#of whish i have a whole damn lot

[prostocupoftea]

I have made a stickrr

Aww, look at him! Ah, it seems like he has something behind him- But, i mean, you wouldn't want to disturb him, right? (:

It came out good for the first time i think, hehe

And of course my object show style integral oc bc she is already everywhere and i show no signs of stopping

Also yes this is my work laptop. Yes it glows in the dark. I have no shame certified

[danganronpasurvivoraskblog]

Stirring Suspicion.

Well sweet fucking damn. You’re actually alive!

Words cannot describe just how worried we were!

Glad to see you’re still in one piece, despite everything...

Just say the word and I will supply anything you may need.

*As soon as Future Foundation returns to the tower with Maki and Seiko, the V3 gang are quick to appear and greet her. Seiko is supported away by the main members of the Future Foundation, while Kirumi and the others take care of Maki for the time being.

Everyone, please! I know you’re worried, but calm down and give Maki some space. Look at her. She’s clearly been through a lot since she got kidnapped. There’s nothing wrong with consoling her, but give her a chance to rest. 

It’s not just her body that’s exhausted...I’m amazed her spirit hasn’t shattered yet either...

...Right...Sorry.

Shuichi...It’s ok you know?

Huh?

I don’t mind...Honestly, being pampered would usually annoy me, but this time around it’s actually a refreshing change. And I know the whole backstory was fake and everything, but with the V3 history in my mind...I’ve been through a lot worse.

What Shirogane and her cronies did to me is nothing compared to what I had to go through when training to become an assassin. My fortitude is stronger than that.

Maki...

It’s been a while, right? The least I could do is greet you with a smile.

I...see...If that’s how you really feel, then...P-Please excuse me...

*WHUMP!*

...!?

...*sniff!* *sob*

*Shuichi glomps Maki into a hug and starts to cry.

Aw Shuichi...Never knows how to take his own advice...

You three did a good job today.

No. It mostly Tenko. Kaito overwhelmed by emotion and Gonta not sure what to do himself. She one thinking straight and taking charge.

Th-That’s not true! I-I was just speaking for Seiko. She’s my boss, remember? I can’t look pathetic in front of her!

You’re selling yourself short Tenko. You should be proud of yourself.

By the way, where’s Kaede and the other guy? I thought they’d be back by now.

“Other guy?”

*Shuichi, still bleary eyed, pulls away from Maki.

She said she was...*sniff* going to scout the area. She’ll be back any moment now.

And she’s right here!

Ah, perfect timing!

Maki! Hey! It’s really you!

Yeah...And it’s really you Kaede. I missed that energy-

!!?

...Well...Look who the cat dragged in. Good to see you’re still in one piece, Maki.

Oh yeah! A lot has happened Maki! There’s so much stuff we need to tell-

You...!

H-Huh?

*All of a sudden, Maki stands up with a dark and enraged expression, and unholsters the knife from her belt!

YOOUUU!!

WHAT THE-!?

Woah Woah Woah HEY HEY HEY!

MAKI-ROLL WHAT ARE YOU DOING!?

*SHING!* *CLASH!*

...!?

...!

*Maki suddenly lunges towards Rantaro, brandishing the knife and about to slice him, when Kaede gets in the way, blocking the blade with her Electromagnetic Spear.

KYAGH!

UGH! Drgh...H-Huh?

Kyrgh...

*WHOOSH!* *WHOOSH!* *WHOOSH!* *WHISH!*

*Kaede thrusts Maki backwards, who with some quick feet movements, stays upright and puts some distance between them. For emphasis, Kaede spins the spear around and points it at Maki as a warning.

Kaede!? Wh-What is THAT!?

HRUAGH!

*CLASH!*

HUP! RAGH!

Rggh!

*CHING!* *CHANG!* *BASH!*

HIYAGH!

*CLASH!* 

GRGH! HAAH!

*Kaede doesn’t have a moment to answer Keebo’s query, as Maki rushes back towards Rantaro once again. When she goes in for a stab, Kaede once again gets in the way and deflects her back. Maki then makes some quick slices with the knife, but despite her speed, Kaede is able to keep up! She then spins her whole body around and smacks Maki with the spear. Maki blocks this blow with the blade, but is sent skidding back along the ground, only to immediately rush forward again.

HYAAGH!

HUP! Krgh!

TCH!

*WHOOSH!* *TWANG!*

DUAHAGH! Oof!

DRAGH!

!!??

*SMASH!*

*As Maki rushes back towards her, Kaede throws the spear towards her. Maki dodges, and thinking she has an opening, rushes towards Kaede with her head down. However, she is unprepared as Kaede pulls the spear back to her, catching Maki’s feet and tripping her up. Maki quickly rolls out of the way and back onto her feet when Kaede tries to smash the spear down on her.

KRGH!

DRAGH!

*CLASH!* *WHOOSH!* *WHOOSH!* *WHOOSH!*

HOOOYAGH!

NGH! HAH!?

*What follows is a very dynamic clash, as Maki recovers and continues fighting. Kaede continues to hold her off, as both girls move and react faster than anyone can keep up with. Maki resorts to dodging most of Kaede’s blows while Kaede resorts to blocking most of Maki’s. Eventually, Maki, brandishing her blade, rushes towards Kaede and slams into her with her feet. Maki then uses this movement to push herself into the air.

Hup! HIYAGH!

*She flies through the air, landing on the wall of the room, and then bounds off it, soaring back down towards Kaede and Rantaro, ready to strike...However...

CHAGH!

*WHOOOSH!*

!!!!???

HAAAAAAAAGGH!

*SLAAAAAAMMM!!!*

DOHUGH!

*CRASH!*

*Maki is blissfully unprepared, as Kaede suddenly uses her weapon to propel and soar through the air. She gets above Maki, with a raised leg; and just in time to see the bewildered expression on the assassin’s face, brings it down on her, and axe-kicks her smack-dab in the jaw! Maki flies back towards the ground and crashes into the corner that separates the floor and wall.

Krgh...Ngh...

*CHUNK!*

!!!??

*Before she has a chance to get back to her feet, Maki’s eyes widen in shock, as Kaede’s spear lodges into the wall next to her, catching her clothes and pinning her there.

*GASP!* *PANT!* *WHEEZE* Ah...haah...Are you done!? *pant...*

*Severely out of breath, Kaede continues to stand in front of Rantaro, trying to protect him. 

...

Y-Yeah...Yeah, I’m done...

Are you sure?

Yeah...I’m spent as it is anyway...That took basically all I had.

Good. Now stay down!

*SHUNK!* *WHOOSH!* *CATCH!*

*Kaede calls the spear back to her, catching it in her hands and brandishing it.

WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT KAEDEEE!?

Huh!? What!? She tried to attack Rantaro and I protected him!

But you-!? But that-!? How did you-!? YOU WERE FLYING!!?

Can we discuss this later!? We’ve got more important problems on hand right now!

*Kaito and Tenko rush over to support Maki to her feet.

What the heck was that about Maki? Why did you...?

You know, I’m curious as well. As far as I’m aware, including our time during the Killing Game, you and I have barely even spoken a word to one another before now. 

Just what could I have possibly done to become a target of the Ultimate Assassin herself like this? 

Rantaro...Don’t think you can escape my wrath just because Kaede managed to block my attack...!

What? So you DO want some more!?

Kaede, stop! I think you’ve done enough, don’t you!?

Wha-!? She attacked FIRST Kaito!

I KNOW she attacked first, but that doesn’t mean you need to hit back twice as hard! 

It doesn’t matter at this point anyway...! If Kaede trusts Rantaro enough to block an attack for him, then I guess I can’t do anything.

What do you mean?

You made a mistake siding with ERR0RM3SS4GE. If I were you, I wouldn’t believe a single word that comes out of his mouth...!

Look Maki...I’ll be honest...We’ve been through a lot up to this point despite only reuniting recently, and to be frank, I don’t trust Rantaro as much as you seem to think I do. But that doesn’t mean I’m going to stand by and do nothing when you lunge at him with a knife!

Did Rantaro do something wrong? Gonta doesn’t think he as bad as you’ve made him out to be...

Fine...I don’t expect you to take me at my word after this, but if you want me to explain, we can start with you, Rantaro. Take it out. The Flashback Light you’re hiding on your person. Don’t try to hide it, I saw it when I lunged in the first time.

F-Flashback light...!?

Hmph...You’re impressively perceptive. Guess nothing shies away from those eyes.

*Rantaro reaches into his pocket, and pulls out a familiar shaped object.

A flashback light!?

So you DID have one? What’s that for?

I’ll tell you what it’s for...and exactly what he used it for...

That...is the same Flashback Light he used to erase Kaede’s memories, turning her into Kaede Sanada...!

*Everyone looks back and forth between Maki, Kaede and Rantaro with panic stricken eyes.

Say WHAT!?

But that can’t be! Organization Zetsubou were the one’s who erased Kaede’s memories!? To stop her leaking info about Danganronpa Survivor, right!?

That’s what I thought too...! But then I found out the truth from Uchui Kamukura himself in Zetsubou base. I didn’t believe him at first, but then he showed me evidence.

Video footage of Kaede in a room, strapped to a chair, being blasted with a Flashback Light...and the perpetrator in the room with her? None other than Rantaro Amami himself...!

...

Then...from the very beginning, Rantaro was...!?

Hey! Explain yourself Rantaro! Else I might beat the answers out of you!

I wouldn’t be so brazen. After all, Kaede seems dead set on protecting me.

Don’t jump to conclusions Rantaro. Like I said, I don’t trust you as much as I pretend, and I’m sure as hell not your personal bodyguard!

*She points her spear at his throat.

Now tell me the truth, or I might throw caution to the wind and beat the answers out of you MYSELF...!

I see...seems you’re all of a single mind in this after all...

*sigh* Yes. What Maki said was true. ERR0RM3SS4GE were indeed the one’s who brainwashed Kaede and erased her memories.

RANTARO!?

I don’t expect you to believe me, but I meant no ill intent with such a thing. I was just doing my job.

“Job” my ass! You-

Woah! Wh-What the hell happened in here?

*The conversation is cut suddenly, as Mona arrives in the room.

Apologies for the mess Mona. What is the matter?

Future Foundation are assembling all it’s key members in the central meeting room downstairs. They apparently want Shuichi, Kaede and Rantaro to be there.

Ah, perfect timing. Let’s get going then.

Wait, we’re not done yet!

*Rantaro ignores Shuichi and heads out of the room.

...!

[engie-ivy]

Remus and James find out Sirius has been hiding their friendship from his parents. Maybe they jump to conclusions a bit too fast.

“Apparently we, mere halfblood and blood traitor, are deemed unworthy of the heir of the ‘Noble and Most Ancient House of Black’. I suppose he doesn’t want to lose face by letting his precious pureblood relatives find out he has befriended such inferior wizards.”

A bunch of berks

“What the fuck, Sirius!” James is standing with his hands on his hips, glaring at Sirius. If the tone of his voice and his posture weren’t enough to show his anger, the fact that he uses Sirius’ name instead of his nickname does it.

“What’s going on?” Remus asks warily, as he approaches their table.

“Prongs has been reading my letter from home,” Sirius says, glaring at James.

Remus looks from Sirius to James. Sirius never talks about his family. Remus and James only know what everyone knows based on their reputation: they’re supposedly stiff, old-fashioned, and narrow-minded. Remus and James never bring them up either. They know Sirius isn’t like that, and that’s enough. Besides, you can’t really ask your best mate ‘oi, are your parents really as horrible as everyone says?’

James rolls his eyes. “Not on purpose! It was lying on the table and I picked it up, not knowing what it was.”

“And you didn’t realise until after you read the whole thing?” Sirius asks, raising an eyebrow.

“Then I was too appalled to stop reading!” James snaps back. He straightens the piece of parchment in his hand. “Moony, hear this!”

Remus opens his mouth to say he really doesn’t want to hear Sirius’ private correspondence without his permission, but what James reads to him makes the words die in his throat.

“ ‘We don’t see why you should want to stay at Hogwarts for the Holidays. Gryffindor already has hardly any decent purebloods, and I expect the few there are will be going to their families themselves. It is quite pointless for you to stay there on your own’ Or this sentence! ‘We understand that in such an abdominal environment as Gryffindor House the temptation to form relations with witches or wizards of a lesser descent can be strong, but we expect you will be sensible enough to continue to solely associate with decent purebloods, or at least as decent as the ones in Gryffindor can be’.”

Remus frowns. “Solely associating with purebloods? That doesn’t make any sense.” The Potters are infamous blood traitors in their circles, and no one would mistake the Lupins for purebloods.

“Well, you see, Moony,” James says. “Turns out Sirius here has been hiding our friendship from his family.”

Remus stares at Sirius. “Why?”

James huffs. “Apparently we, mere halfblood and blood traitor, are deemed unworthy of the heir of the ‘Noble and Most Ancient House of Black’. I suppose he doesn’t want to lose face by letting his precious pureblood relatives find out he has befriended such inferior wizards.”

Sirius grits his teeth. “I never said that!”

“So you deny that you’ve been purposely hiding our friendship to please you’re parents and their blood supremacy ideas?”

“No, but-“

“Well then,” James cuts him off.

“It’s not important whether they know!” Sirius says, almost sounding desperate. “They’re not important.”

