#obviously you're going to think whatever you want but as far as my two cents goes

[merp-blerp]

TW: Discussion of sexual assault and suicidal ideation

I've been seeing some debate about Calypso and whether or not she sexually assaulted Odysseus and I want to throw in my two cents.

I'll say straight out of the gate that I don't currently like her much. I feel pretty icky about her personally.

Comparing Ody's behavior in Epic prior to "Love in Paradise" vs during the song feels so... clearly different. He seems very traumatized by whatever has been happening on that isle. It almost feels out of character for him to consider dying instead of fighting to get home alive like he had been, but putting myself in his shoes I can see how he came to that through what's textually known. He has been trapped on that isle for 7 years—that's nearly a decade, with no way to get out, everyone he knows and loves dead or far away with no way to know where he is or if he's alive. While I obviously would never think that's a good decision, I can see how he got to the point of wanting to end it. And if he's been sexually assaulted like he was in The Odyssey, I understand it more due to how that can warp a person's mental health.

I've seen some say, "Calypso is just a sweetie who doesn't know how to love properly" (paraphrasing of an actual comment I've seen). Even if she really just doesn't know how to care for a mortal, as many of the gods seemingly don't, I think she understands her power over mortals with her "Bow down now to the immortal Calypso" comment. She also understands that Odysseus doesn't want her, with the first part of her response to Ody's threats being "Oh handsome, you may try". She knows that he may try to escape by killing her (even though she can't die). Honestly, why would she feel the need to trap him if she didn't know good and well that he would want to escape her? She knew what she was doing was something that would make him want to run. Calypso being a goddess automatically gives their dynamic a power imbalance of course. Even though the assault is only implied, the fact that she's trapping Ody against his will, super infatuated by him, and still says "Soon, into bed we'll climb and spend our time", makes me feel like the indication is clear. What's stopping her from trying to have "sex" with him (sex isn't sex without consent)? She's already ignored all his declines. She seems to think that forcing her "love" onto him will make him love her. Yes, she uses lovey-dovey language so I doubt it would've appeared violent, but sexual assault doesn't have to look violent and the perpetrator doesn't have to appear aggressive. It's telling that I've seen some say, "Save that energy for Antinous" because Antinous is much more obviously bad, but this kind of thing isn't always obvious. That kind of assault is still extremely traumatizing whether it's sugarcoated as if it's love or not. It's dismaying that some reactions to Calypso bypass her potential assaulting or "She's weird, but she seems to care for him!" And since the sexual part of the assault is technically subtext (for now, who knows about later), I'll say that even if Calypso didn't sexually harm him, she still forces physical and verbal intimacy onto him and traps him so he can't leave. We see that. That's still assault. The only reason why I don't feel similarly about Epic's version of Circe is that her intent wasn't to have sex with Ody but to distract and throw him off with talk of sex so she could stab him as he's vulnerable; Circe never wanted to have sex with Ody in actuality. Calypso's intent was romantic intimacy and she didn't care if Odysseus said no, she completely bypassed it. Calypso saying "You're mine, all mine" feels as threatening as Circe's "I've got you" was meant to be.

Anything can change between now and the next two sagas. It could either be fully confirmed or denied that sexual assault took place. I actually don't expect either, as I don't think Jay would go too deep into such a traumatic concept in Epic, but then again I also didn't expect suicidal ideation to be brought up at all and it absolutely shocked me when it was, so I could be wrong. But whether it's confirmed or not, I don't blame any Epic fans who don't like Calypso or even hate her over what she did and what it's implied she did. It's icky watching some fans tell others they shouldn't hate Calypso because of this or that as if this isn't a sensitive and complex topic. It's creepy. I don't think we should tell people not to hate a character associated with sexual assault. The sexual assault might be subtext, but subtext is important and sometimes is implemented intentionally. Not every part of a story is going to be given to you at face value. Just because "Epic didn't say that" doesn't mean that the implication doesn't matter. People interact with stories in different ways, so you can disagree with others—no one can take that from you, but you don't get to tell someone they can't feel a certain way about a character. I don't like saying this because I really shouldn't have to put it in this perspective for it to be understood, but I can't help but feel like if Calypso and Ody's genders were swapped some people would treat this implication differently. Sexually or not she hurts him.

Normally I don't like taking lore from The Odyssey and automatically applying it to Epic, as Epic has changed a lot of rules from The Odyssey because Jay wants to tell this story his own story. For example, I personally choose not to assume Eury and Ody are brothers-in-law in Epic like they are in The Odyssey because that hasn't been stated in Epic so far. But to me, the implications of Ody's sexual assault are there enough for me personally to think that it might take place in both stories. Jay seems to want Epic to be accessible to many people, so it doesn't surprise me that this element of The Odyssey was brought up in a more subtextual/"hinted at" way.

Calypso is a very interesting character, maybe the most out of all the Epic antagonists so far for me, but we don't have to think of her as not doing anything wrong in order to enjoy that character, her songs, her cute physical character design, or Barbara Wangui's beautiful voice.

[The remainder of this post contains potential spoilers for the unreleased (to date) Vengeance Saga under the cut]

[Edit: Now complete with some post-Vengeance Saga release points]

Another defense of Calypso I've seen is that in the snippets for "I'm Not Sorry for Loving You", Ody says he loves Calypso, but not in the way she wants him to. This could mean they're friends and therefore doubt about the sexual assault could be cast.

It's hard to assess this because the saga's not out yet, but it's worth remembering that abuse can come out of care, in a complicated way. You can care for someone so much you end up hurting them, usually out of wanting to control them. Calypso seems to fit that concept. And most Epic snippets don't give full context, naturally, so who knows why Ody says this at the moment. Maybe he means it, or maybe he's bluffing to guarantee he'll get what he wants (which is to be set free in this instance), like when meeting Athena, or to appease a god, like when "apologizing" to Poseidon in "Ruthlessness". And of course, victims don't have to hate their perpetrators if they choose not to. Odysseus can care about Calypso and she can still have hurt him really badly. Both of these things can be true.

The way I read it, Calypso doesn't love Odysseus like she thinks she does. She's infatuated by him and cares for him enough to not be obviously cold like all the other obstacles Ody faced initially are. She declares that she loves him as soon as he wakes up on her isle without knowing him at all. She didn't even know his name. The washed-up person on her isle could've been anyone and she likely would've "loved" them. Calypso only loves Ody because he stops her loneliness, not for who he is. When she begins to state that she loves him she doesn't even know him. Over the 7 years, she seems to have potentially gotten to know him a bit, saying "I know your life's been hard", but Odysseus himself asserts that she doesn't really know what he's been through. You can call someone (against their will, let me remind you) "my dear, my love for life" all you want, but that doesn't mean you love them. Ody's her first companion in years if not ever, of course she cares for him on a basic level. She won't kill him or let him jump off a cliff. But she doesn't love him or treat him like a human and obey his boundaries and wants. She treats him like an object or pet she owns and has to guard.

In "I'm Not Sorry For Loving You" Calypso says that Ody is all she's ever known because she was abandoned. It's understandable that she would latch onto a living creature after being alone for so long. But that's not necessarily love, at least not to me. If I love someone I wouldn't bypass their refusal to do something. And I wouldn't trap them with me and not let them go, even when they're about to jump off a cliff because they see no way out. I'm not sure if Calypso means to bring malice, she at least says she "bring(s) no pain", but she does regardless or if she intends to. Calypso hasn't had anyone in her company, let alone someone to love, for so long, maybe in her whole life. That's why she doesn't know what love is, so of course when she catches fickle feelings for Odysseus she assumes that's love and has no clue what to do with her "love", as she admits in "I'm Not Sorry For Loving You". Calypso's actions are understandable, but that doesn't mean they're excusable or not abusive. What she does to him is understandable, but selfish and only serves herself, which isn't what you do to someone you love. Note that the way I use understandable here does not equate to forgivable, it just means conceivable. And her apology to him really waters down the magnitude of her actions, saying she "pushed" him, "came on too strong", and that her love might've been "too much" for Ody.

I apologize for this being such a long rant, but I wanted to cover all the excuses for Calypso I'd seen and speak my mind on why I think they're misguided at best.

Post-Vengeance Saga Edits:

Now that The Vengeance Saga has been released, I can comfortably say that I still don't like Calypso, and I think this saga just encourages me to do that. I wasn't anticipating the entirety of "I'm Not Sorry for Loving You" to basically have been featured in the snippets. I was expecting the official song to give more context, maybe showcasing Ody and Calypso having a dialogue, but no! That was really it. And I'm honestly happy for it. It seems like the show recognizes that Calypso is in the wrong, with the way we aren't meant to really ruminate on Ody leaving her. The excuse I talked about above using the theory that Calypso and Odysseus would turn out to have been friends because he said he loved her? I just don't think that held much water by release. I particularly want to point out the way @gigizetz drew Ody's face as he leaves in the commissioned animatic from Jay's stream:

While I can't say for certain that he doesn't mean the "I love you" in some way... he doesn't look like he means it to me. There's no lovey-softness in his eyes, like you might have when you look at your friends when saying I love you. He looks beaten down. Tired. Above, I proposed that Ody might just be blowing smoke to further get what he wants from her. I don't think there's quite enough insight for me to say I was necessarily right on that, but Ody doesn't actually appear that attached to her, certainly not enough so for me to confidently say that I think his "I love you" is genuine. He doesn't even look like he'll miss her, he looks beyond ready to go as she shouts, not pained by her tears. Honestly, Ody might've just said that so she'd stop talking so he could leave. Now there is one more saga left, so maybe he'll wistfully mention or remember her, but I'm not really expecting it based on the official visuals that Jay okay'd. Humbly, I'll say that I don't think Odysseus feels much for Calypso. We don't get happy moments of them together and not even a proper goodbye filled with mutual pain. We just get her backwards apology that basically says, "Sorry I hurt you, but not fully. Shut up and let me talk about me and justify why I trapped you. Wish you'd stop rejecting me despite the fact that I've hurt you. Let me shout that I hate that I fell for you—only because this hurt me unlike I wanted when I kidnapped you—who cares if it hurt you." This moment is not at all a redemption for Calypso. It's her downfall. Her negative character arc. She didn't want to be alone so bad she trapped a person against his will and now she is alone forever (in this show). She can't even have Ody as a friend (and she won't accept purely his friendship anyway based on how the song ends). Who knows how different things would've been if she had just been more... normal when he washed up on her isle? The situation was tragic for them both in different ways, but I'm not sorry for Calypso. Calypso is so interesting as a character. Side-lining her actions just bards us from being able to assess her.

