#obviously i voted remus

[eevylynn]

The answer would honestly depend on a lot of different variables.

What are we talking here: 1v1, 2v1, 3v1

Would they all be at school aged or at the point that each died?

What kind of fight are we talking about here? Friendly sparring? Duel to the death? Muggle fighting? Do they all hate each other in this scenario? Are they all friends still? Or is this like afterlife schenanigans?

Are we strictly going by canon personalities and skillsets? Or is this some non-canon fanon verse where their personalities aren't quite in line with the books?

While James surely has the skill, he doesn't have much in the way of bloodlust when it comes to his friends, even if they did end up on the other side of the war. He would definitely hold back. He's also a tad overconfident in his abilities and lacks "constant vigilance"

Sirius has reasonable skill and a helluva lot of swagger to back it up. It's probably why so many people are voting for him, to be honest. He definitely has enough bloodlust to do it, EXCEPT when it would come to fighting James. Also, Sirius honestly doesn't have a good canon track record when it comes to dueling. He lost to Peter Pettigrew. Yeah, he was grieving, but still...

Remus's skillset is honestly probably about the same as James and Sirius, he's just less showy about it and more willing to talk his way out of the situation before lifting a wand. At most, he's slightly less powerful than James and Sirius. He's also insanely fast at the draw once he's willing to fight. (I'd probably put him and James at about the same in speed, given James' chaser reflexes) What really gives Remus an edge over the above two, though, would be his utter ruthlessness. I don't know if it's his werewolf side, but once Remus has written you off, that's it. Good bye.

Peter. *sigh* Technically, he beat all three at one point or another. (In a backhanded way, but beaten nonetheless) That being said, whether or not he would win in a 1v1 fight with the James and Remus would 100% depend on the situation at hand. (He canonically beat Sirius. That is not a question) Peter is NOT as skilled at dueling as the other 3. However, he's just as much a Slytherin as he is a Gryffindor, and he'll use what he can to win. He is not afraid to use underhanded techniques to ensure his survival, no matter who he's going up against.

[atlasdoe]

i get the feeling that it's like an ensemble kind of story but who's the main main character?? like how archie andrews is the main of riverdale and how aria was the main in pretty little liars (but that quickly changed to spencer)

you get what i mean?? like who's the MAIN main bitch??

(btw i put in the marauders lily regulus and severus cause they're the ones we know the most about in cannon and are in my opinion the main "cast" of the fandom and most well known)

[chlobliviate]

Wolfstar Microfic - Trophy Room

Words: 983

@wolfstarmicrofic

🌙✨🌙✨🌙

James had dragged them all down to the trophy room the day after the Quidditch Cup final, just so they could see his name on a shiny trophy. Sirius had told him the day before, that he’d already seen James’ name written on a lot of things, so he didn’t see the point. Upon seeing that James was a little hurt by that, he promised to go with them and ooh and ahh in all the right places. Pete was keen to go the whole time and Remus would obviously drag himself away from the book he was currently engrossed in, just to make James happy.

It turned out to be fairly anticlimactic. It was just the quidditch cup trophy he'd seen hundreds of times, now with ‘Gryffindor 1976’ written on it, but the shield, declaring James as captain of the winning team, among the shields of decades of prior winners, was pretty cool.

“It’s kind of weird how there are sports trophies, but there’s no art trophies, or congrats you’re really adept at herbology trophies. Or even kindness or bravery trophies. Why do we only give out trophies for sport?” James met Remus’ eye as Sirius continued. “Would it be so terrible for Dumbledore to announce the person with the best grades each year, or, I don’t know, the person who brewed the best potion?” He paused, “why are you looking at me like that? This is a great idea!”

“You’re not wrong.” Remus admitted, “It’s just unrealistic. We'd be there for hours.”

“Well fine, if Dumbledore won’t do it, I will!”

🌙✨🌙✨🌙

“Thank you for attending the Hogwarts alternative awards ceremony!” Sirius bowed slightly, “Tonight each of you will walk away with at least one award, and you’re gonna feel great about it! A reminder that these have been voted for by your peers, and it’s not just my opinion, because some of these choices are truly wild.”

“If you keep plying us with firewhisky, I doubt that we’ll feel great for much longer,” Remus said quietly, earning himself a glare from Sirius.

“Ok, the first award is ‘Best at potions’ and it goes to… Lily Evans!”

Lily rolled her eyes and collected the small trophy from Sirius. She then won ‘best at hexes’, which James confirmed enthusiastically.

“Best sportsmanship could only go to James!”

As the evening went on, Marlene and Dorcas won ‘cutest couple’, Marlene won ‘baddest bitch’ (to Sirius’ dismay), Mary won ‘most artistic’ and ‘kindest to creatures’, Pete won ‘Handy herbologist’ and ‘best at chess’, Lily won ‘best grades’ and Sirius won ‘best hair’.

James got out their emergency firewhisky stash, which didn’t matter as there was only a week of term left anyway. He was then awarded a spur-of-the-moment ‘best provider’ by Sirius personally.

The alcohol was hitting all of them pretty hard. Sirius sat on his trunk to continue presenting.

“Ok, the next award is ‘hottest person (that you’ve never dated)’, and the winner is… Remus.”

Remus stared at him, “uh, the fuck?” He said, eloquently. He gestured for Sirius to throw his award to him. Getting up felt difficult. “Uh, thanks?”

James wolf-whistled as Remus’ cheeks went pink. The next award was ‘most books read’ which also, unsurprisingly, went to Remus.

And the final award of the night is ‘kindest person’, and that award goes to…” Sirius rolled his eyes, “who else? Moony!”

Remus covered his face with his hands. He was officially too drunk for people to be this nice to him. “Thank you.” He muttered.

“This concludes the 1976 alternative awards night, please feel free to stay and drink and make an arse of yourself, at least until Moony wants to go to bed, then you have to fuck off.” Sirius took a small bow and then plonked himself on the floor next to Remus. “Alright?”

Remus chuckled softly, “Yeah, a bit drunk and overwhelmed but in a nice way.”

“Because people have recognised that you read books and that you’re kind and hot?”

“I guess?” Remus resisted the urge to cover his face again. “This was a great idea, by the way. We should do this next year, too.”

“Yeah? Alright, but I’ll probably need a cohost.” He fluttered his long eyelashes at Remus.

“I’m sure Prongs will make a delightful cohost.” He said with a wolfish grin. “But I suppose if you want me, I could probably do that.”

Sirius froze, “If I— Oh, cohost, right. Yeah.”

“Alright?” Remus frowned, “You’ve gone all pale.”

“I might need some air,” Sirius said quickly, heading toward the window. Remus pulled himself to his feet and followed.

Sirius opened the window and sat on the ledge with his back against the wall, Remus mirrored his position, their legs tangled together in the middle. Sirius pulled out his cigarettes, lit one between his lips, passed it to Remus, and then lit one himself.

“Why do you get all weird when people call you hot?” Sirius said after a while.

“Fuck, straight in with the tough questions tonight.” Remus grimaced. “I suppose deep down I don’t believe it.” He said quietly. Sirius could barely hear him over the party in the middle of their dorm. “Not in a self-pitying way or anything, I just don’t see what other people see, I guess.”