“If they weren’t important to you, you wouldn’t have gone through the trouble of pretending!” James argues back.

“You’re embarrassed about being friends with us?” Remus whispers. “You’re ashamed of us?”

Sirius looks at him with big, pleading eyes. “Moony, no...”

Somewhere in the back of his mind Remus knows they’re maybe being a bit unfair. They’re jumping to conclusions without giving Sirius a chance to explain. But James is raised in such a way that he’s completely allergic to anything that even leans towards blood supremacy, and Sirius pretending to uphold his parents blood supremacy ideas is definitely enough to set him off. And Remus... Remus is not a very confident person, but if there’s anyone who makes him feel like he’s worth a damn and good enough just the way he is, then it’s Sirius. And to now find out that Sirius is actually ashamed of him... Well, that hurts. A lot. So neither Remus nor James is really thinking clearly.

“Is this also why you never want to meet up during the breaks?” Remus asks.

“I hadn’t even thought of that!” James says. “I guess we’re good enough to hang out with at Hogwarts, without many other options, but when you can also choose to be with your precious pureblood friends and family, we don’t make the cut anymore.”

“That’s not... I don’t even have...” Sirius sputters. “You don’t know what it’s like!”

“Don’t know what it’s like?” Remus asks, incredulously. “You really think our parents didn’t have any reservations when they heard we befriended a Black? But we stood up for you! We told them you were nothing like the rumours say. We defended you, but I guess you didn’t feel like doing the same for us.”

Sirius stares at the ground. “I just didn’t think it was worth all the trouble,” he says softly.

“We weren’t worth it?” James asks. “Okay then, noted. We were wrong when we defended you anyway. You’re exactly like your ancestors. You’re a real Black. They can be proud of you.”

Sirius just stares at him for a while, face gone pale. For a moment, Remus thinks he’s going to tell James not to talk shite about his family, but then he just turns around and walks away.

Remus sighs. “I don’t think we handled that very well. What he does and doesn’t tell his parents is his own choice, after all.”

“But he’s been pretending to uphold their blood supremacy ideas!” James says defensively. “Or what if he’s not pretending with them, but with us?”

Remus shakes his head. “Prongs, we’ve known him for years! One letter can’t suddenly make him an entirely different person.”

James sighs. “I suppose you’re right. It’s none of our business if he wants to play the perfect pureblood son for his parents.” He looks hesitantly in the direction Sirius had gone off to. “Should I go after him?”

“Probably not right now,” Remus replies. “He’s upset, we’re angry and hurt. It’s probably best if we all calm down a bit and then have another conversation about it.”

They still have classes the rest of the day. Sirius doesn’t sit with them, and looks positively miserable. That’s enough for Remus to whish they had just talked it out right away. To make a bad day worse, they have to face Boggarts in Defence Against the Dark Arts. Remus is anxiously standing in line next to James. What kind of mad professor would think it okay to let students face their biggest fears in front of all their peers?

Soon enough, it’s Sirius’ turn, and Remus and James watch in amazement as the Boggart turns into his mother. Remus recognizes her from the glimpses he has seen at King’s Cross, but even if he hadn’t, it’s clear from her haughty air and typical aristocratic features. What’s also hard to believe, is that Sirius actually flinches when he sees her.

Even with having learned that morning that Sirius has been lying about their friendship to live up to his parents’ standards, it still comes as a shock to Remus that it’s actually Sirius’ biggest fear to disappoint his mommy. It seems so unlike Sirius, and quite frankly, it pisses Remus off that he cares so much about that lot’s good opinion. Judging by the way James’ jaw has tightened, he feels much the same.

They fully expect Sirius’ mother to begin scolding him, and they’re quite taken aback when she... smiles. It’s an approving and proud smile, and she looks at Sirius with admiration.

“Sirius, my son,” she speaks fondly. “You are truly a perfect representative of the Black family values. You’re exactly like your ancestors. You’re a real Black. We’re so proud of you,” she finishes with almost an exact echo of James’ words.

Sirius puts on a brave face, squares his shoulders, and casts a well-aimed Ridikkulus. The black stole his mother is wearing over her robes suddenly turns into a big, black dog, very reminiscent of Padfoot, who jumps on the ground and bites her in her arse. She jumps with a shriek and the Boggart retreats. Sirius turns around and walks out of the room not meeting anyone’s eye.

Students are whispering and Professor Flitwick looks confused. After all, why would someone’s biggest fear be their mother being proud of him?

Remus stares after Sirius. So he’s not afraid of falling out with his family and earning their disapproval. He’s actually afraid of fitting in with his family and earning their approval.

James grimaces. “We really buggered up, didn’t we?”

Sirius is sitting on the stairs with his knees tucked against his chest. James sits down on one side of him, and Remus on the other.

“We’re a bunch of berks,” James says. “If you don’t want to talk to me anymore, you have every right.”

Sirius shrugs. “You weren’t wrong. I have been hiding out friendship from my family.”

Without thinking, Remus wraps an arm around Sirius’ waist and he feels a tingle in his stomach when Sirius leans in to him. “We were just attacking you without giving you a chance to explain. We judged you without knowing the situation. We’re sorry, Padfoot.”

“I’m sorry too.”

“You did nothing wrong,” James argues.

“I made you believe I was ashamed of you. I hate that,” Sirius replies. “You must believe me when I say I don’t think myself better than you because of the bloody blood that flows through my veins! Quite the opposite,” he adds with a murmur.

“Of course we believe you!” James exclaims. He nudges Sirius with his shoulder. “How could we not? You just irrefutably proved that being like your family is your literal worst fear! We’d have to be massive idiots to not believe you.”

“Well...” Sirius says with a teasing smirk.

“Oi!” James shoves Sirius playfully.

Remus laughs, but something is still gnawing away at him. If Sirius doesn’t seek his parents’ approval, why hide their friendship from them? For that matter, they still don’t know why they never see him during the breaks. And his own mother being his biggest fear is just wrong, especially with the way Sirius flinched upon seeing her. Something is off.

But for now, James and Sirius are laughing together again. For now, Sirius is pressed up against Remus, resting his head on Remus’ shoulder, with Remus’ arm firmly around his waist. For now, it’s alright.

[liz-pooh]

13/100 days of productivity

Well, Good morning!

I am sorry! I didnt forget to post anything but my depression wasnt having it. Yesterday was a really hard day. Not only did my mum got food poisoning, i was so stressed that i my stomach and anxiety thought that my body should crash down. So i was lying on the couch the whole damn day with cramps and feeling nauseous as f***.

So yeah, here i am! BUUUUT i am back, and i am kicking depressions a** with motivation and productivity!! I am so ready for that :D

BTW i was already so productive and its just 8.30 in the morning.

I cleaned my room, did the laundry, fed my chinchilla, i put clean sheets on my bed anddddd i took the trash outside! I am happy not just bc when i have my depressed phase i am unable to do even the easiest things, so i am beyond happy about that.

On my To-Do-List for the day is:

- essay (which is due on monday)

- start studying the index cards

- update bullet journal

- read a new chapter of "the song of achilles"

So, a lot to do but i will manage that. Also, today i am doing a self care saturday night with watching gilmore girls and eating hummus chips. Btw, i am trying to go back to my vegetarian lifestyle. I had to end it bc i became iron anemic but i got medicine for that so i am allowed to start again, which makes me happy bc i am not a huge fan of meat. (but i will die for a schnitzel! Thats the only thing i love)

So yeah, i whish you guys a great weekend and i hope you arent mad about me for not posting! Have a good and productive day and stay motivated!

[minsimagines]

what’s in a name | demon!j.k

next part

A/N: part two coming soon! also, images are not mine, i’ve just put together the collage. credit to owners! and also, can we talk about his hair? specifically in the header under here? help. feel free to talk to me about his hair.

   warnings: none, i think??

   summary: On the day she’s about to turn 18 years old, Y/N finds out she belongs to a demon.

★ ⋆ ✰ ✦ ☾ ✮ ⁎ ★ ⋆ ✰ ☾ ⁎ ✦ ✮ ⁎ ☾ ★ ⋆ ✰

  You stood in the middle of the living room of your parents’ gigantic house, staring at their faces. Their expression held sadness, though your rage didn’t leave room for pity. Your eyes flickered over their bodies, wondering if they really even were your parents. You didn’t want to believe it.

  “When did you do it?”

  “Sweetheart, we’re sorry,” your mother tried to console you, but you took a furious step back.

  “When!?”

  You mothers brows pushed together in a sad, despaired frown. “We contacted him on your first birthday.”

  “So, you sold me, signed my whole life off before I’d even lived any of it?” You asked, your voice a mere whisper.

  “You’ll be safe, that was the deal! He’s not going to hurt you,” your father said urgently.

  “The deal,” you scoffed, a humorless smile on your face. “And what happens if it doesn’t get me?”

  Your father’s face dropped. “I… I don’t know.”

  “I guess we’ll find out,” you muttered, watching their faces twist into expressions of fear.

  “Sweetie, running won’t help, he’ll find you!” Your mother yelled, desperately. You slowly shook your head and ran out of the living room, one of many in the huge mansion. You ran past old paintings and staircases, your shoes tapping against ancient floors. You didn’t take anything but yourself and your phone with you, you didn’t stop to find out if they were following. You ran through the huge kitchen, slipping past chefs in the middle of preparing supper. Through the windows you could see the sun was setting.

 Throwing the backdoor open, you bolted through the massive garden, and the bushes shaped as bunnies. It had been for you, they’d said. All they did, was for you. What a load of crap. You would never let yourself be sold like some kettle. You were a human being with a mind of your own. You were turning 18 as soon as the clock rang midnight, and your parents would never see you again after this.

  Passing through intricate gardenwork, you ran into the dense forest behind your parents’ estate. You’d always played out there when you were young, and you’d always swore you’d had a guardian angel watching over you in those woods. You’d fallen out of tall trees, you’d scraped every inch of your body on branches, stumbled over stones. There had been incidents where you should have died, yet you never came out of the trees with anything more than a pale red patch wherever you’d hurt yourself. Perhaps the guardian angel was still in there.

  You didn’t waste a second. You heard your parents and a few servants call after you, but you blocked them out. You ran and ran and ran until you couldn’t breathe.

  Falling to your back in the middle of a meadow, you gasped for air. You didn’t care how much sound it made, or how loud you were crying. You had to get it out. Your chest hurt; your soul hurt. Weren’t parents supposed to love their children? Weren’t they supposed to protect their children?

  You didn’t know how long you laid in the small, damp meadow. Your jeans were soaked and probably green on the backside. Your body was numb from crying. From realizing your life was a lie. Your life had been a means to and end for them. You couldn’t fathom how anyone could do such a thing, and to their own child!?

  As you stared up at the sky, you knew he’d be coming for you. If it was really true, then he would come for you no matter where you were. Unless you were dead. No, didn’t demons rule the dead as well? The air felt thick.

  “I take it you’re not happy with your current… predicament.”

  You jumped up at the deep voice. A hand flew to your chest, your wide eyes staring at the man leaning against the trunk of a tall tree. He was… well he was breathtaking. Hair, black as night, framed his face. His eyes were dark, intense and amused as he watched you, blinking lazily. His hands were in the pockets of his dress pants. He wore a black suit, which one would usually find weird deep in a forest, yet he seemed to just… fit.

  You didn’t say anything. What were you to say? That you didn’t like it? You thought that part was pretty obvious. Your eyes flickered over his appearance. Had you not known his true nature; you might have freely spoken to him, told him you weren’t going with him and how you were going to be free. You might have been interested in what he had to say. But you knew, and you didn’t want to know any more.

  “Come here,” he said, his voice didn’t leave room for discussion, but you were frozen. Both in shock and fear. He watched you, seemingly patient, his eyes not leaving yours for even a split second. Did he even blink? You didn’t think he did.

  “Don’t make me repeat myself,” he muttered, his voice turning darker along with the look in his eyes. You felt your vision blur as you shakily took steps towards the man. The edge of his full lips twitched up in a smirk at your compliance.

  He stood up straight, towering over you as you stopped in front of him, a hot tear rolling down your cheek. You hated him. Or, maybe you hated your parents. You didn’t know, you just knew you didn’t want to be a slave.

  “Please,” you whispered, whishing for nothing else than to be left alone. You wanted to be away from him, from your parents, from their stupid massive estate. You didn’t care about any of it, you wanted to be free.

   He decided to take your plea as a wish for him to take you right away.

  “As you wish,” he whispered, his eyes turning as dark as night as he reached out for your waist, pulling you against him. You yelped and pushed your hands against a chiseled chest. The world around you turned loopy and dark smoke enveloped you both. You instinctively gripped his jacket, your wide eyes staring around yourself in terror. He watched in amusement, finding himself already loving the look of fear in your eyes. Your big orbs glowed with horror, and he could stare at the wonderful sight for hours.

  The world shook and trembled around you as you were both swallowed by the darkness. A grunt left your lips out of fear, your eyes squeezing shut. What was he doing? Was he going to hurt you?

–

  You startled upright, your arms grabbing at your body, your lungs gasping for air. You looked around yourself, but it was so dark, you could barely make out anything. You could, however, tell it wasn’t your room. It looked modern, stylish, dark. Black furniture against dark walls. Everything was so dark. The bed sheets, black silk, slick around your bare legs.

