#obey me catholic

[mcx7demonbros]

One of the Brothers: *looks at MC with suggestive eyes and puts a hand on their thigh*

MC: *slaps the hand away* no, it’s Holy Week

[irishmammonagenda]

"Micheal. Who is that child?" You ask from the doorway where the Archangel and a pale girl bead rosary necklaces. You blink slowly as Michael turns his head to you and grabs the child into a hug.

"Her name is Luce. I would die for her." He says with all the might of the Celestial Realm itself.

"Ciao!" The girl grins, she looks like a Catholic Coraline, with a muddy yellow raincoat and bright blue hair to match.

"Huh."

Noticing your confusion Michael hums, "She's Italian, MC. She's also my new favourite person ever."

The girl just hums and continues her rosary making activity, counting ten beads before carefully bringing them through the string. Michael watches in adoration, looking five seconds away from whipping out the adoption papers.

He grabs his DDD, muttering something about 'getting his duolingo game on' and 'polishing up that Italian'.

You whistle and slowly back away, you might have pacts with all Seven Lords of Hell, and have Solomon the Wise, Barbatos, the Grim Reaper and the literal Prince of Hell wrapped around your finger, but Luce has the power of God and Anime on her side.

Finally, a worthy opponent. You just need to find out how to adopt her from Michael, and also start up a duolingo course in Italian.

[dirwael]

simeon, who tells himself that your soul will go to heaven. he tells himself that when your time comes, he will be able to greet you in the celestial realm, that he will smile at your halo and caress your white wings.

simeon, who hates the truth.

simeon, who knows that from your pacts on your skin - symbols of not even indulgence, flat out ownership of the seven sins - that you will be cast down to the bowels of hell. he knows that your soul will end up in one of the circles, where you will be punished for eternity, while he is supposed to turn a blind eye.

simeon, who can’t help but fantasize, but wish, but pray, that he could protect you in heaven. he dreams about hiding you in a forgotten corner of the celestial realm. he dreams about laying next to you in the plains, bodies concealed by the always blooming flowers.

simeon, who dreams about holding you.

simeon, who wishes he could kiss you.

simeon, who prays that he could be free to love you.

without the judgmental eyes of Him along his back.

[absolutepokemontrash]

The “brother in christ” thing gets even better when you consider that Jesus probably wasn’t even born at the time the brothers fell in Nightbringer lol

According to some religious texts that are not necessarily canonical to the Bible, but are still held in high regard (ie. Dante’s Divine Comedy) like Paradise Lost, Jesus was already around in Heaven when Lucifer was still an Angel, and part of the reason Lucifer fell was because Jesus was the one who was going to die for humanity. Lucifer wanted to do it for the glory, while Jesus wanted to do it out of love for humanity.

ANYWAY, none of that is really canon in Obey Me, but fucking imagine-

Mammon: Okay so what’s happening with Jesus over in the Human World?

Belphegor: I mean… something pissed him off, he’s flipping tables.

Mammon: Wait what?!

Beelzebub: Yeah, he caught a bunch of merchants in the Temple selling stuff and now he’s yelling.

Belphegor: Wait… merchants? (*turns to Mammon*) HOW DID YOU MANAGE TO PISS OFF JESUS?! HE’S LITERALLY THE MOST CHILL MOTHERFUCKER-

Lucifer: Mammon’s sin and scumminess can break even the most patient of men, it seems.

Mammon: Heheheheh… *sweats*

[saitamastamaticsoup]

Nightbringer is so funny bc if diavolo didn’t threaten to send us back to the human world(idk of that happens I’ve only heard) Lilith would still he here no? I don’t think she would be like a baby when they said she was reborn as a human I just assume they just put her in the world and erased her memories but she was probably reborn as a child and grew up. But she would still be around meaning that it would be so incredibly far into the past because even they had a hard time tracing MC’s lineage😭 so imagine going back to like a time before lightbulbs were invented. Absolutely the FUCK NOT!!! I could not for a second live as a small sickly Victorian child no way I would be able to survive watching people Live in their own filth😭🤢 I’m sorry i’m not witnessing slavery or the black plague Dia has me all the way fucked up I’m too spoiled by modern technology like socks and hoodies