Sirius stared at him, “I guess you don’t.” He frowned slightly, “It goes beyond hot, Moons.” Remus’ eyes snapped up to meet his. “You’re beaut—”

“Not interrupting anything I hope!” James interrupted. “The girls want to play games and Pete and I feel very outnumbered.” He took a closer look at his friends both with and over his glasses. “Oh shit, did I actually interrupt something?”

“No!” Sirius flicked his cigarette out of the window, hopped off the windowsill and sat back on the floor. Remus followed him and sat a little closer than he had been before, their hands touching on the rug.

Notes:

I got halfway through this and was like 'Chloe, this is ridiculous' and then I just... kept on writing 😂💕🌙✨

[loserboyfriendrjl]

“So you think you can stone me and spit in my eye!? So you think you can love me and leave me to die-ie!? Oh, baby, can’t do this to me, baby!—”

Sirius slammed his hands on the door repeatedly. “You gotta get out, just gotta get right outta here!” He shouted, mimicking the lyrics Peter was singing. “Or I’m gonna get you out of there myself!”

Peter opened the door, towel around his waist. “Good morning to you, too, sunshine,” He said, rolling his eyes amusedly. “Slept well?”

“I need to piss,” He moaned, giving Peter an affectionate shove and closing the door behind him.

“And thank you for the opportunity to listen to the entire A Night at the Opera album, mate!” Remus clapped politely, trying desperately to make his hair look like he hadn’t just rolled out of bed. (Which he had, obviously, just done.)

“Spectacular,” James agreed, laughing, buttoning up his shirt. “Next time, maybe you should belt out some Bowie, too. Or ABBA. Would make for a nice change.”

“I vote for The Who.” Sirius snickered, running a hand through his hair after he had turned the tap off. “Or, if you’d be so kind to please Moony, too, The Beach Boys.”

Remus nodded, giving up on his hair and tying his tie. “I doubt that we have the time for a concert of all that, considering we’re already running late.”

“Alright, gents, off to breakfast!” James declared, opening the door for them.

[familyvideostevie]

summer's early sway

thank you for voting in this poll! here is remus taking you to a craft fair and calling you his girlfriend for the first time xo | fluff, early relationship, 1k

It might be the most perfect day ever. It's warm but not too warm, the sunlight's sting soothed by a nice breeze. You've made it to the craft fair fairly early to avoid the crowds, though not as early as you'd planned. Despite Remus's best attempts at order in most parts of his life, it's more like controlled chaos. He tends to run a little behind though that's still earlier than anyone you know.

You've been on enough dates that you've lost count but not enough that it's stopped feeling new. You're meeting his friends for dinner tonight -- the first official time you'll all be hanging out together, though you've met the boys a few times here and there -- but today is all about the two of you. You're going to stroll around the craft fair and then go for a walk by the water in the summer sunshine and probably sneak some kisses.

The market is lovely and you tell Remus so. You've got your hand in the crook of his elbow like you're on an old-timey date.

"You think so?" he says, eyes crinkling. "I've not been but I thought you'd like it because of the music." There was a folk band playing by the entrance and he's right, you do love it. What is there to say to his kindness?

No words come, so you kiss his cheek instead. Remus looks like summer was made for him though you know he's most alive in the fall. The sun tans his skin and makes his scars more prominent which makes him more handsome, in your opinion. His hair highlights just a little bit and he loosens up in the sunshine. It's magic.

"Did I tell you how lovely you look today?" he says, small smile turning to a grin. His eye contact is so intense that you can only hold it for a few moments before you look down at your feet.

"You might have," you tell him. He's said it many times just this morning. "You do, too."

"Darling, you'll make me blush."

The market has plenty of beautiful things. Your own place is full of knick-knacks whereas Remus tends to be a bit more minimalist. It makes you smile to remember how you've given him a few things since you started dating and he's put them all in prominent places.

You find a tent of frog sculptures and name all of them. A beautiful and kind of eerie raven pendant in the same row catches your eye and you buy it for Lily's birthday.

"Don't let me forget to get soap for James' mum," Remus says, palm on your lower back as he watches the artist pack up your gift.

"Christmas shopping this early?" you tease.

His face is so close that you can't see all of it but you know what his smirk looks like. "Obviously," he says, voice low in your ear. "I've got to impress her. She's got to like me best."

Another row of stalls reveals one full of stuff made out of spoons. Wind chimes, clocks, kitchen utensils, belts. You're looking at a spoon lamp as Remus wanders further into the tent to chat with the man running it. Their voices carry but you don't pay much attention until you realize you're being called into the conversation.

"Maybe your girlfriend would want one?" the man asks Remus. You look up and find both of them looking at you, the man with a somewhat bemused expression and Remus with what you can only describe as adoration.

You walk over and see that he's been admiring a large collection of rings made from spoon handles. "What do you think, my girlfriend?" he asks cheekily. It's the first time he's actually called you this out loud to someone else -- you've discussed it, of course, and you figure that it's how he refers to you when you're not around but you've not heard it yet. And even though it's a bit of a joke it makes you feel like you've just sped down the steep part of a rollercoaster.

"Only if you get one, too, boyfriend." you say, though you're not totally sure where it comes from. Remus's eyes widen in mirth and he blushes a little.

Rings are much more Sirius's thing, so you gather, so you think Remus will laugh you off but he seems to actually consider it.

"Pick one for me, then." You laugh in delight and survey the display boxes of rings as he looks for one for you, too. You settle on a curved handle with an intricate twisty pattern that should fit his thumb and he picks a lovely one that will fit your thumb, decorated with a delicate flower and vine.

"Perfect," he says, sliding the ring onto your thumb as you slide your selection onto his. It's startlingly intimate, exchanging rings, even if they're made of spoon handles and going on your thumbs. Your heart beats loudly in your chest and you can't stop smiling.

The shopkeeper is grinning as he reads off the price and Remus pays. You are admiring your new ring in the light when he grabs your other hand and pulls you back into the row of tents.

"Quite stylish, Rem," you say. You lean in to give him a kiss on the cheek in thanks but he feels you coming and turns his head to catch your lips in a quick kiss.

"You're quite welcome," he says, smile turning cheeky. "Sirius is going to have a fit that he's not the only one wearing rings anymore."

"Oh, let him," you say. "From what you've told me, he could do with a bit of humbling."

Remus's eyes sparkle. "On that, darling, we agree." He kisses you again, just as quick but no less tender before he pulls away and points at something over your shoulder. "Oh, look! Soap!"

He drags you towards the tent to the sound of your laughter. Sure, you haven't been together very long, but you're pretty sure you could do this for the rest of your life.

thank you for reading <3 reblog, send feedback, masterlist here!

[my-castles-crumbling]

Please reblog for more votes, this is obviously a scientific necessity.

[impishtubist]

as the result of padfoot and moony fucking, they now have a litter of puppies that turn into wolves on the full moon. please discuss.

Ooooooooooh, puppies that turn into wolves! That's a new one!

