#of course! I write them for myself too!
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
fascinating staging happening here
#seduce him. SEDUCE HIM. put your BACK into it. get that man of god on his KNEES#i had something to say about crassus here too but i already had to force myself to write about crassus' policy making and octavian's#there are some places that crassus need not show up and the medici are one of them (<< a lie lmao of COURSE crassus is here too)#although it's less crassus and more like. the stage of the roman republic is always there. vaguely. a bit. lingering.#and when im using the stage of the roman republic im actually talking about something else. as one does. following literary tradition.#i feel like i talked about this more back in 2021 and then decided to do other stuff for awhile and never circled back to clean up those#thoughts. either they will arrive in comic form or they will simply have to float around untethered in the tags
259 notes
·
View notes
Text
I really need to go to sleep but I also really need to get this out of my mind
Force Ghost Fox, wandering around the Galaxy. His brothers cannot see him. There aren't left any people who could see him, anymore.
He visits Bail and Breha, too, and sits with them and wishes that he could reach out, that he could tell them that he is right there.
He watches their daughter as well. A cute, tiny little thing. He sits besides her cot at nights and hums at her, even though he knows she cannot hear him. He watches her sleep as he does so, and he wishes that she was his, too.
One night, she awakens, and her little face scrunches up like she's going to cry. Fox shushes her, out of instinct, no matter how little it will be of help-
She stops, and looks up, and Fox swears that she is looking straight at him.
No, no, she cannot be. He is just imagining it.
Then she smiles, and reaches towards Fox.
#ye I'm gonna write this tomorrow#just. little leia and her friendly ghost called buir#bail and breha see their baby smile and laugh at air and are a little concerned lmao#then leia gets a bit older and she seems to have an imaginery friend#they don't think too much of it#until one night she says that buir misses them#who? fox buir of course silly mama and silly papa#ohhhhh great now I made myself emotional#sw#tcw#commander fox#leia organa#bail organa#breha organa#bail/breha/fox
186 notes
·
View notes
Text
guys, lend me some inspiration or motivation or whatever. i wanna go make a spreadsheet plotting out one of my books TwT
#i need to plot them in order to write them! i know this!#but it is hard#i know the characters. i know the stories! they've been consuming my life since i was in fucking middle school.#but for some reason getting it all in order and figuring all that out...#is too hard for me.#and of course there's the problem where i just wanna Think about them instead of writing them but you know#anyway.#god i want to publish these stupid things before i die!#i really do#lol for most of my life i've had this delusion that i'll become a very famous and popular author and then all my problems will go away.#<- this particular insane delusion has been my life preserver since i was 13 years old.#and i know it's not true.#but it's all i've got to hold onto#(lol)#(kills myself) <- not really though#but yeah anyway. plotting a book is difficult.#diaerie
16 notes
·
View notes
Text
the doctor isnt neurodivergent or autistic or adhd or nonbinary or genderqueer or asexual. what the doctor is, is Not From Here
#which necessarily of course says something abt their (non)whiteness#(i had all these words in quotation marks first so mentally add those to whiteness too)#but we've them be black for all of 1.5 episode now so#lets see how that develops you know#also i dont think i understand the politics of that part well enough to say much abt it#not that i probably understand the politics of these parts better but#im annoyed enough abt this Thing happening these years. in these 20s i guess. the 'representation' thing#to complain abt it anyway#the dsm isnt real and it isnt gonna fuck you buddy#maybe i'll read some books and then one day i'll write an essay driven by spite and pettiness#i wonder if i can make the thesis statement about the tension between their status of main character#in a 60 year running family adventure show vs this therapy thing we're doing now#like. you cant do that. in terms of like. what story is and does. what a character is and does. it strains#in an interesting way. like im not saying they Shouldnt have done it. im just observing. that you cant do that really. i think#or maybe you can! but i'll find that out#i also dont know shit abt narratology or whatever so. need to read books first. sigh#always have to pause my thoughts to read myself in first its so annoying. esp bc i rarely really do#bc then new thoughts new things to do you cant do EVERYTHING. you can do almost nothing. bane of my existence really#but like you might even be able to say smth interesting here about whether you can call them traumatised at all#remember that article i saw around on tumblr a few years ago i think that was abt like. some scholar in the middle east maybe#saying that ptsd is a western thing bc it necessitates a Post#all of this is western. psychiatry is western. its all stories. how you conceptualise trauma is a story#whos Other is story#where youre from is a story what you stand for is a story who you are is a story#ah. checked the article. dr samah jabr. palestinian. i'll start with her book maybe