[cephydeluxe]

if someone took a peek into my mind this past week, they’d think im some scorned ex-catholic nun with a vendetta against the almighty or some shit but no 😭😭😭😭 im just terminally simeon-brained and he’s making me go absolutely fucking bonkers

fr looking up shit like the “nephilim” and “hierarchy of angels” and I’ve only tasted a communion wafer once in my whole life

(STILL HAVEN’T REDOWNLOADED THE GAME IM STILL WINNINGGGGG🤩🤩🍾🍾💎💎💰💰💵💸🎉🎊🎊🎊🎉🏆🏆🥇)

[bnon360spin]

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[acaribeau]

I founded it!!

The plague that almost kill Solomon!

The three days plague in Jerusalem

13So Gad went to David and said to him, “Shall there come on you three b years of famine in your land? Or three months of fleeing from your enemies while they pursue you? Or three days of plague in your land? Now then, think it over and decide how I should answer the one who sent me.”

14David said to Gad, “I am in deep distress. Let us fall into the hands of the Lord, for his mercy is great; but do not let me fall into human hands.”

15So the Lord sent a plague on Israel from that morning until the end of the time designated, and seventy thousand of the people from Dan to Beersheba died. 16When the angel stretched out his hand to destroy Jerusalem, the Lord relented concerning the disaster and said to the angel who was afflicting the people, “Enough! Withdraw your hand.” The angel of the Lord was then at the threshing floor of Araunah the Jebusite.

17When David saw the angel who was striking down the people, he said to the Lord, “I have sinned; I, the shepherd, c have done wrong. These are but sheep. What have they done? Let your hand fall on me and my family.”

It was a punishment to his father, king David...

2 Samuel 24 if someone wants to read

[thecherrypitpie]

a post about a fic idea i will never write for lack of time and patience

imagine if michael really is nightbringer and Sky Daddy gets tired of him playing the villain in mc's demonic nancy drew adventure so literal *DIVINE INTERVENTION* is what sends mc back to their present... but at a cost.

they pop back up during a council meeting (totally not discussing how to next try to find mc and rescue them since solomon is taking forever)

lighting quick one of the brothers grabs mc to pull them in for a hug

mc: "no! don't" *squeezes eyes shut and screams, clutching their head*

when their eyes reopen they're a glowing iridescent white

mc?: "SAMAEL, IT IS TIME YOU RETURNED TO ME. GATHER THE OTHERS AND ASCEND TO MY SIDE ONCE MORE. DO THIS AND AS A GIFT FOR YOUR OBEDIENCE, YOU MAY KEEP THE MORTAL."

mc collapses, comatose into the arms of whomstever grabbed them first.

you, yes *you*, should write this and tag me so i can read it

[mcx7demonbros]

Catholic!MC: I’m a Catholic

Satan: *frowns*

Catholic!MC: I’m a CATholic

Satan: 😊

[irishmammonagenda]

Catholic MC gets sent into hell! Maybe it was clickbait!! (part three)!!!

introduction, part one, part two, part three (you are here)

content warnings: implied AFAB MC, they/them pronouns used, ambiguous ending? kinda short

The council room was once more enveloped in an awkward silence. Lucifer barely masks the distate in his eyes as MC utters the words.

Beel, stops munching on his snack, giving a sad but innocent (or as innocent as a demon can be) smile, "His name's Belphie... well...Belphegor but we call him Belphie...He's up in the human world right now for his exchange program...so you wont be seeing him I don't think."

MC nods absentmindedly, Lucifer, for being the Avatar of the Gays...(Pride joke) was acting kinda sus. (gay joke)...either way, this was fever dream inducing.

Simeon smiles awkwardly, something felt...off.

Lucifer clears his throat..."Anyway, Mammon will be responsible for taking care of you." He says practically thrusting Mammon in Mc's face, which made sense seeing as the tan demon in question was trying to book it.

"Nuhuh!"

"Yuhuh." Lucifer mutters under his breath.

"Nuhuh!" MC chimes in.

"Shut up both of you!" Satan says, knowing him having an 'outburst' would stress Lucifer out more. He wasn't actually annoyed, in fact, he was quite amused.