Okay, well, obviously Padfoot knocked Moony up in this scenario. Werewolf pregnancies are slightly longer than human ones, so Remus/Moony spend a full year pregnant, and neither one is happy.

Moony spends the last few moons of his pregnancy making a lil nest, and the litter is born there. Since they are only going from dog to wolf and back again, their transformations are much easier.

There are six dog-wolf puppies, and Sirius puts a birth announcement in the Prophet just like all other magical children born in the UK.

Harry starts a list of baby names for them. Soon all of Gryffindor Tower joins in, and then the rest of the school. He owls Sirius and Remus a list of the names that get the most votes. Sirius and Remus of course use these names.

Sirius and Remus go on walks in the village with their six children and everyone stops to coo over them.

Sirius transforms into Padfoot a lot and plays with his babies. He also can communicate with them when in dog form.

Also I like to think that Sirius gets into arguments with people who say that "dogs aren't the same as children" lmao.

[pandagobrr]

Not an art ask, just wanted to know if you'd go on a rant about your favorite Sanders Side? Thomas really be making us wait for the reveal of the orange side 😭

Okay so I had a whole thing cued up here, but then I got distracted and I opened a Tumblr notification and it lost what I had 😭. So here we go, round 2.

I think my favorite side out of all our favorites little boys, would have to be Logan, although I really like Remus too. I've seen a bunch of those posts comparing season one Logan to current Logan and I just- noooooo. Not my sweet little nerdy specs. He's so open and enthusiastic in the beginning but then everyone ignores him and he minimizes his role in discussion to minimize how much people ridicule him. It's like how when people treat someone like a certain something for long enough, they begin to act like it. So when people started treating Lo's contributions as insignificant, he started pulling away from discussion more, distancing and detaching himself from things he would've actually been excited about before. Like how in Are There Healthy Distractions, Logan doesn't wear his unicorn onesie, and says "I don't wear those anymore, they're too childish." despite meaning that he didn't get to vote in what movie they watched. And then at the end of the episode, we see Lo in his onesie, hugging it and apologize for saying that it was childish.

Now of course, this was probably played for comedic purposes, but it shows that Logan was embarrassed about something he actually really likes, even to the point of putting it down. He's trying harder and harder to be taken seriously, yet all of his efforts have yielded minimal results. My boy is going to get burnt out like a crisp if one of two things don't happen. Either 1. Thomas and the rest of the sides finally realize what Logan is going through and take our boy more serious, or 2. Logan realizes that Thomas and his fellow sides don't mean to hurt him, they *do* care about him, but they are just a tad oblivious. Obviously we're all rooting for option number 1, but if option number 2 does happen, maybe Logan will become more comfortable in his own skin, and develop a stronger and more resilient sense of self that will be invaluable later on.

Anyways, there's my rant, hope you enjoyed it (wow this got much longer than I was anticipating). And yeah, we all are ~~not so~~ patiently waiting for the reveal of a new cool side

[polaroidcats]

here is some visual aid, for anyone else who didn't know the english dwarf names:

some important thoughts and headcanons by @hiddenmoonbeam and I under the cut, so as not to influence the voting even more (this is a highly scientific and objective inquiry after all!!!)

James would probably be Dopey, esp if it's an Au where Lily is snow white (Dopey is the one who lines up for a 2nd kiss, peak James behaviour, no matter if Lily or Sirius are snow white, it still fits)

Remus is sleepy, no further explanation needed

IF Sirius isn't a dwarf but is actually Snow White, that adds a whole new layer to the height discourse!!!

Sirius could even still be the fanon tiny dainty petite mini version BUT he'd still be by far the tallest one around

Remus COULD even be super tall (for a dwarf) but he would never reach higher than Sirius's chest or waist MAXIMUM

dwarf Remus regularly asks snow white Sirius to reach up high on shelves for him and goes all 😍😍😍🥺🥹🥹 when Sirius can easily reach even the highest shelves in their house

Peter is probably Sneezy

okay I'll stop now thank you for reading this

[seriouslysam8]

Hey Sam, I’m not voting on your poll because you’re way too hard on yourself! I am a Brumous fan, and you’ve made me fall in love with Blackinnon, and now I can’t picture Sirius with anyone else! Hinny is my OTP, and I love the way you write Ginny and how loving and hilarious you make the Weasley family scenes. I don’t think you’re drifting off. There’s obviously something creative going on in that beautiful mind of yours, and we’re all jumping along for the ride. I love all your stories, but I think you need to remember that the majority of us are Sam fans. We’ll read whatever you write, and if you need a break, then take it, and we’ll be here when you’re back 🫶🏼

I’m sure a therapist would say that’s a byproduct of childhood trauma. We can joke about it like Harry, if you like.

I LOVE that you love Blackinnon now!! They’re a fun couple to write but I do want to make the Fleamia lives story (if I ever get around to writing it) a Sirigan story. I love them together as well. Honestly, I’d read Sirius with anyone except for Remus.

While Ginny has gotten some shit recently, I adore her. I love the entire Weasley family. We need another Weasley-Potter-Black dinner. Throw in the Tonkses too! One thing I miss about the MIT series was writing the big chaotic Weasley family dinners. I used to make seating charts for those scenes. It was wild.

You are so sweet! You all have been so sweet. I’ve been sweating for weeks now because the chapter just wasn’t coming!

[ruined-sketchbook]

I'd like to know more about your sides as avatars AU, if you'd like to share :D

Idk what to ask, so just tell me all about it and I'll come up with questions. I'm really curious about it

-g

I've been thinking about it constantly but in terms of stuff I haven't already said I don't think I have toooo much?

Like I said I wanna include Hades and Homer, and I've been imagining both of them as avatars of The End in different ways.

Hades is a taxidermist (it was between that and a mortuary person but my partner voted for taxidermist so that's where I ended up) but the way he does the whole fear generation thing is like. Appearing sort of like as an omen of death. I'm horrible with articulating my ideas lmao I've just been imagining him standing there menacingly and that putting the fear of death into people for the most part.

As for Homer. I've been imagining a reanimated corpse situation with him, sort of like the Jane Doe cadaver from Georgie's statement. As for what he does...I don't have specifics on that one. Obviously there's the option to also have him do the whispering thing but idk.

I also figured out the Critic (who for reference I refer to as Dice- I think the fandom settled on Anton but Dice is too firmly cemented in my brain atp)! He is an avatar of The Vast :] big space fan that guy. He is going to toss you straight into the exosphere /j

Also another thought I've been having is Remus using Logan as Surviving The Horrors For Dummies. Got weird shit going on? Go ask Logan! It's how he found out Roman didn't get bodysnatched. Logan definitely hits him with the "figure it out yourself damn it" a lot though. Logan's just trying to collect information he isn't trying to be Monster Google, Remus.

[alvin-draper]

Hello beautiful people I finished All the Young Dudes and now I need to sleep for multiple weeks and stare blankly at walls to recover. Really really good fic. Incredible historical accuracy, incredible imagery throughout.

Their school years were fun and beautiful and cozy. I'm going to enjoy rereading them. The pranks are all fucking inspired and the romances are just stunning. They all feel like real people the whole time.