  You threw the covers off, your jaw dropping. You were wearing a big t-shirt, down to the top of your thighs. Your eyes carefully wandered around the room once more, your mind completely blank. You couldn’t remember how you got to this room, or where your clothes had gone. Or… if it was you who removed them.

  Quietly slipping out of bed, you slowly stepped towards the window. The curtains were closed, and you hoped the view could give you a clue to where you were. Gently taking a hold of the fabric, you pulled them apart.

  The view… though broad, was unhelpful. You looked down, and your breath caught in your throat at the height. You were so far above ground. You could see so far, yet you had no idea what city it was. The lights from the streets and the buildings were beautiful, but the sinking feeling in your stomach was not.

  Hands wrapped around your waist from behind, and you squealed in surprise, your body jerking forwards. The hands held you back from bumping your head into the glass. You spun around and found a pair of dark eyes staring down at you, looking very amused. You, were not. You glared up at him, your cheeks warming. Had he been in there the whole time? How did he sneak up on you like that?

  “Are you insane?” You asked, your voice low, feeling agitated. You’d never asked to be put in this situation, and you definitely couldn’t remember asking him to change your clothes for you.

  “Whatever do you mean?” He asked sarcastically, his lips curling up in a way too sweet smile, hands pulling you closer. You pulled a face and pushed against his chest, but his grip was locked behind your back. You shot him a look, which he mirrored, mocking you.

  “Where are my clothes?”

  “Trash.”

  “Excuse me!?” You yelled, your brows furring. Who the hell did he think he was?

  “You went all crazy and ripped them,” he shrugged, as if that was something that could just happen to anyone. As if it happened to him a lot. You narrowed your eyes, not believing him.

  “You think I’m going to believe some story about me just suddenly going ham and tearing off my clothes? I’m no Hulk.”

  “I didn’t say I was totally out of blame,” he smirked, taking a step back from you. You frowned.

  “What did you do?”

  “I just took you here,” he said, cocking his head to the side. “You inhaled something you shouldn’t have, and you went nuts,” he smirked, turning and walking towards the door. You ran after him as he walked down the dark hallways.

  “Inhaled what?” You asked, your voice raised with anger. Why couldn’t he just explain it in a proper way? Why be so god damned mysterious?

  He abruptly stopped and spun around, giving you no time to slow down. You bumped right into his chest, though his body didn’t move an inch. It was like hitting a brick wall. A… soft, brick wall. He looked down at you and you had no chance of reading his eyes, they were just looking at you.

  “This,” he said, his voice deep as he held his hand out. His fingers slowly began turning black, as a soft mist formed in his palm. He held his hand a good distance away from you, yet you could smell it as if it was right in your face. It smelled caramel, and the forest after it rains. And leather. Your eyebrow twitched as you turned you head towards his hand. Your eyes peered into the mist, and the deeper you looked, the more delicious the smell got. The mist flickered like a flame, and you wondered if the mist was a result of his skin burning.

  His other hand grabbed a wrist you hadn’t realized you’d stretched out towards the mist, and he pulled you towards the other side of his body as he closed his palm and forced the mist away, his hand turning back to normal.

  His eyes shifted as he looked at you, his expression one of confusion. You could only stand there and gape at him. You couldn’t wrap your mind around what had happened. It was as if you had been in a trance, and as he put the mist away, you felt almost sad. Maybe you really had gone crazy, like he said you had.

  He turned his body to face you, his hands on your upper arms as he leaned down towards your face. You looked up at him with wide eyes, your heartbeat picking up. Was he going to eat you?

  “What did it smell like?” He asked, almost carefully, which didn’t fit his image at all. You frowned at the question. Why did it matter what it smelled like?

  “Uhm… like a few things,” you said, uncertain. “A few things that have absolutely nothing to do with each other.”

  “What things?” He asked, more urgent.

  “Caramel,” you whispered. “And the forest. And leather.”

  He leaned back, and you watched as his eyes flickered all over your form. You swallowed, instinctively taking a step away from him. His eyes narrowed, and the intense look in his eyes returned. He was quiet for a while, and you didn’t dare move. You felt like a prey under his dangerous gaze. His dark t-shirt was tight around his firm muscles, and you swallowed, thinking about all the awful things he could do to you.

  “Y/N,” he whispers your name carefully, as if it was a prayer, and it knocked the wind out of you. Your mind began spinning, and all you could hear was his deep voice calling your name. You desperately looked up at him through your dazed vision. It felt like you were flying on clouds and being held down to the ground by bolts, bth at the same time.

  You tried speaking, but your lips just parted, no sound leaving them.

  “I know,” he whispered, as he took a few steps closer to you. You were frozen in your place, your skin tingling. His hands reached out, slowly, as if to not scare you, and rested on your upper arms. Your whole body practically vibrated at his touch, a shudder running down your spine and some of the tingling under your skin disappeared. You frowned, staring up at him, hoping he could give you an explanation. You mind was blank.

  He hummed, slowly letting his hands run down your arms. You stood there in wonder, amazed at how his touch seemed to make the heavy feeling lift. Though, if it was him who initially made you feel weird, then maybe it wasn’t so strange.

  “I’m sorry,” he muttered, pulling you into his chest in an embrace and your hands automatically rested on his waist. You wondered what he was sorry about, but the softness you felt inside was occupying your mind. It was strange – you’d met this man, this demon; he’d spoken a few words to you and taken you to what you presumed was his home. He… he owned you. He looked every bit a demon, all but the sharp teeth and claws. His deep voice, his heavy presence, his intense stare, his magic. Yet you didn’t really mind being in that apartment with him.

–

 The next few days were strange, to put it mildly. He would often scare the bejesus out of you by appearing right in front of you or engulfing the whole living room in shadow as he entered, his eyes glowing bright red. The sight scared you so bad you had to run straight to the bathroom to not pee yourself. He used every predatorial bone in his body, sneaking up on your from behind and pinching your waist. You’d scream. Each and every time.

  He took you out to fancy restaurants for dinner. You’d wake up and find expensive gift bags waiting for you in the kitchen, though he claimed it was all to make you look the part. He constantly asked what you wanted of certain things, and what you liked, though never straight out. It was always like a guessing game. He was mysterious, and nothing could ever be simple. You felt like he was somewhat doing the most to make you feel like living with him wasn’t a prison sentence. You didn’t feel like that, however, you had quite a lot of questions on your mind. There were quite a few you didn’t dare ask, for example: why did your chest feel so heavy and your skin so cold, until he touched you? What had he done to you? Had he done it on purpose? He had apologized for something; you just didn’t know what.

  He’d sneakily began sleeping in your bed, slipping in behind you when you were deeply asleep, draping a heavy arm over your waist. You’d groggily mumble incoherent protests, feeling his presence, but too tired to try to move him away. He was warm, and he fit very nicely against your back. You let him stay.

  “Are you going to tell me your name?” You pried, following him around the big apartment as he typed away on his phone. He didn’t answer you, so you asked again. This had become a sort of daily ritual. You’d asked him the first day, but all he’d said was: “Did your parents tell you nothing of my kind?” It had you so curious you could burst.

  “Can you tell me something?” You asked, growing bored of not knowing anything about him. He leant against the kitchen counter, his eyes glancing up at you. The stare was a warning to leave it be. You didn’t care, you wanted to know. It wasn’t fair.

  You narrowed your eyes and moved to sit on the counter opposite of him, on the other side of the kitchen, as he went back to texting. Maybe you could use something as leverage? He seemed to like sleeping in your bed. A smile crept over your lips, but you tried your best to conceal it.

  “If you don’t tell me something, I won’t let you sleep in my bed anymore,” you said, trying to keep your voice even. His eyes locked on yours, his stare was dark. Intense. Had you broken through? In the blink of an eye, he was in front of you, his chest pressed against yours. A surprised yelp left your lips.

  His eyes slowly roamed over your face, his lips tipping up in the slightest smirk. You felt your stomach flip at the sight of it. Your breath hitched in your throat as he leaned in even further, his nose nudging against yours. Your mind was going haywire, wondering what his next move was. You waited for him to scare you in some way, fully aware of how much he liked seeing you scared. You thought, though hoped against, that he might use his magic on you.

  What you had not expected, was for his lips to brush against yours. The touch sent shivers down your spine, and you had an urge to lean in a press your lips to his, fully. You didn’t.

  It seemed like he had trouble restraining himself, but he did. He backed off and disappeared right in front of your eyes. You sighed, your hand reaching up to cover your hard beating heart. You couldn’t deny his beauty, and you couldn’t say you didn’t like his sense of humor, and his way of speaking to you – even if he was mysterious. Did you have feelings for him? You had feelings for his looks, that you could agree with yourself on, but for him? You didn’t know him.

  You knew he worked a lot. Exactly what he did, you didn’t know, but he worked a lot. And when he wasn’t working, he was around you, but always had his phone within reach. He’d often be busy working, even when home. He was fancy when it came to, well, everything. He would stare at you until you cleaned up your cereal bowl, even if you weren’t even finished yet. He was very touchy, very ‘hands on’. It was unsettling at first, not being used to it, but when you live with someone, no matter the conditions, you sort of get used to their ways.

  When he was annoyed, which was quite often, though rarely towards you, his eyes glowed red and he unbuttoned a few buttons on his shirt. The day prior, he had actually ripped it apart on “accident”, and you had been caught staring at his chest. He teased you the whole day, though you could never be sure if he was really teasing or serious – his eyes were always intense, and his body language didn’t change between the two.

  He was ripped. Like, really ripped. You’d seen him shirtless several times over the last few days; you’d even seen him naked. He seemed to prefer walking around naked, and though it made you feel profusely uncomfortable, you couldn’t deny it was a pleasure to look at the muscles in his back move as his arms lifted, and the biceps curled and tightened as he held the phone to his ear. The main question on your mind was: why?

  Why had he been interested in ‘buying’ you?

  Why was he being so nice and taking care of you?

  Why did he not want to reveal who he was to you? Other than his nature.

  You weren’t ungrateful for his caregiving, though you had to wonder why he was caring towards you. You had seen how easily irritated he got; how driven he was by his primal instincts. How easy it was to push his buttons, though you tried your hardest to avoid doing that.

  A part of you hoped he was interested beyond the deal he had with your parents. That a man like him, a demon; dark and cruel, more beautiful than any angel you could imagine, was interested in you. Plain old Y/N. You didn’t have a low self esteem per say, though you knew you weren’t the best at most things. Looks wise as well, though you didn’t think you were ugly. You just… reality was that compared to a lot of people on this man’s level, you weren’t even considered pretty.

  You laid awake in your bed that evening, still thinking about the kiss. It was a kiss; you had decided it was. It was your first kiss with him. After your rapidly beating heart had calmed, your senses were overflowed by that same sensation as whenever he left you alone. The air was so cold on your skin, there was an uneasy feeling in your stomach, and you just didn’t feel right.

  The mattress dipped, with no warning, and your body jolted slightly in surprise, though you didn’t move. His hand slid over your waist, and under your hip, taking a hold of you and spinning you around. A gasp left your throat at the sudden movement, and your hands gripped onto his chest for support. You stared up at him in shock.

  He was laying on his side, head propped up on his hand, looking at you with those dark eyes and you were about to say something clever when you noticed his eyes weren’t the same. They were telling you something different.

  His hand slid across your torso, slowly and gently, easing off the pressure in your chest; the horrible cold feeling. How did he have this sort of effect on you? You couldn’t get a grasp of it.

  “What’s happening to me?” You whispered, your voice laced with fear, though your tried to hold it even. He didn’t answer. He leant down and nudged his nose against yours. You felt his breath fan over you face, and you bit your lip. You wanted to be closer. You had such an urge to hold onto him and push your body against his, it almost hurt to hold yourself back. You had to close your eyes, your body tingling with longing.

  “Look at me,” he whispered, and you couldn’t even control your own movements as your eyes snapped open, looking up at him as if he might be the answer you were looking for.

  “Do you trust me?” he mumbled; his voice low. The question caught you of guard. You hadn’t thought about that. Did you trust him? He had kept you safe, for now, at least. He hadn’t acted like the monster he probably could be around you - or, not that much at least. When you pondered over his question, you came to realize that yes, you did trust him.

  “Yes, I think I do,” you whispered, feeling incredibly stupid but also hopeful.

  His eyes shimmered red at your words, though not the angry, fearsome red. They held primal instinct, sure, but not for killing. His fingers tightened their hold on your waist.

  “My name… is Jungkook.”

[shizekarnstein]

N, T, U?? :>>>

<3

N- Name three things you wish you saw more or in your main fandom (or a fandom of choice).