63 notes
·
View notes
Text
mcdonald goodsir talking scene but its like an hour bc i just would like to see them talk more
#oh fics i must write things i must think#not to imply im not giving my two current fics my all i just am doing varying degrees of brain power on writing#i want to do a refresh on my one college gothic course bc i'm going to be doing ghosts in my next#multichapter fic where idk if this will change talk about things i need to pin down but#i think it will be collins crozier and eventually tozer who are able to see ghosts and they exist but i'm#going to be keeping it where generally ppl don't think this is real at all slash like#idk the spiritualism movement etc is like our real world but the thing is ghsots REALLY DO exist i guess osrt of just furthering#the yes and of tunnbaq actually eating these guys souls#but i also dont know what else im changing bc like rn its just like ok everything the same but i get to describe how to certain characters#its MUCH worse actually like imagine tozer seeing irving in camp only for him to later see his body being brought back idk#i think im gonna combo i tmaybe with the one wild thing i started back when venus in furs had me GOT#where tozer makes his own mutiny but ugh we shall see#i'm considering letting manson also see ghosts idk man i know this fic cant to everything but im also like#oh tee hee i can write morfin and collins and oh tom hartnell is here and of course tozer#and then new we are also saying fuck it and adding crozier which opens#lots of things#ENSEMBLE CAST CURSE YOU like looove this show but why are there so many guys#if i want to write a sick and cool fic i have to think about too many guys and then i shoot myself in the foot by going#yeah ok..... and what if we explored so much in this one thing#says the guy who also has to go through hoops to write terror fic sorry i forget my roots#i act like i didnt fucking make fictional show mickey's sister the same as his real life one and made her a lesbain in high school#LIKE MY BROTHER IN CHRIST it doesnt matter#i guess its just bc i worry i dont get these guys and again theres too many of them#like what if i write c#well they are all fictional#anyways i shouldn't put in the tags so much if you read this im giving u a kiss
8 notes
·
View notes
Text
The poem evokes human greatness and human vulnerability. People are “godlike” in their courage and skill, but even the greatest mortals fall and clutch the dust between their bloody fingers. The beautiful word minunthadios , “short-lived,” is used of both Achilles and Hector, and applies to all of us. We die too soon, and there is no adequate recompense for the terrible, inevitable loss of life. Yet through poetry, the words, actions, and feelings of some long-ago brief lives may be remembered even three thousand years later.
--Emily Wilson's introduction to the Iliad
#so. we've come to the Iliad section in my Early World Literature class. and in that context we're utilizing the public domain translation by#A. S. Kline which made me think: you know what would be extremely fucking cool? since I'm going to have access to the Kline text until#the course closes in December. why don't I at least start the Wilson version and see how the two translations differ? so I'm now reading#The Iliad#as translated by Wilson and performed by the utterly masterful Audra McDonald. or well. I _would be except I'm so delighted. stunned. by#the incisive thought-provokingness of her introduction I keep needing to pause and write down various quotes: just this whole idea of#the poem revolving around how all all our deaths shall come too soon and there is no adequate compensation for that awful fact just FUCK#linguistics#mythology#folklore#fairy tales#lit geekery#book babbling#(oh I am already so fucking deep in this fannish hell and I haven't even really started her translation: like the Kline one is fine. but#it's very focused on *trying* to be Homeric you know? so there are all these very archaic references ala to Apollo#as Smintheus. which I then have to stop and look up oh. that means he's the mouse god and being the mouse god is important because#it ties back to him being an oracular god. which is then why the Greeks want to turn to another oracular god when he gets all pissy at them#and on one level. learning that mice were associated with the power of prophecy? extremely cool shit. on the other. well I have to#read a large chunk of this text in a fucking week Kline my good bud was it really necessary to provide an odd mouse reference I then#needed to find the context for *myself* I can already tell Wilson's tendency to provide context. both in the intro and just in general#wanting to make it readable terms will make this so! much easier of an introduction. (Kline. by contrast. would be really fucking cool if#you were a third-time reader and wanted all the marvelous nuance. just *rubs forehead* not a great intro when you're only focusing on#this text for a fucking week)
15 notes
·
View notes
Text
Lookie what I got! The rarest of collector's editions, with only one in existence! (There's an @ symbol in place of a © on the title page.)

(There's only one because I fixed it after I ordered my proof copy.)
Someday this will be very valuable, for sure!