[i-sneezed]

Some Elriel evidence that doesn't get much attention.

First of all, if you're just having fun with your ships, you do you, man. I'm not here to rain on your parade.

However, there are so many people out there that are CONVINCED of Elucien/Gwynriel that I can't take it anymore and I have to throw in my two cents, so here we go. I'm gonna break it down by ship.

Elucien

There's no way, bro. And we can set aside the fact that if that ship were to sail it would be the same sort of love story as Nessian (reluctant mates).

The most obvious thing to discuss here is that Elain is clearly not interested. And neither, to some extent, is Lucien.

Let's look back to ACOWAR when Lucien talks to Elain in the library. He thinks about Jesminda. "[She] had loved him without question, without hesitation. She had chosen him. Elain had been...thrown at him."

Like Azriel, Lucien wants to be chosen. He's had it before and he sees the value in it. Unfortunately, he's a fae male and he has a hard time ignoring his instincts where his mate is concerned, so he keeps trying. Even though he can hardly stand to be in the same room as her. Whereas Vassa...

Elain, on the other hand, has absolutely no interest in a mating bond. After Graysen breaks her heart in ACOWAR, Feyre says, "Some sliver of hope had been shattered today. That Graysen would still love her, marry her--and that love would trump even a mating bond."

Obviously, that quote is in direct reference to her ex-fiance, but we see Elain reconfirm that desire in ACOFAS when she tells Feyre explicitly that she doesn't want a mate. I don't think it's personal to Lucien, I think she rejects the idea of being told who she should be with. Of being robbed of choice.

We learn from Nesta in ACOSF that their mother always said Elain would marry for "love and beauty". I think for Elain, a mating bond is not the same as love. Also, small aside, but who is constantly regarded as the most beautiful of the bat boys?

We haven't seen them have a conversation about their mating bond yet because why would we? That will happen in Elain's book (which is most likely next).

Gwynriel

I feel like this one is more dangerous to get into so I'll tread lightly.

Firstly, the majority of evidence for this ship comes from a bonus chapter that the majority of the fandom doesn't even know exists. Anyone who listens to the audiobooks doesn't know about it unless they poke around ACOTAR stuff online.

It doesn't make sense for an author to essentially change the entire trajectory of a story in a bonus chapter that most people don't know about.

Also, I think a big problem with the BC is that people read it after they finish the book, so it can feel like the most recent thing to happen in the story, but it's not. It happens about 2/3 of the way through ACOSF and a lot happens after that.

But before we get into that, let's talk about the shadows. People lose their damn minds that Az's shadows dance for Gwyn and vanish for Elain. The truth of it is that we don't know what dancing shadows actually mean, though. It's the first time we've seen it happen. However, we have seen his shadows vanish for someone other than Elain.

In ACOMAF, when Feyre meets the IC for the first time, they vanish for Mor. "Mor patted Azriel on the shoulder as she dodged his outstretched wing...The lurking shadows vanished entirely as Azriel's head dipped a bit."

So we know that the shadows vanish in the presence of someone Azriel has romantic feelings for, but we don't know what makes them dance.

Then, at the end of the BC (after he said he didn't even consider Gwyn to be a friend) he feels a spark of joy in his chest. Good. My shadow man deserves happiness.

But we know that it doesn't last because at the very next training right after Solstice, Neta comments that Az is "More aloof than usual" which clearly shows us that he is far more hung up on what happened with Elain than whatever may or may not be going on with Gwyn.

For her part, Gwyn becomes more comfortable around Azriel after Solstice. We love to see it because the poor girl has been so traumatized and, like Az, she deserves to be happy.

However, at no point does Nesta or Cassian suspect there to be any romantic connection between them. Not like how Nesta did with Az and Elain. ("His secret to tell. Never hers.").

And then at the climax of the book, Gwyn is thrown into the Blood Rite. At no point is Az even half as frantic as Cassian (which a mate would be) and he is way more preoccupied with whatever's going on with Eris.

At the end, when Nesta is getting ready for her mating ceremony, Gwyn tells her that she's not ready to leave the House of Wind again. Poor thing has been re-traumatized because of what happens in the BR and can't stand to leave the House. And y'all think she's ready for any kind of romantic relationship??

Nah, let Gwyn heal without the influence of a male.

Elriel

So I'm got gonna talk about the rescue, him figuring out she's a seer, giving her Truth Teller, or any of the usual stuff because that's been said and said and I have nothing to add to it.

Instead, I want to talk about what I believe their trope will be and share my evidence with the class. Cool? Cool.

Okay, so, I think we all know that if Elriel is endgame then their trope will be forbidden lovers.

Personally, I am of the opinion that the purpose of Az's bonus chapter was to confirm that for us, not suddenly change the entire trajectory of the story.

But forbidden lovers makes so much sense for Elriel because of what we've seen in the books, not just the BC.

Looking at ACOMAF again, Mor tells Feyre, "'Azriel's got no shortage of lovers, though, don't worry. He's just better at keeping them secret than we are.'"

Then, in ACOSF, when Feyre's talking about how Elain figured out she was pregnant first, she says to Azriel, "'I think she's got you beat for secret-keeping'".

So it's already in-canon that Azriel can keep his lovers secret very well and that Elain is just good at secrets in general.

BUT WAIT THERE'S MORE

A moment I never see anyone talk about is something that Cassian observes at a family dinner. "Elain had already departed with Feyre, claiming she had to be up with the dawn to tend to an elderly faerie's garden. Cassian didn't know why he suspected this wasn't true. There had been some tightness in Elain's face when she said it. Normally when she made such excuses, Lucien was around, but the male remained in the human lands with Jurian and Vassa."

Elain already has secrets the IC aren't privy to. So what's one more?

[ganymedesclock]

@krispytalesandwich​ submitted:

I think the fall back down wasn’t what killed the Vessels in the Abyss.

Just a morbid thought I had recently. Ghost doesn’t take fall damage no matter the height they fall which is likely shared with the other Vessels. Why is this morbid?

Because it likely means that the fall wasn’t what killed all those Vessels in the Abyss. The Pale King didn’t just push off every Vessel considered impure, he personally and methodically slaughtered every single one of the thousands of Vessels left rotting in the Abyss. 

Which is likely how Ghost survived in the first place. The Pale King never noticed their presence, not like the Pure Vessel could even tell him, so when they fell back down they were perfectly fine, unlike the thousands before them that failed to meet the king’s standards.

I’m not quite sure how to explain the other Vessels that made it out of the Abyss. Perhaps they failed to make the climb up or the Pale King missed a vital area or two and they managed to survive the fall back down.

So yeah, that was depressing to imagine. Could I get your thoughts on my little theory? 

First:

We see the vessels die in the birthplace cutscene. (this video has the whole thing so I will be using it as reference). It is worth noting that Ghost’s physics make it fairly clear that the vessels, at least the young vessels, are a bit like a porcelain-headed doll with a soft body. (Hollow, as a mature vessel, has a more rigid insectoid shell so seemingly their body hardens as they age, but I digress)

Ghost cracking their mask in any context except Dream No More or Embrace The Void is shown to be fatal. Likewise, when they take damage, we see cracking lines radiating out from their head. Thus, while Ghost does not take fall damage, as you say, the reason why you get hurt when you fall is taking a hard impact- and Ghost takes hard impacts all the time, and is hurt by them.

The vessels that die in the birthplace cutscene fall sideways or upside-down. They land on their heads, which make a cracking sound, and then their body lies still. Likewise, we see the dead vessels in the Abyss, both in present and past, all have cracked masks.

The only way out of the Abyss is a complex and arduous platforming segment full of spikes and shadow creepers. We arrive there with the Monarch Wings, as well as all previous jump upgrades, and use them in the flashback, but in said flashback, Ghost does not have these things. This is why it is possible to jump from the last platform to the bridge with more than enough height to clear it, but, Ghost’s memory is of them barely dangling from the edge. In this way, Ghost’s memory is unreliable- they did not navigate the platform using the monarch wings and mantis claw, because they didn’t have them. This would suggest they had a much harder time, given how they canonically didn’t make the last jump.

To me, all evidence points to the fact that the vessels were killed by this platforming segment. Hollow could thus be thought of as passing a physical trial making it to the top of the platform. I have personally not really liked the idea that multiple vessels made it to the top, and were shoved off- rather, it seems far more likely to me that the vessels did not make it to the top, or almost made it, but, as Ghost did, they fell.

If PK was scrutinizing the vessels’ behavior and shoving off any unworthy, he would be watching Hollow to see if they follow him out without looking back. Which they don’t do- they dawdle, staring at Ghost. If we assume PK’s previous behavior was to observe and kill, it makes no sense that he stopped observing before Hollow had left the Abyss.

Likewise, we also see that vessels are actively falling and dying while PK is speaking to Hollow. But there is no implication that PK is doing anything at that point. When creatures attack or move in this game, they make sounds. We do not hear striking, lashing, or magic sounds, nor do we see unsteady flashes of light punctuating the falling. There is no sound from the falling vessels besides them hitting the ground.

(also, given Hollow was clearly struggling with just seeing Ghost on the platform, I doubt they would stand there and watch PK attack other vessels without reacting- which would have to happen if PK was causing them to fall, because we see vessels falling while he is talking to Hollow)

Second issue with this? Ghost was not spared because PK didn’t notice them.