The war starts and then it's like Remus starts mythologising people in his head. Lily goes from his best friend to someone he sees less than anyone else and he has to build this perfect image of her. Sirius and him and falling apart and together and apart again. Peter skirts the sidelines and they all miss it.

Post war is hell, briefly. He never recovers. Grant is his rock and his love and it feels like he spend a decade taking him for granted before he finally realises just how much he loves him. They buy groceries, they talk about politics, Grant drags Remus to a gay bar on his 31st, and Remus doesn't want to go because there'll be people there, who are obviously shit, because they voted for Thatcher and listen to The Smiths. But when they get there Remus realises that people are gay without being afraid at all, and he holds Grant's hand and they laugh and have a good night.

Then. Then Sirius comes back, and just how much Remus has grown against how much Sirius hasn't is fully palpable. The distance between them is a jagged ravine. Grant gets stuck in the middle, and Sirius hates him for being normal, for being there, for looking dull and plain and not him. And then Grant sees the writing on the wall and leaves the only person he's ever really loved with the only person they would've ever given their whole life to. And that's that.

Anyway yeah this fic tore me into tiny little pieces chewed me up and spit me back out. There are so many little things now, like two mars bars and moony toast and Remus having three different levels of tea making stress all involving different brewing times (magic, electric kettle, stove). "Anything for our Moony", "You were my little bit of magic", and equally "Why did you burn that letter?" and "Remus... something awful has happened."

Brilliant lines that are etched on the inside of my skull.

Reading that fic was bloody exhausting and I'm well ready for a kip now.

[marauderswolf22]

wolfstar headcanons

from your votes!

Remus was absolutely ALWAYS cold. Whether it's spring, winter or the end of summer, he could wear a sweater for the whole day with unearthly calm. Sirius was the opposite. In the cold he could wear a short sleeve, though he regretted it more than once in the future. So when there was a moment when both of them had had enough, one of them would start the exchange. -Rem you have my sweatshirt it's too warm. - And Remus, shivering from the cold, was just putting it on.

Remus was a jealous bitch. It's not just flirting or suspicious behavior among people next to, Sirius that triggers it, sometimes even a glance. He didn't know if it's because of his lycanthropy, but prefers to say it's because of having a miracle like Black. Sirius, besides the fact that sometimes things could get out of control, does not hide it behind closed doors as much as he likes it. When he's talking to someone who obviously likes him, and he's trying to get his way. He glances to the side and sees sparks in Lupin's eyes, thumbs rubbing together in an attempt to release his nervousness. Always after such situations, Sirius must reassure him, whether in word or deed. But both of them know deep down that not even the stars can separate the moon and the sun, shining together.

From chocolate to cigarettes and coffee, Remus had a lot of addictions (including Black). Sirius denounced his nicotine habit, but he himself was no better. He was drinking. Not in the sense of an alcoholic, he just caused the subsequent breaking of glasses when the opportunity arose. So at almost every major party, the two of them would hide in the corners restlessly enjoying the damn thing. James took advantage of this by talking about what the other was doing the next day. They pretended to be outraged by their behavior and vowed to each other that it was the last time. Even if a month later Sirius drank the equivalent of the Thames and Remus smoked a European supply of cigarettes.

+(i know it's not a habit!) Sirius was afraid of snakes. For no reason, just seeing these creatures in front of his eyes felt their tongue gnaw at his skin as the monster approached his arteries. Maybe it's because of his brave dog side, but that's another story. Unfortunately, Remus discovered this fear by bringing these enemies together. -Look how cute! - He led the unsuspecting poor Padfoot towards a deadly creature that suddenly hissed in the bushes. Sirius literally fainted, and it took a few long moments for Remus to wake him up.

[mokkkki]

SWTE A1 C11 - 2 Winners, 6 Losers 

“Let’s slaughter the little prince.”

Admittedly the most active chapter yet. Still in Eurus, but it’s getting less Winter Wonderland and more Nightmare Before Christmas, as evidenced by a monstrous drinking game, a life-threatening race, and that last sentence. Without further ado, here are our many losers and occasional winners of “A Foul-Mouthed, Sociopathic ***”. Spoilers below the cut. 

Winner: James Potter (& Simon & The Unnamed Female Waitress) 

I’m starting to think that no matter what happens to him he’s a winner if only because of his mentality? Anyways, he is undoubtedly a winner this chapter- he has a fun night that he enjoys, and got a family heirloom that he thought he lost, a bracelet designed in Hyderabad by an ancestor, hand-delivered to him by his crush, who then admitted that they were friends. Getting screamed at by said crush for experimenting sexually aside, he’s kind of in the zone. 

Winner: Remus Lupin 

Ski Champion Lupin went on a date with Sirius, won against Regulus on a Black Diamond course, and kept his presidential candidate loyal to him. A win is a win. 

Loser: Lucius Malfoy 

To be honest, the only reason I’m putting Soy Boy Himbo Lucius as a loser is because he got fired from Greyscar. Seriously, he held his own during Slut in the Hut, was lowkey having a romantic moment with Narcissa, and remains MMG’s chairman. Unfortunately, one of the most powerful men in America know he was a spy, so he is absolutely and completely fucked. 

Loser: Emma Vanity 

Even though she was the first person voted out in Slut in the Hut, she had to deal with the most neurotic man on earth in her room (that is also her boss) until four in the fucking morning, watched his family humiliate him, dragged his hungover ass into her Rolls Royce, AND had to update him when he finally woke up. Justice for my girl Vanity. 

Loser: Orion Black 

Regulus, arguably his most suitable heir, let him down, and his other son was outed for his instability! I also feel like he’s getting  bit suspicious about Regulus’ intentions. Most obviously, his dead brother, Cygnus, just got an article published about him that seems weirdly accusatory. 

Loser: Narcissa Black

LISTEN, NARCISSA IS A LOSER AND I WILL HEAR NO COUNTERARGUMENTS. Malfoy got fired, and her conference was mediocre, and since she’s as much as a batshit perfectionist as Reggie is, that is the equivalent of standing on stage and bawling her eyes out. In Narcissa’s brain, as long as the attention (negative or positive) is on her male counterparts, she’s a loser- and in a horrible way, she’s right. 

Loser: Sirius Black 

Watching Lupin win the race was probably a massive turn-on for Sirius, but it kind of feels like he’s on the verge of some very bad decisions. His relationship with Lupin isn’t the most positive influence, and even though he’s been sober for a while, he’s still treated as unstable and volatile. If he doesn’t find a sense of stability, either with Marlene or in himself, I see things going downhill for Sirius, and FAST. Also, he didn’t get that joke about him being Oedipus. That’s so embarrassing. 

Loser: Regulus Black 

Since I don’t need to justify this, I’m just going to list his losses in order of least to most humiliating.

McGonagall being late 

The insinuation that he shouldn’t be serviced (AKA him misunderstanding Barty and Evan's hardcore flirting) 

Being forced to admit that him and James are friends  

Lupin getting to McGonagall before him 

Lupin beating him by two minutes…

…because he made the conscious decision to stop and retrieve James’ bracelet

Returning it the next morning to see that James has had a threesome with a woman and a man 

Getting absolutely roasted by Malfoy 

Being sent away from Eurus five days early 

Slut in the Hut 

Jumping off his balcony 

read chapter 11 here!