#optimism ftw#why yes I do feel a bit stupid for that rather boneheaded error#but instead of dwelling on that I'd rather think about how much people will surely appreciate it years in the future#my writer friends are very talented you see#and there are some great stories in here#I like to think that someday the anthologies we put together will be looked back on in amazement#because how could so many famous writers have known each other from the start?#it's a nice thought#no idea what the future really holds of course#but I enjoy this possible future#just like I enjoy writing about Narcissus as a vampire who wants a reflection#and the walking-out-of-the-underworld Orpheus & Eurydice story as cyberpunk#there are many other cool things in here#and it comes out soon!#and pre-orders are up!#everywhere but Amazon for some aggravating reason!#clearly they are Too Big To Fail and no one is going to give them a proper kick in the pants for not getting their act together#like they were supposed to weeks ago#here's hoping their page works by launch day at least#we'll see#anyways!#yay I have my proof copy!#and it looks good!#I did the cover myself#my objectivity is shot but I think it turned out nice and professional#Shatterlore#book recs#indie author life#bookblr
14 notes
·
View notes
Text
2 guys dialogue in, 2 more to go!
#its riven (hair down)!#but yea its taking so long omg#i wrote way more this time#i dont think this is gonna happen everytime but sometimes the ideas...#anyways after i put these guys up i think ill immediately try to update my plan#like my pinned post or just make a new one to show where im going#or hope to go#its in my head rn but i should write it down#one thing i wanna do but dont know when to is like create a shop where u exchange fake currency#u get from like daily logging in#maybe mini games would be cool to get them from too#the problem is that i would have to make the games lmao#and i want them to be interesting if im gonna make em! so in other words im not gonna make it easy for myself#the shop could have gifts to give to the guys to increase affection levels#but yea idk when to do that or how i wanna do it so its just on the maybe pile for now#let it stew in my mind for months and months#since its not absolutely necessary#i also added a little more dialogue for vivien#for hugging and kissing mainly#what should i tag this#dev is rambling#in the tags of course#ocs#boyfriend rally#bfrally#gamedev#web game#dating sim
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
just finished a session with my psychiatrist. 🧍🏻♂️ we realized i compare myself a lot to other writers based on the things i'm weak at.
#like lyrical more ambient & poetic writing#OF COURSE i'll feel like shit and unskilled and absolutely inferior#i realized too that i am more capable of appreciating in others' works the aspects of writing that i'd say i'm good at#like dialogue immersion and plot#i don't necessarily beat myself with a stick when i see other people be good at them. 😟 which is good but i just never noticed this#aka the stuff i feel secure about. that i don't feel threatened anymore when other people excel at it. huh.#zee.chats
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
i'm pretty sure my parents have heard herald of darkness more than nick's screams coming from my room at this point
#mk.op#'LET'S LISTEN TO MUSIC' my drunk ass will say at 9:22pm even though i should be in bed attempting to unwind#will still never forget the time i was chilling with quetzal (my dog)#when he was allowed to come upstairs and when my parents were gone he'd just chill on my bed and look outside the window#likely waiting for them to return (mainly my dad)#i can't remember if we were home alone or not but i was watching grave danger with headphones at the start of my csi resurgence#when i was working on half past midnight which was the first fic that started my csi writing spree in 2018 or so#(funnily enough how 'half' made its way into the title one of my earlier alan wake WIPs too)#(if and when i finish it it'll likely be the first AW fic i'll officially publish to ao3)#(I know i've done a few tumblr drabbles before)#but anyway so i was listening to grave danger with headphones max volume#getting into nick's head as he laid buried alive in that box#because the whole point of the fic was to explore what nick might have been thinking during the estimated 24+ hours in isolation#surrounded by dirt#at some point i can't remember w hen#but i freaked myself out a little bit (and i'm not claustrophobic)#i gasped VERY LOUDLY and threw my headphones off#quetzal jumped up and fell off my bed and i FELT SO BAD#cause i just scared the shit out of him#in hindsight i can kind of laugh knowing ultimately he was okay of course#but it's interesting to reflect on just how into nick's head i had gotten#i can only hope i can do the same for alan and niko
6 notes
·
View notes
Text
nothing interesting here it's the exact same scene i just like seeing it
#french 13 isnt my favourite but i think she did a good job here. also in the gallery scene i liked that too#french yaz i love as much as english yaz#there IS smth interesting here btw but no one else will find it interesting but 'i know' is one of those#idk#like.........measuring things. for me. when im learning a new language#bc in english it's i know obvs and in french evidently it's 'i know' too - je sais#in dutch if you said 'i know' that'd be wrong#you have to say 'i know it'. or i suppose you could inverse it and do 'weet ik' and then you can leave out the 'it' but thats not the poin#so when im learning a new language im always like is it i know or is it i know it#and thats a stand in for lots of other similar questions of course#it's a never ending list of similar questions#but it's like the thing i remind myself of#so i dont go around saying 'ik weet'#i dont mind making like conjugation or grammar mistakes that much. thats like. it'll happen its whatever#but these kind of 'i can see how you got there but thats not how we say it' errors? hate it. dont want to make them#which is why i take forever to start writing/speaking bc yes i CAN make that sentence#but idk if thats how a french speaker would make that sentence so i'll wait until ive heard someone say 'je sais'#dont want to be speaking english/dutch with french words you know
15 notes
·
View notes
Text
July has 5 Mondays this year.