Because PK was looking backward when Ghost hit the ledge.

It’s very brief, but a distinct beat. He is looking at Hollow, but, it would be very difficult in his line of sight to miss Ghost’s bright white head against the abyss.

Which leads to my third issue:

PK would not systematically act on the vessels- would not hunt them down to kill them all, or mutilate to silence them. Because the primary way we see PK do harm onto other people… is neglect.

PK did not hunt Radiance down with a sword or a spear. He drew her followers away from her and encouraged them to forget, so she would die of more or less divine starvation. Even the vessel project is a more aggressive form of that- it just involves working harder to contain her in one place and force her to wither there.

PK did not chase Ghost or hunt them down. He did not act to cause Ghost to fall from the ledge. He simply left, expected Hollow to follow him, and when they did, he sealed the door, claimed whatever was beyond it was only refuse and regret, even knowing (as he did, because again, it’d be very unlikely he didn’t see Ghost) that some of the vessels were still alive, and Ghost was not the only survivor- other vessels escaped, whether they became Nosk’s prey, or died at Greenpath, or became the Broken Vessel.

When several people who knew PK described him as “fleeing” or “running away”, the implication seems to be that he killed himself. And how did he do this? 

The same way he consigned Radiance to death: sealed inside of a vessel (in his case, a Kingsmould), and rotting away.

So, if PK wants something dead, whether that’s Radiance, vessels, or himself… he seems especially prone to doing so in a very hands-off manner. Even the White Palace, if you think of it as a kind of “boss fight”- PK is not just avoiding you but he’s avoiding anyone. It’s a “to whom it may concern”. He does not actually raise weapon to attack anyone. It’s debatable the extent to which he even set this as a trap to prevent someone else from finding him, or if he did not expect to be found, and left a shining silver no man’s land anyway.

It’s not exactly kinder to the vessels. It’s certainly about as horrifying as cutting them down directly- simply knowing they were there, and could have been saved, and calling it a foregone conclusion anyway and leaving, sealing the door behind him to make this gesture of apathy into an execution.

But I think it’s also that… more than a degree of hatred to PK’s actions, I feel like there is a degree of cowardice. Again, people who were close to him- Ze’mer specifically describes him as someone who couldn’t take the pressure and “fled”. Many characters note that he was extremely reclusive. PK was wiling to do bad things to people, but he seems to have been someone who preferred to avoid confrontations as much as possible.

PK left the vessels trapped, and the environment did the rest. He didn’t have to lift a finger, or, in fact, look at what he did.

[musicfeedsmysoul12]

Because I got called out for being mean when I replied to a comment, and maybe I was: here, the comment.

Hi! Please don’t take this the wrong way, because I mean this kindly. I couldn’t help but think while reading your fic that there was just a lot of black-and-white thinking. A lot of character’s bad traits or mistakes they’ve made were just treated as villainous. Don’t get me wrong, I know some fanfic authors purposefully like to vilify certain characters in order to make their plot work. But it seem to me like it was beyond that for this fic. You’re writing gave me the impression that these characters have done something so wrong in your eyes that they are unredeemable. I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but this holds especially true for most if not all the adults in your fic. Don’t get me wrong, this is not me ‘coming after’ anyone for treatment of certain characters. 😅 In fact, none of characters talked about today are my favorites, so I hope you don’t think that is what this is about. I also do believe that certain characters have done some pretty bad things, such as Endeavor or Bakugou, and that they should atone for their actions. It’s always my belief that if someone has done something bad, the way to make it better is to atone and try to make sure that you don’t repeat the mistake. That’s what second chances are for. I did see hints of that in your fic. I was just curious to see if you’ve realized that you tend to take certain mistakes that people have made and exaggerate them to the point where the characters just seems like a really bad people. It’s all right if you do it in a fic (that’s the beauty of fics—one could do whatever they want with it) but the real issue is if you do it in real life. It’s always good to try to give people the benefit of the doubt and just have general compassion and empathy towards what other people are doing or have done. I guess what I’m trying to say is, you gave me the impression that you’re really strong in your opinions. But people make mistakes no matter what age they are; it’s not really something that you stop doing once you hit a certain age. Which is why understanding why someone made a mistake and believing they could do better it’s important. It’s not just black and white. Some characters aren’t simply angels and others demons. Everyone makes mistakes. People are nuanced. It sucks when someone’s mistake hurts other people. In fact, those are usually the worst kinds of mistakes. That’s why instead of throwing stones at people we should empower them to learn from their mistakes and support them when they try to get better. Anyway, I hope this doesn’t come off it’s too abrupt! I can’t stress enough how much I don’t mean this in a mean way and it’s my sincere hope you don’t take it as such. I just thought I would share my two cents. Nevertheless, thank you for posting the fic. The future-selves interactions were adorable.

My reply:

I normally do not reply this these but to be completely honest: This is one of the rudest comments I have ever gotten, only beaten out by homophobic and transphobic comments. That is why I am replying due to the level of rudeness I see here.

This is a fanfic. You said numerous times that you understand this is a fanfic. Therefore you should understand it is fake. I did not ask for someone to attempt to psychoanalyze me. And you're also so far off the mark. How old are you? Old enough obviously to decide going anonymous might make you look better than using a real account, because this entire comment is ridiculous. But also incredibly young and needing to learn more about life and that fiction does not reflect the writer's reality. It's incredibly patronizing, makes several assumptions and incredibly preachy. I do know about second chances- I have a criminal justice degree specifically in corrections, where we do learn how to help people earn those second chances. This is a fanfic. Not real life.

Next time you want to comment like this, stop and think: has anyone asked you to comment this? Has anyone asked you to preach to them? No? Then don't. This will be my only reply to you.

Was I bitchy? Yes. Should I have responded? No, honestly i shouldn't have and I regretted it but didn't delete it. it's also a guest one so it was even stupider to do so.

Someone then replied to me:

what... the fuck? dude was super nice about his thing, overtly nice honestly, why are you being a jerk about him questioning why you made everyone super mean and rude even when they arent? why even REPLY?! like you could have ignored the post and just moved on. it just seems vindictive and kinda proving the guys point.

-

And now I just feel like shit. I overreacted I know but fuck I'm just... I don't want to be the bigger person. I HATE when people question me about this shit because I try to be a good person and getting shit thrown at me sucks and I hate it and fuck. I hate being told I'm overreacting that people were trying to help- 9 fucking times out of ten they fucking don't actually they just want to fucking feel good about themselves and put others down.

It's fanfiction, what the fuck did I do to deserve the fucking onslaught of someone preaching at me?

I'll probably delete this, but I'm just... I'm so fucking done. I'm done with comments whining about characterization, I'm done with comments about how they feel I'm being to mean. I'm done with people bitching about angst.

I'm just done.

[boydgearloose]

DuckTales Theory: The Rightful Heir of Scrooge McDuck

With the finale on the horizon, I've been thinking a lot about where they could potentially take the whole "rightful heir of Scrooge McDuck who is destined to find the Papyrus of Binding" thing. After rewatching the whole series thus far a few weeks ago, it's been on my mind a lot, and with all the news we've gotten about the finale recently, I've managed to piece something together that I think is pretty plausible. I want to warn you guys right away that this post will have spoilers for the finale promo that was released on Monday, so if you haven't seen it and don't plan on checking it out, please don't read any further! That being said, let's get into this.

For starters, let's look at what we know about the rightful heir to the Papyrus of Binding so far. FOWL is taking all of the missing mysteries and it's included, but they can't retrieve this one on their own. In The First Adventure!, Scrooge wrote that it shall go to "the rightful heir of McDuck" and "that those who attempt to harm any of them will be incapable to getting it." Therefore, nobody in FOWL would be able to retrieve the Papyrus because none of them are Scrooge's heirs and they've all tried to harm him and his family in some way. Another thing to note on the topic of this particular episode, despite being the finale of the show, The Last Adventure! is a clear parallel title to The First Adventure!, where the Papyrus was introduced, so it's likely to be found in the finale.

Now, let's look back to The Split Sword of Swanstantine! At the end of this episode, it's shown that Black Heron has gotten a feather from one of the McDucks for some mysterious reason. Many assumed this would be a cloning situation, where they need to get McDuck DNA in order to replicate a "rightful heir" who hasn't hurt Scrooge or his family in order to get the Papyrus back. However, a lot of the fandom seemed to think it was Scrooge's feather. I personally don't think that is the case. In the episode, we see Heron swipe at all of the children.

She very well could have picked up a feather from one of the kids instead. Of course, the triplets are the first to come to mind because they are essentially Scrooge's heirs, so it would make sense if she was after one of their feathers. But then, I started thinking and realized that none of them really take after Scrooge entirely. Huey primarily looks up to Fenton and Donald (if you're looking for someone inside the family) and leans toward being a superhero/scientist rather than adventurer. We know from the last episode that Dewey wants to be a pilot and has always primarily looked up to Della more than anyone else in the family. Louie you could make an argument for, but he only really admires Scrooge because of his money. He doesn't like adventuring and would rather focus on strategy.

So who could the rightful heir be? Well, there's really only one choice and it fits infinitely better than the rest. I'm very certain that Webby is going to be the rightful heir who is destined to find the Papyrus of Binding. There is a ton of evidence hidden throughout the show since season 1 of this, and I've collected all I could find. I'm sure I even missed some.

First of all, let's get into Webby's character. From her first appearance, she's shown to idolize Scrooge and everything about his family. She's invested in McDuck history and dreams of becoming an adventurer just like Scrooge. In fact, the episode of the series that introduces FOWL way back in season 1 is one that focuses heavily on Scrooge's bond with Webby. There's also the part in A Nightmare on Killmotor Hill! where it's revealed that her perfect dream is quite literally turning into Scrooge. She also believed him longer than the other family members in 87 Cent Solution! There's LOTS of stuff in the show about Webby looking up to him, too much for me to even include in one post.