[prince-rowan-of-the-forest]

The Choosing Ball (4/?)

Virgil and Janus talk through some important feelings.

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Warnings:

a mention of LGBTQIA+-phobia, a singular sex joke.

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Whoo the chapter where they talk things out!

The poll voted for Siren Boy, but I've been able to do basically no writing this week, I'm really sorry xP, I hope this shall suffice!

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It turned out that finding Virgil had hardly been the gargantuan task he had been expecting. When he located the building that must have housed the guards’ sleeping quarters, he immediately picked up the sound of hushed conversation on one of the balconies. He went closer, hoping to pick up on some of whatever they were saying.

“Yeah like, I can’t believe you got to leave,” One of them said, Janus didn’t recognise the voice, “It’s so boring here- no good gossip! You gotta tell me everything, did you meet anyone? Any of the princes rude to you? Ooh- were any of them good looking?”

"Well- I-" The other guard started, before being interrupted again.

"Did you get to see any of the castle? Is it as big inside as it looks from here? What's-" 

"Remy I can't answer your questions if you keep asking me more," Janus' eyes widened, that was Virgil! And- wasn't Remy the name of the guard Roman had mentioned earlier?

"Oh, right, sorry babes," 

"Don't call me that," Virgil sighed.

"Sorry, sorry, damn you Nathirians are so uptight, anyways, my questions?" 

Janus sighed as Virgil attempted to work his way through the questions he remembered. He'd never get Virgil's attention from down here, which meant he'd have to climb up. He glanced around, thankfully noticing a plant with sturdy looking vines that had grown up the side of the wall. 

As Janus had told Virgil, he was indeed notoriously good at sneaking, so much so that his handmaids and the seamstresses back in his own palace had started outfitting him with bells and jingly bits on his clothes in a way they thought was subtle so that he couldn't sneak up on people. Somehow he still managed to sneak up on the castle staff (by accident, mostly) even then.

The fact that he managed to make it up onto the balcony without either guard noticing him should really be testimony to his lack of presence. 

Remy noticed him first, though Janus couldn't actually see his reaction behind the dark tinted glasses he was for some reason wearing despite it being entirely dark out. He ignored the guy for now, instead stepping forward to stand right behind Virgil.

"Guess who," Janus said, before slipping his hands over his guard's eyes. Virgil jumped in surprise, though he'd deny it if asked, making Janus laugh.

"Jan, you have got to stop doing that!" Virgil yelped, reaching to remove his hands from his face, "What're you doing up here?" 

"Ooooh babes, who's the sneaky guy?" Remy asked, leaning forwards, "Who are you and what's your business here?" 

Virgil groaned, "Remy this is Jan, Jan, Remy, this is the guy I told you about earlier, with the coffee," 

"I see," Janus said as though he hadn't just been eavesdropping, "It is.. er, nice meeting you?" 

"Riiiight," Remy said, staring him down, "Ok sure, y'know what, obviously you two don't want me here, I'll see you inside, Virgil! I better get all the juicy gossip about your juicy man when you're done!"

Remy headed into the room connected to the balcony and Janus turned to begin speaking with Virgil before the door flew back open and Remy leant back out.

"And no sex on the balcony!" He yelled, making an 'I’m watching you' gesture with his fingers, "Or I'll know," 

"....I can tell how he's Prince Remus' guard," Janus said, watching as Remy retreated down the hallway. Virgil huffed out a breath that could have been a laugh as they turned to each other.

"He won't leave me alone," Virgil said, half laughing, "He seems to think me interesting."

Janus hummed, looking away and Virgil seemed to sense that something was wrong, considering he leaned further into his side.

“Hey,” Virgil said, slipping a hand into Janus', “What’s up? Is something wrong?”

“I wanted to see you before going to sleep,” Janus answered, half truthfully, he wouldn’t admit how worried he had been, he already knew that Virgil already knew.

“I see,” Virgil said with a smile, leading them over to the balcony railing and leaning his elbows on it, Janus copied him, “Did- um- did anything interesting happen during the banquet?”

An invitation to talk about what he really wanted to talk about, without having to bring it up himself.

“I talked with Roman again,” Janus said slowly, “After the banquet, we went to the library and…. I took your advice,”

“You showed him?” Virgil asked, looking at him with a slight tilt to his head, “Was he… okay with it?”

“Yes, I believe so,” Janus said, “He told me I was beautiful and- well I suppose I may have ran off,”

Virgil had the audacity to laugh, so Janus pulled him into a kiss in order to shut him up, which only served to make Virgil laugh harder. 

��Virgil, darling, please,” Janus said, a little desperately and Virgil immediately stopped laughing, turning to actually look at him, before he reached forward and cupped Janus’ face in the same way Roman had done not even half an hour earlier.

“This… this is really bothering you, isn’t it?” Virgil whispered, Janus nodded, meeting Virgil’s eyes. 

“I’m not sure why, but… my interaction with Roman has got me feeling all tied up in knots,” Janus said with a sigh. Virgil smirked, leaning forwards and kissing his nose.

“Have you considered that perhaps, there may be some kind of feelings there?” Virgil asked, tilting his head a little, Janus stared for a second, face steadily growing more red as he realised what Virgil was implying.

“I- of course there's no feelings there, Virgil, I love you, and I doubt I'm going to stop loving you any time soon,” Janus said firmly, Virgil smiled, leaning forward and kissing him again.

“I know, and I love you too, but Jan, have you considered that you are able to love more than one person? That polyamory is a possibility?” Virgil asked, raising an eyebrow. The prince sputtered, “Because… If you have, I have,”

“I- I suppose that-” Janus cut himself off, ducking his head, “Isn’t that… inappropriate? Our kingdom would never sanction it, you know that, and besides, Roman would never agree anyway, it’s a waste to even bother thinking about it.”

“From what I’ve gathered from Remy,” Virgil told him, “Polyamory, and a lot of other stuff too, is much less restrictive in their kingdom than it is in ours.”

“Regardless, in our kingdom it is still the same, and I am an only child, if me and Roman did choose each other, we would go back to our kingdom.”

“Where it wouldn’t be seen as polyamory anyway because they don’t know that we’re already in a relationship,” Virgil told him, squeezing Janus’ hand, “It would be only Roman that would need to know.”

“And what if he doesn’t even like me?”

“Then he’ll say no and you will never have to see each other again,” Virgil sighed, “And you’ll still have me either way.”

“And… you’re okay with all of this?” Janus asked, “We would be breaking the law even more than we already are, you know, and- and I'd have to marry him, without you there, it would- it would all be so much harder- ”

“I know,” Virgil interrupted, leaning over to kiss his cheek, “Trust me I've already over-thought this ten times more than you have, and I- would like to talk with Roman more, yes, but- you know, he is… very pretty…”

“Is he now?” Janus asked, tone slipping into something more teasing, “I didn’t notice.”