Fruits basket: honestly my experience in this fandom has been... wondeful so far. I'm genuinely surprised by how nice the majority of you all are, and how everything is properly tagged and how when sometimes when I enter the tag yes there are a couple of posts debating certain points from different perspectives but always in a polite fashion! Yeah there are ocassionally bothersome anons but most of the time it's really... nice to be here. So one of my whishes is for that healthy atmosphere to continue. As for especific content mmm maybe for metas about the curse lmao yeah I could write but the more the merrier 😂. Also... it would be nice :) if some people would stop making Yuki and Tohru's relationship :) about kyoru :)

Snk: 1) could you all tag your shit properly. Like a post is an edit about Armin and it's tagged as rivamika or erehisu CHILL PLS. 2) For people to stop bothering others for liking a fictional character and accusing said fans of being idk horrible human beings for being invested in certain characters regardless of what they do in the story. (With that same logic all SW fans are garbage human beings for stanning Darth Vader lmao). 3) For ship wars to fucking stop god you're all so annoying. 4) For fans to take a page out furuba fandom and learn to let people be for not agreeing with your personal takes on the story or characters. Also 5) Imagine a fandom where people idk MADE their own opinions instead of automatically adopting whatever the most popular "meta blogs" decide?? That would be nice :).

T- Do you have any hard and fast headcanons that you will die defending?

AS A MATTER OF FACT OF COURSE I DO.

Fruits basket:

Yuki and Kyo eventually tell Tohru about their side of the Hat story.

Yuki Sohma definetly caused the ruin of numerous cafes and restaurants by attracting hordes of rats every time he went to eat out there. Shigure still finds it hilarious to this day.

Yuki once enrolled in cooking classes bc he wanted to surprise his friends and girlfriend with a homecooked meal. All his classmates were terrified of him and his instructor cried when he finally withdrew. Of course he's stubborn and continued to practice in his apartment. It didn't end well. The firefighters know him by name levels of didn't end well. Finally both Machi and Tohru take pity of his ass and teach him. Under their careful guidance he eventually learns how to make rice and soup.

Tohru Honda daughter of Kyoko Honda defiently knows how to throw a punch and one day when she and Kyo were fighting/flirting without realising she catches him off guard and accidentally gives him a black eye. Tohru spent the evening trying to apologize while pressing a bag of frozen peas to Kyo's face while he was like... in awe bc HIS GIRLFRIEND IS SO STRONG. When Arisa finds out what happened (bc Tohru totally called her) she almost dies laughing her ass off and never let's Kyo forget that happened.

Snk:

Carla Jaeger most certainly taught his son how to cook and he's very good at it. Roping him into helping her cook was one the only ways she could keep an eye on him and be sure he wasnt fighting or getting into trouble all over the town so she commited to her plan. It went better than either of them expected.

Jean had a crush on Eren at one point and no I'm not taking criticisms. One day he was busy glaring at him for walking alongside Mikasa and suddenly he was like... huh Eren's pretty cool actually. I admire him. Right??? And he spent days agonizing wondering if he wanted to be Eren (to be close to Mikasa) or if he LIKED Eren too and his poor bisexual ass suffered so much. Those were the days he was so frustrated with his double crush he would find any excuse to start a fight. Btw Sasha saw right through him and Jean still doesnt know how on earth she noticed.

U- Three favorite characters from three (two) different fandoms, and why they are your favorites.

Fruits basket: You all know Yuki is my sun and stars like I'm not exactly subtle. So instead I'm gonna talk about my three favorite female characters.

1) Machi: she arrived late to the party but when I realised she had become my most favorite female character. She's just... so relatable. A big part of why I connect so strongly with her is bc I saw a lot of my 16 yeas old self in her. When I read chapter 94 I had to put down my phone and took a deep breath bc... Machi was me. It's insane how strongly I related to her.

2)Tohru: my mad respect for Tohru knows no bounds. All alone and trying to be so strong. I love Tohru for how good she is and her story of finally opening the lid and confront his trauma in order to be able to move forward is... excelent. I could spend days taking about Tohru Honda and how wonderful and human and flawed she is. One of the best constructed female protagonists I've even seen.

3) Akito. I love Akito. She captured my interest for the very start and oh how she kept it. I adore Akito bc she does terrible things that can never be undone and at the same time, is the one to finally put the horror to end. Akito stops the circle of violence of the curse and does her damn best to become a better person, even removing herself from the lives of the ex zodicas bc she is very aware of how she wronged them and doesnt want to make them uncomfortable. I adore her struggles with her identity and her internalized mysoginy and everything about her. Also... Akito hot 💅.

Snk:

Eren is the light of my life what more can I say?

Mikasa is wonderful and a fascinating balance between vulnerabilty and strenght. I loved Mikasa as soon as I saw her and she remains one of my most favorite characters of snk.

Jean. Oh man JEAN. The character with the most satisfying character development of the whole story. I already loved him to bits after Trost but then he went and said the very same thing I was screaming about since day 1: it is really ok if in order to defeat these monsters we become worse than them? A KING. I adore Jean and his courage and growth and how he always retains a cool head over his shoulders and hnnng. Jean Kirstein.

[icanbeyourgenie]

“ I am happy Godric found someone like you. ” – Millicent to Rowena

❝ This is such a sweet thing to say considering the state you found me in. ❞

❝ Don’t be hard on yourself. You’re recovering faster than most women would. ❞

Rowena soflty smiled at the girl, who had been nothing less than the greatest support in her life these last weeks. It was implied that Meline was supposed to keep from everyone else that Rowena Ravenclaw was in this village. But Rowena had not been easy to live. She refused to eat, to drink, to move, to go outside. Despite every of Meline’s efforts, she seemed to be determined to let herself die - except she couldn’t. Meline needed some backup, and she seemed to entirely trust Godric’s childhood bestfriend and fiancee. A trust well deserved, since Millicent had not spoke a single word of this secret to anyone. She had do everything she could to help Rowena, and was the very reason that the Ravenclaw was walking outside this moment; slowly, but not needing any assistance. Millicent helped her eat when her whole body screamed not to, took her on walks where Rowena’s body was more of a burden resting on the eldest’s shoulder than anything else, showed kindess beyound mesure. This woman was really a gift, Rowena thought.

Still, during her walks and various talks (well, at first, it was more Millicent who talked and Rowena listened. But at some point, she seemed to regain strenght and the two of them had interesting conversations), never once the name of Godric was spoken. It was implicitly said, yes - but Millicent must have know that Rowena was too weak to afford this talk. Today was different, though.

❝ He never wanted to leave, you know. ❞ Rowena said.  ❝ He was forced to. He... ❞

❝ I know. Of course, at first, I didn’t. We were supposed to get married this day and when he didn’t come... I knew he was a man of honor, even young, but I also knew how impulsive and stubborn he was. I assumed he just realized he didn’t want to do this and left without saying goodbye. I hated him at first. But years went by. I got married, had kids, and news of Godric came back to me. The school you built, the stories that all made you leave your homes... People started considering him a hero. They were all proud to have someone this famous come from their village. I was too. A little bitter, yes; I whished things could have been different. But that bitterness left me now. And I am very proud of what he has become. ❞

❝ How was he when he was younger? ❞

❝ Daredevil. ❞ Rowena laughed. Nothing changed on that point.  ❝ He was very complexe. He was both one of the best man I know, he was brave, loyal. He cared, and he listened, and he was not afraid to show his love. But he was also proud. Too proud. He couldn’t afford to lose. I think he needed to be the best. Maybe for himself? Maybe to show he could take care of everyone? I don’t really know. But it led him to his doom... Or not, since who he became after he left. And who he met... ❞

❝ Do you still love him? ❞ 

❝ ...Is there really any way to fall out of love with Godric Gryffindor? You tell me. ❞

Rowena looked away, a little smile on her lips. No, there was not. And thought it hurt right now, she did not want to give up on this feeling. Just as Millicent, she thought. The eldest had the same smile on her lips. She was the same age as Godric, but easily looked 15 years older now. The effects the fountain of youth had on the founders appeared even clearer to Rowena now.

❝ But life goes on... It did for me. It will for you. Maybe one day you will find a man who... ❞

❝ I will not. ❞ Rowena interrupted, fiercly.  ❝ I’d be damned before I do. There’s nothing much left of me right now. Everything I thought I had, everything I thought I was: wise, intelligent? I realized maybe that was all just a lie I took great pride in and did not want to let go. I’m willing to do so now. There’s no danger, no pain that my witty brain preserved me from. But the love I have for Godric... I will hold on to it for eternity. I know I will love him forever. And I will see him again. That I am sure of. ❞

She suddenly stopped talking, realizing maybe her words were cruel towards the woman who took such good care of her. She did not intend to be cruel, she just spoke her mind. But Millicent’s warm smile made her guilt go away.

❝ I will pray for you to find him again. But right now, you still need to rest. You’re not completely healed yet. Besides, I have a lot of special soup receipes I want you to taste before you leave us. ❞

[tell-mi]

Neigbor

Being the flatmate of the successful attorney and playboy Chris Evans isn't always easy. But as his ex girlfriend turnes out to be the new girlfriend of your flatmate Marc, also your life was about to tipsy turn upside down.

Warnings: mentions of smut, fluff, mention of sex, alcohol, language

Two weeks! Since two weeks you had to surrender in peace with your flatmates. you didn't hate them. Well, at least not Marc, he was a wonderful soul. He was that kind person, everyone loves to hangout with. One, your mum would be proud of if you brought him home. But his best friend Chris was all opposite to him. He was a playboy like it is described in the books. Bringing home a new girl at least two times a week. He sure was good looking, yes, he was well trained and hae the most beautiful eyes you would have sworn you have ever seen. But character is nothing, what you would have ever paired with his name. At least he always picked you up at the university where he helped out during the law courses and you studied at. But you have to admit that the car ride was the only reference points you two had.

You haven't always been a flatmate of those two dorkheads. You moved to New York in the flat next opposite to the guys, to your bigger sister, Lana. Lana just broke up with her fiance and felt alone. And you needed some space nearer to the university, so you agreed her constantly begging for you to move in. Long story short, one day Luke knocked at you door and begged Lana to take him back, she agreed and he moved back in. The wonderful overly romantic mood was going on your nerves very soon. And as you cursed a little bit too loud in the buildings floor again you've got offered the flat from the guys.

***

Three weeks ago:

"God damnit would you please fuck in your room and not moan all over the house!!?" You slammed the door of your flat, standing in the hall ready to go to the flower shop. You couldn't sleep the whole night due to your sister and her boyfriends constantly love makeing. Tired, with a huge coffee in your hand, which you almost tossed down in fright as Chris headed upstairs. "I hope you didn't meant me and...Jenna! No Jenny?..Joana?.. whatever!" he grinned mischievous towards you. Annoyed you rolled your eyes at him. "It's not only you, idiot, which keeps is all up at night with your sex noises. Lana and Luke are constantly over each other since they're back together." "They are?" he must have just been returned from a run since he now started to stretch infront of you. You caught yourself staring a little bit to long at his muscles which initiate under his clothes. Damn, has he a nice butt. "Luke just moved in again" you tried to ignore his butt. "AHH.. that's why he didn't come back to sleep in his room for even one night the last five days!" he turned to you. "Like what you see?" With a childish grin he asked. You were totally pulled out of your thoughts. The not staring didn't worked out the right way. "Shut up dickhead, you were the one who stretched his ass towards me. A women can also have a quick look" you tried to explain yourself and head down stairs.

***

It was a long shift at the flower shop and you had been so happy to be close to call it a day as Marc entered the flower shop in the last minute.

"Don't tell me you forgot your mum's birthday or something?" you raised an eyebrow at him "A last minute flower call is never a good sign.. besides why are you looking so fancy?" "Hey you, nice to see ya too." you rolled your eyes at Marcs constantly kindness. "No...Hey, I just wanted to tell you something, the boys and I discussed about. And... actually I have a date in a few minutes and thought a nice flower might be a good way to leave a good impression"

"Good point, gentleman. I will prep a pink rose if that's okay?" "Sounds great." he spoke a bit louder now since you strayed somewhere in the background to pack his flower. "By the way, Chris told me that your housing situation is a bit difficult lately." still working on the green for the flower you stretched your head to look at Marc "Pah, I whish it would be difficult. It's freaking nerve wrecking!" "Yeah, I know how annoying it can be...Anyway, so we talked to Luke and offered him to swap his room with yours. Only if you agree, for sure."

"Excuse me?" you asked yourself if you overheard anything or if Marc really offered you to swap rooms.

"Yeah, well you know. We know how exhausting Luke and Lana could be when they are totally over each others. We experienced I ourselves. So, Chris had the idea to ask Luke and he is totally fine with it. If you agree, you can start to move in directly tomorrow. I am off for work but Chris already offered to help with all the furniture and stuff."

Not even thinking about the offer for one minute you agreed. "Sounds like a plan!" you smiled to Marc and handed him the beautiful pink rose.

***

The next day you already sat in your new flats living room. All parcels had been packed and half already unpacked. Thank god for the short distance it didn't took to long. To your surprise Chris really helped you with the carrying of the 'heavy stuff' "You really don't believe I would have handled it on my own, do you?" "Mary!" he chuckled out "look at you! You are..so tiny." he nearly whined the 'tiny' which let you only roll your eyes at him "There's no way you could have lifted your fully packed wardrobe alone." "I'm not tiny, I'm greatness packed compact!" You glared him a serious look while you gestured your body shape with your arms. Chris let out a laugh which filled his whole body. He threw away his upper bod and smacked himself on the chest. You don't really knew what was THaT funny, but his heartwarming laugh made yourself smile in his direction. "By the way, don't call me Mary. For you I'm still Marianne" "As long as I have to help you with your movement, you are Mary" he wrapped his huge arm around your shoulder,pulling you in to a sidehug. You can't help but roll your eyes about his cockyness but somehow you enjoyed the way, you two might be heading to.