Season 3 is focused on legacy. We've gotten focus or are getting focus on the legacies of each of the triplets: Huey being a superhero (we could get more of this tbh), Dewey being a pilot and whatever's going on with Louie in the next episode. What about Webby's legacy? Well, it's very clear to me that it lies with Clan McDuck. The last Webby-centric episode we got was The Fight for Castle McDuck!, one that heavily focused on why she's a part of the McDuck family and heavily revolved around getting a placement in it (the whole statue thing). This episode really felt like it was leading up to her ultimate legacy being to follow in Scrooge's footsteps and become a great adventurer. It was also very recent and not counting the Christmas episode which was likely out of production order, the last Webby episode before the finale. (Also, I think it's important to note that the first season 3 episode that heavily focuses on FOWL has a Scrooge and Webby B plot. Just food for thought.)

Another important thing that I just noticed is that in the season 2 finale Moonvasion!, at the end of the FOWL reveal, the camera SPECIFICALLY pans in on Webby hugging Scrooge. This is a deliberate decision, as Webby could have easily been shown with the triplets of Beakley in this scene. But they chose to put Scrooge and Webby front and center.

Another thing to point out is that FOWL's intentions with the feather is obviously cloning, as mentioned before and theorized by many. In the finale for the promo, we saw two new characters with an interesting resemblance to Webby. It's very likely that May and June are the results of them trying to clone Webby through her feather.

However, they don't look exactly like her. Their color schemes and hairstyles are different, and we know by the casting announcement that they have different voice actresses. Therefore, I don't think FOWL has mastered the art of cloning just yet. They need a perfect clone of Webby, and much like Bentley and Buford (who appear to be clones of Bradford, I'm gonna be real), they're like Webby but not exactly Webby. I wouldn't be surprised if they were sent to the lost library for being "rejects," where they're later found by the family, explain why they were created and open up the exposition for The Last Adventure.

How does FOWL know Webby is the rightful heir? I don't know. I don't think we'll be able to determine that until we know more. But I feel like they somehow do and plan on making the perfect clone of her to retrieve the Papyrus before the McDucks are able to. This is a bit of a stretch, but maybe Beakley knows about this too and is keeping it from Webby because it opens her up to danger. Who knows?

And one more thing before we wrap this post up: remember when Frank said something from Last Crash of the Sunchaser! would come up in season 3? That had to be about him stating Webby wasn't family. It could very well be brought up again in the context that Webby isn't only family but the rightful heir of Scrooge McDuck himself!

Anyway, that's about all I have. I'm sure there's more evidence, and if you have any, feel free to respond with it or send it to me via DMs or asks! This will definitely be on my mind until the finale airs LOL

[dr-spencer-reids-queen]

Broken Mirror: Part Three

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Reader

Word Count: ~2k

Warnings: canon violence, canon language, canon talk of death, methods of kill, and angst

Author’s Note: I do not own anything from Criminal Minds. All credit goes to their respective owners. If there is any warnings that exceed the normal death/kills from the show, I will list them. If you’ve seen the show, then it’s the same level of angst unless otherwise stated.

Feedback is gold, and it’s the only currency I take

���Everything will be done by Cheryl. Cheryl will gather the money packets. Only she will touch the money. Cheryl will make the drop. If she is wired or if you use a look-a-like, Patricia dies. Cheryl will get in her car. No one is to be in the car with her, no one is to follow her no air surveillance, and no car surveillance of any kind will be tolerated. I will give directions over a cell phone as Cheryl drives. She must make the drop at exactly 3:00 A.M. She will follow each instruction to the letter.”

The unsub’s message was clear, and Cheryl did just that. She packed the money into one duffel bag, making sure to fill it to the brim with every single stack. Just for good measure, Derek and Hotch were going with her to make sure that everything was in place. The unsub might not do what he says or there could be more than one person so it was smart to take the two agents.

Spencer was hooking the computer up to the GPS in Cheryl’s car so he could track it wherever it went, even if she got lost or the unsub hijacks her in any way shape or form. No matter what happens, Cheryl will be covered in every way there is. As soon as the trio left, you called Derek on his phone just to keep in contact with your teammates.

“Cheryl's car has GPS. We'll be able to track her,” Spencer said as you leaned over his shoulder to look at the computer screen. The phone was close to his mouth so Derek heard every word he said.

“The first thing he's gonna do is have her switch cars. Where are we headed?”

“Where are they headed, Spence?” you asked.

“Let's see,” he muttered, typing on the computer until the map popped up. “An address which appears to be a rental car lot.”

“Keep an eye out and be careful please,” you told Derek right before hanging up. Sighing, you fell into the seat next to Spencer and looked at him with careful eyes.

“What?”

“Nothing, just trying to figure you out,” you muttered to yourself, but he heard you loud and clear. All you could do at this point is wait, but you couldn’t help but notice something odd. Evan’s security team was inside the house, but there was one person who keeps missing all of the action.

“What’s wrong?” the doctor asked, noticing the look on your face.

“Isn’t is kind of weird that Vincent is missing all of this? He seems to disappear right when the calls or something important is happening.”

“You’re right. Where is he?”

“That’s what we have to figure out.”

Just like you predicted, the drop didn’t go as planned. Instead of it being about the money, it was set up as a second kidnapping. Cheryl was almost taken from the car lot if it hadn't been for Derek and Hotch there. The unsub got away, and the first thing they did was bring Cheryl back to her house where she was safe. When her father heard about this, he visibly and emotionally freaked out until he could see her for himself.

“Cheryl’s alright,” Derek assured when the trio returned. Evan immediately went to his daughter who held the duffel bag of cash in his hand. It was never about the money. The phone started ringing and you knew who it was and what they had to say. Everyone headed over to the machine, and you made sure the room was silent before pressing the button.

“That was fun, wasn't it? A little running around and getting our pulses racing. Are you there, Cheryl? Are you there?! Tell me you didn't feel a slight tingle, a thrill run up your spine. Huh? But those clever and cunning FBI agents deduced my little plan just in time. They figured it out. If they hadn't, I would have had you both. The whole set. The matching pair,” the unsub laughed. Looking over at Spencer, you noticed he typed ‘collector’ since he was trying to take notes on the unsub the more he revealed about himself.

“Why are you doing this?” Cheryl blurted out.

“Because you asked me to, Cheryl. You asked me with your glances. The way you talk. Those little gestures.”

Reaching over, you pressed the mute button which only confused the young girl.

“What are you doing?”

“Do not answer this man.”

“You asked for this! You asked for it, Cheryl!” the unsub yelled. She jerked away from you and pressed the button to speak. Derek reached out for her, but she managed to evade his capture at the last minute.

“Cheryl!” Derek hissed, but covered his mouth when the call was unmuted.

“What do you want?” she screamed.

“What do I want?! You! It may not be today, it may not be tomorrow but I promise you, we will be together!” he yelled back and hung up. Sighing, you scratched the back of your neck and looked at Gideon for further guidance.

“We can not let Cheryl speak with him any further.”

“Why not?”

“It's only feeding his psychosis to allow your interaction,” Spencer answered. “Was Trish involved in any serious relationships prior to the kidnapping?”

“With the boy that was killed. They were together for 2 years,” Evan answered.

“Trish didn't want me to tell you. They were getting engaged,” Cheryl sighed.

“Well, that certainly could have been the unsub's stressor,” you pointed out.

“What does that mean?” Evan asked, but nobody answered him. “Will someone please tell me what we're dealing with here?”

“De Clerambault's syndrome, otherwise known as erotomania which is the belief that someone, usually of a higher social status but not necessarily a celebrity, is in love with you. Erotomanics believe that the objects of their affection are subtly professing their love for them through looks, gestures, and glances. The unsub truly and full-heartedly believes that Cheryl and Trish are in love with him. They don't tell him this with their voices. No, with gestures and looks. He's obsessed with them.”

“What does this mean?”

“He’s the most determined kind of criminal,” you stated. “Which is the most dangerous since there isn’t anything that they won’t do.”

“Crime of obsession. Your specialty, your lead, Morgan,” Hotch said from the other side of the room. Leaving the group you were with, you approached the other one to voice your opinion on what should be done.

“I think we should recheck everyone on Davenport's staff against the profile of a stalker,” Derek said once you got there.

“No need. Just do one: Vincent. I don’t like him,” you shrugged.

“That may be, but we need to be open minded here,” Hotch dismissed.

“Aren't stalking behaviors pretty diverse?” Elle asked.

“There's overlap. Narcissistic, inflated sense of self-worth, and history of bad relationships.”

“What do we know so far?”

“He's probably white, and obviously male sophisticated speech patterns.”

“Sophisticated, yet bizarre. He rarely uses contractions. It's not ‘you're’, it's ‘you are’. He’s pretentious,” Gideon added in his two cents. “He wants to sound smarter than he actually is. Whatever position of authority or level of success this guy has, he had to struggle for it.”

“We also have to face the possibility at this point that Trish may already be dead,” Hotch whispered so that Evan couldn’t hear him.

“I don’t feel it, though. She’s close, and I can feel her fear, Hotch. She’s not dead… not yet.”

“You know, so far he's called every play. I say we apply some pressure, make him sweat,” Derek suggested.

“Well, there's only one way to do that,” Gideon smiled. As if on cue the phone started ringing, and everyone gathered around it. Gideon was the one who was in charge here, and he let it ring, and ring, and ring, and ring. Evan was getting impatient and went to answer it, but Gideon interjected him.

“Hold on, hold on, hold on,” Gideon muttered, answering the call but hanging up right away.

“What are you doing?” Evan asked. The phone rang again, and you could sense the anger coming from the unsub through the phone. When the older agent didn’t answer, he tried again. “Agent Gideon.”

“Hello?” Gideon asked once he answered the call.

“Tell me there was a technical issue with the line because if you actually just hung up on m--”

“What the hell are you doing?” Evan screeched. Gideon hung up while the unsub was talking which would surely get him angry enough to reveal something important about himself.

“Are you gonna answer it?” Cheryl asked.