“Don’t be an ass,” Virgil rolled his eyes, looking out from the balcony towards the castle, “The ball is tomorrow and- I think you should talk to him before that.”

“And say what?” Janus said with a huff, “That I- what? Like him? After- after I ran off at the first signs of anything happening earlier?”

“Just say whatever you feel like saying,” Virgil said, “But maybe try and keep the running away to a minimum, huh?”

“You’re a hypocrite,” Janus said, “Why don’t you talk to him if you think he’s so pretty?”

Virgil went red, “Well- I- you- hey!”

“Sorry, sorry,” Janus shook his head, “That was mean of me.”

“It was, I need to talk to him too, but it’s probably better that you do so first,” Virgil sighed, “Even if really I’m probably more worried than you seem to be.”

“Worried? Me? Never,” Janus said, shaking his head with a smile, before his face fell and he sighed, “I know I need to talk to him, we’re the ones that need to choose, after all.”

“Yes,” Virgil nodded, “And if you agree to choose each other then you’ll have all the time in the world to talk after as well.”

“I suppose we will,” Janus nodded, “Thank you, for this.”

“You’re welcome,” Virgil said, “I suppose it’s fair, considering I’m usually on the receiving end of these talks.”

Janus couldn’t help but laugh, then, lifting their intertwined hands to kiss Virgil’s knuckles, “I should be getting back…”

“I’ll see you after breakfast tomorrow then?” Virgil aske, tilting his head a little. 

“Of course,” Janus nodded, “I think I might die if I had to endure tomorrow without you, my darling.”

“Sap,” Virgil said, shaking his head with a huff, “Go away now, and sleep well.”

“Sleep well, love.” Janus replied, leaning forward to press a parting kiss to Virgil’s lips, “Goodnight.”

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Tags: @full-of-roman-angst-trash @reptilianrapscallion420 @your-local-random-dino @cutebisexualmess @glacierruler @roseianxiety @bella-bugatti-frogetti-baguetti (if anyone wants to be added, let me know!)

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[what-a-weird-rose]

WolfStar: The Things I Say (Only with You)

Pairing: Remus Lupin / Sirius Black

Rating: E

Prompt: Daddy

Word Count: 3.8

Sirius can feel the tension in his hair and the day’s stress move in waves through his body, riding high after the utterly terrible day he’d experienced. From waking up late to detention in the dungeons to turning in a late, half-finished Transfiguration essay directly to McGonagall- his day had gone opposite how he’d have wished it.

Despite dreading how the universe would screw him further, Sirius soldiered into the Gryffindor common room, then into the dorm, hoping James, Peter, or Remus would cheer him up.

Much to his dismay, he was utterly alone as he entered the room.

Sirius groans loudly and without care for who might be able to hear him as he slams the door shut behind him. As if his day couldn’t get worse, he laments; they’re probably off pranking without him, the twats. Of course, it was doubtful, but Sirius often couldn’t help himself but imagine how much better off the others would be without him dragging them down. He hates it, loathes the way his mother remains with him even so far away- she sewed herself into the fabric of his scars, embedding herself innately into his worst parts that she’s there even at his best. Sirius tries, he really does, to separate himself from her in his mind, as Effie had told him time and time to do, because he is not her, except- he sounds like her when he screams manically. And he rages like her, tearing down everything in his path without care for consequences. And he loves like her, taking and taking and taking with no regard to giving back, or, even worse when he tries to give love back, it comes out twisted and mangled.

Walburga had left scars in the fiber of his soul; she’d left trauma so deep within him that he found new things to fear and hate and learned about himself almost daily.

He was lucky for James, Sirius decides as he lays flat on Peter’s bed, lucky for all of them. But James in particular- he loved Peter and Remus, but they had their reasons for being unable to take him in from Grimmauld. James had no obstacles and no reservations.

It’s on days like these that Sirius reminisces on the bad and less bad of his life; on days that good is so obviously wrong, he enjoys comparing how bad it could’ve been, despite Effie telling him it’s unhealthy.

The door opens with a creak, but Sirius finds himself too caught up in his mind to give much attention to whoever has newly entered.

“You do realize that isn’t your bed, right?” He hears Remus muse from behind him, and Sirius considers flipping over to stare at him. He doesn’t.

“It would’ve been mine if you had participated in the vote,” Sirius had long let go of his resentment at losing the first-year democratic debate 2:1. He’d wanted the bed closest to the door for flopping purposes and had called it first. Still, James and Peter had ganged up on him, claiming it for Peter under “medical reasons.” Of course, when Sirius had called Remus in for backup, Remus had replied with a curt piss-off before stuffing his bag under his bed in the far corner, slipping past the curtains, and not reemerging until the following day. “I will never forgive you for that.”

“Of course not, how could you? I was completely in the wrong and betrayed you in the worst sense of the word,” Remus snips back, without heat.

It had taken Sirius a long time to figure out Remus; primarily as Remus had actively worked against Sirius, James, and Peter’s attempt to befriend him. For the first two years of knowing him, Sirius lived on the edge, constantly afraid of the quick-tongue and cutting words Remus was prone to send to those who crossed him. It wasn’t until mid-second-year -right before he had put the full moons and Remus’ disappearances together- that Sirius had realized that Remus meant very little of the snark he gave to his dorm-mates. Subsequently, Sirius discovered that it was mainly used to cover his hurt. After that full moon in March, Sirius decided he and Remus would be best friends, stemming from their use of meanness and cruel humor to hide their shame and hurt.

“You know, Moony, I always get what I want,” Sirius says nonchalantly, but he certainly can feel in the air as Remus shifts. Sirius curses internally. It would be absolutely true if he could go back in time; he could get whatever he wanted if he could stop his fifth year-self.

The end of their fifth year was a blur for all the wrong reasons. The beginning was fine- fantastic, actually. Sirius and Remus had a budding romance, a will-they-won’t-they situation straight out of one of Mary’s romance novels. Then, Sirius had to open his big, fat mouth on that godforsaken January moon. He’d thought it would be funny, a good scare for Snape, and a hearty laugh for him and his friends. But everything went wrong -or exactly how it was meant to- and Sirius didn’t see the fatal flaw in his plan. There was no hearty laughter; instead, he was all but exiled from the dorm -he could never, and would never, blame James and Peter for siding solely and entirely with Remus- and isolated from the other Gryffindors in his year. Though they didn’t know the whole story, Mary, Lily,and Marlene needed little in the way of motivation to cut Sirius off, especially as it became clear that he’d done something terrible to Remus, which he had.

The Prank had not only managed to fuck up Sirius and Remus’ relationship to the very core, but it also had fucked Remus up to his very core. The experience had shaken him so thoroughly that he had gone non-verbal for two months following and refused to speak to Sirius until the beginning of their sixth year, relying on short notes when absolutely necessary.

Despite all the terrible his mistake had caused, Sirius was sure the worst outcome was the inherent fracture between him and Remus. Remus had forgiven him -thank Merlin for that- but he had said, point blank, that he would never forget it, even if he wanted to. And, perhaps the most heart wrenching thing was when Remus had whispered to Sirius that he would likely never be able to trust him so innately again. Hearing it- thinking about it, made Sirius want to cry.