***

It was the end of summer and the sun set down a bit earlier by now. As it turned to become dark you've finally unpacked the last stuff into your cabinets. Exhausted you popped down and let yourself rest on your bed. The door of your room still a bit open. "Beer?" You heard Chris scream across the living room towards you. Does he really tries to be nice to you? You two didn't ever had many contact points the last half year since you lived in New York. The only talk you've had was about his one-night-stands whenever you saw them leave his flat like a proud macho. You, for your side always ended it and let him know so. He was a jerk and an asshole towards ladies. Only seeing them as bedtoys. You can't really believe Lana the story about Chris ex girlfriend. He must have been totally in love with her and was totally heartbroken after she split because of someone new. Getting rid of your thoughts quickly, you answered "Uhm, yeah. Why not!"

He sat on the couch infront of the TV and raised his hand with a beer. You grabbed the bottle and cheered him. "Pats?" you mimicked to the TV and let yourself fall to the couch next to him. Surprised he looked over to you. "You watch football? Really?" "Ya, sometimes. But i'm more of a soccer girl." "I really underestimated you, Stacey!" Chris smiled towards you with a smile that could have turned you belly upside down if you weren't sober right now. "What does that mean, Evans? Didn't you think I am cool enough for you?" Chris chuckled, almost spilling his beer. "You know, you just don't look like a football fan." "Uh huh, how do I look then?" Does this conversation start to get playfull? You don't know what even couraged you to. Chris opened his mouth a few times just as if he wanted to start to talk but took a sip after the fourth time. "You know, you look more like a really serious young women. A good looking one but..." "Nah, I am the opposite of serious!" You raised from the couch to grab some more beer. "I don't know. Never experienced it!" Chris turned his head back to you with kind of a smirk on his face. On his extraordinary beautiful face. What was wrong with you? It's just the dork flatmate!! "Thank you, and thank you for your help. Really appreciate it. I think I really underestimated you too, Chris!" You head back to the couch, handing him his beer.

***

Soon,after a few more beer you fell asleep in total exhaustion on the couch. As your body slid deeper into the couch, your head dropped on Chris shoulder. The sweet humming of you totally pulled him out of watching the game. He was used to the touch women, used to beautiful women. But your head on his shoulder, you body touching his body and filled his left side with a comfortable warmth made him breath faster than he wanted to. He didn't want to wake you up so he tried to only shift a little bit to let you drop down into an comfortable posture. You now totally cuddled up against his chest while his arm was holding your side. You looked sweet and innocent but he'll he knew you was a brave women with a lot of self esteem. Your strawberry blonde curly shoulder long hair nearly fallen into your face. He couldn't help but tug it away behind your ears. He wondered what was it, that made him ignore a Pats game and stare at you until the sound of the keys turning made him wake up of his thoughts.

***

Marc stared at you and Chris slightly irritated. "Dude, you already laid out new flatmate?" he whispered towards Chris. "Shhh, she just fell asleep on the couch while we watched the game. I didn't even touched her once. So shut up!" In disbelief Marc raised his eyebrow. "Yeah, this would be the first time you didn't touch a hot girl who's lying on your lap. Remember our flatmate code, bro. Leave your fingers off of her."

You woke up by the two guys talking to each other and surprisingly they talked about you. You decided to let your eyes shut to hear whats it about. "You know I can listen to you, do ya?" You sit up back again straight. Glaring Chris an excusing face. "Sorry!" you padded his shoulder "No, it's ok" she almost whispered while waving your excuse off. "Well Marc, thanks for the compliment. Hot, Huh? What's the flatmate code exactly about?" you turned your head between Marc and Chris. "Oh, it's nothing..." Chris answered quickly, interrupted by Marc. "Rule number one. Which is the only rule to be honest. Bring home whoever you want and fuck whoever you want but don't fuck one of your flatmates."

***

The first night in your new flat gifted you with great sleep and your couldn't be happier about it. Still in your Victoria's Secret PJ with a tiny short, your hair up in a messy bun you walked into the kitchen where Chris was already sitting witch cornflakes Infront of him. "Morning!" you stretched you muscles again while groaning into your hand. Your top slid up a bit and let free a small spot of your waist. You caught Chris not only staring at your but but also staring at your skin now. "Like what you see?" He almost choked on his cornflakes which made you laugh out. Slipping into your chair at the table while preparing your sandwich, you've got interrupted by a heavy knocking on your flat door. Chris stood up to open it "Linda?" "Oh Hi Chris, uhm, I thought you've already left for work. Uhm!" "Well, i did Not!" he raised his arms as much as he raised his voice. "Uhm, I just wanted to leave that for Marc. He just forgot it at the bar yesterday, where I saw him." That utterly hot blond chic handed him something what looked like Marc's phone. You could swear she was a model or something. "oh, I didn't knew he saw you" You observed the scene from your dining table. "Yeah, he was on a date there." That unbelievably pretty blonde women smiled at Chris. "Well, I will go now." Just as she turned around Chris asked "How are you doing Linda?" "Fine I am fine. Look, I am in a hurry. See you!"

Just as she left, Chris closed the door and let himself lean against it. He let out a loud sigh while running his hands through his face. "Okay, what was that telenovela about?" you asked him in disbelief. "That, that was my ex." You could barely hear his answer but you can see that something in his behaviour changed. He was truly upset. And for the first time knowing him, you felt something different than annoyance towards Chris.

You felt really sorry for him.

[fandom-necromancer]

873. We’re stuck in here.

This was prompted by an amazing anon! I hope you enjoy it, I had fun writing it! Also both ideas were hilarious, so the other story will be uploaded too!

Fandom: Detroit become human | Ship: Reed900

‘Why can’t we have luck for once in our lifetime?’, Gavin groaned as they stomped through the snow. Nines offer to walk in front of him as he wouldn’t tire whilst breaching a way for his human had been promptly ignored by the man’s stubborn need for control. ‘Maybe because you decide to make it look like misfortune is chasing us?’, Nines chuckled, concentrating on wading through the knee deep snow. ‘Oh please, don’t start with your optimism now! Where is the good in our car breaking down, us pushing it through the whole country to find a parking lot in this rural as shit area? Where is the good in us ploughing through the snow to find some car repair before it closes for the day?’ ‘I get to enjoy a nice view on your behind while following you?’, Nines offered to lighten the Detectives spirits. ‘You- what?’ Gavin laughed. Nines had successfully taken him by surprise. ‘Okay, maybe you have some benefits. But what about me?’ ‘You were the one to refuse me walking in front’, Nines shrugged. ‘Also… experience?’ ‘Yeah, phck you too, Nines.’ ‘A bit cold for that, wouldn’t you think?’ ‘Okay, could you stop?’, Gavin called out, embarrassed although no one would be crazy enough to be outside in this weather to hear them. ‘Come on, let’s just hope we find some place fast.’

Nines continued to follow Gavin in silence, keeping a close eye on the man’s body temperature and heart rate. Although he kept a positive attitude towards all things in life, that excluded everything that was about his human’s health and prolonged lifespan. Considering this he was pretty pessimistic, just to make sure Gavin was absolutely safe and out of harm’s way. It was long dark as they arrived at the next town and Nines knew since he had access to an android network, that every repair centre was already closed. But he didn’t tell this his human knowing it would just worsen his mood even more than the snow and coldness already did. He was shivering and in Nines’ evaluation his human had long surpassed their car in importance. ‘Hey, Gavin, it is already late. I think we should look for a place to stay the night.’ ‘Oh come on. We could drive through the night and I won’t hesitate to ring out whoever is the mechanic in this damn town. We could wave our badge around and make them help us.’ Nines sighed. ‘Or we could just find a place to spend the night and continue with our mighty quest tomorrow, like normal people.’ ‘Yeah, I guess that would work, too’, Gavin sighed in defeat.

The wandered through the little town that would have seemed deserted if it weren’t for the lights in some windows. Nines took the lead, having located the nearest hotel that might have some rooms left. As they walked up to it it looked cosy, the kind of private run hotel that only appeared in movies and was never found in real life. They entered and were greeted cheerfully by a young woman whose expression quickly changed as she saw their dishevelled looks. ‘Good evening’, Nines nodded towards her. ‘Our car broke down just out of town, do you have a vacant room for the night?’ ‘Err… yes. One moment.’ The woman quickly hit her very obvious first impression to type away at a keyboard. Nines waited and quickly interfaced with their device to pay their stay. ‘Have a nice stay!’, the receptionist smiled at them while handing Nines their keys. Both quickly went upstairs to find their room, Gavin at least not shivering anymore.

‘Okay, Nines, this was a good idea’, Gavin sighed as he immediately stripped off his jacket and wet pants. ‘We are already in this mess, may as well make the best of it.’ Nines inspected their room, also hanging up his wet clothes to dry. ‘Well, the bathroom has a tub.’ ‘Really?’, suddenly Gavin’s spirits were wide awake again. ‘Oh, that would be just right, I’m freezing.’ ‘Okay. Then take a bath. Tomorrow we’ll find the spares we need for the car and be on our way.’ ‘Erm… Nines? How about you join me?’, Gavin suggested. ‘I don’t think we would both fit…’ ‘Oh come on, we’ll fit just fine. I’m not sleeping next to an ice cube; you have to get warm too.’

Nines sighed. It wasn’t really difficult for him to follow Gavin’s whish as he would take every given opportunity to be close to him. The man let in the water and entered first, Nines following in after him. They settled opposite to each other at first, Gavin groaning at the heat warming him up and chasing away the lingering cold in his bones. Nines enjoyed it too, even though the only real benefit to him was his constant HUD on Gavin’s vitals disappearing as he knew him comfortable and out of the cold. He too hummed contently and closed his eyes, thus missing Gavin’s sudden mischievous grin. His movement was announced by the sound of water splashing, although Nines had thought the man to wash himself.

Instead Gavin was suddenly propped up over him, kissing him. Surprised by the sudden weight on his chest, Nines sunk in more, resulting in both of them falling to their sides and splashing water throughout the bathroom. Gavin equally coughed at some spray water and laughed, but soon Nines realised their troublesome situation. ‘Gavin’, he began, but the human was still chuckling away, kissing him. ‘Gavin, would you stop for a moment?’ ‘Why?’ ‘Because I think we’re stuck in here.’ ‘What?’ Nines tried to move or stand up but only got so far before colliding with Gavin’s hipbone. ‘Ouch, what are you doing?’ ‘Gavin, we are stuck here. Because you had to pull that stupid stunt!’

‘Ah, well. Just proves how much of an idiot we both are’, Gavin chuckled, hugging Nines. ‘We? You!’ ‘Oh, come on. We’re in this together.’ ‘I know! And we won’t get out!’ ‘Relax. Where is your optimism now?’, Gavin complained smiling. ‘We are trapped in a bathtub naked and have yet to figure out how to get free in a way that doesn’t involve some outer help, because then we are officially those weirdos too. People will talk Gavin, just wait until that story hits the precinct! So please tell me what the good is in this!’ ‘You are not just stuck in a bathtub, babe’, His human just smirked. ‘You are stuck in a bathtub with me!’

[islandofimagines-blog]

Damn I whish you were here

Everyone remember thst night clearly , the night were you got shot by latrelle and didnt make it , when Cesar told you he loved you for the first time , now Cesar could only think about how he never got to give you the last kiss and make things official beetween you two , it was killing him inside that he was never going to see you smile again or laugh like he loved so much , how everytime he passed by your house he would saw your parents crying in your room in your bed when the window was open , he missed you more that he ever thought he would and he couldnt handle that pain it was too much for him to bare and the crew knew it like damn even Oscar knew it but Cesar didnt let nobody come close to him or seeing him crying.

Cesar was walking alone to school a routine that seemed normal to him now with his eadphones in his ears and head bow down feeling numb to the pain he was feeling that day , in the end of the street he saw his friends and immediatly the crew ran to him being goofys to make him smile but Ruby looked at him and told all of them to stop and just gave a hug to Cesar tight has he could and walked by his side quiet respecting the state of spirit of his best friend.

¨you know man , you could take some time off from school and have some time for yourself and visit y/n in her grave or talk with her parents, it would be good bor you to have some disclosure about those feelings , I know you loved her and trust me she loved you too but she wont come back and she would like for all of us to stay here and make the best of our lifes and try to be happy, she wouldnt like to see you like that Cesar ,I dont like to see you like that , neither of us does.” Ruby spoke softly and with a lot of pain his voice trying to contain the tears that started to form in his eyes , he looked at his friend in a glance and saw Cesar face , he was not the same anymore and Ruby knew that his friend blamed himself for the death of the girl he loved since he didnt kill Latrelle like his brother order him to do and on top of that he was kicked out of the Santos , so Cesar didnt have much to look forward to.