“Why is he doing this? What is he--what--you're gonna drive this guy crazy!”

“Just, quiet. Please, quiet,” Gideon whispered.

“Cheryl, he knows what he's doing,” Elle tried assuring her. The phone started ringing again, but Gideon made no move to answer it.

“Somebody has to answer it!” Cheryl shouted.

“Just answer the phone, for god's sake!” Evan yelled, reaching for the phone. Gideon was on him in seconds because it was important that he doesn’t touch the phone.

“Don't touch it!”

“He knows what he's doing!” Derek held Evan back from touching it.

“Davenport residence,” Gideon finally answered.

“Are you out of your mind? You do realize, you do understand, that I'll kill her?! Do you--”

“You're killing my daughter!” Evan cried. He didn’t understand what was going on, and you were kind of overwhelmed by the amount of emotions that were in the room. The phone started ringing once more, and Evan almost lost it. “Pick up that phone!”

“Get him quiet. Mr. Davenport, get a hold of yourself.”

“Answer the phone!”

“Quiet him!”

“Evan! Stop! Trish isn’t dead! Please, let us do our jobs!” you stated, putting yourself between Gideon and Evan. He could only whimper at this point, and Cheryl was a silent mess all on her own. However, she had Elle there to lean on in case she needed to. Gideon finally answered the phone, but the unsub was the one to speak first.

“She is dead! You hang up on me again, and I rip her open!”

“I'm sorry. You must have the wrong number,” Gideon chuckled, hanging up once more. Evan was a crying mess, but Derek helped him try to stay on his two feet.

“Come on, Gideon,” Derek sighed.

“You killed her.”

“No, he isn’t.”

“Oh, yeah? Then what--what the hell does he think he’s doing?” Evan directed his question at you.

“I'm saving your daughter, Mr. Davenport. Have a little faith,” Gideon answered. The phone rang for the last time, and Gideon gladly answered it.

“Put Cheryl on the phone.”

“No, you're finished talking to Cheryl.”

“Listen to that tone of authority. Just like your published work, agent Gideon. Fascinating to hear the same arrogant quality in your own voice. You are a bit of a pedant, Jason, a bit didactic.”

“Well, that's a very interesting conclusion. You sound intelligent, and you certainly sound educated, but we both know that's not true.”

“Oh, I know all about all of you. The ambitious agent Hotchner? Do you wanna be director of the FBI someday, agent Hotchner? Would you step on Jason Gideon to get there? I think you would. Posttraumatic stress is a very good excuse. Even your sick, pregnant wife can't get you to leave your post.

“Jason Gideon, an expert in the criminal psyche yet unable to diagnose the autistic leanings of the very insecure Dr. Reid. Well, maybe he can make money counting cards in Las Vegas. The lovely Elle was promoted too soon. She doesn't have what it takes to make it in the B.A.U. Boys club. Let’s not forget Y/N and that gift she calls psychic when we all know it’s pure shit! She is overcompensating for something truly terrible, isn’t that right? You're no threat to me, you're no threat to anyone!

“And Token Derek Morgan wants to be taken seriously, but he is just a pumped-up side of beef. I know who you are, I know how you think and I know what to do next! Do you?” the unsub finally finished, slamming the receiver down. Everyone was in shock that he knew this much about you which could only mean one thing…

He was one of you, and you were right.

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[teaboot]

Not to be that person but if someone doesn't want to date anyone, for whatever reason, they don't have to, you're not discriminating against anyone because they happen to not be part of your dating pool as far as you respect their rights and identities

Bluuuuuuuuh okay so this may or may not be a longass post depending on how coherently I can translate the concept in my brain into English words, so apologies in advance.

Okay, so if a dude comes up to me and asks me out, I can say 'no thank you'. That's a thing I am 100% within my rights to do. It doesn't matter if I'm attracted to him or if I'm not attracted to him or if I think he smells bad and it turns me off, it's not important. I am allowed to say no to the king of France, I can say no to Joe Shmoe at the liquor store.

A step further is HOW I say no. Do I say, "no thank-you", or do I say, "ew, no, your face is gross"? One of these answers is polite and concise; the other, no matter how true to me, is something they're going to have to live with. 

For the rest of their life, every romantic interest they pursue, they're going think of that person who told them they were too ugly, and they're going to be ashamed or insecure or embarrassed. Maybe they'll shrug it off eventually, but maybe they won't. Either way, is that the impression of yourself you want to leave on people?

Now the fun question: what if he's a trans guy?

Once again, you can say no. For any reason at all, you can say no. Maybe you aren't attracted to him, maybe he has bad breath, maybe you're new to the concept of gender identity and your fear of somehow fucking up and hurting him is getting in the way right now. For any of these reasons you can say no! But you DON'T GET TO MAKE IT THEIR PROBLEM. 

Saying no-thanks to a trans woman because you aren't attracted to her? Totally fine. 

Telling her "NO, I DON'T LIKE DICK"- that's real sweet. That's something she has to walk away with, now- every time she meets someone she likes and wants to get to know, that person's first thought is going to be about her genitals. She'll never be good enough for anyone because all anyone cares about is her junk.

You're not interested in a trans person? Cool, you don't have to be.

You're not interested in a trans person because you haven't made peace with the reality of trans identities? Obviously not great, but sure, take the time to figure things out.

You've never been interested in someone you knew to be trans, and announce "I NEVER WANT TO DATE A TRANS PERSON"? That's a different statement. That's saying, "There is one defining characteristic that makes all trans people the same, and it's something I find repulsive!" And- Surprise!- THAT is Transphobic. Which is, at it's barest bones- say it with me now- MAKING IT SOMEONE ELSE'S PROBLEM.

And imagine, if you will, dating a lady for a few weeks. She's clever, funny, beautiful, kind- you're head over heels for her, until the very first time you have sex, and you see her vagina. And you think to yourself, "that's an ugly vagina", and break up with her.

If that was a deal breaker for you? Who gives a shit. Some would say it's a bit shallow, but so.long as things break off amicably, life will move on without anybody getting hurt.

Same situation, but you tell her "I can't be with someone who has an ugly vagina!"... Jesus fucking Christ, my guy. What the Fuck. Why the fuck would you tell her that? What on earth made you think your personal aesthetic preferences were more important than her sense of self worth? You entitled jackass. Who died and made you Empirical Minister Of Visually Pleasing Hoo-Has? Why would you SAY that to someone??

Same situation, but she's trans. "This isn't working out for me"? Sure. "I don't know anything about this subject, I don't want to move forwards until I know more"? Hard, but not cruel. "Bye honey, shlongs gross me out"??? WHAT KIND DICKBAG ARE YOU????

And that's kind of what gets me on "Can I say I'm not attracted to genderfluid people?". Because, like... I'd never tell a lesbian, "oh, you aren't attracted to men? Have you met every man on the planet? Sure, sweetie" because, like... Cis men are men all the time. You're attracted to women, whatever. Cool.

But someone who DOES experience attraction to men tells me, "Oh, I'd never DATE one!"- Then I'm sketched out. Because, like.... Why? What do you think all men have in common? You didn't say you weren't attracted to them, just that you'd never date one.

"Oh, I could NEVER date a trans man!"... Why...? The only thing I can conclude is that you're boiling down everything they are to a set of genitals, at which point, fuck, they're probably happier without you.

And by the way, how often do you hear, "UGH, I could NEVER date a CIS woman"? Think about that one for a sec. How does that one feel to a cis lady? Probably pretty shitty. Imagine hearing that from someone you have a crush on. Do you feel outraged? Embarrassed? Maybe you feel disgusting, like someone you admire is repulsed by your body.

Fucking *Ouch,* huh?

SO. Easy rules for not being a dick:

1. If you want to turn someone down, you can, no matter what your reasons are. BUT YOU DO BOT HAVE TO SHARE THOSE REASONS.

2. Their hang-ups are not your responsibility, but YOURS AREN'T THEIRS, EITHER. DO NOT tell someone you can't date them because they look like your mom, just say no and move on! DO NOT tell someone you don't want to have sex because you think their feet are gross, just say no! DO NOT bring up someone's voice or hair or eyes or genitalia, JUST SAY NO! TELLING SOMEONE YOU LIKE THEM IS HARD. BE POLITE, MOTHER FUCKERS.

3. Maybe you're already dating someone you like, and you discover new information that you weren't expecting. Maybe they're trans, maybe they had a hysterectomy, maybe they have a tattoo or a kid or a criminal record, maybe they wear a wig or have a disability or have a rubber duck fetish. Whatever it is, it's an emotional topic and you need space to process. Good! Think things out! If that ends it for you, okay, but none of these things makes someone a bad person or an ugly person or unworthy of love! Don't make them feel that way. Again, your hangups are on you, not them.

4. The next time you go to say something like, "I'd never date a trans guy", or, "I'd never date a black girl", or, "I'd never date a disabled person"- Stop, and think about why you feel that way. What is it about this group of people that you don't like? Is it a real reason, or a stereotype? Is it an aesthetic reason, and if so, don't try to dismiss is as "that's just how I feel". There's a reason. Keep digging for that reason, and once you find it, figure out if it's a belief you want to hold onto. Always ask yourself "why?". Never let yourself fall into the belief that any group is worthy of wholesale dismissal.

5. Breathe. Stay calm. You're not a bad person. Society has programmed us with a lot of biases- it's not your fault you have them, but it isn't a free pass to remain ignorant and hurt others. Be gentle with yourself, but be willing to reflect on your feelings and behaviors and rein in the ones that are harmful. No matter your feelings, at least be kind. We're all trying our best, and we all just want to be loved. Keep that in mind.

Anyhow, that's just my two cents. I hope this wasn't too winding or rambly, I'm still working out my thoughts on the matter myself. Being genderfluid doesn't make me an expert on trans issues, and I certainly don't have the experience to speak further.

If there are any corrections to be made, please let me know. Always learning!

Please take care.