“I love you, Moony, you know that, right?” Sirius whispers into Peter’s pillowcase, hoping Remus both can and cannot hear him.

“I know, Padfoot. I love you, too,” Sirius sighs, not unhappily. He listens as Remus shifts again, climbing into his bed, likely for a quick nap through the break period. Sirius wishes they could say it as something different than how he says it to James and Peter. Because that is what they are; they aren’t just brothers, nor are they just friends. Sirius is confident that he would never look at James, or Merlin forbid Regulus the way he looks at Remus. And he knows that no one feels the deep-seeded love and lust, need and want for someone who is only a friend.

Sirius rolls over, staring at the stickers and photos Peter has stuck to the ceiling of his bed frame.

“Moony, Moony- come look at these, Pete’s got one of his girlfriend,” Sirius calls, and ignores how childish he sounds.

“Piss off, Padfoot, I’m sleeping,” Remus replies, clearly not asleep.

“Awe, c’mon Moony-pie, don’t you want to see Peter smooch his girlfriend- Destiny? Daisy? Something like that.”

“Actually, Sirius, I shockingly don’t want to see that even slightly,” Remus grumbles, but Sirius could hear the amusement in his voice from the other end of the castle.

Sirius sits up quickly, snatching the photo of Peter and the girlfriend whose name Sirius cannot be bothered to remember, before swinging his legs over the bed and sidling up to where Remus is lying with his arm over his eyes. “Don’t you want to see Peter’s impressive charm work? He finally figured out how to keep them moving.”

Remus snorts, moving his arm and opening his eyes to stare into Sirius. He shifts slightly, opening a space so Sirius can lay next to him; Sirius moves faster than light.

Remus is deliciously warm against Sirius’ always-cold skin. Their arms lay next to each other, and Sirius can feel Remus’ warmth seep into him like fire. Sirius holds the photo up so they both can admire the mastery of Peter’s shabby charmwork.

“He’s getting better.” Remus comments, though he sounds distant.

“That he is,” Sirius replies airily, mostly because he can feel Remus staring at him from where they lay.

“Sirius,” Remus whispers and Sirius can feel the shudder that racks through every inch of his body. He hums quietly, “I want to, but if I do, I can’t turn back. If you say no, change your mind, or someone walks in-, we can’t take it back, I can’t take it back.” Remus doesn’t quite sound panicked so much as he sounds resigned, like no matter the reservations, he intends to do whatever it is anyway.

Sirius turns his head to gaze into Remus’ eyes, cloudy as ever, full of emotion that Sirius has never been able to pinpoint. “You won’t know until you try, Lupin.”

Remus raises the arm closest to Sirius, and for a brief second, Sirius fears he will be hit; instead, Remus lays his hand on Sirius’ right cheek, stroking gently.

“Tell me no right now, please. Don’t let me get the wrong idea. Please, Sirius, let me back out now.”

“I want this as much as you do.”

“That’s what I feared.”

And suddenly, Remus is atop him, straddling his waist, grasping at his cheeks, neck, and shoulders- anywhere and everywhere are Remus’ hands, traveling faster, heavier, and hotter than they should be allowed. Remus’ mouth is hot and wet on his own, clamping together. Their teeth clash, yet it’s far from the way Sirius’ teeth used to hit those of the girls he used to kiss. The way Remus positions himself seems almost purposeful. Remus’ hands land separately on Sirius’ body; one sits solidly on his left cheek, and the other sits smugly on Sirius’ stomach, holding him down.

Remus is rough in ways he’s never experienced before. Sure, some of the girls and boys he’d mess around with got bratty and wanted him to make them submit, but he’d never experienced being under someone like this. He was uneasy for about half a second before Remus ground his hips into Sirius. All his hesitation was suddenly vanishing, along with his self-control.

Sirius whined, long and loud, circling his hips in what he hoped was an enticing display of his want.

Remus chuckled, rubbing a long finger along Sirius’ cheekbone before humping once against Sirius’ fully clothed crotch.

“Please,” Sirius cried, and he wanted to feel shame for a moment, yet found he couldn’t entirely focus long enough for it.

“You beg so pretty, baby,” Remus whispers, moving down to kiss and suck and bite at Sirius’ neck, “tell me what you want, lovely, tell me all your fantasies.”

Sirius grunts, trying again to lift his hips up in some mindless attempt at direct friction against his cock.

“Clothes, please, Remus, please-” Sirius gasps as Remus leans down to press his face against Sirius’ crotch, placing soft kisses against his pants where his erection makes its presence known. “Merlin, fuck me, please Daddy, need you.”

Remus halts suddenly, and Sirius knows he’s fucked it all up again.

He’d heard his casual fucks say it before, and he’d never really thought much of it- if it gets you off, it gets you off. But for him to say it to Remus of all people?

“What did you call me?”

“’m sorry, Remus, I didn’t mean-”

Remus shifts, pressing his hard-on directly against Sirius’ crotch, slowly rubbing them together through their pants.

“What did you call me, Sirius?” Remus says again, evenly, as he presses himself into Sirius.

“Daddy,” Sirius whispers, though it comes out in more of a moan than he means.

Remus starts, roughly slapping both hands against Sirius’ thighs, “That’s the only name you ought to call me until after I’m done with you, yes?” Remus doesn’t wait for an answer, instead deciding to begin unbuttoning Sirius’ pants.

“Yes, Daddy,” Sirius replies, knowing it is obsolete.

Remus smirks, grasping Sirius’ pants and boxers and yanking them down. Sirius had hoped that there might be some resistance with his ass. Still, with how fast Remus had pulled -alongside the slight sting he felt there- he supposed resistance was relative.

Then, Sirius considers asking if he can have his shirt taken off as well before deciding the view of Remus stripping his shirt, pants, and underwear is far more critical. Remus catches him, though he says nothing, moving the hand that isn’t helping in removing his boxer to Sirius’ aching cock.

Remus’ hand works skillfully at quickly bringing Sirius to complete hardness in record time. Then, by the time Remus is entirely naked, Sirius is questioning whether or not he’s going to cum before Remus gets to do whatever he’s planning.

Sirius takes a shaky breath, suppressing the animalistic urge to hump into Remus’ hand and release. Then, he resists the urge to fuck up into Remus’ hand to see what will happen- he loses that battle almost instantly.

His hips lift twice before Remus jerks his hand away to grab Sirius’ ankles and bend him almost entirely in half. He whines again, although he feels more smug about the whole thing this time.

Remus moves his hands so one is positioned well enough to grasp Sirius’ ankles at once while the other moves down to land a vicious smack straight onto Sirius’ ass.

“Did I tell you you could fuck my hand?” Sirius shakes his head, swallowing the groan accompanying Remus’ cock aligning perfectly with Sirius’ ass crack. “Did you ask Daddy if you could fuck his hand?” Remus asks, and Sirius shakes his head again as Remus shifts the hand holding his ankle to be his arm, acting as a bar. “So, tell Daddy why you thought you were allowed to fuck his hand,” and suddenly Remus’ hand was resting on Sirius’ throat, and the world collapsed around them.