“ stop ok man!” Cesar stopped on his tracks and looked at all of his friends with now an angry look on his face. “ stop making me feel like I am the victim when you know i fucked everything up! If i was man enough to kill Latrelle y/n would still be alive , i could walk with her today hand in hand and smiling with her , we could do all that we planned , we could be a whole crew again , so stop making me feel like I didnt have any fault in this because I do! I was the one who sentenced her to her death and everybody knows ,  she was my girl so what the hell was I expecting ?! you guys have no idea what it is to go to sleep and the only thing i have from her is voice mails , pictures , memories , I cant even look at her parents because I know that they hate me for what I am or was , you guys have no idea of what it is to feel empty again , damn Ruby you got shot and look at you , you are not the same anymore so I even messed up my best friend head with my issues . I just ... damn i wish you were y/n.. I miss her so much man, she was my soulmate i knew it , she could handle my life both side of it , she always had something positive to say about whatever it was , even Oscar took a like on her and now I am in the street living because not even my brother wants me to live in his house anymore , Ruby I want her back so bad man , I cant live like this , i cant it hurts to much..” 

Cesar broke down in tears infront of his friends for the first time and all of them came to give a big hug letting him cry all his pain and anger knowing for how long he was holding on those emotions inside. Monse back it up a little and wiped her tears fast before going to her backpack and take the letter that y/n wrote for Cesar confession her love for him and with that she made a video to suprise Cesar on his birthday . 

“hey i think its time for you to see this, she made this video so everytime you wanted her close to you no matter where you two were she was always going to be by your side and this letter is for you to see for yourself what she feels, it doesnt matter if she is not here physically , she is here in our hearts and arounds us , she was part of us and always will be and has long we have these little things to hold on to her she will never leave us or be gone forever.¨ 

Monse gave Cesar a small smile and played the video on her phone showing all of them laughing and playing around , Cesar couldnt hold the little smile forming on his lips even though his heart was tight and tears were streaming slowly down his face. Y/n was now on the room with Monse and she didnt knew that she was being recorded when she was talking about Cesar and he smirked at her blushing when mentioning him.

“oh god Monse he is so sweet and so cute, I mean that boy is more than cute but i dont want to ruin our friendship with confessing my feelings , I fell in love with him for his smile , for his eyes the way they sparkle when he is laughing , oh god that laugh makes me feel like a little girl on christmas time , Oscar knows I love him and he laughed even though he said we would make a cute couple but what can i do? i dont want things to go awkward beetween the group. Everytime that I am with him time stops and i dont want ever to leave, if I could i would sleep in his arms for the rest of my life because to be honest i have never felt so safe with someone like i feel with him, even though he has the life he has in the gang I dont care, everyone has a past and has some kind of legacy to make or continue and I believe he just wants to fit in with his brother , I love him so much Monse and if you knew how my heart beats when I see him you would think this is from a movie or something , I am sorry im just rambling and being annoying , sorry Monse”

Cesar broke down once again and hold the letter to his lips kissing it tears never stop flowing and everyone was crying at the same time , they all loved her for her kindness, she was the neutral one of the group , always ready to help everyone without wanting nothing in return but seeing the others happy and that is what Cesar loved the most about her , he looked at Monse and nodded to her in a way to say thank you and she looked at him the same way crying , Jamal sniffed and looked behind to see Oscar in his yard looking at his little brother with this heart broken , Oscar started to walk over and Jamal gave a small scream hidhing behind Ruby like he was his savior . 

“ We need to talk lil’ spooky” Oscar tried to keep his posture and cesar looked at him with his eyes red and puffy from crying and Oscar couldnt see his brother like that , he broke his posture and gave a hug to his brother making him know he was there to support him.

“ Im so sorry for what happened to you but I can promise you something , we are going to fix this and give you and y/n the peace you guys deserve. She was a nice girl actually i liked her , she had this aura about her that made her easy to talk to , so if you still want we are going to end with the prophets for good and honor her memory hermanito. Por ti y por tu amor que tienes a ella , sabis bien lo que tienes que hacer por iso para de llorar , Im here for you , you didnt lost everything.¨ 

Oscar whispered in his brother ear and like that Cesar still had some hope for him, he didnt lose everyone he loved and damn right he was going to finish with the prophets , he was going to make them pay for what they did to his princess and no matter what from now on Cesar was going to make whatever it takes to rebuilt her honor and memory so it can prevale forever like he wanted.

(if you want to get tagged on the next imagines and future fanfic let me know ,hope you enjoy this first imagine , love you )

[imagine-a-fangirl]

SPOILER ALERT! for infinity war under the cut. Don’t read it if you haven’t seen it :) 

my-current-fandom-is requested: If you saw Infinity War could you write one after the end where Tony needs to know the reader made it through the whole battle and is still alive? It can be a bit angsty but please finish it with fluff!

A/N: I just couldn’t neglect you for another full week :), enjoy

They failed, after all those times saving the world. They failed when the world was needed them the most. He had seen the boy who felt like his son disintegrate before his own eyes. He couldn’t get the pleading of the boy out of his head, if hadn’t dragged the boy in their fight in the first place he would have been safe. Now he had to tell May what happened, that he was responsible of the death of her nephew.. The longer he was sunken in his thoughts, the more he oversaw the consequences of what had just happened. Half of the universe had been wiped out, that meant that half of the people he knew would be gone. He didn’t know if Steve was still alive, he didn’t know if Rhodey and Happy were still alive, but even worse he realized that he had no idea if you were still alive. A new wave of panic overthrew him, but instead of wallow in self-pity he decided to  go over to action, he needed to know if you were okay.

Tony got up from the ground, looked around for a way out when he spotted the ship the blue alien had gotten in to Titan “You know how to fly this thing, right? You’re going to bring me back to earth.” He ordered the blue alien “I do, but I can’t fly you back to earth.” “Oh yes you can, you’re going to help me get back to earth, if you don’t I assure you, you whished you had gotten killed by Thanos. I will let you suffer in every way I know how. So you are going to help me get back to earth right now.” Tony snapped at her. “Listen you moron. The ship is wrecked by Thanos, there is no way that’s getting us anywhere.” “There is nothing that is broken that can’t be fixed.” Tony used everything he could to fix the ship, parts of his suit, parts of the crashed ship he gotten with and he ordered the alien around. Tony had no idea how much time he had spend working on the thing but he managed to fix it. “Not bad for a human.” The blue alien told him “Tony, the name is Tony.” He held out his hand, they would be stuck together for at least a couple hours. Introducing himself was the least he could do. “Nebula.” She introduced herself “Shall we then, I expect you want to back to your friends.” “Yes let’s get off this damn planet.” The two of them climbed on board. Nebula did what she had to do and they were able to take off. It wasn’t his finest work, and the ship was still damaged but it managed and that was all what mattered. He didn’t care how he would get back, as long as he could hold you in his arms again.

While Nebula flew them back to earth, Tony tried to fix his communication system with F.R.I.D.A.Y. If you were still alive he needed the AL to tell him where you were. “How long before we’re at earth?” Tony asked after he was done. “A couple hours.” Nebula answered “Do I need to take over? Maybe you should get some rest?” Tony suggested “No.” Tony tried to talk her, just about meaningless things. But it became clear that she didn’t want to talk and he was okay with that. Tony was sunken into his thoughts, thinking of what might have happened to his friends. Who would still be there, what he would tell May. He thought about everything except what might have happened to you. He had dozed of a bit when the hit from the atmosphere woke him up immediately. As soon as they crossed through the atmosphere F.R.I.D.A.Y called through the system “welcome back Mr. Stark.” “Friday, give me the last known location of Y/N and the other avengers.”  Tony ordered F.R.I.D.A.Y showed him the last known coordinates and told him they were last seen in Wakanda. Nebula filled them in her system. Tony had heard stories about Wakanda, seen pictures, but the fight with Thanos had left it’s marks. He was able to tell where fight had been going on, bodies that had yet to be recovered. Ships he wasn’t able to identify and what more. Nebula landed the ship at the side of the city, within seconds guards where everywhere, yelling for them to come out. Tony opened the ship, held his hands where they would able to see them and slowly walked out of the ship “My name is Tony Stark, I came to look for the avengers.” “Tony?” A deep familiar voiced called as he walked from between the armed warriors. “Rogers!” He was relieved by the sight of his old friend and quickly closed the space between them to hug him “I’m so glad to see you alive.” Tony sighed “Likewise Tony, we have lost a lot of friends.” Steve could barely hide the hurt in his voice. Tony could tell things were wrong. He was almost afraid to ask but he did it anyway “Sam and Bucky?” Steve just shook his head, looking down at the ground. “I’m so sorry Steve.” “I’ll take you to the others, they will be glad to see that you’re still alive.” Steve quickly got his act back together “Who is your friend?” Steve nodded to Nebula “This nebula, she is from space. We were fighting on titan… we were so close from getting gauntlet of but we failed.” “We did our best Tony.” Steve placed his hand on his shoulder “We all did.” They got on one of the hovercrafts as Tony told Steve what happened on Titan. “The kid.. Peter.. he felt what was happening to  him.. I don’t know if I can ever forgive myself for that.” “I’m sorry Tony, I really am.” Steve told him about what had happened to them and was only half way when they got to the palace. “Come, they probably can’t wait to see you.” Tony followed him but his steps felt heavier than he had ever felt. Steve hadn’t told him who were alive yet and that only scared him more. But when the walked inside the palace and he heard the low voice of his best friend he couldn’t help but smile “Rhodes!” Tears of relieve filled his eyes when he hugged his friend “You are never allowed to go on any rides without me. Don’t care if it’s a spaceship or whatever.” Rhodey laughed but he didn’t let go of his friend. “I didn’t really plan to.” Tony sighted before letting go When he saw that Bruce, Nat and Thor were also still alive Tony almost forgot what he had been so anxious about. That was until he heard you sweet voice calling his name. “Tony?” He looked up, he saw you standing on the top of the stairs. Before he had the chance to run to you, you were already running down. You almost tripped of the last steps making you fall into his arms. “I thought I lost you.” You were barely able to say through your tears “You’re not getting rid of me that easily.” Tony tried to joke, he couldn’t believe that he held you in his arms again. “I love you so much Y/N.” he whispered

[moonraccoon-exe]

COON! You Play Horizon now? First DA:I and now Horizon? Ugh, all those awesome Gaming choices. I sadly didn’t play the game but I watched a playthrough and it is soooo stunning. I am so weak for games with such beautiful environments (one of the aspects why I love The Witcher). And YES for the badass female protagonist. Aloy is awesome isn’t she? I am glad that you are having fun after the initial problems. And i hope you‘ll be having a blast through the rest of the game. :3 -Peridot

PERIDOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT!!!!!!!!!!!!! ( ´ ▽ ` )

*SMOOCHIE*

HEWWO PERIDOT AKSJFKLAGDJGALKGDJ ZOMG HELLO I’M SO HAPPY TO SEE YOU AROUND AGAIN!!!

And hell yeah, I’m playing Horizong and I’m SO OBSESSED, YOU HAVE NO IDEA KLAJSKLGJFH. I’ve had a few days that I’ve stayed up past 1 am, which is like unusual in me because I love sleeping, just to keep playing. I haven’t gotten to play daily because my bro almost daily hogs the TV lmao, but when I do, dammit, it’s so difficult to take a pause! THIS ISN’T HEALTHY AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH

And hell yeah it would be an awesome gaming choice. You’re like me and I’m like you just in different countries. The world was like “Yes, I will just copy paste this creature because Ive run out of ideas and just drop one here and the other across the ocean lmao what are the chances they’ll find each other” but the joke’s on the world because now we’re buddies lol

Honestly, the stuff you like is like. A mirror or like I ghostwrite what you tell me HOW DO YOU DO THAT. Or is it me who is a mirror and ghostwriting? HURRR e3e

But I digress ahahah

It’s okay to have only watched a playthrough! There’s people that do just that and that’s okay. Everybody experiences games in their own way, and not just as in their subjective perceptions of it, but also how they got into it in the first place! I’ve known people into the XV fandom that don’t even have a console, but that doesn’t make their experience any less fantastic!! Same for you, it’s okay to not have played it.

However, I do suggest it if you ever get the chance! I’m a little sad that I got it as second hand because I think “I know it’s just some miserable pennies to them but how I wish I could have helped with the popularity rating in the developers’ offices!”, that’s how damn good and incredible it is. Well designed, every single thing is where it needs to be, everything is so thoroughly thought through (oh my god so many tho’s), it’s absolutely gorgoeous. but I think you don’t need me to say that, you’ve watched the whole thing already and I’m just starting the climax!

Lemme add a keep reading right here, aye buddy? :3

So yep, big recommendation over here!!

I’m SO SO SO SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO VERY WEAK FOR GAMES WITH BEAUTIFUL VIEWS AND ENVIRONMENTS TOO OH MY GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAWDAKL SFJ DLKHAJ DLIFJA EGKLDJ BAKLDG

*EXPLODES*

SEE, PERIDOT? SEE? WE’RE LITERALLY THE SAME THING JUST SPEAKING DIFFERENT LANGUAGES, HOW DID WE STUMBLE UPON EACCH OTHER, this is like that one movie Parent Trap, and we’re the twins, except we’re not twins and you have your twin alskdjgk lmao why am i digressing so much today .3. 

But really, I really really really love games with big and beautiful maps. It’s one of the reasons it saddens and frustrated me so much to be unable to play Breath of the Wild, I’ve heard the setting there is absolutely mesmerizing and stunning!!! But yes. Games with big beautiful maps and environments are the absolute BEST, they’re my jam, I could buy a game with the most horrible of plots just for the map and I’d LOVE it.