[ep-review]

WEARABLE PUMP COMPARISON

If you're looking for a comparison of these, you are in luck because I have tried all three. I started off with the Willow, went to the Momcozy next, then ended up with the Elvie. Let's get started.

*************

WILLOW

Best point: they are leak proof.

Caveat: only leak proof if you are using bags, which will run you 50 cents each at retail price. Expensive.

Reusable milk containers?

These are sold separately, and will cost $50 for a pair. They are a little finicky and hard to clean and dry. The valve at the top must be completely clear of debris, or you'll get an orange pump light error.

Pros?

Can process milk quickly (great for fast or heavy letdowns), suction is very strong. Some people may find that it is too strong.

Cons?

Bigger, heavier, and louder than the Elvies. You can't change suction power in the app, you must use the buttons on the unit. You also cannot adjust milk volume afterwards if it marked volume incorrectly. All in all the app is very non-functional.

Most encountered errors and problems?

I get the feeling that the most common error is encountered right before you want to start the pump. An orange light will turn on at the top of the pump, and it will refuse to start. You'll have to figure out if there is something blocking the valve, or if your magnets are not lined up correctly, or whatever before you can get the session started. Once you start, it's golden. But it can sometimes take a while to get started as you take the pump apart and put it back together to try to get it to begin. I've also seen some people have issues with the hub cracking, which may or may not affect function. The good news is that Willow will replace your hubs if they are under warranty.

*************

ELVIE

Best point: they are the most discreet.

Smaller, lighter, and quieter than the Willow.

Storage bottles?

The bottles at the bottom of the hubs come with lids, and can be used for storage. Make sure you clean the lids well, there have been instances of mold growing underneath the silicone ring. I take them apart completely at least once a week for a good deep clean (use a toothpick to take the rings out, and put them back in by putting them in place then screwing it onto a bottle).

Pros?

Like I mentioned before they have a smaller profile, are lighter, and quieter than the Willow pump. The suction is quite gentle, and is said to mimic a baby's suckling. You can buy a single or a double pump, which is nice. The app is pretty good. You can change from stimulation to expression and increase suction power all in the app.

Cons?

They cannot process a fast letdown - it might leak or lose suction. Elastic nipples may have issues using the flanges as is, since the flange tunnel is shorter and suction holes are located halfway in.

Most encountered problems?

Leaking. If you have a fast flow or aren't standing/sitting upright, milk might leak between the bottle and the hub. This is the most frustrating problem. Other problems include loss of suction caused by milk backing up behind the green disk or elastic nipples blocking the suction holes. Many users purchase cushions or inserts to mitigate these issues, but find that these items need to be trimmed before they will work with these pumps.

*************

MOMCOZY

Best point: they are inexpensive when compared to the other two!

The Momcozy pumps will run you around $110 for a pair of two (be sure to look for discount codes!). This is significantly cheaper than the Elvie or the Willow which retail at $500.

Pros?

Simple, no-nonsense, they just work. No finicky parts. They basically are handsfree cups attached to their own motor. Easy to use and basically no learning curve - just pop them on and go. You can also just buy one. The freemie and maymom inserts work with the flanges without cutting. The flange is entirely made of silicone. I consider that a pro because it's so comfortable!

Cons?

I think the biggest con is that they are not discreet. The motor is a large block at the top of each unit and sticks up. The shape doesn't look boob like at all. There's also no app, if you care about that at all (I didn't). But if you're strictly interested in using these at home, why would you need to be discreet? You'll probably have to charge these every 2-3 pump sessions or so.

Most encountered problems?

I didn't have any problems with this personally. Not sure what problems it could really have, it's a very basic, functional unit.

*************

SUMMARY

Price: Momcozy

Momcozy is cheapest, running about $110 for a pair (with coupons), or you can buy them separately at around $60. Elvie and Willow will cost you $499 at retail.

Weight: Elvie

The Elvie is the lightest, followed closely by the Momcozy. The Willow is by far the heaviest unit. However, the Momcozy is a bit top heavy due to the location of the motor. Wear a bra with greater coverage if you need more support.

Suction

It's hard to judge a winner in this category because they are different. Willow is known for having extremely strong suction, and the Elvie is known for being quite gentle. The Momcozy doesn't get as gentle as the Elvie, but also doesn't get as strong as the Willow. But not everyone needs the same suction level so this is quite a personal thing.

Flange sizes

The Willow pump comes in 21mm, 24mm, and 27mm standard flanges, with only one size in the box. If you think you may need 21mm and buy from their website, you will also get the 24mm included in your purchase. (Technically the pump kits come only in 24mm and 27mm, so if you tell them you want 21mm they just throw it in for free.) The Elvie comes with 24mm and 28mm standard flanges, and both of these are included in the box. If you need 21mm, these will need to be purchased separately. The Momcozy comes only in 24mm flanges, but you can buy 27mm flanges separately on their website.

Inserts

To resize the flanges for a better fit, there are freemie and maymom inserts which will work with the 24mm flanges. In the case of the Willow and the Momcozy, most users find that they work without issue. With the Elvie pump, the suction hole comes halfway up the flange tunnel so the inserts usually need to be trimmed before they will work correctly with the pump. Some people find that they work as-is, however, so I'd advise that you try them without trimming first to see if you need to.

Volume: Elvie

The Elvie is the quietest, followed by the Willow and then the Momcozy.

Discreet: Elvie

The profile of the Elvie is smaller - the Willow is larger. Obviously the Momcozy, with the huge motor, is not really discreet as all.

Tunnel Length: Willow/Momcozy

If you have elastic nipples, the Willow and Momcozy have longer flange tunnels than the Elvie and will accommodate longer nipple stretching. The flange tunnel of the Elvie is quite short, and some people with elastic nipples find that they lose suction because their nipple blocks the suction holes. Using inserts/cushions can help mitigate this issue.

Parts: Willow

The Willow pump, if you use bags, has the least amount of parts to clean. The Willow container on the other hand, is difficult to clean and I'll tell you why - if you're handwashing most of the time, like me, the nooks and crannies at the top of the container are small and I can barely fit a finger in there to scrub it. I found the Flextubes to be annoying to clean as well because I could not fit a finger in. On the other side, the Elvie and Momcozy pumps do have way more parts, but I found that the parts are much easier to clean. The only part you need to break out a nipple brush for is really the duckbill.

Ability to handle milk flow: Willow/Momcozy

The Elvie is notoriously bad for a quick letdown or fast milk flow. If your milk comes out too fast, the Elvies will either leak or lose suction because excess milk gets sucked behind the disk. The Willow and Momcozy pumps can take much higher speeds.

Cup Volume: Momcozy

The Momcozy cups each holds 180mL/6oz of milk. The Willow and Elvie say that they each hold 4oz in their cups, but from experience - the Willow bags can hold much more (if you pump with the bags outside). I've heard of someone pumping 8oz into a bag once. On the other hand the Elvie probably holds a bit less than 4oz because it tends to think there is more milk than there actually is in the bottle which leads to the pump pausing itself. If you fill any of these cups you'll have to pretty much take off the pump and empty it to keep pumping again. The Willow and Elvie shut off automatically. The Momcozy does not.

App: Elvie

You can go from stimulation to expression as well as adjust suction levels directly in the app. And after the session is over, you can edit the milk volumes if the ones recorded are incorrect. Elvies app also has its own performance metrics which is fun to look at that describes your milk flow and total pumped volumes. On the other hand, the Willow app is very basic and just functions as a record of your pump times and volumes (which is frequently off) and you cannot edit them afterwards. Obviously Momcozy loses in this because there is no app at all.

Battery

It's hard to compare the pumps because the higher your suction, the faster the battery life runs out. From their respective websites, the Willow pump says a full battery lasts "about 5 pump sessions" and the Elvie says it lasts "about 2 and a half hours". Just comparing the two from my own experience subjectively, the Willow pump has a slightly longer battery life than the Elvie, but obviously it totally depends on how strong you set the pumps to work. The Momcozy has the poorest battery life by far. At the lowest suction and 20 minute sessions, I found it only lasted about 3 sessions.

Chargers

The Elvie hubs come with 1 charging cord each, so if you buy the double you'll get two. Same thing with the Momcozy. Both of these are USB chargers so you'll need a block to go with (they don't come with that). Unfortunately the Willow only comes with one charging cord (which plugs into a standard 2 prong outlet) when you buy two hubs which is such a weird decision in my mind. But I found I could just alternate which one I charged and it was fine.

Warranty: Elvie

I feel like this is an important topic that doesn't get compared too often. The Elvie pump hubs have the most generous warranty of 2 years from the date of purchase. On the other hand, the Willow comes with a warranty of 12 months from date of purchase. Because these are intended to be single user products, the warranty doesn't transfer from one person to the next if you purchase second hand. Therefore, this should be something you consider if you are doing so. Both companies - Willow and Elvie - cover the washable pump parts for 90 days. The Momcozy on the other hand - their website says that all items are covered by a 30 day warranty which I assume applies to the pumps as well.

BOTTOM LINE:

There is no perfect pump. Each of these three have their own issues. However, if the pump can't extract your milk, then it is useless to you. You need to know what to prioritize before making the commitment and I suggest prioritizing things that affect milk extraction, like suction power, tunnel length, and the ability for the pump to handle your milk flow speed.

If you have any other questions please let me know! :)

[kastlenetwork]

Forgive me if you're getting this Ask twice-- I couldn't tell if it went through the first time. Thank you for agreeing to help me! I am a grad student working on a literacy learning project in which I need to immerse myself in a form of literacy that I do not have experience in. I am a reader of fanfiction and a huge fan of Kastle, so I decided that I would write my own Kastle fanfic. Would you and the Kastle community share with me what you as readers typically look for in a Kastle fanfic?

The first one did send through, but it’s totally okily dokily! I would also like to preface this by saying I was just sat here and I’d answered with this with an actually not horrific response and then my laptop died out of absolutely nowhere, :) without warning :) [which happens all the time, because my computer is dying in general, but still I’m miserable about the loss lololol anyway] – so, this one isn’t as well thought out.

