth biting down on his tongue to prepare for the pain.
The ancient weapon whiz's through the air, the sound is sharp and he knows it will cut through him like butter.
The thud rings in the room, and Johnny's eyes blow open wide, holding his breath as he collapses to his knees, before turning to you.
You dig into the pile of clothes that had been cast aside, a pair of sneakers and a new shirt. You don't look at him a single time as you take it all, stuffing them in a bag, and leaving the room, passing him completely, a limp in your step.
Johnny releases a pained breath, tears finally leaving him as he looks up, the knife lodged into the frame of the doorway, just barely missing him. The sleeve of his uniform ripped open.
He sits there in the quiet, destroyed room. A testimony to the relationship he's destroyed between you.
Part 4!! OUT NOW
#simon riley angst x reader#cod angst#tw torture#tw angst#simon ghost riley x reader#simon riley#ghost angst#ghost x reader#call of duty x reader#call of duty
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Arcane x Ransom! Reader
Summary: How would the Arcane characters react if the reader was held for ransom?
Characters: Jinx/Powder, Violet "Vi", Caitlyn Kiramman, Viktor, Jayce Talis, Sevika, Silco and Licker (mention).
Warning: Slight cursing and suggestive themes/implied sexual themes.
A/N: I literally got the idea for this request from Helluva Boss, particular episode 6 of season 2. I hope you all enjoy this though, I know I did!
Powder/Jinx
“You have who?! Where are they?!… You want me to pay you for them? Oh I’ll pay you alright!”
Jinx doesn’t take the idea of you getting hurt lightly. She already is super overprotective of her little trinket, so when she heard that you were being held for a price, she wasted no time grabbing Pow-Pow, Zapper and a bunch of chompers to aid her in her “heroic rescue” for her princess/prince. As soon as she is where you are held, you don’t have to see her to know she’s there for you. Don’t expect any talking, just laughter and hollers followed by gunfire, screams for mercy and explosions.
Before you know it, the Loose Cannon is standing in front of you, pulling you into the tightest hug ever and dressing your face with kisses. She will ask you countless questions while freaking out, beating herself up over you being in such a position. But when she feels you touch her and assure her you’re okay, she’s on cloud nine. As soon as she laces the area with bombs to blow it to kingdom come, she’s back at her hideout, being super affectionate and touchy the entire night. Don’t expect anyone to be touching you for months unless they want their head blown off.
Violet “Vi”
“… What?… You… You just pissed off the wrong woman.”
First word that you were kidnapped, Vi wasted no time hunting your captors down and beating them to a bloody pulp. The woman is like a bull seeing red knowing you were somewhere cold and scared away from home and her arms. So until you were back to her, anyone was able to get a personal greeting from the pink haired fighter. Vi is pretty merciful, but in situations like this, she isn’t afraid to push the envelope by giving life threatening injuries to the bastards that hurt you.
When she found you, she didn’t bother asking any questions or giving any money to your kidnappers, unless they counted a mouthful of fists and kicks as payment enough. When she’s done with her punishment, she’ll immediately scoop you into her arms and take the both of you back home, where she checks you for injuries and asks if you are okay. Please comfort her. She may act all tough and cool, but the situation scared her due to thinking she lost you just like everyone else. As soon as she knows you are alright, she’ll promise no one will ever do that to you again.
Caitlyn Kiramman
“You kidnapped Y/N? Why would- Who do you think you are? You better let them go right now!”
Caitlyn was used to people being kidnapped on the job, having to save them or negotiate with criminals for their safety. But she would have never imagined such a thing happening to you of all people. When she was told you were being held for ransom, she understandably panicked before taking deep breaths and thinking of how to get you back to her. The enforcer can easily scrounge up the money for you to be freed, because you were more important than any coin that reaches her pockets.
So when she arranges a meeting with your kidnappers and finds you so scared, she finds it hard to stop herself from grabbing you and making a run for it. If the kidnappers pull a fast one on her though, all bets are off and bullets are flying. When she has you back, she will watch you like a hawk and be on the defensive for a while. But if you assure her enough that you are okay, she will lighten up. On the bright side, after the incident she’s more romantic and spends more time with you in and out of work.
Viktor
“Look, I’m sure we can talk about this. I’ll get you the money, just. Please don’t hurt them…”
Viktor beat himself up when he heard you were taken away from him for monetary purposes. He just doesn’t understand how he would let this happen- How he would let someone easily take you under his nose and put you in harm’s way?! He could’ve waddled in his sorrows, but he couldn’t. He had to save you and he had to act fast! It would hurt him, but he would ask for assistance from Jayce and the council if he can. And if they can’t help him? Well. Maybe it was time to break out those so-called dangerous machines Heimerdinger warned him against using.
When he finds you, he’s wasting no time trying to negotiate a way around matters so you could be freed. And if those negotiations don’t go according to plan, then he’ll use his machinery and his brain to outsmart the criminals into freeing you. When you are back together, he’ll just. Hold you. Like you are a precious gemstone. He’ll promise you this will never happen again. No one will ever lay their hands on you again…
Jayce Talis
“Is this supposed to scare me? If anything, you should be the one scared- Do you know who I am?!”