Since I put a new chapter of every ongoing story every Monday That means 5 new chapters for all 5 ongoing stories, and that is if I don't start something else, which, knowing me, I most certainly will.
@_@ I do this to myself, honestly.
I am happy that I got all of June done to be able to enjoy SasuHinaMonth.
I have a new multi-chapter and a dozen one-shots coming your way for SasuHinaMonth. Are we ready!
#sasuhina month#writing#fanfic writing#I know I should probably let something end before I start writing something else#but what if the fun in that#I have 3 stories that are just nagging at me to start them#and of course I had to start a SasuHina now that Red Memories will be done mid-way through June#I just need to stop myself from starting a new story every month#or I need to get faster at writing#that would work too
6 notes
·
View notes
Text
The new Token Human story just went up on Patreon! (The $3 and up tiers get to see it before the rest of the world.) I'll post it for the free tier on Monday, when it goes up here too.
This story involves Zhee complaining about things, which is always a good time.
#so many opinions from this guy#can't blame him for some of them#Zhee#The Token Human#Patreon#this one ended up much longer than I expected too#I really thought it'd be quick#but NOPE#multiple pages of local mysteries and alien fauna and Opinions About Things#it's fun though#because of course it is#I would hardly write it if I wasn't enjoying myself
13 notes
·
View notes
Text
man I wanna get in fh related fandom discourse but in like a quiet way where we all go around and directly share notes with one another. maybe a power point presentation is involved
#^ this is literally just. a debate. or a discussion. There are words for this#Ive noticed there are more or less like. Three distinct stances on fh people take depending on who they gaf about#I dont want to start Real Petty Discourse is the issue I just want to have a conversation… I want it so dearly…#I see fh fans get mad about toxic!fh takes and state that its wildly inaccurate. and I feel the need to argue but then its like well#I take a step back and go okay I see where theyre coming from actually. because a lot of toxic!fh takes are made with like.#only sad jimmy angst in mind. and so scott becomes the villain for those fics and I look at them and go. he would not fucking say that#BUT THEN ALSOOO I get where THATS coming from too because he’s very mean to jimmy in DL so when people want to write their sad jimmy fics#of course that’s where they’re going to go. because something is off about traffic!FH its true#so rancher shippers and such see that and go oh okay and run with it#Its just. Very interesting all around?#deranged.fh.posting#idk if anyone gets what im talking about. I look at the fh tag pretty often and used to be pretty into rancher fics myself so—#My conclusions are based on that#bree barks so fucking loud
17 notes
·
View notes
Note
you seem to have a wide taste in books !! what are some books that you would recommend ??
Hmmm I wonder. I have the feeling I just read the same couple of books over and over, and at times only different iterations of the same story, like in that line by Borges ("the various intonations of a few metaphors").
I find recommending books without knowing anything at all about the person asking rather difficult. What I'd suggest to one may differ greatly from what I'd recommend to someone else. I'll give a list of some of my favourite books that I think are enjoyable in general:
— Thoughts by Pascal
— Cain: a mystery by Lord Byron
— The Iliad by Homer
— Crime and Punishment by Dostoievsky
— Othello by Shakespeare
— Pedro Páramo by Juan Rulfo
— Cyrano de Bergerac by Edmond Rostand
— The fragments of the Presocratics
— La Regenta by Leopoldo Alas, Clarín
— Tractatus Logico-philosophicus by Wittgenstein
— East of Eden by John Steinbeck
— Vita nova by Dante
— Contributions to the Founding of the Theory of Transfinite Numbers by Georg Cantor
— Caligula by Albert Camus
— North and South by Elizabeth Gaskell
— Peter Pan by J. M. Barrie
— Some essays by Russell. I personally love Mysticism and Logic
— Metamorphoses by Ovid
Poetry is perhaps harder to recommend because at times it translates horribly, but in general I love Baudelaire, Rimbaud, Lorca, Juan Ramón Jiménez, Rilke, Byron, Quevedo, Góngora, Lope de Vega, Horace, Catullus, Ovid, Tennyson, Maiakovsky, Garcilaso de la Vega, Oliverio Girondo, Vicente Huidobro, Emily Brontë, T. S. Eliot, César Vallejo, Luis Cernuda and Edgar Allan Poe, to name a few.