I’m just gonna say that the main thing that I look for in Kastle fanfiction is close to canon characterization. We’re all different people with different eyes and ears and brains, so when we watch the show, obviously different things might stand out or feel more prominent in who they are, than other things to other people. So, I’m not bothered by different headcannons or anything like that. I mean, it’s fanfiction, that’s the point – I’m reading it to read that writers’ take and have a good time……or a bad time, depending on if the writer is trying to squeeze out hearts lolol. But, there’s a general base line for who the characters are that has to be met for me to really get attached to what I’m reading. I’m this way for any fanfiction for any couple, to be honest. But, it’s super prominent when dealing with Karen and Frank, for whatever reason. If they stray too far away – their characterization, their vibe, their dialogue – I start to slowly check out of what I’m reading. I might just flat out stop. And if they’re in a Different Scenario where one doesn’t want to focus too heavily on the heavy, how that’s adjusted to fit the more lighthearted piece.

I mean, take Frank for example. If I open a fic and he spends the entire thing absolutely miserable with no small bright spots, at all, that’s just as off-putting to me as him being some weird happy sunshine man. Because, Jon’s Frank Castle (and that’s all I can go on on Frank, at all, honestly. I’ve never read a TP or DD comic lol whoops) finds things amusing. I mean, he’s literally lying in a bed having a deal worked out for him to go to prison in Gen. Pop. and he’s making jokes about it. Karen’s screaming out at him that refusing to cooperate with her and his lawyers, so that they can help him, will do nothing but result in him failing to get answers to about his family and have him rotting in a cell. And his immediate response could be more misery and more doom and gloom, but instead he’s turned on impressed and amused by Karen’s outburst. He admires the blunt and fearless goddess before him the honesty and the blowup and he teases her choice of wording. He’s light in a moment where she literally just said the results of his actions might be that he never learns the truth and he’s taking delight in her explosion despite it. 

Yes, he’s angry. He’s violent. He’s depressed. But, sometimes he talks about his family and he’s smiling. He’s laughing. Does it more than likely melt back into his ever present grief? Absolutely. But, it doesn’t mean that show of levity isn’t there. And Karen’s character and characterization faces a similar path in the show, just in the flipped direction. The core of her is built around something traumatic and sorrowful, but her general demeanor is positive and determined. 

Frank is funny. Karen is funny. Frank is sad. Karen is sad. 

They’re feeling a lot of things at various times.

So, the main thing I look for in Kastle fic is the appropriate balance of that. If I feel like it’s too far off the mark, I more than likely won’t finish it. 

The second thing I look for ties directly into the main thing, which is simply the dialogue. How they talk to each other. Especially once it’s starts bleeding further into the actual romance aspect of the story and not just the build up. Frank’s not adverse to endearment – he’s obviously someone that cares EXTREMELY DEEPLY for those he loves. (To the detriment to the gangs of New York). And we’ve seen him call Leo “sweetie” and stuff, this sweet little girl that he gets a big soft spot for. But, we’ve also seen him talk about his wife on multiple occasions and give big romantic speeches about his wife, like when he and Karen were on a date sitting in the diner. He calls her “my old lady” and he says he would literally chop his arm off at the table if he could just have another moment with her and feel what he thinks Karen must feel for Matt (*coughs* k sure, Frank) and it’s all really depressing ‘cause he’s destroyed, but he and Karen are on their date wow what a date sitting there and he’s talking about love and it’s just such a good moment. 

He’s not gonna call Karen the things he called his wife, obviously, unless they’re general terms of endearment. But, I think it’s a good example of the way he talks. I look for as close to canon characterization on the way they speak. Like, if Frank starts calling Karen his “beloved” it’s suddenly not Frank anymore – it’s some guy who happens to be as hot, but there’s been a mind swap or something. If Karen’s calling Frank “sugar plum” I’m kind of scratching my head, because who’s that blonde lady that’s suddenly speaking, what’s going on?

And I think the final thing I look for is simply that Karen is given more agency in terms of the relationship they’ve got. Because, in TP1 and TP2, it’s very much Karen who’s standing there with her arms flung open going, “I want you to be in love with me, like I know you are! I see you pushing it away! I am in love with you! You are allowed to love and have a life! Have a life with me!!!!!” And then Frank basically trying to push her back to Matt for literally no reason. I think a part of this is just Frank himself in his constant sabotage mode, because that’s his entire life after his whole family was murdered. He’s on destruction path, even when he’s trying, in moments, to get out of it. But, I ALSO think part of it is just that they didn’t have Karen for the full season, either season, and, even before they knew Marvel Netflix was heading to the grave, the shows refused to appropriately connect and were instead taking the ’’’easier’’’ path. Because, it was made pretty clear that they’d put her in the whole show if they could, but only could get her for so much time, and they wrote for that time.

So, in fic, I look for Karen getting to have her feelings actually be on display, instead of just being there to bounce his feelings off of, because they didn’t have her for enough time in either season to go more deeper on her end, since she wasn’t actually their character. And for her to get to have more agency in what’s going down with all that wanting them to be in love stuff just feels crucial to me, at this point, seeing as Marvel refuses to just make my dreams come true and announce that they gave a shit about these shows and are bringing them into the fold with the same casts.

Other than those two things, which I consider to be fairly standard, and that one thing where it’s just my exhaustion with my girls always having to fix everything – I’m pretty open to anything in terms of actual story. (I’ll even read a pregnancy/baby fic if it’s well written – and I’m…adverse to fanfic about babies). I just want an appropriate balance of their individual traumas to the sass master’s that live inside them and appropriate dialogue to who they are as people.

(I’ve got a whole thing about what I look for in a fanfic in general, but it’s not specific to Karen and Frank – it’s just like….spaces and pacing, which doesn’t have much to do with this.)

\\\\

What do you all look for in Kastle fic?! Help @chaiteacookiesnglitter out and reblog this and put in your two cents about what you’re inherently looking for. :DDD

[janiedean]

Hey ! I know you've said maaany times that you're sure Theon will survive the series and I used to think so too but... I'm super worried now. Do you still feel confident in his survival after seeing this week's episode ? It seems a lot to me like he's going to die defending Bran... as much as I hate it :///

K everyone I’m using this as the ‘my round up long-ish post about Why I Think Theon Doesn’t Die Especially In Next Episode’ xD

narrative sense part one: or better, you can tell me ‘when has this show ever had narrative sense since s3′ and I could say ‘well you got me’, but let’s assume that this season has to lead to an endgame that can’t be too far from the books. now: theon is hardly the most popular character out there and we can say that most of the audience isn’t in it for him. now, if they wanted to kill him when everyone hated him to have another joffrey then they had S3 to do it, or S4. if they wanted him to die in order to redeem himself for harming the starks well he could have died saving sansa in S5 which would have made audience sense because oh hey we hated that guy until a moment ago now he saved sansa OH FUCK HE DIED JUST WHEN I LIKED HIM!!, snap. instead..... hey, it’s S8 and he’s still around and he’s in the north (where he is in the books in which he’s gonna have sansa’s sl or 80% of what she got in the show I think), doing what he wants, taking his decisions, *defending the starks* and having figured his identity issues out (not as well as I’d have liked but whatever), to the point where they all forgave him and sansa is spending her last possible night on earth having dinner with him. okay, he can die, but.... what’s the point?

 narrative sense part two: euron is a goner. yara got saved and good for her, but out of all the ironborns, theon is the only one who’s been around since S1 and yara is off to the iron islands most likely to not be seen again until they need the cavalry or until the ending episode because hey we established the zombies can’t get to the islands. it makes literally zero sense for them to kill of the only main ironborn character that’s been there since 1x01 after getting him to a place where the audience actually likes him or doesn’t hate him that much anymore when euron is def. dying and yara is a tertiary character. the audience isn’t invested in yara greyjoy queen of the iron islands that much, but it can be invested in theon greyjoy reconciling with the starks and doing the good thing. like, he’s the main character in that area, killing him off means that then they have only yara to rely on and she’s off in the islands in that sense, how do they talk to her? who calls her fleet? who contacts her?

next episode: actually theon hasn’t had the chance to show off that he actually can fight and so on since what, s2. now he’s back in the fold, with flame arrows, after 8x01 where he did the badass rescue thing, and I’m supposed to think he dies when he’s finally getting into the last stretch? improbable.

next episode, part two: theon says he’ll protect bran, good. which means that bran is on a wheelchair, in the godswood, at the mercy of whatever zombie shows up. so, counting that whatever red shirt ironborn theon brings with is way most likely to die because they won’t have bran stark, main character and narratively part of the top three Most Important Characters In These Series, saved by the ironborn red shirt, then theon has to actually defend him. if he dies defending him and they’re on the outside, bran is still toast because who defends him from the next zombie showing up? if theon has to actively save bran’s life either he shoots dead the zombies or at some point bodily drags him inside the crypts or the castle or somewhere but like he has to be alive for that. also if he actually delivers on it he gets full-on narrative redemption - he said it, I took your castle let me defend you, so if now he actually saves him he can have the narrative redemption for that and actually enjoy it, so... again, looks improbable.

last point which I wouldn’t have brought up before 8x02 and I’m putting my hands forward saying that it’s not my ship (because of the endless issues I have with S5 and how they handled their interactions in that season and how they chose to work with the repercussions later) and I have zero involvement in the ‘who does sansa stark end up with’ bingo on this show and I like to think I’m talking objectively: out of every single guy who showed up in the first two episodes in sansa’s orbit, and out of the *main characters*, he was the only one she seemed genuinely happy to see, the only one she had emotional scenes with and the one she chose to spend her possible last night with, while her sister was off having the bang of her life (hopefully the first and not the last) with the man she loves/she’s been into for a while, while jon was... well, talking to daenerys who as it is, is the person he’s supposed to be in love with not counting the incest debacle, and everyone else was having pseudo-emotional moments (I mean jb didn’t kiss but they got that close and they’re obv. endgame same as arya/gendry).......... aaaand......... I’m supposed to think there’s nothing underneath? I mean everyone and their walls knows that it’s not my ship when it comes to either of them but obviously show!sandor/sansa is not gonna happen at this point and I made peace with it a while ago and given how it went with her and tyrion at this point theon seems to be a way more likely candidate if she has to end up with someone nevermind that well admittedly if they ended up together they’d close the stark/greyjoy rift........... aaand.... he’s dying?