And the environment here in Horizon? Fuknin.g Spectalcular! OH MY GAWD IT’S SO GODDAMN BEAUTIFUL AND SOOOOOOOOOOOO STUNNING, I CAN’T GET TIRED OF IT IT’S ABSOLUTELY FANTASTIC AND GORGEOUS AND SO BREATHTAKING.

There’s lots of snowy mountains and paths, too, which makes me so happy and comfy because I LOVE SNOWY ENVIRONMENTS. And I love climbing to high places to look around (you can tell I love finding Observatories aksldjlkg). I’m in love with ALL THE RIVERS HAVE YOU SEEN HOW MANY RIVERS HORIZON HAS? MANY. MUCH. VERY. LOTS. IT’S SO MUCH WATER I LOVE WATER BODIES AND SPECIALLY LAKES AND RIVERS AAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!

And all the nature all the plants and flowers and trees gawds fuck me I fangasm, such a BEAUTIFUL scenario!

HOLY HOH, THE WITCHER HAS A BEAUTIFUL ENVIRONMENT TOO HUH??? .3. I mean it doesn’t surprise me, it IS a fantasy plot and an RPG so naturally it has to have a BEAUTIFUL open world and wide map full of nature and gorgeous sights. GAWDS AKJFDG IKLJOLDKJFA GKLDJ KLJAD LK *GRABBY HANDS*

HELL YEAH ALOY IS SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO AWESOMEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

FREAKING...SUPERB FUNKY LITTLE CREATURE, MOST FANTASTIC AND SKILLED AND STRONGEST BADASS BEING, THAT WONDERFUL AND AMAZING OH MY GAWD OH MY GAWD I FANGASM AGAIN MY LOVE FOR ALOY IS IMMEASURABLY INSANE AND HUGE GAWDS DAMN ME I LOVE HER SO MUCH ALKSFJ KHD JHKLGF

Gods, she’s such a gorgeous example of a badass strong female lead role. She’s strong and has her own personality and determined and gawds damn me oh my god I melt I LOVE HER SO MUCH

She as a child was adorable and I was like oooh okay I like this, and then in that montage where she’s training, and you see her give a roll when she’s a kid and when she lands she’s an adult? OH FUCK ME TAHT’S WHAT I WAS ARROWED OH MY GOD, OH MY GOD SHE’S SO B ADASS AND SO STRONG AND SO SKILLED AND OH MY GOD IT KILLED ME

I at first was afraid that I wasn’t going to do well with this game, because I’m not very good with technology stuff, and that still counts for in game things. Like, give me a sword and an ancient spell book, I catch my grip. But give me a...the triangle artifact she finds in the beginning? Not sure what it’s called in english. That thing that scans and analyzes, and codes, and metal things and I’m...hngngh...l os t. I can barely understand a smartphone, you can’t give me futuristic gadgets and expect me to do well XD

But I’m doing strangely phenomenal!! I caught my grip really fast and I’m doing fantastic with everything. Agaklsjggadk, the more I type, the more I want to leave to go game, ahaha!! Aaaahhhhhhh, but yes, I was a bit insecure at first but gods damn me am I obsessed now alksjdf dglkdj

I do am having a blast!! I’m doing as usual and going for all available sidequests before progressing in the story, so I’ve been walking around for a while before reaching the Carja place and meeting the sun king and stuff. Current mission of main story is cleaning 1 more corrupted area. EASY PEASY. 

I’m surprisingly having more troubles with sidequests than main story actually ahahaha!! Like, “clean this corrupted area” yeah sure there you go. Sidequest, kill this one lonely machine that popped up from nowhere. Sure pal I’m- DEAD? WHAT DO YOU MEAN DEAD!?!? OH MY GO- OH MY GOD I DIED AGAIN STOP- HOW DO I HIT IT- NO- NO I’M DEAD AGAIN, OH MY GOD STOP!!!!!!!! NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!

Main story be like “go clean this corrupted area level 16″ pfff easy peasy. Sidequest be like “explode this zone level 8″ yeah okay OH MY GOD I’M DEAD, WHY, OH MY GOD THAT MACHINE IS GIGANORMOUS WHY IS LEVEL 16 FULL OF SMALL ONES AND THIS ONE HUGE IS- OH MY GOD STOP!!!!!!!!!!

Ahahahah but I’ve managed to clear sidequests! Some after many attempts, but cleared them. Gods is the explosive trap a miracle .3.

But anyways, that’s that dear Peridot!!! Thank you for whishing for me to enjoy the rest of the game, I’m SO sure I’ll have the blast of my life with everything yet left to do!!

I’m queueing this for an hour that suits you better, dear friend. Hopefully you’ll see this in your morning :)

Anyways!! Dear Peridot, that’s that about Horizon!! As always, it’s such a joy getting to talk with you. Thank you for dropping by, you superb muffin

Talk to you later, buddy!! Hugs for you!!

[monasatlantis]

Persona 5 Royal Final Review

After 108 hours of gameplay I finally finished Persona 5 Royal. (P5R from now on.) And it is time for my game-review. Usually, if I replay a game, I don’t review it a second time. But I think the Royal version deserves its own review.

Of course, spoiler for P5R are under the cut!

I don’t want to drag that review too long, but there are certain things that need to be said and that is what I am going to do.

First of all, my overall feeling for the game was, that I enjoyed playing it a lot more then the original P5. The things that were changed or added be it plotwise or in the battle- and gamesystem seemed small in the beginning but overall made for a better game experience and made the game more enjoyable and fun.

Of course, knowing almost all of the characters and the overall plot helped a lot to find yourself right at home relatively fast.

I really have to give a huge praise for the prologue to Atlus once more. Because damn do they know what they are doing. The one from the original was already perfect. I mean, I’ve seen my fair share of Prologues in JRPGs and also my fair share of the “This is were you are, now work your butt off to actually reach this point in the game” - ones. But none has ever be as good as the one from Persona 5. So here I was, starting P5R expecting to see the same great prologue again and got slightly panicked the moment I realized something was different. When Violet showed up, I feared it would ruin the amazingness of the original Start of the game by giving to much focus on her. Instead, the scene made the start even better. Because... at this point, we know nothing more about her then that she is the new female character from P5R and she just swoops in, saves Joker and reminds him of a promise we know nothing about. Casually mentioning she is not a part of Jokers Team too, so that at the end of this scene your like: “Okay... who are you, what kind of promise did you have with MY Joker without my consent and why are you a persona user but not part of my freaking team?” Which adds questions to the beginning of a game we actually already know. So in case you’ve watched that Prologue from the original P5 so often, that you are tired of watching Joker jump out of that window like the showoff he is, now you have a new scene that makes the beginning of the game interesting all over again. Really good job Atlus!

Now... let me tell you about my greatest fear about P5R. I know you all don’t want to hear that, but this game was literally Atlus milking the Akechi and the Akira/Ren x Akechi Fans. They knew they could sell a game twice for the same price, with relatively small changes that could have fitted into a DLC, if they just give all those fans more Akechi and more Akechi x Akira/Ren interactions. And for those who dislike Akechi and/or the ship they added Kasumi/Sumire as an alternative, being a new, interesting female character made to fit Joker in the weirdest possible way. So my greatest fear was, that P5R would be full of fanservice and nothing else but that. I feared that the Akira x Akechi ship was pushed to the absolut max (with Atlus still refusing to allow Joker to date him or any guy despite that...) and also pushing Kasumi/Sumire as the female love interest for the other side of the fandom.

Did Atlus do that? Lets say it that way... my fear was for nothing, but it was still a slight bit of fanservice for Akechi and pushing for Sumi (Kasumi/Sumire) there. It was kept in moderation tho (honestly, I’ve seen worse. Much worse. Seriously. Play Cold Steel, then you get what I mean XD) and as every game would use a trump-card like that as a selling-point at least a bit. So I do not blame Atlus for doing so as well, since, once again, it was kept in moderation.

So... about Akechi, Sumi and Maruki and what they add to the game and how they got included in the game and how it works for the game... I have to say, I think they did a really great job with adding those 3 character to the game. (Or in Akechis case, making him a real confidant...) Most of the time, when characters are added in a later version, you often can feel that those characters didn’t originally belong there and they feel like someone cut out a piece of a cake and tried to make the cake look whole again by adding a piece of a different cake, that has the same size, but still doesn’t really fit. Atlus didn’t cut the cake, they put cream on top of it XD

Lets start with talking about the good and bad of making Akechi an actual confidant. But before that, let me complain about the time-limits set for those 3 confidants. They were stressing me out! And with those time-limits, you are basically forced to focus in maxing those 3 first, so that you had barely time for your own teammate. And you have to max them, for the true ending and the third semester. So... I would have wished that wasn’t the case, but I get why it had to be... Now... please tell me I was not the only one facepalming when Akechi gave Joker a headshot and his confidant-level rose in the original game. Because it makes all those “Joker loves Akechi killing him” - jokes a lot less questionable then they should be ^^’ I felt a lot more comfortable playing billiard with Akechi instead - although I have to admit that it felt slightly weird and I was a bit uncomfortable at first. But you get used to it. And I think it also improves one certain part of the story greatly. And that is the part were the game wants to tell you that Joker and Akechi have such a great, strong, special bond. Because in the original game, they hardly ever do anything together, besides those short encounters every now and then. This time, it felt much more real for Akira and Akechi to be close, because they took the time and made the effort to actually spend time with each other and get to know each other. It also gives the player more chances to decide what to do with that traitor. And I guess new player were even more shocked now when Jokers favorite friend suddenly shot him in the head without even hesitating. It really makes the game better in a way. Especially with Akechi suddenly throwing his glove at Joker, telling him he hates him all of the sudden, when you are reaching level 8 of his confidant. It makes everything more round, when it comes to Akechi and his complicated relationship with Joker. There are no “bads” about Akechi becoming a real confidant. It was a good choice and made the game better. So in a way, Atlus wanting to make money by giving fanservice, benefited the game greatly.

Now to Maruki. He seemed to be... relatively unimportant. Honestly, if I didn’t knew I need to max him for the third semester, I probably wouldn’t have done it. Because he is just some random counselor how apparently finds Joker interesting - as many other characters do - so why should I care? Now imagine all those “blind” playing players who didn’t google how to get the third semester and true ending and wondering what they did wrong when they didn’t get it just to find out they had to max out some random confidant guy like Maruki. Those poor souls. So... is that a bad thing? No its not! You are supposed to be shocked and surprised in the third semester when you find out that this sympathetic but relativly boring confidant actually was the guy behind the fake reality. Especially after making it look like it was actually Sumis palace at first. I do have to say tho... he gave me “traitor-vibes” immediately, so I somehow saw it coming. But that is just me being wary of characters in lab coats thanks to certain games... They really made great work with that man tho. Every member of the team had counseling with him (Akechi aside) giving him the knowledge of most of their dreams and wished and problems and also making him look more sympathetic for being so friendly understanding and helpful. Even as the ruler of the fake reality, he actually had “good intentions” at the end, they were still egoistic, but he truly believed he would help people, making it hard to totally hate him and making it also understandable that the other characters didn’t hate him. Even after you want to despise him for what he did to Sumi, she herself said that without it, she might would not have made it, making it hard to hate him for it. The way he was added to the game, felt whole and never gave you the feeling that he didn’t belong there. So once again, good job!

Now... on to Sumi. She has her first encounter with Joker relatively early on in the game and you keep having scenes with her throughout the game, even if you do not do her confidant. Actually, whenever I was a bit sad that Kasumi wasn’t there, she suddenly showed up. Be it at the end of the Hawaii trip of the great scene from the school festival or her running towards Joker in Leblanc after he faked his death. You never have the feeling that she shouldn’t be as close to Joker as she is, because the game makes sure to let them have lots of interactions and encounters with each other, even outside of her confidant-scenes. They did give a hint or to of her true story too. So I wasn’t surprised when the truth came to light in the third semester. Overall I have to say they really overdid it a bit with the drama of her story, but it adds up to why Sumire is the way she is, after you force her to be herself. I was certainly sad I could only have her as my teammate so late in the game tho. Her powers are really great. And it it also a bit depressing if you want to date her (whish the game obviously wants you to do...) and have to wait until almost the end of the game to finally be able to do so. For a month at best no less. all those dates you missed... oh well, dating her is cute at least. I do have one big complain about her character tho. In this totally awkward scene were she was sitting in a Café with Joker and Akechi (or was I the only one feeling awkward sitting there with Boyfriend on the one and Girlfriend on the other side? ^^’) when Akechi - that sneaky bastard - asked her about the Phanthom Thieves she said she doesn’t think its right to count on them, that people should solve their problems themselves and not rely on others so much. Which is right on one hand. I mean, it was great foreshadowing. At some point people really just expected the Phantom Thieves to solve all their problems making way for their great downfall when they couldn’t meet the high expectations. BUT Sumi was the last of all the characters who had the right to say something like that. From the beginning as Kasumi, to the End as Sumire... she always relies on Joker for giving her strength, hope, motivation and a reason to fight and live and get stronger. I doubt she would have managed to overcome her trauma without him. So how did she solve and of her problems herself without always relying on others? I am sorry, but she was not the right person to say that. (But at least, after realizing Akira/Ren was Joker she immediately felt bad about talking not so nice about his team infront of him - although Mr-Sneaky-Bastard set this up on purpose so he should be the one apologizing here...) Anyway. Aside from the scene were the PT fought the god, were she was missing for some reason, she was added very well into the story and made a good addition to the team at the end. She earned her place in the game and made for a nice alternative dating-partner.