MC looks around at the Demons, Angels and very shady man that's definitely from France and thus cannot be trusted. (Solomon is in no way french, and is offended by that notion.)

"Okay...Sorry for freaking out earlier...." MC mumbles to the group embarassedly.

"You're fine! No harm was done" Diavolo reassures them, though Simeon still can't shake the feeling.

And that's fair enough, as up above, above the shining ever-present Devildom Moon, above the ever changing realm of the humans, above their fluffy clouds and shiny sun, in the Celestial realm a certain Archangel kept watch, watching his brothers, both estranged and un, the Devildom Prince and Butler, as well as the shadiest man he has ever met (who is not french apparently) and a small, fragile human.

He was omnipresent, a fly on the wall if you may, careful not to move lest the Prince or the Butler notice him. Shouldn't've prayed to him so much in such a short span of time, little lamb.

After all, we all have our skeletons in our closets, perhaps in our attics, too.

[magical-girl-rose]

Here's the 3rd part of Rosella's character lore drop

Sorry not sorry Mammon but you weren't Rosella's first. She had her first real boyfriend before her arrival as a human exchange student in the Devildom.

And the rest they say is history...

[diahsthings]

I mean I play and am obsessed with Obey Me. Literally wanting to fuck these demons. Yeah lady. I love demons. I would love to have all of the brothers and royals around my table.

But it's hilarious people out here caring that much about other people's religion. It's fun to mess with them too.

This is so fucking funny

[monicascot]

Elite University Indoctrinated Me Into The Woke Social Justice Cult | Woke Up

Kiyah Willis was indoctrinated into Critical Social Justice. Being a non-binary black female gave her special status in what she describes this intersectionality as the Olympics of victimization. For years she thought biological sex had no bearing on their gender identification

[xhunnybeeex]

kinktober post 1

Make Me God

TW// : NSFW content, religious themes, female anatomy, piv, oral (reader receiving), virgin reader, slight corruption kink, Priest! Anakin, pantie stealing, 

Anakin is sitting in his usual spot in the pews as you go to look for him. He holds his new vestments in his hands, gazing at them attentively. 

“They fit okay, Father?” you ask, sitting next to your friend. 

Anakin hesitates before answering, him becoming a priest slipping his mind. It was only a couple days since the young man had become a head figure at your guy’s church. Anakin had met you when you were young, 10 and 14. The both of you never went to the same school, for he was older and went to a private catholic school while you attended public classes. That never stopped the two of you from seeing each other at youth groups, church, and going out. Your parents liked the faithful, obedient man he has become as the two of you fell into your 20s. 

He blinks out of his trance and looks over to you. “Oh hey, sorry, this is all just so new still. It feels like a dream.” he chuckles, laying the folded cloth in his lap. 

“Its all official now!” you smile, excited for him. Your faith was everything to you, and he was wired the same way. Every action, every word, every thought, all to serve your savior. 

“It feels so different,” he admits. “ but in a way it’s like nothing has changed.” he plays with the cross on his neck, fiddling with the metal over his chest between his fingers. 

“What do you mean?” you ask. “Everyone sees me the same, nothing has changed in my reputation. But the power I have here, I think God can feel it." His voice is thick, his tone almost eerie. you nod delicately.  “I dont think it’s a bad thing people see you the same. They’ve always had high respect for you.” 

He pauses, his brows furrowed and his breathing slowed. “Do you?” he questions. Your palms begin to sweat and you begin to feel squirmy. “What? Of course I do, we all-” you ramble but he hushes you. “I didn't ask about everyone, I asked if you did.” he says sternly. He stands from his seat and towers in front of you as your back presses against the pews. “Anakin, i, of  course I do.” You mumble. He looks down at you and runs his knuckles down your cheekbone. 

“Of course you do, you would never disobey your father, your god.” His voice is silk. Your breathing halts and your legs cross. Your face turns away from his gaze and he can feel your body become warm. 

“You Are devoted to your god, aren’t to.” his hand holds your face up to look at his and his thumb presses under your jawline. “Yes father.” you mumble. His eyes move to your lips and he slowly moves his fingers to trace the pink skin. His fingers begin to force their way into your mouth. You don’t even think about moving, telling him to stop. This was your priest, you wouldn’t disobey. “Suck.” he mutters. You obey, sucking gently and swirling your tongue around his flesh. Your eyes are interlocked with his. His face is cold as his jawline is tightly clenched. 