I mean. he could because who trusts anyone anymore when it comes to d&d and whatever but I still think that if they really wanted him dead for shock value or redemptive value they had S3 and S5 to do it. and they didn’t. and he’s still around even if he’s not a character the audience has this much investment into which means they could have killed him off and spared alfie’s paycheck a long time ago. they still didn’t. so my two cents are that he’s definitely surviving for points 1-4 and if he’s sansa’s endgame then it’s reaaally not gonna happen and I said what I said. if I’m wrong peace I’ll cry and deal with it but I like to think I have my sound reasons to think he’s not a goner. ;)

[youdontloveme-yet]

Time to put my two cents out there. Wholeheartedly agreeing with everything said so far in this post, let me add some things.

First of all, the police thing is stupid to even point out. If y'all woke kids out there put those braincells to work for a bit, you maybe would've noticed that in the majority of BL's where there is a crime or something similar, almost never (with very few exceptions) is the police involved. So, from here, if we had some critical thinking skills maybe, we could realize that, idk, the police in Thailand ain't who you turn to. I am baffled, because it is an incredibly clear pattern. Another thing is that this year specifically we have gotten more than one series about how the system is corrupt and should not be trusted on any account. So, the whole thing with involving the police seems very much out of place. Look, idk how the situation in Thailand is with the police, because I haven't experienced it firsthand, but all these screenwriters and authors obviously are more than in the know about the topic, if it's continuously being pushed up in shows. Also, if you were fucking interested in what is happening in the world, you'd probably know about the 2020-2021 protests in Thailand. Thus, maybe get some insight on why they never turn to the police in your shows.

Leaving this aside, I would like to point out that this is no way the West and trying to implement your ideals and understandings here would lead to nothing. I think it is time some of you understand that not everything works the same way as it does in your country. Another thing is that a lot of SA victims can tell you that contacting the police does not always work. (if ever) Especially if someone's attacker is rich and/or has a lot of connections. The police won't do shit. So, miss me with that shit. Not to mention that there isn't a fucking country in this world that has not had issues with corrupt police.

The thing with therapy is also not black and white as some of y'all are trying to make it out. First of all, we don't know if Sky went to therapy - it is not mentioned, but it is not denied either. It is fiction, it has been left to your imagination to decide, if he went to therapy or not. Second, therapy does NOT help everyone. Therapy is NOT for everyone. Some people go to therapy and come out much worse than they were. Third, finding a good therapist, that will not just put you on anti-depressants is difficult. Finding a person who you click with is also extremely difficult. Those who say that therapy is the answer either got lucky with a therapist or have not gone to fucking therapy, yet still speak up.

Another thing I would love to add, and will probably get hate for, is that some of you who are so spoken about SA are not even survivors, just trying to advocate. Honestly, I don't mind, advocate for whatever you want really, the support is always appreciated, but some of you need to shut up. Stop trying to make fantasy real. And you are not even trying to make it real, you are majorly distorting and molding the reality into some utopian type of world, that may exist only in some of y'alls heads. I don't think that you realize that going to the police and through therapy is one of the things we do not want to remember as well. Going from a station to station, giving statements, people touching you where they touched you in order to examine you, then you have the incredibly nice ordeal of going to court where you meet your fucking assailant. And you're gonna be seeing their disgusting existence for as long as the case goes on. So, please for the love of anything out there, shut your fucking mouth. Stop trying to turn fantasy into reality. I prefer my fantasy laced with dark, difficult topics and how to live with them, rather than be hit by reality on every turn. This is getting fucking ridiculous.

as far as we know, prapai does NOT have trauma training. he knows sky has been through SOMETHING when prapai first starts pursuing him, and so far, he's just been trying his best with his gut instincts as a guide. yes, sky has severe trauma, but that doesn't mean that the person he ends up with should automatically have had cbt training and a degree in psychiatry. prapai tries to handle sky with care, and everyone is just doing their best here

[freeenergytech-blog]

Bedini SG - Open the gap for faster RPM

okay so right now the fan is off at full speed with the fan it's only ten our p.m. slower so that really doesn't slow it down very much all I want to show here is basically I just made the gap just a little bit bigger and it lets you breathe a little easier and so it can actually get up to faster speed by itself I mess with the this just a little bit these are little bushings because these collars are actually too big to fit inside that hole so these little plastic bushings about you know 50 cents apiece can slip over and hit the bearing race and this can slide over and then push that that way it's not going to move out I just took them off for right now because the way this is all mounted it'd everything this is not gonna pull apart like that you know even if you need to pull it apart it'll settle right back down like this so that's not an issue the gap seems to be the main thing it just had to be open up just a little bit gets up to that speed so I just want to show that and show the difference in the RPM because the fastest I was getting was about 250 rpm actually 248 when I did this it's up to about 275 this is the input battery here interesting at twelve point six three twelve point six four it's I've drawn from this battery let it drop come back up off and on a few times so this is probably a little bit fluffy at the top my gonna settle down in this 12.2 twelve point three range the output battery this has been sitting for quite a few hours and it's a twelve point seven seven obviously this battery is charged so I'm not trying to charge the battery I just want to show that this will speed up on its own without me having to flick it and we'll do a little rpm calculation okay so super make sure it's all hooked up here so you can see the double little double triggering and that smoothes out as it gets up to speed they're starting to come in to speed there and it's running quite a bit smoother it's still got a little little wobble there but you can see that thing is really taking off pretty good still speeding up actually got it up to 100 cycles a second okay so right now we're at about 93 94 95 I did get it to like 102 103 I think that's when the battery was a little bit more charged up on the front you know twelve point two seven was fifteen so anyway I'm just gonna say 95 cycles a second and so if we take 95 cycles a second as how many times an event is happening per second and if we multiply that by 60 seconds we're going to 5,700 cycles per minute and in one minute you know so if we take that if we divide it by 21 magnets around the wheel because 21 cycles is one rpm is one rotation okay so divided by 21 that's 271 and so that beats 248 just about 25 rpm almost faster so that's significant you know that's it's gonna have even a little bit less draw in the front a little bit more recovery a little bit more mechanical because of a faster speed so I'd recommend just cut you know kind of play with the gap you want to close you don't want it too close sort of kind of blah get a little bit and if it's too far you're gonna have to you know spin the heck out of that will to get enough induction in there to even trigger it and if it's too far it's not going to get fast enough you're not you're going to lose too much mechanical so you're going to kind of play with the sweet spot there luckily on this particular kit you can loosen these three bolts on both sides drop it down or up to adjust the gap exactly where you want it so you know I'm within pretty much about where it's going to be the fastest and I don't know that might be about third of an inch or something but you can hear that the Pulsar dududududu sorts it's been pretty good but these are just slightly not perfectly straight so be you know sub else can mess with but in any case just wanted to show you that it does speed up to that by itself without me having to flick it as a matter of opening the gap a little bit and that was kind of the main thing but anyway but I'm pretty sweet they're at a ninety five cycles a second you know so where I got the scope basically as negative is on a primary negative and I got the probe on one of the transistor collectors you know that's the end of the wire that comes into the collector so basically at the you know so-called bottom of the coil that's waveform is gonna give me and it's in that event this happening ninety five times per second so you got to calculate that by sixty Seconds to get how many times it's happening in a minute then divide it by how many magnets you got on the wheel and that's going to tell you your RPM so anyway you okay real quick I put the fan on I just wanted to show you the difference in the RPM with that on there run a little bit slower I mean I calculated earlier about 10 rpm different difference with the fan so it doesn't slow down significantly and it is giving you know blowing air that's just showing that it's doing some mechanical work besides just spinning the wheel slows it down a little bit you don't want it to run you know too too fast but uh anyway this is in honor of the original bicycle wheel SG that John had built quite a few years ago so anyway it's gonna speed up a little bit slower and I'll just show the RPM what you hear that you know it's you spun it fast enough to induce enough to trigger it that's the input battery fair enough you can hear it speeding up it's definitely speeds up slower because of the extra weight but then it shifts gears single event per trigger 82 cycles a second they 8990 things coming along pretty good yeah you get a pretty good breeze there got 91 almost 92 so we'll say ninety one point six it's actually above that but so you ninety one point six so ninety one point six sixty divided by twenty one magnets to sixty one you know so we're right there at about ten rpm difference not really significant there Oh 23 it's coming along pretty good actually the fan that kind of damn dampens that uh-oh asymmetrical pulse or that a centricity to do to to voice leave the fan on run it that way so anyway focus on the gap raise it up and down you can find your sweet spot where it's gonna be running in the fastest and coming up soon I'll clear all this stuff off I'll bring my laptop in the western mountain radio manufactured battery load tester where you can that we can actually put on the output battery draw a calculated load down at the seat an RC 20 rate show it on a graph and everything so you know exactly what came out of it okay in terms of watt hours so you can calculate the jewels in versus jewels out you can monitor the input battery and see the discharge graph on that got some tests that I've kind of mentioned for many years nobody ever took it serious or took me up on it but uh we're gonna be demonstrating that and not gonna talk about it until until we do it once I'm satisfied that this is running house I want it I also got to get bigger wires these are just real thin little junky alligator clip wires I want to wire at least probably about that thick connected to one of these with a good clamp to hook to the batteries because you want as low of an impedance as possible probably going to tell the big difference just on this like 15 watt type system or whatever but uh I do want bigger cables than this are real good connections so anyway that'd be the only other thing that I'd really do to this increased connections then I'll be showing some tests and we'll show some what the reality is to this you

 Guild to build your own Bedini SSG energizer