Finally... I wanna talk about the damn third semester. Because after all the work and stress we went to to get there... it was a bit of a letdown for me. Tho the start was a shocker with everything that happened, it dragged on and on and on and on and on and on and on. You go into the palace after having absolutly no real freetime between the final boss from the original game and this new final bosses palace. Here in this palace, you lose Kasumi, then you are forced to go out of the palace, just so you can walk around to watch your friend be happy for days with the game making it unnecessarily hard and time-consuming for you by refusing you to use insta-travel for no apparent reason. Then you go back to the palast, save Sumire and are forced to get out of it again. Then you go back in, are forced to go back out again, then you are forced to go to Mementos and go through all the new stupid levels there because otherwise you can’t continue with the palace. Then you go back to the palace AGAIN which seems to never end and has many strong enemy immune to physical attacks because saving SP is a total unnecessary thing in this immensely huge palace. And when you finally almost reached the end of the damn palace you are forced to make a stupid puzzle. URG! Now, you are finally through with the palace, now you have an immense amount of freetime, which still isn’t enough to max many more confidants especially not if you also want to use this last chance to max Sumi. And at this point, it just feels like enough. The game is going on for too long. It has to end. And yet, the final boss, just like this final palace and the third semester goes on and on and on and on and on. Every time you think you have beating him, he rises again and again and again and again. And was that fist-fight with Joker really necessary at the end?

Now that we are officially talking about the third semester... lets also talk about Akechi (again) and also some plotholes. So Akechi is like... having multiple personalities in the last part of the game. One time, he is an absolute bloodthirsty asshole and the next time he is your worried teammate. I mean... how did we go from: “Save your girlfriend yourself, Joker, because if I handle this, she will end up dead.” to Akechi stopping Sumi from running towards Dr.Maruki to keep her save from falling debris? I guess in the end being part of Jokers team finally got to him XD So... Akechis existence in the third semester is a huge problem for the plot. Despite the intentions of the true ending, Akechi is believed to be dead and only lives on because Maruki brought him back so he can have a second chance for a happy live with Joker. That would mean that he was made up by Marukis fake reality to fulfill either Jokers wish or Akechis wish. BUT the moment everyone else of the team realizes they were in a fact reality, that what they had and did wasn’t real, it was gone. Mona becoming a cat again. Futubas mother was gone. The moment both Akira and Akechi knew that Akechi wasn’t  real, he should have vanished, but he didn’t. Now lets say the reason he didn’t vanish, was because he was actually still alive in the real world (maybe in some sort of coma or something, which would explain his memory problems, because then he wasn’t made up by Maruki, but just got pulled out of whatever state he was in in reality...) then it is still a plothole why nobody, not even Maruki himself didn’t wonder why everyone elses true reality came back when they realized the truth but Akechi still stayed there until the fake reality was gone. I think in the end, Atlus didn’t fully think that truth and messed it up a little bit. Also... in Kasumis case. It is said that when people called her “Sumire” she just heard what her changed cognition wanted to hear, which was that people called her Kasumi. BUT if only her cognition was changed, why didn’t she end up in a psychiatry after claiming that her little sister Sumire is dead and that she herself is Kasumi? It doesn’t make any sense, if only her own cognition changed. Once again, not thought through in the end, I think.

Anyway... all in all it was a really good and enjoyable game. I gave it 9 out of 10 points.

[the-fandoms-are-watching-you]

TAG

I was tagged by the awesome @stay-weird-people 💙 you’re the sweetest

1. Nicknames: (Well since everyone in my family, including me, is Mexican most my nicknames are in Spanish) Cachorra, Chiquis, Silvi (cuz my first name is Silvia), May (apperantly cuz my middle name is Mariana idk), Oli

2. Gender: Female

3. Star sign: Aquarius

4. Height: Like 5′6, I’m the tallest girl on my mom’s side and one of the shortest on my dad’s side

5. Time: 3:00 p.m.

6. Birthday: February 7

7. Favourite bands/ groups: BTS, EXO, BIGBANG, 2NE1, BLACKPINK, 4Minute, Red Velvet, Twice, KARD, Imagine dragons, Fall Out Boy, and so many more

8. Favourite solo artists: Beyonce, CL, Rihanna, Nicky Minaj, Ed Sheeran, G-Dragon, Taeyan (i’m aware they’re also in bb), Sia, RM, Agust D (I’m also aware that both are in BTS), Bruno Mars, and a lot more.

9. Song stuck in your head: Love in the Brain (by Rihanna), Boy Meets Evil (by BTS), and idk why but Can’t Hold Us (by Macklemore & Ryan Lewis). Those three songs have been stuck in my head today (at different time during the day idk how)

10. Last movie you watched: Harry Potter and The sorcerer’s stone (I’m re-watching the whole franchise whish me luck)

11. Last show you watched: Supernatural (re-wathing it at the gym... I gotta admit that’s what inspired me to go everyday lmao)

12. When did you create your blog: apperantly on Thu, 28 Jun 2012 (so about 5 years ago, damn)

13. What do you post about: Whatever I like 😂 my blog doesn’t have an specific theme, fandoms maybe? Idk I like so many things.

14. Last thing you googled: “How do you figure out when you created your Tumblr account?” (I didn’t remember which summer I started using Tumblr)

15. Do you have any other blogs: No:(

16. Do you get asks: Rarely... not really. BUT IM ALWAYS BOTHERING MY MUTUAL HERE LMAO IM SORRY

17. Why did you choose your URL: Because I was in so many fandoms at the time, and I couldn’t really pick a theme to talk about nor was I into aesthetic things back them (and probably not today either) so I just decided to go for this (lol Im terrible at this)

18. Following: 356 (DAMN SON)

19. Followers: 464 (I WASNT AWARE OF THIS OMG WHY ARE YOU GUYS FOLLOWING ME BORING ASS BLOG, BUT DONT GET ME WRONG I LOVE YOU ALL)

20. Average hours of sleep: Like 6 hours-ish when I’m lucky :(((

21. Lucky number (s): I don’t really have one but you could say it’s 7

22. Instruments: Idk how to play any instruments :( but I would love to play the piano!

23. what are you wearing: Joggers, a t-shirt, and Socks

24. Dream job: well, my dream job is to become a beautician! And I’m actually studying for that career

25. Dream trip: Honestly, anywhere in the world, I would love to see all kinds of different places and cultures, learn about the people and their languages.

26. Favourite food: I don’t think I have one anymore. I love food waaaaay too much, anything tasty will make me super happy

27. Nationality: I’m Mexican 🇲🇽

28. Favourite song right now: (HOLY SHIT DONT DO THIS TO ME MY HOMIE OMG NO I CANT CHOSE ONE) I’ll just pick my two most recent favorite songs: MIC Drop Remix (by BTS ft. Steve Aoki) and Crystal Snow (also by BTS)

[dork-with-a-uke]

atm, i don't have the energy or clear enough head to write the whole story, but i really need to speak with someone and i don't have anyone irl to do it with. basically my sisters are mad at me that i never want to go out with them and stuff and act like i regulary go out with everyone else in this damn town, i just don't wanna hang out with them. which is so not the case. i'm not gonna get into too much detail, but my 'problem' is that i just feel so uncomfortable in my own skin, that i (1/2)

can’t stand being in public, around people. idk how to explain it so you can understand just how much i can���t stand my own presence, seeing my reflection in mirrors/windows/pictures. whenever i’m around people i feel like everyone’s starring at me wondering how do i even go outside looking like that. ik that it’s just my mind saying this, but i don’t feel comfortable in my skin when i’m just at home, what’s left for when i’m around people. it’s not that i don’t want to go out with my (2/3)

sisters, i just don’t want to go out at all. obviously that’s not possible, i force myself to go out with my friends once a week, but i don’t want to have to do it again with my sisters, since i live with them so i’m already spending time with them. ik that’s not an excuse and i sound like a horrible person and sister (and i feel that way too), but i’m always the ugly friend when hanging out with my friends, i don’t want to be the ugly sister too. idk how to explain it better than, whenever 

i’m in public i’m trying to be as invisible as i possibly can so no one sees how appalling i am. every time i go out i spend the whole time whishing i’d just dissapear. ik that’s not an excuse for being such a shitty sister, friend and person in general, but i can’t help it. i feel trapped in this state of living. and i can’t tell anyone how i feel because they’ll just say “there’s no reason to feel this way, you’re pretty”. no one ever understands and i feel like i’m just being overdramatic.

i’m sorry you feel that way. i can hear, by the way you talk about this, that you feel a lot of guilt for not going out with your sisters, and I understand the dilemma you’re facing. i know you’ve probably tried explaining this to them, and they’ve brushed it off, but i think you should explain just how important and how painful it is for you. i’m not going to tell you “there’s no reason to feel this way,” because i could tell you you’re pretty every day, and it probably wouldn’t make you believe it, even if it was the truth. i think you need to find that truth within yourself, and you will as you grow older. i believe that. in the meantime, the best thing you can do is explain, and show them. tell them what you just told me - it’s the most straightforward, i think. i understand the “i’m already spending time with them” thing, but do they know that? i think you should suggest something like hanging out, but at home, you know? bake a cake together, have a movie night. something that doesn’t necessarily involve going outside. i hope that you’ll find yourself soon, friend. once again, i’m sorry you’re feeling this way. 

[tcobeauty]

Birchbox: Small End of Summer + Customer Appreciation Day Hauls

All of my dealers My favorite retailers started putting their summer shit on sale back in August, and sent me me multiple emails to alert me to this fact (FML I gotta unsubscribe [lol no]), and who am I to resist? With Birchbox, it’s always a question of what do I actually need that I can justify spending a small amount of points, plus whatever’s on sale, plus whatever bonus or code they’re often. It’s a lot of fuzzy math, to be honest, which I’m sure will surprise no one. 

I've been wanting to switch back to the Whish Shave Cream, since it's much more emollient and luxurious than the Shea Moisture one I've been using, regardless of the fact that “Vitamin K” is probably a made-up thing. And I was out of my 100% Pure Blueberry Mascara, which is great for weekends and natural-only makeup days, so I scored some of that one sale as well. The Mirenesse Mattfinity Lip Color in Ibiza is very bright but also very fun fun and I actually really like this brand for longwear matte lips–the first shade I got from them was in a Birchbox sample extra (still the best one I’ve gotten to this day tbh) and it’s Tokyo, a perfect blue-red that wears like gangbusters. I got Milan, a more neutral brick brown, for my sister’s wedding last year and discovered that it doesn’t last quite as long, which is weird, given that it’s the same damn product. We’ll see how this very bright cool coral holds up on a day when I’m feeling particularly bold. Everything in this teeny little haul was on sale with an extra discount on top of it, however, so I'd say it was definitely worth it at almost 50% off savings.

Paid: $40 / Value: $78 Savings: $38 / 49%

And then Birchbox’s “Customer Appreciation Day” suddenly rolled around out of nowhere, so there were bonus points and sales and all kinds of madness I had to partake in because my soul is weak, so very weak. I decided to stock up on my BFF Dr. Jart’s Dermaclear Micro Water and try out some new hair goodies, too, since I’m growing it out to see what works with my new longer(ish) length.

These two bonus goodies were included by the Birchbox team, and while you all know I love a good exfoliation and can’t wait to give this Vasanti Enzymatic Face Rejuvenator, I’m still wary of the Oribe Supershine Moisture Cream, because I’m always worried about my hair getting greasy and weighed down. I’ve gotten several Oribe samples in the past, and I have to admit that I’m a little afraid to try any of them because they might work some kind of devil magic on my noggin and then I’ll be forced to spend as much on haircare as I do skincare, and that’s just not in my budget for now or the foreseeable future.

Enter the Off-Duty Hair Kit, which is pretty much every day for me because I don’t like to do a whole lot to my hair if I can help it. I’ve recently started blow-drying again in an effort to save some time in the mornings, but’s it been looking like I need to wash it at night and sleep on it for it to not look too poofy when styled. I’d been wanting to try both the Parlour Moisturizing Sea Salt and the Number Four Sugar texture sprays, and I’m intrigued by styling creams of all kinds, so we’ll see how the bumble Don’t Blow It and the R&CO High Dive creams do. I’ve been using a teeny tiny dab of the Moroccan Oil on days when I blow dry, but it might still be weighing me down a tad. We’ll see how it fares when things get drier int he coming months.

I loved the Brio Geo RosArCo spray I got in a previous Birchbox, so I figured I’d try out the shampoo and conditioner in this travel-size set to see how they do. I love the fragrance and they do seem nourishing, but I’m wondering if I need to use the spray as a heat protectant for blow drying and save the rest for travel or dry winter days to come. 

Paid: $41 / Value: $112 Savings: $70 / 62%

Not too shabby for two pretty random one-off hauls, right? I like to think that I’ve been getting a little bit better at maxing out my savings on these hauls, so I was not-so-secretly tickled to see how much I saved on so many goodies. I do think I’m starting to reach a critical mass again, so it might be time for a purge here before the holiday season picks up.