He pulls his fingers out and moves down onto his knees, his face eye level with your stomach. He rolls your flowy sunday dress up your thighs and his jaw falls slack as he looks up and down your lace panties. “Your dripping, god made you so beautiful.” he kisses up your thigh as he slides the lace down your legs and stuffs them in his pocket, having no intentions to give them back to you. He licks a long stripe down your folds and your hands go to grip his shoulders when your body starts to shudder under him. His still wet fingers make their way into you and your nails dig into his shoulders through his button up. His lips wrap around your clit and his fingers curl inside of you. You bite your lip to muffle the sounds threatening to escape your lips. “Don't be quiet, let god hear how  good you feel.” 

He continues to tease you with the tip of his tongue.  your lips part  and your head falls back against the wooden pews. “You taste like heaven” he murmurs, almost too quietly for you to catch.

 He removes his fingers, leaving you to whine due to the empty feeling hes given you. He leaves kisses up your clothed stomach and makes his way up your jaw as he starts to stand and undo his belt. His pants and boxers fall to his ankles and he pulls your hips up to meet his. He lines your folds up with him before pushing himself into you. Your back arches and you cry out from the intense burn from your stretching pussy. 

“You're a virgin aren't you.” anakin asks, gripping your hips tightly as he gives you a moment to adjust. You nod frantically and he chuckles. “God would be proud of you.” He kisses your temple and begins to move his hips. The burn slowly turns into an intense feeling of pure pleasure. Low moans escape you and the priest's lips as he thrusts hard and slow into you. 

Sweat beads drip down his forehead and darken his blonde curls. His lips move to yours, his tongue slipping into your mouth. “Can you feel god through me?” he  grunts. “Yes, father.” you squeal. But with the way you are whining and clenching around him, he's convinced you are god, and this is heaven. 

His thrusting becomes quick and sloppy, your whining sounds like Hymns in his ear. He feels you clench around him and he holds onto your hips tighter, leaving dark bruises into your skin. “Let go, finish around your priest.” he commands, and you’ll always do what the father asks of you. 

You mind is fuzzy as he fucks you into oblivion. You feel the knot in your stomach unravel as anakin holds your body close to his chest, coating your walls with his orgasm. He pulls out, continuing to hold you close to him. He gently sets you on the pews. He takes your panties out of his pocket and wipes the slick around your folds to clean you up. He pulls his pants up and He slips them back into his pocket . He kisses your forehead and picks up his vestments and rubs your cheek with his thumb. “Will I be seeing you next Sunday, my dear?” Anakin asks. You nod and give him a small smile. “Yes father.” he smiles approvingly and walks to his office in the now empty church.  

AN//: OMGGG im so sorry this is late. This is my first one shot on tumblr and the first post for kinktober! Please like if you enjoyed and let me know if you would like to be tagged in the next post or to be removed from the current tag list. Love all. - beee! 

Tag list : @thesassypadawan @kirbie44danielle  @niconico33333777  @heelvr78 @goldie-00 @anakinstwinklebunny @enchant5d @bxbyysstuff @quandoquires @starwalkertales @rxaddix2 @necromancerrrs @s1aywalker @stephennglass @s1ck-skv1l @jyinnc @pxscalsofia

[absolutepokemontrash]

Y’all, this is going to be so random, but I was hit with a memory from my Catholic school days and I have this vivid memory of stumbling across a Bible story where Jesus walks into a village, sees someone possessed by a demon, and is like

“Begone, Beelzebub, go back to hell.”

And the demon just fuckin leaves because JC told him to

I always found that really funny, and even funnier when I think of it with Obey Me Beel-

Beel: He said I couldn’t possess that human anymore 🥺🥺🥺🥺

Belphie: Don’t you listen to that oily hippy! You can possess whoever you want, Beel.

Mammon: UGH, next thing you know Jesus is gonna be all “you can’t set up a shopping mall in the middle of the temple!” Like sorry you don’t like fun and money, bro 🙄