“I dunno,” Sirius replied dumbly, a mixture of truly not knowing why he did it and feeling so out of his element that his brain seemed to shut down. Remus stops.

“Sirius,” he says, but it lacks the wildness- the sexiness of Daddy Remus that Sirius was enjoying so thoroughly, “Are you alright?”

Oh.

“What?” Sirius asks, feeling suddenly very, very exposed. Why did everything stop so suddenly? Was Remus done? Did he get bored of Sirius that fast? But wait, he asked-

“Sirius, are you alright?” Remus reiterates, grabbing Sirius’ ankles and laying them back on the bed. He grabs his blanket -an old, ratty thing Sirius had once mocked before being informed Remus’ mum had made it for him- and covers Sirius up from his mid-stomach to his toes. “You looked really out of it- I’ve never seen anyone look like that. I was worried you were, well- I thought I might have triggered something, what with the throat thing.”

Oh.

Sirius lays very still for a second, his head spinning faster than ever before. None of this has ever happened before- not in a negative way, not at all, just never before. He swings Remus’ blanket off of himself, shoving it back into the corner so he won’t have to think about Hope Lupin while he fucks her son, and makes a beeline straight to Remus’ mouth.

They kiss harder than before, likely because Sirius is a hundred times hornier now than when they first started.

His skin feels like embers, and Remus pours whiskey onto growing flames as he drags Sirius’ shirt up and over his head.

“I want you so bad,” Sirius starts, and he wonders if he’s babbling before deciding he doesn’t care if Remus can understand him or not. “Daddy, please. Please, Daddy, take me. Fuck me raw, Daddy.” On and on and on as Remus lays him back down on the bed and pulls his legs back up. Sirius finds he quite likes the position, especially as Remus moves his hand to rest on Sirius’ throat.

He groans deep and gutturally and realizes he has never made a noise like that.

“Hold your legs up, baby,” Remus whispers, pulling his arm back from Sirius’ ankles, “you let them go and we’ll have problems.”

Sirius’ hands move of their own accord, grasping quickly at the flesh of his calves, holding his legs where they are despite the slight burn that resonates in his muscles.

Remus runs his free hand along the shaft of Sirius’ cock, lifting it up and off his stomach. Sirius can see the moment Remus realizes how awkward it would be to try to suck Sirius’ cock, and he really, really wants to laugh, but he swallows it down. Instead of sucking him off, Remus shimmies himself closer to Sirius’ crotch. He wraps his hand around both their weeping cocks, gripping tightly.

Sirius throws his head back, ignoring every sense that tells him to fuck into Remus’ hand again.

“Tell me how you’re feeling, baby,” Remus says, twisting his hand so one of his rings runs right under Sirius’ tip. He shudders, “how does my cock feel against yours? How does my hand feel, jerking you off?” Remus emphasizes his point by tugging slightly at Sirius’ dick, rubbing their tips together, despite knowing Sirius has many choice words about how he feels about the situation.

“So good, Daddy,” Sirius starts. However, it’s a shabby description of the wreckage Remus is leaving him in, “treat me so good, never want you to stop.” He babbles a bit after, and Sirius knows he must sound like a drunk toddler, but Remus doesn’t seem to mind.

“Tell me what else you want Daddy to do ‘so good’ to you,” Remus drops both their cocks suddenly, leaving Sirius to slap against his stomach angrily.

“Fuck me, Daddy,” Sirius moves his ass as much as he can given his position, “fuck me good and raw, split me down the middle.”

Remus grunts and Sirius counts it as a point to get Remus to lose control and take Sirius however he pleases.

Remus nods once before sticking a finger into Sirius’ mouth, shoving it a bit down his throat -Sirius is sure Remus felt something with his hand on Sirius’ throat- pulling said finger out and shoving it into Sirius’ ass at light speed.

Sirius had said he wanted to be fucked raw. Still, he supposes this isn’t too bad, especially once Remus seemingly gets bored of one finger, considers two, and then decides he doesn’t care about stretching him out, lazily using a lubrication charm.

Remus’ cock feels way better than it should have any business feeling. It pushes against Sirius’ walls, demanding attention in a way that Sirius cannot, or will not, ignore. For a moment, he considers how glad he is not to be a virgin, and also for having told Remus this some time ago- mainly for Remus not worrying about stretching.

Remus moves slowly, although Sirius is convinced he is already plowing into him. He sinks in completely eventually, bottoming out as Sirius decides that he’s dead and this is heaven.

“Still good, baby?” Remus asks, rubbing his thumb along the column of Sirius’ throat.

“So good, daddy.” Sirius supplies, lolling his head back as Remus begins slowly thrusting in and out, over and over and over and over again. Sirius listens to the smacking of Remus’ balls against his ass, to the sounds that escape his mouth, and to the sounds of Remus grunting as he ruts deep into Sirius.

There is a moment right before Remus finds Sirius’ prostate that Sirius wonders if he actually fell asleep in Peter’s bed and was now dreaming of being fucked good, deep, and slow by Remus Lupin; then Remus finds his prostate.

Sirius has screamed for several reasons throughout his life: to mock his mother, angrily at Regulus or James, and at girls who flirt with Remus -despite them not officially being together. Through all of his experiences of screaming, Sirius has never, in his entire life, screamed like that, or for such a reason as Remus’ cock pressing right into that beautiful bundle of nerves deep in his ass, before now.

As soon as Sirius finds himself back on planet Earth, he immediately finds himself spent, cum spilled all over his stomach. Additionally, Sirius finds Remus viciously and aggressively fucking into Sirius -slamming into his prostate repeatedly- as he mumbles to himself, chasing his high.

Sirius watches for a second, mesmerized, before realizing that Remus is staring directly back at him. Suddenly, Sirius is snapping into action, releasing his legs to free his hands -holding his legs back with the power of spite- and racing to grasp Remus’ face, pulling him as close as possible.

“Cum in me Daddy,” Sirius begins with, and he relishes in the way Remus shudders at the name, “fill me full of your cum, Daddy, want you dripping from me for the rest of the day.”

Sirius keeps one hand firmly in Remus’ hair, perfect for pulling him into hot kisses and pulling him away so he can hear Sirius’ pleas of desperation; the other hand Sirius uses to force Remus into putting actual pressure on his throat. It is heavenly, in a demented, deranged way -Bellatrix would be proud.

Remus finally moans, and it’s low and breathy and beautiful. It escapes out of him right before he slams into Sirius one last time- groaning for a long, long minute as his cum fills Sirius’ ass.

Despite this, Remus thrusts twice more, pushing his seed back into Sirius with vigor and muscle memory. Remus looks lost for a moment, as if so far removed from reality that he is unaware he’s still fucking into Sirius’ very exhausted hole -not that Sirius was going to do anything to stop him.

After a moment, Remus seems to finally come to his senses, pulling his cock out in one fluid motion- though he stops for a second to watch the cum leak from Sirius’ ass.

Then, Remus flops next to Sirius, taking a hand to playfully shove the other’s leg back down to the bed.

“Want to shower-”

“’Ello gent- holy shit!”