Jayce does not take threats lightly, especially when it comes to his family, friends and his loved ones. As soon as he was told you were held for Ransom, he let his anger and determination to get you back fuel him to do anything to send a message and bring you back to safety. You will immediately know your boyfriend got the message because in a matter of hours, enforcers are barging into the area you were held like they were entering a war, shooting, punching and slamming anyone who got in their way from their goal; You.
And Jayce is in the middle of it all, swinging his hammer without remorse before running to your rescue as your knight in shining armor. As soon as you grab his hand, he’s walking you back to his place casually through the enforcers destroying everything in their sights and leaving a message for the assholes that took you; Never. Ever. Touch the councilman’s lover. Don’t expect to go anywhere without guards following you if Jayce isn’t, whether you want to or not. Jayce just can’t take the chance for you to be taken again. Is it extreme? Yes. But it was worth it.
Sevika
“Ransom? Seriously? Please, that’s nothing. And I’m about to show you why.”
When it comes to ransom, Sevika wasn’t new to having her friends or past lovers be kidnapped for money. So when she heard you were being held hostage, she casually grabbed her poncho, fixed her arm for a brawl and headed outside to round her co-workers up. When she found you and the ones that took you, she wasted no time kicking in the doors and sicking her co-workers on everyone before she made her way towards you after knocking some skulls in. She’ll ask if you are okay and especially check you for any injuries before grabbing you and joking how you found yourself in this predicament.
The fight rages on as soon as she places you outside for safety. Saving you wasn’t enough. No, she needed everyone to know that when someone messes with you, they have to deal with her and the rest of Zaun. When everything is over and done, Sevika will take you both back home and treat any injuries you want before kissing your cheek and simply talking as if you weren’t kidnapped to begin with. If you think she doesn’t care, then hoo boy. The way she’ll treat you that night in bed will make you think otherwise.
Silco
“Hmm… If I were you, I’d beg for mercy when I get there…”
Silco is never one to be threatened because he’s always the one making the threats. Hearing about you being held for Ransom made him immediately go on the move to round up Sevika to follow him in bringing you back to him. If he gets there and doesn’t find you anywhere, he will deliver a silent signal to bring the house down. But if you are present, then he won’t need violence to be delivered by his Right Hand. He’ll just need to put the fear of gods into your kidnapper.
He’ll paint them a picture of how he’ll find their families and let them listen to the melody of their bones breaking. How he’ll have Licker carve paintings into their bodies and let them choke on their own blood as they beg for mercy. What do they think of that? They wouldn’t like that at all. As a matter of fact, they would hate it so much that they would release you and fade from existence right there. As soon as you are back to Silco, he’s going to take you back home as if this was only a minor inconvenience. But as soon as you two are behind closed doors, he can’t help from keeping his hands to himself and make promises against your skin.
If you have any requests for Arcane, X-Men '97 or Blue Eye Samurai, send them my way!
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⋆₊˚⊹.𖥔 zoom, click, panic !
with your platform growing it's about time you get your own personal camera man! you probably should've put in the job description that the position involved working with a camgirl... maybe then sweet virgin nerd lee donghyuck wouldn't have applied for the job. now he's stuck with you, but he's determined to make it work.
alternatively, hyuck is a photography nerd who needs money for a new cameras and lenses, and you're a camgirl in desperate need of a cameraman.
virgin nerd!hyuck x camgirl!reader
genre : humor , coworkers? to lovers , college au , fluff , suggestive , haechan is an inexperienced LOSER we love to see it
warnings : sex jokes , death jokes, mean ass insults and comments , descriptions of sex and dirty acts , haechans first time seeing pussy irl , reader is open about sex and her body shes hot asf ofc
notes : two of my favorite things put together haechan and nerdy men (and he's a virgin hehe). i'm gonna enjoy this one and write as much flustered hyuck as i can. i'm gonna go with the flow with this one too which is why i'm not putting so much in the genre cause i wanna see how it goes and how i want to develop this plot.
playlist : positions , ariana grande | freak , doja cat | guess , charli xcx | kiss me more , doja cat | flamin' hot lemon , jaehyun | up to you , prettymuch | more than a woman , bee gees | telepatia , kali uchis | all mine , brent faiyaz
status : ongoing , updates x2 a week , tuesdays and thursdays
taglist : closedd !
yn’s group , hyuck’s group
intro
1 -> that's not my dick or anything
2 -> THE lee donghyuck
3 -> chat spam mommy
4 -> beyoncé eliminate him
5 -> big nerd dick
6 -> chicken nuggets
7 -> yes ma'am
8 -> pussy milk
9 -> i got something for u
10 -> sick to my stomach fam
11 -> king of dancehall
12 -> HUGE textbook
13 -> music production
TBD
extras :
TBD
#haechan#nct#nct dream#nct imagines#nct fluff#nct smau#nct social media au#nct fake texts#lee haechan#haechan imagines#haechan fluff#haechan smut#haechan smau#haechan social media au#nct social au#nct dream smau#nct dream fake texts#haechan texts#haechan fake texts
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