#I talk too much#I wanted to say The tragic sense of life by Unamuno and Philosophy and Poetry by María Zambrano#but I thought maybe they'd be hard to find in translation. They're both approachable texts of philosophy beautifully written though#Unamuno's essay Vida de Don Quijote y Sancho (translated as Our Lord Don Quixote in English according to Wikipedia?) is also beautiful#I adore Schopenhauer and Nietzsche but I'm not sure I'd recommend them to anyone. Probably you can't go wrong with Kierkegaard though#I know what some of these books look like (like Wittgenstein's Tractatus or Cantor's Foundations)#but I swear they're approachable without specific academic background. The last line of Wittgenstein's Tractatus is one of my favourite#lines ever in the history of anything‚ philosophy or literature‚ but to be as hitting as it is you need to reach it at the end of the book#I think despite what it looks like both Cantor and especially Wittgenstein have an aesthetic intent in their writing#Wittgenstein in particular reminds me of Kierkegaard and Rilke and also of Unamuno and Zambrano. And of course Schopenhauer et al.#The Tractatus is very similar in my opinion to Huidobro's Altazor which is just amazing but I don't know how it would translate#These books I like in form and not just in content (although form is content like I think happens in Wittgenstein's Tractatus)#so when possible I'd read them in their original languages.I myself can't read German and know but very little of Russian and Ancient Greek#and a bit of Latin so I must be missing a lot of those. Nonetheless they're great in what I can get through translation#Perhaps you'd have the chance of enjoying them in full#If you can't read Russian I am actually quite specific with the translation of Crime and Punishment haha There's a concept#Razumikhin develops through the book at several points and often translators aren't consister with the word which makes the readers lose#the view of this development. And I happen to think the development works alongside the narrative of Svidrigailov#and also with what happens towards the end with Porfiry and Raskolnikov so I think it's important#In English there are several translations that maintain the coherence such as the one by Pevear and Volokhonsky#(the only one I can remember right now but I could check the rest). Garnett's translation is everywhere but that one doesn't do it#Hmmm Pedro Páramo in English takes some liberties and La Regenta isn't as funny which is what happens with Wuthering Heights#and The three musketeers in translation even when the translations are more accurate#I haven't recommended Wuthering Heights because I take you've read it but that's my favourite book#And I haven't recommended Pandora Hearts because that's a manga and you asked for books but it does some very interesting things#that I think are in line with many of the books listed here (as I said‚ I basically like the same few things retold over and over haha)#There are many books I am itching to recommend but that I can't do freely without some knowledge of the person asking#Like Steinbeck's arthurian novel or idk Gone with the wind#I hope this list is enjoyable enough. I'm not sure if I've been able to avoid being too partial#I suppose one has to bear the conditions of their existence and can't ever entirely get rid of themselves haha
20 notes
·
View notes
Text
me: just started electromagnets
also me: I have a save for mirene and co, I have a save for keith... the only logical sequence would be to also do a story for tobias/galactic crusade
#I was in cas for it already it's totally happening#oh and of course the perfect timing because the lenniversary is sep 7th so keep an eye out for it then#I have only started setting up the families but maybe giving myself a little deadline will motivate me a bit#life is so chaotic that my pookies and their stories are literally the only thing that's saving me right now without exaggeration#I wish I could spill everything at once that has happened to them in my head in the past couple of years#these years were so formative for me like I've been through some shit and I feel like my characters have also grown massively#pre-2021 they were so different and my writing was so different as well#like I reread sometimes and am like no way I wrote this#I think accepting my neurodivergence also really changed the game in terms of perspective and my gf helped with this so much too#oh and re: galactic crusade story - I originally thought I'll get there in new fletcher chronicles but honestly it's unrealistic#and I don't want to rush and want to enjoy keith too#so I thought it will be separate so I can switch between the stories whatever I'm inspired for the most
5 notes
·
View notes